If you’re reading this then you found one of the sharing links I posted from the time I started writing this story until the time I finished and found Neckbeardia’s video. I’m writing a sequel to this story but I am writing it much slower than when I wrote this story. I may end up posting my finished sequel in this document but I don’t know exactly when I’ll be finished with it. Or you’re on 4chan and I finally started the second thread with the new greentext.

If you prefer audio click the youtube link.

. https://youtu.be/TIgHy5qJ5dA ​

Fallout: A Different Point of View

>Be me >17 year old degenerate >Decide to say fuck homework I'll roleplay instead >Scroll through a fandom forum until I find a Fallout roleplay >New Vegas: Come One Come All! >Decide that this couldn't be too bad >Setting is that the platinum chip was destroyed and Caesar has yet to attack the dam >Cool.jpeg >I decide that maybe this is worth my while >look through character pages >There must have been fifty different BoS chapters because there were lone surviving paladins everywhere >If I hadn't scrolled down I wouldn't have cringed at the metric fuckton amount of NCR Rangers. >They are more numerous than stealth archers >Every so often I'd come across a raider or an edgy "gangster" from the Tops >Eventually I got to the better Character pages >Among them were a few traveling traders >Two Legionaries >A bunch of random civilians >And a very feisty Vault Dweller who HATED non-whites. Remember this guy I'll explain later >I see that no one has yet to make an Enclave character >dickerect.gif >Make the most original character I can, for a Fandom >Character is a thin, male, Robotics Engineer / Spy sent to gain support in the Mojave and find intel on the BoS and NCR. >Mods argue that "ughhhh cmon ughhh the ughh Enclave ughhh is ughh dead ughhh" >I should have stated that all these faggots are probably in Antifa's gay fanclub >GM thinks that I'll be a good addition to the roleplay so he allows it >Bad_Idea.png >They send me the special and skills sheet to fill out. >I take my time thinking about what I want. >Put my specials into intelligence and charisma. >Put my skills into Science, Repair, and Speech. >I see all the other filled out sheets. >All of these BoS edge lords put their specials into Strength and Charisma. >HOW MUCH STRONGER CAN YOU BE IF YOU ARE ALREADY IN POWER ARMOR? >Retarded.pip >All the edgy kids put their skills into sneak, speech, and UNARMED COMBAT. >Power_Armored_Ninja_Kids.bat >Among the edge there are a few of us who aren't absolute tards >But as unlikely as humanly possible, we are the misfits >I decide I'll start off in the northern part of the Mojave. >It’s a hot wasteland that is not hospitable to life. I mark this down because intel. >At this point I get a gift from the heavens >Everyone got something directly from the GM >while walking through the wasteland I come across a slightly damaged protectron >While it has some minor damage, most of its components are intact. >I find out that it is simply out of energy, after a perception check. >Using my science skills, and a roll of 16, I rig an energy pack for my plasma defender to be a battery for the protectron. >I insert it into the robot and and faster than the speed of light a mod says "You gotta roll to see if it works bro." >Fucking cucks. >Roll a 10. >The protectron comes online BUT only one of its arms work. >God dammit. >Proceed to perception check for the problem, don't have to roll because I'm a Robotics Engineer. >"You find that until you get a FUSION CORE, the robot won't be at peak efficiency." >Whatinthefuck.prototype >Decide to say fuck it and begin walking south. >Every so often mods will throw a ghoul or a coyote at me but in all they actually don't fuck with me, at this point >After a half a day’s travel I decide to stop and rest. That is until I'm woken up in the middle of the night by the groaning of a DEATHCLAW. >As soon as I wake up I roll for a perception check, critical success bitch >A young deathclaw has been injured by a big horner it was trying to kill >I make sure to put a sigh of relief into my post >I was about to shoot the Deathclaw and get it over with until I realized it hadn't been a mod that gave me this random encounter, it was the GM >I quickly go through the post again and find that the GM had kinda emphasized that the Deathclaw could not fight back >All other characters would have NO oc reason to not kill this thing. >But my character is apart of the Enclave >Guess which faction has successfully tamed Deathclaws >EvilGrinEngaged.com >I approach the deathclaw, which is laying on its back >Sneak Roll======4 >Fuck >Deathclaw sees me as soon as I move into its eyesight >Thankfully it doesn't make a move on me BUT it does bare its teeth and swipe in my direction. >I look at it and do a perception check on the wounds , 13 >From what I can tell the beast is not mortally wounded but I can't tell how deep the wound is or how long it has been wounded from where i am >The obvious thing to do is get closer right? >Nah fuck dat shit bro >I go back to my bag and start looking through it for a stimpack >I only had the one stimpack so I had to make sure this was worth it >I go back to the Deathclaw and its clawing at the longhorner >Stillpissed.webm >As a person with high intelligence I know that Deathclaws are very smart animals >I do not approach the beast but I make sure it can see the stimpack I have >I motion the stimpack as if I'd be sticking myself with it >Roll for an intelligence check on the Deathclaw >Fucking Critical Success >The creature stops baring its teeth at me and watches without emotion as I motion with the stimpack >I roll to see what happens if I approach it, roll a three >Deathclaw jumps up and almost charges me >Perception check on wounds >17 >Deathclaw falls over in pain >getfucked.gif >I stop approaching the Deathclaw and watch as it sprawls itself on the ground >It writhes in pain for awhile >This is my chance >Do a speed roll >13 >Get really close to the Deathclaw >Stab the stimpack into its back and let the fluids of faith flow >Get away as fast as possible >I do get a small slash on my calf as I run away but nothing to worry about >After a few seconds of the Deathclaw being confused and painless it stands up and looks at me >I roll to see if it attacks, runs away, or stays with me >Roll a 12 >Deathclaw runs off into the night >Wow that was cool, a good waste of a stimpack >I decide to go back to sleep >Walk past Egor, the Protectron, and lay down >Fucking deathclaw ruined my night and almost made me shit myself >At this point the mods are wondering what in the fuck the GM is doing, but it's clear that due to my character being the only "bad guy" I should get special shit >Cool >Everyone's gonna kill me

>Wake up the next morning and start hiking, walk past the carcass of the longhorner and get a foul stench in my nostrils >Get a closer look at the dead creature >Something had pissed on the longhorner, to mark its territory. >Very obvious that a Deathclaw was around somewhere. >Do a perception check, 15 >I see a few large footprints but nothing indicating that this wasn't from the night before or what direction the Deathclaw ran off to >I should make it clear now that this roleplay was quote "hardcore" >If you were killed, you were dead. There was no getting resurrected or saved by a miracle >Unless a doctor was on standby to see to a non-fatal wound. You're dead >So fuck that to staying in the wilderness >I made a roll to see if I could find any nearby roads and with success I found a highway to the south east. >And with that highway I found chem-crazed cock blockers. >This time it wasn't a random encounter, it was me walking into another player's random encounter. >In the distance I saw six Fiends standing around a single person, who I couldn't see from my position >Decide I'll get closer to see whats going down >Do a sneak roll >CRITICAL FUCKING FAIL >Egor trips on a rock and makes a loud crashing sound >God dammit you retard >While Egor is getting himself up I pull out my hunting rifle and take pot shots at the fiends that are now sprinting at me >I pop one in the chest before they get too close for long range weapons >Egor is up and shooting with his good hand >I whip out my plasma defender and blast a fiend in the face >gotsomegoo_onyourface.jpg >No more fiends coming from my direction >Turn around and see a fireaxe buried in what would be Egor's chest >Two Fiends are okay. >Two dead >One injured >One with the other player who is hostage. >Well fuck >I start shooting rapidly with my defender while trying to keep them far enough away from me >I'm able to injure one of the cunts before I fail an agility roll and trip on a rock >IamEgor.gif >I'm laying here trying to get up, until the fiend is standing over me with his big fucking fireaxe >"Are you ready to die you fucking cunt?" >Oh shit this is the end >Do an emergency roll and get a 13 >GM steps into the engagement, I see that he's typing >I should let you know now that the GM does all the player killing and so far 3 players have died. >Prepare to be split like firewood >Out of the darkness shall rise >A light that dwells >*Peter braces for the impact of the melee weapon when out of the silence of the wasteland emerges the blood curdling roar of an angry beast, one that sees one of its own in danger* >"What in the fuck!" >Out of fucking nowhere the Deathclaw I saved pummels the fiend and proceeds to TEAR HIM IN HALF BY HIS TORSO >Keep in mind Young Deathclaws are the same size as humans but still much stronger >Stimpackusedcorrectly.webm >I'm laying here on the ground, pissing myself while a deathclaw is murdering and biting chunks out of fiends. >All of the players at this point, except the non-edgelords, are getting madder than hell in the ooc chat >GM just says that "if you feed a dog today, it helps you hunt tomorrow." >GM is a real nigga >A few players stay mad but in reality it's just a young deathclaw, right?

>Back to the roleplay and I'm just flabbergasted by the current turn of events >After the Deathclaw gets done chowing down on fiends it approaches me >fuckbroyou'restillhungry.html >It stops in front of me and does a poking motion at its wound >No way >This thing isn't gonna kill me >THIS BASTARD REMEMBERS ME >Slowly stand up and back away from the Deathclaw >*The Deathclaw bows its head and slowly steps forward everytime you stepback* >Decide to do a tame check, wasn't even sure if I could >GM makes an automatic critical success out of it >I just got a Deathclaw as a pet. >"Easy boy, just stay calm alright?" >Stop looking at this big sexy beast and walk over to Egor >He's pretty fucked up but it is only wiring and hull damage, easy fix with my skills. >Remember about the hostage and turn to look over to where they were >Both the Fiend and the hostage are still there >I can tell who the hostage is now >Fucking vault suit >It's the racist vault dweller >My inner Nazi tells me to get my ass over there and help out >Start walking over and the fiend drops his baseball bat >"Hey man just keep that monster of yours all cool man, I'll be chill." >Look back and see the Deathclaw eying the Fiend carefully. >"I was looking for a new boss anyways man.We were only taking this guy hostage because he called me a nigger, we weren't gonna kill him man" >Watch as the Vault Dweller shakes loose of his constraints, picks up the bat and does a strength check >16 >Hits the fiend one time in the head and sends him to the ground >Continues beating him until he's dead >"Hi, I'm Conrad." >At this point people in the OOC chat are getting all mad that Conrad didn't die >No one except a few, including myself, liked his character >He was blonde haired blue eyed beast of a man that beat the hell out of people but was elegantly polite to whites and “honorary aryans” >Basically to people who didn’t look or act like nigs >Fucking based

>"So they had you captive for being a racist?" >"They had me captive because I offered to trade my pipboy for their nigger..... apparently it wasn't for sale." >My character laughs and so does Conrad, the Deathclaw cackles >We both realize the Deathclaw is still right behind me watching Conrad's every move >"So you have a pet..... dragon? Well it doesn't have wings... what is it?" >My character just looks puzzled and scratches his head. >"It's a called a Deathclaw and it kinda just likes me after I helped it last night. It's very smart so I guess it sees me as a… parent?" >"Cool, I'm just glad it's not any bigger or it might eat me! Haha." >"Yeah it's only a juvenile I think, my people used to raise them as front line assets." >Conrad just gives my character a look of total fear >"They get bigger?" >My character turns and looks at it >"Oh yeah, way bigger." >After we go back and forth for awhile I decide I'm gonna go and try to fix Egor >"Do you mind if I come with you? As you can tell, most people around these parts aren't friendly so.... yeah..." >Considering we were the two most hated people in the roleplay we kinda talked it out in the PMs how we should travel together >We spend a few hours fixing Egor and by the time he's up and running it's mid-day and the Sun is blazing >Me and Conrad are thirsty, Egor is retarded, and Richardson, the Deathclaw, is picking human leather out of his teeth. >After taking ten minutes IG to figure out which way is east and west we begin to head west up the road until we find a shack. >"Do you think anyone is in there?" >"Does it matter? We're gonna die out in this heat and Egor is too retarded to go get help." >Instead of doing the smart thing and knocking on the shack door, Conrad kicks it in and we send Egor. >Egor of course walks in and says in a monotone voice "All....Clear" >Conrad walks in first and absolutely loses his shit. "Dude look! A guns and bullets magazine!" >We spend a while looking through the shack. >A few beers, a bottle of liquor, and six nuka colas later we are sitting around like kings. >"Do you think there's a any food around here?" >Look around for food, perception check= fuck you no food. >"Nothing here but I got a few things in my backpack." >Conrad nods and walks over to my bag and starts going through it. >He does a search check and rolls a 17. >Not only does he find food but he also finds my Enclave uniform and armbands. >"You said your people tamed Deathclaws..." he pulls out an armband "Are these your people?" >My character is obviously rocked by the realization that this guy now knows that I'm an Enclave spy >I stand there for a second about to shit my pants when I realize that this guy is a Vault Dweller >He's got no idea what the Enclave is, I'll be fucking fine >"Yes, we're called the Enclave. We're the remnants of the United States government. I like you Conrad but you can't say anything to anyone. Factions have sprung up all across America that would kill me for what I am." >Conrad gives me a thousand yard stare and slowly slips the armband over his left arm. The white stars are as bright as Richardson is deadly. >"You saved my life Peter. I was taught as a young boy to love my country and it will love me. It's no coincidence that if you are the U.S. government, that you saved me. Maybe it was a message from god. I've always been patriotic, and in my hour of need America sends me a monster, a man, and a robot. I'm with you brother." >mfw we became a little more liked in the roleplay for all this brotherly love >mfw someone knocked on the shack door, scared the shit out of us, and Richardson woke up from his nap >Both of us panic IC and OOC >It wasn't a random encounter because neither a Mod or the GM made the post >See, GM posted the character sheets and unless you specifically read posts you dont know who’s who >So this person knocks on our door and we are panicking >I whisper to Conrad "Take off the god damn armband!" >Egor is retarded so this happens "Sir it seems someone is at the door." >We get ready to open the door when I realize Richardson is breathing heavily. >Perception check bitch >I put Richardson in the bedroom and tell him to "Please stay" >Commanding a Deathclaw was a no go >I walk over to the door and breath >I slowly grab the doorknob and realize it was kicked in, door is broken. >strength check >1 >fuck.gif >I do get the door open, but I also tear it off its hinges >Well shit at least we have that taken care of >Oh look an NCR Ranger fully kitted and staring at me through the iconic ranger gasmask. >"Is there a reason you're in my shack?" >Speech check >18 >"Oh this is your shack? We found the door almost off its hinges.... sorry about the door by the way." >"We?" >Before I could make a gesture to Conrad he pokes around the door and does his friendly greeting >"Hi I'm Conrad. How ya doin?" >The ranger pauses and pushes his way into the shack >"You should know that this is NCR property and breaking in is a federal crime." >Dude completely ignores the speech check I made >"Well see we didn't break in we-" >"Yeah yeah yeah... save it for the judge, deactivate that robot and get on the.." >At this time he does a perception check and gets a critical success.... >He sees Richardson peeking through the doorway at him >Panic.pipboy >Without even the slightest thought he draws his revolver and takes a shot at Richardson, misses >Conrad does a strength and accuracy check >15, 11 >Punches the Ranger in the neck and sends him to the ground. >Ranger shoots at Conrad, misses and hits me in gut >RICHARDSONRAGEMODE.EXE >Richardson goes full fucking beast mode and charges at the Ranger >I can't see the terror on his face, but with all his screaming I can visualize it >Right before Richardson can get to him I scream out to him >"Richardson stop!" >Surprisingly the GM doesn't do anything except say that Richardson stopped in his tracks snarling at the Ranger as he listened for an order of attack >Conrad looked at me confused >"What're you doing? He just fucking shot you! We have to kill him!" >"If we let Richardson kill him someone will be wondering why a Deathclaw would be in a fucking shack. Then they might see Richardson and know it was us. If me or you kill him we would have to hide the body and that'd take too long." >I paused to hold pressure on my wound >"We gotta get him somewhere where he won't be able to follow us and we won't get blamed if he dies." >After a few more minutes of minuscule delegating we tie the ranger up, disarm him, and take everything worthy of stealing >"Peter can you walk?" >fuckno.png >I end up using Egor as a walker but since he is retarded he walks like I'm not there >We walk out of the shack to find a dozen Legionaries and two Centurions >"Halt Profligates." >Fuckme.org

>My character is injured so all I can really do is tell Richardson to stay chill >At lightning speeds me and Conrad PM each other back and forth talking about what to do >ShitniggaIguesswe’llhalt.jpg >”We mean no harm to the servants of Caesar. We only wish to go in peace.” >inb4 metagame, my character was well versed in major factions >”And yet you’ve gotten yourself shot and have captured our prey. You bring a warbeast with you and yet you pronounce to only want peace.” >Of course we had to run into the ONLY two legion characters in the roleplay >Conrad decides to speak up and he does so with the utmost bullshittery >”This guy just attacked us out of nowhere, you don’t have to even worry about the Deathclaw. It’s a harmless beast and won’t harm anyone…. Unless someone attacks it.” >Fuck that’s cringey, but Conrad was really trying to bullshit us out of the situation >”Fine but you must relinquish the ranger to us, we have been hunting the degenerate for some time.” >Guy sends a few legionaries over to take the ranger away >IniatelightningspeedPMs.webm >I told Conrad to let them take the ranger, we already had his shit >”It is only appropriate that you are well compensated for capturing our prey, Caesar would insist.” >Me and Conrad weren’t gonna refuse payment for a faggot that tried killing Richardson >”We dare not use these forsaken technologies.” >The Centurion approaches me and hands me three stimpacks, which I later learned he had stolen from a NCR trooper squadron he slaughtered >”Also I humbly ask that you use this.” He hands me a single shot flare, yeah you know what’s happening.”If you are ever in need of help, servants of Caesar are willing to help enemies of the NCR.” >Me and Conrad are ecstatic in PMs >We just got the Legion on our side >The most hated people in this RP are now all pretty much watching each others’ backs >Couldn’t be more coincidental >I later learned that the Ranger was metagaming us and following us. >Legion bros were looking for a reason to meet us so the Ranger was stupid enough to do so

>After he gives me the stimpacks and the flare gun, he gives Conrad a purse of denari >ThisaintMountAndBlade.scroll >We watch them crucify the ranger, yes they did crucify the ranger and they insisted we stay to watch >A few mods pitched a bitch fit but the GM said that it would happen in the game and in real life, so douchedick lost his life and his character >I didn’t find out until later but because dickhead died he made a new character…. A BoS Knight >Yeah gay I know >We decide to spend the night in the shack, although in game we thought it was a bad idea to stay in the shack of the man we just sold to the legion >My wound isn’t terrible but it takes time for the stimpacks to really take effect >Douche Mod says I gotta use two of the stimpacks >One for the blood and infection >One for healing >Yeah fuck that guy >We end up only having one stimpack left, so we decide to save it >The next morning we get ready to leave and we HEAR the ranger outside mumbling >He’s still crucified, and the legion is gone >But instead of just dying he rolled for a strung out death >15, I think >He pretty much begged us to save him, that he could give us a good deal >Saying that we wouldn’t be executed for helping the legion >I’ll give the guy this much, in the end he actually did well at playing his character >Conrad gets a terribly beautiful idea

