THIS WAY OUT SENIOR SENDOFFS PAGE 10

VOLUME XLII, ISSUE LX THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 WWW.UCSDGUARDIAN.ORG );+W]VKQT :(=05.;/,.96=,:;<+,5;*6<5*03*<;:36::,::/<;:+6>5,(;,9@ Nurses 0QZM[

By Regina Ip Strike Associate News Editor After medical A week after A.S. Council first THE END administrators reject met to appoint the 2010-11 associ- After 24 years on campus, the ailing Grove Cafe ate vice presidents, one of the three proposed staff increases, remaining positions is still unfilled — will close its doors for good. By Ayelet Bitton leaving the council to enter next year union prepares to react without a full cabinet of 10 AVPs in with protest. charge of managing various aspects of student life. By Connie Qian On May 26, the council voted Senior Staff Writer against appointing A.S. President Wafa Ben Hassine’s nominations for three Over 11,000 nurses from five AVP positions. The nominations of UC medical centers — including the former Campuswide Senator Desiree UCSD medical centers — will strike Prevo for the AVP of Academic Affairs on June 10 to protest unsafe nurse- position, and former AVP of Local to-patient ratios, the National Nurses Affairs Aries Yumul for the AVP of United announced last Friday. College Affairs position were voted “One of the things we’ve been ask- down, while the nomination of ing is that the [nurse-to-patient] ratio Eleanor Roosevelt College sophomore should be maintained at all times,” Arohi Sharma for the AVP of Student UCSD Medical Center - Hillcrest reg- Advocacy position was tabled. istered nurse Janice Webb said. “We’re On June 3, the council approved asking for break-relief nurses. That’s a Prevo and Sharma to temporarily fill nurse that comes in and watches your the Academic Affairs and Student patient while you’re on break.” Advocacy positions, respectively. The protest, slated to be the largest They will carry out the AVP posi- JOHN HANACEK/GUARDIAN nurse strike in U.S. history, will also tions until Week Four of Fall Quarter include an additional 14,000 nurs- at which point applications for the es from and Minnesota, position will reopen. BY THE NUMBERS totaling 25,000 participants. The position of AVP of College $177,920.78 GROVE CAFE’S TOTAL DEBT California law requires hospitals Affairs was not discussed and will not $925 DAILY PROFIT GROVE NEEDS TO BREAK EVEN to maintain at least one nurse for be filled until Fall Quarter. 2 NUMBER OF DAYS, SINCE REOPENING, GROVE EARNED $925 every three to five patients, depend- ing on the care the patients receive. According to Ben Hassine, all $525 AVERAGE PROFIT GROVE MAKES DAILY three positions were tabled at the The union said it wants to mandate stronger enforcement of these laws Campus Affairs committee meeting, n less than two hours last night, the A.S. Council voted 17-2 to and establish safe ratios at all times. which is held prior to the council shut down the Grove Cafe, effectively ending a 24-year saga that According to Webb, the medical meeting. From that, the Academic included numerous attempts to revitalize the struggling eatery. Affairs and Student Advocacy posi- I centers do not have enough nurses to The decision comes a year after the previous council voted last June attend the patients. tions were pulled out of committee to to continue operating the coffee shop, which was $140,000 in debt at “We’ve been having meetings be discussed at the meeting. the time. However, despite ongoing renovations and a much-hyped with hospitals that say they already Ben Hassine said the positions reopening this Winter Quarter, the business has increased its debt over have charge nurses, but realistical- were tabled — and then voted down $35,000, to a total of nearly $180,000. ly they can’t maintain the ratio on — because councilmembers dis- According to both Vice President of Finance and Resources breaks,” she said. “A lot of times when agreed with the process of choosing Andrew Ang and Associate Vice President of Enterprise Operations the charge nurses [or nurses who members for the selection commit- Brian McEuen, the Grove would need to make a daily profit of $925 to supervise] watch, there are still more tee. The selection committee consists cover its operating costs alone. However, since reopening in January, of the president, the outgoing AVP nurses needed — just someone to and three to four council senators. See GROVE,page 7 help out.” However, in an online statement, See AVP,page 7 the UC Office of the President con- tended that such a strike is without legitimate cause. FROM FML “The university considers this TO FLOWERS action unlawful, a violation of good- faith bargaining requirements and a A crowd of clear violation of the parties’ con- students gave tract,” UCOP said in their statement. flowers to Mary, The strike will also attempt to an employee at the secure the nurses’ retirement benefits Burger King in to make sure neither politicians nor Price Center East, the health industry can easily rescind yesterday. The them. event began “The other thing we’re concerned because of a post about is the pension and our health benefits,” Webb said. “Things are get- on UCSDFML.com ting expensive now, and they’re trying that brought to look at ways to cut costs. That’s attention to Mary’s going to affect people, and we want PHOTOS BY ANDREW OH/GUARDIAN work. See NURSES, page 3

>,)7633:762,5:762,5 -69,*(:; :<590:, 50./;>(;*/50./;>(;*/ :<9-9,769;:<9-9,769; .(:7,9.(3365 05:0+, LOW SHOULD THE A.S. THURSDAY FRIDAY *VTPJZ COUNCIL HAVE CLOSED 5:41 A.M. Height: 5-6 feet Height: 5-6 feet $2.79 5L^)\ZPULZZ THE GROVE CAFE? THURSDAY FRIDAY Wind: 2-6 mph Wind: 1-8 mph ARCO, Poway H 70 L 60 H 72 L 62 THURSDAYTHURSDAY FRIDAY FRIDAY Water Temp: 66 F Water Temp: 66 F 12805 Poway Rd & Carriage Rd ;OL@LHYPU8\V[LZ √ Yes :<5:,; HIGH :\TTLY4V]PL7YL]PL^ √ No SATURDAY SUNDAY :LUPVY:LUKVMMZ √ I don’t know Height: 6-7 feet Height: 6-7 feet $3.86 SATURDAY SUNDAY Wind: 2-9 mph Wind: 2-7 mph 76, Point Loma *SHZZPÄLKZ WWW.UCSDGUARDIAN.ORG H 74 L 63 H 73 L 62 7:53 P.M. SATURDAY SUNDAY 1704 Rosecrans St. & Nimitz Blvd. Water Temp: 66 F Water Temp: 66 F :\KVR\ 2 THE UCSD GUARDIAN THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 NEWS

POORLY DRAWN LINES By Reza Farazmand

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4VUPJH)HJOTLPLY General Manager (SMYLKV/=PSHUV1Y Advertising Art Director 9VI*VYLH Marketing Team Leader ,]HU*VVR Network Administrator Business Assistant ;PMMHU`/HU Advertising Design and Layout )YHUKVU*O\,]HU*VVR2PT*VVWLY Distributors :HS.HSSHNVZ:JV[[/H]YPZPR ;OL <*:+ .\HYKPHU PZ W\ISPZOLK 4VUKH`Z HUK ;O\YZKH`ZK\YPUN[OLHJHKLTPJ`LHYI`<*:+Z[\KLU[Z HUK MVY [OL <*:+ JVTT\UP[` 9LWYVK\J[PVU VM [OPZ UL^ZWHWLY PU HU` MVYT ^OL[OLY PU ^OVSL VY PU WHY[ ^P[OV\[ WLYTPZZPVU PZ Z[YPJ[S` WYVOPIP[LK   HSS YPNO[Z YLZLY]LK ;OL <*:+ .\HYKPHU PZ UV[ YLZWVUZPISL MVY[OLYL[\YUVM\UZVSPJP[LKTHU\ZJYPW[ZVYHY[;OL]PL^Z L_WYLZZLKOLYLPUKVUV[ULJLZZHYPS`YLWYLZLU[[OLVWPU PVUZVM[OL<*:+.\HYKPHU[OL

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ERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN First Row: Copy Editor Kelsey Marrujo, Staff Writer Brianna Lee, Staff Photographer Yvonne Heaney, Design Editor Emily Ku, Editorial Assistant Zoë Sophos, Staff Illustrator Rebekah Hwang, Senior Staff Writer Yelena Akopian. Second Row: Training and Development Manager Maria Sokolov, Focus Editor Edwin Gonzalez, Associate Opinion Editor Cheryl Hori, Staff Writer Jasmine Ta, Associate Hiatus Editor Arielle Sallai, Staff Photographer Andrew Oh. Third Row: News Editor Hayley Bisceglia-Martin, Staff Writer Arik Burakovsky, News Editor Angela Chen, Associate News Editor Regina Ip, Associate Focus Editor Neda Salamat, Copy Reader Anita Verghis, Associate Photo Editor John Hanacek. Fourth Row: Hiatus Editor Jenna Brogan, Photo Editor Erik Jepsen, Editor in Chief Simone Wilson, Opinion Editor Trevor Cox, Managing Editor Reza Farazmand, Associate Hiatus Editor Matthew Pecot, Associate Sports Editor Liam Rose, Associate Sports Editor Matthew Croskey. Back: Managing Editor Alyssa Bereznak, Sports Editor Vishal Natarajan. Not Pictured: Art Editor Christina Aushana, Associate News Editor Ayelet Bitton, Associate Design Editor Melody Chern, Associate Focus Editor Aprille Muscara, Art Editor Philip Rhie, Editorial Assistant Connie Qian, Web Editor Sari Thayer NEWS THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 THE UCSD GUARDIAN 3 +W]VKQT+WV\QV]M[)>8 =+78"6]Z[M;\ZQSM ,MJI\M.QVITTa+TW[M[/ZW^M I+WV\ZIK\>QWTI\QWV s the clock struck 6 p.m. Finally, the familiar debate over ▶ NURSES, from page 1 and the chairs around me the Grove Cafe arose for the last the ability to negotiate with them A creaked with the late arrival time in its tumultuous, 24-year his- when they decide.” of councilmembers, my first foray in tory. In a move parallel to last year’s According to Webb, the California the world of A.S. Council officially similar debate, members spent about Nurses Association recently present- began. an hour debating the relative merits ed UC medical centers with a resolu- The meeting began with an of the eatery and whether it was the tion to the problem before resorting emotional public input period. The council’s responsibility to keep the to a state-wide strike. incoming Movimiento Estudiantil space open despite its thrice-failed “We didn’t come up with a cook- Chicano de Aztlan Chair, Mar business plan and growing debt. ie-cutter program,” Webb said. “We Velez, urged the council to side AVP of Enterprise Operations made a recommendation based on with MEChA Brian McEuen each unit, what type of patients and take a stand and Vice they have. We actually had a well against the con- New President of thought out plan, and we’d like to troversial Arizona Finance and give it a try and enter a contract immigration Businessss Resources so that way we’d actually be able to bill by passing a RUBA AKEL Andrew Ang — enforce the plan.” thursday and Saturday, resolution that [email protected] who jointly spon- Webb said that the UC medical condemns the sored the legis- centers would benefit if more nurses   Arizona legislature. lation to close the Grove — both were brought in to care for patients.       Following last week’s associate argued that the Grove would not “There are all these issues they’re vice president appointment drama cover from its nearly $180,000 debt having at all hospitals in California, $3 student, $5 general — where the council tabled or voted and that closing the business would such as patients falling,” Webb said. down every candidate fledgling cut the council’s losses. “Break nurses can help out with that A.S. President Wafa Ben Hassine The council only paused for a kind of stuff — the little things that         nominated for AVP positions — for- brief respite in their discussion of kind of fall through the cracks when mer AVP of College Affairs James the Grove to charge a committee people are on breaks.” Lintern offered his advice as to the to find other business options to She added that improving the most responsible way to decide on replace the area. nurse-to-patient ratio is a necessity AVP candidates. Ultimately, in a decision opposite in order to maintain quality care in summer The resolution on the Arizona that from last year, councilmembers the medical centers. student rates bill returned to the forefront of decided that keeping the Grove was “People deserve more time to take council, with repeated objections not fiscally responsible and voted a deep breath,” Webb said. “You can’t KLGJ9?= voiced by former AVP Academic 17-2 to close the business by June 30. really work that well if you’re not going 5x5 $25 per month Affairs Jordan Taylor regarding the Council then moved on to to have enough time to gather your wording of the resolution and its rel- New Business, where it passed a thoughts, especially in this difficult 5x6 $28 per month evance to UCSD students. resolution in support of the Iranian field of work. You need it to give the Campuswide Senator Victor Non-Violent Student Movement for patients the good care they deserve.” 5x7 $30 per month Flores countered Taylor’s argu- Democratic Reform, which affirmed UCSD Health System spokesper- ments and said the resolution was the council’s support of the Iranian son Kimberly Edwards claims the pertinent to all students. He pointed Green Movement fighting for human medical centers do not know what 5x8 $34 per month out that any student at UCSD who rights. actions they will take in response to With student ID. Daily pro-rate available to Sept. would visit Arizona — Grand As I packed my bags, I made a the strike. OTHER SIZES AVAILABLE Canyon roadtrip, anyone? — could mental note to bring snacks to the “It’s too early in the process for be stopped by police if any suspicion next meeting — especially when speculation, financial or otherwise,” over his or her legal status arose. food enterprises are up for discus- she said. scrippsmesastorage After a lengthy discussion, the coun- sion. cil ultimately passed the resolution So stay classy, avid A.S. Council Readers can contact Connie Qian at Call for reservation 858-566-3881 condemning the bill. followers — I’ll see you in the fall. [email protected]. 4 THE UCSD GUARDIAN THURSDAY

