^ P i t r n

iViVM * . ‘Fargo’: murder, mayhem, Indtx Ed-Op I and someone getting shot Datebook is in the face. 1! Ent«rtainintiit Classifieds 20 THETMANGU page 24 Entertainment 24 Volume 7I.Numb«(21 PMicWphU. Pfnnsylvjnii March 15,1996 The Student Newspaper at Drexel University Copyright 01996 The Ttl»ogl«

Drexel stuns M em phis

Duy Pham The Triangle Students in Calhoun Hall celebrate during Drexei's 75-63 upset victory over Memphis in the first round of the NCAA Tournament. The win was the ficst ever for Drexel in the tournament.

Andrew Ross and 15 rebounds to stun the Number 12 seed,” said Rose, the second half. "They just lined up and TRIANGLE STAFF WRffER Memphis in the first round of the “but to come in and do what we Besides Rose’s performance, whupped our fannies, plain and As the seconds ticked down NCAA’s Men’s Basketball did is remarkable. I’m proud to Drexel got three treys each from simple,” said Memphis head and Drexel got closer to its 75-63 Tournament. The win was Dre- be a part of it.” Jeff Myers and Mike DeRocckis, coach Larry Finch. win over Memphis, you could xel’s first-ever NCAA Tourn­ What was remarkable about and a 4-7 shooting performance Drexel now advances to play hear the shockwaves all the way ament win. Memphis, the Num­ what the Dragons did? Not only from Chuck Guittar (2-3 for Big East powerhouse Syracuse in from Albuquerque to Phila­ ber 5 seed in the West Regional, did they beat Memphis, they beat three-pointers). a second-round game on March delphia. was favored over the Number 12 Memphis soundly. The Tigers Drexel also held the Tigers to 16. T ip-off is scheduled for The Dragons used 9 for 18 Dragons. fell behind early, faced a ten- .397 field-goal shooting, and held around 7:00 p.m. three-point shooting and senior “This was just amazing for us point deficit at halftime, and Memphis scoreless for a ten- center Malik Rose’s 21 points to come in as an underdog, with never came closer than that in minute stretch around halftime. • See Sports, page 16

Hot new800 number could be WKDU wattage Adam Blyweiss watts comes after seven years of Jersey alone could increase from TRIANGLE STAFF WRITER off-and-on negotiations with the 78,491 people to 205,499, based WKDU 91.7 FM, Drexei’s stu­ FCC. The resulting signal on U.S. Census data. dent-run radio station specializ­ strength and range could more While the signal still would not ing in independent and under­ than double WKDU’s listener cover parts of the city, primarily ground music, has gone off the base. Northeast Philadelphia, listener­ air before. The station’s directed broad­ ship would also increase outside But the shutdown scheduled cast at 110 watts stretched from the station’s effective range. for the weekend of Friday, March the western and southern Phila­ “The FCC’s definition of effec­ '"'SW 15, may herald good news instead delphia suburbs into Camden tive range was based on 50 per­ of any problem. and Cherry Hill, N.J. The 800- cent of the people receiving a sig­ WKDU needs the downtime watt signal will increase the width nal 50 percent of the time,” said to set up and test a new antenna of the WKDU broadcast to about Chris Sarris, WKDU’s engineer­ atop Van Renssalaer Hall. If the 21 miles, reaching into more dis­ ing consultant. “Now, there are Federal Communications Com­ tant New Jersey cities including better receivers and a much larg­ mission finds the antenna’s per­ Marlton and Runnemede. er percentage of signal recep­ formance up to the station’s pro­ Communications Technol­ tion.” posed standards, the station ogies, Inc., a Marlton broadcast “Right now, I can usually get Adam Blywtiss the Triangle could use it to broadcast at 800 engineering consulting firm the station until the Street Road watts within the next month. working with WKDU, estimates exit [on 1-95],” said management WKDU DJ Pete Fasolo during his show, 'Drug Music.' The resulting signal The power increase from 110 potential listenership in New See WKDU on page 2 strength from a power increase could more than double the station's listeners. University The Triangle • March 15,1996

THE TRIAHGLE After seven-year wait WKDU Established 1926

Editorial power increase on the horizon Editor-In-Chief John Gruber Managing Editor Patricia O'Brien Ed-Op Editor Jonathan Poet WKDU from page / can better penetrate into build­ broadcasted on or near WKDU’s The broadcast proposal Sports Editor Francis Wisniewsid ings. It can also send the station’s frequency of 91.7 megahertz. accepted by the FCC is a com­ Entertainment Editor BradWibie Comics Editor Sean Murphy information systems senior Seth signal farther beyond the larger WMPH 91.7 PM of W il­ plex one, requiring a special Photo Editor Noah Addis Soffer, WKDU’s general manag­ effective range. mington, Del., WBMR 91.7 FM directional antenna from Italy. Wire Editor Nick DIFranco er. That means WKDU’s broad­ of Telford, Pa., WSRN 91.5 FM Fairbanks and Soffer said that Reception of the station’s sig­ cast signal will still weaken the of Swarthmore, Pa., WDBK 91.5 the antenna, including installa­ nal outside the effective range further it moves away from FM of Blackwood, N.J., and tion, cost between $15,000 and Administration depends on everything from Drexel, but it will travel a longer Philadelphia television station $17,000. Production Manager L^rry Rosenzweig The antenna will send out an Business Manager Kristi Ciliano other stations’ broadcasts to distance before it disappears WPVI (Channel 6), all filed Business Administrator Michael Karam weather conditions, according to entirely. requests for WKDU to change 800-watt signal generated by Advertising Manager Gina Di Vincenzo Soffer. According to Fairbanks, the the directed broadcast range it WKDU’s new transmitter, pur­ Oassltieds Manager Jonathan Mullen “Some areas are still not going station first submitted a power proposed. chased last year with help from Distribution Manager Ryan La Riviere to get us in,” he said. increase proposal to the FCC in Each challenge filed -with the the Division for Student Life and However, listenership in the 1989. FCC required WKDU to rework the Undergraduate Student city and outside the broadcast The construction application its broadcast application, then Government Association’s Stu­ resubmit it to the government dent Activity Fee Allocation staff Writen range should increase, according was challenged a number of Adam Blyweiss, Anh Dang, Stacy Lutkus, to Sarris. An 800-watt broadcast times by other area stations who agency. Committee. Karen Ostrowski, Andrew Ross, Jason Woefner

