December 2009 Sometimes Known As Christmas Day 1 the Warbler the Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

PATRON:- Pam Wells 01483 833394 PRESIDENT:- Peter Guest :- 01483 771649 [email protected] CHAIRMAN: Roy Butler 07747 800687

VICE-CHAIRMAN:- Colin Barnett 01252 328953

SECRETARY, TREASURER 01483 423808 & MEMBERSHIP SECRETARY:- Bryan Jackson 1 Woodstock Grove, Godalming, Surrey, GU7 2AX TRAINING OFFICER:- Vince Penfold

SUPPLIES OFFICERS: - Tony Price 01483 836388 / 07766 973304

R.A.. DELEGATE:- Brian Reader 01483 480651

HONORARY AUDITOR:- Ken Chivers

COMMITTEE:- Ricky Green - Youth Development 07793 205023 Officer Derek Stovold Christopher Cook Meril Readett Corin Readett—Minutes Secretary WARBLER Editor—Mac McBirnie, 16 Robins Dale 01483 835717 / 07770 643229 Knaphill Woking Surrey GU21 2LQ [email protected]

INSIDE THIS MONTH’S WARBLER Page 1: Agenda Page 2 : From the Chair Page 3 : Youth Academy Meeting Page 4 : Mac’s Musings Page 5/6 : September Minutes /Accounts Page 7/8 : Murphy’s Meanderings Page 9 : New Year’s Dinner Menu Page 11: Graham Poll—Referee Crisis Looming Page 15 : Keep on whistling at 83 Page 16 : What would you do? Page 18 : Membership Page 20 : It’s not all black in Scotland Page 21 : Guest Speakers Page 22: This month’s speaker Page 24 : Plum Tree Page 26/27 : My Adventure with Refereeing—A Polish view The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

Meadow Sports Football Club Loop Road Playing Fields, Loop Road, Kingfield, Woking, Surrey, GU22 9BQ 7.30pm for a prompt 8pm start

AGENDA

 CHAIRMAN’S OPENING COMMENTS

 OUR GUEST SPEAKER

Steve Tomlinson

 BREAK

 DISCUSSION CORNER

 SOCIETY BUSINESS

 ANY OTHER BUSINESS

NEXT MEETING MONDAY 4th January 2010 Guest Speakers Peter Kirkup and Mike Mullarkey

THE MAGAZINE DEADLINE The deadline for the January Warbler will be Friday 25th December 2009 sometimes known as Christmas Day 1 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Well what an absorbing meeting we had in November when we had Gary Willard and Martin Bodenham as our guest speakers. Whilst we had the projector and screen available for them both, they certainly did not require them as they kept us enthralled for nearly 90 minutes with their talk on both Assessing and Coaching at Football League, Panel and Contributory Levels and also Martin‘s new role involv- ing both this and being a first Class Umpire. The change of the white ball now used in Floodlit games at so many overs was also an interesting fact. Thank you both for your visit and our good wishes are sent to you both!!!

Talking about Guest Speakers, we do have the pleasure of one of our own members, Steve Tomlinson, as our speaker for our next and Christmas Meet- ing on Monday, 7th December 2009 starting at 8 p.m. His talk is entitled "Whose line is it anyway" and I am sure that as a new speaker (to us at least) it will provide an interesting evening for us all, and the committee are hopeful that you will attend and enjoy. Being as it is nearly Christmas, our patron Pamela Wells will be provid- ing her usual array of nibbles and sandwiches, etc on the evening, and we will be having our Christmas Raffle as well. Whilst our secretary will be arranging assorted prizes for this raffle, if any members wish to donate any gifts towards the raffle, please kindly bring them along on the evening to give to Bryan or myself.

I‘d like to remind members of two forthcoming events which usually occur around this time of the year both happening during the second weekend in January 2010 1. 9th January is the fourth Woking Referees Society Christmas Dinner which is once more being held at the Worplesdon Place Hotel. Without stealing any of Mac‘s thunder, please support this event as it is the time of the year to bring the good lady (or feller) out for a three course meal for under £20 each including our own private suite for the evening. Please give your names to Mac as soon as possible.

2. 10th January is the Sussex 6 - a - side Football Competition at Haywards Heath. The kick-off time is unknown at present but anybody wishing to play or support the society please contact Corin Readett as soon as possible to give your name.

For our first meeting in the New Year, we have the pleasure of Mike Mul- larkey and Peter Kirkup, who have represented England at the European Champi- onships as well as being assistant referees at the Cup Final in 2008. We are sure that this will be a wonderful evening for the Society so remember the date, Monday January 4th 2010. Again we hope you will support the Society, as we do try to vary the Guest Speakers for you all to enjoy.

