Page 4 Thursday, June 4, 1998 The Westfield Leader and THE TIMES of Scotch Plains – Fanwood A WATCHUNG COMMUNICATIONS, INC. PUBLICATION POPCORN™ The Westfield Leader Director Beatty’s Bulworth: Truth Be Told The Official Newspaper of the Town of Westfield and the County of Union — Established 1890 — By Michael S. Goldberger IMPECCABLE Member of the New Jersey Press Association • Member of the National Newspaper Association • One Popcorn, Poor • Two Popcorns, Fair • Three Popcorns, Good • Four Popcorns, Excellent Periodicals – Postage Paid at Westfield, New Jersey We work very diligently to assure that 3 & 1/2 popcorns final weekend, does a double-take. But the facts upon which our research is based Excerpt from a textbook, Recent the tough black crowd takes notice, are impeccable. We certainly do not want THE TIMES American History, circa 2076: “In the especially Halle Berry as Nina. The to sin on the side of doing peccable re- Official Newspaper of the Township of Scotch Plains and the Borough of Fanwood early years of the 21st century, a Senator’s rap-delivered jeremiad is ob- search. As you might have suspected, — Established 1959 — Bulworthian (i) movement embracing viously liberating. The rejuvenated peccable did, in fact, precede its suffixiated (sic) offspring. Periodicals – Postage Paid at Scotch Plains, New Jersey many of the ideals of the late 1960s Bulworth also notices Nina, the dan- once again gained momentum in gerous love interest. He embraces her, Join us as we travel back in time to the POSTMASTER: Send address changes to the offices of the newspapers at America, ultimately leading to most of as well as the ghetto. Latin word from which impeccable P. O. Box 250, Westfield, New Jersey 07091 the enlightened political reforms we After a wild night in a black after- stemmed, and on the way we shall tell you enjoy today.” — (i.) In general, any hours club, the next stop is a wealthy about two interesting, though derogatory, brave reformist philosophy or move- film producer’s manse. There, the born words. THE LEADER THE TIMES The source of peccable is the Latin P.O. Box 250 P. O. Box 368 ment. again liberal proves he is an equal From Bulworth, the title character in opportunity offender, no less forthcom- word peccare, meaning “to sin.” Impec- 50 Elm Street, Westfield, N.J. 07091 Scotch Plains, N.J. 07076 cable, while it is the negative of peccable, (908) 232-4407 • Fax: (908) 232-0473 (908) 232-4407 • Fax: (908) 232-0473 a highly controversial motion picture ing with wealthy Jews than he was with released just before the turn-of-the- poor blacks. He engages in insult, the is actually a very positive word and means E-mail: [email protected] century. painful kind that emanates from the “without a flaw.” Peccable produced two PUBLISHED EVERY THURSDAY BY WATCHUNG COMMUNICATIONS, INC. Having a fit of conscience, J. mouths of babes, and lets the stereo- naughty offsprings, namely: peccadillo, Billington Bulworth, Democratic Sena- types fall where they may. His hosts “a little sin”; and peccant (not to be Horace R. Corbin Gail S. Corbin tor from California, reacts to the sti- are abashed. confused with its homonym, pecan, a PUBLISHER GENERAL MANAGER fling “political correctness” of the era. But now, the same fickle press that variety of American nut), defined as vio- Suddenly, he cannot tell a lie and single- was ready to paint the ho-hum politi- lating “a rule or acceptable practice.” Paul J. Peyton Suzette F. Stalker Joanna B. Marsh handedly takes on the post World War cian as yesterday’s news, suddenly Make certain that you are not peccant MANAGING EDITOR ASSISTANT EDITOR MARKETING DIRECTOR II military-industrial complex which decides to jump aboard Bulworth’s in terms of your use of words by always has come to compromise American loony bandwagon. Seeing the possi- reading Take My Word For It. Karen M. Hinds democratic freedoms and perpetuate bilities confirmed by the media, the OFFICE MANAGER racism. Senator’s beleaguered top aide, Murphy Pardon the fantasy. But how many (splendidly played to worry wart per- Trip Out of Town Proves SUBSCRIPTION PRICE movies sharpen their daggers and fection by Oliver Platt), does an about THE WESTFIELD LEADER & THE TIMES plunge them directly into the very gut face and begins touting his boss’ new No Escape From the One-year subscription in county $20 of corruption that feeds them? Yep, persona. Monthly Bundle of Bills One-year subscription out-of-county $24 even the fat cats back at the film studio Concurrently, the Senator does some One-year college (September to May) $16 — the ones who sign the checks. Co- fancy footwork in attempting to avoid By Louis H. Clark writing the satirical epiphany with Jer- the efforts of a contract killer. It seems I hate doing bills. emy Pikser, Warren Beatty directs and that, among the handful of subtexts It’s not because I’m cheap. The kids say stars in one of the best political docu- that keep this fast-paced, superbly ed- it is, just because I won’t buy them indi- Welfare Recipients Will Get Second ments set to film in many a moon. ited film bubbling along, in his gloomi- vidual computers. I think I hate it because Given its mainstream movie origi- est hour the Senator had