>Conrad whispers in my ear >”What’s a better way to suffer than to know his greatest enemy was just within his grasp, and he failed?” >See we knew this kid was edgy, and we knew this shit would make him engage in an edgy death >My character smiled and pulled black beret from his backpack. >”Look at this and tell me what you see.” >He did the cringy tired look up, like trembling and his eyes were half open >When his character figured out it was an Enclave Beret he apparently had some new found strength >”The Enclave… is back? That’s impossible! No!” >I laughed really hard IRL >”You wouldn’t think we’d come back after the shit we had to endure, but we are.” >Conrad at this point walks up to him and cuts one of his leg arteries to make sure he dies, no chance he could oust us >Conrad looked over at me and said “For the Enclave.” >Before you get all frisky with me, we did this to trigger the other players who were reading. >We knew they liked the story of a righteous “hero” hunting down bad guys like me and Conrad. >Fuck their concepts of good and bad, we’re the Enclave. | >After we decide to hit the road Conrad asks what the U.S. government is doing in New Vegas >I explained that in the past fifty years the Enclave has lost a lot of power throughout the U.S. >Factions like the NCR and Brotherhood were acidic and terroristic >On one hand you had the NCR who attempted to steal the rightful place of the Enclave >Then you had the BoS who would kill you and your family if you had tech they wanted >This seems like bullshit right, but unlike the edge masters of the roleplay Conrad was really doing well at roleplaying as a vault dweller, someone who didn’t know shit about the real world >We spend that day marching south, every so often a mod would through some rad scorpions at us but it was relatively quiet until we got to Camp Golf >We were a good ways from a perfect eyesight roll but Conrad got a good enough perception roll so that he could see figures in NCR armor and BoS armor >I didn’t know ic what was happening but I did go ahead and read some other posts >Apparently some BoS edgelords got together and thought they’d attack Camp Golf >I would think that this is good for them, getting out of their 1 man bunkers and all >BUT >They were having a monologue war with the NCR players >Literally just going back and forth about who was morally right or wrong >Edge kids were being edgy and we had a seat to the show >Here’s where it gets spicy

>One of the “ELITE RANGER SNIPERS” spots us hiding behind a broken car, a few hundred yards away >Doesn’t perception roll, doesn’t get out binoculars, doesn’t even use the scope of his rifle >Just yells out in the next post “HEY I SEE SOME PEOPLE OVER THERE!” >At this point I’m healed up to full health, Conrad is using the dead ranger’s rifle and pistol, Richardson is hungry, and Egor is retarded. >Me and Conrad are only equipped enough to take down MAYBE two players. >Richardson can probably kill someone in power armor before being killed himself >And Egor may be able to avoid friendly fire >We don’t stand a chance against 4 players, let alone a DOZEN BoS and NCR edgelords. >Speed roll >16 >One issue in this roll >We realize Egor is slow as fuck >Ohno.gif

>Thankfully the other players didn’t sprint at us but they began a steady walk towards us. We had maybe five minutes until they got to our location >We PM back and forth while the edge lords get their posts in >We have an idea to surpass the metal gear >Our turn to post and shit gets real | >I quickly take the higher functioning parts out of Egor so that he no longer has the function of walking or rotating >I TAKE OFF his nonworking arm and by the time I get done salvaging parts off him, at mach speeds, they’ve cut the distance between us in half. >”Hurry the fuck up Peter…. Should I start shooting at them?” >”No what the fuck, those Rangers are trained marksman.” >Roll for an action >Critical Success >After all is said and done I give some last words to Egor >”Love you little buddy. For the Enclave.”

>”For the En-Clave…..Sir” >Me, Conrad, and Richardson run as fast as our 16 speedroll will take us >Behind us we can hear the NCR AND BoS yelling for us to stop >Yeah sure, two groups of mortal enemies would tell us to stop instead of killing each other >We get away pretty quickly because of Egor’s sacrifice. >We hear him blasting his little laser up until we hear a shot ring out and end his little robotic life >Brings me to tears knowing that he sacrificed himself to save us >But his sacrifice was not in vain >You see, my character is a robotics engineer. I repaired, put together, modified, and Jury Rigged robots. >Egor would not go out as just a one armed Protectron >The corner kids didn’t roll very well for speed and when they did the GM said we were already too far away, especially since Egor slowed them down >If you’re reading this then you should know this is the intellectual property of grimthegreat >So after they killed Egor, or so they thought, they sticked around to see if we left anything behind >They didn’t find anything except for a few bolts I dropped while salvaging Egor and our footprints >They kept on talking about how that was weird of us to run away >One of the rules in the RolePlay was not to avoid RP unless you had a reason, they thought they were cute by throwing some shade at us >It wasn’t until Egor said “For the En-Clave.” that they all, in unison, shit their pants >What happens when an energy pack is overloaded? >Well you have something like a grenade, but you’d need shrapnel to do any REAL damage >Well guess what the energy pack was overloading inside of? >A protectron that was now rendered useless due to them shooting it >What happens to a military grade protectron when it is rendered useless? >It clears its memory and self destructs its CPU | >Guess who connected the CPU to the Overloaded Energy Pack >This guy >The energy pack, that I used as a battery for Egor, explodes after letting them know who his masters were >Lets just say the entirety of Egor’s body was shrapnel, and it FUCKED THEM UP >They all have to roll to see how hurt they are >Mods take sides >Most got off scot free >A few hurt >But 2 rolled a 19 and 20. >We just killed two heavily armed NCR troopers with a protectron bomb >Somebody was pissed >Somebody bitched to the mods >And Someone called the GM a Bias Bastard >That someone was banned from the RP

>We run for about an hour, slowing down into a jog every so often >In our panic we ran in a random direction >It wasn’t until I checked my pipboy, asked the GM where we had run off to, that I realized that we had run so far west that we were only a few miles south of the strip >We were tired, thirsty, and Richardson was hungry. >I’m pretty sure we spent about two hours just trying to regain our energy after running so much >After regaining enough energy to walk, we began marching to the west. >If we could get to the mountains and keep them on left or right, we could run and hide if shit got serious. >The trek would take a few days but since Egor had been killed and those corner kids chased us we had no other choice except to keep moving >It was nearing the end of the day when we started seeing smoke coming from a few miles west >In most situations I wouldn’t dare approach smoke, meaning raiders possibly, but I was sure if they were raiders we could deal with them. >Especially with a hungry Deathclaw on our side. >We get close to the smoke when we realize that it’s not raiders. >The smoke was coming from 5 different crucifications, all burning their captives. >It was our friends from the Legion >Out of fucking nowhere one of the Centurions pops up >”Good to see you friend, do you like what we’ve done with the degenerates?” >Apparently he had a 16 sneak roll, fucking sneaky bastard. | >We did a little small talk while the other Centurion and the NPC legionaries showed up >Conrad’s character didn’t know anything about the Legion but they didn’t attack us and I hadn’t mentioned them >”So what’d they do? Like are they just chem heads too?” >The Centurion gets kinda edgy and laughs maniacally >”These degenerates are scum that broke out of the NCR prison. They’ve been attacking traders, killing innocents, and obstructing our justice. This little farm they occupied belonged to the occupants they felt they needed to murder.” >Conrad was obviously pro-legion at this point >”So is this what you do? Go after murderers, thieves, and criminals?” >The Centurion gave a confused look at me, then back to Conrad. >”Yes and no. Our mission is to kill NCR scum wherever we find them, enslave or recruit whoever is willing to bow to Caesar, and well… yeah kill degenerates whenever possible.” >The Legion boys were not ready for Conrad’s take on being an ignorant vault dweller, but they liked it >The Centurion looks over our group and realizes one of us is missing. >”Where’s your robot?” >I look at Conrad then back at the Centurion >”We lost him this afternoon. NCR and BoS were chasing us, so I got him to slow them down while we got away.” >The Centurion nodded and looked over at the burning crucifictions >”While you lost a man, we gained one of our own.” >He motioned for someone dressed in a prison uniform to step forward. >”He was imprisoned with these degenerates and waited until the time was right to call us in for an ambush. He’s my blood brother, and we found him because of you four… three.” >Me and Conrad are the confused ones now as the Centurion goes on to explain what he meant.

>”You see, I thought he had died to NCR torturers long ago. Yet after you gave us the Ranger we found out that he had been stalking these degenerates, before chasing you. We of course take every opportunity to make examples out of people like this. When we got here and began watching them, I realized that he was my brother.” >This must have been what the GM gave them as a gift >Lol nope it was a player character >”We got him alone and told him we were here for him, and this morning we slaughtered the degenerates, as you can tell.” >We look the guy’s brother over and we can see that he’s no regular prisoner >He has scars and tattoos that’d you’d most likely see on a follower of Caesar >”Listen, we can’t take more men on into our cohort. We’re too large as is and well… I have an idea.” | >At this point I am yessing as loud as possible IRL, I know what's about to happen. >”I want my brother to go with you, he’d be safe with you three. Especially with that beast of yours around. He can hunt, navigate, and track for you. As long as you don’t treat him as you would a slave, he’ll be a good soldier for you as well. What do you say?” >”Well I think me and Conrad would be honored to bring on a follower of Caesar, if he can be discrete around our enemies, then I agree.” >Centurion’s brother is a new player who had joined the roleplay a few days after I did. >Guy’s backstory did not mirror mine in the slightest but he was a spy like me. >”I was captured for stealing food from an NCR camp, they had no idea that I am a follower of Caesar. They would have hanged me.” >”Then I guess we accept your gracious offer.” >Move in for a handshake >The Centurion does a forearm shake, this was a truly cringe moment. >After that it was just me and Conrad pilfering what the Powder Gangers had, which was a few pistols, a broken RCW, and fuck all amounts of ammo. >Remember that I haven’t even asked the legion guy what his name was. Decide to ask him. >”So what do they call you?” >”My name given to me by the legion is Augustus Vulpe.” >thisguyisgonnagetmekilled.gif

>We decided to spend the night at the farm, the one the Powder Gangers took over >becausefucktraveling.jpeg >While we’re all drinking and eating what the gang had Augustus pipes up about Richardson >”So how did you tame a beast such as that? Great things could be done if we had those in the Legion.” >Me and Conrad look at each other then back to Vulpe >”I guess you could say I have a knack for getting deadly monsters to like me.” >After a night of drinking, snoring, and Richardson tearing up carpet we set off east for a mile until we come across some farmers. >I have to roll to see if they’d run away from Richardson >Roll a 9 >Farmer pulls out a shotgun and approaches cautiously >”Why in the hell do you have a Deathclaw following you around?” >”Don’t worry he’s tame, how about you put the gun away. You’ll make him nervous.” >Speech check >16 >”Well if you say so, stranger. Why’re you coming around these parts? All we gots around here is mean bugs and mean thugs.” >kek.pipboy >”We’re just traveling for the moment, where’s the nearest town?” | >The farmer turns around and points at a set of buildings behind him. >”It aint much of a town yet but we’re setting up over at Bonnie Springs. If you take the road south, you’ll come across Good Springs. They have more there but the road is dangerous nowadays.” >whydoifeellikehe’sgonnagivemeaquest.gif >We go into Bonnie Springs to find a few burnt down buildings and four semi-livable buildings >They had a shop/clinic, a bar/hotel, a mayor’s office/sheriff’s office, and a vacant shop that had been recently ransacked. >Apparently they made and sold makeshift weapons, armor, and medical supplies. >Everyone in the town, a grand total of twenty NPCs, gave us dirty looks as we walked through. >Decide that we aren’t looking to get dragged into stupid town quests, so we go to the store first >I roll for my charisma check, 13. >Get a slight bonus on stuff I sell >Sell the shit the ranger had, the stuff we got from the dead Powder Gangers, and buy some supplies to fix the laser RCW. >Repair roll not needed because fuck the mods >”Hey do you guys exchange money? I have some legion coins I’d like to trade for caps.” >Store owner gives my the strangest look of all time. >”No sorry, I don’t think anyone would want to buy those. Me buying them from you would be useless.” >Mod doesn’t even let me do a speech roll >We leave and head over to the bar >As soon as we walk in the bar >”If you’re looking for your lady friend she’s gone. We think them Vipers she went after caught her, sorry but your friend is probably dead.” >”Uh we aren’t looking for a lady.” >”She said I’d know her friends when I saw em. She’s up there in one of them caves if you wanna go looking for her.” >We go back and forth until it’s clear that the Mod is dragging us into saving a player left behind by her IG friends. >Fuckme.com

>”How the fuck are we supposed to kill a bunch of raiders and save the girl without shooting her? Sounds like a Chivalry comic book.” - Conrad >Prepare for cringe >”We need not to kill the raiders my friend, we need only to get the girl.” >So after we were dragged into saving a player who had recently gotten herself captured, mods were white knights and she was a “real girl”, the mods were pretty much saying >”You better make sure this new player isn’t killed anon or we can make this game hard for you.” >wotdifficultyareweonnow.nuka >Basically we knew exactly where this bitch was, and we knew there was a small group of Vipers up there keeping her captive >She had come to this town expecting to get a few easy quests that would, in a IG week or two, would get her mediocre gear she could use to join the Enclave Lynch Mob >Took me absolutely way too long to find out which meme character it was we were looking for, but I found it, and my cringe was sustained to minimum levels >Character name was Alyssa Petals. I think she was either 25 or 31, couldn’t care less tbh. I hate reading other character sheets. >She wasn’t armed to the teeth like all the other dick bags in her general cringe group >She was a Scribe in the BoS, she was “searching the wasteland for forgotten but useful tech” c-c-c-c-cringe. >Apparently something very nice, reward wise, was promised to her if she could get rid of the bandits. >I thought it over and if White Knight mods are offering a good reward to a BoS, it must be energy weapons. >energygetsmehard.plasma >”Vulpe has a good point Conrad. Me and him MIGHT be able to sneak into the cave, get the girl out, then fuck off back to the town.” >Conrad wasn’t gonna be apart of this mission because he insisted we run in and absolutely slaughter them all >”Listen Conrad, me and you can take maybe six raiders in a head to head engagement.” >Pause to look at Richardson, picking his teeth. >”Ok we could take about ten, the three of us, but we have NO clue how many are up there. Augustus does stuff like this all the time. He says that we have a better chance of sneaking in and out than going head to head with them and finding the girl alive by the time we get back.” >I pulled a bitch move and speech checked Conrad, it worked

>”Is that the cave?” >”No.” >”Wait what the fuck, where is it then, we’ve been up here for like an hour trying to find it.” >”I think that may be the cave.” >Lets just say the initial cave was on the right >nothing in sight >only the darkness of the cave’s insides >My boy Vulpe pointed to my left >A big campfire and dozens of Viper raiders putting together a makeshift camp >So apparently I can’t see shit because when I rolled for a perception check on trying to count, I got a fat 7. >Thankfully Vulpe rolled a 17, yeah he had high base perception >In the camp they had set up, 42 vipers were visible. >I shit you not. >FORTY FUCKING TWO >I didn’t want to go look it up so I guessed that the GM didn’t like that the Mods were white knighting, so he decided to off the bitch >Fucking christ, overkill. >Vulpe looks at me and says >”Do you have anything darker?” >Think for a second about my uniform >All black >Edgy >Would absolutely be godly if an Enclave Super Spy broke into a raider camp, saved a BoS, and received a reward for pretty much stealth archering >My character goes through my backpack, pretty much a big ole son’bitch, and start pulling out my uniform >Beret, black military hiking boots, black cargos, light kevlar jacket, black gloves, and a compression shirt with a big fucking E on it dead center. >I feel like I’ve just broke the barrier into the cringe epicenter >But it feels good to be myself, an absolute unironic edgelord >”They told me that you were dangerous to our enemies, but I had no idea you belonged to the tribe even Caesar avoids.” >Pretty much saying,”I ain’t looking for in game character issues bro, lets fuck shit up.” >So with that we’re off to the cave. >Viper fags didn’t build a wall around their encampment, so sneaking in was an easy roll >Sneak roll, 10 >Plus 5 for dark clothes bitch >Get in with no one really seeing anything. >Vulpe decides to kill three raiders because, why not >Pew pew one through his make-shift pillow >Vulpe stabs two in the neck with a spear >Sneaking gave us +10 on attacks, all our rolls were high >Once we get in the cave we find ten more Vipers, dispersed so that we can not, without retarded high rolls, sneak past them >Fuck.jpeg >Retarded idea comes to mind >”What if we shoot one of our guns and draw them out of the cave?” >Looks at me like I’m retarded and PMs me to change my post >”What if we throw a grenade as hard as we can towards the other side of the camp? When it explodes we hide and wait for these guys to run by.” >Retarded idea but lets try anyways >Vulpe has a 6 base strength so he’s gonna throw it >Give him by only plasma grenade >FUCKING CRITICAL SUCCESS >*the grenade lands just at the make-shift camp’s edge* >Ka-fucking-boom >More goo on these Viper fags than on a asian chick during a bukkake >The guys in the cave bust out in a full sprint, don’t even fucking notice our giggling asses >After they’re all gone we hit up the mods with our speed rolls >14 and 17 >We be cruising at mach speeds through the caves, I’m taking the lead >Every so often we have to roll for a sneak, because a few fags are still here, but we keep getting mediocre rolls

>Finally get to the end of the cave system and we find a sacrificial BLOOD PIT >I shit you not >A mod took ten minutes explaining to us the most edgy thing I’ve yet to come by in this roleplay >*At the center of the bloody and gore covered room is a large natural hotspring that has been emptied of water. What it was replaced with was the blood of hundreds of men, women, and children. Almost too hot to touch, the blood pit was obviously cultic.* >Whatthefuck.pipboy >On one side of the room is a shitty shack made out of “bones” >Tied to the shack is the gagged and beaten BoS bitch >She’s knocked out right now, but she’ll be up and running in about five minutes >Do a perception roll >16 >I don’t really see anything other than the shack, the bitch, and the priest. >Wait >the priest? >*In the shack is sitting an armless, legless, tongueless, man beast that only serves to be a priest to the Vipers. He moves uncomfortably in his chair as you advance toward him.* >”Youth darth entwer the holwwwy plath?” >audible keks at this point >”Shall we kill him in the name of your Enclave, or for the Legion?” >At the word “Enclave” BoS bitch is awake and apparently trying to break out >We watch for a few turns as she keeps rolling but only receives -10 to her rolls, for being gagged, beaten, and chained. >”How about we just piss off the Vipers and drown their god, or whatever, IN THE BLOOD?” >Vulpe PMs me and says “Dude you’re such a fucking monster.” >Walk over to the weird paraplegic guy >Pick up the fucker >Walk over to the blood pit >Gently place him face down in the pit and pat his back gently until he stops struggling >”Well that’s done with. Untie the girl Vulpe, we better get outta here before the snake cunts decide to come check on no limbs the pirating priest.”