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I do not feel the need to comment on the Handball goal on Wednesday night suf- fice to say that once again, we, in England, still have the best officials in the Euro- pean Union bar none, as it is a known fact that Mr. Henry would not have got away with it in England. Whilst you would not expect the referee to spot the incident, an assistant referee would have surely flagged for it. Whilst again he ad- mitted the offence, isn‘t it possible also that there was an offside before the handball as well? I feel that FIFA have got away by covering themselves by asking if the two nations wish to replay the game, they might look into it. No chance, I say as I cannot think for one moment that France would agree to a re-match as they don‘t have too.

I do hope your games are going well for you all, and I now look forward to seeing you all on the 7th December.

With all my best wishes,

Roy

A small boy was crying his eyes out at a football match. Seeing his plight, a policeman came up to him and asked what the problem was. "I've lost my dad," cried the boy. "What's he like?" asked the policeman. "Beer, fags and women," said the boy.

Woking Referees Society

Academy

A meeting of the Woking Referee‘s Society Academy will take place on Monday 7th December 2009 commencing at 7.15 at

Meadow Sports Football Club Loop Road Playing Fields, Loop Road, Kingfield, Woking, Surrey, GU22 9BQ Ricky Green – Youth Development Officer 39 Mowbray Avenue, Byfleet, Surrey, KT14 7PF Mob – 07793 205023

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By the time you read this dear members, I shall hopefully be some where between Lisbon and Northern Spain having with a bit of luck, soaked up some Canaries sun and put back on all the weight I‘ve been trying to loose since our last cruise. Need- less to say, please accept my apologies for absence on December 7th and hope you all have a great meeting. I‘d also like to wish you all a wonderful Christmas and a healthy and prosperous New Year. My thanks also to Tony who has stood in as postmaster this month. You will find the menu for our New Year‘s Dinner in this edition, which is to be held once again at Worplesdon Place. I‘d be grateful if you could e-mail me your choices by the January meeting at the latest.

I have developed a theory that the nicer a manager is to you when you first speak and/or meet, the greater the chance he (or she) will be giving you grief in equal measure by the end of the game. The friendly voice on the phone, e mails with maps, directions and post codes for that curse of modern driving—the SAT NAV- ; a warm greeting at the club; nice clean changing room; a cup of tea; what a great initiative the Respect Campaign is; what a great bunch of lads he (or she) has in the team; only want to get out their and play football; what a pleasure it is to have a proper referee; and so it goes on. This, my fellow referees, is all a ploy; a ruse, a stratagem to lull you into a false sense of bonhomie. For beware, the players will be the biggest bunch of whingers on the planet. Complaining when they think they‘ve been fouled, throwing their hands in the air in disbelief when you dare to award a decision against them. The constant badgering, gradually starts to wear you down. Eventually you issue a card for dissent. Again the wide eyed incredulity, the garbled name. ( ―how do you spell that‖ I always ask—even if it‘s Tom Smith) Then the manager starts up. No more Mr Nice Guy. You‘ve all been there—heard it all I‘m sure.

Did anyone watch the Man U v Chelsea game a few weeks back? Rooney was booked for dissent and at the end of the game walked up to Martin Atkinson who was standing with his assistants shaking the players hands. Martin held his hand out but Rooney didn‘t appear to take it, possibly he made some comment (he was later reprimanded by The FA for mouthing ―12th man‖ to the cameras) but it was Martin‘s dismissive wave of the hand at Rooney which I thought was pure class.

In last month‘s Guildford Referee‘s Magazine I spotted an article by Mike Ballard, the magazine‘s editor and editor also of the Surrey FA Newsletter. Now I‘m sure many of you know Mike personally or like me through his editorials but I loved his, what I‘ve called ―A month in the Life of Mike‖ I can only presume that Mike is retired and it makes me think ―I can‘t wait‖ but unfortunately I‘ll have to put in a few more years yet. You will gather from his article that he is a keen Sunderland fan! Bet he enjoyed the win over the Gooners last weekend.

Bit of a quandary this month as I‘ve not yet received my November copy of the Chiltern Referee, without which dear readers, your Warbler would be a much poorer place. So what about ―what would you do?‖ I hear you cry. Well never fear. A few month‘s ago my anonymous donator sent me a number of similar questions, see page 17, but unfortunately he ( or she) didn‘t send any answers. May need some help from Vince on this! Yours in Sport - Mac

4 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society Woking Referee’s Society Meeting Minutes – Monday 2nd November 2009

Chairman’s Opening remarks: Meeting opened at 8.05pm. Chairman welcomed guest speakers Gary Willard and Martin Bodenham. A minutes silence was then held for the recently departed Peter Butcher and Mia van Peborgh.