We’ve tried, throughout this year, to redo ŇœŐŎġŕʼnņ [the media guidelines], and essentially not fund [the Koala]. I don’t know if ŕʼnņ ġņťŪŵŰųŪŢŭġŃŰŢųť it’ll get rid of them, but on the part of A.S.,

WE CAN DEFUND THEM Œ THE ONLY WAY the masses can change money-minded policy up Śņłœ top is if policymakers feel their security legitimately threatened by — we absolutely can defund them, and I a group of unified, reasonable individuals. believe we must defund them.” September 28, 2009 UTSAV GUPTAA “Don’t Just Walk Out: Tune in and Wake Up” PRESIDENT, 2009-10 A.S. COUNCILL February 25, 20100 Ŋŏ A LESS-ACCESSIBLE and therefore more privatized public univer- “Media Orgs Defend Free-Speech Rights”” sity not only contradicts its founding principles, but it also hurts California’s chances of bouncing back from its financial dilemma. October 1, 2009 “AS A MINORITY STUDENT who sym- “We’re Broke, But the Kingdom Gates Are Golden” “ pathizes with the students that have been affected by the recent issues on A.S. COUNCIL has never demonstrated itself to be a particularly campus, I am distraught to know thatt effective decisionmaking body — why leave them in charge of I have unintentionally added to their something as important as getting to and from campus? pain.” ŶŰŵŦŴ October 15, 2009 ANONYMOUSS “Push Comes to Shove: We’ve Got to Shell Out” March 1, 20100 “Noose in Geisel Was Not Intendedd OUR 1968 FORAY into the football arena resulted in seven con- as a Threat”” secutive losses and no wins. We pulled the plug that year before embarrassing ourselves any further — and if forty years have made “THEY HAVE GONE where they should “SURE, WHAT I SAID taken out of us any wiser, we’ll keep doing what we do best. not have gone, and I believe we should context may be seen as horrible. But October 29, 2009 respond appropriately. I don’t believe you have to understand that it’s in thee “This Motley Kickoff Won’t End in a Touchdown” it is the chancellor’s role to shut the context of trying to raise the debate, university down, and I believe would trying to raise awareness. Right now, DESPITE ANY ILLUSIONS of a “public comment period” the regents it be difficult for her to do so. I believe there’s only one side of the issue — decided on this fee increase a long time ago. There is not a chance it is our role to do that.” it’s just BSU yelling at us. There is in hell they’ll compromise the prestige of our university or make IVAN EVANS another side of the issue, which is more faculty cuts to keep student fees low. UCSD SOCIOLOGY PROFESSOR that everyone is overreacting.” November 12, 2009 March 1, 2010 KRIS GREGORIANN “Drop the Picket Signs for a Higher-Flying Hope” “Shut It Down: Third Racist Incident EDITOR IN CHIEF, THE KOALAA Sends Protesters Into Chancellor’s February 22, 20100 THE IDEA behind this particular party was obviously birthed from Complex” “When Liberties Collide”” a lifetime of Lil Jon videos and Dave Chapelle stand-up — with which the droning, hyper-academic Dimensions of Culture reader “YOU CAN’T IMAGINE how pained we apparently couldn’t compete. are over this. We are heartsick.” February 18, 2010 PENNY RUE “Time for a Sit-Down” VICE CHANCELLOR, STUDENT AFFAIRS [GUPTA] MADE THE DECISION so students will understand the March 1, 2010 potential consequences of their angry requests — but that’s not “Shut It Down: Third Racist Incident worth ... the jolting precedent it sets: casually cork the student Sends Protesters Into Chancellor’s voice when things get too noisy. Complex” February 22, 2010 “Stopping the Presses Won’t Heal the Hurt”

WHEN A CORNERSTONE OF SOCIETY like the black population, whose presence at this university means exponentially more than its sparse percentage, feels so threatened as to not be able to enter their own library, it becomes all of our problem. March 1, 2010 “Look Up: You’re Part of the Problem” “I’M NOT SAYING that they don’t have the right to freedom of speech, but

THERE’S NOTHING TO DECODE and no need to devote any thought where’s my right to be protected fromm ġġġġġġġġġġġġ to figuring out what’s going on aside from trying to remember the that?” lyrics to that other Drake song. GRANT WHITE April 1, 2010 FRESHMAN, MARSHALL COLLEGE WE BELIEVE ART “‘What Ever Happened to the Thrill of the Hunt?” February 22, 2010 “When Liberties Collide” IS NOT A CRIME. NO FUTURE PRESIDENT will ever get as much done as Gupta ... The We also believe that it is important only way Ben Hassine can achieve similar levels of productivity is to to bring to the foreground the crisis unite councilmembers so they can get shit done together. that is part of the border, and to hold April 12, 2010 accountable those communities that “Trash All Allegiances — The Work Starts Now” just let people die in an unconsidered way.” UNLESS YOU’RE a Student Center groupie, chances are you haven’t RICARDO DOMINGUEZ set foot in a co-op since you were required to buy an obscure UCSD VISUAL ARTS PROFESSOR Marxist textbook a few quarters back. April 12, 2010 April 22. 2010 “Prof. Faces Scrutiny for Hacking “Co-ops Can’t Stay a Student Center Secret” Into UC Web Site”

EVEN IF the resolution must be re-proposed each quarter, we hope its language can become clear enough to address the true wrongdo- ings in question ... and promote enough open-air hubbub to foster the kind of informed interest this topic deserves. April 29, 2009 “With Roundabout Politics in Play, No One Leaves Happy”

IT WILL ONLY GET WORSE as time goes on, and the memory fades ... according to Bramwell, the administration will continue to push harder and harder for the festival to take place on a Saturday — and lord knows it will only take are a few spineless councilmem- JOHN HANACEK/GUARDIAN bers to let that happen. May 13. 2010 “The Taming of the Beast: Sun God’s Sobering Fireside Tale” “IT IS NOT ANTI-. Israel was “MY COMMUNITY IS feeling threatened, very cleverly kept out of it.” and we’re feeling unsafe. One thing I “ IF MEMBERS of Tritons for Israel are upset about how Justice in RISHI GHOSH would like to urge is that this is not a Palestine Week presented the facts of the conflict, we encourage MEMBER, DIVESTMENT FOR PEACE pro-peace resolution.” them to take equal advantage of the student fees at their disposal INITIATIVE DAFNA BARZILAY and plan an event of their own. April 26, 2010 PRESIDENT, TRITONS FOR ISRAEL May 27. 2010 “A.S. Resolution Draws Criticism April 29, 2010 “In a Campuswide Debate, Silence Is Futile” from Pro-Israel Groups” “Council Delays Decision on Human Rights Violations” ILLUSTRATIONS BY PHILIP RHIE/GUARDIAN

THESE DAYS, 30 bucks for a quick thrill is YOU’LL FIND LEOPARD SHARKS hanging IT’S A DIAMOND among all those mysteri- THOUGH YOU’LL HAVE TO STOMACH Old ŇŐńŖŔ steep — especially when there’s no physi- out by the La Jolla Beach and Tennis Club ous Convoy St. gems, existing for what Town’s faux cowboy décor to get to the cal contact involved. At the Scream Zone and sea lions guarding the entrance to the seems to be a sole purpose of letting dim-lit corner store, its vast inventory — at the Del Mar Fairgrounds, you’ll squeal, caves. And with the rush of tourist sea- patrons get sloppy drunk and sing like from strawberry blends to $65 boss-man you’ll moan and you’ll get your black and son coming to a close, you might just get they were in the privacy of their own picks — make it worth the neighbor- ŔŪŵŦŴ orange undergarments in a twist, guaran- them all to yourself. shower. hood’s tortilla-plastered streets. teed (maybe even moisten them). KERRY FUGGETT ADONIS RELIEVE APRILLE MUSCARA November 9, 2009 November 30, 2009 ALYSSA BEREZNAK ŔŦŦů October 26, 2009 La Jolla Ecological Reserve J Music Studio February 8, 2010 The Scream Zone Churchill Cigar Lounge JUNE 3, 2010 THE UCSD GUARDIAN 5

What sort of gesture do you want? I’ve done two gestures. We actually took a pay cut before ŕʼnņġŚņłœġŊŏ everybody else in June, and another pay cut in September. These are gestures. It’s below market. ġőŦųŴŰůŢŭŪŵźġńŰŭŶŮůŴ The chancellors had to do the same thing — it was a gesture.

FORGET THE OBVIOUS economic benefits of making FOOTBALL DOESN’T MATTER AS MUCH as the city of HOW MANY GESTURES one $30 grocery trip for healthy, fresh food rather New Orleans itself, but it helps people take their than what might amount to three separate $10 bur- minds off of more sobering realities. Sometimes rito runs on a daily basis — I was equally excited everyone needs a distraction from the bigger pic- DO YOU WANT?” by the fact that my soon-to-be cooking skills would ture.” MARK G. YUDOF instantly make me more attractive. After all, what’s JOE TEVELOWITZ PRESIDENT, UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA sexier than a home-cooked meal? CUP O’ JOE October 5, 2009 VISHAL NATARAJAN January 28, 2010 “This Is Your President” KITCHEN ACCOMPLISHED “The Right to Victory Is Paved With Uncertainty” October 5, 2009 “THIS IS A UC SCHOOL. This is a state “ “Drop That Onion Ring — Toss Your Own Salad” LIL WAYNE HAS MADE a lot of questionable choices school. This isn’t Stanford. This is not — the bindi tattoo, to begin — but Feb. 2’s Rebirth Yale. This isn’t Harvard. We shouldn’t THE ART OF a sexy Halloween costume is in match- is a UFO-sized cowpie to potentially outstink the have to pay that much. It was designed to ing a lopsided cloth-to-skin ratio with some wit. lingering charms of all nerdy hiccups past. Ever be top-notch education affordable for all On principle, Winnie the Pooh without pants is wonder what Kid Rock would sound like with a people, particularly California residents infinitely sexier than a girl in her bra and pant- mouthful of pokey grillpieces and Auto Tune on — and it’s not meeting any of those stan- ies claiming to be a Victoria’s Secret model. Never lock? Lust no longer, for the abominable white- dards. They really need to rethink why underestimate the brainstorming power of a trash blackman has been unleashed. the UCs were created, and they need to go Google image search. SIMONE WILSON back to that original goal.” HOW-TO GURU STRAIGHTER THAN NARROW LAUREN DIDLY October 22, 2009 February 4, 2010 SENIOR, ELEANOR ROOSEVELT COLLEGE “This Hallow’s Eve, Beat Spandex Mediocrity” “Weez-Bird Done Bad” “TO STUDENTS: I’M SORRY, I regret it, January 11, 2010 but the state has stopped building the “Can’t Make the Cut” TELLING STORIES is the closest you will ever get to SOMEHOW, in attempting to make a sustainable highways to higher education — they’ve being a god. Ultimately, you are interpreting life. choice, I’d added Typhoid-ridden Fijians to my started building toll roads.” “[THE REGENTS] DON’T GIVE A SHIT. They Fear and love, our most primal emotions, are the list of day terrors. Now I wish I hadn’t lost the MARK G. YUDOF didn’t even look at us during public com- storyteller’s most effective weapons; pull the right trendy Whole Foods canteen my mom got me for PRESIDENT, UNIVERSITY OF CALIFORNIA ment. What does that say?” punches, and people became putty in you hands. Christmas. I’d buy myself another one, but those September 22, 2009 VICTOR SANCHEZ How on Earth do you think the Bible managed to things are like $25. “‘Toll Roads to Education’” PRESIDENT, UC STUDENT ASSOCIATION hold up for so long. ALYSSA BEREZNAK November 19, 2009 PHILIP RHIE SEMI-CONSCIOUS CONSUMER WE GOT TASED and pepper-sprayed for “You Pay More” CRITICAL HIT! April 8, 2010 doing a protest for our education. We October 22, 2009 “Is That a Guilt Floatie in Your Water Bottle?” were forced out of the deliberation room. “AFTER NEGOTIATING FOR university “One Gamer God’s Case for Turning to Comics” That cannot be done. I got a gun taken lecturers for 25 years and now for librari- I START GETTING ANNOYED, and pray Blue Devils out on me. People are being physically, ans, I’ve realized that the UC administra- FISHER STARED AT ME for the longest two seconds fan will shut up. Unfortunately, there isn’t an app mentally and emotionally hurt right tion cannot be approached with rationale of my life, motioned down with his eyes and said, for that. I decide to to ESPN’s ScoreCenter now.” at the bargaining. [It is] not a rational “Normally, I at least have my pants on.” Apparently, app. We finally discover that the score is 56-55 STEPHANIE DE LOERA institution.” you’re not supposed to prod players for interviews Duke, and I think to myself: “FML for missing this UCLA SOPHOMORE MIKE ROTKIN while they’re only wearing a towel. Lesson learned. game. November 19, 2009 CHIEF NEGOTIATOR, UC-AFT LIBRARY JAKE BLANC MATT CROSKEY “You Pay More” UNIT BLANC ON BASE MATTER OF FACT March 11, 2010 October 26, 2009 April 8, 2010 “Librarians Negotiate for Higher Pay” “One Night With the Pros” “On the Road, iPhone Comes Through in the Clutch” THERE’S MOMENTS WHERE people are I WOULD TAKE the criticism of ‘caging’ DON’T TELL US that we can hate the Yankees, but crazy. There’s moments where it’s more Sun God to not have someone get hurt at we have to like Derek Jeter. We don’t like Derek EVER DO BLOW with Maradona and want to tell me cerebral. There’s moments to focus on a a festival I was in charge of.” ALEX BRAMWELL Jeter, and no matter how many times Joe Buck and what it was like? technical thing — me scratching — or Tim McCarver verbally fellate him, we will not like LIAM ROSE ASSOCIATE VICE PRESIDENT, A.S. on a political statement…versus, OK, Derek Jeter. And again, he allegedly has herpes, and ROSE PARADE CONCERTS AND EVENTS now we’re just going to smash our heads he allegedly gave those herpes to Jessica Alba — May 13, 2010 April 26, 2010 against the wall: Here’s some Metallica.” and she was hot, but now she allegedly has herpes “It’s Here” “The Return of the Great Messi-ah” DJ Z-TRIP too. Screw you, Derek Jeter. May 13, 2010 JOE TEVELOWITZ & CAMERON TILLISCH I SCRATCHED THE SHIT OUT of my sister’s copy of “Sun God Preview: DJ Z-Trip” CUP O’ JOE & TASTE O’ TILLISCH Meteora by playing it on infinite repeat. I like to November 2, 2009 stay in my little musical nest, all comfy and familiar. “Four More Reasons to Hate on the Evil Empire” MATTHEW PECOT OFF THE RAILS WE STILL HAVE TEAMS that can provide us with excit- April 29, 2010 ing memories. We just have to go to their games and “Jonesin’ for a New Sound” stop complaining about what we don’t have, because you never know when you might become victim of a AND WHAT DO WE — employees of a measly college scandal as treacherous as “Sonicsgate.” trough — get in return for such overwhelming hos- JANANI SRIDHARAN pitality? … Out of all of them, two cups of coffee. PEANUTS & CRACKERJACKS Small ones (on a good day). November 5, 2009 ALLISON GAUSS “Take a Note from Brutal ‘Sonicsgate’ Fiasco” BEHIND THE COUNTER

ERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN May 17, 2010 THE MOM FASHION SITE [www.mymomthestyleicon] “We Reserve the Right Not to Serve the Elderly” THE FEELING OF BEING on the mound [at the end] was phenomenal. It was like things is evidence that, once upon a time, our mothers happened in slow motion. Just the first person view of Kellen [Lee], who is a brother to strived to be emblems of fashion. They strutted ON MOST OTHER CAMPUSES, the baseball players me, running at full speed at me with his arms out was something I will never forget.” their stuff, just like you and I — some maybe even would be celebrated as heroic student-athlete gods, GUIDO KNUDSON at UCSD, checking themselves out in Geisel’s mir- negotiating crowds of adoring students everywhere JUNIOR PITCHER, BASEBALL rored walkway. they went. Here, senior first baseman Brandon May 17, 2010 KELSEY MARRUJO Gregorich ... is about as anonymous as the next “Repeat Champs” THE SURF REPORT pre-med major. November 9, 2009 VISHAL NATARAJAN I AGREE THAT PAYING RENT is a part of WE HAVE NO FUNCTIONAL OFFICE space “Scrunchies or Not, We All Have a May 20, 2010 the learning process, but what we’ve or meeting place. There is no public Little Closet Shame” “Wake Up UCSD — Your Baseball Team is the Best learned is that we can’t do it.” space where we can display our projects. in the Nation” SARAH LATOSKI We can’t put anything on the shelves [in BUT EVEN IF THEY’RE SPOT-ON in their judgment, EMPLOYEE, FOOD CO-OP the SRC]. We can’t put anything on the and the bookstore’s trash bins are one InterVarsity HERE’S WHAT I DON’T LOVE about old friends: the April 15, 2010 walls. We can only be there at certain flyer lighter for it, a part of me — a small, shame- fact that those unbearable weirdos can now view “Can They Get a Free Ride?” hours. We’re forced to run our programs lessly attention-starved part — sort of wishes my Pandora stations at will. At will! That means with no central locations.” they’d still hoist their little promotional scraps at whenever they want. I’m not saying I have anything ONE OF THE THINGS about KSDT is that RISHI GHOSH me anyway. Because as much as it may suck to be to hide, but I don’t exactly go around advertising since we’re students, we have horrible DIRECTOR, STUDENT SUSTAINABILITY halted six times on the sprint to Pepper Canyon the fact that I still listen to Cursive. Beacause I collective memory. Every four years, it COLLECTIVE Hall, there’s no downer quite like being greeted by a don’t. I swear. gets completely erased.” January 21, 2010 Korean barbequer’s furtive glance at his feet. REZA FARAZMAND MEREDITH WONG “Locked Out” TREVOR COX HEAD MEETS GROUND GENERAL MANAGER, KSDT AT WIT’S END May 27, 2010 November 16, 2009 January 11, 2010 “Get Out Now: The Internet’s Hit List “KSDT’s Hunt for a New Wave” “It’s a Long Trek to Class — Solicitors Still Welcome” Spares No Man”

TREES DROWN IN MIST. Silence. Acorns HEIGHTENED MELODRAMA takes itself A FILM THIS UPLIFTING, this strangely THIS IS ABOUT VIOLENCE, sex and kick- ʼnŊłŕŖŔ fall like gunfire on the roof of the too seriously, never pausing long disarming, this relevant and even time- ass American good guys in Paris’ grimy cabin … Holy shit, is that deer walking enough to have real emotional impact less, is enough to make an audience cry streets. Even plot holes go down easier around with a stillborn hanging out of — and with maudlin, score-driven and laugh at the same time (just when with a fistful of coke and a quart — or ŃŰŹ its uterus? scenes orchestrated to draw out phony you thought happy-sad must be a pro- in this case, a liter — of blood.” MATTHEW PECOT feelings, it’s almost hard not to feel motional myth), and sometimes simply NEDA SALAMAT November 5, 2009 used. stare in a stupefied hush. February 4, 2010 “Antichrist” AMANDA MARTINEK SONIA MINDEN “From Paris With Love” ŐŧŧŪŤŦ November 19, 2009 December 3, 2009 “The Blind Side” “Up in the Air” 6 THE UCSD GUARDIAN THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 OPINION

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PACIFIC BEACH 4595 Mission Bay Drive San Diego, CA 92109 858-273-1717 Call our friendly professionals for more information! CLOSEST STORAGE TO UCSD www.sdstorage.com NEWS THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 THE UCSD GUARDIAN 7 +W]VKQT+ZMI\M[+WUUQ\\MM\W-`XTWZM7\PMZ*][QVM[[>MV\]ZM[\W:MXTIKM/ZW^M +W]VKQTUMUJMZ[ ▶ GROVE, from page 1 the fiscal performance of the Grove.” employees feel a lot of ownership Centers and replace the cafe with a the business has only made an aver- The decision to shut down the over the space, and that’s fantastic. I new business venture. +ITT+WUUQ\\MM age of $525 each day. Grove came on the heels of the coun- would have no problem with that if it “Our A.S. Council has the poten- “I would say that the whole pro- cil’s repeated efforts to make the was a self-sustaining venture, but it’s tial to grow so much,” President Wafa ;MTMK\QWV*QI[ML cess and attempt to revitalize the business profitable. This year, for- not. It’s a liability for the Associated Ben Hassine said. “We are a new Grove failed,” Ang said. “It was a mer VP of Finance and Resources Students.” council and we have yet to see our ▶ AVP, from page 1 good effort, and there were plans, Peter Benesch and former AVP of Ghosh added that the sense of potential. At least for the time being, I “There was little bit of miscom- but at the moment there is definitely Enterprise Operations Rishi Ghosh proprietorship the student manag- think we should hold off on handing munication that was cleared up with nothing else we can do. It’s too much began plans to make over the cafe ers feel may have compromised their over the space.” a few individuals,” Ben Hassine said. in debt for us to really do anything with renovations to the facilities, new ability to operate the Grove as a busi- However, the Grove’s contract “A couple of the senators may have right now.” equipment for the kitchen area and a ness. states that its space agreement is con- felt that the selection process was McEuen said the cafe was closed reopening event — costing approxi- “I would say that there’s definitely tingent upon it offering “limited food biased or unfair.” because its high debt and competi- mately $6,000 — that offered free a reluctance from the student work- service.” Thus, if the council were to According to current AVP of tion decreased the likelihood that it food for four days. ers to think critically about the issues replace the Grove with a different Student Advocacy Chris Cruz, coun- would bring in the necessary profits “There’s some basic [facing the Grove] and business, the contract would be termi- cilmembers claimed that Ben Hassine to operate sustainably. simple things that could to actually reform them- nated regardless. formed the selection committees in “We are subsidizing the Grove,” be changed about the selves,” Ghosh said. “I Upon the Grove’s official June 30 a biased manner. They claimed that McEuen said. “To cover the debt, business model that could think they were much closure, the space will be returned to Ben Hassine never replied to e-mails we would need to make over $2,000 make the Grove a profit- happier without any University Centers. As a part of the requesting to serve on the selection a day to cover our debt next year. able, if not at least self- As an A.S. and sort of accountability to vote to close the Grove, the coun- committees, which lead to a loaded With all the coffee and sandwich sustaining business ven- as a business- themselves or the general cil created a committee — proposed committee. Ben Hassine claimed the businesses on this campus, that’s not ture,” Benesch said. “For “ student body.” by Campuswide Senator Elizabeth miscommunication was due to the lack owning entity, going to happen.” that reason, I argued for The Grove’s lack of Elman — to discuss potential alter- of staff, who would have otherwise The legislation to shut down the keeping the Grove open it’s fiscally prominence on cam- native business ventures that could responded to the requests. Grove — which was sponsored by this past year. Myself and irresponsible pus is represented by replace the Grove’s in its current She declined to state the names of McEuen — called for the eatery to Rishi [Ghosh] put in an for us to keep a survey councilmem- location. However, such propos- the aforementioned councilmembers officially close on June 30. In order incalculable amount the Grove.” bers conducted Winter als would require approval by the since the meeting was closed-session, to close the venue, the council must of time to revitalize the Quarter, after the University Centers Advisory Board which means councilmembers cannot pay the unresolved debt with money Grove, but the enterprise ANDREW ANG reopening. Of the 1,600 and University Centers administra- disclose specifics to the public. from its reserve funding and other is still failing and there’s VICE PRESIDENT OF students who partici- tors — a lengthy process that requires “None of us had staff and [the enterprise income. The council has really no help for it.” FINANCE AND pated, 42 percent said significant market research. e-mails were sent] during the transition yet to develop an official debt repay- Ghosh said that, RESOURCES they do not go the Grove The committee to explore alter- period,” Ben Hassine said. “That’s why ment plan, but will no longer need to despite all the efforts, the and 24 percent said they native enterprises for the Grove will a lot of the e-mails weren’t responded account for extra Grove expenses in Grove still experienced do not know about the consist of three council members, to but, traditionally, that doesn’t really its official 2010-11 budget. a significant decrease in sales that Grove. and will report its findings within the happen.” A few councilmembers were con- he believes can only be attributed Ang and McEuen used these sta- first two weeks of Fall Quarter 2010. Ben Hassine added that disagree- cerned that the council’s quick deci- to embezzlement or poor customer tistics, combined with the Grove’s Councilmembers who supported ments arose over the nominees’ quali- sion neglects the Grove’s long his- service. decreasing sale numbers, to urge closing the Grove said they hope to fications for the position. tory. Former A.S. President Utsav “I cannot think of any rational councilmembers to vote to close the instead focus efforts on the A.S. store, “Many senators felt that a closer Gupta released a statement on the explanation of this apart from some- cafe. which will be opening next year. evaluation of AVPs’ qualifications was A.S. listserv two hours following the one skimming money off the top “I know a lot of people will be “As an A.S. and as a business-own- necessary before they’re appointed their decision, condemning the council’s of the accounts to the point where voting on what was, but please sepa- ing entity, it’s fiscally irresponsible for respective positions,” Ben Hassine said. actions. they’re taking out a large percent of rate from what was and look to the us to keep the Grove,” Ang said. “We’ll For example, Sharma said council- “The Grove has been a campus the money,” Ghosh said. “It’s also like- future,” Ang said. “It’s been failing also be opening the A.S. store next year, members preferred another candidate establishment for over two decades,” ly that people weren’t coming back and it’s going to keep failing. Do we so we also have to divert our resources for the Student Advocacy position. Gupta said in the statement. “The due to poor customer service.” want the debt to grow to $200,000, there, to an enterprise that will most The council will reevaluate AVP council moved to eliminate it in a Benesch and Ghosh agreed that $250,000 or over $300,000? Look at it likely be successful and one that will applicants when the application peri- little over 24 hours. There was no Grove’s current student-run business from a financial point of view.” not have the financial downfall that the od reopens during Week Four of Fall public input offered through public model was another major factor in Only two council members voted Grove has right now.” Quarter. forums, I doubt anyone who worked the Grove’s failure. not to close the Grove, saying that at the Grove was notified, and there “The Grove kind of operates on they hoped instead to hold off hand- Readers can contact Ayelet Bitton at Readers can contact Regina Ip at was no committee process to review the co-op model,” Benesch said. “The ing over the space to University [email protected]. [email protected]. 8 THE UCSD GUARDIAN THURSDAY, JANUARY 21, 2010 WWW.UCSDGUARDIAN.ORG/HIATUS

TONIGHT 40(¸)VYU-YLL¹ Tired of studying for finals? *OYPZ[PUH(N\PSLYH¸)PVUPJ¹ International Club and I-House are hosting a Bon-Voyage dance at 8 (YJHKL-PYL¸;OL:\I\YIZ¹ p.m. in the Loft. Alcohol will be boss ditties 1HJR1VOUZVU¸>OLU03VVR,,2 ,TPULT¸5V[(MYHPK¹ HCiONTACTATUS THE EDITOR: [email protected] My Life Is SUMMERPREVIEW IV IVÅVi\e IN THE SUMMERTIME 8TIyTis\ WHEN THE

his sounds like it was ripped off a pseudo-punk pin from Hot Topic, T but I have to admit: music is my WEATHER IS FINE life. Deny it all you want, but it’s all of ours, really. The melancholy strums You’ll have enough spare time to enough to enjoy of Nick Drake are the soundtrack to grueling all-nighters; “Telephone” fuels a couple blockbusters and an LP or two.

