24 March 2019 Alesha Dixon “I have so many unfulfilled ambitions” Cupboard lovelove Easy and delicious recipes Smar t set Tailored looks with a twist

Win! Win! Win! £1,000 with our prize crossword

24ontents March 2019 C This page, right: Blazer, £159.95, 40 44 Scotch & Soda (scotch-soda. com); jumper, £17.99, Daisy Street ER (daisystreet. co.uk); skirt, £149, Hobbs (hobbs.co.uk); heels, £22.99, New Look (newlook.com) earrings, £15.99, Mango (mango.com)

44 Food 58 My The things Fashion How to transform store cupboard favourite 4 Get this! staples into lavish meals photo they say... This week’s must-haves 51 Wine Former “Change your life today. 10 8 Focus Jamie Goode can’t choose EastEnders Don’t gamble on the future, Spot-on prints for spring between pinot grigio and pinot gris star Kellie act now, without delay” 36 Agony aunt 10 A cut above 53 Gardens Shirley Simone de Beauvoir By Jane O’Gorman Alan Titchmarsh Check out chic tailored designs saves the pennies shares a (1908-1986) and Dr Rosemary 32 In the closet by growing blooms from seed treasured Leonard Bridal dress designer Caroline snapshot 54 Hot off the press Castigliano has aisles of style The latest fascinating People fiction reviewed 22 Life as I know it Regulars 57 Fiction Lifestyle With hit singer Jack Savoretti 7 First look A story by novelist Natasha Bell 31 Go with the flow 24 Alesha Dixon The hottest tickets in town 59-74 Switch on From fascinating ports of call to The Britain’s Got Talent judge 18-21 Beauty The week on TV and radio spectacular scenery, a river cruise can turn her hand to singing, Clean up your act with the best 75 Mindy Hammond on the Danube has it all presenting and writing – but she’d soap bars, plus all the latest Fur is flying at Hammond Towers 38 Victoria’s best secretly love to be in a movie beauty must-haves as felines battle to be top cat... Victoria Gray picks perfect 28 David Kross 34 Health 77 Stars presents for Mother’s Day The German star is bang on Though it’s usually linked to Russell Grant predicts your week 40 Interiors target in his latest film telling alcoholism, one 36-year-old 78 The £1,000 crossword Get lots of petal power with a the compelling life story of woman developed liver disease Pit your wits against our USING NARS AND KEVIN MURPHY / MODEL: KIERA YASMEEN AT LENI’S MODELS / LOCATION: NORTH AUDLEY CANTINE, MAYFAIR (NACLONDON.CO.UK) MAYFAIR NORTH AUDLEY CANTINE, LENI’S MODELS / LOCATION: AT USING NARS AND KEVIN MURPHY / MODEL: KIERA YASMEEN COVER: STYLING: RIVKIE BAUM / PHOTOGRAPH: ROBERTO AGUILAR / STYLIST’S ASSISTANT: EMMA HAWKINS / HAIR AND MAKE-UP: DANIELLE HOOK / HAIR AND MAKE-UP: DANIELLE EMMA HAWKINS / STYLIST’S ASSISTANT: AGUILAR STYLING: RIVKIE BAUM / PHOTOGRAPH: ROBERTO COVER: masterclass in flower arrangement footballing legend Bert Trautman due to her diet of ready meals prize puzzle

Editor Margaret Hussey Art Director Greg Anderson Supplements Picture Editor Karen Vowles Picture Editor Sarah White On the cover: Trench coat, £55, La Production Editor Jan Brierley Features Editor Nicole Carmichael Lifestyle Director Victoria Gray Commissioning Editor and Redoute (0330 303 0199, laredoute. Beauty Editor Laura Mulley Fashion Editor Antonia Kraskowski Deputy Fashion Editor Rivkie Baum Literary Editor Charlotte Heathcote co.uk); jumper, £35.95, Mango (0800 Feature Writer Group Senior Fashion Assistant Group Fashion Assistant Kirsten Jones Abby McHale Katy Gale 026 0028, mango.com); earrings, £9.99, Chief Sub Editor Jennifer Wignall Sub Editors Bridget Rowan, Catrina Walker, Mia Bolton Junior Picture Researcher Maya Bedford Mango (0800 026 0028, mango.com) S Magazine is published by Express Newspapers, Second Floor, Northern & Shell Building, 10 Lower Thames Street, London EC3R 6EN. © Express Newspapers 2019

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 3 Get this!

There’s something for every budget in this week’s mustmust-have have selection CompiledC by Laura Mulley

LEADER OF THE PACK NOTE TO SELF Amber leather backpack, Memo pads, £2 IN THE BEST POSSIBLE TASTE £295, Kerikit each, Flying Chewable toys, £15 each, National Theatre Bookshop (0161 818 9038, Tiger (uk. (020 7452 3456, shop.nationaltheatre.org.uk) kerikit.com) flyingtiger.com)

JUST THE RISE AND TONIC SHINE Metropolitan Yes Studio Gin, £35.50, breakfast cup, Harvey Nichols £9, Wild & (020 7201 Wolf (01225 SCENTS OF OCCASION 8088, 789909, Scented candle, £40, Jonathan harveynichols. wildandwolf. Ward (jonathanward.me) com) co.uk)

BLINGING UP BABY Mima Xari pushchair in champagne, £1,139, Cheeky Rascals POT LUCK (01730 Hand-painted plant pot BOXING CLEVER SHINING EXAMPLE 895761, (plant not included), cheeky Gift box, from £26, Build My Gift from £45, Pow Pots Bag, £150, Dune London (020 rascals.co.uk) (buildmygift.com) (powpots.co.uk) 7258 3605, dunelondon.com)

4 SMAGS MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 HELPING HANDS Oven gloves, £37, Wilful Ink (www. wilfulink.com)

TIME TO SHINE CRUMBS OF COMFORT PICK OF THE BUNCH Dyberg Larsen Haipot pendant BiscuitandCrumb box of five Secret Garden bouquet, £6, Lidl light, £135.50, Lime Lace personalised biscuits, £17, (0800 977 7766, lidl.co.uk) (01423 900522, limelace.co.uk) Etsy (etsy.com)

GOING UNDERGROUND SISTER ACT LOOP THE LOOP Mugs, £10 each, London Transport The Sisterhood special editions Earrings, £12.50, Next Museum Shop (020 7565 7298, of Penguin Classics, £7.99 (0333 777 8000, next.co.uk) ltmuseumshop.co.uk) each, Bookshop (see page 77)

WILD GOOSE CHASE MOTHER OF ALL BAGS Set of four geese teaspoons, Beauty bag by Selfish Mother founder £20.95, Annabel James (0345 Molly Gunn, £50, Space NK (spacenk. 548 0210, annabeljames.co.uk) com) – £5 goes to the Refuge charity

FANCY A CUPPA? SITTING PRETTY TWINKLE TOES Loose tea tins, from £9.95 each, Salsa set of two garden chairs, Heels, £19, George at Asda (0800 Fortnum & Mason (020 7734 £140, John Lewis & Partners 952 3003, direct.asda.com) 8040, fortnumandmason.com) (03456 049049, johnlewis.com)

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 5

first look by Kirsten Jones DO ASK Italian has a tasty treat lined up for you and your mum to celebrate Mother’s Day. Three restaurants in London, Leeds and Liverpool are hosting Edible Bouquet masterclasses in partnership with florist Rebel Rebel. Make your mum a La Dolce Vita bouquet with edible ingredients and tuck into a three-course set menu including TAK E PART pea and ricotta souffle and warm cookie and salted caramel Lace up your running shoes and bring a friend to the starting line gelato. The two-hour masterclass at Double Dash in London’s Regent’s Park. The event on May 11 begins in London on Tuesday, is a 5k with a difference, created by the Royal National Institute followed by Leeds on Wednesday of Blind People (RNIB) to raise money and help break down barriers and Liverpool on Thursday. for people with sight loss. Grab a tether and pair up to run with a Tickets cost £19.95. Book friend, just like many blind and partially sighted people who run with at eventbrite.co.uk. a guide. Sign up online at rnib.org.uk/doubledash. GO TO TRY Rory Bremner and Rob Rouse If you fancy sumptuous team up to kick off the 11th dining in a luxurious annual Bath Comedy Festival. setting, head to the From Tuesday until April 14, the Albatross & Albert Somerset city will welcome in Manchester’s 300 comedians to perform at Spinningfields. The more than 150 events. See restaurant has riverside stand-up and musical comedy views and oozes with The Vogueabonds on opulence with a huge polished oak and brass bar, lavish velvet furniture Saturday, enjoy An Evening and a stunning golf ball light installation suspended above the bar. With Eric & Ern on April 4 We tried the tasting menu which showcases seasonal ingredients and sign up for an immersive and includes seven courses exquisitely paired with delicious wines. Wine Arts Trail with panto king Our favourites were the pheasant breast with bread sauce and mulled Christopher Biggins. Book wine, the cod cheeks and the roast beef with sage bread and butter tickets at bathcomedy.com. pudding. Call 0161 325 4444 or visit albatrossandarnold.uk.com.

MUST HAVE Enjoy a Dumbo remake, watch a family drama and sing along with Michael Ball

Dumbo Coming Home To You Wildlife Tim Burton puts his stamp Theatre star Michael When his dad leaves home on this much-loved Disney Ball’s latest album has a to fight a forest fire out of classic. Once a laughing sprinkling of self-penned town, Joe and his mum are stock, a newborn flying tracks and covers of his left to fend for themselves. elephant helps save a favourite hits by Elvis Forced into adulthood, Joe struggling circus. With Presley, Dolly Parton watches on as his mother Danny DeVito, the live and Cliff Richard. Tracks fails to stay afloat. Starring action remake is in include I Miss You Nights and Love Is Like A Jake Gyllenhaal, it’s out on cinemas from Friday. Butterfly. It’s out now for £10.99. Blu-ray and DVD now.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 7 Right: Dress, £58; shoes, £38, both Oasis (oasis- stores.com)

From top left: Scarf, £75, LK Bennett (020 7033 8333, lkbennett.com)

Earrings, £8.50, Miss Selfridge (0344 984 0263, missselfridge.com)

Green dress, £69, & Other stories (stories.com) Spot Navy midiskirt, £25, Marks & Spencer (0333 014 8000, marksandspencer.com) the difference Pink midiskirt, £35, Topshop (0344 984 Go dotty for this season’s 0264, topshop.com) hottest print Compiled by Katy Gale From bottom left: Cream top, £110, Ganni (ganni.com)

Bag, £22.50, Accessorize (020 3372 3050, accessorize.com)

Navy jumpsuit, £20, New Look (0344 499 6690, newlook.com)

Headband, £6, Evans (0344 984 0262, evans.co.uk)

Shoes, £179.99, Madeleine (0333 400 0400, madeleine.co.uk)

Lime dress, £49.99, Mango (0800 026 0028, mango.com)

Burgundy trousers, £22, Dorothy Perkins (0344 984 0261, dorothyperkins.com)

8 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 FOCUS

9 Tailor your look with chic tweeds, sleek styling and pastel shades Styling by Rivkie Baum Photographs by Roberto Aguilar

Left: Multi-tweed jacket, £350, LK Bennett (0333 577 9900, lkbennett.com); metallic top, £35.99, Mango (0800 026 0028, mango.com); pleated skirt, £105, Anonyme (anonyme. it); earrings, £12, River Island (0344 576 6444, riverisland.com)

Right: Crop jacket, £149, Fenn Wright Manson (020 7697 2801, fennwrightmanson. com); jumpsuit, £55, Roman (romanoriginals. co.uk); check shoes, £175; tweed bag, £195, LK Bennett (as before); earrings, £12.99, Mango (as before); necklace, £95, Lola Rose (020 7372 0777, lolarose.co.uk)

10 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 FASHION

A cut above

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 11 12 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 FASHION Left: Shirt, £24.90, Uniqlo (uniqlo.com); trousers, £33, La Redoute (0330 303 0199, laredoute.co. uk); heels, £22.99; clutch, £9.99, both New Look (0344 499 6690, newlook. com); earrings, £10, Miss Selfridge (0344 984 0263, missselfridge.com); small bracelet, from £35; chunky bracelet, £75, both Lola Rose (020 7372 0777, lolarose.co.uk)

Right: Linen jacket, £110; trousers, £165, both Jaeger (0292 010 1432, jaeger.co.uk); jumper, £139.95, Scotch & Soda (020 3868 0496, scotch-soda.com); brogues, £189, Rogue Matilda (roguematilda.com); earrings, £6.99, New Look (as before); necklace, £195, Lola Rose (as before)

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 13

FASHION

Left: Jacket, £36; skirt, £65, both Topshop (0344 984 0264, topshop.com); blouse, £23, La Redoute (0330 303 0199, laredoute.co.uk); heels, £85, Dune London (0333 240 7306, dunelondon.com); earrings, £10, River Island (0344 576 6444, riverisland.com)

Above: Jacket, £140; trousers, £80, both French Connection (0333 400 3285, frenchconnection.com); shirt, £59, Marks & Spencer (0333 014 8555, marksandspencer.com); bag, £265, LK Bennett (0333 577 9900, lkbennett.com); hoops, £4, Miss Selfridge (0344 984 0263, missselfridge.com); ring, £140, Lola Rose (020 7372 0777, lolarose.co.uk)

Stylist’s assistant: Emma Hawkins Hair and make-up: Danielle Hooker using NARS and Kevin Murphy Model: Kiera Yasmeen at Leni’s Models Photographer’s assistant: Neda Kozel Location: North Audley Cantine or NAC is a stylish bistro and cocktail lounge in London’s Mayfair serving up French sharing plates and crafted drinks in a plush setting of powder-pink walls and emerald- green booths. It’s a perfect post-shopping pitstop. For more information, see naclondon.co.uk

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 15

Laura Mulley Soap stars

Lather up with lovely bubbly bars instead of liquid handwash – and save the environment, says our expert

hanks to the recent types may still find them a little too awareness of the impact harsh, however, and so should stick on the environment of to balms, creams and oils. T plastic and a general You can also use something solid public desire to do to wash and condition your hair. something about it, customers are There are a few shampoo bars switching from liquid soaps (most beginning to creep on to the people don’t realise that the market, but at the moment none do metal spring found inside almost them quite as well – or in such a all pumps renders them unable to huge array – as Lush. They’re be recycled) back to good old bars packed full of natural ingredients, for the source of their bubbles. last as long as three bottles of But if you’re imagining regular shampoo and, being Lush, unpleasant past experiences of have fragrances that are hard to slimy blocks sticking to the basin ignore. Store them in one of their before fading away into a slither little round tins if you’re worried that gets stuck in the plughole, about mess or want to take them don’t worry, soaps have seriously on your travels. The action takes a stepped up a gear nowadays. In little getting used to (work them pretty packaging and perfume- between your hands first to create quality fragrances, they make lovely, enough lather), but I have friends ready-wrapped gifts, with formulas who now won’t go back to using that produce creamy lathers that liquid products on their locks. ●S won’t strip the skin. Even high-end skincare brands Clockwise, from left: are getting on board, formulating Aveda Rosemary Mint Bath Bar gentle cleansers in solid form. (£14; aveda.co.uk) Don’t think about cutting corners Roger & Gallet Hand Soap and just using your regular hand in Fleur D’Osmanthus (£6.50; soap to wash your face, though, Marks & Spencer) these typically have a pH level of Dr Bronner’s Pure-Castile Bar around nine (the skin’s pH sits Soap (£4.99; drbronner.co.uk) somewhere between 4.5 and 5.5) Drunk Elephant Juju Bar (£24; and are far too drying for use spacenk.com) above the neckline. Malin+Goetz Rum Bar Soap (£14; Gallinée’s cleansing bar contains malinandgoetz.co.uk) pre- and probiotics to preserve the Gallinée Cleansing Bar (£10; skin’s natural microbiome, while gallinee.com) Drunk Elephant’s combination of Lush Jason and the Argan Oil thermal mud and bamboo powder Shampoo Bar (£7.50; uk.lush.com) deeply cleanses and exfoliates L’Occitane Herbae Par L’Occitane

PHOTOGRAPH: MEGAN BRAMLEY / HENLEY ICE TILE, FROM £9.10 PER TILE, TOPPS TILES (TOPPSTILES.CO.UK) £9.10 PER TILE, FROM PHOTOGRAPH: MEGAN BRAMLEY / HENLEY ICE TILE, oilier complexions. Very dry skin Soap (£6; uk.loccitane.com)

18 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 19

CounterBeauty Edited by Laura Mulley

We’ve seen vitamins A, C and E become staple skincare ingredients, but Perricone MD has looked further down the alphabet for its Essential Fx Collection (from £79; perriconemd.com), which combines moisture-locking, nourishing vitamin F with the antioxidant acyl- glutathione. Ideal for dry skin, the range of serums, moisturisers and eye creams help to plump and hydrate the skin, reducing the appearance of wrinkles and creases.

