Christianity & Polyamory
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CHRISTIANITYChristianity & Polyamory hosted by QueerTheology.com an online course & POLYAMORY 1 UNIT 3 WORKBOOK Unit 3 Workbook Christianity & Polyamory Unit 3: The Poly God This week, we’re going to explore: 1. The Synergy Between Christianity & Polyamory 2. Polyamory & God’s Abundance 3. God’s Polyamorous Agape Love There’s also a workbook & some prompts • Considering the limits and possibilities of love in our life • Beginning to explore the poly possibilities of scripture CHRISTIANITY & POLYAMORY 2 UNIT 3 WORKBOOK There’s A Synergy Between Christianity & Polyamory At QueerTheology.com, our motto has always been “LGBTQ Christians have more to offer the world than what we are not.” For too long, we’ve been told that the only conversation to have around gender, sexuality, and faith is “whether it’s OK.” That same sort of thinking spills over into other conversations around sexuality and relationships. We get stuck at “is it ok?” rather than asking more insightful questions like “What does this add?” “How might this illuminate the divine?” “Where is God?” Hopefully by this point, you understand that open or polyamorous relationships can be a healthy and holy way to structure relationships, that there’s nothing inherently wrong with them. But if not, what Fr. Shay and I have also found is that constantly debating whether “it’s ok” (whether “it” is being LGBTQ, having premarital sex, or being polyamorous) is rarely insightful or effective. We’ve talked and worked with folks who weren’t convinced that “it” was “ok” but when we breezed past that question, eventually came around because the good fruits were just too obvious to ignore. So if you — or your parent or pastor — aren’t quite sold yet, suspend some disbelief or trust that you don’t have to have the “right argument” to convince them and let the next two weeks testify to the goodness of these relationships. As we’ve already touched upon, the intersections between polyamory and Christianity are many: love, justice, commitment, hospitality, to name a few. Over the next two weeks, we are going to explore in greater depth some themes and passages to see how a polyamorous approach might illuminate our understanding of the divine and how a Christian faith might add some new depth and meaning to our relationships (if that’s something we want). The examples that follow aren’t intended to be exhaustive or definitive. There are so many places poly folks might find inspiration in Scripture and Christian tradition. And for each of those, there are any number of ways that we might approach and interpret the text. These are some jumping off points to spark your creativity and get you thinking differently. CHRISTIANITY & POLYAMORY 3 UNIT 3 WORKBOOK What do we mean? Last year, I made a video talking about how I’ve come to experience the New York queer beach Fire Island (complete with nudity, sex, and drinking) as a sacred site. We’re going to be looking for such connections within our open and polyamorous relationships. Ultimately, we would love for you to bring your own experiences to bear on this. A key component is that it’s an embodied faith. Jesus was a person with a body who moved and ate and touched and hugged and laughed and cried. And Christians acknowledge the on-going work of the Holy Spirit in each of us. Christianity is alive. It’s alive within you. In this week’s and next week’s workbooks, there will also be some prompts and exercises for you to start thinking about the experiences, relationships, traditions, themes, and passages that are meaningful to you. The call of Jesus was never “study me” it was “follow me.” We don’t want you to just read our interpretations and then set them aside. We want you to put them into practice in your own life. And find new inspiration and interpretation that is unique to you. You are holy. CHRISTIANITY & POLYAMORY 4 UNIT 3 WORKBOOK Polyamory & God’s Abundance Abundance is a throughline in Scripture but for many, the idea that there is not just enough but more than enough can be a tough one to believe. And that’s understandable. In 2017, 1 in 8 Americans did not have consistent access to enough food for an active, healthy life and there were on average 554,000 homeless people on any given night. Our faith should have something to say about that but for too many Christians, the message proclaimed is anything but good news. Conservative, Evangelical, and Fundamentalist Christianity teaches scarcity — that God only loves certain people, that heaven is only big enough for a limited number of people, and that even if you think you’re saved, you might not really be. Maybe you didn’t mean it. Maybe you’re going to lose it. So prove you’re part of the in-crowd by participating more, giving more, and excluding others more. But that scarcity mindset is contrary to scripture. One of the most famous Bible passages is Jesus talking about abundance: “I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” - John 10:10 (ESV) Abundance was at the center of Jesus’s ministry. He turned water into wine. He transformed a moment of scarcity (a small number of fish and bread loaves) into a feast of abundance. He healed those who didn’t have resources. And abundance was central to the work of the early church, too: sharing everything in common, taking care of the sick, practicing radical hospitality, breaking down barriers that once divided us. CHRISTIANITY & POLYAMORY 5 UNIT 3 WORKBOOK Abundance can be at the center of our lives too. Not in a greedy way nor in a way that takes away from others nor in a way that offers false promises (I’m looking at you Law of Attraction). But rather in a way where we step into the good life that is possible for us all. Jesus opens his public ministry in Luke 4 by quoting Isaiah: “The Spirit of the Lord is on me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners and recovery of sight for the blind, to set the oppressed free, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.” The Year of the Lord’s favor is a reference to the Year of Jubilee that’s outlined in Leviticus: Leviticus 25 starts off by calling for a “Sabbath Year” every seven years. For that whole year, the idea is that you don’t sow your fields or prune your vineyards. You rest and you let the earth rest. Whatever the land happens to yield, you eat and you share with your family and hired hands and the residents of your area. Then, every seventh Sabbath Year—every forty nine years—is a Year of Jubilee. And this is where it gets really cool. The Year of Jubilee is God’s plan for a radical redistribution of land, and property, and freedom. It’s returning land that had been sold to pay debts, it’s canceling all debts, it’s setting slaves and their children free, and allowing all to eat from the food of the fields. This idea of abundance is found throughout the Hebrew and Christian Scriptures. CHRISTIANITY & POLYAMORY 6 UNIT 3 WORKBOOK Here are just a few passages for reflection: “God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” Romans 5:2-5 “God shows his love for us, because while we were still sinners Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8 “Give thanks to the God of heaven, for his steadfast love endures forever.” Psalm 136:26 And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed; 2 Corinthians 9:8 “I am the LORD your God, who brought you up out of the land of Egypt. Open your mouth wide, and I will fill it.” Psalm 81:10 “For he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things.” Psalm 107:9 “You crown the year with your bounty; your wagon tracks overflow with abundance.” Psalm 65:11 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these.” Matthew 6:25-34 CHRISTIANITY & POLYAMORY 7 UNIT 3 WORKBOOK Some Christian pastors will twist these verses to try to say that we are obligated to do something or indebted to God. Or that material abundance is proof of our good standing with God. But God wants us to know that there is enough. And more importantly, that we are enough. God doesn’t love us because of something we’ve done but because of who we are and who God is. God is love.