Guest Speakers – Gary Willard - PGMOL Referee Coach and Martin Boden- ham - FA Referee Coach and ECB Cricket Umpire

Gary gave a description of his role as a PGMOL Referee coach. He is 1 of 7 re- gional referee coaches. He explained how the coaching system works for both Referees and Assistant Referees. He has 8 to look after at present. He explained that he watches 70+ games per season and ran through what he does on match days. He described his role as a ‗friend / advisor‘ to the referees / assistants in his charge

Martin explained his role as a coach to level 3 referees. A role that has existed for 3 years. He currently has 12 referees to look after, 9 new level 3 referees and 3 with a potential to proceed to a higher level. It is very similar to what Gary does. He also spoke about his role as an ECB cricket umpire (he is the first person to officiate at the highest level in both Football and Cricket). He is one of 24 umpires on the full list and is appointed to officiate from April to September. He went on to compare the similarities and differences between officiating at the highest level in both sports, including what is included in the Umpires annual fitness test, self ap- praisal system and how players are disciplined at the end of each day.

A Q&A session followed.

Chairman gave vote of thanks.

Apologies for Absence Hamish Brown, Corin Readett, Ricky Green, Ken Chivers, Glenn LaRoche, David Cooper, Emily McBirnie, Bill Collis, Lawrence Read, Greg Read, Gary Matthews

New Members There were no new members in attendance.

Minutes of the last meeting – Proposed: Brian Reader Seconded: Anthony McBirnie Matters arising – None Arising. Chairman’s Report – Reminder that guest speaker for December will be Steve Tomlinson, who is a society member. There will be a small buffet laid on by our patron as well as a Christ- mas Raffle

5 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society Secretary’s Report – A specimen of the design for a new society tie has been received from Mundays and ties are on order and will hopefully be received in time for Christmas. Nothing additional to report that has not been sent by email or listed in the Warbler

Treasurer/Membership Report – Members currently up to 92. We are the largest society in Surrey at the end of Oc- tober and in the top 15 largest in England. Treasurers report as per Warbler.

Supplies Officer Report – Any items required please see, Tony.

Training Officer Report – 24 candidates have just passed the exam and most indicated their intent to join the RA, although to date only 1 had although a further 6 had made an approach. A further 25 candidates are currently going through training and another course due to start in January.

R.A Delegates Report – No meeting held.

Discussion Corner - There was a short discussion on the fact that despite the ‗respect‘ programme the number of yellow cards given for dissent has increased this season. There was a further discussion following an incident at the Cheltenham v Crewe Football League game at the weekend, when the 2nd half started whilst the Crewe goalkeeper was absent (‗in the toilet‘), he ran onto the field of play and the game was stopped after 45 seconds of the 2nd half, for actions to be taken.

Any other business – Small sided (eg 5 a side) competitions must be affiliated and sanctioned if in doubt contact County Office for advice. County FA Benevolent Fund latest list of those making donations did not include Woking Ra abd a question was asked why. The treasurer repliedthat this is that no donation had been made so far this year and donations have been made in the past. The committee will consider making a donation at its next meeting. Date for 4th Annual Xmas dinner is Saturday 9th January at the Worplesdon Place, please contact Mac McBirnie for details. Date of next meeting – 7th December 2009, Meeting Closed at 22.05

Society Accounts—November 2009 General £986.95 Supplies £236.03 Belgium £0.00 Youth Fund £113.50 Total £1,336.48 6 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

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Tony Murphy

A message from our Membership Secretary

We are the largest society in Surrey, but here are the figures that show we are the 12th largest in England. I have included the 1 membership I have still to send to RA office. If we can get some of the newly qualified guys to join we should break into the top 10! Month End

Regards October 2009

Bryan Rank Society Membership 1 Eastleigh 140 2 Reading 129 3 AFA & Lonsar 124 4 Harrow 111 5= Preston 110 5= Bristol 110 7 Cambridge 107 8 Solihull 98 9 Sheffield 96 10 Huntingdon 95 11 North Middlesex 93 12 Woking 92 13 High Wycombe 91 14 Chelmsford 90 15 Maidstone 89 16= Rotherham 88 16= Coventry 88 18 Nuneaton 87 19 Burton 86 20 Croydon 83

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9th January 2009, Worplsedon Place, Worplesdon 7.00 for 7.30pm

Starters Garlic & herb breaded mushrooms with ranch & BBQ dip Crispy potato shells with sour cream and chive dip with choice of fillings—bacon and mushroom with Italian tomato sauce or—brie and caramelised onion relish Smoked chicken and bacon pate with toasted bloomer bread and caramelised onion relish Prawn cocktail, with tangy smoked salmon and citrus marie rose sauce and rustic bread.