>Vulpe unties the chick and somehow she has newfound strength >”What fuck is the Enclave doing in the Mojave!?” >Too easy >”For one, saving your ass from rape and eventual sacrifice to the blood gods.” >Conrad PMs me “Fucking rekt” >We spend a few turns just arguing back and forth >Like all BoS cucks, this bitch has a precreated hate for the “Fascist Xenophobic Transphobic Enclave” >She obviously hasn’t read any of mine or Conrad’s posts >Doesn’t know that we’ve not been harassing innocent people or attacking the BoS/NCR >We’ve been running all over the wasteland trying to stay away from them >I should mention that although our in game actions were not bad or necessarily uncalled for, the mods and cucks that we killed absolutely assblasted our reputation in the OOC chat >There was a faggot mod who liked to play as chicks who knew me from another site, he leaked all my roleplays. >mfw I’m too fashy for regular goyim >”So what’s the plan on getting out of here? You know they have like an army, right?” >No shit bitch >”We snuck in on our own accord, we can sneak back out. Just don’t do anything stupid.” >We each roll for sneak, to see how well we could make an escape >BoS bitch rolled better than me and Vulpe >wot >Our rolls are high enough that only one Viper fucker sees us >Vulpe decapitates this guy with a spear throw, yes I shit you not >Critted him >Once we get to the entrance of the cave we can see that the Viper Tards are still trying to figure out why their friends got Bukkaked >Roll another sneak >BoS bitch fucking crit fails >Half the camp hears her trip on a tent spike or something >Well shit >Speed roll >We all get 15-19, because shit the roll gods didn’t forsake us >We nope right out of there in record time, but they know that we were there >That's no good because what if they come looking for us with a FUCKING ARMY >Welp time to nope all over the Mojave

>We get back to the Town and Conrad is being yelled at by some NPC because he got in a barfight and brutally beat a man and stole his money >I pmed him later and asked how much he got >Walk up to the NPC and speech check >19 >”Well I guess the guy your friend beat up was causing a lot of trouble anyways. Here, this is for not killing the guy.” >Gives Conrad 25 caps >Fuckingwot >”I see you got the girl back from the Vipers, any trouble?” >”They might have seen us but we out ran them by a mile before getting back to the town.” >We do a little idle chatter, tell Conrad about the blood pit >Disappointed that he didn’t get to see it but he’s glad we drowned some weird priest >had a good laugh while the BoS girl was brooding about being saved by an Enclave boi >Don’t worry I changed before returning to town >”I presume we should go talk to the bar owner, he’ll give us something for saving this girl, right?” >Correctamundo Vulpe >Walk in the bar and the GM steps in to play as the owner >”I see that you found your friend” >not our friend cunt >”Welp I bet the Mayor would be happy to thank you for saving her and getting rid of those Raiders.” >”Wait, we were supposed to get rid of them?” >”I thought that you’d catch that if your friend couldn’t do the job, you would have to.” >”First off we don’t know her, you kinda guilt tripped us into going and getting her.” >Bitch pops off >”I’m standing right here you know, I didn’t need help anyways.” >Everyone, even Richardson, gives this chick the stank eye >”Yeah…. So you thought we’d be going and killing an army of raiders? The four of us?” >”But there’s five of you.” >Guy points at the chick. >”She was about to become a wall decoration and a second story to the bone shack.” >”What?” >ohgoddammit.com >”Never mind that, we never signed on to go and kill all those fuckers. You asked us to get the girl, we got the girl.” >”I never implied you had to kill them…” >GM was trying to wave us off without a reward >”Stop changing the subject. We got the girl, what’re we getting for saving her?” >”How’d you even get the girl if you didn’t kill them?” >”We snuck in and out as best possible.” >I then fucking realized that the GM hadn’t read the posts about me and Vulpe going full tactical mode to get the bitch >Also realized that I should have dropped it and fucked off

>”Wait, you broke into the camp and stole the girl back? Did any of them see you?” >Here’s the kicker >”They saw the girl after she made a bunch of noise, but they didn’t follow us.” >”Are you fucking serious! They’re gonna think that we went and saved her. Are you fucking mad?” >”Relax, they didn’t follow us.” >”That doesn’t fucking matter, we’re the only settlement even minorly close to them. They’ll come straight here and slaughter us until they find the girl!” >And that’s how the cookie crumbles >”We can find a way to get them to go looking somewhere else. Maybe we could evacuate the town.” >”Oh that’s smart, send them to go kill different INNOCENT people!” >Owner pauses to sigh and rub his temple >”Go to the Mayor. We’re going to have to organize a militia or somethi-” >”We could call for the Brotherhood of Steel! They’d help!” >Bitch is so ignorant that she thinks the corner kids are gonna help anyone except themselves to a shitty monologue session >”I extremely doubt that the Brotherhood would have anything to do with a small town on the outskirts of the Mojave.” >Bitch tries to drop bombs on ole Peter >”And why in the fuck should the Enclave care? All you people do is kill and attack everyone!” >I should tell you that I’m 90% percent sure that this chick is, IRL, a fat sandwhale who loves Antifa, there were a few sympathizers among the edgelords >Bar Owner looks at me confused and Conrad is about to knock this bitch off her feet >Put my hand on Conrad, to keep him back from smacking this hoe >”Because unlike your,” paused to emphasize,” BROTHERHOOD. I, and the Enclave, take responsibility for our actions. >Your Brotherhood of Steel on the other hand take what you want and leave. Our goal is to rebuild the world and see to it that Humanity prospers. >Not horde technology and lie about how we got it. How many innocents did the Brotherhood let die so that they could get their hands on a simple laser pistol? >How about you do me a favor and fuck off. You’ll turn tail and run anyways, that’s all your Brotherhood does when backed up against a wall. >You have no sense of duty, only a sense of greed and self preservation.” >OOC chat explodes from the amount of butthurt this bitch got. The mods, obviously, backed her up >But the “bad” guys like my boy Conrad and the Legion bois just ignored it >Bitch doesn’t acknowledge the absolute roast I dropped on her, she just turns to the Owner and says. >”I’ll be back with who I can bring, we’ll deal with both the Vipers and the,” literally spats on my character,”the Enclave.” >Conrad rolls for strength >14 >Knocks bitch on her ass >Bitch stumbles to her feet and runs out the door

>”Are we fucked Peter?” >”I don’t know Conrad. There’s four of us. The sheriff and his deputy. Maybe a few of the townsfolk will help out.” >”Vulpe, go tell the mayor what’s happening, tell him to round up the townsfolk while we try to figure something out.” >After we drink a few waters and feed Richardson a steak we go out of the bar to find Vulpe, the Mayor, the Sheriff, his Deputy, and twenty scared shitless townsfolk. >”We’ll need to get the women and children to Goodsprings, everyone who can fight will stay. Maybe Goodsprings will send a few of their people to help out.” >We continue talking with the Mayor and Sheriff for awhile until we send Conrad to Goodsprings, he had the highest Agility >”Do you think we should call in my brother? He could have two cohorts here before nightfall.” >”That may be a good idea but that BoS bitch said she’s bringing friends, they’ll kill them all if they cross paths on the way here.” >”You have a good point, what do we do if these raiders over run us?” >”Kill your enemies until you fall, that’s the Enclave way. Retreat isn’t an option really, unless for tactical reasons. How does the Legion do it?” >”You shall fall upon your sword before refusing the opportunity to buy your farm.” >I smiled and looked at the town. >”We need to set up some sort of fortifications, we have to funnel them through the town center, Sheriff get your people to work while we find a good enough strategy to survive this.” >Me and Vulpe spend a few turns mapping out how we’ll distribute townsfolk to different buildings so they can shoot from relative safety. >Out of fucking nowhere the Mayor walks up and starts talking to us >”Daryl, the owner of the bar, told me what you said. Are you really with the Enclave?” >I eye the fatty for a few seconds before replying >”I am, is there a reason you’re asking or are you just confirming who you’ll be shooting in the back later?” >”Come with me, we need to talk.”

>The Mayor takes us to the ransacked store and walks around behind the counter. >”If the girl was able to get rid of those raiders we were gonna give her this, but now we will have to use them to survive. You have to promise that you’ll help us.” >Me and Vulpe look back and forth at one another confused >”We promise.” >The Mayor opens the cash register, takes out the cash bin and presses a hidden button >Behind him a false wall jostles open >The Mayor turns and opens the door completely revealing a terminal and the death it commands >I’m oh what the fucking at this point but the Mayor just walks over to the terminal >”We’ve known about this for a long time, but none of us know how to hack the terminal so that we can get anything working. They aren’t military grade but they’ll still be a big help if we can get them working.” >Walk over to the terminal and do an intelligence and science check >I have Intelligence 10 in my SPECIALs and Science in my skills >Critical Success >Get Fucked >”I’m in the console but it says there isn’t any real software…. It’d all be starting off retarded and near useless.. Unless..” >I pause and start going through my bag until I pull out a circuit board >I quickly pull off a few parts and set the board down >”What’re you doing?” >”I’ll use this memory drive to pretty much reformat all of these, making them useful.” >Stick the drive in the terminal and press a few buttons >Memory Processing………………… Memory Read………….. Memory Copying………..Memory Copied

>Fast forward a few hours and we’ve fortified the town >Its sunset and the women and children have been evacuated to Goodsprings >Conrad returned with some bitch, a dog, an old man with more explosives than an Enclave demolition team, and three farmers with shotguns. >All in all we had eighteen people, including Richardson and the Dog. >Me and Vulpe couldn’t really remember how many Vipers we killed but we were sure they still outnumbered us 2 to 1. >As the sun began to fade and darkness engulfed the land we saw torches coming down from the mountain >There more torches,people, than we remembered being in the camp. >Then again we killed a priest so I guess they might have gotten some friends rounded up. >We had the settlers deployed to seperate houses while me, Conrad, Vulpe, The Sheriff, the Deputy, and Richardson were all in a makeshift bunker. >We had filled bags with sand and piled them facing the funneled entrance of the town. >At either side we had tarps strung up, we made it seem like they were for hiding our fallback line if we had to retreat >There was at least fifty pissed off Vipers and they came straight down the road, up to the entrance of the town >One of them yelled out >”We want the girl and the ones that killed our boys!” >”The girl ran off!” >”What about the ones that killed our guys?” >Conrad just couldn’t help himself >”HOW ABOUT YOU DO ME A FAVOR AND FUCK RIGHT OFF!” >fucking vault dweller aryans >Guy doesn’t even turn around, just puts his hand out, another Viper faggot put a sword thing in his hand >I jump up so the guy can see me clearly, in my fancy Enclave uniform and beret >”If you come into this town, we’ll kill every last one of you.” >The guy laughs it off and keeps walking until he’s past the gateway of the funnel >”Yeah sure buddy. YOU AND WHAT ARMY?” >Too easy >I smiled at the guy and pressed a button on my pipboy. >On my left and right Vulpe and Conrad tore down the tarps revealing my army >”For the En-Clave.”

>12 Protectrons that had been programmed with Egor’s memories unloaded, in unison, a volley of laser fire that killed the Viper leader in an instant >Conrad yelled out as he unloaded with his RCW >”KILL THEM ALL!” >The Vipers started sprinting full speed into the gunfire and Richardson let out a beastly roar as he jumped into the frey, shrugging off any attempts at killing him as if they were nothing more than scratches >The windows on each building were broken as the settlers began unloading into the Viper army >Dumb bitch and her dog got themselves killed by trying to be a hero and ambush the Vipers >The Egors were more than enough to kill the Vipers, but by the time the smoke was lifted and blood stopped flowing >Only Seven Egors still stood >A few of the Vipers who surrendered had been lined up against a wall and shot >The Mayor left his building and ran up to me at crazy speeds for his fat bureaucratic ass >”Why’d you kill them?! We could have sold them to the NCR as prisoners!” >Initiate Edge Mode >”Because I told them if they entered this town that I’d kill every single one of them.” >I paused to squat down and pick up the Viper Leader’s sword >”Even if I wasn’t a man of my word. The Enclave doesn’t take prisoners.” >Conrad, Vulpe, and Richardson mosey on over to me after they’ve looted all the bodies for gear. >Or in Richardson’s case, got a belly full >”What’re we doing now Peter? The Vipers are dead, but that chick said she’ll bring the BoS with her. I do doubt they’d come to this town, but they’ll kill us all. God knows what they’d do to the settlers here.” >”We will have leave, tonight. She won’t be able to get back here with the Brotherhood unless they have a vertibird… if they had one we’d already be dead.” >I looked over my shoulder and saw all of the townspeople cheering as they ran into the arms of their brothers, fathers, and friends. >Feels moment >”What is it Peter?” >I turn back to Vulpe and Conrad >”A few years ago the Brotherhood marched with an army on our greatest stronghold. They blew up the base, slaughtered everyone inside, and didn’t let a single vertibird escape without a chase.” >I paused >”Not even the ones that only had women and children in them. They attacked us because we were going to give the greatest technology we had away to the people, freely. We were going to see to it that Washington could become a safe haven for Humanity and Humanity alone. Clean water that would be harmless to humans, but would mercifully kill ghouls and mutants in an instant. At least that’s what the story is. Some say that it was just gonna be a big fucking purifier.” >”Why’re you telling us this?” >My character wipes tears from his eyes >”I wonder what would have happened if we won. Would we embrace our brother in arms with love, or mourn for those who sacrificed their lives so that Humanity could be brought back from the brink.”

>That night, after everyone went to sleep, me, Conrad, Vulpe, Richardson, and the Egors began our journey away. >Before we left we were flanked by two of the settlers who had partaken in the defense of Bonnie Springs >Apparently the Vipers had attacked and killed the family of these two, before we arrived >Now that they were dead, the Vipers that is, they wanted to join us >Apparently the owner of the bar and the Mayor had a big fucking mouth and spouted off that we were the Enclave >Pretty much the reward for successfully defending the town was two Human NPC companions for our ragtag team of douchebags >We’d take all the help we could get, and at this point we were found out so hiding that I was apart of the Enclave was, most likely, not going to work for players >I pulled out my armbands and distributed them to Conrad, the two NPCs, and I looked at Vulpe >”What’re you waiting for?” >I hand him an armband and he slips it on his left arm. >I take my beret out of my pocket and fit it on my head >We were now repping Enclave colors in an unfriendly land >BoS and NCR were going to TRY and kill us wherever they could find us >First mission was to head south, get supplies, and actually build a moral fortification around the Enclave >I knew what I was doing, but those fucking edgelords didn’t have any idea why I would interact with NPCs >The GM got it though. >We headed south, by dawn we were walking through Goodsprings >Nice little town, home to about fifty+ people >They had heard about what we did for Bonnie Springs so, to the surprise of Vulpe, they offered us plenty of food, water, and ammunition >Enough so that even a group of dipshits like us could hold out against the edge lords

>After we left the safety of Goodsprings we were, once again, on the road >Mods knew that now they’d be able to hit us with some fat random encounters, but they’d have to go through the GM first >GM was an og >While walking down the road we start hearing gunshots from the south east, towards some sort of airfield >We decide to leave the Egors behind because, fuck they’re loud and still retarded >Each of us rolls for perception, we had a good view so approaching was needless >I rolled a 18, Conrad got a 3, and Vulpe got a 12 >What I could see was that some Powder Gangers ambushed and killed a bunch of legion soldiers, from what I could tell that had to be freshly trained because they all looked young and not well armed >I checked the posters and it wasn’t our Legion bros, just some Mods trying to bait us into doing stupid shit, ie get some of our companions killed >I have to emphasize to you how butthurt the mods were that we were growing in numbers, but I can only do it in a metaphor. >There asses were more hurt than a baboon's ass was red >I’m talking they were trying to SIEGE the GM and get him to kill off our companions >GM was not a retard >He knew that us “bad” guys were outnumbered player wise >I knew that if he saw me roleplaying as an anti-hero instead of a fully edgy gas the ghouls mutant war now type of villain >He’d throw me some bones and not let the edge lords, lefties, and NCR kids dogpile me >Mods on the other hand were taking the side of the “good” goys >GM made a deal with them >If they brought good random encounters to the table he’d allow them to throw whatever they had at us >It wasn’t until the Powder Gangers somehow saw us and started throwing dynamite that OOC shit hit the fan

>So the GM stopped the roleplay RIGHT then as I was about to roll for speed >He got so fucking pissed that the Mod metagamed that he BANNED him on the spot >The OOC erupted in fountain of shit to challenge Hawaii’s volcano Niggawoohoo >Other mods are threatening to stop helping when OUT OF NOWHERE he starts banning them too >Me, Conrad, and Vulpe are losing our shit in the pms >After about 2 hours OOC, the GM unbans everyone except the MOD who metagamed >GM @’s me in OOC >”I’ll be taking over your random encounter Anon” >Go back to IG >Rewind to us figuring out its a group of NPC Legion recruits >We shake off the ooc bullshit and roll for sneak >Vulpe rolls a critical success so all of us move in closer to the Powder Gangers >We’re in earshot now and we can hear them interrogating the recruits >”We know some legion boys attacked our guys at the farm, tell us where the fuck they are and I’ll tell Jarry not to rape any of you before we put dynamite in your ass.” >Recruits are young, like 15-18 young >Vulpes is gritting his teeth and Conrad’s trigger finger is itching >Jarry is a fat black guy >I turn and whisper to the boys >”What the fuck are we gonna do?” >Conrad doesn’t even wait to answer >”I say we fucking kill em all.” >I look to Vulpe, he shrugs then nods to me >I look to Richardson then point to the one farthest away from us >”Fuck him up Richardson.” >GM takes control of Richardson >*The young Deathclaw slowly nods and bares his teeth in what can only be described as a strange yet humble smile that would terrify anyone it was meant to kill* >MFW Richardson is Sapient

