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DISTURBINGLY LIFELIKE SINCE 1992 “RIVER OTTER DIORAMA” BY CURIOUS EXPEDITIONS VOLUME 23 | ISSUE 51 | DECEMBER 18-24, 2014 | FREE [2] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [3] [4] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI alibi VOLUME 23 | ISSUE 51 | DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014

EDITORIAL MANAGING EDITOR/MUSIC EDITOR: Samantha Anne Carrillo (ext. 243) [email protected] FILM EDITOR: Devin D. O’Leary (ext. 230) [email protected] FOOD EDITOR/FEATURES EDITOR : Ty Bannerman (ext. 260) [email protected] ARTS & LIT EDITOR/ WEB EDITOR : Lisa Barrow (ext. 267) [email protected] CALENDARS EDITOR/COPY EDITOR: Mark Lopez (ext. 239) [email protected] CONTRIBUTING WRITERS: Cecil Adams, Steven Robert Allen, Captain America, Gustavo Arellano, Rob Brezsny, Shawna Brown, Suzanne Buck, Eric Castillo, David Correia, Erik Gamlem, Gail Guengerich, Nora Hickey, Kristi D. Lawrence, Ari LeVaux, Mark Lopez, August March, Genevieve Mueller, Amelia Olson, Geoffrey Plant, Benjamin Radford, Jeremy Shattuck, Mike Smith, M. Brianna Stallings, M.J. Wilde, Holly von Winckel PRODUCTION ART DIRECTOR: Jesse Schulz (ext. 229) [email protected] PRODUCTION MANAGER : Archie Archuleta (ext. 240) [email protected] GRAPHIC DESIGNERS: Tasha Lujan (ext. 254) [email protected] Robert Maestas (ext. 254) [email protected] STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER: Eric Williams [email protected] CONTRIBUTING ARTISTS: Ben Adams, Cutty Bage, ¡Brapola!, Michael Ellis, Stacy Hawkinson, KAZ, Robert Maestas, Julia Minamata, Tom Nayder, Ryan North, Jesse Phillips, Brian Steinhoff SALES SALES DIRECTOR: John Hankinson (ext. 265) [email protected] SENIOR DISPLAY ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE: Sarah Bonneau (ext. 235) [email protected] ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES: Valerie Hollingsworth (ext. 263) [email protected] Chelsea Kibbee (ext. 248) [email protected] Laura Liccardi (ext. 264) [email protected] Dawn Lytle (ext. 258) [email protected] Sasha Perrin (ext. 241) [email protected] ADMINISTRATION CONTROLLER: Molly Lindsay (ext. 257) [email protected] ACCOUNTS RECEIVABLE : Courtney Foster (ext. 233) [email protected] FRONT DESK: Constance Moss (ext. 221) [email protected] Renee Chavez (ext. 221) [email protected] EDITOR AND PUBLISHER: Carl Petersen (ext. 228) [email protected] SYSTEMS MANAGER: Kyle Silfer (ext. 242) [email protected] WEB MONKEY: John Millington (ext. 238) [email protected] OWNERS, PUBLISHERS EMERITI: Christopher Johnson and Daniel Scott CIRCULATION CIRCULATION MANAGER : Geoffrey Plant (ext. 252) [email protected] INFORMATION PRINTER: The Santa Fe New Mexican IN LOVING MEMORY: Doug Albin, Martin Candelaria, Michael Henningsen, Eric Johnson, Greg Medara, Mina Yamashita INTERNET SERVICE PROVIDER: Southwest Cyberport (232-7992) [email protected] NATIONAL ADVERTISING: VMG Advertising (888) 278-9866 www.vmgadvertising.com NUCITY PUBLICATIONS, INC. 413 Central NW, Albuquerque, New Mexico 87102 BUSINESS HOURS: 10AM–5PM MON–FRI PHONE: (505) 346-0660 FAX: (505) 256-9651 Alibi (ISSN 1088-0496) is published weekly 52 times per year. The content of this issue is Copyright © 2014 by NuCity Publications, Inc., and may not be reprinted in part or in whole without written consent of the publisher. All rights are reserved. One copy of each edition of Alibi is available to county residents and visitors each week. Anyone caught removing papers in bulk will be prosecuted on theft charges to the fullest extent of the law. Yearly subscription $100, back issues are $3, Best of Burque is $5. Queries and manuscripts should include a self-addressed stamped envelope; Alibi assumes no responsibility for unsolicited material.

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Look, Ma! No Signal! pedestrian traffic as our roadways get safer. More people learning traffic rules out of Dear Alibi, necessity. More order. More adherence to our The amount of car accidents out here is really regulations. A decrease in the lawless no “accident” at all. I am shocked to see how mentality, at least when behind the wheel. many people in the city of Albuquerque—on a And: Money! Who doesn’t like money? daily basis—violate basic traffic laws. I moved City government can always use more money, to Albuquerque four and a half years ago from especially in our state. This provides a way New York. Being that New York and New police can earn money honestly and fairly with Mexico are two very different subcultures, I citizens by enforcing traffic laws. , this feel that they could learn a little from each means that they have to start obeying them other. New York could take a breath and slow too. Police can demonstrate to the community down a little more like New Mexico, and New that they are doing the job that they were Mexico could hold their head a little higher by meant to do: keep people safe by reminding taking pride in upholding order and regulation them to follow safety rules, at least on the in their fair state, like New York. roadways. How? Multiple psychological studies For example, in Albuquerque my partner over the decades have shown that if the and I point out on a weekly basis people who: consequence is delivered immediately blow through red lights, including ; blow following the negative behavior and is severe through four-way stops (does anyone [here] enough, it will provide adequate negative even know the rules for a four-way stop?); reinforcement, thus decreasing the likelihood failure to signal when turning or changing that the negative behavior (poor driving) will lanes, failure to yield the right of way (yes, to occur again. pedestrians too, which personally has occurred How can our local government and police several times, as I am also a street-jogger). In department develop a new and improved addition, driving while distracted—I was rear- traffic law enforcement program? One ended ... on Montaño Road NW by a young suggestion is to model states who have woman who we saw texting in our rearview successfully developed and implemented a mirror, but told us after she hit us that she similar program, like New York, Connecticut, “sneezed”—and undergoing hazardous and etc. Just ask! New enforcement starts from the outright dangerous driving. (Think: mattresses. top down. If the head administrators in the Where do they all come from? Where are they City of Albuquerque as well as in the all going? Why do New Mexicans always seem Albuquerque Police Department take this to buy new mattresses? And why on earth do issue seriously, and enforcement seriously, then they put them on top of ill-fitting cars without so will their employees. being properly tied down?!) Now, given the level of current distrust in We have also been witness to: objects flying both our government and police department out the backs of trucks, trucks without their (both locally and nationally), it would be nice tailgates up and delivery trucks with their rear to spin off of the idea of “transparency.” The door rolled up (all seen on I-40 this summer). police department/local government should set Motorcyclists without helmets are illegal in up a public website to show the community New York State. Out here, where people don’t how much money, per month, is brought in by follow safety rules already, why put yourself in stepping up and enforcing traffic laws, and any more danger?! Not to mention the exactly how that money is then being divided everyday danger of “ordinary” reckless drivers: up and funneled into different community- speeding, music blasting, quickly changing based projects/departments to further improve lanes, trying to squeeze between cars without our community and our state. For example, in touching them and tailgating, only to be May 2014 ticket collection [brought in] stopped at the same light as you, aka the poor $15,429 through the month of May: $5,432 sap who is obeying the speed limit out of the will be given to New Mexico Education goodness of your heart. And oy! Those Department for Albuquerque/Bernalillo tailgaters ... County, $2,581 will be given to the City I understand that New Mexico has a load of recycling program, $—to Medicaid/Medicare, other chronic, culturally based problems it is etc. Monies can be collected in a lump sum dealing with (high rates of poverty, high rates and then divided up by county or city. I will of domestic violence, extremely poor levels of leave that equity part up to the political child well-being, high rates of unemployment, scientists and economists. high dropout rates, etc.). Enforcing traffic laws Make sense? Now if we can then start can be a focused, relatively easy, clear and charging people more for confirmed acts of specific way the great sunny state of New child abuse, DWI/DUI, domestic violence and Mexico can start taking more pride in itself animal abuse within our city/county, that and start separating itself from its lawless, would improve our state’s coffer, as well as our “Wild West” past ... especially in the city of morals and ethics, even more. Albuquerque. But I am getting ahead of myself. If we How else could we benefit from enforcing actually start this traffic traffic laws? Not to mention enforcing DWI enforcement/improvement project (and why and DUI laws, which is a whole issue in itself, not?), this means I am also going to have to and enforcing traffic laws makes people safer. personally start retraining myself to see only Less of our people get hurt. Less of our family red and yellow ... not “pink.” D’oh! and friends die. Less homemade crosses by the sides of the roads. Less white bicycles. More —Courtney Palermo a WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [7] staff over sandwich toppings. Apparently, the Dateline: South Korea disembarked. The 40-year-old Cho’s behavior two were demanding chopped onions rather The daughter of Korean Air’s chairman has caused a furor in South Korea, with many ODDS than sliced onions. As the argument resigned from her post as “vice president in news outlets calling for her ouster. The Dong- escalated, one of the men reached into his charge of cabin service,” after she went nuts A Ilbo newspaper said Ms. Cho’s actions friend’s coat pocket, pulled out a live snake exposed the “sense of entitlement and

D over some nuts in first class. Cho Hyun-ah’s and threw it at employees. According to the freakout became news around the world after supercilious attitude” of South Korea’s N police, no one was injured, but several she delayed a flight from New York to superrich, adding, “Apparently some

A ENDS employees did flee the store. “Obviously, [the Incheon, South Korea, over some improperly members of owner families like Cho see their workers] were very frightened,” police served nuts. Ms. Cho was sitting in the companies like their own kingdoms.” South WEIRD NEWS spokesperson Alyson Edwards told the CBC. airplane’s first-class cabin when she was given Korea’s biggest airline earlier apologized for “There was quite a lot of screaming going a packet of macadamia nuts by a flight the “inconvenience” to passengers but Dateline: Canada on.” Police were summoned at about 7:30am. Workers at a fast food restaurant in attendant. She called over the chief purser defended Cho’s actions as a “reasonable” They located the two suspects nearby and Saskatoon fled after a patron threw a live and berated him for not serving the nuts in a move to improve in-flight service. After took them into custody on charges of snake behind the counter during an bowl. According to Cho, the purser Korean Air tycoon Cho Yang-ho accepted his mischief and causing a disturbance. The argument over diced onions. According to responded with “lies and excuses.” Deciding daughter’s resignation, a company snake was removed from the restaurant and the Saskatoon Police Service, two 20-year- that the purser was “incapable,” Cho ordered spokesperson clarified that Ms. Cho would was determined to be a non-venomous garter old men entered the Tim Hortons restaurant, the plane to return to the gate at New York’s keep her title of vice president even though snake. Police said the snake was unharmed a “fast casual” dining chain known for its JFK airport. The plane was already on the she no longer holds any official role and has and would be released into the wild come coffee and doughnuts, on the morning of runway preparing for takeoff. The flight was no more responsibilities within the company. spring. Monday, Dec. 8. The two began arguing with delayed for about 10 minutes while the purser No word on whether she’ll keep her salary as well.

Dateline: Wisconsin When in doubt, blame it on the fish. According to a story in the Wisconsin Rapids Tribune , a 75-year-old man facing his 10th drunk driving charge told a deputy he hadn’t been drinking; he just smelled like alcohol because he had been eating beer-battered fish. John H. Przybyla was pulled over at 2:27pm on Oct. 12 by an Adams County deputy who saw him make a U-turn in the middle of Highway 13. The deputy followed the vehicle, checked the license plate and found out it belonged to Przybyla—who has a revoked driver’s license. After pulling the vehicle over, the officer asked Przybyla how much he had been drinking. Przybyla replied he had not been consuming alcohol, but had just been at a fish fry on Highway 82 eating beer-battered fish. The deputy arrested Przybyla and took him to Moundview Memorial Hospital in Adams. Przybyla refused to take a blood alcohol test, saying it was against his religion. The deputy contacted a court commissioner, who granted a warrant. Przybyla fought against the test and had to be restrained. Przybyla is scheduled to appear in Adams County Court to answer his latest drunk driving charges on Jan. 21.

Dateline: Florida TCPalm.com reports a 21-year-old man told police in Port St. Lucie he was only masturbating in his yard because his mother wouldn’t let him watch porn in the house anymore. Shortly after 1pm on Nov. 14, Martin County Sheriff’s deputies were called to a home in the Port St. Lucie suburb of Stuart for a report of a nude man. When a sheriff’s lieutenant pulled up, he spotted 21- year-old Anthony Smith “bending down naked in the driveway.” According to the police report, “the suspect then stood up and ran back to his home next door.” Once he got dressed, Smith told deputies his mother won’t let him watch pornography in the house. He told them he now walks naked outside and hopes someone sees him, an experience he likened to a “high.” Smith was arrested on an exposure of sexual organs charge. a

Compiled by Devin D. O’Leary. Email your weird news to [email protected]. [8] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [9] CRIB NOTES OPINION | EDITORIAL BY AUGUST MARCH

Crib Notes: Dec. 18, 2014 1 What type of grant did the City of Albuquerque recently receive from Silence and Jokes a noted charitable organization? a) An “Innovation Team” grant from Bloomberg Philanthropies Bill Cosby and the culture of complicity b) A “spice” exploration and mining grant from CHOAM the ’80s and to no avail. His lawyers protected Cosby has a shady past, for the general public c) A nuclear weapons management BY GENEVIEVE MUELLER him, and his fan base didn’t know about it. to take notice. Buress’ refusal to remain silent grant from the US Air Force Since there wasn’t any public pressure, he about Cosby gave a voice to the victims. d) A surplus military gear purchase hen I started comedy, one of the first continued to work and also prey on women. This isn’t a unique story. Many powerful grant from Homeland Security things I noticed was that I was vastly Repeatedly, women would complain and come men are able to put mechanisms in place to outnumbered by men. The second thing forward. Yet their voices were either ignored or hide their sexual violence in the male- Last Sunday, an APD officer W 2 intentionally silenced. It took Buress—a male dominated comedy industry. About two ______. was that other female comics would tell me which man to avoid in a show. I’ve had plenty comedian with TV credits, a weekly, sold-out years ago, Gawker published a blind item a) Bought a dozen donuts and ate of female comics say, “Don’t stay in the green show in New York and a certain amount of saying a very well-known and famous them all room alone with that guy. He gets handsy.” It fame—finally proclaiming that, yes indeed, comedian forcefully kept two female comics b) Accidentally discharged his firearm, wounding an innocent floors me every single damn time, and yet it’s in his hotel room and made them watch him bystander become so frequent I find myself passing on masturbate. Gawker was looking for similar c) Renounced violence and sought that knowledge to the next gal. I don’t stories before they wrote a full-length article refuge in a local Sangha want to call comedy a boys club because exposing it. They tried to gather evidence, d) Dressed up in his favorite it isn’t. I’m a comic, and it belongs to but no one would come forward, and the military gear and paraded around the house me just as much as it belongs to my alleged victims refused to pursue it. Why? male peers. What I will say is that Gawker claims the two women were told by the male comedian’s powerful 3 Which local construction project in the entertainment industry, was recently (and gratefully) powerful men get away with manager to stop if they valued their completed? sexual assault at alarming rates, careers. and the comedy world is no In comedy, like other institutions, a) The illustrious pyramids near women are told to be quiet, to not be Downtown different. In a culture of silence b) Spaceport Albuquerque that protects powerful male alone with some men and most of c) The LexCorp Towers comics, predatory behavior all that if you talk, your career d) The I-25/Paseo del Norte flourishes. will be ruined. Powerful men like interchange On Oct.16 something Cosby are given free rein. The incredible happened. A comedy world hid these 4 A local poet felt pressured to resign voice was given to the allegations and protected Cosby from her teaching job at a Rio voiceless. Comedian for so long, and yet it was a joke Rancho high school after a student Hannibal Buress did a few that revealed it and exposed this complained about a piece of fiction jokes about Bill Cosby, noting alleged monster to the world. written by another student. The I think about being in that story concerned that although Cosby has ______. frequently critiqued the black green room in any venue in community, he has a troubled Albuquerque with that male a) Jesus and tequila history: More than a dozen comic who may get “handsy”—or b) Jesus and marijuana women have accused him of something worse—and it angers me c) Jesus and Buddha drugging them and assaulting more than anything. The only way d) Jesus, Mary and Joseph them over the past 30 years. to decimate systemic misogyny and The video of Buress’ set went a culture of abuse is for bookers and In order to attract more citizens to 5 viral, and more women have all comics, male and female, to give downtown Albuquerque, the city is planning to ______. come forward in the following no reverence to fame or talent when weeks. The fallout for we know assault is occurring. Do a) Hire violent bouncers to work in Cosby has been nuclear. not remain publicly silent while downtown clubs Venues canceled privately warning women to b) Provide free parking 24/7 avoid certain men. That c) Build an ice rink his live shows, d) Allow tours of the time travel NBC stopped solves nothing. devices hidden along Route 66 development on Instead, speak a sitcom, and TV Land out, refuse to canceled syndication on book, and stop Answers: the “The Cosby Show.” predators from 1) A. The City received the $1.2 million grant to Cosby’s victims finding sanctuary in address issues like job growth. have been trying to the comedy scene. a 2) B. The gun accidentally went off while the prosecute him since APD officer was investigating a break-in at a local apartment complex. 3) D. The $93 million highway project, which began in October 2013, was finally completed this past week. In the entertainment industry, powerful men get away 4) B. Katrina Guarascio faced administrative leave and was told that “she could either resign with sexual assault at alarming rates, and the comedy or write a plan describing how she would become more professional in the classroom.” world is no different. In a culture of silence that protects She chose the former. 5) C. The City is building a temporary ice rink powerful male comics, predatory behavior flourishes. that features artificial ice. a

[10 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI OPINION | ¡ASK A MEXICAN ! Special Navidad Gift Guide Edition! by the always impressive University of New BY GUSTAVO ARELLANO Mexico Press are pricey. But anyone who’s a student of New Mexico or a lover of Latino entle cabrones : Behold my music must own these tomes, annual Mexican Christmas which examine the unique G guide, where I recommend musical traditions of the Land the best Mexi-themed libros of Enchantment, featuring for you to give to your loved corridos that date back ones this Navidad instead of centuries. The latter comes yet another tamale to with a CD as well—you unwrap. Buy them at your remember those, right? local bookstore or order online, but do buy! Latina/os and World War II Mobility, Agency, and Lowriting: Shots, Rides & Ideology : The other great Stories from the Chicano Soul : university press for Chican@ Stunning collection of lowrider thought is the University of Texas photos by Los Angeles-based Press, and their best effort this year was librarian/photographer Art Meza combined this anthology regarding the Mexican- with essays and poems about Chicano car American experience in the Good War. Yes, culture (yours truly has a piece about my 1974 Ken Burns: Latinos fought in the conflict. Cadillac Eldorado convertible— pinche thing has more power than a B-17 Flying Fortress). The Changs Next Door to the Díazes: Publisher Santino Rivera also has another Remapping Race in Suburban : awesome anthology —¡Ban This! The BSP Released late last year by the University of Anthology of Xican@ Literature , published in Minnesota Press, this fluid ethnography response to the attack on ethnic studies in reveals the Reconquista for all its Arizona and beyond. Order them at nefariousness: Mexis are moving to the suburbs brokenswordpublications.com, and Rivera just and joining the middle class. Run! might throw in a sticker that pays homage to the Sex Pistols and reads “Never Mind the Paradise Transplanted: Migration and the Hispanics Here Come the Xicanos!” Hell ya! Making of California Gardens : University of Southern California sociology professor A Most Imperfect Union: A Contrarian Pierrette Hondagneu-Sotelo did a pioneering History of the United States : The latest study of Latina domestic workers in 2001, so it collaboration between essayist Ilan Stavans made sense that her followup in the genre and legendary cartoonista Lalo Alcaraz, this would focus on jardineros . Featuring her usual book is like a graphic-novel version of A trenchant analysis and a Studs Terkel ear for People’s History of the United States but far letting subjects tell their life story on their funnier. And don’t forget to buy all of Lalo’s own terms. books, as they remain evergreen gifts. ¡Ask a Mexican!, Orange County: A Speaking of Evergreens: Any of the works of Personal History and Taco USA: How Sam Quinones, Daniel Hernandez, Carey Mexican Food Conquered America : Because McWilliams, Jody Agius Vallejo and William duh! a Nericcio—each, in their own way, magnificent storytellers of the Mexican experience. Ask the Mexican at themexican@askamexican.. Hispanic Folk Music of New Mexico and the be his fan on Facebook. follow him on Twitter Southwest: A Self-Portrait of a People and @gustavoarellano or follow him on Instagram New Mexican Folk Music/Cancionero del @gustavo_arellano! Folklor Nuevomexicano: Treasures of a People/El Tesoro del Pueblo : Yes, these titles

WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [11 ] many cultures to enrich our experience of this season. Albuquerque Center for Peace and Justice Community (202 Harvard SE). 1:30 -3:30pm. 243 -6174. alibi.com/e/123642. Calendar FAMILY YOGA Practice yoga with the whole family. High Desert Yoga (4600 Copper NE). $12. 12:45 -1:45pm. 232 -9642. alibi.com/e/88834. GILDAN NEW MEXICO BOWL The game features the THURSDAY DEC 18 University of Texas-El Paso from the Mountain West Conference against Utah State University from BENTLEY ZUMBA Whether you’re a newcomer or Conference USA. University of New Mexico Athletic seasoned dancer, front row or back, everyone has a Department (1414 University SE). $25 -$40. great time in Zumba. Form Studio (3001 Monte 12:20pm. alibi.com/e/123754. Vista NE). $5. 5:45 -6:45pm. 730 -6122. GRAND OPENING OF THE STUDIO SPACE Check out the alibi.com/e/116573. space, which offers yoga, cooking and art classes. DROP-IN HOLIDAY CARD CRAFT Use recycled materials Refreshments, light samplings, a tour and more will be to make beautiful holiday cards for your loved ones. All previded. The Studio Space (7014 Cochiti SE). materials provided. East Mountain Library (1 Old Noon -3pm. (646) 872 -3418. alibi.com/e/122659. Tijeras, Tijeras). 3 -6pm. (505) 281 -8508. HOLIDAY ORNAMENT CRAFT Stop by and make an alibi.com/e/121819. ornament for your tree or any other holiday crafts. East ECRR BABY STORYTIME Join in for interactive stories, Mountain Library (1 Old Tijeras, Tijeras). 2 -5pm. (505) songs and bouncy rhymes. Alamosa Library 281 -8508. alibi.com/e/121824. (6900 Gonzales SW). 10:30 -11:30am. 836 -0684. LUCKY PAWS VAN ON THE MOVE Off-site pet adoption. alibi.com/e/107593. American Home (3535 Menual NE). 10am -4pm. ONE-ON-ONE COMPUTER CLASSES Learn basic 764 -1164. alibi.com/e/123565. computer skills. Main Library (501 Copper NW). MOVIE MATINEE This week’s showing is the film Rise of 2-3pm. 768 -5131. alibi.com/e/106151. the Guardians . Open Space Visitor Center RIVER OF LIGHTS Experience millions of sparkling lights (6500 Coors NW). 1:30 -3:30pm. 897 -8831. at New Mexico’s largest walk-through holiday alibi.com/e/123566. production. ABQ BioPark Botanic Garden NEW MEXICO CHILE BIKE TOUR Head into the streets of (2601 Central NW). $6 -$12, FREE for children under 3. Albuquerque to explore the flavorful red and green 6-9:30pm. 764 -6280. alibi.com/e/121043. chiles for which New Mexico is famous. Routes Bicycle STORY TIME Thirty-minute program of stories, songs, Tours and Rentals (404 San Felipe NW, #B1). poetry, puppets, jokes and finger plays for ages 3-6. $45 -$50. 10:30am -2pm. alibi.com/e/123764. Esther Bone Memorial Library (950 Pinetree SE, Rio PREGNANCY LOSS AND GRIEF SUPPORT GROUP A Rancho). 10am. 891 -5012. alibi.com/e/108983. support group of empathetic listeners for those who’ve TROLLEY OF LIGHTS Head out to see Albuquerque’s lost a pregnancy or child. Dar a Luz Birth & Health holiday lights aglow. ABQ Trolley Co. @ Hotel Center (7708 Fourth Street NW, Los Ranchos). 1 -3pm. Albuquerque at Old Town (800 Rio Grande NW). 924 -2229. alibi.com/e/70472. $12 -$20. 6:30pm. alibi.com/e/123757. RIVER OF LIGHTS $6 -$12, FREE for children under 3. YOGA CLASS: ALL LEVELS Hour-long yoga class 6-9:30pm. See 12/18 listing. combining Yin, Vinyasa and Restorative poses for the SANTA CLAWS PHOTOS & UGLY SWEATER CONTEST Take most effective hour of yoga you can have. Oriental your furry (or not) friends for holiday photos; all critters Medical Arts (2716 San Pedro NE). $15 -$40. and humans welcome. Boofy’s Best for Pets Noon -1pm, 6:30 -7:30pm. 506 -0136. (8201 Golf Course NW, #C-2). Donations accepted. alibi.com/e/123553. Noon -4pm. 890 -0757. alibi.com/e/123703. STRETCH & STRENGTH ON THE MAT Stretch and FRIDAY DEC 19 strengthen your entire body in this low-impact, results- driven, 55-minute classical pilates mat class. Form BALLET-AFRIQUE: COMMUNITY FUSION DANCE Studio (3001 Monte Vista NE). $12. Exuberantly graceful fusion of natural organic 11:30am -12:30pm. 918 -7684. alibi.com/e/105827. movement accented and embellished with line and SWEAT LODGE Purification in a safe environment with form, taught by Romy Keegan. Maple Street Dance trained professionals, like a sauna but with prayers Space (3215 Central NE). $15. 5:30 -7pm. 366 -4982. and a drum-and-song ceremony. The Kiva alibi.com/e/120043. (3096 Rosendo Garcia SW). $20. 7pm. 382 -5275. BEGINNING AFRICAN DANCE African dance for beginners alibi.com/e/108581. taught by Rujeko Dumbutshena. Rhythm Dance TALES FROM THE TRENCHES OF SOCIAL JUSTICE Veteran Company (3808 Central SE). $12 -$60. 5:30 -7pm. activist Allen Cooper shares 100 vintage political (718) 427 -0421. alibi.com/e/106853. justice posters on screen and gives a talk. HANDS-ONLY CPR TRAINING Learn this training for CPR. Albuquerque Center for Peace and Justice It could save a life. Fire Department Station 20 (202 Harvard SE). Donations accepted. 6 -8pm. (7520 Corona NE). 9 -11am. 833 -7300. 304 -3144. alibi.com/e/123412. alibi.com/e/123573. TRAIL WATCH TRAINING Join in to learn about becoming PILATES MAT Stretch and strengthen your entire body in a Trail Watch volunteer. Open Space Visitor Center this low-impact, results-driven, 55-minute classical (6500 Coors NW). 10am -1pm. 897 -8831. pilates mat class. All levels welcome. Form Studio alibi.com/e/123299. (3001 Monte Vista NE). $15. Noon. 918 -7684. TROLLEY OF LIGHTS $12 -$20. 6:30pm. See 12/18 alibi.com/e/105813. listing. RIVER OF LIGHTS $6 -$12, FREE for children under 3. COOKIE DECORATING CLASS: GINGERBREAD HOUSES 6-9:30pm. See 12/18 listing. Learn to decorate a gingerbread house, and take it SQUARE DANCE LESSONS Modern Western square dance home with you at the end of class. Rude Boy Cookies lessons. Casual dress. Couples or singles. (115 Harvard SE, #7). $35. 2 -4pm. 200 -2235. Albuquerque Square Dance Center alibi.com/e/123698. (4915 Hawkins NE). FREE for first two weeks, $60 HABANERO SALSA TASTING Join in for an exclusive after. 6:30 -8pm. 345 -9797. alibi.com/e/112681. product launch by Black Market Salsa as they present TROLLEY OF LIGHTS $12 -$20. 6:30pm. See 12/18 the follow-up to their award-winning fire roasted salsa. listing. Los Poblanos Historic Inn & Organic Farm (4803 Rio WINTER WONDER ACTIVITIES Enjoy special creative Grande NW). 11am -1pm. 344 -9297. activities in the Experiment Bar, make your own take- alibi.com/e/123774. home art object in the Woodworking Workshop and more. ¡Explora! (1701 Mountain NW). Included with admission. 3 -5:30pm. 224 -8300. SUNDAY DEC 21 alibi.com/e/122512. 4TH ANNUAL SANTA PAWS AND STRIPES Donations encouraged. 10am -2pm. See 12/20 listing. SATURDAY DEC 20 AFRICAN DANCE CLASS Intermediate African dance for dancers with some experience in any style. 4TH ANNUAL SANTA PAWS AND STRIPES One of the Enchantment Dancing Ballroom Studio (337 San largest adoption events of the year; get your photo Pedro NE). $12 -$15. 4 -5:30pm. (718) 427 -0421. taken with two- or four-legged family members and alibi.com/e/106870. enjoy goodies. PetSmart (1424 Mercantile NE). AFRODANSASANA YOGA/DANCE FUSION WORKSHOP An Donations encouraged. 10am -2pm. 999 -1201. exhilarating movement workshop fusing Afro- alibi.com/e/123525, alibi.com/e/123413. Caribbean dance with yoga asana. Body Motion CHRISTMAS TOY DRIVE A toy/food/clothing drive that will Studios (105 Jefferson NE). $15. 10:30am -noon. be accepting donations, as well as featuring music, 907 -9334. alibi.com/e/122358. discounts on piercings and more. Mijo’s Tattoos ALBU-CURVY YOGA Practice yoga postures that work for (1720 Juan Tabo NE). 2 -7pm. alibi.com/e/122957. all sizes and shapes. Form Studio (3001 Monte DIALOGUE: HOLIDAY PRACTICES Sharing traditions from [12 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI EVENT | PREVIEW

All of the Lights VIA WIKIPEDIA Part of the mystique of the holidays comes with driving down the streets, seeing numerous Santas on rooftops, balls of light coating picket fences and WEDNESDAY reindeer on lawns. So if driving through the city looking at Christmas lights DECEMBER 24 sounds like something you and the kiddos might be interested in, the Duke City Albuquerque has your Christmas Eve celebrations covered. You can start off with ABQ Convention Center RIDE’s 50th annual Luminaria Tour, which takes folks through the Old Town 401 Second Street NW and Country Club neighborhoods. That happens Christmas Eve from 5:30 to alibi.com/e/120736 7:20pm and takes off from the Albuquerque Convention Center (401 Second 5:30 to 7:20pm Street NW). Tour times vary, and prices range from $1.70 to $3. Not bad, eh? If you feel like traveling beyond the city limits (but still have some bright lights vvvvv and luminarias in mind), head to the Sky City Cultural Center at Acoma Pueblo (I-40, Exit 102) for their Christmas Eve Luminaria celebration. Featuring over 2,000 of these light-filled treasures, follow them to the Acoma Pueblo. That’s a mere $5 and starts at 6pm. Lastly, you can hop on your bicycle and follow the staff from Routes Bicycle Tours and Rentals in Old Town (404 San Felipe NW) to see some of the most stunning light displays in the state of New Mexico. This Lights and Luminarias Holiday Bicycle Tour happens Christmas Eve at 5, 6:45 and 8pm. Tickets go for $18 for adults and $15 for children (bike rental included). But if you feel like taking your own bicycle, the BYO-Bike tickets go for $15 (adults) and $10 (for the young’uns). Tickets for this one are selling fast, so get ‘em while they’re available. Merry Christmas! (Mark Lopez) a

Vista NE). $12, first class FREE. 7 -8pm. 730 -6122. 6-9:30pm. See 12/18 listing. alibi.com/e/102742. TRAVELIN’ JACK’S HOWL-I-DAY Fundraiser to save Lucky ALBUQUERQUE BIKE & BREW TOUR Sample and learn Paws. Lucky Paws Adoption Center (6600 Menaul NE). about Albuquerque’s top microbrews, take in beautiful Noon -4pm. 764 -1164. alibi.com/e/123558. scenery, and meet new people in the process. Routes TROLLEY OF LIGHTS $12 -$20. 6:30pm. See 12/18 Bicycle Tours and Rentals (404 San Felipe NW, #B1). listing. $45. 1 -4:30pm. 933 -5667. alibi.com/e/123526. YULE GATHERING Join in and celebrate as the Goddess ALL-AGES ECSTATIC DANCE Join Elizabeth Cervantes and gives birth to the God. Abitha’s Apothecary Melissa McLamb for a family-friendly holiday dance. (3906 Central SE). 7 -8pm. 262 -0401. Studio Sway (1100 San Mateo NE). $10, children by alibi.com/e/115671. donation. 3 -4:30pm. 710 -5096. alibi.com/e/120425. MONDAY DEC 22 ANNUAL WINTER SOLSTICE SEED MANDALA Help construct a mandala made of seeds to feed songbirds AFRO-CUBAN FOLKLORIC DANCE Join in and feel the and other migratory wildlife. Open Space Visitor power and joy of drum, dance and song. Maple Street Center (6500 Coors NW). 11am -1pm. 897 -8831. Dance Space (3215 Central NE). $12. 5:45pm. alibi.com/e/121829. 889 -5386. alibi.com/e/120093. FREE QIGONG SOLSTICE RITUAL An evening of Qigong RIVER OF LIGHTS $6 -$12, FREE for children under 3. specifically tailored to the energetic and spiritual 6-9:30pm. See 12/18 listing. attributes of this important turning of the cosmic Qi. WINTER DAY CAMP 2014 With a different theme each MogaDao Institute (701 Camina de la Familia, day, students have the opportunity to explore many Santa Fe). 6 -8pm. 690 -1928. alibi.com/e/122291. facets of science, technology, engineering and math. HALF-MARATHON & 10K TRAINING PROGRAM Expert National Museum of Nuclear Science and History instruction, education and personalized attention will (601 Eubank SE). $49.50 -$55 per day, registration inspire you to cross the finish line. You! Inspired required. 9am -4pm. 245 -2137. alibi.com/e/123664. Fitness (1761 Bellamah NW). $119 -$169. 7am. 489 -9484. alibi.com/e/115696. TUESDAY DEC 23 LYME GET TOGETHER Could it be Lyme? Head to this Lyme Disease support group. Noon -4pm. 304 -9411. BALLET-AFRIQUE: COMMUNITY FUSION DANCE $15. alibi.com/e/123722. 5:30 -7pm. See 12/19 listing. MEDITATION FOR KIDS Children learn how to build a BASIC COMPUTER TRAINING Learn computer skills with space of inner strength and confidence by developing one-on-one instruction. Alamosa Library their good qualities. Kadampa Meditation Center (6900 Gonzales SW). 10 -11am. 836 -0684. (8701 Comanche NE). $3 per child suggested alibi.com/e/107612. donation. 10 -11:30am. 292 -5293. BEGINNER SQUARE DANCE LESSONS Fun and easy alibi.com/e/121517. square dance lessons for singles, couples and MINNESOTA VIKINGS FAN CLUB Join fellow Minnesota families with kids. Albuquerque Square Dance Center Vikings fans to celebrate their favorite team and root (4915 Hawkins NE). $30, FREE for children. them on. The Fox and Hound (4301 The Lane at I-25). 6:30 -8pm. 898 -4609. alibi.com/e/113408. 11am. 344 -9430. alibi.com/e/109448. CATAPULTS REVISITED! Revisit the catapults the library’s PRAYERS FOR WORLD PEACE Bring more peace and group made over the summer. Juan Tabo Public Library happiness into our world by learning to cherish others, (3407 Juan Tabo NE). 2 -3pm. 291 -6260. overcome anger and deal with stress. Kadampa alibi.com/e/121834. Meditation Center (8701 Comanche NE). FLOWER’S 2ND ANNUAL BAH HUMBUG SOCIAL & LAST- 10 -11:30am. 505 -292 -9=5293. alibi.com/e/121513. Community Calendar continues on page 14 RIVER OF LIGHTS $6 -$12, FREE for children under 3. WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [13 ] and fingerplays. Birth to 2 (pre-talkers). Los Griegos Community Calendar continued from page 13 Library (1000 Griegos NW). 11:15am -12:15pm. 761 -4020. alibi.com/e/106366. MINUTE SHOPPING EVENT Featuring dinner and BALLET-AFRIQUE: COMMUNITY FUSION DANCE $15. beverages, specials, discounts, collection barrels and 5:30 -7pm. See 12/19 listing. donation jars from local animal rescue groups. Boofy’s BEGINNING BELLY DANCE Course is designed for Best for Pets (8201 Golf Course NW, #C-2). Donations students to grow at a measured pace while learning accepted. 6 -9pm. 890 -0757. alibi.com/e/123712. the fundamentals of belly dance. Maple Street Dance INTRO TO BALLET-AFRIQUE: COMMUNITY FUSION Studio (Alley Entrance) (3215 Central). $10 per class. DANCE Gracefully exuberant movement taught by 5:35 -6:25pm. 453 -9934. alibi.com/e/111287. Romy Keegan, with live percussion by Jefferson CHRISTMAS EVE LUMINARIAS All visitors are welcome to Voorhees. Maple Street Dance Space experience this Christmas Eve tradition as 2,000 (3215 Central NE). $15 per class. 5:30 -7pm. luminarias light the way to Acoma Pueblo. Sky City 366 -4982. alibi.com/e/117928. Cultural Center (Pueblo of Acoma, I-40, Exit 102, MELLOW YOGA This is the class especially for baby Acoma). $5. 6pm. alibi.com/e/123765. boomers, office workers and people who aren’t as CHRISTMAS EVE SERVICE Let your light shine at this active as they’d like to be. Form Studio (3001 Monte special service. High Desert Center for Spiritual Living Vista NE). $12 -$100. 7 -8pm. 433 -8685. (5621 Paradise NW). Love offering. 5:30 -6:30pm. alibi.com/e/107182. 836 -9505. alibi.com/e/123663. PINT FOR PINT BLOOD DRIVE The bar gives away a pint ECRR PRESCHOOL STORYTIME Join in every Wednesday glass and a voucher for $4.50 that can be used 24 for stories, rhymes, fingerplays, crafts and more. Ages hours after donation. Marble Brewery Westside Tap 3-5. South Valley Public Library (3904 Isleta SW). Room (5740 Night Whisper NW). 4 -8pm. 10:15 -11:15am. 877 -5170. alibi.com/e/106297. alibi.com/e/123609. ECRR PRESCHOOL STORYTIME Erna Fergusson Library RIVER OF LIGHTS $6 -$12, FREE for children under 3. (3700 San Mateo NE). 10:15 -11:15am. See previous 6-9:30pm. See 12/18 listing. listing. WINTER DAY CAMP 2014 $49.50 -$55 per day, ECRR PRESCHOOL STORYTIME North Valley Public registration required. 9am -4pm. See 12/22 listing. Library (7704 Second Street NW). 11am -noon. See YOGA BASICS AND FUNDAMENTALS WITH KENDRA The previous listing. perfect class series for complete newcomers to the art LIGHTS & LUMINARIAS HOLIDAY BICYCLE TOUR Head and science of yoga or for those who want to refine down luminaria-lined avenues in Old Town and past their alignment and poses. Studio Sway (1100 San some of the most impressive light displays in the Mateo NE). $10. Noon -1pm. 710 -5096. state. Routes Bicycle Tours and Rentals (404 San alibi.com/e/117479. Felipe NW, #B1). $10 -$18. 5pm, 6:45pm, 8pm. alibi.com/e/121840. WEDNESDAY DEC 24 SENIOR YOGA This gentle class helps seniors build and ABQ RIDE’S 50TH ANNUAL LUMINARIA TOUR retain muscle tone, range of motion and balance. Travel through Old Town and Country Form Studio (3001 Monte Vista NE). $10 -$80. Club neighborhoods on this 45-minute 1:15 -2:15pm. 433 -8685. alibi.com/e/107268. luminaria tour. Albuquerque Convention TASTY WEDNESDAYS: SWEET AND SPICY PECANS Join in Center (401 Second Street NW). for culinary ideas for this healthy and local treat, as $1.70 -$3. 5:30 -7:20pm. 768 -4575. well as a bit of history on the pecan farm and its alibi.com/e/120736. See preview box. importance. Los Poblanos Historic Inn & Organic Farm BABY STORYTIME Help your child develop early literacy (4803 Rio Grande NW). $5. 2pm. 344 -9297. skills in a fun environment using books, rhymes, songs alibi.com/e/123766. a

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WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [15 ] BOOK REVIEW ARTS | FEATURE BY ERIK GAMLEM S E U N E V