Mains Rump steak 7oz chargrilled to your liking served with chips and either mixed salad or tomato and mushrooms Salmon fillet with béarnaise sauce new potatoes fresh veg and Italian tomato sauce Chicken breast wrapped in Parma ham filled with garlic and herb cream sauce, chargrilled served new potatoes fresh veg and Italian tomato sauce. Maple Pork ribs, a rack of smoky flavour ribs with bourbon and black bbq sauce chips and mixed salad Mediterranean Tomato Risotto creamy, white wine, Mediterranean veg, topped with cheese shavings. Served with garlic bread. (for an extra £1 top with either chargrilled chicken breast, salmon fillet or skewered prawns. Caesar salad bowl, with baked croutons, anchovies and cheese Shavings. Top with the above Risotto extras for no additional cost

Desserts Chocolate fudge sundae, ice cream with fudge brownie chunks, whipped cream, fudge sauce etc Caramel Apple crumble with either custard, ice cream, cream, or crème fraiche Profiteroles with either ice cream or crème fraiche and hot chocolate flavour sauce Banoffee pie with fresh banana and drizzled with warm toffee sauce

All for the fantastic sum of

only £14.95

Cheques (payable to Woking RA ) or cash either in advance or on the night to Mac or Bryan

Choices must be to Mac ([email protected]) by January 4th meeting

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You must be joking

The Great Robbery A burglary recently occurred at Newcastle United's ground and the entire contents of the trophy room were stolen. The police are now looking for a man with a black- and- white carpet.

The Memory Man Dave the Scouser is touring America on holiday and stops in a remote bar in the hills of Nevada. He's chatting to the barman when he spies an old Indian sitting in a corner-complete with full tribal gear, long plaits and wrinkles. "Who's he?" asks Dave. "That's the Memory Man," says the barman. "He knows everything. He can remember any fact. Go and try him out." So Dave wanders over and asks: "Who won the 1965 FA Cup Final?" "Liverpool," replies the Memory Man. The tourist is amazed: "Who did they beat?" "Leeds," comes the reply. "And the score?" "2-1." Dave tries something more specific: "Who scored the winning goal?" The Indian does not even blink: "Ian St John." The Liverpudlian returns home and regales his relatives and friends with his tale, and he's determined to return and pay his re- spects to this amazing man. Ten years later he has saved enough money and returns to America. After weeks of searching through the towns of Nevada, Dave finds the Memory Man in a cave in the mountains. The Scouser steps forward, bows and greets the Indian in his traditional native tongue: "How." The Memory Man squints at him and says: "Diving header in the six-yard box."

In praise of… football referees

The Guardian, Tuesday 10 November 2009 Unfit, unfocused, unprofessional – it has already been a season of ceaseless brick- bats for football referees. Martin Atkinson yesterday became the latest to feel the force of Manchester United manager Alex Ferguson's almost weekly apoplexy, and the pressures of the game increasingly manifest themselves in rage against match officials. From the Manchester United manager to those fearing the sack at the bot- tom, they have a common trait – if in doubt, blame the ref. Too often, they become the focal point for the mind games, justifications and obfuscations that are professional football's basest currency. Inevitably, behaviour seen on Match of the Day fil- ters down to lower levels and referees of Sunday league and underage football report increasing hostility, rising to outright violence, from players and supporters alike. The culture of instant judgment aped from reality television and radio phone-ins now transmits its least attractive traits to ordinary occupations. At £57,000, a Pre- mier League referee's wages are not inconsiderable, but it is rarely embarked upon as a career choice. Indeed the willingness to accept such regular abuse for love of the game is evidence of a particularly forgiving mindset. But the number of young officials coming into the game is dwindling and ex-players, cosseted by more lucrative careers, show little appetite to take up the whistle. Football will always need referees, but why they should need football is becoming less obvious.