>I take out the ranger’s hunting rifle and aimed directly at Jarry >Literally can’t make this up >Conrad pushed my gun towards another guy and says >”I want the nigger.” >Okayguessyougotthedindo.vaulttec >Aim at the lead Powder Ganger and role for a head shot >Fucking Critical Success >Blow his brains all over the recruits while Richardson banzai charges past the Powder Gangers and rams the one farthest from us, the hardest shot to make >Conrad jumped from the shot and absolutely just starts unloading his RCW into the black guy >Vulpe takes this opportunity to throw a spear at one of the Powder Gangers, he misses >Our two NPC’s start taking pot shots at the last three guys who’ve began running away >”Richardson!” Big baby boy Richardson turns with a mouth full of guts. “Kill!” My character points at the three running Powder Gangers >moremeatformeatbeast.webm >Richardson breaks out into a sprint and me, Conrad, and Vulpe watch as he catches them one by one and takes chunks out of them >”Isn’t it weird that we let Richardson eat people? Isn’t that cannibalism?” >Conrad turns and gives him a serious look >”It’d be weird if he was human, Vulpe, a man’s gotta eat.” >After we call over the Egors and start going through the Powder Ganger’s shit we realize there’s still five tied up Legion recruits >lightbulb >”Vulpe, what should we do with these guys? You’re Legion, its your call.” >I hit him up with a fat PM >”None of them dared speak of our brothers in arm’s location so none of them should be executed. Yet they still allowed themselves to be captured, Caesar would see that they sullied his own name and needed to redeem themselves.” >”What do you have in mind?” - Conrad >”We must see to it that they do something that would honor Caesar, they will come with us and from now on shall wear the emblem of the Enclave. People have yet to see the Legion as anything more than monsters, the Enclave may pose as a hero to the downtrodden.” - Vulpe >One by one we uncut their ropes and I handed out armbands to them >”All of you, discard your armor and anything that could signify your service of Caesar.” - Vulpe >Here is where I got chills going down my spine >I started reading through the OOC chat and found something very entertaining

>”So why do you think they’ve just been traveling around like this. I thought the Enclave would be more hostile.” >”Not sure, but he’s been avoiding rp with us and just sticks with the racist and the legion guy.” >Skip ahead to after my character starts handing out arm bands to the legion teens >”What do you think he’s up to?” BoS Edge Lord >”He’s building an army.” The BoS scribe that ran off to find “help”. >I was scaring these fucking faggots, I had to be. >Because they had put aside their monologuing and started traveling together >NCR and BoS faggots broke character and began chasing down the “Evil Xenophobic Enclave Fascists” >Yeah I was building an army, and it wasn’t even done growing, not even fucking close >We finished getting the recruits ready for travel and decided to hit the road before the edgelords had time to pick up on our trail >From time to time a mod would throw a sneaky ant or radscorpion our way but with our “army” it didn’t even do the slightest damage to us. >As we traveled south on the road we came across a shitty little gas station inhabited by Jackals >They spotted us long before we spotted them, so they booked it up into the mountains where they had the advantage. >Vulpe eventually figured out where they had run off to and he didn’t like the spot we’d have to go to so we’d be able to get our hands on them >”They’ve put themselves on top of a trailer, one of them have a long range rifle. He can’t hit us from here but if we get close he’ll take pot shots at us.” >”What if we don’t get closer, what if we get further away?” >Vulpe is confused because Legion bro has no concept of strategy >”They ran off as soon as they saw us, there’s almost twenty of us now. Do you really think they’d remember every single Egor, all of the recruits? They spotted us and ran. Why don’t we act like we’re leaving. We could leave one of the Egors, two of the recruits and Conrad. They see us leaving and don’t think twice about coming down from their mountain.” >Conrad had been “taking a shit” while we kept going up the road, he had a thing for stopping to use it right before we got close to buildings. >Idk something about his character not liking how unhygienic they were. >Point is that he wasn’t spotted by the Jackals like the rest of us >”Sort of makes sense but what’re we gonna do when they come down from the mountain?” >”I’ll have the Egor transmit a message to me when the Jackals enter the station. Hide for as long as possible while we come back to ambush them.” >”What if we can’t hide?” >”Wing it or whatever, just don’t get shot.” >”Gotcha.”

>Conrad, one of the less fucked up Egors, and two of the Legion kids stayed in the gas station while the rest of us grouped together and made sure the Jackals saw us leaving >When we’re about a mile down the road I get a *ding* from my pipboy ​ ​ >”Alright that’s the signal, lets head back as fast as possi-” >Fucking more gunshots start popping off than fireworks on the fourth >”God dammit, we gotta move!” >Me, Vulpe, the farmers, and the recruits break out into a full sprint. >It was just a jog for Richardson >It took us 8 in game minutes to get to the gas station, and we were all fucking exhausted >We rounded the corner of the place and faced the gas pumps >The Egor we left got one of its legs chopped off and was trying to get on its feet >One of the recruits got stabbed in the gut, another had gotten knocked out >And Conrad? >Conrad was between two gas pumps kicking the ever living shit out of two Jackals, four more laying around him dead or nearly their >I watch in awe as Conrad ducks a haymaker, parries a jab, and upper cuts one guy so hard he back pedals for a few feet until he falls flat on his back >Conrad turns to the last guy and catches a wicked full strength punch to the jaw >Shrugs it off with a fucking GRIN, A GRIN >I go to approach and I just get met with a resounding >”Fuck off! He’s mine!” >shit nigga ok >The Jackal and Conrad circle for a few seconds until the Jackal lunges at Conrad >Ohshit.avi >Conrad lets the guy put his hands on his shoulders then, like a fucking ninja move, breaks the guys grip and uses all of his weight to double open palm punch this guy in the chest >Imagine a football guard or tackle hitting a tall lanky linebacker with purely his arm muscle and bodyweight >Guy falls straight down like a stick, gasping for air >Conrad straddles him and wraps his wide hands around the guy’s neck >I thought he was gonna choke him to death, nope >Conrad lifts up with his entire body and drops, putting all his weight in his hands >Breaks the Jackal’s windpipe and releases his grip >Conrad falls on his back taking in huge gulps of air >Obviously exhausted from fighting off a bunch of crazy chem heads with his BARE hands >I give Conrad a minute to rest while Vulpe tends to the recruit, he’s fine >”Conrad, what the fuck happened?” >”Winged it.” >Conrad closes his eyes and tries slowing down his breathing >MFW I brought the most dangerous man in the wasteland to a gunfight >MFW they brought guns to a fist fight >MFW he’s this timeline’s version of Chuck Norris

>After we gathered up the living Jackals we start offing them one by one until I get pmed by Conrad >”One of them is a new player.” >I check the post logs and it turns out that it wasn’t a mod with the Jackals after all >It was a new player who was playing as a Jackal, the fucking Jackal Sniper >Guy pretty much was using the gas station as an outpost to raid caravans and attack travelers >Decently edgy character page but the kid still tried fucking with us >We get to him eventually and he starts begging for his life >”Please don’t kill me I’ll do anything you want me to! I be your fucking slave just don’t kill me!” >Kid asks for a speech roll >pffft yeah sure faggot >He fucking rolls a CRITICAL SUCCESS >”Well I guess you’re too young to kill, but you’re still gonna pay fucking big time for fucking with us.” >Vulpe and Conrad and keking at me in the PMs >Basically the kid lost all of his NPC companions so he wanted join up with us for a while >Kid has no clue that we are the target of every edge lord in this roleplay >PM the kid and tell him this >Response is gold >”Either I get beaten to death by an aryan today or get shot by a Ranger tomorrow. I’ll take my chances.” >After we untie the kid and give him back his rifle we see to it that the recruit and the Egor are fixed up enough for travel >”So Conrad, what happened? As soon as the message went through we started hearing gunshots.” >Jackal kid pipes in, we just call him Jackal btw. >”He fucking started shooting us with his laser gun. When he ran out of ammo he rushed us with a big fucking hammer.” >”What the fuck Conrad, where’d you get a hammer?” >A long silence >”I found it in the garage.” >”Did you drop it or something, why would you fight a bunch of guys bare handed if you had a hammer?” >Jackal spouts off all pissy >”Because when he got to around his third swing he hit one of the pumps and broke it.” >Look around at the pumps >Conrad had been swinging a big sledge hammer at the guys >When he broke it he didn’t break the handle or simply knock the head loose >He SHATTERED the metal head of the sledge hammer >”How the fuck do you even do that Conrad?” >Long pause. >”Adrenaline?” >MFW Conrad is Thor

>After Jackal came on board we started talking a lot in PMs >Now that we were a group of 4 players, and I had been actively recruiting, people were ohfucking all over the ooc >If we were gonna plan out some strategies we couldn’t talk about it between our characters in game >The edgelords were obviously fine with metagaming and it made no difference to them whether or not we weren’t really bad guys >After a 2 IRL day deliberation we decided that if we could stand a chance against the Lynch Mob and their NPC compatriots we would have to call in the cavalry >We would have to call in the Enclave >We PMed the GM and he was fine with it if we reasonably found a way to communicate with the nearest Enclave base >For that we would have to find a radio station, commandeer it, and initiate a broadcast to the Enclave >It doesn’t sound too hard but there are only a few different radio stations in the Mojave >The most prominent being the one at the Strip >But that was a no go from the get go >There were enough NCR NPCs to fuck us back into our mom’s wombs >Also I was positive that a few BoS fags were up there monologuing with the Silver Rush NPCs >The only other high powered radio station in the Mojave was the Black Mountain Radio Station >Both Vulpe and Jackal confirmed that the station had been taken over by a group of Super Mutants >But Jackal told us about the trailer he and his fellow raiders had used at a emergency outpost >Apparently it had been some sort of weird ham radio setup made to listen in on and transmit messages at long distances >ufuckingwotm8.colaofthenukavariety >I decide to say fuck it and up head up there >”We called it Lone Wolf Radio, kinda has that weird aura to it.” >Conrad has no chill >”Were you high when you made up that stupid aura shit?”

>We hike up to the trailer and find a truly weird set up >Three high powered radio beacons, four ham radios, and more broken hand radios than time Richardson spends picking people out of his teeth >People are chewy >”What in the fuck were you chem heads doing up here?” >Jackal just rubs his neck >”You killed the guy who was up here didn’t you.” >Conrad doesn’t even wait to punch the shit out of the kid >At this point we began roleplaying that Jackal was just a lost kid who needed guidance, like an antisocial little brother you have to beat faggot out of >”This equipment is in really good condition but these beacons aren’t really for sending messages as much as they are for receiving long distance transmissions.” >Conrad steps forward and eyes the shit like he knows what it is. >”Maybe it belonged to a Chinese spy.” >Vulpe is just as confused as Conrad at this point because he’s outside seeing what he can do to make the generator explode, succeed he does not. >”I don’t think it was the Chinese Conrad, it was probably an NCR or Brotherhood of Steel listening post, I’ve seen a few before. Yet never with this much pristine shit.” >We go back and forth about how the BoS rarely had any sort of ability to face the NCR in open combat so they reverted to weak subversion tactics such as counter intelligence listening posts, such as this one. >Eventually I decide I’ll try seeing what i can do with the setup, see if I can get any type of long range signal out >Roll for Science >Should be easy >FUCKING CRITICAL FAIL

>After a few presses of buttons and taps on the PTT button the entire ham radio setup begins shorting out >Roll for speed >Roll a 16 >Disconnect the ham radios from the Radio Beacons >Inspect the ham radios, they’re all fucking ruined >Check the beacons >One is damaged but the other two are fine >”God fucking DAMMIT!” >Freak out for a few minutes, smash the hell out of the ham radios and even start shooting them >Eventually give them to the legion recruits so they can make spear heads out of the metal >”So what’re we gonna do now? I’m guessing we can’t use this stuff?” >”We would have to get some more ham radios, I see now why it all shorted out. The ham radios had such little room for the beacons’ relay power on their circuit boards that the person who set this up had to have more than one ham radio and countless shitty radios he could burn through, per broadcast or relay.” >We stand around talking shit about the shitty radio set up until it hits me that I don’t need a ham radio for the relay or broadcast. >I just needed something with enough processing power to make sure the output of the beacons wouldn’t overload the input of the radio. >By Enclave standards I would only need a few standards CPUs, by wasteland standards I would need a fucking gigantic super computer >Light Bulb >Sentry Bots had military grade CPUs, if I could find one or two of them I could use them to temporarily begin and end a broadcast before shorting them, and the radios, out >Of course this was all bullshit I was making up for the roleplay so I would have a reason to go down to Primm and use ED-E as the processing machine for the radio set up. >After all ED-Es were made for infiltration and propaganda. >Meaning they could receive and send radio signals of what they hear in the wasteland. >An Enclave made robot had more than enough processing power to do what I needed it to.

>”I’ve decided we need to head towards the nearest town and start looking for military grade circuit boards, they’ll have the hardware I need to process the beacons’ information without absolutely frying our equipment.” >My character pauses to look at Vulpe >”Where’s the nearest town that might have what we’re looking for?” >Vulpe walks over and starts looking over my pipboy’s map when he accidentally hits the volume on it’s radio >”Folks, let me put my newsman fedora here, because boy do I got a crazy story for you. I’ve gotten witness reports of Enclave soldiers in a little ole town called Bonnie Springs.” >The GM had stepped into our little navigation roleplay with a Mojave wide message about us, he was letting all the people know IC info so they wouldn’t be metagaming if they knew about us >”Apparently in the town’s greatest hour of need these soldiers fortified it, and fended off an army of… oooooh… Vipers. We’ve all heard stories about these guys folks.” >In character me and the boys are fuck yeahing at this point >Richardson is scratching his ass >”If you don’t know about the Enclave, they claim to be the last remnants of the United States government. >For a long time they kept to themselves and when they came out, they weren’t so friendly. >But folks you heard it from me first, and as surprised as I am, it seems what I was told is factual. >The Enclave IS for a fact, in the Mojave. Whether or not this was a single act of kindness or the Enclave has turned a new leaf has yet to be discovered. >If I hear anything, i’ll be telling you first, lets get back to the records. This next song is from me, to you.” >Well shit the whole Mojave knew we were here and knew where to start looking for us, now they didn’t have to metagame >”Peter they’re gonna start coming after us with everything they’ve got, an army, what’re we gonna do?” >”We will have to outsmart the bastards at every turn, and build an army of our own.” >I turned to the NPCs and pretty much did the whole “You’re the beginning of something great” speech. >In reality I knew most of them would die, if not all of them

>Staying in the mountains was a no a go if we were going to set up some sort of fortification, and at the moment we had no strategy of outplaying the Lynch Mob >So our goals went like this >Recruit wastelanders >Get somewhere with the enough walls to fend off a Lynch Mob attack, even for just a little while >Get the ED-E from Primm and activate the radio beacons >Get a message to the Enclave >It took a few hours to rig up the beacons on wheels, but once we did the Egors started pulling the two hundred pounds of equipment while we made our way down to Primm >When we arrived, a day later, we found that Primm was occupied by two groups >Outside the town was a platoon of disgruntled NCR troopers >In the town were a branch off group of Powder Gangers >All the fucking players in this roleplay neglected to do the first thing you’re supposed to do when you leave Goodsprings, fucking lazy faggots >Me, Conrad, and Jackal are going into Primm while we leave Vulpe with the troops and Richardson >We make our way down the road until we come across a few troopers on duty >”Where are you boys headed from?” >”Oh we just came south of Goodsprings.” >”You heard anything about them Enclave?” >nope.png >”Alright well if you hear anything, let us know.”

>The plan was to go and talk to the man in charge, persuade him into attacking the Powder Gangers in town >If the NCR guys died the Powder Gangers would be extremely weakened >If the Powder Gangers died the NCR would be extremely weakened >Sounds like a good deal right? >Shit did not go as planned >As soon as we got to the middle of the NCR camp we got surrounded by MPs >I’m thinking to myself that this is some fat mod bullshit >Then I realize something that I had forgotten >Through all of this Conrad has worn the same fucking bright blue Vault 14 Vault suit >fuck me >”Freeze Enclave scum!” >One of the MPs puts a baton in my face, obviously trying to intimidate me >Mods are within their rights, because this legitimately isn’t metagaming, but their plan is to trap us here and wait for the players to arrive and kill us >They didn’t really think it through too well >”Listen, we didn’t come here to start a fight, we just wan-” >Mods were not here to negotiate, they wanted blood for us shitting on their edgefest >MP in front of me takes a swing at my head with the baton >About to roll for a speed check when Conrad rolls for Speed and Strength check >He fucking Crits, BOTH >Catches the baton mid swing >MP’s face when he just picked a fight with Aryan Chuck Norris

>Conrad throws a lightning fast rightcross, MP is out cold >Me and Jackal roll our combat rolls. >16 and 12 >We won’t slow down Conrad, that’s all that matters >Before Conrad can turn to another MP he gets a glancing left jab that touches his cheek and slips past him >initiateoperationConrad.grognak >Conrad firmly grips the MP’s wrist with his left hand >Slams his right hand up under the MP’s armpit with a deadly iron grip >Lifts the MP in the air and with a loud *thud* slams him face first in the dirt ​ ​ >Jackal is getting his ass kicked by two guys >I’m dipping, dodging, and jabbing one guy >Conrad releases the MP he face planted >Hits a full out sprint towards Jackal >Jackal is pinned by one MP while the other is beating him with a baton >MP with the baton turns just in time to see Conrad’s huge muscular shoulders slam into his gut >The MP was gasping for air after getting speared, but Conrad jumped to his feet without hesitation and kicked him in the face >When he turned to Jackal, the MP that had him pinned was now standing up and staring at Conrad >”You want some big guy? I heard them stories about your racist ass.” >Mod made this MP a black guy >Too easy for Conrad >”Yeah and they’re all true. I’ll carpet my vault with your black skin.” >MP gets ready to attack when out of nowhere Jackal drop kicks the guy in the back >Conrad uses the kinetic energy of the guy moving forward to hit him with a full power hay maker >All that force going forward goes backward in an instant, MP ends up on his back >Conrad looks down at him >Eyes wide open and mouth gawking >Jackal wipes the blood off his face >”You killed him with a punch.” >I finally get done fighting my guy, he just eventually takes his beating >I walk over and put my hand on Conrad’s shoulder >”You fucking clotheslined him with your fist, that’s one for the holotapes.” >Did I mention that Jackal is pretty much the physical default version of a 120 lb soy boy? >Just has enough drugs in his system that make him feel pretty much nothing and puts the cartel to shame

>After we regained our strength after the fight we realized that were still in the NCR camp >It was a miracle that the troopers hadn’t rushed us >we attributed this to the soldiers being too busy watching Primm or making sure no one else entered the camp >”Getting out of their camp isn’t really an option, we’ll have to signal Vulpe that we need help then flank the soldiers wherever Vulpe begins his assault from.” >We drag the knocked out and dead MPs away from the middle of the camp and put them into a latrine ditch >yeah we did that >Conrad kicks the dead MP into the ditch then turns to me >”So how are we supposed to signal Vulpe?” >I put down my bag and start looking through it >Realize that I fucking left the flare gun with Vulpe >”I was about to say we could use the flare gun, but its not in my backpack. Do either of you have any ideas?” >Jackal does a little daydreaming while Conrad starts looking around for anything, then he gets a lightbulb >”What about my gun?” >”What about your gun?” >”Its a laser gun right, so if I shoot, you can see the laser fire. Right?” >”Conrad, do you really think Vulpe is going to see you shooting your gun? He’s probably making spears or hunting down coyotes.” >”I don’t think you get it Peter, Vulpe doesn’t have to see it. The NCR has to. When they see it they’ll all run back into the camp. Vulpe will see this and know that we’ve been ambushed.” >Best fucking idea Conrad has ever had >”That might just work we need to get into a defensible position, once they see you shooting they’ll go leth-” >Without a warning Conrad starts shooting into the air with his RCW >His finger never comes off the trigger >After he depleted the energy pack we start hearing yelling from all corners of the camp. >”Time to fucking run!” >Jackal hits a full sprint behind the tents, we follow in close pursuit until we see him climbing up into a destroyed building >”Conrad boost me up.” >Conrad pretty much throws me up to the second story >I turn around and pull him up >”Conrad why the fuck would you just start shooting without a warning?” >”Heat of the moment. Look it worked!”