Boom For Real E H T

F O

Jennifer Clement’s Widow Basquiat: A Y S

Love Story (Broadway Books, paperback, $16) E T R U

Jean-Michel Basquiat died while the O C

influence of his work had yet to be established. S E G

Known as SAMO, a pioneering graffiti writer in A M Lower East Side Manhattan in the early 1980s, I his success unfolded as an unlikely rags-to- riches story while he moved from scripting idiosyncratic messages on city streets to bold and confrontational paintings in high-end galleries. Basquiat combined crude images with Guild Cinema Low Sprits Imbibe text that commented on culture, race, history and often death. Following Basquiat’s death in 1988 at the age of 27 from a heroin overdose, many critics, The 9 Best Comedy Venues in ABQ filmmakers, biographers and even other artists tried to own the narrative. They wanted to Montoya and Kristin Berg, the theater is says, “It’s a great theater, it has a great staff, create the legacy of Basquiat in the image of the BY GENEVIEVE MUELLER primarily an improv space with their troupes and it is always a fun room.” “Radiant Child,” as critic Rene Ricard famously THE SHOW and Comedy? selling out weekly Show times vary, $5-$10 dubbed him. But those stories were always too ’ve been writing about comedy for about a shows. Twice a month, comics take over with meager, often willfully omitting Basquiat’s year and a half now, and as such I’ve gone to stand-up shows. Comedian Mary Byrd says, Imbibe insecurity, his violent and arrogant temperament I every single comedy venue in town. Every “It’s a great stage with an intimate 3101 Central NE and the complexities of race, sexuality and AIDS single one. So when I give the full disclosure environment, made for comedy.” A comedy imbibenobhill.com, 255-4200 during the grab-all culture of the 1980s. By that this list has been entirely generated by me space where you’re always guaranteed a good It’s pretty hard to get paid for comedy in unraveling Basquiat’s romance with Suzanne and is absolutely and completely subjective, crowd, this is probably one of the more all- Albuquerque. But some visionaries in our Mallouk, the woman he affectionately referred to know that it comes from a place of serious and scene have figured out how to create DIY as “Venus,” Jennifer Clement’s Widow Basquiat: ages-friendly venues in town. vetted ABQ comedy knowledge. Readers, Show times vary, $5-$10 venues and get cash flowing to performers. A Love Story presents an indictment of the One of the most successful at this is Dawn many narrow caricatures that exist of the artist. you’re in good hands. My hands. In fairness, I Schary. She runs Carpe Diem Comedy at Instead of mapping a sequential timeline, did ask for feedback from some local comics Nexus Clement presents the lovers’ history using poetic but purely to support what I felt in my heart. 4730 Pan American Fwy NE Imbibe every first Thursday of the month. prose and augments it with Mallouk’s anecdotes. Albuquerque boasts a diverse assortment of nexusbrewery.com, 242-4100 Local comics and touring comics not only get After a troubled and violent past, Mallouk flees comedy spaces and shows. Make your 2015 John Cuellar, Eddie Stephens and AJ paid to do comedy here, but it’s a great room her home for New York and is soon charmed by resolution to support local comedy, and I Martinez run the Young, Dumb and Full of that looks like the inside of a neon whale. And the burgeoning street artist. Their love affair is promise when I see you out there, I’ll give you Comedy open mic at Nexus every Tuesday. their fish taco special is killer. tumultuous, surrounded by all the excess New a good tickle in your funny bone. In no Another comic favorite, this open mic offers First Thursday of the month, FREE York has to offer. As Basquiat’s fame rises so do particular order, the following are the best chicken and waffles, good beer and a crowd of his insecurities, and his feelings toward Mallouk places in Albuquerque to catch live comedy. unsuspecting people who didn’t know they The Stage at Santa Ana begin to run and cold. During one of their stumbled onto a very good time. One of the Casino many breakups, Basquiat tells Mallouk he Broken Bottle Brewery best comedy open mics for nearly three years 54 Jemez Dam Rd., Bernalillo doesn’t love her anymore and calls her a “white 9421 Coors NW running, Young and Dumb always finds a way thestageatthestar.com, 771-5353 Arab piece of shit.” Later, trying to woo her, he brokenbottlebrewery.com, 890-8777 to win the crowd over and set them up for Technically Albuquerque-adjacent, the invites her to his loft, filled with flowers and This little brewery offers the only comedy Stage is arguably the best local place to see pastries. With his paintings selling for handfuls of some stellar comedy—and there’s chicken and on Albuquerque’s Westside. The weekly open touring headliners . They bring in top-tier cash, the artist spends indiscriminately on drugs, waffles. Come for the chicken and waffles, and mic hosted by Sarah Mowrey and Nick Muñez fine dining and lavish clothes he’ll destroy while stay for the dick jokes. comedians on a weekly basis and feature at working. But none of this is what captures has been going strong for two years. It’s one of Tuesdays at 7pm, FREE least one local comic. With its layout and Mallouk. Her love for Basquiat remains the only open mics in town where most of the frequency of shows, this venue is a dream for unwavering even in the wake of his ego, infidelity audience knows a comedy show happens and Low Spirits comics. While enjoying fantastic food and and abuse. deliberately comes for that reason. (Seriously, 2823 Second Street NW drink specials, audiences can catch comedians Despite being surrounded by lovers and it makes a difference.) Mowrey and Muñez are lowspiritslive.com, 344-9555 who wouldn’t otherwise come through New admirers, it’s clear Basquiat only trusted a few fantastic hosts and know how to keep the Low Spirits is probably Albuquerque’s best- Mexico. people very close to him. Art-world peers, night’s long list of signed-up comics moving kept comedy secret. This dive bar is home to Every Thursday at 7pm, $10 gallery owners and tagalongs seeking quickly. And the beer is so good. AnarKomedy hosted by Ann Gora and authenticity clung to the young artist, boasting Wednesdays at 7:30pm, FREE produced by Kevin Kennedy. The once-a- Secret Location� of his genius. Other narrators often got caught month show features incredible bang for your “secret address ” up in the myth-making, but Clement takes care to Back Alley Draft House buck. Sporting 10 to 20 comics booked at a facebook.com/comedy505 include detailed portraits of Basquiat’s true inner 215 Central NW time, it’s an insane marathon of comedy and Here’s another full disclosure: This last circle. His assistant Shenge Ka Pharaoh, graffiti 766-8590 mayhem. With the ever-irreverent Gora at the venue is where I host a show called artist Rammellzee and early No Wave art curator When I posted on Facebook asking comics to helm, audiences are ensured a good time and Comedians’ Power Hour with my comedy Diego Cortez are presented as bright portraits, tell me their favorite spot, Back Alley won by partner Drew Wayne. To be completely their contributions and influence on the artist’s some solidly absurd and shocking comedy. a landslide. This open mic is hosted by the transparent, I asked Facebook what they life included in full instead of being relegated to Show times vary, $6 very funny Drew Wayne and is one of the murky composites or completely discarded as thought, and the comics agreed that this once- they have been elsewhere. newer comedy venues. With its low ceiling, Guild Cinema a-month show is one of the best in town ... 3405 Central NE Basquiat was terribly aware of the lore being brick wall and ideal close table seating, Back and not just because they’re all my friends. constructed about his life and art career; Alley is the perfect setup for comedy. “It’s right guildcinema.com, 255-1848 The show is half drinking contest, half comedy Clement writes of his disdain for how others tried in that spot of town where anybody can just The Guild, run by Keif Henley, offers indie contest. Featuring insane competitions, it’s run to own his story. “They don’t invent a childhood stumble in,” says Allen Clark. “And no matter films you can’t see anywhere else, performance like that old Nickelodeon show “Double for white artists,” Basquiat lamented. Widow what the comedians say, they still allow us art pieces by incredible artists like Crispin Dare.” To get into this comedy show you have Basquiat is too bare and too raw to be the back every week.” Glover, live recording of podcasts like RISK! to be invited, know someone who is invited or invention of imagination, too painful to be a fable Mondays at 7pm, FREE by Kevin Allison and brilliant comedy by the be booked for it. A little bird (it was Drew) written by spectators. Clement includes not just likes of Cracked editor Adam Tod Brown. The told me that next month’s show will have a the “Radiant Child” but the scars and vicissitude The Box Guild is one the best overall venues for film major headliner. To find out more about this of an extraordinary life. Widow Basquiat is as 110 Gold SW and performance. Henley is great at making it show, like the Albuquerque Comedy page on real a story about the man, not just the artist, as theboxabq.com, 404-1578 accessible to touring and local comics. Matt Facebook and find the event listed. one could tell. a The Box is a comic favorite. Run by Doug Peterson, who sometimes hosts shows there, Every first Thursday, FREE a

[16 ] DECEMBER 18-24, 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [17 ] alibi.com/e/120207. ALBUQUERQUE LITTLE THEATRE White Christmas . Arts & Lit $12 -$24. 7:30pm. See 12/18 listing. AUX DOG THEATRE Christmas at the Yucca Vista . This Calendar year join The Dolls for all the crazy antics at the Yucca Vista Trailer Park for a Christmas you won’t soon forget. Runs through 12/21. $16 -$20. 8 -10pm. THURSDAY DEC 18 254 -7716. alibi.com/e/121732. BOX PERFORMANCE SPACE AND IMPROV THEATRE A WORDS Charlie Brown Christmas . Based on the Peabody- BOOKWORKS Holiday Story Time . Celebrate the holiday winning animated cartoon from 1965, see the season with Contessa Connie. 10:30am. 344 -8139. Peanuts gang live and on stage. Runs through 12/21. alibi.com/e/123767. $10. 6pm. alibi.com/e/122993. Also, THE SHOW . THE SOURCE DimeStories Open Mic for Prose . Live comedy and improv. $8 -$10. 9 -10pm. Albuquerque’s only open mic exclusively for prose, alibi.com/e/122282. See “Arts Feature.” Also, specifically for 3-minute stories read by the author. Comedy? High energy, fast-moving and hilarious, $3. 7pm. 228 -2356. alibi.com/e/66729. Comedy? is Albuquerque’s alternative comedy troupe. ART $6. 10:30pm -11:45am. 404 -1578. PATINA GALLERY , Santa Fe New Works Opening alibi.com/e/65104. See “Arts Feature.” Reception . New art pieces by Claire Kahn. Runs CELL THEATRE All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front through 12/20. 5 -7pm. (505) 986 -3432. Teeth . $7 -$22. 8 -9pm. See 12/18 listing. alibi.com/e/123647. DESERT ROSE PLAYHOUSE Christmas the Musical . STAGE Featuring music and skits from Christmas stories past and present. Runs through 12/21. $10 -$12. ALBUQUERQUE LITTLE THEATRE White Christmas . This 8-10pm. 803 -5410. alibi.com/e/122372. merry musical tells the story of Bob Wallace and Phil Davis, two famous song-and-dance men. Runs THE DOOR CHRISTIAN CHURCH A Charlie Brown through 12/24 $12 -$24. 7:30pm. 242 -4750. Christmas REUNION...25 Years Later . The Peanuts alibi.com/e/121928. gang gets together for a weekend reunion 25 years after they first discovered the meaning of Christmas. CELL THEATRE All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Runs through 12/21. 7 -9pm. 362 -6990. Teeth . Catherine Bush’s play about a young girl who alibi.com/e/123613. discovers the meaning of Christmas after landing a role in her school’s Christmas show. Runs through HEIGHTS CHRISTIAN CHURCH Ebenezer Scrooge . 12/21. $7 -$22. 8 -9pm. 797 -7081. $8 -$12. 7 -9pm. See 12/18 listing. alibi.com/e/118847. SKYLIGHT , Santa Fe The Lulz Comedy Show . Featuring HEIGHTS CHRISTIAN CHURCH Ebenezer Scrooge . comedians Andy Sell, Mary Byrd, Yedoye Travis, Casey Narrow Gate Theater presents this production Haymes, Luke Henley and Lexy McAvinchey. $10. featuring original music and lyrics by Dennis Cole and 8-10pm. alibi.com/e/123414. Lara Moore. Runs through 12/21. $8 -$12. 7 -9pm. TRICKLOCK PERFORMANCE LABORATORY The Last 259 -1282. alibi.com/e/122906. Night of Ballyhoo . $20 -$22. 8pm. See 12/18 listing. KIMO THEATRE The Nutcracker: Student Matinee . Ballet THE VORTEX THEATRE A Christmas Carol . $15 -$22. Repertory Theatre continues their beloved holiday 7:30pm. See 12/18 listing. tradition of bringing this family classic to the stage. SONG & DANCE Runs through 12/24. $5. 10 -11:30am. 768 -3544. EL MUSEO CULTURAL DE SANTA FE , Santa Fe alibi.com/e/122233. Chuscales Gypsy Passion . $30. 7:30 -10pm. See THE STAGE @ SANTA ANA STAR , Bernalillo 12/18 listing. Stand-Up Comedy Thursday . Featuring LORETTO CHAPEL , Santa Fe A Baroque Christmas . three of the country’s best stand-up Featuring the Santa Fe Pro Musica Baroque Ensemble comedians: Jose Sarduy, Jessica and mezzo-sopranos Deborah Domanski and Drea Michelle Singleton and Wolfman. $10. Pressley. $20 -$65. 6pm, 8pm. (505) 982 -0092. 7:30pm. alibi.com/e/123755. See “Arts alibi.com/e/123648. Feature.” NATIONAL HISPANIC CULTURAL CENTER The TRICKLOCK PERFORMANCE LABORATORY The Last Nutcracker Ballet in the Land of Night of Ballyhoo . Alfred Uhry’s play focuses on Enchantment . Featuring choreography by Atlanta’s Freitag family in 1939 as they are pulled Patricia Dickinson Wells and a full live apart and brought back together. Runs through orchestra under the baton of Guillermo 12/28. $20 -$22. 8pm. alibi.com/e/121939. Figueroa. $14 -$47. 7pm. 724 -4771. THE VORTEX THEATRE A Christmas Carol . Dickens’ classic alibi.com/e/121742. See preview box. story comes to the stage, during which Ebenezer OUTPOST PERFORMANCE SPACE The Nutcracker Scrooge learns the value of Christmas. Runs through (Swing!) . Concordia Santa Fe’s production includes 12/21. $12. 7:30pm. 247 -8600. the performance of Duke Ellington/Billy Strayhorn’s alibi.com/e/122029. “Nutcracker Suite for Jazz Band.” $18 -$30. 7 -9pm. SONG & DANCE 913 -7211. alibi.com/e/123021. EL MUSEO CULTURAL DE SANTA FE , Santa Fe POPEJOY HALL , UNM Center for the Arts An Irish Chuscales Gypsy Passion . Chuscales, the celebrated Christmas . Celebrate the rich traditions of Ireland with flamenco guitarist, puts on a special show with Kevin Horton (Riverdance) and Magic of the Dance Alejandro Pais, Nicholas Cordova, singer Kina Mendez alums Claran Maguire and Collette Dunn. $20 -$54. and more. $30. 7:30 -10pm. 577 -8015. 8-10pm. 925 -5858. alibi.com/e/118491. alibi.com/e/120457. RODEY THEATRE , Popejoy Hall 16th Annual Recital TEATRO PARAGUAS , Santa Fe A Musical Piñata for Navideño . Join the National Institute of Flamenco, Christmas II . A bilingual festival of music, dance and Niños Flamencos and Alma Flamenca to celebrate comedy. $5 -$20 suggested donation. 7pm. (505) their hard work and accomplishments. $20 -$25. 424 -1601. alibi.com/e/123643. 7pm. 242 -7600. alibi.com/e/123539. ST. THERESE CHURCH Albuquerque Philharmonic Orchestra . Winter-themed music with guest conductor FRIDAY DEC 19 Wojciech Milewski. Donations accepted. 7:30pm. ART alibi.com/e/123761. APPALOOSA ART SPACE All You Can Art Night . Join in for TEATRO PARAGUAS , Santa Fe A Musical Piñata for an “all you can art buffet,” where all participants have Christmas II . $5 -$20 suggested donation. 7pm. See free reign in the painting lab and drawing studio. $10. 12/18 listing. 4-8pm. 503 -1141. alibi.com/e/121972. FILM PATINA GALLERY , Santa Fe New Works . (505) JEAN COCTEAU CINEMA , Santa Fe Friday Filmmakers 986 -3432. alibi.com/e/124014. Coffee . A get-together for professional filmmakers who STAGE are actively working in the industry in New Mexico. ADOBE THEATER Forbidden Broadway’s Greatest Hits . 3-6pm. alibi.com/e/123640. Gerard Alessandrini’s funny play pays entertaining KIMO THEATRE A Christmas Story (1983) . tribute to some of the theater’s greatest stars and Classic film about 9-year-old Ralphie and songwriters. Runs through 12/28. $13 -$15. 7:30pm. what he wants for Christmas: a BB gun. 898 -9222. alibi.com/e/121915. $4 -$8. 8 -9:30pm. 768 -3544. AFRICAN AMERICAN PERFORMING ARTS CENTER , Expo alibi.com/e/122277. See “Reel World.” NM Shrek the Musical . The Oscar-winning DreamWorks film heads to the stage, featuring SATURDAY DEC 20 everyone’s favorite ogre. Runs through 12/28. WORDS $15 -$22. 7:30 -10pm. 265 -9119. TREASURE HOUSE BOOKS , Old Town A Brother’s Cold [18 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI EVENT | PREVIEW A Nutcracker Navidad Aside from a hot bowl of green chile stew, few FRIDAY things warm DECEMBER 19 the holiday National Hispanic heart like a Cultural Center fine rendition 1701 Fourth Street SW of The alibi.com/e/121742 Nutcracker . 7pm Pair some staples of New Mexico culture and the beloved Christmas ballet, and the results can be magical. That’s the idea behind Nutcracker in the Land of Enchantment , an adaption of the Tchaikovskian classic served up with a fiery Southwestern kick. Presented by choreographer Patricia Dickinson Wells and artistic director of the Figueroa Music and Arts Project Guillermo Figueroa, the production begins Friday, Dec. 19, at the National Hispanic Cultural Center (1701 Fourth Street SW). Forgoing snowy Germany for territorial New Mexico in the latter part of the 19th century, the narrative details of E.T.A. Hoffmann’s 1816 story stay mostly intact: With the aid of a dreaming child, an animated doll stabs an overgrown rodent to death. Festivities commence. The Stahlbaum family, however, is replaced by the Pacheco clan; flamenco dancing is interwoven with traditional Russian ballet; and snakes, piñon forests and Victorian-era settlers’ garb add to the New Mexican feel. Accompanied by a full orchestra, the three-day run includes five performances as part of this year’s Festival Ballet Albuquerque. Friday thru Sunday, 7pm; Saturday and Sunday, 2pm. $14 to $47. (Sam Adams) a