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GRAHAM POLL: REAL refereeing crisis is looming Referees make mistakes - I should know - but Sir Alex Ferguson's attacks on Alan Wiley and Andre Marriner have been wide of the mark. However, much as it hurts to admit it, he is not far from the truth; there is a very real refereeing crisis looming in the Premier League. When refereeing went professional in 2001 there were 24 of us, most already very experienced in the Premier League. We averaged just 16 games a season, even the best doing only 24 top-flight games. We were fit, felt we had earned every appointment and were up for the game from the first whistle. Despite that, we still retired aged 48. Only a few years ago, we seldom had more than one appointment each weekend, either as referee or fourth official, and often dropped into the Football League, not as a punishment but just to keep us fresh and motivated. When moving up the pecking order a referee would do a top-four game and then aspire to the toughest game, that is Liverpool v Manchester United. You need to understand the pressure that game brings, how passionate the crowd is and how intense the two most successful teams' rivalry is before stepping out at Anfield to try to control it. Now we have only 15 professional referees; incredibly only 11 were fit and available last Saturday and Sunday. Five refereed at a game on one day and acted as the fourth official on the other. Three of those are refereeing again this week in the Carling Cup. Yes, the ProZone statistics will tell you that they covered more ground than the majority of professional footballers 20 years younger. But the statistics do not measure mental fatigue, which can be crucial in making the wrong decision. We now ask much of our professional referees and scrutinise them like never before, utilising slow-motion replays which they, of course, cannot benefit from. The resource pool for refereeing looks bereft of tal- ent, but for the odd exception. Why else would the management let the numbers of professional referees drop to 15, those including six over the UEFA retire- ment age of 45? FIFA used to allow referees to continue until they were 50 but recognised the speed of the game and its demands had intensified and so reduced the retire- ment age to 45. England remains the only senior professional league to retain referees past that FIFA age (Italy, Spain and Germany respect the 45-year barrier) and looking at the resources one can see why. There is a stark choice for the Premier League: either keep extending the age limit and risk fatigue causing mistakes or throw inexperienced referees into the big games. Over-worked: Chris Foy was refereeing at Barnsley on Tuesday night just 48 hours Daily Mail after taking charge of West Ham v Arsenal in the Premier League

11 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society A month in the life of Mike

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13 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society BULLSHIT & BRILLIANCE

A wealthy old lady decides to go on a photo safari in Africa, taking her faithful aged poodle named Roy, along for the company. One day the poodle starts chasing butterflies and, before long, Roy discovers that he's lost. Wandering about, he notices a leopard heading rapidly in his direc- tion with the intention of having lunch. The old poodle thinks, ‗Oh, oh! I‘m in deep doo-doo now!‘ Noticing some bones on the ground close by, he immediately settles down to chew on the bones with his back to the approaching cat. Just as the leopard is about to leap the old poodle ex- claims loudly, ‗Boy, that was one delicious leopard! I wonder if there are any more around here?‘ Hearing this, the young leopard halts his attack in mid-strike, a look of terror comes over him and he slinks away into the trees. ‗Whew!‘ says the leopard, ‗That was close! That old poodle nearly had me!‘ Meanwhile, a monkey who had been watching the whole scene from a nearby tree, figures he can put this knowledge to good use and trade it for protection from the leopard. So off he goes, but the old poodle sees him heading after the leopard with great speed, and figures that something must be up. The monkey soon catches up with the leopard, spills the beans and strikes a deal for himself with the leopard. The young leopard is furious at being made a fool of and says, ‗Here, monkey, hop on my back and see what‘s going to happen to that conniving canine!‘ Now, the old poodle sees the leopard coming with the monkey on his back and thinks, ‗What am I going to do now?‘. But instead of running, the dog sits down with his back to his attackers, pretending he hasn‘t seen them yet and, just when they get close enough to hear, the old poodle says. ‗Where‘s that damn monkey? I sent him off an hour ago to bring me another leopard!‘ Moral of this story: Don‘t mess with old farts. Age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! Bullshit and brilliance only come with age and experience.

THEY GET WORSE Did you hear about the female mouse that went into a music shop and asked to buy a mouse-organ? The shop assistant said ―Weren‘t you in here yesterday?‖. The mouse replied ―No, that was our Monica.‖ To the hell with Rangers The rivalry between Celtic and Rangers in Scotland is well known. A Celtic fan looking for trouble went up to a perfect stranger in a pub in Sauchiehall Street and shouted in his ear: 'To hell with the Rangers!' The stranger looked puzzled. 'I don't know what you're talking about, bud,' he said. 'I'm an American from Houston, Texas.' The Celtic fan looked nonplussed for a moment but then, with a flash of inspiration, he yelled, 'To hell with the Texas Rangers, then!' 14 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