>I look out one of the broken windows of the building to see Vulpe jogging down the road with everyone except the Egors following closely behind him >We look back at the latrine ditch to see all of the troopers going over the MPs we beat the shit out of >They started spreading out trying to look for us, some started to move back towards the front of the camp >”If they see Vulpe coming they’ll gun him down before he can even get close. We have to distract them.” >Jackal takes out his 9mm pistol and loads it >”Distract them or shoot at them.” >”At them? Fucking shoot them you little chem head.” >Conrad loads in another energy pack and aims at the guys approaching the entrance of the camp >”No. We should shoot who is closest to us. Vulpe will hit the ones closer to the entrance first, we don’t have to worry about them.” >Conrad nods to me then repositions to another window >I pull out my plasma defender and aim down at one of the men >”Kill the officers if you can spot them, we want them disorganized for as long as possible.” >One of the troopers sees Conrad’s RCW barrel poking out of the broken window >Before he can say anything he’s met with a dozen laser bolts to the chest and abdomen >Like horses being released on a track we begin shooting as fast as our fingers would pull the trigger, or in Conrad’s case as fast as the gun could go without overheating the transfusion chamber >Those who weren’t hit or killed in the initial first few seconds scattered and ran in random directions >The troopers walking to the entrance wheeled around on their heels and ran to cover when they realized what was happening >It didn’t take long for us to either shoot or scare the remaining troopers into cover >”How many are left?” >”I wasn’t counting I was just shooting.” >*bang* ​ >Jackal falls to the dusty floor of the building with a thud, writhing in pain >Conrad raises up and unloads into the tent where Jackal most likely got shot from >A faint scream of agony can be heard before going silent >I crouch and make my way to Jackal >Hit him in and out of his bicep >”Stop being a bitch and stop screaming, it's a flesh wound. Stop acting like you haven’t been shot before.” >Between cries of pain Jackal raises up and yells in my face “I haven't been shot before!” >Push him down and pull his grip off of me >”You’re still being a bitch.” >Before I can duck back into my spot a few shots whizz over my head >”Fuck me they’re really pissed, Conrad what’s the twenty on Vulpe?” >Conrad raises up for a second then ducks back down >”Look for yourself.” >I move into a corner of the building where i can’t be seen from my position by any troopers and barely peak the corner of Conrad’s window

>Vulpe had just passed the entrance of the camp >He went from his steady jog into a full out sprint faster than I’ve ever seen a man run before >Richardson is already past him and in a full banzai run at the first trooper in sight >As Vulpe closes in on a group of hiding troopers he, and the recruits, let out a bestial war cry >The troopers don't have enough time to turn around before Vulpe is already on top of them >Slashing with his machete and stabbing with his rusty barbed spear >”We have to make sure the guys over here,” I point at the troopers closest to the building,”don’t get any shots off on Vulpe.” >I look over at Jackal, who is writhing on the ground. >I do a perception check to see if he has anything useful on him >Roll an 11 >See a bottle of liquor in his pocket >Idea >Take his liquor, tear off a peace of his shirt because fuck him, then stuff it into the bottle >”Do you have a lighter?” >”He’s in shock! The troopers see Vulpe!” >Fuck me, time to wing it >”Shoot the fucking cloth on this thing.” >”What?” >”Shoot the god damn cloth!” >I put the cloth over Conrad’s RCW barrel >Three shots later it's on fire and spreading fast >Don’t even wait to see if anyone is looking at the windows, waiting for us to peak >Turn to the closest one and chuck the bottle down at the corner of the nearest tent as hard as I can

>As soon as the bottle smashes against ground it fucking explodes like a bomb >Half a dozen troopers run out from behind it, covered in fire >More are still behind the tent trying to put out the fire on them >That was no fucking regular liquor >I look back through Conrad’s window and see Vulpe decapitate a trooper who was trying to scramble to his feet >If the troopers aren’t dead they’re on fire, if they aren’t on fire they’re begging for their lives or so badly burned that they can’t fight back >Before Vulpe can cleave another trooper I stick my head out of Conrad’s window and call out to him >”Don’t kill anymore of them! We need to figure some shit out!” >Vulpe gives me a thumbs up then kicks the trooper he was about to cleave in the chest >After a few minutes Vulpe and the men are able to save a few of the burning troopers >We drag the still alive MPs out of the latrine ditch, and after checking all the tents we gather all of the still alive troopers against a wall of the destroyed building >Four MPs, beat to all hell >Three uninjured troopers who surrendered >Five hurt or burned troopers >What casualties did we have? >Jackal got shot and Richardson chipped a tooth

>We spend somewhere around an hour interrogating the soldiers >Apparently an order had been relayed all across the Mojave that NCR troopers were no longer to engage in hostilities with the BoS >Instead they were ordered to capture and hold anyone accused of being an Enclave agent or an Enclave Sympathizer >Literally if any player were to even mention us without a hateful tone, a mod would arrest them through NCR MPs and interrogate them >Mods thought that we were trying to persuade neutral players to join us through the PMs, because we didn’t say all of our plans in character >”If we can’t metagame you we’ll just attack everyone who may or may not be on your side!” >I shit you not, a few of the strip players and one or two of the traveling traders were ARRESTED for not shit talking us in game >They were winning over the people for us >After we got finished figuring out what was happening IC and OOC we tried deciding on what to do with the NCR prisoners >”You said it yourself Peter, the Enclave doesn’t take prisoners.” >My character was sitting in a chair deliberating on what we could do with them >Vulpe and Conrad were both advocating for their executions, and I wouldn’t want to do otherwise >But this was no time for destroying your enemies, this was a time for politics and messages >”I know you want them to die, I do too, but think about the message we could send to the Mojave if we play this out correctly.” >Conrad and Vulpe sit beside me to try and figure out my meaning >”The people of the Mojave have taken notice to our actions and are completely associating all of us with the Enclave. Even though among us there is only one true Enclave representative.” >I pause to draw a square in the dirt with Vulpe’s spear >I cut out a small rectangle where Bonnie Springs and Good Springs would be located >”If you don’t know by now I plan on killing every Powder Ganger in Primm so.” >I make a dotted line around where Primm would be >”This is our sphere of influence, they know or will know that we aren’t here to slaughter and destroy everything in our path. >Mr. New Vegas is a respectable and well known host, people heed his words with truth and seek him out for knowledge. >We’ve been mentioned once for our good deeds, especially the Enclave has been mentioned. >No doubt we’ve earned some goodwill with the populace, but we need to make the people look to us for protection. >Most of all we need to make people see us as Heroes. >Though I do believe we are heroes of a different caliber, years of lies and propaganda have filled even the deepest ears among the American population with bullshit and villainous fantasy. >Luckily the NCR and BoS have no clue as to how the true Americans won their power. >Outnumbered and afraid, they played to the enemies advantages without violence, but with politics. >We will nurse the prisoners to walking health, then we will send them to the Mojave Outpost.” >While Vulpe leaned back trying to take it all in, Conrad moved closer and whispered to me >”But why would we do that? It could end badly for anyone we send to escort the prisoners.” >I smiled and patted Conrad on the shoulder >”Thank you for not questioning me openly, it may have set an example of disobedience for the men.” >I stood to my feet and paced in front of my two companions >”No matter what happens, if we go through we my plan, we will win. >If our men aren’t attacked it will be seen as a metaphorical weakness on the NCR’s part. >We spared the lives of the NCR’s finest and returned them in the best condition we could. ​ ​ >Hah, we didn’t even torture them, so when they return they will speak of our deadly strategies and brisk operational efficiency. >I mean, who else could take an NCR camp without suffering a single fatal casualty?”

>Both Vulpe and Conrad were beginning to understand what I was going for >Vulpe decided to speak up >”What if they do attack our men, and kill them?” >I only smiled and turned to our ragtag soldiers who were rummaging through the NCR’s bags and supplies >”While it will be a sacrifice I do not wish to make, it will serve as a truth for the Mojave to behold. >We will have extended a hand of mercy, and possible peace to the NCR who so readily threatens and incarcerates anyone who doesn’t hate us. >Our hand will be bitten by the bear and we shall never extend a hand of mercy again, and no one will care if we slaughter a thousand surrendering NCR soldiers. >They will have openly refused our kindness, and attacked soldiers who came to parlay with a gift of goodwill.” >I paused to take in a breath of the warm evening air. >”What if they kill our men and mask it with the lie of us attacking first? NCR politicians aren’t afraid to lie.” >I smiled and turned to Vulpe. >”We’ll be sending your two youngest recruits, we’ll call them cadets. >We will see to it that they take twice as long as it should to arrive at the outpost. >They will be dressed in the most obvious uniforms possible. >I want to make sure that everyone they pass knows who they are and what they’re doing. >Say the NCR does say that our “cadets” attacked first. >How many potential witnesses would have seen just two young boys guarding injured NCR soldiers?” >”You’re too smart for your own good Peter, if you aren’t careful you’ll accidentally become President someday.” >The three of us laughed heartily, that night we ate, drank, and slept soundly. >For four months we had been on the run from the powers in this inhospitable wasteland, this was the most relaxing night in all that time. >And we slept a few feet away from dead bodies

>As dawn came we were already wide awake and brimming with energy >I had made it clear the night before that we were going to attack the Powder Gangers in Primm and kill them all. >Effectively we would win them over like Bonnie and Good Springs >The only issue is that we had twelve NCR prisoners to guard >Exactly how we would keep them from running away and staying at full operational efficiency I had yet to figure out >”What if we leave a few of your robots to guard them? Robots are extra trigger happy so it should keep them in check.” >I shook my head and stood to my feet >”Even the troopers don’t know the full strength of the Powder Gangers in this town, we will need to have all assets under our control for this operation to be successful. Hypothetically atleast.” >”What do you mean hypothetically?” >I fiddled with my pistol then turned to Vulpe >He was a semi-skilled strategist and always tried understanding the actions or tactics dictated by others >”You see if we have all of our assets at the ready, instead of being occupied, we have the full possibility of liquidating our tactics and reassessing the situation as the tides of battle dictate.” >Vulpe nods and sets down a bottle of water he was sipping at >I got an idea that most likely would work, but only if it was executed correctly >”We can however try to guess our enemy’s strengths and weaknesses. One thing we know about Powder Gangers is that they’ve been restricted to small arms and industrial grade explosives. I might have a strategy able to nullify both of their weapon groups, but we better fucking learn to huddle like penguins” >”What’re penguins?”

>”Are you sure this will work, your robots are pretty fucking stupid.” >I turn my head to Conrad and just smiled >We had lined up the Egors in a tight wedge formation >One leader and three on either side of him >Me, Jackal, Conrad, and the farmers were inside this open wedge >The plan was to leave two of the recruits with the prisoners >Vulpe would ambush the Powder Gangers from south with Richardson while we hit them from the west >I could easily repair any minor damage to the Egors but I couldn’t replace human lives >As we began moving, after we had already crossed the bridge, we heard the confused talking of the Powder Gangers >”Initiate propaganda protocol 34.” >The Egors begin broadcasting a recorded file off in unison >”We are the Enclave, stay in your homes. The threat will be neutralized momentarily. God Bless America.” >I turned to everyone with me and said “On the third time the audio loops, rise up and start shooting these fuckers.” >As the second loop came to an end the Egors started shooting at the Powder Gangers >They in return began shooting back, 9mm ricocheted off on the hull of the left most robot and one of the farmers almost pissed himself >”Calm it down, just wait.” >The third loop came near its end, and in the final syllable we all raised up and unleashed hell on the nearest of the Powder Gangers >One of the farmers blew one guy’s head off >A few seconds later and they were all dead >Jackal darted out from behind the protectrons and over towards a building’s corner >I only realized after he took the kill shot that there was a sniper on top of the hotel directly ahead of us >”Good shot kid but next time call the shit out so one of us don’t get shot.” >Jackal just nodded at me and got back with our wedge formation > I scanned around the streets, surveying the amount of dead bodies >I turn to my left and see Richardson in a dead sprint towards us, behind him is Vulpe and the recruits >I may have forgot to mention but it had been 4 months since I adopted Richardson >In that time he’s grown exceptionally larger >Before he was about my height >Now he stood two or three feet over me

>”Did you encounter any Powder Gangers from the south entrance.” >Vulpe didn’t reply to me, but turned his gaze to Richardson who was picking cloth out of his teeth >I nodded and patted Richardson’s belly >”Good boy, lets go get dessert.” >”Peter, what’s that supposed to mean?” >I turned to Conrad then pointed to the hotel >”There was a sniper on top of that building’s roof. Which means there are men inside making sure the sniper doesn’t get flanked. Lets go and pay them a visit.” >Just before I could start giving orders >Richardson snapped his neck to the left and began prowling towards a car hood propped up against a brick wall >Before anyone could say a word I shushed them and followed Richardson closely >Richardson was easily the most intelligent wild Deathclaw I had ever seen, god knows what he’d be capable of with a neural unit >Once we got close enough to the hood Richardson slipped his claws over the top of it and pulled it just enough towards him so that he could peer inside >He was met with a high pitched barking >whatthefuck.png >I tap Richardson and point for him to go away >I put my hand on the hood and pulled it away from the building >Sitting there staring at me was a little boy who wasn’t even ten and a young dog he was gripping tightly >”Are you alright son?” >I don’t know why I asked, he just kept staring at me >I turned to Conrad >”Find me some sweets or a soda or something, it's a kid.” >Conrad started going from person to person seeing if they had anything I could use to get the kid to come out >Eventually Jackal gives up a nuka cola, more correctly he got a gut punch and Conrad took the cola >He handed the soda to me and I looked back at the kid >”Are you thirsty?” >He nodded at me weakly >I showed him the cola and he lit up like a christmas tree >”Come on out so we can talk and it's all yours.”

>For a few seconds the kid didn’t move but he slowly began crawling out from behind the hood >Once he was out from behind the hood he put his dog down, who was had been leashed to his wrist with a thin rope >I squatted down, popped the cap off the Nuka Cola, and handed it to the boy >”So what's your name buddy?” >He started gulping down the pop but stopped and wiped his mouth of the sugary drink >”Bradley.” >I smiled at him and looked at him a tad confused. >”What’re you doing out here while all of these criminals are around Bradley?”\ >He stopped drinking again to answer me. >”I had to go get Sticks.” >I smiled and chuckled >”Is that the name of this little guy?” >He smiled back at me and did a quick nod >”You’re a brave little boy to go get your puppy, very responsible too. Where is everyone?” >He gulped down the last of the pop then set the bottle down on the concrete >He turned and pointed at the building across the street >”The Vikki and Vance casino huh? Are your parents in there?” >He nodded to me and wiped the sweat off his brow >”Well how about we go and see them? Would you like to do that?”\

>”Conrad take Bradley's puppy, I’ll carry him. Let’s go see how the people of Primm are fairing under NCR “protection”. >When we walked through the doors of the casino we were met with a blinding light and a dozen voices telling us all to put our hands up at once >We of course did not comply, we only waited for the people to notice Bradley >We heard the dropping of a rifle and watched as a man ran forward >I set the boy down and he ran into the man’s arms >A few seconds later a woman came and joined in the love fest >For a whole minute they were just loving and telling the boy how much they worried >Eventually they turned off the floodlights >The father looked up to thank us but only gasped at the realization that we were the Enclave they had heard so much about >Everyone else in casino realized it too >At this time Conrad put the dog down and it ran over to the family >The father stood up and approached me >He shook my hand and was about to start talking when one of the people behind him said loudly >”It's the Enclave!” >The father ignored the person and thanked me for saving his son >”Everyone, listen to me because I’ll only be saying it once. We ARE the Enclave. >Any rumors you heard about us being heartless murderers is a fiction beyond comprehension. >But the time for talking is not upon us. We know some of the Powder Gangers are in the hotel. >Stay back and let us do our job, we’ll deal with them quickly.”