hired the hit- I am tied to a desk for two hours at a time. nation, Bulworth catches you off guard. man; in his own little variation of Iran- Luckily, my wife hates to do bills, too, Look Through Federal Grant Program Its reeling, take-no-prisoners indict- Contra, Bulworth arranged for $10 though she’s much better at it than I am. ment of the American sociopolitical million in life insurance in return for So we have made an arrangement. I do the While Westfield, Scotch Plains, Fanwood and beyond that of others. We all should pitch in and help; scene proves a scintillating outrage. his stance on a bill favoring the haves bills one month, she does them the next Mountainside do not face a large amount of welfare if not materially, then at least intellectually in our areas But while delivered with the jaunty over the have-nots. month. meter of a fast-paced farce, its revolu- But with meaning reintroduced into Of course, I am always accused of being recipients, these towns lie within the County of Union, of strength. We’re fortunate in our immediate region to tionary message is as serious as a heart his life, he’d now like to call off the out of town on purpose when the eighth a county which has the fifth highest welfare rolls in the have many good minds, talented people and a strong attack. killer. You know how that goes, but comes around. That’s the day we do all the state. Thus, reducing this figure will only enhance the infrastructure. We are giving and motivated to share In the opening scene, on the eve of watch for a twist. And a no cop-out bills at once. Anyone who comes in with the 1996 primaries, a severely disillu- ending that seals the movie’s profound a bill after that is out of luck until next regional economy. with others. sioned Senator Bulworth (Warren importance. month’s eighth. As part of national welfare reform, a program called Certainly, it is first necessary to help those on welfare Beatty) is about to come undone. He Warren Beatty, hip-hopping and rap- My wife accuses me of being out of Welfare-to-Work has been created. Out of this program get on their feet so that their everyday burdens are sobs as lackeys feed him the latest ping to a deliriously entertaining pitch, town on purpose. But as I point out, I don’t upbeat poll numbers. fashions a profoundly stylish outrage, get away with anything, because if she has come competitive grants in the amount of $184 alleviated. Then, they have some breathing room to be They don’t care that the political an outlandish, heroic icon who quickly does them when I’m supposed to, she million. Of this total, $5 million will be coming back here helped to grow on a permanent and continuing basis. pundits have labeled their man an old wins our empathy. Others who contrib- marks it on our calendar and I am stuck to Union County. When one considers that only 49 Secondly, they need self-esteem, a belief and desire to be liberal trying to pour himself into a ute substantially to his modern day with doing two months worth of bills. conservative bottle. That’s show biz. morality play include, Don Cheadle I also point out that she does all the grants, chosen from 600 applications, were issued by the self-reliant and contributory. Fear and doubt need to be As for the Senator himself, every pre- (Devil In A Blue Dress) in a fine turn as purchasing, so that she can understand Department of Labor, this is a significant achievement erased. They need to believe that they can continue to pared speech he reads sounds like the the main ghetto gangsta, Paul Sorvino what the bills are all about, but that’s by the county. grow and to achieve on their own as their lives progress. same disingenuous baloney (“Today, as big business incarnate, and Jack never got me anywhere. we embark on...blah, blah, blah, and Warden doing his Runyonesque right- My method of doing the bills is simple. The Department of Human Services staff submitted Creativity and ingenuity are required for the syner- more blah”). Bulworth can no longer hand man. First, I arrange all the bills according to the successful application which will create a program gism required so that our welfare initiatives are success- stand his own, well, his own bull. To None of this is to say that Mr. Beatty’s size — not the amount but the inches. The called Jobs Plus. The initial welfare reform was aimed ful. The county has many stand-alone programs with boot, his marriage is a sham. surrealistic fantasy is without fault. small ones are usually the most expen- Then comes the magic, the kind that Some mechanisms are clearly suspect sive, so they get out of the way fast. The at the easier-to-place individuals — persons who might lofty goals and difficult problems. Each program, set used to populate films in less cynical and merely plot expedient. But most of large ones are relatively inexpensive. have fallen on bad luck. The federal grants handed out aside, can succeed only on a limited basis. However times on a regular basis. Addressing it works, thanks in large part to fine After the agony is over with, I come last week go to the heart of the welfare problem by thought of in a master plan and coordinated, the achieve- the congregation of a church in South editing by