Issue One Use This 2

Volume 81, Issue 1 Quarter 1, 2010 Capouillez Crowned Homecoming Queen by Kristen Manchor Homecoming has been a celebrated tradition in the United States since the 1800’s. It is an annual custom for universities, colleges, and high schools to welcome back former alumni and residents to their specific school. It’s also a way of pulling together the school and rallying up current students to support their football team. This year Halifax High School began its annual homecoming festivities with a spirit week. Throughout the week, nerds, superheroes, Indians, and aliens could be seen roaming the halls. There was a unanimous feeling among teachers that this year’s students were the most spirited group of students in ten years. The spirit week activities concluded with a pep rally on Friday. The senior football players got special good luck kisses from their moms while the homecomingHi- court tried to toss marshmallows into a cup on their partners’ heads. The pep rally concluded with the annual year cheer and a good luck to the football team. The homecoming jamboree continued at the football game. School organizations spotted the softball field as spectators entered the Halifax Wildcat stadium. Observers got to see the show of Tracey Cox adorned in a wetsuit in a Inside this Issue dunking booth.Lite The homecoming court could also be seen gathering CoD: Black on the softball field with continuous smiles on their faces. Ops 2 After getting numerous pictures, the homecoming court Muffin Tops 3 assembled in a parade of elaborate cars to ride up to the The McRib 3 football field. Awaiting fans in the crowd cheered as the Boys of Fall 4 homecoming court rounded the football field and stopped Girls’ Soccer 5 in front of the stands. Volleyball 6 As the court was announced, one by one, they were Coach escorted onto the field. Finally the three seniors were Kerstetter 8 Hi-Lite Hi-Lite Hi-Lite Hi-Lite Hi-Lite announced and waited anxiously in the center of the field Special Halifax Area School District to hear who was queen. All anxiety left when Jenn Olympics 10 Capouillez was announced as the 2010 Homecoming Modulars 11 Queen. Daniel When asked how she felt about the night she replied, Neves 14 “I was excited because everyone was cheering for me. To Hunt or Then I was surprised when my name was announced as Not to Hunt 16 Queen.” The night’s festivities ended with a dance hosted Jon and by the Student Council. Kate Plus 8 18 Gratz Fair 18 HHS, 3940 Peters Mountain Road, Halifax, PA 17032 1 Editorials Black Ops Pandemonium by Ben Feidt As November 9th approaches, the release date for the highly anticipated godlike game Call of Duty: Black Ops, the world is in utter turmoil. The world’s top scientists are in the midst of creating a time machine to hasten the horrifyingly long six-day wait. All nations have terminated other actions to join together to try to make this possible. No other event has brought so many countries together; Israel and Palestine, Tibet and China, all have joined hands in this united, epic cause. Other giants are tuned in to this milestone in humankind as well. Concerts are being held just to celebrate Black Ops and the bands and stars performing aren’t “no-name” acts either; when Metallica and Justin Bieber are both supporting the same thing, you know something’s up. “I don’t really know what the thing is, but I’m making tons of money!” says teen sensation Justin Bieber about supporting Black Ops. Although all of Justin Bieber’s fans aren’t old enough to legally buy the game, it doesn’t seem to dampen their enthusiasm. In fact, some people are coming to Bieber’s concert just because of the game such as one nonfan who asked to remain anonymous, “I don’t even like Justin Bieber; I just heard he’d be throwing out copies of Black Ops into the crowd. So, that’s why I’m here.” On the other end of the spectrum, metal heads are enjoying the week-long “CODstock” being performed by Metallica, Slayer, and Megadeth to name a few. The head banging musical festival will be held until the 9th to give music fans something to do if the whole time machine idea doesn’t work out. But it’s the individuals who are most excited for this game, although it is much more than just a pastime activity. “This is seriously going to be the greatest day of my life! Getting married? Having children? No way, man, Black Ops is way better,” says thirty year old Hi-lite Staff gamer, Thurmond Waters. Individuals such as Thurmond are not