Dodging thethe FILMS Horizon ALBUMS ARIELLE SALLAI [email protected]

espionage, Dom Cobb (DiCaprio) sneaks into his weekend Four Loko binges; Dookie victims’ dreams, stealing coveted ideas and inven- recalls that middle school punk stage INCEPTION tions that could “transform the world and rewrite which took too long to grow out. all the rules.” To save himself from the loveless life TOY STORY 3 It provides the soundtrack to nearly JULY 16 of a fugitive, he takes on one last job. This time, every moment of our lives. Personally, instead of filching, he must cause an “inception” JUNE 18 I’ve spent hours crafting the perfect s if exposing us all to the psychosis of the Joker — planting an idea in someone’s head. With such a mix for important moments of my life. wasn’t enough, “The Dark Knight” director confusing plot, it’s clear that Nolan won’t be giving ifteen long years after its inception, For my senior prom, I made the A Christopher Nolan wants to put us through us any helpful hints. Pixar/Disney is finally releasing the ultimate ‘80s playlist, just so I could some more mind-fuck. Between its cryptic title, stealth marketing F third installment of the “Toy Story” drive around in a limo through San With “Inception,” Nolan posits us in an M.C. (the first trailer was void of dialogue) and top- franchise on June 18. The pressure of liv- Francisco to the Talking Heads. As a Escher world of optical illusions. City roads fold up secret script (the actors could only read it in ing up to the recognizable film series is a freshman, I burned the new songs I like origami; buildings collapse; Joseph Gordon- Nolan’s office), “Inception” will be way overdue crushing one —but the tested brilliance of scavenged from Limewire onto CDs Levitt charges down a pinwheeling corridor, defy- come its arrival on July 16. screenwriter Michael Arndt (“Little Miss for my friends. They called me “the ing gravity. — Leila Haghighat Sunshine”) promises a film worthy of the Mix Master,” and it gave me a big fuck- At the forefront of a new form of corporate Senior Staff Writer “Toy Story” name. ing ego. Since many of the trilogy’s original These days I still make endless followers are now clambering into dilapi- mixes for whatever scenario I might XTINA TRADES RETRO SOUL FOR POSEUR HIPSTER BEATS dated cars headed off to college, the film find myself in: the hazy trip to Las sets its sights on higher education. “Toy Vegas, the long, summer nights I lot has happened in Xtina’s life Story 3” follows its audience’s growth as spend talking to my best friend in the since her last release, 2006’s Back Woody’s longtime owner Andy sets off street, the windy drive through the A to Basics. She’s settled down with 3 for university. A mix-up leads Andy’s back roads of my hometown. There’s her manager, popped out a kid and Bionic mother to believe that the toys — except the perfect song for every moment and become an actress. RCA Woody — are garbage. Woody’s attempt to it is my mission to find it. (Just so you But despite any signs of maturation, 10 rescue his fellow playthings lands them in know, for the aforementioned events Aguilera’s latest is an overproduced ode a daycare. Fed up with the sticky-fingered I’d pick “Combination Pizza Hut and to clubbing, boozing and boys — sprin- familiar, and for good reason: Aguilera co- rampage that ensues, the gang devises a Taco Bell” by Das Racist, “Range Life” kled with a few out-of-place moments of moth- wrote “Bionic” with M.I.A. and collaborated plan to escape the plastic-plush prison and by Pavement and “Ocean Breathes erly reflection in a return to her “” roots. with Santigold producer Switch on the latter reunite with Andy. Salty” by Modest Mouse, respectively.) On slow jam “Sex for Breakfast,” Aguilera to churn out a pair of thumping imitations — Though the overarching separation When music can define an entire croons she “wants you deep inside of me,” fol- which almost make up for a complete lack of anxiety is fairly typical of a “Toy Story” portion of your life, it’s even better, lowed up by a 20-second interlude of her two- originality with sheer danceability. film, the nuanced nostalgia it inspires in its as my fellow editors and I proved last year-old son imitating mom’s trademark belt- There is, however, one consistent selling aging audience will be sure to inspire Rex- weekend. Delving through the depths ing. (Good thing the kid’s too young to under- point in Aguilera’s jumbled treatise on mother- sized tears from parents and graduating of my iPod, we uncovered the perfect stand any noises from the parents’ room.) hood and getting laid. Xtina’s booming vocal seniors alike. With animation that shines driving songs for our perilous trek Other, less-than-subtle low points include range is on full display throughout, including brighter than that of its 1995 predeces- to the Anza-Borrego desert. Vintage a botched attempt at flaunting girl power on on flopped first single “.” sor, “Toy Story 3” is bound to be another fare was the fitting request, so my adolescent anthem “,” on which By final cut “Vanity,” though, even those pipes adventurous romp through Toyland, and classic rock collection banged against Aguilera spouts banana innuendos to a too- can’t save Aguilera from the revelation that this hopefully will prove to be as lovable as the the looming mountains as we blasted common drumming beat. self-proclaimed bad bitch is past her prime. first two. Bowie and gleefully belted “Ch-ch-ch- In fact, even Bionic’s shining moments — Trevor Cox — Neda Salamat ch-changes!” (“Elastic Love,” “Bionic”) sound a little too Senior Staff Writer Senior Staff Writer It didn’t stop there. After Ranger Sue shut down our impromptu rager — which consisted of blasting raunchy JULY 13 hip-hop long past quiet hours — we M.I.A. switched to beatboxing. (Nothing will ne thing M.I.A. knows is that ever top our campfire remix of “The controversy sells. To prepare Lion Sleeps Tonight.”) And when we MAYA O for her third album, Maya, the discovered a giant portable speaker in superstar released a gruesome music a latecomer’s car, it was like finding an video — an 8:56 minute slaughter- oasis in the barren landscape, spark- fest of gingers — to accompany ing an early morning dance party and “Born Free.” A political statement, a Beatles-fueled siesta when the heat maybe, but so graphic it was banned proved too powerful. from YouTube. Stirring up even more As the music nerd that I am under- uproar, after a New York Times report- paid to be, the moments I associate er wrote an unflattering feature that with a song are clearly significant. claimed her political shtick was unau- While a good conversation and the thentic, M.I.A. turned to her to desert scenery flashing by as I drive defend herself, saying, “I’ll [be] taking are just as important in memory, calls all day bitches,” which was followed music plays a vital role too. On top by the writer’s phone number — ouch. ven if you’re not a of the amazing hikes and completely M.I.A. has described this newest member of Oprah’s belligerent nights, last weekend album as “schizophrenic,” which aptly E Book Club, you’ve EAT, PRAY, LOVE will always play back in my head to describes “Born Free” and “XXXO” — probably heard of “Eat, ’s “Time for Africa (Waka tracks dominated by chaotic beats that Pray, Love” — the New York AUGUST 13 Waka).” underpin M.I.A.’s breezy style. “Born Times bestseller that docu- And I’m not the only one who Free,” in particular, has M.I.A. going in ments a woman’s yearlong trip abroad, spent traipsing in three countries and orchestrates her life soundtrack. There a decidedly punk direction, layering her escaping a midlife crisis. Naturally, Hollywood recognized the novel’s matronly are others out there who swoon at rhymes with an unrelenting bass line. If following for its cash-cow potential. Starring the talented — yet, far too beautiful the thought of blasting “Bittersweet she continues the controversy, come July for the role — Julia Roberts, the film promises to be this summer’s token chick Symphony” on the open road, and 13, people will definitely be talking about flick. But before you dismiss it as 2010’s “Mamma Mia!” consider two things: there are certainly others who worry M.I.A. — whether the album actually deliv- Robert Richardson, the visionary behind “Inglourious Basterds,” “The Aviator” over the perfect playlist like I do. So ers or not. and “Kill Bill” is director of photography, and Javier Bardem … ’nuff said. own up to your obsession, geeks: I — Imran Manji — Jenna Brogan gave up on my pride years ago. Staff Writer Hiatus Editor HIATUS THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 THE UCSD GUARDIAN9

ARCADE FIRE SPLICE THE SUBURBS STARRING ADRIAN BRODY, SARAH POLLEY AUGUST 3 DIRECTED BY VINCENZO NATALI RATED R 1:04 ou’re walking through an inde- pendent record store, flipping idly Y through some 12-inch singles, searching for the obscure artists your hipster heart desires, when — all of a sudden — you stumble across a sleeveless record, blank except for one very impor- tant band name. It’s the new single from Arcade Fire. You have just struck gold. That’s exactly how the Montreal band has packaged the new tunes from their forthcoming LP, The Suburbs. When the first record turned up at a shop in Glasgow, the Internet exploded with buzz over the new tracks, and inevita- bly, the single and B-side — “Suburbs” and “Month of May,” IT’S ALIVE! IT’S A MONSTER! IT’S ... NOT THAT EXCITING. respectively — have been leaked. “Suburbs” is typical Arcade Fire fare: n an interview with The Natali is best known for the 1997 stands the disturbed reasoning that’s Dren from their company. Slow, melodic piano builds over the gen- Guardian, director Vincenzo psychological thriller “Cube,” and been going on in Elsa’s head, his The movie’s full of faux emotion- tle strum of acoustic guitar as frontman I Natali calls his sci-fi horror flick “Splice” has moments of disturb- reaction is one of the few moments ally charged moments, like Clive Win Butler spews his best imitation- “Splice” “an exploration of inner ing insight that would put Freud to where “Splice” lives up to the emo- trying to drown an already choking Springsteen lyrics about growing up in space instead of outer space … it’s shame. But other than those scant tional-horror label. Dren and — surprise! — it turns the heartland. Meanwhile, “Month of emotional horror.” instances, the characters are flat, Not to say that the film is with- out Dren can breathe underwater. May” offers a curiously aggressive rock Unfortunately, that emotion bouncing between dull extremes of out its purported tender moments. Elsa, thinking he saved their pseudo- sound — more befitting Queens of the leaves the audience wondering just tenderness and psychosis. Elsa is the “It’s really a mother-daughter daughter from choking to death, Stone Age than the reserved Arcade where this inner-space exploration typical smothering mother, while story,” Natali said. “The primary asks, “How did you know?” Clive Fire. It seems strange, but hot damn, it was supposed to be headed. Clive is the responsible scientist who relationship in the film is Elsa and just shrugs, and that’s about all you actually works. The film follows scientist couple spouts off about how they crossed Dren.” can do too. Still, compared to the moments of Clive (Adrien Brody) and Elsa a line creating Dren in the first That dynamic would have “Splice” does have moments pure brilliance on their previous record- (Sarah Polley) as they experiment place. It’s no better when they switch come through a little more if where it goes deeper than the sur- ings, the new tracks don’t quite measure with creating hybrid animals for soapboxes halfway through the film; “Splice” took the time to estab- face. In the end, the characters don’t up. Then again, it’s a hard task to follow medical purposes. The couple cre- they’re just flat in different ways. lish such details. Instead, viewers have any more depth than before, two nearly perfect albums; let’s just hope ates Dren (Delphine Chanéac), The script’s tentative explorations are railroaded through a series of but the effect is so bizarre that it sets The Suburbs has a few more gems in beginning a Frankenstein-esque tale of ethical questions — like why Elsa abrupt revelations: Elsa had a bad “Splice” apart from other creature store. as Dren rapidly grows from a small would create and raise Dren — show relationship with her dead mother. shockers. — Arielle Sallai kangaroo/rat into a sentient almost- that it’s trying to live up to “Cube”. In Aforementioned dead mother had — Matthew Pecot Associate Hiatus Editor human with a stinger tail. addition, when Clive finally under- a farm. Clive and Elsa need to hide Associate Hiatus Editor