Zingy, fresh and floral, colourful Cactus Blossom is The Body Shop’s newest One of the collection, made with cactus flower newest niche extract sourced from Morocco. It’s fragrance brands available in five individual body to launch in the products plus the Cactus Blossom UK, Kierin NYC Gift Set (£12; thebodyshop.com), Eau de Parfums which contains a shower (£65 each; asos. gel, body yoghurt (lighter com) is inspired in consistency than its by the people famous body butters) and and the stories of its a bath lily, and would hometown, New York City. make a lovely gift for The four perfumes come Mother’s Day. with colourful artwork and compelling names, from 10am Flirt, a clean, green combination, to Sunday Brunch, an uplifting concoction of bergamot, lemon and Earl Grey tea.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 21 Life as I know it Jack Savoretti Singer Jack, 35, is married to actress Jemma Powell. They have two children and live in Oxfordshire

Not a lot of people know this but around so any opportunity I get to of the cover of these two cool I’m very good at... cooking. It sit at a dinner table at home with dudes and it ended up being a might be to do with my Italian them is the ultimate for me. phenomenal record. Since then I heritage but it’s something I love I’d like to say sorry to… my always judge an album by its cover. to do. My speciality is pasta parents for me deciding to do It’s not good for my image but amatriciana, a Roman dish where something that probably gave I like... crying at sentimental you use the cheek of a pig in them many sleepless nights. It’s TV shows like This Is Us. tomato sauce. It’s something else. working out but there were many My greatest weakness is... My best friends are… my dogs. years where I can guarantee they pasta. I have to have some type I have three dogs and there’s a weren’t sleeping so well. of pasta at least once a day lot to be said about having best My first kiss was... with a girl otherwise I get moody. Maybe I friends that can’t answer back. named Vanessa when I was 10 or don’t look like someone who eats My nickname is… Papa. 11. I’d just moved to Switzerland a lot of pasta yet, but I will do. Everybody at home calls me Papa and was at a school where When you’re moving around a because of my kids. My wife calls everyone spoke Italian except me lot of pasta is fine but when you me Papa. Even my mum calls me and she was very kind and sweet. stop and chill out it all shows. It’s Papa. I like it, even if it does make The one thing I’d change about waiting for me around the corner. me sound like an old Mafia boss. myself is… I’d be more patient. If I could pass any law I would... The bravest thing I’ve ever done I think patience is the key to decriminalise marijuana for is… proposing to my wife and success and happiness and medical reasons. I’ve seen hoping I’d live up to what I was I wish I had more of it. people suffer from things that promising. It was pretty terrifying The best thing my parents could be very much avoided if and it was possible she wouldn’t taught me was… that parenting they’d had access to it. have said yes because at the is endless, unrelenting love. The I drive... an Audi Q7 e-tron, which time I asked her we weren’t really one thing I was never short of is their first electric hybrid car speaking, but thank God she did. growing up was love. and I feel very spoilt every time My favourite TV show is… Mad The last time I cried was… when I get into it. The fact that a car of Men. I like the complexity of I watched the film Life Itself, that size and comfort is electric every character and the fact that which is by Dan Fogelman, the is incredible. although a lot of it is about Don creator of This Is Us. I was a The shop I can’t walk past is… Draper it doesn’t focus on just mess. I cry when I watch any any furniture shop. If I’m one character and they’re so episode of This Is Us and what anywhere in the world and I see a multi-layered. Just when you think I like about his writing is that it furniture shop I have to go in and you’ve sussed someone out they isn’t afraid of sentimentality. see lamps, chairs and tables, show you something different. We’re all so proud of talking especially if it’s antique furniture. Usually in TV shows characters about how bad we feel that we Most of the furniture in our house stay the same for the duration. seem to be ashamed of saying is random benches, stools and My perfect evening is... being at how happy and loved we feel. stuff like that which I’ve bought home with my kids and my wife, The first record I ever bought and had shipped home. which might sound boring and was… an album called Talking The most expensive thing I’ve clichéd but it’s true. I travel so Timbuktu by Ali Farka Toure and ever splashed out on is… all of much and am always bouncing Ry Cooder. I bought it because that antique furniture, although WORDS: SIMON BUTTON / PHOTOGRAPH: CHRIS FLOYD SIMON BUTTON / PHOTOGRAPH: CHRIS FLOYD WORDS:

22 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 I was in Marrakech and it was cheaper to fly there, buy rugs and tables and ship them back than it is buying them here. The person who’d play me in a film is… probably Gael García Bernal. I’ve been mistaken for him a few times. A girl once thought I was him and asked me to sign an autograph, and the more I kept saying I wasn’t him the more she insisted I was so I ended up signing my name as Gael García Bernal. The worst job I’ve done is… chopping onions and frying falafels at a shop in Shepherd’s Bush. I ended up eating falafels every day and smelling of onions and fried food. There’s no amount of showers you can take to get rid of that smell. My perfect Sunday is... getting the Sunday papers, making a nice roast, taking the dogs for a walk, then sitting by the fireplace with the family. My favourite place in Britain is... Oxfordshire. Moving out to the English countryside was the best decision I ever made. I didn’t realise how much I wasn’t a city boy until I left London. My last holiday was… in Rome. It wasn’t really a holiday as I was making the new album but it’s impossible not to experience the magic of Rome when you’re there. The minute you get in a taxi you’re slapped in the face with the Roman way of life. I’m currently reading... a biography about Pier Paolo Pasolini, a writer, director, poet “I didn’t and actor in Italy in the 1960s, and a fascinating character. The best day of my life was… realise There are three days – my daughter Connie being born, my I wasn’t son Winter being born and Italy winning the World Cup in 2006. If I had half an hour left on a city boy Earth I’d… be with my wife and kids by the sea in the until I left Mediterranean. ●S Jack’s album Singing To Strangers London” is out now. His European tour starts next month. For details, go to jacksavoretti.com.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 23 Wonder woman From singer and presenter to author of children’s superhero books, Alesha Dixon is penning a new chapter, as she tells Angela Wintle

rom her chiselled cheekbones to ethnicity should be able to pick up a book ignoring a huge part of society any more. No her long, toned legs, Alesha Dixon and see themselves reflected in its pages. one can ever say again that black people can’t is so physically striking it’s easy “If I can be the person who ticks that box sell movies, books or records.” F to underestimate her. Her looks and for a certain demographic then that’s a great And Alesha should know. When she was edgy fashion sense may dominate thing,” says Alesha. starting out with British girl group Mis-Teeq in the headlines, but she’s also whip-smart and Her greatest reward, though, has been the the late 1990s, a record label executive told unflappable. It’s no accident that she has reaction of parents who have written to say her their manager black girls wouldn’t sell records been a perennial face on prime-time television books have encouraged their child to read for – before the trio went on to enjoy huge success for a decade. the first time. Alesha has also relished meeting with three double-platinum albums. Nevertheless, Alesha is full of surprises. her young readers. Those unenlightened times may be over, but Having already proved herself as a successful “School visits are one of my favourite things the fact that ethnicity remains a subject for recording artist, presenter and businesswoman, to do,” she smiles. “I even got the chance to debate underlines the fact there is still work she has now penned the third in a series of go into my daughter’s primary school, although to do, she insists. So does she think the bestselling children’s books about Aurora it was a bit strange for her to see Mummy negativity channelled towards the Duchess of Beam, an ordinary schoolgirl with extraordinary standing up in front of the class. It’s lovely Sussex has been motivated by racial prejudice, superpowers. And, like Alesha, Aurora happens when children ask about my characters, what’s whether consciously or unconsciously? to be mixed race. The books were an instant going to happen next or what inspired me to “I may be naive, but actually that wasn’t my hit when they launched last year. So much so write the books. first thought,” she shrugs. “The reality is when that the first in the series, Lightning Girl, was “When I visit secondary schools I get the you’re that famous you’re inevitably going to one of the biggest-selling middle-grade UK chance to explore meatier subjects, whether attract negative comment. I also believe that publishing debuts. it’s bullying, teenage insecurities or the fear of women in general are more of a target. Alesha came up with the idea for Aurora standing out from the crowd. Children often tell “When I first got the call to do Britain’s Got after reading aloud to her five-year-old daughter, me they feel unsure or confused and I feel it’s Talent, Amanda Holden suggested we went for Azura, and realising there was a hole in the my job in those moments to encourage them a coffee and we made a pact. We agreed that market. “Not only did I think about the to recognise that they have something unique the media would try to pit us against each characters my daughter reads, I also thought to offer. They don’t have to be like their peers other but we wanted to be responsible role back to my own childhood and I didn’t read or compromise who they are. Being who they models for women. From day one, we’ve had about a single mixed-race girl,” she says. are is good enough.” each other’s backs and become really good “At the time it didn’t even seem abnormal. Fortuitously, her first book coincided with the friends. Thankfully, the negative coverage only I’d read my Roald Dahl and Enid Blyton and release of the Marvel film Black Panther, which lasted for my first series on the show and didn’t even consider it. It wasn’t until I saw also featured a black superhero. Does she that’s because our actions spoke louder than Neneh Cherry performing on Top Of The Pops think this reflects a change in the way people any petty stories.” when I was nine that I remember turning to of colour are represented in the arts? Nevertheless, Alesha has had her own inner my mum and saying, ‘Oh my goodness, there “Absolutely. It took Marvel films to produce voices to contend with and admits she sobbed are people on television who look like me.’” In a black superhero movie on that scale for for two weeks as her 40th birthday approached this day and age, she argues, children of any the world to wake up. You can’t get away with last October. PHOTOGRAPHS: PA IMAGES / INSTAGRAM / JOHN WRIGHT GETTY IMAGES / INSTAGRAM IMAGES PHOTOGRAPHS: PA

24 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 INTERVIEW

“I hope I’m grounded enough to stop vanity and ego running my life”

25

INTERVIEW

Clockwise, from top left: BGT team Amanda Holden, Alesha, Ant McPartlin, David Walliams, Declan Donnelly and Simon Cowell; Alesha with character Aurora Beam; Alesha and her partner Azuka Ononye; Alesha with her daughter Azura

“I was definitely not in the best place,” she because the show has been commissioned for she doesn’t follow a strict gym regime and confesses. “Although it’s funny looking back, a second series. “By the final, we were neck even allows herself the odd foodie treat. because I’m usually the most positive person and neck with ITV’s The Voice, an established “I’m a pescatarian who lives quite a vegan I know. I think it was the realisation that life show,” she says. “The BBC is over the moon lifestyle. I’ve given up chocolate but if I fancy flashes past so quickly. I remember turning and we can only get better from here.” a vegan pizza I’ll eat one. I’m not one of those 30 like it was yesterday.” It says a lot that the BBC chose Alesha to people who thinks I can’t eat that doughnut. I’ll As she enters her fifth decade, does she host this new, untested format, although she say to myself, ‘No, I’ll eat the doughnut and worry about ageing and the pressures on older wasn’t fazed by the weight of expectation or then find a dress to fit around it.’ At the same women in television? the pressures of live TV. “I actually like the fact time, I listen to my body. If I’m feeling sluggish, “No, it’s a waste of energy. I also hope I’m that things go wrong. That’s entertaining in I know I have to up my fruit and veg intake.” grounded enough to stop vanity and ego itself. And as I told my co-host, Jordan Banjo, She’s protective of her private life and running my life. You have to own the age you it’s only telly.” declines to talk about her plans (or otherwise) are and not see it as a hindrance. My attitude She is gearing up for the latest series of for more children with long-term partner, is, with all the experience I have, I’ll do even Britain’s Got Talent next month, which will see choreographer Azuka Ononye. Away from the better. I have so many unfulfilled ambitions the return of Ant McPartlin after a troubled year spotlight, at home in Hertfordshire, she likes and there’s a part of me that feels quite in which he has tackled his messy divorce and nothing more than walking her four dogs in the unsatisfied creatively. a drink-driving conviction. This subject is strictly woods. “I like being in the now. When you work “I have all these brilliant jobs so I don’t off limits, although Alesha is happy to talk about in this crazy industry, all you want to do in your like to moan, but I really miss being on stage. the crèche-like vibe behind the scenes now all downtime is nothing.” I’d love to get back into the recording studio the show’s judges have become parents. As far as her professional life is concerned, and work on music, because that’s what “When I started, the judges’ room was so however, she is more open to new adventures really satisfies my soul. I’d also love to act quiet you could hear a pin drop. Now, we’ve got than ever. “Ultimately, it’s all about attitude,” in a movie.” kids running around, dogs running around... but she says. “You can be your own worst enemy In the meantime, her TV schedule keeps her it’s more a reflection of the family nature of the and say I’m 40, my career’s over. But my take more than occupied. She was delighted when show,” she says. on it is, I’m 40, I’m empowered and I’m about 14-year-old Ellie Ferguson won the first series As usual, all eyes will be on Alesha and to enter the best part of my life.” ●S of the BBC’s latest talent vehicle, The Greatest Amanda’s outfits. “Whenever Simon Cowell Dancer, particularly as she was the shyest looks appalled and asks me what I’m wearing Secret Supervillain Vs Lightning Girl by contestant and the only solo performer. It I give a little cheer because it means I’ve got Alesha Dixon (Scholastic, £6.99), is out now in marked a personal triumph for Alesha, too, my outfit right,” she jokes. She maintains that paperback. See Express Bookshop on page 77.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 27 Actor David Kross is on the ball in a new biopic about Manchester City’s legendary goalie Bert Trautmann Words by Kirsten Jones

t the age of 16 David Kross landed his breakthrough role in acclaimed movie The Reader and at 18 was filmingA intimate sex sceneswith Hollywood superstar Kate Winslet. The Reader is not a movie he is likely to forget. Fresh out of school, the German actor was picked to play Michael Berg, a teenager who falls for an older woman and later discovers she has committed terrible war crimes. “Me, a German actor just starting out, suddenly had to do intimate scenes with Kate as my partner,” he recalls. “Sex scenes are like a choreography, in a way. The weirdest moment was lying on the bed with the camera in my face. The assistant director moved the bed about. It was the hardest thing, just acting with my face.” David, now 28, won an award for his role and launched into a flourishing career of successful German and international movies such as Krabat, War Horse and My Brother Simple – his biggest challenge to date, he says. “I played a mentally challenged boy called Barnabas, aka Simple, who is cared for by his brother Ben through good times and bad. It was an amazing journey to play such a role,” David says. The actor, who lives in Berlin, is currently working on Netflix’s first German film, but The Keeper A league is his feature of the year and his biggest break in British movies since The Reader. Out next month, The Keeper tells the tale of Bert Trautmann, the Second World War German paratrooper who became the legendary goalkeeper of of his own

PHOTOGRAPHS: GETTY IMAGES / AIDAN MONAGHAN / ZEPHYR FILMS TRUTMANN LTD MONAGHAN / AIDAN PHOTOGRAPHS: GETTY IMAGES Manchester City Football Club.

