That Friday free thing Leeds Stude Friday, April 27, 2007 VOL37:ISSUE 19 m_ Spate of sexual assaults continues in Hyde Park

By Jessica Geen injuries. Officers have stepped back from saying the perpetrator as a serial attacker. A man in his twenties from the A 22 car-old medical student has Halifax area was arrested in become the Wiest victim of a spate of connection with the first two Hyde sexual assaults in Hyde Park Park assaults a few days afterwards. The female student is bylined to but was later released without have been approached by a man who charge. enganed her m cons-eNation before Acting Detective Inspector Stilton attacking her He then ran off in the Atkinson from Weetwood CID has direction of Brudencll Road. sought to reassure students. He said: The incident occurred just after -We are conducting door-to-door 5.30am on Sunday on Hessle enquiries around Hesslc Terrace. Terrace The suspect is described as which will continue, and we arc an Asian male with short dark hair. stepping. up police presence in the rive feet 10 inches tall. of medium area with increased patrols." He build and between 25 and 30-years- stated that the latest incident is nor old. He was wearing a ritund-neck heing treated as related to the sexual navy jumper Mel' a light-coloured assault on a student near Devonshire top. and dark trousers. Halls last week. Police have confirmed that they Jenny Mensah. a second year are linking this incident to two other Classics student, was in the area assaults on women in Hyde Park at early on Sunday morning. She said: the beginning of this month. On both "I think there were a few officers occasions. the women were grabbed around, but at the time I didn't think from behind. but subsequently anything of it. It was light when we managed to escape with minor came home though, so these crimes are literally happening in broad daylight. I think the student bubble Pollee Advice: we were all living in has finally burst. I'm really getting scared to Avoid walking alone after dark. leave my own house now." Sarah Wayman. LAM Women's Keep to busy, well lit roads and Officer. said: "These assaults try to look confident even if you highlight the need for everyone to be don't feel it. aware of their own safety and their friends', and also he sure not to If you think you are being behave in a way that could be followed, cross the road and perceived as threatening to others." keep walking. If it continues, She added: "We still distribute attack head for a busy area or lighted alarms that can be picked up from the house to ask for help. Student Advice Centre in LAX.- Dl Atkinson said police are Get a personal attack alarm and continuing to appeal for witnesses. carry it in your hand. He said: "If you have information LINDSAY ANN HAWKER'S FUNERAL: Mourners gathered at Coventry Cathedral yesterday to bury Leeds about this incident. I would ask you Biology graduate Lindsay Hawker. She was found dead in bath full of sand by police in Tokyo, where she When you go out, tell people to get in touch with the police had moved to be an English teacher after graduating last June. Her family, from Brandon in Warwickshire, what time you expect to arrive immediately on 0113 24 1 3495." made emotional tributes to a "beautiful and principled" girl who they were all proud of. home. • Smokers reprieved (3) • LSTV awards(5) • Cottaging (10) • Student parents(12)

Leeds Student www.leedsstudentorg.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 2

Ono office? Dazed eyes crossed the room. Our VC - a medic by professi monthly mutual mass debate: coatinue on thick fog of smoke descended on Someone lights up and a husky voice ahem, fuming about the issue. WO i - e cigatenes. If only sex was regular- s )) the new batch of Union Councit- selling says: "It's a smoker's choice whether only place on campus where rigs e 1, nn A lors this week. They were aching. ly so long and surprising. they smoke, we're not creating a nanny purchased and But wait, who brought this motion s been lobbying th to be as democratic as possible in Mon- state"- Nanny state. they exhale! Union to pop a Nicoretie patch on e forward? Well, the Executive. the people leo day's inaugural meeting. As ever, LS' I Remember that next rime you try and his arrival. He's even offered to cle voted in to represent as. And who decides an covered the revered event from a safe chs• buy a Nestle chocolate bar from the sate the Union for its drop in peek on it'? Union Council. We voted for them Lance. In fact, safe enough to involve shop.) The 'revelation' that the anti-fag upping the grant it gets from the o Neighbours and a Guinness. but suffice as well. right? Yes indeedy - no secrets kki. majority weir mainly non-smokers them- sity. But the extent of our addietictu to say a battle was sea here. But wait, didn't we do some ques- selves. apparently empowered the fingers knows no bounds. A simple dilemma: sell cigarettes and tionnaire about this smoking lark over of democracy to overrule the rationale of Perhaps non-smokers might ho Easter? Yep. that's correct. And what c eontinue slowly killing the members. or said group because, for want of a better wider issues with tobacco. ceinp stop selling cigarettes and lose an esti- happened with that? Well, about 60 per ao4 explanation, "it has nothing to do with smoking and the like, But then, °fainte mated .C45.000 profit. As Dick Turpin vent said. 'ban smoking'. st, them". So why waste so many resources smokers are a legally recognised minoth might put it.. your money. or your life?' And suddenly, regardless of all that, a asking questions to people we intend to with actual rights and With a nationwide smoking ban set 10 big. fat 'pro choice' penny drops in to the if diverse eaten et ignore? Let's have a rational think (the yellow-fingered art. begin on July. I. the - cough cough, hack, f.4rn LUU pot. Why would our represen- All this talk of ma sort of grown up thing, un-chemically spiracy is making me waiver. Pat sth cough...hack, excuse me - the resulting tatives turn their backs on the voters they ie for a fag, decision after two and a half hours of the desperately convinced to propel them addicted people dot. Students: any questions?

By Alex Doorey tenor was suffedne from an Identity and justiee." whether he still believed that young 4 crisis: highlighting comments that Berm When asked what the Conservatives people were coming out of higher had made in a recent trip to America would do to remedy the rising number of education without the skills necessary in where he condemned the use of the war gull and knife crimes in urhan areas such the workplace. a statement he made when GLOBAL Students were given the cluster to put he was still Head of the 031, he stood by politicians in the hot seat when BBC on terror phrase. us Leeds and Manchester. Davis said that Other questions focused on the the Party would focus on the basics in his eonvictions. Radio talk slaw,. Any Questions? came to "Young people enter the workplace By Alex Doorey Leeds last Friday pensions scandal and The compensation change the situation: "Tons Blair once Bernard Matthews is to receive after the was tough on en me, tough on with no soft their communication is The slims, hnxtulcast from said that he not up to scratch and they lack the skills Lawnsscocal High Set-axle encouraged culling ill thousands of the company's the causes of crime. Well, we want to birds during an avian flu scare earlier in badly needed in business." he said. he founder of hip-hop label pupils and university students alike to pot deal with those causes of crime, the the year. culture surnninding the people that Jones were on to blame parents, Def Jam has called far three their questions to a panel of guests, Once of air, teachers and the students themselves for sexist and racist words to te itteltaltrie Shadow Home Secretary David ',ea Stedfre had a commit those crimes. ehaniee to catch up with the panel. "We want to give young people the drop in business skills. "It's no one's harmed from songs. Davis, International Development Speaking about the upcoming elections. opportunities that are not criminal. so that fault but the teachers anti parents." he Russell Simmons said there was Secretary Hain) Bean. Lib Dem Higher "growing public outrage" 4tuul the Education spokesperson Sarah leather David Davis was keen 10 stress that the the person they hack up to the most is not said. "Kids should take more Conservatives had much to offer the 18- the local drug dealer." He also said that responsibility for themselves too." use of the terms, which hr and former Head of the C131 Sir Digby said I 30s voting group. should be viewed as the Jones. the party would work to create a strong When LS asked him what the market same as "We can offer social mobility and was like for graduates emerging from "extreme curse words". The panel were quieted with on-the- base for stable families_ "70 per cent of omit-tunny fur youngsters. irrespective of spot questions front metnhers of the troublemakers are from broken homes. University this year, he said: "It's He asked broadcasters and their hackground," he said. "We also audience in a live broadcast on Radio 4. But this is not their fault, at is their society, fabulous, If you've got a skill, you'll be in record companies to volumey hold a level of idealism for youngsters, for One of the ten demanding questions, put The culture needs to change." work for the rest cif your life. The private remove. bleep or delete the wards example I am a strong opponent of the ID Sir Dighy Jones agreed that the family from music. And he suggested fumed he Editor of feeds Student Ben sector pays graduates E8bilhon more than can! and defeated the government on the Schofield, asked whether the war on was an imponant factor in shaping the non-graduates. and that's not even setting up an industry watchdog to 90 day trial proposal. We can offer Liberty future cif young people. When asked including the public sector payouts." recommend guidelines for lyrical and visual standards. Simmons. the pioneering entrepreneur whose label bus Women inspire at forum released music by Public Enemy, Run DMC and the Beastie Rays. objects to the use of "nigger", "he" By Katy Palmer Trauma After Rape), a full time Engineer Louise Jennings also and can run the country. she replied: and "hitch". parent. and an engineering lecturer at admitted that she found working in "I think Clare Short would he a great He said: "The words "bitch' and Leeds University. such a traditionally male dominated Prune Minister. But for me, it depends "ho" are utterly derogatory and A variety of issues were discussed. Field something of a novelty at first. more on our definition of natural disrespectful of the painful. hurtful. A panel of female stars spoke out including: the multiplicity of a But in ieeponse to the question about leadership. gentler shouldn't be the misogyny that, in puniculat about the role of women in society at woman's role in society. the stay at whether women are natural leaders issue." African-American women have the Inspirational Women's Forum on home patent, and positive experienced in the United States us Tuesday. discrimination. Most of the panellists. pivns, aititnaecasn1;_itty1-7 hianstodry of fot.eppti n rcgsslann; The fonon, eel up as part of the felt women made equally. Oleo ive. NUS Women in Work campaign. vs as but leaders with different skills to organised by LUU Women's men. and that the prohlem was "The word "nigger" is it racially Assembly and started with a respecting the different ways in a hich derogatory term that disrespects presentatin by LUU Chief Executive men and women lead. the pain_ suffering, history of facet Lesley Dixon. the only female Chief The talk was followed by questions oppression, and multiple forms of biceeutise out of the top ten UK from the floor and some stimulating racism against African-Amencaris students' union, answers. The issue of the remaining and Other people of colour." Dixon spoke of the obstacles she existence of the glass ceiling was s called together faced in her journey to the top of her thrown into question, as was the Simmons music chosen carver. She fell this was a nature-nurture debate, and the validity influenti al slower journey for women, due to the of the term 'emotional intelligence'.

complacency within Students' Unions. For vs omen's rights at work to added: "Ii is important to re ;den! The second speaker wits Rosamund improve, the consensus was that emphasisedisctssinnswithindnsityl that our itena McCarthy, a lawyer who crew up women have a varier!, of roles in during the second wave of feminism. society, amid should riot be expected to are not about censorship. She touched MI the grim tie progrese choose between parent and worker.

in women's legal rights, Students then Full .tune parent Anna Longhawn heard from a member or the Fabian argued that her role should be seen as INSPIRATION: Forum panel always fright to left/ Lesley Dixon, Rosamund This is a first step. Wi a doll ifiClesy. a eoonhtint.ir rout; the rape a valid job in itself and did not make McCarthy, Seema Malhotra, - census charity STAR (Sur, is trio hem a house Jennings Anna longhawn, Barbara Siedlecki and Louise [mesa ee and a consti'enie le' dual 94' P%iild•:rirwitt- want Chi.. industry to iieenp Leeds Student newspaper -151/Editor - Ben Schofield / Alum:fate Editor - Ky Capel / News - Alex Doorey, Charlotte Griffiths & Rachel Hunter / Under the Radar Michael Wooldridge, Sam Ward & Stephan Page / Extra - James Gardiner, Jessica Parker & Matt Andrews! Comment - Hind Hassan 1 Sport • Adam Lord & Ahrari Symonds-Baig / Photos - Patrick Nixon & Emma Daizelll / Online • Barry Carlyon Adverdein solistaltt - Hannah Swales / Advert design - Rebecca Edlin COPY °OOr' - Vicky Sharkey, Barmy Alwakeel, & Jessica King

Leeds Student newspaper, Leeds University Union, PO Box 157, Leeds, LS1 1UH; (0113) 3801 4.50; [email protected] To advertise email [email protected] Leeds Student www.leedsstudentorg.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 3

A showcase of LS:TV enjoys success at musical talent national awards show By Virginia Newman eine Polka' by Henryk Gorecki, and an By less Geen Ls. elLianing new members. and if some- vonamtniLIII :11S.1 enjoyment 01 our mem- arrangement of Wham hits by Leeds one's got a great idea, well make sure it bers, composer Martin Watkins. gets to .air. As it result, I think our broad "Over ihe coming year, we :tins to Cassandra Hodgson. a first year range of programming and huge creativity baa:ome a more valuable and more easily The greatest talents, in contemporary Music and English student and mem- LS:TV has won six awards at the 2007 really impressed the judges." accessible media resource in our Union music are in Leeds !us April 20 to 29 ber of 'LS TWO' the School of National Student Television Awards, He added: "What makes use es-p ecinfly and we hope we have now earns enough to take part in a series of concerts pm Music's contemporary music ensem- including Best Broadcaster. proud is the fact we won so many awards recognition to achieve that. Next week we on by the School of Music, ble, said: "It was certainly a challenge The station, which has only been a with so little equipment. We have three will be broadcasting some of our best The series of programmes has been interpreting alien symbols and making NaSTA member for three years, won cameras which constantly break. one edit work every day m Millennium Square as showcasing the talents of musicians them music. It was great hearing the almost half t+t- the 14 awards at the cere- computer, and a tiny office. Nevertheless. part of Celebrate Week and we have big and composers from the department final effecrs, of the pieces and a fabu- mony. which was held in Warwick on Fri- week in, week out, we produce two hours plans to branch out and redefine ourselves and has included famous natnes.The lous experience." day and Saturday. Marsh 30 and 3 I . of great TV. The fact that these obstacles in the next 12 months and hopefully win organisers aim to promote new music Last Sunday the Leeds Urnversay As well as Best Broadcaster. LS:TV have never stood in our way reflects the sonic more awards airing the way ." and put on many accessible perform- Liturgical Choir gave a concert of con- also scooped awards for. Best Light Enter- ances. temporary choral music and the win- tainment, Best Comedy, Best On-Screen The series will also appeal to con- ning piece of the Leeds Philosophical Male. Best Drama and Best Video to temporary music fans with big names and Literary Society Choral Composi- Music such as Ian Pearce. Bill Nelson and tion prize. On Wednesday. acclaimed The station was also highly commend- Nicola le Farm performing and also the contemporary pianist Ian Peirce gave a ed for the doeurneniary 'Thais and Lows'. works of Michael Spencer, Martin recital. also including a work by a stu- Episode 3. and for its news programme. Watkins. Adam Fergier and Vicki Bur- dent competition winner. 'The Essential'. rell being performed. The series continues with Joseph LS:'TV station manager lames Cooper Jillian Johnson, Concerts Adminis- Tong and Waka Hasegawa playing said! "As a station, we are all incredibly trator ail 1 Ile I III VCJ LIF Leeds. said: Music for t LL o pianos on Friday 27. and proud of out success at this year's NaS- -Many of lint years performers are legendary. guitarist Bill Nelson present- TA.s.1t certainly is a huge Warn effort and I recognised as the hest in the world. ing a film and live performance on Sat• can't think. of one member who hasn't put Most performances are free and there's urday 28. their all into ensuring that we are the hest something lo interest everyone. If you The series will end with a harpsi- student station in the country. I think we are new to contemporary music. there's chord recital including works by Louis were so successful because the spirit of our no better time to experience it than Andriesse and Bayan Nonhcou given society shows through in out work. with these amazing performances." by Chau -Yee Lo, "We are all about allowing anyone. no Friday's concert included Wasik matter what their experience. to be cre- mit Leonardo' for speakers and cham- • For more information go to ative, maxi like-minded people. and learn SUCCESS STORY: The award-winning team at LSTV ber ensemble. 'Kleines Requiem fur wwa .1e,aIs_ae.uktmusicieoncens.htm about making student TV. We're always PHOTO: Jame Morton Scientists explore new depths of the universe using new telescope

By Chris Stevenson Since 2002 the project Itaa built four telescopes in Namibia that detect gamma-rays and enable aL ientrars to 'ace celestial phenomena tar heyend A galaxy tar, tar aia ita has come a lit- the range of s'isrble light. tle hit L loser due in new research by a Dr. ion Hinton of the School of group scientist~ from around the Phyaica and Aaironomsa who plays a world. role in the research. said: "The work Is Leeds University astronomer Di, very important as it allows us to find Jim Hinton is part of the High Energy out more about very high energy phe- Stereoscopic System CHESS) group nomena in the universe. that has hecn awarded a share of the "For example the processes that (1:683,000) European Union occur in the extreme environments in Descartes: prize tar research. supernova ,hunk waves or close to The prize, which has been awarded aupermassive black holes, A part of yearly since 2000, rewards scientific this is finding out how and where in and technological excellence that our galaxy particles are accelerated to allows the European Union in compete close to the speed of light." in the fields of international research 1k added: "The HESS telescopes and %c lent i fie development. are about ten timea more sensitise than It also rewards research that previous instruments in this v cry - involves en-operation het sseen mem- high-energy gamma-ray range. ber states of the EU. This year. the "These are the highest energy pho- prize has been shared between three tons wen front i.s1.::currimieril objects groups. includine The High Energy (each with a billion times more energy Stereoscopic System tHESSI than an X-ray t so this reaearch is The HESS project ioviiIL es about itnpnrtatit and tan WO scientists from Germany, fiance. astrillio1114- as a Y1/4 hole_ the UK. Ireland, Poland. the Czech "The cram we reeds e will nioatty Repuldie, Armenia, South Africa and be spew on mirrors for the neat step in Namitara. our project tall:SS-2a which involves Their work involves building a tel- constructing a massive 27m diameter. escope system that vacs high energy telescope at the Name site in Namibia, gamma rays to construes images of the in order to further our research." galaxy that surrounds US, Gamma-ray The mune HESS also honours Vic- astronomy is that or the -non-thermal tor Heas, who discovered coarnic rays universe-, tracing the most violent and in 1912 lie was awarded the Nobel THE SKY AT NIGHT: The HESS telescope syste energetic phenomena at work in space. Prize in 1930. PHOTO: Google Irnagea

Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 4 Academic website could be the facebook for studying By Ahid Husain available to academics which helps Building the world's largest academic community. cut costs on the otherwise expensive •— business of scholarship advertising, joined? 1.'01 Are you part of it? Already, Some universities have even started '14,PM Academic Help MO Ant An Internet-based social neva orkine registering undergraduate and ► portal called Online Academic postgraduate secretaries of different P.•.110114.1 Advisor is becoMing the facebook of faculties to adS ise and attract more r•c-1.,OVVr - the academic world. students. The Online Atademic Advisor The portal hrings together Vlad Ukis, part of the Online h•∎ 11 ,;; students studying a range of subjects Acadmic Advisor team said: "The ar h from all mer the world. The goal is development of the portal is only a Welcome to the community portal for students and academics! The portal's goal academics from every subject and research to allow users to get to know one start and we are excited to enrich it 1:=1111 is to bring together students and another. socialise, make friends and with more useful features for the area worldwide to promote academic discussion and socialising. discuss academic matters of interest academic community." to them. Students at the University of A• 14..,,,Lyir a! Students can here c tan here On registration. members provide Leeds appear excited about the their subject of study, research area. portal's development Andrew Wray, =MEM • Discuss academic matters research direction as well as a a third year politics student said: • Discuss academic matters • Create their own communities personal statement to tell other users "I've just finished my dissertation ;1'.`; • Socialise • Organise conference activities about themselves. Once a member. and I think the portal could really . co-v.00010o' • Meet and make friends • Socialise users can browse through other users' help in areas like that. It's difficult Icti. • Find out about studying abroad • Meet and make friends profiles, find people v. ith similar to find people to bounce ideas off in ;I • Get rid of postgrad loneliness • Provide academic help academic and social interests. send the niche area of politics that my • Get academic help • Find new PhDs and PostDocs messages to as well as join and dissertation was about but with EZIE=1•1 • Find a scholarship • Make themselves known to them create communities of students who worldwide community it would make • Find a research supervisor share anything front a like of football life a kit easier." to an admiration of the work of He added: " I like the social RIIltister as a Student it's tree Register as an Academic It's free Friedrich Nietzsche. aspect of the site as well, It is good The unique aspect of the site is to merge academic interests with Not a student? Not an academic? But still interested? Regis-ter as a Member of that discussion is not restricted to social ones. it makes the site like a Public members in a similar geographical thinking man's version of facebook.- Polk area. Members are able to message The portal community has grown anyone across the globe so they can exponentially over the last four Free Scholarship Advertising share a 'world of academic weeks. more than doubling its Antoci More Students to Your al obre_esity fAr free experience'. Academics are also able membership. Currently it consists of to join up. share research interests 900 users. Latest Users and even teaching methods. Another It is available online at - =11L- Latest_StUdent Latest Academic at M_eMber of Public interesting aspect of the site is a free latiollwww,Onl meAcademicAd visor. ACADEMIC WEBSITE: The thinking man's facebook? scholarship advertising feature cam, PHOTO: vWvw OntineAcadernicAdmx Journalists meet to help make Healthy phone may working life better for graduates replace GP check-ups

By Irian Raja with the working world of One student attendant said: "It was By Anton Mclean have eaten and then recommend what journalism. Paul Bradshaw, the blog my first ever media related dietary or exercise changes would he editor said "the hlog will serve all conference in the UK. I think the required to offset the damage. The students, those that want to make a Union's interest in the concerns of researchers have found that patients' difference now have the opportunity students will bring more diverse A National Union of Journalists Researchers are developing a mobile well-being is significantly enhanced by to do so." young graduates to this profession." conference has introduced new phone for health that could replace the self management and believe that the measures for graduate journalism regular doctors' cheek-up. phone will negate the need for patient; students. The phone will work by interacting to make frequent trips to the doctor tar The NUJ motions included: a hid with small wireless devices such as a routine checks, and let them track their to make work experience paid and the health progress on a personalisol introduction of a web blog for student blood pressure monitor which is writers. The event saw 300 media strapped to the wrist. It w ill be able to website. However. the health phone was professionals, technical staff and 14 check blood-pressure and blood glucose students gather in Birmingham. to levels. heart rate and other vital signs given a cautious reception by the Rota] mark the centenary celebration of the visa Bluetooth connection and then College of General Practitioners National Union of Journalists. transfer the intOmiation via a remote (RCGPI. Professor Maya Lakhoni. The Union Secretary General. server directly to the owner's doctor. Chair of the RCGP told Leeds Student' Jeremy Dear, informed students of In emergency situations the phone "This mobile phone device is not A how ruthless employers can he when would automatically alert health threat to GPs as it can never he a exploiting fresh graduates tinder the professionals with a phone-call or text- substitute for a face in fa,v umbrella of work experience. which inesNIVC. consultation, However, if used carefully often involves little more than Improved living conditions and a it can support doctors in deliveringhl0 bringing tea. answering a call or better quality of life means that people standards of care and empower panda+ making a photocopy. He said: "The 1 are living much longer than by offering them another method' National Union of Journalists is the ever before. communication with their OP." first Organisation to work with Scientists estimate that by 2014, the ember of people aged 65 in the UK The project which has receisel students to produce best practice In guidelines to end the exploitation of will exceed those under I. Dr Alison funding from the New Dynamic, Programme Involves those entering the profession:- Marshall who is leading. the project says Ageing ■votth Students were given the chance to because of this. new technology researchers from the Key direct ;questions to the NUJ President, solutions that 'provide a greater level of Institute. the School of Electronic gad Secretary and other officials. The care fir patients' need to he found and Electrical Engineering, the Nutritional Union's move to come-up with a the researchers are confident that the and Epidemiology Group and tlw student blog health-phone will revolutionise the way School of Healthcare. I www. I 00yearsofn uj.word press cons we think about healthcare. A prototype phone will he tested on 10 was a popular decision with those The mobile will be so advanced that research volunteers next month who hoped it would motivate NUJ MEET: Journalists and students gather in Birmingham it will even allow its owner to check the improve its design and functionality, graduates who may feel disenchanted PHOTO. RONAN QUINLAN amounts of calories, sugar and fats they before a larger trial is held next yeiir• 5 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 V-C looks to stub out opposition

By Rachel Hunter the controversial issue being raised discourage its members from this attend she meeting in hear Arthur's 1' n iversity or Leeds. again on the agenda of the Union dangerous habit." arguments in favour of a hall. The VCs Council or on the upeorning Union The VC is due to meet students next office has confirmed he intends to Share you views and opinions with the Referenda. week for his termly question and answer engage with them on the issue, The floor V ice Chancellor and the student hotly on A motion to ban the sale of cigarettes in Hoping that the decision may be session. Timeyin has suggested in an will also be open for students as quit the May l at 4pm in the Riley Leeds University Union fell at returned to at sonic point. the VC is email that all Union Councillors shouIdld VC on their student experience at the RSVP.: 1:1SMMCNItlaleeliN.11C.Ilk Monday's Union Council meeting. offering to help the Union offset any The Vice-Chancellor Michael loss of profit from stopping the sale of Arthur, who has been lobbying for a cigarettes. moratorium since his arrival at Leeds, He said: 1 appreciate there are has expressed disappointment at the financial concerns, and so the University result. has offered to help the Union offset us He told Leeds Student: "As a medic potential loss of profits for a transitional who has witnessed the awful. painful period (50 per cent of loss in year one deaths of people with smoking-induced and 25 per cent in year two - around lung disease. I feel it's my professional 124,(XX1 in all). That offer is still there. and personal duty to take a strong suggested that LUU should ptesition against smoking." consider the issue of .selling cigarettes as Discussion at the meeting centred part of their 'Healthy Week' activities. mound Council's belief that Union Promoting the health and well-being of members should keep the right to students is a great idea. but in do that purchase cigarettes in LUU. whether whilst also making a profit from selling discontinuing the sale of cigarettes cigarettes is - in my view - inconsistent. would actually deter individuals from "I acknowledge the freedom ot' smoking and also the potential loss of choice issue. but I still believe that the revenue that might occur. resulting in a whole concept of 'health promotion' is significant impact on Union investment undermined by this very clear in student services. inconsistency in policy." Follow ing what was described ax an He added; "This is the single most 'interesting yet contentious debate' by important step the Union could take to Democracy and Communications promote health among students, and I'm Officer Dame& Timeyin, it was decided sure this debate will continue in the that the Union would not discontinue the coming months. sale of cigarettes. "Meanwhile. I very much hope that The forthcoming smoking ban, the Union puts measures in place to help which is being introduced throughout those who want to quit smoking. and SUPPLY AND DEMAND: Cigarettes on sale at LUU the University from July I. could lead to does everything in its power to PHOTO: Patrick Nixon Uni urges staff Cyclists take on 2000 to cycle to work mile charity challenge

By Laura Mackenzie up from now until 30 June 2007. By James Morris They will then travel down the members, and displays two maps. The initiative works by the coast of Spain through Barcelona and detailing the route the cyclists plan University purchasing bikes and then Valencia and into Gibraltar, taking to take. hiring them to staff for eighteen- the ferry across to Tangiers and then With £1,800 already donated, the A new cycle-to-work-scheme has month periods. Four intrepid cyclists are setting off on to the capital Rabat. level of support is clear, making been launched to encourage Monthly deductions will be made at the end of May on a 2,000 mile David added: "Friends were all them 60 per cent of the way towards university staff to lead better from staff's gross pay as a tax-free journey to Africa. surprised when we told them about their 0.000 target, lifestyles and promote healthy benefit At the end of the hire period, The quartet, consisting of Leeds our plans but have been extremely living. hirers will be able to buy their students David McCorquodale, Luke supportive as can be seen from the For more information or to make a The scheme allows staff to hire equipment at ten per cent of the Williams, Ben Stuart and Sam number of people who have already donation visit: new bicycle and safety equipment at retail value. Moore, are taking on this enormous donated". www.justgiving.corn/cycle2africa200 a discounted price and they can sign Transport co-ordinator Steffi challenge to raise money for Their Facebook group. 'Cycle to 7 or join their 'Cycle to Africa 2007' Hasse explained the reasoning Leukaemia Research. Africa 2007' already has 240 Facebook group. behind the scheme: "Cycling is the The finalists. who leave London quickest mode of transport in a city on May 29. plan to complete the over a five mile distance" She cycle unaided in just over a month. added; "Running a bike is much cycling on average between 60 to SO cheaper than a car, and its good for miles a day. Their final destination environmental air quality." will be Morocco_ Such benefits would suggest that Inspiration and choice of charity the scheme should evolve to include for the four sterns from the death of students; although many are close Luke's brother Ben as a result of enough to walk to university, there leukaemia in 1991. are others who live just outside of With dissertations looming. Leeds centre and could also training has naturally been tough fur participate-in such a scheme. the teem. who have been in the gym Students have mixed feelings over the winter months but tire now about the idea. Sara liabachi, first trying in cycle between 40 and 50 vear Politics and Philosophy student, miles a day. None of them have tried said. "unless there are proper cycle anything remotely similar before. lanes or students have had road Fur mans. such a ride would seem safety lessons then they could be at a daunting undertaking. hut David risk nn the roads.- calmly shrugs this +Le:session of. He Lucy Graham. a first tear Law said "It's a nice %N;} as end eur student said: "1 think the cycle university C pcx se uo: as well as scheme is a great idea. I don't own a (111111g our MI for ibar tiy.'. bike currently but if 1 was given a Their route takes them first to discount an equipment I would Porstmouth. then bs ferry to Si Mato definitely cycle to university rather ON YER BIKE: A new scheme is and straight thought. France ever the CHARITY CYCLE: The Leeds lads take on the challenge than get the bus." launched to encourage cycling Pyrenees. LJ Leeds Studentwvirn.lecdsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 6

Under the Radar Russia after Yeltsin: Change, Chaos and China

Russian economist inclined toward 'free market reforms.' Will Yeltsin' dream of a thriving market econom The Moscow Times con- radical reform. In January 1992. Gaidar convinced Yeltsin to introduce and a state ruled by law be achieved i siders the possibility of a program of "shock therapy" in Rus- the near future? This is an unanswer dramatic reform: "In the By Stefan Page sia. On January 2. Yeltsin. acting as able question. all that is certain o next decade, Russia his own Prime Minister. ordered the Russia's future is that it is extreme] may break up into six to liberalization of foreign trade. prices, unpredictable. eight different states" and currency. At the some time. Russia's future is a topic of specu Yeltsin followed a policy of 'macro- lation. the Moscow Times conside economic stabilization,' a harsh ouster- the possibility of dramatic reform: "I Boris Yeltsin. the former RUSSIA: dyeesiitgsnine,ds sttoabciolnitarroitimmpt the next decade. Russia may break a. President of Russia who died aged 76. into six to eight different states... Ii itint r.eUg irimdeer led Russia away from the repression of eram, interest rates %%ere raised to world history. countries that suffe Communism. but was never ro see the extremels high levels to tighten from systemic internal disorde promised land of a thriving market money and restrict credit, To bring inevitably become the victims of con economy and a state ruled by Loa. Ile state spending and revenues into bal- quest. And not even nuclear weapon took control of a Russia in disarray ance. Yeltsin raised new taxes heasi- can guarantee the territorial iniegrit. different kind of bedlam and left it in a ly. cut hack sharply on government of a country. just as a car alarms don' when he suddenly resigned on the last subsidies to industry and construction. always protect against theft. A coati day of 1999. and made steep cuts to state welfare w ithout an army is in trouble, and Rus "During his time in office too very spending. sir's army showed its true colours it different Yeltsin's etched themselves In early 1992, prices skyrocketed Chechnya: It's adept at plundering hu on the world's consciousness. There throughout Russia. and deep credit no good at fighting. In this high-tec was Yeltsin the fighter. who climbed crunch shut down many industries and age, only professional armies can ge on top of a tank in August 1991 to brought about a protracted depression. the job done: muss conscript armie raise the standard of liberty against the Many stale enterprises shut down as are as obsolete as cavalry armies we Soviet putschists oho wanted to they found themselves without orders in World War 11." (21rm .?) restore Communism" (Telegraph. or financing. The living standards of An interesting factor in Russia' 244107i much of the population were des astat- Future is its relationship with the East Just days alter the dissolution of the ed. In the 1990s Russia suffered an Whether for good or ill. Russia, as th Soviet Union, Boris Yeltsin resolved economic downturn more severe than last of the European imperial pow to embark on a program of radical eco- the United States or Germany had engaged in Asia. is in retreat. Even, nomic Morin. with the aim of restruc- undergone six decades earlier in the the "near abroad" of the former Soy turing Russia's economic system — states of Central Asia. Russia ma convertimi the ssorlits largest socialist Great Depression. planned economy into a market-ori- Russian commentators and even expect increasingly to play second lid die to the dynamism and ambitions a ented capitalist one. During early dis- some Western economists. such as China. In its relations with Chin cussions of this transition, Yeltsin's Marshall Goldman, widely blamed itself. Russia is no longer either Itt advisers debated issues of speed and Yeltsin's Western-hacked economic • sequencing. with an apparent division program for the country's disastrous dominant nor even the primary facto between those favoring a rapid economic performance in the 1990s. in Beijing's worldview. Rather, Ru approach and those favoring it gradual Many politicians began to quickly dis- sia is a useful partner to China in many or slower approach, tance themselves from the program. In aspects of its own external relation In lute 1991 Yeltsin turned to the February 1992. Russia's vice presi- and a secure hinterland in any paten advice of Western economists, and dent, Aleksandt Ruskoy denounced hal future crisis over Taiwan Of Korea Western institutions such as the IMF. the Yeltsin program as "economic For China. Russia is also a school a the World Bank. and the U.S. Treasury genocide." By 1993 conflict over the economic and social policies it regard Department. who had developed a reform direction escalated between as failures and, unfortunately, a standard policy recipe for transition Yeltttnin,csinpr:1otedussiap:rne:to7teo:erti:ntrraaleco:::icrefisin tn onesi e itdtheop r object lesson to the Chinese Comma MOSCOW. RUSSIA: The future of economies in the late1980s. This poli- in nist leadership against the rapid intro Russia seems uncertain, Stefan cy recipe came duction of multi-party democracy. Page offers an insight from the to be known as the free press. and loosening of a highly 'Yeltsin Perspective' "Washington Consensus" or "shock Sovi- therapy•' a combination of measures et privatiza- centralized system of state contro intended to liberalize prices and stabi- tion ing owne over its provinces. lize the state's budget. Such measures of shares in farmer state enterprises as had been attempted in Poland. and advocates of "shock therapy" felt the "su'ipdpeillYrtafsorp(IshissibeeleoitiCinctricearteetipir‘illisti.cIanl same could be done in Russia. Some the West, privatization was viewed as Russian poltcymakers were skeptical the key In the transition from commu- that this was the way to go, but the nism in Eastern Europe. ensuring a approach was favored by Yeltsin's quick dismantling of the Soviet-era deputy, Yegor Gaidar, a .15-sear-old planned economy to make way for

Police generate commu- Deportation to Democratic Microfinanciers target Rio de Janeiro tackling Republic of Congo Also in the news nity cohesion in Leeds HIV in Africa drug with the army 1-oothall for the under 17s has become a A 'National day of Action' prosiest o as Alicrofinance institutions are helping to Rio de burin} has seen the killing of an new project for the Neighbourhood held in Leeds amongst many other Uk fight the pandemic. AIDS, that is partic- alleged 20 gang members as the Police Policing Teams in Hyde Park. Head ingly cities - earlier this month, against ularly prevalent in sub-Saharan Africa. made an attempt to crack down on the and the surrounding area. The so-called deportations to the Democratic Repub- The financiers offer micro loans as little escalating drug trade in what is rumoured "Fair Play" project encourages 9-13 and lic of Congo. It is alleged that Home as $15, which helps communities build to be one of Brazil's most dangerous 14-17 year-olds to engage in community office created. operation Castor. saw up their own economy from a small yet cities. With rates of 50 homicides to 01* issues. The first tournament, on I lth the deportation of 38 DR Congolese, a stable base. The loans - due to their 100.0(X1 citizens, the city sees killings - April. saw Woodhouse 9-13 year-olds number that included 21 children. The small nature, have an unusually high rate especially in the notorious favellas - on a beat Tinshill. I-0. and the Little London DRC has been through a turbulent of repayment at 98 per cent. However. daily basis. The killings which happcml side win a separate penalty-kick shoot recent history with ethnic and civil HIV and AIDS are paying detriment to in the Mineira favella near the city centre. out competition. The event, which is wars in almost constant throes. which the companies as repayments are com- was a result of rival gangs from the trying sponsored by Leeds Federation Housing, has seen the recent period labelled as pleted between 65 and X6 per cent due to to gain control of drug dealing spots, was described by one Police participant. the bloodiest since World War Two. ill health, As a result of this loss Of claimed the police. President Luiz Immo PC Cryer. as the hest youth community Despite the potential for democracy in income, the MFIs are implementing edu- event by far: "It %vas well attended. well 2006. the elections were still disturbed Lula da Silva is debating whether to send cation schemes and workshops to inform with behaved arid entertaining for everyone by riots and attacks on the polling military troops into the city to deal potential borrowers about the ins and involved.- booths. the escalating violence and drug related outs of the virus. crime. Under the Radar is a weekly round-up of national and global news that hasn't hit the headlines. To get in touch with the sub editors with ..hrtrff.1.1k yr toeaoacK email Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 7 Student Politicians extra

Cottaging: the second coming Steven Smith goes down to Leeds' premier eortaging hotspot. the Parkinson Building toilets, to rev isit and further expose Leeds' anonymous gay sex scene.

12 Student Parents

There are Mose students whilst- lives are .t little more complicated than having just to juggle their coursework and that l,Ith pint. James lIaddon meets with the students who balance their courses and their children.