UC SAN DIEGO N.UCSD.EDU 2010 SIO ES S R E M M SUMMER U S S AB L ANGUA         L G E S SESSION ALBUM RELEASE RES DON'T DELAY, THU :mk`oYddY PARTY! TU ENROLL o'Ha_]gfBg`fJY^l]j 9pm TONIGHT! C TODAY! JUNE 3 E L Courses are filling up. See the Schedule of Classes Da ^!]gfl`]JgY\Lgmj on TritonLink. MON KY_]>jYf[ako'dan]ZYf\$>j]] JUNE 7 EgjYd9_]flk ^]YlAc]qGof]k SESSION I BEGINS 9pm g^l`]EYjkNgdlY!:&

For more info contact the Summer Session Office (858) 534-5258 or e-mail Follow us on [email protected] >GJEGJ=AF>G 0-0&,0)&0),(ooo&Z]ddqmh&[ge ),+K;]\jgk$KgdYfY:]Y[`;91*(/-*)GN=J  JUNE 3, 2010 UCSD GUARDIAN LaSENIOR SENDOFFS s HURRA

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ERIK JEPSEN/G KELSEY MARRUJ COPY EDITORt$0-6./*45 enerally speaking, I loathe camping. Yet somehow, I found myself in the middle of the damn desert last Frida over that papery tent material while I listened to stumbling drunks sing a co G These others — were they kidnappers? Hooligans? Reality TV producer Try a group of UCSD journalists whose existence was unbeknownst to m SIMONEJOHN HANACEK/GUARDIAN WILSON EDITOR IN CHIEFt."/"(*/(&%*503 )*"564&%*503t%&4*(/&3 alf a decade ago, on regret the day they decided to with skill. Guaranteed. Keep keep- H Wednesday of Week 10, apply. I wish I could sit back and ing it real, and come 2013, you too I was already dreaming savor their pain with some fine could be spraying Four Loko off of this day: The Last Production. boxed wine. But my state of sober the hood of your Corolla in the Outgoing Guardian pillars like (sort of) stress today is a testa- 7-11 parking lot. Grant, Vlad, Ian and Cody — ment to the over-involved, often To the rest of the incomers: gods in my eyes — were drowning psycho grip with which I run the Your work this quarter has sur- their seniorities in some Arrogant Guardian. For the good of every- passed my wildest expectations. Bastard while I sat miserable in one, it’s my time to move on. Hayley: You’re the strongest writer my fugly attempt at a Summer All through Fall Quarter, there on staff. Read more Esquire, and Movie Preview design. I bush- was a knot of worry in my gut you’ll be downright bomb. Arielle: whacked blind through a first-ever that UCSD’s official newspaper You’re an angel, and you know round of edits; meanwhile, then- wouldn’t be equipped to uphold your shit. Keep my baby classy. Hiatus Editor Cody blasted SoCal its history of greatness next year. Neda: Focus, but never let go of pop-punk (the Bouncing Soles, About one month after meeting Hiatus — it suits you. Cheryl: who still hold a special place in incumbent Editor in Chief Angela You’re the glue, and that’s every- my iPod) and proceeded to get so Chen, though, it had disappeared thing. Take more photos, but sloshed he barely got his album completely. Angela: Because of demand more massages. Regina: review in before dusk. you, I will be able to take on my You surprise me every day. Keep My only consolation was that, future without looking back with it up. Liam: You’re my favorite. one day, it would be me in the fear or regret. You never deserved Especially for standing up to us party hat. an eye-roll— not even once. You’re when we’re assholes. Masha: I It’s tradition: The restless crew the most open, honest learner I’ve never thought strict could be so of outgoing seniors is supposed encountered at this school; you lis- sweet. Enforce the schedule like to get drunk and stumble around ten, you’re never overconfident or I never could. Melody: Have fun the office the last day, jeering defensive, and you ask questions. with that shit. I secretly want your the incoming editors until they For that, you will be rewarded job. Trevor: Come ▶ PAGE 14  st AH REZA FARAZMANDERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN

1014*$-&45"/% here is something profoundlyy MANAGING EDITORt/&84&%*503 T different about newspaper people. Resilient, unpredict- "440$*"5&/&84&%*503t$"3500/*45 able, dangerously curious and decid- edly unconcerned with their own up more than I will ever know to me. Don’t let that go to your head, know. well-being, they are a breed designed be a part of this organization, these though. To Angela and Hayley: My girls. for action. They work strange hours people — who I am honored to call To Simone: You are something I am so proud of how far both of and harbor strange habits. They my friends — have made every sec- new — raw, unyielding, completely you have come this year. Thank deprive themselves of food, sleep, ond entirely worth it. committed to the rejection of you for sticking it out, rising bril- social interaction and anything else To Charles and the rest of the old any and all things conventional. liantly to the task and being the best indicative of a sane human exis- guard (Rael, McCardle and Hadley): Arguing with you is like arguing damn news writers this paper has tence. They admire efficiency. They You guys took me in, brought me with a tiger that coughs a lot. For seen since that guy Reza graduated. abhor waste. They are egomaniacs up and made me feel at home here. that, I love you, and I can’t stress You’re going to do a phenomenal — admittedly vain, overly ambi- Charles, you taught me how to be enough how great a job you’ve done job next year. I know we’re leaving tious, disgustingly self-confident and critical of everything, and for that I as chief. I would sing like Justin in capable hands. completely self-aware. In private, cannot thank you enough. Rael, you Bieber if I thought it would make To Trevor: If I had to pick 12 they are idealists. In public, they are are the chillest son of a bitch around, you happy. people to be in my ultimate party vocal skeptics, averse to the flowery and I am confident that — had I To Phil: You are my brother. You crew, you would be number six. bullshit of rhetorical activism and never met you — I would be a con- give life to the bizarre things in my To Kelsey: I am jealous of your UARDIAN entirely unimpressed by the self- siderably lamer person. head. You inspire me to be a bet- copy-editing skills. sustaining fanfare of institutional To Jesse, Kim and Yelena: We ter artist. You are one of the most To Cheryl and Arielle: Road- politics. They are the most loyal of were the news crew. I could always talented creative minds I know, and trip posse for life. Please play good JO friends, the most critical of enemies depend on you for quality reporting, it has been an absolute joy to work music at production next year. and the most prolific of shit talkers. much-needed moral support and with you this past year. And we’re To Vishal: My method is still They are up-front. They are real. cutty back-room sessions. just getting started. superior. Put that in your pipe and They tend to look pretty haggard To Alyssa: Although I am the To Emily: You have never once smoke it. most of the time, but they wear it single most talented writer in the failed to amaze me with the work And to all of the rest of you who well. world, I cannot find the words on you produce. I don’t know how you have shaped my experience at the ay, crumpled in the fetal position Over the last four years, I have Thesaurus.com to describe how do it, but you are an endless pool Guardian: Thank you for being the onfused version of the blues. had the immense pleasure of being much your friendship means to of artistic skill and deadpan humor zaniest, hardest-working, most over- rs? surrounded by newspaper people for me. There is no one else I would rolled into one tiny, twirling, dash- the-top crew of intellectual misfits me my first two ▶ PAGE 13 the majority of my waking moments, rather have spent four years on tastic bundle of awesomeness. LOST. I have ever known. Being around and a few too many of my non-wak- the Guardian with than you. You To Edwin: Fuck you, bitch. You you has made me a more complete ing moments. Though I have given were a better managing editor than are the funniest motherfucker I person. ALYSSA BEREZNAK MANAGING EDITORt01*/*0/&%*503 '0$64&%*503t"440$*"5&'0$64&%*503 y time at the Guardian has other parts of my life fall apart. going to be you plus me plus hot sake M been somewhat of a real- Besides maybe inserting the word this Friday — and many NY outings life nightmare. In my four- “poopy” into an editorial a couple to come. year career as a writer and editor, I weeks ago, I have no regrets. I know Sari and Shida: It might not seem have endured far too many Redbull- what’s important to me now, and like much, but the fact that you read fueled all-nighters, faced countless 3 that’s all I ever really wanted from what we write every week means a.m. disasters and lived beneath the college. I’m also guessing that, after a lot. Thanks for being the perfect rainy cloud of a perpetual deadline. thousands of hours of slave labor at distractions — without all those In fact, the only time I’ve ever really an understaffed publication, I will dance parties and delicious dinners, I been able to escape the G is when I’m probably never have to work this would’ve overdosed on Guardian. asleep. But like I said, I don’t sleep hard again in my life. Reza and Simone: I’ve tried not very often. Now for shout-outs: Matt M., to spew Sun God-esque affection this Still, as I reminisce about my when I first joined, your infectious whole sendoff, but what the hell. I monotonous academic career at laugh and epic parties made me love you guys. Reza, you’re my trusty UCSD, it was usually the only good drool with admiration. Hadley, now coworker and friend, and I will always reason to be awake in the first place. that I’ve worked with you, I know I appreciate how well you handled me Not to rag on all my lit/writing cours- can work with anyone. Dave, thanks breaking your tooth. I’m going to es, but the terrifying gaze of 20,000 for adopting Focus when it needed miss being shady and jaded with you. undergraduate eyes sort of scared a no-fluff parent most, and for the Simone, my Guardian recruiter me into improvement. Instead of a leopard couch. We still need to visit and yearlong companion: There comfy workshop circle to test out my that beehive. were many Winter Quarter moments ideas, there was just a crowd of ruth- Trevor, since you survived that where you could’ve settled for a less twentysomethings ready to say Wedge nightmare, I’ve always know slightly shoddier paper, but you never “You suck.” So thanks, even if you’re you were one helluva trooper. Hayley, did, and I’ll admire you forever for it. the most noncommittal Guardian thanks for not quitting after I stood No matter how much time we spent reader — my fear of your judgment you up at 6 a.m. last year. Cheryl, I together, I never really got sick of you has made me better at my job. wish you could massage me until the (that’s my way of saying you rock). The way I see it, if it weren’t for end of time. Angela, girl, you da boss If you ever consider launching your this paper, I would still be writing now — ’nuff said. Emily, I love your fuckup career on the East Coast, I’ll bad poems in my Moleskin, waiting droopy office dance. Vishal, I’m mak- make sure to scope you some sturdy to graduate so I could move on to ing the Jamaican horn sound for you cardboard boxes. In the meantime, undefined bigger, better things. The as I type. Kelsey, you’re cute enough take good care of Clubby for me. Guardian has taught me to live in to rival some big-time YouTube Newbies, I can’t wait to see what kitten videos, and you’re a really you’ve got. It’s all in your hands now. ERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN the moment in the most intense way possible — even if that means letting dedicated worker to boot. Edwin, it’s Make me proud. 12THE UCSD GUARDIAN THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 SENIOR SENDOFF JAKE BLANC MATTHEW SPORTS EDITORt$0-6./*45 CROSKEY should start learning karate as I am overjoyed to be done I now. Or maybe Jiu-Jitsu. with college and start some new Hell, even Tae Bo would adventures, I’m actually pretty be a step in the right direction. sad to say goodbye to the people After four years of talking some and experiences that made my serious smack, I’m graduating, time here so great, and a lot of and I have to stop hiding up in that credit needs to go to the best the ivory tower of my Guardian damn newspaper in the country. columns. This means that the I got my start with the many people I offended — most- Guardian as a sports writer when ly Dodgers and Yankees fans, but two high school friends and also fair amounts of pro-Israel, former sports editors — Rael Obama-loving, Prius-driving Enteen and Danai Leininger — middle-class elites — would love convinced me to start writing. a chance to share their “opin- Those first articles covering the ions” with me in person. bottom of UCSD’s sports totem JOHN HANACEK/GUARDIAN I’m not too worried about poll got me going, and for four taking on the folks angered by years, I wrote as much as I could ASSOCIATE SPORTS EDITOR my progressive politics, but I do get my hands on. As a sopho- not want to meet a pissed-off more, I felt comfortable enough would like to raise a toast: past first, second and third edits — New Yorker in a dark alley. to branch out into other sections. To the Guardian and its staff. I couldn’t be happier. I Guardian In any case, the time has By my senior year, I had hit the Without you both, my final My journey with the finally come to leave the proverbial Guardian cycle: hav- year on this campus would not have has evolved from a sports writer’s Guardian, UCSD and Southern ing written for all five sections. been as kick-ass as it was. As I sit in e-mail relationship to a full-fledged ERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN California behind. As much Too many ▶ PAGE 14 this muggy office at 2 a.m. — long bromance as the ▶ PAGE 14 JENNA BROGAN HIATUS EDITOR ilm critics know that every good ment realm, then revoke my title. F movie has a good ending. Don’t Truth is: If the rhythm moves me, I’m worry, I won’t spoon-feed you a going to dance. I don’t need some Rolling load of a crap about happily-ever-afters, Stone writer to tell me what music I like. but I will say this: After four years of toil- If Sandra Bullock’s Oscar win for “The ing over quotations, semicolons and em Blind Side” is any indication, fame is little dashes, I’m going out with a bang. more than a popularity contest. If you told me four years ago that one Every time I walk into an AMC, I day I would be Hiatus editor, I would find myself wondering: What happened have laughed in your face. I never spoke to Hollywood? Sorry, but book adapta- up at newspaper meetings, my favorite tions, remakes, substance-empty chick film is “Little Miss Sunshine” and I may flicks, recycled Michael Bay-splosions or may not have symptoms of Bieber and five “Bring It On” sequels do not fever. But before you judge me, I’ll bet count as innovation. even A.O. Scott taps his foot when- Is a well-developed storyline, visually ever Britney Spears comes on the radio. stunning cinematography, witty script, Honestly, when did pretension become multidimensional characters, actors such a redeeming quality? who are right for the roles (not simply If always agreeing with the Academy’s hired for their entertainment value) and picks for best films of the year makes you an overall message that really makes us an authority in the arts-and-entertain- think too much to ask? ▶ PAGE 14 ERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN 0MTXQVO0IVL[