28 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 INTERVIEW

It’s a true story, told with a little through this love story,” the actor artistic license, that follows Bert’s explains. “Bert and Margaret life from a Lancashire prisoner slowly open up to each other and of war camp to the heights of prove you can deal with traumas footballing fame. Bert won over in the sense of love or empathy. City fans and played on with They were there for each other.” a broken neck to help his Despite its darkness, the film Bert Trautmann team win the 1956 also contains bright and uplifting makes a save in a FA Cup final. scenes, carried by John Henshaw 1956 game against “His “I was amazed (Born And Bred), who plays Tottenham Hotspur that I hadn’t Margaret’s father Jack, the story tells so heard Bert’s manager of the local football team name before,” who recognises Bert’s talent. much about David Behind the scenes David confesses. brushed up on his goalkeeping tolerance and “His story skills and reignited his childhood tells so passion for the game. After the power of much about a bit of training from a coach in reconciliation, Germany – and many hours in the football” about tolerance gym – he was ready to play. and empathy “I’d never stood in goal before towards people without this movie,” he admits. “I began any prejudice and about the playing football at five years old power of football. I wanted to be and joined a club in north Germany. David Kross and Freya part of the film after the very Like every young boy I had the Mavor in The Keeper first minute.” dream of becoming a football pro. as Bert and Margaret At the centre of the story is It was that or become an actor. Bert’s love affair with local girl The acting actually worked out and Margaret Friar. After a frosty start, now I have been able to combine War Horse In with the two warmed to each other, the two things I love.” Leonard Carow fell in love and fought against Since shooting to fame as a prejudice and personal tragedy teenager, David has worked with to forge a happy life together. The acclaimed actors and directors love story is an important part of like Steven Spielberg. His first the film for David, who had no leading role was in 2006 German problem creating a connection movie Tough Enough. with actress Freya Mavor. “I have “Tough Enough was my first big to say I was very lucky,” he says. part but it was on The Reader that “She is such an amazing actress.” I learnt more about how to prepare The actors had their work cut for a role and to know everything out from day one as the first scene about the period the film is set they played together, seen later in in,” David says. “That enables you the film, is set just after the death to tell the story.” of Bert and Margaret’s son. And it is a movie’s storyline that “They are lying in bed trying to means the most to David. All his films carry a powerful message, David and Kate kiss each other and have some which is not something that has Winslet in The Reader sort of physical connection but their grief is too strong. We really happened by accident. jumped into it and after that we “I choose the roles that tell me had the whole story in our hands,” something. They have to make me David reveals. want to be part of the story,” he Trauma plays a big part in The explains. “The Keeper shares an Keeper, from the death of the essence of Bert’s story. I didn’t Trautmanns’ son to the effects of get to meet him, as he passed war, seen through the eyes of the away in 2013, but I wanted to British people and those who make the best film we could to fought, both friend and foe. Bert keep telling his great tale. is haunted by what he saw during “It should not be forgotten, the war but struggles to talk about what he experienced.” ●S his experiences. “We wanted to show the The Keeper is in cinemas from difficulties of talking about trauma April 5.

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Edited by Laura Mulley

Hit cruise control on the picturesque river Danube ootling down the serene river Danube flanked by the stunning vineyards of Austria’s Wachau Valley, P could, quite possibly, be the perfect way to travel. As the sun’s winter rays provided warming sunshine and mugs of rich hot chocolate took the edge off any chill in the air, my husband and I agreed this was so much more civilised than a fly-and-flop winter sun holiday. If you like the idea of a cruise but hate the thought of being on a huge ship with hundreds of chatty passengers, river cruising may be the perfect solution. You get all the convenience of a big ship cruise – transfers from home, luxurious and well-equipped staterooms (cabins), a gym, Jacuzzi, lounges and restaurants – but with a maximum capacity of 130 passengers, it never feels crowded. There’s also a refreshingly down-to-earth feel to it all – none of that “cruise-upmanship” Go with the flow that you often hear bandied about at muster stations on big ships. Plus – and this is a real bonus – you arrive right into the heart interest – some that we were familiar with, spend a couple of days in each of the bigger of your destination, so you can maximise your such as Bratislava and Vienna and some that cities, transferring to the InterContinental time at any stop. we would never have thought to visit, such as hotel in Prague for the final destination. There are several river cruise operators, Dürnstein and Deggendorf, but were so glad It’s the perfect amount of time to get a flavour but Avalon Waterways definitely has the that we did. Tiny villages with fairy-tale castles of each place and you can either join in one edge, thanks to the innovative design onboard and the prettiest churches for a morning here, of the organised walking tours or explore boats such as the Avalon Panorama. Floor-to- an afternoon there and longer trips such as a at your own speed. As with other cruises, ceiling windows in the staterooms can be fully day in Linz, where some of us transferred to clientele may be older than, say, a package opened so that your whole room acts as a Salzburg for a Sound Of Music experience. tour, but with more active options onboard giant balcony. You can watch the world go by Want to recreate the Do-Re-Mi steps scene in such as mountain bikes and kayaks at your as you lie on the (incredibly comfortable) beds lederhosen made of curtaining? Yup, you can. disposal, river cruising is attracting younger angled towards the window. As views go, it And you still have time to dine on genuine holidaymakers. And once you have had a takes some beating. Wiener schnitzel, followed by Salzburger flavour, you too may find you’re hooked. We took a cruise from Budapest to Prague, Nockerl, a soufflé-like dessert. Next stop, the Mekong Delta… ●S Nicole Carmichael GETTY IMAGES stopping along the way at various points of The nine-night trip is planned so that you

Above: Pretty Melk Abbey, Austria. From left: Dürnstein; Bratislava and typical German fare

Avalon’s 10-day Danube Dreams – Budapest to Prague starts at £2,216 per person, based on departure dates from May to October 2019. The price includes return flights from London Heathrow, complimentary Wi-Fi, gratuities, shore excursions at every port led by certified guides and private home pick-up. Call 0330 058 8291 or visit avaloncruises.co.uk. A European annual multi-trip budget policy from InsureandGo (insureandgo.co.uk) starts at £30.99 and includes 50 activities and sports as standard. Cruise cover in Europe starts at £17.92 for a week. S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 31 In the closet with Caroline Castigliano The dress designer has a passion for fashion with simple, classic lines Words and styling by Tricia Welch With a store in Knightsbridge, that for about three years. The Caroline is known for her exquisite most important consideration bridal and evening wear and is is the personality of the bride, renowned for understated glamour which we aim to personify through and clean, classic lines. Caroline, her gown so it’s the ultimate 58, who has dressed royalty and statement of her style. celebrities, lives in Surrey with her What is the secret of a red- husband and their four daughters. carpet gown? Whenever I dress How would you describe your someone for the red carpet, I style? Classic, simple and always insist they have a fitting, beautifully cut. so it’s perfect for their proportions. Which colours and shapes suit I work with Darcey Bussell in you best? I’m full busted with this way and she always looks a small frame so I avoid any form wonderful. She wore a lot of our of pattern or baggy styles. Tailored gowns for Strictly and is the cuts that skim my shape work perfect ambassador for us. best. As for colour, I suit muted Who is your favourite designer? tones and pastels – soft pinks, When I was younger I’d have said greens, creams, mochas. Dolce & Gabbana but now, for Which is your favourite fashion suits especially, Burberry and era? The 50s. Think Jackie O and Balmain which cut to flatter designer Oleg Cassini – simplistic a fuller bust. but such flattering styles. Which is your favourite high- What makes for a beautiful street shop? Zara – great for bridal gown? It’s all about the basics, classics with a twist architecture of the dress. The and always bang on trend. foundations have to be right for Do you have a style icon? Audrey the style to succeed. I always aim Hepburn and Grace Kelly. for a simplistic look which moves Are you a hoarder or do you clear beautifully, so when someone out your wardrobe each season? takes a video, the silhouette is I try to clear out as often as I can Caroline wears perfect from every angle. but I still wear clothes I bought her own design How important are bridal trends? 15 or 20 years ago because they black velvet I never compromise but it’s good were expensive and of fabulous cocktail dress to have a contemporary feel based quality. I have four daughters, with lace on a strong and classic theme. twins of 26, plus a 25 and a 21 sleeves and The big trend I’ve pioneered is the year old, and they are always pairs it with simplicity of the crepe dress, as borrowing from my wardrobe. suede heels epitomised by the gown Meghan Are you a fan of vintage? Yes, but from Buffalo Markle wore. We’ve been doing I have very little in my wardrobe, London

32 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 fashion

probably because I don’t have the Describe your wedding dress… time to search for it. I married 22 years ago, six weeks How many shoes and handbags after I had my youngest daughter do you own? I possess very few Belle, and wore a crepe sheath Above: Caroline often works out in handbags. For every day, I’ll use with a detachable satin-faced her home gym and is seen here in a one of my own leather tote bags. organza overskirt with a Chanel- top from Martha’s Vineyard, Sweaty I’m more fond of shoes and style bow. My older daughters Betty leggings and Nike trainers probably have over 100 pairs. were bridesmaids and wore cream What is your go-to work outfit? satin short-sleeve tops with ●●Clockwise, from top left: She bought Black Joseph wool stretch satin-faced organza skirts and this tweed jacket at Zara and the trousers (I’ve about 10 pairs) pale-yellow cummerbunds. My blue pea jacket from Marina Yachting plus a silk shirt with suede husband wore a day suit and tie. ●●Although Caroline prefers pastel over-the-knee boots. Do you have a favourite LBD? and muted tones, the LBD is an Is there an “old favourite” you Quite a few, most slightly above essential. This lace cocktail dress turn to in a wardrobe crisis? A the knee. Many I’ve made myself. is by Zimmermann, while the green black evening-style blazer with What is the item of clothing you frock with a pearl-encrusted bodice wn satin lapels with black cigarette can’t live without? J Brand jeans. is one of her own designs o pants, black Valentino pumps and What are your favourite pieces ●●A huge fan of structured Swarovski crystal jewellery. of jewellery? The pieces my tailoring, she bought this coat How much do you spend on husband has bought me, which from Marina Yachting clothes each month? I wouldn’t I wear every day, including the ●●Her favourite dainty heels are

have a clue. Perhaps £15,000 diamond stud earrings, a present by Valentino and Prada ade u sing Bo bbi B r a year. That doesn’t include the day Belle was born, my ●●This Art Deco-style silver bracelet cocktail dresses as I mostly wedding and engagement rings, was given to her by a friend, her wear my own designs. plus my Van Cleef & Arpels multicoloured bracelet was a gift What is the most expensive item Alhambra bracelet and Bulgari from her daughter Jessica, the in your wardrobe? And the best watch. All white gold or platinum. beaten silver earrings are by bargain? The most expensive is Which item of clothing would you Laurence Coste, the diamanté drops probably a coat which cost a save from a burning house? are by Maria Elena and the entwined couple of thousand. My evening Nothing. I’d just want to save my rings are Tiffany y / H air and ma k e -u p : Jul ia W dresses cost more but they don’t family and get out fast. ●S ●●This blue Italian Piene Fiore a count because I make them. As embossed leather holdall is for bargains, I don’t really do Caroline Castigliano’s Knightsbridge a Caroline Castigliano and the those. I can’t bear sales. Collection is available exclusively at Above: Caroline wears one of her designer’s preferred bag for every What is the oldest item in your her Knightsbridge store in London. typical work outfits: a blush-pink day use. Her pink clutch is by Jimmy wardrobe? A Versace skirt I got in For her bridal and evening wear, Vince shirt and black crepe Choo, while the black satin bag with the South of France 38 years ago. go to carolinecastigliano.com. the jewelled clasp is a Maria Elena trousers from Joseph P h oto graphs : G emma D

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 33 “I had liver disease and I didn’t even drink” Deborah Watson was 36 and newly married when she was told she might have only six months to live Words by Rachel Carlyle ike so many of us, Deborah or two drinks once a month,” says Watson associated liver Deb, now 38, from Sunderland. disease with alcoholism. “I had no idea that my weight She never dreamed it could have caused it.” could be caused by being Deb, who is 5ft 2ins, weighed Loverweight and by eating too 11 to 12st, was a size 14 to 16 many ready meals, and a diet rich and admits she lived on ready in processed food. meals, takeaways and instant In fact, cases of non-alcoholic snacks. “I worked shifts, so it was fatty liver disease (NAFLD) are a case of grab some food and go. the next and had no energy for confesses. “It was so much to growing alarmingly fast in the UK. I had no idea it was so unhealthy.” anything, which wasn’t like me. take in. The woman in the next It is thought as many as one in Deb first noticed problems Then one day he noticed the bed had the same thing and she four of us could be in the early about a year before her diagnosis whites of my eyes had turned didn’t drink, either.” stages of the disease which, in June 2017. “I was really yellow, almost luminous like On leaving hospital, Deb saw because it doesn’t have any struggling with my weight despite a cat’s eyes, so he phoned the a dietician and cut out processed symptoms, we are unaware of it. not eating any more than usual, NHS helpline and within two food and fizzy drinks, reduced her With obesity levels rising, experts and my abdomen was huge and hours I was on a ward.” salt intake, as she had high blood say, liver disease is the next big bloated. By my wedding in April There she was told her liver had pressure, and increased her health crisis. In 2020 NAFLD is 2017 I weighed 15½ stone and become so fatty and inflamed it consumption of vegetables, fruit expected to overtake alcohol had to really squeeze into my was no longer functioning properly and fish. “The way I look at it, I eat as the most common reason for wedding dress,” she says. “My and fluid had built up in her more colours now, fresh vegetables a liver transplant in the UK. doctor thought it was irritable abdomen. “He said if I did not like butternut squash, aubergine “When I was diagnosed, the first bowel syndrome but as the weeks change my lifestyle, in six months and courgette, plus two pieces thing I said to the doctor from my went on I felt more and more tired. I would either be dead or on the of fruit a day and fresh fish like hospital bed was that I certainly “I could be talking to my waiting list for a liver transplant. salmon. Before, my go-to veg were wasn’t an alcoholic. I only had one husband one minute and asleep I lay there in absolute shock,” Deb sweetcorn and carrots. The only

34 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 health

How to maintain a healthy liver Keeping your weight under control is key to good liver health but there are other things you can do to help matters. These include: ●●Take exercise. Regular aerobic exercise (the kind that makes you slightly out of breath like brisk walking, cycling or running) seems to have a positive effect on the liver as well as keeping weight under control. The Government advises 150 minutes exercise a week. ●●Drink coffee. Research shows drinking at least three cups a day can reduce the risk of developing liver cirrhosis and cancer. No one is sure why – it could be the antioxidants in coffee or because caffeine interacts with liver cells and improves insulin sensitivity, although decaffeinated coffee also has a reduced positive effect. ●●Don’t have an overweight mother. Studies suggest that obesity in pregnancy can make your child more prone to fatty liver, even if theirs is a model lifestyle. ●●Keep stress under control. People suffering from chronic stress or depression are at higher risk of NAFLD, although scientists aren’t yet sure why.

