“The Pulse of THE DISRESPECTA OR the Student The Stuyvesant UniversityT Newspaper Bodyodyody”
Volume ??? No. ?? IDK Time is a Social Construct stuyspec.org
DISRESPECTATOR DISRESPECTATOR To All the Objects We Left In Our Sample Letter of Continued Interest to Lockers Get You off the Harvard Waitlist From gym clothes to a photo of a bald teacher, we reminisced While on the waitlist for all eight Ivy League colleges, here is yet about the beloved objects that we left in our lockers. Here another Stuy Kid’s e-mail to show that they are still interested in are our love letters to them. the college. see page 30 see page 31
DISRESPECTATOR CONTENT ON PAGES 1-4 AND 29-32 HUMORBEAT SING!? More Like SEUNG! The Stuyvesant building collapsed inward due to By AARON WANG, KELLY how important it is for us to your lamentable romantic “god.” I have been blessed by the lack of in-person at- YIP,and KAREN ZHANG continue to work together to life, mediocre essays, and something divine. Perhaps it tendance. improve our theatrical skills. everything in between. I wish is destiny. This is why I have Seung Yu
feated this season. these tough times. One of Courtesy of Photoshop people. This is why we must my beliefs as an educator is adapt to the large SEUNG! Escalators still break that we all need cheerlead- change. It is especially im- down despite lack of stu- ers to help us along our path. portant to improve the cur- Therefore, I am declaring rent quality of Stuyvesant dents. that SING! this year will be entertainment. renamed to SEUNG! the Ex- As I eagerly wait for the The Student Union re- travaganza and I will be ap- first rays of the rising sun to vises its Speed-Friending pointing you as my personal shine through my window so Platform to Speed-Dat- cheerleaders to accompany competitor at SEUNG! so you will share one of many rev- that God’s blazing hand can ing. Love is real. me along my path toward can all see what a real show elations. Yu is the beginning guide mine across the sea Stuyvesant Principal Great- looks like. of the name of the popular of good scriptwriting, I have Students are now re- ness. First and foremost, I trading card game, Yu-Gi-Oh. started my own adventure. quired to wear PE uni- I am grateful to be a part am working on prioritizing I’m sure that you also know of Behold! forms for their online of the SEUNG! fervor, al- my most important tasks the classic game “Uno.” “Uno” beit virtually. After reading so that I don’t always feel is spelled with three letters, classes to build commu- the SING! scripts from past overwhelmed, unsuccessful, just like the word “dog,” and nity. years, I thought deeply about or guilty. I imagine many of there is no coincidence that this year’s SING! season and you feel the same way about “dog” spelled backward is continued on page 2
A Survivor’s Account of the The Spectator Stuyvesant Civil War Scavenger Hunt By LIESEL WONG and your morning announcements! sive? No more shorts that CYRUS CURSETJEE Do your keys keep disappear- add 10 pounds? I looked ing after you leave the house around. Everybody in the Dear Reader, BBC Interviewer: Could each morning? Well, it turns classroom was whisper- you please introduce your- out that the Stuyvesant Key ing. I think everyone knew Welcome to The Spectator’s Scavenger Hunt! Lit- self to the camera? Club has had them all along what I knew—that this was tered around the pages of Disrespectator content are *The camera pans to a and is asking you to come pick our chance to have my club ragged 17-year-old blankly them up next Monday at 4:00 dominate the school. I was clues that will lead you to spell out a link to The Specta- staring into the distance p.m. in Room 231, where it part of the Stuyvesant Anti- tor website for exclusive content. outside a vandalized TriBeCa will coincidentally be holding Club Club. Immediately after Bridge.* its interest meeting. Addi- class, we assembled to dis- The structure of the link is as follows: ______. Juliuseses Grant: Hi, my tionally, the Physical Educa- cuss our design for the uni- com/___/___/___-___-___-___-___-___. name Juliuseses Grant, and I tion Department will be ac- form competition. We needed am a survivor of the Stuyves- cepting submissions for next a shirt that would best push ant Civil War. year’s design of Stuyvesant’s our anti-club agenda. We de- To help you find the words that correspond to each *Insert a montage of ru- Gym Uniform! Submissions cided on a truly revolutionary of the blanks, you will be given a clue in the form of a ins and piles of school equip- are due at 11:59 p.m. on April design: the word clubs with a rebus or puzzle. The clue will spell out a topic or title ment all over the Stuyvesant 29th. Designs can be submit- large, red “X” over it. I sent related to a specific article in one of the eight pages building: shattered windows, ted to [email protected]. the submission to udaboss@ of The Disrespectator. When you find the article, look smeared ketchup packets, The winner will be decided stuy.edu immediately after. for the bolded letters in the first few paragraphs of textbooks without covers, based on a democratic vote Club Member 1: It’s per- broken desks, and ripped-up by the student body. fect. A guaranteed win. the article that will spell out a word. At the end of the papers.* Liesel Wong: “And now, BBC Interviewer: You re- article, look for the clue that will take you to the next Juliuseses Grant: It all for the morning joke: Cyrus, ally forgot the name of your article. started with the morning an- does February like March?” club members? nouncement on March 29th. Cyrus Cursetjee: “I don’t Juliuseses Grant: Yes. Your first clue awaits:樂 + en ️ + en ❓ It was a Friday… know, but April May.” Names are a construct. *Cue flashback* Liesel Wong: “Hahaha.” *Juliuseses turns away Juliuseses Grant: The Cyrus Cursetjee: “Ha.” and drips a splotch of red ink Have fun and happy reading, day, as always, started with *The speaker is abruptly on his bald head.* The Spectator Editorial Board the morning announcement: cut off.* “Also, I got shot during “Gooood morning Stuyves- Juliuseses Grant: I the war and lost my memory.” *Answers on page 32 ant! We are your student couldn’t stop thinking about announcers, Liesel Wong and the gym uniform submissions. Cyrus Cursetjee, and here are No more bright orange cur- continued on page 2 Page 2 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Disrespectator
SING!? More Like SEUNG! rently waiting for the sun to Yeah, life goes on like this tice me? Perhaps you wonder YU continued from page 1 rise. My journal is within my again. as well. Why are you taking Excellence is a discipline, grasp. The sun edges over AP Chem? Why are you not not a performance. --- the horizon. The birds must [He stands up and opens pursuing your dream of be- Therefore, I resign from SCENE 1 be awoken. I have my journal his arms toward the ceiling, ing an artist? Why have you SEUNG! [On the dim stage, the in hand, ready to conquer the before sharply flinging his not reconciled with your lost lone Yu rests, dressed in his day. And everyone else. journal into the audience. An friendships? Why have you LQ 3: BLACKOUT high school football uniform, audience member lets out a not taken a moment to re- END OF SCENE 1 assuming the hunched posi- yelp.] alize that there is more to --- tion of a Swan Lake perform- your life than numbers on a But these are just some of er.] YU report card? That you are my thoughts. This is a work I’m too cool for school. you, and nothing will change in progress, and it requires LQ 1: SPOTLIGHT ON YU that? What’s for dinner to- everyone to be on board, so [Suddenly, he lifts his SONG 1.2: Cue 2 Cool 4 night? What do men want? I would appreciate it if you head, and his forehead glis- Skool (feat. DJ Friz) Here are some guiding words could provide some feedback. DANCE CUE 2: COM- of wisdom: tens in the spotlight.] Courtesy of Photoshop MENCE VERY HIP MOVES Cause I-I-I’m in the Remember that if you YU school tonight have any questions or con- My number one advice? [The music stops sud- So watch me bring the cerns about my well-being, I The most important relation- denly. He strikes a dramatic heat and set the SEUNG! have Office Hours today. ship in life is the one you have pose. He takes a pair of glass- alight (hey) with yourself. And that’s why es out of his pocket. He puts Photosynthesizing with a Topic: Office Hours I’m going to tell you the sto- them on slowly. He pushes little punk and spaz (4:30-4:50 a.m.) ry of my life! [He opens his journal, sits his glasses up his nose with So I will light it up like dy- Join Zoom Meeting down on stage, and looks into his middle finger. The lenses namite, whoa oh oh https://us02web.zoom. SONG 1.1: “Story of My the audience.] shine a bright light.] us/comesupportseung!theext Life” by One Direction [He runs toward the front ravaganza DANCE CUE 1: YU There are many challeng- LQ 2: LIGHT BLUE of the stage and long jumps Meeting ID: 123 456 FLOSSES FOR FOUR MIN- es and joys we experience LIGHTS over the orchestra pit onto 7890 UTES AND SIX SECONDS. on a daily basis, and times the floor below. He runs to- Passcode: seungsuprem- for reflection can help you YU ward the back of the theater acy YU parse out what is important. [Dramatic Reading] and high-fives himself. He Good morning, my friends. However, I have been think- I sometimes wonder stands in the back and holds Have a productive and I have awoken before the ing. Oh to be, “an echo in the about the purpose of every- up his BTS lightstick.] amaSEUNG! day! sun has risen. The birds forest,” an “arrow in the blue thing. Why am I your princi- Principal (and ex-Coordi- are still sleeping. I am cur- sky.” To be a pillow or table. pal? Will Jungkook ever no- nator) Yu The Case Against a A Survivor’s Account of the Nap Period Stuyvesant Civil War By ASA MUHAMMAD signments in math because the hallways. Crushed food part of Track Team territo- I had to go to naptime and continued from page 1 litters the ground. Almost ry. They launched the attack Students of Stuyvesant I couldn’t do it earlier be- every square footage of by using one of the hallway High School are known to cause I was procrastinat- *The interviewer eyes the space is covered in ripped benches as a battering ram, be chronically tired. They ing.’ Inconceivable. I value ink jar in Juliuseses’s hand.* posters. It smells distinctly breaking through the door take their sleep in install- my procrastination time, BBC Interviewer: Sure! of expired milk.* to expose the thoroughly ments, and the payments and plus, even if I miss a Juliuseses Grant: Anyway, BBC Interviewer: But shocked Track Team. Both always seem to come late. few nap classes, I should the situation quickly esca- what was the last straw? battalions fought inside the The oft proposed solution get extra credit for being lated. The Physical Education Who was the Archduke Fer- weight room using hula hoops is that we institute a nap- so slept on––this is going Department received over dinand? and flip flops. The battle end- time. While this idea sounds in Spec, right? Yo, check 200 submissions for the uni- Juliuseses Grant: Well, ed in a substantial amount wonderful in concept––a out my Soundclou—” junior form design. Because there the Student Union wanted to of property damage and a was one month left before take out its biggest competi- victory for the Track Team, blissful period to doze off Preston Zheng said. tor. They decided to cut off who enjoyed what was left and delight yourself in the His sentiment is a popular the election date, a lot of clubs took this as an oppor- funding for the STC, accusing of their weight room. This hypnosis of the diurnal si- one, but the issue extends them of “not meeting the re- haphazard battle caught the esta––Stuyvesant would, in far beyond in-class atten- tunity to promote their de- signs. Students came up with quirement of monthly meet- attention of the NYPD, which true “Pro dolor, aegritudo, dance. If naptime were to all sorts of methods to get as ings scheduled on StuyAc- sent police officers to moni- nobis” fashion, find a way to assign homework (which it many votes as possible: they tivities.” STC was outraged, tor the escalating situation. ruin it. most definitely would, con- handed out stickers, cookies, and they united with SING! However, they quickly lost Firstly, if a formal nap- sidering that our lack of flyers, cash, sushi, puppies— members to write a play pro- control when the Communist time were to be instituted, commute time frees up valu- nothing was off-limits. testing the Student Union. Club imported guns and artil- even though napping is con- able working hours), it would Teachers started picking During the final performance lery from “The Motherland” sidered one of the most elu- almost immediately become sides in an effort to boost of the play, a member of the and decided to distribute sive arts to master, it would a crutch for overwhelmed their favorite uniform. The SU shouted “What is that them evenly amongst all the be a gym class (due to sleep students. Excuses like “I’m Spanish Teachers formed a mysterious ticking noise?” in competing clubs. As for the having to do with our health sorry my paper is late, but coalition and offered large a voice like that of Severus Anti-Club Club, we fell into a or something). This isn’t my sleep assignment took a amounts of extra credit to Snape and promptly threw a verbal altercation with the inherently bad, but with little longer than I thought” students who voted for the glitter bomb onto the stage. Debate Club when we ac- the varying quality of gym would become all too com- “Día de Los Muertos” uniform, The Stuyvesant Civil War cused them of pushing their teachers, you may have one mon, or conversely, students which included a skeleton ma- had started. radical clubist agenda to of our more “authoritarian” would just lie on their sleep- riachi band, a sombrero, and After the glitter explo- gain votes. However, we fell instructors proctoring your ing logs like they lie on their shorts made of papel picado. sion and the ensuing havoc, into internal conflict after 55 minutes of what should gym logs. 4:00 a.m submis- Economics teachers lowered STC and SING! (now the the Debate Club pointed out be bliss. Whether they’re sions would become signs of test scores and equaled the Drama Club), slept in shifts that we ourselves are also a demanding you remove your a good night’s rest rather Spanish Department’s extra to maintain their control of club. Despite all the violence, hoodie because this is “still than a good day’s work. (The credit, thereby forcing stu- the now sparkly auditorium, the war was at a stalemate. dents to support their inflat- their new base of operations. Hardly any faction of the a real class,” or insisting Spectator does not condone The Music Department occu- school managed to dominate you keep your camera on “to lying on your gym logs. In able “inflation shirts” for the sake of their grades. History pied the band room. The ro- a large area for an extended make sure you’re practicing fact, if you do, you’re a dis- botics team drove around the period of time. proper side sleeping form,” grace. I’m so dedicated that teachers, claiming the brib- ery of other departments second floor in scrappy, mal- The war came to an end the tiny terror and Doctor I can do two days of exer- resembled the strategies of functioning cars. Other clubs when Kung Fu Tea, after Sleep would do everything cise in the 10 minutes after political machines, promptly soon populated the remaining hearing of this long-drawn in their power to make this the form is posted.) shored up support for a t- real estate. conflict, reopened their old exercise in tranquility as In conclusion, the en- shirt with Cornell Notes on Once every region in location and proposed a bub- stressful as possible. tire premise of naptime “How to Do History Home- the building was occupied, ble tea gym uniform design Beyond the risk of night- would be undermined by the work during PE.” a frenzy of unique battles of their own. Juniors and Se- marish teachers, our stu- overworked students who The tension over the cho- commenced. The first nota- niors, who had been suffer- dent body just does not begged for it in the first sen uniform divided everyone ble battle was between the ing from withdrawal symp- have a sleep positive cul- place. Naptime would be and split the school into fac- Chess Club and the Board toms ever since the Kung Fu ture. Naptime sounds like a a sanctuary from the om- tions. Teachers, students, Games Club. The Chess Club Tea’s closing two years ago, dream, but students would nipresent stresses of our custodians, and even the developed a war tactic that all flocked to the store. The indubitably cut nap class to school, but unfortunately, Principal would do anything involved sacrificing “pawns” rest of the school stopped finish their assignments due Stuyvesant scoffs at Hyp- just for a vote for the design to capture its opposition’s fighting, and the Kung Fu T- next period. nos in favor of the Algea, of their choice. Friendships members and hold them hos- Shirt won by a massive mar- “Well if I have two pages patrons of our sorrow. were broken, pencils were tage. Their battle received gin. They even said one lucky of physics due next period, lost. The atmosphere was un- a short feature on NBC be- student would receive a free there’s no way I’m going to easy. Stuyvesant was getting fore the Chess Club offered bubble tea coupon with their a draw. The Swim Team at- sleep class. What are they war + f (-h) ready for war. going to do? Fail me? ‘Sorry *Documentary cuts to a tempted to expand into the continued on page 4 mom, I’m missing three as- scene of students yelling in weight room, which was a The Spectator • April 6, 2021 Page 3 Disrespectator The Editorial Board Predicts Each Other’s Future By THE EDITORIAL BOARD The future is looking bright for the 2020 - 2021 Spectator Editorial Board! Here are the editors 20 years into the future: Matt Melucci / The Spectator Adrianna Peng / The Spectator Afra Mahmud / The Spectator Shreyasi Saha Gavin McGinley Suah Chung Kenisha Mahajan / The Spectator Raven Tang / The Spectator Clara Shapiro
Krish Gupta Kelly Yip / The Spectator Sophie Poget / The Spectator Susie McKnight / The Spectator Sonya Sasson Dexter Wells
Raymond Yang
See the full spread here: Francesca Nemati / The Spectator Sonya Sasson / The Spectator Momoca Mairaj Tina Nguyen Page 4 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Disrespectator Breaking News! Freshmen From Homeroom 1KK Flee Stuyvesant By EZRA LEE throughout the school that Days before the incident, anonymous Big Sib said. “And all parents and students to un- the principal loves K-pop, the the freshman couple report- I guess they chose Alabama.” derstand that the Big Sib Pro- A freshman couple from principal refutes these so- edly talked to their assigned Several parents have gram never has and never will Homeroom 1KK fled the called “absurd” claims. “Lies! homeroom Big Sib. When voiced their concerns about tolerate this type of behavior Stuyvesant High School build- I love those groups, but I asked what the best possible the news. “We expect the Big from any of its members.” ing on Thursday, April 1, 2021, would never sing their songs action they should take should Sib program to be role mod- The program has also up- during third period of blended in the Stuyvesant building, be, the anonymous junior Big els for our precious children,” dated various parts of their learning. The duo was discov- at least not publicly! I was said one distraught freshman application for their new re- ered in Montgomery, Alabama, simply practicing for my parent. “How can we trust cruitment season this year. on April 3 at approximately audition for Big Hit next the Big Sibs and ad- “We now require all potential 2:00 a.m. According to offi- week,” Yu said. “I ministrators if they and current Big Sibs to sign cial FBI records, the couple will, however, ad- couldn’t even stop a contract that states that was staying at an inn and was mit that I was two cousins from they will alert us and admin- discovered when one of their the one who running istrators whenever a Little parents received an email opened the away to Ala- Sib shows signs of deser- about an excessive amount of window. To bama to hook tion, unusual sexual behavior, money being spent on a credit all the par- up with each and murderous intent, just in card to pay for the couple’s ents and other?” case,” one of the new Big Sib room, as well as some lotion, students, I The Big Chairs said in a Zoom inter- classified pills, a belt, a flash- sincerely Sib Chairs view. light, and a packet of balloons. apologize.” have also com- The freshman couple is It is unclear what their inten- Though mented on currently safe after being es- tions were with those items. The Specta- this situation, corted back to New York by They will remain anonymous in tor was un- as there was the FBI. They will be spending this article in order to protect able to inter- much criticism all free periods with Mr. Brian their identities. view and find concerning how Moran, a dean at Stuyvesant Through a thorough inves- the true inten- the Big Sib in ques- High School. “I don’t particu- tigation, it’s been discovered tions of the couple due tion handled the situ- larly enjoy babysitting cousins that the couple used a well- to them being banned from ation and how the Big Sib and making sure they don’t known escape route in one of talking to anyone, there even got their position in the kiss each other in my room, the staircases. “Yeah, on the are many speculations Yume Igarashi /first The Spectator place.“We’ve investi- but it has to be done,” Moran second floor around second spreading around the build- Sib told gated the situation and found said. “I also want to emphasize or third period, Principal Yu ing. “I heard that their par- them to that the Big Sib involved in that I discourage all Stuyves- opens the window while singing ents never approved of their run away. “I thought they the recent scandal actually ant students from running along to some K-pop. When I relationship because they’re were joking when they said got their position through away from school. You’ll end was around there a week ago, first cousins. That’s why they that they wanted to run away bribery. A past Big Sib Chair up sitting with me and a photo he was singing to Red Velvet’s fled to Alabama because it’s from all the ‘pressures and received a $10 Starbucks gift of my family during lunch as I ‘Psycho’ and BTS’s ‘Dynamite,’” more socially acceptable to expectations of society.’ I as- card in exchange for a seat in gossip about you to my fellow said an anonymous junior. “The date your own relative there. sumed they were talking about the program. The involved Big staff, and trust me, you don’t freshies probably jumped off Isn’t that so romantic? It’s their hatred for Freshman Bi- Sib will be removed from their want to hear that.” the floor and safely hit the like the classic Romeo and Ju- ology, so I told them to run position immediately,” the Big grass when Principal Yu left to liet story,” said an anonymous away to the closest state with Sib Chairs wrote on a recent go to the bathroom.” sophomore, a supporter of the worst education so life Facebook post in the Dear In- While it is commonly known this couple. could be easier, as a joke,” the coming 2024 group. “We want
Mobile Game Ads: An American Tragedy A By ELIZABETH BLACK turned out to be children’s their evil creations. been lied to. Other ads seem Survivor’s games that didn’t give me Aside from being mis- to aim to annoy the potential It is no secret that mo- any money but instead asked leading, mobile game ads are customer through various bile game creators have used for my own. Naturally, the easily the most annoying and tactics: some pretend to be Account some questionable practices creators’ hope is that some cringe-worthy type of adver- an interactive sample of the to earn as much money as eight-year-old will make all tisement with the ability to game but bring the player to possible in the rapidly grow- in-app purchases necessary ruin anyone’s day instantly; the download page instead. of the ing market. Loot boxes, pay- to succeed in the game and it’s imperative that the gov- Others leave the audience to-win tactics, and other receive the promised Pay- ernment take action against staring at one photo for 30 techniques have helped mo- Pal reward. Thankfully, I’m the havoc these ads are seconds with little content Stuyvesant bile games evolve from a slightly smarter than an wreaking on society. Their about the game. They’re market that focused on cre- made with no effort. Some ating enjoyable games into occasionally do not have au- Civil War one focused solely on profit dio, and the same characters and quick consumer acquisi- and content are used to de- tion. In an attempt to make pict several completely dif- continued from page 2 elementary schoolers spend ferent games. their parents’ money on After much thought gym uniform. How could any- mobile games, develop- and research, however, one pass up something like ers have created some I’ve come up with a theo- that? advertisements that ry as to why the ads are BBC Interviewer: What are downright dreadful. so poor. Most of these happened after? An interesting de- ads show up in other mo- Juliuseses Grant: Under velopment is that these bile games, which usually the judgment of the DOE, ads have progressed have a purchase option Stuy siphoned much of the into none other than available to disable fur- club funding into repairing false advertising to ther ads. Perhaps these the damages done to the cover up their poor de- companies have given building. All the students sign. After constantly up on selling consumers were forced to disband their seeing Homescapes ads their games and instead factions and return to nor- filled with character drama want the player to despise malcy. Sadly, the administra- and mini-games, I decided to having to keep watching the tion decided that the bubble download the game for the ads and make the purchase tea uniform wasn’t represen- purpose of this article. Of necessary to avoid it. These tative of our school, so we course, it was the millionth ad companies aren’t trying to were subjected to the ulti- “Match 3” game on the mar- market any other game but mate punishment: the original ket and exceptionally bor- Julia Shen / The Spectator rather increase purchases gym uniform. On the bright ing with none of the “drama” eight-year-old and deleted ridiculous taglines, such as for the one a player has al- side, Kung Fu Tea returned from the ads. I’ll never get both games immediately. “only one percent can reach ready downloaded. and we are actually grate- back the full three minutes Not only are these false the top,” “noob vs. pro,” and Overall, mobile game ad- ful for the delicious nectar I spent before deleting it. advertising and scamming even “mom vs. dad,” make me vertisements are a menace of the gods. We’re ensuring Meanwhile, even more practices frustrating and irrationally angry. How any- to society. If we track down that the store never closes desperate game develop- evil, but they’re also illegal. one, even an eight-year-old, the people making them, we down again. ers have started to rely According to the Federal can look at these ads and can relieve ourselves of this BBC Interviewer: It on pure scams in their ads. Trade Commission, ads that want to download the app is pressing issue. They can’t sounds like a dream. I have seen countless ads leave out crucial information beyond me. stop all of us. We need to Juliuseses Grant: It’s that show someone playing or simply lie are considered While I’m no marketing rise up, call our represen- not… the game and then random- false advertising and are expert, these ads do not use tatives, and protest mobile *Juliuseses Grant pres- ly receiving money through strictly prohibited by the the right methods to target game ads. We are the revo- ents some bubble tea to the PayPal simply for playing. U.S. government. We can customers. The ones that lution. camera.* Since it sounded too good only hope that the people are well-designed but mis- to be true, I sacrificed my behind mobile game ads will leading may bring in down- dignity for my curiosity and be behind bars sometime loads, but too many people downloaded not one, but soon, in which case we can all will quickly abandon the game two of these games. Both celebrate our freedom from once they realize they’ve “The Pulse of the Student Body” The SpectatorThe Stuyvesant High School Newspaper
Volume 111 No. 13 April 6, 2021 stuyspec.com SCIENCE ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT “Why You Should Continue Taking “A (Wanda)Vision of Success” Notes By Hand” A&E writers Asa Muhammed and Samira Esha discuss Science writer Riona Anvekar explains the scientific expla- the global television phenomenon “WandaVision,” a me- nation behind why taking notes by hand helps us retain and ticulously planned and executed TV event that proves once understand information better. again why Marvel remains so pervasive in our culture. see page 19 see page 23
Pandemic Prompts Dr. Lisa Greenwald Leads Regents Examinations the Ellington Project Cancelation By JANNA WANG, JUNI they were trying to help,” she Dr. Greenwald started con- PARK, SAKURA YAMANA- said. tributing by cooking a meal By SAKURA YAMANAKA, and juniors would take the KA, MAGGIE SANSONE, She garnered inspiration for Hotel Ellington each week. MAGGIE SANSONE, MI- Physics and English Regents and RIFATH HOSSAIN to start the Ellington Project From here, the project grew CHELLE LU, and MAHIR if not taken in previous years. quickly as she spread the word HOSSAIN This year, the only exams that in her neighborhood by hang- will be administered are those Since the beginning of spring 2020, history teacher ing flyers to inform the com- The Board of Regents an- necessary to fulfill the federal munity that she was collect- nounced the cancelation of requirement to test students at Dr. Lisa Greenwald has led the Ellington Project, which ing donations for the shelter. all Regents exams this school least once in ELA, math, and “There’s a lot of disparity in year with the exception of four science. delivers food, clothing, toys, Many teachers were unsur- and toiletries to the home- the city. There are people who subjects—English, Algebra I, have too little and people who Earth Science, and Living En- prised by the cancelation. “We less shelter Hotel Ellington. vironment—on March 15. The were all expecting it to happen. The building, now managed have more than enough, and four tests will be administered We were just anxious for them by New York City’s Depart- the people who have more in person this June. to make a decision and commu- ment of Homeless Services, than enough are frequently In compliance with New nicate it as quickly as possible,” has been serving the homeless more willing to give to the York State graduation require- Assistant Principal of Math- community for over 19 years. people who have less, they just ments, public school students ematics Eric Smith said in an Dr. Greenwald has recruited don’t know how. So this is a must pass five Regents exams: e-mail interview. 120 volunteers to help col- way to do it. And that gives me one English Language Arts While non-AP core classes lect various donations for the a lot of satisfaction, to be that shelter. Some have donated conduit,” she said. “If I just
(ELA), math, science, and so- at Stuyvesant are structured to Courtesy of Lisa Greenwald Dr. cial studies, as well as an addi- prepare students for the Re- money, cooked, or baked food cooked the meal, [that] would tional exam in another subject. gents, many teachers believe to contribute. from her cousin, who worked be okay, but what we’re doing Under normal circumstances, the cancelation will have little Dr. Greenwald started the as an X-ray technician at a local now is much bigger than that.” New York State would offer impact on how these classes initiative in March 2020 after hospital at the time. “I started Through her work and Regents exams in 10 subject are conducted. “Students at New York City public schools thinking that well if my cousin that of others, Dr. Greenwald areas. Freshmen would take Stuy[vesant] are motivated by closed. “I remember reading can be doing that and risking expressed the more welcom- the Geometry Regents, sopho- more than a Regents exam, about how things were getting his life every day, I should get ing atmosphere that the com- mores would take the Chemis- worse for a variety of people off my butt and do something for other people,” Dr. Green- try, Global History and Geog- continued on page 8 and I was inspired to read continued on page 8 raphy, and Algebra II Regents, about other people and how wald said.
NEWSBEAT Dr. Winkel Hosts First Virtual Cultural Exchange PSAL Sports resumed on April 5. Event By ISABELLA JIA and KAI Sina, who gave introductory other countries,” Dr. Winkel bustling city and towering sky- CAOTHIEN speeches to students. Stuyves- said. “It was very interesting. scrapers,” Lu said in an e-mail The annual Stuyvesant ant students then performed a They always talked about where interview. Spring Fest will be held vir- For music teacher Dr. musical piece to welcome AGB they are from, their hometowns, Chen created a video of tually on April 17. Gregor Winkel, hosting a cul- students, followed by videos what their favorite foods are, fa- her neighborhood, Woodside, tural exchange event for his created by students from the re- vorite music, etc.” Queens, and showcased her band students has always been spective schools. These videos This activity engaged stu- German speaking skills. “Un- featured different school envi- dents and ultimately devel- like the other videos, mine was Sophomore Raven Tang a dream. Remote learning pre- delivered a speech at a New sented an opportunity for him ronments, foods, and activities oped into a plan for a cultural in German. I initially took on York Road Runners (NYRR) to do so. “I almost always want- from German and American exchange event. “I thought this project because I thought it town hall as a Rising NYRR ed to do something like this, cultures. Students had the op- maybe we could take it up a was a great opportunity for me Youth Ambassador. but it was always obstructed by portunity to converse after each step further and ask [students] to practice my German speak- physical practicalities. Usually, video. The end was reserved for if we could do [a] cultural ex- ing skills, having taken German when you have an exchange, sharing contact information. change through Zoom. There for the past four years,” Chen the guest students stay with the Winkel chose to collabo- was a school up in Germany said in an e-mail interview. Junior Angela Cai won first host family, but that is some- rate with AGB because of his and they were all in for it. We A challenge students en- place in the Association for personal connections to the had four students: [senior] Jen- countered in the video-making Women in Mathematics’ Es- thing difficult to do in New say Contest. York City,” Dr. Winkel said. school. “I was thinking of sev- ny Chen, [sophomore] Emily process, however, was convey- “Since I’m teaching virtually, eral connections I have to Ger- Lu, [sophomore] Eduardo Lo- ing humor properly. “Honestly, soon this came to the extent of many. The daughter of my old- zano, and [senior] Filip Marko- humor doesn’t translate well my vision and I thought maybe est brother went to [AGB] and vinovic make wonderful videos, over languages or culture, so I Junior Cynthia Tan and it would be an option.” graduated from there,” Winkel [while] other students collected was a little worried over making sophomores Eugene Yoo Dr. Winkel’s fourth pe- said. questions they wanted to ask,” certain jokes and references in and Sophia Wan-Brodsky riod concert band students The event came about when Winkel said. These videos were my narration,” Lu said. performed in the final round participated in a cultural ex- Dr. Winkel’s students showed presented by AGB students and However, many AGB stu- for the Lincoln Center change event with students an interest in his German eth- Stuyvesant students to show- dents responded positively. “I Young Musicians Innova- nicity. “They started off ask- case cultural and lifestyle differ- also appreciate the humor that . from Abtei-Gymnasium Brau- tion Challenge weiler (AGB), a high school ing me in class where I’m from ences between New York City was clearly noticeable and that located in Pulheim, Germany, and I started showing them in and Germany. all videos showed,” senior and on March 16. The event started Google Earth where I’m from. Students wanted to high- AGB student Carolin Elena Senior Keyvon Maybody off with guest speakers Princi- After I did that, I asked students light New York through a non- Kaminski said in an e-mail in- and junior Bryan Zhang pal Seung Yu, German Consul if they wanted to do the same, stereotypical lens. “Through my terview. are both qualifiers for the of German Embassy in NYC so we started to give each other video, I wanted to convey that Other students also found Physics Olympiad. Herr David Gill, and Direk- tours of places we were from, there were many different as- tor (principal) of AGB Martin such as Egypt, Italy, and several pects of New York besides the continued on page 6 Page 6 The Spectator• April 6, 2021 News Robert Sandler Hosts Three American History Guest Speakers By EUGENE YOO, NADA Sandler noticed the topic was really helping me realize how HAMEED,and RUIWEN similar to those that were much I enjoy history, so having (RAVEN) TANG taught in class and decided to more professors and research- invite Dallek to talk about it. “I ers come in and talk about History teacher Robert thought it would be interesting their work is really fascinating. Sandler hosted guest speakers because I saw a lot of material I would totally love to listen Courtesy of Wikimedia Commons and NASA Amity Shlaes on February 10, in the article that drew parallels to more if Sandler can get any WORLDBEAT Matthew Dallek on March 4, to Q-Anon,” Sandler said. “The teacher.” and Brian Rosenwald on March John Birch Society was afraid Others hope to continue 9, over Zoom. With a turnout that America was going to fall learning more about topics of roughly 70 students, the to communism. It seems like in that are not normally taught Eight people, six of whom were Asian American females, events offered opportunities various times of American his- or known after attending the were killed in a shooting at three spas in Atlanta, Georgia, on for students to learn about the tory, there’s this paranoid fringe events. “I liked it a lot. I think March 16. government and media during of people with these extreme, it was a hit,” Brovender said. “I the 1900s from experts in ad- right-wing beliefs.” would definitely attend more of dition to the American history Sandler also felt that Dallek’s these in the future, even if extra curriculum taught in class. presentation had a positive im- credit wasn’t attached. I would 10 people were killed in a shooting at a grocery store in Boul- Sandler first invited Am- pact on students as they learned love to see specialists on sub- der, Colorado, on March 22. ity Shlaes, who is a mover about Dallek’s research process. jects that I don’t know about and shaker of the Calvin “What made it so cool was that because it gets me interested.” Coolidge Presidential Founda- he showed the kids the pro- Rosenwald felt that the vir- tion. Sandler noted that Calvin cess,” Sandler said. “The kids tual nature of the event provid- Coolidge, the 30th president thought it was cool to see all ed him the opportunity to guest New York State officials reached a deal tolegalize recreational of the United States, is usually the documents, to see all the re- speak for students. “If such marijuana that is likely to come into effect in more than a year. known as a president who did search, and they also really liked talks were in person, they’d end nothing. “Think about great the back-and-forth Q&A. They up being both cost-prohibitive presidents: Lincoln emancipat- asked questions like how it was (for the school) and time pro- ed the slaves, FDR had the New similar to Q-Anon, how it was hibitive for me because of the Deal, LBJ worked on civil rights different, so I thought that was travel involved,” he said. North Korea launched two ballistic missiles as a warning and had the Voting Rights Act really great.” Dallek expressed a similar against President Joe Biden. [...] and Coolidge. He’s basically Finally, Sandler invited sentiment. “Though I always famous for not doing much. Brian Rosenwald, a profes- prefer to teach and talk with That’s the way the textbooks sor at the University of Penn- students in person over virtual, sylvania, to discuss his book the use of Zoom actually made describe him,” Sandler said. Dr. Rachel Levine is the first openlytransgender person to be However, Sandler knew that “Talk Radio’s America: How the event far more feasible,” he Shlaes, who had written a book an Industry Took Over a Po- said. “I live in Washington, D.C. confirmed by the U.S. Senate for a federal position as the As- about Coolidge, had a different litical Party That Took Over and it’s possible that the wide- sistant Secretary for Health. perspective—that Coolidge was the United States,” which was spread reliance on Zoom made an underrated and a great presi- about conservative talk radio it easier for Mr. Sandler to reach dent—and he believed that her and American radio personality out and ask me to participate.” viewpoint would be interesting Rush Limbaugh’s legacy on the Due to the large turnout, to share with his students. “The conservative party and the me- the events faced time con- Similarly, Dallek felt that more about not just history it- kids liked it. They thought it dia. “[Limbaugh] basically ex- straints and unanswered ques- the event was overall success- self but also how it is formed was interesting to be [...] con- pressed the grievances that a lot tions. “The kids sometimes had ful. “I greatly enjoyed talking and why it matters. “I hope fronted by a conservative intel- of white men of the conserva- a lot of questions to ask but with the students. They asked that students took away a sense lectual who had radically differ- tive working-class felt: that they there was not enough time,” terrific questions, offered lively of how historians attempt to ent views than those they were were ignored, that their voices Sandler said. “You got to think comments, and seemed really puzzle together thousands of used to, the way the textbook were being silenced by the cul- of it like this: it was 70 people engaged with questions about primary documents, engage portrayed, the way I taught it,” tural leads, the left, and how it versus three.” the John Birch Society and the with the secondary literature, Sandler said. “It was really valu- would dominate our culture,” Despite this, Sandler felt legacy of the far-right and ex- and attempt to weave a the- able for them.” Sandler said. “And I don’t even satisfied with the events as stu- tremism in modern American matic narrative that provides Sandler also invited Mat- think he’s in our textbooks, yet dents were able to learn new history,” he said. “A number new knowledge and contributes thew Dallek, a professor from he’s had such a great influence material from the professors. “I of students stayed late to ask to our collective understanding George Washington Univer- on the Republican party, ac- got overwhelmingly really posi- me questions as well, and there of history and why history mat- sity, after reading an article that cording to this historian.” tive feedback,” Sandler said. “It seemed to be substantial in- ters,” he said. Dallek wrote for The Washing- Through the three guest was so exciting to hear about terest in the issue of how the Rosenwald added, “[I] want- ton Post about the John Birch speaker events, many students the whole process of interviews Republican Party became so ed to expose [the] part of poli- Society (JBS). Dallek is current- enjoyed the presentations and and [Rosenwald] actually played extreme, how Trumpism came tics that is usually submerged ly writing a book about the JBS, felt that they gained greater in- clips from Rush Limbaugh’s to be, and how the John Birch for most people so that maybe which was a group of right- sight into history. “The lectures shows. It was exciting for me Society and other ‘extremist’ or- they’d understand better how wing extremists who believed were really interesting and some because I do new things every ganizations cast a shadow over our politics got to be so frac- that America was succumbing of them had presentations go year. The last two were new and our own times.” tious. And I hope I achieved my to communism. Though the along with them,” junior Ca- I think they were very very suc- As a guest speaker, Dallek objective, but only the audience JBS is not covered in textbooks, dence Li said. “Stuyvesant is cessful.” hoped that students learned knows for sure.”