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ERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN WEB EDITOR got sort of tied up at work today. The server crashed, Lights and Sirens was spammed and the Web poll peaced out because it wasn’t getting enough love. I www.ucsdguardian.org For the full story, check the Web exclusive at . JOHN HANACEK/GUARDIAN

the dog and Masha’s passive-aggressive ."336+0 post-its telling everyone to lay off our computers’ balls. Original sports editor EDWIN GONZALEZ ▶ FROM PAGE 10 Jake and his successor, Vishal: You both years of college. One winter’s day in have a Disney prince-like charm that FOCUS EDITOR 2009, they noticed my sloppy copy- always makes me mosey (extra slowly) t"440$*"5&)*"564&%*503t$0-6./*45 reader application, jerked me into the past the sports office. Alyssa, you are taying in San Diego wasn’t the However, I’d be lying if I said that at turning out headlines amazes me. nearest swivel chair, handed me some truly superwoman, showing the world S god-awful decision I imag- the Guardian was the only thing that I’m honored to end my tenure with new-hire paperwork and stamped a big, that we UCSD kids can work hard and ined it’d be. In my defense, I’d made these last four years so amaz- you at the helm. Alyssa and Reza: invisible “G” on my forehead. I was in. party hard, no sweat. Edwin, you’re the already spent 18 years here before ing. I have others to thank too. The managing office was by far my I had no idea how to assimilate. It master of dance, sloshball and sex jokes everyone else showed up. And during To Mom and Dad: Thank you for favorite, and not because of the beer took a full weeks to realize that “copy” — how can I be cool like you? Hayley that time, I’d firmly decided I didn’t your continued love, support, Triton closet in the corner. Sake’s on me this meant me. I’d miss a million AP mis- and Angela, I’m always amazed at your like the ocean, Shamu nor short- Cash and text messages that I know Friday, but only the first cup. takes. One of my first news grabs ended politeness, apologizing whenever you sleeved shirts. take five minutes to type. I love you To News, the girls who stroked up in a blubbering phone call to then- ask me to copy read something (aka do Don’t get me wrong — not every- so much. Adriana: I still read the let- every ligament of my musical ego: news editor Reza because my contact my job). Reza, you better believe I will thing’s changed. I still don’t care for ter you typed on my (then-new) lap- Much love, and many nights filled wasn’t calling me back. (Bitch.) be spicing up your Facebook once a the ocean, or Shamu. But I’ve come top from time to time — the one in with the best of the ’80s. Hiatus: My That low-key anxiety attack sud- week now that I can’t bombard you with to terms with San Diego; if only electric green. And yes, I remember alma mater and the greatest section denly made me a part of the Guardian cheer in person anymore — and last but because the last four years have been pretending to be beached mermaids to write for — hands down. Thanks in-crowd. After initiation, I came to never least, Cheryl, you could make a worth all the salt water in the world. lost at shore. Next year’s going to be for putting up with my leftovers, and understand the people behind the titles: Guardian gossip zine with your endless Like other exhausted interests, amazing. Trust me. the eight weeks that they rotted there Simone, you are the most empower- knowledge. I know it’s creepy, but I want journalism was something I picked To Rah: I know I’ve told you this for. And Sports: May your lives be ing woman, keeping us in check but to keep you in my pocket forever. up on a half-whim. Film came before before, but there’s no one I admire a never-ending series of Jamaican still embodying the edginess of Ke$ha In a nutshell, I’ve been in love with it. Matter of fact, film was the reason more. I can’t wait to visit the obe- Horn moments. 24/7. Trevor, my favorite, how can you the Guardian for a year. So much that I started writing for the Guardian in lisk again. To Carmina and Yedid: Emily: Words can’t describe write poetry, place articles, eat sand- I slept with bugs, peed in a bush, ate a the first place. It took three applica- Thanks for letting me be your little the magic you conjured up, every wiches and play deejay on YouTube barely cooked hot dog, listened to scary tions (ahem, Simone), but because of brother, and for convincing me my Sunday, to turn Focus into art. And simultaneously? My section, I’m so stories about Toys R Us and got bitched it, I spent the next three years of my Spanish wasn’t as terrible as it was. to Aprille, Neda and Zoe: You were proud of you guys for breaking out of out by Sue the park ranger for blasting life swallowing NoDoz three times a And now, for Guardian folks. To three of the most talented associates copy’s stereotypical wallflower persona, Julie Andrews last weekend — yet some- week. Needless to say, it was the best Ke$ — sorry, Simone: How someone I had the fortune of working with. what with Monica’s requests to chain up how, I would do it all over in a second. decision I ever made in college. could be so silly, sexy and damn good The pleasure was all mine.

It’s your world, we’re just baking in it.

    +=1/I#3EE+ B3?2I I&:<<391   + tax Valid for dine-in & take-out. Add toppings for a nominal charge. Must show valid student id. ):;.>?:-5G> 9?/=(+=>3?D Not good w/other offers.  '%I+8<@>IA/9?   )/.9/>.+D +DI II # #=3-/I/9?/=I)/>?I+67=:;8

+A391I+I#+=?DI //?391I:=IA/9? 9A3?/I'>I)/G66I=391I&2/I::. "=I)/I+9I:>?I*:@=I=:@/=A/I%<+-/ I!:I"=./=I&::I31 !/B #+-303-I/+-2I :-+?3:9 I+=9/?IA/I!/C?I?:I&=+./=I:/G> (:?/.I I  HIB::.>?:-5><, -:8 %+9I3/1:G>I />?I#3EF+ "=I(3>3?I@>I39I?2/I%%'I:66/1/I=/+ DI3?D,/+?II    I6I+4:9I6A. HI I   HIB::.>?:-5>>. -:8 +36DIE?/-I$/+./=> 14THE UCSD GUARDIAN THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 SENIOR SENDOFF 8*-40/ #-"/$ $304,&: #30("/ ▶ FROM PAGE 10 ▶ FROM PAGE 12 ▶ FROM PAGE 12 ▶ FROM PAGE 12 back. You’re needed. amazing things happened to fit into one measly associate sports editor. This year, I wanted to At the theater, no matter how open-minded This year’s seniors are probably a little more column, but shout-outs need to go first and fore- play a larger part with the paper. I expected I try to be, I always end up rolling my eyes at an aware of how much I love them. Alyssa: We’re the most to the 2010 Guardian sloshball champions. that Sundays and Wednesdays would turn into awkward Michael Cera, Kristen Stewart twirling same person (only you, like, get shit done), and We showed heart, determination, unbelievable long days and more responsibility. What I didn’t her greasy strands or the Coen brothers basking I can’t imagine life without you. It’s going to be beer-drinking skills and an unmatched intel- expect was that the relationships I’ve built would in their own cleverness. weird. Reza: I forgive you for dropping me, and lect to put those asshole Koalas in their place. define my senior year. From hazy nights in Vegas After four years of reviewing film — 95 per- for going to DC. Most of all I’m just stoked you’re Few things will ever feel so good as seeing Kris to an epic sloshball win, it truly has been an, uh, cent of which was uninspired — you’d think I’d not going back. Kelsey: How does one become Gregorian go down like a sack of moldy potatoes. somewhat memorable year. have lost all faith in the industry. But amid the as nice as you? It boggles my mind. Emily: You The people who made my Guardian tenure On the more professional side, we have debat- underproduced fodder that gets churned out at surpassed me so long ago — I’m in awe. Vishal: unforgettable — specifically, my time as sports ed extensively over the meaning of athleticism, the box office each week, there’s always a glim- You’re the life of this party. Thanks for transfer- editor — include the following sexy beasts: Emily and you continued to grind away sports lingo to mer of hope. Though few and far between, great ring. Edwin: Am I cool enough to be your friend for being the greatest (and most patient) design increase the accessibility of articles to the general films do get produced, and I — along with all yet? Please? Shida: I adore watching you sleep, editor on the planet; Janani and Matt for mob- public. Out of these arguments, I hope that you other tortured buff — will hold on with every last but I wish we were dancing instead. Sari: Here’s to bing it as my associate editors and for keeping me have come to learn more about sports than you ounce of faith until the next one arrives. our cardboard box in Santa Monica. Let’s never sane; and Erik for helping keep the sports office ever wished you had — I know that I, for one, On that silver lining, I’ll end with shout-outs. be apart again, OK? Wes: Oh wait — you’re not a the chillest of them all by always cracking (bad) have come to appreciate the literal meanings of Simone: Thanks for taking a chance on a senior. Love you anyway. jokes and watching sports 24/7. words far more than I care. nobody whose application was a shoddy “Lion Lastly, I offer my apologies to all those whose Besides being great editors and leaders, We sports snobs often times get caught up in King” theater review. It may have taken a year dreams I may have deferred this year with a Simone, Reza and Alyssa are all still some of stylistic meaning without concern for compre- of rewrites before I wrote anything worth pub- half-raised eyebrow and a stupid red pen. The the coolest people I met at UCSD, which made hension. I hope future Guardian staffers and edi- lishing, but my debut 50-word blurb on “The best leaders foster talent by instilling confidence working for them so much better. And Vishal, I tors can build the same (sometimes adversarial) Holiday” still hangs from my refrigerator. — I never quite got the hang of that. To the A.S. can never thank you enough for letting me pass collegiality that we developed over the year. Dad and Mom: I don’t hate every film in councilmembers, the co-ops and whoever else we the torch to you; the section has never looked My only regret with the Guardian is not the universe; I just have high standards. Yes — might have offended by misspelling your name better. joining sooner. I’ll take solace in knowing that I “Snakes on a Plane” really is one of the worst or misunderstanding your cause: We know you’re So after four years of “Blanc on Base,” I guess made the most of this year. To the drinks we’ve movies of all time. It didn’t really take me 20 min- just students too. But everyone needs a watchdog it’s time for me to round third and head home. shared and the good times we’ve had, this toast is utes to go get popcorn. to keep them on their toes. Truce? P.S. Fuck the Dodgers, GO GIANTS. over. Let’s chug some beer. Oh, and Nicolas Cage: Get a day job.

Congratulations Congratulations Alina We are so proud of you ~ who circumnavigated the world, Hilary! excelled in academics, now graduates UCSD Muir With great joy and pride, we celebrate your graduation in the top of her game! and wish you every success in the years ahead. Love You! Mylime Tave! Love always, From Mom & Dad & Mom, Dad, Andrea, The Mazeika Clan! Grandpa & Grandma Cynthia, Pat, Shelia & Rick

Holly! Congratulations You did it! Joel Now Take on Congratulations the World! and Love! We Love you, Mom, Dad, & Hadley Mom and Dad

Congratulations on your Graduation Tyler We could not be Congratulations Talia more proud on your graduation from UCSD. We are so very proud of you Love, and are excited for and with you today... and everyday! Mom and Dad Love, Abba and Gail CLASSIFIEDS THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 THE UCSD GUARDIAN 15