severe NAFLD and teenagers with undergo an ultrasound followed by cirrhosis who are heading towards referral to a specialist. liver failure. But the British Liver Trust wants About 25 per cent of us have us to be more proactive with our too much fat in our liver but it only liver health, especially if we’re becomes dangerous when it gets overweight. The charity runs Love inflamed (NASH or nonalcoholic Your Liver mobile clinics around steatohepatitis), which happens the UK and 80 per cent of the in three to five per cent of cases. 5,300 visitors have raised enough A quarter of those will suffer red flags to have a fibroscan, a significant scarring and cirrhosis, noninvasive test which measures which might require a transplant. the stiffness of the liver. “It doesn’t sound like a lot when “At least one in five people you’re talking about fractions of we see at the roadshow have fractions but because we are significant liver damage,” says starting out with such a vast Natasha North of the British Liver number, a quarter of the whole Trust. “People are surprised. They population with excess fat in the say I don’t even drink that much. liver, then we still end up with But they didn’t know that diet can a huge number,” says Prof have an effect on your liver. People Fallowfield. “Plus, we don’t yet say it’s a real wake-up call.” know who is most at risk of Deb’s doctors told her she could developing NASH, although there’s have died of liver failure. Now, Al amy no doubt the more obese you are she’s studying nutrition and says, fish I ate was battered and came you see a dramatic improvement the worse the risk is.” “It’s still hard to absorb what I’ve from the chip shop.” in the condition of your liver. It has But you don’t have to be among been through and I get tearful if Eight months later, Deb had lost great powers of regeneration.” the 26 per cent of UK adults I think about it. But I am now full six stone and even her doctors However, he is desperately classed as obese to get NAFLD. of optimism and ambition for my were surprised to find her liver worried about the unfolding NAFLD The 35 per cent of us who are life and I have a whole bucket list was pretty much back to normal. crisis. “We have a phenomenal overweight (a BMI of 25 to 30) can of things I want to do.” ●S “I was ecstatic and came home number of people who need to get it, too. There’s a strong link and cried bucket-loads. I told my be seen at my clinic but it’s the with type 2 diabetes, as most The Love Your Liver roadshow will husband, Alan, ‘I’m going to live. tip of the iceberg compared to the sufferers have NAFLD, and there be in London and Essex from today I beat the odds.’” number out there who don’t even are genetic factors at play, too, until Wednesday, Derry and Belfast As Deb discovered, the liver is know they have a problem. as some slender people also have from May 14 to 16, Preston, a forgiving organ considering what “It’s frightening to think of the condition. Blackburn, Oldham, Warrington we put it through, says consultant what’s coming down the line, At the moment NAFLD is usually and Birkenhead from May 18 to hepatologist Professor Jonathan especially with the alarming rates picked up during a blood test for 22 and in Scotland, Wales and Fallowfield at The University of of childhood obesity.” another condition, often type 2 southern England in the autumn. Edinburgh. “If you can lose around His colleagues have seen diabetes. If your liver enzyme For more and to take the online 10 per cent of your body weight children under the age of 10 with levels appear too high, you may test, see britishlivertrust.org.uk.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 35 Jane O’Gorman Our agony aunt gets to the heart of your relationship problems JANE O’GORMAN’S ADVICE LINES Do you have a sexual or emotional problem? Need to improve your I can’t work but my rich boyfriend won’t help relationship or sex life? Call these new phonelines for Jane O’Gorman’s I’ve broken my arm and as hurt. I always pay my debts and injured and hurting, physically and friendly, expert advice. a freelance decorator I’m unable don’t expect a free ride. During financially, but he isn’t there for NEW! Super sex to work. I’m relying on friends our last phone conversation he you. Of course he shouldn’t feel ✆ 0905 789 3410* and family to support me. My said, “Call me back when you’re obliged to give or lend you cash, NEW! Brilliant orgasms boyfriend is extremely wealthy fully functional.” Now I’ve no idea but what about a lovingly made ✆ 0905 789 3411* but has refused to give, or even what he’s doing or who he’s cup of tea or a bunch of daffodils? 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If she’s not prepared to Think very carefully before doing at home, yet she thinks I should compromise and fit in, I fear she anything rash. You need to as half-brothers or sisters or throw them out next year so she is not the one for you – or them. consider the emotional fallout upsetting information. Of course can move in. When I tell her my of any results you receive. If the some people take DNA tests for children will be in my life forever I’m not sure Dad man you call dad is your real health-screening issues. Just she calls me weak. This is father, will you be disappointed? make sure you safeguard your leading to friction between us. is my real father If it transpires your mother did own mental health, too. Your girlfriend must understand I am not convinced the man I call sleep with someone else, will Contact Jane at S Magazine, Second Floor, there is room in your heart for Dad is my real father. We have that send you off on a painful Northern & Shell Building, 10 Lower Thames Street, London EC3R 6EN or email jane. everyone. Where is a young man nothing in common and I haven’t search? There could be other [email protected]. Jane regrets that supposed to go when he can’t seen him in three years. Twice surprises in store, too, such she cannot reply personally to your letters. Sex matters Doctor, doctor My husband and I separated You need to be proactive in Dr Rosemary Leonard MBE is a GP with many years’ in September but both live in getting this sorted out. Start experience working in London’s top teaching hospitals the same house as we are divorce proceedings, speak Can anything be done about weren’t previously a problem. struggling to sell it. I don’t to your estate agent about sensitive skin? A lot of Using an unperfumed have anyone new and neither adjusting the house price or perfumes bring me out in moisturising cream daily can does he and he expects to call in another company. Tell a rash and I can’t use plasters. help but there is nothing you have sex with me even though your husband having sex with Tiny glands produce natural oils can do about the sensitivity. Try we sleep apart. He makes me him is not like going to the gym that keep skin moist and create different types of plaster and if feel unreasonable for turning and won’t be happening again. a protective barrier. With age, you have a reaction apply a one him down when we’re still Does he need to get a paying the production of these oils per cent hydrocortisone cream. technically married and argues lodger while you stay with a decreases, which is particularly Contact Dr Leonard at S Magazine, it’s just a physical act that friend? He has to understand noticeable after the menopause. Sunday Express, Second Floor, Northern and Shell Building, 10 Lower Thames relieves pressure and does us that he can’t push you around The skin feels more dry and the Street, London EC3R 6EN, or email dr. good, like going to the gym. any more. No means no and lack of an oily barrier means it [email protected]. Dr Leonard But I want to move on. How do the police will become involved can become more sensitive regrets that she cannot reply personally to letters. Read her column every Tuesday in I make him understand that? if he doesn’t get that. and react to substances that the Daily Express. PHOTOGRAPH: RCD1

36 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 ADVERTISEMENT FEATURE Getting the glow Book in for a FREE A few simple changes skin consultation can get you out of your skincare routine rut with LloydsPharmacy ad skin days aren’t just for teenagers, they’re something we can all experience – at any age – especially after winter. Even if you think you know yourself well it can be tricky to decide exactly what type of Bskin you have – whether it’s oily, dry, combination or sensitive – and what will suit it best. Having healthy skin can be a real confidence booster and just a few simple changes can ease you out of a regime rut and into glowing, great-looking skin. Start by having a make-up bag sort-out because it’s easy to take what’s in there for granted and not give it the TLC it needs. Remember that make-up brushes come into contact with your face most days so keeping brushes clean is as important as having a regular cleansing routine for your skin. Your make-up brushes come into contact is a good idea. Everything our body does sebum and temperature – which can help with lots of surfaces every day in your make-up depends on it, but healthy skin is definitely high you to answer any questions you might bag, on a dressing table – or at the bottom of up the list. have about your skin. your handbag. Skin cells are largely made up of water but LloydsPharmacy healthcare experts can use It’s here that they may pick up bacteria that they’re actually the last part of us that water the results to suggest what you can do to can be transferred to your skin and even into the reaches when we drink so our skin can easily improve your skin and advice about products and make-up itself, which can cause spots. So, try to become dehydrated which results in dryness, treatments that are tailored to your skin type – clean your make-up brushes at least once a tightness or flaking. helping to cleanse, tone, treat and moisturise it. week to keep bacteria to a minimum and throw When skin dries out it tends to become less And if you’re worried about anything – from out any make-up that’s past its expiration date. resilient and more prone to wrinkles, so a really ageing to sun damage – they’re on hand to give There are two golden rules for make-up itself: good way to keep fine lines at bay is by making you reassurance and tips that will set you on the go easy with it on a bad skin day and always sure you drink enough water to reach it and path to healthier skin. take it off at night, even if it’s the last thing keep it hydrated. A good guideline is two to you feel like doing! three litres a day. When your skin isn’t feeling great don’t be If you want to take a holistic approach to LloydsPharmacy offers a FREE in store tempted to put on more make-up as a cover-up. skincare, start by finding out what’s going on Skin Analysis Service*. A skin analysis Wearing no make-up might not be an option but under the surface: LloydsPharmacy can help machine can measure elasticity, stick to products that are appropriate for your uncover all your skin’s secrets with a FREE hydration, oil (sebum), pigmentation and skin and allow it to breathe. skin consultation. skin age, then trained healthcare experts If you’ve got oily skin choose an oil-free This will measure hydration levels and then, can recommend products and give product, like a powder or mineral-based if you want to find out more, you can book a tailored skincare advice to help target any make-up, but if you have dry skin then more complete analysis to give you a full scientific concerns such as dryness, ageing, oil-based products may suit you. Another secret assessment of your skin. pigmentation or blemishes. to glowing skin is simpler still… water. The skin analysis uses innovative technology There are lots of reasons why staying hydrated to assess hydration, pH, elasticity, melanin, Visit LloydsPharmacy.com for more information *Subject to eligibility and availability Victoria Gray’s best...

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S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 39 Say it with flowers Create a work of art with blooms Words by Victoria Gray Photographs by Clive Shalice

McQueens is known worldwide for its exquisite floral arrangements, installations and acclaimed floristry courses. This year heralds the flower school’s 21st anniversary, and to celebrate, Sophie Powell, the course director, gave S Magazine a masterclass in floral design

40 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 interiors

The beautiful vintage metal urn garden centres) and put it in The next stage is “greening up”, a that’s to be used as a vessel for our the plastic container, then tape traditional floristry term for defining the arrangement sadly doesn’t hold water, it in place with some floristry tape shape of the arrangement with foliage. Sophie tells me. “So I’m going use (available from florists and garden Sophie is using magnolia foliage (with a watertight plastic pot to line it. centres nationwide). “This is to quite strong stems) to add structure and This means you can use pretty much replace the traditional floristry foam, support the flowers that she’ll add later. anything to display your arrangement which can be quite expensive and “The idea is to try to create a lattice in regardless of whether it holds isn’t great for the environment,” says with the stems so that the foliage will water or not” Sophie. The wire will give support support the arrangement,” she says and hold the foliage in place. Fill Firstly, lightly scrunch up a piece of the plastic container with fresh water Sophie is creating an asymmetrical chicken wire (available from all good and put in the urn arrangement, which allows you to use

41 more random flowers and gives the finished arrangement a beautiful organic look. Make sure you give the foliage structure with an off-centre high point balanced by a left or right, lower point

The next stage is to start filling out the arrangement. “You can use any foliage that takes your fancy, maybe something that is growing in your garden or you can forage. I’m choosing stems that have a natural curve to give the arrangement flow and movement,” says Sophie, who is using mimosas, gorgeous, spring-flowering plants, whose small, fluffy flowers have a heady marzipan scent

Now start to add flowers to the arrangement, which Sophie describes as “painting with flowers”. There are no rules as to which blooms you should choose but using something seasonal will be cheaper, she suggests. Strip the lower foliage from the stem, remove any thorns and trim the ends, even if you just take off a centimetre, as this will prolong their freshness. Try to ensure that colour runs all the way through the arrangement

If you decide to use smaller blooms, such as the highly scented narcissi martinette, group them together, as this will add more impact

Sophie has used magnolias, mimosas, poppies, tulips, roses, narcissi martinette and white anemones

McQueens Flower School celebrates spring with an exclusive and experiential series of inspiring seasonal flower workshops. A one-day flower workshop costs £225 per person. For more information on courses, visit mcqueens.co.uk or call 020 7251 5505

42 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 interiors

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 43 Morning-after-the-night- Morning-after- before eggs the-night- When your body feels sluggish before eggs from poor sleep – and maybe one too many the night before – what you need is a really satisfying breakfast. Keep the yolks runny and have good crusty bread at the ready to mop up. Olive or vegetable oil 150g (5oz) cooking chorizo, sliced into coins 1 red or white onion, peeled and finely sliced 1 red bell pepper, finely diced 1 green bell pepper, finely diced 3 cloves of garlic, peeled and finely chopped 1x400g (14oz) can of whole plum tomatoes or in-season ripe tomatoes Salt and freshly ground black pepper 4 eggs 1 tbsp sriracha or other hot sauce, plus extra to taste 100g (31⁄2oz) sour cream or crème fraîche 2 large pickled jalapeños or fresh green chillies, finely chopped (optional) 1 small bunch of flat-leaf parsley, leaves picked and roughly chopped ●●Put enough oil in a large frying pan to coat the base and place over a moderate heat. ●●Add the chorizo. Fry for about 5 minutes until the meat is just beginning to brown and the chorizo oil has begun to run out. Transfer to a plate, leaving the fat in the pan, and keep warm. ●●Add the chopped onion and peppers to the pan and cook for about 10 minutes, until softened. ●●Add the garlic and fry for a couple of minutes. Add the tomatoes and cook for about 10 minutes until rich and thick. ●●Check the seasoning, adding salt and pepper to taste. ●●Make pockets in the sauce and break an egg into each. ●●Season the eggs lightly with salt and pepper and turn down the heat as low as possible. Cupboard love ●●Distribute the cooked chorizo evenly over, cover the pan and Take some larder staples and give them a new twist cook for about 8 minutes or so, until the whites of the eggs are with a dash of imagination Styling by Victoria Gray opaque and the yolks still runny.

44 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 Spiced Persian ●●While the eggs are cooking, in chicken skewers a small bowl mix the sriracha or other chilli sauce with the sour cream or crème fraîche. Add a pinch of salt to season. ●●Sprinkle the chopped chillies and parsley over the eggs in the pan and serve with the chilli sauce and sour cream mixture on the side and hunks of crusty bread. Spiced Persian chicken skewers I grill these skewers but they would be equally good on a barbecue or you could bake them in the oven if you’d rather. Serve with warm flatbreads. Or rice with seasoned yoghurt and chopped salad is also good here. 1⁄2 a red onion, peeled and finely chopped 100g (31⁄2oz) Greek yoghurt 2 pinches of saffron strands 1⁄2 tsp ground cinnamon 1⁄4 nutmeg, grated 3 green cardamom pods, seeds finely ground A pinch of chilli flakes, or to taste 2 cloves of garlic, peeled and roughly chopped 1 tsp salt, plus extra to season About 800g (1lb 12oz) skinless, boneless chicken (thighs are best) cut into about 4cm (11⁄2in) dice 1 tsp sumac or a good squeeze of lemon juice ●●In a food processor or blender, blend the onion with the yoghurt, saffron, cinnamon, nutmeg, cardamom, chilli, garlic and salt to create a marinade. ●●Put the diced chicken into a large mixing bowl, add the marinade and give it a good stir to ensure all of the chicken is well coated. ●●Cover the bowl and refrigerate for 2-4 hours to marinate the chicken pieces. ●●Preheat the grill to medium-high and line a baking sheet with foil. ●●Thread the chicken on to Cupboard love skewers and cook under the hot grill for about 10 minutes – turning the skewers at the midway point to ensure the meat cooks evenly – until it is cooked through and lightly charred all over.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 45 ●●Remove the chicken from the grill, transfer it to a serving plate and sprinkle with the sumac or lemon juice. Fried halloumi with aubergine and butter beans Halloumi is often the default cheesy slab to fry or grill. Served as a meaty substitute at a barbecue, as it so often is, this cheese can lack any real interest apart from its characteristic squeaky saltiness. Halloumi can also tend to dry out when cooked. As a result, I think it essential to serve halloumi with something full tasting and unctuous; something that has a bit of moisture to it. Tomatoes and aubergine cooked with honey and paprika make this dish just the ticket. Serve it with pitta or flatbreads. 4 tbsps olive oil, plus extra to finish and serve 4 cloves of garlic, peeled and finely chopped 1x400g (14oz) can of whole plum tomatoes or 400g (14oz) fresh tomatoes 2 tsps ground cumin 2 tsps sweet paprika (not smoked) 1⁄2 tsp chilli flakes 1 tsp salt, plus extra to season 1 tbsp runny honey 2 large aubergines, peeled and finely diced Freshly ground black pepper 2x400g (14oz) cans of butter beans, drained and rinsed Zest and juice of 1⁄2 an unwaxed lemon Fried halloumi with Small bunch of flat-leaf parsley, aubergine and leaves picked and finely butter beans chopped, plus extra to serve 450g (1lb) halloumi, cut into 1cm (1⁄2in) slices occasionally, until the sauce is Pitta or flatbreads, to serve lovely and thick and the aubergines Reader offers ●●Put 3 tablespoons of olive oil in are soft and cooked through. Add Ice and easy a pan over a moderate heat. a splash of water if it dries out Make cracking cocktails with this ●●Add the garlic and fry for before the aubergines are cooked. Cooks Professional manual ice crusher. about 30 seconds then add the ●●Check the seasoning and adjust Pop the cubes into the top, give the tomatoes, spices, salt and honey as necessary. handle a spin, watch crushed ice fall and cook for 2 minutes until it is ●●Stir through the butter beans into the tray and add to your favourite starting to thicken. and cook for 2 minutes more to drinks. To order for £24.99, plus £4.95 ●●Add the aubergines and 200ml allow the flavours to mingle. UK mainland p&p (Northern Ireland, (7fl oz) of water and cover the pan ●●Remove from the heat and add £6.95), call 0871 664 2451 and quote with a lid. Reduce the heat slightly the lemon zest and juice and the 90994. Calls cost 12p a minute plus to bring the liquid to a simmer parsley. Mix together, then put to your network access charge. for about 20 minutes, stirring one side to keep warm.