LEEDS CIVIC HALL: Can a lowly Leeds student make it into the corridors at power? ny student worth their weight the responsibility of actually running 'rainbow coalition'. "I think it has in erroneous three AM take- the city of Leeds, And yes. I did check, worked very well There's been a visi- aways will know the golden they arc real students. ble change in road repairs in Leeds. a rule: we do not talk about the real Yet neither candidate appeared greater police presence on the streets world. 11 we oceasionally stray and remotely intimidated by the prospect and response times have shot up. But mention this nightmarish realm. a stu- of life outside of Studentville, when as you alway s get with coalitions there dent's tone IN to he light. airy., humor- met up w ith them this week, Conserva- has to he some horse-trading and com- Political ous and very suggestive of the fact that tive Chris Wales proclaimed confi- promise. A single ruling party in power said 'Real World' does not actually dently. "Students can absolutely fulfil would bring about more radical exist. But there's had news. Some of the role. Being a councillor is about change. The Conservatives, Lih Denis our own have taken the plunge into the addressing people's concerns and lis- and Greens arc certainly strange bed- murky depths of reality and this tening to them- Labour Dania! Adity- fellow s • it's like sticking Margaret reporter fears for their safety. Have pour seemed equally ready to take on Thatcher. Charles Kennedy and a pastures you seen Danial Adilypour or Chris she task. saying. "I would relish the sprout into bed." Brilliant. Wales'? Stay away. children, stay opportunity. if elected. to change It is, of course. unsurprising that -a away. They have burst their own stu- things in Leeds.- Change is a big word Conservative believes that the current dent bubbles and might just try and and is often bandied about by politicos administration has been a success, But burst yours. inure often than it is achieved. Howev- does Chris have ideas for she future' On Thursday May 3, one third of er. both Mr Adilypour and Mr Wales "I'm standing to put students at the Leeds City Council goes up for elec- seem to have sonic substantial ideas to front of the agenda in Headingiey." An new tion. It is currently run by a 'rainbow hack up their campaigns. admirable policy, to be Sidle. but does coalition' of Conservatives. Liberal Dania' says. "We've said. if elected Chris think that heing a student. and The cosy confines of Leeds Civic Democrats and Greens (see table on in Leeds, Labour will provide all over- standing in a student area, with his cen- page 9). Mr Adilypour and Mr Wales 80s with free homecare. I'm disgusted tral policy being greater representation Hall are under threat. There are have seen fit to enter the contest and at the way the current Council have for students, might pat him in some challenge the incumbent councillors in treated the elderly. Since they came to small danger of being a single issue students on the loose. Dania! two wards. Daniai Adily pour is the power. over 1,700 elderly eiti,zens in candidate?"Representation is t'hvious- Labour candidate for Harewood and Leeds have had their homecare taken iy a very big issue. But that isn't all I Adilypour and Chris Wales talk to Chris Wales is the Conservative candi- away from them. I've seen spending stand for. 1 think that go ‘-ernmenr date for Headingley. That's right, not cuts, a decline in public-services and needs to be more transparent. I don't Jessica Parker about their fight to only are these two crazies trying to get want to do something about it.- Shock think 'natty people actually know what serious jobs before they're even done of all horrors. Chris has a more posi- the difference is between local become Leeds City Councillors. being a student but jobs that give them tive verdict for the performance of the government and national govern-

7 Leeds Student www.leesstudent.org.uk Friday, Alwil 27, 200 8 Student Politicians

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114 LeedS Unive(sifQ Union

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PHOTO: STEVE SMITH ADILYPOUR: Dares name appears first on the Harewood ballot sheet. An advantage that secures, on WALES: Not actually Welsh but Leeds born and bred. average, a extra 150 votes. Pl-C-Tri! JOHN PUODEPI-tATT alum- --emon merit: what 'heir powers are and try. Now who can say that Leeds City you can connect a ith people and are •- what they can do for us, I'd like to Council isn t a broad church?) Does prepared to fight for them. And the Chris (right): Dania) (left).• see a system where local councillors Chris think that he can take on the likes response has been fairly positive. I ran posted daily On the Internet about what of Mr Monaghan ( who. in his own Iasi year and sent out some information they're doing. And there are social humble words concedes that, as a asking people if they'd be prepared to "The "I'm looking for issues, like the usage of land. the need councillor. "1 have achieved a Ion or. vote for a student and something like for more community facilities and rids- does Chris believe that he's just anoth- three quarters said yrs. And those Conservatives, every vote. And ing education standards for poorer er student hieing set up for a 'paper can- responses were more from residents of families." didacy" -Conservatives.' have the high- your blue rinse brigade and old age Lib Dems and _ Labour values So both Danial and Chris seem rut-- est number of student councillors in the pensioners.- are as valid in ing to go hut. do either actually have a country. And in Headingley we were Chris Wales is of course running in Greens are chance of winning in their respective I,700 votes behind the Liberal Democ- an area with a heavy student popula- certainly strange the suburbs as wards? Danial's ward of Harewood is rats but that was slashed down to 70(1 tion - often said to explain Lib Dem currently run by three Conservative overnight. 700 votes is not a big grab. dominance in the ward. Popularly per- bed-fellows it's they are in the councillors who have a very strong The big problem in Headingley is voter ceived as the student party. the Liberal base of support in the area. Student apathy. In any other ward 700 votes Democrats might be hard to push out in like inner-cities. candidates are often nominated to run would he a party clinging on. But even such a student-orientated ward. But There are Labour in seats in which there is little or no with voter apathy, higher in Heading- Chris thinks that the Conservatives sticking chance of victory. Does Danial think ley than in most areas of the city, I still might he about to steal the student voters every- he can beat the incumbent Councillor think that everybody's in with a win- faithful from the yellows. "I don't Margaret Rachael Proctor or. is his a mere 'paper ning chance. So I wouldn't go so fur as think the Liberal Democrats are the Thatcher, where and they candidacy'? "Not at all. I'm looking to call it a paper candidacy.- student party as such. That's a very for every vote. And Labour values are Chris and Danial's optimism is cer- recent development. If you look at it Charles Kennedy deserve repre- as valid in the suburbs as they are in tainly inspiring and impressive, but historically, students generally back sentation." the inner-cities. There are Labour vot- will the people of Leeds take these two the most progressive force. When Mrs and a sprout into crs everywhere and they deserve repre- as seriously as they take themselves? Thatcher came and was seen as a sentation." Dania) believes they will. "I've had a dynamic. progressive force, a whole bed." positive feedback on the doorstep. Pen- Headingley is run by three Liberal chunk of her votes came from students. Democrat Councillors. Chris is run- pie seem pleased to see a fresh face and Same with Mr Blair in the early 90s - hear new ideas. Chris doesn't think ning against James Monaghan this he offered radical change. that looked that people will just see him as a stu- year. (Mr Monaghan, previous to his very good on paper, and students dent. "It's not about your age or cir- occupation as a councillor, found some flocked to Labour. The way the Con- measure of success in the porn Indus- cumstances in life. it's about whether servative party is moving at the minute

Leeds Student www.leedsstudentorg•uk Friday, April 27, 2007 9 Student Politicians Extra will mean that it becomes a lot more Interestingly. current Headingley positive effect on the local communi- attractive, if 1t hasn't already. to the councillor. James Monaghan, believes ty. Look at RAG. kink at ACTION The figures - student vote." that student-councillor ties are strong, there are groups that go out and actu- Dania' reminds us some of what his "I have worked closely with the Stu- ally do something. This isn't all about Leeds city council, 2006-07 party have done for students. "Labour dent Unions cif Leeds Met and Leeds giving students what they want. but introduced the minimum wage, which University to establish a student forum empowering therti to make a positive really helps those students who work to discuss issues that affect students difference in the community." Danial pan-lime jobs. And twenty years ago a living in the LS6 area. The agenda is agrees that there is a need to break nut Labour 40 university education was the pursuit of set by students and the ideas and com- of the usual political student forums. the wealthy elite. Thanks to Labour. ments that come out of ihe forum are "There often seems to he the attitude anyone who wants to eau now go 10 fed into official council channels to that polities outside of campus is old% Liberal Democrat 25 university. If it wasn't for Labour. I help formulate the council's strategy." the stomping ground of the middle- wouldn't be at university." To put Mr Monaghan's assertion to aged. We need to show that this isn't Many may. at this point. may be the test, Chris asks. "Outside of the the case." Conservative 24 tempted to cough the word, "Top-Up political 'elite' on campus. could any- Poi-holes, littered parks and rub- Fees". With the Liberal Democrats one actually even name ho their three bish collection may T10( be as glam- seen as the main any opposed to Top- councillors are?" (Can you?) "The MMIS to discuss as far-away wars. but Morley Borough Up Fees. can either party deny the stu- councillors are being paid twelve thou- it is important to gain a sense of. dare dent-Lib Dem connection? Danial sand a year to enfranchise all their vot- I say it, reality here. An Americiu Independents 4 remarks, "It annoys me that the Liberal ers. But they're not talking to the stu- politician once. said. "All polities Democrats present themselves as the dents." local". Whilst he clearly never attend- 'anti-tuition fee party' yet they were I can't help thinking that there ed Leeds University Union Council Green 3 more than happy to introduce the Grad- might be a reason why we can't name t wise choice). we might do well to lis- uate Endowment Tax in Scotland , our councillors (apart from any possi- ten to his advice. Though it is the stu- which is effectively tuition tees by ble lack of effort on either side). Often dent's golden rule never to mention Independent 2 another name." The Graduate Endow- belittled as being merely the people in the real world. secretly and silently ment Tax requires Scottish Students to charge of rubbish collection, pot-holes crossing a box (or violently defiling pay a sum of £2. I-15. possibly more, and getting cats out of trees, does your ballot paper. if you so wish) BNP once the h.o.c Iinished university and either of our students feel that their doesn't, if you think about it. break are earning over E10.00,0 a year. prospective occupation is simply a this commandment. As for Liberal Democrat loyalty to matter of lording it over hin-men? students on a more local basis. Chris is Dan al reminds me, "The ciirrent sceptical. "Having been round Headin- administration has been pos‘erful gley and followed some of the local enough to take homecare provisions LEEDS • LONDON • MANCHESTER Liberal Democrat Councillors, l have from our elderly. And if you're on the to say. they spend a tot of time sitting door-step, it's issues like pot-holes and • in obscure- residents meetings blocking rubbish collection that concern peo- planning permission and talktng about ple." how they'd like to get students out of Chris is of a similar mind. -Whilst Danial agrees, "The Lib Leeds City Council isn't going to he w School, Dents. from what I have seen, seem to declaring the next (glad t 41 hear it be hostile to the student presence in - although conquering Sheffield could Headingley and Hyde Park and Wood- potentially he fun). "or putting forward ing you for practice \ house." radical education policies. measures Chris Wales is disappointed in the like becoming a tern waste city is a lack of contact between students and fantastic step forward that makes a their councillors. "I've never seen the very big impact on a lot of local peo- councillors here talking to the Exec, ple.' coming and supporting our campaigns Dania' is less impressed with the or talking to us about our needs and Council's performance on the environ- concerns." The Labour candidate for ment. "I'm very unhappy about the Headingley and former Leeds Univer- plans to introduce the incinerator. It's sity student. Katherine Mitchell. agrees environmentally unfriendly: and hypo- that some of the current councillors critical that the Greens on the Council base tailed to reach out to young peo- are happy to see it built. Instead of ple. "I believe most young people are focussing on burning rubbish and pol- interested in politics but politicians in luting our environment in the process, General are unrepresentative and they should provide a decent 11'W:it! dis- remote from the people they repre- posal service and invest more sent." resources in recycling. And the current Hyde Park and Woodhouse Lib Dent up for re-election tried. not long ago. to tarmac over some of Hyde Park and and turn it into a car park." Surprised at "NUS this, I looked into Mr Adilmlours FULL-TIME • PART-TIME • DISTANCE LEARNING bodies within claim and it does indeed seem that Councillor Raheer Hussain did once the Union can support plans to tarmac over the Monu- As a leading provider of professional legal education ment Moor section of Hyde Park. BPP offers: appear to be Councillor Hussain stated at the time, "(The car park] will he really nice with ▪ , . ant. the only outlet shrubs and trees surrounding it". Car Jr...ie. L. .1 -4'f-, .2KI parks with shrubs and trees are always for students. nice to cook up a BBQ in, it's true. The morel talk.to Cranial and Chris, Places where the more apparent it becomes that the two are extremely welt-informed and we spend more than capable candidates. Having :. met the odd councillor in my time. I

three hours can say with total sincerity that these ▪ p.ti t •hrik_ two are no less impressive (if not more talking about a so) than their prospective colleagues. However. l tart curious about why wall going neither of these two political anoraks "BPP's Careers Service was invaluable and helped me secure have taken the more conventional a training contract before I even started the GOL" around Israel. Course of climbing up the greasy Union Council and NUS ladder Chris Roth Stone. fomler GDL and LPC Student They achieve observes. "NUS and bodies within the Student Union can appear to he the two-thirds to only outlet for students. Places where To find out more about how BPP can help you start your we spend three hours talking about a career in law: Tel: 0845 078 0932 three-fifths of wall going around Israel. They achieve Email: lawadmissions©bpp.com Web: www.bpp.com/law two-thirds to three-fifths of nothing. LAW SCHOOL nothing." We can actually have a fantastically ww.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 Leeds Student w 10 Cottaging Cottager's coming for sex in the Last year Leeds Student reported that gay men were meeting up Parkinson Building toilets. LS returns to the underground cottaging hot spot and finds it's being used more than ever by men from all backgrounds, including students. After investigating the goings on 12 months ago, reports.

that I had rebutted and 'wank hand' This experience 1, ;Ad is from Annie). A buried secrets. Leading to the suspect toilets and took a cubicle not unique. the shadows that I had ignored. Such a cold Returning cm dinerent dayi medium build. 5'8" 14- Investigation. I told of how men would close to the corner. Sitting, perhaps shoulder made him resort to passing mapping the times thmughout the d year-old. he feels lonely meet up for regular lunchtime liaisons suspiciously with my trousers tip. I soon z.. notes. Written in fountain pen - which I've seen urinal masturbation, couples and is easily hurt. James and use the sell-drilled spy holes to peer had occupants in bodi adjoining stalls. the man had bought along. I presume. performing oral sex, fingering under on the other hand is 20 at other, perhaps unsuspecting. users. The usual hathnxtin quiet - a feature of with the sole intention of writing on cubicles and couples meeting up, and a student in Leeds. A But. Paul. James and Guy are pun of a male etiquette - was, as ever. spoilt by lilt toilet paper - the man, who turned out to depart to continue elsewhere., pslender 5"9' he is concerned about his vastly increased number of 'conagers' the sound of both men masturbating to be years my elder. slipped the first about everything except full sex. though hygiene and enjoys the theatre. Guy is who use the Parkinson building. The loudly, as required by cottaging sheet of shabby paper under the 1 have seen the odd used candorn.Tlicre front Leeds ('try Centre. A stocky. 6'2" toilets now play host to a lull timetable etiquette. When a non-cottager. or even are frequently the sticky remnants of the 32-year-old. he notes his good looks of activity. Weekdays begin la WI a 9am a new cottager, entered the room, a partition. "You want me to toss you off? Or climax of a session on the floor and and chest hair. Although these men may rush and manage a steady flow through relative peace descended. though this cubicles often reek of semen. seem unconnected, they share a secret the afternoon, sometimes achieving a was soon disrupted by stray feet suck it off?" was scrawled onto the lack of hidden life which plays out on Leeds double figure of punters at lunch time. suggestively infnnging on the space tissue. Within 10 minutes. my Within a year. cottages have Malt University's campus. Over the weekend. the deserted toilet under the partition. Men constantly reply prompted a second note: "I could inroads away from the Parkinson toilet; Paul. James and Guy have all met becOmes a safe beat on for organised approached the end cubicle, trying the lick yolir ass+halls while you toss off." and further into campus. Squirt petals with other men in the Parkinson meets, free from the weekday fear of door in hope of a face•o•face Taking this as my cue to leave. I stood its users to the Worsely building, whist building toilets for sex. They have unsuspecting bystanders. experience. up, oblivious at first to a man's face has a hole looking out over the urinals shared their tales online at the websoe In seeking to establish if anything Having covered up the spy hole appearing under the partition. I quickly and says the E.C. Stoner and thy squin.org and solicited further acts with had changed since I last went there. I hidden under the toilet roll dispenser to left the cubicle. only to he met by three Edward Boyle library - a sae only many others. That such men frequent took a trip to the Parkinson's basement the right I remained anon) mous to my men, who were lingering at the wash accessible by students - have spy holes campus is not floss. A year ago. Leeds conveniences once more. Escaping the neighbouring admirer. His intentions hand basins pretending to he soaping looking over the urinals in at lean tut) Student shared the Parkinson buildings' mid-lecture hustle above, I went down had been made plain tN nh foot advances and rinsing, leering at me as I left. sets of men's toilets. Even the Union

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EVIDENCE: The pieces of tissue scrawled with offers of sex which were passed to Steve while he was investigating squirt. , it seems the practice of meeting men for sex is on the increase. the cottaging scene at Leeds Uni. Wirth almost 1,400 subscribers to cottaging Site

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Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 11 Cottaging building has more recently been the posts on Leeds-related sections has cruising spot since 31-year-old Ian myself while in the area, The topic of online discussion: the toilets by increased from an approximate 80. to Webster was strangled. stripped naked encounter summed up the cottager's the Oxfam shop arc quiet and accessible several regularly passing the 100 mark. and dumped in a river whilst meeting constant yet equal fears of assault and He said my to all, In fuel, it's been said that about It's perhaps unique that such a mass of men Mere for sex. His murderer was the law. six years ago a man was caught drilling illegal activity isn't more secure, alleged to have. lured him to the spot There's no doubt that the cottaging question "pre a hole between cubicles in the Old Bar Anyone can quickly sign up for under the pretence of being a fellow- phenomenon is increasing both on toilers. prompting the installation of 'eonaging' website and within minutes cottager. campus and elsewhere in the city-. supposes that metal cladding. A quick lix perhaps. yet seek out local hotspots and discover the Visting the area. which Is where Whether a problem to he eradaated or even today a spy hole still exists below lime and location of meetings. tourists and families park their cars and symptom of a societal cottaging is a that sheeting. When I asked Doyle hoe the have picnics by the Leeds Industrial mieunderetanding. it is illegal and is University might combat the practice, Museum, the debris from years of seriously dangerous to participante and problem rather ettaging is the pursuit of, he said that my question supposes activity is immediately apparent. communities alike. Doyle's commend often anonymous, that cottaging is a prohlem rather than a Welkin a wellenalden mud path about it being a result of homophobia than a homosexual encounters in symptom of the ~w ider problem of approached the thick. battered tree line. may ring true: After all. why else would public lavatories. This. homophobia and heterosexism". He Inside exists an underworld of coven sex with strangers be so symptom of the predominantly British noted that the health risks are no more debauchery and urges. represented by prevalent among gay men? Yet slang term stems from the than sex in a bed unless multiple the carpet of condoms. tissues and avoiding the stigma of being openly gay wider problem Cwider definition of eruisine. which partners are used. and added that lubricant packets littering the floor, exposes cortagers to other risks includes the same acts, committed threesomes and the like are not specific Men of all ages, from the overweight to associated with advertising oneself outside, usually in woods and parks. to the cotagging community, But to talk the superbly huff walk in circles. online. Moreover, the health risks of homophobia People convicted for taking part are only of the risks to sexual health magnetised by hedonistic grouptnes tame the communities which play arrested under public indecency laws, ignores more serious health risks: those which involve anything from mutual unwitting hosts to cottaging are and but this walks a somewhat bizarre legal presented by homophobic vigilantes. masturbation. to mass orgies. Armley manifold. line: unless you're caught doing it. it's A recent post from 'squirt's' Mills harbours cruisers day and night After being greeted with such a heterosexism" not illegal. For this reason. conaeing is 'Armley Mills' listing notes a recent but retains a facade of friendliness frank warning from the middle-aged a very hard thine to police. And that's spate of Asian gang attacks on cruiser!.. unfound in toilets, An older cottager noon in Arntley Mills. 1 creep hack something that the authorities at Leeds Armley mills, located behind Kirkstall's warned me :igainst leaving Inv ear in my car as dusk approaches and swiftly University have been grappling with Vile Cinema has been a notorious the ear park and that I should 'watch drive ire ay. since tindine out about the wings on. In a statement. a spokeperson told €3 0 0 Browse Listing Details Leeds Student: "Like any oreanisation which has premises that are accessible A http.//www.squirt.org/cruisingicruising_detailsasp 4 1 A to the public. and indeed any university. we are striving to get the balatie`e right 02 Horde Log in Apple _Mac Amazon allay News v YAhoo! between having an appropriate level of security presence around the campus Browse Listing Details and respecting people's privacy in using toilet and other facilities, "We want to provide a safe and welt:online environment for the (I tousauds of students. staff and visitors to the University. With this hi mind. MEMBER MESSAGE ONLINE SQUIRT milers - as with all parts of campus - CRUISING are regularly checked_ riot. just by PROFILES BOARDS R HORNY CINEMA security. but also by cleaning staff and porters. Over the past year. we have (any Email I my Membership I my Profiles Recently viewed by I. Buddies & Ignore seen a reduction in the number of reports of cottaging and inappropriate behaviour and also in the number of ni) Saved Searches) people challenged about such incidents. However. a is important that we keep You are logged in as_liarioorY You nave(I new emails. this issue in perspective. The University is one of over 50 mimed cottaging sites in central Leeds on (free members sear& submit a listing .1 * fan club members search squirtorg, the others including shopping centres. restaurants and a range of other oreanisations. "As a response to Lertb. Student highlighting this issue. we have decided browse listing details read comments to increase patrols as a precautionary measure. If anyone does feel view Leeds Members listings I v lew Leeds message boards I view Leeds Members Online uncomfOnahle about an approach or the. behaviour of others. then we would ask Add to my list of favourite CrUIsind soots that they report this to University security. We will also examine whether there are any ways in which we can Leeds University, Parkinson Building take account of this issue in planning You can link to this cruising at: http://www.squirtorgiCruisingf7359 future refurbishments- or the design of new buildings " Photos of this location: Yet the intrastmeture of squirt and other websites. envelops an Fan Club Fan Club Fan Club Fan Club Fan Club underground community. evolving with changing situations. And an increase in Member Members Member Members Members website traffic between the 1,4410 squin members is- a sign of increased ONLY * ONLY * ONLY * ONLY * ONLY * cottaging. this- Paul Doyle of MESMAC la regional sexual health organization Map of this location: for Guy and Bisexual meal describes a — - — different climate: "The conaeing scene City: Leeds in Leeds has dwindled to a few areas in recent years mainly because of new and Address: Parkinson Building. Woodhouse Lane emerging rechnoingies." The installation of security cameras Neighborhood: and police enickdowns might deter people for a period, but in my personal Nearest Cross experience, It dove link to deter the Street: ()mting problem, Moreover. it seems that there are Map Link: , view more cottager'. than ever. At_cordirig to news site -hidden .sexteda3`. 1hr most How to get there; Buses 1, 56, X84. X85, 85. 96, 96A. 97. 97A, 731, 752 from the city centre sup tEK .centric cm ism e website Parkinson Building. A visitors' car park. near the Parkinson Building (via Main Entrance `cruisingforsex.com' hes two 5110.000 Cavendish Road Barrier on Woodhouse Lane) is available after lOam Charge )2.50. members. sueeesting that 10 pet cent of hr mosexuals in Britain ate free after 5pm and Saturdays for previews and special events. Enter the building thrnual-i experimenting with anonymou‘, sex. the side door (to the left ipt the steps, ills a wooden door). Do not go up the stairs, but Within the year of our last investigation fellow that eione in the men's. tniteh: in to the campus cotteging scene. at SQUIRT: It's on squirtorg. shown above, that cottagers can find out about what's going on and with who in the Parkinson Building toilets. After their least three more locations have rendezvous, men sometimes post recollections of their time there on the site's discussion boards. appeared and the average number of Friday, April 27, Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk 2007 12 Student Parents Auk Creche course Some students have the challenge of juggling a degree with raising a child - how many are at Leeds? No-one's sure. How can the University contact them? They can't. meets with members of the newly-formed Student Parent Assembly to find out more.

- While Leeds Siobhan explains, in as offhand recently that the couldn't go hack. If I hadn't heen so stubborn I a house in Middleton.- and it is 4ytiiy University offers more family manner. "I had to drop out a .seco id attention they need is beginning to be nd would not he here at Leeds." No-one is certain how many residences than any other UK time because the LEA messed up no explains Siobhan. recently students with children attend Leeds given. Siobhan Gallagher was fees," While chance has plased spurred by her own experiences to university. there is still a ridiculous elected as one of the two University. There arc about 2U0 shortage and an extremely long considerable part in her misfortunes, become involved with - and to help chairpersons of the Student Parent international students registered with waiting list. They provide 160 tanoly Sioblian's case serves to show that run - the Student Parent Assembly. Assembly. "I had to defer for a year families here hut. beyond that. it is residencies. but many people are still the current preparations do nor LIN simply a question of guesswork. "Before Middleton. I was at Bolton because there w no available forced into the private sector which. always work, and are nor sufficient. Having to balance university work Institute, living with Alex's dad, housing. and we ended up living with as a profit-driven area of the market. -Sometimes I think I am a terrible with the responsibilities of looking where I fell pregnant. There was no an alcoholic for six months, in an is considerably more expensive. mother tor just being here and environment completely unsuited to a after a family means that it is often lamtly accommodation there." she Without an accurate figure for the putting her through all this," she easy to feel alienated - even ignored explains, "We lived in halls and child. before eventually being offered number of student parents at Leeds. confesses. "It isn't exactly the kind nf it is difficult to assess the scale of the childhood I thought my omit, problem this presents - all that can be would have. I spent the whole of my deduced here is that more vulnerable childhood dreaming of prince people want the University's help charming and a white wedding, 14 Leeds University Union than they can provide for. "We live children and a dog on a rug by the in Unipol aecornmodation now. and fire we can't even afford a dog. If mice and silverfish arc common nothing else. I guess this should he Student Trustees problems It's a rough area.• she good advert for contraception,- she concede.. "There's quite a hit of adds, with a bleakly ironic turn of crime. especially car crime. But tt's phrase. "Alex was a total accident we actually the nicest place I've lived were both unprepared for," since I was 19! I've been here for As harsh a situation as it can be, four years now ." !laving a child to look after has an understandably severe impact on the university experience, especially as a single mother. Arriving (TOM Manchester. Siobhan knew no-one in "You've already Leeds and while she joined a few clubs and societies, she was never been up since able to attend meeting's. Without an established support network like the six o'clock, ones being established now, creating Leeds University Union is changing, improving, connections with people in similar you've had to growing. We're now looking for four student,. situations was difficult. "I have some get your kid to ioin our brand new Board of Trustees. to amazing friends here now but it is hard to meet people and socialise dressed and -2,Liide our future growth. when you have a family. especially as a single parent. I've met most of sort them out, Our vision is to become the most effective my friends through voluntary jobs, nothing to do with the University." and that's Students' Union in the UK and we see the But her reaction is positive, and her Trustees as critical to achieving this goal. view of other people's willingness to before we've You'll be sensitive to what makes us unique: accommodate the unique challenges our focus on meeting members' needs and of parenthood seems to veer - for the even got most part - towards a cautious aspirations, our values, our commercial optimism. '1n my first year here there ourselves success with all profits reinvested in our was nothing for student parents." she services, and our deterrnination to remain explains. "I've seen quite a few ready. You've student led. If you can think strategically; improvements over the last three years. including the Student Parent can challenge, support and encourage got to pass a Network, and some clubs and others; and can work at the highest level societies changing their timetables.• degree at - we want to hear from you. People's reactions aren't always positive, though, and Siobhan makes university, and this vividly clear. "I remember the guy at the Middleton housing office go home and really well. He talked down to me complete is scum. Alex was sort somebody lathhibekeroe ue t ftlhoeo6 tsnr o nf at l(te bo ne erodveafirgilnvdg warouaaraosv aund else out for every opportunity: the house just wasn't fit tea, and bath, Find out more about this unique to move into After we'd left his and bed, then opportunity by going to office, I remember asking him if he had kids. he said 'yes' and I asked wwvvJuuonline.com/trustees or him if he'd think it was okay for his you've got your phoning 0113 3801 207 (24hrs) toddler to move into a house like for on information pack that. His reply was 'No, but I have a own work to do job'," "I dropped out of Uni the first after that." time because 1 spent nine months throwing up, pregnant with Alex," Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday. April 27, 2007 13 Student Parents .xtra

Siobhan's case is by no means you've been in our shoes, you can't kid dressed and sort them out, and the street with screaming brats and representative of all students who really understand," she concedes, "I that's before we've even got think 'Oh my God, control your attend university with children. mean. I'm not comparing it to a ourselves ready. You don't child!' and it's just natural to look Meeting with a handful of mothers physical disability but when you'd understand what goes into actually All that can be and think like that, but it hits you out on the Terrace, enjoying a coffee meet someone with one you'd agree getting here. and then you've got to more when it's you who's got that and seemingly oblivious to the that 'yes, they do need extra support'. pass a degree at university. and go deduced here child,- Jenny picks out the occasional blustery conditions, I got a far more We don't have anything you can home and sort somebody else out for negative reaction she's received cheerful portrayal of parenthood. actually physically see when we're in tea, and bath, and bed. then you've is that more when she's had to take time off to Joining the group. I could have been University but we are still restricted." got your own work to do after that. look alter her children as a problem. sitting at any mothers' meeting in the She and her friends are at pains to We actually do a lot during the day. vulnerable blaming it on a simple lack of world: discussing crafts at the creche. draw attention to the investment in and I just feel like some people are understanding. "I put my youngest in complaints of early mornings and the time they have to give, not just in not very understanding of that. I've people want nursery three months ago and he's extended family, catching up on the spending time with their children, but had problems in the past with people never had a week where he's not had gossip. What I expected. I don't in everyday activities. "li always - little. nasty comments they make." the University's a cold. There's always something know - either the melodramatic. takes so much longer to do anything I ask them about difficulties going around nursery. Hut nobody tragic figures reported in the papers with a child," she explains, while they've faced in people's attitudes. or help than they believes me if I take a day off Uni, whenever there's a slow news day, or describing the difficulty found in the way they've been treated, and because he's ill, and then take matronly characters whose physically getting to university each they give me a few examples. "Well. can provide for. another off a week later - they just appearance and mannerisms simply day. "You've already been up since it's understandable." Lindsay say 'you're using it as an excuse' six o'clock, you've had to get your explains. "I look at other people in really, he's just ill all the time because he's at nursery.. They're just building their immune systems!" LUU's Women's Officer. Sarah Way man, has had an instrumental "Being a role in encouraging the Student Parent Assembly. recognising a student mum number of the problems the group bus identified - most notably:. the you're in this lack of information on the numbers of student parents at Leeds. "All sort of limbo these efforts at the moment are just stabs in the dark. When you're Irvine between - well, to organise 'vents, or a support network, and you've no idea of you've got yore_ numbers or contact detatls. it makes it a vicious circle where you don't student friends reach people. they don't know what services you offer and the services who have don't get used enough." Changes to include this- information as part of the absolutely no initial registration process are underway, and are likely to he ready idea what for September 2007. With more everyday life is access to this, the University will he able to engage more fully with student parents. like for you, Way man also highlights the who've got very important issue of the Union's attitude towards students with different children, believing that there is already a change towards making priorities" student parents realise they're welcome in the Union and that their children are welcome. too. She illustrates the point with the example of the Terrace. "Every time they do it, they get a different response from exude motherhood. Instead. I was a member of bar staff as to whether presented with a oroup of people who their children can be there, what time simply seemed like students — their children must leave. where their overworked, perhaps. and certainly children can sit - we're trying to be busy. but still students. inclusive, but some student parents Approaching Jenny, mother of two don't even know whether their - one nine months old, the other two children are allowed through the years - I asked her what it was like. front door." "It's weird." she replied. "Being a Detailing the Union's plans for the student mum you're in this sort of future, she concentrates on the limbo between - well, you've got possible expansion of the nursery. your student friends who have and of the hopeful addition of new. absolutely no idea what everyday life different types of play schemes. "One is like [or you. who've got very thing I'd really like to do," she different priorities - but. on the other replies. "is develop student parent hand, you've got stay-at-home mums. give-it-a-go sessions. That's what I married. had children later. and think would be great: when you get they 're able to do extra things with to Freshers, there arc loads of family the kids and you don't fit in with friendly activities you don't need to them. either. When you go out with ask 'can my child come along?' for. I them, I just feel really sort of - bad, think it would give the message that in a way. I don't come home and we're really aware of the issues, and bake buns, or send them to nursery we want to make sure their with hand-knitted scarves." Her experience is brilliant." With the friend. Lindsay - mother of a little Student Parent Assembly having been Girl - interjects. "It's lonely as well. launched this year. it seems likely different if you're not living with that developments will be made, and other students. I'm the only adult in 2008 is already: being jokingly my house a hit of the time - it's just dubbed "Year of the Student Parent" not the same. It is a lovely thing to by its organisers, "It's been for too long that officers of the University, do, it's just hard." Jenny, having become a part of the 01 of the nursery. have been having to Student Parent Assembly. sees its second-guess what parents want," role an important one. "We are a Wayman admits, "Now we have a group that can say 'this is what we minority and we do need extra support. But some people don't BRIGHT: The attractive yelow exterior of the Bright Beginnings daycare earth's. PHOTO: JOHN PUDDE-PHATI- want' and which we can respond to." necessarily agree that we do. Unless 14 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 Opinion Comments expressed here are not necessarily the views of Leeds Student Calm in the Somali storm

After Ethiopian and Somali government troops managed to reclaim the capital of Somalia last December, many had high hopes for the future of the country. • --, - tairocis takes a look at why such hopes were in vain.

Sam Francis omalta hits the news in waves. towards Mogadishu. With vital hacking whose success is unparalleled in the meat calls the Islamic Courts Union "ter- ( hie major story broke in the sum- ftann the Ethiopian government. includ- south. wrists": the Courts Union responds by Smer when the Islamic Courts took ing troops, heavy weapons and air sup- Nevertheless, this fledgling govern- saying "Somalia is under Ethiopian over the capital. Mogadishu. and another port, the government took control of the ment's quest for international recogni- occupation". Things do not look gond for in December when the government's capital uud the country's third city. tion has so far been fruitless. With such the transitional government: it needs the troops took it. The press speak in terms Kismayu. recognition would come the security of Ethiopians if it is to survive, but the of "warlords"."tslamists". anarchy and a Somalia's second city, however. is a proper diplomatic relations and other longer they stay. the more resentment new opening in the American "war on different story. 1-largeisa, in the north. benefits. including international aid. will build against this foreign-backed terror". now serves as the capital of the Republic However. the inequitable distribution of government. Many. myself included. had high of Somaliland, which was proclaimed in aid has in the past been a source of con- Despite all this. there is some hope for (topes for the (inure when Ethiopian and 1991 after Barre resigned and fled. The flict rather than prosperity: It has been the south. The government is in negotia- Somali government troops finally took new country was based within the old said that although Somalis will tolerate tions with clan leaders and warlords who control of the capital in just one week in boundaries of the British colony of any hardship, they will not accept injus- might he able to help restore it to power. December- However, link progress has Somaliland. but a government took tice, Al Jaieera reports of local militias in been made towards peace in the south of shape which was based on local tradi- The "transitional charter" of the gov- some areas who might form the basis for the country around Mogadishu: recent tions and clan elders, rather than on colo- ernment in the south. however. declares a new police force. Foreign support, fighting has kit hundreds dead and nial infrastructure us is the usual case in its commitment to a unified Somalia:• from the Ethiopia and possibly the US, is cc almost half a million have fled the city. Africa. Complete with two chambers to they hope that Somaliland will he available. but whether that would help or Since the fall of Siad Barre in 1991, parliament and a council of clan elders). amenable to reinstating a federal Soma- hinder in the long-term is debatable. It has been said various factions have wrestled for con- the government is fully Functional and lia. However. it is doubtful that Sorna- The success story in Somalia is the that although trol of the countrs . Thc capital in particu- democratic. with regular and fair elec- Wanders will want m he governed from part that has left it. Somaliland is peace- lar had been carved up by various 'war- tions. Mogadishu again, after the experience of ful and democratic, and yet it receives lit- Somalis will lords' until the militia of the Union of Somaliland. a proud "home-grown Barre's rule, during which northerners tle attention or support. The media pre- tolerate any Islamic Courts took control last year. For democracy". repealed the 1960 Act of suffered greatly. Indeed, 97 per cent of fer the dramatic and violent south: other a kw months under the control of the Union with the south and in contrast to the population voted in favour of inde- nations see little of strategic or economic hardship, they wilt "Islamists" — as the western media have the rest of Somalia has proven politically pendence in a recent referendum. interest them. Perhaps that is for the best; not accept taken to calling the courts union — stable and peaceful, if relatively pour. for In the last. few months violence has after all. who wants the kind of help that Mogadishu was relatively peaceful. over fifteen years_ Part of the reason for returned to Mogadishu — if we can say Iraq is getting? injustice although there were some reports of this is the &minion Isaac' clan's insis- that it ever went away, - and various "Talihanization". In December the UN- tence on the inclusion of other clans in clans and the "Islamists" are vying for Email: hacked transitional government asserted the governmental system, and pro- control with the transitional government itself from its base in Baidoa and moved grammes for peace and reconciliation and its Ethiopian troops. The govern- [email protected] The Pelican's Closet

Maryam Ahmac was led to believe that Francis Drake was a British hero. Now she knows he was a slave trader and argues that this country should accept its dark past

Maryam Ahmad to my care-tree days in primary actually storage space for slaves whom ministers are too proud to reform the Sadly, like all other nations we base school. my class carried out a proj- Drake had chained up and brought as insulting and derogatory content of not learned from our past mistakes. Iect on u famous person in the histo- part of his 'cargo' from Africa. school history which misrepresents our The parasitic conduct of our govern- ry of our great country. Sir Francis I recently learned about this and heroic explorers and denies justice to ments on others in order to maintain Drake. We eagerly learnt about his was shocked to say the least. I revered those effected by the slave trade, it is wealth is still used albeit vs ith different ship. his world voyage and the com- a brutal slave trader and pirate as a unlikely that our PM will apologise methods. It may he the anniversary of modities that he introduced to England. great historical figure of Britain. and over mistakes that our country contin- the Abolition of the Slave Trade Act Ii was during a history lesson that I was encouraged in this by the educa- ues to conceal_ but the enslavement of people and their decided to capture the image of tion system_ 11 was nothing short of A less obvious practice of slavery in states by the British government is far Drake's Ship. The Pelican. outrageous. Yet to this day children are the twenty-first century is the war in from over, and judging by the increas- As a sailor's daughter, I was natu- still not taught the truth about past Iraq. Although Iraq and the slave trade ing threat of British invasion of other ral'y completely oserwhelmed by events which shaped Britain as we period are essentially incomparable countries such as Iran. the worst inav every detail involving its creation. It know it, as a free society which they do share some similarities. Iraq he yet to come. But, as the slave riots was ten years before I fully understood acknowledges the rights of all regard- hois been raped and plundered, and peo- eventually led to the Abolition. the the true purpose of The Pelican. less of 'race'. The brutality suffered by ple are killed en masse everyday. Iraqis resistance to the current occupation After piling on three layers of cray- an unfathomable amount of people, it are forced to flee their country, many will hopefully lead to Iraq's emancipa- on. I mastered the body of the ship, the scents. is to be forgotten. I cannot help are forced to work illegally in severe tion. mast. its tattered sails and punctured but think that our government would conditions and others' employment The brutality cabins and holds. I was so proud of rather forget about the past and disas- options are restricted. Our country ben- suffered by an myself. as at ten years old it was by far sociate Britain from the slave trade. efits from oil resources as a result of the best picture I had ever created. I My English tutor has a newspaper imposing authority on Iraq, not to men- unfathomable had an eye for detail and managed to cut-out stuck on his wall which states tion the qualified Iraqi doctors and amount of people, include a picture of ii scroll which Tony B lair's 'sorrow' for Britain's role lawyers employed for the minimum detailed the various goods that the ship in the slave trade. The article goes on wage in our newsagents as part of our it seems, is to be was carrying. What this document had to mention that he failed to issue the work force. The documentation used as forgotten failed to include. and what my teacher apology which many commentators a basis for the war is analogous to his- email had neglected to tell me was the fact demanded. This was followed by calls torical 'scientific' documents written that the cramped, dark, rat-infested for action including reparative meas- to prove the inhumanity of Africans hold brimming with sea water was ures and compensation. However, if and thus justify the stave trade, [email protected] Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 15 Comments expressed here are not necessarily the views of Leeds Student Comment Just for profit The end of the year is nigh and find Hassan takes a look at the state of Union `democracy', how it has changed over the past year and if it is truly in the interest of students.