Dr. Winkel Hosts First Virtual Cultural Exchange Event playing a really classical piece, Fenwick said. Despite the amount of With this in mind, Winkel continued from page 5 but they actually sort of recre- Students used the end of engagement, many students has possible improvements for ated a really popular song and I the event to exchange contact wished for the exchange to be potential future events. “One the event exciting and informa- was amazed,” Choo said. information with each other. longer and more personal. “I change would be to extend the tional. “I was surprised because Winkel decided for his band “Afterwards, I even chatted to wish there was a bit more time time or set it up for at least two it looked different from what I students to play the song “Mer students via Instagram, so I feel to talk to the students in some- meetings to give it more time initially expected and I found losse d’r Dom in Kölle” as a like our first meeting was a suc- thing like breakout rooms be- [and] work on the group sizes the names [of locations] pretty way to welcome the AGB stu- cess already,” Kaminski said. cause 55 minutes wasn’t really maybe,” he said. interesting. Specifically, I did dents. “We created a little piece This reflects Winkel’s goals enough to get to know them,” Overall, Winkel felt satisfied not know that they called the that I knew and usually played to engage students in different Lu said. with the event’s success and cafeteria a ‘canteen,’” freshman in a carnival in Germany,” Win- cultures. “The main goal was Winkel was aware of this hinted at a possibility for a simi- Sun Min Choo said in an e-mail kel said. “It was a way to wel- to make the students interest- when planning the event and lar event in the future. “I really interview. come and comfort them.” ed in each other. I remember made accommodations accord- enjoyed it. I really loved it and Not only did students pres- Students felt the cultural that very well when I came to ingly to allocate the timing bet- I’m glad that students became ent videos showcasing everyday exchange event was a positive the United States 20 years ago. ter. “I wanted to make sure that acquainted and were interested life, but they also shared dif- change of pace from regular I found almost everything in- I do not suffocate any student in contacting each other and ferent music pieces. AGB stu- scheduled online classes. “I love teresting, when I went to the conversations [...] I was wor- exchanging e-mails and con- dents played a pop song, while how Dr. Winkel arranged this doctor’s office, the supermar- ried the videos could do that,” tacts. If I were to do it again, of Stuyvesant students presented and took his time to do some- ket—everything was different,” he said. “But, I think everything course, I would,” he said. classical pieces. “It was really thing fun for us [...] I want to Winkel said. “And that is what actually worked out. I gave Chen added, “The cultural disparate from the music we appreciate that, especially since I wanted [students] to become some time in the end when they exchange honestly came out of created. Honestly, I was expect- online school can be very bor- interested in and connect with could communicate with each nowhere but I really liked it,” ing a recording of them just ing,” sophomore Cassandra each other.” other.” she said. The Spectator• April 6, 2021 Page 7 Advertisement
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Pandemic Prompts Regents Examinations Cancelation hanging over our heads. Where- the pandemic,” freshman Chloe lar students need, not what the Environment and Algebra I Re- continued from page 5 as I feel like now that it’s been Tom said in an e-mail interview. state arbitrarily decides is good gents. “Our weekly after school canceled, we can maybe focus With the cancelation, some or right or needs to be learned.” classes have remained the same, and I believe that teachers at a little bit more on quality in- teachers have reflected on pos- In addition to fulfilling with tutors going over practice Stuy strive to make their classes struction rather than just rush- sible improvements for the ex- graduation requirements, Re- problems from previous Re- more meaningful than just Re- ing to get everything done,” ams. “I don’t think the Regents gents exams would tradition- gents exams to reinforce the gents exam preparation,” Smith Talented and Gifted for Young should be gone forever, but I ally be factored into students’ concepts and using other online said. Scholars social studies teacher think it would be a good time final second semester average resources in collaboration with Math teacher Patrick Hon- Emily Lake, who teaches U.S. to re-evaluate how we structure in certain classes at Stuyvesant, the students’ teachers to make ner considered the possibility History, said. the exam and how much infor- such as Geometry. Usually, the each session meaningful and of the exams being canceled Chemistry teacher Kristyn mation we put on the exam,” Regents score accounts for a rewarding for our students,” this spring but believes that Pluchino expressed a similar Lake said. large portion of a student’s final ARISTA President and senior students are prepared to excel sentiment. “I’m really relieved Others, however, are against grade during the second semes- Emma Donnelly said. “Our regardless. “It’s always our goal because usually, you have to the standardized nature of ter, though the weight of said program is designed to encour- to teach beyond Regents-level set aside time to help students these exams and their presence scores is up to the department age learning for the pursuit mastery, and that’s still true this review for the Regents,” she in students’ education. “The and/or teacher. of understanding rather than year even under unusual cir- said. “I feel like this semester, insufficiency of the exam and However, there is still some solely for a number grade on an cumstances. We want students the pace has already been really the inequity of the system were uncertainty as to whether there exam.” to be successful in math this quick, so I’m glad that I don’t incredibly obvious from the will be modifications to make Despite the uncertainty and year, but we also want to make have to carve out a couple of huge range of performance on up for the lack of Regents at mixed emotions, many are op- sure they are prepared to suc- weeks for review. We get to the exam across the city. Not all the end of second semester. “I timistic that the cancelation is ceed next year and beyond,” slow down on the topics, delve schools have the same resourc- can’t speak for other depart- to the students’ benefit. “This Honner said in an e-mail inter- into more challenging topics, es that Stuy does, and there are ments, but this is definitely year, everyone needs to be cut a view. and give students a chance to schools that have even more something that the math de- little bit of slack [...] Hopefully, With the majority of Re- practice and feel like they really than Stuy,” English teacher partment has been discussing this makes June a little easier gents canceled, many middle understand the material.” Lauren Stuzin said. “If schools and will continue to discuss,” for everyone. It has been a long school teachers who teach Re- In addition to teachers, could decenter standardized Smith said. haul since March,” Pluchino gents-level classes feel less pres- many students felt relieved forces like Regents or Ad- For ARISTA’s District 1 said. “Thank you [students] for sure from having to fit the cur- upon hearing about Regents vanced Placement [exams], they Pilot Program in collabora- hanging in and doing all the lit- riculum and test prep into the cancelations. “I’m a little glad could focus more on teaching tion with PS/MS 34 and BELL tle things and being responsible school year. “It felt like we were that we don’t have to take as directly to the students in those Academy, ARISTA tutors will and on top of your work. I’m just rushing through the cur- many just because of how dif- schools and [be] more in accor- continue to prepare eighth looking forward to being back riculum a lot with the Regents ficult learning has been during dance with what those particu- grade students for the Living in the building.”
Dr. Lisa Greenwald Leads the Ellington Project impact of projects and organi- hard, they’ve lost parents, sion news coverage of other fixing, or that you see a situa- continued from page 5 zations and their contribution they’ve lost grandparents, their people doing good things. tion that needs help, how about to fostering a more cohesive parents are out of work,” she No, we should just get off our making a plan yourself. Maybe munity has fostered. “I love sense of community. “They’re said. “When we’re putting all butts and do stuff,” she said. knocking on your neighbors’ feeling like I’m creating [...] a doing their own thing, I’m do- our energy into playing video She advises people to look doors or putting up flyers.” culture on our block that says ing my own thing, there are games and complaining about deeper into their own com- Through the Ellington everyone belongs. It doesn’t also other organizations, we’re how isolated we feel, it’s im- munities and find ways to Project, Dr. Greenwald has matter if you live in a fancy all doing our own thing, but portant for us to add some wa- help. “People around the city found value in helping and apartment, it doesn’t matter if we’re able to come together ter to our wine, to think about ask how to help the Ellington, understanding others. “My you live in a transitional hous- and work on things together. what we are grateful for, and and I said, ‘Don’t. Help your message is really one about ing shelter. If you’re on our And when you do that, when then to help other people with own community. Do your perspective and understanding block, you belong. And that’s you have a whole neighbor- even greater challenges than own thing,’” she said. “Find and being willing. That doesn’t what the West 111th Street hood doing different things, our own.” out if there are any neighbor- mean denying your feelings, Block Association is also do- it’s great,” she said. Dr. Greenwald emphasized hood associations [...] if there that doesn’t mean, I’m fine, ing,” she said. The West 111th She further explained that the importance of assisting are any community-building I’m fine, I’m fine,” she said. Street Block Association was while living during this pan- local communities and creat- organizations. You can speak “That might mean saying, I created in April 2020 as an or- demic has been difficult for ing an initiative to help others. to your local assembly person feel incredibly lonely and dis- ganization for both residents everyone, there are some who “We don’t have to sit around [...] or your local city govern- connected from everybody. I and local businesses of West have been affected more se- and say [...] somebody else will ment representative who often need to step out of myself and 111th Street on the Upper verely and may require more tell me what to do, somebody knows what is going on. The see other people suffering, and West Side. assistance. “There are some else will do something good. I other way to get involved is if help them. And then I’ll feel She also highlighted the students for whom it is very can sit back and watch televi- you see a problem that needs better too.” Dead Art
Christina Jiang / The Spectator Ying Chen / The Spectator The Spectator • April 6, 2021 Page 9 Features What’s In a Rec? Teachers Explain the Process of Writing Recommendation Letters By ISABELLE LAM least two drafts.” at Stuy, I said ‘yes’ to so many times read several drafts from One way to re-distribute the and KAELIANA YU Letter-writing is most likely students (without properly a student, which adds a lot of weight of letter-writing among to “write itself ” when the teach- keeping track), and wound up work to teachers’ plates. Gross- teachers could be to ask not “Passed the class. Very en- er really knows the student. having to write nearly 60 let- man added, “The time it takes just junior teachers, but sopho- gaged. Not violent towards “It is definitely helpful if a ters,” Hanna said. “I will never to write 40 recommendations is more teachers, too. “One big classmates. 10/10 would rec- student has a strong presence in do that again.” Drowning in time that could be spent plan- misapprehension that I think ommend this student for your class through their participation, a recommendation flood is a ning lessons and responding to a lot of students have is that college.” or has frequently sought me problem particularly for teach- student work and helping stu- [letters] must be from a junior Or something to that effect. out for help after class or by e- ers of humanities subjects. As- dents.” teacher. Really, [you should ask] Most Stuyvesant students un- mail,” math teacher Brian Sterr a teacher who knows you well,” derstand the general gist of a wrote in an e-mail interview. Grossman explained. Get- recommendation letter, which Gary Rubinstein, also from the ting a recommendation from is that it should recommend. math department, makes spe- a sophomore year teacher in- What is more of a mystery is cial effort to document his stu- stead of a junior year teacher is how teachers write them, es- dents’ participation. “I’ve been a particularly promising idea in pecially in the remote world–– keeping track of participation the world of remote learning, how do teachers get to know on this app, ClassDojo, which where teachers do not know their students? How many recs elementary school teachers use much more about students than do they write? What qualities in a lot,” he said. “If I [didn’t] the wall behind them on Zoom. their students might they look keep track of [participation] “Normally, when students work for? and mark it, it would all just be in groups in my class, I go Nearly all teachers agree gone in my mind at the end.” around and listen to the con- that a student must do well aca- Beyond documenting the major versations and can get a sense demically in the class in order participants in class, Rubinstein of which students take on lead- to merit a recommendation let- has also made efforts to get to ership roles, who likes to help ter. Social studies teacher David know his students through extra Cindy Yang Spectator / The others, etc,” Sterr said. “With Hanna, for instance, requires a credit videos: “I made some ex- breakout rooms, that isn’t re- minimum average of A- in his tra credit projects where people ally possible, especially when class, as well as high scores on made Flipgrid videos, for ex- 85 percent of the time when I Advanced Placement (AP) and tra credit or just optional stuff. pop into a breakout room, ev- Regents exams to back up what Some people have done that eryone’s muted.” he writes about students. and I know those people bet- Challenging as it is for stu- But as Hanna explains, ter because I watch these little sistant Principal of English Eric The English department has dents and teachers to get to sometimes these numbers are videos that they made. That was Grossman was able to cite some already attempted to dam the know each other, there are still not enough to string together an opportunity I had for people statistics: “Naviance shows that recommendations flood. Eng- some ways to feel more con- a whole letter, and it is for this to [...] introduce [themselves]. some departments write, on lish teacher Megan Weller wrote nected. There are Flipgrids. reason that he gives students a Those things stand out to me.” average, far more than oth- in an e-mail interview, “The There are office hours. There brief questionnaire to add some But no matter how many ers, [and] some teachers write English department, a couple is an unmute button, which you more substance to their recom- active, bright-eyed, Flipgrid- far more than others,” he said. years ago, [...] decided we would can click at any moment (per- mendations. “Sometimes the making students a teacher has Not only do English teachers have a department cap of 25 haps the middle of a lecture?) letter practically writes itself,” in class, there are only so many bear the brunt of letter-writing, [letters].” Over the past five and let out a primal scream. Hanna said. “Other times, it’s a recommendations a human be- but they also help seniors write years, Weller’s average has been Then teachers will really know real chore. Either way, it takes at ing can write. “My second year their college essays, and some- exactly 25. you. Voices Back to School: 7 Months Later By KRISTA PROTEASA thermometer, and the staff wait- forgot these people were all at even have my phone out. 11/10 other tabs running. My priorities ing to check my health screening. home, and I was basically on would recommend.” quickly changed. Instead of just A little over a year ago, the The lack of people crowding the FaceTime with all of them while My second period class, Span- trying to pass the time, I became Stuyvesant routine we all know hallways reminded me of times I being moderated by a teacher’s ish, began with the same conver- one with the class. Instead of let- and love was put on pause. was incredibly late to class, taking presence. sation, only this time I recited my ting information pass through Now, the time for us to slowly the walk of shame up each step None of the staff in the gym lines in Spanish. Who would’ve my ears, I felt like I was absorb- press play has arrived. Just a and waiting to be questioned by were bothered by any of our thought? That day, Assistant ing information better. My brain few months ago, I was frankly a teacher. But surprise! There activities. No one stared at me Principal of Languages Franc- now returned to being the des- too scared and too stressed out was no teacher because I was… while I asked my teacher what- esca McAuliffe popped into our perate empty sponge waiting to to even imagine going back to early? Nice. ever random questions popped Zoom. For some reason, having soak up knowledge I once knew school. I’d forgotten all the joy I walked into the third floor into my head. Since we’re all stu- an AP visit your class via Zoom it to be. Good to have you back, of in-person learning, which I gym and once again greeted the dents, we’re legally obligated to is a lot more intimidating than buddy. now realize I took for granted. staff with the ever-so humble have adults in the room, but they having them sit quietly in the As my last two classes came But my internal suffering had yet criminally underrated “Good had their own business to attend back of your real-life classroom. to a close, my glee was just ramp- gone on long enough. morning!” It was indeed a good to. Don’t fret, no one can hear At the very satisfying hour ing up. I bid all the staff in the Waking up at a relatively early morning. I made my way to the you when the question asked re- of 12:30 p.m., my biological gym and about the second floor hour again was as horrible as it seat labeled A9, right in front quires a qualitative answer, and clock decided it was lunch time. a good night. I made my way was for as many minutes as it of the gym entrance. I felt so you said “16.” My face gets red The next twenty minutes were down to Battery Park (which I took for my brain to process be- blessed. During the next ten and sweaty at times like this too. filled with chicken, broccoli, and know isn’t really Battery Park ing awake, but once that was set- minutes or so, I sat anxiously To be completely honest, this APUSH. Quite a lovely combo, but everyone still calls it Battery tled, I brushed my teeth and put waiting to see who would come was the first day I took legitimate if I do say so myself. Participat- Park). The tiny sculptures adorn- on a complete outfit for school through those very doors. Some notes all year, not just scratch- ing today felt extra necessary, as ing the chess tables were still for the first time since March. friends arrived! Nice! Seeing my ing some formulas and dates on if I had to make up for all the there and the flowing river, along Yes, this did include proper pants friends at school has never been a page and calling it a day. My lost time. I felt so scholarly just with the boats sailing through it, and shoes, something many of more exhilarating. We exchanged note-taking skills definitely need perusing around in an education- remained unchanged. The small us haven’t experienced in a while. a couple words of acknowledge- some fine tuning but it was nice al setting. children still mosied across the I practically bounded down the ment and pretty much went to finally be an active member of Every trip to the bathroom lawn as well. After a few minutes stairs of the subway, feeling the about our days, characteristic of a classroom again. In my efforts was a walk down memory lane. of zen, I made my way to the adrenaline rush of barely catch- a normal return to school. to copy down every diagram, I The rows of lockers lining the subway for my journey home. ing the train before its doors As people slowly trickled actually felt myself learning ac- third floor brought me back to Nothing’s seemed to have closed, then it proceeded to ac- into the gym, my social battery tual material again, which was a sophomore year, when I’d see all changed, yet I know everything celerate down the tracks. immediately recharged. The rus- wonderful feeling. The same re- my junior friends sipping their has changed. Going to school in- A comforting sight: adults tling of papers and the clacking al-life class sentiment remained iced coffees and slowly closing person is one of the best deci- wearing suits looking barely of keys livened the previously when my teachers sent the class their doors to proceed to class. sions I’ve made this school year. sentient as they pulled up their desolate gym. Since Windows into breakout rooms and the first Ah, the good ol’ days. As much as we used to blame masks in between coffee sips, didn’t want to connect to the sentence anyone said was, “So Freshly stocked soap and pa- school for everything, from cold metal poles breaking up WiFi, I simply connected to my what are we doing?” Class got per towel dispensers greeted my taking our beloved sleep away the blue benches, and the ran- hotspot. No biggie. First period ten times more exciting when I entrance to the restroom, and I to forcing us to walk up what dom yet calculated spotted pat- physics had a whole new ward- was put into a breakout room can’t say I didn’t miss this part of seemed like tens upon hundreds tern donning the floor. It’s been robe today. Instead of the ripped with all my friends who were at the school, too. of flights of stairs, it’s the one so long since I last race-walked shirt and socks in desperate home. In short, all my classes pro- constant in our current lives. The down Chambers Street with fire need of a wash, class felt more “Where are you, Krista?” one ceeded as they always had when building that housed so many of fueling the soles of my feet while like Meryl Streep in “The Devil of my classmates asked in one of I was at home. I still participated our highs and lows is still there, trying to avoid being late. Wears Prada”: so put together, so the breakout rooms. just as much (if not more) and unchanged, only now it’s an op- I greeted every security guard confident, so intriguing. Answer- “The gym!” my teachers still taught the les- portunity for you to take your with some variation of “good ing questions was a bit awkward “How many people are son of the day. The only dif- thumb off the pause button that morning!” because boy, have I at first, but I soon realized that there?” ference was that I now felt too was the previous season of your missed people. After complet- no one in the gym (at least to “Um… I can’t estimate but embarrassed not to pay atten- life. Start a new episode, and see ing the most physically intense my knowledge) minded me and maybe around 15? 20?” tion as I was in an actual school. what plot you’ll get to experi- act so far of getting the second my enthusiasm for the entire “Oh, cool. What’s it like?” I couldn’t bear the thought of ence. You’re the main character floor double doors open, I was day, even in my breakout rooms “It’s a fun time; I got my little my computer freezing on me here, and it’s your choice wheth- met with the ID scanner, the where I practically burst out desk all set up with my note- because I tried to play cool- er or not you want to let another newly-implemented touch-free laughing at times. I completely books, my computer, and I can mathgames.com while having 13 season pass you by. Page 10 The Spectator • April 6, 2021 Features Students’ Response to Anti-Asian Hate Crimes By THE EDITORIAL BOARD and THE FEATURES DEPARTMENT
In light of the shooting in Atlanta, Georgia and the increase in Anti-Asian hate crimes since the start of the COVID-19 pandemic, we interviewed students and sent out a form to the student body on their thoughts and responses. Here is what they said: *Certain responses have been edited for length and clarity.