few and far between, either. Across the United States alone, 30% of the male population, Editors: around 50 million people, have camped outside their local GameStops in Joshua Conway eagerness for the release. Benjamin Feidt Some have even quit their jobs or skipped school to do so such as Josh Victoria Hogan Ferrari, “Yeah, like, who needs a job if you have the most orgasmic thing Writers: ever? Give me an Xbox and Black Ops, and I don’t care what else happens, Members of Mr. Ruff’s Honors ‘cause I’m gonna be the happiest guy in the world.” English and Ms. Kelly’s AP English Whether or not schools and workplaces should just close their doors the Classes week of Nov. 9 is still being debated; however, it’s unlikely anybody will be going out of their house that week anyway, except for the elderly perhaps for Photographers: bingo night. Bethany Fetterhoff While the world may seem to go into limbo on Nov. 9th, rest assured, we’ll Seth Harman all be working our way to the 15th prestige level. Dan Hebanthal Daniel Kolua As for this lone editor, I’ll see you online. Semper Fi! David Reed Kaylin Shoffstall Zacharia Seiders Michelle Swab Allison Trutt Layout: Andrew Sheeler, Co-Editor Jeremy Wheeler, Co-Editor *Special Thanks to the parents who submitted photographs for this issue 2 Just Because It Zips, Doesn’t Mean It Fits By Lexi White Face it, muffins are delicious. They’re like small cups of love served to us by grandmothers and bakeries all over the world. We all love muffins, but the part that you always find missing are the tops. Nobody can resist a warm sugared muffin top. They’re unexplainable; Just pure bliss. The mere mention of a muffin top leaves the best of us dazed and drooling. Now picture your beloved muffin top bursting out of a pair of size 4 jeans. That warm fuzzy feeling instantaneously leaves your gut and is replaced by disgust and awe. “How could someone of that mass possibly shove themselves in those jeans?” And “how will those poor helpless jeans make it through the day?” These are the questions I contemplate daily. Because of the recent rise in the need to be thin in society, some girls are starving themselves to fit in to the perfect pair of jeans. Others are still chowin’ down on cheese fries, Big Macs, and milkshakes on a frequent basis and still trying to fit into their jeans from yesteryear. Face it girls, just because it zips with twelve of your friends holding up your Big Mac belly, doesn’t mean you should wear your jeans. What goes up must come down and once your friends let go, you have a muffin top that stretches down to your knees. I can’t even fathom how that is comfortable! Why do we wear jeans that don’t fit? Everybody’s done it to feel smaller, but really wearing clothes that are too small for you just makes you look like a giant. Appealing clothes aren’t clothes that show your imperfect tummy and extensively long chest crack, they’re clothes that fit. If only we could get the half of America’s population that is donning that muffin top disguise around their waists to stop and leave the muffin tops to be savored and drooled at atop the warm muffins we love to eat. Good luck America, I’m waiting. The Legend Returns By: Courtney Trotman For those people who happen to be hermits, don’t watch T.V., or don’t have postal service, I wish to inform you that the wonder that is the McRib is back on the market. That’s right, the legend is back. As McDonald’s puts it, it’s “So hearty, so fulfilling, it sticks to your ribs”. McDonald’s attributes this “rib sticking goodness” to the new and improved 97% plastic pork patty. Also contributing to the fulfilling bun experience is the reduction of pork in the patty. This delightful sandwich is sure to be a low calorie treat, having only 3% sauteed onion meat including pork gristle and the occasional chunk of bone (recognized as meat by the company). The McRib is also back with its oh so alluring rib shape. lonely pickle The corporation once again broke out the company play dough molds that hold the secret to that magical McRib shape. barbecue Nothing (not even the sacred Mcnugget molds) can compare to the iconic McRib structure. Who wouldn’t want to partake “pork” in a faux-boned pork nugget on steroids? If you’re still not sold on this little plastic-y chunk of bun heaven, I invite you to glob that tangy gum based McRib sauce on to that delicious lardy bun and maybe throw on a chemically enhanced pickle or two.

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