Case . A reading and signing with writer Dennis Herrick. 7:30 -10pm. 377 -9593. alibi.com/e/119455. 1-3pm. 242 -7204. HEIGHTS CHRISTIAN CHURCH Ebenezer Scrooge . ART $8 -$12. 7 -9pm. See 12/18 listing. CENTRAL FEATURES Holiday Party and Closing KIMO THEATRE The Nutcracker . $7 -$27. 2pm, 7 -9pm. Reception . Celebrate the season by seeing the See 12/18 listing. Mandala and Carte Blanche exhibits before they SKYLIGHT , Santa Fe Dark is the Night Circus . Featuring close. 6 -8pm. alibi.com/e/123461. gravity-defying aerial performances, exquisite OLD SAN YSIDRO CHURCH , Corrales Indigenous Fine Art acrobatics, wandering jugglers and towering stilt- Market Pop-up Show . Featuring several talented and walkers. $15 -$25. 7 -9pm. 992 -2588. diverse Native artists: Tonya June Rafael (jewelry), alibi.com/e/123349. Gabe Sice (sculpture), Ricardo Lee Cate (painting) TRICKLOCK PERFORMANCE LABORATORY The Last Night and more. 5 -7:30pm. alibi.com/e/123375. of Ballyhoo . $20 -$22. 8pm. See 12/18 listing. PATINA GALLERY , Santa Fe New Works . See 12/19 THE VORTEX THEATRE A Christmas Carol . $15 -$22. listing. 7:30pm. See 12/18 listing. UNSEEN GALLERY Unseen Gallery Christmas Party . SONG & DANCE Featuring homemade goodies, eggnog, hot chocolate EL MUSEO CULTURAL DE SANTA FE , Santa Fe Chuscales and reproductions of Maxfield Parrish, Gonsalves, Gypsy Passion . $30. 7:30 -10pm. See 12/18 listing. Bauman, Erte and more. 10am -4pm. 232 -2161. LORETTO CHAPEL , Santa Fe A Baroque Christmas . alibi.com/e/124181. $20 -$65. 6pm, 8pm. See 12/19 listing. STAGE NATIONAL HISPANIC CULTURAL CENTER The Nutcracker ADOBE THEATER Forbidden Broadway’s Greatest Hits . Ballet in the Land of Enchantment . $14 -$47. 2pm, $13 -$15. 7:30pm. See 12/19 listing. 7pm. See 12/19 listing. AFRICAN AMERICAN PERFORMING ARTS CENTER , Expo POPEJOY HALL , UNM Center for the Arts Home for the NM Shrek the Musical . $15 -$22. 7:30 -10pm. See Holidays Pops! Thomas Wilkins conducts the New 12/19 listing. Mexico Philharmonic alongside the Manzano Day ALBUQUERQUE LITTLE THEATRE White Christmas . School and Bosque School choirs. $20 -$68. 6 -8pm. $12 -$24. 7:30pm. See 12/18 listing. 925 -5858. alibi.com/e/112579. ARMORY FOR THE ARTS THEATER , Santa Fe Clan Tynker RODEY THEATRE , Popejoy Hall 16th Annual Recital Presents: The Dream Train . An amazing menagerie of Navideño . $20 -$25. 7pm. See 12/19 listing. entertainment from “around the world” set to a lively SOUTH BROADWAY CULTURAL CENTER A Holiday musical soundscape. $10 -$12. 2 -4pm, 7 -9pm. (800) Celebration! The Albuquerque Civic Chorus celebrates 838 -3006. alibi.com/e/117057. 81 years of performance with an eclectic selection of AUX DOG THEATRE Christmas at the Yucca Vista . holiday tunes from sacred to laugh-out-loud silly. $10, $16 -$20. 8 -10pm. See 12/19 listing. FREE for children under 5. 7 -9pm. 989 -6611. BOX PERFORMANCE SPACE AND IMPROV THEATRE A alibi.com/e/121004. Charlie Brown Christmas . $10. 2pm, 6pm. See 12/19 ST. MICHAEL AND ALL ANGELS EPISCOPAL CHURCH So listing. Also, THE SHOW . $8 -$10. 9 -10pm. See 12/19 Merrily the Shepherds Sang . A concert of rarely-heard listing. Also, Bad Penguin Comedy Show! A variety medieval and Renaissance Christmas music, show with comedians Will Bolt, Drew Wayne and performed with voices and period instruments. Genevieve Mueller. $7. 10:30 -11:30pm. 404 -1578. $9 -$16. 7:30pm. 345 -8148. alibi.com/e/123641. alibi.com/e/122310. TEATRO PARAGUAS , Santa Fe A Musical Piñata for CELL THEATRE All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Christmas II . $5 -$20 suggested donation. 7pm. See Teeth . $7 -$22. 8 -9pm. See 12/18 listing. 12/18 listing. DESERT ROSE PLAYHOUSE Christmas the Musical . LEARN $10 -$12. 8 -10pm. See 12/19 listing. THE BIRD’S SONG ART & JEWELRY SHOP Silversmithing THE DOOR CHRISTIAN CHURCH A Charlie Brown and Pottery Painting Demo . Tony Chino and Lee Ray Christmas REUNION...25 Years Later . 7 -9pm. See demonstrate their skills. 11am -4pm. 503 -6376. 12/19 listing. alibi.com/e/123518. FOUL PLAY CAFE , Sheraton Uptown Noir Point Blank . Dinner theater featuring a detective looking for a murderess and a gangster on the lam. $57. Arts & Lit Calendar continues on page 2 0 WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [19 ] LEARN Arts &Lit Calendar continued from page 19 THE BIRD’S SONG ART & JEWELRY SHOP Silversmithing FILM and Pottery Painting Demo . 11am -4pm. See 12/20 GUILD CINEMA Dark Matters presents: listing. Horror Bites! Celebrate the darkest day of the year with a collection of short MONDAY DEC 22 films, including science fiction, horror STAGE and dark fantasy. $5 -$15. 4 -10pm. BACK ALLEY DRAFT HOUSE Comedy Open 255 -1848. alibi.com/e/124223. See Mic . See some live comedy at this open “Reel World.” mic hosted by Drew Wayne. 7pm. alibi.com/e/124225. See “Arts Feature.” SUNDAY DEC 21 SONG & DANCE WORDS LORETTO CHAPEL , Santa Fe A Baroque Christmas . $20 -$65. 6pm, 8pm. See 12/19 listing. TREASURE HOUSE BOOKS , Old Town Malignancy . A reading and signing with writer J.L. Greger. 12:30 -3pm. 242 -7204. alibi.com/e/117470. TUESDAY DEC 23 STAGE STAGE ADOBE THEATER Forbidden Broadway’s Greatest Hits . ALBUQUERQUE LITTLE THEATRE White Christmas . $13 -$15. 2pm. See 12/19 listing. $12 -$24. 7:30pm. See 12/18 listing. AFRICAN AMERICAN PERFORMING ARTS CENTER , Expo KIMO THEATRE The Nutcracker . $7 -$27. 7 -9pm. See NM Shrek the Musical . $15 -$22. 4pm. See 12/19 12/18 listing. listing. NEXUS BREWERY Young, Dumb and Full of ALBUQUERQUE LITTLE THEATRE White Christmas . Comedy . A comedy open mic hosted by $12 -$24. 2pm. See 12/18 listing. John Cuellar, Eddie Stephens and AJ ARMORY FOR THE ARTS THEATER , Santa Fe Clan Tynker Martinez. 7pm. 242 -4100. Presents: The Dream Train . $10 -$12. 2 -4pm. See alibi.com/e/124224. See “Arts Feature.” 12/20 listing. SONG & DANCE AUX DOG THEATRE Christmas at the Yucca Vista . LORETTO CHAPEL , Santa Fe A Baroque Christmas . $16 -$20. 2pm. See 12/19 listing. $20 -$65. 6pm, 8pm. See 12/19 listing. BOX PERFORMANCE SPACE AND IMPROV THEATRE A FILM Charlie Brown Christmas . $10. 2pm. See 12/19 CCA CINEMATHEQUE , Santa Fe Untitled (Just Kidding) . A listing. series of experimental short films by Jesse Malmed. CELL THEATRE All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front $10 suggested donation. 8pm. (505) 982 -1338. Teeth . $7 -$22. 2pm. See 12/18 listing. alibi.com/e/123776. DESERT ROSE PLAYHOUSE Christmas the Musical . $10 -$12. 2pm. See 12/19 listing. WEDNESDAY DEC 24 THE DOOR CHRISTIAN CHURCH A Charlie Brown STAGE Christmas REUNION...25 Years Later . 7 -9pm. See ALBUQUERQUE LITTLE THEATRE White Christmas . 12/19 listing. $12 -$24. 1pm. See 12/18 listing. HEIGHTS CHRISTIAN CHURCH Ebenezer Scrooge . ARMORY FOR THE ARTS THEATER , Santa Fe Clan Tynker $8 -$12. 2pm. See 12/18 listing. Presents: The Dream Train . $10 -$12. 2 -4pm. See KIMO THEATRE The Nutcracker . $7 -$27. 2pm. See 12/20 listing. 12/18 listing. KIMO THEATRE The Nutcracker . $12 -$32. 1pm. See TRICKLOCK PERFORMANCE LABORATORY The Last 12/18 listing. Night of Ballyhoo . $20 -$22. 2pm. See 12/18 listing. SONG & DANCE THE VORTEX THEATRE A Christmas Carol . $15 -$22. LENSIC PERFORMING ARTS CENTER , Santa Fe 2pm. See 12/18 listing. Performance Santa Fe’s Christmas Eve Concert . Young SONG & DANCE virtuoso pianist and composer Emily Bear returns to CHURCH OF THE GOOD SHEPHERD, UCC The Gifts of play with Performance Santa Fe this Christmas Eve. Christmas Musical . The Chancel Choir and $10 -$25, $27 -$100. 2pm, 5pm. (505) 988 -1234. Ensembles of Church of the Good Shepherd UCC alibi.com/e/123661. present a program of motets and anthems. LORETTO CHAPEL , Santa Fe A Baroque Christmas . 11am -noon. 856 -1004. alibi.com/e/123603. $20 -$65. 6pm, 8pm. See 12/19 listing. THE KOSMOS Chatter Sunday: Copland + Sparrows . LEARN Featuring musicians Ingele Onstad (soprano), David GUERRILLA PHOTO GROUP Open Studio Play Time . A Felberg (conductor), Ruxandra Marquardt (violin) and creative collaborative for models, photographers, more. $5 -$15. 10:30 -11:30am. 307 -9647. stylists, makeup/hair artists and clothing designers. alibi.com/e/120717. 5:30pm -midnight. 681 -7471. alibi.com/e/89617. LORETTO CHAPEL , Santa Fe A Baroque Christmas . $20 -$65. 6pm, 8pm. See 12/19 listing. ON GOING NATIONAL HISPANIC CULTURAL CENTER The Nutcracker Ballet in the Land of Enchantment . NOTICES $14 -$47. 2pm, 7pm. See 12/19 listing. AFME Get Smart (Phone) Movie Contest . RODEY THEATRE , Popejoy Hall 16th Annual Recital Calling all film submissions made on all Navideño . $20 -$25. 2pm. See 12/19 listing. sorts of smart phones and tablets. Genres include documentaries, narratives or SOUTH BROADWAY CULTURAL CENTER A Holiday music videos. The early deadline is Friday, Celebration! $10, FREE for children under 5. 3pm. 12/19, regular deadline is 1/16/2015, See 12/20 listing. and the final deadline is 2/20/2015. For TEATRO PARAGUAS , Santa Fe A Musical Piñata for more info, go to abqfilmexperience.com. Christmas II . $5 -$20 suggested donation. 2pm. See $20 -$45. alibi.com/e/124222. See 12/18 listing. “Reel World.” a

[20 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [21 ] FLASH IN THE PAN FOOD |RestauRant Review BY ARI LEVAUX P H O T O S

Fat is Flavor B Y

E

Science reveals new truths about how R I C our body reacts to fats W I L

The holidays and the accompanying onslaught of L I A rich feasts present a timely opportunity to think M S about fat, and there is much to consider these •

E days. It’s beginning to look like some deeply-held R I C beliefs about fat might be wrong. W P H

One such aspect is the science of how fat is O T perceived by the body. O . C

A friend of mine who went to cooking school O M was fond of saying, “fat is flavor.” But according to traditional scientific understanding of flavor perception, fat doesn’t have any flavor. This isn’t to say that anyone ever claimed fatty foods aren’t delicious. But it was thought that other qualities of fat made this so; the creamy, viscous, lubricating qualities that it imparts are what make the food to which it is added taste better. But flavor is a specific metric, a combination of what is perceived by the tongue and smell. And fat, until recently, was thought to contain neither taste nor smell. But thanks to some new research, it looks like the cooks might have been 2 Tone red velvet signature An honest to goodness milk bar, my droogs. right all along. Earlier this year researchers at the Monell Chemical Senses Center, a nonprofit institute, reported evidence that humans can smell fat. And in the last few years, fat receptors on the human tongue have been discovered and Rude Boy Cookies confirmed by other research teams, which indicates humans can taste fat. s’mores cookie, topped with mini If we can taste it and smell it, then BY ERIC CASTILLO marshmallows and bits of chocolate baked it has flavor. Rude Boy Cookies right on top, looked the most inviting. And Our attraction to fats has been widely olly Old Saint Nick shouldn’t be the only 115 Harvard SE, Suite #7 while it didn’t evoke that campfire fresh taste, assumed to stem from the fact that fat is the one who gets to indulge in the milk and 200-2235 it satisfied my chocolate craving. most calorie-dense type of food we eat. Our cookies tradition this year. Thanks to the rudeboycookies.com Make sure you ask for it warmed; it’ll hunter-gatherer ancestors were programmed to J eat as much fat as they could find, goes the logic, opening of Rude Boy Cookies in the Bricklight Hours: 11am to 8pm Monday to Thursday make all the difference. In fact, it’s my opinion and this genetic disposition remains to this day. District near UNM, we can all embrace our 11am to 10pm Friday and Saturday that every cookie should come warmed up by But in a surprising twist, the fats to which inner Santa Claus. Closed Sundays default. Not only does it make a big difference Sitting between Bricklight DIVE and these receptors are tuned taste bad, not good. Vibe: Ska meets A Clockwork Orange meets Keebler in creating a soft and chewy texture, it’s what They detect free fatty acids, which are found in Cheba Hut on Harvard, Rude Boy Cookies is I’d expect when doling $2.50 for a gourmet Extras: Milk bar, walk-up window (open until 11pm large quantities in rancid fats. Rancid fats, which well poised to capture the attention of cookie. Friday and Saturday) can be poisonous, are worth avoiding, which is students and other University-area dwellers, Now if you want to really go over-the-top The Alibi recommends: double chocolate cookies, why they taste bad. whether they’re looking to satiate a sweet in your sweet indulgence, there are plenty of peppermint brownies By contrast, the form of fat that is so pleasing tooth or satisfy a case of the munchies. The ways to do so. For one, you can get any cookie in our mouths is a type in which the fatty acids late-night window, which allows for walk-up topped off with a scoop of Blue Bell ice cream. are bound into molecules called triglycerides. service, stays open an hour after the 10pm Adding a scoop adds a dollar to the total, but Thus, it appears we’re programmed to be attracted to the triglyceride form of fat, while closing time on Fridays and Saturdays. topped off at $3.25—more than your average the portion is generous. Rude Boy also offers being repulsed by free fatty acids. But there’s Monday through Friday you’ll have to get gallon of milk. Delicious but hardly a bargain. milkshakes and ice cream sandwiches made yet another rub: When we chew those yummy, there before 8pm. And while I appreciate the extra touches, like with your choice of cookies and ice cream, but nontoxic triglycerides, enzymes in our saliva The full Rude Boy experience is best mixing the syrup shots in cocktail mixers, I there was no way my insulin levels would have break them down and release the dreaded free enjoyed from within the shop’s interior. You’ll don’t know that I would spring for this allowed for me to take in any more sugar for fatty acids. be met with the sounds of ska playing particular splurge in the future. the day. Richard Mattes, a professor of nutrition overhead, a nod to the shop’s theme—the Now what’s worth the splurge is the main However, I did grab a to-go pack of their science at Purdue University, has researched term “rude boy” is slang for fans of the musical attraction at Rude Boy—the cookies. With cookie bites of the month. Through December, and published extensively on fat perception. He style. over a dozen options staring me down at the you can pick up the most New Mexican of told me he believes there is a delicate balance at The seating includes several tables, a counter, I rallied together with friends to cookies: biscochitos. A kid’s size comes with work here. A small quantity of free fatty acids curvy bench, and for those who want a front six bite-sized cookies for $2.50. The coupled with the glorious mouthfeel (and subtle sample a nice cross section. smell) of triglycerides tells the body that this is row view of the kitchen’s inner workings, bar Cookies are divided into two tiers, classic biscochitos are just as you’d expect. Light, good stuff to eat. But too many free fatty acids seating. and deluxe. Among the classic cookie options flaky, cinnamony, with a light kiss of anise. triggers a rejection of the food in question. At the bar you’ll also notice three spouts, ($1.75 a piece), we tried the 2 Tone red velvet Another December special, and my These fatty acid taste receptors aren’t just like taps you’d expect a pint of Guinness from, signature, a snickerdoodle and a double favorite among the treats I sampled, is the present in the mouth, but in other parts of the but these pour fresh glasses of milk instead. chocolate cookie. The winner among the peppermint brownie, served warm with bits of body as well, including muscle, skin, blood, Rude Boy Cookies claims it’s the only milk bar three was definitely the double chocolate, peppermint candy crushed on top. The spleen, intestine and brain cells. Free fatty acids in New Mexico. And since I have yet to come which delivered solid cocoa flavor and didn’t brownie, more than any cookie I tried, lived are the breakdown products of triglycerides, and across one anywhere else, I have no reason not get overwhelmed with sugar the way the up to my ooey gooey expectations. While the it is thought that these receptors are widely to believe them. snickerdoodle did. The red velvet, while age old debate between crunchy versus chewy dispersed in the body so the various tissues can I tried the Checkerboard chocolate, a bearing a classy checkerboard pattern on top, comes down to a matter of preference, I’m detect and appropriately deal with the free fatty serving of chocolate-flavored whole milk. acids that result from fat consumption. didn’t have the silky cream cheese topping I’d squarely in the soft and chewy camp all the So one doesn’t just “taste” fat in one’s mouth, Mighty Mighty milk (regular whole milk) is expect. way. If you have a similar taste, I’d recommend but in one’s whole body. This revelation also available on tap, while 2%, skim, almond From the deluxe options ($2.50 each), we one of the brownie bars over the cookies. suggests a broader level of meaning to the idea and soy milk options are available from the sampled the white chocolate macadamia nut If you’re looking for an occasional treat of taste perception. One thing that all of these jug. And for an extra touch, locally made and s’mores cookies. Like the snickerdoodle, that’ll vanquish your sweet tooth, you can find new developments haven’t changed is that syrups produced by Joliesse Chocolates can be the macadamia nut suffered from a bit too one at Rude Boy Cookies. And if you’re eating fat makes us happy. On that note, could added for 50 cents. Of course it all adds up. My much sugar for my liking, though it had that feeling extra generous, I’m sure Santa wouldn’t you please pass the mayo? a 14-oz. chocolate milk with caramel syrup buttery white chocolate flavor I love. The mind some of those biscochitos. a

[22 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [23 ] Chow town FAIRGROUNDS THE COOPERAGE a rotating guide to restaurants we like 7220 Lomas NE, 255-1657 • $$$ suggest a restaurant or search for more at: [STEAKHOUSE ] The Cooperage is old-school w alibi.com/chowtown Albuquerque, right down to the dusty light fixtures. The barrel-shaped steakhouse has been These listings have no connection with Alibi advertising a standby for 30 years thanks to its mile-long complimentary salad and soup bar, aged steaks (at a place like this, prime rib is king) and big dance floor that’s always packed on the Meat weekends. PEPPER’S OLE FASHION BBQ 303 San Pedro NE, 967-6427 • $$ Overload [BARBECUE/SOUL FOOD ] Proprietor Daniel “Pepper” Morgan has an impressive résumé. More DOWNTOWN importantly, he learned to cook from his grandmother, who taught him the recipe for her GRAVY barbecue sauce (tangy, smoky and practically 725 Central NE, 242-4299 • $$ drinkable) and passed on to him the soul of soul [AMERICAN ] After two years of preparation, Gravy food. All of the barbecue at Pepper’s is has finally opened in the old Milton’s building. spectacular. On the side, good luck choosing The place looks great, with a distinctly swank between collard greens with smoked turkey, take on the classic diner aesthetic, and the garlicky mac ’n’ cheese, molten-hot fried okra menu follows suit. Multiple varieties of and sweet potato corn bread. Closed Sunday. pancakes are offered for breakfast, along with huevos rancheros and an eggy pot pie. Dinner FAR NORTHEAST HEIGHTS is comfort food-oriented—think meatloaf, fried chicken and chicken fried steak—and there’s THE COUNTY LINE BBQ plenty of beer (locally brewed and otherwise) 9600 Tramway NE, 856-7477 • $$$ on tap with which to wash it down. [BARBECUE/SOUL FOOD ] Everyone loves good, old- fashioned barbecue, and you’ll find heaps of it at HOLY COW the County Line. It has everything you could 700 Central SE, 242-2991 • $$ want: sweet corn on the cob, coleslaw, brown- sugar beans, you name it. Oh, and meat, meat, [AMERICAN ] The site of Bob’s Fish and Chips on meat. The baby back ribs are especially good, as Central has been reincarnated as one of the is the homemade hickory barbecue sauce. Wash best burger joints in town. The NM grass-fed it down with a pint and phenomenal city views, Holy Cow burger comes on a brioche bun, while and you’ll be feeling right at home on the range. an ahi tuna sandwich, veggie club and dinner salads offer plenty of choices for bovine-averse diners. Beer and wine, plus shakes, malts and I-25 CORRIDOR floats, are available to complete the NEXUS BREWERY sacrament. 4730 Pan American Fwy NE, Suite D, 242- 4100 • $$ Q BURGER [BREWERY ] This brewery has quite a following, 301 Central NW, 224-bRgR (2747) • $ both for the beer and as a “New Mexican soul [AMERICAN ] Most of Q Burger’s long menu of food” gastropub. The menu offers specialties of meats is entirely from New Mexico, even a Southern-fried po’boys and the delicious robust wild boar burger with citrus sauce. Our marriage of chicken and waffles. It’s just the favorite is the mesquite bison burger with place to take your corn-bread-and-Frito-pie- pulled pork BBQ sauce, and of course there’s craving friends while still getting your craft beer the standard, but excellent, green chile cheese fix. And there’s live music too. Nexus has bands burger. It’s not all meat though. Vegetarians are booked several nights a week. Voted Best well cared for; salads are served on a bed of Comfort Food for 2014. grilled romaine (try the lentil), there’s gourmet mac and cheese, and sides like sweet potato MIDTOWN tots are a favorite. To drink, there are loads of regional and local craft beers and well-priced THE GRILL wines. 4615 Menaul NE, 872-9772 • $$ [AMERICAN ] Grandpa’s Grill on Route 66 has a EAST MOUNTAINS new home and a new name. Phil Chavez is offering up his familiar burgers, chicken, dogs, RIBS HICKORY BBQ steaks and condiment bar at The Grill, down the 12220 N. Hwy 14, 281-4227 • $$ block from Jennifer James 101 on Menaul. Crispy [BARBECUE/SOUL FOOD ] Some folks will tell you shoestring fries and the mesquite flavor of the barbecue is a difficult thing to screw up. Not grill give the “papa,” “mama” and “little rascal” true. That’s the reason your own barbecue isn’t burgers a nice lift. as good as the stuff at Ribs. The portions are large, the grub has a good, smoky essence to NOB HILL it, and there’s plenty to choose from. An B2B BISTRONOMY attached full bar means you can slurp down a 3118 Central SE, 262-2222 • $ margarita in between messy bites. [AMERICAN ] Nestled into half of the space formerly occupied by Vivace, Bistronomy B2B is a

KEY: $ = Inexpensive $8 or less | $$ = Moderate $8 to $15 | $$$ = Expensive $15 to $20 | $$$$ = Very Expensive $20 and up [24 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI NEXUS BREWERY

Chicken and waffles SERGIO SALVADOR SALVADORPHOTO.COM

small restaurant with a straightforward goal: to most-visited restaurant in the capital. It’s easy to serve the best damn local-beef hamburgers and find, there are always enough tables (when the microbrewed beers around. With 8 burgers to sun sets, sit out on the large patio), the people- choose from—including the delectable Nawlins watching is great, and the food keeps coming with blue cheese—and 33 local beers on tap, the until midnight. Plus, the barbecue and Southern- joint should be a beacon for anyone with a style food is reasonably priced. Do not miss the carnivorous appetite. Frito pie: a single-serving bag of Fritos, split open and topped with chili, onions and cheese. NORTH VALLEY Wash it down with a cold beer or a giant soda. This is a place for lunch and dinner, but you can MR. POWDRELL’S BARBEQUE also get simple breakfast burritos to go. HOUSE 5209 Fourth Street NW, 345-8086 • $$ UNIVERSITY [BARBECUE/SOUL FOOD ] Thick slices of beef, tender barbecued chicken and unbeatable cornmeal- THE CUBE BBQ dusted catfish are just a few of the items that 1520 Central SE, 243-0023 • $$ make this a premier restaurant to blow your diet [BARBECUE/SOUL FOOD ] While The Cube’s sky-high. But what really pushes this place over presentation is upscale, the portions you’ll get the edge are the fantastic side dishes: like are of standard barbecue proportions, unlikely to addictive fried okra; smoky, salty greens; and send you home hungry. Ribs, chicken, brisket, tender black-eyed peas, which are prepared with links and pulled pork are hickory-wood-smoked the same reverence and care as the main and prepared with a spice rub (“dry”) or attractions. drenched in tangy, smoky, sweet, acidic sauce THE STUMBLING STEER (“wet”). Both versions are excellent. Hot dog lovers will have plenty to chew on with Chicago 3700 Ellison NW, 792-7805 • $$$ dogs, bacon-wrapped Guadalajara dogs and [BREWERY ] Vegetarians will want to skip this one. 505 dogs (bacon, avocado and green chile). And The Steer features an array of very meaty dishes, with mapley candied yams, mac and cheese and from a locally raised beef hamburger to fried skin-on fries, the sides at The Cube are hardly pork belly niblets dipped in powdered sugar. The side notes. To wash down your meal, there’s a menu is pretty hefty, but whatever you do, don’t wine and beer list and a hefty menu of house- leave before trying the crispy Brussels sprouts and a glass of Kim Crawford’s sauvignon blanc. made mousses, pies and muffins for dessert. NORTHEAST HEIGHTS QUARTERS BBQ 801 Yale SE, 843-6949 • $$ PAUL’S MONTEREY INN [BARBECUE/SOUL FOOD ] You’ll probably have to 1000 Juan Tabo NE, 294-1461 • $$$ battle full parking lots and at least a moderate [STEAKHOUSE ] Paul’s is the kind of place normally wait, but these delays, annoying as they may be, associated with slabs of artery-clogging red meat are one of the best “reviews” a restaurant could and liver-corroding martinis. With high-backed hope for. Inside, the dim lighting and rustic banquette seating and intimate mood lighting, décor fade away when an enormous pile of it’s the perfect date destination—especially if your tender, saucy meat appears before you and your suitor is paying. family. The low-heat sauce is tangy and sweet, but mellow enough to go down nice and easy SANTA FE without a pucker. Fans of old-school kitsch will appreciate the round barroom; it was the main THE COWGIRL BBQ dining area of a sombrero-shaped restaurant in 319 S. Guadalupe, (505) 982-2565 • $$ the 1950s. a [AMERICAN ] For years, Cowgirl has been our