Referee, 83, to keep on whistling

One of England's oldest referees has said he has no plans to retire after more than 50 years in the role. Harry Hardy, 83, from Derbyshire, first took charge of a game in 1957 and still officiates at Long Eaton Sunday League football matches. Despite admitting the game is now played at a much faster pace, he insisted decades riding a bicycle meant he was fit enough to keep up. The FA said it did not record ages but thanked Mr Hardy for his dedication. Mr Hardy, from Ilkeston, started refereeing when he was working for the Ra- leigh bicycle company in Nottingham. He said he still felt physically capable of the work: "If you can keep running, you're OK. "If your eyes go you have glasses, so that is alright - mind you, they still think you are blind!" But he added that he had no time for modern players' attitude. ― Harry's story really captures the spirit of grassroots football in this country ‖ FA spokesperson "The point is you haven't got time to listen to them. "I always tell them when they ask: 'What was that for ref?', I say 'I ain't got time to tell you kid'. "We have only got 90 minutes, and if I stop to tell them everything I blow for we would never finish." Keith Compton of the Derbyshire FA said Mr Hardy was given a long-service award several years ago at a match at Derby County's Pride Park ground. "I don't know if he is the oldest referee in the country but he is definitely the oldest on our books," Mr Compton said. An FA spokesperson commented: "Harry's story really captures the spirit of grassroots football in this country and just goes to show that refereeing can be enjoyed by everyone. "The FA are looking to recruit 8,000 new referees by 2012 and it's people like Harry that inspire a whole new generation of grassroots match officials."

When you kick off Over breakfast one morning, a little boy kept staring intently at his grandfather. '1s anything the matter, son?' the old man asked. 'No, Gramps. I was just wondering what position you play in the football team.' 'What are. you talking about?' laughed Gramps. 'I'm far too old to play football.' 'Oh,' said the little. boy. 'It's just that Dad' said that when you kicked off, we'd be able to afford a new car.'

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17 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society Jones Chris Arbuckle Nick Ashworth Nigel Jones David Baker Edward Kelly Mark Barnett Colin Knock Geoff Bateman Anthony Langran Daniel Bentley Peter Langran David Blair Paul Langran Kathryn Briggs Alan LaRoche Glenn Brooks Micky Lawrence Mick Brooks Sean Levett Richard Brown Hamish Lomax Roy Burchett Stuart Loveridge Tony Busby Chris Luck Robbie Butler Roy Maher Steve Cable Lee Matthews Gary Chivers Ken McBirnie Anthony Cochrane Craig McBirnie Emily Collins Neil McLaren Bruce Collis Bill Melin Paul Cooper Dave Minto Alex Creswick Jon Mitchinson Robert Creswick Terry O Connor Andy Davies Derek Penfold Vince Dexter Andy Price Tony Dodd Daniel Read Greg Duff Simon Read Lawrence Ekins Graham Read Martin Ekins Simon Reader Brian Eve Spencer Readett Corin Exworth Sam Readett Merill Fouracre Max Rudrum Steve Gasson Phil Simkin Robert Goggin Alastair Smith Eamonn Gorringe Paul Stovold Derek Green Rick Thurgood Adam Gregory Cedge Tomlinson Ashley Griffiths Craig Tomlinson Steve Guest Peter Van Dorp James Hadley Chris Watson Alan Hailstone Richard Webb Brian Hanney Alex Webb Michael Hanney Peter Wells Pam Hanney Sam Woodruff Andy Heighes Gareth Woodyer Tara Howard Paul Wright Clem Hughes Robert Wright Mark Jackson Bryan Godolphin Ed Honoured Guest Roy Lomax 18 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society You must be joking

A Christmas Letter from Hamish

One day a letter came through addressed in a shaky handwriting to God with no ac- tual address. A postal worker thought he should open it to see what it was about. The letter read:

Dear God,

I am an 83 year old widow, living on a very small pension. Yesterday someone stole my purse. It had £100 in it which was all the money I had until my next pension payment. Next Friday is Christmas Day and I had invited two of my friends over for dinner. Without that money I have nothing to buy food with, have no family to turn to, and you are my only hope. Can you please help me.

Yours sincerely,

Edna

The postal worker was touched. He showed the letter to all the other workers. Each one dug into their pockets and came up with a few pounds.

By the time he made the rounds he had collect £96 which was put into an envelope and sent to the woman. The rest of the day all the workers felt a warm glow thinking of Edna and the dinner she would be able to share with her friends.

Christmas came and went. A few days later another letter came from the same old lady to God. All the workers gathered around while the letter was opened. It read:

Dear God,

How can I ever thank-you enough for what you did for me? Because of your gift of love I was able to have a glorious dinner for my friends. We had a very nice day and I told my friends of your wonderful gift.

Incidentally there was £4 missing. I think it might have been those bastards at the post office.

Yours sincerely,

Edna

A supporter arrived at the ground one Saturday to find the place completely empty. He went to the office and asked an official, 'What time does the match start?' 'There's no match today,' replied the official. 'But there must be!' argued the fan. 'It's Saturday.' 'I'm telling you there's no match today,' repeated the official. 'But there's always a match on Saturday afternoon,' said the fan, 'even if it's only a reserves game.' 'Watch my lips,' shouted the irate official. 'There is no M-A-T-F-C-H today!' 'Well, for your information,' the would-be spectator shouted back, 'there's no F in match.', 'That's what I've been trying to tell you!' yelled the official.

