2018 Baltimore Kinetic Sculpture Race Spectators' Guide
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20th Annual Baltimore Kinetic Afternoon route Lombard Street Pagoda Mud Medic Butchers’ Hill + Food: Sculpture Race Restrooms Sand Wild Thyme Washington Miss Twist www.KineticBaltimore.com Hill Kinetic Souvenirs May 5, 2018 Little Pratt Street Avenue Central Ave Italy Linwood President Street Eastern Ave Handlebar Eastern Avenue Cafe Patterson Park Camden Street Caroline Obstacle Course Yards Inner Sticky 301 S Patterson Park Ave Harbor Fleet Street Rice 1:15–3:15pm Light Morning route Harbor East Aliceanna Street Morning Key Highway AVAAVAM Fell’s Boston Street 800 Key Hwy Battery Avenue Point 8:00–10:00am 3:30–7:00pm Avenue Kenwood Encantada Federal Hill Park Afternoon Restrooms Morning 900 Battery Ave Park & Perk (morning) 10:03–10:20am Riverside Avenue Miss Twist (afternoon) Baltimore Kinetic Harbor Food: Key Souvenirs Absolutely Perfect Afternoon Restrooms Miss Twist Highway Medical + Tent Covington Clement Canton Little Havana Map by Tom Jones Waterfront Park 5/2 3200 E Boston St Race Pace Jackson 11:15am–1:00pm Bicycles The Kinetic Sculpture Race Fort Avenue is hosted by the American Visionary Art Museum www.AVAM.org Lawrence 410-244-1900 Schedule Street It’s a race! Times are approximate and anything may change as needs must. Afternoon Morning 1:00–1:30 Up Kenwood, Right on Eastern, Left on 8:00–9:30 Safety check & brake test at AVAM Linwood & into Patterson Park 9:30–10:00 Opening ceremonies & LeMans, 1:15–3:15 Patterson Park Obstacle Course: start onto Key Hwy Sand, Mud, & Pagoda Pit Crew Challenge 10:03–10:20 Climb Battery Ave into Federal Hill Park 3:30–4:45 Race down Lombard, Central Eastern, Pier 5, Pratt, 10:15–11:30 Down Riverside, Fort, Lawrence, Key Hwy, Light, Key Hwy, Lawrence, Fort, Jackson, Clement, around Inner Harbor, President, 360° and north up Covington to the finish line at AVAM around Katyn Circle back up to Fleet to (first racers may finish ~3:30) Caroline to Aliceanna & down Boston St 4:00–6:00 Post-race recovery (dinner for racers & volunteers) 11:15–1:00 Splashdown at Canton Waterfront 6:00–7:00 Awards Ceremony at AVAM AVAM’s 20th Baltimore Kinetic Sculpture Race Spectator’s Guide Saturday 5 May 2018 Race Day (Some) Kinetic Awards As with any human-powered dash for glory, times overlap ACE: The highest race challenge is the ACE. ACE pilots can’t and are approximate! The race does not stop for rain, heat, swap or have forward propulsion assistance at any time, cold, graupel, or any other sub-calamitous conditions. can’t get out to push or pull especially at the water exit, 8:00–9:30 Pre-Race: See sculptures in unsullied glory, but sand, or mud. Each team going for ACE has a green license don’t disturb the frantic teams. See “Getting to AVAM”. Get plate and a merciless ACE judge watching every move. coffee from the Park & Perk truck at AVAM. Art: Coveted award for best artistic design, reflected in color, humor, costumes, theatrical appeal, and kinetic motion. 9:30–9:59 Opening Ceremony: Kinetic oratory, lighting of the eternal flame, and Sister Euphonia O’Blivion blesses “de Best Pit Crew: for greatest patience, ingenuity, and quick feet” of the Kinetinauts on the steps of the AVAM plaza. thinking, often in the face of kinetic disaster. 10:00 Le Mans Launchgong at AVAM. Pilots & pit crew climb Engineering: Awarded to the most ingenious technical Federal Hill. When the gong starts the race, they run down to design tackling the rigors of the race. their parked vehicles and ride off. Golden Dinosaur: Awarded to the most memorable break- 10:01–10:20 Federal Hill: The racers climb down, or first to break down. steep Federal Hill. (Anyone can make a Kinetic Sponsors Golden Flipper: The most interesting water entry. sculpture; the human-powered part is hard.) Grand Mediocre Champion: #1 of all awards, for Some sculptures break down before they finishing in the middle (after time penalties). get this far (seriously). Sculptures return Next-to-Last: The penultimate finisher. shortly along Key Highway after the south- ern loop. People’s Choice: Most popular, based on crowd surveys taken by Kinetic Chickens. Running Late? From I-95 take exit 55 onto Sock Creature of the Universe: Each sculpture Key Highway north. must have a sock creature; this goes to the best. 10:15–11:30 Southern Loop and around Speed: Fastest team (after any time penalties). the Inner Harbor: The sculptures pass Inner Harbor landmarks (photo opportuni- 2018 Folklore Award: for most profoundly fulfill- ties!), into Harbor East, and Fell’s Point. Tip: ing the theme of this year’s race. Park two hours free in Whole Foods’ garage Worst Honorable Mention: Awarded to the team on Aliceanna Street if you get lunch there. whose