KEY: $ = Inexpensive $8 or less | $$ = Moderate $8 to $15 | $$$ = Expensive $15 to $20 | $$$$ = Very Expensive $20 and up WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [25 ] REEL WORLD FILM | revIew BY DEVIN D. O’LEARY

Fra-GEE-leh Everybody’s (yes, everybody’s) favorite Annie holiday film, 1983’s A Christmas Story, will It’s a hard-knock life for a former orphan and a guy who used to be grace the big screen at the historic KiMo Theatre (423 Central NW) on Friday, Dec. 19, Daddy Warbucks in this not-so-expertly updated musical at 8pm. This classic tale of a young boy’s wish for “an official Red Ryder, carbine action, two- hundred shot range model air rifle” is based on BY DEVIN D. O’LEARY the memoirs of humorist Jean Shepherd. It’s easy enough to find on TV this time of year, ou hate to kick a cute little kid when she’s but it belongs in a movie theater. Tickets are down. For starters, Little Orphan Annie is, $4 for students, $6 for seniors and $8 for Y well, an orphan. (Actually, in this latest adults. They’re available at the KiMo box version, she’s been reclassified as a “foster kid”— office or in advance at kimotickets.com. perhaps because orphans are too depressing). But still. On top of that, her new film Annie was leaked onto the internet after computer pirates uFilm on iPhone (allegedly from North Korea) hacked into Sony Pictures’ servers. Finally, to add insult to injury, The Albuquerque Film and Media Experience the final product has arrived in theaters, and it’s a is promoting next year’s third annual film tone-deaf clunker that will end up satisfying festival with a “Get Smart (Phone) Movie almost no one over the Christmas holidays. Contest.” Filmmakers worldwide are asked to Little Orphan Annie began life as a Depression- submit a 7-to-10-minute short in any genre. era newspaper strip by Harold Gray. It was turned As the title suggests, films must be shot on into a hit musical in 1977 and has popped on and hand-held devices such as iPhones, Androids off Broadway for decades, landing a notoriously and tablets. Judging will be based on troubled movie version in 1982. For reasons little originality, story line, cinematography and known and less understood, rap impresario Jay Z editing. First prize includes a $500 cash borrowed a sample from Annie ’s signature tune award plus “a ton of promotion including an “It’s the Hard Knock Life” for his 1998 song exclusive radio interview on AFME on AIR.” “Hard Knock Life (Ghetto Anthem).” Somehow Early submission deadline is Friday, Dec. 19. that inspired Z to produce a modern, African- You have until then to submit your film for American cast version of the musical. Jay Z only $20. After that the fee goes up to $25 teamed up with Will Smith and Jada Pinkett per film. After Jan. 16 it jumps to $45. Final Smith, who saw the film as the perfect vehicle for “You ever see Booty Call , kid? I was great in that.” deadline to submit is Feb. 20. For complete their weird kids. Fortunately, the Smith offspring information on how to submit your work, go to dropped out, leaving room for Quvenzhané abqfilmexperience.com. Wallis (the little spark plug from Beasts of the revolve around cell phones, text massaging, Southern Wild ) to step into the title role. She’s Annie Twitter, Vine or Facebook. Most of them are pretty much the only bright spot in this flat- organic enough to work—at least for the kids in Opens Friday 12/19 footed production. the audience. Occasionally, Gluck even manages Guild goes Dark Written and directed by Will Gluck The opening shot of Annie treats us to the to pen a good zinger (as when Annie and her pals Starring Quvenzhané Wallis, Jamie Foxx, Rose Albuquerque’s own Dark Matters Film Festival image of an overly plucky redhead tap dancing attend the red-carpet premiere of a ridiculous Byrne, Cameron Diaz is returning this Saturday, Dec. 20, with its her way through a school report. She’s quickly Twilight -esque blockbuster). He’s markedly less Rated PG third annual “Horror Bites” collection. In case hustled off screen, however, in favor of our real successful, though, when it comes to the you didn’t know, the winter solstice takes Annie (Wallis). It’s meant to be a cheeky little directing. As a musical Annie falls painfully flat. place on Dec. 21. That makes Dec. 20 the joke cueing audiences to the fact that this is not Producers apparently wanted some sort of shortest—and therefore darkest—day of the your parents’ Annie . However, like last year’s The he’s a misanthropic, germophobic billionaire. But realistic take on the story. But the end result is a year. What better time to get over to Guild Lone Ranger , it demonstrates considerable when he saves Annie from being run over by a musical with no fantasy, no pizzazz and precious Cinema (3405 Central NE) and catch a day- contempt for the source material. Who wants to bus, he becomes a sudden internet celebrity. little energy. Most of the musical numbers are long selection of short horror, sci-fi and dark see a plucky, redheaded orphan singing and Stacks’ kindhearted assistant Grace (Rose simply one person singing with no props, no fantasy films from around the globe? At 4pm dancing? Certainly not anyone who would go see Byrne, looking lovely but having little to do) and fancy costumes and barely a step or two of things kick off with the sci-fi/fantasy block. At a movie version of Annie , right? ... Right? his oily campaign manager Guy (Bobby choreography. Annie’s iconic number 6pm it’s an entire block of animation. At 8pm As mentioned earlier, our new Annie is no Cannavale, giving the film its one-note villain) “Tomorrow,” for example, features Annie simply you get a whole bunch of horror. Tickets are longer an orphan, but a foster kid living under are quick to realize the candidate’s brief walking down a street in New York singing. $7 per programming block or $15 for all three. the care of failed, faded pop idol Miss Hannigan interaction with cute little Annie has suddenly Another has her standing on a stage warbling That’s a bargain for an amazing collection of (Cameron Diaz). Diaz steals nearly every scene humanized him. Guy arranges a few photo into a microphone. Wallis seems to have a decent films representing countries from America to she’s in ... in the sense that her heinous opportunities between Annie and Stacks, and voice, and she belts her tunes out just fine. But Spain to the Philippines. If you still haven’t overacting amounts to brazen daylight robbery. before you can say “rising poll numbers,” Stacks the film ends up being even more stage-bound had your fill after all of that, Dark Matters will Diaz was apparently told to camp it up as much as has become Annie’s temporary guardian. Stacks than the stage version. be cosponsoring the Alibi Midnight Movie possible, while the other actors were instructed to clearly has no interest in Annie as anything other Quvenzhané Wallis probably still has stardom Madness screening at 10:30pm. That will tone it way down. Wallis, for her part, manages to than a vote generator. Annie, meanwhile, is in her future. And even this shallow adaptation feature the supernatural Australian thriller be sunny without resorting to saccharine. It’s an happy to be a political prop, so long as she gets to can’t stifle the inherent, heartwarming nature of The Babadook . Admission for that film is $8 inspired casting choice, one that makes you wish stay in a fancy New York penthouse and hand out Annie ’s rags-to-riches narrative. Despite their general admission or $6 students. To get you she had been given a better vehicle in which to expensive cell phones to her friends. It’s disappointment audiences will probably still hum in the mood for all these movies, Dark Matters show off her talents. refreshing to find that the characters are so self- along with a few of the tunes and shed a tear or is hosting a special Dark Beer Party on Friday, One day, while out conducting her weekly aware, but the message—about the many benefits two at the expected happy ending. But this Dec. 19, at Bird of Paradise Liquors (5409 ritual search for her birth parents, Annie crosses of materialism—is pretty damn cynical when you modern-day take on Little Orphan Annie just gets Gibson SE) starting at 6:30pm. Mix and paths with cell phone tycoon William Stacks. think about it. too much wrong. At one point our heroine mingle with fellow horror fans while sampling (OK, who here thought “Bill Stacks” was a better Writer-director Will Gluck (who did great explains that Depression-era America was “just some of Bird of Paradise’s incredible selection pun than “Oliver Warbucks”?) Seems that Stacks work on Easy A and meh work on Friends With like today, only without the internet.” Nice try, of seasonal brews. What’s the matter? You’re (played with buttoned-down seriousness by Jamie Benefits ) deserves some credit for his heavily but no. Even a dose of winking self-awareness not afraid of the dark, are you? a Foxx) is running for mayor but is unable to updated script. You can tell this is a modern can’t make up for this film’s indecisive tone, garner much public sympathy—mostly because Annie because almost all the plot developments cynical message and drab direction. a

[26 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI TELEVISION | IDIOT BOX Santa Lazy Christmas Eve around the Dial Santa comes without having to change the BY DEVIN D. O’LEARY channel. On Dec. 24 Cartoon Network offers up a generic block of Christmas-themed episodes of lready? Yes, I’m afraid so: Christmas Eve is everything from “Teen Titans Go!” to “Uncle less than a week away. So how will you Grandpa” to “Adventure Time.” Nickelodeon does A spend your evening? Sitting before a the same with episodes of “Full House,” “The Fresh crackling yule log, surrounded by your loving Prince of Bel-Air” and “Friends.” Animal Planet family, sipping hot cider and listening to the amps it up, though, with its “Too Cute: Merry pleasant sounds of carolers as they stroll the Cuteness Marathon” (Animal Planet 5pm to snow-covered avenues outside? Or postprandially 1am) , featuring eight hours’ worth of puppy and entrenched on the couch, watching antiquated kitty videos. Ignoring random stuff like Syfy’s Christmas specials, waiting for your sugarplum- “Wizard Wars” marathon and National addled kids to fall asleep so that Santa can get his Geographic’s “The Legend of Mick Dodge” groove on? ... Cause if it’s the latter, we’ve got marathon, we arrive at the most appropriate you covered. marathon of the evening, the “Toy Hunter The bread and butter of Christmas is TV Marathon” (Travel Channel 7pm to 1am) , which specials. Most networks have steadily burned off will lull even the most overgrown of kids to sleep their supply over the last 30 days or so. But there with six hours’ worth of toyetic memories. are still a few in the offing on Christmas Eve. The Moviewise, you’ve got plenty to choose from. 1962 animated special Mr. Magoo’s Christmas Firstly, NBC has got a lock on the 1946 holiday Carol (KWBQ-19 7pm) holds up surprisingly well juggernaut It’s a Wonderful Life (KOB-4 7pm) . as an adaptation of Charles Dickens’ holiday There are certainly worse ways to spend your classic. That’s followed by “Merry Madagascar” Christmas Eve than watching Jimmy Stewart (KWBQ-19 8:30pm) , a spin-off of the popular contemplate suicide. You could, for example, catch Madagascar films. Unlike “Mr. Magoo,” it might The Santa Clause 3: The Escape Clause (WGN not be on TV 50-odd years from now, but it’s got 6:15pm) or Christmas with the Kranks (Lifetime some laughs. CBS travels into the past as well, 6pm) . But if you’re spending your Christmas Eve delivering the “I Love Lucy Christmas Special” watching a Tim Allen movie, you really need to (KRQE-13 7pm) . It’s a digitally colorized 1956 reevaluate your life. A better choice would be to go episode in which the Mertz family helps the with the 1945 comedy-romance Christmas in Ricardos decorate their Christmas tree. To round Connecticut (TCM 8pm) , starring Barbara out the hour, they throw in that episode where Stanwyck and Dennis Morgan. If you prefer Lucy works on a conveyor belt at the candy something a bit more modern, watch the Will factory. It has nothing to do with Christmas, but Ferrell favorite Elf (ABC Family 7pm) . Or you everybody loves it. You could also check out “Jeff could always turn on “24 Hours of A Christmas Dunham’s Very Special Christmas Special” Story ” (TBS/TNT 6pm) . This annual, one-day (Comedy Central 7pm) . But I wouldn’t marathon of the nostalgic, 1983 film is as big an recommend it. Ventriloquism is harmful to your annual tradition as buying a carton of eggnog, only health. drinking half and then throwing the clogged-up Marathons are a fine way to pass the time until carton out sometime after New Year’s. a

abuse, interviews and commentary 7pm) Unrepentant crap like this is (hopefully not from wacky celebrity why we love you, Syfy. THE WEEK IN guest stars). SUNDAY 21 SLOTH FRIDAY 19 “Spy World” (Travel 7pm) Travel “All Hail King Julien” ( streaming Channel hops the globe from anytime) Netflix gives wacky lemur Washington to Moscow to THURSDAY 18 dictator King Julien (from the reconstruct famous spy stories from Madagascarfilms) his own spin- World War II and the Cold War. “The iHeartRadio Jingle Ball 2014” off series. So long as Mort is in tow, (KWBQ-19 7pm) Taylor Swift, Iggy I’m good with this. Azalea, Maroon 5, Ariana Grande, MONDAY 22 Pharrell, Meghan Trainor—basically “Christmas in Washington” (TNT 6pm) everybody from every other concert Aloe Blacc, Hunter Hayes, Rita Ora “Tiny House Hunting” (FYI 8pm) The special and musical award show this and Darius Rucker show up to do their houses are tiny, not the people year—pop up for one last lip-synch of thing. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson hunting for them. Which is kind of a their hit songs (until New Year’s Eve, hosts—which makes it sound like shame. FYI really missed the at which point they do it all over terrorists are going to attack during chance to strike basic-cable gold again). the tree-lighting ceremony. here: actual little people hunting for tiny houses. Better yet: Amish little “People Magazine Awards” (KOB-4 “Caught on Camera With Nick Cannon” people hunting for tiny houses. With 8pm) Well, it’s about time somebody (KOB-4 7pm) Nick Cannon, who’s ghosts in them. stepped up to the plate and started never met a job that’s beneath him, handing out awards to America’s hosts ... yup, another goddamn viral most overexposed pop cultural video clip show. TUESDAY 23 celebrities. Jennifer Aniston and “A Home For the Holidays” (KRQE-13 “One Direction: The TV Special” Jennifer Lopez are among the 8pm) Jennifer Hudson, Train, (KOB-4 7pm) Tween-age girls (and celebrants. Maroon 5 and 5 Seconds Katharine McPhee and Earth, Wind & single mothers who have at one of Summer are among the musical Fire try to guilt-trip you into adopting time or another stolen their guests. Basically all the Jennifers and a kid. daughters’ copies of Twilight) all the “5”s. “The Late Late Show with Craig are invited to go screaming nuts “Conan To Go” (TBS 8pm) Conan Ferguson” (KRQE-13 11:37pm) over a Christmas appearance by O’Brien hosts a one-hour clip show Scottish comic Craig Ferguson says Niall, Zayn, Liam, Harry and Louis. featuring his favorite remote goodbye to “The Late Late Show” in “The Year: 2014” (KOAT-7 9pm) Robin segments from the past four seasons. the first of many late-night talk show Roberts looks back on the year that Among the bits: “Conan Visits the shakeups to come. Jay Leno stops by was and interviews Meghan Trainor, American Girl Store,” “Lyft Kevin to wish him bon voyage. English because she definitely was. Hart & Ice Cube” and “Grand Theft actor/comedian James Corden takes Auto V Gamer.” over on March 9. WEDNESDAY 24 “Cosby Under Fire” (Reelz 7pm) Reelz Channel boldly steps into the Cosby SATURDAY 20 See “Idiot Box” above. a controversy, offering an “exclusive look” at the allegations of sexual Christmas Icetastrophe(Syfy

WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [27 ] FILM | CAPSULES

your life? Well, here it is in movie theaters. 131 minutes. of the year. 108 minutes. PG. (Century 14 Downtown, Rio Hutcherson) from evil government forces when she gets a BY DEVIN D. O’LEARY PG. (Opens Sunday 12/21 at Century Rio) Rancho Premiere Cinema, Century Rio, Cottonwood call from the rebel leader (Julianne Moore) asking her to OPENING THIS WEEK Stadium 16) become the face of the rebellion. It beats being the face Night at the Museum: Secret of the of L’Oreal. ... And now you only have an entire year to wait Annie Tomb Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of until the second half of the story. 123 minutes. PG-13. Reviewed this issue. 118 minutes. PG. (Opens Friday Ben Stiller and friends (and the monkey) are back in this Ignorance) (Rio Rancho Premiere Cinema, Century 14 Downtown, 12/19 at Rio Rancho Premiere Cinema, Century 14 third outing about wacky hijinks at a natural history Alejandro González Iñárritu ( Babel, 21 Grams ) directs Century Rio, High Ridge, Cottonwood Stadium 16) Downtown, Century Rio, Cottonwood Stadium 16) museum after the lights go out. Seems the magic that Michael Keaton ( Batman ) in this winkingly meta farce causes all the displays to come to life at night is fading, about a washed-up action movie star who tries to mount Interstellar The Babadook and our security guard hero (Stiller) must travel the a comeback on Broadway. Shot in what looks like a Earth is dying, and it’s up to intrepid astronaut Matthew From Australia comes this gripping psychological horror globe, uniting characters old (Robin Willams’ Teddy single, breathless take, the film swoops and soars McConaughey to find mankind a new planet to colonize. thriller. Worn-out single mother Amelia (Essie Davis) is Roosevelt) and new (Dan Stevens’ Sir Lancelot) to save it. through the corridors of a venerable Broadway theater The clock is ticking, man, hurry up! Christopher Nolan doing her best to raise her troubled young son Samuel 97 minutes. PG. (Opens Friday 12/19 at Cottonwood watching its manic, self-loathing, hallucination-prone (The Dark Knight, Inception ) directs this grand, galaxy- (Noah Wiseman). One day the kid finds an unusual Stadium 16, Rio Rancho Premiere Cinema, Century 14 protagonist face crisis after crisis. Dark and funny, cynical spanning space adventure—which manages to be both bedtime storybook about a monstrous intruder named Downtown, Century Rio) and empathetic, this oddly experimental gem offers artistically dreamy and science-geeky smart. Ther are the Babadook. Before long Samuel’s imagination goes viewers this year’s most original cinematic vision. plenty of moments when it swings too far in both into overdrive, and he’s convinced this literary boogeyman P.K. Reviewed in v23 i45. 119 minutes. R. (Century Rio, High directions—but it’s still a sight to behold on the big is coming for him. As dark coincidences begin to pile up Aamir Khan, Sanjay Dutt and Anushka Sharma star in this Ridge) screen. 169 minutes. PG-13. (Rio Rancho Premiere around the house, mom starts to believe as well. The comedy-drama about an innocent stranger who appears Cinema, Century Rio, Cottonwood Stadium 16) frights are powerful, but writer-director Jennifer Kent puts in Delhi and starts asking questions that force people to Dumb and Dumber To real-life emotions ahead of seat-grabbing scares. 93 reappraise their world. Eventually P.K.’s childlike curiosity Twenty years later moronic friends Lloyd (Jim Carrey) and Penguins of Madagascar minutes. Unrated. (Opens Sunday 12/14 at Guild transforms into a “spiritual odyssey for him and millions Harry (Jeff Daniels) reunite for a cross-country road trip. Following cameos in the Madagascar films and a Cinema) of others.” In Hindi with English subtitles. 153 minutes. Harry’s searching for the daughter he never knew, but it’s successful TV series, the wannabe-super-spy penguins get Unrated. (Opens Friday 12/19 at Century 14 Downtown) really just an excuse for our two characters to engage in their own feature spin-off. This CGI toon shows audiences Being There more of their patented clueless idiocy. 109 minutes. PG- how dimwitted waterfowl Skipper, Kowalski, Rico and This 1979 comedy, based on a Jerzy Kosinski novel and Searching for Bobby Fischer 13. (Century Rio, Cottonwood Stadium 16) Private got their start in the global espionage biz. 92 directed by Hal Ashby ( Harold and Maude, Coming Learners Chess Academy presents a special screening minutes. PG. (Rio Rancho Premiere Cinema, Century 14 Home ), features one of Peter Sellers’ best performances. and benefit of this heartwarming 1993 film about a Exodus: Gods and Kings Downtown, Cottonwood Stadium 16, Century Rio) Sellers is Chance, a simple-minded, socially sheltered prepubescent chess prodigy who learns the ropes of the Christian Bale ( The Dark Knight ) is Moses and Joel gardener who inherits a fortune and becomes a trusted game from New York City chess hustlers (Laurence Edgerton ( Warrior ) is Ramses in Ridley Scott’s action- St. Vincent advisor to a powerful businessman. Politics, celebrity, Fishburne, Ben Kingsley among them). 109 minutes. PG. disaster retelling of the famous Biblical tale. All the Newly divorced Maggie (Melissa McCarthy) moves with media obsession and television are just a few of the (Opens Sunday 12/21 at Guild Cinema) basics are there: Moses rising up against the cruel her young son next door to cranky old misanthrope topics this ahead-of-its-time film satirizes. Double- Egyptian pharaoh, bringing down the plagues, setting Vincent (Bill Murray). Before long, the drinking, gambling featured with another outsider comedy, The Brother From Wild 600,000 slaves free, parting the Red Sea. But Scott (who war vet is baby-sitting her bullied, father-figure-seeking Another Planet . 130 minutes. PG. (Opens Sunday 12/21 Reese Witherspoon stars in this inspirational biopic about gave us Gladiator, Kingdom of Heaven, Black Hawk Down son. We’ve seen this kind of “innocent kid melts the heart at Guild Cinema) Cheryl Strayed, who lost her mother and slipped in a bout and Robin Hood ) is more interested in the sword- of a mean, old codger” plenty of times before. But the of sex and drug addiction. Instead of going to therapy, swinging battle scenes—of which there are plenty. The cast really gives it their all, helping this prickly she decided to go all hippie and hike the Pacific Crest The Brother From Another Planet special effects are appropriately grandiose, but some of tragicomedy rise above the schmaltz. 102 minutes. PG- Trail solo. It’s kind of like Eat, Pray, Love —but with walking This early indie effort by John Sayles ( Lone Star, The the casting is questionable, and the dialogue is 13. (Cottonwood Stadium 16) instead of food. 115 minutes. R. (Opens Friday 12/19 at Secret of Roan Inish, Eight Men Out) is a sly commentary frequently ripe. 150 minutes. PG-13. (Century 14 Century Rio, High Ridge) on race relations in which an escaped alien slave (played Downtown, Rio Rancho Premiere Cinema, Century Rio, The Theory of Everything by Joe Morton) ends up in 1984 Harlem. Double-featured Cottonwood Stadium 16) ‘Tis the season for high-toned biopics. Eddie Redmayne with another outsider comedy, Being There . 108 minutes. (The Pillars of the Earth, Les Misérables ) stars as world- R. (Opens Sunday 12/21 at Guild Cinema) STILL PLAYING Fury famous physicist Stephen Hawking. This inspirational Who doesn’t love a good tank movie? We haven’t had a romantic drama concentrates on Hawking’s pre-talking- Dark Matters Presents: Horror Bites III 20,000 Days on Earth good tank movie in a long time. Tanks are cool. Brad Pitt wheelchair relationship with his college girlfriend-cum-wife Jane (Felicity Jones, Like Crazy ). It’s Dark Matters Film Festival returns with its annual salute Cult fave writer and musician Nick Cave marks his stars as a veteran Sherman tank commander leading a beautifully performed and perfectly bittersweet, but to short films centered around the theme of darkness. 20,000 day on planet Earth by starring in this intimate five-man crew on a deadly mission behind enemy lines occasionally feels too expertly crafted for Academy Award Short shockers from around the world (America, Australia, documentary (for lack of a better word), chronicling a toward the end of World War II. Outnumbered, outgunned appeal. Reviewed in v23 i48. 123 minutes. Unrated. Spain, Ireland, Canada, the Philippines) are grouped into typical 24-hour period in the Australian-born artist’s life. and limping along in a broken war machine, our heroes (Century Rio, Century 14 Downtown, High Ridge) three programming blocks. At 4pm is a collection of dark He drives around, stops in on friends, cooks dinner, gets face overwhelming odds. Gritty, bloody and brutally sci-fi and fantasy. At 6pm is a selection of cutting-edge psychoanalyzed and sings the occasional song even. paced, this down-in-the-trenches look at life during This Ain’t No Mouse Music! animation. At 8pm it’s the final block concentrating wartime mixes exaggerated movie violence and “ugly Casual, eclectic and “staged” without being “stagey,” this Musical detective Chris Strachwitz is profiled in this tune- directly on horror. Blocks are approximately 80 minutes truth” history in almost equal measure. 134 minutes. R. unusual portrait of an artist is a must for Cave fanatics. filled documentary. Since 1960 Strachwitz has been the each. (Opens Saturday 12/20 at Guild Cinema) (Cottonwood Stadium 16) 97 minutes. Unrated. (Guild Cinema) guiding force behind anti-corporate Arhoolie Records—the legendary indie label responsible for bringing Cajun Foxcatcher Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No The Homesman music out of Louisiana, Tex-Mex out of Texas and blues Steve Carell goes way against type here, playing (real-life) Good, Very Bad Day Following up on his feature directing debut, The Three from all over the country. Here, the man himself takes us multimillionaire John E. du Pont, a blue blood weirdo who The popular chidren’s book gets turned into a madcap Burials of Melquiades Estrada , Tommy Lee Jones helms along on his quest to find the musical soul of America. sponsored a couple of wrestlers (played by Channing comedy in which an unlucky boy transfers his bad juju to and stars in this alternately brutal, comic and Tatum and Mark Ruffalo) in the 1988 Olympic Games. 92 minutes. Unrated. (Guild Cinema) his hapless family for a single day. Steve Carell and sentimental Western. Lee plays a cantankerous drifter Let’s just say things did not end well. Director Bennett Jennifer Garner are on mom and dad duty. There isn’t a hired by a pious frontierswoman (Hilary Swank) to Miller, who knows a good nonfiction story when he hears Top Five lot of depth to be found here—mostly just a string of transport a trio of shell-shocked pioneer women back it, also directed Capote and Moneyball . But in this Chris Rock writes, directs and stars in this hard-hitting chaotic set-pieces—but director Miguel Arteta ( Chuck & east. 122 minutes. R. (Century 14 Downtown, High Ridge) increasingly dark crime thriller about male bonding gone satire about a popular comedian (Chris Rock) trying to Buck, The Good Girl ) adds just enough honest-to- make it as a serious actor who gets talked into horribly wrong, he’s hit tragic gold. The cast (yes, even Horrible Bosses 2 goodness social awkwardness to give it a bit of gravity. broadcasting his wedding on TV by his reality star fiancée Tatum) is revelatory, and the details are pitch (black) Jason Bateman, Charlie Day and Jason Sudeikis return Reviewed in v23 i41. 81 minutes. PG. (Cottonwood (Gabrielle Union). Pals Rosario Dawson, Adam Sandler, perfect. 134 minutes. R. (Opens Friday 12/19 at Century for more criminal hijinks—but this time around, they Stadium 16, Movies 8, Movies West) Kevin Hart, Whoopi Goldberg, Jerry Seinfeld, Tracy Morgan Rio, High Ridge) appear to be the horrible bosses. Unable to get their new and Cedric the Entertainer all drop by to lend support. Big Hero 6 business off the ground thanks to a slick investor, the trio The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five 101 minutes. R. (Century Rio, Rio Rancho Premiere plot a harebrained kidnapping scheme. Jennifer Aniston Armies When Disney took over Marvel, everyone wondered what Cinema) that mash-up would look like. Now we know. Based and Kevin Spacey drop by to help. 108 minutes. R. (Rio Peter Jackson wraps up his monumental (perhaps a little (quietly) on the Marvel comic of the same name, this sci- Rancho Premiere Cinema, Century Rio, Cottonwood too much so) adaptation of J.R.R. Tolkien’s The Hobbit . Whiplash fi cartoon feels like a Disneyfied (in the best sense) take Stadium 16) Here we finally get to the closing action sequence, a war A shy young musician (Miles Teller from The Spectacular on the superhero genre. Tech-savvy teenager Hiro lives in that pits five armies and a dragon against one another in Now ) dreams of becoming a world-famous jazz drummer. futuristic San Fransokyo with his brother and aunt. But The Hunger Games: Mockingjay—Part 1 a battle for the fate of Middle-earth. 144 minutes. PG-13. Attending a prestigious New York music academy, he gets when his bro is murdered and his greatest invention Hollywood is sick of trilogies. That’s only three movies’ (Opens Tuesday 12/16 at Rio Rancho Premiere Cinema, the opportunity to learn from the school’s most infamous stolen, Hiro teams up with an inflatable robot named worth of profits. The cool thing now is to take the final instructor (J.K. Simmons from “Oz”). What follows is the Century 14 Downtown, Century Rio, Cottonwood Stadium book in a trilogy and split it in two different movies (like 16, High Ridge) Baymax and a group of self-proclaimed “science nerds” musical equivalent of the training camp sequence from to get revenge on the masked villain responsible. The The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn—Part 1 and The Twilight Full Metal Jacket . Simmons is perfect as the sadistic It’s a Wonderful Life (1946) story is your standard superhero origin tale. But the sci-fi Saga: Breaking Dawn—Part 2 ). So apparently Katniss taskmaster, but Teller matches him beat-for-beat as the (Jennifer Lawrence) has destroyed the Hunger Games. Is it possible that you’ve seen this holiday pic starring flourishes are well conceived, and the unflappably determined student. Reviewed in v23 i45. 107 minutes. She’s hiding out, trying to rescue her boyfriend (Josh Jimmy Stewart less than a dozen times over the course of kindhearted Baymax is easily the most lovable character R. (High Ridge) a

[28 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI FILM | TIMES wEEk oF FrI., DEC. 19-ThurS., DEC. 25

CENTURY 14 DOWNTOWN 20,000 Days on Earth Fri 8:30 100 Central SW • 1 (800) 326-3264 ext. 943# The Babadook Fri-Sat 2:00, 10:30 Dark Matters Presents: Horror Bites III Sat 4:00, 6:00, 8:00 P.K. Fri-Tue 12:30, 3:55, 7:20, 10:45 Searching For Bobby Fischer Sun 1:00 Annie Fri-Tue 1:10, 4:00, 7:00, 9:55 Being There Sun-Tue 3:30, 8:30 Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb Fri-Tue 11:45am, The Brother From Another Planet Sun-Tue 6:00 2:15, 4:45, 7:15, 9:45 The Hobbit: The Battle of the FIve Armies 3D Fri-Tue 12:55, 3:05, 4:10, 6:20, 7:25, 9:35, 10:40 HIGH RIDGE 12910 Indian School NE • 275-0038 The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies Fri-Tue 11:50am, 2:00, 5:15, 8:30 Foxcatcher Fri-Tue 12:20, 4:00, 7:00, 10:10, Wed 12:20, 4:00, Exodus: Gods and Kings Fri-Thu 12:10, 7:10 7:00 Exodus: Gods and Kings 3D Fri-Tue 1:55, 3:40, 5:25, 8:55, Wild Fri-Tue 12:50, 4:15, 7:35, 10:25; Wed 12:50, 4:15, 7:35 10:35 The Hobbit: The Battle of the FIve Armies 3D Fri-Wed 3:45, The Homesman Fri-Tue 1:45, 4:55, 7:50, 10:50 7:15 The Theory of Everything Fri-Tue 1:20, 4:15, 7:30, 10:25 The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies Fri-Tue 12:15, 10:45; Penguins of Madagascar Fri-Thu 11:40am, 2:05, 4:30, 6:55, Wed 12:15 9:20 The Homesman Fri-Tue 12:40, 3:55, 7:40, 10:40; Wed 12:40, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay—Part 1 Fri-Thu 1:25, 4:25, 3:55, 7:40 7:35, 10:30 The Theory of Everything Fri-Tue 1:05, 4:20, 7:30, 10:35; Wed Big Hero 6 Fri-Thu 1:35, 4:20, 7:05, 9:50 1:05, 4:20, 7:30 The Hunger Games: Mockingjay—Part 1 Fri-Tue 12:45, 4:00, CENTURY RIO 7:10, 10:20; Wed 12:45, 4:00, 7:10 I-25 & Jefferson • 1 (800) 326-3264 Whiplash Fri-Tue 12:30, 4:25, 7:30, 10:35; Wed 12:30, 4:25, 7:30 Foxcatcher Fri-Tue 12:05, 3:30, 6:55, 10:20 Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) Fri-Tue 1:00, Wild Fri-Tue 10:00am, 1:05, 4:15, 7:25, 10:30 4:05, 7:25, 10:20; Wed 1:00, 4:05, 7:25 Annie Fri-Sat 9:50am, 11:20am, 12:55, 2:30, 4:05, 5:40, 7:15, 8:50, 10:25, 12:01am; Sun-Tue 9:50am, 11:20am, 12:55, 2:30, 4:05, 5:40, 7:15, 8:50, 10:25 MOVIES 8 4591 San Mateo NE • 1 (800) Fandango, express # 1194 Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb Fri-Sat 9:45am, 10:40am, 11:35am, 12:30, 1:30, 2:25, 3:20, 4:20, 5:20, Scrooged Fri-Tue 12:30, 3:30, 6:30, 9:30; Wed 12:30, 3:30, 6:15, 7:10, 8:15, 9:10, 10:00, 11:05, 11:55; Sun 9:45am, 6:30 10:40am, 11:35a,, 12:30, 1:30, 2:25, 3:20, 4:20, 5:20, 6:15, Gone Girl Fri-Tue 12:50, 4:30, 8:00; Wed 12:50, 4:30 7:10, 8:15, 9:10, 10:00, 11:05; Mon-Tue 9:45am, 10:40am, Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day Fri- 11:35a,, 12:30, 1:30, 2:25, 3:20, 4:20, 5:20, 6:15, 7:10, Tue 11:40am, 2:00, 2:50, 4:20, 6:40, 7:50, 9:00; Wed 8:15, 9:10, 10:00 11:40am, 2:00, 2:50, 4:20, 6:40, 7:50 The Hobbit: The Battle of the FIve Armies 3D Fri-Sun 10:15am, The Best of Me Fri-Tue 12:10, 3:40, 7:20, 10:20; Wed 12:10, 10:50am, 11:25am, 12:00, 1:10, 1:45, 2:20, 2:55, 3:30, 3:40, 7:20 4:40, 5:15, 6:25, 7:00, 8:10, 8:45, 9:20, 10:30, 11:05, John Wick Fri-Tue 12:00, 5:10, 10:30; Wed 12:00, 5:10 11:40; Mon-Tue 10:15am, 10:50am, 11:25am, 12:00, 1:10, The Book of Life Fri-Wed 11:30am, 4:50, 7:30 1:45, 2:20, 2:55, 3:30, 4:40, 5:15,6:25, 7:00, 8:10, 8:45, The Book of Life 3D Fri-Tue 2:10, 10:15; Wed 2:10 9:20, 10:30 The Maze Runner Fri-Tue 12:20, 3:20, 6:50, 10:00; Wed 12:20, The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies Fri-Tue 9:40am, 3:20, 6:50 12:35, 4:05, 5:50, 7:35, 9:55 Guardians of the Galaxy Fri-Wed 12:40, 7:00 It’s a Wonderful Life (1946) Sun 2:00, 7:00; Wed 2:00, 7:00 Guardians of the Galaxy 3D Fri-Tue 3:50, 10:10; Wed 3:50 Top Five Fri-Tue 11:15am, 2:05, 4:55, 7:45, 10:35 Exodus: Gods and Kings Fri-Tue 10:35am, 11:45am, 2:15, 3:25, 5:55, 7:05, 9:35, 10:45 MOVIES WEST Exodus: Gods and Kings 3D Fri-Sat 1:00, 4:35, 8:20, 12:01am; 9201 Coors NW • 1 (800) Fandango, express # 1247 Sun 4:35, 8:20; Mon-Tue 1:00, 4:35, 8:20 Scrooged Fri-Tue 1:45, 4:25, 7:05, 9:45; Wed 1:45, 4:25, 7:05 The Theory of Everything Fri-Tue 11:55am, 3:15, 6:30, 9:45 Gone Girl Fri-Tue 12:30, 3:55, 7:20; Wed 12:30, 3:55 Penguins of Madagascar Fri-Tue 10:45am, 1:25, 4:10, 6:45 Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day Fri- Horrible Bosses 2 Fri-Tue 10:30am, 1:40, 4:45, 7:40, 10:40 Tue 12:10, 1:30, 2:30, 4:50, 7:10, 9:40; Wed 12:10, 1:30, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay—Part 1 Fri-Sat 9:35am, 2:30, 4:50, 7:10 11:05am, 12:45, 4:00, 5:35, 7:20, 10:35, 12:01am; Sun-Tue The Best of Me Fri-Tue 1:05, 4:00, 6:55, 9:50; Wed 1:05, 4:00, 9:35am, 11:05am, 12:45, 4:00, 5:35, 7:20, 10:35 6:55 Dumb and Dumber To Fri-Tue 9:25 John Wick Fri-Tue 4:35, 7:15, 9:55; Wed 4:35, 7:15 Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance) Fri-Tue 2:20, The Book of Life Fri-Tue 12:00, 5:10, 7:45; Wed 12:00, 5:10 8:55 The Book of Life 3D Fri-Tue 2:35, 10:20; Wed 2:35 Interstellar Fri-Sun 11:30am, 3:35, 7:30, 11:30; Mon-Tue The Maze Runner Fri-Tue 1:35, 4:25, 7:15, 10:05; Wed 1:35, 11:30am, 3:35, 7:30 4:25, 7:15 Big Hero 6 Fri-Tue 9:55am, 12:50, 3:50, 6:50, 9:50 Guardians of the Galaxy Fri-Wed 1:00, 7:00 Guardians of the Galaxy 3D Fri-Tue 4:00, 10:00; Wed 4:00 COTTONWOOD STADIUM 16 Cottonwood Mall • 897-6858 RIO RANCHO PREMIERE CINEMA Annie Fri-Tue 12:20, 3:30, 7:10, 10:00 1000 Premiere Parkway • 994-3300 Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb Fri-Tue 11:40am, Top Five Fri-Tue 10:20am, 1:05, 3:45, 6:25, 9:05 12:10, 2:15, 2:45, 4:45, 5:15, 7:15, 7:45, 9:50, 10:20 Night at the Museum: Secret of the Tomb Fri-Tue 10:25am, The Hobbit: The Battle of the FIve Armies 3D Fri 11:30am, 12:05, 1:00, 2:40, 3:35, 5:15, 6:20, 7:50, 8:55, 10:25 12:30, 3:15, 4:15, 7:00, 8:00, 10:45, 11:45; Sat-Sun Annie Fri-Tue 1:05, 4:00, 6:55, 9:50 11:30am, 12:30, 3:15, 4:15, 7:00, 8:00, 10:20, 11:20; Mon- The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies Fri-Tue 10:00am, Tue 11:30am, 12:30, 3:15, 4:15, 7:00, 8:00, 10:20 1:25, 2:25, 4:50, 8:15 The Hobbit: The Battle of the Five Armies Fri 12:00, 3:45, 7:30, The Hobbit: The Battle of the FIve Armies 3D Fri-Tue 11:00am, 11:15; Sat-Tue 12:00, 3:45, 7:30, 10:50 5:50, 9:15 Exodus: Gods and Kings 3D Fri-Tue 12:00, 3:30, 7:00, 10:20 Exodus: Gods and Kings Fri-Tue 10:30am, 2:00, 5:25, 9:00 Exodus: Gods and Kings Fri-Tue 12:30, 4:00, 7:30, 10:50 Exodus: Gods and Kings 3D Fri-Tue 12:00, 3:25, 6:50, 10:15 Penguins of Madagascar Fri-Tue 11:30am, 2:00, 4:30, 6:55, Penguins of Madagascar Fri-Tue 12:00, 2:30, 5:00, 7:30, 10:00 9:30 Horrible Bosses 2 Fri-Tue 12:10, 3:15, 6:00, 8:50 Horrible Bosses 2 Fri-Thu 11:45am, 2:20, 5:00, 7:35, 10:15 The Hunger Games: Mockingjay—Part 1 Fri-Tue 10:15am, The Hunger Games: Mockingjay—Part 1 Fri-Tue 11:45am, 2:45, 12:15, 1:15, 3:15, 4:15, 6:35, 7:35, 9:35, 10:35 6:45, 9:45 Interstellar Fri-Tue 10:20am, 2:10, 5:55, 9:40 Dumb and Dumber To Fri-Tue 11:40am, 2:25, 5:10, 7:50, 10:30 Big Hero 6 Fri-Tue 10:25am, 1:20, 4:05, 6:50, 9:35 Interstellar Fri-Tue 11:50am, 3:45, 7:45 Big Hero 6 Fri-Tue 11:35am, 2:10, 4:50, 7:25, 10:05 St. Vincent Fri-Tue 9:40 SUB THEATER Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day Fri- UNM (Student Union Building Room 1003) • 277-5608 Tue 11:45am, 1:50, 4:15, 6:45 Closed for the semester Fury Fri-Sat 12:05, 3:30, 6:50, 10:10; Sun 3:30, 6:50, 10:10; Mon-Tue 12:05, 3:30, 6:50, 10:10 WINROCK STADIUM 16 IMAX & RPX GUILD CINEMA 2100 Louisiana Blvd. NE • 881-2220 3405 Central NE • 255-1848 Please check alibi.com/filmtimes for films and times. a This Ain’t No Mouse Music! Fri 4:30, 6:30

WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [29 ] AURAL FIXATION MUSIC | SHoW Up! BY AUGUST MARCH T S I T R A