Robert C. Jones and Billy downstairs with my calculator and say Central Los Angeles, the weary politi- Weber, an energized score by Ennio “Carol, we got you a private phone, but if addressing long-term recipients. ment level of many of the programs can soar. There is cian finally lets loose his overly-wound Morricone (punctuated throughout with you make any more long distance calls These people have a number of problems — sub- commonality. spool. Asked why he hasn’t helped the indigenous rap songs), and spirited cin- I’m going to have your call waiting thing stance abuse, poor education — which have prevented We have many regional initiatives and needs; for the black community in recent years, he ematography from Vittorio Storaro. taken out!” commits the unthinkable. That the audacious Bulworth, a fine, “Junior, how come you need $125 them from achieving any type of employment stability. arts, for a computer in every classroom, for pocket He tells the horrible truth. Indulging seriocomic example of the First Amend- sneakers? I’ll bet the Knicks don’t use Jobs Plus will include social workers who will go out parks, for community college and for economic devel- himself in a cathartic tirade, Senator ment in action, was even allowed to be those shoes and if they do they get them to the homes of clients and see what needs to be done both opment. Could “workfare” be arranged to build com- Bulworth informs the crowd that their made is astonishing in and of itself. for nothing.” failure to buy his favor is all there is to That some moviegoers may not avail “Lily,” I conclude, “there isn’t a doll from a health and a job skills standpoint. Wakefern, puters in the Westfield National Guard Armory? Could it. Thing is, his lessons in political themselves of its courageous postula- worth 50 bucks in the whole world.” whose owners operate ShopRite supermarkets, has this be done at a cost of $500 per computer rather than reality are articulated in the form of tions would be sadly unsurprising. The kids listen in silence. I always yell agreed to be a big part of the program by offering paying $1,500 to buy them for our schools? Could some rap tunes: i.e. – “One man, one vote. * * * * * when I’m doing the bills. They realize this Now, is that real? The name of the is my way of cooling off. of the manpower come from our County College system Bulworth, rated R, is a 20th Century training and jobs to some of the 500 persons who will be game is let’s make a deal.” Fox release directed by Warren Beatty “How is it you never bawl out Mom?,” included in the program. or as community service in our schools? Can we view His shocked staff is nonplused. The and stars Warren Beatty, Halle Berry Carol once asked when she was much In our view, most everyone knows that treating wel- this using some of the principles of private enterprise? C-Span crew, who will be following and Oliver Platt. Running time: 130 min- younger. She never forgot the answer. “I Bulworth throughout the campaign’s wouldn’t dare.” fare symptoms with tax dollars does not help an indi- Would this motivate businesses to relocate to Union utes. vidual in a lasting manner or truly elevate society. Of County? Could the graphic arts of county publications course, the county’s not trying to do that. The important be produced from the program? aim must be to impart vision, values and beliefs so that Let’s put our minds to work. Think and act outside of See More Time Is Here for Action a lasting good results. Training and education are only the “bubble.” Encourage each government and social some of the tools to the goal. dominion to join the master cause. Promote the “Risk of Letters on Many government programs have attempted this in Success” not the “Fear of Failure.” Let’s lead, not On Downtown Parking the past and few have succeeded. Perhaps the upcoming follow. Let’s not make welfare, “A Second Chance.” Page 5 by Councilman Neil F. Sullivan, Jr. Union County initiatives can find a way to succeed Let’s make it real. If anyone can do it, our region can. Editor’s Note: The following column, ate more long-term meters. submitted by Westfield Third Ward Coun- 5. Increase on-street meter rates to cilman Neil F. Sullivan, Jr., is being $0.50 per hour (12 minutes costs $0.10) HUNG UP!! published as an information source for from $0.25 per hour. our readers due to the importance of the 6. Increase Lot No. 3 (South Avenue Letters to the Editor downtown parking issue in Westfield. train station lot) to $90 per quarter. Mother-In-Law Seeks to Establish ***** 7. Possible long-range goal to design and build a parking deck Cellular Phones for Crossing Guards A Positive Rapport With Family After at least eight different studies and 8. Replace all parking and traffic signs many more well-intended efforts, it’s time in the central business district. By Milt Faith, Executive Director that we finally take action to improve our 9. Create a position of parking man- Poses No Cost to Westfield Taxpayers community’s use of its parking resources. Youth and Family Counseling Service ager. I would like to respond to Michael here, too. I have just reread the article Last month, the Transportation Park- 10. Create a parking committee com- Wolski’s Letter