“Seeing the rise in anti-Asian hate is frightening, “As an Asian American woman, I feel that the Atlanta shooting “It’s hard to hear about this negative media but unfortunately it’s not surprising. Violence has definitely hits us differently. Those women look like me. They look because it’s a very sensitive topic. What’s frustrating become a norm in the United States. Along with like my mother, my aunts, [and] my grandmother. It just hurts know- is that if it was a minority who committed these the Atlanta shootings, many elderly Asians are being ing that one day, that could be me or someone I love. What angers me crimes they would be labeled as terrorists. Mean- assaulted. I have grandparents at home and it scares even further was that the police just dismissed it as him having a ‘bad while, the person who committed this crime is not.” me if anything were to happen to them.” day.’ No, it was a hate crime by a white terrorist. He wanted to elimi- —Rafatune Myma, Sophomore —Iris Lin, Freshman nate his ‘sexual temptations,’ when in reality he just had yellow fever. He had racist fantasies of dominating Asian women and chose to act on them. The fetishization of Asian women and most POC women in “It’s really upsetting to see everything that’s been happening. I’ve had countless peers talk to me about how general, has long been an issue that has yet to be properly addressed. afraid they are to go outside, and it’s scary to think that it could easily be one of us, or our family members, that When will people understand that my race is not just another porn get assaulted next. It’s been really frustrating to see our current socio-political situation pit minorities against category to fulfill your derogatory sexual desires?” each other rather than empower us to stand up forone another and against the bigger issue: white supremacy.” —Ashley Tian, Junior —Anonymous, Junior
“I feel very frustrated because many people “About the Atlanta shooting: the fact that the spokesperson had the audacity to say it was just a “bad day” for the culprit and are still ignoring the rise in hate crimes and/or the fact that the shooter blamed it on his sex addiction––it’s so hilarious. These people you murdered shouldn’t have and will telling me that there is no racism in America. never deserve to be victims of something you control. Your “sex addiction” doesn’t justify your actions or the reasons for your I had someone tell me that I was making a big actions. Most of the people who are attacking Asian Americans, Asians, Pacific Islanders, are racist and uneducated. They think deal out of nothing when I told him about the that they are right to attack innocent people and their justification is simply because “they’re Asian.” It doesn’t matter what race, Atlanta shooting and that the attack wasn’t racially gender, sexuality, etc. you are, no one should have to experience a hate crime or an unjustified and illogical attack because of motivated. I’m so tired of people making excuses something they can’t control. for white terrorists, and I feel like, in the eyes of COVID-19 began in Wuhan, China. At the time, the Asians and Asian Americans in the United States weren’t even in Chi- the government system and the general public, na. We couldn’t have caused it. Additionally, China as a whole should not be accused of the sole cause of the pandemic. For it to hate crimes don’t matter as long as a white person spread, it had to be because one person ate the food and got sick but gave it to others unknowingly. This being said, one person’s commits them. If a POC shot a white person accidental action shouldn’t define all Asians all over the world. People didn’t catch COVID because it was spread by Asians. They and killed them, they’d get life in prison, so why caught COVID because people didn’t listen to the scientists, doctors, and medical experts. They didn’t take precautions as they is it that when a white person shoots and kills should’ve. And they have the audacity to blame us, as if they were never wrong. It is absolutely hilarious that the people who at- eight people (six of them Asian), he is portrayed tack us Asians for these stupid reasons are the same people who think they don’t need to wear masks and attacks Asians who are as someone who “just had a bad day?” I really trying to protect themselves from getting COVID. And then you get COVID and now it’s their fault? The people you killed, the hope that Stuyvesant shows a strong front against innocent women and men who were just doing their job, trying to provide for their family—some of these people are mothers, racism and that the city actually cracks down on fathers, and grandmothers. These innocent people did not and never will deserve to have everything taken away from them for hate crimes (starting by identifying hate crimes as an unjustified and illogical reason. As for the murderers, the racially stupid and heartless people, there is blood tainted on your actual hate crimes and not just random shootings) skin, blood tainted in your soul, all as a result of the evil deeds you committed. This is what white supremacy has become. This so I can feel safe and accepted. As of now, I can’t is what the world has become. To combat this, people must be unified and fight back together. No innocent person deserves or even take a walk without being called a chink. It will never deserve the fate that the victims of the Asian hate crimes received.” really is ridiculous.” —Anonymous, Freshman —Rachel Lin, Junior
“I’m pretty surprised about the shootings and rise in Asian hate crime. And it has “There have been various differing opinions from the media, from my family, friends, affected my community because now I get to talk about it with my friends. Before, we and peers about the motivations behind the Atlanta shootings and responsible parties for never really talked about world issues, but now we always share news with each other increased anti-Asian hate crimes. Differing political narratives or attempts to rationalize and keep each other up to date. And my family and I also watch the news just to see recent events from any political party don’t matter so much as the effect. From my experi- what’s going on in the world.” ence, family members and friends have expressed that they simply feel unsafe and feel that —Shafiul Haque, Sophomore no political party truly represents them and their needs without conflicts of interest. Many parents are worried about how they will send their kids back to school when reopenings “I’m definitely more scared and cautious to go outside, though it won’t stop me from occur. Many do not feel safe enough to gather with friends, go outside, use public trans- going out. I have a bit of anger, and just this idea of why: we literally did nothing wrong. port, and be themselves.” The entire thing is stupid, but I do like how there is a lot of activism about it and lots of —Michelle Zhang, Junior people are speaking out. People are being less quiet and it’s very nice to see support.” —Pak Lau, Senior
“This has made me realize how much Stuy and really the whole culture around discussing race has failed people of color “It’s incredibly disgusting to me to see the increasing rise of hate crimes against Asian-Americans in this (POC) like myself. It takes a mass shooting to even start talking nation. It’s indicative of the harmful effects rhetoric can have on minority groups. Names such as “Kung Flu” about racial tensions. And when my (primarily white) teachers or “the Chinese virus” have been used by notable political figures, including our former president, to describe do talk about it, they murmur sympathetically, show dainty Pow- COVID-19. This irresponsible and downright racist way of phrasing the virus has made people point to Chinese erPoint presentations, reblog articles and say ‘This is so horrible.’ people as a scapegoat to take out their anger on. Trying to frame COVID-19 in a way that points to Chinese Do they ever feel like a parasite or a virus when they walk down people as the cause of it emboldens bigots to carry out violence against them. It is one of the reasons the World streets? Do they feel the need to, like so many POC individuals, Health Organization itself said that no ethnic or racial groups should be mentioned when naming an infectious cover up with beanies and masks and cover up as much skin as virus, as it leads to indiscriminate violence against these groups as we are seeing now. possible to pass as white under fabric? I don’t think so. They don’t What also isn’t helping is the handling of this spike in hate crimes by the authorities. Many cases of racially really know how it feels like, past articles and delicate conversa- motivated attacks have yet to lead to arrests, and when they do lead to arrests, in some cases including in the re- tions through Zoom and sympathetic Google Classroom posts. cent case of the stabbing of a Chinese man in Chinatown, the perpetrator arrested was not convicted of a crime. They—and other non-POC individuals—are supposed to care However, the most egregious of all is what happened with the Atlanta shooting. A white man, fueled by bigotry about brutal inequalities. But they aren’t ever, ever supposed to against Asian people, and specifically Asian women, killed eight people because he viewed Asian women as sex fall victim to it.” objects that were fueling his “sex addiction,” instead of human beings with emotions and livelihoods. The obvious —Anonymous, Sophomore police response would be to call out the actions of this bigot. However, what we got instead was a police officer saying the shooter was “fed up,” “at the end of his rope,” and “was having a bad day.” It is sickening to see the “I feel disgusted by these hate crimes. I feel disappointed that justification this shooter is getting for their actions. When there are cases of extremism carried out by people of many people find it so hard to treat people like people. I hope color, they are vilified by the media and are used to justify hatred against their groups. However, when it’s a white that instead of focusing so much on the perpetrator’s motive or person doing it, suddenly it is this nuanced discussion on mental health. There is no discussion to have here. This life, we focus on those who have lost their lives. Let’s focus on man is a bigot, and if not a bigot, a horrible piece of garbage who killed eight people. Seeing cops try to justify the victims, learn about who they are, learn about their lives and the acts of a racist simply emboldens other shooters to carry out the same actions. It’s simply disgusting, and I their families, and support them in any way. Don’t give that mur- feel like if we want to see anything change regarding the current situation right now, we need our politicians and derer more attention, and please respect everyone because there is police officers to listen to the voices of Asian Americans and realize how some of what they’re saying is downright no way you know everything they are going through and feeling, problematic and harmful.” and you cannot assume that based on race or other traits.” —Luca Adeishvili, Sophomore —Anonymous, Freshman The Spectator • April 6, 2021 Page 11 Features Students’ Response to Anti-Asian Hate Crimes By THE EDITORIAL BOARD and THE FEATURES DEPARTMENT
“I remember when I was younger, people would say all these stereotypical jokes: “I will say that Asian hate does have a significant impact on us. I’ve talked to my friends ‘you eat dogs, since you’re Chinese.’ And I would say, ‘No, I’m not Chinese.’ That about this and they’re very bothered about it and I am too, because while I haven’t personally would be my go to response, and I feel like that is for a lot of Asians. But we fail to experienced a lot of it, the fear that it could happen is so much more in my face. This is realize that they don’t care. If we’re all Asian, then they’re just going to keep saying actually something that is really a problem; it’s so much more prevalent now [...] The way the same jokes, the overused stereotypes, and even violence as we see now. So what that the coronavirus was talked about by the people in power definitely had an influence on we need to do as a collective community is to stand up as one solid movement of other people and the way that many communities perceived Asians. As a whole, it’s just how Asians, together, to fight against racial injustice, instead of bickering amongst each it’s been for a while; it just hasn’t been as recognized. And [given] how a lot of people say other [and] amongst ourselves. That’s the main goal of what we should do, [as well Asians are the model minority, people don’t really care in the end because it’s just not seen as making] our voices heard. It’s what we’ve been avoiding for the past years. Going as a real problem. While the recent incidents and the rise [in anti-Asian hate] has been very back to before, when I was a kid, you would try to fit in with all these dumb jokes, problematic, I do think that it’s important because it’s brought so much more awareness to think they’re funny, and go along with them. But I realize that’s not a good thing to the whole situation, and people have started to care so much more about it.” do. That just feeds into these racist jokes, [which] help feed into even more violence.” —Julia Lee, sophomore —Jinseo Hong, sophomore
“The Atlanta Spa shooting is horrifying and what is perhaps scarier is that the act of sheer terrorism is not even confirmed as a hate crime. The rise in Asian American hate crimes is truly horrifying and unjust. Even in the most diverse city in the world, New York, there are still Asian American hate crimes. Many of my East Asian friends are afraid of going out now and overall my community has become more tense and afraid as I live in an almost entirely Asian community. I truly hope Asian American hate crimes end in the near future, as it is not right for Asian Americans to be treated inhumanely.” —Rayyan Bhuiyan, junior
Stuy’s TikTok Stars By ISABELLA JIA, lowers.” TikTok was rewarding, as they Sometimes they’re like random p.m. And lastly, at night around LAUREN LEE For others who are looking received support for coming hate comments that are like 8:30 p.m.” and AVA FUNG to grow their TikTok following, out, which encouraged them to ‘haha, Baldy,’ and then there’s Han also attributes his Wong has some advice. “Post continue posting. “I was met sometimes ‘kill all the fill-in-a- growth to the lack of math ac- Boredom. It’s horrible to often. The TikTok algorithm with a lot of support, which homophobic-slur-here.’” counts on TikTok. Thinking live through, but it’s great for seems to favor accounts that was really nice, because I was There’s a different side outside the box and filming creativity. Stuyvesant students post often and will put their fresh out in the closet. And I to TikTok creators, though. math content has helped Han have experienced boredom be- videos on the For You page really liked appealing to the gay Junior Paige Wolfing mainly stand out and gain attention. yond bounds during this pan- more,” she said. “I would also community. So I make a lot of uses her account, not to grow “Math isn’t really a loved sub- demic, but TikTok has risen as suggest that you post content LGBTQ+ based TikToks. A to a wider connection, but ject, in terms of what people an outlet to express pent up that is relatable, so that people lot of humor-based content rather a deeper connection watch on TikTok, but that’s creativity. The expansive social will share it with their friends as well. No thirst traps ever,” with friends. After she was why I did it. At the time I start- media app has a specific algo- convinced to try out a trend, ed TikTok, math wasn’t really rithm that tailors to viewers’ Wolfing slowly started creat- that popular. Because if you preferences, but some students ing more and more videos. “I think of TikTok you think of have gone above and beyond post a lot of different things, like dancing videos or just like the viewer status to become but mostly basic transition comedy. Math kind of stands content creators, amassing videos, outfit videos, and just out in that realm,” Han said. thousands—and sometimes any of the trends that are go- Junior Christopher Dou, millions—of likes. These stu- ing around at the time. For me, another math TikToker, start- dents have built their following usually when I post about Mar- ed his TikTok, @themathwiz- through well-thought-out con- vel or Minecraft, that makes ard, in mid-October of last tent and fresh editing and have the algorithm,” Wolfing wrote year and has amassed 1.2 mil- gone on record to spill their in an e-mail interview. Her lion followers and 14.7 million secrets and stories. followers consist mostly of likes. He posts TikToks with Junior Emma Wong has friends or mutuals, but a few the goal of teaching math to many TikTok accounts, but of her TikToks have become a mainstream audience, as well her most popular account has viral, with her total likes com- as spreading his love of math. amassed 20.4K followers and ing in at 131.6k. “What inspired me to post was
540.3K likes. Wong typically Spectator Christina Jiang / The Wolfing has met a lot of a while back I was doing tutor- posts relatable and funny con- great people from all over the ing and there were a lot of kids tent as well as TikToks that world that she has built a con- who kind of wanted math tu- use popular sounds and follow nection with through the app. toring but they couldn’t,” Dou trends. Wong’s first viral Tik- She was even able to reconnect said. “I just feel like there are Tok was unexpected. “It was with an old friend of hers. “I so many people I could teach funny when my account first remember this one person rec- at one time and a lot of these blew up because I posted it ognized me after being on her people didn’t find math inter- without the intention of it go- For You page, and I haven’t esting.” ing viral, since I only had about and leave comments. Creativity they said. Over time, Friedman seen her since a summer camp Dou has some advice up his 100 followers,” Wong wrote in is definitely useful, especially if switched up their content style we were in together in like sleeves to becoming TikTok an e-mail interview. “My Tik- you’re putting a twist on popu- when they came out as non- fourth grade. It was cool that famous. “Follow the trends Tok notifications and [follow- lar trends or sounds.” binary. TikTok could bring us togeth- and use the features that Tik- er] count just started going up Sophomore Ruby Fried- This wasn’t the only switch er again, even after that long Tok puts out, like stitches and really quickly and it caught me man also creates comedic and for Friedman’s TikTok con- period of time,” Wolfing said. duets, as TikTok often heavily by surprise.” relatable content. Most of tent, as they began to be While scrolling through promotes them, and make sure Wong enjoys the benefits their videos are geared towards known for fake piercing tutori- the For You page, you might that you get their attention in of her newfound TikTok re- the LGBTQ+ community and als. Friedman made a fake nose even stumble upon math Tik- the first two seconds to make nown, including new internet document their journey com- ring tutorial in mid-September Toks sandwiched between them not want to leave,” Dou friends and more followers ing out. Since last August, and got half a million views dancing and comedy videos, said. Additionally, he advises on her other social media ac- Friedman has racked up 19K and almost 200,000 likes. From featuring SAT math tips or making videos that catch the counts. “It’s pretty cool to have followers and over 500K likes that TikTok alone, Friedman tricks. Junior Cary Han is one audience’s attention right away. a following on TikTok, and on their account @rubyfriii. amassed 6,000 followers. Af- of the pioneers of these math His last piece of advice was people are usually impressed At first, Friedman felt ani- ter receiving their first taste of accounts with 2.3 million fol- much less technical. “Just try by it. Because of TikTok I’ve mosity toward the app and TikTok notability, they contin- lowers and 20.3 million likes to be yourself. Don’t be some- made good friends that live in only watched TikToks through ued along this path and filmed on his account, @my.bummy. one you’re not; they can tell if all parts of the country, and my Instagram Reels. “I had origi- more piercing tutorials, includ- math.tutor. you’re being real or fake,” he Instagram account gained over nally encountered TikToks ing a septum ring one and ear- He started in the June of said. 2,000 more followers too,” she through Instagram, because I ring one. However, they even- 2020 in the midst of boredom All of these TikTokers have explained. However, Wong was kind of an anti-TikToker, tually lost interest and switched during quarantine. “Basically, I one thing in common. They all notices a difference between like I despised TikTok,” they back to LGBTQ+ content. was really bored. So I had noth- jumped right in, and that’s ex- the TikTok algorithm and said. However, they started TikTok following doesn’t ing to post and I posted videos actly what Dou recommends. other platforms. “Although I to embrace it as they watched come without consequences, related to math,” Han said. “For people who want to start have over 20K followers, my more LGBTQ+ TikToks. “At however. Friedman has also Regarding his massive account TikTok, just go for it; don’t be TikToks don’t get nearly that the time, around March quar- faced haters and death threats. growth, he attributes it to his scared what’s the worst that’s many views or likes because antine, I was heavily closeted, “The worst thing is when you constant posting. “As long as gonna happen,” Dou advised. of how the algorithm works,” and I was watching all these encounter the weirdos; the you post consistently, and your Soon, you might find your- she said. “I’ve noticed that this gay TikToks. And I was like, weirdos are the people who quality is somewhat the same, self hooked on making videos is the case for most people on ‘Hey, that’s really cool. I could recently put me on a shaved I guess your account just con- about things of your interest, TikTok, where they could ac- try that.’ I came out in April, head fetish page [...] It was very tinues to grow,” he explained. whether it be math, art, or Mar- cumulate a decent following and then I was like, ‘I think I’m bad,” Friedman said. “I’ve also “I normally post around three vel comics. And who knows… but their content doesn’t con- going to start,’” Friedman said. not enjoyed the death threats. times a day. I post at 11 a.m. maybe somebody else will be sistently get shown to their fol- Friedman’s exploration into Those aren’t fun. I get those. And then I post around 2:30 interested too. Page 12 The Spectator • April 6, 2021 Features Voices Eine Brot-und-Butter Quarantäne By ZOE BUFF same one dish for everyone— forget them. 12th grade in order to prepare always a warm dish, but dinner the caregiver will have to as- The caregivers—there’s a for university education. It is only bread. Bread. Butter. Day 1: semble a tray for me according different one every day of the only took me one weekend to Cheese. Ham. Every. Single. Sunday, Feb 28th to what I want to eat. Except week—are very nice, and they decide I wanted to stay in Ger- Night. I used to like bread, but usually the only option for try their best to look out for many. On Friday we were tour- I don’t think I do anymore. There’s a pounding in my dinner is bread, so I don’t have me. When they bring me food, ing the school, and by Tuesday ears, and I can barely register much of a choice to make. I stand behind the threshold I was moving in. Even though Day 5: what the dormitory caregiver They leave the tray on a table with my mask on so we can the decision cost me an extra Thursday, March 4th is saying. Did I sleep enough outside. I take it, and when I’m talk a little bit. They always ask year of high school, I could on the flight? Definitely not. I done I leave it out again for me if it’s boring for me, staying not be happier with where I Since yesterday was a good landed in Germany at 4 a.m. them to take away. in the apartment all by myself. am now, after spending three day, I’m in a pretty good mood EST, but in Munich, it’s al- I put on some comfort- My answer is yes, but I say no. months in a classroom instead today. I’m scheduled to take ready mid-morning. The nice able clothes and seat myself Whenever I receive my of a computer at home. a COVID test tomorrow, at a lady tells me to expect lunch at the white table with my lap- food tray or place it outside doctor’s office that’s a 10-min- at one o’clock. I stand in the top, keeping it connected to my door, I catch a glimpse of Day 4: ute walk away from campus. It’s doorway of the apartment un- an outlet. Video calls have a the world outside my apart- Wednesday, March 3rd a rapid test, which means the til she waves goodbye. For five tendency to rapidly run down ment. The hallways of the result will come within half an days I am not to step over the my battery. I take a variety of Internat—the German word I wake up this morning and hour after I take it. If it’s nega- threshold. I shut the door. My courses, all of which are re- for boarding school—feel ee- reflect on what an unproduc- tive, I’ll be free to move back quarantine begins. quired: economics, ethics, ge- rie and ghostlike. When the tive day Tuesday was. I had to my room! I’ve never looked Most Germans don’t use ography, and even physics—a school shut down in mid-De- so much planned, but I ended forward to going outside so wallpaper. The apartment is class that most of my class- cember last year, the dorms up doing less than half of it. much. Luckily, the quarantine decorated with white plaster, mates have been taking for at followed suit, sending all the I promise myself that today was only five days, because I’m except for the kitchen and the least three years already. boarding kids home and me will be different. Once school not sure if I would’ve been bathroom. I was expecting a able to handle two room the size of my dorm, weeks. which is about 70 square My classes end feet. I got something more shortly before one than twice as big. o’clock today. Three
There’s a quaint little Couresty of Zoe Buff solid doubles. Social area for watching TV with studies, chemistry, a black couch, a dining table French. In terms with two chairs—funny, of subject matter, ‘cause who am I going to school was pretty share it with?—a bedroom light today, but sit- with two beds, a tiny closet ting in front of a attached to it, a small bath- computer screen for room with a colorful shower six hours straight curtain, and a kitchen about is enough to knock the same size. All three win- Zoe Buff Couresty of the wind out of any- dows are large and square, one’s sail. framed by beautiful red cur- After class ends, tains. I’m still in a really At first, I didn’t know good mood. I turn what to do. I’d never gone on some music and five days without being in the By the time my last class fin- back to New York. Not until is over, I intend to get things do a little workout. The sky same space as a human be- ishes, my legs feel like jelly, and a week prior to my arrival back done. My head feels clear for was white all morning, but in fore. Luckily, remote learning my mind feels like lead. In the in Germany in late February the first time since I entered the early afternoon the sun will keep me busy, but there few minutes I have between did the boarding school open quarantine. came streaming through the are still so many hours left this class meetings, I run around its doors again, and only 12th By the end of the day, I’m windows, lighting up the entire Sunday. For now, though, ev- the tiny apartment, hoping it graders and international stu- pretty satisfied. With plenty of living room. For the first time eryone I know is sleeping in will compensate for my lack dents were allowed to return. tasks behind me, I have time since I came into quarantine, the city that never sleeps. of exercise. In the fall, during The courses are still online, but to think. I find myself remem- I smile like I mean it. I think the three months of complete within two weeks the school is bering what life was like a year I’m probably just happy that Day 2: in-person school in Munich, I planning on switching to hy- ago, before the coronavirus hit, tonight will be the last night Monday, March 1st went out for walks every single brid learning. and I think about how much of plain old bread. Tomorrow day and sometimes even went I remember the days be- I’ve changed. I don’t think pre- night I’m planning on buying I wake up around seven to jogging in the park. I miss that fore I started at the boarding lockdown me would’ve ever myself a small dinner some- my alarm. I’ve always been re- freedom as I sit by myself, sur- school, the days I pondered willingly quarantined solo in a where. ally good at adjusting to jet lag rounded by white plaster walls. and pondered, wondering if I foreign country in the middle These five days in quaran- with six-hour time differences. should move to Germany for of a pandemic. tine definitely went by faster It takes me a few moments to Day 3: a year. The option of attend- Bread for dinner, the than I thought they would. remember that I am in Ger- Tuesday, March 2nd ing boarding school was first fourth night in a row. I don’t Every time I have a completely many. By myself. With no one brought up by my mother, in mean to complain, and, yes, I new experience, I ask my- to turn to if I need help. The middle day. I think August. We’d gotten wind of am fully aware that bread is a self if I’ve learned anything. I I get to speak with my I’m starting to feel the effects the word that Stuyvesant was staple of German culture— guess this time I learned what parents over FaceTime for of true isolation. I have been most likely going to offer only our breadbox in New York is it was like to completely have 10 minutes before they go to unbelievably lazy these past remote classes, even in a hybrid constantly stocked because my my own space. I’m not used to sleep. Our call is cut short by two days. My head is heavy learning setup. If I chose to go dad can’t live without it—but surfing solo. It wasn’t too bad, the caregiver, who asks what I whenever I close my eyes. I’ve to boarding school, I would be this is simply too much bread though. I think I had fun rid- want for breakfast. For every lost all sense of time. I make attending a Gymnasium, the for me. For breakfast, there are ing the current. meal I have in quarantine— elaborate plans of what I want German term for a school that usually other options, such as except lunch, which is just the to do and then I completely students attend from 5th to cereal and yogurt, and lunch is
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Send your stories to [email protected], or email us with any questions or concerns you have. If you wish, it may be published anonymously. The Spectator • April 6, 2021 Page 13 Features I Stuy With My Little Eye By VINCENT TAN is somehow adept at procrasti- For senior Russell Low, these digital presentations look per- nating assignments until the traits are factors he associates fect while adding more and Scientists say scent and last minute and still managing with Stuyvesant students. “Af- more images or designs with memory are closely linked— to finish and do well,” Zhang terschool vibes brought out diminishing returns,” he added. Adrianna Peng Spectator / The in fact, among the five senses, added. the most nostalgia for me,” Tung’s archetype of the smell is the most closely inter- For senior Carina Lee, this Low recalled. He thought back excessively diligent Stuyves- twined with memory. With that knack for academia is deeply to the smell of food and the ant student is prevalent among in mind, what scent comes to tied to the Stuyvesant culture. smiles of friends, contributing students in other schools. To mind when we think of school? “Stuy kids are really hard work- the laughter and funny conver- Staten Island Technical High What sensations do we associ- ing but in a way that is really sations that often brightened School senior Sharon Zohi- ate with Stuyvesant? Perhaps not obvious. You might think up his days in school. rova, who rarely interacts with it’s the fragrance of the school someone has a lot of free Additionally, Low shares Stuyvesant students, Stuyves- cafeteria. Maybe it’s the odor time and hangs [out] with their Zhang’s views in applauding ant still maintains a reputation of chlorine from the first floor friends a lot, but they study students’ abilities to function for its workload. “The overall Clara Shapiro’s pool. Or maybe it’s the scent of for tests instead of sleeping under stress. “If our school stereotype of Stuy kids tends your deli roll, being made right right after hanging out,” she had an aesthetic, it [would defi- to be the overworked nerdy Advice Column before you go to school. remarked. nitely be] thriving through cha- students,” she commented, For Albert Zhang (‘19), This proficiency for edu- os,” Low said. Nonetheless, he admiring Stuyvesant students’ Querida Clara, these are the steps he retraces cation was also witnessed by also recognizes its more nega- work ethics but also remark- “How do you deal with teachers when thinking of Stuyvesant. Andy Zhou (‘18). While rec- tive traits. “We are all obviously ing on a darker underbelly. Just that just DON’T seem to like you?” As a member of the class of ognizing students’ strengths smart and driven, but I think like Tung, Zohirova noted the —Anonymous, Sophomore 2019, it’s been two years since in school, Andy Zhou recalls our worst shared quality is our school culture’s detrimental he attended Stuyvesant. How- the competitive nature of his low prioritization of mental emphasis on grades. Although Those who seek to curry ever, that time doesn’t stop classmates. “Everyone humble health,” he added. students busy themselves with favor with teachers have many him from visiting and show- bragged and was constantly Many other students share academia, such perseverance options. “Go to office hours,” ing his friends his alma mater. trying to impress each other,” this sentiment, citing how has taken a toll on the student some people advise. “Be respect- “Whenever I swing by Tribeca he said. On a more lightheart- Stuyvesant bears a reputation body. ful! Show interest!” These peo- and Stuy, I always point out ed note, though, Stuyvesant for constant fatigue. “The epit- Though Stuyvesant’s unre- ple are wrong. [Stuyvesant] to my friends,” also reminded Andy Zhou of ome of the Stuy student would lenting workload has its down- What teachers really seek is Zhang said. He added that something more homely: “If be someone barely dragging sides, Proteasa finds solace in someone hardcore. They seek a his friends had only seen the you asked anyone what you their feet to first period holding the camaraderie formed be- student who is willing to go to building in video games like should get for lunch, it would a half-drunk iced coffee,” ju- tween students while overcom- the next level. I, for instance, “Marvel’s Spider Man” (2019), be a bacon guacamole chipotle nior Krista Proteasa remarked, ing these challenges together. demonstrate engagement by get- in which fans can explore the from Ferry’s.” describing how students would “I get nostalgic whenever I re- ting supersized tattoos of my streets of Manhattan as the The Ferry’s that Andy Zhou then participate in long hours count my late night video call teachers’ faces emblazoned onto titular superhero. “I show [my refers to is Battery Park City of activities, fall asleep on the study sessions with my friends my biceps. I then surprise-reveal friends] how the game is miss- Gourmet Market, a grocery subway home, fall asleep strug- that usually never resulted in these tattoos at unexpected mo- ing the bridge that leads from store across from Stuyves- gling to do homework, and stellar scores on whatever test ments during class (if you look the sidewalk directly into the ant. “I like explaining Ferry’s then continue this cycle. “[We the next day,” Proteasa recalled. at the above art, you will see that building and how a river of to people because it’s such an are] a truly remarkable species, “Those, along with team bond- it is a depiction of me doing ex- students would emerge every important part of the Stuy ex- all in all. I wouldn’t want it any ing dinners with my beloved actly this). morning and afternoon from perience, but the deli isn’t even other way,” Proteasa joked. fencing team members will Some people are not ready the bridge,” he recalled. called Ferry’s,” alum Alan Zhou Although Proteasa de- always take me back to the for tattoos. That is okay. Basic For Zhang, the building (‘18) said. As alums, Andy scribed Stuyvesant life with simpler times of when I was a human decency tends to go over manifests intense nostalgia. Zhou and Alan Zhou are all nostalgia, many onlookers view freshman.” just as well with teachers, and I When thinking back to his too familiar with Ferry’s signifi- this cycle as daunting. “Since Through memories of late have never known anybody to time as a student, he remem- cance, as well as the friendly yet [Stuyvesant students] go to night study sessions or long object to an extra ‘hello’ every bers the diversity of talents longstanding divisions between school in the city and get a hours spent on extracurricular now and then. Teachers are hu- within the student body, ap- Ferry’s and another deli next to workload that is difficult, they activities, the dual nature of mans, albeit with formal prefixes plauding the range of activities Stuyvesant, Terry’s. With Bat- always seem like they have no Stuyvesant pushes many stu- in front of their names, so your students undertook. “At Stuy, tery Park City Gourmet Mar- time to spare and need to do dents together, unifying them usual tactics of seduction ought there are so many people who ket adopting its nickname as a things quickly—just like a true in their academic struggles and to go over just as well with them do so many different things, portmanteau of “Fake Terry’s,” New Yorker,” Jeffrey Tung, a creating countless friendships as with any other people. Every- it’s hard to explain—let alone it, along with Terry’s, would senior at Brooklyn Technical and memories. Whether it’s the body seeks to be understood, come up with—a stereotype engrave itself into Stuyvesant High School said. Tung also smell of halal carts or the sight and indeed, as the word implies, of a Stuy student,” he stated. culture. noted an elevated sense of aca- of a Ferry’s roll, students and you must look UNDER the Nonetheless, he still sees a uni- Ferry’s has long stood as a demic excellence its students alumni will always be brought outer layer of a person to truly fying characteristic within their place of comfort for students seem to strive for. “They’ll usu- back to their time in Stuyves- understand them and be under- work. “The typical Stuy student in a work-heavy environment. ally meticulously make their ant. stood. Embracing Asian Identity By ZIFEI ZHAO, acter in my name, Jian, means background every time some- less-minority sounding name. fect on a lot of Asian Ameri- LAUREN LEE and to build. The last character is one says her name. “I am often My culture is really part of my cans who have had their names DALIA LEVANON Ye, which means success.” His awed by the elegance that can identity, but my parents want called out wrongly and changed name is a symbol of the suc- be found in Japanese, where a successful life for me,” Fang by others. With the recent The first word someone cess his parents hope he will a complex, abstract concept explained. Many people in the spike in hate crimes against hears in the morning as their aspire to. “They want me to could be represented with one Asian American community Asian Americans, more and parent wakes them up. The have a successful life,” Fang symbol,” Igarashi explained. have felt pushed to either as- more students have begun to eager call of a friend after re- said. “My parents chose for Through her name, Igarashi is similate into American culture proudly wear their name and uniting after summer break. me to have a name that means able to connect with and take or get stigmatized for being too culture. “I’ve realized how it is Taking attendance in a class- ‘build success.’” Fang’s name pride in her Japanese heritage. foreign. Fang goes by his an- especially during times when room at the beginning of the affects him very deeply in his Freshman Henry Ji also glicized name due to pressure confusion, ignorance, and fear school day. All of these events day-to-day life: “I like my [Chi- shares a similar sentiment. Ji’s from his teacher who made have rotted into potent dis- have something in common— nese] name—I like the meaning Chinese name, Ji Minyu, means little effort to try to pronounce crimination and malice that we a name. Names are more than behind it. It kind of motivates to remember Yu the Great, an his birth name, a pivotal part of must all both individually and just strings of letters and me to live up to that name, emperor who was known for his identity. collectively value and be proud sounds; they can be symbols, since my name literally means his ability to control the Huang Ji also has mixed feel- of our own identities and what have hidden meanings, or be to build success. It makes me River. “I really resonated with ings about his name. “Henry” we can offer to the world and passed down through genera- strive to be a better person.” this because I just thought doesn’t exactly resonate with ourselves,” Igarashi expressed. tions. Some people love their Senior Yume Igarashi shares it was really impressive that Ji because it lacks the unique- She believes that through pride given names. Other people de- a similar sentiment. “My moth- someone was able to engineer ness and cultural significance in their identity, including their spise them and end up chang- er loves a certain manga com- and create structures to stop of his Chinese name. However, names, Asian Americans can ing what they are called. Others pany named ‘Hana to Yume’ and regulate an entire river. I he appreciates the convenience tackle racism and hate. “I think might even have nicknames or in romaji. Some of her favor- feel pretty proud that my name it brings. “At the same time, I my name holds more meaning more than one name to com- ite manga series and childhood is a tribute to him because I do really like it because it just for me now than before all of pensate for different cultural memories involved that com- think he was an impressive fig- feels very simple and like some- this started, ” Igarashi said. backgrounds or relationships. pany, and she knew that the ure,” Ji said. thing normal, where I don’t For many Asian Ameri- In the Asian American com- ‘Yume’ part would be a perfect But beyond their birth have to fuss about people mis- can students, their names have munity, in particular, people name for her daughter. She also names, some students have pronouncing it,” Ji explained. brought them pride as well as often find themselves in two loved the fact that we would chosen to anglicize their names However, he can not totally es- frustration. It is often a con- cultural spheres. The uptick both not only have the same in hopes of better fitting into cape mispronunciations, espe- stant battle between appreciat- in hate crimes against Asian initials, Y. I., but the same first American society. Fang has cially when he uses his Chinese ing the beauty and the cultural Americans has only highlighted syllable,” Igarashi explained. gone by his anglicized name, name. “[Non-Chinese people value of their identity while also the different identities Asian “Yume” is also the Japanese “John,” ever since his first- are] always confused about how living in a society that has only Americans place in their names. word for “dream” and “Iga- grade teacher gave him the to say it right and always ask me begun to scratch the surface of Freshman John Fang’s rashi” can be translated to “fifty name for easier pronuncia- to give me a correct pronuncia- anti-Asian bias. But through it Chinese name is Fang Jianye. storms.” Yume muses that even tion. “I think America really tion, and sometimes still mess all, students continue to wear “The first character in Chinese though her name does not con- likes white-sounding names, it up,” Ji expressed. all their names with pride, em- names is the surname,” Fang nect to her on a literal level, it and in a workplace, they would This mispronunciation of bracing them as beacons of explained. “The second char- reminds her of her rich cultural probably want someone with a names has had a profound ef- their beautiful uniqueness. Page 14 The Spectator • April 6, 2021 Editorials