>When I finished speaking to the citizens it was decided that a frontal attack on the hotel was a mad man’s suicide attempt >The remaining Powder Gangers knew we were here and may have even opened their windows to see us >Whether they were smart enough to cover all the entrances had yet to be seen >”Vulpe do you think you can do it?” >”There’s too many variables for me to give you a definite answer.” >Conrad and I give Vulpe the “Cut the shit” look >”If I can’t do it I’ll fucking start shooting people.” >I nod then look towards the front doors as Vulpe goes into a jog up the roller coaster ramp >”So what is the whole plan? I kinda understand that you’ll send Vulpe through an entrance they aren’t protecting but why not just have all of us go through the door up top?” >”Men in the Legion have been taught since they were old enough to understand words that they were never going to be at any real advantage. >Vulpe understands tactics and strategy at a beginner’s level, but he still understands. >He’s also very blood thirsty. >He’ll clear out the upstairs of the building silently and efficiently then cut a path to the front doors for us. >Unlike either of us he is silent and meticulous. Either of us could probably kill a dozen Powder Gangers. >But would we do it with enough silence to keep a cat sleeping, and check enough corners to keep a fallen house standing? >I think not.” >In the few months I knew Conrad I found out how dangerous he was, more so than anyone I had ever met. >Not because of how well he could fight, which I hadn’t yet tried finding out >But because how much he soaked up information >When I met Conrad he was an ignorant Vault Dweller who didn’t know east from west >Now? >A budding tactician and squad leader >His reflexes in firefights had gone from a adrenaline pumped frenzy to a slow breathing and calculating machine >Conrad had a very nice career ahead of him if I had anything say about it

>While we were waiting for Vulpe to clear the door for entry we had been talking about the size of the BoS >I was cut off mid sentence when gunshots rang out from inside the building >I couldn’t tell what floor what they were coming from, bad perception roll >But I soon found out that is was extremely close >We swung the doors open to find three men with their backs to us >They were obviously shooting at someone behind the counter ten meters in front of them >Conrad didn’t wait to start shooting or even try to knock them out >I shot one in the back of the head and he killed the other two with his RCW >We waited a second then called out to Vulpe >He jumped up and over the counter in an instant >”Everyone upstairs is dead but they’ve got a shit load of guys in the cafeteria. What’s the plan?” >I looked to Conrad and nodded for him to say something >”Strike them while they’re trying to fortify the room, they know we’re coming but if we’re fast enough we can kill them all in one fell swoop.” >Pretty much this meant “Lets fucking kill em all.” >We headed through the hotel in a sprint until Conrad ran past a doorway and people started unloading at him >”Talk about a late reaction.” >”So what’s the plan now? Just clear the room head first?” >”No, do you have a grenade?” >Conrad gives me a weird look. >”I wasn’t even serious… throw it to me.” >Conrad tosses me the grenade and I roll for an accuracy and speed check >Roll good on the speed, mediocre on the accuracy >I run past the doorway and toss the grenade in

>After the explosion the first one in was Richardson, more pissed off than a… well what’s more pissed off than a Deathclaw? >Next to follow was Conrad and the recruits >One of the recruits caught a shotgun blast to the chest >he didn’t make it but he put a spear through the guys neck before dropping dead right beside him >The room wasn’t as filled to the brim as we had once believed but they were ready for us by the time we had gotten to the room >It lasted only a few second but by the time it was cleared out six powder cucks were dead to our one >What really was strange was that we found a hostage in the kitchen >While the men were looting the bodies, and burning our dead, I went over to talk to him >”I didn’t know Powder Gangers took prisoners.” >”I guess I was just luckier than hell! Mind untying me?” >I took a few seconds to try and figure some shit out >”What’s your name?” >”Its Beagle, Deputy Beagle.” >I scoffed at him before replying >”How exactly did you get caught? Where’s the sheriff?” >”Well they ran up on me when I wasn’t paying attention. As for the sheriff they broke in his house and killed him and my sister.” >I paused to take Beagle’s gun, which hadn’t been taken away >”So you’re telling me that they killed your sister and your sister’s husband, who is also the sheriff. And you didn’t FORCE them to kill you?” >He looked at me confused for a second >”I wonder if your gun is still loaded.” >*Bang* ​

>”So why’d you shoot him?” >”He was either a traitor or a coward, both are very dangerous. What’d the Powder Gangers have?” >I pilfered through what the Powder Gangers had, absolute shit. >We took their guns and threw them into a duffle bag >Once we gathered everything worth a damn we piled all of the bodies in the middle of the room and set them ablaze >When we left we saw that the citizens of Primm were already peering out of the casino >”It’s done, you can all come out now.” >People burst out of the casino and began crowding us, asking us questions, all the while Richardson was trying to pull a leather backpack out from under a destroyed car >The same question kept the being repeated until eventually I decided to speak >”The NCR no longer occupies the camp outside the town, we commenced an attack on it late in the afternoon yesterday. Also, we have made prisoners out of the surviving NCR soldiers, they will be returned to the Mojave outpost, where they belong.” >I began pushing my way through the crowd until I was in front of them all. >”As of now Primm is under the protection of the Enclave, or as we are better known, The United States of America.” >I expected some mods to take over the NPCs and start yelling bullshit but just one of the mods was playing the NPCs >Mod was neutral and didn’t give af about the Lynch Mob >After Primm was secured we brought in the Radio Beacons and the Egors were deployed equally through the town, they served as a virtual alarm for hostiles >I went and talked to Nash, because he was the trader in town >Unsurprisingly I found ED-E sitting on one of his tables >nicebot.bat >We do a little talking back and forth and he’s about to make me pay for the robot >Speech roll >19 >”Well you did get them Powder Gangers out of town, and you are in charge now…. It's yours.” >get fucked >Conrad grabs the broken ass robot off the table and we walk out the door like we weren’t only in there to get the robot

>”Get the beacons on the highest points of the roller coaster, Conrad find a shit load of extension cords.” >We had moved all of our equipment to the Hotel and found that if we moved the beacons to high points within the maximum distance of their wireless broadcasting that we could almost double the power of their broadcasting and receiving >Don’t ask me how >I rolled a 18 in science >”Now we just need some power, does anyone know where we can get some generators and some fuel?” >I was outside the hotel so I was speaking allowed to everyone in earshot >Jackal walked up to my left and started going through his pockets >”I don’t know where any generators are but I had a bottle of gasoline for a chainsaw in one of my pockets.” >thefuckingmolotov.robco >”Don’t worry about that I’ll figure something else out.” >he fucking walks away confused to all hell >Eventually we settle on using a jury rigged wind turbine, we planned on powering the whole town for a morale boost >mfw it only could power the radio beacons at like 50% efficiency >Btw that wasn’t a bad science roll >It was just the GM being realistic saying we’d have to spend more time and money if wanted to give the town power. >At the end of the first day we had powered the beacons at the minimum efficiency and gotten the radio set up >One ham radio for voice input, three beacons for jury rigged broadcasting, and one still broken eyebot to process any and all information that would absolutely overload the ham radios >I rolled well on the repair so the eye bot was up and running pretty fast >I spent a few minutes going through its data, it was definitely an Enclave eyebot, a combat prototype at that >It was even better than I had recently presumed, it could take the full brunt force of the radio beacons and give us some really good intel on the NCR/BoS >The only downside was that the broadcasting power was only strong enough to get out into a five mile proximity >The current state of the beacon efficiency was part of the problem, but, they weren’t even made to broadcast anything

>We spent a few days doing random tasks that would entrench our foothold in Primm >We built another turbine ontop of the hotel, one ontop of the casino, and one for the residential area of Primm >We destroyed the western bridge to the NCR camp, after we ransacked it and brought the prisoners across >The Bison on top of the hotel was cut down and replaced with a flag pole and an Enclave flag >After we put up the flag we realized that Primm was not self sufficient, not in any great deal >The flag might in fact scare away any traders who could bring much needed supplies to Primm >”What if we start broadcasting on the radio? You said it is only good enough for short distance broadcasting, when a trader gets close they’ll hear the radio before they see the flag. If they know the town is open for business they might just ignore who owns it.” >Vulpe had picked up on it fast, he understood what it meant for people to hate him without even understanding his politics. >”That might work, but we need a good message to send out. We can’t just say “Come all traders, we need your shit!” That’d make it seem that we are going through a time of attrition.” >Conrad walked over to me from his position and began fiddling with his pipboy >”The radius of the beacons are low, sure, but this one isn’t.” >He flipped on New Vegas Radio >”If he says on the radio that we took Primm from both the NCR and the Powder Gangers, people will know that it’s safe. Good thinking Conrad, but the only issue is, how do we get him to tell everyone in the Mojave?” >We was silent, but he turned his gaze to the two youngest recruits >”We already decided that it was a sacrifice worth making. Say if something bad doesn’t happen to them, we can just broadcast on our radio until Mr. New Vegas is informed of what happened.” >I didn’t respond to Conrad I just turned to Vulpe and nodded

>We sent the recruits that day, we gave them laser rifles and a few energy packs. If they did die, they’d take a few down with them >Their orders were to take at least four days to make the trek to the Mojave outpost, it only took two >Make sure people saw them, and often say that they were apart of the Enclave >If people asked what they were doing they’d say,”After the Captain won a decisive victory over the Powder Gangers and NCR at Primm we were ordered to put the prisoners back into the custody of the NCR. >Four days after we sent the recruits out we got word from traders they had seen a few of our men transporting prisoners on the road >We confirmed that is was our men and when they moved on they carried word of our troops wherever they went >Eventually when the recruits didn’t return, we assumed the worst until Mr. New Vegas came on the radio and started talking about us again >”How’re ya doin out there New Vegas? I got some more news for you here, let me get my newsman fedora. >A while ago I told you that Enclave troops were spotted in Bonnie Springs, fighting off an army of snake Vipers, or so it goes. >Well, they’ve been spotted again in Primm. Eyewitnesses report that Enclave forces ambushed the NCR camp outside the town a took it within minutes. >The next day, the town had its entire population of Powder Gangers cleared out by the Enclave. >If you go by the town you’ll see an Enclave flag flying high over the Bison Steve hotel. >But that’s not all folks.

>Traders coming from the Mojave Outpost say that young Enclave soldiers were transporting a group of NCR prisoners to the outpost. >After the soldiers released the troopers, the NCR opened fire on them. >I have contesting reports saying the two young men were shot to death and another report saying they successfully got away. >I think I can speak for everyone listening when I say I hope those young men are okay, seeing that they were on a humanitarian mission and all. >One of the NCR rangers here on the strip had this to say about the report. >“I don’t care if they’re little girls or boys who haven’t even gotten hair on their chest. If you wear an E, I will shoot you on sight. There’s no mercy for the Enclave scum.” >I’ve gotta say I don’t think the Enclave feels all the same about mercy here people, but I do know that the NCR sure don’t like em. >Let's get back to some tunes.” >MFW a real player said that in game to one of the Securitrons >MFW Mr. New Vegas put that on the radio >MFW The salt coming from the NCR is enough to make slugs go extinct

>Over the course of two in game weeks we attract traders into Primm >Using the traders as prospectors and gatherers we add another protectron and a Sentry Bot to our machine ranks >We designated the Sentry Bot as Egor 2.0 >He’s much more intimidating than the Protectron Egors, but has just as much personality >We knew that at times we wouldn’t be able to protect Primm, our main force might be absent >So we decided to put a man up for sheriff, after the people accepted him he deputized his two brothers. >Effectively they kept people in check while we were busy sending out patrols and scavenging for needed supplies >It wasn’t until the Deputy from Bonnie Springs came with terrible news did we know that shit had officially hit the fan >Apparently when the BoS and NCR got to the little town they didn’t take a liking to the people who very openly supported us >They interrogated the Sheriff and the Mayor, when neither told them anything, they didn’t know anything, they executed them for treason >uwotm8 >theyaren’tevencitizens.iso >Apparently none of the edgy players understood anything about the political game I had been playing >All of Bonnie Springs took up arms against them, killing 4 players and 2 NPCs >In return the players killed EVERYONE in the town, though they didn’t target children they shot anyone they saw fighting, running, or otherwise >One of the Ranger Edgelords had a post detailing his sniping of two farmers trying to run to Goodsprings >i shit you not >They just massacred an entire town because “Eww Enclave Supporters” >”We should get the deputy to the Strip! If we can get him on the radio, New Vegas will turn against the NCR and BoS!” >”God dammit, no!” >I shook my head kicked a stool >Strength roll of 13 >Kicked it a few feet away >”There’s no way we’d be able to get him there. Without us he might get there but as soon as he opens his mouth the NCR will silence him or Mr. New Vegas, permanently.” >The deputy had broken down once he had gotten to us, it was truly a sad sight to see him in such a condition >”Vulpe, send your fastest man to Goodsprings, tell them we believe they are next on the enemy’s hitlist. We want them to evacuate to Primm immediately. I want you to see to it personally that every single trader that comes through Primm hears about what happened to Bonnie Springs. Also, I’ll be taking Conrad and Richardson with me on a mission. I need you to see to it that in my absence that every man in Primm has a gun in his hands and knows how to use it. The NCR and BoS are going to be coming for us and after I do what I do, they’ll be extra fucking pissed.”

>Me, Conrad, and Richardson set off that night at a light jogging pace >We were working against time and it had a bone to pick with us >A few hours before sunrise we met Vulpe’s man on the road, almost all of Goodsprings was with him. >Apparently the main force of the Lynch Mob would hit Goodsprings by dawn >We couldn’t stay on the road anymore and risk running into the NCR or BoS >Even with Richardson we would be easy prey to all that plot armor >Getting off the road be began heading north at paces to surpass the metal gear >But really we went at lightning speeds in comparison to before we had the Egors >We made a like, week trip in one night. >We were south of Sloan when we had a GM random encounter >This encounter was meant to do one of two things >Give us something we need, or give us information we want >The Random Encounter was one all to familiar to myself >A fucking Deathclaw >A Deathclaw burst out from its den and began roaring at us >I did a perception check right away >Maybe I’d get a friend for Richardson >Nope >This guy was gravely injured >Bullet wounds and laser burnt flesh covered him >He was of course was on the brink of death >And there was no stopping the end for this big beauty >One thing I did notice though, that didn’t involve its imminent death, was its immense size >It was obviously older than Richardson >It was at least a meter taller and its arms were longer >It was hands down the biggest Deathclaw I had ever seen >One thing Richardson had going for him is that he was much faster and had more muscle mass >You see Wild Deathclaws ate anything they could find >While it often consisted of Longhorners, brahmin, or coyotes. >The greatest delicacy for any carnivorous animal is Human meat >Plenty of fat, plenty of muscle, and plenty of bone marrow >The wild Deathclaw may have eaten a dozen Humans in its life >Richardson? >Double that within a month >That’s not including the countless amounts of meat we can’t eat that we gave to him

>Richardson had been lagging behind for some time, he spotted a carcass and went to check it out >After realizing another Deathclaw had killed the animal, it wasn’t recognizable, he ran back to us >The big mother fucker was about to charge us when Richardson got between us >It was clear that Richardson was facing off against an Alpha Male >My character knew that non-Alpha Deathclaws wouldn’t dare face an Alpha unless mating was on the line >In Pack VS Pack fights the two Alphas would fight >Either Richardson thought he was the Alpha or he was defying all of his natural programming >because as soon as the Alpha reared up to try and intimidate Richardson >which is what Alphas do >Richardson initiated the attack without a second glance >The first few seconds were lightning speed slashes and punches >I could tell from what Richardson was doing, staying low and swinging low, that he wasn’t trying to kill the Alpha outright >He was measuring up how much of a threat the Alpha was >Richardson pulled away in an instant and circled the battered Alpha >It was strong, Richardson had allowed the Alpha to hit him a few times on his neck and lower back, where his scales were thickest >Richardson had done some damage of his own but purposely nothing serious, just cut and slashed at the Alpha’s legs >A few seconds of circling later and Conrad raises his RCW to start shooting >”No, if we do the beast will charge us and kill us. Richardson can take him down.”

>Richardson stopped in his circling and slashed the ground in front of him >Putting huge holes in the Earth >One thing you watch out for in the wild are holes like these >It means a Deathclaw was sharpening their claws >The Alpha came down on all fours and charged at Richardson >A few feet into its charge and it began limping >The attack Richardson made hadn’t been a prodding attack, it was a strategy >Due to the injured legs the Alpha was slow, even more so for another Deathclaw, EVEN MORE for Richardson >Richardson waited until the very last second to parry the Alpha >In an attempt to keep Richardson out from behind him >Which would have meant death >The Alpha turned on its heels >It would have been better off running away >Richardson somehow understood balance >Seems like a strange concept, but Richardson understood that if you leaned forward, it’d be easy to be pushed forward >He also understood the general concept of Kinetic energy and momentum >When the Alpha turned, he’d be fighting against all of his own momentum >Timed with a perfect blunt strike of his shoulder, he put the Alpha on its ass

>The Alpha didn’t have any time to attempt to get up >Richardson was ontop of him >Richardson’s right leg pinning the Alpha’s left leg and Richardson’s left leg dug into the ground for stability >After he cemented his pin on the Alpha he began to rip apart his abdomen with huge arcing slashes with his claws >His head was down as to force the Alpha to try and push him off with his arm strength, instead of trading blows with him >Which the Alpha was far from able >In a last attempt to escape with its life the Alpha kicked Richardson away with his right leg >The Alpha flipped on its stomach, but before it could push itself off into a sprint Richardson planted his foot firmly on the back of the Alpha’s neck >The Alpha tried once to get up but was met with Richardson pressing down hard with his talons >The Alpha lay breathing hard under Richardson’s tight grip, one eye looking right at Richardson >I wanted to call Richardson off, because this was the most unnatural thing I had ever seen Richardson, and Deathclaws in general, do >But how could I? Richardson had just beat the everloving shit out of the second most dangerous beast in the Mojave >The first being himself of course >Richardson didn’t gloat for long to the dying Alpha >A few growls and a few strange noises later and Richardson was done communicating >He reached down slowly and the Alpha’s flame went out with a deafening *crunch* ​ >I guess Deathclaw necks are harder to break >A few seconds after killing the Alpha, Richardson reared up high and put his arms into the air with a truly magnificent roar >But in all honesty it sounded too much like a literal “roar” >In all honesty he may have SAID “War”. >I had heard that some very intelligent Deathclaws could simulate human speech >They were known to mispronounce Ws.