46 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 food

●●Put the remaining oil in a non-stick frying pan over a moderate heat. ●●Add the halloumi and cook each side for about 1-2 minutes until it is golden and crisp. ●●To serve, put the aubergines and butter beans into a wide serving dish and top with the fried halloumi. ●●Sprinkle with parsley and serve with the warm pitta or flatbreads. Chicken curry mee This is a Malaysian curry soup with coconut and lemongrass. Make this when your spirits need lifting and your taste buds want to soar. It’s fairly straightforward and the chicken stock really does make a difference to the soup. Vegetable oil 1 red onion, peeled and very thinly sliced 4 cloves of garlic, peeled and thinly sliced 2 tbsps root ginger, finely grated 2 lemongrass stalks, finely chopped 500g (1lb 2oz) skinless boneless chicken thighs, cut into 4cm (11⁄2in) dice, or 600g (1lb 5oz) leftover cooked chicken 1 tsp caster sugar 1-2 red chillies, finely chopped (remove the seeds to reduce heat, if you like), plus extra to garnish (optional) 3 tbsps curry powder (mild or hot, as you like) 1x400g (14oz) can of coconut milk 1 litre (1pt 15fl oz) chicken stock or water 3 tbsps fish sauce Salt 400g (14oz) egg noodles A big handful of bean sprouts A small bunch of coriander leaves, picked and roughly chopped, to garnish 1 lime, cut into wedges ●●Put enough oil in a large pan to coat the base and place over a moderate heat. ●●Add half the onion, the garlic, ginger and lemongrass then fry for 8-10 minutes or so until softened and aromatic. ●●Turn up the heat to high and, if you’re using uncooked chicken, add this along with the sugar and Chicken curry mee

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 47

food

chilli and cook for a couple of minutes Candied lemon and until the chicken begins to just cook. saffron yoghurt cake ●●Add the curry powder and stir to coat the meat. ●●Add the coconut milk, the chicken stock or water and the fish sauce (along with the cooked chicken, if using). ●●Bring to a boil and simmer, covered, for 20 minutes until the chicken is cooked. Check the seasoning, adding salt if required. ●●Meanwhile, cook the noodles according to the packet instructions and drain well. ●●Divide the noodles between 4 warm soup bowls, ladle over the hot chicken and plenty of the broth and garnish with the bean sprouts, coriander, the rest of the raw onion and extra chopped chilli (if you wish). Serve with wedges of lime for squeezing over. Candied lemon and saffron yoghurt cake Yoghurt cakes are a doddle to make. There’s no creaming of butter and baking faff, simply mix wet ingredients into dry and pour the batter into the cake tin to bake. What makes this really special is the candied slices of lemon. 175ml (6oz) mild olive oil, or 50:50 olive and vegetable oil or melted butter, plus extra for greasing 2 unwaxed lemons, 1 very thinly sliced and the zest and juice of the other 250g (9oz) caster sugar A small pinch of saffron strands 2 eggs 175g (6oz) Greek yoghurt 175g (6oz) plain flour 11⁄2 tsps baking powder ●●Preheat the oven to 180°C/160°C fan/350°F/gas mark 4. ●●Grease a 20cm (8in) round cake tin and line with baking paper. ●●Put the lemon slices in a small saffron and simmer for 5 minutes, ●●Bake the cake in the oven for Thomson (Quadrille, £25), call pan and add enough cold water until syrupy. 40-45 minutes or until a skewer the Express Bookshop 01872 to just cover. Bring to the boil. Boil ●●Remove from the heat and inserted into the centre comes 562310 with your card details. for 45 seconds, remove from the leave to cool. out clean. Alternatively, send a cheque heat and discard the water. Put the ●●Meanwhile, in a bowl and using ●●Use the same skewer to push made payable to Express lemon slices on to a plate. an electric whisk, or by hand, tiny holes over the surface of the Bookshop, along with your ●●Put the lemon juice into whisk together the eggs, oil, cooked cake and drench with the details, to: a measuring jug and use water, yoghurt, lemon zest and remaining lemon saffron syrup. Kitchen Basics if necessary, to make it up to 75ml sugar. Add the flour and baking ●●Cool on a wire rack before Offer, PO Box (3fl oz). powder and mix briefly to combine slicing and serving. ●S 200, Falmouth ●●Pour the lemon juice and water into to a smooth batter. TR11 4WJ or the small pan you used for the lemon ●●Pour the batter into the tin. To order New Kitchen Basics: order online at slices and add 75g (3oz) of the sugar. Remove the lemon slices from the 10 Essential Ingredients, 120 expressbookshop. ●●Boil until the sugar has dissolved, syrup pan and arrange on top. Recipes – Revolutionize The Way co.uk. UK delivery then add the drained lemon slices and ●●Reserve the lemon syrup. You Cook, Every Day by Claire is free.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 49 Cuisinart’s Mini Prep Pro Culinary Edited by Victoria Gray Food Processor is a stylish, high-performance gadget. delights With a 900ml capacity, it is the perfect size for smaller quantities and won’t take up much space on your Odysea’s new organic worktop. It is easy to operate goat’s milk yoghurt has and has a blade that rotates a thick, clotted top and in either direction for a luxuriously smooth, chopping, grinding or clearing velvety texture. food from the sides of the It is made from organic bowl. Buy it from Cuisinart milk in a traditional (cuisinart.co.uk) for £55. dairy at the foot of Menikio mountain in the Drama region of northern Greece. Organic Greek Yoghurt costs £2.20 for 240g from Sainsbury’s and Waitrose or online at Odysea (odysea.com). This multiuse 18cm, three- piece aluminium steamer makes a great addition to any kitchen. The clever design means you can use the stockpot while steaming vegetables in the baskets at the same time. The soft-grip If you fancy something fizzy yet healthy, then handles make the lightweight superfood drink specialist BumbleZest has the pan safe and easy to lift and very thing. Rescue + Remedy Ginger CBD the stainless-steel base plate Turmeric is full of immune boosting, antioxidant allows it to be used on gas, and anti-inflammatory ingredients to help with electric and induction hobs. It sleep, appetite, pain and mood issues. At £1.75 costs £55 from John Lewis for a 250ml can, it is available from BumbleZest & Partners (johnlewis.com). (bumblezest.co.uk). Tried & tasted 710 810 810 910

Finest Vintage Cheddar and Extra Mature Cheddar & Onion The Best Goats Cheese & Deluxe Caramelised Red Onion Caramelised Onion Quiche, £2.50 Quiche, £2.59 for 400g, Caramelised Red Onion Quiche, & West Country Vintage Cheddar for 400g, Tesco (tesco.com) Waitrose (waitrose.com) £3 for 450g, Morrisons Quiche, £2.19 for 420g, Lidl This comes with a rich and While this one may not be the (groceries.morrisons.com) (lidl.co.uk) indulgent creamy filling and the best-looking of the bunch, it’s The goat’s cheese in this rather With its well-caramelised onions, pastry is nice and buttery, but a really flavoursome quiche nice-looking quiche is mild but it crisp-at-the-edges pastry and overall the quiche is lacking that with a light, crumbly pastry and balances well with the sweet and a rich and creamy filling, this is a cheese-flavoured punch. a comfortingly cheesy tang. sharp flavours of the red onions. quiche with great depth of flavour.

50 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 wine Jamie Goode Our expert makes it a double date with a pair of perfect pinots inot gris and pinot Domain Road Defiance Salveto Pinot Grigio 2017, some grapiness, citrus and juicy grigio are different Pinot Gris 2017, Central Moldova £6.99 or £5.99 lemony notes plus hints of names for the same Otago, New Zealand mix six, Majestic, 12.5% alcohol cherries and a touch of lychee. grape variety. You may £14.80, tanners-wines.co.uk We very rarely see wines from be familiar with Italy’s (01743 234455), 13% alcohol Moldova, although it has a big Weingut Alexander Gysler Ppinot grigio, the crisp, clean, This pinot gris from New Zealand winemaking industry. This white, “Feldstarke” Grauerburgunder slightly neutral wines that are is quite delicate but still has therefore, is a real treat – textural 2017, Rheinhessen, Germany very affordable and do a good job plenty of flavour. It is quite stony and well-balanced with pear and £13.75, Oddbins, 12.5% alcohol if you are looking for a cheap dry and minerally to taste and with lychee fruit and a citrus bite. Grauburgunder is the German white. But pinot gris, a pink- a clean and brisk acidity. There name for pinot gris and this skinned grape genetically almost is a certain grapey richness La Prendina Estate Pinot Grigio expressive dry white is stony, identical to the red grape pinot here, too, along with some 2017, Lombardy, Italy £10.50, mineral and pure with bright noir – the only difference is the distinctive undertones of bacon. Marks & Spencer, 12.5% alcohol grapefruits, some pears and skin colour – can make tasty A supple Italian wine with a bit a twist of table grapes. wines, too. These bottles show more flavour than usual, this has off the grape to excellent effect. Underwood Pinot Gris 2017, Oregon, US £13, Marks & Spencer, 13% alcohol The in-the-mouth feel of this wine augments grape, pear and citrus flavours. It has herbs, pepper and a lemony intensity, too.

Booths Pinot Grigio 2017, Venezie, Italy £7, Booths, 12% alcohol Clean, pure and linear, the sweet citrus fruit of this grigio retains its interest with a grapefruit tang and table-grape fruitiness.

Oyster Bay Pinot Gris 2017, Marlborough, New Zealand £9.50, Sainsbury’s, 12.5% alcohol The bright, intense flavours of this lively white include mandarin and spice and it tempts the palate with fruit flavours and a fresh edge. ●S

SAVE OVER 50% when you join the The Express Wine Club, powered by Virgin Wines, is delighted to offer readers a massive £54 saving on this pick of 12 delicious bottles – the perfect introduction to the Virgin Wines Discovery Club*! For the equivalent of JUST £4.17 a bottle you’ll enjoy soft and juicy Shiraz, gooseberry-fresh Sauvignon, a full and ONLY fruity South African gem and many more! Stock is strictly limited to just one case per customer! £4.17 a bottle! The Express Discovery Case was £104.88 NOW £49.99 +£7.99 P&P

Call 0843 224 1020 quoting EX2038 or visit www.virginwines.co.uk/ex2038 * Ts&Cs Apply: Offer available to new Discovery Club members only. Important – your future cases: Every three months and at Christmas, you will be notified in advance of the next Discovery Club selection. You will receive this unless you request otherwise, and the appropriate sum (currently £89.99 + £7.99 p&p) will be charged to your credit/debit card. You have no commitment whatsoever and may opt out from the Discovery Club at any time. All wines supplied by Virgin Wines. Company registration number 03800762. You must be 18 or over to purchase alcohol. Calls may be monitored or recorded for training purposes. For full Ts&Cs please visit www.virginwines.co.uk/ex2038 Also available as an all-red or all-white selection.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 51 Get the perfect garden once and floral

50p Giant Single Sunflower Seeds

* 25p £16 £4 1.5kg

50p £1 Get s tuck 3pk in

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*Plants sold separately.All products subject to availability.Please checkyourstore in advance to avoid disappointment.Online deliverycharges mayapply.WilkoSulphateof Iron 1.5kg (£2.67 per 1kg).

Job No: 58115-4 Publication: SundayExpress Size: 258x230 Ins Date: 24.03.19 Proof no: 1 Tel: 0207291 4700 gardening

From left: Annual poppy (Papaver rhoeas), California Alan Titchmarsh poppy (Eschscholzia californica) and blue pimpernel (Anagallis monellii)

Floral and hardy Create a dazzling display by growing annuals from seed, says Alan or most flower lovers, summer wouldn’t brim with multi-purpose compost, then sprinkle open in the early evening, then release their be complete without a glamorous patio seeds thinly over the top and cover with a light strong dolly-mixture scent at dusk. and a colourful hanging basket at the dusting of sifted compost. It’s usually the more compact hardy annuals front door. But bedding plants are a bit Try a trough of violas or fragrant annual that are best for container gardening, but there of a luxury when time and budgets are pinks, a window box full of multicoloured are plenty of taller kinds that you could grow Ftight. Luckily, there’s a solution. Instead of using California poppy (Eschscholzia californica), in flowerbeds. There are showy annual poppies them to create instant displays in May, try or a hanging basket of nasturtiums. For (Papaver rhoeas) or annual scabious, which is growing hardy annuals from seed. a varied display, sow a tub with a mixture good for butterflies, and helipterum, which can Many hardy annuals make great container of hardy annuals; toadflax, candytuft and be used as a cut flower or dried for the winter. displays and are easy to grow from seed; larkspur look lovely together. They are all terribly easy, too. But instead simply sow them straight into the tubs, Dwarf sunflowers are great for planting in of sowing them straight into the ground, troughs, hanging baskets or window boxes large troughs against a wall or for growing I prefer to sow the seeds into small pots. This where you want them to flower, then water and individually in large clay flowerpots. Double- way your flowers won’t have to fight it out with wait. And there’s no hanging about; you can flowered varieties are especially fab. But there faster-growing weed seedlings. Just sow a tiny start now because they are, as the name are also unusual hardy annuals that will baffle pinch of seed per container, thin them out if suggests, hardy so they don’t need any heat gardening friends. Blue pimpernel (Anagallis too many come up, then plant the whole clump to grow. The seeds will germinate as soon monellii) opens its gentian-blue flowers in sunny out when the pot is full of roots. as rising temperatures spark them into life. weather. Night phlox (Zaluzianskya capensis) is You’ll have a show of flowers to be proud of. Simply choose some packets of seeds, clean a great plant for people who are out at work all But what will drive people wild is how quick, up your containers and fill them almost to the day because its star-shaped white flowers only easy and cost-effective it was to create. ●S Reader offers Cutting edge Hit the trail Powered by a lithium-ion battery, at 0.8kg Treat yourself to a glorious summer basket this compact tool is incredibly lightweight. display of trailing Million Bells. Buy six Million The shear blade has an 80mm (3in) cutting Bells Mixed for £9.99 or order 24 for £19.98. width for lawn edges, while the trimming blade All prices include p&p. Order online at shop. cuts hedges, shrubs and bushes. Measuring express.co.uk/EXP458, call 0871 664 1469 34x7.5x11.5cm (13.5x3x4.5in), it includes or send a cheque, payable to Express a charger, two safety guards and an extension Newspapers, to Express Offer EXP458, 14 handle. To order for £34.99, plus £4.95 UK Hadfield Street, Old Trafford, Manchester M16 mainland p&p (£6.95, Northern Ireland), call 0871 664 2451 and quote 9FG. Delivery is from late April. UK-grown 90993. Calls cost 12 per minute plus your network access charge. 3cm (1in) jumbo plug plants are supplied. GETTY IMAGES VALUE FOR OTHERS OF EQUAL OR GREATER THE RIGHT TO SUBSTITUTE ANY VARIETIES WE RESERVE

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 53 Top f i ves Charlotte Heathcote Fiction

1. Still Me by Jojo Moyes (Penguin, £8.99) Free 2. Nine Perfect Strangers by Liane Moriarty (Penguin, £8.99) 3. The Tattooist Of Auschwitz by Heather Morris spirits (Zaffre, £8.99) 4. The Burning Chambers by Kate Mosse A spotlight on lives (Pan, £8.99) untamed and different 5. Wild Fire by Ann Cleeves Daisy Jones & The Six ***** (Pan, £7.99) by Taylor Jenkins Reid (Hutchinson, £12.99) Fabulous, flawed and with a voice like a fallen Non-fiction angel, the fictional Daisy Jones (think Stevie Lanny ***** Nicks of Fleetwood Mac) was a 70s musical by Max Porter 1. First Man In icon and an It girl with the kind of beauty that (Faber, £12.99) by Ant Middleton stopped traffic. Taylor Reid Jenkins tells the Max Porter’s wonderful second novel is inspired (HarperCollins, £8.99) insightful, engaging story of the barefoot, by folklore, taking an unusual approach to 2. This Is Going To Hurt sincere and soulful Daisy who craves creativity storytelling. Set in a village in the London by Adam Kay as much as she craves the drugs that underpin commuter belt, it enigmatically describes the (Picador, £8.99) her wild girl lifestyle. fallout when a young child goes missing. 3. Listening To The Animals She starts as a solo singer but it’s Lanny is a lovely, out-of-the-ordinary child, by Noel Fitzpatrick joining The Six, an on-the-up rock band, that full of madcap ideas and creative schemes, (Trapeze, £7.99) changes everything, making her and the band who freely wanders the woods and fields 4. The Fast 800 superstars. But it comes at a cost as Daisy’s surrounding the village. His parents Robert and by Michael Mosley carefree hedonism careers into something Jolie, who moved from the city for rural peace (Short, £8.99) more wayward, and fame, heartbreak and and quiet, consider him to be perfectly safe. 5. Mary Berry’s Quick Cooking addiction take their toll. But the woods hold dangers for the unwary. by Mary Berry Composed as a series of powerful interviews Chief among these is the legendary figure of (BBC, £22) with family, friends and band members, Taylor dangerous Dead Papa Toothwort, who stalks Jenkins Reid tells an explosive story of drugs, the seasons looking for something unlikely and bad decisions, songs that slay and the sexual unusual in the rural surroundings. Lanny, odd, Children’s tension between Daisy and lead singer Billy extraordinary Lanny, became the focus of his Dunne. It’s a “will they, won’t they?” scenario avid attention. And now Lanny can’t be found. 1. Diary Of Greg Heffley’s Best which takes in volatile emotions, competitive Porter’s prose is mesmerising. It’s lyrical, Friend: World Book Day 2019 egos, heartfelt lyrics and the sort of bad enchanting and terrifying, giving voice to a cast by Jeff Kinney (Puffin, £1) behaviour that leave scars on everyone involved. of characters who describe what’s happening 2. Lego Minifigure Mayhem: The tension between them is especially as the police and the media arrive, the village World Book Day 2019 fraught as Billy, a recovering addict, is and the woods are searched and people are by Beth Davies and Helen determined to do the right thing by his questioned, including elderly Peggy, who is Murray (DK Children, £1) long-term love Camila. But he can’t ignore attuned to all the neighbourhood goings-on. 3. Fing by David Walliams the frisson between himself and Daisy. Lanny’s parents, desperate and afraid for the (HarperCollins, £12.99) Taylor Jenkins Reid is brilliant at capturing safety of their son, are treated with suspicion, 4. Ten Little Bookworms: the tensions and jealousies between band as is Mad Pete, an elderly, internationally World Book Day 2019 by members and their entourage, and the way famous artist who comes under harsh scrutiny Mike Brownlow (Orchard, £1) people remember the same situations in due to his friendship with Lanny and their 5. Bad Mermaids Meet The entirely different ways. shared artistic bond. e x press bookshop ailable at v Witches: World Book Day She also sensitively explores addiction, It’s a brilliantly claustrophobic read but also 2019 by Sibéal Pounder complicated questions of love and loyalty, the incredibly eerie because the uncanny culprit is (Bloomsbury Children’s, £1) pressures of creativity and the grim emotional a decidedly tricky customer, as Peggy knows realities behind the glamorous life of a star. only too well: “I know you. I know what you’re

£1 books not a This is a gorgeous novel and a ravishing read. up to. Give the boy back.”