ARTS & The Spectator ENTERTAINMENT Addressing Anti-Asian Sentiments EDITORS The Stuyvesant High Since the start of the CO- Queens, the commute to school “I thought you were supposed School Newspaper Suah Chung VID-19 pandemic, anti-Asian is laborious as is. The possibility to be good at math,” depicting Kenisha Mahajan** sentiment in America has been that their safety could be jeop- students as a part of a uniform “The Pulse Gavin McGinley on the rise. Fueled by former ardized simply walking down model minority before their of the Dexter Wells President Donald Trump’s rac- the street adds insult to injury. own unique identity. This is es- Student ist and xenophobic rhetoric With the increasing number of pecially harmful, as many who Body” PHOTOGRAPHY regarding the coronavirus, the anti-Asian hate crimes, it is not have felt unheard or unseen in EDITORS historical prejudices against surprising for students to feel a this environment, in turn, have Francesca Nemati Asian-Americans in the U.S., sense of trepidation as they are stated that they felt they need to EDITORS IN CHIEF and a stream of misinforma- commuting. Parents are telling work even harder to distinguish Morris Raskin* Sasha Socolow tion, violence against Asian- their kids to be extra careful not themselves from their peers. Karen Zhang* Americans has become increas- out of obligation, but of true In light of the increase in anti- ART DIRECTORS ingly prevalent. In the wake of necessity, while kids are fearing Asian hate crimes, it is more im- NEWS EDITORS Afra Mahmud** the shooting of eight people for the safety of their family portant than ever to combat the Jenny Liu* Adrianna Peng in Atlanta, Georgia—six of members. normalization of these micro- Momoca Mairaj Sophie Poget whom were Asian-American— The thing about hate crimes aggressions and speak out to coupled with an increase in sub- is that they are not isolated dismantle these implicit biases. FEATURES EDITORS LAYOUT EDITORS way and street attacks, many are events. While the exact timing A step we all can take is Ezra Lee now fearful for their safety. In of the violence may be unex- to educate ourselves and raise Angela Cai New York City, Asian-Amer- pected, their motives certainly awareness of the situation. Christina Pan Amy Lin icans comprise an estimated are not. They are rooted in sys- Learning more about the his- Clara Shapiro* Susie McKnight 16 percent of the popula- temic racism and discrimina- tory and pervasiveness of tion; at Stuyvesant, they make tion. So when we hear about discrimination against Asian- OPINIONS EDITORS COPY EDITORS up an overwhelming 71 per- these incidents through news Americans in tandem with chal- Maya Nelson Nora Miller cent of the student body. The outlets and social media, we lenging the monolith that the Aaron Visser* Tashfia Noor** anxiety, anger, and fear felt by grieve for those families and in Asian-American experience has Shreyasi Saha Asian-Americans reverberate a way, grieve for ourselves. But often been portrayed as helps us SCIENCE EDITORS Ruiwen Tang throughout our school com- perhaps more importantly, we to better connect with our peers Raymond Yang** munity. think about our own families and understand how to support Gerard Lin Everyone is supposed to and grieve for them as well. Our them. A part of this education Sonya Sasson** safely come and go as they parents, our aunts and uncles, is confronting our own biases. BUSINESS MANAGERS please on the streets and pub- our grandparents. They could Racism against Asian-Ameri- SPORTS EDITORS Jared Moser** lic transportation. That, how- be next. It is a heartbreaking cans is not usually explicit but is Krish Gupta Tina Nguyen ever, was not the case for the thing to acknowledge and it is normalized and often manifests Sam Levine 89-year-old woman who was lit even more painful to be unable as microaggressions or ignorant Matt Melucci WEB EDITORS on fire near her home in Brook- to prevent it. comments. These preconcep- David Chen** lyn. It was not the case for the While fears and concerns tions lead teachers and admin- HUMOR EDITORS Alyssa Choi 39-year-old woman who was over anti-Asian-American sen- istrators to unwittingly impose doused with chemicals as she timents do not often manifest their biases on Asian-American Logan Ruzzier** Andrey Sokolov took out the trash. in our school environment, it is students. Being better-informed Kelly Yip* Everyday actions, such as important to recognize the dis- individuals allows us to be more * Managing Board FACULTY ADVISER commuting on public transit crimination that the large Asian cognizant and cultivate a safer Kerry Garfinkel or walking down the street, are student body at Stuyvesant has environment for students to ** Editors-in-Training now laced with fear. Walking or experienced through acts of mi- embrace their complex identi- Please address all letters to: We reserve the right to edit letters riding the subway or bus used croaggressions. Many students ties. 345 Chambers Street for clarity and length. to represent a sense of free- can attest and relate to instances Building these safe spaces New York, NY 10282 © 2018 The Spectator (212) 312-4800 ext. 2601 All rights reserved by the creators. dom, especially for many who where a teacher confused them lets students speak up about [email protected] have stayed home for months with another Asian student or the injustices they face, both in- during quarantine. With in- continued to pronounce their side and outside of school, and check in with students, ampli- those who are grieving or need person schooling resuming names wrong despite constant promotes understanding within fying Asian-American voices a space to talk. Taking the time again, the idea of commuting correction. Microaggressions the school community. Teach- in lesson plans, or providing to inform ourselves as a school to school is not far from stu- can take the form of backhand- ers should use the classroom educational resources to stu- community of anti-Asian senti- dents’ minds. Neither is feeling ed comments that are often to create conversation around dents. Office hours or supple- ments is a necessary first step to scared. For many, especially for based on stereotypical expec- America’s rising anti-Asian sen- mentary meetings can be used increase visibility and advance those who live in the outer bor- tations, such as “I’m surprised timent, whether it is taking five as ways to offer support in a justice for the Asian-American oughs such as Staten Island or how good your English is’’ or minutes at the start of class to more intimate environment to community as a whole. Haste to Reopen Schools Impedes Recovery By ALEX CHO must not throw caution to the shared air circulation as well as a different picture: the answer schools are open does not nec- wind despite our desperation the transportation that students to whether school reopenings essarily mean that it is safe for Last week, my mother talk- to return to a life that at least take to school. have led to increased spread de- high schools to reopen; multiple ed to After a year of Zoom fa- somewhat resembles the one This commute, incidentally, pends on the situation. Accord- studies have found that adoles- tigue, pandemic optimism rules we lived pre-pandemic. Do- is another large concern: most ing to research published by the cents above 15 are three times the day as vaccinations ramp up. ing so only brings the risk of students cannot drive them- National Center for Analysis as likely to transmit COVID-19 “The worst of the pandemic is reversing the progress we have selves to school, and only some of Longitudinal Data in Edu- as pre-pubescent children. over,” sings New York Maga- made so far. have rides, exposing many to cational Research (CALDER) Due to NYC’s demonstrat- zine. The New York City De- the dangers of crowded pub- and based on evidence from ed propensity for COVID to partment of Education, whose lic transportation. While mask Michigan and Washington, spread rapidly through its dense speed seems driven by this state adoption in NYC has been a while in-person schooling has population, we should err on of euphoria, announced that School open- positive development, face cov- little effect on the incidence the side of caution. While public high schools would re- ings have led to erings are not foolproof, espe- of transmission in places with some studies seem encourag- open on March 22. There are cially as most of the masks that low pre-existing COVID case ing, they are not conclusive many reasons for this decision: a considerably people wear are not medical counts, school openings have enough to completely throw virtual learning does not work grade. Certain types of masks, led to a considerably greater out all preceding care. Doing for everyone, many students greater spread in such as neck gaiters and ban- spread in areas with high pre- so places our entire city at risk. have seen their performance dannas, have been shown to be existing case counts. Nonetheless, there needs to be and mental health suffer, and areas with high less effective at preventing the New York undeniably falls some reasonable standard to al- it is difficult to keep up with pre-existing case spread of airborne virus-filled in the second, high-risk cate- low students to return to their extracurriculars. It has been particles. The protocols make gory, with a moving average of in-person classes, which by all a drain on some parents too, counts. no distinction between mask around 3,000 new cases per day. accounts are more effective who used to rely on their chil- types or insist on the more ef- Moreover, NYC has qualities, for academic performance and dren going to school during fective N-95 mask, which is a such as its unusual density and better for mental health. The their busy workdays. However, The process of reopen- worrying indicator. crowded public transportation, data introduced by CALDER’s the rapidity of the reopening ing school comes with safety Moreover, recently pub- that have made it an outlier in research only accounted for is irresponsible and places the protocols in place, including lished research studies suggest the pandemic so far, earning populations with lower infec- greater population at risk. masks, six-feet-apart distancing, that schools have not played a the dubious title of the epicen- tion rates than 20 cases per 100 While most NYC teachers and “pod” organization to pre- large role in community virus ter of the pandemic. Few other thousand members of the com- are now vaccinated, many re- vent students in different class- spread. However, these studies locations in the world have hit a munity; it provided no evidence main unvaccinated, and three in rooms from mingling. Howev- are likely influencing the wave moving daily average of 7,000 stating that school reopening four New Yorkers have yet to er, it’s not clear that there’s been of public opinion and articles in cases (as New York City did would not impact areas with get their first shot. Sending 55 enough time to fine-tune these favor of an immediate return to just a few months ago). As the higher infection rates. For New thousand students into indoor systems and ensure they work. in-person classes. Many reports CALDER data indicates, what York City, this process would buildings where COVID-19 has The protocols also appear less have analyzed regions of the may have happened during require case counts to come the chance to spread through rigid than before. For instance, U.S. where school reopenings school openings in more rural down by about half of the cur- aerosols, especially when some a confirmed COVID-19 case have occurred and concluded and suburban environments rent rate in order to reopen. of the more transmissible will prompt the quarantining that the infection rate was not may not be replicated in New We should demand a standard strains are circulating, is a se- of a classroom but not the rest significant, especially when York. Thus, many of the pro- based on solid data and a rec- rious roll of the dice when it of the school. This response compared to surrounding com- school-opening studies should ognition of the risks inherent in comes to the safety of those ignores the likelihood of trans- munities without reopenings. be looked at skeptically. Just reopening schools but that still who the students live with. We mission through vents and However, other studies paint because elementary and middle promises an end to Zoom class. The Spectator • March 17, 2021 Page 15 Opinions A Physicist Who Never Lost Her Humanity By AYA ALRYYES cal physics.” There, she worked Germany in 1926. Even then, barium (atomic number 56) liant scientist but also a moral at the Friedrich Wilhelm In- she faced condescension and was consistently a product. one. Unlike many other nuclear The Nobel Prize Committee stitute and met influential sci- disregard, such as when news- But how could an element split physicists at the time, she tried has drawn scrutiny and criticism entists such as Max Planck, papers reported the topic of into a lighter one? He wrote her hardest to separate herself over their recipients’ lack of di- who opposed the admittance her lecture as “Cosmetic Phys- to Meitner, who had fled Nazi from the atomic bomb, reject- versity, provoking headlines like of women to universities but ics.” Germany to Sweden, to see ing an offer to work on the “The Nobels Overwhelmingly regarded Meitner as an excep- When Adolf Hitler was if she had an explanation for Manhattan Project. She resent- Go to Men” from NPR and tion, and Albert Einstein, who appointed Chancellor of Ger- what seemed like an impossi- ed the fact that it was her re- “Breaking News: White Men would term her “the German many in 1933, Meitner began bility. She wondered if it was search that made such weapons Awarded Nobel Prize, Again” Marie Curie.” Most impor- facing opposition for her Jew- possible for a nucleus to split of mass destruction possible. from HuffPost. There certainly tantly, Meitner met Otto Hahn, ish ancestry. While she lost her up into two smaller nuclei. It is for these reasons that her is cause for these headlines: as a German chemist with whom lecture position at the Universi- During a walk in the winter tombstone reads, “A Physicist of 2020, 57 Nobel Prizes have she would work for the rest of ty of Berlin, she critically main- woods, Meitner came to the re- Who Never Lost Her Human- been awarded to women com- her career. Though Meitner tained her research alization that if E=mc2,mass ity.” pared to 876 awarded to men. stood out as a brilliant mind, position at the could not be lost, but the Meitner has received some The disparity is much deeper due to the gender discrimina- Kaiser Wil- nucleus could split. After recognition for her brilliance within the sciences, where only tion in Germany at the time, helm Insti- calculations, Meitner re- and hard work. She, along with four women have received the her work in Berlin initially went tute. De- alized this split would Hahn, was the 1966 winner of award for physics, making up a unpaid, and she was barred spite the come to an extraordi- the Fermi Prize, a prestigious minute 1.9 percent of the total from using the labs, “lest her enor- nary amount of en- Presidential award. Moreover, winners for that prize. hair catch fire.” Instead, mous ergy. the extremely radioactive ele- While some of these gaps she did all of her initial re- stress Yet Hahn pub- ment 109 was named meitner- reflect pre-existing disparities search in a basement. of being lished their work ium in 1997 after her. But these within the field, research has Despite these setbacks, Jewish at without listing Meit- recognitions aren’t enough. shown that it does not account Meitner did great work the time, ner as a co-author. Put- The fact that she was passed for all of them. Even after bal- during her time in Berlin. this pe- ting a Jewish woman’s over for the Nobel Prize for a ancing those disparities, wom- She and Hahn formed the riod was also name on a scientific discovery that would not have en remain noticeably underrep- perfect pair, with her as when paper would been possible without her more resented in the Nobels. While the bold physicist and him have been than invaluable contributions is it is important that the Nobel as the methodical chemist. dangerous a huge injustice. She deserves Prize Committee prioritizes Together they discovered in Nazi the same recognition as Hahn, representation and diversity radioactive recoil, a new Germany. if not more, as she was the one, in their considerations mov- way to detect radioactivity, But some after all, who figured out the ing forward, it must also look as well as several new ra- make the actual mechanism of nuclear to its past wrongs. Addressing dioactive isotopes, author- case that fission. Even now, more than and honoring women who have ing nine papers over a two- Hahn 50 years after her death, she been overlooked is the first step year period. had been remains much less known than in making the Nobel Prize truly Meitner and Hahn moved deliber- her male counterpart. meaningful. to the Kaiser Wilhelm Insti- ately ex- Though the Nobel Com- No one is more deserving tute in 1912, where Hahn re- cluding mittee has a strict policy of only of long-overdue honor than ceived the title of “professor” Meitner awarding living people, ruling physicist Lise Meitner. Born and Meitner of “guest.” Hahn from their out the possibility of a post- in Austria to Jewish parents in appointed her his assistant later work years humous Nobel Prize for Meit- 1878, she was brought up to that year, which was the low- before the ner and women like her (most value learning and thinking for est rung on the academic lad- war began. grievously Rosalind Franklin, herself. Her parents, who had der but her first paid position. Even after Chien-Shiung Wu, and Jocelyn seven other children, insisted Though Meitner later ascended the conflict Bell Burnell), a simple state- that their daughters receive the to the same rank as Hahn, her ended and ment of acknowledgment of same education as their sons. salary remained lower than his. Adrianna Peng / The Spectator stability was wrongdoing from the commit- From a very young age, Meitner With the outbreak of World Meitner began her most impor- restored, he did not revise the tee would bestow some of the showed a proclivity and passion War I in 1914, Meitner worked tant work. paper or the narrative to in- recognition she so undoubtedly for math and science and re- as an X-ray technician on the Meitner became very in- clude Meitner. Hahn alone re- deserves. ceived private tutoring in those front lines until 1916. Upon her terested in 1934 in the work ceived wide recognition for the The Nobel Organization subjects, since public educa- return to the Kaiser Wilhelm of Enrico Fermi, an Italian discovery while Meitner came keeps its nominations and de- tion for girls was limited. She Institute, Meitner and Hahn scientist whose experiments to be known only as his junior liberations secret, so it is dif- focused her talents on gaining discovered the first stable iso- suggested the possibility of assistant. ficult to verify if they have entrance to the University of tope of protactinium, meaning creating transuranic elements, Otto Hahn received the followed through on their as- Vienna, a pursuit in which she the element’s properties could or those heavier than uranium, Nobel Prize in Chemistry in sertion that they “will continue was successful. finally be determined. For this by bombarding uranium atoms 1944 for “his” discovery of to work actively” on diversity. After receiving her doctor- discovery, Meitner achieved with neutrons. She and Hahn nuclear fission. Meitner, who Such a statement acknowledg- al degree in physics from the significant professional recog- teamed up again at her request had been nominated 19 times ing the injustice done to Meit- University of Vienna in 1907 nition, receiving the Leibniz to investigate Fermi’s hypoth- for the Prize in Chemistry and ner would be material evidence and becoming only the second Medal from the Berlin Acad- esis. 29 times in the Prize in Physics, that the Nobel Prize Commit- woman to do so, she moved to emy. Meitner became the first Hahn found almost unbe- was not included. tee is committed to just repre- Berlin, the “mecca of theoreti- female physics professor in lievable results. It seemed that Meitner was not only a bril- sentation. Sia’s “Music”: A Case for Why Representation in Casting is Important By MAYA NELSON are so many talented autistic ac- typical characterizations of au- character, abled actors tend to only serve to help others grow. tors out there.” tistic people in her portrayal of focus too much on the physical “Music” is not the first When Australian pop singer Sia responded to the back- Music, and her movements and characteristics of a disability— film, nor will it be the last, to Sia first announced that she was lash by defending her decision facial expressions are heavily which is exactly what Ziegler offensively portray a disability. releasing a film titled “Music” and insisting that casting a non- exaggerated. Rather than repre- did. To play a character, one Stereotypes, improper casting, about an autistic girl named disabled actress was “more senting the autistic community, has to have a deep understand- and the secondary treatment of Music (hence the title), it was compassionate.” Many from she is mocking them. To top it ing of the character’s mindset minority groups are issues that immediately met with backlash. the autistic community also be- all off, the film encourages us- and personality. The best ac- we must strive toward resolving. Though most of the informa- gan to take issue with Sia’s us- ing prone restraint, a violent tors are the ones who get inside Ableism is often overlooked in tion about the film had not yet age of the phrase “special abili- technique used to subdue autis- their characters’ heads, which is society, which is why it is even been publicized, one crucial ties” rather than disabled. tic people that can lead to ex- what most abled actors cannot more important to stop the cy- detail led many to demand its This backlash might have treme trauma and in some cases do when it comes to represent- cle of inaccurate depictions of cancelation: Music is played been unwarranted had Sia ac- death. The film ignores the ing disabled characters. Rather, disabled people by having bet- by neurotypical actress Mad- tually made the compassionate harmful implications of using disabled characters should be ter representation in casting. It die Ziegler. Now that the film film she clearly wanted to. In restraint and simply describes played by disabled actors. is important to speak out and has been officially released, response to these criticisms, it as “crushing with one’s love.” “Music” also brings up the criticize media that cast a harm- it’s become apparent why hav- Sia tweeted that people should The movie’s inaccurate rep- trope of disabled characters be- ful light on groups that already ing proper representation be- watch the film before making resentation of autism shows ing treated as props and aiding receive minimal representation. hind the camera, as well as in judgments. However, the con- why proper representation is the growth of an abled main Voice your opinion on whatever front of it, is so important, as tent of the film only makes important when it comes to character. Despite being mar- platform you can as spreading Ziegler’s portrayal of an autistic her choices much more prob- casting. Sia could have cast- keted as a film about Music, awareness of misrepresentation character is highly offensive. lematic. Despite being targeted ed plenty of talented autistic she ends up only serving the is the first step toward eliminat- The drama surrounding toward a disabled audience, the actresses to play Music, but purpose of teaching Zu, the ing it. The impact of seeing an “Music” first began on Twitter, movie is a cacophony of loud she chose someone who she main character struggling with accurate portrayal of oneself where hundreds responded to noises and bright colors, mak- thought would be easier to addiction, how to find joy in a on the big screen, especially the tweet announcing the film, ing it the embodiment of the work with. The issue with cast- world that may seem bleak. Mu- when it is not done so often, criticizing Sia for her decision phrase “sensory overload.” ing non-disabled actors extends sic has little to no development is tremendous: it allows one to to cast Ziegler. The National Additionally, the depiction of beyond misrepresentation: throughout the film, which have characters to relate to and Autistic Society tweeted, “Sia autism in the film is extremely rather than portraying the ac- sends a message that people are can make one feel seen—that has got this one wrong. There offensive. Ziegler uses stereo- tual soul and personality of a defined by their disabilities and one’s story is being told. Page 16 The Spectator • March 17, 2021 Opinions The Feminist Shampoo By ANISHA SINGHAL marketing strategies is a smart pockets of any organization through advertising without to change the gender ratio move for companies. For the working toward that change, solving the root of the prob- through culinary scholarships Feminism is the new trend feminist movement, however, and feminism is often just for lem. While companies appear for women, these are simply that advertisers are trying to such marketing is counter- show. to be making some effort, ei- empty statements without clear capitalize on. Slogans like “It productive. As Andi Zeisler, Commoditization of femi- ther through advertisements goals and results. doesn’t matter who wears the the founder of the feminist nism encourages symbolic or symbolic promotions, they Companies, inherently pants, as long as they are clean” organization [EXPLETIVE] feminism and develops a false don’t have to work hard or driven by profit, cannot drive (Tide), “Color for lips that Media, pointed out, “Market- sense of progress. Companies have an incentive to facilitate change without quantitative speak up” (MAC), and “Advil: place feminism comes to steal often appoint one woman to more meaningful changes, like goals to hold them account- mansplaining relief ” (Advil) the show from more explicit an executive posi- closing the wage gap, weeding able. Changes like women’s are appearing more frequently. active feminism.” The aver- tion and check the out inappropriate employees, suffrage, independence, and While pro-feminism advertise- age consumer is unaware diversity box with- granting longer maternity and harassment policies all come ments seemingly come off of the distinction between out paving a path paternity leaves, and prevent- from organizations dedicated as supportive of the feminist active feminism and mar- for other women ing sexist promotions or de- to attaining social and political movement, these companies ketplace feminism. By to follow. The motions. justice. The Women’s Rights are only profiting off of the purchasing a product that institutions and Furthermore, using a social Project successfully pushed commoditization of feminism has been marketed as movement as a marketing strat- to lift the ban on women in without actively supporting the femi- nist, egy patronizes the cause. In a combat, the National Organi- cause. For instance, while MAC publicity tactic, Burger King zation for Women has led the is supposedly encouraging tweeted, “Women belong in charge for pro-choice policies, women to speak up, they have the kitchen.” After grabbing and The National Coalition for also been called out for various people’s attention and creating Women and Girls in Education instances of racism, including an uproar for making such an lobbied vigorously for Title IX, racially motivated firings. Com- atrocious statement, they fol- which forbids gender discrimi- panies can give the impression Spectator Chloe Huang / The lowed up with another tweet nation in schools. By commod- of being progressive without explaining: “If they want to, itizing the social movement, implementing any progressive of course. Yet only 20 percent we are drawing attention away policies in the workplace or of chefs are women.” Sexism from such organizations which donating to feminist organiza- should not be thrown around are actively involved in femi- tions; all they have to do is put for a catchy advertisement. nist change and toward com- up a couple of pink posters Millions of women around panies hoping to scrape some calling for #GirlPower to be the world are trapped by the profit off a “trend.” When we considered “woke.” “women belong in the kitch- see feminism everywhere, the When companies advertise, en” mentality, where families part of the movement that is they often keep the demo- power structures and cultures often discourage genuinely pushing for change graphics of their customers a consumer is left with the that perpetuate the women from pursuing their is easily overlooked. And while in mind. Considering that 85 impression of supporting a gender divide and discrimina- own careers and passions to the flashy ads are more visible, percent of purchases are made progressive company. Most of tion in the workplace can be take care of their families in- their impact is pernicious. or influenced by women, -as the time, however, the custom- ignored, so long as companies stead. Though Burger King similating feminism into their er’s money never touches the put up a facade of progress claims that it is on a mission Stop the Silence By GULAM ing in Chinese, “You bum, why community. He has called CO- during the important meeting. fice that he viewed the spas as MONAWARAH did you hit me? This bum, he VID-19 racist nicknames, such Rhetoric like this instance di- “a temptation for him that he hit me.” as “kung-flu” and “the Chinese minishes the severity of Asian wanted to eliminate.” However, Eight people, including six A similar attack took place virus.” When we allow signifi- American discrimination; it is these are just excuses for rac- Asian American women, were in Oakland, California, where cant figures to spread this rhet- not appropriate to talk about ism against Asian Americans. ruthlessly murdered at three a 91-year-old man was bru- oric, it encourages others to feel lynching people in a joking way. We cannot use sex addictions salons in Atlanta, Georgia on tally shoved to the ground by and act the same exact way. Representative Grace Meng of to justify the deaths of Asian March 16. The victims were a young black man in a hoodie. Many attacks against Asian New York called him out for it, Americans because doing so identified as Soon Chung Park, In a different incident, a Chi- Americans are verbal and are claiming that his language was downplays the clear racism Hyun Jung Grant, Suncha Kim, nese woman was attacked in the equally damaging and telling. dangerous and will likely put “a coming from citizens and poli- Yong Ae Yue, Delaina Ash- midst of a crowded city side- During an investigation, several bullseye on the back of Asian ticians alike. ley Yaun, Xiaojie Tan, Daoyou walk outside of a bakery. The people found Captain Jay Baker, Americans across this country, Additionally, Baker’s claim Feng, and Paul Andre Michels. assaulter came out of a store, a Georgia sheriff who spoke at on our grandparents, on our that “yesterday was a really bad The suspect, Robert Aaron carrying a large box, threw it a news conference about Long, kids.” It is possible that peo- day for [Long], and this is what Long, who was seen frequent- straight at her face, and shoved promoting shirts that said “CO- ple will take Roy’s statements he did” downplays not only ing the salons, has now been her to the ground. Despite this VID-19: Imported Virus from far too seriously and cause in- the severity of Long’s actions charged with four counts of attack, few people stopped to Chy-na.” He no doubt took in- creased violence either in the but also the deaths of eight in- murder and one count of as- help her or attempted to catch spiration from the countless ac- name of justice or hatred. nocent people. Baker’s insensi- sault. tive words dismiss the sadness The deaths of these inno- that the Asian American com- cent people have sparked na- munity is feeling right now. We tionwide outrage, with many must understand that similar believing that the attack was Even then, it would be incorrect to say that the pan- language coming from govern- racially motivated. Since the ment officials is the problem. initial outbreak of COVID-19, When we diminish the deaths hate crimes against the Asian demic “caused” this wave of racism that has plagued of an entire community in this community have spiked. Stop manner, we also show that we AAPI Hate, an organization our country. Many influential politicians have publicly do not care. founded in 2020 in response to But we have to; we need to increased anti-Asian sentiment degraded entire communities in the past few years. care. We must stop making ex- since the pandemic began, re- cuses for racist behavior. I am ports that at least 3,800 anti- tired of seeing politicians and Asian attacks have occurred government officials excuse as- during the pandemic. Asian the man who hurt her. cusations that Asian Americans Not only does behavior like saults against Asian Americans. American hate is real, and it is These examples do not even are deliberately “importing” the this example encourage hatred We can no longer ignore these destroying thousands of lives scratch the surface of the injus- deadly virus into the US. towards minorities, but it also warning signs as we have done every day while people contin- tices toward the Asian Ameri- Language from powerful allows the perpetrators to get since the start of the pandem- ue to make excuses. can community in our nation government officials toward away with their crimes by di- ic. We must continue to raise There are countless instanc- and the innocent victims who the Asian American community minishing the severity of hate awareness about racism against es of violent attacks on Asian have been hurt since the pan- also tends to be racist and dis- crimes. When George Floyd Asian Americans through me- Americans that have happened demic began. Even then, it missive, which is a significant was murdered, countless social diums such as social media and in the past year alone. Elderly would be incorrect to say that problem when we try to open media users immediately came condemn those who openly Asian Americans in particu- the pandemic “caused” this up important conversations to the police officers’ defense, display racist behavior. Another lar are becoming increasingly wave of racism that has plagued about race relations. A recent saying that he was previously way is to donate to trustwor- targeted. In San Francisco, our country. example is when GOP Rep- resisting arrest but the camera thy organizations, such as Stop California, Xiao Zhen Xie, a Many influential politicians resentative Chip Roy spoke in did not catch it or that the po- AAPI Hate, or victim memorial 75-year-old Asian woman, was have publicly degraded entire a House Judiciary Committee licemen were almost in the right funds to help directly. brutally attacked in broad day- communities in the past few meeting on the rise of violence for choking him because Floyd Do not ignore current Asian light on March 17 by a male years. Former President Don- against Asian Americans. While had a criminal record. This American racism, and do not named Steven Jenkins, who hit ald Trump is a large propagator he seemed to side with the Asian practice of rationalizing the make excuses for it. Do not her in the face and caused a of several racist ideas who used community, he said, “There’s an wrongdoer’s actions is happen- allow normal citizens or high- swollen, bloody eye. Xie fought his position to spread hateful old saying in Texas about ‘find ing with Long right now. Those ranking government officials back with a wooden stick she rhetoric toward those commu- all the rope in Texas and get a who knew Long on a personal to dismiss the large problem at found near her and injured Jen- nities. He pandered to the racist tall oak tree.’ You know, we take level, and even Long himself, hand. Lastly, make sure to help kins, who was then handcuffed mindsets of many Republicans justice very seriously, and we claim that he has a sex addic- the Asian American community to a stretcher and taken to an instead of spreading the truth, ought to do that. Round up the tion so serious that it could be in whichever way you can: fi- ambulance. Meanwhile, the vic- which was made clear with the bad guys. That’s what we be- the sole motivator for his mur- nancially, publicly, or emotion- tim frantically begged passersby kind of language Trump used lieve.” This remark was insen- der in the salons. He told the ally. to help her, repeatedly exclaim- toward the Asian American sitive and disrespectful to say Cherokee County Sheriff ’s Of- The Spectator • March 17, 2021 Page 17 Opinions In Response to “A People Abandoned” By MAYA DUNAYER on criteria. Israel is no more that are connected to a national Jews in the same age group. cines. The Independent Com- and JOSHUA GINDIS responsible for the administra- network that is constantly up- This distribution is clearly not mission for Human Rights, a tion of public health in Gaza dated with patient records. This a matter of Israeli discrimina- Palestinian human rights group, In Issue 11 of The Spec- than Egypt, which also shares system makes it incredibly easy tion against any group since has accused Palestinian officials tator, Opinions writer Aya a border with and blockades for Israelis to book and receive it is beneficial to Palestinians of distributing vaccines meant Alryyes’s article, “A People Gaza. Only Area C meets the vaccine appointments, which and Israelis alike to vaccinate for healthcare workers to other Abandoned,” criticizes Israel’s criteria for occupation, and in they can do by phone or by the entire country. As U.S. politicians and their friends. vaccine distribution to Palestin- this regard, we agree with Al- text message. Though Palestine State Department spokesman Palestinian officials were ini- ians in the West Bank and Gaza. ryyes that Israel has an obliga- does have a healthcare system Ned Price put it, “We believe tially opposed to receiving vac- It discusses the “occupation” tion to distribute vaccines to with compulsory enrollment, it’s important for Palestinians cines from Israel. One official of Gaza and other territories all those living in Area C. This the standard care for a healthy to achieve increased access to said, “We are working on our by the Israeli government and distinction has not stopped Is- individual is much lower. The COVID vaccine in the weeks own to obtain the vaccine from asserts that Israel should be rael from already distributing PA spent about $294 per Pales- ahead. We believe it’s impor- a number of sources. We are responsible for vaccinating all vaccines to Palestinians outside tinian in 2012, as compared to tant for their own—for their not a department in the Israeli Palestinians. We would like to these areas. Defense Ministry. We have our break down the claims made in Israel has administered vac- own government and Ministry the article and show that Israel cines and facilitated their trans- of Health, and they are making is not obligated to distribute port to PA-controlled regions. huge efforts to get the vaccine.” vaccines to Palestinians but is It allowed the first vaccines Communication must precede still doing it anyway. into Gaza through the block- collaboration between Israel The territories of the West ade since the second week of Companies can give the impres- and the PA. If the PA denies Bank and Gaza are divided February and has been con- the aid offered to them, then into three zones: Areas A, B, tinuing its vaccination efforts in sion of being progressive without Israel cannot be accused of and C. Area A is governed by the region since. Furthermore, not providing vaccines to Pal- the Palestinian Authority (PA), Israel permitted a 40 thousand estinians. Ultimately, it is clear Area C is controlled by the Is- vaccine shipment from the implementing any progressive poli- that Israel’s incredible vaccina- raeli government, and Area B United Arab Emirates to enter tion efforts also extend to their falls under shared jurisdiction Gaza on March 18. Israel be- cies in the workplace or donating work in Palestine, even though of the two entities. The article gan its two-week campaign to they are not legally obligated to points out that the Geneva vaccinate over 100 thousand to feminist organizations; all they administer these vaccinations. Convention tasks occupying Palestinians who carry Israeli The Israeli government is powers with the maintenance work permits as of March 8. have to do is put up a couple of not being negligent and immor- of the public health of their This campaign consists of set- al in regard to the distribution occupied territories, identify- ting up eight vaccination cen- pink posters calling for #GirlPower of vaccines in Palestine and is ing Area C of the West Bank ters along the border between actually doing more than is le- and the Gaza Strip as occupied Israel and the Palestinian ter- to be considered “woke.” gally expected of them. Those territories. However, the Hague ritories. These centers have the who claim that the Israeli gov- Regulations define occupation ability to vaccinate 1,000 peo- ernment is not doing enough to as being “actually placed un- ple per day. It also opened four vaccinate Palestinians are using der the authority of [a] hostile vaccination clinics at industrial the COVID-19 vaccine as a po- army. The occupation extends centers within the West Bank. litical weapon to demonize the only to the territory where such More help is on the way, how- state of Israel. This claim is not authority has been established ever, as the PA has announced the Israeli government’s spend- own needs. It’s important for a fair assessment of the work and can be exercised.” This that it will be receiving 37 thou- ing of $2,046 per Israeli in 2011. Israel, Israel’s health and secu- that Israeli officials are doing definition does not extend to sand Pfizer-BioNTech doses Israel is also able to set up vac- rity as well.” Alryyes’s article in order to get the vaccine to Gaza, which is designated Area and 168 thousand AstraZeneca cine centers much more easily claims that Israel has been vac- everyone, regardless of where A and has not been under Is- doses in the coming months. and has set up around 400 vac- cinating Jewish settlers in the they live within the region. It raeli control since 2007. Many say Israel has not vac- cine centers across the country, West Bank, but not their Arab is essential that in the face of Since then, Israel has block- cinated enough Palestinians or including in Arab towns. In neighbors. Though Area C is COVID-19, we band together aded the Gaza Strip to protect has blocked access to vaccines fact, Israeli Arabs have a higher predominantly Jewish, Israeli to administer the vaccine as ef- Israeli citizens from “terrorism, in these territories for any sig- vaccination rate than Orthodox health workers have been dis- ficiently as possible, rather than rocket attacks and any other nificant amount of time. The Jews, with about 68 percent of tributing the vaccine to willing being counterproductive by ac- hostile activity,” which Alryyes healthcare systems in Israel are Israeli Arabs over the age of Jews and Palestinians alike. cusing certain groups of not deems “de facto occupation” superior to those in Palestine. 50 having received the vaccine Additionally, Israel has good doing enough. even though it does not meet Israel’s healthcare system con- at least once as compared to reason for skepticism about the the internationally agreed-up- sists of four main providers 62 percent of ultra-Orthodox PA’s ability to administer vac- Dead Art
Serena Chan / The Spectator Michele Yi / The Spectator Page 18 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Science Stuyvesant Hosts A Virologists Panel SCIENCEBEAT By RANIA ZAKI sections: the basics of virology, phases in their development. scales ranging from playground Pfizer and other major the current developments However, the COVID-19 to platform,” Dr. Epstein said. pharmaceutical companies “Why don’t viruses ever in the field, and explanation vaccine scenario was different. Since many students learned have started COVID-19 get less deadly?” Professor of of vaccines, especially the “We had some basic data about Netlogo through their vaccine trials in children Epidemiology at New York COVID-19 vaccine. “We for [SARS-]COV-1, we had Introduction to Computer younger than 12 to see University (NYU) Dr. Joshua wanted to establish a panel of some kind of structure that Science class, the presentation the vaccine’s effectiveness, M. Epistein asked. “It’s not in affirmative speakers that could was being used for the mass- was more familiar to the student raising hopes for herd their best interest to kill their answer most of the questions coronavirus vaccine as well as body, emphasizing the value immunity. host.” There was slight laughter the student body has about the Ebola vaccine, [...] we had an education has on impacting our as the panelists nodded their the pandemic,” sophomore enormous amount of funding, understanding of the pandemic. heads, enjoying the irony of and panel moderator Andrey [and] we had [an] emergency,” “One of [Dr. Epstein’s] main studying pathogenic viruses. Sokolov said. Dr. Mishra said. “We don’t see accomplishments is Sugarcane, The pandemic has “There’s a lot of infections With a specific the perfect vaccine […] it’s like and it was coded through aggravated America’s you’re not aware of, Josh,” demographic in mind, the flying a plane and also building Netlogo. And I think it's super weight gain problem, colleague virologist and retired Sophomore Caucus wanted to it. That’s why this vaccine relevant, as computer science is with a new study showing professor of microbiology bring in virologists for another doesn’t work with this variant. a class we are required to take that adults have gained two at NYU Dr. Carol Reiss said. reason. “There are a lot of And the other doesn’t work as sophomores,” Chan said. pounds per month on “It’s common for them to be misconceptions and questions very well with another variant.” As with all models, human average during quarantine. attenuated.” [and we wanted to] make sure Some aspects of the behavior is a confounding Organized by the that people are focusing on panelists’ work were very variable, one of irrationality Sophomore Caucus, the what’s important, and that’s the recognizable to Stuyvesant and unforeseen predilection. Virologists Speakers Panel truth and facts,” sophomore students. In the introduction Many speakers chimed in that Scientists have found consisted of five virologists— and event organizer Iris Chan of Dr. Epstein’s presentation, refusal of vaccines and masks stronger evidence that scientists involved in the said. “Agent-Based Modeling can forestall herd immunity. octopi may dream: they prognosis and mechanisms From viral loads between in Public Health: From “It’s an invitation for more have an “active” stage of of viruses—conversing about asymptomatic and symptomatic Playground to Planet,” many waves. This is not the time to sleep where they move their specialized field. With patients with Dr. Reiss to the sophomores, juniors, and do that. We are on the verge their eyes and change their approximately 100 faculty impact X-ray crystallogy has on seniors became aware of the of a [public domain] vaccine skin color. This is similar to members, students, and our understanding of virology black box with the moving stick- and real herd immunity,” Dr. rapid eye movement sleep scientists in attendance, the with Dr. Green, each speaker figures on the screen, a model Epstein said. in humans where our eyes event concluded with a Q&A sparked important discussions. described as Sugarcane. Dr. Dr. Mishra added, “A lot of move rapidly and we dream. with the speakers. Vaccines took center stage Epstein used a platform called states are not mandating masks The keynote speakers in Dr. Mishra’s presentation, Netlogo to perform a contract [...] it’s like a moth climbing on were local scientists Dr. Reiss, when he elaborated on how tracing between a scenario a stick every three inches skips [and] you are able to begin to Dr. Epstein, and Assistant the COVID-19 vaccine was of one sick child and healthy back two inches […] you will live with the virus, to start to Professor at Columbia created. “Many people [are] children, showing how “R never reach to the top of the approach something that looks University Dr. Nischay Mishra. hesitant. They say ‘I don’t want naught,” a mathematical term stick.” more like normal than what Additionally, there were to take this vaccine, it came in that indicates how contagious a With public high schools we had before,” Dr. Lefkowitz speakers from outside the city, three months, I don’t want to disease is, and the effectiveness reopening on March 22, the said. “We can only look on such as Dr. Elliot Lefkowitz and be [a] lab rat,’” Dr. Mishra said of herd immunity, determine panelists all advocated for trying to approach a new Dr. Todd Green, professors at during the panel. “But that’s risks during a pandemic. good ventilation, masks, and normal,” Sokolov said. And the University of Alabama. not true.” “Agent-based modeling is a vaccinations. “By increasing the as time progresses, this new The discussion on the speaker's Generally, vaccines take a very powerful way to model arsenal and eventually pushing normal is becoming infinitely panel constituted three longer time due to multiple public health challenges [...] at it out, everybody has access more clear. The Headless Horsemen of Slugs By KAITLYN LEE observed that many of the heart cells, specifically genes is not necessary for survival. gae they consume. They then slugs decapitated themselves that promote wound healing They theorize that the mecha- use the stolen chloroplasts to From lizards dropping their at least once during their life- and increase growth factors nism is used not only to flee perform photosynthesis, con- tails to one-armed sea stars re- times and that slugs have a that activate cell division to re- from predators but also to re- verting sunlight into energy generating their limbs, various breakage plane on their neck place dying cells and grow new move parasites within their old which allows them to sustain animals have displayed the abil- to ensure a clean cut to remove ones. bodies, after the group found the regeneration process. How- ity to self-amputate and regrow the head. While the detached that all of the slugs that ever, the chloroplasts only last organs as a means to survive. heads could grow back bod- detached their heads for a few days, so the slugs must Recently, a group of scientists ies, the bodies could not grow had internal parasites in continue eating algae until they from Japan have discovered back heads. However, just like their old bodies. After fully restore their bodies. that two species of sea slugs— the head, the separated body amputation, their heads Mitoh and her team’s dis- Elysia marginata and Elysia was responsive to stimuli for grew new bodies free covery of the regenerative atroviridis—have a remarkable months until decomposition. from parasitic infec- abilities of the Elysia marginata ability: detaching their heads Limb and organ regen- tions. Another po- and Elysia atroviridis sea slugs off their bodies and regrowing eration is a unique adaptation tential purpose for have only left scientists more their bodies from their heads. that certain organisms possess regeneration is repro- curious about what other or- What’s even more astonishing to varying degrees, for exam- duction. The researchers ob- ganisms possess such impres- is that the head and the body ple lizards, axolotls, zebrafish, served that only younger slugs sive survival mechanisms, and of the slug can survive sepa- and planarians, a group that were able to live freely as heads how. Her research on these rately for weeks, even months, includes flatworms. and grow new bodies. The slugs at a molecular level may before restoring their missing Planarians, famous older slugs, on the other hand, allow us to not only under- parts and living on with a new for their ability to Emily Tan Spectator / The only lived up to 10 days and stand the mysteries of how body. regrow their head or were unable to eat or regrow these slugs can regenerate, but Sayaka Mitoh, a doctoral even the rest of new bodies. This indicates that also give insight into the grow- student at Nara Women’s Uni- their body, rely the abilities of regeneration ing field of stem cell research. versity of Japan, first observed on stem cells, and autonomy are an indicator By expanding our knowledge this phenomenon in 2018 which have of youth for the slugs, as they of stem cells and learning how when she was astonished to the power lose them over time. they function, new possibili- find a decapitated sacoglossan to transform While the Elysia marginata ties in regenerative medicine sea slug head circling inside into many and Elysia atro- and other medical fields may the tank and eating algae. Mi- other types of cells. They have viridis sea open in the future. Individu- toh noted that the wound on a certain type of stem cell slugs can als suffering from medical the head appeared to be self- called neoblasts throughout For the regener- conditions, such as spinal cord inflicted. While she thought the body, which allow them to Elysia marginata ate, the re- injuries and blood-related dis- the slug head would die due to regrow masses of tissues that and Elysia atroviri- growth process eases like leukemia, could one its lack of internal organs, it have been removed. On the dis sea slug species, expends large day be cured using stem cells began regrowing its body back other hand, zebrafish, which Mitoh and her group amounts of en- as a treatment, putIndividuals instead. Three weeks later, the can repair major organs like believe that stem cells, ergy. Despite this suffering from medical condi- slug head grew 80 percent of the heart, brain, and pancreas as in planarians, play a sig- need for energy, tions, such as spinal cord inju- its body and vital organs back through regeneration, take a nificant role in the slug's re- the heads are still ries and blood-related diseases and was observed to be per- more localized approach. For growth capabilities, and hope able to live, wan- like leukemia, could one day fectly replicated from its old example, initiation molecules to further study the sea slugs dering freely and eating as if be cured using stem cells as a body. from wounds in the heart sig- to understand their regenera- they are still one whole organ- treatment, putting their lives at This led Mitoh and her fel- nal heart regeneration to the tive abilities on a molecular ism. What allows the sea slugs ease, all thanks to the decapi- low scientists to closely study zebrafish. The presence of level. As for the regeneration’s to remain mobile is a process tated head of a sea slug. their groups of Elysia marginata and these molecules results in in- function, they are still unsure, called kleptoplasty, where slugs lives at ease, all thanks to the Elysia atroviridis sea slugs. They creasing gene activity in the especially because decapitation steal chloroplasts from the al- decapitated head of a sea slug. The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Page 19 Science The Immortal Jellyfish By ANGEL LIU shaped, and propelled by cilia, and physical threats at any time functions, such as epithelial some transdifferentiation small hairlike structures that during its medusae phase. The cells, blood cells, and fat cells. cases, a cell would need The familiar concept of protrude from their edges. jellyfish would first transform Stem cells are usually restricted to dedifferentiate into an birth and death as a one-way As planulae, they attach into a cyst with an exterior in the type of cell into which unspecialized stem cell before finality does not apply to the themselves to a solid surface redifferentiating into some Turritopsis dohrnii. Dubbed and develop into their polyp other specialization. In the the immortal jellyfish, the phase, which is a stationary, Turritopsis dohrnii, the cells of Turritopsis dohrnii is a species cylindrical form that certain its polyp and medusae forms of jellyfish in the hydrozoa marine species undergo. In contain completely different class, characterized by its the first half of this phase, cell types. It is still unknown dominant polyp phase and the planulae form a colony of how the jellyfish are able to small medusae form, that polyps called a hydroid colony. return to a previous stage in returns to its youth in a A tubal structure, the hydroid their life cycle, though it has constant, renewing cycle. colony stations itself using a been noted that a gene in the The immortal jellyfish is stolon (a stem-like structure) mRNA may be responsible quite small. Upon reaching and buds, branching out for this transformation. maturity, it only extends to a along its length like coral. The Ever since this special height of about 4.5 millimeters, branches consist of polyps, characteristic of the Turritopsis or 0.18 inches—small enough which can be either male dohrnii was discovered, it to fit on a pinky fingernail. Its or female. Through asexual has been of interest to body is translucent and bell- reproduction, the polyps Nelli Rojas-Cessa Spectator / The the media and scientists in shaped, and in the center, the detach from the parent colony the field of regenerative stomach is an eye-catching and mature into medusae, the medicine. In transplants, a red. There are up to 90 thin, final form of the jellyfish that transdifferentiated cell would string-like tentacles extending we are most familiar with. be much more stable than from the muscle ring at the In most species, the a stem cell whose future bottom of its bell. juvenile medusae will grow trajectory is harder to control. Like all jellyfish, the into their adult state, where It also has a high potential for Turritopsis dohrnii starts out as they can sexually reproduce, treating neurodegenerative an egg and undergoes external release eggs or sperm, and diseases like Parkinson’s fertilization, where the female die. For the Turritopsis dohrnii, of chitin. It would remain in they can differentiate by the disease. Through the jellyfish’s jellyfish releases unfertilized however, it can revert back that form for 24 to 36 hours area they are located in. For ability to recycle its cells, eggs into the water. The eggs to its polyp phase when it is before becoming a polyp once example, hematopoietic stem scientists can study ways to form planulae, the short-lived near the end of its lifespan. again. This is possible due cells can only differentiate into replace damaged cells and larvae stage of a jellyfish, It does not even have to be to a cellular process called cells of the blood and immune neurons. Today, scientists are after coming in contact with in old age as the process can transdifferentiation. system. Transdifferentiation continuing their studies on the sperm released by the male. be conducted in response to Cells can differentiate is when a matured, Turritopsis dohrnii in hopes of At this point, they look suboptimal conditions such as from stem cells into a wide specialized cell switches to unlocking the secret of their similar to bacteria: flat, oval- starvation, physical damage, variety of types with different another specialization. In eternal youth.