Hind Hassan I is almost 40 years since the wave students and to coincide with the new lack the skill and experience to proN lac department with details; had it been of student protests descended upon charity laws which would remove the LUU with the proper scrutiny it held on a Wednesday afternoon and Iuniversities up and down the coun- potential risk that UC members could deserves. so should not act as a trustee not in the middle of Reading Week. the try, a movement which climaxed at be made bankrupt should anything board alone or else put our Union at turnout potential would have drastical- Leeds with the famous union sit-in. It happen to the Union. It's never hap- risk." I am at pains to understand their ly increased. as would the degree of was a time when student participation pened before, but it has suddenly reasoning, seeing that the Exec will democracy involved. was more than a dream and when the become a matter of extreme urgency. still be trustees and still get a vote on What appears to he the problem is word 'democracy' was not such a pros- Call me cynical. but I find it more than the board. It was not mentioned that MI the streamlining of democracy: the fact tituted adjective. It was inspired by a coincidental that, as student pressure student votes would be taken away and that the Executive Officers' powers are desire to effectively participate in uni- on Coca Cola and their alleged human given to appointed individuals. Why feeble and simply symbolic. At the versity governance and to aspire for an rights abuses gained considerable fuel could an advisory board not have been moment we are grasping very tightly environment where freedom of speech over the past few years, a motion call- set up to direct the Union Council? onto a rope that is being pulled increas- could flourish. Yet it appears that his- ing for a ban on the company was Why was the motion so vague? ingly in the opposite direction by tory is not repeating itself this time almost passed at last year's annual If the Exec and the powers pulling career-motivated administrators whose round. Gone are the protestors, in are NUS conference - one similar to that the financial strings behind the scenes primary interest is the Union's ability the lobbyers. Out are the AGMs. in are successfully passed at Sussex. Man- really gave two hoots about democracy to sell itself off as a commodity. There the referenda. Gone are the powers of chester and New York universities - then we would not have been presented will always he puppets and those who the student Union Council, in is the and we are suddenly presented with the with titled motions. Who is really pull the strings, but the ability to halt control of the bureaucrats. urgent need to remove the final say going to vote against a very vague this shift into the hands of big business It was the abolition of AGMs, and from the mass student majority and looking. unthreatening motion titled will always he in our hands. the introduction of referenda, that set place it in the hands of the Execs and 'Protect LUU'? 10 motions over two the motion rolling to firmly place the 'key' appointed individuals. semesters have been put to the student nail in the coffin of the term 'student- Of course the two matters are relat- body. all 10 have got a majority 'yes' led union'. The referendum was ed - Coca Cola have four multi-million vote with nine of them reaching quo- unveiled all guns blazing. proudly pro- pound contracts with the purchasing rum and achieving a position of bind- claiming itself to be more democratic consortium NUS Services Ltd. which ing union policy. It doesn't take a for the following reason: AGMs hardly supplies food, drinks and other prod- genius to realise that perhaps there is a ever reached quorum, with only ever ucts to NUS member unions at low huge glitch in this amazing new demo- around 300 students turning up to vote cost. I am still dumbfounded as to how cratic system. whereas the referendum, taking place such a motion could be presented to the True. AGMs never reached high over three days. would provide greater student body with such insufficient turnouts but at least motions could he access to more students and, thus. detail, completely neglecting to men- properly scrutinised and every student increase turnout and democracy. tion that: 1) to remove a trustee would had the right to vote on amendments. So that was it. the forums for debat- require 1.000 more votes than to pass a Their failure was not down to student ing and discussion, for amendments motion. 2) The Union Council. made apathy but a lack of organisation and and opposition. were exiled to the pits up of 42 elected students, would no advertising. As I recall, the AGM that of hell in favour of the brand-spanking longer he the highest decision-making took place last year was not only poor- new system, where amendments are body of the Union. 3) That half the ly advertised. but took place on a Mon- only passed through Union Council trustee- hoard would be appointed. This day afternoon in reading week. I guar- meetings, where only members are certainly does not fit with 'Protect antee that, had the Exec spent a month allowed to vote. This resulted in many LUU's' claim that "Our union should preparing and advertising; informing partisan students voting on whether be all about democracy, campaigning students about the opportunity to pres- Email: they liked the motion proposed, rather and making life better for students at ent radical, student-led motions: walk- than whether or not it should be put to Leeds." I would almost go as far as ing around campus engaging students the student body to decide. saying it was misleading: "The Exec on the issue; flyering; emailing every [email protected] In also came the 'Big Debate' - a substitute for the AGM discussons. So big was this debate that a massive turnout of 30 people turned up for the opportunity of pitching one point for or against each motion to an empty room ALL STUDENTS ARE EQ0041- and a microphone. And in came the infamous ballot box and the little book • of motions so ridiculously titled I find myself choking on my Weetabix just thinking about them. 'Protect LUU', a motion that would take away Union Council's role as trustees and as the highest decision-making body of the Union, placing it in the hands of the Exec, appointed students and non-uni- versity members who would primarily cc have the union's financial interests at heart. This means that, potentially. the The forums for new trustee hoard could overrule any debating and motion passed by the student body if they deemed it detrimental to their discussion, for bank account. While we're assured it amendments and will only be used in extreme situations, and would avoid any adopted political opposition, were policies, this has not been outlined in exiled to the pits of the constitution - poor old Coca Cola must have been quaking in their car- hell in favour of the bonated hoots, because this reeks of brand-spanking new external corporate control. Voices of concern were raised and aptly silenced system with the explanation that it was being implemented solely in the interest of Friday, April 27, 2007 16 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk

toot the bill? Does it not seem apprnpaat, Ellis debate goes on Fashion? that smokers shoud both have the choice to smoke and also pay the price for the come. Dear Editor. Leeds Student Dear Editor. qucnces of addiction and the damaging Was I the only one who considered last While Leeds Student can justifiably claim effects thereafter to their health? week's fashion piece to be an absolute credit for bringing Dr Frank Ellis' views If we do nothing, we solicit an untkair- joke? If I honestly cared what someone 0113 3801 450 on racial issues to attention of the wider bale and damaging habit. If we ban ciga- around uni was wearing and where they had [email protected] University community, it is grandiose rene sales then we simply brush the parh- bought their clothes from. I would just tap and palpably wrong to assert, as does lem of tobacco addiction under the carrel. them on the shoulder and ask them. your correspondant Matt Kennard. that safe in the knowledge that we have atara Are there not enough clones hanging the outcome of this issue was determined our hit' for those 'naughty smoker who around good old Eddy B anyway, without Attacks become largely by media pressure. were too stupid to know any better'. the paper promoting the recreation of some- If that had been the case, then the Uni- Do those who support the ban honestly one else's look? versity would have refrained from taking think that an addiction to nicotine renders any action at all, as views expressed in all smokers menially incompetent? As a more regular Yours. and by the media represented the whole smoker I am aware that my habit is killing et another front page of getting more Neriou.. It is time for spectrum of responses. ranging from calls me. As a smoker I am keen to stop in the for his immediate dismissal to demands Emma Lawson Leeds Student has been students to take more care of near future. But by banning tobacco sales I that Dr Ellis be acknowledged as a cham- Second Year History Student given up to attacks in the themselves, and their contempo- ant angered and enraged at such a poorly y pion of free speech. student community. raries. thought-out and myopic policy that I am Passions run high on such issues, and Smoking ban? No thanks. infact encouraged to smoke more in an act The frequency of sex attacks. The warning message could there are important principles at stake of defiance antral protection of my freedom and other crimes in the area is not be more clear: avoid walking which go to the heart of our values and Dear Editor. of choice. This may sound foolish, a case of taking a worrying turn for the home alone at all costs, no matter what we stand for. The legal position is cutting your nose off to spite your face, hut worst, as summer approaches and the distance and especially not (and was) extremely complicated. It is On hearing on Monday that the decision this is really desperate the smoker's case more students are nut and about in through the park, take the night sometimes hard to ignore all the clamour. had been made not to ban cigarette sales in has got. the early hours. Add to that the bus if leaving from University. sound and fury - and the demands for the union 1. for once. found myself admir- IT IS MY CHOICE TO SMOKE! Yes alchohol-fulled celebratory spirit get a taxi (Amber Cabs still offer immediate action - in order to reach the ing the policy making process of LUU. this is an unhealthy and potentially fatal right decision in a calm, dispassionate of those finishing exams or dis- rides to students with no cash if Banning tobacco sales is not going to stop habit but lint and fore-most there is a mat- manner. That is what we tried to do. pople from smoking. Of course it could be ter of principle at stake here. Freedom of sertations, with female students they agree to hand over their stu- With hindsight, we believe we got it walking home from local night- dent card and pay later) and if argued that in selling tobacco to students choice is one of the mast important rights right. Dr Ellis, our (former) employee. the union is essentially promoting a habit we have as human beings. It should not he spots alone, and quite soon we walking around the area, stay was treated fairly, but without which kills tens of thousands of Britons a compromised or revoked on any level could have a spate of attacks on alert. try not to distract yourself favouritisni. We are proud that we year and supporting an indstry which is unless it infringes on the rights of others. our hands in our own community. with mobiles or iPods. became the first university in the UK to grotesquely unethical. But banning ciga- Me buying 123 gramms of Drum does not Every day, students report an Don't be a victim, and try to take positive action (by suspending Dr rette sales is by no means an adequate prag- infringe on any-ones rights. plain and sim- attack. or a story of a friend who help others stay out of harm's Ellis) under new legal responsibilities on matic step Inwards treating the causes of ple. has been the victim of a burglary. way as well. public bodies to promote good race rela- this, it is merely a token gesture towards The union must act to prevent smoking mugging or similar. It is time for tions. treating the symptoms and a half-hearted as it has a responsibility to do so, but it Judging from your editorials. Leeds the student community to become one at that. should not surrender basic human liberty of Student should be proud of that too. How Smokers will smoke. regardless of its members. The validation that smokers more vigilant. and, even more many of our students would agree that importantly. to look out for each whether they can purchase their tobacco are a minority is equally weak. You cannot their tuition fees should have been spent from LUU shops or not. By banning it, the suggest that a ban on cigarette sales is valid other; helping another student on a seven-figure test case, perhaps to the only good the union will do to its smoking on the grounds that there are fewer smokers does not always mean risking House of Lords and beyond. when we members is encourage exercise. The fads than non-smokers any more than you can your own safety. Now attacks are had the option of reaching an amicable of this debate are simple. In order to ade- suggest anymore than you can suggest that and fair settlement in which Dr Ellis took quately treat addiction to smoking, it is not homosexual magazines should he banned his leave from our campus? Far from sufficient to simply take away cigarettes because there are fewer straight union being a cop-out. as Mr Kennard insinu- and hope for the best. What would instead members than there are gay. Of course Opinion remains ates, we believe the outcome was the best be a much more thoughtful and effective magazines cannot harm your health in a possible for the promotion of good race method of treating smoking addiction way that cigarettes can, but as i have relations. and for our university. and would be to continue selling tobacco prod- already demonstrated, a ban on tobacco should he acknow !edged as such by ucts and then invest the full £44,000 a year does not solve nicotne addiction any more split over Union Leed.s Student. than taking the needle off a heroin addict that is generated by those sales into 'Qua- dric clinics' and the provision of free nico- cures his or her dependency. Vanessa Bridge tine patches and advise to those who have Thank you LUU for a choice well made, cigarette sales Director of Media Relations chosen to quit. It could be said that the clinics could Yours. efleeting the mood on campus, the Union is a shop that will sell ciga- be funded without the sale of tobacco. opinion on Union cigarette rettes. After an offer from the Chan- something which unduly puts 'blood on the Jonathan Price Rsales is split in the Leeds Stu- cellor to top up the amount the Union hands' of union members but who then is to 3rd year Politics dent office. stand to lose from removing ciga- Sonic believe that the presence of rettes. there is little financial argument Send letters to Leeds Student newspaper, Leeds university Union. PO Box 157. Leeds LSI 'UK or email the editor on editortkleedssiudent .1rerik. Please keep comments to 200 words The editor reserves the right to edit letters for conteni and space. cigarettes behind the counter is an for keeping them_ ever-present incentive for non-smok- However, what is clear is that if the ers to start. Others think that it should Union are considering the removal of he the choice of the student if they a product that provides them with ** Improve your text life - text LS ** want to buy cigarettes or not, and that 1:44.0(X) a year. then this product must the Union should not have the right to pose a serious risk to health. Hopeful- take away this freedom to choose. ly, this message will not be lost much as i read epage with caution. ita Some think it couldn't be less impor- throughout this debate. Last week's LS was shire. That stnirnoll much more fitting than that Scorch tripe. txt 07794 tant; just a hundred metres away from advert made me cry Self-centred exec and paper promotion 125795 **4-**********•********** ***** * ******** ******1:*******X******* Lydia benns rocks my socks off and my David Brent lives at our uni. I've seen 2 get ur msg in Women inspire underpants him in the flesh.

a**aasosaaaaaaaaaaasaaaaaaasaaa ************4***************** female graudates I didn't think the paper was a Labour Bit of a depressing paper last week what party flyer until last week! What about with sex attack and other depressing sto- ongatulations to the Women's job in itself, even though this still the other candidates? ties. Let's hope for some good news this Assembly. whose Inspirational receives an unfair amount of criticism. week Cwomen's Forum served as a The panel raised awareness of how. *soosa ************ saaaaa*****aa reminder that women are still strug- with determination, gender is no Looking forward to a man utd chelski **a** filing to achieve equality in the work- object in the workplace, and that it final. It's best of three. utd for all of Cock!!!! place. really comes down to skill and ability. them. Come on Fergie The varied panel offered a compre- The women that spoke were a true ****************************** **oaks aa.saa•aaa sopa. iraa ayoolosatarr hensive guide to the achievements of inspiration to females granduating Why am 1 textin into the paper, is this women across the skills sector, and from the University this summer, par- Word to the monk. MH how much I'm avoiding revision. Damn tt Leeds Student. also provided thought-provoking rues- titularly those who have taken up a****aa********Saa********a*** sages regarding the job of the single careers in maledominated fields. Thank God that Scorch is no more. As *********************W*******• parent. so demanding a role that it is a ▪

Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 17 LS-2: nsid,:-;

• • • • • • • • • • • • ••• • •• a • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • * • • • • • • .••• • • • vm • • • • • •• • • • • • • • • • • f • • • • a a o • • • • S • • • • • • • S • 4 • .• • • • • • • •• • • •• • • • • • • • • • 0 • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •eil • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • * • • • • • • • • a • • • • • • • • • ha.. • • • • • a • • • • • • • •••O•• • • • • • • • • 55 • • ••••••• • ***** • • • • • a • • • • • • • 4 • i • ,. 24 • • • Balance: •ar ...... • • 1 . • • • ;1•.-:' • LS2:inside's foray 23 I • ...... • • „ '.'l, ; . • ...„. • into fiction a • ••••••••••••••••• ***** ••••••• OOOOO •••• • • 0 • Eliot Hughes thrills us with a • t a, • short story • . • a • • ••••••••••••••••••••• • • ••Sound Tracks 24 • ti a • •• OOOOO ••••■••••••••••••••••••••••• • • • • • • • • • • LS2:inside's music team puts • • • together their top ten albums • • • • • • of your degree • • • • a • • • • • • 1.1111 • • • Closer 3 0 I • • • • • • • • Closer - the LU1J version • • • • • sans Natalie Portman - • • • reviewed along with all the • • • • • i• weeks' best releases in Screen • • • and Stage . • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Are you Mark Z's friend? Do • • • • • • you want to poke him? Maybe • • • • ▪ you could send him a secret • • msg. Find out what e thinks • • • about the facebook revamp. • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • O OOOOOOOOOOOO • •• •• •• II • • •• • Books • •• • • • • • • • Chris Tedd reviews Ian • • • • • • McEwan's latest novel On • • Is it perfect • .4000 • Chesil Beach. • • holiday literature, or will you • • feel washed up? •

18 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007

By Poppy Kemp and Olivia Marks LOWDOWN} (insane in the membrane) • • Going Up • Top 10 • • • Diaries • • • [Cs nice to chart you IOC, and even : Uni • er w hen yini loots hitck in a fev. • f there's one thing I've learnt for a colouring competition. But the obviously travels fast. Either that. or , ■ 1,11111i . I ma, • during my time at anis eriry. o 's to thing is I haven't really learnt this nobody has anything more interesting • :ht,, and • retard C ei 511(11 Iholl Inot lease things to the last minute lesmin at all. If I had then I wouldn't IO talk about. This is probabls. more • Mysteries feelings down and hope no-one linds • I'm referring mains to essay s here, be in meltdown right now. Sor ry to likely as most people I know have •• It's moods me it thes do • • but also to inn having ample toile to anyone who has had the misfortune of had their personalities sucked out of • we've been here on three year., nov, and • Let ready before a lecture and has ing to he around inc in the last them by Edward bloody Itos le. I, • misjudging the owe It takes to get III couple of weeks. It must base been don't blame them. its not their fault • basically know everything there is to • a workplace. -Actually I tell a lie. I bad. seeing. us I keep humping into they lime to spend their day s and • know about life at Leeds Uni. The best • learnt this lesson a long, long lime Pm* who look at me and say "Ooh, nights with the parasite that is Ihe • place to get lunch. exactly where the • was about fis- I Freddiss are in Essentials and where to get • ago. Probably when 1 c heard you're not doing very w Eddy B. Asa result. conversations: • or something and missed the deadline News about my mental health base turned even more base than, the night bus front. But do we? Them arc • usual. If the dialogue between myself • a few things that have worried us for a • and friends for even strangers) while...and it's douhthil that we will ever Scope • tilled a ith toilet talk then its about • know the answers Oh well. The hest chaise] shop in town. Mu. • food. What food do you really like at •• more wasonably priced Man Osfain • • the moment? What are you having for • 1. the girls toilets stench - The ones in RSPCA and has a flood retro sectioL • • dinner? How do you like you're * the Union always stink of shit. Eggs shit, • Check it and save your loan potatoes done? For fuck's sake. • Fishy shit. Sweaty shit. lust always shit, summer getaway. To Scunthorpe • There's nothing like an extended • But these toilet: slink so much it's like • cons ersation about potatoes to make • eery girl that has been in there has Speak the Hungarian Rapper • Ho this um, 1 ouTuhe and laugh your a you feel like the most boring bastard: dropped the kids off at the pool. Not very Fucking socks off. We .ant stop • in the world. S'nfortunalely. !hey. feminine. singing along. harmonising, and just • seem to he pretis frequent at the • generalls shouting 'hi siness' as loudly • moment. I reall y need to find • 2. Game On cash machine - Why did they have to move it? It used to be such a as we 6;:111_ 1111 , WWI to FlUrralvr I something interesting to say col just • • • nice little secret for those who knew about • sta\ silent until I do. But you know, • • life isn't all doom and gloom. In ;s • it. Now it's all out in the open all the • couple of weeks I will he a mystery is gone and we all have to queue. • woman, in every sense. and I can • Dickheads. • to my hearts content. I am very sus • • looking forward to lying inert fol • 3. Little Essentials - Why doesn't it sell • • long. long time. I might mph. : cans of coke? You can only buy bottles • Poppy to feed Me grapes sr and sometimes 500m1tif sugary tilt IN just • intermittently pour wine into Ni • too much. Everyone knows that coke l.'sing -film' language • mouth. Actually. swap the erapes I • tastes FAR better out of a can so why are By this we mean telling taxi drivels to • whole bars of chocolate and wine for • they heing so biased? ■• 'hit it!' or - follow that eat!' Closei vodka. Then she can mop me up when • followed by doing mundane things and • The Pond - Why • it all comes back up again. Poppy 's 4. is it only sometimes saying "I live for this shit!". "You can't • one lucky woman. OM • filled with water? Yes, it does rain and fill handle the truth!" and "get with the • • it from time to time, but it is frequently programmer'. • full of H2O when there's been no sign of • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • Hellish heroes Overheard precipitation, Horribly perplexing... Clapping on Deal or No Deal? • • o LAST lone there was a gig at Woe, there was a queue round the • • 5. Roger Stevens - Sorry but why did Don't clap when someone takes out the • • block. no barriers. just four bouncers linked arm in arm forcing back • 6 She did the crab • anyone choose to build this building? It 1.101).0(X) because it's nothing to shout • • 350 people. the hand playing in an alcove. and then the lead singer of backwards, naked...is it • looks like Lego and is so unpractical it about. You wouldn't congratulate • the Cribs crowd surfed and sparked himself out on one of the lapdaneing • OK when I slide it • makes the hell of a 10am lecture so much someone for losing a race. would you? • • . • • poles. And. what? You weren't there? Oh you must have been one of the 600 • m?...ouch. pube caught in • worse. Sweaty. badly laid out. awkward, trapping and ugly. Pull it down. Sunny days • people queuing outside. Wire don't put on gigs often. and when 1 say 'not • pants...there's nothing worse than • The sun can fuck right off cos we'se • often' I mean, like twice. So this Wednesday, make sure you're free, Hell is • ungrateful tramps...I cannot stop • • for Heroes are playing. This band have a lot to answer for They shaped a • masturbating... • 6. Smoking - You can't smoke in the got lots of work on and Olivia's • • lot of tortured teenage attitude, then ran oil to Sweden for a few years. or • Refectory but you can smoke in Stylus. involves the library and Poppy's • • • had luck and liming, but they've Now that is just sully - it's practically the involves darkened theatres. Neither of • something. They've had their fair share of • which are great advocators of natural • stuck to their gut feelings about what THEIR music should sound like, and :Pic of the week • same building. Either ban it outright • just emerged from the bar, saloon doors swinging and pistols firing. Post- (which will happen in July anyway) or light. So bring on the rain...till 18th • AAAhalia. would you please look at this. • • hardcore, rock, alternative, whatever. If sou were brave enough to EVER go • allow it everywhere. May. • He's pissed off because he just got in • The Vine, maybe you caught rockers Locus Of Control. or the indie RnR • • from the office and his boss has been giv- • Guns • kids Antihero. Yeah well they kicked out the fillers and merged to form mess 7. Printer credits - How overdrawn can • • ing him shit all day. His housemate's • Look, after what happened in Virginia band. FORTUNE FAVOURS, who are supporting. This band are good. you go? Arc we talking 50? 100? 1000? If • • being a frigging loser coz he's all loved • last week, surely it's become clear to • you'll he pleasantly surprised, these guys have done this before, these guys • you feel a hit ker-azy during all this essay up with this new bitch. And to top it all • EVERYONE that guns are fairly had • aren't shy. They've hung around long enough with enough scenesters to not • • madness. why not try and find out? Don't he's gotta watch Look North coz there's things? Why do American's insist on • give a shit. In terms of special. these guys are a 12 inch creme egg I heard • • tell your friends about it though, they'll • bullock all else on. Fuck's sake. having them'' They're pointless. • you find on the pillows at the Ritz. And on their website it says they always • think you're boring. • • • • buy drinks for their fans after their gigs. ALWAYS. Tickets from Wire hos, • • • office, jumbo, crash,www.ticketweb.co.uk,( basically we're making it easy • • 8. Edward Boyle lifts - Why are these so • for you so you can avoid the crush on the night.) LIO. hands on at 8pro. So • ■often out of action? Is someone • whilst we're here. top tips for this summer. Hell is for heroes will release an • • deliberately breaking them with their • album up there 12 inch creme • • massive weight every day for a 'laugh'.' • • • Spare a thought for those who need them. • eggs, and Fortune Favours. • • • well you can fall in love them • • like disabled people and lazy Puckers • at the Best Club In The World. • Super-skinny 'experiments' • sorry Wire, this Wednesday, • 9. The plastic spoons in Essentials • What. informing impressionable young • 2ncrMay. • Why are they so annoyingly [itchy? Not • girls just exactly how you get down to • Cheek out the club night with • good for yoghurt-eaters like myself. • • • a sin zero? Ridie. Also, if you actually • LSR djs playing after, or if you • • wan, to look like a 8 year old child. • want, cheek out the gig live • 10. Dirtiness in the Brotherton- If you you've got mental problems. s online at wwss.lsrfm.com. EA • I • walk round and round long enough you • • start to spin in a horrible way. Yes it's • • circular but why to you get quite so dizzy? Going Down • • • Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 19 RICHARD CHRIS WOOLLEY DIXON

within a 250 mile radius of their inner screen all day. these things are home. they hake their own bread. designed to send you slowly- to mad- they even take the stairs instead of ii ness. This can he the only espliinaliint the lift. for women like Prescrat's dirty diary n eader. 'Hang nil. wait, +a ait, Al Gore lady and the whole Bill Clinton cigar wait, sou didn't Say s hat thov did incident_ Either ilea tint instead of using toilet paper?' visited the 111 stun Me. 'No, well. erne, I'd rattle; oil ;1;:itut not.' pair, and a ,..altLk- tip %•. ills a li!rtlothi ,w, todds 'Inch Reader. 'Oh come on, you can't should esplam panerns in our helots - he coy now. we're already on the torturous joie. 'Adults', which I AM surely not. topic. how had can it he.' often complain about how young peo- Me - treluctuntly 'Well they also collaborative ple are becoming less imelligent and grow things you see. plants. inside academic life is censequently becom- the apartment. and. well, plants ing easier to tailor to this new genera- grow better with a ready supply of performance tion of idiots. I propose this: The t was a frosty New York ‘k eiii i 0 Edward Boyle library compost - so it's just a matter of Is tiN blame. Theoretically it evening in the dying weeks of between today Internet I 1973. Leroy Jenkins had just redirecting it ' should be A positive. force, an educa- A campaign of seemingly I tive tool which deameiatises social been Christmas shopping. and. after 1 V,3s truly belies ins that considet- universal praise has been launched Crow, Faith and class structures, We have been a pleasant family supper, putting lne my complete lack ol productivity for lire Conlin-Be:iv- ens ssho. it has his children to bed and telling his when at home. largely due granted it "'lc in shaping what we to he said. seem to take Sheryl wife he loved her. he ascended to Hill and to...snacks/the VISCIRMS, time stealing watch, what make:, us laugh. influeue- Crow very seriously. Unfortunately the 'bathroom' to round off a long void that is the Mg how politieians should behave and day with a satisfying shit. Halfway they are. at the most basic level. Carole King interact/Neighbours/excessively long so on. These are powerful sugges• yuppies. This shouldn't matter. but up the stairs however came the tuna preparation tinkomy phoueithix lions. except there is one problem, that it does. familiar sound of The Tonight took place in hook called 'Is It Just Me or is Every- being that the interact is full of shit. I Show's Johnny Carson. with the If you arc able to own an thing Shit - No Man, it's not just clicked and entered the World Wide perturbing news of an impending apartment in central Manhattan, it Washington youiand other innocuous distractions Web vvtrh good intentions this sonny necessarily follows that you are toilet paper shortage set to grip the littering my room that do not fall into afternoon. I had a cup of tea to the left financially secure enough to spend U.S. over the Christmas period. the category of work...1 might Hod of me ansl my notebook km the oght time, energy and money DC Well 'news' isn't the right word. some solace in the oasis of calm that i. ,just attempted to read Baudrillard. an individually sourcing your organic sarcastic joke would be a lot nearer Richard that time-honoured institute of acade- insane yet pretty am/Ling cultural the- the mark, but in the early seventies diet by casting a net for 250 miles 5 5 mia. the Library. Alas. I thought I was orist, I think to myself that I would around New nd it was perhaps more difficult to York A going to the esteemed location of like to know more about this man, s43 co muni•ating individually with differentiate between the two. And ► brain•improvement. but I must he mis- Ito to the number one democratic growers and sellers For the vast this was certainly true of Leroy taken. for I found myself in a wooden knowledge site. Wikipedia. Within majority of New Yorkers. and for Jenkins (who, I should add, didn't cage. gazing desperately out of the twenty minutes 1 am on a page telling the vast majority of people. this is actually exist) but who for the window as they construct a noisy,. me things like: "The term "the whole of course impossible. Just like purpose of this story wasted no time modern monstrosity outside. I do not 0 yards" came from WWII fighter Sheryl Crow's demand that in driving to the nearest all night object to building new facilities, any- pilots in the South Pacific. When arm- Americans limit themselves to one supermarket and buying up all the one who has been skewered between ing their airplanes on the ground. the sheet of toilet paper per shit is a toilet paper. tissues, and paper the library stacks that move would .50 calibre machine gun ammo belts ridiculous proposition. She was towels he could lay his hands on. agree that more space can he a good measured exactly 27 feet, before being joking. and has had to admit as Hundreds of real New Yorkers did thing. But why oh why must luminous loaded into the fuselage. If the pilots much in a press conference, but the same. The following Jay it was men cut metal in my cochlea when I Bred all their ammo at a target. it got only after complaints were made impossible to find a roll of toilet am trying to absorb the mine field that -the whole 9 yards." I don't know how that such an adjustment was paper for sale anywhere in the five is media law? I missed the I got here. One minute I was filling unfeasible. boroughs. e-mail saying "Miss Dixon. we know my brain with knowledge. reaching to Waste is a problem. particularly Fast forward 35 years and how much you want to royally cock-up the utopian ideal Elf intelligence and the waste of paper. And of course America is finally beginning to see y our finals, so we have decided to happiness. expanding my hortions, organic vegetables are the best you the cost of such a drought. Over build new stuff in the vicinity of your yadda yadda yadda. The next I know , can hulk , but they are also the most recent weeks Sheryl Crow and studies for the duration of that period." am filling my brain with junk and tes- expensive. This is Laurie David (the wife of overrated what Cheers. ting my friends things like. "No word campaigners so consistently comedy writer Larry David) have I am easily distracted and I wager in the English language rhymes with overlook. Stopping climate change. been travelling between one that I am not alone in this. Seriously. month, orange. silver.-and purple" and and seriously stopping it. not just Midwest university campus and Edward Boyle desk scribes. a poll on "The very first bomb dropped by the occasionally reusing old plastic another, arguing moderation in Chris whether fat or thin girls are better in Allies on Berlin during World War II bottles. or remembering to recycle toilet paper consumption. It seems bed? As if the moron writing that crap killed the only elephant in the Berlin this paper. is a bloody expensive the average Americans squander is ever going to convince anyone to Zoo." process, News paper profiles of about 5.3 sheets of toilet paper per have sex with him. Anyway, I digress. Don't even get me started on Face- such model green families become wipe in every trip to the restroom, a I thought I According to an American survey the book, less impressive and more figure that's dangerously high. and average worker admits to frittering Or My-space. disheartening as they remind people could be contributing to the climate was going to away 2.119 hours per K-hour workday, Get back to work. of the gap between those who can change problem. Al Gore visited the excluding lunch and scheduled break- afford to restart their lives as sell" pair on tour, and what sounds like a lime. When employers determine your • I borrowed my crap facts and stars sufficient new-agers, and those who the esteemed torturous collaborative performance pay they take this fact into considera- from can't. between Crow. Faith Hill and tion. Taking their greedy capitalist hopoiwww,pikabluxo,uktfacts.htm The last thing I want to do is location of Carole King rook place in logic into consideration. I guess that and SFgate,com appear apathetic. There arc several Washington DC, where the tour means we are never required to be dili- things a student on a low income brain- ended. on Sunday. gent and efficient because they are can do to help the environment; the The Conlin-Beavan family, two paying us wages that reflect the Organic Co-op near the Old Bar is affluent Manhattanites who were improve- assumption that we won't he. proof enough of that. And to help recently profiled in the New York Anyone who has ever seen the film with the conservation of toilet Times lifestyle pages. evidently ment, but I Office Space - join me now! Take a paper, as a lifelong Sheryl Crow took the message to heart. The hat to the photocopiers! Slash the tyres fan. I've even started looking for family of three are attempting to go must be of the noisy trucks! Or. non-incite- alternative places to wipe: glossy a year without the use of toilet ment to violence suggestions could lifestyle supplements might he a paper, or any other paper for that include making work spaces less good place to start. mistaken matter, possibly even the paper they bloody dull. The hum of air condition- sold their story to. The pair are also ing. the tap-tapping of a woman's email: [email protected] manicured nails on a desk, the mind- email: [email protected] restricting themselves to a solely Richard is an English finalist organic diet of groceries grown 5 5 numbing boredom of looking at a cum- Chris is a Viz character 20 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 LI

• 0. Bright eyed boyi Tortured soul or down to earth song writer, Conor Oberst is currently revelling in the success of Bright Eyes' latest album 'Cassadaga'. But despite his international fame little is known about him and much is assumed. Is he as mysterious as he is percei- ved to be? "Deeds Student had a brief chat with him to try and find out.