54 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 books

1. Name Author (Publisher, price) A twist in the tale2. Name Author Strange goings-on fire the imagination(Publisher, price) in Eithne Farry’s new fiction selection Gingerbread The Altruists by Helen Oyeyemi by Andrew Ridker (Picador, £16.99) (Jonathan Cape, £16.99) Riffing on the fairy tale of The Alters are dysfunctional Hansel And Gretel, Helen and adrift. Disgruntled dad Oyeyemi tells the strange, Arthur is in a testy relationship marvellously meandering story with a younger colleague and of Perdita Lee and her mother estranged from his children Harriet. Harriet makes Ethan and Maggie who are still gingerbread that tastes like grieving the death of their

megan b ramley “eating revenge… with darts therapist mother, Francine. of heat, spice and salt” while Ethan is reclusive and debt Perdita attempts to uncover ridden, Maggie is living a life of the truth about her mother’s self-imposed poverty and Arthur Reasons To Be Cheerful *** past and the identity of her is hoping to get their inheritance by Nina Stibbe father. Oyeyemi’s tale features to save the old family home. (Viking, £12.99) rich benefactors, changelings, This tragicomedy wittily explores In Reasons To Be Cheerful the delightful Lizzie imaginary countries and lifelike old wounds, new grievances Vogel returns, the heroine of Nina Stibbe’s dolls who offer advice on and hard-won wisdom. previous comic novels. This time round, it’s uncanny situations and difficult 1980, Lizzie is 18 and about to leave her emotions. Elegant and original. The Snakes ramshackle home and her mother’s erratic by Sadie Jones parenting for a grown-up life of her own. Last Ones Left Alive (Chatto & Windus, £14.99) Lizzie applies for a job as a dental nurse, by Sarah Davis-Goff Bea and Dan are recently is interviewed by a woman called Tammy (Tinder Press, £12.99) married and in love but low on who looks like “a diluted Dolly Parton” and Orpen is wandering the ruined funds. So they rent out their starts working with the very unpleasant JP landscape of post-apocalyptic small London flat and head to Wintergreen whose shin hair stops “at the Ireland with a dog called Burgundy where Bea’s reckless ankle, like trouser legs, or a brown rooster”. Danger and her guardian brother runs a hotel. The hotel Lizzie moves into the tiny one-bedroom flat Maeve who’s been bitten by is empty and Alex is behaving above the surgery, dusts cactuses and tries to the deadly skrakes – zombie- erratically. The situation cover up her loneliness by being sparky and like menaces. Lonely, afraid deterioriates further with the cheerful. She also develops a crush on smartly but with a raft of survival skills arrival of the siblings’ parents attired local Andy Nicolello who has a moped, learned from her dead mother, who are rich, charming, abusive a winning smile and a good job but who once she hopes to discover the and secretive. Jones writes lived in a shed, dressed like a tramp and dined legendary city of Phoenix and a tautly on the warped emotional on scraps from the local Chinese restaurant. cure for Maeve before she turns dynamics but when tragedy In a neat plot turn, Andy ends up lodging with into a flesh-eating zombie. This strikes, a promising premise Lizzie’s mother, a seductress who drinks too pacy debut marries glimmering explodes into unconvincing much and has a very casual attitude to casual prose to a gripping plot. violent melodrama. sex, causing Lizzie no end of dramatic dilemmas. To buy these books, see Express Bookshop on page 77 Nina Stibbe has a fine line in fizzy funniness as she describes Lizzie’s valiant attempts to navigate haphazard driving lessons, her Special offer for S Magazine readers attempts to seduce Andy, and the relationship Get 10 per cent off The Yorkshire Vet by Peter Wright (rrp £8.99) advice she gives to Tammy who’s having a Call 01256 302699 or order online at mirrorbooks.co.uk. Offer code X10 misguided affair with their racist, boorish boss. This enthralling book is packed full of laugh-out-loud moments, Despite the bubbling humour, there’s a heartbreaking stories and transporting tales of Peter’s love for working curious flatness to Reasons To Be Cheerful. with the animals and the people in the beautiful Yorkshire Dales. The It’s a challenge to make a dental surgery bucolic memoir charts his rustic childhood growing up on a farm, to an enticing environment in a story and his working relationship with the famous James Herriot, through to the descriptions of illegal tooth extractions and heady days of his successful Channel 5 TV series. Peter’s warm nature fillings are not conducive to comedy. and professional attitude shine through on every page. Eithne Farry

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 55

FICTION

pinch the tweezers between my know what time to arrive for the gloved thumb and forefinger. opening. I send a reply, then return “Careful,” the monitor says. to eat my sandwich at my desk. I force a smile. I’ve never At 1.45, I key my way back into understood art monitors who the gallery. The room is just as Idon’t trust art handlers. We’re two I left it, the piece standing proud parts of a single process. It’s this in the middle of the plinth. I pick guy’s job to transport the work, up the packaging I abandoned mine to install it. We’re the earlier to make room for the glass invisible cogs in the machine; the guys to do their work. secret elves bridging the magical With the bulky materials gap between artistic creation and pressed awkwardly to my chest, public consumption. I head towards my office. “Want “It’s fragile,” he says. me to take that for you, love?” “Got it.” says Eve, the cleaner, as I pass. I’ve been looking forward to “It’s OK, thanks,” I say. “We’ll working on this piece. Godfrey need it if we make a sale.” Blake went to my university. “Any good is it?” Eve says, giving He sat next to me once in a me a wink. We have a running joke narrative environments lecture that we’re the only people in the and I complimented him on his gallery that ever properly look boots. He said he couldn’t take at the art: me to assess its credit, he’d stolen them off his presentation, her to inspect for housemate. When he won the The dust. I shrug and she wheels her Turner Prize, the media made a big trolley in the other direction. thing about him being too young to Two and a half minutes later, I deserve it, but I liked his work. return to the gallery and scream. “I don’t get it,” Monique I feel Eve’s eyes seeking mine, said when I took her to see wondering what’s wrong. But my his deconstructed blowtorched gaze is locked to her fingertips. wardrobe last year. “If we did this I’m staring at the empty Starbucks to our wardrobe, would it be art? Handler cup she’s just crushed, ready to What has he actually made?” You could always rely on a new Blake toss in the bin bag on the back of I shrugged, amused by my her trolley. “Don’t. Move.” fiancée’s rage. “He’s made us for shock value, but this one was a I watch as Godfrey Blake takes look.” Monique wrinkled her nose a glass from the offered tray and and moved on to the next piece. real work of art… Short story by Natasha Bell makes his way towards the crowd “We’re happy with the plinth,” surrounding the plinth. My heart the monitor says as I peel another placed exactly two and a half “The front.” I don’t move. hammers in my chest as people sheet of protective packaging from metres beneath a hanging spot.” I sense a ripple in the air and part. Godfrey’s gaze lands on the box. “But Blake asked me to “Good.” I lift away the final layer wonder if we’re about to share the piece and the room seems double-check you’ve worked to his and gaze at Blake’s latest piece. a smile, a laugh even. “The logo,” to freeze. exact specifications for the casing.” After a decade in this job I he says, recovering himself. I twist “Magnificent,” someone says. This guy is probably an artist shouldn’t be shocked, but I am. the object 30 degrees. “Perfect.” Godfrey raises his palms to his himself; probably thinks the “There,” the monitor says with “We’ll be installing the casing cheeks. Then he smiles. “Thank pieces he babysits are in some a hiss of satisfaction. I clench my this afternoon,” I say, removing you. It’s always scary sending a way his own creations. Don’t get bottom lip between my teeth as my gloves and reaching for my new creation into the world.” me wrong, like so many in this my fingers close around the clipboard. The monitor twitches. “You know,” Monique whispers profession, I started out in art pristine object. The monitor holds “I’ll be supervising the install. as Godfrey moves away, swallowed school. It didn’t take me long in his breath as I lift the work from The gallery will be locked until by the champagne-clinking, this job, though, to realise I get its cradle, delivering it to the room. then – only the director and canapé-nibbling crowd. “I actually far more out of achieving the “Ta-da!” I always want to say at I have access.” I look at him kind of like this one.” We stand for perfect hang on a Rembrandt or this point. This is the part of my for a moment, then add, “You’re a moment, observing the crumpled meticulously replacing Tracey job people get excited about at welcome to stay if you’d like.” plastic and cardboard, the green Emin’s scattered bedsheets than dinner parties. “Do you really He clears his throat. “I have siren twisted into a silent scream. I did in my studio. Which is lucky, get to touch the art?” they say. another appointment.” He follows “Me too,” I say, wishing I could because I’m much better at this. “What’s the most famous piece me into the corridor and waits tell her it’s Eve’s, not Godfrey’s, “Three millimetre glass,” I say, you’ve held?” while I key in my code to lock creation. ●S wondering what kind of art this I place it on the small raised the doors. We sign each other’s man makes for himself. I’m block in the middle of the plinth. paperwork and say goodbye. Natasha Bell’s debut novel, His picturing something involving “Blake wants it facing the My phone buzzes as I wait in the Perfect Wife (Penguin, £7.99), is out

: G etty I mages B e ll 2019 / i llu stration © N atasha taxidermy. “Fifty centimetre cubed, entrance.” I hesitate. “Which bit?” queue at Pret. Monique wants to now. See Bookshop on page 77.

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 57 INTERVIEW

“MY son Louie good at putting things into is about two perspective. The things you think months old in are rubbish end up being good. this picture. Barbara has been the voice He and his of reason throughout my career. sister Pearl She’s had massive highs and are three now. lows. She told me that things Barbara never can change in a heartbeat – it just liked coming takes one phone call. south of the river, so coming to When I left EastEnders I didn’t see me and the babies was a big work for a little while. I started to deal. Barbara had a really calming wobble. I wondered if I was good effect on the twins. They were enough. Barbara reminded me going mental before she arrived. that she had 10 years of little She spent the whole visit holding work. She had big success in the Louie’s hand. It was just gorgeous. Carry On movies and EastEnders I started going into labour on was like a second chance. I find Barbara’s birthday, August 6, the resilience she has inspiring. but the twins held on until my I’ve been friends with her for over husband’s birthday three days later. a decade. She says the most Barbara has been a massive perfect things to me and she’s a part of my life, professionally and lovely, generous lady. It’s tough to personally. I first appeared on see how she’s living with dementia. EastEnders in 2006 but I actually I’m running the Virgin Money met Barbara back in 2002. I London Marathon for Alzheimer’s worked for an events company research. When Barbara asks you while I studied at drama school. to do something you can’t say no. I was hired as a waitress to serve In the UK, one person is diagnosed canapés at the soap awards. with dementia every three My table happened to be the minutes. Of the top 10 causes of EastEnders cast. I had a nice death, dementia is the only one there will be a cure or a way to Scott so we meet up on a Friday, chat with Barbara. I was happy that we can’t cure, prevent or even cope with the disease better. run together and catch up. I find to see a familiar face when I slow down. My mum works in A massive part of being an running so boring so chatting started working on the soap. It’s nursing homes. I did, too. I’ve actor is remembering things. Your makes the time go faster. very surreal walking on to a set seen how it affects people. I want memories are such a big part of I’m now in Call The Midwife and like that. I watched the soap as to fly the flag and get people to dig who you are. It’s scary. That’s why In The Long Run but EastEnders a kid and suddenly it became a deep and sponsor us. I feel for Barbara. She remembers will always have a place in my weird reality. I’m running with some of my so much about the past as clear heart. Anytime I get the twins to Barbara was a well-known face ex-cast members like Emma as day yet she won’t remember bed early I have a sneaky peek on the soap. She gave me pearls Barton and Adam Woodyatt and my name. We still have funny at what’s going on in Walford.” ●S of wisdom and shared little tricks Barbara’s husband, Scott Mitchell. moments. It’s not bleak all the of the trade. I lucked out with We call ourselves Barbara’s time but it is hardcore. It’s a cruel Kellie is supporting the Alzheimer’s having her close, I really did. Revolutionaries. We’re trying to disease that robs you of memories. Society and Alzheimer’s Research I used to beat myself up about raise over £100,000. Research Any time I’m in town for an UK campaign Dementia Revolution. my acting but Barbara would tell will beat dementia but we need audition I’ll meet up with Barbara Sponsor her at uk.virginmoney me to let it go, be better next time, more funding to find a cure. I hope and Scott for a cup of tea. I’ve giving.com/barbarasrevolutionaries.

G etty I mages believe in yourself. She was really that within my children’s lifetime always done that. I’m training with See dementiarevolution.org. My favourite photograph by actress Kellie Shirley Ex-EastEnders star Kellie, 36, recalls the day acting legend Dame Barbara Windsor made a special trip to meet her twins Words by Kirsten Jones

58 S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 What to

Period drama,watch adventure, home makeovers – Rianne Ison reveals the best on the box Programme of the week Victoria As the eight-part series opens, it’s 1848 and Queen Victoria (Jenna Coleman) is facing tough times. With uncertainty in the air and revolutions taking place on the continent, the young monarch questions her position. As the Government urges her to flee London for safety, Victoria and her husband Albert (Tom Hughes) clash over their future. The couple’s difficulties are made worse when Victoria’s sister Feodora (Kate Fleetwood) arrives unexpectedly. Laurence Fox also joins the cast. Tonight, 9pm, ITV

Blue Planet Live Sarah Beeny’s Renovate Pitching In Join presenters Chris Packham, Steve Don’t Relocate When a recently widowed caravan owner (Larry Backshall and Liz Bonnin as they front this With more Brits moving house, property expert Lamb) starts to reassess his future, he decides special four-part live adventure exploring the Sarah Beeny hosts this new series to show it’s time to sell up and move on. But his plan is world’s oceans. The trio will each be based in a that perhaps the answer is to renovate, not quickly scuppered when his daughter Carys different exotic location – Mexico, the Bahamas relocate. Sarah looks at how to make the (Caroline Sheen) arrives with her son in tow and Australia’s Great Barrier Reef – as they space work harder for families, before returning after breaking up with her boyfriend and give a fascinating snapshot into marine life. months later to see if her plans have worked. announces she’s staying. Hayley Mills also stars. Tonight, Wednesday, Thursday, 8pm, BBC1 Monday, 8pm, Really Weekdays, 2.15pm, BBC1 Soap watch Mike Ward tunes in and catches up on the latest in the wonderful world of soapland Coronation Street is furious when she realises she’s been set Neighbours Unable to cope with the fallout from the fatal up. Sonia then turns to Jack for help. Determined to ensure that Finn faces factory collapse, Carla decides she should get consequences, Karl decides to go out away for a few days. Some take this as further Emmerdale on a limb to help him get his memory back. evidence of her guilt. But she’s not the only Recognising one of Robert’s new clients as one who’s panicking about a possible a dodgy character, Charity spots a chance to Home And Away manslaughter charge. make some money. Since it means getting flirty Colby fears for his future without Chelsea, with this chap, Vanessa is not happy. while Dean is haunted by nightmares of what EastEnders they did to Ross. Sonia and Whitney are horrified Hollyoaks when they find out just how much Tuesday is when Mercedes and Doctors trouble Tiffany is in. A worried Sylver and Myra and Sally are Accident-prone youngster Mikey is continuing Bernadette manages to lure her meant to be getting hitched. But to cause concern. But Karen fears social back to the Square (right), but Tiff both weddings could be in jeopardy. services may be overreacting.