Why You Should Continue Taking Notes by Hand By RIONA ANVEKAR their comprehension of conceptual questions. When an electroencephalogram with information, strengthens a TED Talk that covered the two groups were tested about 250 electrodes picking the hand-brain circuitry and You open a Google interesting, but not well- again a week later, the writers up the electrical impulses deepens understanding of the Docs file with your AP US known, information. Half of once again outperformed the of brain activity. The results content. History notes and sigh in the students showed that Additionally, using a relief. No longer do you have took notes by both adults laptop or technological device to worry about asking your hand while and children distracts both the student teacher to wait before going the other half had higher taking the notes and the to the next slide, missing an took them on brain activity person teaching the material. important fact, or suffering a laptop. The when writing A study conducted at the from severe hand cramps. students then by hand University of Essex looked Though taking notes on an completed compared at the effect of the presence electronic device may seem three to typing on of an electronic device on easier, studies actually suggest distractor a keyboard the relationship between two that note-taking by hand is tasks. After 30 because the people having a conversation. more effective in retaining minutes, they use of pen 74 participants were assigned information as well as were asked and paper to a room with a phone understanding concepts. to answer gives the brain either present or absent One reason why writers factual-recall more “hooks” and were asked to hold a perform better is that they questions and to hang conversation for 10 minutes cannot write down all the memories on. with a counterpart. Those words their professor speaks Specifically, with a phone present in the and are therefore forced writing room reported feeling less to summarize the material, by hand close with their partner and a subconsciously processing triggers more lower quality of relationship and engaging with it activity in the than the pairs without one. more. On the other hand, sensorimotor Though most teachers cannot / The Spectator Teo Vivian typists may transcribe parts of the tell if you go on your phone the professor’s lecture brain, as more during class, taking notes or word for word, which is senses are even leaving your phone on known as non- activated by your desk impairs your ability generative note feeling the to stay engaged during class. taking, which pen press on It makes you feel less close does not involve any paper, seeing to your teacher and thus less processing of information. the letters interested in the conversation Furthermore, those who you write, or lesson. include sketches and and hearing So, the next time you drawings in their notes the sounds go to class, try pulling out a are more likely to recall Yaqi Zeng / The Spectator you make notebook and taking notes the lesson better: when conceptual- typists. while writing. These sensory by hand. It is likely to help people visually represent application Another study conducted details strengthen neural your comprehension of and knowledge, they can questions. at the Norwegian University connections in the brain and engagement in the lesson your deepen their comprehension While both of Science and Technology increase learning, allowing teacher is teaching, which is of concepts. groups performed analyzed the brain activity of us to learn and remember especially valuable, as it may A study conducted at equally well on the factual 20 students who took notes better. Generally, cognitive relieve some of the hardships Princeton University tested questions, writers performed by hand and typing. In both engagement, the manipulation that many are facing with 65 college students on significantly better on the experiments, participants wore and transformation of online learning. Page 20 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Science The Origin of the Ice Age Reaction By SHAH NABIL that turned into ice sheets. western part of the Cordilleran in the Cordilleran Ice Sheet change and bring heat and Later, a process known as ice Ice Sheet had a direct correlation correlates with the ice calving moisture to the Laurentide Imagine that a chunk of ice calving caused several sections with the ice calving in the in the Laurentide ice sheet, Ice Sheet without being the size of multiple football of the ice sheets’ borders to Laurentide Ice Sheet. Through suggesting that the calving of blocked. These two theories fields broke off of an ice sheet break off into their neighboring the analysis of specific sediment the West Cordilleran Ice Sheet both offer explanations as to and sank deep into the ocean, oceans. This process occured cores (layers of accumulated in the North Pacific Ocean how heat was brought to the increasing displacement of on such a massive scale that was the precursor to Heinrich Laurentide Ice Sheet from the ocean levels and flooding across the world’s ocean levels greatly events. Cordilleran Ice Sheet through the seven continents. This is increased due to the ice chunks The exact the Pacific Ocean. Confirming what occurred during the end falling into water. Eventually, details of these theories would bring a of the last ice age 11,000 years the Earth’s tilt angle increased the events better understanding of how ago—a global climate change due to gravity changes in the between the West ice calving, a process that event where, according to axes, causing an increase Cordilleran Ice occurs today at the polar caps, the World Economic Forum, of temperatures that Sheet calving and can dramatically change the temperatures averaged 46 melted most of the ice the Heinrich events are environment of the Earth. degrees Fahrenheit, about 10 sheets. Furthermore, the unknown, with several Nevertheless, more research degrees below today’s average Laurentide Ice Sheet hypotheses having been into ice sheets is needed to temperature. The ice age went through ice calving proposed. One proposed understand the process of ended with the breakage of ice during the Heinrich by Mix discusses how the how a single ice sheet caused a sheets into the Atlantic Ocean, events, further increasing Cordilleran Ice Sheet chunk reaction of warming, possibly which scientists believe was the temperatures that melted into the Pacific through more sediment core responsible for climate change. throughout Earth. Ocean eventually reached the analysis of other ice remnants However, new information Remnants of the Atlantic Ocean through Earth’s in North America. sheds light on how changes in Cordilleran ocean currents. Since the chunk The new developments on the Pacific Ocean were actually Ice Sheet became freshwater, it created the Cordilleran Ice Sheet with the cause of the latest ice age. still exist, a blocking mechanism to the the ice age illustrate why it is This explains why there needs important to do further to be more research on past research on previously environmental events to ensure established studies. accurate data for the future of If we can study the Earth’s dynamic climate. causes of climate To understand how the change through ice Pacific Ocean was one of sheets, we can find the causes of climate change, ways of predicting it is important to understand the future as global the history of two planetary warming continues ice sheets and the ice-calving to pressure the Earth. process. The Cordilleran and For example, we can the Laurentide Ice Sheets were Jenny Chen / The Spectator help prevent destruction two ice masses that spanned of agriculture and save east and west, respectively, and scientists use them to sediment that can give historical salt water in the Atlantic and lives. Therefore, the overall of what is now Canada and discover new insights into the information) retrieved from the theoretically would make the knowledge gained by the new Greenland. The two ice sheets relationship between the ice age Gulf of Alaska, they were able water near the Laurentide Ice data of the past allows us were created through glaciation, and global warming. to conclude that the ice calving Sheet warmer and trigger ice to assemble safety measures where a combination of Earth’s In a Science journal report in the Cordilleran Ice Sheet calving. Another possibility for future generations and lower tilt angle, orbit, and less published on November 6, occurred shortly before the is that through the calving of ultimately understand the heat from the Sun caused 2020, Alan C. Mix, along with Heinrich events. Additionally, the Cordilleran Ice Sheet, the occuranges of dynamic shifts in gradual accumulation of snow other scientists, argued that the the study found that ice calving planet’s surface winds would climate change.
A.I. Understands the "Beauty Standard" By SHRIYA ANAND signals through dopamine. By understanding than their “Tinder status.” standard” becomes even more Using this knowledge, as subjective preferences, much The technology can also find apparent, as “ideal” features What does “attractive” well as face-generating software, can be achieved. Many apps its use in the beauty industry, are used to generate an “ideal” mean to you? You may take researchers at the University currently use manually entered as versions of the program face. Though our society a look at people you find of Helsinki and the University data or a user’s pattern of could sort through applications is slowly departing from attractive and list similar of Copenhagen conducted interactions with the app to without humans having to beauty represented through features: perhaps a sharp nose an experiment to provide personalize content. With manually flip through each Eurocentric facial features, a and soft jaw or apple cheeks a machine with knowledge advances in this research, the one. It could generate a “base majority of models, actors, and almond eyes. But even regarding human perception makeup gurus, celebrities, with these descriptions, it is and test its accuracy. They first and representatives of the difficult to imagine what you gave a Generative Adversarial beauty industry still fall under consider “ideal.” With the use Neural Network (GAN), that category. It is no surprise of artificial intelligence (A.I.), a type of artificial neural that creating the “ideal” however, this may no longer be network, the task of generating We should be taking a step away from attractive face will pursue this the case. hundreds of portraits of consolidating beauty under a strict standard. standard. With the addition A.I., or the usage of people. These images were of this research, an idea that a software to create a system to presented to 30 volunteers, While this research may be successful in particular face with particular perform tasks such as speech whose responses to the features is better than any other recognition, visual and odor photos were recorded through the STEM field, it seems destructive on a is cemented as the portrait is perception, and decision- electroencephalography. The humanitarian level. artificially created to combine making, has become more volunteers looked at the images “superior” traits. This is a step prevalent over the years. while electrodes on their scalp backward from the idea that From Siri’s interaction with monitored their brain activity. beauty comes in all shapes, the average person to robots When an individual saw an sizes, and forms. assisting doctors in surgery, “attractive” person, the left There are many concerns A.I. makes an appearance on a ventral tegmental area of software can better align with image” reflecting target features with the implications and daily basis. the brain became active and the user’s interests, especially or looks of a certain model implementations of this new A.I. now has the ability released dopamine. The data since hashtags or likes are not agency as a means of creating research and there is no doubt to understand a human’s was then provided to GAN, the only determining factors a pool of applicants that aligns that it will exacerbate the biases perception of attractiveness, which evaluated it and produced in whether a user will find the with the photoshoot’s concept. that society already carries. a difficult task even for a new face built from the most content interesting. Tinder, Despite such potential Perhaps a subtle and less direct humans themselves, as beauty prevalent characteristics in the for example, puts users on a benefits, the software presents use of the software could make is incredibly subjective. Since “attractive” faces. These new hierarchy by assigning points several ethical questions. The technology more personalized many cultural and psychological images, which were tailored for every left and right swipe program ultimately feeds into for the user, though it may factors unconsciously influence to the individual’s preferences, and then pairs people with harmful beauty standards. never entirely escape ethical one’s preferences, it is difficult were matched against the similar points with each other, While its impact can be sugar- criticism. We should be taking to identify or evaluate what one control group to check the though this algorithm is quite coated as reflective of a single a step away from consolidating considers “beautiful.” Yet it is accuracy of the program. The faulty, as taste is subjective. person’s preferences, there is beauty under a strict standard. relatively simple for a machine results were satisfactory: the With A.I., however, the app no denying that Eurocentric While this research may be to discern when an individual generated face aligned with the could provide users with features have become the successful in the STEM field, finds someone attractive, as volunteers’ preferences over 80 profiles that are consistent with beauty standard. With the it seems destructive on a their body emits different percent of the time. the user’s preferences rather use of A.I., this “beauty humanitarian level. The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Page 21 Arts and Entertainment Television “Ginny & Georgia”: Netflix Is ‘Woke’ By IVY HALPERN demn racism, there seem to be exemplifies the feeling that the “The Office” (2005-2013). of it is presented in the show, no far too many problematic parts. characters are just used as pawns The show can’t even get the one really knows who Ginny is. “Hey Ginny & Georgia, 2010 One racist trope in the show is by Netflix for their races, as the relationships straight. Ginny and She obviously has complicated called and it wants its lazy, deeply Ginny, the stereotypical mixed scene uses racism to create con- Georgia are first portrayed as mental health issues, but if the sexist joke back. How about we race protagonist, living with flict. having a great mother-daughter show is going to show clips of stop degrading hard working her white mother. Frequently, It seems as though every relationship as Georgia says in her self harm, it should explain women by defining this horse mixed race characters presented character in the show is used the first episode, “We are like the why or at least provide context [EXPLETIVE] as FuNnY.” — on television are being raised by about her mental health instead Taylor Swift their supportive, white parents, of just cutting to these dark mo- If Taylor Swift critiques a which in turn presents the non- ments. show, does that mean we have to white parents as “absent.” This Scenes of Georgia’s tough dislike it too? Probably. But af- stereotype of mixed raced fami- backstory are scattered through- ter a quick viewing of “Ginny & lies is frequently used in Netflix out the show as well, serving to Georgia,” to nobody’s surprise, Originals, including “To All the make her character more con- Swift is right. Not only does the Boys I’ve Loved Before” (2018), fusing. The background scenes show incorporate a random and “The Main Event” (2020), and of her getting abused or being uncalled for insult to Swift, but “The Baby-Sitters Club” (2020-). homeless are trying to incite em- the many problematic comments Georgia’s whiteness, in addition pathy, but that’s hard when she in the show are also just one fac- to the town they live in, presents does pretty demented things like et of the failures of this wannabe the show through an extremely have her six-year-old son punch progressive show. whitewashed lens. another kid in the face or when This faux play on “Gilmore Another controversial aspect she seems to get everything too Girls” (2000-2007) begins with of “Ginny & Georgia” is show- easily through her pretty privi- Ginny’s (Antonia Gentry) move cased in a clip going around so- lege, southern accent, and smile. from Texas with her mother cial media which viewers titled All these actions are normalized Georgia (Brianne Howey) and the “oppression Olympics.” In in the show when they really are brother Austin (Diesel La Tor- the scene, Ginny and her half- not normal, and the audience is raca) to a “cute,” small town in Taiwanese boyfriend, Hunter Iris Lin / The Spectator asked to accept a lot of contrived Massachusetts. In the first few (Mason Temple), hurl hurtful, bi- to represent a different minor- Gilmore Girls.” However, their plot lines without characters to minutes of the series, several ased insults at each other. Ginny ity, and each character seems to relationship is always on and off root for. different themes are introduced: first affronts Hunter by saying he come with a different, undevel- in such a jarring way, which just Barely entertaining enough to race, single motherhood, com- is barely even Asian, and he later oped background, which leads leaves the viewer with the im- watch while procrastinating on ing of age, and more. Only one retorts by saying, “I’ve never seen to lots of confusion about each pression that the relationship is homework, “Ginny & Georgia” thing is clear: too much is go- you pound back jerk chicken.” character and very little screen toxic and lacks logic. only manages to catch viewers’ ing on. It seems like some sort They tear each other down using time to get to know each one. Moreover, though it may attention through the attractive, of amalgamation of drama and racist comments, reducing both Of course, racism, sexism, seem natural for young view- stereotypical, “boy next door” comedy until the show cuts to to prejudiced stereotypes rather self harm, and sexual assault are ers to support the protagonist male lead. Additionally, it’s al- random dark scenes that don’t than people. The actors also said issues that should be discussed in during such arguments with ways important to normalize mi- seem to have a place amongst in a later interview that these in- the media, but putting all these parents, the scriptwriters make norities on mainstream TV, but all the other lighter plotlines of sults weren’t even scripted. The heavy subjects together in 10 epi- both characters inconsistent and “Ginny & Georgia” includes this high school relationships, friend- actors were told to make them sodes makes for the mess that is difficult to like. Ginny seems to representation in an extremely ships, family, and small town life. up, which they did based on their “Ginny & Georgia.” Now that act extremely shallow with her poor and problematic way. It’s These dark scenes and flash- own past experiences. This scene streaming is so popular, Netflix new friends in one moment, and crucial to support shows and backs, which include clips of is over the top and offensive, has created a brand with all their then she seems to be genuinely characters having progressive self harm or sexual assault, are which sparked an intense back- new originals, including “Ginny enjoying herself in the next. Her values, but when it’s overdone, a whiplash-inducing tonal shift lash on social media. Neither the & Georgia,” that can’t help but personality is constantly chang- it seems really fake. Hey, Netflix, from the main elements of the actors nor characters are devel- try way too hard. If Netflix ing. The show makes it seem as stop putting on this progressive show. oped or advanced enough for the wants to attract viewers, all they though Ginny has such a convo- mask just because it’s trendy. For a show that tries to con- scene. Additionally, the dialogue really have to do is bring back luted background, but since none
Film “Minari” and the Rediscovery of Humanity at Its Roots By SUAH CHUNG other hand, is disenchanted with Soonja (Youn Yuh-jung), Moni- ality, swearing during card games face covert racism, with one boy the family’s trailer home and wor- ca’s mother, who brings a subtle and watching boxing matches in asking David why his face is flat Across the grassed expanse ries about the far distance from balance to the household. Jacob her briefs. David’s reluctant ac- and a girl making random sounds I reach toward the horizon, the city and its hospital, which and Monica’s diverging views take ceptance, in all its charm, makes to Anne until she happens to my face bronze against the light, they will need to visit to check a backseat, and the film moves their later playful bond all the create a Korean word. In later the American Dream. on David’s heart condition. The on to explore the grandmother’s more endearing to the viewers. scenes, the Yis’ view of Chris- “Minari” opens with the roll- Soonja’s interactions with David tianity grows more complex as ing hills of rural Arkansas, pic- not only provide the audience the symbols begin to represent a turesque for its simple beauty with comedic relief, but also a conflict in their immigrant expe- but also jarringly empty, which symbolic change in scenery as she rience. From Jacob’s farm, which is further emphasized by a gentle is the one who leads the children he names “Garden of Eden,” to a piano playing in the background. into the nearby forest. Given Da- baptism-like scene in which Mon- Directed by Isaac Chung, this vid’s heart condition, his mother ica helps Jacob rinse his hair after film is a heartfelt nod to his child- doesn’t allow him to run or ven- his arms are sore from farmwork, hood and memories of growing ture off. Under his grandmother’s they struggle with the extent to up as a first generation immigrant guidance, though, David finds the which they should rely on their in Arkansas. Guided by a quiet courage and freedom to explore faith to get them back on track to and mature sensitivity, “Minari” on his own. success. vibrantly captures the emotional In the depths of the forest, With its sweepingly dynamic struggles of family life, ambition, the titular object of the film—mi- and vibrant cast, “Minari” is and isolation that pervade the im- nari—is introduced. With seeds more than just an Asian Ameri- migrant experience. Cadence Li / The Spectator she brought from Korea, Soonja can immigrant story of struggle Chung illustrates his story two spouses serve as foils to each interactions with the other fam- plants minari, a Korean herb that and identity. From the subtle cin- through Jacob (Steven Yeun) and other—contrasting reflections of ily members. After the audience can withstand harsh weather and ematography to standout writing, Monica (Han Ye-ri), a couple the American Dream—as they learns that Soonja is Monica’s grows easily without much care. it paints an intimate sketch of a originally from South Korea who prioritize family in different ways. only remaining family in Korea, Minari represents the universal regular family unit and their in- decide to move to Arkansas with Jacob’s efforts for his family stem Monica’s recurring tears for sim- resilience of immigrants, who, in dividual characters. Told from their two children Anne (Noel from his ambition as he wants to ple things like ingredients that her their independence and hardship, multiple perspectives, “Minari” Cho) and David (Alan Kim) af- finally succeed out of pride for mother brought from Korea are emerge the stronger for their ex- manages to capture every facet ter trying unsuccessfully to settle his kids, while Monica wants a heart-rending and show her quiet periences. of the struggle for the Ameri- in California. Finding the job of safe home and sees the debt that strength in the way that she has The implementation of can Dream, weaving a narrative chick sexing (separating chickens may result from his endeavour. repressed her homesickness for Christian motifs throughout the that reflects the present rather based on their sexes) monotonous Jacob’s struggle to find a water her children. film is also significant, since in than dwelling on past nostal- and unfulfilling, Jacob persuades source on the arid farmland and Though the slice of lifelike the middle of rural Arkansas, the gia. Though the film does slow the family to move to Arkansas the danger of impending torna- scenes with Anne and David is church is the only form of com- at times, it uses silence and the so he can attempt to achieve his does only exacerbate the tensions, already charming, Soonja’s dy- munity that the Yis encounter. landscape to show rather than tell dream of starting a farm and busi- which erupt in fiery arguments. namic with the children, specifi- The church welcomes the fam- the story’s progressions. Most of ness selling Korean crops. At the Though the discussions end cally David, steals the spotlight. ily with open arms, but there is all, “Minari” remains undeniably beginning of the film, Jacob is an in a tense standstill and seem to David initially does not want to also a degree of discomfort as human, depicting crippling heart- unfettered idealist, only capable mark a breaking point, the narra- share his room, saying that Soon- the mostly white members don’t ache and love at opposite ends of of seeing the idyllic aspect of the tive instead takes a turn in a dif- ja “smelled like Korea.” Though really know how to interact with the spectrum, and it is stunning in American Dream. Monica, on the ferent direction with the arrival of a bit coarse, Soonja is a person- the family. Both David and Anne its genuine execution. Page 22 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Arts and Entertainment The Grammys: Music Playlist Music’s Medium-Sized Night By LIANNE OHAYON, singing “cardigan,” “august,” Of The Year—an award more reenacted an instance of po- CHRISTINE LIN, and and “willow” from her albums so geared toward the production lice brutality, followed by shots KENISHA MAHAJAN “folklore” (2020) and “ever- rather than the composition of a of protests, and a memorable Music more” (2020). Bruno Mars and recording—went to “everything speech from activist Tamika Mal- Music has a special place in Anderson .Paak (as musical duo i wanted” by Billie Eilish. Eil- lory. The scene was out of the the hearts of many. Whether Silk Sonic) crooned “Leave the ish sheepishly took to the stage ordinary for the Grammy stage: Meme-ry it’s rap, pop, or country, musi- Door Open.” Doja Cat danced to accept her award, using her instead of tiptoeing around a cians of all genres and back- her heart out to the (arguably speech to praise fellow nominee, message, the performance con- By THE ARTS & grounds come together in the overplayed) “Say So,” BTS daz- Megan Thee Stallion, whom demned police brutality outright self-proclaimed “biggest night in zled with an energetic rooftop Eilish felt was the rightful win- and took a strong stance on the ENTERTAINMENT music”: the Grammys. After be- performance to “Dynamite,” ner—and not without reason. Black Lives Matter movement. DEPARTMENT ing postponed two months due and DaBaby and Roddy Ricch While Eilish’s song was popular, But even glamorous per- to the pandemic, music lovers showcased a curious choral ar- it just didn’t gain the same trac- formances and nominations In the spirit of the Disre- finally got to experience incred- rangement of their song “Rock- tion or have the same effect as couldn’t fully cover up contro- spectator, take a listen to ible singing, a diverse spread of star.” Megan Thee Stallion and Be- versies within the Grammys. this compilation of meme-d awards, and even some record- As for the awards yoncé’s “Savage.” Nevertheless, Upon releasing nominations in songs that the Arts and En- breaking moments on March themselves, winners this “Savage” still managed to take November of 2020, the Acad- tertainment Department re- 14, despite criticism from stars year were relatively home two awards: Best Rap Per- emy quickly accumulated back- alized weren’t half bad. about how truthful the show is. dispersed, with no formance and Best Rap Song. lash for snubbing several artists. The night featured many single artist sweep- These awards, coupled with Be- After the top artist of 2020, The eclectic performances by artists ing awards in yoncé’s wins for Best R&B Per- Weeknd, received no nomina- whose songs stood out amidst any of the ma- formance and Best Music tions for his immensely success- the commotion of this past year. jor categories. Video, for songs “Black ful album “After Hours” (2020) Baby I’m Yours Though a few sets were pre- Whether this Parade” and “Brown and record-shattering hit “Blind- Breakbot recorded, they brought us back was a purpose- Skin Girl,” respec- ing Lights,” he boycotted the Nu-disco to what music’s biggest night ful strategy by tively, have now Grammys, stating “The Gram- is truly about: the music. Be- the Record- secured Beyoncé mys remain corrupt.” ginning in front of the Staples ing Academy to the title of the Several celebrities—includ- WAP Center, Harry Styles opened the reduce any post- female artist with ing Zayn Malik, Ariana Grande, Cardi B feat. Megan Thee Stallion show with a rendition of his hit award backlash is the most Gram- and Nicki Minaj—spoke out Hip-hop song “Watermelon Sugar” that up to debate. A mys. against the Grammys and their had all viewers swooning over less surpris- Some other nota- opaque voting process. In 2020, his vocals, fashion sense, and ing aspect of ble winners of the former CEO of the Recording Replay funky dance moves. Billie Eilish the night, night included Academy Deborah Dugan even Iyaz however, Harry Styles’s said that “The Grammy voting came next, standing on top of R&B Pop a car singing her touching bal- was Tay- “Watermelon process is ripe with corruption.” lad “Everything I Wanted,” and lor Swift’s Sugar” for This lack of transparency is a win of the Best Pop breeding ground for inequalities, sister trio HAIM closed off the Crank That (Soulja Boy) opening acts with the alternative prestigious Solo Per- as demonstrated by the lack of smash “The Steps.” Album Of formance, major awards given to Black art- Soulja Boy Hip-hop Other major performances The Year Joanna Meng / The Spectator Nas’s ists over the last decade. followed the original Grammys award for her “King’s Disease” (2020) for Even though this year’s format viewers are familiar with. mid-quarantine release, “folk- Best Rap Album, Megan Thee Grammys delivered perfor- First was Dua Lipa’s pretty-in- lore.” Some other notable con- Stallion for Best New Artist, and mances and a great range of Man’s Not Hot pink set, featuring songs from tenders in the category included Lady Gaga and Ariana Grande’s winners, feelings of dissatisfac- Big Shaq her album “Future Nostalgia” “Hollywood’s Bleeding” (2019) “Rain On Me” for Best Pop tion among artists still linger. Hip-hop (2020). Megan Thee Stallion by Post Malone and “Future Duo/Group Performance. If this is really music’s biggest performed a powerful medley Nostalgia” by Dua Lipa. While This year’s Grammys had night, it is imperative that quality of “Body” and “Savage,” which the latter didn’t win Album a rather serious undertone. In not be sacrificed. It’s clear they Ya Tabtab was full of glitz and glam, as well Of The Year, “Future Nostal- light of the social justice move- can make a show happen; music Nancy Ajram as a questionable tap routine. In gia” went on to take home the ments across the U.S., artists’ lovers just want more than what Arabic Pop a performance with Cardi B, the award for Best Pop Vocal Al- performances reflected our po- the Grammys delivered. Pas- two joined forces to perform the bum. litical climate and delivered more sionate performances coupled vibrant and scandalous “WAP,” H.E.R.’s “I Can’t Breathe” than just a night of extravagance with truthful nominations and Istanbul (Not Constantinople) featuring a high-heel-shaped won Song Of The Year—a fairly and escape. The most politically- winners would make this show They Might Be Giants stripper pole and gigantic bed. anticipated win considering the charged moment of the night truly deserving