E H

Five Christmas Tunes that Don’t T

F O

Nauseate Us Y S E

Anyone who’s suffered the slings and arrows of T R outrageous fortune—all of humanity, I’m looking U O C at you—knows that part and parcel of those S E

bruising encounters with life includes suffering G A M

through another year of holiday-themed music. I Don’t worry; it all ends at midnight on Boxing Day, but some years are worse than others. I recall one year here in Burque when the local oldies station went with a package of tunes that comprised a not-so-sly mash-up of Christmas classics and Beatles bits—rather deadly stuff, as it turns out. Who knows how many car crashes and yuletide divorce proceedings resulted from some From left, Cowboys and Indian and Word Salad circa 1997 marketing department’s brightest seasonal dream? The answers to those particular inquiries may never be known, but many who were exposed to these monstrous constructions were Bah! Hum-What?! grateful that at least in retrospect, the station chose not to go with a Stones-Xmas combo. Great concerts hit Burque ... Again?! Among all this wantonly acquisitive experimentation, there’s gotta be some decent Street NW) on Friday, Dec. 19. If one was headlines a concert that’s all about transcending tuneage. And there is. After some research and BY AUGUST MARCH advised to dress in a fashion reminiscent of our the holiday vibe. Train Conductor (see reckoning, we here at the Alibi music department favorite, fictional festive folk, I’d choose Al Thursday) is also on board for the evening. have come up with a short list of listenably here’s a party in my mind/ And I hope it Franken’s character in Trading Places . You Additionally Burque DJ/producer ZenOvA luxurious interludes designed to guide you never stops/ I’m stuck here in this seat/ I know—the baggage handler with grand ideas mixes things up mystically while grunge-hop through the coming week with aplomb. might not stand up/ Other people can about gorilla-dom. This concert is also an left-fielder Summon —whose release Scapegoat Coming in at Number 5 on the countdown is “T go home/ Other people, they will split/ I’ll be opportunity to check out some righteous local was one of the best local recordings I heard in “Father Christmas” by The Kinks. Riotously acts. 2014—deconstructs everything in its path. Time rocking and unapologetically punk in its outlook, here all the time/ I can never quit/ Everything is Roots-rockin’ Double Plow features the Parents (Andrew Lyman and Adrian Toto) this tune takes a critical glance at the Western very quiet/ Everyone has gone to sleep/ I’m wide gift-giving tradition as it’s transported into awake on memories/ These memories can’t brotherly, rockabilly-adjacent talents of open. Amazingly, this full night of timeless, local difficult economic times, desperation and wait.”— “Memories Can’t Wait” by Talking Dwayne and Jimmy James Norris. Burque music is free, and it begins at 9pm. disappointment. Give my dad a job because he Heads from the album Fear of Music hillbilly stalwart Cowboys and Indian is a trio needs one, indeed. composed of Native American Gerome Fragua Sunday Greg Lake’s “I Believe in Father Christmas,” I’m pretty sure these particular song lyrics belting out hot licks, while cowboys Matthew If you’re seeking local, cultural treasure, I our Number 4 song, explores similar themes albeit reflect my own concert experiences; in fact, Ezzard (bass) and Jeff Cooper (drums) bop out suggest you head out to the Corrales Bistro in a more poetically ornate manner. And though Byrne’s flat-yet-provocative delivery on a boot-scooting rhythm section. Psychobilly Brewery (4908 Corrales Rd.) on the afternoon some of the middle instrumental parts were “Memories Can’t Wait” sounds suspiciously like honky-tonkers Mr. Right and the Leftovers of Sunday, Dec. 21, for an encounter with plucked directly from a Prokofiev composition, my life in general. For example, I drove several open. This event benefits the SouthWest Pawn Drive . Americana-folk with decidedly the song carries a fair amount of gravitas along as fellow freaks at Eldorado High School to the Rural Theatre Project. Tickets are only $8, and rocanrol antecedents—multi-instrumentalist it explores the reason for the season. edge, playing Fear of Music at a holiday party doors are at 8pm, while the performance Robert Darrell Sparks was part of first- The Number 3 song has to be “Christmas” by when everyone really wanted to hear The Wall begins at 9pm. generation Burque new wave punks The Who from the rock opera Tommy . Okay, so or Van Halen II. Hijinks ensued. That made for Gargantuans, and string player-slash-guitar- it’s only incidentally about the holiday, concerning some great memories, folks, but it’s surely not as Saturday maker Jason Fink formed the influential Dim itself instead with the perceptions (and lack profound as the mental vignettes you’ll be able This year’s Anti Xmas show at Launchpad Bulb with Mike Gerwin way back in the thereof) of a certain blind, future youth prophet. to generate after checking out this week’s stellar (618 Central SW) happens Saturday, Dec. 20. ’80s—this ensemble of collaborators and co- Townshend’s lyrics are spot on, though when it lineup of live and loungy tuneage available The show features the reunion of seminal conspirators has long been a nexus of comes to our perception of the season’s darkness right here in the Duke City. Burque hardcore sludgemasters Word Salad . command and control for some of our town’s and light, Daltrey observes and intones, “They Serio . The band’s 1995 Science Project great players, including members of Selsun believe in dreams and all they mean/ Including Records split with Scared of Chaka remains Blue and The Rivet Gang. heaven’s generosity.” Plus which, the drum roll Thursday after the second chorus just plain kills. Blackbird Buvette (509 Central NW) presents one of punk’s definitive Duke City Intensely laid-back yet filled with glorious Our Number Two tune was originally recorded Sean Costanza on Thursday, Dec. 18. declarations. Though the ensemble has only grit after nearly 30 years in the biz, Pawn Drive by Mitch Miller in 1960, then covered by Brave Costanza is a New Mexico native whose played intermittently since the millennium’s is perfect solstice-Sunday afternoon dreaming Combo and thoroughly and wantonly singular take on Americana has brought about onset, they’re still fully capable of causing and beer drinking tuneage. The mostly deconstructed by Bob Dylan circa 2009. Like a a rambling, traveling life resonant with songs cranial aneurysms that render sentences into acoustic recitation commences at 3pm, and it’s lot of post-millennial Zimmerman, “Must Be about sweet promises and doleful regrets. He chaotic post-skate fragments. totally free. Santa” is gravelly with dark overtones. Dylan tours in support of latest effort Here in the Standing on the shoulders of giants that does his best to seem rollicking, but the chaos Light . A powerful alt.country contender with evening will be old town grindcore outfit There’s a party in my mind, and I hope it never observed in one part of this version’s video lends tunes like the elegiac yet hopeful “Down the Laughing Dog , Rio Rancho thrashers stops. Since it’s the music that keeps that fiesta an unmistakably anxious vibe to the proceedings; Line” in his repertoire, his deft handling of Econarchy , doomy Denverite Doperunner , rolling along, I doubt I’ll be able to quit this feeling is felt by many celebrants each and classic instrumentation on “Rapturous Love” unholy El Paso anarchists Communion of anytime in the foreseeable future. Even when every year, but few are willing to admit to it. adds to the cred. Costanza gigs at Blackbird Thieves and Santa Fe’s dark avant-metalheads things go quiet, it’s only for a moment. Maybe The best, most beautiful holiday song recorded from 6 to 8pm. Torn Between Worlds . Sounds like Krampus that’s when the memories get made. Here’s one thus far on this planet is “Christmas at the Zoo” by After 9pm, Fort Worth-based, locally will be there too. The opposite of Christmas more of mine: One fellow who listened to my The Flaming Lips, our Number 1 Xmas tune. popular indie-psych post-punk practitioners can be experienced for only 10 bones. The impromptu playing of Fear of Music told me Featuring the freaky, bendy guitar talents of Train Conductor take the stage, providing a doors open at 8pm; the show is at 9:30pm. years later that the recording haunted him and Ronald Jones (before Lips mastermind Steven powerfully abstract contrast to Costanza’s led him on a path chock-full of ennui and Drozd scared him off) and lyrics that are mostly narrative naturalism. Bone Forest is on board dissembled thinking. I told him he was lucky I concerned with the lives of caged yet grateful Saturday If you fear the sulfurous, mercurial metal river didn’t choose Big Science at that long ago, animals, “Christmas at the Zoo” reflects a timeless as an opening act. These awesome shows are coursing through this town’s labyrinthine winter break throw-down. He didn’t think that sense of wonder and hopelessness in all its snow- 21-plus and free, and the venue opens at 4pm. covered glory. And alongside the plaintive underground, there’s a groovy, freaked-out was funny. So now it’s your turn; go out and pronouncements of front man Wayne Coyne, Drozd Friday psychedelic alternative up the street at Sister make some holiday live music memories before still manages to beat the hell out of the drums. a Pinup Productions’ Epic Christmas Character (407 Central NW) on Saturday, Dec. 20, too. I change my mind and dig that Laurie Party happens at Low Spirits (2823 Second Local mind expansion-research team YOU Anderson album off the rack, entiendes ? a

[30 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI Wednesday DEC 17 8:00pm Doors MIDNIGHT GHOST TRAIN PREY FOR KALI SKULLDRON +RED MESA Thursday DEC 18 8:00pm Doors THE LYMBS OMINGNOME PORT ALICE +SUGARMOTOR Saturday DEC 20 8:00pm Doors ANTICHRISTMAS WORD SALAD REUNION LAUGHING DOG ECONARCHY DOPERUNNER COMMUNION OF THIEVES TORN BETWEEN WORLDS

Friday DEC 26 8:00pm Doors SANCTUARY PRESENTS MERRY BLACKMASS... DOMMERUNG XIBALBOLA K. OSS + MERCY HISTRIO SATYRICON JACK B. NIMBLE

Saturday DEC 27 8:00pm Doors REVIVA CONCEPTO TAMBOR MONDO VIBRATIONS

Friday DEC 19 8:00pm Doors PINUP PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS: EPIC CHRISTMAS CHARACTER PARTY!! DOUBLE PLOW COWBOYS AND INDIAN MR. RIGHT AND THE LEFTOVERS THE SOUTHWEST RURAL THEATRE PROJECT

Saturday DEC 20 8:00pm Doors MERICAN SLANG 5 O'CLOCK REVOLUTION SLOW JEREMIAH

Friday DEC 26 8:00pm Doors ERIC MCFADDEN

Wednesday DEC 31 7:00pm Doors A NEW YEAR'S EVE CELEBRATION WITH RYAN MCGARVEY

WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [31 ] SONIC REDUCER MINE SHAFT TAVERN , Madrid Benito • Americana • 5pm • BY AUGUST MARCH Music Kamikaze Karaoke • 8pm • FREE MOLLY’S BAR , Tijeras Doug Muchmore • 1:30pm • Bella Calendar Dawn • 6pm • FREE Various MONTE VISTA FIRE STATION Le Chat Lunatique • dirty Artists jazz • 9pm • FREE The Art of NOB HILL BAR & GRILL DJ Ohm • 10pm • FREE McCartney THURSDAY DEC 18 OLD TYME SHOP AND ICE CREAM PARLOR , Tijeras Open (Arctic Poppy Records) BLACKBIRD BUVETTE Sean Costanza • Jam Session • 6:30pm • FREE • ALL -AGES! Paul McCartney is my 6pm • See “Show Up!.” • Train POSH NIGHTCLUB DJs and Entertainment • 9pm • $10 for least-favorite Beatle. Conductor • psychedelic • Bone Forest • men Ironically, some of his compositions are among 9pm • FREE • See “Show Up!.” PUEBLO HARVEST CAFÉ Party on the Patio: Raven & The my all-time rocanrol favorites—see “Things CORRALES BISTRO BREWERY , Corrales JeeZ La WeeZ • Sweet Potato Band • 6pm • $10 We Said Today,” “Here, There and jazz, funk • 6pm • FREE SCALO NORTHERN ITALIAN GRILL Al Demarco Trio with Everywhere,” “Junior’s Farm” and “Temporary THE COWGIRL BBQ , Santa Fe Greg B. and the Gunsels • Patty Stephens • jazz • 8:30pm • FREE Secretary”—so the idea of (much less the twang, soul • 8pm • FREE SHERATON UPTOWN HOTEL Live Music & Drink Specials • existence of) a decent McCartney tribute DIRTY BOURBON Asphalt Cowboys • country • 9pm • $5, 6pm • FREE album is joyfully dreadful to me. The Art of FREE for ladies SIDELINES SPORTS GRILLE & BAR Chris Ravenous • McCartney is an exhaustive, three-disc EMBERS STEAKHOUSE , Isleta Casino Shane Wallin • classic rock • 9pm • FREE adventure into the music that defined Macca’s soul, pop • 6pm • FREE SKYLIGHT , Santa Fe The Alchemy Party • Nathan New • DJ brilliance. Avoiding his missteps, the result is HOTEL ANDALUZ Jesus Bas y MÁS • 7pm • ALL -AGES! Dirt Girl • CP_Squared • 9pm • $5 -$7 hagiographic in nature and un-deconstructed, IMBIBE THROWBACK with DJ Flo Fader • 9:30pm • FREE SNEAKERZ Happy Hour: Desert Soul Band • 6pm • FREE but some of it is unforgettable. What Beatles THE JAM SPOT Neurotic November • 6pm • $10 THE STAGE @ SANTA ANA STAR , Bernalillo Fashionista lover wouldn’t want to hear Bob Dylan cover LAUNCHPAD The Lymbs • rock • Omingnome • Port Alice • Friday: DJ Andy Gil • 9pm • $5 for women; $10 for men “Things We Said Today” or listen in as Alice rock • Sugarmotor • 9:30pm • $5 ST. CLAIR WINERY & BISTRO Wildewood • indie, Cooper renders “Eleanor Rigby” as a self- MARCELLO’S CHOPHOUSE Karl Richardson • 6:30pm • Americana • 6pm • FREE conscious horrorshow circus? Come to think FREE STONE FACE TAVERN The Electric Edric Project • classic of it, The Cure handles “Hello, Goodbye” with MOLLY’S BAR , Tijeras The Larry Conga Show • 6pm • FREE rock • 9pm • FREE a deft twist, but including Sammy Hagar on MONTE VISTA FIRE STATION Alex Maryol • blues, rock • TLUR PA LOUNGE , Sandia Resort and Casino Blu Sol • this release—belting out “Birthday” no less— 8pm • FREE dance, variety • 9:30pm • FREE is just a sad reminder of who and what we’re RANCHERS CLUB Lindy Gold • piano • 6:30pm • FREE TRIPLE SEVENS , Isleta Casino Redneck • country • actually dealing with here. SCALO NORTHERN ITALIAN GRILL Dusty Low • folk, 9:30pm • FREE Americana • 8:30pm • FREE UPTOWN SPORTS BAR & GRILL DJ Flo Fader • 9pm • FREE SKYLIGHT , Santa Fe Latin Night • 9pm VERNON’S HIDDEN VALLEY STEAKHOUSE Shane Wallin • Pixies ST. CLAIR WINERY & BISTRO Jazz Brasileiro • bossa nova • soul, pop • 7:30pm • FREE Doolittle 25 6pm • FREE VICK’S VITTLES “We Can Duet” Country Live Music • 5pm • (4AD) THE SWISS BISTRO & BAKERY , Santa Fe “Wes & Mito” FREE Back in April 1989, Pixies Virtuoso Guitar Duo • 7:30pm • FREE • ALL -AGES! WAREHOUSE 21 , Santa Fe A Memorial Show for Max put an album called TRACTOR BREWERY WELLS PARK Thirsty Thursday: Chad Friedenberg: D Numbers • I heart Metal • Flamingo Doolittle out on 4AD. It’s Barela • 8pm • FREE Pink • The Proxemics • We Drew Lightning • psychedelic, good stuff, full of pith, sexy TRIPLE SEVENS , Isleta Casino Karaoke • 7:30pm • FREE rock • Jesse Malmed • 6:30pm vocals, guitar flourishes, VERNON’S HIDDEN VALLEY STEAKHOUSE Chris Thomas • cinematic overtones and an attention to piano, vocals • 6pm • FREE SATURDAY DEC 20 unhinged melodicism. Doolittle can’t really be ZINC WINE BAR & BISTRO The Steve Maase Project • compared to anything else going on in music blues • 9:30pm • FREE ABQ BREW PUB Chase Dabney • 7pm that year, except maybe Nirvana’s Bleach ; both ALBUQUERQUE MUSEUM OF ART AND HISTORY Art in are revolutionary musical statements, even FRIDAY DEC 19 the Afternoon: Last Call • jazz • 2pm • FREE compared to that year’s heavyweight stuff. All BIEN SHUR Kari Simmons Group • R&B, funk, soul • 9pm • that happened 25 years ago, for crissakes, and ABQ BREW PUB Moon Hat • 7pm • FREE • ALL -AGES! FREE now the silver anniversary edition, Doolittle 25 , BIEN SHUR Kari Simmons Group • R&B, funk, soul • 9pm • BLACKBIRD BUVETTE “It Wasn’t Me” hosted by Jim is out on 4AD. The new packaging includes a FREE Phillips • 6pm • Cynical Bird + guests • 10pm • FREE plethora of sometimes-interesting-but-totally- BLACKBIRD BUVETTE Michael Weaver Live Jukebox • CARAVAN EAST Power Drive Band • country, variety • unnecessary extra tracks. Otherwise, listening 7pm • Fresh Fridays with DJ Cello & Guests • 10pm • Ernestine Romero • Spanish, variety • 5pm • $8 is as glorious as the first time, especially as one FREE THE COOPERAGE En-Joy • Cuban salsa • 9:30pm • $10 proceeds from the sheer awesomeness that is CARAVAN EAST Power Drive Band • country, variety • 5pm • CORRALES BISTRO BREWERY , Corrales Lightning Hall • “Debaser” through the solemnity of “Monkey $5 6pm • FREE Gone to Heaven” with “Gouge Away.” I’ll CORRALES BISTRO BREWERY , Corrales All Around Mota • THE COWGIRL BBQ , Santa Fe The Santa Fe Chiles Dixie always prefer preceding release Surfer Rosa 6pm • FREE Jazz Band • 2pm • The Bus Tapes • folk, rock • 8:30pm • for its raw and ready rock, but this iteration is a THE COWGIRL BBQ , Santa Fe The Shiners Club • swing • FREE surprising reminder of what Pixies possessed. 5pm • The Strange • rock • 8:30pm • FREE DIRTY BOURBON Asphalt Cowboys • country • 9pm • $5 DIRTY BOURBON Asphalt Cowboys • country • 9pm • $5 FIRST TURN LOUNGE , Downs Racetrack and Casino DRAGON HORN TAVERN Odd Dog • classic rock • 8:30pm • Gonzalo • Spanish • 1pm • FREE She & Him FREE GRAVITY NIGHTCLUB AND LOUNGE All You Want For Classics EMBERS STEAKHOUSE , Isleta Casino Troupe Red • 8pm • Christmas: Etheogen • Levi • Bodhi Beatz • Nicho and (Columbia Records) FREE more • 7pm • $10 -$15 FIRST TURN LOUNGE , Downs Racetrack and Casino IMBIBE Ryan Shea • 10pm • FREE I recently watched a film Gonzalo • Spanish • 1pm • FREE about trees poisoning the LA CUMBRE BREWING CO. Odd Dog • classic rock • 7pm • HISTORIC EL REY THEATER Parade of Lasers 2014 • FREE East Coast because 9pm • $15 -$25 humans are destroying LAUNCHPAD Anti Xmas! Word Salad HOTEL ANDALUZ Jazz Brasileiro • bossa nova • 6:30pm • the planet. The movie Reunion: Laughing Dog • metal • FREE starred Zooey Deschanel and Marky Mark. Econarchy • DopeRunner • Communion While Wahlberg exhibited frantic undertones, IMBIBE The Rudy Boy Experiment • rock, blues • 6pm • DJ of Thieves • Torn Between Worlds • Deschanel seemed wan and faraway. That Rotation • 10pm • FREE 9:30pm • $10 • See “Show Up!.” disappointed me ... until I remembered she’s in ISLETA RESORT & CASINO: THE SHOWROOM An Evening LEMONI LOUNGE Le Chat Lunatique • dirty jazz • 7:30pm • a band with folkster M. Ward. They’re called of Holiday Hits: Michael McDonald • singer-songwriter • FREE She & Him, and they’re always contenders on 7pm • $40 -$50 • ALL -AGES! LOUNGE 54 @ SANTA ANA STAR , Bernalillo Lenin & the holiday charts. She & Him just dropped a LOUNGE 54 @ SANTA ANA STAR , Bernalillo Lenin & McCarthy • acoustic, rock, pop • 9pm • FREE new album of cover songs. While not afflicted McCarthy • acoustic, rock, pop • 9pm • FREE LOW SPIRITS Merican Slang • funk • 5 O’clock Revolution • with the same gravitas as the stuff in this LOW SPIRITS Epic Christmas Character Slow Jeremiah • 9pm • $5 week’s other reviews, Classics is a damn sight Party: Double Plow • rock • Cowboys MALARKY’S Malarky’s Showcase Saturday: Traveler in better than M. Night Shyamalan’s preachy and Indian • rockabilly • Mr. Right And Pain • Black Mesa • In the End • 8:30pm • FREE eco-thriller The Happening . There’s The Leftovers • punk-a-billy • 9pm • See MARCELLO’S CHOPHOUSE Tony Rodriguez Duo • something impeccably light here. The duo’s “Show Up!.” 6:30pm • FREE musical chemistry is a lively counterpoint to MALARKY’S Malarky’s Showcase Weekend: Traveler in MINE SHAFT TAVERN , Madrid Alex Culbreth • folk • 4pm • the existential dread induced by that film and Pain • In the End • The Michael Ruelas Project • 9pm • Desert Southwest Blues Band • 8pm • FREE all albums reviewed above. In particular, FREE MOLLY’S BAR , Tijeras Atomic Balm • rock, blues • recitations of “Would You Like to Take a MARBLE BREWERY WESTSIDE TAP ROOM Daigle Duo • 1:30pm • Iron Chiwawa • 6pm • FREE Walk?” and “Time After Time” are thrillingly 6pm • FREE apt breaks from heaviness. a MARCELLO’S CHOPHOUSE Karl Richardson Duo • 6:30pm • FREE Music Calendar continues on page 34