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Peppa Pig (rpt) (HD) 6.05 Peppa Pig (rpt) Impossible Railways 8.00 Mission: Kill Hitler 9.00 (rpt) 7.45 Frasier (rpt) 8.10 Frasier (rpt) 8.40 (HD) 6.10 The Day Henry Met (rpt) (HD) 6.15 Porridge 11.00 Open All Hours 1.00am FILM Frasier (rpt) 9.10 Everybody Loves Raymond The Secret Life Of Puppies (rpt) (HD) 6.25 Ben Monsoon Railways (2013) 2.00 Raiders of the Lost Art (rpt) 9.40 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 10.10 And Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 6.35 Wissper (rpt) ITV2 7.10am You’ve Been Framed! Gold 8.00 Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares USA (rpt) 11.05 (HD) 6.40 Noddy: Toyland Detective (rpt) (HD) Emmerdale 9.00 You’ve Been Framed! Gold 9.25 The Undercover Boss USA (rpt) (HD) 12.00 Channel 4 6.55 Thomas & Friends (rpt) (HD) 7.05 Shane The Ellen DeGeneres Show 10.20 Superstore 11.15 You’ve News Summary (HD) 12.05 Come Dine With Me Chef (rpt) (HD) 7.20 Peppa Pig (rpt) 7.30 Peppa Been Framed! 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CHANNEL 4 CHANNEL 5 Friday 29 March 2019

Drama 7.10am Bergerac 8.00 Juliet Bravo 9.00 Pie in the Sky 10.00 Classic Holby City 11.00 The Bill 1.00pm Classic EastEnders 2.15 Bergerac 3.20 Lovejoy 4.20 Pie in the Sky 5.20 Birds of a Feather 6.00 Brush Strokes 6.40 Bread 7.20 Last of the Summer Wine 8.00 The Doctor Blake Mysteries 9.00 Father Brown 10.00 New Tricks 11.15 Taggart 2.05am Shetland 3.06 The Bill Yesterday 7.10am Machines of War 8.00 Time The Last Leg, 10pm The Gadget Show, 7pm Team 10.00 Murder Maps 11.00 World War Weird 12.00noon Time Team 2.00 Planet Earth 3.00 Wild Africa 4.00 Murder Maps 5.00 World War Weird 6.25 Cheers (rpt) (HD) 6.55 Cheers (rpt) (HD) 7.20 6.00 Milkshake! Peppa Pig (rpt) 6.05 Peppa Pig (rpt) 6.00 Nazi Hunters 7.00 Impossible Railways 8.00 Cheers (rpt) (HD) 7.45 Frasier. Classic comedy. 6.10 The Day Henry Met (rpt) (HD) 6.15 The Trains That Changed the World 9.00 Impossible (rpt) 8.10 Frasier (rpt) 8.40 Frasier (rpt) 9.10 Secret Life Of Puppies (rpt) (HD) 6.25 Ben And Railways 10.00 Narrow Escapes of World War Two Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 9.40 Everybody Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 6.35 Wissper (rpt) (HD) 11.00 Murder Maps 12.00midnight World War Weird Loves Raymond (rpt) 10.10 Ramsay’s Kitchen 6.40 Noddy: Toyland Detective (rpt) (HD) 6.55 ITV2 6.20am Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records Nightmares USA (rpt) 11.05 Undercover Boss Thomas & Friends: Big World! Big Adventures! (rpt) 7.10 You’ve Been Framed! Gold: Top 100 Senior USA (rpt) (HD) 12.00 Channel 4 News Summary (HD) 7.05 Shane The Chef (rpt) (HD) 7.20 Peppa Moments 8.00 Emmerdale 9.00 You’ve Been Framed! (HD) 12.05 Come Dine With Me (rpt) (HD) 1.05 Pig (rpt) 7.30 Peppa Pig (HD) 7.35 Top Wing (rpt) Gold 9.25 Ellen DeGeneres 10.20 Superstore 11.15 Find It, Fix It, Flog It (rpt) (HD) 2.10 Countdown (HD) 7.55 Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 8.05 Digby Dragon You’ve Been Framed! Gold 12.15pm Emmerdale 1.15 (HD) 3.00 A Place In The Sun: Summer Sun (rpt) (rpt) (HD) 8.20 Floogals (rpt) (HD) 8.35 Ben And You’ve Been Framed! Gold 1.45 Ellen DeGeneres Show (HD) 4.00 Escape To The Chateau: DIY (HD) 5.00 Holly’s Little Kingdom (rpt) 8.55 Shimmer And Shine 2.35 The Jeremy Kyle Show 5.50 Take Me Out 7.00 Four In A Bed (HD) 5.30 Come Dine With Me (HD) (rpt) (HD) 9.05 The Secret Life Of Puppies (rpt) You’ve Been Framed! Gold 8.00 You’ve Been Framed! (HD) 9.15 Jeremy Vine (HD) 11.15 The Nightmare Gold: A-Z of Growing Up 9.00 FILM Fast & Furious 7 6.00 The Simpsons (5/20) Homer and Marge Neighbour Next Door (rpt) (HD) 12.10 5 News (2015,12) 11.40 Family Guy 12.40am American Dad! parody the film Mr & Mrs Smith, while Bart and Lunchtime (HD) 12.15 Can’t Pay Special: Big Family ITV3 6.55am Heartbeat 8.00 Murder, She Wrote 9.05 Lisa help extraterrestrials phone home – until Bust Up (rpt) (HD) 1.10 Access (HD) 1.15 Home Judge Judy 10.30 Agatha Christie’s Marple 12.40pm the aliens’ sinister plans are revealed. (rpt) And Away (HD) 1.45 Neighbours (HD) 2.15 FILM Heartbeat 1.45 Classic Emmerdale 2.50 Classic A Bundle Of Trouble: An Aurora Teagarden Mystery Coronation Street 3.55 Agatha Christie’s Marple 5.55 6.30 Hollyoaks Damon is determined to help a (2017) Premiere. Mystery, starring Candace Cameron hysterical Maxine, plus Sinead struggles to hide Heartbeat 7.00 Murder, She Wrote 8.00 Paul O’Grady: Bure. (HD) 4.00 Friends (rpt) (HD) 4.30 Friends For the Love of Dogs 8.30 Doc Martin 10.30 Lewis her jealousy when she finds out that Laurie is (rpt) 5.00 5 News At 5 (HD) 5.30 Neighbours (rpt) going on a school camping trip with Sienna. (rpt) ITV4 6.25am The Avengers 7.15 Kojak 8.10 Quincy 6.00 Home And Away Maggie thinks of a ME 9.15 Minder 10.20 The Sweeney 11.30 The 7.00 Channel 4 News Latest headlines. (HD) way to survive Year 12 and Mason researches Professionals 12.35pm The Avengers 1.40 Kojak 2.40 8.00 Kirstie And Phil’s Love It Or List It medicinal cannabis. Meanwhile, Raffy tries to Quincy ME 3.45 Minder 4.50 The Professionals 5.55 The Sweeney 7.00 The Chase 8.00 Bear’s Mission with (3/7) Kirstie Allsopp and Phil Spencer help hide her latest seizure from Ryder and offers the Clayton-Fisher family whose members Anthony Joshua 9.00 FILM Rocky III (1982,PG) 11.10 a way out of their relationship. (rpt) (HD) The Contender 12.20am Better Late Than Never have fallen out of love with their home in 6.30 5 News Tonight Latest headlines. (HD) Walthamstow, East London. Sarah and her wife BBC FOUR 7.00pm World News Today 7.30 Top of Pepper have opposing views on what to do with 7.00 NEW SERIES The Gadget Show (1/13) the Pops: 1987 8.00 Fleetwood Mac: A Musical History Jon Bentely, Ortis Deley and Georgie Barrat visit 9.00 The Beatles: Made on Merseyside 10.25 Sgt Pepper’s their two bedroom terrace, as Sarah thinks it is Musical Revolution – with Howard Goodall 11.25 Classic time to move on, but Pepper is digging her heels the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas to discover the mind-boggling technological Albums: Paul Simon – Graceland 12.25am Top of the in and wants to convert the loft. (rpt) (HD) Pops: 1987 12.55 Primal Scream: The Lost Memphis Tapes advances on offer. Followed by 5 News Update. 9.00 Gogglebox Capturing the households’ Sky One 6.00am Monkey Life 7.00 Animal House instant reactions to what they are watching on 8.00 Paddington Station: The Big 8.00 The Dog Whisperer 9.00 Road Wars 10.00 Babylon TV from the comfort of their own sofas. (HD) Weekend Getaway (9/20) Customer 5 11.00 NCIS 1.00pm Hawaii Five-0 3.00 Big Beasts: Last ambassador Natalie works flat out to help of the Giants 4.00 Modern Family 5.00 The Simpsons 10.00 The Last Leg Aisling Bea joins Adam passengers get their Easter weekend off to a 5.30 Futurama 6.30 The Simpsons 8.30 Modern Family Hills, Josh Widdicombe and Alex Brooker smooth start, while Bristol’s signal control is 9.00 Curfew 10.00 Thronecast: Gameshow of Thrones for a comic review of the significant moments relocated to Didcot. (rpt) (HD) Followed by 11.30 Comedians Watching Football with Friends of the past seven days. Last in the series. (HD) 5 News Update. The latest headlines. (HD) Sky Atlantic 6.00am The British 7.00 Storm 11.05 The Big Narstie Show (6/8) City 8.00 Fish Town 9.00 The West Wing 11.00 9.00 Eamonn & Ruth: How The Other House 1.00pm Without a Trace 2.00 Blue Bloods Guests Zawe Ashton and Sue Perkins join the Half Lives Part two of two. Eamonn grime MC and co-host Mo the Comedian to 3.00 The West Wing 5.00 House 7.00 CSI: Crime Scene Holmes and Ruth Langsford meet Jacqueline Investigation 8.00 Blue Bloods 9.00 Game of Thrones discuss the week’s news, TV and trends. (HD) Gold, the force behind Ann Summers. (HD) Sky Cinema Premiere 6.00am Riot (2018,15) 12.10 FILM 30 Days Of Night (2007) Horror, starring Josh 10.00 The Royal Family At War (1/2) 8.00 Stella’s Last Weekend (2018,15) 10.00 Hotel Hartnett. (W) (HD) 2.00 Home (rpt) 2.30 Traitors documentary charting royal rifts. (rpt) (HD) Transylvania 3: A Monster Vacation (2018,U) 11.50 (rpt) (SL) (HD) 3.25 New Landlords From Hell: 11.10 Britain’s Favourite Crisps (rpt) (HD) Serenity: Special 12.20pm Skyscraper (2018,12) 2.20 Tag Dispatches (rpt) (SL) (HD) 3.55 Coast Vs Country (2018,15) 4.10 Stella’s Last Weekend (2018,15) 6.10 (rpt) 4.50 All Star Driving School (rpt) 5.15 The £100k 1.10 Teleshopping. Buying goods from home. 3.10 NCIS Hotel Transylvania 3: A Monster Vacation (2018,U) 8.00 Drop. Davina McCall is joined by siblings Cath and Alex (rpt) 4.00 NCIS (rpt) (HD) 4.45 House Doctor (rpt) Skyscraper (2018,12) 9.50 Tag (2018,15) 11.35 First from Cardiff and Roy and James from Leeds. (rpt) (HD) (SL) 5.10 House Busters (rpt) 5.35 Wildlife SOS (rpt) Reformed (2017,15) 1.35am Beneath Us (2018,15) Film4 11.00am The Spy Who Came in from the Cold (1965,PG) 1.25pm A Night to Remember (1958,PG) Gold REALLY 4.10 Von Ryan’s Express (1965,PG) 6.35 The River 7.00am Sorry! 7.35 Sorry! 8.10 Goodnight Sweetheart 6.00am Fantasy Homes by the Sea 7.00 Teleshopping Wild (1994,12) 9.00 Die Hard 4.0 (2007,15) 11.35 The 8.50 Goodnight Sweetheart 9.25 Last of the Summer Wine 8.00 Homes Under the Hammer 9.00 Homes Under Guest (2014,15) 1.40am Predestination (2014,15) 10.05 Last of the Summer Wine 10.50 Last of the Summer the Hammer 10.00 Tipping Point 11.00 Tipping Point Talking Pictures TV 6.00am FILM The Iron Wine 11.30 2point4 Children 12.05pm 2point4 Children 12.00noon Escape to the Country 1.00 Escape to the Maiden (1962,U) 8.00 Johnny Ringo 8.30 FILM Night of 12.45 Keeping Up Appearances 1.25 Keeping Up Country 2.00 Fantasy Homes by the Sea 3.00 Sarah the Prowler (1962,U) 9.45 FILM The Greed of William Appearances 2.05 2point4 Children 2.45 2point4 Children Beeny’s Renovate Don’t Relocate 4.00 Most Haunted Hart (1948,PG) 11.20 FILM Duel in the Sun (1946,PG) 3.25 Last of the Summer Wine 4.10 Last of the Summer 5.00 Ghost Adventures 6.00 Antiques Road Trip 7.00 2.00pm The Edgar Wallace Mystery Theatre 3.10 The Wine 4.50 Last of the Summer Wine 5.30 Only Fools and Celebrity Antiques Road Trip 8.00 Sarah Beeny’s Renovate Telephone at Work 3.25 FILM Lure of the Wilderness Horses 7.20 Only Fools and Horses 8.40 Citizen Khan Don’t Relocate 9.00 Ghost Adventures 10.00 Paranormal (1952,U) 5.15 Car Crazy 5.30 Robin’s Nest 6.00 9.20 Bottom 10.00 Live at the Apollo 11.00 Peep Show Investigators 11.00 My Ghost Story: Caught on Camera Crystal Palace 6.05 FILM Meet Mr Lucifer (1953,PG) 11.35 Peep Show 12.10am Gimme Gimme Gimme 12.50 12.00midnight Paranormal Witness: True Terror 1.00 7.45 FILM Witness In The Dark (1959,U) 9.00 Callan Gimme Gimme Gimme 1.25 The Last Fast Show Ever Ghost Adventures 2.00 Teleshopping. Home shopping. 10.00 FILM Prizzi’s Honor (1985,15) Black comedy. of goingtopress correct attime details are All programme (HD) (SL) (AD) (S) Subtitles (rpt) Repeat (W) Widescreen Number (1/3) Episode 9.15 1 55 11. 10.30 10.10 8.25 7.20 12.20 6.05 6.00 All Together Now, 7.20pm 6.50 High Definition Sign Language Audio Description

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CHANNEL 4 CHANNEL 5 Saturday 30 MARCH 2019