"Hey there buddy. how s it going?" Cert- ainly not the cheery greeting I would expect from a man often documented as a shy. reclusive and particularly awkward interviewee. Indeed Oberst's candour throughout our brief chat was remarkably light-hearted and contrary to the common imago; of him portrayed by the music press. His lyrical eloquence and ability to dunce around the point whilst still remai- ning totally convincing also comes across in his casual and relaxed style of answe- ring questions he has presumably been asked a thousand times before. One such question was of course irre- sistible. What was going through his heal when he made these seemingly disrespe- ctful remarks about John Peel at the 21)05 gs Glastonbury festival' Was it an ironic CASSADAGA stab at the plethora of acts throughout the weekend who had began there sets with the obligatory "This one's tier John Peel" to the ends of an easy cheer? "Not really" he replies "we had been touring fur the best part of a year and we were hungry and muddy and tired. We had sat around SPiR I TUALIST all day getting drunk amongst other things. When I got on stage I wasn't real- ly sure what was going on." A somewhat nnsatisfactory response. but nonetheless he insists that he has "nothing but respect for him'' and means no ill will to his memory or his fans. CAMP Indeed his response is typical of the fact that Oberst is a man often misunder- stood. His lyrics inspire many and often seem to be charged with anti-west semi- merits and resentment generally of the current world order but in reality he assu- res me that the extent to which Bright as has been the case with Bono and Bob for him. Would it be better if he didn't do is polite. not willing to pander to the Ash in a Digital Urn change the way in Eyes are on a political mission is over Geldof. "Musicians are people too" he anything at all?" niceties of interview etiquette but without which he writes music?"Absolutely not." stated, "I write about what I'm thinking. I responds -just because they make music Oberst has a way of catching you off being rude. Conventional pre-concepti- Does he hate giving interviews? "No." Is don't sit down and try and write a certain shouldn't mean that they're not allowed guard and making you feel like a small ons of this man will almost undoubtedly he one of the most distinguished. genuine type of song for the hell of it." I ask hint an opinion. I like Bono, he's getting out mollusc looking up at a menacing shark he inaccurate. Has the success of I'm and talented song-writers of our generati- further to this if he thinks the roles of a there doing his thing and I think its great passing over-head. He is as cutting as he Wide Awake It's Morning and Digital let you have that singer and a politician should be blurred on? Go on, one. Is this the wayto Cassada a? BRIGHT EYES ners. Despite the fact that 'Clairaudients', been healed. then he has a very ungrateful frustrating rel'utal of responsibility that 'Coat Chec k Dlc:1111 Song' opens side Cassadaga Cossirdagn's opening. maintains the tra- way of showing it. This is something of a coloured 'Train Under Water'. Where the four and makes Ilse of an intriguing Ara- Saddle Creek/Polydor dition by means of a semi-atonal swine relief hut. seconds later, when the opening record is more acutely referential to an bic-sounding hook. like something from a section and a cynical one-way telephone strains of lead single 'Four Winds' stir up. inability to live the life of solitude that it half-remcmhered dream, no longer with conversation. the LP seems to have been it seems questionable how tongue-in- seems to long for. such as on the Spector- any case to make, but a strong association designed with the specific intention of cheek the bastardisation of 'Santa Claus Is esque 'Make A Plan To Love Me''or the and a dissatisfied inconelusion. drawing in casual listeners, This is not a Coming To Town' really is. Nonetheless. deceptively upbeat 'I Must Belong Som- If there is nothing as potently able to negative point in itself: if it loses anything the sone is excellent. Biblical references ewhere'. the tine between albums seems tear apart the listener's very soul as some of the discomforting intimacy of /in Wide ambiguously peppering its misleading again blurred. Where the melancholy is of Digital Ash or I'm Wide Awake's more Awake. It's Morning or the fractured clau- chirpiness, it stirs up the dead leaves that more maturely tempered, notably on effective moments, or as perfectly cncap- strophobia Q1'Digital Ash In A Digital Urn have settled around Bright Eyes' legacy beautiful closer 'Lime Tite'. the wealth of sulutive as the frail emotion on lifted or then it is by design: this is the album over the last couple of years: two non- musical and sociological experience Fevers and Mirrors (or as lucky. as easy. Oberst. Mogis et al wanted to make. It studio releases after his last full album. a within this songwriter is obvious. or free) then there is a sense of moving doesn't sound like a compromise but an ha hangs in the balance but (sickeningly) At thirteen trucks. Cassadaga is not forward, of killing one's darlings. This is experiment. albeit a very safe one. Oberst has yet to fall irons the beam. particularly concise, and, whilst the doub- a bigger album. it has been well doctimen- The sinister monologue that opens the Whatever his personal agenda. the le-vinyl length is a format that has worked ted. No longer a small-time acoustic arti- album (where is the person on the other album refuses to relinquish the themes of before (Lifted). it seems unnecessary. st. Oberst is throwing orchestrations and end of the line? Why is the voice so gent- misguided quest, to find oneself, chara- 'Soul Singer In A Session Band'and soundscapes around as though he were ly persuasive'!) concludes. six minutes cters trapped in familiar situations. men 'Classic ('ass' do nothing to further the making X0. Luckily, self-indulgence is In the sleevenotes to At.iu f lout. last after the stylus hits the first side, with a being fooled by things more 'rear. 'Hut thematic content, and, occurring consecu- something that Bright Eyes seem to have year's rarities collection. Oberst states that chilling echo over 'there are so many Knives' has thematic resonance with tively. threaten to derail the album. Even got down to an art.(8) the abstract soundscapes that open all his people who do not believe'. If Conor R.E.M.'s 'Sweetness Follows'; '11 The so, it is far from stagnant or overindul- albums are there to ward off casual liste- Oberst has grown up, found himself and Brakeman Turns My Way' exhibits that gent. By Raw) alwaked Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 21 Class warrior Sam Beeton seems poised to take over the observable universe. iakeel catches up with a man whose primary objectives are the promotion of hats, an undisclosed political agenda and the distancing of himself from James Blunt.

am Beeton is hailed. at feel guilty about. I deserve to be answer is that w a) melined. least by the promotional promoted." Concerned. I push for largely nonsensical -I'm ;cry. very . postcards littering the some information about how set very, working class indeed. Whereas tables of the Leeds Met directed he really is. "75'4, say that 1 they re not very good at all." How Bar, as "the finest new choose when and what to play; the rest important is your class. then? "It's talent"; WC ordingly, we is RCA. It's not a battle - we work very important. it shapes how you deal meet for a chat after his acoustic together. 1 guess I'm the sort (il artist with things_ and talk to people. 1.1. slunchtime set. Finding it hard to hear that can he trusted to do the right you're working class, you stay On your each other over the seemingly arbitrary feet, you're not too American about ltrop of music videos. we end up stood The inters sew has barely been going things. But anyone can write a good on the stage itself. downstage right, for ten minutes. and it leek like Becton song." So is that the major difference nest to the stairs. where it is so dark is playing with me, I conclude that he between you taut them.' "That's not the that I have to write whilst holding a is trying to make a statement. but he is crux of the biscuit." Endearingly torch in my left hand. giving nothing away :Mout what it mixing his metaphors. especially after a "This was what I wanted, but things might be. "It there's a political issue. I proclamation like "they hring shame on have just happened." he tells me. "I will shout about it from the rooftops." anyone who holds a guitar". seems didn't have a website: I didn't promote he stresses. a bit later. "I'm not the sort rather too obvious an attempt to defuse myself. I was spotted in a hat. aced 13. to keep it to myself. I'll support certain the direction of questioning. but in Nottingham. A producer walked in things on the website. But I wouldn't and decided he wanted to record me." he a Bono creature. I'm not going to Becton signed to RCA records in had mouth Bonn. but... Wails 41 I August last year. When, somewhat won't be a hypocrite. There's a quote ii provocatively. I ask about any tension for you." He hints at something more between his DIY image tplaying a free specific, but "won't disclose tr. That's Class is very acoustic tour, releasing a download not fun journalism! "Ali. but you've single) and his major label backing. he slimed the process. You've started important. If responds rather terrifyingly. "When we chipping away at tt. You're almost need to he 'major'. we will," he half- there." you're threatens, "hut it's good to get an Whether or not this agenda relates to intimate base of tans to sell Innited the social structure of Britain is unclear working class, editions to. I don't hold the view that hut, when I ask about the tees you stay on the major label thing is something to BluntNorrison comparisons, Ins your feet; you're not too American going to bend." IOU Can't ICaell people music': You about things What does he think of the rather Can encourage them to appreciate immodest tagline? "I dtdn't write that, rant you" "Yeah. But you can teach but if someone wants io say that about people what's good and what's bad,. " me then that's very nice." Who is the Can you? "Nat's what I mean. You 77 finest new talent if he isn't? "He's not might listen tO a bit OF... Elgin'. a hit of perhaps I am being a little harsh, new. bin Ryan Adams." Disnessingly. the Enigma variations... and be told Judging by his Wet set, Beeton 1 warm to him somewhat as a result of why it's not good music. but I like it a sitting on better material and this. even if lie has not answered the lot." Would a music teacher do that? presentation than the download single question properly. One is given the "Yeah" As a music student, I'm not 'Best Friend'. Unlike Becton himself. distinct sense that Beeton kneow sure I would agree. "Go on then. It is neither shocking nor ambiguous. exactly wham questions be answer what's wrong with it? You tell me." "it's got broad appeal." he explains. well in advance of interviews; whether Well .. I don't dunk there is anything "It's got a sentiment that everyone Can I manage to get anything out of hint. or wrong with It. If Elgar makes buy into. It's catchy." There will, he am merely playing straight into his theoretical "mistakes", he'll do it says. be a lull [tangible) single in hale. hands, is very difficult to gauge, but I knowing that he is, and it w (friss_ Indeed_ perhaps the most intriguing plough ahead. Becton, either way. seems thing about the record is its repeated We discuss the acoustic scene in u neon v need. and perhaps reference to headwear. "I'm quite Nottingham ("I've got no idea. I didn't understandably so. The idea of a State- excited about hats. I've got quite a gel involved. But it was vas) to get regulated grounding in something that. shaggy head of hair, so it's good to gigs. My dad played in a hand and I with whatever leanings. he seems to have a backup for days when it doesn't played the drums") and his own taste in live and breathe. must he dissatisfying. quite work. And it brings something music. His best ever gig. he tells me, Frustratingly. at this stage. someone with the ladies. The ladies like a good was a Levellers concert in official clambers onto the stage and hat. Society was better when everyone Nottingham's Rock City. His favourite asks pointedly if w e are done. had a hat; we seem in has e lost the hat album is Zappa's Broachrai Mc Him/ enquire as to whether Sam Becton has a from modem day Britain. And the first Way. Again. I feel there. is a thew. but message for the readers of Leeds line, about the hat on the floor. I I fail to spot it. Niudem. "You are the future of Britain. suppose could he a reference to I ask what he did at school. It turns so yon'd better make sure you work husking. But then the song goes on to out that he left before his sixth form: "I hard. then we'll he hack on top. Erin.,. say. "I was face clown in the sugar was on a path". What A levels would I'm not a nationalist," But you like howl". And I won't explain that." he have done, then? "Sonic intense, Elg.ar. "Medical students need to work Urn... alright. "No. you're meant to scientific A level. Maths. A hit of hard. too," he continues. "We need a say. "oh. go on"." Go on, then. "No. number crunching. English. I've cure for cancer," always liked English." Music? "No. By Ramzy Alwakevl Li 22 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2C —

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Id., Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday. April 27, 2007 23 Cultured

alanceNot so with the daguerreotype_ 'the by these who wish to understand eausea of he light front the flashbulb had to be sealed. I still have a dusty tome It's the visual that holds truth. And a sticks to your eyes the was fit being twenty years since 1 opened of photograph is as close as you can tea vapourof iodine deposits a layer of photo- death, It is not a spiritualist yearning. It is the smell of formaldehyde posed pictures. Reclining on elbows, in Another snap of light and jumbled sensitive silver halide particles onto a not the fixing of one's projected love. I go does to clothing. To blink the nude, standing. at ten paces to steal senses mean that the smell of formaldehy- plate of mirror-polished ailsen Then, an borne at the end of each day, stinking of is to try and wash the anticipation from the moment and harden de is the only externality that. can't be image of the Daguerreotypiat's choosing attempted ignorance to death. The image off your retina and. the thought with chemicals. And, during ignored. Sometimes the bodies of the very is focussed onto the plate through a lens. chemical which masks putrefaction and sometimes,T as when you adjust your own their reign. their pictures. these boys young arrive in small metal cases which The development process involves hea- ;synthetically tints our understanding of personal aperture within a squint. the would hang on my walls. staring hack at have flip-locks on the fronts. not dissimil- ting mercury in a specially designed con- after. The grotesqueness of the day, etched image floats in a skyward direction though me. thanking me for their delayed transi- ar to the briefcases of the professional bus- tainer and then holding the exposed plate onto my retinas. I poured my soul into my your eyes are not moving. I had this con- ence. Conversation with these men was Mess men who rush into the hospital with over this vat of liquid metal. The image is art and have had it smudged Out through cept explained to me by a dreamer, He mostly dreary and I variously ignored their crisis painting their countenances. This is then fixed onto the plate by dipping the this hi-aril-IC toil. Thinkers have suggested. said that that was the death of the image. uttered thoughts, catching. perhaps, a final not how I envisaged my photographic entire daguerreotype into a solution of that each image necessarily defines its There are cliched thinkings that exist and word or two so that my feigned responses career. My anal supposed. would never be hyposulphite of soda. A process yields opposite. So. a photo of death, of hurt, of suggest that the taking of an image remo- would go undetected as fraudulent. I was needed. My craft. I didn't believe. could only a positive image: tin image that could decadence, means life. Me. The other ves a part ef the subject's soul. Perhaps kept, merely and completely. by their ever be drawn into a maim of necessity. not be replicated. Fashion and current aspect of this photography. I'm mirrored this ethereal drifting of light is part of good looks. Being blessed with what you Every picture that is taken was meant to fascination with the dead and dying from these pictures of the dead and the making its exit. 01 course, accepting that might call beauty myself. I was able to be shared! Every image focussed is meant dictated that much of the purpose of this dying. If we are the living, what is our brand of myth is difficult to swallow in ensnare any male of my choosing. But. to be shown to the maximum number of technology was to capture post-mortem. reflection? How do we reflect? Each dead such a scientific field. Photography needs these relationships would, predictably, others. Sharing and balance are the essen- The sadness of having a loved one pass child. each fatally wounded adult. Sym- precision. It needs care. Love. Patience. A break down alter a tiny short epoch. A ce of such a creation. And so. now, when ;may, the lack of surety as to where they biotic. Inevitable. Definition on paper used glance and a steady hand are all the dynamic of the visual over the aural is not my pictures are the fodder of text-honk might go next. drove families to pun terse occurs because of what it isn't. Hues mean tools of a good photographer. The subject sustainable. Lust. or whatever that thing manufacture and medical scrutiny, all this single images that kept each corpse in per- something because they are juxtaposed is often irrelevant. But not always. wits that pushed rye to the desire of kee- philosophy wilts away. I began my job as manent stasis. Decay is not a worry for with what they are not. Eserything Mer- 1 occasionally allow myself the luxury ping their visage in a photo: dwindled and a post-mortem technician it fee y ears after that which is not organic. Crazing upon ges, Lite. Death. Life. Death. of nostalgia and dream of my schooling rotted away after a month or two at the my education ended. I was draen into it these images. still, as traumatic. Yet, beau- Death. years. At university, pictures - capturing - most. This is where the animal kingdom as a last mean. It encompassed my art, in a tiful. Here sits one so loved that their The light front the flashbulb sticks to became my sole motive for my staying holds us to waren. Their displays. their Mariner of speaking. It would lx a loot he- image is captured forever. i shared this your eyes the way the smell of formalde- away from the comforts of home. The dances, their subtle tips or beaks or winga dge or a stepping stone. Twenty years sentiment but nut through real love. Thro- hyde does to your clothing. Like a layer of single certainty, that I clung onto like a or snouts or heads or legs can erase the later, it has become the exact opposite of ugh mere fascinating and adoration of celluloid in my pictures, it can't help but burr, was that beauty could never be con- need for a thousand words. They are vocation. form. Of aesthetic. Of the truth of the hint ai the future, tained on a sheet of paper. But an attempt drawn in and freed in such brevity of time A fad of the nineteenth century was the physical. By Eliot Hughes to share the idea of beauty with those who that their courtship was a mete blip in their daguerreotype. a slow photographic pro- .My work does not follow. suit. The would, and can, let their minds fill in the existence. And that's where we have them cess which produced almost permanent pictures of car-crash victims are not rot the Balance is a short story and is aesthetic gaps was what became my dri- to ransom. We are able to capture direst: images, The issue with benefit of anyone, Violent society has pro- entirely fictional. If you have ving Force. Every boyfriend I had. I had to sexual, sensual and gorgeous momenta in modern phoutgraphs is duced a wealth of violent deaths. And it is some creative writing you would capture. A purely shallow lust was oftenti- something leas frail and unreliable than their tendency to my job to visually describe their symp- like to see in Leeds Student send mes the draw. And. when I had them. it our ammonia.. wither and fade_ toms. In image. In colour, To he dissected it to: t! •

Illustration by Mark Mackay 24 Leeds Student www.le-edsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 Albums The soundtrack of your degree As the prospect of full-time employment dawns on those in their final year, what better way to take a trip down memory lane than to count down the 10 albums of the last three years that have provided you with the soundtrack to your degree?

Digital Ash in a 113 Morning. Digital Ash reached much Begin to Hope melodies and intennitant peraxis of fluid, 1 0 ■further inside the human psyche, Igr ■angelic singing in an unparalleled fashion. Digital Urn unnerving its listeners with its surrealist Regina Spektor Her pure vet 20-a-day hardened voice Bright Eyes narratives, its inspired use of sampling, as is the stamp of originality on this album cracked vocals, the heartbreaking strings ot cotase. argue that this album is and should simultanesiusly silence that drowned the cold isolation of 'Down little more than a 'sell out' and a pilor sceptics and woo those looking fur a Rabbit Hole' and dared us to dream and imitation of its 'calgier' ptirdecessom. 'something a link bit different' who are to drool over '1 Believe In Symmetry'. Sadly for those who subscribe to the 'I not prepared to stray too far away from Elsewhere, the album made you dance knew her when she was nothing' school. the safety of Coldplay/piano/heanbreak and cry all at once. like a twisted their tragic pursuit of unpopular music for format. Those, however, who see beyond puppeteer. 'Hit the Switch' was absolute the sake of it will distract them from the the obvious merit of her voice and into the in its whiskey-soaked despair: 'Arc of glaringly obvious individuality and impressive and original songwriting style Time' was probably the nearest thing effervecence of Begin to Hope and that ranges from lo-fi on 'Edit' to stadium Bright Eyes had ever made to crank (and. consequently deny them the delights of rock on Better' and then to playful and perhaps thankfully, still is): 'Ship in a Spek tor's seamless amalgamation of humorous joke-folk on 'That time' will Bottle' manipulated babies crying and heart-on-the-sleeve piano ballads and find an album that oozes charm and style orchestral stabs over an alt.-country sprightly and playful anti-folk. and is both original and experimental - hacking. 'Light Pollution' was the most Where as many of those loyalists insist whilst remaining a suibtable candidate for straightforward electropop song on the that songs such as 'On the Radio' and listening to in the car on the way home Not as revolutionary. with hindsight, as a album, sonically, but its lyric again 'Fidelity' are examples of Spektor from a Radiohead gig, lot of its comemporanes made out. Digital documented real, breathing human succumbing to the petits of writing her In listening to Begin to Hope. Ash in a Digital Urn was not so mach beings. which is what Conor Oberst has music in the key of $$$$. they are, in fact. however, please expect to find yourself notable for its serrated synthesisers and always been so effective at doing. tributes to the versatility of her style. The casually ejaculating 'SO CHEAP AND electronic soondseapes as for the bleak In a year remembered for James Blunt elever. twitchy vocal patterns which often JUICY' next time someone offers you a claustrophobia of the emotional spaces and Coldplay, Bright Eyes re-wrote the sound as if she is choking on her dinner tangerine. Surely. the mark of a great that it catalogued. Contrary to its more rules and raised the stakes. combine brilliantly with staccato piano album. succesful sister release Ira Wide Awake,

The Eraser Swan'. The title track is equally ■difficult to immediately pigeon-hole. LP Thorn Yorke combining wafting and typically frustrated vocals with fragmented In the wait for Radiohead's seventh and perculiarly timed piano chords album, addicts were given a much not too dissimilar to those on needed fix in the shape of Thom 'Pyramid song'. Yorke's intelligent solo effort. Fans Perhaps the only downfall of The of the Warp records electro which Eraser is its often annoyingly overt provides Yorke with much of his political intention, most notably on recent inspiration will be left 'Harrowdown but such is the disappointed but, for the rest of us. understated beauty and minimalist The Eraser is beautifully brilliance of the musical characteristic of the kind of melodic accompaniment, we'll let him off: experimentalism which sass his hand after all, he is a God. move from angst-ridden Brit-pop rejects to world conquering pioneers of contempory popular music. The simplicity of songs like 'Atoms for peace' is something of a welcome antidote to the multiraious nature of Radiohead's music and 7 Demon Days indeed, it has received a great deal of It is difficult to listen to Demon candidly exposes the honesty of ■Gorillaz attention and has produced the Days without recoiling, such is the Yorke's lyrics and the beauty of his majority of the Radio I playlist for extent to which it has been voice. Indeed, this is something of a the last year. overplayed. There is very little one theme to the album. Following the success of Damon The combination of the indie- can say about the album that hasn't Bleeps and blips created on a Albarn's first run with the gang of based. unmistakable vocals and already been said; however, you can laptop are arranged with subtle beats nightmarish cartoon musicians. songwriting of Albarn with various rest assured that these well crafted Demon Days and often hypnotic bass notes in a was always likely to be hip-hop and rap artists is something and intersting genre transcending fashion which transcends the electro as impressively innovative and that Gorillaz have very much made songs have been indelibly etched into resourceful as its predecessor. genre. 'The Clock' is more Led their own: certainly, they weren't the your memory, and rightly so, A Zeppelin than it is Four Tet, the latter The importance and merit of this first, but they're definitely one of the likely source of post-mil nostalgia in having a tangible influence on 'Black album should not he disregarded: best. the coming years. Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 25 Albums Cultured

Arular ghetto myth its probably 'ens you're Takk cannot fail to bring a tear to the eye, and U ■M.I.A. too busy bopping to the minimal *J ■Sigur Ros proves that a catchy chorus is not the only Peaches-esque electro orchestrated way to sell records. by her main man DJ Diplo. As What perhaps makes TukA so For the disease of here-today-gone- 'Galang' opens with Maya shoutine Few bands of the last three years have remarkable is the way in which it acts less tomorrow indie bands. M.1.A's belle in Jamaican-English patois 'London managed to produce music on a similarity as a pop album and more as continuous funk via electro via grime debut calling/ speak the slang now/ Boys monstemus scale to Sigur Ros and, even score, presumably to accompany some tread a life spent growing up say wha gwanf Girls say wha/ Get if they have, they certainly haven't heart-rendering, art-house. short film between Sri Lanka, New York and down!' over blaring trumpets and a managed to turn them it a work of beauty about climate change or something, And London) Arular is the perfect fuzzy beat, you get the idea this is to parallel Takk. remedy. Over in just thirty-eight the eclectic and contradictory blend is that not the key to a great album? Sure, minutes. Maya Arulpragasam's of global pop envisaged by a post- The obvious stand-out track is found it has tracks that stand up on their own album manages to lit in a handful of London Calling The Clash. Gorillaz' in the form of Planet Earth title track. merit. most notably the the best pop songs of 2005 with Demon Days sounds like a Guardian 'Hoppipolla'. something which serves to 'Andvari' and the tormented and 'Bucky Done Gun'. 'Sunshowers' reading white boy's attempt at going epitomise the graceful manner in which explosive 'Slieglopur', but this is first and and 'Galant!' all dancefloor fillers. If ghetto compared with this ultimately the Icelandic four-piece have brought foremost an album best listened to in you don't buy into the daughter of a unclassifiable party starter_ post-rock into the mainstream without order and in one sitting as an Tamil Tiger/childhood spent in the compromisine the grandiose and intricate accompaniment for an hour or two of nature of the genre. Although Tokk casual day dreaming. A particularly certainly sees Sigur Ros moving towards dangerous album to listen to when innocuous!'. 'North American Scum' is a more commercially viable and accesible revising, but flawless, nonetheless. A Sound of Silver sound. it is still a collection of songs that "2 • LCD Soundsystem this album's 'Daft Punk. is Playing at my House'. Murphy trades intelligent lyrics defending his native NYC from post-9111 With &wad of Silver, James Murphy has. Illinoise Look underneath the house there, find the US bashing (It's the furthest you can live in many respects, made an album few In ing things rotting fast in their sleep from the government uh huh huh( Some ■Sufjan Stevens remarkably similar to his last. All the of the dead.' Stevens remembers the serial proud American Christians might same reference points are here, from killer's victims before revealing his great disagree/ But New York's the only place Talking Heads (the heavily chorused Sufism Stevens' second mime in his skill for relating the historical in the we're keepin' them off the street') over vocals of 'Get innocuous') to Brian Eno project to make an album for each US personal 'but in my best behaviour. i am crunchy guitar and synths, If you can get i'Watch the Tapes') to The Velv et state initially sounds dangerously familiar really just like him/ Look beneath the past the opening lyrical clanger, and it Underground (the piano lament of 'New to 2003's Michigan: all horn floorboards for the secrets I have hid'. takes some doing. then you will be treated York I Love You') but this never strays arrangements and soaring vocals. This comes across as affecting rather than to the real gem of the album, moving in too close to the stale of pastiche. lestead. However. when this familiarity takes the emu in comparison to that other purveyor the space of seven. minutes from stripped Sound o/ Silver is the product of a irUifl form of epic opener 'The Black Hawk of the heartstrings. Conor Oberst. I'm down rock vibe to a deep trance climax. who has listened to the right people at the War'. a mystical telling of the bloody Wide Awake. It's Morning conies across This is followed by the Broodwass right time and, with consideration. has return of the Sac and Fox native Indian as self-obsessed and introspected musical-like coda of 'New York I Love produced the musical missing link. tribes to Illinois amidst the gargline and compared to Stevens' admissions of You' ending in full bring-die-house- More than a few of these tracks are eddying strings of the illinoisemaker weakness and empathy. down style. great: some already feel like classics. choir, you'll probably stop weir vine. For one of the best songs you've ever Pieces of rock music that make such a Opener "Get Innocuous' starts in a way This album is all about the history of heard then please see 'Chicago', an off- suaement are few and far between. Dance that some fans may find slightly too Illinois through minute detail. Nowhere is beat and magnificently orchestrated music that works played live, in a club or Familiar. Yes. he is actually ripping off his this more apparent than the hare (for anthemic ejaculation of beauty that puts through speakers is virtually non-existent, own drum heat. The track builds kvith Wien) 'John Wayne Gacv. Jr.' which even the Arcade Fire to sheltie. Truly, this With Some/ of Silver. LCD Soundsystem duel drums/drum machine attack towards remembers that darkest of chapters in is a bellies's album and received nowhere have achieved both of then. bleney Wang's vocal exclamation 'Get Illinois' history over faint piano and near the attention it deserved, Expect guitar: 'His neighbours. they adored him !taste brilliance in Caiifisrnia later in the for his humour and his conversation, year. Silent Alarm Singles 'Helicopter' and 'Banquet' LI ■Bloc Party need no introduction. although the latter deserved to soundtrack everyone '.s 1 Funeral sexual awakening. ■ To a mixture of surprise and relief. East Surely the album's centrepiece. ip Arcade Fire London's Peel-championed post- though: is 'This Modem Love'. Its everything quartet with the amazing vast. thick tangle of melancholic vocal With the recent global success of Arcade drummer and the little-boy-lost vocals strands sounds as though it has leapt Fire's latest album Neon Bible, finally, it about sex came up with an album so straight out of the album cover - would seem that they are beginning to biting in its commentary and so freezing. bleak, sparse, bright white. receive the kind of recognition they have powerful in the delivery of its narrative Russell Lissack's sickeninidv moving deserved since the discreet irleace of their that it seemed. to he. the voices of a guitar work so natural and Matt Tong's debut Funeral, thousand dissatisfied workers, citizens. organic drumming so perfeeds fitted For those of us who made the lovers and adults, whilst sounding Like. that you could be forgiven for not pfigimage to Manchester Academy in giddy teenage excitement, a hangover. noticing anything at all apart from the May 21X)5 to see this mysterious group of a divorce settlement. It was near sheer feeling that the song instilled: arty-types from Montreal, it is quite impossible to put a handle on exactly Okereke made every hair stand on end simply impossible to suggest that any what Silent Alarm did to us, but we and. made every lost soul feel other band has emerged over the last three surfaced after fifty minutes gasping for vindicated. years that has the ability to silence a room air and grateful to be alive and angry to 'The Pioneers' and 'Price of of rowdy northerners on only their third be alive and merely alive. Gasoline' revealed a harsh, cynical gig on UK soil or conjure up the kind of A complex. unforgiving, web of edge to the band's political position emotion and euphoria thin Arcade Fire human emotions. its juddering, while maintaining the image of that produce night in night out as standard. As percussive introduction crash lands into snow-covered plane of magic and they sell out gig after gig in 2007 on the the streamlined. bleeding heart of 'Like fright. Breakthrough single 'So Here hack of their latest release, it is imperative Eating Glass' - can YOU hear the bass We Are' builds and builds into an that we remember that Funeral is where it dance beat and. of course, the familiarly Backseat'. Particularly in the latter, we are note under the first verse? - whose electric, transcendent affirmation of all began. etratie and strained. yet deceptkely. treated to music that is beyond subdued filtered closing minute of addictive. what it is to be in love and to be alone Beginning with the distant, restrained melodic screatnings of Win Butler. yet immensly encouraging. and that is as revolving guitar texture and vocal starts and to not care. At the beginning of piano melodies of 'Neighbourhood I Whilst 'Neighbourhood 2 (Lukas' much an uplifting affirmation of life as it sent shivers down absolutely 2005 - and every time we played Silent (Tunnels)', Win Butler's distinctive, raw is a cathartic chronicle of the tragedy of everything. Kele Okereke or Ian Alarm - Bloc Party made music matter vocals document an original and death. There has not been an album in the Curtis? The line was decidedly blurred. again. delightfully abstract love story. The 2.1st century that manage.~ to transcend so orchestra of various instruments many genres and break so imaginatively relentlessly pursue a climax throughout with the conventions of modern popular the song and are constantly seconds away music. Both lyrically and musically, it is from the inevitable explosion which almost beyond words, literally: it is finally conies in the tom] of a soaring and impossible to do justice to the beauty and harrowing outm of evocative vocal originality of the music in the clumsy and howlings. Straight hack to the start, Ilaccid communicative medium of text. please. You listen to Funeral and feel as if 'Rebellion/Lies' follows a similar you have just had your soul spring- pattern of emotive progression. but with cleaned but you can't quite work our why. the welcome addition of a thudding house Truly the best album of the last three heat that has seen the song creep into the years and hopefully the soundtrack of live set of the Chemical Brothers. also manages to pack something of a your degree. if it wasn't, then stop 'Neighbourhood 3 (Power Out)' also sees disguised indie disco punch. the real listening to Neon Bible for n second and a (fancier side to Arcade Fire, this time brilliance of Funeral can be found in such go and get it immediately. If an album combining a simple yet furious repetitive songs as the swooning, choral 'Wake Up' could ever change your life then surely guitar riff with a commanding and orignai and the tormented, soaring in the this is il. 26 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007

noise and heavy guitar rifling, and (lams Singles the way for a succession of MN classics. Track three. 'Survivalism', the first single 'Precious Time' is the forthcomine from the album, is a dissonant and noisy single from Brighton five-piece The affair: perhaps the closest comparison Maccabees. This may he cynical. but would he to some of the more electronic doesn' t the highly enunciated. moments on Further Down the Spiro/. Suspiciously rife. southern twang Another likely candidate flu a single. eurrenils 'Capital G' is in the bracket of instant employed by classic, a half-speed. bleeping and bellow whining broadside against complacency Brightonians and idiocy in American politics. Other The Kook s. hot songs such as 'The Greater Good' drift new things away from the industrial sound more into Cajun Dance the realms of trip-hop and the elector Party, Jack work of Mr Oi/.0. The final song 'Zero MARK RONSON Pcnate and Sum' is delightfully bleak. offering only a Version various others (Columbia) album from the band. It describes a slither of redemption for the story the make you wonder if there's a factory NINE INCH NAILS believable near-future. totalitarian album tells. somewhere. perhaps in Brighton...? Year Zero As one of Bntain's more famous ex-pat America where all civil liberties have 'Throughout the album, mcmosyrith The softer, more sensitive iade rtf (Interscope) pniducers, Mark Ronson has been been cast aside and the country is run as a bass lines rumble along with distorted Brand New conies out in their first building up a reputation for his DJing and police state. While With Teeth was an drum machines, whilst wailing, dissonant major release from the recent album For Nine Inch Nails, waiting live years production skills for the last 10 years, angst-tilled exorcism of Reznor's drug guitars seep through the computer bleeps The Devil And God Are Itaitirty for a new album isn't out of the ordinary. starting out in New York clubs and addiction and rehab. this is a highly and samples. Never descending into self- Inside Me, 'Jesus' is a delicate. That Trent Reznnr. Nine Inch Nails' front moving on to parties for the rich and politicised and far angrier record. indulgence. the record is tight and kept on troubled. vocally intense. 4.5 minute man and driving force, has managed to famous (P,Diddy? Check. Gucci in Familiar motifs and recurring themes track by Rector's pop sensibility, making ballad that deals with the time-old knock out two albums within two years of Milan? Why not?). Known for houndary pop up in Year Zero as much as any NIN Year Zero a lean, mean, hate-filled question of what happens after we each other (the last one being 2.005's With crossing sets which take in everything albuni, but the fact this is a concept album machine of an album, which is exactly die, in a moving and relevant way. Teeth) is nigh on a miracle. from hip hop to 60s psychedelia, and gives the record a different feel. With less what it should be. (8) The main guitar line is a little Year Zero is the band's sixth full- having released Here Comes The Fir to emphasis on personal and emotional repetitive. but in a way that helps the Weill album. and marks a return to the critical success, Mark Ronson's follow up trauma. and with a more politicised tune resemble a sort of dark lullaby synth-driven, noise-ridden trucks of Du. conies heavily anticipated_ content. Remo shows he is not content to that is really quite beautiful. The Downward Spiral, but it is also a With Version comes something that merely tread water, The oddly titled first tension that builds throughout the departure in that it is the first true concept can claim a fairly original niche in the song 1-lyperpowerr is a crescendo of By Carl Barrowclough song, simmering just beneath the market place: a selection of covers, it is surface. never largely backed by a funky, percussive raise an eyebrow here. but the mix of and 'I've Known for Long' are three breaks into ALBERTA CROSS production which leaves the 'Ooh Wee' folk, blues and iodic that the likes of melodic ballads containing sweet singer Jesse The Thief and the Heartbreaker hip _hop of before, whilst boasting a Kings of Leon currently do hest is a harmonies and swooning guitars that Lacey 's (Fiction) diverse range of guests. And what guests. timeless form of guitar pop not to be won't howl you over but will trademark, It seems that all those hours spent mixing sneered at. A short album with only certainly get your foot tapping. 'Old tormented 4- . *Pa I. with the good and great in pop today seven tracks, the general feel of The Man Chicago' belongs on a Counting shriek us most bagged him a list of stars not many others Thief and the Heartbreaker is a Crows album but is perhaps the most of their songs could afford. Having produced for Amy tribute to love lost, heartbreak and 1st-walls interesting track. do. His self- Winehouse and Lily Allen. you can only musical times gone by. The album's reminiscent of the strangest Beatles control presume Ronson used his charms and is first and title track is a decent. mid- songs. It's possible to hear the visible, and a far cry from the Brand reputation in netting the likes of Robbie paced tribute to Neil Young and band's cited influences 'The Band New boys of 2001. who penned the Williams and Paul Smith. That said, an Crazy Horse with a cool rove, and Van Morrison on occasion. lyrics 'Girl, come to me. the only- k' A-list of talent doesn't nes:manly an - :11LT-7-1 it,111111'\ gm lines and it •solid especially in the closing track 'The broken-hearted loser you'll ever album make (see Audioslave), and so the chorus. Songwriters Penes Ericson Devil's All You Ever Had' which sine:Mon arises: is the album as good as need.' Stakee and Terry Wolfer!. then take it builds through over six minutes into She's one of those pop princesses you the sum of its parts? up a notch with the melancholic set a euphonic climax, aided by what can't quite make your mind up about- The sadly inevitable answer is yes and curiously uplifting 'Lucy. Rider', a sounds like a giant gospel choir. So, should we love her or hate her.' Is she no. Leaving behind the comparatively summery. up-tempo tune which whilst it's tempting to label this talented or, well, not? Sophie Ellis- safe world or hip hop behind. Mark introduces us of the extent of album nu-folk, nr nu-blues or Boffiur returns after three years away Ronson whips nut his eclectic bag 01 Stakee's yearning vocal talents. IL anything that implies complete ith a new album and this, its second tricks and thaws 'uptown. funk and big Alberta Cross, are an East-London sounds suspiciously like any thing derivation. Alberta Cross are doing beat into the mix, with no shortage of single. 'Me and My Imagination'. It's written by The Thrills, another band something worth listening to; formulaic and sounds a little hit based hand formed just over six brass hacking things up. The opening that pays homage to the American something 'nu', but riot new ... (Si teeny-bop: she does have a very months :e2o, who produce it sound track 'God Put a Smile upon Your Pace' greats. but that isn't necessarily a distinctive and pretty voice. though. fro:a the American underwhelms and is a sign of buss had thing. 'Hard breaks. Low Man'. By Helena Goodwy n The Noisettes are undoubtedly. cool. hintcriand cocsi Witt Some may necessary the V.I.P. list of friends is; The mix of raunchy guitars, soulful. although Ronson's take on Coldplay bonnees along amicably enough, it lacks powerful vocals and the kind of diet.; are asealators for the steep bits MR. HUDSON AND THE the real power that a cover needs to stand bored, furious lyrics Kele Okereke and Little Chefs every few miles. would he proud LIBRARY Haoc people not had cnotitth of the alongside its original. Conisivtinelv. In gem'? Lily Allen of serve to make A Tale of Two Cities work/club/love lyrics popularised by to cover 'Oh My God'. the producer manages pulls off an 'Scratch Your Lily Allen and The Rakes? In places. absolute coup. maximising on the singer Name' the lyrics are passable. If a little Music is (lambing dots n there ;IT:: nn ability to mix the sultry with indiffinence whooping. staiss : 'triple-tdate the cold town two ways about it iii au effort a. ∎ and attitude with pop, Rothe:moms whopping hit my soul: Mr. Hudson sings on appeal to more and more people, Radiohead's 'Just' is squeezed lurid! the 'Dinosaur Egg' 'Brace The Cold', one ot the .1 artists frequently draw on numerous funk it never knew it had: Thom who'.' As is based lin a IbUM many tracks that ale genres, creating a musical mish- with these last two tracks:, when the song David Mil ig icy a to WItleMbrr within mash that will hopefully sell more cartoon. Scout NUM briags it to minutes of hearing them_ being covered is given a new direction records. This can he good. and it can and allowed to break out from its life w It the distincttve ducal Singles 'Bread and RfiSes. and he had. hut, unfortunately. Mr, melodies and minimal ringer pieking 'Too Late Too Late' ate a little :mire predecessor. things are most likely to be Hudson's offering sits, slap hang in she made her own Ott 2005's lively, but the album soon slips into snecessful. This originality is pushed the middle, inspiring no strong further with 'Stop Me'. the lead single Ktilkhapped By Neprunr. As usual. a monotonous rut. 'Picture Of You'. feelings either way. Like Lily Allen Scout's soaring, unhineed slit: all) 'Ghost' and 'Upon The Heath' all which combines The Smiths with The before him, Mr- Hudson mixes seem to %NB:L.1.4e, stream Of- !dead inn, one Icing afternoon sat in Supremes"You Just Keep Me Hanging everyday tales of life in the coy consctouncis- like. all over the the lounsc rl your parents' friends' On'. The work ill a producer who knows with,., well, I don't know what It s sparse instrumentation to 1111.tililig 'hoist: while they drink tea and talk how to merge older sounds. it creates soft-RnB-jaat-lounge sty le inns's. effect. about The Guardian This kind tit stvnething genuinely new and exciting. and the fact is that you barely notice The idea of Mr Hudson vs. SWAY music is created to fill the gaps in However. in 'The Only One I Know' it, it's so quiet and unassutning. seems bizarre. One a recent noted Radio l's schedule, and, if you like lurks the danger that Ronson risks. The This failing could he covered it ours eyor of a tough, urban sound, the s, air load bland, your colours grey song just isn't able to explode like the the erstwhile Mr. Hudson had other a 'nail who looks entirely at .tad your musk: uninspiring, then original does: the cx-Take That man fails home peddling his polite dinner-room something new to deliver vocally or yt +Lill definitely like a Tate of Tao to match the Burgess swagger and fulls lyrically hut, unfortunately, his jars on Later with Jools Holland. Cities Although 'like' is prohas,[ ■ on his face. It is in this combination of doesn't London-its fleeted vocals are ,a,'t et, somehow, it fail. too strong a wind ior you. isu songs that Mark Ronson both shines and disarmingly similar to everything t completely if onb, because the t7! underwhelms. Though by no means respective performers keep safely in we've heard before. Again. not sit consistently brilliant, Version is original, their ow n sections of the song much of a problem if he had a lot to interesting and funky enough to get away deliver lyrically, but he treads a By Owen Clements with its mistakes, (7) By Helena Goodwyn & Joe Dennett lyrical path so well travelled that By John Owens X47 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 27 Music The beaten track Smooth Opera-ator THE KBC Anymore'. Track three. 'Trippin', is Bizet's Carmen the sort of last-paced. guitar driven On The Beat LUU OperaSoc (High Voltage) tune you might expect to hear in 0 dingy little indie club where the Riley Smith Thursday 19th April The KBC hail from Preston and have lyrics 'trippin' on acid...' would he been together for three years. Their greeted with shouts of 'f*Iting right There are several things that an amateur sound is firmly rooted in the groovier mate' it's not as strong as the first should never try. Amongst these are fire end of indie-pop. similar to The two songs. but it still demands your attention. 'Test the Water'. their juggling and. arguably. performing an Sunshine Underground and the more opera. Bizers Camen is a tale of passion. upbeat side of Bloc Party. So far. latest single. sounds a little muffled vocally; perhaps the desired effect. betrayal and the fickle nature of human they have supported acts as big as relationships, and you would be forgiven The Strokes and played alongside but it starts to give the impression of an overproduced mess. especiall y for thinking that a student society would others like The Padclingtons and not he able to convincingly portray the my the breakdown. when the delayed vocals just sound a hit 90s pop. mature emotions required to give a good performance. However, having seen LIEU cry 'Days of Disillusion' has, initially, Opera Society's rendition. I can assure 5, less of the drum-machine. techno feel of its predecessors, but soon kicks you that they can. From the opening into what begins to he an all too minute of act. one. the audience were ILi drawn into the world of the singers who, sea familiar disco sound. 'Pride Before The Fall'. The KBC's second single for a relatively small group, produced hack in early 2006, is a slightly more remarkable polyphonic melodies throughout. ; interesting track, which pulls away accents fond a veto( obviously drawn-on from the trance/dance feel or other A story of unrequited love and that during a dancing scene with her Love hearth had the people. around me in songs and is, instead, an impressive. passionate gesture. the opera begins with interest Don Jose (Moms) that there were 3 stitches. and the wildly camp, sparkly guitar-propelled piece of furious pop an exchange between a brigade of soldiers some tincOmfortable laughs around the blue sequinned matador outfit donned by music. The amusingly titled and the girls at a nearby cigarette factory. Riley Smith. Her singing ranged fnim an 'Sherlock Grooves Holmes` is dark. The two-part melodies between the sexes incredible Oporto style to husky tones of Escamillo for his bullfight (where did groove-intense, and altogether one of were solidly enacted. the opposing styles indifference, and the image of Carmen its they get that?) the best tracks on the album. Next of singing and lyrics capturing the eSSelll.e a heartless temptress was well played. The perk-in-name was sung beautifully, with a strong support from the up. however. is 'Zeitgeist'. meaning of the opera as a difference between the Soldier Don lose, the victim of such 'spirit of the time', Unfortunately, genders. indifference. was played strongly, with excellent chorus, a well-thought-out erformed this may be a bit overreaching on The principal roles were p murderous passion by the ending fit you choreography and spot-on orchestral The KBC's part, as their synth-based. with conviction and vigour. the audience catch my drill), tension nom which built performance. If anything let it down, it techno-indie-pop sounds a bit dated often notably taken aback in the quality of throughout the final act, and love interest would be the acting. which only 'Forward, Russia! at Glastonbury. the female voices. Elaine Tate's Carmen toreador Beatiiillo (For) had an occasionally tended to look wooden from Their debut album On The Beat kicks already. The last two tracks aren't worth mentioning, Which is a shame. was captivatingly portrayed. with so unbelievably poweiful voice which some characters. But. with such little at off with the funky guitars and bizarre convincing a perforMance that the matched the proud personality of his fault, and having begun with Such a lyrics of 'Poisonous Emblem'. and because there are some great songs on this album - just not enough to audience struggled to focus on any other character well. challenging open, this society can only then slides effortlessly in to the aspect of the opera. even when her However. the audience's lavourite go from strength to strength. (8t cymbal crashing_ bass thumping. and keep you interested. (7) character took a back seat. Her performance came from the two synth trilling wonder that is 'Not By Helena Goodwyn performance became so intensely sultry smugglers, whose random cockney By Alex Doorey

