Parents Often Say They Want Their Children to Be Happy, Feel Good About Themselves And

Parenting Article No. 57

CHRISTMAS MEMORIES LAST A LIFETIME

Christmas holidays can be a testing family can do with this day what they choose – time for families for many reasons. within reason. Set aside time on the calendar for With the end of the year approaching family events and decide what these are going to fast and an apparent increase of be. demand for our time we would love to magically pull another couple of Make holiday agreement about how long children hours a day out of the air. What tends can spend watching TV or playing video games. to suffer is either our sleep or the time we usually How many sleepovers they can have or outings spend as a family. with friends? Once this is negotiated, you are passing the responsibility of this to your children. Children seem to look forward to Christmas each If your child asks to watch a video or stay over at a year because of the gifts and the holidays. We as friend’s house you can refer them back to the parents often look forward to Christmas because agreements and remind them of what the we see it as a chance to spend so called quality time expectations are. It may mean that a “trade-off” is with our children. But does this always happen? required. Most of the time, the ideas that we have about how we would spend the holidays don’t come to Discuss as a family what it is that you would all fruition. like to do together. Make these times just for your immediate family – no ‘tag alongs’. Spend this The grand plans we have about family outings and time reflecting about the year and talking about fun get togethers are not necessarily what other what it is your children hope for in the coming members of our family have in mind. Whilst we year. These times do not have to be filled with may want to go for quiet picnics or have dates at expensive outings – they can just be down at the the movies, our children are thinking about park or going for a long drive together. sleepovers and shopping adventures with their friends, going down to the skate park or playing Give your children ( and yourself) the opportunity video games all day. The conflicting ideas about to just rest. Every day of their holidays does not what is a good way to spend our time over the have to be filled with an activity. Let them stay in holidays can cause tension. Any wonder by the end their pyjamas until lunch time, encourage them to of the holidays, many parents are saying ‘Thank just spend time in their rooms reading or goodness, they’re back to school next week’ reorganising. Encourage them to bring their friends over to your house so that you can get to know So how do we deal with these conflicting ideas? them. What plan of action can we put in place to reduce the amount of stress experienced by our family? Whichever way you and your family choose to The key word here is ‘Plan’. Most families have spend the holidays, take the opportunity to house rules, many of which are negotiated with the make it last a lifetime – memories of happy whole family present. Sit down and talk with your family get togethers are gifts that we can take children about how they would like to spend their with us wherever we go and be models for our holidays and communicate to them how you would children when they have their own families. like to spend it also. Draw up a holiday calendar and allocate two or three days to each person. Each member of the

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