of the title “mu- Alternative Later in the evening, Taylor relevance of the lyrics to the was Lil Baby’s performance of sic’s biggest night.” Swift shone in a cottage scene, current political climate. Record “The Bigger Picture.” The set Lemonade Internet Money feat. Gunna, Don Toliver, & Nav Behind the Titanic Success of Hip-hop Television Never Gonna Give You Up “Attack On Titan” Rick Astley By JULIE Yeager (Yūki Kaji) and these to venture beyond the walls and morality were never raised. Giv- Blue-eyed Soul GRANDCHAMP-DESRAUX first moments take place on the face the Titans. Though the first en the premise of humanity vs. and ANIKA AMIN day of his great loss. Adapted season seems to lack any sort of the unfeeling monsters that hunt from Hajime Isayama’s ongoing depth aside from freeing human- them, there’s no question of Geronimo Birds glide through a sunny manga of the same name, “At- ity from the Titans’ predatory who one should root for, right? Sheppard blue sky, reflected in the bright tack on Titan” is set in a world rule, the following three seasons This could not be further Pop green of a child’s wide-eyed where the threat of Titans, hu- shockingly become centered from the way that things panned stare. The townspeople have mongous humanoids with a around more complex themes out. The flesh-eating Titans, gathered together in silence, hunger for flesh, has forced hu- such as racism, government cor- strangely enough, are among the A Thousand Miles staring at something that has yet mans to live behind a series of ruption, and the subjectiveness least monstrous things in this Vanessa Carlton to be revealed. Towering stone three walls. After 100 years of of morality during war. show. As the show progresses, it Pop walls loom, and dread builds peaceful living, the outermost Though popular, when the becomes increasingly clear that as an enormous hand grips the wall is breached, and humanity anime first came out in 2013, nothing is as it truly seems. Time top. The sinewy head of a crea- is faced with great terror once critics labeled the show as catch- and time again, expectations U Can’t Touch This ture slowly comes to peer over again. Provoked by the destruc- ing, but ultimately nothing new. are subverted, mysteries unrav- MC Hammer the wall, engulfing the horrified tion of his hometown and the An angry and loud teenage boy eled, and with every question Hip-hop onlookers sin a vast shadow. A death of his mother, Eren vows furiously chasing a dream— answered, countless more arise. child’s somber voice is heard, to kill all the Titans. that’s the plot of almost every Isayama skillfully weaves a tale narrating all that is to come. Season one follows 15-year- shonen anime to exist. The char- full of intrigue and uncertainty. Hayloft “On that day, humanity received old Eren and his two friends acters were likable but lacked sig- With each season, the scope Mother Mother a grim reminder: We lived in Armin Arlert (Marina Inoue) nificant depth. From the onset, of the characters’ aims widens. Alternative fear of the Titans, and were dis- and Mikasa Ackerman (Yui much is left intentionally vague. Endless buildup culminates in a graced to live in these cages we Ishikawa) after the loss of their Little is revealed about the Ti- plot twist so large that fans joke called walls.” With this, “Attack homes and families. In an effort tans’ behavior, much less where the genre changed after season Funkytown on Titan” reels viewers in with to avenge their lost loved ones, they came from, or what hap- three. Lipps Inc. the very first scene. they train to become members pened to the rest of civilization. Disco Those green eyes belong to of the Survey Corps, the only The goal of the show seemed continued on page 25 the series’s protagonist Eren military regiment bold enough too simple, and questions of The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Page 23 Arts and Entertainment “Good Girl” Turns Dateable: Thinkpiece The Movie Makeover Trope By SHIVALI Before meeting Lewis, Ward for a pink, flowery headband in no issue with self-care and luxu- (1999), a film that centers KORGAONKAR unabashedly flaunts messy hair “The Breakfast Club” (1985) or ry, but many of these makeovers around an intelligent feminist and promiscuous clothing, but Tai Frasier trading her flannel lack self-interest as they are al- named Kat Stratford, who falls If you’ve ever watched a Lewis tells her she “could be so for a plaid skirt set in “Clueless” ways initiated by and for a third in love with the “bad boy,” Pat- rom-com, then you’re probably much more.” Like a knight in (1995), these movie makeover party, whether that be a man or rick Verona. In the midst of familiar with the helpless, nerdy shining armor, he swoops in and scenes act as a way to fix soci- a popular friend. These films their love affair, both Stratford girl trope that has polluted Hol- finances her high-end make- ety’s misfits instead of accepting fail to recognize that true trans- and Verona have emotional and lywood for decades. Being too over. She replaces her wardrobe them for who they are, declaring formation is not physical. At physical transformations, but untamed to find a respectable with satin gloves, lace-trimmed that a woman is not worthy of the end of the day, the glamor- neither force them to change man, she must endure a series of hats, and fitted dresses that sat- appreciation until she under- ous makeup and high-end outfit who they are at their cores in or- shopping sprees, outfit changes, isfy Lewis’s desires. Transfor- goes a metamorphosis from an will be taken off, and the char- der to win the love of the other. and drastic haircuts to finally re- mations like Ward’s promote unpalatable free spirit to a pol- acter will be left with the same Similarly, “Juno” (2007) high- veal her new and improved self a sexist and classist idea of ished Hollywood beauty. This clumsy and improper personal- lights the life of a fiery, inde- in a dramatic staircase descent, beauty, declaring that the only message is especially harmful to ity that the “transformer” tried pendent teenager who falls back prom night entrance, or school way a woman can be respected the young female audience, who to hide. Whatever emotional in love with her high school hallway strut. This “movie in this world is by wearing over- assumes that the way to correct enlightenment that occurred in boyfriend and her child’s father, makeover” is the film industry’s priced designer clothing. In fact, their flaws is through physical al- union with the physical changes Paulie Bleeker, without ever female equivalent of a man’s su- it takes a movie makeover for terations. Even more damaging is hardly shown. As soon as the changing her hairstyle or buy- perhero transformation. Think Ward to be treated with respect is that these physical alterations man is secured, the credits start ing a new dress. Neither Strat- Peter Parker, but instead of from high-end store manag- always involve the hyper-sexual- to roll. This portrayal affirms ford nor Juno MacGuff have spider webs and superhuman ers and hotel concierges, creat- ization of actresses playing the the notion that all you need is to mask their intelligence or strength, the woman gets four- ing the impression that expen- roles of young women, such as a new look and the right man assertiveness to become more inch heels and a blowout. sive beauty equates admiration. Regina George or Cady Heron to fix your problems, which ex- approachable to men, and that’s Often, these makeovers are While a physical transformation in “Mean Girls” (2004). Our acerbates patriarchal and sexist how transformation should be used as a method to suppress can aid an emotional one, Ward film industry ingrains a superfi- values and is especially prob- approached in film. More film- a woman’s individuality and and other female protagonists cial meaning of self-worth into lematic for young viewers. makers need to understand that please a third-party “transform- seem undeserving of view- girls’ minds, permanently dam- There are ways to display character development does not er.” In the film “Pretty Woman” ers’ respect until they have the aging their individuality in ex- character development without rely on a girl ditching her glasses (1990), Vivian Ward, a broke sex wealth and beauty to support change for societal acceptance. confining a woman’s worth to for contacts or sneakers for sti- worker, meets Edward Lewis, an their emotional development. The problem is not the mov- her appearance. A perfect ex- lettos but instead finding self- affluent businessman, who hires Whether it be Allison Reyn- ie makeovers themselves but the ample of this depiction is “10 love and independence. her to be his fake girlfriend. olds ditching her grunge mullet way they are portrayed. There’s Things I Hate About You”
Television A (Wanda)Vision of Success By ASA MUHAMMED later revealed. Wanda and those attempting gave viewers the chance to un- mestic exploits of Wanda and and SAMIRA ESHA With only nine episodes (and to stop her serve as the perfect derstand and connect with the her neighbors, and experience no plans for a second season) setup for a suspenseful ending leading characters more than their suffering through pained The fourth phase of the dedicated to a somewhat com- to the show. ever before while exploring the close-ups and awkward (if not Marvel Cinematic Universe has plicated plot, Matt Shakman, the Even with so much potential MCU even further through their sinister) glitches, and that dual- officially kicked off with - Mar director of the show, and all the for the series finale, some MCU eyes. ity brings nuance to Wanda’s vel’s brand new original series actors involved did a marvel- superfans felt as though the con- “WandaVision,” in trend character. With each laugh-track “WandaVision.” Elizabeth Ol- ous job at progressing past the clusion of “WandaVision” was with other MCU properties, was triggering misstep, it becomes sen and Paul Bettany reprise a record (and server) breaking more clear what Wanda is hid- their roles as Wanda Maximoff hit, all without sacrificing cre- ing from, and how she’s doing and Vision respectively and are ativity and intimate character it. The fun the audience experi- introduced, confusingly, as a portrayals. A lot of the show’s ences with Wanda builds a con- married couple living in West- success comes from embracing nection that allows them to em- view, New Jersey. Set after Vi- the quirkiness that a lot of other pathize with what would drive sion’s death in “Avengers: Infin- comic book movies and shows her to take a town hostage. The ity War” (2018), the series has shy away from. Previously, tan- comic book zaniness gives a no shortage of mysteries and gential comic book properties lightness to the story while pos- secrets for the audience. How- existed as either gritty re-imagin- ing ethical dilemmas, in a way ever, “WandaVision” doesn’t ings or they’d heighten the camp that’s cohesive enough to avoid only succeed in being entertain- to the point of parody and fore- a jarring transition from sitcom ing and engaging, it also displays go the tone of the source mate- to cerebral drama. a level of creative boldness that rial. When Marvel decided to ex- While the balance of char- sets it apart from everything plore darker themes within the acter and absurdity is impres- Marvel’s done before. MCU, the stories were relegated sive, “WandaVision”’s true feat The first few episodes of to a semi-canon Hell’s Kitchen is bringing such an unconven- the show follow a classic sit- grounded firmly in grim realism. tional story to mainstream au- com structure, a choice which While Daredevil (2015-2018), diences. While there is no story undoubtedly puzzled long-time Jessica Jones (2015-2019), and comparable to “WandaVision” fans of the Marvel Cinematic Luke Cage (2016-2018) are all in execution, shows like FX’s Universe (MCU). The laugh great shows, they shy away from “Legion” (2017-2019) or HBO tracks, dialogue, and black and the unorthodoxy of blind ninja Max’s “Doom Patrol” (2019-) white scenery contrast dramati- lawyers with echolocation, pur- have delivered moving stories cally with the action-packed ple men, and bulletproof skin, wrapped in comic book camp.
nature and modern-day vocabu- Susannah Ahn / The Spectator for fear that these traits would However, these shows, while lary of typical Marvel films and detract from the story. In the great in their own right, lacked shows. Wanda and Vision first sitcom style and allowing it to anticlimactic. Vision’s storyline case of DC, the Harley Quinn the budget and direction to be arrive in the 1950s in a com- crumble as the plot itself dras- and character development were animated series pokes fun at the brought to mainstream audi- pletely different environment tically shifts. The show transi- somewhat inconsistent with pre- dramatizations we tend to over- ences. “Legion” was visually from their previous appearanc- tions perfectly from Wanda’s vious plot points in the MCU, look in the Batman universe, as stunning, but too slow for casu- es. Wanda plays a light-hearted, made-up town to those who ex- especially his death in “Aveng- well as comic book fans them- al viewing, and “Doom Patrol” traditional American housewife, ist outside of it, making it easy ers: Infinity War.” Additionally, selves, but while enjoyable, the faced the opposite problem in contrasting with the tough, So- for viewers to follow along as while the show introduced sev- world of the show feels like that its story and characters far kovian witch that viewers were they shift from one location to eral new and interesting charac- more of a caricature of the outshined its budget, leaving ex- most familiar with, while Vi- another. The first few episodes ters, fans hoped for appearances comics than a reimagining. tensive character arcs and seam- sion portrays a hardworking start off in black and white, but from various superheroes from “WandaVision” differs in lessly woven comedy limited by and loving husband. The two color gets incorporated gradu- the comic books as well as an that it not only uses its absur- budget-constrained visual ef- lead characters face little adver- ally as the show moves from in-depth backstory for specific dity to its advantage but does fects. “WandaVision” brings a sity, especially compared to their decade to decade and becomes characters. However, because of so without sacrificing the depth palatable and visually appealing past adventures. Wanda and Vi- more grounded in reality. Olsen several filming difficulties due of the story. Traveling through story to casual audiences, with sion seemingly go from fighting brilliantly portrays the differ- to COVID-19, many introduc- sitcom-like gimmicks enhances its commercial success a hint to- off villains bent on annihilating ence between Wanda’s facade tions were not possible for this the storytelling, rather than de- ward the evolution of the super- mankind to trying to impress of an idyllic sitcom life and her specific series. Though the series tracting from it. That absurdity hero genre, one where complex Vision’s boss. It’s initially diffi- realization of the damage she’s finale strayed from many of the becomes surreality, and both stories are made accessible and cult to understand the rationale causing to the innocent people viewers’ wishes, it did not take are able to coexist within the depth isn’t synonymous with re- behind the production and plot for her perfect reality. The first away from the overall quality of confines of the story. The audi- alism. decisions, but the significance is few confrontations between the entire show. “WandaVision” ence is able to laugh at the do- Page 24 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Arts and Entertainment Thinkpiece Those Girls Got “Moxie”
By ROXY PERAZZO out the school. ‘90s, especially in its soundtrack. ness by allowing her to avoid any dia. Also, Vivian’s love-interest, With Vivian’s gradual femi- The score features Riot Grrrl, a punishment, despite being the Seth (Nico Hiraga), represents Amy Poehler’s new Netflix nist awakening, “Moxie” pro- subgenre of punk characterized creator of “Moxie.” The way the increasing number of men original, “Moxie,” was released vides a great analysis of the by its feminist messaging. When that the punishment pans out, who support feminists in their this March, bringing a feminist learned acceptance by women Vivian returns home after giving though, makes it seem like they, actions and demonstrations. perspective to the stereotypical of harassment. When Lucy Lucy her dismissive message, she Claudia especially, just serve as a Seth is the first to find out that American high school. Based on first stands up to Mitchell, Viv- blasts Bikini Kill’s “Rebel Girl,” way for Vivian to learn about the Vivian is the creator of “Moxie,” the 2015 novel by Jennifer Ma- ian pulls her aside and tells her one of the most influential Riot ways women of color participate but he does not go behind her thieu, the film manages to high- that she should ignore it. Lucy Grrrl songs, as well as one less in feminism. back or lose interest. He instead light both the negative and posi- and Vivian’s responses represent than fitting for pre-zine Vivian. That is not to say that Lucy supports Vivian’s efforts by tak- tive experiences of young girls the dichotomy of attitudes to- As the movie progresses, Vivian and Claudia don’t have charac- ing part in the shows of support as they juggle friendships, rela- ward harassment: staying silent, increasingly embodies the rebel ter arcs. Both characters are well for “Moxie” by drawing hearts tionships, and social activism. or as modern beliefs emphasize, girl Lucy has been to her. thought out, have real emotions, and stars on his hands and at- “Moxie” centers around high speaking out. Lucy refuses to Though Riot Grrrl empha- and develop as characters out- tending the walkout toward the school junior Vivian (Hadley back down, even when Vivian sizes feminist solidarity, it is side of their relationships with end of the film. Robinson), who, after finding tells her it might be a bad idea. without the intersectionality of Vivian. The movie also features Though “Moxie” is fiction out about her mom Lisa’s (Amy The zine doesn’t really get modern feminism. Because the the experiences of a trans girl, and some aspects of the move- Poehler) rebellious past, anony- started, though, until a list that main figures of the genre and CJ (Josie Totah), who joins the ment within the school are a bit mously starts the zine “Moxie” places students, including Viv- movement were white, cis-wom- club and shares her experience over-the-top, the film succeeds to discuss feminism and its place ian, into categories like “never en, the possibility of a revival of with being dead-named, as well in sparking a conversation about at her school. Vivian is initially been touched” or “best rack” Riot Grrrl has to address that. as a disabled character, Meg the harassment of young girls. inspired by a new student, Lucy is released. A new, unnamed “Moxie’’ attempts to amend (Emily Hopper), who points out While most other portrayals of (Alycia Pascual-Peña), who is (but obviously awful) category this lack of inclusivity by intro- the lack of inclusion she receives high school ignore the issue, continuously harassed by foot- is added just for Lucy, pushing ducing Claudia and Lucy, two from her peers. Two players “Moxie” centers on the uncom- ball player and all around jock- Vivian over the edge and leading women of color, to the main from the girls’ soccer team who fortable reality while simultane- archetype, Mitchell (Patrick her to create the first edition of cast. Throughout the film, the are fed up with the lack of fund- ously drawing light to the com- Schwarzenegger). Though Vivi- “Moxie.” The zine calls out the additional obstacles they face as ing and support they receive, panionship of teenage girls. Lots an is slow to accept the presence actions of Mitchell, as well as the activists are portrayed; they are despite being better than the of movies struggle to integrate of harassment at her school, lack of action by other male stu- the first to face the consequenc- football team, also join the club politics with the rest of their once her movement gets started dents, and points out the gross es of the feminist controversy, and try to make a change within stories, but “Moxie” manages to it quickly becomes far bigger nature of the list and the stu- with their struggles used to high- the school. The bonds created serve as both a classic coming of than just her. As “Moxie” rapidly dents’ strange acceptance of it. light the interplay between race, within the group highlight the age story and a powerful social gains supporters, a club with the Because “Moxie” was in- politics, and feminism. The plot solidarity and companionship critique in an amusing yet real- same name is started, causing spired by Vivian’s mom, the film tries to show the privilege that teenage girls can have, which is istic way. plenty of controversy through- revives the feminist culture of the Vivian has because of her white- often overlooked in popular me-
Culture God Save the Queen
By LIANNE OHAYON and the royal family not providing people’s hearts.” Tragically, Di- als. But this massive heat mainly unprecedented way. YASMINE CHOKRANE them as much protection from ana, along with her new lover comes from the reverberating The revenge dress was worn the ruthless tabloids compared Dodi Fayed, was killed in a car impact the monarchy holds on on the night a documentary Prince Harry, Duke of Sus- to her counterparts. crash in 1997. The death of the Western pop culture. One key aired in which Prince Charles sex, and Meghan Markle, Duch- Though the interview high- people’s princess came a year example is television series “The admitted to having an affair, one ess of Sussex, sat down for lighted questionable aspects after her husband admitted to Crown” (2016-), a historical fic- of many clandestine scandals an interview with TV mogul within the institution, this is not having an affair, bringing mas- tion drama that takes viewers that have come to be associated Oprah Winfrey on March 7, a new occurrence. It became sive backlash onto both Charles through Queen Elizabeth II’s with the Royal Family. The other 2021. “There is no subject that increasingly clear that the royal and the entire family due to their reign. Initially, when the United recent one was the question of is off limits,” promised Winfrey, family was not the ideal that it lack of support, intent to cover Kingdom was a monarchy, the Prince Andrew, Queen Eliza- and the interview certainly de- made itself out to be, especially up the scandal, and overall toxic Royal Family was particularly beth’s son, and his associations livered. Over the course of the in the 1980s with the treatment environment which contributed relevant in Western govern- with Jeffrey Epstein, who had two hour-long special, topics of Diana, Princess of Wales. to Diana’s misfortune. mental affairs. Part of that was been federally charged with sex including race, mental health, attributed to the position the trafficking of minors. Epstein’s and relationships between vari- monarch held in government as circle of friends was notorious, ous members of the royal fam- the head of state, with the rest and Prince Andrew was known ily were discussed. Meghan of the family supporting their to be a core member, allegedly opened up about having suicidal affairs. Nowadays, the monarch even visiting Epstein on his is- thoughts throughout her time as and their family mostly serve a land in the early 2000s. The in- a member of the royal family, symbolic role, with the majority vestigation into Epstein, and the saying that she felt “trapped” af- of government leadership fall- clamoring for Prince Andrew ter numerous pleas for help with ing onto the shoulders of the to be held accountable for his members of “the firm” brought prime minister. relationship with the criminal, her nowhere. In addition, she That isn’t to say the royal got so overwhelming for Prince mentioned an appalling con- family isn’t overwhelmed by re- Andrew that he had personally versation that occurred behind sponsibilities. According to the requested to take a break from the scenes involving the race of Royals’ official website, the Roy- his royal duties. the couple’s first child, Archie, al Family “carries out over 2,000 Of course, that’s nothing as an anonymous member of official engagements through- compared to Meghan and Har- the royal family was concerned out the UK and worldwide,” ry, who have requested to “take about “how dark his skin might which includes official State a break” from their royal duties be when he is born.” events, receptions, banquets, permanently. After watching the This interview left the world garden parties, national celebra- interview, it’s clear why. in a state of shock, as the pub- tions, and national mourning. Still, “Megxit” has raised lic had been largely unaware of This omnipresence in the global questions about the relation- the damage and emotional bur- sphere is what makes their lives ship between the Royal Family den that accompanies a role in so pervasive in our culture. and its people, as well as how the royal family. But that was For example, Princess Di- sustainable this public obsession the point. One threatening part ana was known in the media with their image can be. of this facade that is frequently sphere for her iconic fashion There is no doubt that the overlooked is the media. The moments. She wore her heart royal family has been a center- British press has a huge role in on her sleeve, in that her clothes piece of British history for cen- delineating between the “com- often conveyed the way she was turies, and despite the scandals, moners” and the monarchy feeling or the significance of the royal family still has a signifi- with an “invisible contract,” as the event perfectly. Also known cant cultural impact across the noted by Markle. They hold un- for the boldness in her choices, world. To many, they can pro- checked power and are able to Diana distinguished herself in vide a sense of unity amongst
twist headlines to portray cer- Rin Fukuoka / The Spectator her experimentation: she was the people when they need it tain people more favorably than the first woman of the Royal most—a constant in people’s others. For example, there were Formerly known as Diana Spen- This accident is still incred- Family to wear trousers to an lives. But the beauty of life is stark differences between how cer, she married Charles, Prince ibly relevant, and it has irrepara- official evening event, matching that there are no constants, and the media looked at Kate Mid- of Wales, in 1981, and had two bly tainted British history. Many them with bow-ties and tuxedos, there shouldn’t be an “ideal” to dleton, Duchess of Cambridge, sons, William and Harry. Her in- today believe that the royal fam- and—of course—the infamous live up to. The royal family is when she was pregnant, com- fluence took Britain and the rest ily was accountable for Diana’s “Revenge (Mini)Dress” that had perpetuating this notion of per- pared to Markle. She believes of the world by storm, earning death, and they idolize her leg- a plunging neckline and fell off fection, when in reality, they’re that those headlines were due to her the title as the “princess of acy while demonizing the roy- her shoulders in a daring and far from it. The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Page 25 Arts and Entertainment Music Kings of Leon: The Best Contemporary Rock Band? By MATTHEW WAGMAN ther, traversing the South to the latest top 40 earworms, but voice. Rather, the arrangement ergy that can never be tamed, save people’s souls. Or maybe perfectly constructed to capture closely approximates the feel- always moving forward without The past year has been, it’s because of their first album, the most relatable human emo- ing of being with the band, their thought of the past, only the fu- needless to say, mentally and written largely in their parents’ tions. “When You See Yourself ” songs coming straight from the ture. Why should we care about emotionally strenuous for us all. basement while they were on the (2021) is their eighth and most heart. While they do continue this type of music anymore? We’ve had to learn to live apart cusp of adulthood, and their en- recent album, and though the a style of riff-centric pop-rock Why should we listen to a genre while still trying to maintain con- suing fame—not in their coun- members are middle-aged, they popularized by the likes of The that arguably had its last gasp nections. We’ve had to rethink try of origin but in the United haven’t slipped in talent whatso- Strokes and Coldplay in the with ’90s grunge? What more everything about how we live Kingdom as they were hailed ever. early 2000s, none of their songs can be accomplished beyond and how the world works and as one of the most promising Their last album, “WALLS” ever feel stale. Every single that? This is not just the music grow our social consciousness. bands of the twentieth century. (2016), saw them honing what one is still based around guitar, of a few middle-aged men from But most importantly, we’ve had Or, it could be because of their had become their signature are- bass, and drums, and you con- the deep south playing five- to seriously examine the state of transition into the global pop na rock sound, but on “When tinue to hear the signature drive minute songs when our great- the world and the way it’s ended world, with their 2008 smash You See Yourself,” they tran- of the bass, the lazy sweep of est contemporary hits barely up. It’s important to work, but singles “Sex on Fire” and “Use scend it. Make no mistake, this the electric guitars, and reverb- get past two. This is not just the it’s not easy, and sometimes we Somebody.” is still music that will capture heavy, compressed laments of music of white people stuck in need a break. But we don’t just How did a garage rock band an audience of thousands of the singer on songs like “Stormy the past. This is the music made need a little rest and relaxation, from Tennessee reach almost screaming fans, but the very Weather,” which is followed by on the guitars originally carried a short break where we can sit the same level as the modern danceable tracks, with deep the wellspring of sound and by those Latinos who inhabited around worrying about the fu- pop-rock giant Coldplay, and syncopated bass throbbing un- harmony that consolidates into the Wild West, the style popu- ture—we need rock & roll. We why would they still be relevant der languid tears of lead guitar, the powerful ripping chords of larized by the African Ameri- need some roaring guitars, some today? Kings of Leon makes a and a snarling, muscular rhythm “Golden Restless Age.” can Blues singers continuing a folksy singing, a driving bass— kind of rock music that other guitar offer much more than a It’s no wonder that “The tradition that followed their an- some good, soul-affirming mu- genres can’t hope to match in its pop sensibility. The lead singer Bandit” was the lead single for cestors, the style then appropri- sic. We need Kings of Leon. emotional expression and genu- Caleb Followill’s soulful (and this album, with the wailing gui- ated by white people and spread But why Kings of Leon in ine relatable feeling: the power still fairly southern) voice— tar rising and falling over the over the world. There is no hat particular? What sets them apart of a person playing a real instru- singing classic themes of love, constant, loping pace of the in this music, no bigotry—only from the countless other bands ment and singing in their own loss, and Americana—mixes bass, and the straining tones the purest consolidation of our representing the slowly dying voice. Kings of Leon makes naturally with the well-crafted of the frontman’s narrative. He land’s shared musical heritage genre of rock & roll? Maybe the kind of music you can sing and expertly played instrumen- sings the quintessential Ameri- and the purest expressions of it starts with their origin story: along to without having ever tation. There’s no overproduc- can story of the lawman trying human emotion. This is the three brothers traveling with having heard it before, musical tion to make the guitars just to catch not just a man, but the music of the people; this is the their Evangelical Preacher fa- compositions not just catchy as ornaments around the singer’s entire spirit of a nation, an en- sound of America.