WILD BEASTS/ Playing tonight in support of their Arctic Monkeys VIDEO NASTIES second single. 'Through Dark Night'. Sheffield Leaciroill which is released this week on Bad Sunday 22nd April The Faversham Sneakers records, the band are in high Saturday 21st April spirits. thanking the Faversham crowd. revealing they've been waiting a long I arrived in the already bustling SHEF.11-LLD. SREF-PI-ELD, tune for such a vibrant reception. as Lac ersheir just in rime for Video SHEF-FI-ELD"! Oh yes, you know contrast to their last visit to the when you're at an Arctic Monkeys gig, Nastics 171. as Maximo Park-esque indie- hoer-sham for NaistyFest. svliere the 1roll quintet. Aged 18, the quirky especially if it's in their home town on sparse crowd didn't provide remelt the eve of their critically acclaimed and twosome dominated the stage with their encouragement for the Kendal (the boys' synth-led songs ca t teenage life - 'I really much anticipated follow up to 2006's original home) fruitcakes. Hayden Whatever People S'ay low.. The tiny want to hold you. I really want to make Norman Thorpe's antique. falsetto and. at yeti mines. The songs are nothing I..eadmill is literally thenbuts. with times, operatic vocals serenade and howl excitement and football terrace revolutionary. or even anything new at at the Faversham's growing crowd with all. hut. despite this, they are quality pop chanting so, when the baud emerge tin songs such as 'The Old Dog' and 'Please stage to the sound of it waltzing string songs that gel the night into full swing. Sir'. Making the trendy girls at the hack Headlining tonight is a local talent - quartet. there is something of a dance along slightly drunkenly Inoue of temporary and subdued Iambi a calm the eccentric and unique Wild Beasts. this 'nu-rave' rubbish). However. despite before the storm of inevitable beer who. as well its }vinr signed to Win:. the band's obvious talents. the set does heaveyweight label Domino, have throwing and jeering that erupts when begin to drag. with the Wild Beasts self- best reethooes or the evening, woh 'Do me a favour' is as expertly recently been tipped for success by the Alex Turner and the boys launch into declared 'wishy washy' style beginning stunningly accurate drumming (a re. precise as ii is on the album and likes of the NME and Steve Lamaece their first track and latest single to wear thin. (6) `Brianstore. curring theme throughout the set) and suprisingly fails to generate much of a with their first single. the perfectly The set unfolds in a somewhat frantic singalengs. adequately proving response from the crowd. clearly danceable 'Brave Bulging Buoyant By Sarah Greene obvious fashion and balances new that the Monk.eys' older - work is not hungry for something more italic disco Clairvoyants' being voted single of the Photo by Maria Gurbutt-Lueeru material with old classics such as going to age quite as quickly as many friendly. The same can he said of week on Itis 6 Music radio shim. 'Mardy Burn'. 'Fake Tales of San of us had initially thought. 505'. a subtle and understated attempt Fransisco' and 'I Bet You Look Good The reason everome is here. at something a little less .quessive, bun on the Danceflonr.. What is most though, is to hear oleo lamer or of without being dull or self indulgent. Supristrig tonight is Not well the more have been up el ut thy last :,.ear tucked Aithouelt perhaps playing in as the last prim] and basic older songs stand up away in a I natuntlly, they are not !OAg was a hit pretentious. next to the more intelligent and left wanting. -Teddy Picker' It iti diffieult to nfeende whin to make experimental tracks from Favourite demenstrates a mesh higher level of of Arctic Monkeys now, Yes. they arc Worm. NiOnnarr. They still pack a hel l live enemy Mao is apparent on the mouthy and aggressive million sprites of a punch and command even the album verston eontures more of a hat nt rile same time, you get the most tightlipped. Home Counties. dance than helm ire from allyone who fu=eling dial. as the,, are maturing into Bjork Ian to slur and sway wildly. has prev karst!. Ward it anti. Wiese me. their early- lwciii cs. their music is However, the lei-down here is that they Oars(' mitt haven't clrovntoaded at least following suit. Floweret. whilst they almost sound too good.. 'They have sonic of the album ate iii a minority 1110114.1C to tread the Ilrrr of thrashy clearly become well polished by years tonight. one would surely.. expect. crash indie rock hump better than any of touring and now scent less 'Who'd want ro he men or the people one Cannot help but susped that immediate and energetic as perhaps when there's people like yule' NI. Ft) heir progression into a prolific, world- they did all those years ago in n packed the perspiring masses belt's% the conquering rock hand, t he kind that and sweaty Faversham. crowded stage, highlighting Turner's could 1471ATICT SI{.111l rie:111 nrt outside Still. 'The View from the suprising ability to tackle more well of the northern working class suburbs, Afternoon' and 'Leave before the thought-out lyrical content without is still a long ea) oft. Lights Come On' are far and away the disappearine. up his t,vvn arse. By Jonny Price Friday, April 27, 2007 28 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk WE ARE THE PIPETTES Retro chic revisits the Cockpit as the Pipettes play

The Pipettes night pave-.es With such modern ems rs Why Did You Stay —. 'Judy' and 'ABC' the crowd's cheering never The Cockpit died down. anti the masses of penpte kepi on dancing :may to the songs. Thursday 191h April The g.u1S themselves are lovely to watch — keeping up a cheeky banter Very few hands noxyada!,s ha‘e the with each other and the audience. and power to attract such a diverse el owd keeping the smiles on everyone's faces attended the Cockpit or this gig. There In fact. a wasn't till their resounding were 15-year-old emo girls raneing to encore of 'Pull Shapes' and 'We are the 60-fisht-year-old couples hopping Pipettes' that I even realised I'd been alone to the heal — and every one of there lOr two hours. The many new them positively throbbing with tracks they played still kept up the excitement and anticipation. raffle dazzle that these girls are LINi For those of you not in Ihe music becommg known for. and proved that knok% (where hate you been?"). The this aces cull got some pretty hefty Pipettes are three fantastic yet lees. wonderfully :(ring girl, from Li definitely recommend seeing Brighton. rvliose pop punk st) Ic gents them a you ever get the chance (you hack to the 'drive-m- rock' u'roll era of could prObahly catch lie• next leg of the 50's. Bursting onto the stage with their European tour if you're quick). Kesses.Are Wasted on Me'. the -y.itre Now where can I get a ticket iv crowd went abst timely dd Idl and damn. Munich'? right they sh01114.( — these girls defirliwly loiow him to put on a show.. As the By Bard Megerisi oops... last week's paper was wrongly credited to Sophie flames. Our sincere apt+ 0,ties ur C.-Marione Also t Ruth Jones for tailing to credit Coleman. whose splendid Fresh Jive her for her DJ Tango photo, what can we Breakthincing ehanipionships review in say? We're rubbish.

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Intel, the Intel logo, Centring and the Centrino logo, Intel Core and Core Inside. are trademarks or registered trademarks or Intel Corporation or its subsidiaries in the United States and other countries. Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 29 The Big Smoke the rant

We tentatively explore a life beyond Leeds... In era where all things guitar You've paid good money for a ticket, based reign it is impressive that and one would hope that you attend a gig hould you ever, astonishingly cup of tea but this crowd weren't Fabric, the mecca of dance when out of a love of music and not 'to be want to escape Leeds, clubbing complaining, quickly adjusting their dance was cool has continued to seen'. Surely you would want to make the S capital. then your best bet is the dance moves from respectable to thrive. It's all thanks to their ability to most of your expenditure. not spending big LDN. Since the theme is large then outlandish to fit the eclectic music adapt to the changing environment. your time doing something that you could Fabric perfectly fits the bill. Fabric is policy. like a monkey but a bit less crucial to he doing better elsewhere! If you want to perhaps the most hyped club in Only a super club with a larger the survival of mankind. Their wallet- chat to your mates then. instead of doing Britain, London's super-club regularly than average ego would dare to lit Erol lining side project in record releasing it amongst a crowd who are not remotely rok its gargantuan proportions with Aiken and Andy C on the same bill but has earned them nut only a tidy pile interested in what you have to say. why the finest of neon-clad new ravers. So, surprisingly the pairing really works. but a reputation for spieling the next not do it at a pub where the drinks are my first visit to the night was coupled Aiken adapted his usually indie/pop big thing with effortless accuracy. much cheaper? Not only is it disrespectful ~kith slight scepticism. would it live up- based set to a bass laden menagerie of With releases from Di Hype. Ralph to the artist who has10 battle through this to its massive reputation? Being underground acts, so underground that Lawson, Plump Ws and Cut Copy the adversity, but it is disrespectful to the greeted by a remix of Gary Numan I, more of a fan of his liOs synth pop label has gone from strength to other gig-goers who wish to watch and 'Cars' and Grandmaster Flash's remixes. hadn't the foggiest what any strength. Perhaps the best thing about listen to ;mask-, instead of listen to a 'White Lines' as you enter a club will of it was. Andy C performed at his the club is the vending machine that mundane debate on the finer points of lust always set you up for a good night and reliable hest with his now well- spews forth cds. Or perhaps the night's soaps. even the extortionate drinks prices, familiar brand of drunt'n'hass that you gigantic sofas that by the end of the I realised the intensity to which I once you'd gulped back various can actually dance to. Writing this it's night are covered with spilt drinks and loathe this most disgraceful of practices at expletives. were made bearable by the struck me that as a clubs editor I am sprawled out bodies like a. had episode recent sold-out Duke Special gig at The eclectic soundtrack. With Riotous surprisingly ill-qualified to talk about of Skins. Faversham. The small. barely-raised Rockers, Scratch Perverts. Kavinsky any of the music I hear at club nights. l Fabric is very big and very fun. it stage Timms that it is difficult to find a all serving up stellar dj sets and Erol am sceptical of anyone though who comes highly recommended for decent viewing spot when the venue is at Alkan and Andy C headlining there actually remembers/knows anything anyone who likes to dance to anything full capacity. I find that this problem is was little chance for a breather before about the various vague genres of indiscriminately, what more is there to particularly serious during the the next dazzlingly brilliant tune was grime, dub, shakey breaks. rub a dub say? perfomianees of support acts, and one of unleashed. Remixes of Jackson 5 with dub sub step or what- not. Buck to the the support acts at this gig. the American Salt'n'Peppa may not he everyone's point. By Sophie Barnes guitarist Stephanie Dosen. creates delicate, intricately-constructed pieces that demand the listener's fall attention to fully appreciate their beauty. Therefore. it was deeply regrettable that a couple of shitted. 30- something gentlemen behind me nattered throughout the entire duration of her Krafty Kuts Dee excellent performance about how they'd changed a flat tyre on one of their cars the previous night. Thankfully, they shut up The beat goes on at the Elbow Rooms once Duke Special came on stage and delivered a spellbinding p•rfermartee, but Kraft), Kuts graced the DJ•shaped much-needed lounging sessions. it has never escaped me that that night stage of Elbow Rooms on Friday, The bar. perhaps the sole downfall whipping the pre-hyped crowd into it of the evening. was perennially could have been even rnere magical if dance frenzy of manic proportions. rammed. making the process of they hadshown greater mspeet. Breaks were the order of the day, as achieving drunkenness somewhat Krafty Kuts spliced beets with traumatic. However drunkenness was By Nicholas Polydor serious panache, commanding his most definitely achieved by certain dancing minions with ease, His spectacularly worse-for wear audience were clearly breaks revellers whose inebriated connoisseurs, appreciative of every stumblings made the soiree all the the ones to deft beat drop. and showing their more entertaining. respect via the medium of crazy- Generally rather more sophisticated dance. Spine-defying shapes were than the usual student Balm crowd, watch thrown as Krafty added unexpected this clientele were dedicated breaks cuts to the mix. challenging the aficionados whose respect for Krafty • Fresh live (e:. Mine Saturday 28th April crowd to risk their very health for the Kuts' DJ skills made this a night of 'Cypher Kings' The Official Afterparty sake of the music. jumping energy. Next time -Krafty of TAG... Me vs. The City. The darkly elegant atmosphere of comes to town. you'd better he ready Bboy antics front IC Tonn and Jonzi D. The Elbow Rooms provided the to dance your shoes to pieces, Expect the hest goddamn lyrical stylings perfect brooding backdrop for a night that have ever been heard ever, Should of energetic behaviour, contrasting By Penelope Smythe be good. the insanity of its dance-Boor with secluded corners for occasional • SoulSauce re' The Elbow Rotims. Wednesday 2nd May Live jazz and soul from this classy night that is far from The Fast Show 'Nice' Home or Away?? cheeriness. features Antonym - a jazz musician from Clubbing at home Clubbing at home and clubbing at Uni taste is catered for. At home and I bet Leeds College of Music are two very different things. For many you are familiar with this situation: the plus-support. and clubbing at of you one is rubbish and one is same variety of music in even the same amazing.. No prizes for guessing which order. If I counted the times I had heard Uni are two very one is which. For one thing the price the Proclaimers "500 miles" at home on Want to write difference is iistounding. The cost of a a night out. i would be it very filet different things. drink can be in the range of f.3.50 and student. for Britain's For many of you; with taxi fares being known to total Whereas before Uni I thought going E30. A week's going out budget at Uni out was the best thing in the world, biggest student one is rubbish and can get you one measly night at home!! now when I go out at home I am even The stze of the club also differs. At more aware that the experience is good newspaper? one is amazing. home. there are some dark, damp holes (because of the people} but it could he No prizes for which the owners try and sell as a so much better. Was l too young to care "club" which in actual fact is the size of that my much loved club was a dive Email Ben on guessing which a village halt compared to UM where Or has UM sullied it fores et' Only time size is a matter of choice. Choice is and graduation will tell one is which probably the most important difference. Leeds in particular offers a rich variety editor@ By Katie Gilliland of music. so whether you're into rave. lsweb.org.uk 77 demo, cheese. hip hop or rock. your 30 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007

The Lives Shooter Starring: Mark Wahlberg, Michael Pena, Danny Glover and Kate Mara Director Antoine Fuqua Certificate: 15 of Others Running Time: 124 minutes

Starring: Martina Gedeck, Ulrich Mahe. Sebastian Koch and Ulrich Tukur o be honest you'll probably have insidious Danny Glover. and a blustering Director: Florian Henkel von Donnersmarek already decided whether or not Ned Beatty as a secret service colonel and Certificate: 15 Tyou want to see this film based on United States senator respectively. Running Time: 137 minutes its title alone. And the piaster image of There's not really much more Mark Waidherie with a rifle does little to that can be said about Shooter without clear things up. Shooter however Is a very mining most of the best hits of the story. clever film and definitely worth the So it is perhaps advisable to talk about an watch. Ii covers a great deal of ground entirely different film The Bourne regarding morality and the responsibilities Ultimatum. Despite being scheduled for a of both the individual and the state. but summer release there has been precious drops diem into the dialogue in such a little promotion for the conclusion to the way that if you're not bothered you can Bourne series and so the unanticipated just concentrate on watching people being appearance of Shower has all the more shot. usually from far away . instead. value as an equally intelligent and The story follow elethlberg's thoughtful addition to the action thriller retired Marine Corps scout smper. Boh genre. Like the Bourne series Shooter has Lee Swagger, and his efforts to choir his its omens in a honk about a Vietnam era name after being implicated in a soldier of extraordinary skill, and again government conspiracy. Helping him are updates the basic premise to the modem the widow of his former observer. played day with expert skill. If you're hungry for by the beautiful Kate Mani, and rookie more Bourne. or even one ctif those Bauer FBI agent Nick Memphis, poi-to-Eyed fans, go see this while you wait. Yon. superbly by the scene stealing Michael won't be disappointed. Pena. Against the three stand% everything Mint that the public aren't were to know their By James Silson government's posses. headed up by an

saw the film of Closer and thought it laugh wanking in the imemet ehatroom was all a hit depressing, following scene. and was captivating in his fury. Closer two couples and four years of Stephanie Wollenberg was suitably romantic betrayal (exhausting). and what childlike. and I hope purposefully A 1. niv ersite of Leeds Theatre Group with Natalie Portman randomly irritating. and Gabby Etlinundes coolness Production announcing she didn't love Jude law held me as did Niek Laurence's witty anymore (font). I advised my friend in a remarks. The costumes were spot on for steady happy relationship to avoid it at these parts. ensuring they were all the all costs, I was surprised to hear the film more believable as doctor, stripper. ield) end Uttered by the only inn-subvereive writers of the %tate, was based on the play by Patrick Mother, photographer and writer. In Awe every la meet featly named Florian However. a high ranking official's Lust I couldn't imagine how the aquarium and performance seemed effortless and Wlienekel von Donnersmarek. for his actress girlfriend. Christa-Maria strip club scenes would work on stage. carrying a suitable load of emotional this film, wet in the Socialist East German Sieland (Martina Gedeeki lead to his flat So when I heard the Theatre Group 'were baggae. in the early KO's. has been receiving rave being monitored by Stasi agent putting it on I was curious to see how the I'd heard reports of slow set reviews, and picked up the Beer feweiren Hauptinann Gerd Wie.slet- (Ulrich Mehee director. Pete Fablanski. would rise to changes but this must have been sorted Language Film Oscar this year. The As he monitors the lives of Dreyman and these challenges. On the night. I tried not by the second night. because there were story centres around the Stasi. the Sieland. Wiesier begins to see them in a to think about the film and go with an no tedious four minute blackouts. My intelligence organisation monitoring the different light. and becomes suspicious of open mind and the interesting stage only complaint would be the length of population relentlessly. Georg Dreyman the moilvt„,, hehind the investigation. space immediately acted as a reminder the stage, the concept was original but (Sebastian Kneh). is an author who is While the rest of the cast is good, that this was something original. The we found ourselves hovering like we had viewed almost universally as one of the Milhe's ability to give his character real audience sat in four rows, two either side some haemorrhoid problem during the emotional depth through facial of a long rectangular space. similar to a strip club scene. That scene was, expressions and physicality drives the catwalk. It felt almost like we were at a incidentally, staged as dassily as it could plot. allowing the development of the fashion show. which suited the modern have been. although there were the few story to feel realistic. The casting is play. At first I admit I was trying to work standard exasperated sighs from My something that can he criticised, although Out who was playing Jude Law's friends when Stephanie Wollenberg This film has the performances am universally good - character, but as actors took their own strutted about in her red underwear. But the characters steen to he pushed towards individual lake on the roles, I was soon she did look good. I'm sure the men in been receiving stereotypes. with the authors and lett welching the action in front of inc. the audience wouldn't have minded dissenters generally portrayed as thin the film a distant memory. getting a bit closer (hobo). The thought- rave reviews, intellectuals. while the government is Closer must have been quite provoking twist at the end and the represented by the grossly fat. sexual an ambitious play to put on, in terms of moments which touched on friendship. and picked up predator Minister Hempf, language there is lots of candid talk of identity. and trust proved this brave, Under pressure to get results from his sex. and as three of the characters are sexy. and funny production to be intense investigator Wiesler Ls facing a supposed to be in their twenties it ran the but not in any draining way. Closer is the Best dilemma, as his interest in the couple he risk of being a bit uneorrthertable. about the meaning of closeness. what is viewing gets more and more watching students acting as young right we have to know what's in the Foreign pronounced. However, his change is not professionals in such a naturalistic style_ other person's head and what right we entirely dear - as he allows Dreyman to But good acting shouldn't make that risk have to protect what's in our own heads. Language Film gel away with a plan he mutters. "Just a problem and thankfully it didn't. as I think the play's-answer is that we have this once": he is unconvinced which being the prude that I am. I was ready to to protect our own thoughts. You can't Oscar this course of action is right_ Due to the cringe at discussions of sexual positions. always know what your boyfriend or suicide of one of Dreyman's 'black- The cast were impressive. especially girlfriend is thinking and that's the way it year. The Lives listed' friends. he becomes more inclined Paul Bloomfield. who made everyone should he, because when you love to challenge the system. and Wiesler's someone you can't completely soak of Others choices become more important. Where them up. You still have to retain some the film really succeeds is in allowing the degree of detachment. Or maybe Patrick certainly lead characters' decisions to effect each 6 6 Marber Just got really badly dumped and other, while they remain separated from wanted to write about it. Either way. the deserves the each other. The system of social control Closer certainly got under production proved that love can scar as that this film is based around is much as it heals. Closer certainly got accolades it occasionally made overly obvious - most of the audience's skins, under most of the audience's skins, especially in the casting - but The bevy however thick. and for some it might has received. of Others certainly deserves the but this was a first-class have been too close for comfort. but this accolades it has received. was a first-class production . (8/10) production. 77 5 (8/10) By Simon Gillett 5 By Katy Palmer

Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 31 The Painted Veil The Tempest

Starring:Naomi Watts. Edward Norton. Liev Schreibe and Toby Jones and Diana Rigg At the West Yorkshire Playhouse Director: John Curran B.) William Shakespeare Certificate: 12.4 Director: Barrie Roller Running Time: 125 minutes

The man behind The Bard. Barrie Rutter.

cute one of Shakespeare '., fantastical plays in which the Baudience encounters an array of 6 6 kings, dukes. magicians. spirits. monsters and ronuaice all in the space of a few hours. The Tempcse has a lot to The Tempest oiler theatre goers, The West rorkchire Playhtm.ye performance of the 7'empcm has a lot to was no exception to the rule with the ennitions of revenge. love and offer theatre torgiveness proalent throughout the performance of the play. goers. The The company's interpretation of the plot is a relanNely standard one West Yorkshire but it is their perforimineo which really c‘emplifies the play as an enjoyable Playhouse night out to the theatre. Limiting themselves to a - very basic stage of just a ship's mast; rise company had a rather performance ow A difficult task of making the audience Dr6 s if a woman ever loved a man for brilliance behind an indefinable coldness. Butler for good measure. Watts has the bet to-Ls in the island setting that most of was no his virtue;' states Kitty Fane. and Alternating between 1(.120s best lines of the script. reeling off first the play rolls out upon. Thus, in effect whoever enjoyed a film for the London. Shanghai and rural China. at the • Ai+ . class W. Somerset Maughtim one-liners it was the way the characters interacted exception to same reason? This is a truly virtuous film, centre of the film is an unhappily married (the film is an adaptation of his novel) with each other and their respect for ft is beautifully shot in the very beautiful couple. Having discovered his wife's with wit and confidence. the rule. location of rural China. It is beautifully infidelity with the rather dashing Liev As with most good characters. this imaginary setting that led for the Walter and Kitty are flawed individuals audience to he encapsulated by the with as many faults as virtues. Their love mysterious island that each of the story is well balanced with the twin characters finds themselves inhabiting. 77 ii threats of cholera and the Chinese civil The island. as it were seems to in fact into the seating area as an interpretation become a character in itself, as it is the war, and yet there is hollowness to it. The of the stage directions. In contrast to island along with Prospero's stars seem to he concerned with being the comedic elements of the duo. the This had all the makings of a stars, and, while both performances are manipulation of it that forwards the play also was led on the themes of excellent, there is something absent in plot, all from the same stage. The revenge and forgiveness personified great film, but failed to go the their onscreen chemistry. performance uses music as the island's namely through Prospem. This had all the makings of a was of communicating to the other One change that was extra mile. great film. but failed to go the extra mile. actors, music which is consequently apparent in The final scene is totally pointless, and performed on a spectrum of this company's performance of the play was the there is the sense that the film just doesn't instruments by members of the talented character of Arid. a spirit. who was 5 5 know how to end. It is devoid of the company of actors and actresses emotional punch that such a story played by three people to show a more , themselves. It is this sometimes II' Shreiber. bacteriologist Walter Fane deserves, and explains too much too late. ethereal performance by the same Aar ri acted by the beautiful Naomi Watts and haunting music, which notifies the {Norton) whisks his wife Kitty (Watts) the pitch-perfect Edward Norton. It is Saying this. it's a more than pleasant audience of spells at work, scene character, allowing it to be in more off into the middle of a cholera epidemic couple of hours and, with April showers beautifully written (despite its rather changes and the arrival of other than one place at once. This was 0* predictable plot), its score is beautifully for the sake of "research". Once there, he nearly upon us, will make for good rainy characters onto the stage_ The matched with the actresses' costumes itht "t haunting, and its historical references are throws himself into helping at the town's Sunday afternoon viewing. in the floating colours they wore, company's use of music in the ;ht0 beautifully accurate. Yet. considering its hospital, leaving Kitty to fidget at borne. 16/10) allowing the audience to believe in the performance has to be respected in that ialltS- highly dramatic subject matter and Norton pulls off Walter with a mixture of nature of the character. Costumes for although Shakespeare plays often have u dr r . potential, The Painted Veil is just that: a Hugh Grant in Four Weddings and Hugh the play were basic but quite effective arc a visually stunning film that hides its Laurie in House, with a dash of Rheu By Lam Choksey a ditty of two in them, to use this to the effect it has been employed in the in showing a particular Stuartesque era 1 62)J that the play was set in, with Callban's performance is of a great benefit to the play. costumes trying to show his half man/ 1- 0 half monster personification (further 54:111 With the interlinking of three apparently separate plots the company aided by the stature that the actor News Reel: utilizes this very efficiently allowing maintained throughout the play). them to show skills of acting in Overall, the play was enjoyable whose effect was aided melodramatic and comedic situations. The sequel to Ang Lee's Hulk, The to go see the ode to '70's exploitation. Grant was arrested after an alleged Comedy is especially characterized by especially by the use of music to Incredible Hulk, suddenly just got but many of the few who did go, didn't attack on photographer in London. personify the island itself; the mix of Trinculo and Stephano whose Classy. Edward Norton, star of The exactly get the idea of a double-bill and Grant's offending weapon was a tub of comedic and melodramatic elements performances had the audience Painted Veil, has been cast as Bruce left alter the first film... The studio have baked beans.... chuckling with laughter. The duo's use provide the audience with light relief Runner and his mean green atter- decided to slice the double-bill in two but not at the expense of the message of the audience in their performance cgo-Grindhause, and re-release Tarantino's Death Proof of the performance. the double-hill from also added to their advantage engaging and Rodriguez's Planet Terror 18110) Quentin Tarantino and Robert the audience acting the 'clown' in front separately, expect the same thing to be Ruariguez, has bombed in the States. of them and even at one point coming Notonly- were cinema-goers reluctant done over here too...And finally, Hugh By Anthony Coward 32 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 EE E E EE E E EE E E there's no iimit.

"All hail Zuckerberg, creater of the unfree world!"

)(11 Facebook, Fa eboo Facebook 0nee again. it seems change is on with your parents that well, don't of stealing the source code of said point for groups. events and amazing messages and the like are no longer afoot. Odour Eaters, thinks tell them. Paying off your credit cards creation whilst doing work experience facts such as Leeds University's organised in a ladder effect on the Epage? It seems change is all can never cover the fact that they at *connectU', a rival friend favourite film (Anchorman), or that left. now dropping from the top of the the rage in the twenty first century. be don't love you anymore. Epage sobs; networking site. Epage gasps and all the top 10 bands are completely screen like gifts from heaven. Virgin it skin deep or. in the case of the more its parent was a USB pen drive and crashes. With 65% of its 18.000.000 male. Browse other networks to pregnancies, exclaims Epage. exotic members of modelling world. particularly scathing. Was 'US-B' members logging in daily and more discover the weird fascination Asian Further than this. it really is still deep skin. Deep throat? gags Epage. Lincoln's plan for a communist than often perusing one of the countries have with American business as usual at Facebook HQ, Microsoft on Macs. Parkinson on Utopia? Epage doubly wonders 1,000.000,000 hosted photos, the detective dramas or that the Fiji slowly but surely becoming the centre ITV, the obsessive behaviour of an doubly and now considers something redesign of Facehook's user interface network has fewer than 200 members. of the spacetime continuum. Centre of unreceptive ex-boyfriend Imo°, low, more to the point. was predictably overdue. fewer than Epage has real friends. a continuum? ponders Epage. whispers Epage I and now Facebook. So, why has el facebooko gone And re-vamp they 'kind of have. Epage gasps: a little bit comes out and However. with more members in the Holiest of all the friendly networkingy through its biggest change since taking a leaf out of old Micro then goes back in. local Leeds network than the websiteys has gone under the digital dropping the 'the' from its domain Gatesy's book in the art of moving Further from this, Murky has University's now. Epage predicts knife for an injection of cyberspace. name in 2005 or the controversial buttons at least an inch in any removed the little Facebook man gang warfare and rioting in Digenetics? questions Epage. When creation of 'feeds' in 2006? Hmmm, direction. thawwww), remembered for a short Millennium Square. Watch out, such a diversion comes your way, it's well, it's not as if this is still Perhaps the most appealing change period by a gift exclaiming "R.I.P. Sheffield: we're downloading your hest to face it head on. Epage, thinks backroom operation of Harvard gimp to the average Facebook stalker is the Facebook man". Epage suggests a souls as we speak. Epage. Note to self: If you don't get Mark Zuckerburg. regularly accused new network homepages. A centre murder investigation. Shortcuts to Tim Sevenths

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"A book must be an ice-axe to break the seas frozen inside ow- soul." Young lovers left stranded -Franz Kafica Fiction News On Chesil Beach sections far less impressiv•. While there abandon completely a girl he had loved • Cormac McCarthy published until July. Ian MeEwan are several moments of enlightening and married. Of course the scenes are still (pictured) has won this Replacing it is J.R.R. I 76pp. Jonathan Cape. insight into the characters' fears and well depicted: it is the situation and not the year's Pulitzer prize for Tolkien's The Children of f12.99 motivations, especially in the way they are writing which is unconvincing. But given his tenth hook. The Harin, completed from a communicated to and misunderstood by that this is the critical point of the book, -I Road. u dark tale of a collection of unfinished Ian MeEwan is each other via their physical actions, many found it hugely disappointing. post-apocalyptic notes by his sun without doubt one of the of their thoughts and impulses are very Indeed in the few remaining pages that America. The $ 10,000 Christopher. The story is for most writers in difficult to understand or empathise with, follow. this flaw is compounded as award is given for "distinguished also set in Middlearth. and features Britain and indeed the The idea that underpins the entire book McEwan follosys the two characters into fiction by an American author". illustrations by Alan Lee. world today, and any new book of his is is the notion of how one single. critical their futures: not only does Edward seem Lawrence Wright recieved the guaranteed to attract considerable moment can completely change a life. barely affected by this failed relationship Pulitzer prize for non-fiction. and Ii, • Pope Benedict attention. Much like his American with the main instance of such a moment and marriage but the following forty years Natasha Trctheway won the poetry XVI (pictured) has counterpart Philip Roth's most recent occurring on Chesil Beach, where, after of their lives are covered in barely a award. published his first hook effort Everyman. for his latest book their attempt at sex had gone as couple of pages, and even McEwan's • The National Short Story Prize has since becoming Pope. McEwan has chosen the short novel form, disastrously as would be expected talent for compression cannot make this heen awarded to Julian Gough, for Jesus of Nazareth sold with On Chesil Beach attempting to (especially since Edward had made the seem at all realistic. Obviously he's trying The Orphan and the Mob. Gough 50,000 copies On its encapsulate the rise and tall of a schoolboy error of abstaining from 'self- to demonstrate how fundamentally and describes the story as "like the bit at first day of publication. relationship in a mere 16() pages. pleasuring' for the previous week). irrevocably the situation has been changed the start of the Star Wars and contains Benedict's reflections The story is centred around the Florence makes one last attempt to save from the well-paced development of their trilogy...Except set in Tipperary-. upon the teachings of Christ, as well wedding night of a young couple, both their relationship, and when this is relationship. but given that the critical The prize was created to reinvigorate as his views on politics. The title is to longer virgins. set in 1962 when "a conversation vehemently rejected she walks off along turning point was not believable. this short story writing in Britain. and the be printed in 20 languages in its first tla about sexual difficulties was plainly the beach and out of Edward's life forever. section is even less so. with the added fact first prize is I.15,000 with smaller print run. ap olds impossible". However, sexual difficulties with he making no effort to call after her. that the writing lases its finely poised cash awards for the runner up. David • Dicken's World has opened its Viga they have. For the male character, While this is certainly an interesting idea. descriptive quality. Almond. and also for the remaining doors to the public for the first time Edward, this is just run-of-the-mill and one well worth exploring, I found it A writer of McEwan's immense talent shortlisted authors. this week. The £62million attraction. wholly unconvincing with respect to this is always difficult to criticise. especially near Chatham in Kent, is an indoor is still nervousness and inexperience, but for his situation. Despite the fact that the when the book contains such finely • Harry Potter and the Deathly theme park bused upon the life and k HQ, new wife Florence it is something much stronger, a sickening dread of physical characters' psychologies and motivations crafted character development and Hallows has finally been knocked works of Charles Dickens, featuring die cents intimacy possibly stemming from a subtly had been so well-crafted in the backstory description. However for the central from the top spot in the bestseller reproduction slums. costumed Cenral hinted at incident in her childhood. sections, here, and indeed in all the element of his story to be so disappointing charts, which it has occupied for the prostitutes and a sewer based boat Unable to communicate how they feel to 'present time' sections. they don't act at is surely a significant past 16 weeks, despite not being ride. a inns each other, their fears and expectations all convincingly. While I could mount up unchecked, and the wedding understand and empathise with Florence's (6/ 1(1) dkis night progresses with a sense of actions, I could not believe that one failed impending inevitable disaster. sexual encounter would lead Edward to By Christopher Tedd Fiction Interspersed throughout the unfolding I.ondunstani his values change. as he has essentially 1)gur scene in the bedroom of their hotel are Gautam Malkant embraces] his new lifestyle whole- chapters of historical backstory, giving a 384pp. heartedly from the outset, but more that it serene concise but enlightening overview of the HarperPerennial. £7.99 is much easier to sympathise with him as characters' respective childhoods, and the underdog, rather than as what he how they met and fell in love with each Cutting-edge and considers a success_ This transformation other. McEwan handles these shills of therefore forever dated attempts to delicately reveal the sad perspective and time with the consummate through its language. underbelly of the high-rolling lifestyle -as ease you would expect from such a master Londonstant could be Jas becomes embroiled in die world he so of his craft. and the individual psychology dubbed A Clockwork • eagerly admired from afar. stakes become and circumstances of each character is Orange-died White Teeth. However. this higher and questions of family, friends, fleshed out completely via just a few is no made-up language - it's the speech race. and religion are elevated to grounds brilliantly captured set-pieces from their of the 'Desi' youth on the streets of for violence. By the end, his self- lives. Many have praised McEwan's London. Malkani offers the reader a free destructive and self-obsessed wily of descriptive and compressive talent with pass into this linguistic and cultural world thinking makes it hard to keep reading. as relation to this book, and it is in these designed to exclude. Narrated by the it is generously peppered with elaborate sections. comprising no more than half the protagonist. Jas. it is all written in slang scatological metaphors that have worn length of the book yet yielding two verging on textspeak ("U goes 2 da same particularly thin. In this respect. I really complete. subtle characters. where this German n Science loons as me, but u sit felt that Malkami could have delved into a skill really shines through. up form aid all dent spods. innit?-i larger bag of comparisons or developed However I found the 'present time' which can be. at times, trying. There's not another way of expressing these repeated really any point in substituting the digits 2 ideas without losing any of the book's or 4 for their homophonic woods when tea credibility and making it less unpleasant to Fiction only employed in the dialogue, nor does it read. seem necessity to spell 'phones"fones'. Another feature perhaps indicative of The Lost City The story of The Last City is straight say an awful lot), a girl by the name of etc.. this book's status as Miami's first (or Henry Shukman I I forward enough. The protagonist, one Sarah (obvious love interest alert) and a Ostensibly the most notable feature of simply of poor editing) was the use of 352pp. Abacus. f. I 0.99 Jackson Small (terrible name. I know) has large selection of eccentrics. this book is its documentation of the life repetition of certain descriptive phrases - been recently invalided out of the army. As I have already mentioned. I'm not of second-generation immigrants. No often word-for word between distant When i picked up following a catastrophic accident in wholly certain if I enjoyed The Lost City longer confronted with their parents' sections of the book. It' used effectively. Henry Shiikman's The which he was wounded, and his friend. or not. Perhaps it was in part because the pressures of fitting in and achieving this might have served as a way of LOSr City for the first time. Connolly (also a soldier) is killed_ book is trying to transcend so many .access. the heroes of this novel re-define connecting the reader to the story and alarm bells began ringing Understandably enough perhaps. Jackson genres in only a few hundred pages tone their goals. their language. and their linking it all together, but once again, it in my mind upon reading is overcome by grief. and finds it hard minute it's a love story, then it's a thriller. culmre. One moment extolling modest felt morn like a lack of ability to devise the quote printed on it - "A sery gifted trying to settle back into any kind of then there's some politics thrown hill. Iasi' women and the next moment new ways of describing the same thing and haunting new writer. First of all. normal life. Jackson's next step is just Perhaps it's the occasionally irritatingly ogling girls on the street, the boys are and an insult to the reader that the only I'm never entirely certain what quotes what any of us would do in such a accurate descriptions of Peru (Shukman trapped between two worlds and rejecting way to drill a certain concept into their like that mean, and secondly. if they are situation - go on a mad and fairly has, in the past. done some travelling of both - mainstream UK culture and its heads was by using identical phrasing. intended as praise for the work, they are dangerous quest into deepest darkest Peru his own). Perhaps its because he is also a values and also their parents' At the end. Malkami executes almost always blatant lies, little more than to find the eponyrnous lost city. When I poet and sometimes his prose suffers a unquestioningly traditional ways. dramatic twist skilfully. if obtusely . verbal vomit spewed by some famous was a small child, I wanted to do that too little front excessive attempts to be However, I. was most specifically engaged throwing the story into a completely author (in this case, Vikram Seth) across - but in search of Paddington Bear's linguistically pleasing. Most of all. by the development of the main character. different light. Completely unexpected_ it what would otherwise be a perfectly family. rather than some ruins. Anyway. however. I think it was because Shukman Jas. almost doubles the value of the novel, acceptable cover. The mere presence Of before he can get on with his adventures refuses to use quotation marks of any Hearing Jas's inner dialogue is slightly giving the reader two stories to take away, such a quote, clearly just put there at the and voyage of self-discovery. Jackson is kind to show speech. which I found painful throughout the book. as he possibly even making a re-read a behest of some over-zealous publisher. robbed of most of his equipment, his irritating from beginning to end. struggles within himself with his necessity. Overall. Londonarani is immediately makes me wary of the text to passport and his cash. Somehow because Regardless of my boundless capacity to conscious conversion from a 'poncey certainly a very interesting book to read, follow. Often my disdain is proven to be of this, he is sucked into other crazed be pedantic. The Last City is no mat coconut' to a 'safe Desi'. rejecting his old but in literary terms, is hopefully not. misdirected, and the novels adorned with adventures - i.e. an undercover, black-cps work of' fiction, but it's an entertaining ways and reinforcing his new life and its going to be the pinnacle of Malkami's such rubbish can be excellent reads style escapade into an area under the enough diversion from writing essays. creed. He shows some signs of resistance fledgling but promising career. leaving me feeling thoroughly guilty that control of a very powerful drug cartel - to crudity, making the reader sympathise I ever doubted the author's talents. With and meets many interesting souls along ( 51 I 01 with this good boy in bad boy 'gams'. but (610 Henry Shukman, I'm not entirely sure the way, such as a small boy who sticks to he certainly lost my sympathy as the novel progressed. Perhaps it is not so much that By Thea Whitman whether he redeemed himself or not. him in the manner of a limpet (but doesn't By Katie Dunn 34 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 n Who's got a bum head? You've Gest it!