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KING OF THE BEACH BUMS CHURNS OUT MORE OF THE SAME

Hawaii and , But this attempt at variety Johnson has nailed the chill, only steers Johnson fur- 5 environmentally-friendly, ther off course — the intro beach-bro image to perfec- on the title track sounds tion — but it’s hard to take like a Shins ripoff, while 10 the perpetually stoned surf- “No Good With Faces” is er facade seriously when the a drugged-out Brandon guy’s released four albums Flowers impersonation. Jack Johnson and fathered two children. The album does have To The Sea The lyrics continue in its moments, particularly KNIGHT the same vein. Instead of with “When I Look Up,” a BRUSHFIRE RECORDS providing genuine, mean- minute-long collection of ing we’re lost in a swarm running water noises, xylo- AND DAY of confusing metaphors. phone plunking and a cho- ack Johnson’s fifth stu- “Red Wine, Mistakes, rus of background singers. JUNE 25 dio album, To The Sea, Mythology” sounds like the Too bad the album’s best J is just as uninspired product of one too many song is its shortest. fter the success sex appeal, playing the as its title suggests. While glasses of Merlot, as it finds Johnson’s fifth attempt of his “Mission: distressed, unsuspect- the 13 songs don’t stray Johnson stringing together isn’t all bad. In fact, it’s A Impossible” action ing civilian to Cruise’s far from Johnson’s typical muddled phrases like “little pleasant in all the same thrillers, it seems as if wisecracking secret style — laid-back jams ripe crying robots.” way smoking a bowl is. But Tom Cruise is finally tak- agent. The formula may with acoustic strumming, Johnson attempts to as charming as that might To The Sea ing a turn at self-parody. be overused, but the star lightweight drums and care- supplement his usual sim- be, still feels as His new film, “Knight power of Diaz and Cruise free beach-day vocals — the plistic acoustic guitar sound though we are trapped on and Day,” has him all but ensure a financial tracks blur together until the by sporadically adding a boat in the middle of the indulging in slapstick windfall for this June album’s reduced to a never- flowing keyboard, reverb- ocean — water everywhere shootouts and absurd release — though critical ending bonfire sing-along. heavy electric guitar and a gets a little redundant. one-liners, with the likes acclaim for this light- Working out of his healthy dose of tambourine — Amanda Martinek of, “No one follows us, weight film is anything solar-powered studios in throughout the album. Staff Writer or I kill myself and then but a guarantee. her.” Cameron Diaz — Imran Manji comes through with the Staff Writer previous album, Can’t Be Tamed trades in lyr- MILEY CYRUS ics about butterfly-inducing first dates for lyrics about abusive relationships. The change is expected for the teen, who has CAN’T BE TAMED gradually followed the familiar “I’m a grownup THE TWILIGHT SAGA: ECLIPSE now!” path that Britney and Christina slithered JUNE 30 JUNE 18 down years before. While the darker, sexual lyr- ics about how all the guys want her are sure to set s a respite from the summer heat and slews of action films, director David Slade’s “The Twilight hough her debut album was only a few years fans of Cyrus’ good-girl image on edge, perhaps Saga: Eclipse” will take you back to the somber forest of Forks, Washington for the third install- ago, Miley Cyrus is preparing for a precari- it’s for the better — Considering her almost A ment of the box office smash series. Picking up after 2009’s cliffhanger — where Edward pro- T ous leap across the teen-adult divide. With robotic penchant for foot-in-mouth syndrome posed to Bella and the vampires and werewolves forged an unholy alliance — “Eclipse” is the stuff the June 18 release of Can’t Be Tamed, Cyrus (she managed to shit about Thom Yorke, Jay-Z that shrieking fangirls and million-dollar movies are made of. ditches her all-American digs for a she-woman and her own single), Cyrus hasn’t always had her With the same cast of perfectly-sculpted, vapid characters, fans shouldn’t expect a huge improve- roar. The titular track features the diva’s signature Disney persona on lock. ment. All the bland “Twilight” staples are sure to cameo: Kristen Stewart will moodily tousle her hair, Tennessee croon, set to a heavy techno-dance If a Poison cover and a scantily clad music Taylor Lautner’s whine is sure to recall his prepubescent “Cheaper by the Dozen 2” performance and synth borrowed from last year’s “Party in the video isn’t enough to convince you that the for- Robert Pattinson will groan this way through all 90 minutes with a hazy, angst-fueled deadpan. But U.S.A.” The new track, however, noticeably mer Hannah Montana star is ready for the grind, why bother with warnings? Crippling shame or no, you’re still going to be dropping $10.50 at the abandons the latter’s bubblegum sound for more then her new badass black duds will — 1992 midnight premiere decked out in fangs and a Team Edward tank that’s as sparkly as he is. mature club tracks — a sonic shift that one can birth date be damned. — Amanda Martinek assume continues throughout the album. Phasing — Neda Salamat Staff Writer out the sickly-sweet singles that dominated her senior staff writer

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f your Spring Quarter grades have got you I down this summer, “Meet the Parents” director Jay Roach has got just the schadenfreuden remedy for wit with a thing for dressing up dead your intellectual insecurities: Dinner mice. Much to the dismay of his empa- for Schmucks, a movie about laugh- thetic girlfriend, Tim invites Barry ing at dumb people. Tim (played by to the dinner. Though it seems for a “Knocked Up” alumnus Paul Rudd) is moment that the duo’s unlikely friend- an ambitious suit looking to climb the ship might hinder Tim from bringing GET HIM TO corporate ladder. Just when he thinks Barry to the freak show, the two go he’s at the verge of a promotion, he’s anyway. It’s a simple story, and, if little THE GREEK given one more obstacle: He must find else, it’s sure to be packed with Carell’s STARRING RUSSELL BRAND, JONAH HILL & SEAN an idiot and bring him to his boss’ signature shtick — scene after scene “P. DIDDY” COMBS Dinner for Extraordinary People — an of cringe-worthy discomfort. Once DIRECTED BY NICHOLAS STOLLER event where asshole businessmen show “Schmucks” hits theatres July 13, one RATED R off their pedigree idiots for a grand thing’s sure: No other slacker summer 1:09 prize promotion. activity will make you feel smarter. As it just so happens, Tim meets — Alyssa Bereznak Barry (Steve Carell), a wide-eyed dim- senior staff writer SEX, DRUGS AND RUSSELL BRAND EMINEM et him to the Greek” is the spin- comeback at the Greek Theater in Los one-liner gems like “I’m mind-fucking off of “Forgetting Sarah Marshall” Angeles. “Greek” follows the resulting the shit out of you right now” capping G we’ve been clamouring for since mayhem as a frantic Green tries to get off the film’s brilliant comedic tim- RECOVERY Aldous Snow (Russell Brand) first got Snow from London to L.A. in time for ing. By contrast, Hill — a comparative into that bitchy blonde’spants in 2008. the big show. expert in the role of the funnyman JUNE 22 Now in his very own feature-length fol- There’s no doubt that the cast is — disappoints as Diddy’s lapdog. low-up, “Greek,” Snow has fallen off the bizarre — but the mix works surpris- The “Superbad” veteran is sidelined n the heels of last year’s Relapse is this year’s Recovery: Eminem’s new sobriety wagon entirely — prompting ingly well for the film. in “Greek” as a naïve newcomer who concept album and sonic 180. He’s continuing on the path to maturity the rock legend to partake in a string of The film mocks Brand’s very public attempts to capture audience sympa- O and sobriety, and, given that he spent a good part of 2005 through motel-trashing ragers, absinthe binges past of sex and drug addiction, utiliz- thies, but fails to please with his overea- 2008 binging on pills and booze, this release proves he’s already undergone and celebrity debauchery. ing his character’s outrageous persona ger demeanor. a vast improvement. If first single “Not Afraid” is any indication, the album’s The grandeur doesn’t last long. to satirize a society fixated on fame and Nonetheless, “Greek” possesses a sure to feature triumphant, orchestral arrangements, backed by pulsating Following the release of a racist ditty, mocks his. He delivers side-splitters coveted ability to transport the audi- beats, heavy bass and Shady’s vicious wit. Unlike previous albums, Recovery Snow is quickly crushed under the pile with ease, and his performance is a ence into the helter-skelter mayhem of is the rapper’s first album without a single appearance from Dre. Instead, of tabloid outrage that descends upon delusional and drug-addled one, stum- celebrity life, all while inducing laugh- Eminem’s latest will feature pop princesses like Pink and Rihanna — cer- him. His career seems to have finally bling through the streets of Las Vegas ter. The well-crafted comedic backbone tainly a departure from what we know of the often misogynistic Mathers reached its breaking point. Fortunately in search of a fix — it’s a sequence so of this summer flick is sure to make (after all, it was only 10 years ago when he was taking shots at Christina for Snow, optimistic intern organic it seems that he’s done it before. “Greek” the 2010 equivalent of “The Aguilera on “The Real Slim Shady”). Since then Eminem’s been on quite the Aaron Green (Jonah Hill) — the drool- Not to be outdone, Diddy surprises Hangover”— brimming with swearing, rollercoaster, alternating between musical genius and personal crash-and ing fan boy in “Sarah Marshall” — sug- us in his first comedic role as an intim- confusion and a fuckload of alcohol. burns — perhaps now he has finally beaten his demons. gests to his hard-ass boss Sergio (Sean idating boss. He wrenches laughter — Amanda Martinek — Bryan Kim “P. Diddy” Combs) that Snow stage his from an unsuspecting audience with Staff Writer Staff Writer

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consider myself to be an adaptable, “go-with- I the-flow” kind of person. I’ve experienced enough change in my life to know that it’s a fact of life that ought to be embraced, not resisted. Now, perched on the precipice of graduation, if only I could just conjure that wisdom, because right now, I feel a little empty. I can’t fight a creeping vulnerability as I face up to the unnerving realization I have been trying to ignore for quite sometime now: college is over. Truth is, if someone asked me at the school year’s start if I was ready to graduate, my answer would have been “hell yes.” I had never forged the “home away from home, best years of my life” collegiate experience that so many rave about. My first two years at UC Riverside, I felt oppressed by the lack of commonalities between (at least what I thought was) a shallow-minded, intellectually uninspired student body and myself. I had a handful of good friends and few college- defining experiences I appreciated. I felt a sense EERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN of loss that I had missed out on “the good times.”. When I transferred to UCSD, the cynicism ERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN ERIK that my time at Rivershit had cultivated per- severed, and fit in seamlessly with the hordes ally, because if I did, you all would have page- duce to me. The memories of our times together of zombie students. But my senior year was an long essays. But if I have worked with you in the will be ingrained on my heart as long as it beats, awakening of sorts, and it’s no coincidence my office on a regular basis, then know this: The as they’ve transformed my experience in college JEPSEN collegiate life finally became fulfilling when I time we have spent together this year has made from one of indifference to one I don’t want to joined the Guardian staff. You guys have enriched this past year the best of my life to date (sorry, see end. Thank you for touching my life, and I’m PHOTO EDITOR my life. can’t help it). You bunch of quirky, funny, unique, humbled to have had this opportunity. To the Guardian staff, word count constraints endearing group of intelligent people are the kind I had way more in this, but it wouldn’t be hotography has always been a conun- prevent me from writing to each of you individu- I always thought college was supposed to intro- didn’t authentic if I have to edit my work down. P drum for me: I believe it is more important to live the moment than to necessarily capture the moment; I would far rather be in front of a lens than behind one; PHILIP I do not like the constant pressure of getting the perfect shot, but the perfect shot is what I always want; and although I live with the camera, you will not likely see me with my RHIE camera, unless I am on an assignment. Yet despite everything, I love capturing the ART EDITOR emotion and human spirit of every event or place I have been. dmittedly, my stint at I want to thank the Guardian for the A the Guardian was sort of honor and privilege of serving the students impersonal, as I spent less and faculty at UCSD for the past four years. time forming relationships and The work has been personally rewarding, more time making my comics and and I can deny the occasional pleasure in the illustrations look as badass as pos- recognition of fellow students for the work sible. That’s not to say that I don’t I so love. have my fair share of apprecia- PHILIP RHIE/GUARDIAN A big “thank you” is extended to every tion for the Guardian. It gave me editor who has ever worked in the sports a sense of purpose and direction Sunny-Side Up would never have Guardian has allowed me (next to my tardiness. Having never been section (Danai, Rael, Janani, Jake, Matt, when I lacked it most, and despite been birthed. Consequently, I’d like Sunny-Side Up). But mostly, he’s the most punctual artist, I appreci- Vishal and Liam). You’ve all made our time my emotional detachment from to thank Simone and anyone else someone I could talk to when I was ate that they dealt with me ’til the together at the Guardian hilariously enter- the paper, I’m forever grateful involved in my hiring as Art Editor emo-ing out. Thanks, man. very end. The same to the manag- taining and enjoyable. Emily, thank you for the Guardian’s effect on my for giving me the liberty to extend I’d like to thank Emily for her ing editors. I’d also like to thank the for working with my pictures when I could life and the relationships that I’ve my mopey story throughout the rest peppy personality, juxtaposed art team for taking me seriously. I not capture your intent; your designs were formed there. the year. Without that option, against a usually irritated demeanor. never thought myself the most com- always awesome! To John: You are the man, I’d like to thank Chris I don’t think I would have I always found this to be a splen- petent individual, and their etiquette good luck next year. I am certain you’ll make Kokiousis for giving mee ever written my own did surprise. I’d like to thank Erik toward my rank was humbling. the paper look good. my start. Without his cocomicm novel. for his sense of humor — which, Finally, I’d like to thank the To everyone else, it’s been a pleasure encouragement, his I’d like to thank against Emily’s personality, was the Guardian for setting me up with working with you; I love you all. So this is love of video games RRezae for his vision best comic relief in the office. I’d Kim Cyprian, the new art editor Erik closing the lens cover one last time for and his creation of anand preference for also like to thank Vishal Natarajan, and fellow artist extraordinaire, the Guardian. Have an awesome, grand, fan- my column, I would my particular artis- whose heart-to-hearts in and out of whose existence has created an tastic, great, stellar … grand day! never have seen the tticic style. Hadst he not the office always kept me grounded altogether new fear of life and death Oh yeah, and “Lionhearts” are the best Guardian as a legit cre- continually approached in the here and now. Incidentally, that I never once fathomed in my thing to happen to photography since … ative venue. Thanks, Christina me with new ideas, I would I’d also like to thank his drunken overabundant imagination. Never ever. And in regard to photography, I am Aushana, for hiring me as an illus- never have swung by the office as alter-ego for embodying all the ’70s has life seemed so vast and adven- certain the Guardian sets the standard for trator and giving me a chance to much as I did. I’d also like to thank Jack Nicholson sleaze that I didn’t turous until now. Thanks. other California college newspapers. unload my emotional woes on our him for our collaborative efforts, know actually existed. Never having been very good We have set a high bar of accomplish- undergraduate population. Had she which I find to have been one of I’d like to thank News, Opinion, at goodbyes, I’ll just say: Thanks, ment that I am sure future staff will carry not suggested that I draw a comic, the most fulfilling opportunities the Focus and Hiatus for dealing with Guardian. I’ll see you around. forward. EMILY KU DESIGN EDITOR