19 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society It’s not all black in Scotland IT WAS revealed earlier this month that 500 referees each year decide to give up officiating matches in Scotland – but that problem does not extend to amateur football in Edinburgh and the Lothians. The end of the October week is an annual nuisance to organisers of matches in the Lothian & Edin- burgh Amateur Football Association (LEAFA). At the weekend, 18 matches were called off due to match officials taking holidays.

Unlike in many leagues around the country, however, the scenario of multiple postponements over a weekend was purely a one-off in local amateur football and the reason for call-offs of an altogether different nature. Referees remain keen to take charge of LEAFA matches and the evident on-field rapport between players and referees is notable for its contrast to often-strained relationships in the senior game and the subsequent dearth of match officials further down the football pyramid.

Paul Reid, secretary of the Edinburgh & District arm of the national referees' organisation, explains the continued attraction of officiating at amateur level.

"For most guys, it's about being involved and giving something back to the game," he says. "If your Saturday has been about playing football every week for ten to 15 years, there's a gap to be filled once you stop playing.

"There are always isolated incidents at amateur level but, on the whole, clubs are supportive and there is a mutual respect between clubs and referees. Generally, match officials enjoy doing it."

LEAFA president Charles Gallacher explains that a mutual appreciation between officials and players helps his association retain the use of referees.

"Our members' clubs are strongly disciplined and our good standing with referees lies with our good discipline," he says. "We expect a lot from our membership and I think referees appreciate that. As well as that, we find that once referees come to us, we very rarely lose them to another association.

"We also have many referees who have played in the association. A lot of referees start in their late teens or early 20s and perhaps don't understand a lot of situations. The guys who have played the game have a different perspective.

"You don't get many ex-players nationally who become referees, and here's why – you get the aver- age player who, at 35, stops playing and the people at senior level would say they're too old to become a referee at that age – the top senior referees have to retire at 45. I strongly disagree with that, because a footballer by his nature is a competitive person and would want to do as well as they could to get to the top of the tree in those ten years."

Frustrations may boil over both on the field and from the sidelines, and in any competitive sport this is deemed natural. It's how that pent-up dissatisfaction is contained or vented that defines the respect shown by players and supporters to match officials. The president of the Scottish Amateur Football Association, Angus Mackay, says it's because referees at amateur level are better-equipped to man- manage players that they suffer less abuse and are therefore encouraged to carry on officiating.

"It's a two-sided thing. We have a very straightforward disciplinary code, which is there to deal with indiscipline but also to afford referees more protection. Where amateur digresses from senior level, as far as I'm concerned, is referees having a more difficult job when they're in a public park on their own. Referees at amateur level have to use man-management skills to deal with situations a lot more often and a lot of referees will have played the game at some point and most will relate very well to the players.

"Most of them come into the dressing rooms before the start of the match to communicate their thoughts to the teams so people know where they stand. They manage to talk to each other on the same level."

THE SCOTSMAN

20 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

From whistles to watches, flags to record cards, shirts to socks , Tony’s got the lot in his big black bag Help support the society and make sure you give Tony a call for all your refereeing needs 01483 836388 / 07766973304

December 7th : Steve Tomlinson, Woking Society Member

January 4th : Peter Kirkup and Mike Mullarkey

February 1st : John Morton, Head of Premier League Match Delegates

March 1st : Ian Blanchard, Senior National Game Referee Manager

April 5th : Martin Yerby, FA Cup Final Assistant Referee 2008

May 3rd : TBA

21 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

Steve Tomlinson Biographical Details- Referee Qualified: September 1980

Joined Woking Referees Society: September 1980

Married to Michelle

Two Sons Ashley 17, Glenn 14

Employed by Grace Construction Products as a Site Support Engineer for the concrete division

Career

Promoted by Berks and Bucks FA to Class 1

Promoted to Southern League Assistant Referee Season 1990-1991

Promoted to Southern League Referee Season 1995-1996

Promoted to National List Assistant Referee Season 2001-2002

Promoted to Panel List Referee Season 2002-2003

Honours:

April 2001 Football League Youth Cup Alliance Final- Reserve Referee

April 2001 Southern League Cup Final- Reserve Referee

April 2004 Hampshire Senior Cup Final Referee

May 2006 Surrey Senior Cup Final Referee

May 2006 Conference Play Off Final Reserve Referee

A message from Gavin Ward , guest speaker at our October meeting

Hi Roy, Many thanks for your note. It was my pleasure to speak to your guys and I hope they got something from my talk. Just like Ray Olivier, I also purchased a rather nice shirt with the voucher from M&S, so could you please pass on my thanks to your branch. All the best Gavin 22 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