to the Editor (May 28), in which Gail Vernick informs our A frustrated mother-in-law writes: makes a person feel that there is something ing and Traffic Committee of the West- prised of Chief of Police, Town Engineer, wherein he stipulates misinformation community that the Federal Communi- My daughter-in-law is pregnant. My son wrong with him or her. If you don’t want to field Town Council, which I chair, began Chair of the Special Improvement Dis- as facts. cations Commission requires all wire- told me she needs rest and no aggravation. practice, that’s your choice; it doesn’t make holding public forums for the community trict Board, member of public at-large, a Mr. Wolski’s first piece of misinfor- less carriers to transmit any and all 911 He told me that his wife and I need to get you “bad” or “uncoordinated.” to learn about and give input on the work member of the downtown business com- mation pertains to his statement, “Af- calls, regardless of whether the cell along better (she feels I intrude too much) Your father has to calm down and real- of the most recent parking study (1995 by munity, a member of the Council’s Trans- ter questioning several guards, I real- telephone being used is connected to a and that unless I “clean up my act” I will not ize that he is making a nervous wreck out Westfield MainStreet and the RBA group) portation, Parking and Traffic Commit- ized that I wasn’t sure which ‘selected service. be welcome at their home when the baby is of you. Please show this column to your and the Council’s Transportation, Park- tee, and the parking manager. few’ had the phones.” She further informs us that because born. That’s a mean thing to do. My other parents. If I were talking to your dad, I ing and Traffic committee. 11. Transfer revenues from meter and Sergeant Carl V. Geis, Westfield of this regulation, an old cell tele- son agrees I barge in with lots of sugges- would tell him to knock it off, and to enjoy We need to act to ensure that we allo- permit parking fees and penalties to the Public Safety Officer, developed a pri- phone, with a battery charger, can be tions. I’ll do what I can to change; I don’t your youth by feeling good vibes about your cate our parking appropriately among the newly established entity to fund improve- oritized list identifying which guards donated for use by our crossing guards. want to lose my family. Any book available activities — in which you just want to have three major groups that use it — shoppers ments, including a parking deck. were in need of the cellular telephones No fees or charges are connected to to help me? fun. and others who transact business in our 12. Amend ordinance to clearly ban first. The criteria used by Sergeant this donation. Answer: It is possible that someone pressured downtown, “inbound” commuters; the “meter-feeding.” Geis to establish the order of this list To my way of thinking, Council- Yvette Strauss wrote a book on what to him when he was young. I am hoping he employees and business owners who drive 13. Remove meters that inhibit traffic dealt with the amount of traffic each woman Vernick is correct when she do and not to do. You will find it helpful. It will not repeat that pattern. These young to work in our downtown; and “outbound flow and/or restrict driver’s view of pe- guarded intersection carries. states that the use of cellular tele- is called “The Other Mother: How to be an years are the formative ones which help commuters,” who park their car in our destrians. Those intersections considered “cru- phones by our crossing guards can im- Almost Perfect Mother-In-Law.” Here is build one’s self-image. Dad, please read downtown to access the trains and busses The list continues with the 1997 rec- cial school crossings” receive the do- prove the quality of life for our chil- an example, from the book, of the seven this “answer” carefully. Good Luck! to other cities. ommendations of Council Transportation, nated telephones first, based on Ser- dren and our citizens. If a crossing deadly sins of mothers-in-law: A distraught sister writes: I assembled the list below of the major Parking and Traffic Committee regarding geant Geis’ list. Councilwoman Gail guard has the need to call 911, a quick • Meddling instead of minding your My mother recently died and left her points made in the 1995 Parking Report, fees for meters and permits for long-term S. Vernick has nothing to do with this response by our rescue squad and po- own business. $20,000 account to me. She left nothing for the proposed parking ordinance which lots are as follows: list. lice certainly is in the best interest of • Being overbearing instead of coop- my brother. She always thought that he was endorsed by the Transportation, Park- 14. Charge comparable rates ($40 per Mr. Wolski then offers the follow- our citizens, young and old. erative. made a good income and didn’t need the ing, and Traffic Committee, but was never month) in all long term lots in the business ing, “Then I received word that Ms. I appreciate all the math calculations • Talking instead of listening. money. She always thought women had it brought to the full council for a vote, and district, except for Watterson Street lot. Vernick