n true Guardian fashion, I’m writ- of the way. Dave humored me when I had best critic, and Reza my best friend. Simone, I ing this following a 5 a.m. produc- my epiphany last winter (or psychotic break, you can weather any storm. Design never tion — after which I headed home however you want to look at it), until he fails because of you; I don’t know how you not to sleep, but to prepare for a discussion realized I was dead serious — and so “The do it all. Reza, I can’t think of the word “col- I had to teach at 8 a.m. I’ve got InDesign Memory Remains” went to print. lab” without thinking of you, and no one open because I still have to design Sports, Edwin kept right in step with me this can seem to call me Em Dash quite the same Photoshop open because I’m trying to plan entire year, always dependable, always way. I’ll be looking for that telltale resilient the image that’s supposed to go with it, positive, and never saying a word when he bird when you become famous. and the last five text messages I’ve received was stuck in the office at 3 a.m. because I’d Angela and Hayley, all I know is that (and the last seven I’ve sent) have been thrown out three different designs. Once you guys are going to do the Guardian Guardian-related. the dust from Focus reconstruction settled, proud. Melody, I have the utmost faith in How do you just walk away from some- Sports was next. Janani, the only person I you. Remember that you are only at your thing so all-encompassing? How do you would ever share an office and “Lost” with, beginning, looking back on my ending. Just reconcile what has been your entire life with and Jake, Vishal, Matt and Liam: It’s your a heads-up: you’re going to be everyone’s the mystery that is to come? enthusiasm and pride that inspires my love favorite person. I couldn’t have asked for a The other day, Neda and Liam were for designing your section. No section is more promising successor. arguing over whose section I was more loyal more fun to work with. Can we say the rest And Erik: No words can really say. As to, Focus or Sports. (I wasn’t sure if it was is Guardian history? Dave said, the war is almost over. But I the right time to point out that the debate I sometimes think about how terrible wouldn’t have traded the ride for anything. was moot, because neither of them will be my timing is, becoming so attached to print A designer’s work is always seen but getting me next year.) Richard only gave media when it’s on its way out. But I’m only never known. It’s always a journey, but it’s Focus to me because no one else wanted it, lucky to have found this part of my stressball always worth it. To everyone, thank you. I but Alyssa had my back from the beginning, self when I did, uncovered by a hodgepodge don’t know how else to say it. I would end taking unfortunate creative liberties with of scrappy journalists you can’t find any- with an em dash — but I wouldn’t be able to Michael Capparelli’s artwork. I wouldn’t where else. qualify it with anything more amazing than have wanted anyone else with me every step With design, it was Simone who was my the people who make that me. ERIK JEPSEN/GUARDIAN SPORTS THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 THE UCSD GUARDIAN 19

FROM PAGE 16 WORK FOR BEST of TRITON ATHLETICS, CONTD.

BEST BREAKTHROUGH BEST COACH OR THE ATHLETE MANAGER GUARDIAN T&F NICK HOWE BSB DAN O’BRIEN GET PAID, GET EXPERIENCE THE STUDENT VOICE SINCE 1967 POSITIONS AVAILABLE FOR WRITERS LAYOUT DESIGNERS AS A SPORT THAT IS NOT O’BRIEN HAS HEADED THE ILLUSTRATORS sanctioned in high school athletics, the javelin Triton baseball program for 13 years, trans- is usually dominated by upperclassmen. Howe forming the team from a middle-of-the- COPY READERS shattered this mold a year ago when he burst on road Division-III squad to a Division-II the scene as a freshman to win the CCAA title powerhouse that expects to be among the WEB DESIGNERS and earn CCAA Freshman of the Year honors. nation’s best. It culminated in this year’s But it was during his sophomore season that remarkable season, where the Tritons came Howe developed into a top athlete, progressing within two runs of a national champion- ASSOCIATE EDITORS at a rate that exceeded everyone’s expectations ship. O’Brien coaxed 54 wins out of his team — in less than one year, he furthered his best while accumulating only eight losses — both PHOTOGRAPHERS throw by close to 25 feet. On May 29, Howe records for the program. His team’s perfor- took home a national title, throwing 225 feet at mance earned him a second consecutive LAYOUT DESIGNERS the championship meet in Charlotte, N.C., to CCAA Coach of the Year Award, which only become UCSD’s first male track and field cham- cemented his place as the top baseball coach GRAPHIC DESIGNERS pion at the Division-II level. in school history. VIDEO PRODUCTION HONORABLE MENTION HONORABLE MENTION Erik Elliott (Men’s Tennis) Denny Harper (Men’s Water Polo) Kyle Saul (Baseball) Charity Elliott (Women’s Basketball) Tiffany Hunter (Women’s Basketball) INFORMATIONAL MEETING FRIDAY, APR. 9 @ 5 P.M. ON Kristen Armstrong (Women’s Soccer) THE SECOND FLOOR OF THE OLD STUDENT CENTER Jessica Wi (Women’s Soccer) FREE PIZZA WILL BE PROVIDED APPLICATIONS AVAILABLE ONLINE AT WWW.UCSDGUARDIAN.ORG QUESTIONS? E-MAIL [email protected] COMPILED BY LIAM ROSE, VISHAL NATARAJAN, AND MATT CROSKEY SPECIAL OFFER Sculpt Fusion Yoga powerful body – peaceful mind

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Carmel Valley Rd. 4639 Carmel Mountain Rd. #102 San Diego, CA 9213 5 12 Minutes .+.$*,'$&/.&šmmm$iYkbfj\ki_edoe]W$Yec from UCSD! ;87:<; With another year in the books, THURSDAY, JUNE 3, 2010 20 the Guardian recognizes the BEST MALE ATHLETE BEST FEMALE ATHLETE BSB BRANDON GREGORICH BEST WBB CHELSEA CARLISLE

WHATEVER THE SECRET TO WITH HER ABILITY TO SCORE hitting may be, Gregorich certainly found it this year. OF TRITON from anywhere when her team most needed it, With new school records in hits, doubles and RBIs in Carlisle set herself apart as the Tritons’ leader on the a season, the senior first baseman undoubtedly had floor. The sophomore guard guided the Tritons to a one of the best seasons in UCSD baseball history all 25-5 season and a second consecutive CCAA title, while hitting a ridiculously high .455 average. His picking up the CCAA Most Valuable Player Award awards are too numerous to list in full: CCAA Player along the way. Carlisle averaged a team-high 17.4 of the Year, Daktronics West Region Player of the Year points per game, and also led the Tritons in assists and ABCA/Rawlings All-American are only some of and steals. Her efforts led to her being named as a first the highlights of his trophy case. Gregorich’s success team All-American — the only underclassman named at the plate helped drive the Tritons all the way to the to the squad — as well as the Daktronics West Region Division-II championship game, where they narrowly Player of the Year. Carlisle surely has many more stel- lost to Southern Indiana University. Nonetheless, lar games left in her career, but her consistent perfor- Gregorich’s performance this season will go down in mance this season was second-to-none. the Tritons’ history books as one of the best UCSD ATHL HONORABLE MENTION has ever seen. Christine Merrill (Track and Field) HONORABLE MENTION Lisa Bradley (Women’s Soccer) Vance Albitz (Baseball) Alex Henley (Swimming) Dan Perdew (Swimming) Sylvia Schmidt (Women’s Volleyball) Steven Donohoe (Men’s Water Polo) Jordan Lawley (Men’s Basketball) ETICS BEST CHAMPIONSHIP BEST GRADUATING PERFORMANCE SENIOR - 2009 2010 BSB MATT ROSSMAN SWIM DAN PERDEW AGAINST CENTRAL MISSOURI UNIVERSITY AT THE COLLEGE WORLD SERIES OUTSTANDING TEAM

BASEBALL

FOR ALL PERDEW’S ACHIEVEMENTS DURING THE SECOND GAME OF in the pool, his collection of national championships the Division-II College World Series in Cary, N.C., do the most to say he’s one of the best athletes to ever Rossman got the starting nod and did not disappoint. represent UCSD. He won his first titles as a sopho- Rossman kept a no-hitter through the eighth inning, more in the 50 fly and 100 free, setting school records but allowed two straight doubles that let Mules tie in both events. He became champion in the 100 free the game 1-1. The game moved on to extra innings, for three straight years, and his winning 100-yard but the Triton bullpen stayed empty, and Rossman freestyle time of 43.30 seconds in 2009 still stands as settled down to continue his pitching dominance. an NCAA Division-II record. It doesn’t end there — Rossman did not allow a single hit for the rest of the he has been featured in Sports Illustrated magazine’s game, which finally ended thanks to an RBI single “Faces in the Crowd” segment, met the qualifying from Kellen Lee. The senior righty finished the day standards for U.S. Olympic Trials and finished his UCSD BASEBALL MAY HAVE COME JUST SHORT OF A with an 11-inning complete game, allowing only two career holding school records in four separate events. hits and striking out 12 batters. A complete game is With five national titles in his career, Perdew gradu- national title, but its season was far from a disappointment. In fact, it was the most hard enough, but for a pitcher to pitch 11 dominant ates from UCSD as one of the top sprinters in all of successful run to date, and it’s hard to argue that this team was anything but one of innings is unheard of. In his last start as a Triton, Division-II swimming. the nation’s best: 54 wins, only eight losses and just two runs short of a national title. Rossman’s outing against Central Missouri set the The Tritons never dropped below fourth in the national rankings and were the top- standard for playoff performances. HONORABLE MENTION ranked team for the final month of the season. UCSD also raked in the individual accolades, with a phenomenal six players named to the All-American team. Senior Vance Albitz (Baseball) HONORABLE MENTION Vance Albitz won third Gold Glove and repeated as National Defensive Player of Steven Donohoe (Men’s Water Polo) Nick Howe at D-II Nationals (Track and Field) the Year, and senior Brandon Gregorich took CCAA Player of the Year honors. The Linda Rainwater (Track and Field) Annette Ilg against Humboldt State in the NCAA list goes on, but the message is clear: Baseball was UCSD’s best team this year. Christine Merrill (Track and Field) Tournament (Women’s Basketball) HONORABLE MENTION Men’s Water Polo, Women’s Water Polo

BEST GAME BEST MOMENT

WSOC UCSD 2, CHICO STATE 1 T&F LINDA RAINWATER

AT NCAA D-II TOURNAMENT AT CCAA CHAMPIONSHIPS IN THE SECOND ROUND OF THE NCAA DIVISION-II TOURNAMENT DESPITE BEING RANKED AS THE TOP on Nov. 14, UCSD hosted Chico State in a battle of conference foes. The Tritons were women’s high-jumper in Division-II, Rainwater strug- making their seventh appearance in the second round, while it was the Wildcats first gled to win her conference championship. She was — yet Chico had beaten UCSD 2-0 when the two first met on 2009 on Sep. 20. The only able to clear 5’5.25” — almost five inches below Wildcats came out strong and struck first in the 23rd minute, but the Tritons didn’t wait her personal best — and had to go to a jump-off to long to equalize. Less than 60 seconds later, sophomore striker Sarah McTigue hit a blis- break a tie with her nearest competitor. Rainwater had tering shot from the top of the box into the top-left corner of the goal, and the game was been unable to shake a nagging back injury for several tied at 1-1. The deadlock was finally broken in the 86th minute, when McTigue gathered weeks, and by the end of the competition was in so a loose ball on the edge of the box and fired in a hard shot. The ball slipped past the much pain that she needed to be helped off the mat goalkeeper, and the Tritons survived a frantic last few minutes for the 2-1 win. The dra- after each jump. It wasn’t discovered until later that Rainwater was actually competing matic goal provided for UCSD’s most entertaining game this year and sent the Tritons with a fractured back. “If we knew at the time we would have pulled her,” head coach Tony into the third round of the tournament. Salerno said. “She said she had some pain but that she could still jump.” Rainwater man- aged to clear 5’7.25”, allowing her to take her second straight conference title. Rainwater’s HONORABLE MENTION tough performance demonstrates a tenacity that few athletes can claim to have. UCSD 2, Central Missouri University 1 (Baseball) UCSD 71, Cal Poly Pomona 69 (Women’s Basketball) HONORABLE MENTION UCSD 91, San Francisco State 86 (Men’s Basketball) Aaron Bauman’s walk-off single against Georgia College (Baseball) UCSD 4, Loyola Marymount 5 (Men’s Water Polo) Men’s volleyball beats Pepperdine for the first time on senior night