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23 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

Surrey Senior Cup, 2nd Round. Guildford City Vs Redhill. Assistant Referees ; Greg Read and Ricky Green Saturday Senior Cup Merstham v Ashford Town (middx) Asst referee ; Richard Hailstone

Saturday Premier cup Warlingham v Sutton United reserves Referee; Richard Hailstone

FA Vase 2nd round proper Wembley v Hoddesdon Town Referee ;Vince Penfold Assistant Referees ; Ricky Green & Daniel Dodd

Women‘s County Cup 2nd Round Milford & Whitley v Surbiton Referee; Emily McBirnie

F.A . Premier Academy;U18s Fulham v Coventry City Assistant Referee; Paul Gorringe

FA Academy U16s Fulham v West Ham Utd Referee; Paul Gorringe

FA Trophy 3rd Round Qualifying- Dover Ath v Dartford - Assistant Referee ; Michael Webb

Sunday Premier Cup 2nd Rnd Follyhill rangers v Carlton utd Colin Barnett

Saturday Premier Cup Camberley Town Reserves v Corinthian Casuals FC Reserves Assistant Referee ; Brian Reader

Stop Press — “Paul Blair takes on County Cup single handed” 8/11/09 Surrey Sunday Junior County Cup 2nd Round - Referee 15/11/09 Surrey Sunday Youth County Cup 2nd Round - Referee 21/11/09 Surrey Saturday Lower Junior Cup 2nd Round - Referee 22/11/09 Surrey Lower Junior Cup 2nd Round – Referee

24 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

Advice on the prevention of Stalking and Harassmentment

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Advice and Lecture on this specialist subject

Website: www.hamishbrownmbe.com Email: [email protected] 25 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

26 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

Courtesy of Chiltern Referee 27 The Warbler The Magazine of the Woking Referees‘ Society

Courtesy of the book of football quotations

28 WARBLER REFERENCE GUIDE 2009/10

THE FOOTBALL ASSOCIATION Wembley Stadium PO Box 1966 www.TheFA.com London SW1P 9EQ FAMAO National Managers Janie Frampton Education 07984 003476 “name”@theFA.com Ray Olivier Workforce Roger Vaughan Recruitment and Retention Surrey County Football Association Connaught House 36 Bridge Street Leatherhead, www.surreyfa.com Surrey, KT22 8BZ 01372 373543 Referee Competition Manager Mark Wood [email protected] Appointments Secretary Rod Wood 0208 979 2477 & 07860 400995 [email protected] Referee Development Officer Tim Lawrence 01372 373543 Promotion Assessor Co-ordinator Martin Allen 07769 793493 [email protected] Referees Association of England 1, Westhill Rd, Counden, Coventry CV6 2AD www.footballreferee.org 024 7660 1701

Surrey County Referees Association [email protected] Honorary Secretary Brian Fish 01483 420007 [email protected]

Guildford & Woking Alliance League Terry Hawkett 01932 887058 07778 628547 Referees’ Secretary [email protected] Surrey County Intermediate League Adrian Freeman 01483 894351 / 07814 516911 (Western) Referees’ Secretary [email protected] Suburban League Tony King 01189 740465 Assistant Referees’ Secretary [email protected] Combined Counties League Philip Nash 07951 415046 Assistant Referees’ Secretary [email protected] Southern Youth League Peter Harris 01252315856 / 07967 988840 Assistant Referees’ Secretary Peter.harris1767ntlworld.com Camberley & District Sunday League Philip Nash 07951 415046 Referees’ Secretary [email protected] Surrey & Hants Border Sunday League Bob Dick 01428 682542 Referees’ Secretary [email protected] Farnham & District Sunday League Colin Barnett 01252 328953 Referees’ Secretary [email protected] Surrey Elite Intermediate Football League Derek Stovold 07787 590132 Referees’ Secretary [email protected] Surrey Youth League www.wsyl.org.uk Referees’ Secretary Alan Wiggins 01932 789376 [email protected]

Surrey Primary League Phillip Lee 07837 101012 Referees Secretary [email protected] Middlesex County FA 39/41 Roxborough Rd Harrow, Www.middlesexFA.com Middlesex, HA1 1NS 0208 424 8524

Hampshire County FA Winklebury Football Complex, Winklebury Way Www.hampshireFA.com Basingstoke, RG23 8BF 01256 853000

Berks and Bucks County FA 15a London Street, Farringdon Www.berksandbucksFA.com Oxfordshire, SN7 8AG 01367 242099

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