Drama 7.10am Pie in the Sky 11.00 Sharpe 1.00pm A Place to Call Home 3.00 To the Manor Born 5.00 Father Brown 6.05 The Brokenwood Mysteries 8.00 Murdoch Mysteries 9.00 Taggart 11.00 Ashes to Ashes 2.40am (BST) Mapp and Lucia 5.00 Teleshopping Yesterday 6.00am Raiders of the Lost Art 7.10 China’s Megatomb: Secrets of the Terracotta Army 8.00 Prince John: The Windsors’ Tragic Secret 9.00 Time Team Heineken Champions Cup Rugby Union, 12.15pm Friends, from 12.10pm 1.00pm David Attenborough’s Natural Curiosities 7.00 Impossible Railways 9.00 Impossible Engineering 11.00 Private Lives 12.00midnight Trains That Changed the 6.10 Everybody Loves Raymond (rpt) 6.40 Everybody 6.00 TBA 6.05 Milkshake! Peppa Pig (rpt) 6.10 Peppa Pig World 2.00 (BST) The Dambusters’ Great Escape: Loves Raymond (rpt) 7.05 Frasier (rpt) 7.30 Frasier (rpt) 6.15 Sunny Bunnies (HD) 6.20 Sunny Bunnies Secret History 3.00 Teleshopping. Home shopping. (rpt) 7.55 The Big Bang Theory (rpt) (HD) 8.20 (rpt) (HD) 6.25 Ben And Holly’s Little Kingdom ITV2 6.00am Totally Bonkers Guinness World Records The Big Bang Theory (rpt) (HD) 8.50 The Big Bang (rpt) 6.35 Noddy: Toyland Detective (rpt) (HD) 6.50 6.15 Emmerdale 8.45 Coronation Street 11.45 The Voice Theory (rpt) (HD) 9.15 The Simpsons (rpt) 9.45 Fireman Sam (rpt) (HD) 7.00 Thomas & Friends UK 1.45pm BGT: Top 10 Comedy Corkers 2.50 You’ve The Simpsons (rpt) 10.15 Heineken Champions Cup (rpt) (HD) 7.15 Bob The Builder (rpt) (HD) 7.25 Been Framed! Gold 3.20 FILM The Mummy Returns Rugby: The Big Tackle (HD) 11.15 The Simpsons Digby Dragon (rpt) (HD) 7.40 Peppa Pig (rpt) 7.50 (2001,PG) 5.55 FILM Arthur (2011,12) 8.00 FILM Wrath (rpt) 11.45 The Simpsons (rpt) 12.15 Heineken Peppa Pig (rpt) (HD) 8.00 Ben And Holly’s Little of the Titans (2012,12) 10.05 Celebrity Juice 10.50 Champions Cup Rugby Union. Edinburgh v Munster Kingdom (rpt) 8.15 Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 8.35 Family Guy 12.15am American Dad! Animated comedy. (Kick-off 12.45pm). Coverage of the quarter-final Nella The Princess Knight (rpt) (HD) 8.45 Wissper ITV3 6.00am Judge Judy 7.25 Agatha Christie’s Poirot clash, with Munster star Joey Carbery in action, (rpt) (HD) 8.50 Pirata & Capitano (rpt) (HD) 9.15 8.35 A Touch of Frost 12.55pm Agatha Christie’s Marple which will see the winners progress to a semi-final Paw Patrol (rpt) (HD) 9.30 Shane The Chef (rpt) 7.00 Vera 12.50am Classic Emmerdale. British soap. against either Sarcens or Glasgow Warriors. (HD) (HD) 9.40 Floogals (rpt) (HD) 10.00 Rise Of The ITV4 6.00am World of Sport: Petrol Heads 6.15 The 3.00 Four In A Bed (rpt) (HD) 3.30 Four In A Bed Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (rpt) (HD) 10.15 Rise Professionals 7.10 The Return of Sherlock Holmes 9.30 (rpt) (HD) 4.00 Four In A Bed (rpt) (HD) 4.30 Four Of The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (rpt) (HD) ITV Racing: The Opening Show. A look ahead to the day’s In A Bed (rpt) (HD) 5.00 Four In A Bed (rpt) (HD) 11.25 Access (HD) 12.10 Friends. Comedy about racing at Doncaster and Kempton Park. 10.30 World of the lives and loves of six New Yorkers, starring. 5.30 The Secret Life Of The Zoo Sport: Footballing Upsets 10.45 Kojak 11.50 FILM Jennifer Aniston, Courteney Cox, Lisa Kudrow, David Columbo: A Deadly State of Mind (1975,PG) 1.30pm ITV Documentary using close-up camera technology Schwimmer, Matt LeBlanc and Matthew Perry. (rpt) Racing: Live from Doncaster. Coverage of today’s race to reveal the behaviour of the animals at (HD) 12.40 Friends (rpt) (HD) 1.10 Friends (rpt) meetings from Doncaster and Kempton Park. 4.00 FILM Chester Zoo. Giant otter couple Diego (HD) 1.40 Friends (rpt) (HD) 2.10 Friends (rpt) From Russia with Love (1963,PG) 5.05 FYI Daily 5.10 and Icana are the best of friends but have never (HD) 2.45 Live Gallagher Premiership Rugby Union. FILM From Russia with Love (1963,PG) 6.20 FILM Red mated, so keepers hope a new male will have Coverage of a key clash. (HD) 5.15 The Yorkshire River (1948,U) 7.25 FYI Daily 7.30 FILM Red River what it takes to relight Icana’s fire. Blue morpho Vet. Documentary about Yorkshire vet Julian Norton, (1948,U) 9.00 FILM High Plains Drifter (1973,18) 10.00 his partner Peter Wright and their team. 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There’s a cat fight at Hammond Towers as our columnist battles to take back control from her wayward feline friends Illustration by Susan Hellard

e have three generations of she was an affectionate little kitten, before she also developed an aversion to grooming, and cats, all tabbies – Twiglet, matured into a fiendish feline. with claws like flick knives, it would take a a short-haired, strangely But Frazzle is no vicious, hissing creature. brave man with chain mail gauntlets to address short-tailed cat who is 13 Ironically, with her long, lustrous fur, dazzlingly his coat. (I have the wounds to prove it). years old and the grandma white chin and bib and enormous, sparkling Frazzle, on the other hand, has taken to ofW the group; Frazzle, her long-haired daughter; green eyes she could have a modelling career leaving me “messages” downstairs. She will and Frazzle’s almost identical offspring as the ultimate “chocolate-box” cat. only leave the house if I hunt her down and Ketchup, the baby of the bunch. Then there She lies in regal splendour on the middle carry her, kicking and screaming, out of the is Satchel, the only boy, a silver-tipped red stairs, waiting to greet any human visitors with front door. Then she does an impression of Maine Coon – an enormous, long-haired a sweet, melodious mew. If her ploy works, she Dino, the dinosaur from The Flintstones, and creature who looks like a shaggy white lion. will wheedle her way into the guest bedroom, immediately runs to the back door, flies Twiglet was once a much-adored lap cat, until and likely poo in their slippers. through the catflap and is back in the hall she made the mistake of choosing Frazzle as Some years back, both Satchel and Frazzle before I’ve had chance to draw breath. the kitten she would like to keep. Frazzle soon began to go missing for days at a time. We We can only assume that wherever the two began sparring with her mother, and just before couldn’t deny the cats access to the great cats were visiting, they learned to cope without her own kittens were due, turned on poor Twiglet outdoors, and inquiries with our neighbours access to either cat litter or the outdoors and so violently, the matriarch decided to spend a came up blank, so the ritual continued, until the habit of a carpet as a toilet has stuck. few days in the hay barn to avoid confrontation. a year or so ago. I’ve tried every cleaning product known to The moment her confinement was over, Frazzle Suddenly, their wanderings ceased, leaving man, I’ve doused the areas in orange fragrance emerged ready for a fight. She ran her mother us with an appalling side effect. From being the (which cats supposedly hate), I’ve even used out of the house and became the banshee cleanest of house cats, they have become the surgical spirit, but any minor success has been of Hammond Towers, while Twiglet set up dirtiest. If Satchel is caught short in the night, short-lived. I’m bored to death of cleaning permanent residence in the barn. he will walk straight past the litter tray and do carpets and getting through more Marigolds Meanwhile, Satchel, the most cowardly of his business on the landing carpet. He has than is healthy for one woman, so I had an idea. lions, remained henpecked and equally terrified Their toilet habits were reset in a negative way, of Frazzle. So when Twiglet was under attack, so perhaps they can be reset again? her once-devoted spouse was nowhere to be My plan is simple. Shortly, they’re seen. Indoors and out, Frazzle reigned supreme. going to find themselves in prison (or But Frazzle made her own mistake (I like to what we would call a cattery). They won’t think of it as karma), as her smallest, see so much as a tuft of carpet for a weakest kitten has grown into a tiny couple of weeks, and it will become powerhouse. It is Ketchup who now fairly obvious to them where the loo rules the roost, and even though is. Satchel is going to have the full she is half the size of her convict experience – just prior to mother, she is always the victor admission he is off to the vet (if I in a squabble. She sleeps with can manage to contain him) for a the dogs (if she’s so inclined) tooth clean and bit of a crewcut. He and not only drinks from has only himself to blame – had he their water bowls, but will kept himself groomed, or allowed even shove Dimple Chicken us to do it, he would keep his out of the way to eat the flowing locks. Instead, he will just poor pup’s supper. have to wear a striped jumper While the dogs accept while he’s doing time to Twiglet and Ketchup as honorary cover his embarrassment. members of the pack, Frazzle is In the meantime, our universally despised. She may carpets will be professionally once have been as sweet as cleaned, Ketchup and Twiglet can her daughter, cherished by enjoy a couple of weeks of peace dogs and cats alike, but that and I can seek out a supplier of cat

Su san H e ll ard c /o ARENA was a long time ago when nappies, just in case. ●S

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 75

Russell Grant What does this week hold for you?

Gemini may 22 - jun 21 Scorpio Oct 24 - Nov 22 It isn’t possible to say yes to everything so give You have a goal to reach by the end of the yourself a little downtime. Although you don’t month but someone is trying to hold you back want to disappoint anyone, there is a limit to and you can’t understand why. They will discover what you are able to do. A trip to new places will their delaying tactics have backfired when you be inspirational and give you an energy boost. become even more determined to succeed. Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3903* more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3908*

Cancer Jun 22 - Jul 23 Sagittarius Nov 23 - Dec 21 Start the week in a proactive manner and with A newfound curiosity will take you to places full a head-on approach to your problems. Volunteer of interesting people and it will be liberating to take on the chores around the house as this to go where and when you want. You’ve been will give other people the time and freedom to preoccupied with personal problems, lately, so discuss essential issues. Remain active. new friends will put the smile back on your face. Lady Gaga Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a March 28, 1986 more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3904* more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3909* gett y images

Aries Mar 21 - apr 20 Leo Jul 24 - Aug 23 Capricorn Dec 22 - Jan 20 Your emotions are up and down, so bursts of While you are always anxious to please friends To ensure a happier future, you need to make enthusiasm will be followed by lulls. You seem and colleagues, this is the week to think about choices in your relationship. Be open and unable to make any progress when you’re not yourself for a change. You’ve earned some honest in what you have to say, as things have feeling up to things, mentally or physically, and me-time, so pamper yourself. Take a relative’s changed a lot since you met. A heart-to-heart relationship problems aren’t helping matters. advice onboard, too. You know it makes sense. should sweep away all your worries and fears. Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3901* more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3905* more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3910*

Taurus APR 21 - May 21 Virgo Aug 24 - Sept 23 Aquarius Jan 21 - Feb 19 Tackling jobs others seem to find beyond them Find the courage to say no when someone asks Although you are sociable and love a party, you will help you gain promotion. Although your for a favour. You don’t mind helping out, but it’s can’t accept every invitation that comes your practical knowledge may be limited, you’ll pick frustrating that your boss and colleagues don’t way, so decide which is likely to be most fun. things up as you go. You won’t have a minute to realise how your own work is being neglected A partner is behaving selfishly and seems blind yourself but you’re ready for this and will love it. because of how much you are doing for others. to your needs. Be patient. They have a lot on. Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3902* more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3906* more in-depth reading on ✆ 0905 789 3911* Express Bookshop Libra Sept 24 - Oct 23 Pisces FEB 20 - Mar 20 We offer a postage-free (UK-only) mail-order service for any book Somebody could reveal their hidden side by Let your hair down and have some fun. However letting something slip in conversation. Once wacky your partner’s ideas seem, go along with in print and available in the UK, you realise they have been deceiving or using them. At work, it’s hard to concentrate and the including those mentioned in this you, let them know you are on to them. The harder you try, the worse it gets. You should be issue. Send a cheque/postal order, end of the week will be much more positive. more focused by the end of the week, though. payable to Express Bookshop, to Express Bookshop, PO Box 200, Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a Call one of my dedicated astrologers for a ✆ ✆ Falmouth TR11 4WJ, order online at more in-depth reading on 0905 789 3907* more in-depth reading on 0905 789 3912* www.expressbookshop.com or call *For Russell’s starline: Calls to starlines cost 80p per minute plus your telephone company’s network access charge – maximum of six minutes Express Bookshop on 01872 562310. duration. The service is for entertainment only. SP: Spoke 0333 202 3390

S MAGAZINE ★ 24 MARCH 2019 77 £1,000 Crossword ACROSS DOWN 1 Tiny freshwater crustacean 1 The borough of Greater that swims by means of hairy London that contains the branched antennae (5,4) Houses of Parliament and 5 Classic UK sitcom set during Buckingham Palace (11) the Second World War (4,4) 2 A jousting contest in 9 Alexander _, Scottish sailor medieval Europe (4) marooned on a South Pacific 3 A unit of length equal island and the inspiration to 220 yards (7) behind Robinson Crusoe (7) 4 Roman name for a crater 10 Actress known for her stage near Naples in Italy; once partnership with Henry Irving believed to be the entrance in the late 19th century (5,5) to the underworld (7) 11 A person who argues in 5 Bob _, acclaimed American favour of something (9) singer-songwriter who 12 A large tropical American was awarded the Nobel parrot with a long tail and Prize in Literature in 2016 (5) brilliant plumage (5) 6 Mound or ridge of drifted sand 13 _ Sikorsky, Russian-born US on the coast or in deserts (4) engineer who designed the 7 French novelist and dramatist first successful helicopter (4) whose works include 1844’s 15 Friedrich _, German social The Count Of Monte Cristo and scientist and philosopher; The Three Musketeers (9,5) coauthor with Karl Marx of 8 Town and resort on the Isle Post your solution to Competition 16072 Sunday Express General Knowledge The Communist Manifesto (6) of Thanet in Kent (7) (£1,000) Crossword, PO Box 12577, Sutton Coldfield B73 9BS, to arrive by 23:59 17 A flat, heated surface, 11 The ability to remain on Friday. Spellings and definitions are taken from the Collins English Dictionary especially on the top of calm and act constructively (12th edition out now, price £45), which is available to order from the Express a stove, for cooking food (7) in times of crisis (8,2,4) Bookshop (see page 77). For full terms, go to www.express.co.uk/comprules. 19 An optical instrument for 14 A chant of lamentation making distant objects for the dead (5) Name ______appear larger and brighter (9) 16 The flying island in Jonathan 21 American 20th-century Swift’s satirical novel Address______actor who starred in 1955’s Gulliver’s Travels (1726) (6) Rebel Without A Cause (5,4) 17 King Arthur’s nephew and a ______22 Bedrich _, Czech composer Knight of the Round Table (6) best known for his comic 18 The largest city in the US ______opera The Bartered Bride (7) state of Minnesota (11) Winners will be announced in the Sunday Afternoon section of Sunday’s newspaper in two weeks 23 Northern Ireland county 20 A cylindrical roll of tobacco famed for the geological leaves; for smoking (5) SOLUTION FOR March 17 feature, Giant’s Causeway (6) 22 A thin sheet of filled dough, B O T T I C E L L I B A H R A I N WIN 25 A distinctive air or quality rolled up and baked (7) R H M I M G B O considered characteristic 23 Peter _, medieval French £50 MYSTERY A E B N A P R I C O T S WORD BONUS of a person or thing (4) scholastic philosopher 26 A plan, sketch or drawing and theologian (7) N E G O T I A T I O N E L E Call 0907 181 2738 for C R R N D R E S S I N G a chance to win £50. Give of something (5) 24 One of a family of baleen U E G O G O L T A the answer to 20 Down, 27 Small African parrots that whales with a dorsal fin S H A M P O O S I M P U R I T Y leaving your name and are often kept in aviaries (9) and grooves along the I L C D K I O S address. Calls cost 80p per 31 The capital of Ethiopia (5,5) throat and chest (7) minute plus your telephone A D A G E E B O N N N 32 Surname of 20th-century 28 A ruminant mammal of company’s network access O L O F T V T R A I T charge and last no longer naturalist Gerald and his central African forests, B U O E A E S T than two minutes. Usual novelist brother, Lawrence (7) with horizontal white R A S P U T I N G C R O F T E R Express rules apply. For 33 Plants of the iris family, stripes on the legs (5) A H D W E L L E O full terms go to express. with sword-shaped leaves 29 A starchy cereal obtained co.uk/comptc. The winner M O U S S A K A S O L T will be chosen from all and spikes of funnel-shaped, from the powdered pith of B X P N A T I O N A L I S T correct entries received by brightly coloured flowers (8) a palm, used for puddings L I L L I P U T A T I E 23:59 on Saturday. The 34 Officials engaged in the and as a thickening agent (4) E E L S P I N R editor’s decision is final. conduct of the relations of 30 The sixth letter of the S C Y T H E S C O P E R N I C U S SP: Spoke, 0333 202 3390. one state with another (9) Greek alphabet (4)

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