half-baked “engineering” did not deter its 11:15–1:00 Canton Waterfront: Sculptures Pilot(s) from the challenge of the race. go down the ramp into the harbor. Watch Kinetic Glossary unseaworthy sculptures sink. This is the most popular spectator site. Get food from AVAM: The American Visionary Art Museum is Absolutely Perfect Catering and Miss Twist. founder and sponsor of Baltimore’s East Coast Championship Kinetic Sculpture Race. 1:00–1:30 Up the Hill to Patterson Park: This goes quickly, and you don’t want to Barnacle: A 93+ pound human who rides on a miss... sculpture but doesn’t provide propulsion. Bush League: Sculptures that complete the entire 1:15–3:00 Patterson Park Sand & Mud: The course except the water entry. mud is on a slight hill—easier for spectators, harder for racers. There’s street parking Checkpoints: To prevent unauthorized short- around the park perimeter. Near the mud cuts, teams stop at secret checkpoints. are Wild Thyme and Miss Twist food trucks. Hobart Brown: In 1969, the Glorious Founder 3:30–4:45 Back to AVAM for the Finish: created the first raceable Kinetic Sculpture in Kinetinauts are exhausted and sculptures Ferndale California and spread Kinetics around spread out down Lombard Street in the world. We miss his boundless enthusiasm. Butcher’s Hill back through the Inner Kinetic Chickens: Volunteers who make the race Harbor. Each team breaks through a huge possible and answer spectators’ questions. banner on Covington Street to finish at Kinetic Grand Championship: Our Baltimore AVAM. race is a qualifier for the Grand Championship in 4:00–6:00 Dinner: You should eat. Miss Humboldt County, California—42 miles for 3 days Twist truck serves ice cream at AVAM. If over Memorial Day Weekend. Sculptures cross you’re clean check out Encantada atop 2 miles of Humboldt Bay, a swampy slough, and AVAM or Rusty Scupper seafood across down a huge sand dune called Dead Man’s Drop. the street (reservations recommended). 2018 is their fiftieth anniversary! Learn more at Ten-minutes’ westward walk to Light Street KineticGrandChampionship.org. in Federal Hill with two dozen awesome Kinetic Kops: Officers issue tickets to sculptures local restaurants. Big tourist restaurants line when they break rules (and sometimes when the Inner Harbor north bank. they don’t). Kops are known to accept bribes to overlook all but ACE and safety infractions. 6:00–7:00 Awards Ceremony: Just from spectating, you’ll be exhausted—imagine Kinetinauts: Fearless artist-engineer-pilots. how the racers feel! Cheer on the winners Volunteers: Folks who have a lot of fun and make in the AVAM Sculpture Barn. the race happen! Sign up at KineticBaltimore.com. AVAM’s 20th Baltimore Kinetic Sculpture Race Spectator’s Guide Saturday 5 May 2018 Getting to AVAM What to Wear Parking: Street parking is scarce on race day. You can pay to You should wear something fabulous! Many folks wear park at the Rusty Scupper Marina just across Key Highway, festive outfits (see below) and you should too. Ransack your or various lots and garages to the west and north. Prices attic, or head to a vintage store like DeBois Textiles Boutique vary considerably—see Parkopedia.com for details. on Washington Avenue in Pigtown for an ideal Kinetic Outfit. MARC and Amtrak trains: run from DC, Philly, and else- If you dress well, find a KineticBaltimore.com photographer where to Penn Station, then taxi or Circulator Purple (below). (in a bright yellow shirt & feathered blue hard hat), and your See mta.Maryland.gov/marc-train and Amtrak.com. photo may appear in this year’s website coverage or the Charm City Circulator: Free pleasant buses every 10–15 2019 Spectator’s Guide! minutes 9am–midnight! Purple Route from Penn Station to Science Center near AVAM; Orange and Green Routes to Spectate from One Spot… Fell’s Point; Banner Route from Inner Harbor past AVAM to Ft Since the sculptures navigate 14 miles through the city, the McHenry. Maps & info at CharmCityCirculator.com. Also see. easiest way to spectate is to pick a spot and watch them Light Rail: Take a train to Camden Yards, a pleasant 20 pass by. Parking is plentiful along some stretches (especially minute walk to AVAM. Park free at Falls Road or Lutherville the blue morning and orange afternoon routes on the map). to the north near I-83; or Cromwell/Glen Burnie near I-97 to There are sometimes last-minute route changes. However, the south. Light Rail meets Amtrak at Penn and BWI stations. most spectators brave the crowds at AVAM, Canton Water- See mta.Maryland.gov/light-rail front, and Patterson Park, where sculptures and spectators congregate for the festive kinetic atmosphere. Attractions near AVAM 1. AVAM: The American Visionary Art Museum hosts …Or Follow Along intuitive, self-taught work by artists compelled to create.