avid Gest is what I imagine Vaginn a Seaman to clean his teeth_ On exiling the jungle Gest has Satan to took like. In fact. if However to give him credit he wasted no time wangling his way into Dyou put the two side by side I performed incredibly well in various other programmes. He doubt even a devil-n-meter could Bushtucker Trial where he had to currently features as a judge on distinguish them. Now I'm not retrieve stars from a tank filled with Grease is the Word, the newest breed usually one to judge a hook by its other hideous beings such as of reality TV, which auditions cover but in this case the blurb is crocodiles and eels. The creatures hopeful nest-end performers. Even written clearly across his curdled look such a shine to him that Ant had more impressi e is whatever he did face: "I am evil-'. The name Gest has to politely draw David's attention to to land himself his own fly on the lately been excreted across our wall documentary 'This is David television screens far too freely. The 11 Gest'. which began last week. He has purpose of this writing is to discover promised an appearance from his the source of this aerially transmitted Apparently his good friend Michael Jackson at some diarrhoea, in other words: why is this point in the series but I'll personally man famous? friend runs an be watching it to ridicule his A quick search on the Internet unfailing arrogance and stupidity. Movie Database reveals he was the albino hotel; he Like most idiots he has a proud sense producer of various television of his own masculinity claiming, programmes and music concerts, but supports a charity "I've never felt the need to prove my nothing worth a mention. It seems called Chinese sexuality. What am I supposed to do, Gest's original fame was procured by go around telling everyone I'm his intimate friendship with Michael Girls With Herpes; straight?" and later adding. "I am Jackson and disastrous marriage to straight." He happens to have Liza Minnelli. which ended with and he hires a released an autobiography this month them both trying to sue each other. as well. entitled 'Simply the Gest'. ~His recent return to the limelight was maid called The implications of the pun are a tad provided by I'm a Celebrity Get Me Vaginica Seaman presumptuous and I'm sure you and I Out of Here, the reality show where can think of quite a few million desperate has-beens endure jungle- to clean his teeth things better than Gest, but I themed torture in order to reacquire wouldn't bother trying to argue with the affections of the public. Whilst him: if being voted fifth biggest Gest failed to win the show he Loser of 2002 by People Weekly seemed to win the hearts of many an enormous spider that had snuggled wasn't enough to make hint bow out viewers with his "wacky" sense of up on top of his large balding head. of the limelight gracefully, nothing humour. He also laid claim to one or How did he get to be so friendly with two outlandish statements around the rodents and insects. you might campfire: apparently his friend runs teasingly ask! Gest blames his an Albino Hotel: he supports a fearless attitude on the fact that as a charity called Chinese Girls With child he was abused by his father. Herpes; and he hires a maid called Ah, right. By Clare Pidsley Blast from the past! Who Deserves The Tardis Time again to take a nostalgic look back at memorable Ticket? shows from a bygone era. This week... Dawson's Creek! Rose Tyler

uberty is one wild and personally never really felt this way. I girl,. probably had something to do Like many viewers I was a bit It was easy to see who the clever unforgettable ride. Things start have always got on well with my wail them. dubious about Billie Piper being a one was, as Rose's lack of' p to grow, emotions become parents and certainly did not need Il I remember correctly, Joey would good Dr. Who assistant. what with intelligence gave the Doctor ample uncontrollable, erections occur for James Van Der Beek to speak for me. climb up to Dawson's room every her less than fantastic pop career and opportunity to save the day and look little or no reason. You grow paranoid Yes, occasionally it was merely night and sit with him watching bad choice in men. But Rose Tyler even more manly and attractive. about why your parents look at you enough for a strong gust of wind it) Spielberg films, and he would do really stole my heart. she brought a Clearly Christoper Ecciestone left that way. and you Fall in love with occur to set an erection in motion. but nothing but sit there and cry. Sweet, chav element to the role, a character because he felt upstaged. With two anyone who has a nice smell, a good that's puberty. However, let me just you might think and yeah I suppose it that an increasing amount of Britons 'Doctors' in the new series. that's rep and tells you you've got great get down to the brass tax of things. was if they were just friends. but can relate to. She is the ideal Dr Who just confusing. Seeing Rose Tyler eyes. II can he confusing to say the James Van Der Beek, aka Dawson Dawson loved her and who did she side-kick with her blonde hair and bumble along each week was much least. Thank goodness therefore we Leery, is an absolute faggot. No matter end up sleeping with? Pacey. This kid clean sparkling teeth, Her cockney more entertaining than watching a had Dawson's Creek to properly what crazy emotions I felt as a youth. I had sex with his teacher at the age of accent was like music to my ears and battle of the egos. articulate all of the feelings our always knew I had testicles and knew about 15t So while Dawson was the only thing that would have made Rose Tyler, the country mourns patents siMpla did rr I understand.. I that my seeming 'love' for certain masturbating/crying over Joey, Pacey it better would have been if she'd and proper die hard Doctor Who fans is fulfilling the adolescent dream of actually sang. She would have easily will miss your screen presence and most males: who do you think is going beaten the Wicks if she dressed up in tracksuit bottoms. Just a tip though to \\ in in that situation? I suppose a school uniform and sang 'Cos I Billie. stay away from period dramas. that's why the show was so successful Want To' in squeaky prepubescent actually, no one liked Dawson, falsetto, By Harriet Knowles everyone liked Pacey. Essentially it was just a comedy, we get to watch Dawson go through emotional angst and hell over Joey and then his cool. calm. better looking friend. shags her. Martha Jones 'I'm sitting next to my best friend in the world and my palms are Martha Jones is a much better match Martha Jones is the one you would sweating...' Shut the fuck up eye for the Doctor. After all she is bring back to meet your parents. And. brows and grow a pair! planning to become a doctor herself. to illustrate the point. rumour has it If I'm honest. I loved the show. The She's smarter than Rose. less blonde the Doctor may marry? drama, the emotion, the unbelievable and looks less like a pig. She may not Billie Piper is t\to musty stupid as vocabularies, Dawson's bad luck and have the bouncing bosom that makes only a fool would lea e the sexual angst. it was- all there. And let's he up Billie Piper's thespian expertise animal magnetism of Da\ id Tennant, honest, during our adolescent years we but a little more quality and little a legend and all round sex god. On all felt a little 'Dawson's Creeky' less lhs for your money wouldn't he a second thoughts. I hate them both - emotionally. and there's nothing had thing. Rose Tyler is the typical want to be the assistant! But really, wrong with that, it's part of the Doctor Who number two but Martha the sooner the Doctor forgets about richness of life, I just don't 'feel' for Jones is the modern. fresh assistant of Rose and appreciates Martha Jones' Dawson Leery and his giant head. the twenty-first century. Think of it superioni.. the better. this way, Rose Tyler was the girl you By Andrew Edelston would have the kinky affair with but By Maddy McGartie (17 Leeds Student www.ieedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 35

In tonight's episode. Jeremy tries to looks of Mark and Jeremy . If you get hack with his ex wife and Mark haven't seen it before, think the joins the gym in a feeble attempt to embarrassing humour or RiA, Get- Friday avoid his fiance. Frankly, Peep Show vais but less nminstrearn. is weird, Funny, but weird. Expect April cringe-worthy distorted close ups of 27th kissing and the less than Brad Pitt Harriet Knowles

ONE TWO itv five club 6.00 Breakfast 9.15 Missing. 6.00 CBeebies: Firribles, 6.20 The 6.05 Making R. 6.10 The Harts. 6.00 The Save•Urns! 6.10 Fifi arid Atrium 6.00 GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle SALSOUL 10.00 Homes under the Hammer. Story Makers 6.35 Balamory 7.00 Show. 10.30 This Morning. 12.30 6.35. The Hoobs 7.00 Fleshly the Flowertots. 6.25 Nanny's Feet reggae:ion, salsa 11.00 To Buy or Not to Buy CHIC. Arthur 7.15 ChuckleVision. Loose Women. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime Squeezed. 7.30 Everybody Loves 6.35 Bird Bath. 6.45 Funky Town. 11.30 Car Booty 12.15 Bargain 7.30 Get 100_ 8.00 The Underdog News; Weather. 2.00 Midsomer Raymond. 8.00 lust Shoat Me. 6,50 The Milkshake! Show. 7.20 Baja Beach Club Hunt. 1.00 BBC News; Weather. Show on CBBC. 8.30 CBeehres. Murders. 4.00 Daily Cooks. 5.00 8.25 lust Shoot Me. 8.55 Frasier. Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends. FEEL GOOD FRIDAY NIGHTS 1.30 Regional News and Weather. Tommy zoom. 8.40 Nurnberiacks The Royal. 9.20 Frasier 9.50 Will and Grace. 7.30 Little Princess. 7.45 Make Radio Ake DJs 1.40 Neighbours. 2.05 Doctors. 9.00 Nina and the Neurons. 9.15 6.00 Calendar. 10.15 Without a Trace. 11.05 Way for Noddy. 8.00 Say it wrth 2.35 Diagnosis Murder. 3.20 BBC Lunar Jim, 9.25 Me Tool 9.45 6.25 Party Election Without a Trace. 12.00 News at Noddy. 8.05 Fifi and the Cockpit News: Weather, Regional News Mama Mirahelle*s Home Movies Broadcast by the Noon. 12.30 Room for Flowertots. 8.20 Peppa Pig. 8.25 THE SESSION 3.25 MC: Lazytown. 3.50 The 10.00 Postman Pat. 10.15 The Liberal Democrats. Improvement. 1.00 Channel 4 Thomas 8, Friends. 8.40 Old Pe.- iridie, electro 8. guitars Likeaballs. 4.00 Totally Doctor Roly Mo Show. 10.30 The Maths 6.30 ITV Evening News; Racing front Sandmen Park 2.30 Stories, 8.50 Mio Mao. 9.00 The Coco Who. 4.30 Extreme Animals. 5.00 Channel. 10.40 The Maths Weather. Life Begins Again. 3.30 Wright Stuff 10.30 Trisha @UTOMATIC The Underdog Show on CBBC. Channel. 10,50 Watch. 11.05 7.00 Emmerdale. Rosemary Countdown. 4.15 Deal or No Deal. Goddard_ 11.30 five news 12.00 the Kinks to the Kooks 5.25 Newsiorincl 5.35 Tales of Europe. 11.20 Focus. blackmails Han. Val and 5.00 The New Paul O'Grady Show. Home and Away. 12,30 Neighbours. 11.40 Primary History: Saxons and 6.00 The Simpson. HouseBusters. 1.00 HouseBusters. Faversham Sharon reach an uneasy NEW BOHEMIA 6.00 BBC News and Vikings. 12.00 The Daily Politics. truce. The oldies opt for a 6.30 Hollyoaks. Will watches 1.30 Russell Grant's Postcards. funk, soul, hip hop Weather. 12.30 Working Lunch. 1.30 World futuristic pageant float. as the students find the 1.35 FILM: Seasons of are Heart 630 Look North; Weather. Championship Snooker, 5.55 Party Laurel receives a call. comatose Zoe, then (19941. Drama, starring Carol Halo 7.00 A Question of Sport. Election Broadcast by the Liberal 7.30 Coronation Street. pretends to be shocked Burnett and George Segal. 3.35 THAT BUNG THING 7.30 Rogue Traders. Democrats. Carla's anger stirs up when he walks in five news update. 3.40 FILM: r&b. hip hop, electro 8.00 EastEnders. Denise is left 6.00 Eggheads. trouble among the 7.00 Channel 4 News. Danielle Steel's No Greater Love HIF• Club reeling by Shirley's 6.30 Great British Menu. Connors. Blanche realises 735 Unreported World. (19951 Drama. Starling Kelly FUNKSOULNATION admission. Phil proposes to Northern Ireland champion she has returned 10 an 8.00 A Place in the Sun: Rutherford and Chris Sarandon. classic 70's soul, funk Richard Corrigan and rival Home or Away. 5.30 five news Stella. unhappy home. Messy Jack Melropohtan Uni Noel McMeel will now cook 9.00 Ugly Betty. Dame is put 6.00 Home and Away. 8.30 My Family. causes Vera a tumble on STAR 4' ELECTRIC HEAD 9.00 Have I Got News for their entire menus for the the stairs. in an awkward situation 6.30 Two and a Hall Men. metal, rock & indie You. Comedy quiz show panel, who will then name 8.00 Death of the British with a girl lie once stood 7.00 five news. that grills contestants an the chef going through to Seaside? Tonight. up at college, who is now 7,30 Mean Machines. This Nu the week's news, host Fern the national final. Michael Nicholson New York's most powerful edition investigates the POUSH NIGHT Britton and panellists 7.00 World Championship investigates the errors that lawyer. world of logging, with a Rios Reginald D Hunter and Snooker. have plunged some 10.00 Derren Brown: Trick or look at a remote controlled THE SUPPER CLUB Mare Boulton, 7.30 Christine's Garden. northern seaside towns Treat. Derren teaches a logger and a tree-chopping incite. alternative 9.30 Ruddy Hell! Its Harry Series about one woman's into terminal decline, and pensioner how to play submarine, and Paul. Harry Enfield passion for gardening. poker and becomes a living 8.00 Super Cats. The Subculture looks at how same resorts HOSPITAL RADIO WWI Paul Whitehouse star Christine heads for a have bucked the downward waxwork in Madame 9.00 NOS. Investigating agents emo, rock, electro party in a sketch show. aimed by farmers' market in Bolton trend. Tussauds. uncovers shocking evidence Morwenna Banks and for local produce in 8.30 Midsomer Murders, 10.30 Peep Show, when an ambulance University. Stylus Laura Salon. Featuring a preparation for a Lancashire Barnaby and Scott delve 11.05 Peter Kay's Phoenix transporting a dead marine FRUITY pop. cheese & party host of new characters evening to be held back at into the murder of a visitor Nights. Will Brian explodes including Kenny LeYton the home. to PlitITIMOT45 Relish manage to keep the 10.00 Law and Order: Wire hopeless boxer. 8.00 Gardeners' World. 9.00 factory, and discover a web Phoenix Club open Inn the Criminal Intent. Crime MOMENTUM 10.00 BBC News; Regional Timewatch. of secrets and lies within sell-out performance of drama series. Detectives d'ri'b News: Weather. 9.50 Deer in the City. Short the Plummer family. psychic Clinton Baptiste? Gorem and Fames become gigs 10.35 Friday Night with documentary about a pair 10.30 ITV News; Weather. 11.40 4 Music: Transmission curious about an altruistic BrucJenell Social Club Jonathan Ross. Guests of roe deer who have made 11.00 WAGs Boutique: The With T-Mobile. Steve Good Samaritan who gives NAPOLEON 111RD include Hollywood stars a Scottish cemetery their Final Score. The girls race Jones and Lauren Laverne away his organs and money Tobey Maguire and Kirsten home_ These normally shy to make the final sale, are in Swansea when they to the needy. (=cockpit IC SOFT PARADE Dunst. Music comes from (matures are a magical knowing that the victors are joined by Mika. Mask 11.00 Raised by the Hand of ELECTR Jamie 1 addition to a city's urban will be walking away with Street Preachers and God: Hidden Lives. Fox & Newt 11.35 FILM: Timecop 11990 population. profits from both Switches. Documentary serie ADAM BOMB 1, of Futuristic thnlfer in which a 10.00 QI. boutiques. Presented by 12.45 4Mlisit: Red Bull Musk exploring unusual lives . ariple cop must find a corrupt 10.30 Newsnight. June Sarpang. Academy: Melbourne. 1.15 4 This edition looks at three Josephs Well THE VANGOS leak senator who has acquired 11.00 Newsnight Review. 12.30 ITV Play: Make Your Play. Music: The JD Set Presents: Cold families whose ideas on the 11.35 World Championship arte. the power to change the 4.10 60 Minute Makeover. 5.00 War Kids 1.30 GoalissimoI 2.25 upbringing and disciplining Rios course of history, starring Snooker. Gumball 3000. 2.55 KOTV 3.20 of their children are directly z. left ITV terghtscreen. 5.30 11V Early .TER PUSSxYCAT' lean-Claude Van Demme 12.25 World Championship Morning News. Supporting Acts. 3.30 Trans World informed by the Bible. ar rata; 08709 913913 ir two and Ron Silver. Snooker - Extra. 2.25 Star Sport. 4.25 Adrenal in Rush. 4.55 12.00 Prison Break. 1.00 Quiz '1;1'1 1,15 Joins BBC News 24. Trek. 3.15 Star Trek. 4.05 Supporting Acts, 5.00 Countdown. Call. 5.35 Wildlife SOS. Tyler Malcolm in the Middle. 5.45 New Shoots: Films from reach 4.30 Close Disabled Directors. tag 3

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DB @I on club TWO item Bondi Beach Club ONE 11 4 five BOOGIE NIGHTS 6.00 Breakfast. 10.00 Saturday 6.00 CBeebies: Teletubbles. 6.30 6.00 GMTV. 9.25 CITV: Horrid 6.10 The Hoobs. 6.35 The Hoobs. Mist; Sheepdog Tales. 7.35 Little from the makers of Kitchen. 11.30 Great British Menu. Balamory. 6.50 Step Inside. 7.00 Goalissimol 8.00 The Princess. 7.45 Make Way for 'Love Train' Henry. 9.40 OW Grizzly Tales For 7.00 12.00 BBC News. 12.10 Football CBBC: Batfink. 7.10 Arthur. 7.35 Gruesome Kids. 9.50 CITV: Tricky Morning Line. 8.55 14: Nothing Noddy. 7.55 Say It with Noddy. Creation Focus. 1.00 World Championship The Underdog Show on CBBC. Quickies 9.55 CITV: Art Attack, But... Natasha Bedingfield. 9.25 8.00 Harry and His Bucket Full of UVE AT CREATION Snooker, 4.30 Final Score. 5.15 8.00 Watch My Chops. 8.15 Mona 10.20 CITV: The Amazing 14: Muarcool. 10.30 T4: Popworld. Dinosaurs. 8.15 Harry and His chart & party BBC News; Regional News; the Vampire. 8.35 The Story of Adrenalini Brothers, 10.25 CITY: 11.20 T4: Friends. 11.50 Natasha Bucket Full of Dinosaurs. 8.30 The Tracy Beaker. 9.00 Hider in The 12.25 T4; Book of Pooh. 9.00 Ebb and Flo. Evolution Weather. 5.35 Just for Laughs. Tricky Quickies. 10.30 CITV: Bedingfielci: T4 Special. I LOVE S.E.X. 6.05 The National Lottery House. 10.00 The Underdog Show Jungle Run. 11.00 CITV: King Shipwrecked 2007: The Hut Cam 9.05 Peppa Pig. 9.15 Fifi and the t'n'b & hip hop People's Quiz. on CBBC. 10,30 Totally Doctor Arthur's Disasters 11,30 CITV: Diaries. 12.55 it_ Shipwrecked Flowertots. 9.30 Jane and the 6.45 Doctor Who. As a new Who, 11.00 The Story of Tracy Drake and Josh. 12.00 Saturday 2007: Battle of the Islands. 2.00 Dragon. 10.00 World's Strongest HiFt. Club Derek Empire rises in 1930s Beaker. 11.30 The Fairly Odd Cooks. 1.30 ITV News; Weather. Channel 4 Racing from Sandown Man. 11.00 Making of The World's THE BOOGALOO CLUB 12.00 FILM: funk, jazz lafin, reggae New York. the Doctor must Parents. 11.45 Sporisround. 12.00 1.35 Calendar News and Weather. Park and Ripon. 4.10 Location, Strongest Man. enter an unholy alliance. See Hear 12.35 FILM: the 1.40 American Idol. L40 Planet's Location. Location. 4.45 Deal or Whispering Smith (1948). Western. Mission 7.30 Any Dream Will Do. Magnificent Showman (1964 Funniest Animals. 3.00 FILM. No Deal Classic. 5.35 Monarchy by starring Alan Ladd and Brenda GLASSHOUSE The 10 remaining Drama, starring John Wayne and Smokey and the Bandit iI (1980). David Starkey. Marshall. 1.40 FILM: Six Black funky & hard house contestants are soon to Rita Hayworth. 250 FILM: The Comedy, starring Burt Reynolds 6.35 Channel 4 News. Horses 11962). Western, starring Mission AnneXe become nine. Riddle of the Sands (1979) and Sally Field. 455 Calendar Including sport and Audie Murphy and Dan Duryea. POPTASTIC 8.35 Casualty. Josh has to face Adventure, stamng Michael York News, Sport and Weather_ 5.10 weather. 3.10 FILM: Columba Double incfie & pop some difficult decisions and Jenny Agutter 4.30 ITV News; Sports Results; Weather. 7,00 Prince Charles: The Shock (1973). Crime, starring Peter when he returns to Ftolby Superstore 5.30 World 5.25 You've Been Framed! Bachelor Years. Falk and Martin Landau. 4.45 My Ho and finds himself in the Championship Snooker. 6.25 Vernon Kay s Programme recreating the FILM: Born to Be Wild (1995). BASICS ' with Jessee Rose, Samim centre of a terrorist alert. 8,30 Porridge. Classic comedy Gameshow Marathon. spirit of Prince Charles's Children's, starring Will Horneff Selena has something very series Fletcher is incensed Classic 70s show The bachelor years during the and Helen Shaver. Rehab important to tell Nathan. when a third celimate Golden Shot is given a 1970s, with contributions 6.35 FILM: Blind Date (1987). SPEED QUEEN 9.25 The National Lottery arrives, and to add insult to 2007 make-over, as our from some of those who Farcical comedy about a infury, he turns out to be Rios People's Quiz. The search celebrities fire crossbows to knew him at the time. beautiful woman's bizarre HEADBANGERS BALL fur the UK's best quiver. one of his old enemies win points. Will Wendy 8.00 Face of Britain. reaction to alcohol which rock Do or Die sees the winner 9.00 The Return of 'Alto Richard, Jarnelia or Andrea Archaeologist Neil Oliver spells disaster for a of the Brain Chain select 'Alto. The cast and Catherwood ho the mark ) explores the results of a businessman when he The Subculture one contestant from the characters of the classic 7.30 Grease Is the Word: landmark study into takes her to an important NIGHTCLUB OF THE UVING DEAD remaining nine for a head sitcom return with brand Live. Britain's heritage, here function, starring Bruce alt, goth & rockobilly to head. 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A Sophie Barnes, pun the booth after being told help a prisoner escape from ROCKLROU. brave rescue attempt is by the caller that he'll be a military detention camp. with DJ Debstar Hans of eight Premiership extraordinaire. matches. Manchester planned. 10.30 The Dame Edna shot dead if he hangs up, 9.25 CSI:NY. Crime drama gigs United are at Everson, 11.20 Have I Got a Bit More Treatment. Dane Edna's starring Cohn Farrell and When a rich real estate Brudenell Social Chelsea host Bolton, News for You. Paul guests include British MP Kiefer Sutherland. agent is found dead, Mac Club Sheffield United meet Merton and Ian Hislop Boris Johnson and 10.30 FILM: The Firm (1993). A and Stella work with LES GEORGES LENINGRAD Watford and West Ham entertain in the extended oicketing legend Shane newly-graduated lawyer evidence that suggests he Care travel to Wigan. version of the classic news Warne. rejects big city law was either the perpetrator BAKRSSELLLSS A 11.50 Cricket World Cup quiz. 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Rios 1.55 Sign Zone: Hairy Bikers Extra 3.50 Close humiliated on a national Prophets. 1.50 Rockfeedbeck. 2.15 11.25 Grey's Anatomy. Medical NST AUng.AUTHORITY' Ross. Pletkets ri Ride Again. 2.25 Sign Zone: talk show, starring Sandra FILM: Slam (1998). Drama, starring drama following the 08709 913913 Horizon. 3.15 Sign Zone' To Buy or Bullock and Harry Connick Saul Williams and Sonja Sohn. fortunes of first year Not to Buy. 4.00 Joins BBC News Jr. 4.00 FILM! Hav Plenty (1998). interns. Bailey instructs an 14. 5.00 Cricket World Cup 1.50 ITV Play: Make Your Play. Comedy, starring Chenoa Maxwell unenthusiastic Umbria to Highlights. 3.50 Don't Move, Improve. 4.30 and Hill Harper. 5.25 Countdown. look after her baby. Don't Move, Improve. 5.00 ITV CHANNEL 5 12.25 Grey's Anatomy. 1.25 Quiz Nightscreen 5.30 ITV Early Saturday April 28, 2007 Call 5.35 Wildlife SOS . Morning News. 6.00 Sunrise 6.55 Franklin. 7.25

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Molly families. 6.20 Everybody Hates Chris. X 9.00 Fat Man's Warning. 6.45 Everybody Hates Chris. Kong and Borneo, Snooker. Live second plays nursemaid to Vera. The Subculture 9.00 5uperstorm, Futuristic round action continues at www.itv.comicoronationstr Documentary following US 7,10 Joey. BLACK SHEEP drama series about The Crucible_ Matches are eel. comedian Steve Daly as he 7.35 Joey. Its like friends but Both scientists trying to divert the best-ot•25 frames and 8.00 The Royal. embarks on a two-week without the laughs. and weaken storms. The played over three sessions, 9.00 Kingdom. A young mission to the UK to warn 8.00 Grey's Anatomy. Medical gigs team have inadvertently 10.00 The Science of woman from Eastern commuters, children and drama following the City Varieties created a superstorm which Superstorms. This final Europe arrives in distress at teenagers of the dangers of fortunes of first year PUNT & DENNIS is now heading for New episode explores future the office. 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The death of Pakistan cricket coach strangulation, poisoning or both'? Rob Woolmer at this year's Cricket Were the dark characters its the Panorama Monday World Cup in the paradise of the murky world of cricket corruption Caribbean was shocking. upsetting behind it? This documentary aims to BBC1 April and most of all mystifying. So many delve into all these uncertainties and 30th questions instantly sprang up: was he emerge with some plausible answers. 8:30p.m murdered ? If so was the method Laurie Whitwell

DON club 671 TWO itv 4 five Bondi Beach Club 6.00 Breakfast 9.15 found. 6.00 CBeebies lei,bles. 6.20 The 6.00 GMTV. 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle 6.10 The Hoot's_ 6.35 The Hoobs. 6.00 The Save-Urns! 6.10 Frit and MENTAL MONDAY 6.25 Franny's Feet. tudent t 10.00 Homes under the Hammer Story Makers. 6.35 Balamory. 7.00 Show. 10.30 This Morning. 12.30 7.00 freshly Squeezed. 7.30 the Flowertots. 11.00 To Buy or Not to Buy. CBBC: Arthur 7.15 ChuckleVision Loose Women. 1.30 ITV lunchtime Everybody Loves Raymond. 7.55 6.40 Bird Bath. 6.45 Funky Town. sDiscotheque 11.30 Car Booty 12.15 Bargain 7.30 Get 100. 8.00 The Story of News; Weather. 2.00 Midsorner Just Shoot Me. 815 Just Shoot 6.50 The Milkshake! Show. 7.20 CHIC BEAT Hunt 1.00 6BC News: Weather. Tracy Beaker. 8.15 Krypto the Murders. 3.00 Hatf Ton Hospital Me, 8.55 Frasier. 9.20 Frasier. Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends. funky house, r'n'b 1.30 Regional News and Weather. Seperdog. Will and Grace. 10.15 7.30 Little Princess. 7.45 Make ClasSICS 8.30 CBeehies• with Jeremy Kyle. 4.00 Daily 9.50 1.40 Neighbours. 2.05 Doctors. Jackanory Junior, 8.40 Cooks. 5.00 The Royal. Without a Trace. 11.10 Without a Way for Noddy. 8.00 Say It With Evolution 2.35 Diagnosis Murder. 3,20 BBC Numberjacks. 9.00 Nina arid the 6.00 Calendar. Regional news, Trace. 12.00 News at Noon. 12.30 Noddy. 8.05 Fill and the MONKEY MAGIC News; Weather; Regional News. Neurons, 9.15 Brum, 9.25 Me interviews and features. Small Railway Journeys. 12.45 Flowertots. 8.20 Peppa Pig 8.25 stage based student 3.25 CBBC: tazytown. 3.50 The Toot 9.45 Something Special. Water Stories. 12.55 Life Begins Thomas & friends. 8.40 Old Bear night Including local weather. Likeaballs. 4.00 Prank Patrol 4.30 10.00 Postman Pat 10.15 The 6.25 Party Election Agn 9a4i4n 1D.5r a5mFa l Ms t :a tryayof Fear Stories. 8.50 Mio Mao. 9.00 The Fab Café Extreme Animals. 5.00 Beat the Roly Mo Show. 10.30 Pathways of Broadcast by the rMriningisR Wright Stuff. 10.30 Trisha SON OF THE VILLAGE Boss. 5.30 Newsround, 5,35 Belief. 10.50 Pathways of Belief. Conservative Party. Milland and Marjorie Reynolds, Goddard. 11.30 five news 12.00 IDIOT Neighbours. 11.10 Social Inclusion Dramas. 6.30 ITV Evening News; 3.30 Countdown. 4.15 Deal or No Home and Away. 12.30 rock, punk & sko 6.00 BBC News and 11.30 Social Inclusion Dramas, Weather. Deal. 5.00 The New Paul O'Grady HouseBusters. 1.00 HouseBusters. Flares Weather. 11.50 Primary Internet Chat Guide 7.00 Emmerdale. Laurel's Show. 1.30 Russell Grant's Postcards. LATE NIGHT LAUNDRY 6.30 Look North; Weather. 12.00 The Daily Politics. 12.30 devastated when she gets 6.00 The Simpsons. 1.35 FILM: The Belarus File (1985). student night 7.00 Victoria's Empire. Here, Working Lunch. 1.00 Watch. 1.15 some bad news. Bob 6.30 Hollyoaks. Zoe comes Thriller, starring Telly Savalas and Victoria visits India, Hong Something Special. 1.30 World panics over the christening home from hospital and the Suzanne Pleshette. 3.35 five news HiN Club Kong and Borneo. Championship Snooker 555 Party costs. other students don't know update 3.40 FILM: Mystery SWEET REVIVAL r'n'b, hip hop & soul 8.00 EastEnders. Bradley Election Broadcast by the 7.30 Coronation Street. how to deal with her Woman: Game Time (2005). comes to a decision about Conservative Party. Steve offers Michelle a 7.00 Channel 4 News. Murder Mystery, starring Kale Rios his relationship with Preeti 6.00 Eggheads. listening ear. Molly works 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: Martin Nina Siemaszko, 5.30 SPIN Billy and Honey disagree 6.30 Great British Menu. Atul out how to make looking Watch this Space. five news. The Subculture over their unborn child. Kochliar and Stuart Gullies after Vera more fun. Ken 8.00 Dispatches: The Indian 6.00 Home and Away. The SNEAKY 8.30 Panorama. Investigation compete to represent the and Deirdre realise the Miracle? Channel 4 News lives of Kit and Rachel hang drum 4n' boss into the murder of cricket South East. Atul serves a extent of their problems. presenter Krishnan Guru- in the balance after a coach Bob Woolmer, with starter of seared scallops 8.00 Road to Ruin: Tonight. Murthy travels across India terrible accident gigs access to the man leading with grape and mint Britain's roads are now in to examine the disturbing 6.30 Two and a Half Men. Cockpit dressing, while Stuart opts underbelly of the country's 7.00 five news. THE ATARIS the hunt for his taller, such a dangerous police deputy commissioner for pea and leek tart condition, compensation economic boom. 7.15 Rich Boys Toys: Jets. Josephs Well Mark Shields 7.00 World Championship payouts for injuries or 9.00 Cutting Edge: Blind The end of the cold war has MID AIR 91 9.00 New Tricks. An elderly Snooker. vehicle damage currently Young Things. Powerful led to many military aircraft lady's body is discovered, 9.00 Million Dollar Pigeon. rival spending on repairs. documentary film following being snapped up as the by her three blind or partially- ultimate executive toys. TE NDERLOIN part consumed Documentary fallowing 8.30 Coronation Street. hordes of cats. British hopefuls in their Emotions run high in the sighted teenage students at 8.00 Fifth Gear. Torn Ford 10.00 BBC News; Regional journey to the most Rovers when Michelle the Royal National College finds out what it's like to DAVE HOUSE News; Weather. tucrative pigeon race in the decides to open up to for the Blind as they adapt be a paparazzi Wardrobe 10.35 Not Going Out. Lee tries world, the Million Dollar Steve. to a newly independent photographer hot on the RACINE to find his serious side by Pigeon Race in South 9.00 Taggart. When a local lifestyle. trail of celebrities in an going on a date with an Africa. activist is found murdered 10.00 ER. Luke, Sam and Gates unassuming Kra Cried. *top tickets author, while Kate 10.00 Ruddy He'll Its Harry in her flat, the Taggart treat a woman who 9.00 Short Angry Men: fel:08709913913 attempts to discover her and Paul. Harry Enfield ream discover that her appears to be suffering Hidden Lives. web: olive.co.uk/tickets lighter side at clown and Paul Whitehouse star in protesting had incurred the from liver failure. but there Documentary about men coming soon to Leeds school a sketch show, joined by wrath of many people and are suspicions that her whose height has seriously MelrOpolltan 11.05 Inside Sport. England Morwenna Banks and Laura anyone could be the problems may be deeper affected their lives in very TWANG' captain John Terry reveals Solon. Featuring a host of culprit than that. different ways THEMa14 y lust what life is like on arid new characters including 10.30 ITV News; Weather. 11.05 The Sopranos. 10.00 Prison Break. (-Note gets off the pitch. Kenny Leyton the hopeless 11.00 FILM: Monday Movie: Christopher's new girlfriend into a tricky situation when SON OF DORIC' boxer. announces that she is the diner he is in is held up. 23 May 11.45 FILM: DOA (1988). Total Recall (1990). Sc-ii Remake of the classic 1950 10.30 Newsnight. actioner about a man who pregnant. Tony and 11.00 FILM: Get Shorty BIFFY CLYRO" thriller stamng Dennis 11.20 World Championship doubts his very identity Christopher find themselves (1995). A loan shark for 26 May Quaid and Meg Ryan. Snooker. when he starts involved in a shoot-out the Miami mob is sent to MARILLION" 1.25 Sign Zone: Ms Dynamite in 12.10 World Championship remembering repressed with a biker gang. LA to collect a debt from a 3 Jun Search of Nanny Maroon 215 Snooker Extra. 2.00 memories. Starring Arnold 12.15 Sex and the City. 12.50 Sex film producer, starring John Sign Zone: Sleep Clinic. 2.55 Sign Eurografters. 4.00 Working Schwarzenegger and Rachel and the City. 1.20 Six Feet Under. Travolta and Gene FROM THE JAM" Zone: it's Not Easy Being Green. with the Spanish. 4.30 Ticotin. 2.20 4 Music: Transmission With Hackman, 3.25 Sign Zone: To Buy or Not to Working with the French. 1.00 UEFA Champions League T-Mobile, 3.20 Dispatches: The 12.55 NASCAR Nextel Cup. 1.45 Buy. 4.10 Joins BBC News 24 5.00 Working with the Weekly. 1.30 ITV Play: Glitterball, Indian Miracle? 4.10 Unreported USPGA Golf. 2.35 NHL Ice Hockey. Germans 5.30 Working 4.05 IN at Reading 2005, 5.00 World 4.35 3 Minute Wonder. 5.10 French Football • Le with the Japanese_ ITV Nightscreen. 5.30 ITV Early 4.40 Empires of Stone. 5.40 The Championnat Morning News Mummy Road Show.

