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Moving from Trauma to Healing: Black Queer Cultural Workers’ Experiences and Discourses of Love

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Moving from Trauma to Healing: Black Queer Cultural Workers’ Experiences and Discourses of Love University of Massachusetts Amherst ScholarWorks@UMass Amherst Doctoral Dissertations Dissertations and Theses July 2017 Moving from Trauma to Healing: Black Queer Cultural Workers’ Experiences and Discourses of Love Durryle N. Brooks University of Massachusetts Amherst Follow this and additional works at: https://scholarworks.umass.edu/dissertations_2 Part of the Adult and Continuing Education and Teaching Commons, and the Curriculum and Social Inquiry Commons Recommended Citation Brooks, Durryle N., "Moving from Trauma to Healing: Black Queer Cultural Workers’ Experiences and Discourses of Love" (2017). Doctoral Dissertations. 944. https://doi.org/10.7275/10018538.0 https://scholarworks.umass.edu/dissertations_2/944 This Open Access Dissertation is brought to you for free and open access by the Dissertations and Theses at ScholarWorks@UMass Amherst. It has been accepted for inclusion in Doctoral Dissertations by an authorized administrator of ScholarWorks@UMass Amherst. For more information, please contact [email protected]. Moving from Trauma to Healing: Black Queer Cultural Workers’ Experiences and Discourses of Love A Dissertation Presented by DURRYLE NORRIS BROOKS, JR. Submitted to the Graduate School of the University of Massachusetts Amherst in partial fulfillment of the requirements for the degree of DOCTOR OF PHILOSPHY MAY 2017 College of Education Teacher Education and School Improvement © Durryle Norris Brooks, Jr. 2017 All Rights Reserved Moving from Trauma to Healing: Black Queer Cultural Workers’ Experiences and Discourses of Love A Dissertation Presented By DURRYLE NORRIS BROOKS, JR. Approved as to style and content by: ___________________________________ Keisha L. Green, Co-Chair ___________________________________ Kysa Nygreen, Co-Chair ___________________________________ Claudio Moreira, Member ________________________________ Joseph B. Berger, Senior Associate Dean College of Education DEDICATION To all of the Black Queer folks who have ever been told or made to feel that you are not enough. You are. Get your life! ACKNOWLEDGMENTS I would like to thank my advisors Keisha L Green, Kysa Nygreen, and Claudio Moreira for their support. I want to especially thank Claudio Moreira for helping me rediscover and remember my voice and for enacting an embodied and performative love within the classroom and beyond. To my tribe, I love you all so very much. I would not have made it through this process without you. Thank you: Dr. Katharina Von Kellenbach, Dr. Brian Jobe, Dr. Rita Melendez, Dr. Dawn-Ellisa Fischer, Dr. Sonja MacKenzie, Patrick McFall, Shimina Harris, Anthony Freeman, Michael Diaz, Sydney Seifert, Stephanie Hubbard, Jonathan Perry, Rob Newells, Carlo Delgadillo, Erik Martinez, Dr. Sonja MacKenzie, Jennifer Augustine, Daniel Morales, Sonji Johnson, Dr. Caroline Garner, Dr. Kerrita Mayfield, Dr. Safire Dejong, Valerie Jiggets, and Dr. Nini Hayes, Sovann-Malis Loeung, Millicient Jackson, Dr. becky martinez, Dr. Kathy Obear, Dr. Molly Keehn, Elaine Brigham, Rob Simmons, Armanthia Duncan, M. Francis Vidal, Saami Bloom, Carolina Ossa, and Dr. Barbara Love. Literally, it took a village. Without your unending support and unconditional love, I would not be where I am today. Thank you! A special thank you to Dr. Ray Sharick for checking in on my life and supporting me through this challenging year. To Dena Harris, Elizabeth Chase, and Chikita Brooks, thank you for all of your love over these years. Uncle Jeff, thank you for opening doors for me. Shermaine Mitchel-Ryan, thank you for becoming my sister and Paul Ryan, for loving her. To Donte Hilliard, my brother, thank you for loving me enough to trust me with your knowledge and brilliance. And to my dads, Jamie Washington and Samuel Offer, thank v you for your vision, your calling, your healing touch, and your unconditional love over these years. You saved me in the moments of my darkest lament, and I’m forever grateful. Jaleel, this is for you! And to my Boothang, I have never known a love oh so great. Thank you! Ashe. vi ABSTRACT MOVING FROM TRAUMA TO HEALING: BLACK QUEER CULTURAL WORKERS’ EXPERIENCES AND DISCOURSES OF LOVE MAY 2017 DURRYLE N. BROOKS, B.A., ST. MARY’S COLLEGE OF MARYLAND M.A., SAN FRANCISCO STATE UNIVERSITY Ph.D., UNIVERSITY OF MASSACHUSETTS AMHERST Directed by: Professors Keisha L. Green and Kysa Nygreen Within the US context, there is a considerable misunderstanding of what love is. Normative discourse on love within our society is almost exclusively relegated to romance, familial relations, and or sexual connections. However, many scholars (Fromm, 1956, 1976; hooks, 2000, 2001; Tillich, 1952, 1954) have