Fragility of Innocence
Total Page：16
File Type：pdf, Size：1020Kb
“…. the "Childqueen," that innermost self that you were truthfully and instinctively before the weight of the world came crashing in.” Kadhja Bonet 2018 Films used to be great. Now they’re easy to make, easy to sell, easy to get bored of. Everything’s 4 stars or more. Everything’s the best film of the year. Fast food films, fast food music, fast food politics, fast food ideologies. What’s the worth of working to live at the cost of your soul? So much so that you don’t want to live at all? L.A. Salami 2016 1 Contents Prologue ........................................................................................................ 1 Chapter 1 The Porch .................................................................................. 3 Chapter 2 John ......................................................................................... 33 Chapter 3 The Dock ................................................................................. 46 Chapter 4 The Lake .................................................................................. 69 Chapter 5 Dinner ..................................................................................... 89 Chapter 6 The Tour ................................................................................ 113 Chapter 7 Jackie ..................................................................................... 133 Chapter 8 Atlanta .................................................................................. 159 Chapter 9 The Interview ........................................................................ 174 Chapter 10 Kirby .................................................................................. 197 Chapter 11 The Barn ............................................................................ 220 Chapter 12 Phil Blake .......................................................................... 231 Chapter 13 Thomas ............................................................................. 254 Chapter 14 Beatrice ............................................................................. 275 Chapter 15 The Woods ........................................................................ 313 Chapter 16 Africa ................................................................................. 326 Chapter 17 Mothers and Daughters .................................................... 349 Chapter 18 Heather ............................................................................. 370 Chapter 19 Tea and Scones ................................................................. 388 Chapter 20 Ficksburg ........................................................................... 420 Chapter 21 Josh ................................................................................... 442 Chapter 22 Boston ............................................................................... 465 Chapter 23 Innocence ......................................................................... 491 1 Chapter 24 Friday the 19th ................................................................... 515 Chapter 25 The Internet Cafe .............................................................. 532 Chapter 26 Heather & Jackie ............................................................... 553 Chapter 27 Thanksgiving ..................................................................... 568 Chapter 28 The Game .......................................................................... 591 Chapter 29 Shadow ............................................................................. 620 Chapter 30 Thenjiwe ........................................................................... 634 Chapter 31 Ice Fishing ......................................................................... 655 Chapter 32 The Countdown ................................................................ 678 Chapter 33 The Conversation .............................................................. 694 Chapter 34 The Senator ....................................................................... 705 Chapter 35 Brothers ............................................................................ 717 Chapter 36 Today ................................................................................ 736 Chapter 37 Revelations ....................................................................... 758 Chapter 38 The Other Side of the Lake ............................................... 770 Chapter 39 Aftermath ......................................................................... 786 Chapter 40 Frank ................................................................................. 797 Chapter 41 Finale ................................................................................ 805 Epilogue .................................................................................................... 829 Location Map – John’s Property ............................................................... 831 2 Prologue He had grown old. He was in his nineties now. But he couldn’t imagine his life having been any different or any better. There was a time his only companions were the trees, and his Labradors. With his loyal Labradors alongside him, he had explored every inch of the woods. They had swum with him in the lake and as a young man, been there when he experienced the despairing loss of his mother. His beloved Labrador, Callie had trekked with him amongst the forest trees of the wilderness for many days, sharing his pain and providing him comfort during those interminable nights when the stars barely flickered through the trees that towered over him. Those trees, he thought, they were much older than himself and had been so vital in keeping his earliest memories alive. They had seen it all. They were with him when he ran freely as a boy, pretending to be those adventure book characters that spawned his many boyhood fantasies and dreams. They had witnessed the decisions. He remembered one impossibly difficult decision that changed everything. They were there then, giving him strength and encouragement. If only he could tell those trees how important their role had been in his life. He was sitting in his favourite chair brought up from the old house. Gazing out the large picture window he was reminiscing about his own good fortune in having had such great people share his life. He thought he could hear their voices telling his story. They had stood resolutely watching over him every day of their lives, since the very first day he had met each of them. He felt that those who had passed on were still watching down upon him, still following the progress they had started. “They could tell a great story”, he whispered to himself. He remembered how the trees had once helped him hide from a world he couldn’t understand. He had believed that was best, until one day there came a stranger from a far‐off country. He had knocked at his door and derailed his peace. But the stranger’s intentions were good and true, opening his eyes to a much more lasting peace, a peace no longer entrenched in hiding, but enlightened by knowing. The strength he had back then had faded with the years. But no longer was it required. There have been others who had carried the load, taking what he began, growing it and helping it bloom. Nearly fifty years ago, a little boy without a mother touched his heart. He still remembered the aching pain he felt for the little boy’s 1 loss, his diminutive and saddened figure sitting alone beneath the big old tree, talking to the mother he had lost. The little boy had torn him from his despondency, emboldened him to peer beyond the trees, and at the world he had shunned for nearly thirty years. The little boy, with his straggly straw‐coloured hair and eyes too hollow for such a young age, had unwittingly played his role in releasing the forces which built the miracle that followed. They were a dedicated few, his friends. The love between them grew stronger as the struggle deepened. His fondness for those who are not with him now, had not dimmed. He had longed for them over the years and still he missed them today as he gazed out at the trees. The moisture in the corner of his eyes was joined by his smile as he reminded himself, they too would be missing him. It was nearly time for his coffee. 2 Chapter 1 The Porch The potholed road from the village had narrowed into a single lane. Above him the tree canopy was intertwined as one, blocking out all but the occasional slivers of sun. The strobe effect of which was annoying him. The undergrowth of shrubs, ferns and smaller trees were very close, right up to the edges of the lane. It was lush but impenetrable. He felt it closing in, just as he had felt his world sometimes closing in these past few years. He had experienced that feeling more of late. Each time he had shaken free and started again. Why this time, when he was so close? An omen perhaps. Phil rounded the last of the bends, a little gentler than those before. Suddenly he had broken free of the claustrophobia he wasn’t enjoying. Near darkness was replaced by filtered sunlight and his feeling of impending doom vanished. It was behind him, where it belonged. He had just passed the transition zone, as he was to discover later. That boundary keeping John safe from the outside world. He had unknowingly entered John’s sanctuary, his house in the woods. A short distance later, Phil listened to the almost imperceptible squelching of tyres on soft grass. Just for a moment he feared he had somehow ended up in the wrong place. He had followed