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'7 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 39

1s it geeky to announce that I like CSI? I alongside a smattering cif drama and gore- CSI can't be the only one: apparently the living to work nut whodunnit will prove number of students doing cour,es in interesting andI:...toug, it pros crk iiig. A Tuesday five linensics has increased since it's been week-to-week guarantee Tit he .trait May around. The poiccas ol analysing aims' title the ginge in CSI Miami w ill thin his 9:OOp.m scene evidence is where the show gains Hs sunglasses just helinethe r esenuie titles 1st edge. With ;t different crime eat week- Suzy Tobias

ono DOM ONE TWO itv 4 five club Baja Beach Club 6.00 Breakfast. 9.15 Found. 6.00 CBeebies: Fimbles. 620 The 6.00 GMTV. 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle 6.10 The Harks. 6.35 the 6.00 The Save-Urns) 6.10 Fifi and THE WORM 10.00 Homes under the Hammer Story Makers, 6.35 Balamory. 7.00 Show. 10.30 This Morning. 1230 7.00 Freshly Squeezed. 7.25 the Flowertots. 6.25 Franny's Feet student night ri 11.00 To Buy or Not to Buy (BBC: Arthur 7.15 ChuckleVision, Loose Women. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime Everybody Loves Raymond. 7.55 6.45 Funky Town. 6.50 The Cockpit 11.30 Car Booty. 12.15 Bargain 7.30 Get 100. 8.00 The Story of News: Weather. 2,00 Nlicisomer Just Shoot Me 8.25 Just Shoot Milkshake! Show. 7.30 Little S SLAM DUNK Hunt. 1.00 BBC News; Weather. Tracy Beaker. B.15 CBeebres: Murders 3.00 Half Ton Hospital Me 8.55 Frasier. 9.20 Frasier. Princess. 7.45 Make Way for punk,- ska, emo, metal, 1.30 Regional News and Weather Kryptn the Superdog 8.30 with leremy Kyle 4.00 Daily 9.50 Will and Grace 10.20 Noddy 8.05 Fifi and the hardcore, punk rock 1.40 Neighbours. 2.05 Doctors. CBeebies lackanary Junior. 8.40 Cooks 5.00 The Royal. Without a Crate. 11.10 Without a Flowertots. 8.25 Thomas & Fab Café L35 Diagnosis Murder. 3.20 BBC Numberjacks. 9.00 Nina and the 6.00 Calendar, Trace. 12.00 News at Noon. 12.30 friends. 8.50 Mio Mao. 9.00 The EAR CANDY News; Weather, Regional News. Neurons. 9.15 Brum. 9.25 Me 6.25 Party Election Small Railway Journeys. 12.45 Life Wright Stuff. 10.30 Trisha Altryears of rock and rail 3.25 OK, lazytown. 3.50 Watch Tool 9.45 Something Special. Begins Again. 1.45 FILM: San Goddard 11.30 live news 12.00 Broadcast by the Faversham My Chops. 4.00 The Basil Brush 10.00 Postman Pat. 10.15 The Labour Party, Demetrio, London (1947). Drama. Home and Away 12.30 Britain's CARNAVAL Show. 4.30 Extreme Animals. 5.00 Roly Mo Show. 10.30 Primary 6.30 ITV Evening News; starring Walter Fitzgerald and Worst... Builder, 1.30 Russell samba & salsa music 0 Blue Peter. 5.25 Newsround. 5.35 History Britain Since 1948. 10.50 Weather. Mervyn Johns. 3.30 Countdown. Grant's Postcards. 1.35 FILM: A with Brogan DJs Sits= Neighbours Landmarks: Pakistan and its 7.00 Ernmerdale. Bub messes 4.15 Deal or No Deal. 5.00 The Mother's Gift (19951_ Adventure, & Fobio Bahio 6.00 BBC News and People. 11.10 Churchill's op when Kelly appears on New Paul O'Grady Show. starring Nancy McKeon and Adrian Flares Weather. Bodyguard. 12.00 The Daily Dawn's headstone. Laurel 6.00 The Simpsons. Pasdar. 3.35 five news update. THE HUSTLE 6.30 Look North; Weather. Politics. 12.30 Working Lunch keeps vigil at her mother's 6.30 Hollyoaks. Zak tries to 3.40 FILM Sacrifices of the Heart Pod's Mission. 1.15 prove Will is up to no good. (2007). Drama, starring Melissa HIP) Club 7.00 Castaway. Presenter 1.00 Pod's bedside. Starrett is put out RAISED BY WOLVES Mission. 1,30 World Championship Carmel and Aleksander are Gilbert and Kerr Howard. 5.30 five Danny Wallace drops in to that Daz has a crush on indie dance. punk funk see how they are coping Snooker. 5.55 Party Election Louise discovered by Jacqui. news with introduction of a new Broadcast by the Labour Party. 7.30 UEFA Champions 7.00 Channel 4 News. 6.00 Home and Away. Has Sandanisto 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: Amanda made a huge APOCALYPSE NOW member. 6.00 Eggheads. League Semi-Final: THEN 7.30 EastEnders. Dot is 6.30 Great British Menu. For Liverpool v Chelsea. Watch this Space. mistake) Martha seeks terrified that her secret will the fish course, both chefs Steve Rider introduces live 8.00 How to Look Good Jack's support when she University, Min serve John Dory Stuart Naked. Series in which tells him her life-changing THE TUNNEL CLUB be uncovered. May is coverage from Ardield of Chris Martin with indie, forced to lie when her Gillies pan fries his and the UEFA Champions women who are unsatisfied news. artrock. electro sister arrives in the Square. serves with lobster mash, League semi-final, between with their bodies are 6_30 Two and a Half Men. Chelsea struggles to and Atul Kochhar's is crisp. Liverpool and Chelsea. offered styling, health and 7.00 five news. Wire beauty advice. 7.15 Big Ideas that Changed KISS KISS BANG BANG understand Denise fried and served with With commentary from dirty. funky electronic 8.00 Holby City. Connie's crushed peas. Clive Tyldesley and David 9.00 Jamestown: America's the World. David Blunkett party with Ws Ben Rus- decision to operate on Lola 7.00 World Championship Pleat. Birthplace: A Time MP examines the history of sell, mill Russell & more despite being in the Snooker. Hazer Irvine 10.00 Traffic Wardens Team Special. The Time nationalism and its impact advanced stages of introduces live coverage Confessions. They are Team archaeologists make on British national identity gigs from the quarter-finals, a 400th-anniversary visit to today Atrium Pregnancy has unforeseen Britain's public enemy THE ROSIE TAYLOR consequences. Kyle and where the difference number one. With millions Jamestown, Virginia, the 8.00 Angels & Demons: The PROJECT Harvey reach crisis point between winning and of pounds collected every first permanent English True Story. Film 9.00 Crimewatch. losing is E20,000. year in fines, ticketing is a settlement in America and examining 'The da Vinci ,Cockpit 10.00 BBC News; Regional 9.00 Horizon. Science serious business - and birthplace of the USA. Code' author Darr Brown?s TIGER ARMY News: Weather. documentary about the pressure is on the wardens 10.00 Animal Addicts. Einidin is novel 'Angels and Demons' IV& T4 10.35 Crimewatch Update. proposed use of the Large from above. a nation of pet lovers, but is arty of it based on real 10.45 ONE Life. Director Richard Hatton Colider to yield the 10.30 ITV News; Weather. this documentary looks at events? Macer meets several ultimate goal of physics, a 11.00 Real Crime: A Deadly people whose kindness far 9.00 CSI: Crime Scene Wardrobe people who claim to be the theory of everything. Secret. How nine-yeariold animals has become Investigation. Keppler is NICK TYSON TRIO reincarnated spirit of a 9.50 This World: The Fight David Stocker was slowly obsessionat Including an forced to lace his paSt celebrity. For Cuba7s Music. This and systematically MS sufferer who keeps 70 when an old face turns up *top tickets 11.30 FILM: Dead Poets documentary travels from poisoned by his attentive owls in his house. in Vegas asking him Ina a fbI: 08709 913913 Society (1989). Drama London to Havana to explor but deranged mother. )1.05 Get your Act Together favour. Grissom returns web: alive.co.uk/fickets focusing on an who owns the rights to Fauna, at Great Ormond with Harvey Goldsmith. from his sabbatical. coming soon to Leeds unconventional new Cuba's musk, the Cubans Street hospital. Here Harvey works with 10.00 C51: Miami. Miami's Latin University.... English teacher and his Of the Americans. 12.05 ITV Play: atterball. 4.00 debt-ridden Deightan Festival shifts from samba CINEMATIC ORCHESTRA' ultimately questionable 10.30 Newsnight. Together Forever. 5.00 ITV Working Men's Club, to sombre when a crowded 2 May impact on an elite Vermont 11.20 World Championship Nightscreen. 5.30 ITV Early 12_10 PartyPoker. com Poker dance floor becomes the boys' academy, starring Snooker. Morning News. Nations Cup. 1.10 Lloyds T513 scene of a gang murder. THE MACCABEES• 12.10 World Championship Insurance British F3 International 11.00 Law and Order: Special 12 may 3 Robin Williams and Robert Sean Leonard, Snooker Extra. 100 GCSE Series. 1.40 KOTV Classics. 2.35 Victims Unit. 12.00 FUNERAL FOUR A 1.40 Sign Zone: See Heat. 2.10 Bitesize Revision: French 1. Velux 5 Oceans Ultimate Solo Arrest and Trial. 12.30 FRIEND" Sign Zone: Panorama. 2.40 Sign 4.00 GCSE Bitesize Revision Challenge_ 3.00 KOTV_ 3.30 Arrest and Trial. 12.55 Zone: Tirnewatch. 3.30 Sign Zone: - French 2 Cornball 3000. 3.55 Cornball NBA Basketball. 4.20 FIM Return to Lutlingstone Castle. 4.00 3000. 4.25 Adrenaltn Rush. 4.50 Motocross World Cup. 5.10 Sign Zone: To Buy or Not to Buy. Water Stories. 4.55 Monster Now Is the Time. Night of 4.45 Joins BBC News 24. Garage. 5.55 Inuk. Combat • Kick Boxing .

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With around live story lines running in par- a definite turn-off. The Iasi minute twists allel each week, it's strenuous work keep- ter still thriving too; the discovery that an Desperate Housewives Wednesday ing up with the women of Wisteria Lane. elderly habysiner keeps her dead husband One thing keeping me going is the constant in the freezer is slightly random. but its Channel 4 May intmduction of new man-candy such as certainly expected from this weird nereh- Rick the pizza guy. However Gabrielle's bourIxxxl. 10:00p.m 2nd love interest, a wrinkly mayor candidate is Suzy Tobias

p e p DOB ❑ club ONE TWO itv it 4 five , Beach Club 6.10 Fifi and STUDENT REVOLUTION 6.00 Breakfast. 9.15 Found. 6.00 CBeebies: Fimbles. 6.20 The 6.00 GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle 6.10 The Hoobs. 6.35 The Hoobs. 6.00 The Save-Urnsl student night 10.00 Homes under the Hammer. Story Makers. 6.35 Balamory. 7.00 Show. 10.30 This Morning. 12.30 7.00 Freshly Squeezed. 7.25 the Flowertots. 6.25 Franny's Feet. 11.00 To Buy or Not to Buy. CBBC: Arthur. 7.15 ChuckleVision. Loose Women. 1.30 ITV Lunchtime Everybody loves Raymond. 7.55 6.40 Bird Bath. 6.45 Funky Town. Cockpit 11.30 Car Booty. 12.15 Bargain 7.30 Get 100. 8.00 The Story of News: Weather. 2.00 Midsomer Just Shoot Me. 8.25 Just Shoot 6.50 The Milkshake! Show. 7.20 PANIC Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends. aide, 60s rock'n'roll Hunt. 1.00 BBC News; Weather Tracy Beaker. 8.15 Krypto the Murders. 3.00 Half Ton Hospital Me. 8.55 Frasier. 9.25 Frasier 1.30 Regional News and Weather. Superdog. 8.30 CBeebies with feremy Kyle. 4.00 Daily 9.55 Will and Grace 10.20 7.30 Little Princess. 7.45 Make Creation 1.40 Neighbours_ 2.05 Doctors . Jackanory Junior. 8.40 Conks 5.00 The Royal. Without a Trace. 11.10 Without a Way for Noddy. 8.00 Say It with MILKSHAKE 2.35 Diagnosis Murder. 3.20 BBC Numberiacks. 9.00 Nina and the 6.00 Calendar. Trace. 12.00 News at Noon. 12.30 Noddy. 8.05 Fifi and the student night News, Weather; Regional News. Neurons. 9.15 Brum_ 9.25 Me 6.30 ITV Evening News; Checking Into History. 12.50 Life Flowertots. 8.20 Peppa Pig. 8.25 Thomas & Friends. 8.40 Old Bear Discotheque 3.25 CBBC: Lazytown. 3.50 The Tool 9.45 Somethiny Special Weather. Begins Again. 1.50 FILM: Blowing F.I.LP. Cramp Twins. 4.00 Prank Patrol. 10.00 Postman Pat. 10.15 The 7.00 Emmerdale. A fraught Wild (1953). Adventure, starring Stories. 8.50 Mio Mao. 9.00 The Student anthems 4.30 Extreme Animals. 5.00 Blue Roly Mo Show. 10.30 In Search of Bob does a runner. The Gary Cooper and Barbara Wright Stuff. 10.30 Trisha Peter. 5.25 Newsround. 5.35 Myths and Heroes. 11.30 The Daily King brothers discover that Stanwyck. 3.30 Countdown. 4.15 Goddard. 11.30 five news. 12.00 Elbow Room 5.00 The New Home and Away. 12.30 ['Mains SOUL SAUCE Neighbours Politics. 1.00 Garden Invaders. Hari is testifying against Deal or No Deal. Chico Melo, T-Breaks, 6.00 BBC News and 1.30 Working Lunch. 2.00 World them. Carrie tells Jimmy to Paul O'Grady Show. Worst... Chef. 1.30 Russell Grant's Jbolz & Mr 0-Burt Weather. Championship Snooker. keep his distance from 6.00 The Simpsons. Postcards. 1.35 FILM: LA Law: The 6.30 took North; Weather. 6.00 Eggheads. Scarlen. 6.30 Hollyoaks. Zak discovers Movie (2002). Drama. starring Fob Cafe 7.00 Demolition. John returns 6.30 Great British Menu. 7.30 Coronation Street. the truth on Will's laptop Corbin Bemsen and Susan Dey. THE SCORE 3.25 live news update. 3.30 FILM: psychedelic funk soul to an Irish power station to Competing to represent the Claire and Gail worry about while Zoe makes a unleash yet more South East, for the main Darryl's new living horrifying discovery. Jacqui Cutumbo: Undercover (1992). Faversham devastation. course Stuart Gillies serves arrangements. Blanche is angry with Carmel and Crime, starring Peter Falk and Ed CHASE THE DEVIL 7.30 The Green Green Grass. up roast suckling pig, and realises that she has finally Aleksander. but then she Begley Jr. 5.30 five news. with Bristol's no. I Jamai- Atul Kochhar spices things and Tony are found in bed 6.00 Home and Away. Ethan can expert, DJ Derek Boycie's decision to pushed Ken too far. Ryan motivate his lazy workforce up with lamb rack and pan- wonders what is going on. together and Kelli concoct an evil Flares has unforeseen fried lamb patties 8.00 The Bill: ...and Nothing 7.00 Channel 4 News. plan to blackmail Amanda THE HUSTLE repercussions. Tyler Is 7.00 World Championship but the Truth. When 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: 6.30 Two and a Half Men. traumahsed by the school Snooker. Mickey discovers that Watch this Space. 7.00 five news. Hilt Club 9.00 Natural World. Nature 8.00 Property Ladder, Sarah 7.15 Lemur Island. lhe MOVEONUP art class. Heaton has slept with Mia, Northern Soul, funk 8.00 Watchdog. documentary featuring the he punches the Beeny revisits a Harlaxton Graveyard Gang find 8.30 Car Wars. PCs Bundy and wildlife of Hawaii's famous Superintendent. Will tells couple as they attempt to themselves stranded Mission Norton arrest a joyrider but surf zone and the surfers Emma that Matt has been convert two listed buildings overnight far from home. MISSIONARY find themselves being and scientists who are taking her for a fool ' his into the ultimate family 8.00 How the Other Half student night, house mobbed by his mates. fighting to protect it. girlfriend is alive. home Learns. Documentary Rios 9.00 The Apprentice. The 9.50 Shearwater Island. 9.00 City Lights. A suspicious 9.00 Grand Designs. Kevin series in which six GCSE EXIT 2 teams' next task is to sell Nature documentary How Howie discovers a box of McCloud presents the series pupils from two vastly alternative/cheese British food to French thousands of strange hotel matches in Pauline's following ambitious different schools • an inner nocturnal birds make their building projects. The city comprehensive and a The Subculture people in France. handbag, but when he RUFFAGE 10.00 BBC News; Regional borne on the island of takes Colin there they are Nevilles are building a privileged independent dubstep & urban News; Weather. Bardsey in North Wales, led straight into the hands spectacular oak frame and school - embark on a music with High Pressure 10.35 The National Lottery and an exploration of the of Hatton and Gully. straw bale house in the student exchange. Soundsystem Draws. rich history of the island Robson Green stars. Cambridgeshire Fens, 9.00 FILM: The Sweetest gigs 10.45 My Small Breasts and I. itself 10.00 Get a Grip. Ben Elton and 10.00 Desperate Housewives. Thing (2002). A lovelorn Mixing Tin Documentary which follows 10.00 The Apprentice: You're Alexa Chung check out the Suburban black comedy woman has all but given up NEETA three women as they turn Fired. Adrian Chiles, chef phenomenon of shrinking drama. Gabrielle and Victor frying to find Mr Right until to everything from Jean•Christophe Novelli, celebrities. Are they getting face a crisis when they are the meets an attractive Rios suctioning to herbals pills Heat editor Mark Frith and smaller, or are chocolate blackmailed, Edie gets into estate agent at a nightclub, rNci itetsRP,;: and photo therapy in an Sir Alan's man Nick Hewer bars getting bigger? And a fight with one at the starring Cameron Diaz and 08709 913913 attempt to try to come to discover where it went lint how small is Keira ladies. Christina Applegate. terms with their small wrong tot the newly fired Knightley? 11.05 World of Compulsive 10.40 FILM: Say it Isn't So ive t ct y breasts. candcandidate fromrr 10.30 ITV News; Weather. Hoarders. (2001). An orphan who, tNnEW Oi N RDgG: ORY ' Apprenti 12.10 Peep Show. 12.40 Balls of while searching for his o k 11.45 FILM: Coma (1978). Taut ce. 11.00 Weddings from Hell. 0 709 913913 medical thriller in which a 10.30 Newsnight. Featuring a bride involved Steel. 1.25 The War at parents, accidentally falls in Boston doctor uncovers a 11.20 World Championship in a horrific accident on the Home. 1.50 The Osboumes. love with his sister - who University, Stylus dangerous conspiracy when Snooker. way to the church, a 2.15 The Osbournes. 2.40 happens to be the worst she Investigates 12.10 World Championship wedding threatened by a Your Face or Mine? 3.10 hairdresser in town, FoIMMIs51rieC HESTRA. 08709 91391,s- unexplained deaths at her Snooker Extra. 2.00 BBC suspect package, and a OH Centre. 3.35 Off Centre. starring Chris Klein and hospital_ Learning Zone: Schools: groom who paid a heavy 3.55 The Bernie Mac Show. Heather Graham. 1.40 Sign Zone: The Gardener's GCSE Bitesize Revision: price for forcing on a Mtg. 4.20 Reasons to he 12.30 PanyPoket corn European Year. 2.10 Sign Zone: German. 4.00 GCSE 12.00 ITV Play: Glitterball. 4.05 Cheerful. 4.30 3 Minute Open III, 2.00 Major League Mission Africa. 2.40 Sign Bitesize Revision. The Jeremy Kyle Show. 5.00 ITV Wonder: Lee Kem's A to Z... Baseball. 4.45 NHRA Drag Racing. Zone: To Buy or Not to Buy. Nightsueen. 5.30 ITV Early of Love. 4.35 Wild Things. 3.25 loins BBC News 24. Morning News 5.20 Countdown. ASIAN RESTAURANT & TAKEAWAY

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An horrendously ems hotel tnanager describing the characters of Fawity Chaos at the Chateau blundering around, spitting all kinds of 'Cowen_ But these people nee in feel the itenoilinniophohic dribble, a woman stare of this relatively new documentary Thursday Channel 4 with the social +kills to clean up his which follows a bulbous idiot and his May mess, and a diminutive doge body with sexually frustrated wife as they start up 8:30p.m only a minor grasp of Englieh. You a hotel in Slovakia. could he frrrgiven for thinking I wile Laurie Whitwell 3rd

1:112121 artm TWO club ONE five Baby Juptier 6-00 Breakfast. 9.15 Found. 6.00 Clieehies. Fancies. 6.20 The 6.00 GMTV 9.25 The Jeremy Kyle 6.05 Making rt. 6.10 The Hoobs. 6.00 The Save-Unlit 6.10 Fill and UNKLE MUNKIE FUNKLE 10.00 Homes under the Hammer. Story Makers. 6.35 Calaway. 7.00 Show, 10.30 This Morning. 12.30 6,35 The Hoobs. 7.00 Freshly the Flowertots. 6.25 Franny's Feet lounge funk-out 11.00 To Buy or Not to Buy. C BBC Arthur. 7.15 ChuckleVision. Loose Women_ 1,30 !Tv Lunchtime Squeezed. 7.25 Everybody Loves 6.40 Bird Bath. 6.45 Funky Town. 11,30 Car Booty. 12.15 Bargaro 7.30 Get 100 8.00 The Story of News: Weather. 2,00 Midsomer Raymond. 7.55 Just Stroot Me. 6.50 The Milkshake! Show 7.20 rpe Dien SLAB C Hunt, 1.00 BBC News; Weather, Tracy Beaker 8.15 Krypto the Murders. 3.00 Half Ton Hospital 8.25 Just Shoot Me. 8.55 Frasier, Miss Spider's Sunny Patch Friends. ska, punk metal & 1,30 Regional News and Weather. Superdog. 8.30 CBeerales with Jeremy Kyle. 4.00 Daily 9,20 Frasier. 9.50 Will and Grace. 7.30 tittle Princess. 7.45 Make comic cock rock 1.40 Neighbours. 2.05 Doctor. lackanory Junior. 8.40 Cooks. 5.00 The Royal. 10.20 Without a Trace. 11.10 Way for Noddy. 8.00 Say It with 2.35 Diagnosis Murder 3.20 BBC Numberjacks. 9,00 Nina and the 6.00 Calendar, Without a Trace. 12.00 News at Noddy 8.05 Fill and the Fab Cole 5 News; Weather: Regional News. Neurons. 9.15 Brum 9.25 Me 6.30 ITV Evening News; Noon. 12.30 Life Begins Again. Flowertots. 8.20 Peppa Pig. 8.25 rock & Indie 3.25 CBBC Larytown. 3.50 Watch Too! 9.45 Something Special. Weather. 1.30 FILM. Sergeant Rutledge Thomas & Friends 8.40 Old Bear Flores My Chops 4.00 The Basil Brush 10.00 Postman Pat. 10.15 The 7.00 Emrnerdale, Jimmy and (1960). Drama, starring Jeffrey Stories 8,50 Mio Mao. 9.00 The COPACABANA Show. 4.30 Extreme Animals. 5.00 Roly Mo Show. 10,30 Look and Kelly contemplate doing a Hunter and Woody Strode. 3.30 Wright Stott 10.30 Trisha 0 Blue Peter. 5.25 Nevvsfound, 5.35 Read. 10.50 Music Makers. 11.10 runner, Bob refuses to Countdown. 4.15 Deal or No Deal, Goddard, 11.30 Owe news. 12.00 Halo ROCKSTAR Neighbours. English Express. 11.30 Big Slam return home and lace the 5.00 The New Paul O'Grady Show. Home and Away. 12.30 Briton's bdie & rod: anthems 6.00 BBC News and Poetry 11.50 Primary Geography mess he's left behind. 6.00 The Simpson, Worst... Teenager. 1.30 Russell with DJ Chris Martin Weather. 12.00 The Daily.Polltics. 12.30 6.30 liotlyoaks, Zak and Kris Grant's Postcards. 1.40 FILM: The Laurel decides to stay and ♦ 6.30 Look North; Weather. Working Lunch. 1.00 World look alter her parents. realise The may be in Cockleshell Heroes 11956). War, 1- iA Club HARLEM BUSH CLUB 7.00 Castaway. Danny Wallace Championship Snooker. 7.30 Northern Skies. In a new danger. bill they may be starring Jose Ferrer and Trevor live fare funk, soul & hip- presents a series in which a 6.00 Eggheads. series of helicopter too late whemshe is Howard. 3.35 live news update. hop bands group of Brits learn to 6.30 Great British Menu. For journeys across the North trapped in Will's room . 3.40 FILM: Final Run 0999). survive on an island off the the dessert course, Stuart we lift off for a spectacular 7.00 Channel 4 News. Action. starring Robert Urich and New Zealand coast. Danny Grilles prepares vanilla and flight along the length of 7.55 3 Minute Wonder: Patricia Kalembee 5,30 five new FULL MOON meets the castaways and gingerbread cheesecake, Yorkshire's magnificent Watch this Space. 6.00 Mame and Away. Ric's Rios reviews their week on the and Atul Kochhar serves an coast, from Whitby to the 8.00 A Place in the Sun. last hopes of proving his PUNK AS FCUK island. apple tasting of the South Humber 4i I 131T,I) innocence are destroyed. punk club night 7.30 EastEnders. Stacey East. 8.00 The Bill: Day of iwr r ,111 I. rolowi Amanda. goes to extreme decides to get to Max 7.00 World Championship Reckoning. Emma wakes re-Joer ties 10: lik),000 lengths to protect her The Subculture GIGANTIC through Tanya. Honey Snooker. up frightened in a Sun Hill pun& Simon Laver and relationship. elect cr. rock, Worn. pushes Dot to reveal the 9.00 The Catherine Tate cell after her terrifying fight Arcriana Sirur want to buy 6.30 Two and a Half Men. truth about George. Ian's Show. Award-winning with Matt, Matt comes iiivestmen! property in 7.00 five news. Warehouse plan Co annoy Phil comedy sketch series co- round in hospital and says Tahnr;. rho Estonian capital 7.15 How Not to Decorate, TEQUILLA backfires written and performed by that Emma tried to kill him. 8.30 Chaos at the Chateau. Vat and Tummy's bungalow stucten1 night 8.00 Panorama. Using the versatile comedy Will tries to track down Things are starting to look was once the envy of the Wire shocking undercover actress. Gingers for Justice Nina. up at the hotel neighbourhood with its 70s FUZZY LOGIC footage recorded in two take to the rooftops 9,00 The Last Detective. 9.00 Lie of the Land. pools winner chic and three guitars with DJ Debsiar major hospitals, an 9.30 Roman's Empire. After a Starring Peter Davison Documentary by Molly person Jacuzzi but now it is investigation into alleged drunken night of passion Villain Jimmy the Gent is Dineen demonstrating how looking dated Cockpit gigs serious failings ill UK with Nikki's younger sister murdered before he can in recent years arttd4F,', R.00 Ann Maurice: Interior SAO1NS maternity services Kelly, Lea sees that this publish his memoirs. Do tarring industry anti Rivalry, The four 9.00 Hustle. Drama series could be the perfect way of they hold the due to the countryside have been remaining contestants have FfiFi Club PAMA INTERNATIONAL about a team of con artists- making Nikki realise what identity of his killer? decimated by disease, to pitch their home staging The Hustlers are off to Los she's missing. 10.30 ITV News; Weather. development and ideas to a re-a! client. Packhorse Angeles, where they try to 10,00 The Graham Norton 11.00 Soccer Night. Andy legislation. 9.00 House. House wakes up a INDICA RITUAL get away with selling the Show. Graham Norton Townsend, Peter Beagrie 10.30 FILM: The Score (2001). patient in a crime in order famous Hollywood sign presents a show focusing and special guests discuss Crime drama about a ter help treat the man's Rios ONSLAUGHT` from high in the Hollywood on people, trends and the region's football, professional criminal who dying son.. for lickets ring: 013709 hills aspects of celebrity culture. preview the weekend's had decided to get out of 10.00 Shark. Stark believes that 913913 10.00 BBC News; Regional 1030 Newsnight, fixtures and look at the the business. but is the abduction and murder News; Weather. 11.35 Desi DNA. Asian arts and progress of local clubs. persuaded to work with a of an eight-year•old girl is 10.35 Question Time. lifestyle magazine An 11.30 Local Election Special. hotshot young thief to linked to a similar case *top tickets MI:48709 9 1391 3 11.35 Election Night 2007. international art dealer and Local election sweet with steal a valuable sceptre. horn 15 years ago web: alive.co.ulettickets David Dimbleby leads the playboy extraordinaire live coverage from polling starring Robert De Niro and 11.00 CSI: Crime Scene team for the 2007 focal showcases a collection of stations around the region Marlon Brand°. Investigation. Nick DOWNLOAD FESTIVAL' Indian contemporary ieot.:My Chemical RO, elections, with the Scottish and political analysis in the 12.50 Music Ibiza Rocks with investigates a grisly murder mane, Linkin Park, Iron Parliament Welsh sculptures an a beach in St studio with a panel of Sony Ericsson. 1.20 Rockfeedback. apparently linked to the Maiden - 8th/9th/10th Assembly and 10,000 Tropez_ experts. 1.50 FILM: How to Gel Ahead in 'narcocorrido', a Mexican Jun 4 Castle reenington council seats in England 12.05 World Championship 12.00 ITV Play: Make Your Play Advertising (t989). Comedy, subculture that glorifies Race Track and Scotland up for grabs. Snooker. 12.55 Joins BBC News 4.05 The Jeremy Kyle Show_ 5.00 starring Richard E Grant and crime. 24. 2.00 BBC Learning Zone: ITV Nightscreen. 5.30 ITV Early Rachel Ward. 3,30 Dupe. 3.40 Bus 12.00 Football Night 1.00 Quiz Schools: GCSE Bitesize Revision. Morning News. Pass Boob Jobs. 4.40 Wild Things. Call. 4.00 Dutch Football. 5.10 4.00 GCSE Bitesize Revision. 5.25 Countdown. Football Argentina Highlights.

ASIAN RESTAURANT & TAKEAWAY

Visit our local Asian Kashmiri cuisine, we offer quality and the best of value. Try our Kashmiri cuisine at 25% special discount SPICES for students. Tel. 0113 2435758 Come for the best Fully Licensed 203/205 Woodhouse Street • forget the rest Leeds • LS6 2NY 42 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 OBSERVATIONS \I. - handy tor snacks during the within the UK living with the disease in interval - and me and whole family went. December 2005. Even though this figure is a Wc sat nest to Ids Amin. Who, is the huge increase on the 181 figure just seven President of 1 Iberia_ He's quite affable. years before, the same BINJ article reported Sorry Babs, I mean 'nice. We shared a that "homosexual men remain at greatest nsk McSheep's-Eye-Sour. of acquiring HIV in the United Kingdom. "Yaw jawkin". - Yes "Bahs". I am accounting for an estimated 80 per cent of jawkin. I'm *twin because you've been newly acquired infections that were proba- failed by The Daily Mail. And it pisses bly acquired in the United Kingdom-. Whilst me off. Every' day I have to go through the rate of infection amongst men who have Steven Smith Omar Shtewi life explaining what I am, where my dad is sex with men is showing a marked dextrose. Sarah Haynes tom. that I don't live in a tent. that my the number still remains excessively high. had an epiphany. user Easter. and this mar. when soon a ere little dad doesn't drop me off at ant on the back arguably owing to residual attitudes amongst epiphany surfaced as they so regularly have been socialized in an environ- and someone ry as like. of a frigging camel. That we don't kick the gay population. Aidamap. a website cre- do, with a naked eighteen year old mem where democracy is the noon. it 'How do you say Sarah or mum away in a cupboard under the stairs ated to provide information and support for I straddling me. He asked me out. This boy Iis the given in a situation requiring a John or whatever in Arabic?', dal you rust and bring her out In cook sheep's-eye- the HIV-infected community. reported that decision. But the question is. do 1 believe used to say 'Kharaa' or is that just me?", soup. that she doesn't pin her hijah into approximately 40 per cent of LIK gay men whim, I had known fora while had sudden- in it?. Democracy assumes that the chirped Hind Hassan on the way to her flesh - yes., Muslim women HAVE with 30 or more sexual partners in the last ly turned from an attractive man into a mwority is right - this is an inherent flays Tranquillne to partake of the Anglo-Ay- been asked that. twelve months did not visit a sexual health uncertain boy with little understanding of since the minority may he the ones who rah tradition sit sitting on out arses So. I guess. me and Hind and the other clinic in the last year. anything, scared and, particularly stupidly. are right but so often are they left unrepre- speaking btoken English while smoking Ay -cabs say these things so we can laugh. These statistics show that. even though expecting that I'd go out with him, sented. Do people know how to use soon-to-banned shisha and contemplating And if we didn't laugh. the significant HIV infection rates are increasing amongst I starred to think about age gaps. do they democracy to its optimum without the why our parents decided to bring us up minority of ill-informed and ignorant the 'straight' population and declining work" Catherine Zeta Jones and Michael appropriate education? Do people know here. instead of say. Morocco or Dubai "Babses" would dove us mad with their amongst homosexuals, gay men still pose a Douglas sporting over 25 years difference what is hest for them? Certainly democra- w here sIiisha is ar lot bloody cheaper bull-kharaa. greater risk. I often kook around at the 'gay' and my Uncle and Auntie separated by 19. cy is not best for the minority. Democracy "Khania". by sv a). means "shit". There are of course those who know society (since that is what it seems to be I'd never really thought about such issues is not the answer for the poor. The answer was "yes" tactually , the that Liberia and Libya and Lebanon are called nowadays) and wonder whether the beyond the obvious physical differences., In the development realm, the demo- answer %vas that I used to tell white kids at not the sante. That I don't have a satellite blood legislation is fair. but as I meet the end- but surely there's some really big mental cratic agenda is pushed. Developing coun- school things a lot more ohseene than dish on my tent_ That 1 won't get a camel less throngs out on a Thursday night at Mis- diversity. Perhaps 18-22 is the best gauge. I "kharaa" meant "Sarah"). So I got to wasn't exactly sure of myself at that age. tries are often forced to adopt these demo- ti r ► aduating with a First. And to all of sion or skim though the various articles in cratic measures in order to receive loans thinking... Why do "we". the Anglo-Ay - sou: Thank you for breaking the endless OT at Attitude on the long train journey to which makes me wonder more and 11101C and aid from international institutions such rabs take the piss out of our British friends cycle of Int that tea teasel meant to eau London. I SO11161110 wonder whether the how I ever let myselrget into that position. as the IMF and the World Bank. Yet this is in that way? Imagine the scene... on yet .:.l law is such a had idea. All stereotyping of But then there came another feeling. against the very heart of democracy; the You start your first job. aged 16. gay onsiniscuity aside (as this is NOT the Suddenly not one steering clear of people younger than me. but a new found and ability to choose and to self-govern. Sure- You liagonen. actually. that you've got Omar is a nutter case with all gay men) a large proportion nt ly the desire for democracy needs to conic a foreign name, jet-hla•k hair, a generous gay men in the UK do tend to have many dit- strange attraction I was getting toward older from within and the people need to he nose and gorgeous eyes... Until. that is, ferent sexual partners and there always men. Rich professionals with fast cars and given the avenues to express this desire. you meet Barham or "Bak", if you will remains the harsh truth that anal sex - bulging muscles. Three years at university This sort of forced democracy does not and 1 think you will) and the rest of the whether between two men or a marl ma a at within the last term I decide I want to change the lamer relations which are at stall... Everyone's met "Piths", You wont= - is an incredibly high risk activity become a househusband. Seriously, I think the centre of the development debate. In know the sort. Usually from an inner-city. vis-a-vis HIV transmission. Nevertheless it it's the Bne Van De Kamp of 'The effort fact, democracy should be dissolving these the size of a small armoured vehicle and cannot he said that all gay men are like this. I've put into asserting my masculinity and unequal power relations but it has been twice as loud as OT1C. Many of us want all the same things as a abhorring uber-catnpness has suddenly used as a tool to further hidden agendas. Of course, in these matters. it is 'straight' person wants: to find someone to become a yearning for ironing. cooking, Democracy should he encouraging plural- important fur the Ay 'rah to ensure the love, and spend our lives with them. and are (not that !stereotype the average wife - but I ism and a variety of voices but arguably right pronunciation of his name -first and not the promiscuous hunch we arc perceived think you understand) and cleaning. I li xik at because the majority rules. it is another last. This process can take some time. It to he. In my opinion this stereotyping should the stresses and stains of having a career. form of oppression as indeed a military can he a few minutes, a few hours and Hari Megerisi not necessarily affect the entire group and think - why? Nearly lb years of educa- dictatorship is. From my travels. I have sometimes. just sometimes. "Babs" won't However. upon researching this article tion has taught me what I can achieve and now I'm ready to settle down. get a convert- found that democracy is not the answer to ever say it right... n the UK. LP, well as in many countries and seeing the statistics above. I do wonder poverty. India. the largest democracy in But the name issue is the easy pan. Oh around the world, gay and bisexual men that the blood sets ices are comet to bar gay ible and spend the rest of my days enjoying the world has a high incidence of abject yes. Let me tell you a little something Iare barred from giving blood, being men from giving blond. Whilst there have power lunches and baby-sitting for my poverty and democracy has not cured the about "asylum seekers". See, in Grimsby. considered to be too high risk. As a bisexual been huge leaps and hounds in treatment friends. Perhaps I'll even give-up being gay. society from the ills of poverty. In Burma, where I'm from, there is no difference man.1 am directly affected by this legislation there is still no cure for HIV. The disease. its been a few years now and it's definitely a junta reigns supreme and this sort of between an immigrant -- like my father. and have often thought whether at is neces- upon primary infection, takes around 3 not all it's cracked up to he, without nearly government should he removed. Democ- who's from Libya (or "Lebanon. or sary. The law actually. states that if a man has months to show up in tests - sometimes enough aggression Or oppression for you to racy may provide freedom of expression Lesotho, or Liberia, or Laos or whah-ev- had sex with another man - ever - then he longer - meaning that it is sometimes fight against. Married by 25. children by and self-determination but at is not the ah") and an asylum seeker, Take the time cannot donate blood. Similarly. if a woman missed. It can then take up to seven years thirty. The book club, church group. PTA. answer for the poor. In reality. people who rue and "Baby" were bonding over a has had sex with a gay or bisexual mat, she having the disease before any symptoms village festivals, and a fiercely 'inspirational are entrapped in the cycle of poverty are Richmond Superking in the smoking room is not allowed to give blood for the next 3-6 show. This, coupled with the fact that some woman' on my arm. who feels detached far more concerned about finding the next (piss-yellow walls. brown sofas. Lovely a months. These rules are regardless of gay men are more likely. through their clw- from the children and finds it hard not to bowl of rice for survival than about the She's thumbing through the paper when I whether you used protection or even if you sen lifestyle make diem more likely to catch bring her work home. 1 could catch up on processes which seemingly affect the say "paper" I mean The Daily Mail). know the HIV status of your sexual partner the virus. I do. however, think that the law is my 24. Lost, House, Rome., teach my chil- higher realms of government. If people are Then it starts... (her example, if they were reoently tested), slightly discriminatory and many changes dren football, an, culture. By 45. I'm Steven to effectively participate in the ways of "Ocxxioh these elfin' asylum seekers Many people argue that barring gay and need to be made to it. Many gay men in mod- Ripley ( my wife's surname) CBE: public democracy. surely then we should he get on my tits. See Aaw-mah, this is why bi-sexual men from giving blood is a dis- em society live with long term. monoga- speeches and an acclaimed BBC 3 docu- widening their other freedoms first. I can't get into the elfin' dentist, Aw naw criminatory mling harking back to the days mous, partners and. after testing, it can be mentary ensue. So do 1 believe in democracy? I believe love, I don't me YOU, You're alright. of the 0170s and 80s when the HIV scare said 1(X) per cent whether they are ink:tactl or My children become lawyers and doc- democracy is the lesser of the evils but we Am sure your dad's lovely. It's them was at its height and many people viewed it not. Similarly, saying that a man who has tors and wine to visit when I' en not fulfilling still have vet to reach the ideal. My pur- uvra.s. Bastards. Where's your dad from as a "gay cancer" and there was general fear experimented once with another man is my duties as the local, independent M.P. A pose is not to argue whether democracy is again? Lebanon?" that allowing gay and bi-sexual men to give barred for life From giving blood is extreme cynic might say my new found love of fam- right or wrong for society. it is about I could correct "Babs". I could take the blood would be dangerous. Today. however. and disiTiminatory and needs to be altered. ily values has come from a recent trip with resuming the debate once again on the time out of my life to tell her that my dad we now know that it is not an exclusively. The blood service needs to realise that gay Action and a group of teenagers. But it does issue of democracy itself so that as a soci- is a British citizen who has never claimed 'gay' disease and in fact. in 2005 the British and bisexual men are not all promiscuous make me think what would happen had I not ety we can avoid the pitfalls of apathy and benefits and has never taken a place at the Medical Journal published an article stating and unsafe in sex and that they too have a been gay: the affairs, the ability to be naked not only remember those who fought for dentist at the expense of "Babs" (who, that the rate of infection amongst heterosexu- right to give bkiod and that in these limes of around my male friends without them think- our freedom to vote but to also examine incidentally. has clearly NEVER seen a al couples was just under Ill per cent, a num- health and safety regulations, where all blood ing I was peeving on them. Perhaps that one our own agendas in the promotion of dentist in her life) but it amuses me to get ber which had been growing hugely since is tested anyway upon donation, the laws isn't so far from the truth. Ah well, I ife, as democracy throughout the world. So my own hack. 1991. need to be slightly changed to allow for the ever. goes on: but for a second there, I was often, we accept democracy yet we don't "Yes. He is from Lebanon." However. whilst these figures show a men who know for sure what their HIV sta- definitely tempted. question it. is democracy universal? "Saaw, is that like a. Shar-ee-iih Law marked increase in awareness and protection tus is. and who are in monogamous relation- Democracy is not synonymous with free- place?" There is no Sharia law in amongst the gay and hi-sexual population. ships. Steven Smith just happened to be in dom and we need to decide which should Lebanon for Libya. where my dad is and a worrying decrease in awareness the office when HanifLeylabi let us i come first. actually from) amongst hetemsexuals, it must he noted that Hard is a second year student down on his observation. lie's gone "Yes Babs. Sharjah law. We cut off the majority of 'straight' people living with a bit weird recently. Sarah is in Ghana. people's heads. In fact. I remember the the disease in the UK had acquired it abroad, first beheading I ever saw. It happened in with only about 566 heterosexuals infected Death Square - just across the road from 20 , ° ..eeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 43