explored love within a critical theoretical construction, which has linked contemporary discourse on love to power, privilege, and oppression. In that sense, normative discourses on love are not innocuous but instead are hegemonic and serve as an ideology to perpetuate individualism and oppression. This qualitative study explores the impact of normative discourses of love at the intersection of race and sexuality within contemporary US context. Drawing on the experiences of 14 Black Queer Cultural Workers (BQCWs), I gathered their narratives through a 60 to 90-minute, semi-structured interview protocol. The protocol was designed to elicit their conceptualizations of normative discourses of love, their own personal conceptualizations of love, and the impact of love on their everyday lived experiences. vii The findings of the research reveal that the impact of normative discourses of love on BQCWs was devastating and traumatic. Normative discourses of love perpetuated the belief that love was for white heterosexual cisgender people and not Black queer people. This resulted in individual level and community level impacts. However, trauma was not their complete story. The data also revealed that they engaged in self-work and reconceptualized love. Their reconceptualized love is one that resisted erasure and dehumanization. The final finding, I call Deep Mirror Pedagogy, or the culminating journey from trauma to healing, consists of five components: 1) Recognizing Critical Incidents and Impact of Trauma, 2) Engaging, Investigating, and Interrogating Impacts of Trauma, 3) Resisting, Redefining, and Re-conceptualizing Love, 4) Getting to Unapologetic Wholeness and Completeness, and 5) Becoming and Doing “The Work” for self and community. These findings suggest that love must be redefined, and it must be stripped of heterosexism and racism and formed into a love that does not perpetuate violence but cultivates healing. This has implications for teachers and educators specifically working with historically marginalized populations and effectively meeting their needs. viii TABLE OF CONTENTS Page ACKNOWLEDGMENTS ................................................................................................. v ABSTRACT ..................................................................................................................... vii LIST OF TABLES ........................................................................................................... xii CHAPTER 1. INTRODUCTION ............................................................................................... 1 Significance of Study/Problem Statement ................................................. 2 Purpose of Study ........................................................................................ 4 Research Questions .................................................................................... 5 Summary of Argument .............................................................................. 5 Overview of the Chapters .......................................................................... 7 2. LITERATURE REVIEW .................................................................................. 12 A Critical Theory on Love ....................................................................... 13 Race, Gender, and Patriarchy .................................................................. 17 Power and Justice ..................................................................................... 21 Heterosexism and Moving Toward a (Black) Queer Theory of Love ..... 24 Critical Theory of Love: Renewed Visions ............................................. 26 Meeting the Demands of Black Queer Justice in the 21st Century .......... 28 3. METHODOLOGY ............................................................................................ 31 Research Questions .................................................................................. 31 Overall Design and Rationale .................................................................. 31 Participant Selection ................................................................................ 33 Participant Summary ................................................................................ 34 Human Subjects and Ethical Considerations ........................................... 36 Confidentiality ............................................................................. 36 Positionality ................................................................................. 36 Data Collection Method and Management .............................................. 37 Data Analysis Procedures ........................................................................ 38 Procedures for Addressing Trustworthiness ................................ 39 ix 4. BLACK QUEER TRUAMA AND THE IMPACT OF RACISM, HETEROSEXISM,
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