>”Peter, this may be the coolest moment in my entire life.” >”No, wait until you see the Enclave.” >We gave Richardson a few seconds to bask in the sun before I called him over >He gazed at me then began sniffing at the air >It was unlike him to not do as I say, unless he thought there may be a threat >I turned and began surveying the area >Nothing >When I got back to looking at Richardson he began slowly jogging in the direction the Deathclaw had come from >”Let's go see what he’s looking for.” >We watched as Richardson crested a hill, turned his head and began his descent down towards the unknown >When we followed me and Conrad looked like we had just seen a gold mine >Richardson wasn’t jogging anymore >He had his head close to the ground sniffing at the quickly thrown together nest >and its seven unborn inhabitants >”Holy shit.” >”Conrad, shit can’t be holy.” >”Shut the fuck up.” >We approached the nest and crouched down to look at the eggs >”So it turns out Conrad, Richardson just beat the ever living shit out of an Alpha Female. There’s possibly two options here for us. Either the male was nearby, meaning the Female wouldn’t mate with Richardson. Or Richardson didn’t give a fuck and just wanted to kill her.” >”Or he killed her for the eggs.” >I looked at Richardson and pondered the possibility for a minute. >”Why?” >”She was obviously going to die soon whether or not Richardson tore her a new one or not. He knew she wouldn’t give up her eggs willingly, it was a mercy killing to save her eggs.” >I looked at Richardson again and searched his eyes for some deeper plan >It was obvious to me that Richardson was much smarter than he seemed, and he seemed to be one of the smartest Deathclaws ever

>”Richardson knew the female, maybe it was his mother, but he knew her nonetheless.” >Conrad looked at me confused as Richardson leaned in close to listen >”He saw her and knew something was wrong. Think about it from the perspective of Richardson. >Say this was his mother. Why would she be so hurt and near death in the middle of nowhere? >Why would she put her eggs in a thrown together nest without another Deathclaw in sight? >Wherever Richardson’s pack was living is ransacked, overrun, destroyed. >If I’m right he knows this and knows he can only preserve his pack by seeing to it that these eggs survive. Sometimes it scares me how smart he is.” >For a Deathclaw, Richardson finds a way to give me a look of Gloom >I must have been dead on the money

>After we dumped out Conrad’s bag and placed the eggs safely inside we began a slower pace north, past Sloan >We always kept the road to our left as we would use it as a sort of indicator of our location, if we got into a firefight and had to think fast >A little past Sloan, Richardson stopped in his tracks and stared off into the distance across the road >ohno.feels >What was apparently a mine of sorts had a single entrance >Beside the entrance was a big construction vehicle, obviously broken down for some time >But in the entrance to the mine were dozens of Deathclaws, piled on top of one another like sacks of grain >I looked at Richardson and for some reason expected to see him sobbing >A cold and emotionless gaze was all I received >In this moment I realized that Richardson was so much like me it was scary >He was saved only because he was too young to fight >His entire family, all of his people, slaughtered for what they were >I understood that some would say it must have been done, but for Richardson it was a realization about the world of man >Mercy had been alienated when people gave up on the old world >Luckily Richardson met me >Someone he could align himself with >How did me and Conrad feel? >We were just glad Richardson was on our side >Imagine something like him if it was out to kill Humanity as a whole

>We gave Richardson a few minutes to take it all in >He’d need to have that fire in his heart for the battle to come >After he had his fill he turned away a followed our slow pace down the road >”Peter, you never did tell me the plan. Is it time to take action against the BoS and NCR?” >We had talked out our plan in PMs because fuck these BoS boys know how to metagame >But they were also ignorant >Ever since we started turning people against them they began to take every action we made VERY seriously >”No, the time for action is not yet upon us, but soon it will be. There is still one more thing to be said before we can face the enemy in force.” >”What do you mean? The time for war is now. We can’t just keep playing these games of peekaboo with the enemy, they’ve slaughtered people openly because they won’t hate us.” >I gritted my teeth >Turned on my heel >And hit Conrad as hard as I could >For most it would send them on their ass >For Conrad it sent him back a few steps before bumping into Richardson, who stopped him from falling >”You don’t think I fucking know that? They wiped more than half of the Enclave’s population from existence Conrad. >They attacked us mercilessly when we had obviously lost already. After they destroyed the head quarters in Washington they moved from outpost to outpost and MASSACRED us. >When they found our mobile fortress, they destroyed it without even trying to get the children out. >They backed my people in a corner and kept fucking shooting. >Conrad I’ve tried showing you why I do what I do, but let me try to put it into terms anyone would understand. >The Enclave is on its last legs. We can’t fail again, or Humanity is going to spiral into death with the last of us. >I have to take every precaution to see to it that we win this. Stop treating things as if they’re a game. >We will all die Conrad, every single man, woman, and child, until they can enslave us. >We can’t live that life, so they’ll drive us into extinction.” >Conrad stared at me and I could feel the regret flood over him >He took my issues seriously but never saw the bigger picture >He thought that this was one of many Enclave victories >Ignorant of how much death was brought to my people >I couldn’t blame him for being confused or having his fun loving view >But changing his view would have to be learned with a serious emotional, physical, and intellectual outburst >”I’m sorry Peter. I know I haven’t been taking this as seriously as I should... It's hard to see myself on the losing end of a conflict such as this. I can’t put myself in your shoes or see what you’ve seen.” >I gave Conrad a few seconds then I patted his shoulder >”You’ve never faced defeat Conrad. That’s the only reason you don’t understand. As the Enclave has been reduced to just over a few thousand old men and women, I’ve learned that our defeat will come with the price of our people as a whole. I hope you never have to face such things.”

>We talked back and forth for sometime before Conrad pondered a question >”So, what ARE we doing?” >I smiled and pointed at a radio station a few mile away >”We’re going to siege the Black Mountain.” >Of course we were doing this for dramatic effect, we had already planned a lot of shit out in PMs >The siege was us putting the Lynch Mob’s king in check >”So how will we do it? Vulpe said the Black Mountain is infested with mutants.” >”Our friends in the Legion will help us, few mutants are smart enough to formulate a strategy. >One on one they are a huge threat, but with twenty of us and Richardson to make sure they can’t get close? >They’ll be mince meat.” >So we set out up a road towards the peak of the mountain, eventually we came across a shack and a friendly mutant >Conrad called them green niggers >”I suppose it's true then, the Enclave really is in the Mojave. Are you here to wipe us out?” >Conrad is unaware of the Super Mutant and Enclave past >”We’re here to take the mountain.” >”Then you know that most of the mutants won’t go without a fight. Just because you have a ​ Deathclaw, you think you can clear out the mountain?” ​ >At this time I nod to Conrad who aims the flare gun in the air and shoots it >The mutant winced at the bright light in the sky >”The Legion will be here soon to help us take the mountain. If you have any friends on the mountain you want to save, now is the time.” >He didn’t respond to me >He turned and began sprinting up the road until he was out of sight >”So mutants are just as smart as us?” >”No, very few of them are intelligent. Those who are, are also very experienced in the wasteland. They know who and who not to fuck with.” >This entire time Richardson just scratched his ass

>We didn’t have to wait long before we spotted a Legion scout peering over a rock a few hundred yards away. >A few minutes later our Centurion friends jogged onto the road we were on from a path in the hills >We expected a dozen or so Legionnaires >What we got was nearly forty soldiers, three cohorts >Vulpe’s brother walked up to me and gave me a forearm shake >”How are you friend? How is my brother?” >”I am well and so is he, I see your retinue has grown larger.” >”Yes, since you began gaining notoriety in the wasteland, the NCR has pulled men off the border to send to kill you. Caesar has sent more cohorts into the Mojave, the time to strike the Dam is near because of you. I never would have guessed you belong to the tribe of the Enclave, we’ve heard stories about your people’s power.” >Obviously cringe shit >Centurion bro is edgy, but his story is absolutely fantastic once I read his posts >Centurion of the 13th Scouting Legion turned to a Primus Pilus, leading a war party in the Mojave >Guy raided the NCR Prison in the beginning of the game to get his cohort out >He successfully attacked and destroyed half of Boulder City while escorting an injured Tribune >Guy is dangerous in his own right, would not fuck with him >”Why have you signalled us friend?” >I smiled and pointed at the top of Black Mountain >”We will soon begin a frontal attack against the NCR and the BoS. First I need to take the mountain and the radio station.” >”When are we to attack?” >”As soon as you think your men will be ready, it’s infested with mutants.” >Centurion bro turned his head and gave the other Legion player a signal >Legion bros draw swords, spears, and machetes, a few even have some dank looking shields >”If you are facing the the enemies of the Legion, you have our full support. Let's get this done.”

>We begin a steady march up the road until we come across the generation one mutant and a few other mutants >”We’re no threat to you or the Enclave, we want to leave.” >”Leave then.” >Once the mutants leave, Centurion bro asks me why I let them live >”Generation 1 mutants can be a deadly adversary or a powerful ally. In the future we may come across the same mutant, and see him as a friend.” >He nods and we continue up the road until we are attacked by Nightkin >I knew about Nightkin >I knew they were very dangerous >They didn’t know about Richardson >As soon as one of them charged at us with its huge sword >Richardson emerged from some bushes and was on top of it before it could blink >In all honesty visualizing us against the mutants went like this all the way up the mountain >Three or four mutants would charge at us >Richardson would pounce on one and rip it to shreds >The rest of us would dog pile the others until we were able to kill them >Every so often one of the mutants would swing a rebar club and hit one of the legionnaires with a shield >like this https://youtu.be/fRK3bJtDAjg?t=38 >By the time we got to the top of the mountain we had suffered three deaths and 6 injuries >On the other hand we had killed twenty Mutants >If they attacked us in force it would have been a real shit fest

>After we got past the Mutant’s shitty shacks we found the radio station >And >We found a big fucking Nightkin dressed up as a girl >”Peter, what in the name of Uncle Sam is that thing?” >”Some of these mutants are retarded,” I looked over at the big fucker ,”Really fucking retarded.” >The Legion guys look at me while this Night kin is talking to itself >Conrad tosses me a PM and I shit a brick >doitbro.jpeg >Conrad gives me his RCW and takes the Viper leader’s sword out of my bag >I still had it >Imagine a single edged european sword, technically a falchion but isn’t as retarded looking >He approaches the big blue fucker and starts talking mad shit >”You know if God made me in his image, he was really fucking around when he made you.” >Fullretardengaged.nuka >Big blue fuck charges at Conrad swinging wildly >Conrad ducks and rolls under the swings >Although he does get a glancing hit on the back of his head >Once he’s back up, he’s laughing and smiling >”Tell me Peter, is your friend insane?” >Legion bro has never met the Conrad that is able to beat the fuck out of armies of men >”No, he just really likes fighting. Somewhere out there in the wastes is a vault full of people like him.” >Legion bro does this. >*His eyes widen as he looks back at the fighting*

>It's been a few minutes in the fight and big blue bitch is getting tired >Instead of swinging wildly and trying to hit Conrad >The big fucker is just trying to catch him >When Conrad knows the fucker can’t catch him he starts putting in some damage >Every time he ducks under a swing or slips out of a grip he’ll hit the fucker as hard as he can in the head >If it was a Human I reckon that it’d be on the ground spazzing out with its brain absolutely destroyed by now >Conrad PMs me some shit to say in game >bigoofmydude.pipboy >”Conrad go ahead and finish it, we have work to do.” >Conrad responds by side stepping the big blue bitch’s next attack to the left >Once he had gotten out of the way he turned with lightning speed and swung down as a fast as he could >He amputated the mutants arms >Halfway up the forearm he chopped them clean off >The big fuck went straight into the ground and began yelling in agony >Conrad walked back over to me and took his RCW back >He didn’t turn to the mutant but he aimed his gun at it and just held the trigger until it was out of charge >”Why did you have to do that vault dweller?” >”I don’t know, because it was fun to beat the hell out of a big blue nigger?” >Legion bros didn’t respond

>”So what is the plan now, Peter?” >”The plan is to bring the people of the Mojave to our side. That’s our part here. For you on the other hand, are you willing to help us face the enemy in the frontal assault?” >The legion guys looked at each other then nodded to me >”Good, because we’ll need you to get as many men as possible.” >”We can gather five more cohorts by nightfall, what’s the plan?” >I smiled and scratched my head >”Listen to the radio tonight, you’ll know what to do.” >They didn’t wait to talk anymore, they just fucked right off into the hills >Unlike the Lynch Mob, the Legion Bros played by the rules of NPC communication >They’d have to travel to a specific safe house and contact other cohorts >Lynch Mob just magiced in a couple NPCs whenever they wanted >BoS scribe bitch even magically found a group of BoS knights wandering around the wasteland >GM gassed their NPCs a lot >”So what’s our next move?” >”You’re gonna leave with Richardson, I want you back to Primm by midday, and back here by midnight.” >Conrad is mega fucking confused >”What’re you gonna do?” >”I have to get our plan ready. Strap your backpack to Richardson and run as fast as possible.” >He just stares at me, still confused >”I won’t be able to get the plan ready without staying here, and we can’t get Vulpe and the men up here without having one of us getting a message to them pronto.” >”Alright, so what’s your part of the plan?” >”Listen to the radio, you’ll figure it out.” >Conrad hesitated but strapped his bag to Richardson and began a running pace down the mountain >I told him to be there midday, he’d be there before lunch

>When Conrad was a few hundred feet away I sat against a wall and sighed >Time to have my character’s willpower break for a little while >When you’re in my character’s position sometimes you just gotta cry a little bit >Pull a Fury and have a breakdown for about half an hour >Once I got myself back together I walked up to the radio station and made my way inside >Place was a wreck, but the retarded mutants were smart enough not to smash all of the equipment >I spent several hours in game fixing equipment, or connecting unused pieces that were hidden away in the back of the station >Before I started working on the radio’s broadcasting strength it might have been able to get to a fifth of the Mojave >By the time I finished it could ping off every single radio in New Vegas and broadcast for miles outside of it >Two hours before sunset I opened up four channels >Three broadcasting on frequently used public frequencies, and one a secured line

>Static filled the air waves as the broadcast came into tune >”Sweet America, hello again, this is President John Henry Eden. >I’d like to have a chat. The Enclave is back, America. Ah, no, not just on your radio. >Right now Enclave troops are patrolling the Capital Wasteland. >These fine men and women, under the command of the stalwart Colonel, Augustus Autumn, have one mission. >The restoration of American peace and order. But let’s hear from the man himself, shall we America? >I give you Colonel Augustus Autumn!” >The broadcast pauses for a second before a new voice is heard >”Thank you Mr. President. People of the Capital Wasteland, I am Colonel Autumn. >By now, you have encountered Enclave troops in your towns, in your settlements. >When you see the Enclave, you see the United States Government. >We are authorized to restore order and civility, by any means necessary. >Just stay out of the way and let us do our job. Interfere with the Enclave’s mission, and you will be dealt with, harshly.” >Another pause occurs as the first voice resumes speaking >”Very good Colonel, very good. So, there you have it, my darling America. >Enclave troops are now in your neighborhoods, in your lives, in your hearts. >Together, we will restore the glory of this great nation. One problem at a time. >So remember America, the Enclave is working around the clock to return this country to greatness. >All you need is a little patience…. a little faith. >Until next time, this is your president, John Henry Eden, signing off.”

>This same message looped on for an hour >Little by little the people of the Mojave tuned in and listened patiently >They had heard so much about the Enclave >Was this really all there was though? >A simple looping message? >Just as some were beginning to lose interest an alien voice came through the static. >”That was the last radio broadcast our president sent out to the people of Washington. Four years ago. >Many of my brothers died as they took up arms against their attackers. >Before we could fight back our president was dead. >Before we could get the children away, the Colonel was dead. >Our punishment for the crimes we committed was absolute destruction and extermination of our people. >I hear you asking yourself, what crimes did the Enclave commit? >That’s simple my fellow Americans, so simple in fact that I think even our enemies will understand. >We refused to let America die. >We fought against a Technological Autocracy by trying to free our fellow Americans from their grip. >We shielded innocents from the terrors of the wasteland. >On every front we faced our enemies, and sacrificed our lives so that Americans may have a chance to survive. >We put a hundred years of hard work, blood, sweat, and tears into a gift to give freely to our fellow Americans. >My family gave their lives to see to it that no longer would Americans falter under the oppression of false heroes. >You may have heard about the recent attacks, or maybe you haven’t. >Bonnie Springs and Good Springs are wiped off the map, their inhabitants dead or in hiding with us. >Their crimes against the NCR and the Brotherhood of Steel was treason. >Treason of the highest caliber. >Such a terrible crime that the NCR killed women and children as they fled. >Tortured captives and executed the injured and defenseless. >Yes, I must say my fellow Americans, Yes! >Refusing to take up arms as a slave against those that protect you, is surely the greatest crime that could be committed. >Refusing to be used as a weapon to destroy freedom TRULY is a great crime! >Yet they won’t stop there, not even there will they stop punishing the treasonous. >Now they send an army of murderers to Primm, where we have tried to protect those who could not protect themselves. >I know many of you fear for their lives, but do not. >I am but a single man, America, and I have caused my greatest enemies to shudder in fear. >They do not fear my weapons or my skills. >They fear the truth I hold, no, they fear the love I hold for America >Even as I speak they are trying to plan a way to force the Enclave into submission >Yet they still do not understand that there is no lengths I won’t go to to see that we, as a country, win this.