Television Behind the Titanic Success of “Attack On Titan” soar through the air to fight. The to avenge his lost loved ones be- have practically grown up with and leaving fans wondering how continued from page 22 voice actors consistently deliver comes deep commentary about Eren and the scouts, making the they never saw it coming. convincing and emotional per- the competing conceptions of dramatic changes all the more Freedom is a concept that The success of “Attack formances. The musical score is good and evil. shocking. The boy who was once has long enthralled the human On Titan” can be attributed to one of the best in anime, inspir- Set during a period of war labeled as a forgettable protago- psyche, and it’s a major theme in many things. Its insightful so- ing feelings ranging from patrio- between three different sides, nist has transformed into an in- the series. From Eren’s constant cial and political commentary tism to tear-jerking sorrow for the show focuses on one prin- disputable antihero. Characters monologues, to the recurring and intricate plot riddled with the comrades lost along the way. cipal idea: no side is inherently once viewed as antagonists are motif of birds, to the “wings of gut-wrenching twists and turns Initially, “Attack On Titan” “good.” All three are commit- thoroughly humanized. Isayama freedom” adorning the back of provide for an addicting and was hardly mainstream or re- ting horrific atrocities, and yet has always been liberal with the the Scouts’ uniform, it is an ever- enthralling series. Its gruesome vered. That changed as the show all sides have their justification. number of character deaths, and present idea. As the characters and intense action scenes are in- progressed, causing its popular- By providing backstories for season four takes it to another have been literally trapped within credibly animated, filled with an ity to skyrocket, and garnering complex and well-developed level. Though viewers are largely the walls, living like livestock for astounding amount of detail and positive attention outside of characters on all sides, Isayama divided on whether they stand in the Titans, this fixation on free- precision. From the very first Japan, particularly in the States. easily throws viewers into a me- support of everyone’s actions, dom makes a lot of sense. But episode, the colorful and unique It’s fairly clear why the transition ticulously planned out world there is an almost unanimous long after circumstances change, art style has made it more aes- from season one to its following that evokes some sympathy for consensus that the tremendous the same struggles remain. Just thetically appealing, in contrast seasons boosted its popularity: everyone, and nobody at the character development is one of as we grapple with the concepts to a dark and bloody storyline. once its creator began getting same time. Still, at the end of the highlights of the series. of liberty, freedom, and equality The production value only more obvious with the show’s the day, each side contributes A single chapter of the in the real world, the show deep- serves to heighten the shocking underlying themes, the series to innocent deaths. Though it’s manga remains, and readers still ly examines them, making sure betrayals, glorious triumphs, and started becoming more and tempting to root for your favor- have no clue as to what the end to portray a variety of perspec- crushing losses of the show. The more relevant. ite character, it’s equally impor- will be. No one is truly worried tives. As we draw near to the bit- animation has remained consis- Unless you read the manga, tant to remember that their ac- though, as Isayama is a mas- ter end, we find ourselves closer tently phenomenal, highlighting it’s hard to see the political un- tions aren’t any more justifiable ter of intricate long-term writ- to answering an age-old ques- the riveting action scenes and dertones in season one, which than those of the people they’re ing. The seemingly insignificant tion, and perhaps the series’s striking character designs. The are anything but subtle as the fighting against. details scattered through years most important takeaway: what Titans are truly repulsive, and show progresses. What used to Season four was a game of the series always eventually does it mean to be free? the soldiers inspire awe as they be a show about a boy wanting changer for the show. Viewers come together, filling plot holes
ADVERTISEMENT Page 26 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Sports Cricket The Inspiring Story of Shakib Al Hasan By NAKIB ABEDIN While playing one of these games, bowler. This decision paid off, as which was comfortably higher charges. The blow of the punish- an umpire was impressed by his Al Hasan’s bowling performance than Tendulkar’s 61.18. Putting up ment was somewhat softened by Despite being unknown to skills and got him to try out for a that game turned out to be one of these numbers while being an all- the COVID-19 pandemic as there most Americans, Shakib Al Hasan professional club. In the first ball the best in the entire year. Since rounder is simply remarkable, and were few cricket games between is one of the most successful and he ever bowled, Al Hasan got a then, Al Hasan has been equally his individual performances in that March and October 2020. talented cricketers in the world wicket, which would be the first of adept with the ball and bat and has World Cup were legendary. Moving past the ban, Al Hasan right now. He is Bangladesh’s star many to come across his lifetime. slowly become one of the best all- Al Hasan’s career wasn’t with- can look forward to the next player and was ranked as the num- He was forced to use a tennis ball rounders in history. out hurdles, though. After the World Cup. At 34 years of age, ber one all-rounder (a cricketer throughout his childhood because Al Hasan’s career-defining per- amazing World Cup campaign, the 2023 World Cup may be his who is equally adept with the bat cricket balls are expensive and re- formance would be his heroics in he received a one-year ban from last. However, he is surrounded by and bowling) in all three formats quire high maintenance. After that the 2019 ICC Cricket World Cup. cricket between October 2019 and promising talent and a squad with of cricket in 2015, becoming the debut performance, he worked his He put up unprecedented num- October 2020 due to charges on a blend of youth and experience, first and only player ever to do so. way up the ranks until he was se- bers, scoring an incredible 606 the infringement of corruption including seniors such as Tamim Al Hasan has won numerous tro- lected to represent Bangladesh in runs while also taking an impres- protocol. It is important to note Iqbal and Mushfiqur Rahim and phies and has become one of the U-19’s cricket. sive 11 wickets. He was the man of that Al Hasan never actually ac- youngsters such as Mohammad most beloved players across the Al Hasan started to play regu- the match in every one of Bangla- cepted bribes. He received an offer Saifuddin and Mehidy Hasan Mai- globe. However, the success in his larly for the national team between desh’s wins. Surprisingly, he played from bookmakers and chose not raj. If he can replicate his perfor- career came from humble begin- 2006 and 2008. In the earlier years only eight games out of a pos- to act on it. However, under ICC mances in the last World Cup, he nings, and his journey is an inspi- of his career, he was deemed sible nine because a game versus protocol, a player has to report may hold a strong claim to be the ration to cricket fans worldwide. more of a batsman than a bowl- Sri Lanka was canceled due to the cases such as these to the Corrup- greatest all-rounder of all time. Al His story starts in a village in er, despite being an all-rounder. weather. He was on track to beat tion Commission. Many viewed Hasan’s diligence and passion got the Khulna district of Bangla- However, in a test match versus the all-time record of 673 runs this punishment as too harsh, but him to where he is right now, and desh, where he played for various New Zealand in 2008, Al Hasan’s set by Sachin Tendulkar, boast- Al Hasan fully cooperated with his story is an inspiration to a gen- village teams across the country. coach played him as a specialist ing a batting average of 86.57, the investigation and accepted the eration of fans. Soccer Eden Hazard’s Predicament at Real Madrid By SHAFIUL HAQUE always been a dream for Hazard, a 4-2 win against Granada FC on fell short of expectations, both of time before we see him back play- who stated, “I’ve always dreamed October 5, 2019. Hazard began pundits and his own standards, ing, and hopefully he won’t pick With two Premier League of Real Madrid. I’m not just say- to contribute to the team, record- no blame should be given to the up another injury. [...] I think it’s a titles, nine trophies, and over 20 ing it today because I’ve signed ing three assists in the next five Belgian. Devastating injuries have bit of bad luck. It’s not been easy individual awards, Eden Hazard here. It’s been that way since I was matches. However, in a Champi- plagued his progress, making it on the player. We have to maintain is a soccer star known around the a kid.” However, two years later, ons League match against Paris hard for him to adjust to a new a positive attitude. He’s a great globe. The Belgian is recognized he still hasn’t established himself Saint-Germain, the left winger league and squad. player. We need him back 100 per- as one of the best attacking play- at the Bernabéu. From being a suffered an ankle injury after a Unfortunately, injuries con- cent.” ers in the world, whether it is for world-class player to an athlete rash challenge, which left him off tinued to disrupt Hazard from Regardless of which club you his creativity or goal-scoring abil- suffering with injuries, what went the pitch for three months. establishing his former creative support, it’s sad to see a talented ity. He began his youth career in wrong for Hazard? Hazard missed Real Madrid’s self. Already seven months into player such as Hazard held down Belgium before moving to France Hazard was unveiled as a Real Copa del Rey and Supercopa de the 2020-2021 season, he has only by injuries. It is very likely that if to play for the Ligue 1 club Lille Madrid player on June 13, 2019 España campaigns and returned made 14 appearances. Hazard suf- the Belgian fails to recover from OSC. After a five-year spell, in in the Santiago Bernabéu sta- from injury in a La Liga match fered from a multitude of muscle his injuries, Real Madrid will have 2012, Hazard transferred to the dium with fans present. He took against Celta de Vigo. Yet again, injuries, starting from September no other choice than to transfer 2012 Champions League winner the number seven shirt, formerly six days after his return, Hazard to December to February, and he him. However, people should re- Chelsea FC and established him- worn by club legend Cristiano fractured his fibula bone in his is currently dealing with another alize that Hazard is a world-class self on the European stage. In Ronaldo. Already having joined calf and was out for three months. one right now. Real Madrid has player, and he has given full effort seven seasons with the Blues, he one of the best clubs in the world With the COVID-19 virus halting suffered greatly on the creative when he played this season. His made 352 appearances and scored and taking the legendary num- soccer until the summer, the Bel- side of the game, with midfield- poor form and culmination of in- 110 goals. After winning the Euro- ber of one of the best players to gian was able to recover from his ers Toni Kroos and Luka Modrić juries are obstacles that all soccer pa League, in 2019, Hazard moved ever grace soccer, Hazard was put injury, and in June 2020, he made giving their best for the club. athletes go through, and it’s a mat- to Spanish giant Real Madrid FC under a lot of pressure from the his way back on the pitch. Upon Zinedine Zidane, Real Madrid’s ter of how they handle them that in the summer transfer window. soccer community and from Real his return, he recorded assists in manager, has been questioned by dictates whether or not they can The club coughed up a large sum Madrid fans. After joining Madrid, his first two matches against SD interviewers about his thoughts go back to peak form. Hopefully, for Hazard, offering him a five- he picked up a hamstring injury, Eibar and Valencia CF. Real Ma- on Hazard’s difficult situation. if Hazard stays in full fitness, we year contract worth $100 million which pushed his debut back half drid eventually won La Liga, with The Frenchman remained hope- can see the magician that we once with additional fees. The club had a month. The Belgian recorded his Hazard making regular appearanc- ful: “It’s not an easy time for the saw in the Premier League back in first goal and assist in La Liga in es off the bench. Though Hazard footballer. I’m sure it’s a matter of his prime. NCAA / Disrespectator Bracketology: Five Foolish Foolproof Tips to Help You Dominate Your March Madness Pool By KRISH GUPTA not even expected to make it past Three of the four teams in the submit one for each color. Sub- gos of all 68 teams in the NCAA the first round, made a Cinder- Final Four had red-hued colors. mit a bracket in which blue teams tournament, and for each match- As March Madness quickly ella run to the Final Four. But The blue teams dominated the always advance. Submit one in up, place two logos next to each approached, millions of Ameri- the person who got more fame tournament in 2018; all but two which red teams always advance. other in front of your friendly cans were frozen at their desks, and credit than any of the players of the remaining teams in the Submit one in which purple house pet (or steal a neigh- fingers trembling over their was the team chaplain, centenar- Elite Eight had blue as one of teams always advance. Needless bor’s pet if you don’t have one). trackpads as they constructed ian Sister Jean Dolores Schmidt. their primary colors. Blue and to say, at least one of these brack- Whichever logo your furry friend their brackets. Advanced com- The chaplain, then 98 years old, yellow teams found success in ets will do well. approaches first is the winner and puter simulations, Las Vegas reg- gained celebrity status as she sat moves on to the next round of ulars, geniuses, and everybody in in her wheelchair courtside for your bracket. between have tried to crack the each of Loyola’s games. While this strategy may be formula for the perfect March Obviously, the Ramblers’ run time intensive, there’s always a Madness bracket, and with it $1 was not due to the players but chance that you could discover million, but the feat still hasn’t rather their wise chaplain. Before the next Fiona the Hippo or Nick been accomplished. Luckily, the you fill your bracket, I advise you the Dolphin. wait is over as I have compiled, to find the chaplain at your local 4. Use ESPN’s randomizer. through hours of research, cor- church to guide you through your ESPN provides users with roboration, and evaluation, the decisions. You get bonus points the option to randomize their best tips for a 100 percent suc- if the chaplain is a woman who brackets. Simply click that op- cessful NCAA bracket (don’t try qualifies for AARP benefits. tion, and let all the matchups un- these at home). Without further 2. Choose a color to represent fold in front of your eyes. ado, here are five foolish ways to and stick with it. / The Spectator 5. Close your eyes and pray. craft the perfect bracket and wow Last March Madness, in 2019 Perhaps the most gutsy strat- all the members of your March (the 2020 tournament was can- egy, for each matchup, close your
Madness pool (Did I say foolish? celed due to the pandemic), the Afra Mahmud eyes and pick a team. The team I meant foolproof.). red-hued teams stole the show. you pick advances to the next 1. Seek out the chaplain at The final pitted the University 2017. 3. Let your dog choose. round. Keep going until you your local church. of Virginia Cavaliers, who have a Since ESPN allows bracket- Animals have been known reach your final champion to cut In the 2018 edition of March primarily orange scheme, against makers to submit up to 25 brack- to make excellent sports betting down the nets. Madness, the Loyola Ramblers, the Texas Tech Red Raiders. ets, a viable strategy would be to choices. Print and cut out the lo- The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Page 27 Sports NFL The Legacy of Drew Brees By PHILLIP PHAN a collapsed lung, and a severe foot in- Statistically, Brees has a case for appearances over the last 60 years. He Food Programme, which works with jury. He still performed as he always being one of the top quarterbacks of won New Orleans their first ever Su- the United Nations on feeding the Confetti fell as Drew Brees held has. The quarterback started in 12 all time (or even GOAT of the regular per Bowl and put out a Super Bowl hungry. He holds countless nonprofit his newborn son in one hand and the games, throwing 275 completions, 24 season). Brees is the only quarterback MVP performance for Saints fans to camps and organizations in New Lombardi trophy in the other. It was touchdowns, and six interceptions for to pass for over 80 thousand yards. remember. Orleans for the youth yearly. Brees’s 2010, his fourth year as a Saint, when 2,942 yards. Additionally, he led the He’s reached this number by leading Brees also makes a case for being commitment to the city of New Or- he brought home New Orleans’s first Saints to a 9-3 record as a starter. By the league in passing a record seven the greatest athlete off the field. Jour- leans isn’t a statistic that can be mea- Super Bowl trophy. Brees stood at no means was this record his best sea- times and passing for over 5,000 yards nalist Clay Travis describes it best: sured, but it reflects the type of player barely six feet tall, lacked athleticism, son, but it was still an elite year from for a record five times. For a while, he “No athlete has ever meant more to and person he is. and didn’t have the arm talent most a seasoned quarterback. He gave New was the all-time leader in touchdown the city in which he played than [...] Playing in the same era as all- other comparable quarterbacks had. Orleans all his body had to offer, but passes until Tom Brady passed him Brees has meant to New Orleans.” time greats such as Peyton Manning So how did he do what all the previ- the injuries caught up to him during this season. Brees has also racked up The quarterback took the helm of and Tom Brady, Brees was just as ous Saints quarterbacks failed to do? the playoffs. Brees struggled to throw 172 wins as a starter, which ranks him the Saints after Hurricane Katrina, elite. Brees was not highly recruited The answer is simple. Throughout his deep in the postseason and cited the fourth of all time among QBs. Brees which left New Orleans devastated. out of high school and was often career, Brees had incredible leader- injuries as the reason. The Saints fell has also notched 13 appearances in Brees led his community on the long overlooked, but he used these as his ship, perseverance, and attention to to the eventual Super Bowl champi- the Pro Bowl and two AP Offensive road back and gave them hope. He motivation. Most people would have detail that allowed him to carry his ons, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, in Player of the Year awards. donated millions of dollars and cre- decided being an NFL quarterback team to new heights. He overcame the divisional round, during which His individual accolades are quite ated the Brees Dream Foundation, was impossible at that point, but a career-threatening shoulder injury, Brees completed 19/24 passes for impressive, but it’s what he’s done for which aims to make healthcare more Brees thought differently. He con- during which his doctors told him he 134 yards, one touchdown, and three the franchise and city of New Or- accessible for people living in the city. trolled what he had control of and should quit football, to become one interceptions. It was his first game leans that separates him. After Brees Brees also spent thousands improv- did what he could to the best of his of the most productive quarterbacks with three interceptions since 2016. left the Chargers and signed a six-year ing parks in low-income neighbor- ability. What he lacked in athleticism, in NFL history. Brees realized that his body couldn’t deal with the Saints, he was tasked hoods in New Orleans. He recently his elite work ethic, attention to de- Brees reluctantly came back for hold up any longer, and he had a fam- with turning the franchise around, pledged another five million to build- tail, and leadership ability more than his 20th season last year. He was fac- ily waiting for him. That game would and he did just that. Brees led the ing more hospitals and facilities in the made up for. Despite being short in ing 11 broken ribs, a torn rotator cuff, be the last time Brees would wear the Saints to nine playoff appearances in area. Even outside of New Orleans, stature, Brees left a tall and undispu- black and gold. 15 years, when they had only had five Brees is an ambassador for the World table legacy in New Orleans. Soccer The Craziest Goalkeeper in Soccer History short retirement in 2005, he returned verse bicycle kick, also known as a often at all. Higuita played a high- the momentum of the game in 1992. continued from page 28 in 2007 for Venezuela club Guaros back hammer kick. He dived toward risk “sweeper-keeper” role, which he This rule established that goalkeepers FC. He joined Colombian second the ground and used his hands on the showcased by dribbling the ball out aren’t able to pick up the ball follow- for Spanish club Real Valladolid for division team Deportivo Rionegro in field to lunge his back heels forward of his box instead of punting it off. ing a backpass from their own team- one season before returning to play January 2008, and in July switched to and kick the ball. It surprised every- In his infamous 1990 World Cup mates. Higuita liked to play the game with Nacional for four more years. Deportivo Pereira before finally retir- one, and it was a unique move that loss against Cameroon, Higuita’s offensively and productively instead The Colombian was caught by ing in 2010. had never been done before. The dribbling miscalculation may have of sitting back and watching or us- the law in 1993 for acting as a con- Higuita is well known for his scorpion kick has now become an cost his team a crucial match, but his ing time-wasting tactics. While it may duit for cocaine baron Pablo Esco- creativity all over the field. He al- elite move and is very rare, even in style of play also helped develop the have looked a little crazy watching a bar in a kidnapping case involving ways experimented with the ball on professional soccer. game productively. Instead of sitting goalkeeper forget about his own net the daughter of his associate Carlos and off the pitch and is famous for The characteristic Higuita is most back, Higuita came forward and as- and dribbling players on the field, it Molina. He was paid $64 thousand inventing a move called the scorpion known for is his unique playing style. sisted his team with building up the was a step in the right direction. He for lending a helping hand in the kick. In a friendly match between In his time, goalkeepers were allowed play. This style may have seemed laid the foundation for the “sweeper- situation and sentenced to jail for England and Colombia on Septem- to pick up the ball with their hands foolish and impractical, but in reality, keeper” playstyle which has been seven months. The keeper missed ber 6, 1995, Higuita made a sublime following passes from their own it laid the foundation for the future. widely adopted by many of the best the upcoming 1994 World Cup due save that shocked the entire world. A teammates. This rule meant that goal- Higuita’s eccentric playstyle goalkeepers right now, such as Manu- to his conviction in the kidnapping simple long distance shot at Colom- keepers didn’t necessarily have to be played a huge role in inspiring FIFA el Neuer and Marc-André ter Stegen. case, and he could only watch on his bia’s net was a very simple catch for technically skilled and didn’t use their to change its rules. FIFA introduced Higuita will forever be remembered television as Colombia never made it the goalkeeper, but Higuita decided feet as much. Most keepers stayed in the back-pass rule as a means to dis- for leaving his mark on soccer as the out of the group stage. Following a to clear the ball by performing a re- the goal, not venturing forward very courage time-wasting tactics that kill craziest goalkeeper in history. Sports Editorial / Disrespectator A Masterclass on Heckling Referees By MAX SCHNEIDER in any sport in every situation. These achieved in multiple ways. The easi- into three parts: Identify, Remind, target of jokes surrounding his po- are often overused or boring, so it is est way is using a pun. For example, and Annoy. Identify is the simplest. tential bias. With that said, here is a All sports fans have been there. important that they are well crafted. checks are big hits in hockey and can It is easy to get the attention of a ref great long joke using our example The game is almost over. Your team A good stock joke should be short. also be used to pay off the ref. A whose name you’ve figured out. This referee. is about to get the winning score. All The referee isn’t going to be listen- player can steal a base, and an umpire strategy is especially effective for ref- The Ghost of Galarraga: the stars have aligned, and suddenly, ing for two minutes, and neither are can steal a game. It can also be done erees who aren’t notable and hence John Johnson is at a baseball you hear it. The whine of a whistle, your fellow fans. Stock jokes should by using a comparison. A ref could don’t hear their names as frequently. game being umpired by Joyce. He re- the scream of an umpire, or a yel- also be easy to understand. The ref- have robbed your team, like how a Remind is where your prepara- members Joyce’s no call and comes low flag on the field. Your excite- eree isn’t going to spend extra time thief stole the ref ’s eyes. Here are tion comes in. The best long jokes of- prepared. He brings a white sheet ment crumbles as the referee steals figuring out what you meant. They some of my favorite specific jokes: ten rely on bringing back something with arm and eye holes. He also all the glory with a bad call. You feel need to immediately understand and “If that pitch were any lower, it that happened in the past. Good brings a sign with Galarraga’s face on anger boiling deep inside you, and be subsequently ashamed. Lastly, would hit your IQ” (If the ump calls examples of references to the past it. When he gets to the game, he puts you feel the need to show the ref his they should be original. Going back a strike on a low pitch—baseball) are infamously blown calls, cheating on the sheet and holds up the sign. In own stupidity. You only know of one to the example I used earlier, every “I was in a car crash yesterday and scandals, or funny mishaps. Perhaps the second inning, he feels like Joyce way to express this anguish: heckling. ref has been asked to go to an eye had less contact than that.” (If the the most notable of these was when messed up a strike call. He knows Heckling may seem crude and insig- doctor millions of times. Similarly, referee misses an obvious foul, espe- Jim Joyce blew Armando Galarraga’s from his research that Joyce was the nificant, and when done improperly, don’t tell the ref about being blind, cially in basketball or soccer) perfect game bid by missing an obvi- umpire when Dallas Braden threw a it is. But when done by a true master sleeping, or biased. These remarks “Are you failing school because you ous call, when he called a runner safe perfect game. He then yells, “Jimmy, of the craft, it is something beautiful. have no impact, and using them only have missed two periods?” (When a on a play at first base in the ninth in- it’s okay, at least you have seen a per- Before I teach this class, we presents you as an amateur heckler line judge misses many calls through- ning. It is perhaps the most famous fect game.” He sees Joyce shake his should establish some ground rules. at best. However, if you make a joke out the game—hockey) miscall of the generation and can be head and gets a couple chuckles from First and foremost is understand- that implies these points, it is hilari- Lastly, let’s discuss the mother of used for many funny heckles. An- the crowd, who understands the ref- ing boundaries. A true heckler will ous. With that in mind, here are some all heckles, the long jokes. Long jokes other example is from a 2010 NFL erence. Later, he feels Joyce should never invoke a referee’s family or of my favorite stock jokes: are jokes that are repeated through- playoff game, during which an incor- have called a check swing. Feeling make fun of the referee’s appear- “Can I pet your seeing eye dog after out the game and when done correct- rect call led to the refs taking away angry, he yells, “Jimmy, it’s okay, at ance. Similarly, any sort of attack on the game?” ly, are by far the most effective. Long a touchdown that would have let the least you might get another attempt.” one’s race, gender, sexual orientation, “Did they stop printing the rulebook jokes need to start with the same Pittsburgh Steelers cover the spread. This one gets a hearty laugh as more or anything of the like is unaccept- in braille?” thing every time. This repetition This error cost people get the joke and appreciate it. able. Secondly, keep it clean. There “Do you take Visa or American Ex- catches the atten- bettors hun- In the ninth inning, Johnson feels like are usually children in the stands, and press?” tion of the referee dreds of Joyce has messed up again, putting it is important not to cross any lines. “Leave the gift giving to Santa!” and the fans. Your millions of his team’s win in jeopardy. He de- Remember, profanity is not as funny “If you had one more eye, you’d be opening should be dollars. This cides to go for the kill shot: “Jimmy, as you may think. It comes off as ob- a Cyclops” followed by a joke call is a heck- don’t worry, I have never been per- noxious and unfunny. Lastly, know Next, let’s examine specific jokes. that targets ler’s dream. fect either.” The fans roar in laughter when heckling is acceptable. Don’t Specific jokes are jokes that rely on something As some of as Joyce is humiliated by Johnson. go to a Little League game played by events that just happened. They need specific. If you master stu- He is a master heckler. your eight-year-old daughter and ask to be quick and witty, making them you keep dents may have Johnson is the perfect example a volunteer ref if he needs to see an the hardest jokes to come up with. it con- realized, calls of why heckling has purveyed in the eye doctor. Not only is it not cool to Similar to stock jokes, these need sistent, like this ex- sports world to this day. He was able criticize non-professionals, but it also to be short and original. However, you can ample are to safely outlet his anger, annoy the won’t earn your team any good calls they have the added necessity of per- slowly de- easy calls umpire, and make the game more in the future. taining to the sport being played. A grade the to heckle. enjoyable for other fans. I sincerely Now, let’s begin. Class is in ses- good specific joke has two elements: ref into de- served That ref- hope you can implement this aspect sion. Heckling comes in many forms. a detail and a punch line. The de- nothingness. These jokes thrive eree, Scott in your own sporting experiences, The first one we will explore is the tail is what just happened, and the on preparation. Researching Green, is and remember, with great power stock joke. These are jokes that work punchline links to it. This link can be jokes is simple and can be split now an easy comes great responsibility. Sophie Poget / The Spectator Page 28 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 THE SPECTATOR SPORTS NBA Brooklyn Blake: What It Means for the Rest of the NBA By TAEE CHI in a Bleacher Report AMA, Grif- bringing the 6’10” forward onto of age and injuries, the ex-high-fly- las Claxton, whom they selected fin replied, “My only goal is to help the roster as a small-ball center who er has evolved his game and catered with the 31st pick in the 2019 draft. Superteams are nothing new to win a championship […] That’s can make plays and spread the floor more to his shooting and playmak- Claxton has been a great defen- the NBA. The term, which general- why I came to Brooklyn.” Griffin’s for his teammates. “He used to be ing skills rather than his raw athleti- sive asset for the Nets as his 6’11”
ly refers to multiple All-Star caliber motive is understandable as despite / The Spectator a player who lived above the rim, cism. Griffin is 196-for-550 (35.6 frame and quick feet allow him to players teaming up, is a common his substantial playoff experience, and so he’s adapted and become a percent) on catch-and-shoot threes clamp down on perimeter defense. source of debate among NBA fans. he’s never actually made it past the guy [who] handles the ball since the 2016-2017 season, and Per 36 minutes, Claxton is averag- The current Brooklyn Nets team, conference semifinals, much less Mandy Li very well,” Nash said. “It’s he will be able to space the floor ing 20.9 points, 8.1 rebounds, 1.9 headlined by superstar trio Kevin competed in a finals series. Most of a tribute to the skill and in- for his teammates by camping out assists, 3.1 blocks, and 1.9 steals. Durant, Kyrie Irving, and James Griffin’s success in the league telligence that he has as a along the three-point line as a spot- Since the Nets already have solid Harden, can certainly be classified came from his nine-year basketball player.” up shooter. Griffin is also one of big men in Green and Claxton, as a superteam, and it stands out tenure with the Griffin’s versatility on the better passers at his position, Griffin’s role and playing time on as one of the most talented rosters Los Angeles Clip- the court has also been ranking 18th among forwards with the Nets may be diminished, and that has ever been assembled in the pers, where he praised by his former Clip- his 3.9 assists. Griffin, with his he might not have as substantial NBA. The recent addition of six- made five of per and now Nets teammate above average passing ability, will of an impact on the Nets as many time All-Star Blake Griffin makes his six all-star ap- DeAndre Jordan. “With a guy be able to initiate fast breaks, run Brooklyn fans are hoping for. Grif- the Nets even more dangerous. pearances, as well like [Griffin], man, when we put the occasional pick-and roll, and fin’s health condition is also a major Though the 32-year-old veteran as three All-NBA Sec- him in, we can go small, we can make plays out of the post. concern as in January, Griffin had might not be the explosive scor- ond Team honors. Though switch a lot of things Though the skillset and expe- his second knee surgery in a span ing machine he once was, he still the “Lob City” Clippers […] I love that we rience Griffin brings to the table of just eight months. Injuries have gives Brooklyn a versatile big man undeniably had talent and can have so many certainly have potential to improve plagued Griffin his entire career, who can nicely complement their grit, they always seemed to different lineups the Nets, two questions still leave and since 2014, he’s only played small-ball lineup and take some of fall short in the playoffs de- against teams, whether doubt in the minds of many. First- more than 70 games once. The the scoring burden off of Durant, spite multiple years of regu- they’re big, they’re ly, do the Nets really have space for Nets will need to carefully manage Irving, and Harden. lar season success. With only small, whatever it another big? Forward Jeff Green his playing time in order to prevent After agreeing to part ways with a couple of years left before is, I think we’re has been filling the role of a small any further injuries. the Detroit Pistons, Griffin signed retirement, Griffin hopes to fi- ready to be able to ball five, and the 34-year-old vet has Only time will tell the extent of a one-year, veteran-minimum con- nally win his long-awaited cham- ad- just,” Jordan said. been shooting the lights out recent- Griffin’s impact on the Nets. The tract deal with the Nets in March, pionship ring. Griffin was once known for ly (45.5 percent on catch-and-shoot bigger question is: will the Nets be worth $1,229,676. When asked Brooklyn Nets head coach his jaw-dropping alley-oops and threes, 47.4 percent on wide-open able to win Griffin his first champi- what his goals for the season were Steve Nash sees great benefits in dunks, but due to the combination threes). The Nets also have Nico- onship trophy? Soccer The Craziest Goalkeeper in Soccer History By SOHAM MUKHERJEE Cameroon striker Roger Milla scored choosing to pass or clear the ball, Hi- Born to a single mother in Me- est division of Colombian soccer, the opener of the match. Colombia guita attempted to dribble past Milla, dellín, Antioquia, Higuita lived his Categoría Primera A. The Colombian It was the 1990 World Cup, and needed to push forward quickly to get which was a fatal blunder as the Cam- early childhood in poverty. His moth- soon transferred to Atlético Nacional Colombia had thrived through the the equalizer. The stadium was vibrat- eroon striker stole the ball and easily er died when he was young, so his in 1986, where he would spend most group stages. The squad was set to ing with cheers from the Colombian walked it into the open net. Colombia grandmother took him in. He spent of his career and win multiple Co- face Cameroon in the Round of 16 supporters, motivating their team. ended up losing the match 2-1 after much of his time working a variety of lombian leagues and other trophies. at the Stadio San Paolo in Naples, The ball made its way backward to scoring a very late consolation goal. jobs, such as delivering newspapers, Higuita briefly left Nacional to play Italy. The match remained tense Colombian goalkeeper René Higuita, While Higuita may have seemed like to pay the bills. Higuita first began at 0-0 throughout the 90 minutes. who was well out of his box and un- a crazy goalkeeper, his impact on the playing soccer when he joined the continued on page 27 In the early minutes of extra time, der pressure from Milla. Instead of game would forever be remembered. Millonarios FC, a team in the high- NFL / Disrespectator Why Mitch Trubisky Is the Greatest Quarterback of All Time By YAQIN RAHMAN easy decision to give it to Trubisky. 5. He’s the best quarterback in terback Nick Foles, he would’ve The media and the football 2. Speaking of the NVP, he’s his draft class. felt bad absolutely decimating world like to portray Trubisky as The quarterback is one of the also been compared to Lincoln It’s ridiculous to think that the this team. So, with a 9-3 lead in an inconsistent quarterback who most revered positions in football. Loud of the Loud House. Chicago Bears should have select- the first half, he purposely let the was a bust and will forever be They are the ones calling the shots, Per Nickelodeon, football’s ed any other quarterback on the Eagles catch up. In the final, game- overshadowed by the two quarter- and their abilities can decide the most reputable source for infor- board besides Trubisky. Deshaun winning kick that would have won backs selected after him, Watson fates of their franchises. Through- mation and analytics, Trubisky has Watson has lost more games than the game for the Bears, the phe- and Mahomes. Even the Chicago out the history of the NFL, we’ve drawn comparisons to TV Show Trubisky and has a worse win-loss nomenon known as the “Double Bears were fooled by Trubisky’s seen some of the most talented Loud House’s main protagonist, record. As for Patrick Mahomes, Doink” occured, during which desire to lose intentionally, which passers to ever live, including the Lincoln Loud. Just like how Loud he lost a Super Bowl, which kicker Cody Parkey kicked the ball prompted them to send him off likes of Tom Brady, Joe Montana, learns from his 10 sisters in the Trubisky never did. It’s clear here and made it bounce off the up- as a free agent. The Buffalo Bills Peyton Manning, Brett Favre, Loud House, Trubisky similarly that the generational quarterback right before hitting the bar of the picked him up this offseason, un- Johnny Unitas, and Michael Vick, leads his 10 offensive teammates of the 2017 draft class is none goalpost below. This feat seemed aware that he will eventually take among many others. However, on the field. His leadership skills other than Trubisky. too ridiculous to be true, but it was Josh Allen’s starting quarterback none come close to the likes of and willingness to learn are un- 6. He made NFL history. undeniably the doing of Trubisky, job and lead the Bills to their long this generation’s greatest quarter- paralleled by any football player I can’t justifiably write this who used the wind generated by awaited Super Bowl victory. Or back, Mitch Trubisky. So without of this era. You don’t see just any- article and leave out one of the the motion of his heavenly quar- maybe he won’t, continuing his further ado, here’s why Trubisky one being compared to the great best games that Trubisky ever terback arm to create an angle by quest to satiate his desire to main- is the greatest quarterback of all Loud. These intangible qualities had. In a 2019 game against the which the ball had no chance to go tain the fun of football. But what- time and why his recent signing are what separate a good player Dallas Cowboys, he made history through the uprights, even if it hit ever the case, it is clear that he’s with the Bills will lead them to from a great one, and his ability when he became the first quarter- the goalpost the first time. unmistakably the best quarterback many Super Bowls (and maybe to rally the team to victory is truly back to complete 70 percent or to ever exist. even world domination) in the fu- unmatched. more of his passes, rush for 50 ture. 3. He never threw a pick six. or more yards, throw for three or 1. He won the NVP, which no Trubisky is the only quarter- more touchdowns, and rush for a other quarterback has ever won. back to have started more than 50 touchdown all in the same game. This point is the most obvi- NFL games and never thrown an And no, no quarterback has ever SPORTSBEAT ous reason for why Trubisky is interception that led to a touch- achieved this exact series of events the greatest quarterback of all down. This fact shows how dedi- before. Impressed yet? The NBA trade deadline passed, with all-star Nikola Vucevic being time. He’s the only player to ever cated he is at his craft, making sure 7. All of his losses were flukes. traded to the Chicago Bulls and center Andre Drummond going to win the prestigious Nickelodeon he never makes big mistakes that You may be wondering how, the Los Angeles Lakers. Valuable Player award, given to the could cost him the game and give despite the fact that he’s so domi- best player to ever exist in football points to the other team. His will- nant, he looks very inconsistent history. In the game that he won ingness to make sure everything on the field. It is quite apparent The NFL announced that they will be adding an extra game to the this award, he went up against the is perfect is what separates him why this happens: he loses on schedule this year, straying from the traditional 16 games. second seed New Orleans Saints. from every other quarterback in purpose. That’s right. He actually He could’ve won the game with the NFL. loses games when he feels bad for ease. However, he felt bad for 4. He never lost a Super Bowl. the other team. It’s obvious if you Francis Ngannou KO’d Stipe Miocic to claim the UFC heavyweight Saints quarterback Drew Brees, One defining aspect of his tal- think about it. He is so incredibly title. who was playing his last season in ent that separates him from the good at football that he wants to the NFL after a 20-year career and rest of the quarterbacks is that he’s give the other teams a chance to The eleventh seed UCLA reached the Final Four in the NCAA men’s didn’t want to be the one to ruin never lost the big game. Quarter- win. This motivation can be seen basketball tournament, along with first seeds Gonzaga and Baylor and his playoff run. Thus, he purpose- backs who are assumed to be bet- with the game against the Phila- second seed Houston. In the women’s bracket, first seedsUConn , fully threw the game so that Brees ter than Trubisky, such as Brady delphia Eagles in the 2018-2019 Stanford, and South Carolina made the Final Four, as well as third could win. However, at the Nick- or Manning, have all lost a Super playoffs. Knowing that he’s facing seed Arizona elodeon booth, where they decide Bowl sometime in their career. an Eagles team that barely made it the winner of the NVP, it was an Amateurs. to the playoffs with backup quar- The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Page 29 Disrespectator
How Did the Chicken Cross the Road? By KRISTA PROTEASA “Neil, you knew this would to be nothing but a chirpy lit- like you’re just a dirty cheat with someone who hates the happen,” the road said to the tle liar.” who only cares about yourself. one person they swore to love Our age-old riddle is not chicken. Stan the road started on You make me sick, Neil. I don’t more than anything? Peculiar, one to be taken lightly. Asking “No, Stan. You went snoop- his route to Marlene. even have a digestive system, isn’t it? someone, “Why did the chick- ing in my DMs without my per- “Stan! Wait! It wasn’t what but you make me want to Well, there you have it, en cross the road?” opens up mission. If it were up to me, you thought it was.” throw up. I thought you were folks. It didn’t take much for the possibility for too many I would be in Florida by now,” “Oh, really? Then one of the good guys. Turns the chicken to cross the road, things to go wrong. This is not the chicken countered. please, by all means, out you’re a featherbrain but boy, did he go above and a risk you want to take. Both “You did this to yourself explain to me what just like all the rest. Pack beyond. I wonder where Neil the chicken and the road have and you know it. How could exactly you think your things and go, Neil. is now. Maybe he’s befriend- gotten into too many argu- you say you love Marlene and it was. Because It’s all over.” ed another boulevard zebra ments because of this seem- then talk to Shalissa right from where Oh man, crossing or maybe he’s simply ingly innocent joke. At any behind her back? This is in- I’m that took a turned to not crossing anyone, rate, today I hope to be able explicable, Neil. If you don’t stand- turn, didn’t it? road or not. That’d be the to answer the lesser-known tell her, I will.” ing, Anyway, you smarter option. I hope you variant of this question: “How “NO! Stan, you wouldn’t. I guessed it. Stan appreciate having learned the did the chicken cross the wasn’t going to do anything. I made his way through answer to life’s most burning road?” There are probably was just in such a bad head- the intersections question. Join me next time trillions of people out there space. I just needed a break of New York City on “Krista Answers Questions who can tell you why, but I from Marlene. You’re mar- to Marlene’s high- You Didn’t Ask”! Good morning bet you one whole cookie that ried, right? You know how it rise apartment, and, and good night, America. no one can tell you how. Whilst is.” yes, she and Neil prompt- I was waiting for the light to “I actually don’t, Neil. Un- ly got divorced. Neil permit me across the street, like some people, I value my and Stan also grew I encountered both the chick- wife. Weren’t you the one who apart because (mo+ k=l) : en and the road. Things looked asked her to marry you? Well, how could you like they were getting heated. here you are, proving yourself it looks stay friends Sabrina Chen / The Spectator
Minimum Satisfaction Transforms Weight-Loss Methodology
By SANJANA YASNA consume, and cause a variety they can get Omega-3 poi- Baguette (MSBag) is served to encourage more custom- of other disastrous effects. soning, which entails severe two weeks stale to force ers to follow suit. Romantic The recent rise in popu- The important revelation is diarrhea and vomiting, per- Americans to expend calories pairs and old married couples larity of “Minimum Satisfac- that these effects go hand- fect for expelling excessive by chewing profusely. The often have Minimum Satis- tion” pastries has sparked a in-hand with losing weight. amounts of consumed food. wheat flour in the baguette is faction takeout together to revolution in cuisine across The Minimum Satisfac- There have also been a gluten-free, and sour milk is serve as a bonding activity the nation. For the first time tion Bagel (MSB) is the most number of spin-off yeast- used in place of baking soda. involving patting each oth- in history, multiple long- popular menu selection of related foods branching And last and least, there are er’s backs and cleaning the standing generational pastry “Minimum Satisfaction” con- from the MSB, such as the Minimum Satisfaction Eng- other’s vomit. School pranks recipes have been daringly fectionaries. MSB dough nor- Minimum Satisfaction Do- lish Muffins that have long are done by replacing a part changed over the course of mally consists of cardboard nut, which is made with a qualified for the Minimum of lunch with a Minimum Sat- only a few months. The ingre- and cornstarch mixed with combination of corn starch, Satisfaction tagline with no isfaction food item, though dients in these pastries are vegemite spread. Different drywall, and used bathroom recipe tweaks. often to no avail, as students carefully picked with con- regions use unique additions. sponge. The sponges are do- Minimum Satisfaction typically don’t notice the dif- sideration for common quar- New York arguably has the nated from wealthy house- goods forcibly make one ex- ference. Minimum Satisfac- antine nutritional needs. As most flavorful MSBs because holds, meaning they are dap- pel consumed foods, but they tion pastries weren’t intend- a result, Americans writhe chefs source their water not pled with quality extravagant nonetheless have garnered a ed for the faint of heart, from the pain of eating these from taps but directly from soaps rich with the essential huge fanbase eager to trans- but the overt support has wise ingredients that scrape the Hudson River. In Califor- vitamins A, D, and E. The do- form their bodies. Restau- expanded their popularity as the sugar and fat off their nia and Iowa, hens are inject- nut does have frosting, but rants often take photos of the main pop culture weight lard-strewn tongues. “Writh- ed with vitamin supplements, it’s normally stuffed inside overweight but motivated loss method. Of course, it is ing” isn’t an understate- so the eggs used in the mak- to encourage first-timers to customers every time they a double-edged sword; it has ment—the pastries kill one’s ing of bagels are rich in Ome- bite it instead of chickening visit to record the visible driven many gyms and organic appetite, induce vomiting, ga-3 fatty acids essential for out. changes and hang them on grocery stores out of busi- force calorie expenditure to heart health. If one is lucky, The Minimum Satisfaction the walls as success stories ness.