Nee DIARY (15) 18.30 20.45 Leeds Revelation Rock Gospel Speed Dating Badminton Meet Cinema 300 (15) (1h56) Choir Concert Stylus. doors 7pm outside Sports Centre, 11.30arn, £2 Fri, Sat, Mon: 12:40 18:10 for 7.30 start. £4 Giving a brand new twist to the tra- Sun: 18:10 Tue: 12:40 nil a Licht A range of contemporary and tradi- ditional game you used to play at Subtitled: Sun: 12:40 The: 18:10 tional gospel music from Swing school. Whether you're single or in Events ['his Week's Releases: Alpha Dog (15) (1h56) Low to the Beach Boys to Sister Act. a relationship come and give it a ("he Breed (15) (1hr50) Fri: 12:20 15;00 17:40 20:30 23:20 tr Y• iaVSun: 10.20 Daily: 12.35 14.45 Sat: 17:40 20:30 23:20 27th Sun: 17:40 20:30 17.0019,20 21.30 Hollywood Dance Show 2007 1st May Mon, Tue: 15:00 17:40 20:30 ;smith 7ri/Sat Late: 23.40 Refectory, 7.30pm, £5 LSR Gig Briggate, 12-6prn, Free 30th qext (12A) (11n55) Blades of Glory (12A) (1h33) Urban beats -Bollywoocl chic. With LUU Performing Societies collective Time Management for Revision 20:15 iat/Sun: 09.45 Daily: 12.00 14.15 Fri, Sat: 13:10 15:40 18:00 the Sri Lanka"; Society. Free food (Opera, Stage Musical, A-capella Mtg Rm 8 - Arc, 5pm - 7pm. £2 " 16.30 18.45 21.00 22:40 provided. All profits go to charity. Singers etc) are taking over for the Feeling stressed? Then make the Sun, Mon, Tue: 13:10 15:40 18:00 day. most of your revision period with 7n/Sat Late: 23.15 LSR will be there hosting the 71 Reno 911 (15) (1hr40) 20:15 day so either come down and this session which will help you Fracture (15) (1h53) plan your time and fully prepare for lat/Sun: 11.10 Daily: 13.10 15.05 27th & 28th check it out or listen online. 17.10 19.10 21.10 Fri, Sat: 11:40 14:20 17:00 19:45 Beer and Cider Festival Old Bar all those important exams. 22:30 7ri/Sat Late: 23.10 Bringing you another taste of the Sun: 11:40 14:20 17:00 19:45 'e (I2A) (2hr55) best in local ale and guest ciders. 2nd Fa Ra Rum Purn Mon, Tue: 14:20 17:00 19:45 2nd May iat/Sun: 09.65 After the success of the Ale Festival "Can We Stop Global Warming Improve your Memory Mtg km 8 Daily: 13.25 16.40 19.55 Meet the Robinsons (U) (1h42) in October, this semester there is Destroying the Planet?" Rm 2 - Fri, Sat, Sure 10:40 an even wider range of bitters, Arc, 5pm. Free - Arc, 5pm - 7pm, £2 Fhis Is England (18) (21u-05) Another study skills session held fichei Sat/Sun: 10.25 Daily: 12.55 15.40 Mr. Bean's Holiday (PG) (1h29) stouts and pales. An amazing selec- Talk by Jonathan Neale - author of Fri, Sat, Sun: 10:10 12:30 14:40 by the Union to help you manage flak.18.05 20.30 Fri/Sat Late: 22.55 tion for just £2.20 a pint. Including forthcoming book 'Stop Global 16:50 19:15 21:45 Warming - Change the World'. your revision. Learn ways to keep jtr, 9100 (15) (21r20) more entertainment than ever Mon, Tue: 14:40 16:50 19:15 21:45 those important facts and figures .Ew' Daily: 13.40 (except Sat/Sun) 16.20 before - with folk music, their first ti Noddy and the Magical Moon- securely in your head until you 19.45 Fri/Sat Lates: 22.40 ever chess tournament, DJs, games, dust (11) ( lhl ) Sun: 10:30 3rd need to use them. alpha Dog (15) (2hrs20) raffles and quizzes. Table booking mead Open Season (PG) (IMO) Canvas Culture Night Brudenell, , 1at/Sun: 09.50 Daily: 12.30 15.15 service available P18.00 20.40 Sat. Sun: 10:30 Spin -11.30pm, £3.50 gm The Reaping (15) (1h39) Art, Short Film, Music, Creative 3rd 111, Fn/Sat Late: 23.25 Fri. Sat: 00:00 Writing, Art dating game. Showcas- Running your own RAG Event olm Fracture (15) (2h.r15) 28th tdifl Sat/Sure 09.40 Daily: 12.15 14.50 Shooter (15) (2114) Wind Band Concert Great Hall, ing the best of creative arts, get Mtg Rm 5 -Arc, 5pm - 7pm, Free Fri. Sat, Sun, Mon, Tue: 15:20 21:15 involved and shape the arts com- Have you taken part in or seen any itllilf 17.25 20.20 7.30pm, £3 (£2 LUUMS) of the RAG events this year and pefg 'ri./Sat Late: 23.00 TIVINT (PG) (1h27) With conductor Simon Lee. Enjoy munity, Fri, Sat, Sun: 10:50 thought you might like to have a rind Blades of Glory (12A) (lhr55) First Suite in E flat Gustav Hoist, Wild Hogs (12A) (1h39) go? Come along to this session run dale Sae 10.05 Daily: (12.20 not selections from Chicago and music meld Vue/Thur) 14.35 16.50 19.05 21.20 Fri, Sat: 11:10 13:30 16:00 18:30 from Gladiator. by Ed Rex RAG Co-ordinator and find out what running your own Fri/Sat Lates: 23.35 21:00 23:30 Give it a Go • Curse of the Golden Flower (15) Sun: 11:10 13:30 16:00 18:30 21:00 RAG event really involves. it 2hr15) Daily: 13.35 18.55 Mon, Tue: 13:30 16:00 18:30 21;00 29th 27th Indian Head Massage Conference t Meet The Robinsons (U) (2hrs) Carnegie Great Student Run air ,at/Sun: 11.00 13.40 Headingley Carnegie Stadium - St Classic Party Games Mtg Rm 3 - Hall - Arc, 5pm - 7pm, £3 Arc, 5pm - 7pm, £3 This massage is carried out over Viz Bean's Holiday (PG) ( Ihr50) Hyde Park Picture House Michaels Lane, loam It's time to relive your childhood the clothing in a seated position. '10 Sat/Sun: 10.50 Daily: 13.20 15.30 A Skin dash to the Leeds Met Stu- and take part in a fun filled evening The shoulders, neck, scalp and face 414,17.50 20.10 FRI Curse of the Golden Flower dent Campus in aid of charity, fea- of Pass-the-Parcel, Pin the Tail on are all worked to release tension in 0:dine Reaping (15) (2hrs) (15) 18.30 20.45 turing celebrity runners and a vari- the Donkey and doughnut eating the body. This treatment helps par- 1100 hi/Sat Late: 22.20 SAT Chicken Run (U) 12.00 ety of entertainments. For more info competitions. ticularly with reducing headaches, Aso Shooter (15) (21u-25) Sat/Sun: 10.35 Into Great Silence (U) 15.15 and to join in the race. visit stiffness, and eyestrain and is the Daily: 16.10 21.35 Curse of the Golden Flower (15) www.leedsrnet. ac.u.k/greatstuden- ftiluo perfect massage to learn for both ew au (211r10) 18.30 20.45 trun or call 283 8686 Sunshine (15) 28th beginners and experts. ova Daily: (12.45 not Sat/Sun) (15.50 not SUN Into Great Silence (U) 15.15 Jitsu Meet outside Sports Centre, Sat/SunlTues) (18.20 not Curse of the Golden Flower (15) The Orange Award for New Writ- dijoa; I 2pm - 2pm, Free for Sat/Sun/Tues) (20.50 not Tues) 18.30 20.45 ers The Carriageworks - Millenni- Jitsu is a martial art based on the Fri/Sat Lates: 23.50 MON Curse of the Golden Flower um Square, 2pm, £5 traditional styles of Jiu-Jitsu that nib Wild Hogs (12A) (2hr) (15) 18_30 20.45 This year's shortlist will be originated and developed in 1,, Sat/Sun: 10.40 Daily: 13.00 15.20 TUE Downfall (15) 18.00 announced at the event. The trod0 medieval Japan. It can improve Do you have a one off event you • 17.40 20.00 Fri/Sat Late: 22.30 Curse of the Golden Flower (15) Orange Award for New Writers, reit physical and personal wellbeing want include in the LS2 diary? - Audio Description Available On 21.00 part of the Orange Prize for Fiction. and is also an effective system of email details to: Ire All Performances WED Into Great Silence (U) 15,15 was set up in 1992 to raise the pro- Curse of the Golden Flower (15) file of female writers. self-defence. [email protected] by Tuesday. 18.30 20.45 VUE: Rirkst all Road THU Curse of the Golden Flower 30th 29th ISRAEL'S...

itf Lkzu- Diary. the cusp of a library surrunons! Not for decisions to make (Oh God). But it was- to this ration. 1 don't care what they say. imagine how fair trade and happy-caf- .,a lie the first time. I felt like a thief, i had n't as if I ever thought I meant it. In fact, cake parties and diets are compatible. feine everyone would he, and there was coiled on my bed with a hull- become one of my most hated students: it would have been disappointing if' I The night was so lovely, everyone would be no unfair labour. I hate os,. decapitated library hook when a voice the person who hogs a honk for months, had done what 1 said I'd do, because poised with a Mass and a summer dress Labour! What amma supposed to do frny conscience?) demanded I check my oblivious to the fact that someone else then 1 would have been satisfying a false (the girls. that is, not the boys), every- when I leave degraduation? Why do v710 renails. Not my desperately needs it. because they don't and ridiculous expectation of myself. one having grown-up dinner talk. I was they only have two tills at Starbucks'! 01' leluvespiregirls4vackhotmail.com read 'RECALL. SOMEONE ELSE By getting dangerously drunk at a tea intelligent at the beginning: 'Yes. Yes. love Shakespeare. The library's imite address, my real one. Having not done HAS REQUESTED THIS BOOK' e- and cakes party after reading the e-mail, Mugabe is a terrible man. I know mean...* 1 ,*,,e this since before the Easter break, my mails. I displayed great self-understanding. Britain is reluctant to intervene because I'm told a kind and very handsome There is only one absolute cure for My friends' smug faces (I'd pompously of her embarrassingly colonial past, but young man fa friend of an acquaintance I ie.! jilbOX was rather whored. I was happily deleting everything, until I reached a severe depression - amnesia, Banging insisted yesterday I would be too busy really. Don't you think we should forget escorted me. by cab, home. That LIBRARY NOTICE. I followed the yourself very hard on the head to taint for parties), were met by my even smug- Iraq, send our troops to Zimbabwe. and acquaintance informed me that my face liberate the country? To hell with the was in the gentleman's crotch, despite IobeP 'overdue' link. It was E51,0. Over £5 in yourself' with the condition is a bit dras- ger face. I told them I'd done everything ,net's debt to hook keepers! My favourite peo- tic. Drowning brain cells in alcohol is a I needed to do. and now I was hungry UN, the money and America!' Linfortie tins objections, the whole ride home. I'm ,00 Plc• It was ton much. Too much. As if good escapist's alternative. O.K. so I For all the night. I allocated myself lour nately. copious amounts of rose and told when he asked me where I lived. 010. existing on the very edges of an over- vowed not to go out again this term chocolate muffins. four chocolates. sugar turned my talk to: 'Seriously. originally pointed to Halo. I remember draft (even after the loan has conic because I had essays to write and exams three chocolate biscuits. and four choco- Suu'hucks should become the president stumbling into my door. I remember through) wasn't to rev ise for and moduleidissertat ion late brownies. Was v proud that I stuck of Africa! Rah, Rah. I mean, can you heing sick on a library hook. enough. now I was on 44 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007

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Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday. April 27, 2007 45

the Premiership title race. We're also Tom is a hit of a Rugby League expert. your interest in getting involved in the going to include more features. and Darts. if you count that as a sport! show. or simply join in the sporting "You could write LS: Like. what? And reaular guest and cockney wide- debate and we'll read the best com- boy Alex the turned np to the show last ments out on air. what I know about JR: Well. we've had the PFA team of the year this week no less than eight week in a bright yellow three-wheeler) L.B:Have you had much interest so Rugby and Cricket Man Utd players! ). so we're going to is a jack-of-all-trades. he knows stuff far? on the back of a get everyone on the shim to come up on everything. from poker to U.S. JB: It's begun slowly but we're hoping stamp!" with their Premiership team of the sports. that once more people find out about us year, and we're also going to review LS: Where do you plan to take the then it'll snowball and we'll have real- the day's papers, to get a broader cov- show in the long-fern:? ly exciting debate on the Facehook Joe Barnsley erage of sports in. JB. Well. if we haven't been kicked off aroup and on the show. Host of `The Final Whistle' on LSR LS: Do you think that any Everton air next year (Laughs) we want to LS: What sort 4. audience are you players deserve a place in the PFA include all the varsity sports. We aim hoping to attract? team? to get varsity players on the show each JB: Everybody! We want to attract LS: Hi. Joe. Your new sports talk show JB: Mikele Arteta, without a doubt. week to big-up their teams and to join people who love sport - the people who started last Friday: how did it go? He's been phenomenal this season, a in with the debate. We also want to know their stuff - hut. also. people who JB: It was exciting to get on air. but we creative dynamo! Tim Cahill might encourage students to go to the BUSA have lost touch with sport: we can get had a few technical mishaps! (Laughs) have made his way into the side if he matches. getting people involved and them back into it. But the discussion was really good. It wasn't injured at Shelf Utd a few excited in sport at the University. flowed nicely and there was a decent months back. Every week there's great live sport FINAL WHISTLE IS bit of banter so. hopefully, we can keep LS: Does football dominate the discus- around the campus and at Weetwood that going. sion, then? that people are missing: we want to ON EVERY FRIDAY LS: So,. what kind of things do you talk JR: (Laughs) Football is certainly my help get people to the games to support FROM 2-2.30. GO TO about? speciality - you could write what I our areat teams. JB: We preview the weekend's sport- know about Rugby and Cricket on the LS: Si), how can people ger involved? LSRFM.COM AND ing action. debating all the big-issues back of a stamp! - hut. thankfully. JB: If you see me around Uni, just grab CLICK ON 'LISTEN that are coming up in the week ahead. surrounded by a great team with broad- me and let me know: I'm very Champions' League and the Rugby er sporting knowledge. approachable! Otherwise, go through NOW'. featured heavily last week; this week, LS: Who's on the team. then? The new Motty: Joe Barnsley the Facebook group (Final Whistle). we're going to look at the Snooker and JB: My co4tost and fellow Evertonian PHOTO:Joseph Hibbard get on the message boards to show

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For more info & full programme, check out: careerweb.leeds.acuk C M S Cameron McKenna 46 Leeds Student www.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 Paying :the price

With attendances dropping at many English grounds, Ky Cape! finds out why

Football fans are essential RI any team: milestone of watching 1,000 consecutive nearly, 30 years. I don't think rve missed without them, clubs would struggle to Dale games. But he wasn't counting, and anything in the last six or seven years." European football ticket prices survive. Yet. it is the fans who appear to says that it's not just the litre of feiotball So how much does Martin have to be the ones being treated with a distinct that keep% him going through the spend in order to pnwe his loyalty to lack of respect. In a recent survey earned turnstiles even week, "It's the day out England' "From a cost point of view. it Club Price out by Football Fans Census, 88 per cent every week with my mates. If you look at gets as lei ridiculous at times. World Cups Coca-Cola League 2 (average) £16 of fans think match tickets are not value Rochdale. anyone in their right minds cost a lot if money. On an annual basis? for money. However, they just can't stop wouktn't go week in week out But. for Thousands." Coca-Cola League 1 (average) £19 going. us. it's a social thing. completely." A recent campaign by The Sun titled Every weekend. hundreds of Leeds United have been on :1 'Cut the Price of Foote'. which 33 MPs, Coca-Cola Championship (average) £24 thousands of devoted supporters travel up coaster ride in the last several years. They including Prime Minister Tony Blair, and down the country in the hope of reached the Champions' League semi- have pledged their support to. has had Leeds United £30 seeing their team pick up three invaluable finals rn 2001, were relegated from the sonic influence In dubs' pricing Inter Milan £13.50 points. Whether their team is riding high Premiership in 2004. then almost eta hack structures tor next season. Football fans in in the Barclays Premiership or in the top-flight in 2006. only to lose in top European countries like Italy. Spain, Bayern Munich £8 languishing in the lower regions of Coca- the play-off final to Watford, and are now France and Germany pay much less than Cola League Two, the sentiment. and facing possible relegation to Coca-Cola fans over here do. Lyon £13.50 desire. is equal, League One. Martin thinks English pees arc crazy, Despite the mats amounts that dubs Yet. Leeds have a strong base of "Match tickets are a joke: anything Real Madrid £17 charge their fans in sit anxiously on the dedicated fans who will never give up surrounding England is ridiculous. A home and away he considered an average cost of a season ticket by £27 edge of their seat through 90 minutes of their season tickets, despite the prices they frrendly at Old Trafford will cost you 4 addiction? I asked Stephen Wage, a next year torture, more often than not, people are charge_ Rainy Buchan is u final-year quid_ However a few ;leap, ago, when psychology professor at Leeds What is the danger of clubs letting the still prepared to pay the extortionate Broadcast Journalism student and a England played Spam in a friendly in Metropolitan University what he thought: prices soar too high? Bill Gelliffd. prices_ Students. even. m clubs do now kietil,';Uet I Leeds follower Here's what he Madrid. a ticket east tem. That's just daft" "Addiction is a negative word. Addictions Professor of Sport Management and '7,Zt ,11- iIKRF7i1 Jan can understand why the English are things that you hope people can be Finance at Leeds University, says' "What clubs charge as much as they do, "The weaned rat On the other hand. you can would he a tragedy for the game. r4it, draw of tixaball is such in this country use more positive words like dedication particularly at the top end, is if the pricing now ilea tans will pax anything to watch and loyalty. I think there's a balance. It's policies force the young kids away .from mt. At lower league level, there's going to good to he loyal to a team that you're the game. Because then you've lost a fan Ix 2.000 fans who will tunt up to every fund of. but it's bad to let this get a hold for life, and 50 years of consumer Rome game. and they can charge what of you." business from that individual." they, want. Whereas, abroad, fans are Here's what the fans think. Donny says: So. could our dedicated fans ever see obviously not turtling up. so they have to "Yeah_ it could definitely he :set addiction, themselves stayine in on a Saturday charge less." 1 don't think it's an addiction like alcohol afternoon? Apparently not. "I know loony says that ticket prices in or drugs because your body can cope people who have slopped going. I England are frustrating. particularly when without football but I don't think many couldn't see myself not going if I had the you can see players like Rohinho and people's.brains cou chance to go even week" says Jan. hinny Raul for less than Leeds United's flops. "I Jan holds a similar opinion: "It could is of a similar voice: "I hope I will net er think the prices fans mire eapected to pay be an addidion. Sonic people say it is a he unable to go because ot ticket prices. across the country are ridiculous. Leeds is very passionate hobby. It starts to became but you just never know," particularly had but it always has been, to an addiction when you go for the sake of Strong. hardcore bases of fans will some extent, as it's supposedly the third going. As tong as you get enjoyment out continue to turn up regardless. Tottenham biggest city. in the country. Up until Ken of it. l think it's still a hobby but. if you have the fourth-highest percentage of sem. - Bates came in. there had been a ticket are going just for the sake of going. that's attendance in the Premiership. On mareoN11 111 freerst liar hair years, and Bates rightly when you need to start thinking." average, they till 98.4 per cent oaf White ONE MAN AND HIS SON: If ticket prices fail to drop, will this be a had to raise them fil111 km keep sight for the future? Some high-profile clubs, such as Hart Lane every week: this gives them the up with the trend and inflation. I dim think Bolton Wanderers and Blackburn Rovers excuse to raise prices like they have done. have a student discount in place on match. thinks of the desire to watch his home that Premiership prices. for lower tier who are both suffering front The time, though. will surely conic and season. tickets. However. some of the team: -They. are the club I love. It's really football. is wrong hum it seems to be inure mmendanees, have announced that they when the dubs will have to listen to the bigger clubs have vet to install such a as simple as that" about the business than the fans now. will lower ticket prices next season. crowing concerns of the tans: otherwise, policy. Manchester t lotted. Arsenal. The average season ticket price at "However, I do think that football in Arsenal, where the best seat in the house [he table may turn and it will he the fans Liverpool and Tottenham Hotspur show Leeds minors that of their fierce rivals England is much better than that in Italy costs a massive £94, are to freeze ticket holding the clubs to ransom. Fan power no signs of offering students a tower rate. Manchester United,. who, by contrast, are or Spain. and definitely Germany." pnces for the nest campaign. A small must prevail, but it will take drastic action top of the Premiership. in the final of the Wolfgang Keinhorsi is a German Chelsea do. but only to students who are gesture R./ the summers. one would for all the clubs, even the big fish, to club members, of which a fee is required FA Cup and the semis of the Champions teacher at Leeds Metropolitan University. suggest, but it is a better scenario than that lower prices to what supporters want, and League. Ray Fell. Chairman of the Leeds who himself tries to watch his hometown to join. over the way at their fierce rivals deserve. Jan Harwood. a third-year History United Supporters Club, thinks this is club as much as possible. "You can net a Tottenham, who will he upping the student, is an avid Rochdale fan. and unfair. "'Ilse season ticket range at Elland ticket in Bochum and stand for 10 curios. never misses a game home or away. He Road certainly in the Championship is the which is £7 or so St) a hit of a difference saw his first Dale game at the age of two. highest, and I think it's hieher than many compared to over here." and then, when he got older, it became a Premiership teams. Manchester United The average cost to watch a Coca- natural habit to follow his hometown side. has some prices that are lower than Leeds, Cola League Two side. like Rochdale. is Rochdale are currently 18th in Coca- Sit it does seem unfair." Elf). however. the •average price of a Ctila League Two. and they are Summers often bemoan the vast Bundesliga game. the top flight in celebrating their centenary year. but the amounts of money they have to shell out German 4 fixatd], is just El 3. Does club don't have much to celebrate from on travel costs following their local club Wollgane think. then. dial English fans their 100-year history. They have never arms, the country. So, then, what ahout air being ripped (UV "I think that it is not won a tritphy. have been SIi the same England fans, who travel to the likes of value for money here any more. The league for 34 years, and have only ever Azerbaijan. America and Japan to spur prices that you hear being quoted for at achieved promotion once. hack ai 1968. the lads on? They've certainly witnessed Premiership game are just horreodous, Despite this lack of success, or even some drama over the years. mostly in i40 for just one ticket. I don't think drama, Jun explains what keeps. him unsuccessful penalty shoot-outs. the fans get what they deserve really." going: -They don't Win Often. Mt you Martin O'Hara. Yorkshire A Birmingham City fan recently don't want to miss it when they do win." representative for England fans at the FA. uonlessed he had gone 125.000 in debt One of Jan's fellow Rochdale has been following England for years. "I and had to re-mortgage his house from followers. Nick Brierley. recently [cached think I've been going to England games f011owing football. In light of this, could ELLAND ROAD: Leeds charge Premiership prices for lower end the astonishing, some may say foolish, all my life. or, at least, it seems that way, watching your favourite team every week, • Championship football

Leeds Student wvvw.leedsstudent.org.uk Friday, April 27, 2007 47

And the winner is.. • Good week All the nominations for this year's end of season awards

Club Colours Full Colours 1411Ac Bullse e •American Football •American Football kigreat result in the Clunegie cup as the By Joe Hibbert usial at this level, were set up as the com- Juan Serial° Vital. Ian Wiese Ben Barker. Luke Brafield, Danny • and Leanne Wagstaff petitors prepared to show what they were *Athletics Thompson team beat last year's made of. Leslie Addy 'Boat tOtal and finished While St Patrick's Day is usually associat- •Badminton Haines do Reu There was a good team showing for second overall. ed with drinking copious amounts of Guin- Simon Canning.Charlotte Wiltshaw 'Cycling ness and putting on faux-Irish accents, over Leeds at the novice longbow event, and •Basketball (w) Ste Adsheaxl,Tom Burnley, David Wright lour hundred keen archers, novices to individually, as Leanne Wagstaff clinched Nicola Snowden 'Netball Man Utd & Chelsea those more experienced. from all over the the gold medal in a tightly fought competi- •Boat Danielle Bartlett Two second-half goals from Rooney country. convened to compete in a whole tion l'or novice barebow, Alasd•n Edge, Matthew' Ryan. Martha •Snowriders Williams, Anna Wakeling I lannall Davies. Nicola Millington leave the Red Devils favourite to da)'s extravaganza_ After a whole day of hard fought com- •Canoe •Ultimate Frisbee progress troll' their Hosted here at Leeds University. with petition, Edinburgh clinched first place Adam Dumulo, Sara James. Gilly Turner Robert Wilson semi final. w here they the help of Bradford University and Bronre overall, but the Leeds team can be very •Cheerleading will probahl) meet archers. 33 bosses. the square straw targets proud of its perfomiances. Katie Jepson White Rose Chelsea. who •Cricket (In) Natalie Freislich - Cheerleading overcame t alia 1 I c ..... Mark Ashcroft, Rupert Hartley. Thomas Paul Steiner - Badminton surprisingly la. klustre ,o.. • Menlaht John Richardson - Cycling •Cricket (w) Serena Hannah- Fencing Liverpool side on Sarah-Jane Lock Nick O'Donaghue - Men's Football Wednesday nein. Itikl...t1)t• 1 •Cross Country Wendy Voo - Women's Rugby Union Ben Jukes Andrew Currie- Table Tennis •Cycling Michelle Cretxt John Richardson Gryphon Kiska oDancesport Laura Beardsmore - Aikido Despite his side Hugh Morgan - American Football Naomi Horton. Alex Pirmn going down 3-2 at 'Fencing Richard Yates- Athletics ti Old Trafford. the , Robert Walker Harvey Clear- Boxing •MAFC Lauren Griffiths - Women's Cricket Brazilian Kaka , I Luke Covey. Ben Hicks. Adam Mason, Adam Grice - Cross Country completely outshone Dan MeEwan. Christopher Nunn Joe Symonds - Cross Country Cristiano Ronaldo in Home on the Range: Some of the participants at the St Oatricies Day •WRFC Mary Ferrier - Cycling what was billed as event Photo. Peter Slack Jane Burgess. Rebecca Motions Andy Battershy - Men's Football the clash of the two •Golf V ikki Johns - Gymnastics best players a I i1w world. I .uey Barker Sarah White - Women's Rugby Union Continued from Back Page rage of Sheffield Hallam. Cymnasties Adam Bleakley - Table Tennis Gabriel Akin produced a superb 3rd • Heather Parr. Sean Malone Stephen Denny -Table Tennis leg on the bend takine the team into pole First to step up were the Leeds Uni girls. 'Hockey (n) Steve Medley Tenpin Bowling . changeover with Charlotte Gaynor, Chloe Scott. Caroline position and a fluid Tom Ginty, Seh Jones, Will Rogers , Pete Line Ultimate Frisbee Sri Lanka Steve "10.7" Parsons brought the team Sellers and Lucie Shipley, in the Martin Stonehouse, Mark Withernw A powerful katinglk7 4x100m. They produced swift home to v ictory. meaning once again that 'Hockey (w) Roberts Trophy - Athlete of the Year display leads the side ' LUUAC ruled the 4x 100m. changeovers and come a photo-finish Laura Donaldson, Melissa Mercer, Joe SynanaLs - Cross Country The key to their success was the fluid into the C `ricket.0 third, although was a tight call between Eleanor Trafford, Emma Pledge Ashleigh Ball - Women's Hockey changeovers, which were meticulously World Cup final at them and Sheffield Hallam. The same •Korfball Saurav Ghosal - Men's Squash practised in training by Head Sprint the expense of a line-up of girls then took on the chal- Joni McKendr' Sarah Bowles - Women's Squash Coach Clem Bartley and, on the day. the highly rated Newton* lenge of the 4x400m against arch rivals •Mountaineering team once again produced the goods. Leeds Met though, sadly, were not Sean Jacobs Mike Brook - Contribution to Sport Zealand side. The Mighty Greens took overall sec- unable to keep up with their strong team. •Netball Dave Evans - Boat Next up was the men's event. After ond with 199 points, one place better Racharl Jarman Ma'. Bilhow - Canoe than last year with Leeds Met and seeing the girls' solid performances. and •Rugby League being the defending 4x-100m winners. Sheffield Hallam firm and thud, respec- Andy Hogg, Matt Taylor Chris Hatton Award (most improved the lads knew they had to rise to the chal- tively. •Rughy Union Intl individual) Watford lenge. However, the likes of the Met. Team Captain Leslie Addy collected I•lugh Mitchell. Andy Zan, Andy Matthew Gilman - American Football The FIN team to be who boasted Great Britain international the trophy, and said: "It was a beautiful Brainthwaite Harvey Clear- Boxing officially relegated day highlighted with some very impres- runners, would he in close contention, -Rugby Union Anthony Salmon - Cycling from the Preinictsliip - sive performances, and a superb effort Rick Yates, ranked ninth in Great Britain Laura Mackay. Frances Arthur Ben Weddell - Ultimate Frisbee have nov. lost 4 from all in the team. We now have to Senior Rankings for the 400m hurdles in •Sailing midfielder Damien 06, started well, driving the team into a take the momentum into BUSA Outdoor Claire Smith, Katy Sampson. Sarah Mike Brook (most improved team) Francis for siy months strong position. handing over to Team Championships where the Mighty Women's Basketha t Chadwick. Timothy Barnett due to damaged crueiate ligaments, Captain Leslie Addy who burned down Greens of LUUAC w ill he in force 'Skydiving Tenpin Bowling the track chasing down the small advan- Kathryn Ryhinski Women's Rugby Union *Snowrklers Skydiving Dylan Hartley Simon Laight. Lee Randle The Northampton • •Squash Cox-Stanley Plate (club committee of honker has been Phil Young. Sarah Bowles vearl handed a six-roonth •Swimming & Water Polo l'encing ban for eye gouging 0 Daniel Lee. Tim Fletcher. Rachael Dodd Hiking two separate players. Men's Hockey •Tennis alter a third case was Women's's Hockey Chris Wickets dropped. and his •Tennis Snowriders owl appeal looks unlikely Stephanie Sterwald to it .1 lli.t •Trampoline Deloitte Team of Year succeed, sounding guy. Nicki Forster. Helen Wilkinson, Vanessa Cheerleading Ellis Cycling •trltimale Frisbee Men's -Hockey Stephen Hendry Lucy O'Hara Murry. Ben Wedded Women's Rugby Union Nilaik In +antk ten Women's Squash •Volleyball hard to isle.- past Rebecca Coward, Minam Gernma King. rank OtItNidel 1AtVe- Kay Gilbert and. is yet. has not showed signs of adding III his ma . bulging trophy We need a new Sports Editor to join our team for next year cabinet at the Crueittle.

Newcastle Fans , If you're interested contact [email protected] leay.i r .51:7..*-4 ,11.1 17.'11 Rill NIP . .., (ill ■1...11 Student Sport Bad week ■.■ Runnng r ot LUUAC finish second in Carnegie Cup Competition

By Charlotte Gaynor and leaving the opposition in his wake. His per- the talents of the representative university Leslie Addy formance set the one for the rest of the athletes. and they were not disappointed. . day, with more and more wins being pro- Newcomer to the team Steve Parsons 4feed.i.„ amorweireug. duced. showed raw talent as he powered down the win/et a, The Mighty Greens of LUUAC competed Mary Ferrier won both the gruelling straight in a time of 10.7 seconds fur the in the annual Carnegie Cup contest this 3000m and, later on. the 1500m for Leeds. 100m. Heptathlete Lucie Shipley ran riot as LothETIon Hall Wednesday. pitting themselves against The day was largely about performances she competed in a series of events includ- t .. Leeds Met, Manchester. Sheffield Hallam. and versatility in events providing points ing the shot and javelin. Solid ilerformanc- 01.06.07 Edge Hill and Liverpool universities at the for the University. Rick Yates. Becea es by the team. especially the efforts of the LMU Beckett,: Park Carnegie Track. Flower. Amy Alard, Gary Bartlett and oth- women sprinters: Chloe Senn. Charlotte The team was opening its official out- ers all performed admirably in u number of Gaynor and Caroline Sellers meant that the door season in Leeds after recording some field events. recording personal bests. team were climbing into a good position. respectable indoor performances over the. Juror:. e-straordinaire Gabriel Akin The relays were keenly fought. with all winter. The glorious sunshine pros itled the showed an enduring display of power as he Learns out 10 grasp the precious double right conditions for good performances. ran between the high and triple jumps coin- points. Much was expected of the LUUAC and the athletes duly Uhl ieed. ing first and second respectively. His men's team as they had won the relay the The day started well for Leeds with an unique high-jump technique left competi- previous year and were not planning to emphatic win in the 3000in from talented tors and spectators alike in ass e. low it_ distance runner Adam (thee. who stormed Hie eagerly assailed sprints were • Continued on Pg 47 away from the field in a time of 8:54.7s. expel:led to pros ids a great spectacle due to

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Mk BURTON Leslie Addy collects the Trophy as LUUAC finish second on Wednesday ...ALL THINGS CONSIDERED

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