was requesting that people Mr. Wolski did to come up with his • Harping instead of understanding. harder to earn a living. She felt I could use finally, some of my own ideas for moving 15. Establish discounts for semi-an- donate their old phone. This was her statement, “Wow! That is almost $5,000 • Expecting attention instead of meet- the money to modernize my house and help forward on this topic. nual and annual payments. way to improve the ‘quality of life’ in per year!” Mr. Wolski obviously missed ing your own needs. my son with college expenses. I am asking residents to let me know 16. Allow use of permit on more than Westfield.” the many articles which discussed the • Rejecting instead of accepting. The truth is that my husband owns his what they think. E-mail me at one vehicle. It seems Mr. Wolski missed the boat donation of analog telephones through • Spending money instead of giving of own business and does well financially. I [email protected] or fax me at (908) Additional ideas for consideration that the “Wireless at Work” Program. yourself. love my brother and we have always had a 233-3077 or write to the committee, c/o I have proposed include: Perhaps this will make it more clear A teen-ager writes: special relationship. I don’t want him to be Municipal Building, 425 East Broad 17. Establish means of providing park- for Mr. Wolski: This program is cost- My mother told me to write to you. My angry at me or feel Mother preferred me Street, Westfield, 07090. ing for downtown employees in unused ing Westfield taxpayers nothing! Not a father coaches my baseball team. I am 11 more. She loved us both very much. What At the Transportation, Parking and “outbound commuter” spots. single dime of our tax dollars is being years old and like to hit and pitch the ball. is the best approach to make my brother Traffic Committee public forums on park- 18. Establish “courtesy parking pro- used to finance this wonderful initia- I know I am not good, but I enjoy playing on feel better? What can I tell him? I don’t ing in the central business district held on gram” to provide grace period for over- tive. I as a parent would like to suggest the team. Whenever I don’t hit the ball, or want to jeopardize our relationship. May 7 and May 20 a summary of recom- time parking at short-term meters. to Mr. Wolski that he could service our whenever I walk someone when I’m pitch- Answer: mendations by the Westfield MainStreet 19. Address delivery of merchandise community much better if he dealt in ing, my father yells at me and says I could Tell him about your observations and Parking Task Force and The RBA Group and goods during business day by large facts and not misinformation. do better and I’m not doing well enough. concerns, and give him $10,000 as his (dated October 1995, presented to Town trucks. Based on the fact that Mrs. Vernick’s He says he is disappointed in me. share of the inheritance. Council January 1996) were presented. 20. Install centralized pay stations to initiative is costing our taxpayers noth- On the way home, he says I am “uncoor- A questioning reader writes: These included: replace meters in lots, especially long ing, his suggestion that our town could dinated” and if I want to be a good player, Why do people apologize for something 1. Establish one “centralized entity” term lots. save $20,000 simply by purchasing two- I should get up early on weekends and they did, but then repeat the same patterns to establish policy and implement all 21. Pilot “pay for use” in short-term way radios, hooked up directly to po- practice a lot. I’m too lazy. My dad makes of behavior? Doesn’t this mean that they parking functions. lot. lice headquarters, is ludicrous. me feel bad. What should I do? really don’t change their feelings? 2. Increase “effective supply” through 22. Pilot program with satellite lot with I thank God that Mr. Wolski is not a Answer: Answer: A “true” apology should indi- more efficient enforcement, promotion shuttle bus service to train station. member of the Town Council. Based You seem like a very nice young man. cate that the individual has accepted a and parking management. 23. Restripe lots Nos. 1 and 8 (and on his math calculations, Westfield Your father should realize that playing sense of responsibility for a behavior which 3. Curtail meter feeding at short-term consider combining) to increase number would be bankrupt all too quickly and baseball, like all sports for youngsters, was inappropriate, wrong, or harmful. If meters. of available spaces. the money he’s so happy to have in his should be for fun, for camaraderie, for the person recognizes his role, his future 4. Ensure convenient access for short- A final forum will be held tonight, pockets would be nonexistent. exercise, and for enabling family members behavior (and accompanying feelings) will term parking and also access to affordable Thursday, June 4, at 7:30 p.m. in the Joyce Goldstein to share in healthy activities. He should not change and not be repeated. If not, the alternate parking for downtown employ- Community Room of the Westfield Mu- Westfield call you names, because name-calling apology has no meaning. ees through reallocation of spaces to cre- nicipal Building.