>I paused to take in a deep breath >My people... sons and daughters of America. >For too long have we been a broken nation, we've have been shunned...oppressed… >You’ve been conquered by those you sought to escape! >Two hundred years ago, the leaders of this great nation asked for time. >When we went to war we knew that only the truest of Americans might survive, and the time we asked for was granted by you, you, the strength in my arm, the holders of my dreams. >In a time such as this, I vow this much, the history of these days will be written in blood. >Throughout America we will be fighting, by crushing the armies of our enemies, by seizing the weapons they thought to turn against us, we will be fighting for our very existence. >As we destroy their forces they will be given the opportunity to parlay and allowed to surrender >But if there are those who would deny us peace, refuse us our rightful place on this earth. >Then we shall unleash such terrible vengeance, that generations yet unborn will cry out in anguish! >For many lifetimes, we have suffered unbearable hardships. >Banished by our enemies, to die from disease, from famine; they’ve scarred us, they’ve weakened us, but that time has PASSED! >For too long have we worked away on empty stomachs, slowly rebuilding our strength, our pride, and our nation, only to be destroyed again by our enemies, but that time HAS PASSED! >Our forefathers embarked on the greatest journey in the history of all mankind. >A quest for freedom, America became that freedom, but in the dawn of a new age we were struck down by our enemies, into a wasteland, this wasteland. >This new world changed us, at first it weakened us…. but in fact, we became stronger. >In the time you have given the Enclave we have rebuilt our pride, we have rebuilt our strength, and soon we will rebuild our Nation! >Those who defy us shall face a swift death, or a humble surrender. >And for those who disagree with us peacefully? >We will give them new insights into our cause. >Many of them know now what they have done, so through the kindness only a father can have for a child, the Enclave shall grant them mercy. >Yet this is not a day for mercy, today is a day of unification! >Today is the day we demand our freedom! >On this day we stand united again! On this day, those driven to divide us, will hear our voice! >ON THIS DAY WE SHALL ACT AS ONE! WE SHALL BE IGNORED NO MORE! >From the skies we shall smite the usurpers of our great nation! >And though they sweep through our land like the sands of winter, never again will we bow before them! >Never again will we fail our people! Never again will we endure THEIR oppression! Never again endure THEIR tyranny! >We will strike the enemies of freedom without warning and without mercy! >FIGHTING as one HAND, one HEART, one SOUL! >We will shatter their dreams, and haunt their nightmares! >We shall drench our family's graves with their blood! >And as the last breath tears at THEIR lungs, as we rise from the ashes of our nation, they will know that the twilight of a new age has engulfed them...... PEOPLE OF AMERICA! >NOW IS, OUR TIME!” >Throughout the wasteland listeners turned toward the NCR and Brotherhood of Steel >Not as civilians or settlers >But as members of a pack >Their eyes drew a predatory gaze as they stood from their shacks, campfires, and ruined buildings >A nationalist’s spirit of rebellion was burned into the heart of almost every listener, and a match was all that was needed to connect the burning hearts >A single action to unite them into a Grand Inferno against the enemies of the Enclave >Against the enemies of America

>As soon as the broadcast ended I flipped off the radio transmission and smashed the broadcasting equipment with a hammer >After I grabbed my gun and backpack I booked it outside and was met with the darkness of midnight. >Down in the first camp I could see dozens of lights, easily fifty or more >The Lynch Mob was coming for me >I jumped from the stairs of the radio station and rolled down a hill for a few seconds before getting back to my feet and sprinting at top speeds >The NCR and BoS were marching straight up the road, which meant that they’d not find me very soon and begin a fox hunt >I was back at the foot of the mountain when I heard the yelling and screaming of NCR Sharp Shooters spotting me and calling out my location to everyone else >They had about twenty five players in the Lynch Mob, and about fifty+ NPCs >Me getting a good enough speed roll to out run ALL of them was impossible >But outrunning them was never the plan >I got about half way between Black Mountain and Sloan before the first Lynch Mobber was less than a hundred feet behind me >I dropped my back pack, turned, and shot the closest fucker in the chest >It killed the fucker, and he raged royally in the OOC because “its not fair that he can just turn and shoot at us” >I keep running until I came across the quarry, and the bodies >Getting to Sloan was impossible >Getting to the quarry, was possible >I leapt over the pile of Deathclaws and hit the ground running

>After I hit the ground I sprinted at full speed for about fifteen seconds before I realized there was no other exit to the quarry >I stop in my tracks and turn to see six or seven Lynch Mobbers coming through the entrance >My only chance of surviving is to Solid Snake these fuckers >I hip, skip, hop, jump, duck, and dive my way over to the nearest crane >The big machinery hasn’t been used since the Great War, or even longer >I look over the crane and get a feel for the stability of it >spiderboi.aol >I start climbing the crane until I’m about twenty feet up >Now the Quarry is filled to the very brim with the Lynch Mob >Every other faggot is in power armor, and most of the NCR faggots are Veteran Rangers with a terrible back story >One guy is literally a one eyed cripple who is unable to walk, but gets carted around by trooper because he’s a “really good shot” >I’m sitting here watching them peer around the Quarry like a bunch of retards >After awhile they start getting into search groups and start looking for me in the little caves >Bad idea faget >You see there was one or two players that always meta gamed me, and they were at the moment just camping the crane, waiting for me to make some sort of post so they can just magically see me >Instead of being a good player and roleplaying >I rolled for accuracy and speed >Crit the accuracy and get 17 on the speed >I jump down from my hiding spot and shoot the first guy in the face >Getslimed.nickelodeon >The second guy yells out before I shoot him right in the temple >Apparently every mother fucker around here heard a half a second yelp >Everyone fucking closes in on me >Do an emergency search roll on one of the dead guys >Has a frag grenade >I grab it and chuck it behind me >Kill an NPC and initiate John Wick mode >I’m going from support pillar to support pillar shooting at the closing in horde >So far i’ve killed four of them, and John Wick mode is only slowing them down >Eventually they’re close enough to swing at me >They obviously want to take me alive >Enemy does a speed roll >Crits and knocks me out from behind

>For about two hours in game i’m knocked right the fuck out >Lynch Mob has taken this time to bitch at one another about how it was their fault that this “Fascist got this far.” >Once I’m awake I get literally bombarded by the Edge Lords with their snowflake monologues >”How could you do this? Why are you so evil?” Etc Etc >For about twenty in game minutes they are trying to make me feel bad for being my character >Faggots don’t get that my character doesn’t monologue and bitch like they all do >Eventually the dialogue dies down until I’m just sitting here listening to a couple faggots making them feel better about themselves >Eventually BoS Scribe bitch makes her way over >Talked shit nonstop >”Looks like we finally caught you, you’ll pay for what you’ve done.” >Throughout this entire monologue shit show i’ve literally not made a single post >They thought I was butt hurt >Wrong >”What have I done?” >Bitch spends literally ten minutes trying to think some shit up >”You represent the most hateful and oppressing faction in the wasteland. You’ve killed people in their name, and want to bring war to the Mojave.” >Too easy >”I represent my people, I’ve killed only to protect my people, and I will bring Freedom to the Mojave, for my people.” >Girl stutter types for a while because she’s got no clue on how to respond to that. >I don’t even give her the time of day >”Do you believe yourselves to be good people? Do you really think you’ve accomplished anything by capturing a single robotics technician?” >They’re whating at mach speeds >”You think that I’m some big bad wolf that’ll haunt you in the night, do you? Surely you thought this through, I mean you do know what you’ve done, don’t you?” >One of the NCR Rangers steps forward to put in her two cents >”We’ve brought an end to your crimes.” >”Really, my crimes? Wasn’t it you people that slaughtered an entire town?” >”They started shooting we had no choice.” >I laughed in their face >”Because you tortured and murdered their mayor, my god. You all really do believe in this false narrative.” >I giggle and yawn, unscared of them >One of the less cringy BoS guys steps in >”What’re you talking about?” >”You all really do think you’re some kind of heroes. You think that people see you as gods. You fucking fools… you aren’t the heroes of this story.” >Some random BoS fag punches me in the gut, fall to my knees and giggle a little for edge points

>”That’s it, silence me like you did those children in Bonnie Springs. You aren’t heroes. None of you are. Those among you who would have been heroes already left your groups long ago.” >I got back on my feet and smiled at them all >”I know it’s hard to fathom how far you’ve fallen. Yet, I’ve always known how detrimental you were to our great nation. It’s good to finally see you show your true colors.” >They all were getting their jimmies rustled, bad. >A very seldom few among them were rethinking the past events >I scanned through the quarry as I stretched my legs >A few hundred feet away I could see Conrad’s blond hair and pale skin just barely visible over a rock >Good, he was there >Meant he knew what was going down >”I gotta say, you did pick a beautiful morning to catch your villain. Honestly, I’d rather be playing baseball than be playing the part of the bad guy with all of you.” >I looked at my pipboy and saw the time >I gritted my teeth and sighed >”Just under an hour before first light. What I wouldn’t give to throw a football right now.” >I gulped and took a deep breath >Without warning I charged the BoS scribe bitch and completely knocked her on her ass >She didn’t hesitate to shoot me right in the chest while on her back

>I dropped to the ground like a stiff log >All of the Lynch Mob is what the fucking at this bitch >”Well fuck me.” >The shot to my chest is bad, really bad >My muscles are tensed up to the slow the bleeding and I’m trying not panic or let my adrenaline get to my head >BoS Scribe says this in OOC “Guess I get points for killing the Fascist.” >All the Lynch Mobbers saying cheesy shit in the OOC and liking each others post for about five minutes >GM starts typing a post up >*As Peter is lying in agony on the ground, all around the quarry dozens of flares are shot off in to the sky. Almost all of them coming from the entrance.* >They all turn to the entrance of the quarry to see Vulpe and Jackal standing there with almost a hundred armed settlers and robots >One of the BoS drops his gun and says >”Just a robotics technician…” >They all get ready to start firing at Vulpe as they hear a blood curdling war cry from behind them >BoS Scribe Bitch turns just in time to get cut in two >From Shoulder to hip >When she fell down a blue Vault Suit was standing in her place >”ATTACK!” >The Lynch Mob turned to find over a hundred Legion soldiers, a pissed off Deathclaw, and the Racist Vault Dweller >The Lynch Mob didn’t have time to get off any shots before the Legion made it a full out melee >A BoS Paladin charges at Conrad, only to be met by Richardson >Richardson grabbed the power armored demon by his head and slammed him down >He Pinned him with a foot on his pelvis >He let out a huge Roar as he leaned down and tore the man in HALF >He chunked the body at a few NCR fags hiding behind a rock shooting into the frey >I watched idly as Conrad chopped and slashed at everyone and everything around him >For a minute we had them on their heels, but they had power armor and big fucking guns >Conrad, followed by three Legion, got to me and began rallying the troops to protect me >”God damn Conrad, you really got her.” >He smiled and raised up from behind a dead body to shoot at a few NCR >Two more Legion ran past the body Conrad was using and clashed with a BoS Knight who was advancing on us >”Don’t worry Peter, we’ve got you now. Legion! Get some medics over, the Captain’s hurt!” >I roll to my side as to clench my chest more tightly >”I’m gone Conrad, once the outside wound is shut nothing will stop the arteries from killing me in seconds.” >Conrad looked at me in horror >”What fuck are you talking about?” >”I said it myself, they had no idea what lengths I’d go to.” >Out of the corner of my eye I saw a BoS Paladin burst out of the bulk of the fighting and charge us >A few of the Legion counter charged but were knocked down >Conrad started unloading his RCW but it didn’t do shit >About five yards before he could get to Conrad I saw Jackal jump on the guy’s back with a stick of dynamite >The Paladin stopped and tried to get Jackal off of him >Jackal was trying to stick it in his power armor’s hatch valve >When he figured it wouldn’t work he wrapped his arms around the Paladins neck >*Boom* ​ >It blew the Paladins head clean off, and took half of Jackal with it

>The lines of battle were evening out as Vulpe charged into the fighting with the militia he had put together >Using that he pushed the Lynch Mob back and regained ground on them >By the time we had secured our troops and the Melee was over, half of us were dead while a third of the Lynch Mob was dead >We had taken out most of their NCR but the Brotherhood fags all had Power Armor >Both of our Centurions were fine but only thirty of the initial hundred legion were alive >Vulpe’s men had suffered about twenty casualties >The Egors were serving as cannon fodder in our advances on them >There were a hundred and fifty of us, and fifty of the Lynch Mob left >Vulpe and Conrad are trying to talk to me while Centurion bros are holding the line >”God fuck, he’s really fucked up!” >”What can we do?” >”We’d need gallons of blood to make sure he didn’t die in surgery.” >”This is a battlefield, there’s not a surgery gonna happen you fools.” >They spend a few minutes bickering back and forth while Richardson is killing the injured Lynch Mobbers we captured >”Was that really your plan Peter? Get yourself shot? One hell of a signal.” >I laughed a little and patted Conrad’s leg >*thump thump thump thump thump* ​ >”It wasn’t apart of the plan, and it wasn’t the signal. But we had no time, I had to wing it.” ​ ​ >I forced out a last smile then rolled on my back, releasing the the tension in my chest and relaxing my muscles >I’d be dead in just a few seconds >But not before I saw them, like knights of Yore on the horizon >Their name? The Enclave. >Their Mission? To protect the freedoms of any and all Americans. >*thump thump thump thump thump* ​ >Over head a squad of vertibirds swooped over the battle and unleashed a tendril of fire upon the Lynch Mob >As my eyes glazed over >Conrad picked up his sword and held it up high as he ran past our men and charged into the arms of the enemy >”FOR THE ENCLAVE!” >As he clashed into the BoS and NCR horde, all of the Legion and the militia followed him >A few seconds later, a dozen Enclave vertibirds landed and lifted off, after each of them deployed a squadron of Enclave soldiers >The Enclave troops smashed the Lynch Mob and joined the melee with Conrad >It was a slaughter >Enclave troops in X-02 Power Armor pinned BoS paladins and stomped in their helmets until nothing was left except paste >As Enclave troops slaughtered the BoS they yelled out into the morning light >”FOR CAPTAIN RICHARDSON!” >Not a single BoS or NCR was left alive in the end >But lying peacefully in a seemingly sleepless state was Peter Richardson, direct descendant of the last true president of the United States

>After the battle was over they crowded my body and saluted my corpse >Richardson, Vulpe, and Conrad mourned as the Legion burned the dead NCR and BoS >In one fell swoop we destroyed 90% of the player base in the roleplay >Conrad, Vulpe, and the Legion would join with the Enclave in arms against the NCR and BoS >The Lynch Mob would make new characters and try to fight off the Enclave >I didn’t make a new character >I had to help bring a chapter to an end >And bring a twilight of a new age into the world https://soundcloud.com/grim-thy-great/finale-theme

Epilogue

>Word of my death spread quickly all over the Mojave >A single flame was extinguished by the dirt and mud, but many more took up my mantle >Soon after the Enclave began a full invasion on the Mojave, the Legion attacked the dam >From west the Legate lead a huge attack force >From the east Conrad and Vulpe lead the militia >From the skies the Enclave tore at any shred of hope the NCR had >The last of the BoS gathered a small group to try and fight off the attackers >Enclave traitors were even found among the weak resistance >Each hung from the neck until dead >Two hundred Enclave troops were spread throughout the Mojave >In Novac the citizens came out one by one and surrendered until a few NCR lackies were left >The town was purged of the NCR terrorists and the citizens were left in peace >In West Side, Enclave troops were welcomed with open arms >NCR and BoS refugees were dragged out of their hiding places, and executed on the spot for High Treason against the U.S. Government >Up north a militia patrol discovered a contingent of NCR Troopers who had been harassing a mutant settlement, and due to the loss of the dam were now without large support or orders >A single Enclave vertibird was used to send word to the settlement that the Enclave had ejected most of the NCR from the Mojave >These troops were not backed by an army of NCR fodder >The Enclave wanted no quarrel with the mutants so the envoy left after relaying the message >The NCR remnants were slaughtered without mercy by the mutants and an Enclave Desserter was surrendered to a militia squadron >In the matter of two months most, if not all, of the NCR had been driven out or killed in the Mojave >A few strongholds were still left, but Enclave and Legion forces rallied together for the ensuing battles >Our Centurion friends sieged Forlorn Hope and within two days they had crucified every single soldier within the fort >After Camp Golf was burned to the ground Conrad and Vulpe lead a full scale attack on Camp McCarran >They lead a three hundred man strong militia, dubbed the New Enclave Army >Within a day they had dragged out and executed the soldiers, and sold those that surrendered to the Legion >It was chance that it happened but an Enclave Recon Team stumbled upon Hidden Valley >An attack force made up of four Enclave Death Squads, Fifty Militia, Thirty Legion, and Conrad attacked the place >The BoS truly knew how it felt to lose their families >In the end only the children of the BoS were left alive >In accordance to Enclave law they were not to be harmed, but instead reeducated in the Enclave school system >Only two NCR strongholds were left when the dust of the lightning fast Enclave tactics settled >New Vegas itself >And the Mojave Outpost >There was not a chance for either to survive but a show of power must be made >A simultaneous attack on both would have to occur >Vulpe lead an attack on the outpost with the New Enclave Army >While Conrad lead three Enclave squads in an attack on the NCR at the strip >They had gravely misread the data and were terribly outnumbered >They suffered several casualties >Even Richardson had been injured >When it seemed that they would all die >The people of Freeside and the Strip revealed themselves >With Enclave arm bands and a burning inferno of patriotism they rose up and attacked the NCR in the streets >The Kings lead an ambush against the NCR from the back alleys and roofs >Within minutes the tides of battle turned and the NCR were all but destroyed in the Mojave

>In the end the NCR was crippled, and the BoS was no longer an entity in the Mojave >The Legion was given no land or pay for the blood they shed, but a warning >”The U.S. Government is back. We will allow you to go through the Mojave Outpost to the west where you can expand and enslave at your heart’s desire. But, you will NOT lay a hand on any child, you will surrender any and all children you capture to the Enclave. Our side of this agreement is that the Enclave will defend you if there ever is a time when the Legion is pushed back into the Mojave. We will hold this land against the NCR and slaughter our enemies wherever they are found. Do not make yourself one of them.” >The Legion didn’t even try renegotiating this >They expanded west and left the Mojave to the growing Enclave

>But what happened to our heroes? >Vulpe was granted his freedom to do as he pleased because of how highly the Enclave spoke of him >He bred and trained dogs in Primm for a few years until he got word that an old friend in the east had cut out a nice piece of land for himself >Vulpe rounded up a few other Legion veterans and headed east with his retinue of beasts and men >The Centurion bros were promoted to Tribunes and were the only two Legion men permitted to treat with the Enclave, other than Caesar himself >They were announced to be the greatest politician warriors in the Legion >Most of the Egors lay destroyed in the battle of the Deathclaw Canyon >But through sheer luck one of the memory drives was found and installed into any Protectrons that were repaired or found >The Enclave rebuilt a Robco factory south of West Side >Hundreds of Protectrons were built >Hundreds of Egors now patrolled the Mojave >On almost every corner in a settlement an Egor is stationed, all crime in cities and towns plummet due to this >The Strip was kept almost untouched when the Enclave moved in >Except for the Lucky 38 >Enclave troops assaulted it and killed whatever was inside >After that all Securitrons were deactivated and scrapped for parts >The Kings of Freeside were given the duty to protect it, along with Egor assistance, and report directly to the governor of the Mojave >The Silver Rush was ransacked by Enclave Agents, the owners of the establishment were dragged out and shot for crimes against the United States >Unlike the Brotherhood of Steel the energy weapons were studied, broken down, and manufactured to be sold to the New Enclave Army >Energy weapons sold by the Enclave were reserved for NEA personnel and almost all ballistic weapons were sold to the people of the Mojave for near to nothing >No longer were Americans helpless to attacks by raiders >The Dam was restored to working capacity and soon hit 100% efficiency >Enclave scientists replicated a nearly perfect purifier, mirroring the one meant to be put to use in the Capital Wasteland >Tens of thousands of people no longer drank brown irradiated water >They could smile and drink happily >Enclave Biologists replicated a few species of fish and soon the Colorado River was filled with edible fish >Even Ghouls and Mutants drank from the river >And after they drank they looked to see the Enclave staring at them >The Enclave directed and moved all ghouls and Mutants up to Jacobstown, peacefully >That is where they became an independent city/state but they still held close ties with the Enclave >So close that, in the case of a few Super Mutants from the town, some became members of the New Enclave Army >They were equipped with special armor to accommodate their large size >The Deathclaw eggs we found were given to the Enclave and soon they began breeding a front line force of intelligent Deathclaws >Some of them could speak a few words >Now we come to our Final Hero >Conrad >The Vault Dweller who left his home as a Conqueror, a Champion, and a Hero. >Now as this story comes to an end he is a true Conqueror, a real Champion, and the most renowned Hero on the west coast >But what happened to Conrad? >Where has this victory sent him? >Will we ever see Conrad again? >Conrad left the Mojave, never to be seen in the region again >Some say he travels the wasteland destroying anything he deems to be UnAmerican >Others say he travels to his vault to lead his people to a life of conquest >But in reality? >Conrad heads east where John Henry Eden, the last president, was murdered by usurpers of America. >He didn’t go alone.