Stuyvesant, Sometime in the Distant Future By ESHAAL UBAID est meme about the iPhone over HOLOGRAM CALL? I way into a classroom made my scanner, when suddenly... 47 Max and, of course, the can’t believe him!” heart ache for the good old “ALERT! LARRY THE Reporting to the nation- juicy teenage gossip. Ah, to be a young person days. Just as I began to miss LOGARITHMS LORD HAS ally renowned Stuyvesant “Ughhh, I can’t go to cy- again! I couldn’t help but tear my childhood, from the days ENTERED NEW YORK WITH High School for an interview borg war training today, mom up at the nostalgia of the of TikTok and extreme glob- HIS ARMY OF CYBORGS!” should have been an intimi- says I need to install my new endless locker hallways and al turmoil during the Great Students collectively dating, abnormal experience. software update,” a disgrun- hologram statues of various Existential Crisis of 2020, dropped their backpacks I had heard about the excel- I felt my feet lift off the and pulled out maple syrup lent students, the daunting ground. bottles from their lockers. I hallways, and the severe lack An announcement echoed myself had one handy in the of social activity. However, throughout the premises event of an emergency be- I would have a difficult time amidst tired groans. “Ran- cause golly do these things proving that my visit was any- dom gravity change drill! You clog up cyborg mechanisms. thing more than ordinary. never know when those phys- Larry had been threaten- The chattering of ics-altering warheads will hit, ing the city for months now. stressed adolescents kids!” It was about time that he drowned out the whirring hov- And with that, we were showed up. ercrafts in the atmosphere. now walking on a new floor, As a cyborg army began I stepped into the standard which had just previously throwing rock-hard powdered transportation catapult, and been the wall. The custodial donuts at the school windows as I flew through the air at bots chirped in frustration and the gravity was disabled, top speed through the main at having to clean footprints math team students protest- entrance, I began to wonder off of them once the gravity ed. “YOU’RE NOT A TRUE if this place really was so reset. They could have made MATHEMATICIAN! LOGS unusual. Before looking for the floor a lava obstacle ARE TO BE USED PURELY my scheduled interviewer’s Ismath Maksura / The Spectator course like literally any oth- FOR EDUCATIONAL PUR- room, I decided to explore er school, but no. Whatever POSES!” By then, everyone the school. I especially loved works for cyborg war prep, I was attacking cyborgs left the cute little old-fashioned guess. and right, plunging the school laser security beams scat- In the maze of hallways into a sticky, syrupy mess. tered around, not to mention and A.I. charging stations, it As such, I rest my case. how fun it was to dodge them took a considerable amount Stuyvesant High School is (by the way, the kid whose of time to realize that I completely ordinary, with pinky finger got sliced off had taken a wrong turn at students well-prepped for by those things earlier, you the catapult entrance. One practical situations and fond really need to work on your short-range teleportation memories that will last a life- reflexes). Nothing else was device later, I was finally in time. out of the ordinary, however. tled AI student ranted. “It’s prominent historical figures front of the correct door for It was your usual laser beam so stupid, I can just remind (the Kool-Aid Man one is my an interview with the profes- ❓❓ 數 fight mischief in the hallways myself tomorrow.” personal favorite). Watching sor of digital communications. (col+ +e) ( -at) with people quoting the lat- “Craig broke up with you a student fingerprint scan his I reached for the fingerprint Page 30 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Disrespectator
To All the Objects We Left In Our Lockers
By THE EDITORIAL BOARD
Once schools closed, we reminisced about the beloved objects that we tragically left in our lockers. Through a collection of love letters, we hope to rekindle the strong and blazing passion that was once there.
Dear Faithful Glove, Dearest Locker Photo of Teacher, Dear Confiscated AirPods, How I miss thee. The sensation of I miss the sight of the shiny gleam on your bald head. You must I am reminded of you every second your fuzzy fringes upon my clammy feel lonely taped deep within the crevices of my locker. Remember of the day, from the moment I wake up palm is one I will remember for all of how shy I was when I first taped you there? Every time a group in the morning to my afternoon strolls, eternity. I miss the gaping hole be- of people walked by my locker, I would hastily close it because I long baths, and bedtime. Before I lost tween the third and fourth fingers and was ashamed to be seen stroking that hairless patch of skin. Now, you, you used to fill me up with music the way I could feel the cool breeze withering away in quarantine, I regret my shame. If I could go every morning. Mr. Moran would be jeal- pass between the ridge while the rest back to the past, I would openly proclaim my love for you. I would ous every time I walked the halls with of my hands remained toasty within yank open my locker, rip you from my walls, and thrust you into the you, but I didn’t care. I loved your two your depths. Do you remember how light, holding you up for the world to see. It is time for the world little pods and how they fit perfectly you got that hole? It was during that to see that nothing, not even the authorities, can prevent us from in your sleek case while everyone else’s one chemistry lab, when I insisted that being together! Though I still see you from my laptop screen, it horrendous strings watched in jealousy. your fabric would shield me from the could never replace the true sight of you lecturing in front of the We overcame obstacles together. My harms of hydrochloric acid despite my classroom. Until then, I have already pinned another picture of heart broke when the bitter Mr. Moran teacher’s urgent warnings. Ahh… how you on my bedroom walls. But it’s not the same. I eagerly await our took you away the first time from me and very wrong we were. My scars from reunion so that I may once again stroke the smooth skin of your locked you up in a cage. The long distance that fateful day will forever remind balding head. Our love is as boundless as the condition eating away was truly a traumatic experience, but me of our unbreakable bond, my spe- at your hairline! when we reunited and I locked your pods cial mitten. into mine, I once again was filled with your beautiful music. But alas, we are separated once again. I miss you. Very much. I am sorry that I left you, but I will always imagine you by my side, our My most beloved Lab Apron and Goggles, Oh Cookie, My Cookies, bodies entangled as one and your music Where are you meant to be if not on me? I must remind you that our relationship is forbidden. igniting fireworks. I need you, helping me and protecting me as I As I stole you away from that horrid chrome tin––a prin- click through the virtual labs and as I break cess from an ivory tower––I teemed with malicious intent. down over not being able to light an online The risk of getting caught was always evaded, but I was bunsen burner for the 20th time. You shielded constantly electrified by the threat of a rebuke that nev- me from anything that would trespass my per- er arrived. Though you might be stale and unsavory from Oh Sandwich, sonal space. Goggles, remember when I said I your unmoving journey, I lust for you all the same. I desire Nothing nourishes me. I roam the didn’t need you? I lied. I miss you and those that brief trip from lap to mouth, ferried by my unsatis- streets, silent and starving. I think of blush pink circles you would leave around my fied hands, and that final, crisp snap as I take a bite, the the cruel revolution of the Earth around eyes and forehead, exposing the things we’ve unquestionable climax of that overwrought moment. I’m the Sun, all the time that has gone by done together. How will I pass chemistry with- afraid the only resolution for you, my lost love, is in the while you stay locked inside those metal out you, and what will happen to the chemistry shower of crumbs that topples from the folds of my shirt doors… And I wander west in my dreams between us? to the smooth linoleum floor. sometimes, and I mingle with soldiers and sailors and catch constellations, and yet I want nothing more than you out of that locker and your decaying layers clothed inside a Terry’s special, so close that I swallow you whole, with all the maggots Dearest Low-Fat Milk, and termites and beautiful monsters in- Our love is now cheese—left alone for a while to fer- side you. ment, only to be taken over by bacteria as our tenderness grows thick and curdled. Yet always, cheese ages like a fine wine when left alone; it becomes hard and firm with a touch of tart, and it is ever so delicious. I know I said we had to take a break, but I had no idea Dearest Gym Clothes, that would be our last meeting. I didn’t want to break up Ah, my most stylish outfit. I wish to forever… I just thought we needed some space. But with feel your damp fibers rub on my bare skin this space, I realized something. I found myself dreaming once more. I long to mingle with you again, about you and how liquidy, how refreshing, and how satu- Courtesy of Karen Zhang but alas, we have been separated for a year rated with calcium you were every night. I realized that… and counting. I miss your scent––a unique that I loved you and that I absolutely cannot let you go. I and fragrant combination of body odor and need you back in my life, Low-Fat Milk. I hope you feel the sweat. I just desire to be with you, square same. So I write this letter to you in hopes that our love dancing while your nylon fibers dance on my has aged like a fine gruyère, ready to be melted down by thighs and your cotton rubs my back. the heat of the fire inside us, burning for each other and made into macaroni and cheese.
My Dear Pen, I made a promise to you and to myself that I’d return you after that one chemistry test. Yet days passed, and I never let you go home. I used you as a harlot, employing you for my notes during first period and pimping you to a neighbor during second. I never even thanked you for it. You opined to return to the satchel from whence you came, but I never listened. I managed to look my friend in the eye, knowing I used you who was theirs. Then, I cast you away without a second thought into the black crevices of my locker, of which we will not speak. You became a never-ending reminder of my failure to live up to the person I want to be. I write this not for forgiveness, as I expect none, but for closure and for the declaration that I might do the right thing.
Hey Idiots, Guess Who Got Into a College. That’s Right, Me.
By CHRISABELLA JAVIER esteem issues” and needed to an article about it. After, of HUMOROUS ARTICLE. This, “go see a psychologist, I am course, this article. Because as well as anything else I write What’s up, NERDS? begging you.” Yeah. All of you. I did get into a college. I got under the Spectator Humor Yeah, I’m talking to you. I got into a COLLEGE. the acceptance letter and ev- department, is meant to be You, the person who flexed Yeah, I did. erything. I paid the admission comedic and does not neces- the 99 you got in the class Hold the applause, I know. fee. I clicked on the little sarily reflect my opinions or with a 98 average while I Yes, after finishing all the blue button that said “AC- those of any other Stuyves- was mulling over my 65. You, apps in one day, doing the CEPTED.” I got the big letter ant Spectator writers.) the person who looked at me bare minimum on the Common in the mail. It had stickers weirdly when I came to class Application, and writing sup- and everything. (Please don’t rescind me.) 40 minutes late with a frap- plements channeling the lyri- Don’t believe me? puccino. You, the teacher cal genius of “Family Reunion” I’ve got a picture of the who emailed me back about by blink-182, I got into, get letter. BOOM. Congratulations! You’ve a rec saying, “Please go away. this, a COLLEGE. That’s what I thought, reached the end of the I don’t like you.” (Well, you That’s right. Personally, I nerd. hunt. Piece together the didn’t say it like that, but I think what got me in was my (In all seriousness though, link and type it in for a know what you meant, jerk.) personality. Specifically, my if any admissions officers ~special~ surprise. You, the guidance counselor humility. I’m incredibly hum- from Emory University see who said I had “major self- ble. I’m so humble I’ll write this, this is a JOKE. This is a Courtesy of Chrisabella Javier The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Page 31 Disrespectator
Sample Letter of Continued Interest to Get You off the Harvard Waitlist
By EMILY CHEN To start, I’d like to men- than half of my classes The Spectator lecture someone, which I’m tion that I have improved National Merit Award for Have not checked Na- sure many of them miss. It’s Dear Ivy League, my SAT score to a 1590 and playing the college admissions viance in two weeks! the thought that counts! that that was not only the re- game Notice the bullet points? If offered admission to I would like to start off sult of pure intellect but also First place in national Red- I’m so respectful of your any one of the eight of you, I by saying thank you so much the hard work and dedication Bull chugging competition time that I’ve limited myself will automatically accept the for a spot on your waitlist for from scouring the College to the amount of space given invitation and matriculate to literally all eight of you—it’s Board website for schools in for some of your supplements your class of 2025. By some almost like you guys copy- red states that have no COV- because I know you guys don’t miracle, if more than one of and-pasted your responses ID lockdown procedures. De- like reading—if you did, you you has become literate in the and changed the name of spite all of you going test-op- would have already admitted last three months and accept your schools, so I’m going to tional this year, we both know me, but, alas, I must appeal to me, don’t worry! I’ll just save do the same thing! Props to that numbers mean a great my audience. that acceptance letter for Brown, however, for being deal in validating your worth. Finally, I have remained graduate school, and if there extra quirky and misspelling I mean, why else is the one Sophia Li / The Spectator as the most positive member are more than two of you I’ll my name as “Unfortunately.” with the highest acceptance of my community, even after just save the third one for law It is truly an honor to be rate the one you all laugh at? dropping all responsibilities school. Or med school. Or for considered for the privilege No offense CornL, I adore as a second-term senior. (I’m whatever else comes after of giving you money that I you just the same. Further- totally being vulnerable and undergrad because I’m simply don’t have. It reminds me of more, I have risked my health admitting my faults right now. delaying being an adult mem- that time some of you were just for this, and if I get sick, As you can see, I’m quite self- ber of society. And if none of bamboozled by students with I will simply sue the College aware and sophisticated.) In you accept me, well, my next awards for sports that they Board and use that money to Zoom classes, I am always letter to your admissions of- don’t play, but that’s be- buy you a new library. That raising my blue hand and am fice may not be as nice. side the point. Anyway, as I would help, right? the first one to unmute myself await a second judgment day, Some of my other achieve- Briefly ran for NYC mayor in breakout rooms. Yes, it may XOXO, I’d like to update you on all ments include: (and generously decided to be because I was sleeping on Yet Another Stuy Kid the awards I have received, Not referring to the pan- give my large fanbase to the my laptop keyboard and acci- among other things I have ac- demic as panoramic, parallelo- #yanggang because I don’t dentally clicked the buttons, complished, within the mere gram, Panda Express, etc. know the other candidates) but this provides comedic re- three months since submit- Maintaining a 97.5 semes- Published an article in a lief in these trying times and ting my application. ter GPA after CR-ing less well-respected newspaper, gives teachers an excuse to The Curse of Creative E-mails From a College By HELENA WILLIAMS Sincerely, location? Or our one some- Bobert Robert what-famous alum, who is a Block July 2020 master of modern interpre- By ERICA CHEN fectly fine though they were Dear Prospective Stu- September 2020 tive dance? The residential a lot more annoyed than usual, dent, To My Loveliest Prospec- hall we’re renovating that As COVID-19 continues which was to be expected giv- Greetings! My name is tive Student, won’t be ready until af- to wreak havoc in our world, en what was happening in the Bobert Robert, and I’m your How are you doing? ter you graduate? Because something bigger has struck school, but what could they personal admissions officer Are you enjoying the fall, that’s all waiting right here Stuyvesant High School. Cre- do about it? Nothing. All they ative block. could do was look at their list at the University of Insti- sweetie? I’m just writing through your EFSSMSA Think of that as a mix of of assignments and find that tute Saint McHarverd. I’ll to tell you that I still don’t application! You don’t even writer’s block, artist’s block, no one had submitted anything be in touch with you over have your application! Now, need to submit essays to ap- and whatever other block worth grading. Some did sub- the next few months mak- I know that it’s Septem- ply as an EFSSMSA student might exist (even cobbler’s mit an empty doc with an im- ing sure you can figure out ber, and literally nobody has anymore, and if you do send block, which is a nasty one). age of a loading screen, hoping how to apply through, you their applications in yet, but in essays, we definitely won’t Ever had those days when you that the teachers would be guessed it, the Common App! I’m really hoping to see you not read them entirely! Don’t can’t do anything productive, too lazy to wait for it to load Hope to hear from you soon! as an applicant to the Uni- forget to apply now to be in- can’t make even a sentence’s and just give an easy A+. Just And you can bet your bottom versity of Institute Saint cluded in our priority review! headway into an English es- like what people did on Tik- dollar that I’ll be sending an- McHarverd. (Just in case Sincerely, say, and lack the energy to Tok. But our instructors knew noying information your way you forgot, U.S. News rated Bobert Robert talk to your friends? Feel- these tricks. After all, they before long! us #37!) ing like you suddenly want to also scroll through TikTok for Sincerely, Your EFSSMSA status December 2020 scream bloody murder and countless hours instead of Bobert Robert awaits! To My Applicant-I-Re- listen to horror stories late grading past assignments, or at night instead of being pro- whatever else teachers do. Sincerely, quire-Because-Small-Liber- ductive? Those are the early None of the faculty P.S. I got your information Bobert Robert al-Arts-Colleges-Are-Suf- symptoms of creative block— seemed to understand what from the College Board by fering-During-Coronavirus, among many others. While the was going on. Principal Yu con- paying them a few bucks for October 2020 Hiya! Forgot about me? school was still busy prepar- tinued to send his uplifting “people who got above 1000 To My Most Delightful I sure hope not! (Especially ing for blended learning, this emails every morning, which on the SAT superscored.” Prospective Tuition-Payer, since there are now over new problem threw them off no longer proved so motiva- Good luck unsubscribing! How great it is to say 300 unread e-mails from our balance. Well… more than just tional. The counselors hur- hello! You still haven’t read school sitting in your inbox! off-balance. It completely riedly organized get-together August 2020 any of my e-mails, clicked on I know because I’ve been flipped them into the air and meetings with their respec- To My Dearest Prospec- any of their links, or submit- tracking them all!) I’d just launched them face-first into tive homerooms, but when the tive Student, ted your EFSSMSA applica- like to let you know that my a humongous pile of mud. meetings came around, no one Hey, kitten. How are you tion! You haven’t even made EFSSMSA offer still stands. Meanwhile, The Spectator turned on their cameras or doing? Are you enjoying the an account on our applica- In fact, just for you, I’ll was dealing with more issues. unmuted themselves. No one Can you imagine writing when even bothered to make up summer? I’m just writing to tion platform! That’s gotta knock off the GPA require- you’ve been struck with a case excuses as to how their mics tell you how much I think be a glitch, right? After ment! All you need to apply of creative block? Nope, not didn’t work, or that their cam- you’d be a great fit for the all, I have a feeling you’d is to click on your applica- happening. Even harder than era broke, like they normally University of Institute Saint do slightly above average at tion down below and send us trying to get a thread through do in class. McHarverd. I’ve attached the University of Institute your name! We’ll even give the hole on the head of the Why was this virus so photos of our campus, which Saint McHarverd. So what you $1,000 in grants if you needle at night without any picky, targeting only us poor will allow you to see that are you waiting for? After just submit before EDII! light source. At least the hole students? Now we’re stuck we do, in fact, have grassy all, we’re so eager to have Just send in your application is still there. But how do you lamenting our terrible fate, quads. But ours are unique you apply that we’ll waive our right away! Like now! Please! expect people to write with- going to school, and passively because U.S. News rated us SAT requirements, just for Sincerely, out inspiration? You can’t! listening to our teachers ram- #37 on their list of colleg- you! Bobert Robert So the writers each de- ble on and on about this and es that exist near “Random Sincerely, cided to write random gibber- that. I bet we would all much Small Towns in South Con- Bobert Robert January 2020 ish, and when the latest issue rather lay in bed and sleep. nectichusetts!” Wow, what To You, My Precious Love- was released, it left the rest And eat. And repeat. No need of the students, as well as the for thinking. a great and shining accolade November 2020 ly Prospective Applicant, faculty, utterly confused as If there was one upside of our success! To My Favorite Person to Hey! Apply yet? Did you to what code the paper was to this horrendous event, it Also, because I’m soooo E-mail, apply? Want money? I can writing in. Perhaps it was a was that for the first time eager to read your essays, Hello there! Since I last give you money! TEN THOU- conspiracy happening between in memory, or perhaps in his- I’ve marked you as an Excel- e-mailed you, you’ve received SAND! ONE HUNDRED all of the Spec writers that no tory, Talos managed to stay lence Frontier Shining Star 85 e-mails from other people THOUSAND! Just apply al- one else was aware of. They’ve online for more than an hour Majestic Scholarly Aca- at the University of Insti- ready! Literally just click on insisted it’s some sort of so- at a time due to the lack of demic student! With your tute Saint McHarverd, who the link below, and your ap- cial commentary—but they’re student activity. EFSSMSA application, you’ll were definitely not all me in plication will automatically probably just covering their be exempt from the actual disguise. And you still never be submitted! asses. fee we charge students to clicked on any of them! If I Pleasepleaseplease- It seemed that the stu- apply to our school because weren’t so smart, I’d think pleaseplease! dents were the only ones we aren’t rich enough al- you were avoiding me! Do I who were under this curse. ❌ a . ready. need to remind you of our continued on page 32 The teachers were all per- You will apply, right? U.S. News award-winning Page 32 The Spectator ● April 6, 2021 Disrespectator
The Spectator’s First Annual Hunger Games
By THE EDITORIAL partment had hoped, and they never “punching down,” they cheating. base area. As they built, Lay- BOARD were unable to enact much refused to commit any di- out tried to put on Phoebe tangible change. Once the rect acts of violence on oth- Business Bridgers’s sophomore solo Welcome to The Stuyves- Hunger Games began, Opin- er departments. The other The Business Department effort “Punisher” to pass the ant Spectator’s First Annual ions was the first to go. For tributes, offended by their was the only one willing to time but found themselves Hunger Games! Fed up with reasons still unknown to this implied “down” nature, didn’t kill, even when unprovoked. somewhat underwhelmed by the free press, we here at day, every single department extend the same gratitude to Empowered by the violent the album. Highly offended the Capitol stuck all 13 Spec- decided to gang up on them Humor and attacked with full will of the free market, com- and appalled by the Layout’s tator departments into a big from the jump. It turned out force. After Humor attempt- pelled by the invisible hand judgment, A&E bludgeoned arena together and told them the greatest weapon isn’t ed to recite a long-winded of supply and demand, and the department to death with to fight to the death. With words after all––a big rock is and rambling joke that didn’t sponsored by Arby’s ©, slayer a hammer. only one department permit- slightly better. go anywhere, the Capitol po- of men Jared Moser brought ted to leave the arena alive, lice swooped in to put viewers the games to a vicious end. Photo the situation devolved quick- Science at home out of their misery, Despite being utterly insuf- The Photography Depart- ly. Here is how the Games The Science Department killing Humor with a few well- ferable and unable to shut ment was physically quite played out: spent much time studying the planned roasts (and bullets). up about “stonks,” they used prepared, thanks to hours of anatomy of local trees and their brilliant business acu- carrying heavy camera equip- News discovered that the trees Sports men to maneuver the complex ment that made them look were made of wood. Despite One would think the odds alliances and unmarketability like Noah Beck. Using their Under the watchful eye the breakthrough, they did would be in the Sports De- of the child murder circle. immense upper arm strength, of President Yu, the News not contribute significantly partment’s favor. The Cross- Their greatest enemy and ally they scaled the nearest tree Department diligently re- to the Games, though they fit champion had been train- was Opinions—they had just to spy on enemies and poten- ported on the ins and outs were at a natural advantage ing for this their whole life. read “Das Kapital” and “At- tial targets. However, as fate of The Spectator’s First An- in the wilderness, being ac- They leeched off of Layout’s las Shrugged” and would shut would have it, their weak legs nual Hunger Games. News en- quainted with the local flora superb navigating skills to up about neither. They cut a failed them, and they plum- forced rigorous journalistic and fauna. They had the slo- find the best hiding spots. swathe through the compe- meted toward the ground. ethics and sourcing practices gan “WE ARE FUNGHIS,” but And, in true Sports competi- tition with their official Ar- Luckily, they were not spot- as they profiled the soon-to- nobody understood it. Sci- tive fashion, they got to said by’s© chainsaw, McDonald’s© ted and began their search be-dead teenagers and made ence had good food supplies, spots first and scared every- grenade launcher, and Taco for animals, not to consume, sure to use ambiguous words which they kept in a deep one else anyway with their Bell© quesalupa. Long before but to pose and decorate for like “said” when referring to cave. They also attempted biceps. They weren’t scared the head of the Sports De- portraits. After stopping to direct quotes. However, by to build weapons and other of the others’ swords or bows partment went tumbling to photograph a unique, abso- the time their articles about hunting contraptions, but and arrows. How could they the ground, it was already lutely breathtaking sunset, the contestants were finally that effort was where they be when their six-packs were clear who would win. Art stabbed Photo from be- printed four weeks later, went awry. An attempt at a impenetrable? However, while hind. Fortunately, Photo was most of the players had al- catapult backfired and killed they weren’t all muscle and no Copy able to grab their camera ready perished. them with one swift pebble to brains, their intellect (or lack The Copy Department, strap and strangle Art be- the skull. thereof) was just no match calling themself the “copy- fore they got away, stopping Features for the Hannibal Lecter-like cat,” immediately sought only to take a photo because The Features Depart- Arts and Entertainment mastermind of Business, who, to find a mascot. After un- Art looked “cute.” ment was annihilated early in The Arts and Entertain- after killing Sports with their successfully trying to tame the Games by way of arrow ment (A&E) Department was grenade launcher, ate their a wild cat, they appointed Art wounds. At the time of their no doubt the underdog going liver with some fava beans. themself the protocol en- The Art Department death, Features had been into The Spectator’s First They left the head, though. forcer and traveled around, loved watching the Hunger singing loudly on the top of Annual Hunger Games, and irking everyone with snide re- Games and created fanart of a large, conspicuous rock in they quickly demonstrated Web marks about improper running all their favorite past con- an open clearing (it was likely why. After taking one look Let’s face it, the Web De- form and weapons handling. tenders but had a greater due to this vulnerable loca- around the dingy stadium, partment isn’t exactly known Even with all these attention- appreciation for the natural tion that they were shot). A&E was violently ill. How- for their physical prowess, seeking efforts, most of the beauty of the arena than the Features was found by News ever, things began looking which made them an unlikely other departments forgot violence. With their keen eye in a coma on the ground, hav- up once the Games began, survivor in The Spectator’s about Copy. However, after for detail, they were skilled ing presumably fallen off the as A&E had a ball thrifting First Annual Hunger Games. a verbal and physical surprise at camouflage and becoming rock after being bowed. In around the Cornucopia for Despite this weakness, Web attack in the middle of the one with the bushes. They Features’s last moments, they any snacks and vinyls they got off to a good start by night on Science about why also thought they could “be- attacked a nearby shrub for could get their hands on. sticking to the outskirts of their weapons didn’t come come one” with the berries “rejecting their love” and at- Things began to heat up when the Cornucopia to grab sup- from credible sources, Copy they found, though sadly, tempted to lick the News re- the department overheard plies, including small bits of met their demise running off this match was not one made porters present. They passed Layout saying that they didn’t electronics, such as wires, ca- a cliff in their getaway. in heaven. Frantically try- away soon after. Final words: really “get” Phoebe Bridgers. pacitors, and antennas. Web ing to preserve their legacy, “Jared—slayer of men.” A&E swiftly delivered a fatal then had to sprint (though Layout they painted a self-portrait hammer blow to the depart- it was more like a light jog) Going into the games, the on a nearby tree with their Opinions ment’s head, ending Layout’s out into the arena in order Layout Department had a big own blood. Then, they sought The Opinions Department tenure in the Games. How- to avoid being taken out by advantage. Somehow, they after Photo for a final, grue- was, frankly, not a big fan of ever, A&E lost their streak any of the remaining depart- obtained the blueprints to some picture and went to the the Hunger Games as an insti- when they stumbled upon a ments. After finding fresh the arena beforehand with- best viewpoint for the sunset, tution. They wrote several- few delicious looking ber- water in the woods, Web got out the Capitol’s knowledge. expertly knowing that this thousand-word rebuttals to ries that they blended into to work creating tools from Once the games began, Lay- place would be where Photo all of the Capitol’s arguments a scrumptious (but tragically their scrap pieces. They first out immediately went to a was. Photo turned around, so regarding the Games’ purpose poisonous) smoothie. built a signal jammer as they pre-scouted clearing and Art thought it would be funny but still wound up as con- hoped that they would be able began work on a shelter. Of to stab them. It wasn’t. Af- testants all the same. Their Humor to block the signal from the course, Layout was able to ter being strangled and pho- Point-Counterpoints about Competing in the games Capitol’s tracking devices and create a very aesthetically tographed in a strange series the ethical implications of completely ironically, the escape the arena. Noticing pleasing house, but it came of events, Art decided to ac- having a bunch of pubescents Humor Department was a that Web had disappeared, with some downsides. The cept their end. With a dra- kill each other in a bubble largely ineffective tribute. the Capitol sent in Peace- noise created by construc- matic monologue and scream, wasn’t as impactful as the de- Adhering to their policy of keepers to execute Web for tion led A&E right to Layout’s Art perished. E-mails From a College I SHALL SEND AVALANCH- NOW. Bobert Robert versity of Institute Saint continued from page 31 ES OF OUR MERCHANDISE Bobert. McHarverd class of 2025 to TO YOUR HOUSE. I KNOW April 2020 admit you. Sorry! -Bobby YOUR ADDRESS. I KNOW March 2020 Dear Applicant, Sincerely, YOUR FAMILY. I READ Dear Applicant, What a crazy year it’s Bobert Robert February 2020 YOUR DIARY. YOU CAN’T Thank you for submitting been! So many talented, av- TO YOU, MY ARCHEN- HIDE. YOUR FINAL DEAD- your application! We’ll get erage students have applied. EMY, LINE EXTENSION IS UN- back to you soon. Unfortunately, we don’t have ( -d+ ) !
IF YOU DO NOT APPLY, TIL MARCH 13TH. SUBMIT Sincerely, enough room in the Uni-
Full link: stuyspec.com/humor/disrespectator/not-a-rick-roll-not-clickbait link: Full
Me. Right, → clickbait
10) Hey Idiots, Guess Who Got Into a College. That’s That’s College. a Into Got Who Guess Idiots, Hey 10) Future Distant the in Sometime Stuyvesant, 9) Waitlist Harvard the off → → not roll
8) Sample Letter of Continued Interest to Get You You Get to Interest Continued of Letter Sample 8) Stuyvesant Flee 1KK Homeroom From Freshmen News! Breaking 7) College → → rick a
6) E-mails from a a from E-mails 6) War Civil Stuyvesant the of Account Survivor’s A 5) Period Nap a Against Case The 4) → → not disrespectator humor
Block Creative of Curse The 3) Tragedy American An Ads: Game Mobile 2) Road? the Cross Chicken the Did How 1) → → → spec stuy Answer Key Answer