[32 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [33 ] Music Calendar continued from page 32 EVENT | PREVIEW

MONTE VISTA FIRE STATION Dusty Low • folk, Americana • 9pm • FREE OLD SAN YSIDRO CHURCH , Corrales Pura Fé and The Ulali Project • 7:30pm • $22 -$25 • ALL -AGES! PUEBLO HARVEST CAFÉ Party on the Patio: Last Call • jazz • 6pm • $10 RANCHERS CLUB Lindy Gold • piano • 7pm • FREE SCALO NORTHERN ITALIAN GRILL Charlie Christian Project with Bobby Shew • jazz • 8:30pm • FREE SIDELINES SPORTS GRILLE & BAR H28 • classic rock • 9pm • FREE SISTER YOU • Train Conductor • psychedelic • Time Parents • ZenOvA • Summon • 9pm • FREE • See “Show Up!.” SKYLIGHT , Santa Fe Dark Is The Night Circus • 7pm • $15 -$25 • ALL -AGES! • Alchemy 2.0 • 9pm • Hector A Host of Sparrows Romero • electronic • 10pm • $12 -$25 On Sunday, Dec. 21, Chatter ABQ presents THE STAGE @ SANTA ANA STAR , Bernalillo Vegas Night: intense, compelling chamber music by Aaron DJ Miss Joy • 9pm • $5 for women; $10 for men Copland and Joseph Schwantner at The THE SWISS BISTRO & BAKERY , Santa Fe Ambiance Kosmos (1715 Fifth Street NW). Under the Band • 7:30pm • FREE • ALL -AGES! baton of David Felberg, a large chamber TRACTOR BREWERY WELLS PARK Idris Goodwin Listening ensemble will perform serialist composer and Party • 7pm • “In the Mix” Live DJs • 9pm • FREE Pulitzer Prize-winner Schwantner’s Sparrows , an intriguing exploration of life TRIPLE SEVENS , Isleta Casino Redneck • country • among the birds using postmodern 9:30pm • FREE compositional VERNON’S HIDDEN VALLEY STEAKHOUSE Chris Dracup techniques. These Trio • blues • 7:30pm • FREE techniques include VICK’S VITTLES “We Can Duet” Country Live Music • 5pm • SUNDAY using all 12 tones, DECEMBER 21 FREE diverging harmonics ZINC WINE BAR & BISTRO Next 2 the Tracks • 9:30pm • and the rising-and- The Kosmos FREE falling dynamics that 1715 Fifth Street NW one typically alibi.com/e/120078 SUNDAY DEC 21 associates with 10:30am airborne adventure. BLACKBIRD BUVETTE 10 Drink Minimum Podcast with The 10-piece Chris Burnett, Bill Bellmont & guests • 8pm • FREE orchestra includes soprano Ingele Onstad, CORRALES BISTRO BREWERY , Corrales Lynn Gorman (harp), Jesse Tatum (flute) and Pawn Drive • folk, Americana • 3pm • Jeff Cornelius and Hovey Corbin (percussion). FREE • See “Show Up!.” Copland’s As It Fell Upon a Day , an early, complex work, will be contrasted with the THE COWGIRL BBQ , Santa Fe Cowgirl Brunch with composer’s vernacular, Americana piece Billy Broomdust Gospel Quartet • noon • Alex Culbreth • folk • the Kid, transcribed for cello and piano and 8pm • FREE featuring the talents of James Holland (cello) IL VICINO BREWERY CANTEEN Dusty Low • folk, and Tzufeng Liu (piano). Among other Americana • 3pm • FREE reasons, Copland is notable for his earnest THE KOSMOS Chatter Sunday: David exploration of many genres within art music, Felberg • conductor • Ingele Onstad • from modernist-influenced early work through soprano • James Holland • cello and his folksy musical narratives based on life in more • 10:30am • $5 -$15 • ALL -AGES! • America. Later in his career, Copland also See preview box. experimented with jazz and the blues, and his LIZARD TAIL BREWING Spankey Lee • solo finger-style Four Piano Blues will be performed too. Local guitar • 4pm • FREE poet (and former Alibi arts editor) Erin Adair- MINE SHAFT TAVERN , Madrid Jim & Tim • soulful blues • Hodges begins the morning meditation at 2pm • FREE 10:30am. Prices range from $5-$15. (August March) SKYLIGHT , Santa Fe Westin McDowell’s Shiner’s Club Jazz a Band • jazz • 7pm • $20 VERNON’S HIDDEN VALLEY STEAKHOUSE Bob Tate • solo piano • 6pm • FREE IMBIBE College Night with DJ Automatic & Drummer ZINC WINE BAR & BISTRO Kodama Trio • instrumental • Camilo Quinones • 9pm • FREE 6pm • FREE MINE SHAFT TAVERN , Madrid Timbo Jam Session • 7pm • FREE MONDAY DEC 22 MOLLY’S BAR , Tijeras Marilyn Hubbert • 6pm • FREE NOB HILL BAR & GRILL College Night: United We Rage BLACKBIRD BUVETTE Whiskey Business Karaoke! • 9pm • DJ • 10pm • FREE FREE SKYLIGHT , Santa Fe Turn UP on Tuesdays • 9pm CORRALES BISTRO BREWERY , Corrales Thomas Cordova • VERNON’S HIDDEN VALLEY STEAKHOUSE Bob Tate • solo 6pm • FREE piano • 6pm • FREE THE COWGIRL BBQ , Santa Fe Cowgirl Karaoke hosted by ZIA DINER , Santa Fe Bluegrass Jam • 6pm • FREE • Michele Leidig • 9pm • FREE ALL -AGES! LIZARD TAIL BREWING Open Mic Jam Night • 6pm • FREE ZINC WINE BAR & BISTRO Felix y los Gatos • Americana, MARCELLO’S CHOPHOUSE Open Piano Night • 6:30pm • Creole funk • 8pm • FREE FREE MOLLY’S BAR , Tijeras Paul Pino & The Tone Daddies • WEDNESDAY DEC 24 6pm • FREE VERNON’S HIDDEN VALLEY STEAKHOUSE Bob Tate • solo THE BARLEY ROOM Karaoke with DJ Scarlett Diva • 9pm • piano • 6pm • FREE FREE BLACKBIRD BUVETTE Open Mic Night with Felix Peralta • TUESDAY DEC 23 7pm • FREE THE COWGIRL BBQ , Santa Fe Trevor Bahnson • folk • 8pm • BLACKBIRD BUVETTE Try vs. Try: Bi-weekly Open Mic • FREE 10pm • FREE MARCELLO’S CHOPHOUSE Tony Rodriguez • 6:30pm • CARAVAN EAST Samuel D. Band • country • noon • FREE • FREE ALL -AGES! MOLLY’S BAR , Tijeras Christmas Eve: Gene Corbin • CORRALES BISTRO BREWERY , Corrales Eryn Bent • indie, Americana • 4pm • FREE folk • 6pm • FREE MONTE VISTA FIRE STATION Blues Jam with The Memphis THE COWGIRL BBQ , Santa Fe Don Curry & Pete Springer • P. Tails • 8pm • FREE classic rock • 8pm • FREE RANCHERS CLUB Lindy Gold • piano • 6:30pm • FREE IL VICINO BREWERY CANTEEN The Fabulous Martini- VERNON’S HIDDEN VALLEY STEAKHOUSE Bob Tate • solo Tones • lounge, jazz • 6pm • FREE piano • 6pm • FREE a

[34 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [35 ] Dating WARNING straight dopE | advicE from thE abyss by cEcil adams

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i FREE CODE: Weekly Alibi r F For other feature, it wouldn’t do much to prevent 7 / For other local numbers call local numbers call 4 2 midnight toe-stubbings amongst the Cro- TM 1-888- 1-888 -MegaMates Magnons. Infrared vision, sure–but if you’re TM MegaMates 24/7 Friendly Customer Care 1(888) 634.2628 18+ ©2013 PC LLC www.MegaMatesMen.com 2508 hung up on how we could have evolved into some cooler, laser-eyed superspecies without that crappy moon holding us back, you’re not counting your evolutionary blessings. By team is the only thing keeping Mercury where it most accounts we wouldn’t even have developed belongs: Without us, its gravitational interaction vertebrae without the moon, let alone eyeballs. Dark with Jupiter would drag it into a high-stakes run-in nights would be the least of our problems. with Venus, which would likely result in Mercury’s Cosmologically speaking, Earth has been getting ejected from orbit and bonking into who extremely lucky. Our sun’s energy output has knows what along the way. It's too bad we couldn't remained relatively stable throughout much of the save Pluto too, but of course that was just politics.) evolution of life. Our orbit is safely in what’s called It creates tides. The moon's orbit used to be a lot the habitable zone, where a planet’s surface can closer to the Earth, thus generating much stronger, support liquid water. We’ve avoided being smashed higher tides. These waves left extensive tidal pools, to smithereens by comets, sucked into black holes, where the ocean’s primordial soup of amino acids or irradiated by supernovae. With all the hazards of and other organic compounds could be concentrated the universe in the way, the chances of life via repeated evaporation. Synchronization between developing on any planet are pretty small. It's fairly tidal flow and exposure to solar UV radiation may well established that the life-sustaining conditions have resulted in the petri dish necessary for life to found on Earth have been enhanced to some degree evolve. Tides were likely helpful too in the transition by its lunar companion; the only debate is about how of life onto land, depositing small organisms and much. Some of the more commonly proposed biomass into semiaquatic marshlike environments. benefits of moon-having: Evidence for all this is found in 3.5 billion-year-old It got rid of primordial pollution. The moon most stromatolites–stratified rock formed by ancient likely formed when some smaller planet struck Earth bacterial action–whose layers show the moon’s about 4.5 billion years ago, ejecting chunks of debris influence on the Earth’s spin rate and tides that eventually coalesced in orbit. Crucially, this throughout the early development of life. collision may also have stripped away a thick proto- It’s a steadying influence. In order for life to atmosphere that was trapping the heat of Earth’s develop on Earth, we needed stable temperatures molten surface. Without this rather violent and a regular climate. Variations of even one degree development, we might have ended up like Venus, in Earth’s axial tilt relative to orbit may have led to where life is only imaginable by Ray Bradbury. ice ages in the past. The moon, with its large mass, It keeps us toasty . This impact also contributed acts as a major stabilizing force on our axis (as well to the heating of the Earth’s iron core, which as helping keep us within the habitable zone). New Shows,New Lineup, provides us with our relatively strong magnetic field. Without it, we could have ended up like Mars, whose This in turn protects us from radiation (at least moons are much smaller and whose tilt may vary More Laughs,More Insight somewhat (see last week’s column on skin cancer)) over a span of 60 degrees. In the search for and solar winds. And the pull of the moon’s gravity extraterrestrial life, scientists regularly prioritize acts on every molecule on Earth, powering the tides planets with similar-sized moons attached. (see below) and creating additional heat, which With no moon, of course, our fates would be helps keep the core from cooling too quickly. drastically different because of the misalignment of It’s insurance against getting chucked into our astrological signs, but on the plus side we interstellar space. In the young and restless early wouldn’t hear any more about that lunar- years of a solar system, the gravitational force of cycle/menstruation myth. Would mooning still be the larger planets (read: Jupiter and Saturn) may popular? Would Pink Floyd still exist? These are interfere with the orbits of the smaller ones, questions that have not been subjected to the hard sometimes flinging them out of the system discipline of the sciences, leaving us to only imagine altogether. Computer simulations suggest that even the potential horrors in store. Missed opportunities if this had happened to Earth, the warming for night vision notwithstanding, let’s be grateful for properties of the moon's gravitation described what we have. above might well have kept temps high enough for water to remain liquid and for life to evolve anyway. Your new program schedule is available at KANW.com (Incidentally, other simulations have Send questions to Cecil via straightdope.com or write him c/o demonstrated that the presence of the Earth-moon Chicago Reader, 350 N. Orleans, Chicago 60654. [36 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI WEEKLY ALIBI DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 [37 ] Free Will Astrology | Horoscopes by rob brezsny

ARIES (March 21-April 19): “Too much happiness allowed me to improve my authorial skills. The stuff I can make you unhappy,” reported journalist Marta composed in the early years wasn’t bad, but I Zaraska in the Washington Post . Citing research by wouldn’t want to present it as my work any more. So psychologists, she concluded that being super-extra should I feel guilty that I got paid and appreciated for LOOK LIKE STEVIE NICKS—NOT! friend on the left but kept stealing looks at you, cheerful can make you selfish, gullible and more those old efforts even though I was less than Hair stylist at NE Heights salon. You were bragging occasionally you looked back. We spoke briefly as prone to stereotyped thinking. On the other hand, perfect? Did I get away with something I shouldn’t about looking like Stevie Nicks? Honey, you don’t you were leaving about the tape on lids of bottles she said, maintaining merely moderate levels of have gotten away with? I don’t think so. I was doing look like Stevie Nicks. You look like Bill that you both were carrying out. I should have happiness is pretty damn good for your mental and the best I could at the time. And even my unpolished Cunningham’s wife, Kim Brechka, with blue contact gotten up, walked across room and held door so we physical health. So here’s the takeaway, Aries: The astrological musings were helpful to many people. lenses. This isn’t a slam—it’s just a fact. may have chatted some more. I’d love to see you astrological omens suggest you’re due for a surge of Now, Libra, I invite you to apply these meditations to again and Marble would be a fine place to start! joy and pleasure. Just be careful it doesn’t spill over you own unfolding destiny. CITIZEN_KAY. I KNOW YOU/LOVE YOU! into rash, delirious excess. Here’s your watchword: You’re a manager at INTegrated ELectronics, aren’t CONFUSED well-grounded delight. SCORPIO (Oct. 23-Nov. 21): You may already know you? lol I’m really crushed in a way no one knows but me. I what I’m about to tell you. It’s a core principle at the never loved any woman like I love you. I truly love TAURUS (April 20-May 20): In the 19th century, root of your Scorpio heritage. But I want to focus THANKS FOR THE OATS. you Tanya, and when you told me you were in love the Grimm brothers gathered over 200 old fairy your attention on it. In the coming months, you’ll be Ever look at someone and swear you know that with me I believed you. You made me happy for the tales from a variety of sources and published them in wise to keep it at the forefront of your conscious person? Well that was me when I asked for your help first time in my life. But you also crushed me beyond an unprecedented collection. Many of their stories awareness. Here it is, courtesy of philosopher tonight. I’m blaming those eyes and perfect smile for belief. I’m not the one that hurt you in the past but are still popular, including “Cinderella,” “Snow White,” Friedrich Nietzsche: “You have it in your power to why I was speechless even when I tried to thank you I’m paying dearly for what others have done. I’m “Hansel and Gretel” and “Rapunzel.” Around the invest everything you have lived through—your before you went back to work. losing you, Tanya, the love of my life. I wish you same time they did their work, a storyteller named experiments, false starts, errors, delusions, passions, could see how true my love for you is! Franz Xaver von Schönwerth assembled his own your love and your hope—into your goal, with If I missed my chance to reconnect please don’t hold compendium of fantastic myths, fables and folklore. nothing left over.” it against me next time. If we indeed haven’t met BEAUTIFUL PUNK ROCK APD OFFICER Unlike the Grimm brothers’ book, his work faded into before I’m sure we’ll see each other sooner than DOWNTOWN obscurity. But it was rediscovered in 2011, and 500 SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): “A savage desire later and we’ll have our chance to introduce Holy Moly! Who is that raven haired APD officer lost fairy tales are now finding their way into newly for strong emotions and sensations burns inside me: ourselves. who was on duty downtown? Spiky punk hair, lips published books. I foresee a comparable a rage against this soft-tinted, shallow, standardized like sugar and eyes to die for. I’ve never seen such a phenomenon happening for you in 2015, Taurus. and sterilized life.” So says Harry Haller, the YOU NURSED ME TO HEALTH wondrous creature in this town. Much like an Forgotten stories will return. Raw material from the protagonist of Hermann Hesse’s novel Steppenwolf . After you stopped laughing, thank you for endangered doe, one rarely witnesses such a sight depths will resurface. Interesting news from the past His declaration could serve as an interesting point of bandaging my head when you saw me split my in this desert burg and carries the sight of one in will come flowing into the present. reference for you in the coming months, forehead open on the curb. I still see stars when I one’s heart for a long time. Sagittarius—not as a mood for everyday use, but as think about you. All I know is you just became a Be careful out there. The world needs beauty like GEMINI (May 21-June 20): Your first task is to a poetic inspiration that you periodically call on to nurse, so congratulations and I hope you don’t have yours to enchant the universe. ascertain the half-truth, the whole half-truth and invigorate your lust for life. My invitation has a to do wound care on me again. nothing but the whole half-truth. Only then will you caveat, however. I advise you not to adopt the rest of M4F @ CIRCLE K (PENNSYLVANIA AND be able to find the other half of the truth. I realize it Harry Haller’s rant, in which he says that he also has YOU AND A FRIEND WERE ENJOYING THE MENAUL) BY IHOP may be frustrating to use this approach. You’d “a mad craving to smash something up, a department BEER AT MARBLE BAR... We saw each other about 12:00 noon today as you probably prefer to avoid wrangling with deceptions store, or a cathedral, or myself.” You (brunette, petite and most easy on the eyes) walked by me getting gas. You had on a brown and misdirections. But I think it’s the only way to and your blonde friend were seated @Marble Carhartt coat and black pants—lookin’ damn good… jostle loose the hidden or missing information. For CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I have lived near an Brewery bar Thurs. eve, Dec. 11. I was next to your We should talk.. ;) best results, be a cunning and unsentimental open space preserve for five years. Up until the last detective who’s eager to solve the mystery. Don’t two months, it has been a peaceful, quiet place. But focus on finding fault or assigning blame. then the coyotes moved in. Just after dusk every evening, a pack of them start yipping and yowling in CANCER (June 21-July 22): One of the ingredients the distance. At first I found the racket to be eerie that makes yoga mats so soft and springy is the and unsettling. It activated some primal unease in chemical azodicarbonamide. The same stuff is added me. And yet the coyotes have never actually been a to the soles of shoes. There’s a third place where it’s problem. They don’t roam into my neighborhood and used, too: in the burger buns sold by McDonald’s, try to bite people or prey on pets. So now I’ve come Burger King, Wendy’s and other fast food joints. I’m to relish the situation: The wild things are close and not suggesting that you order a big supply of azodicarbonamide and ingest it. But I do hope you exciting, but not dangerous. I’m guessing this has a will consider the metaphorical equivalent: doing metaphorical resemblance to what your life will be whatever’s necessary to make yourself bouncy and like in the next six months, Capricorn. fluffy and pliable and supple and resilient. AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): Stanstead, Quebec, LEO (July 23-Aug. 22): “There are two kinds of and Derby Line, Vt., are really a single town that light,” said author James Thurber, “the glow that straddles the border between the US and Canada. illuminates, and the glare that obscures.” Lately you Many of the people who live there have dual have been an abundant source of that first kind of citizenship, but they’re still supposed to carry their light, Leo. The fire in your heart and the gleam in passports with them at all times. I suspect you may your eyes have not only brightened the mood experience a metaphorical version of this split in the wherever you’ve gone. They have also clarified coming months, Aquarius. You will be in a situation confusing situations, warmed chilly attitudes and that has a split down the middle or a seemingly healed dispirited allies. Thank you! In the coming unnatural division. Whether it turns out to be a weeks, I’d love to see you continue on your hot problem or an opportunity will depend on your streak. To help ensure that you do, keep your ego adaptability and flexibility. under control. Don’t let it pretend that it owns the PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): When a dead tree light you’re emitting. With a little introspection, you topples over in the woods, its withered branches may will continue to generate illumination, not glare. get entangled with the branches of a living tree VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Studies suggest that 57 that’s standing nearby. As years go by, the living tree percent of all people with access to the internet have must grow the best it can with the decaying wood engaged in the practice known as ego-surfing. This trapped in its midst. Has something like that ever modern art form consists of searching Google for happened to you? Are you still carrying the rot that mentions of one’s own name. This is a suspiciously other people have burdened you with? If so, the low figure unless we factor in the data uncovered by coming months will be an excellent time to get my own research—which is that a disproportionately disentangled. A tree isn’t capable of freeing itself small amount of Virgos go ego-surfing: only 21 from the dead weight of the past, but you are— percent. If you are one of the 79 percent of your especially in the first half of 2015. tribe who does not indulge, I invite you to remedy the situation. It’s an excellent time to risk exploring the potential benefits of increased self-interest and self- HOMEWORK: WHAT’S THE ONE FEELING YOU WANT TO regard. FEEL MORE THAN ANY OTHER IN 2015? TELL ALL: [email protected]. LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): When I started writing horoscopes many years ago, I was a good astrologer Go to realastrology.com to check out Rob Brezsny’s expanded weekly audio horoscopes and daily text message horoscopes. The but an unexceptional writer. Eventually, the practice audio horoscopes are also available by phone at (877) 873-4888 or of composing 12 packets of pithy prose every week (900) 950-7700.

[38 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI Place your ad: alibi.com [email protected] “Smooth Move”—about to be pulled on you. Cla ssified (505) 346-0660 ext 258 by Matt Jones

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[40 ] DECEMBER 18-24 , 2014 WEEKLY ALIBI