Columnists Michael Busier, Christopher Hatch, WKDU before WKDU after M. Scott Smith, Mike Thornton

Photographen WKDU effective 110-watt signal and direction WKDU effective 800-watt signal and direction . Scott Millard, Duy Pham, Mitchell Steinberg Bucks Montgomery Bucks M ontgomery M vw tisin g Design County ../■ County County .. County t Kristen dson Cartoonists y ' '''••'"s. Thomas Dunlap III, Don M. Haring, Jr, Milboume T. Monkey, Ian Rkkert, Alyssa Wexel

Contributing Staff Eric Minbiole (Top Ten), Jonathan Mullen (Datebc^, Burlington dark) Santoni Pstribution) County Business Staff Sayle Harua John Wackes

Systems Staff Joe Campbell, Dave Mays

Camden County Contact Information Afa//: The Triangle 32nd & Chestnut Streets Philadelphia, PA 19104 P/wne. (215)895-2585 fox (215)895-5935 E-mail: st91 hn34@dunx1 .ocs.drexel.edu

Flyers, Sixers and arenas for sale? Copyright ©1996 The Triangle. No work herein may be reproduced in any form, in whole or in part, without the written con­ Local cable power Comcast and fitness guru Citing unidentified sources, owner of the QVC home shop­ sent of the Editor-in-Chief. WIP said Spectacor, the Flyers’ ping service. Opinions expressed within are not neces­ Pat Croce could end up on top of a huge sarily those of The Triangle. The Triangle is parent company, would operate Flyers team president and published Fridays during the academic sports deal. Nothing's official, though. both arenas. general manager Bob Clarke said year, except during examination and vaca­ Snider would retain a minori­ he had no information about a tion periods. ASSCXIIATED PRESS tion, first reported the possible ty interest in and run the hockey deal. The Triangle's only source of income is advertising; funding from the University is Comcast Corp. has reached deal Thursday afternoon. team. Comcast would run the “It’s too big for my imagina­ not accepted. agreement in principle to buy “The Inquirer News Tonight,” 76ers and fitness guru Pat Croce tion,” he said. The Triangle is free to members of the controlling shares of Phila­ a Knight-Ridder news program would have a minority interest in The news comes just months Drexel community, but distribution is limit­ delphia’s professional hockey on WPHL-fV, reported the deal ■the basketball team, WIP report­ before completion of the $210 ed to one copy per reader (iniciuding mon­ keys). and basketball teams and both would make Snider minority ed. million CoreStates Center, where Subscriptions may be ordered for $20 for major indoor sports arenas in a owner of the Flyers and part- WIP talk-show host Howard the Flyers and 76ers will start one year; display and classified advertising deal worth more than $500 mil­ owner of the 76ers. Eskin estimated the price of the playing next season. The 21,000- inquiries may be placed at the addresses or lion, according to published and Flyers spokesman Mark as-yet unsigned deal at more seat arena, adjacent to the phone numbers above. broadcast reports Thursday. Piazza said he knew nothing of a than $500 million. “I am Spectrum, is scheduled to open The Philadelphia-based cable possible sale. extremely confident in the in September. television firm would buy 60 per­ “I literally have no informa­ sources,” he said. Sales of high-profit luxury cent of the Flyers hockey team tion,” he said. "It’s all news to The Courier Times reported boxes at the new arena have been Colophon from Ed Snider and the entire me.” the agreements are imminent strong for the Flyers, but slower Hardwaro 76ers basketball team from A source, speaking on condi­ although the deal itself would for the Sixers. The Triangle is produced using Apple Harold Katz, the Bucks County tion of anonymity, confirmed to take time to close. Rumors of a possible sale of Macintosh and Power Macintosh comput­ Courier Times reported in ers. Images are digitized with a Nikon The Associated Press that the Snider has owned the team the Sixers have swirled for years. Coolscan negative scanner and an Apple Friday’s editions. Flyers were negotiating with since 1967-68 when the National But Katz has kept the team, Color OneScanner. Proofs are printed to a Both the CoreStates Spect­ Comcast to sell the hockey team. Hockey League expanded from whose 13-49 record through Hewlett-Packard LaserJet 4si MX; final boards are printed to a Hewlett-Packard rum, where the two teams cur­ But Snider was quoted by six to 12 teams. Snider is second W ednesday is second worst LaserJet 4MV. rently play, and the CoreStates “Inquirer News Tonight” as only to Chicago Blackhawks’ record in the NBA. Attendance Softw art Center, their $210 million new denying he planned to sell. chief William Wirtz in owner this year has been the worst in Page layout is designed using QuarkXPress. home arena scheduled to open in Officials at Comcast, the seniority. years. Images are prepared for reproduction using Adobe Photoshop and Ofoto. Text is September, would also be pur­ Sixers and Spectacor, the Flyers’ Comcast sponsors the U.S. The Flyers sit in third place in set in Adobe Minion and Myriad typefaces. chased by Comcast. Spectacor, parent company, did not return Indoor tennis tournament at the the Atlantic Division of the Snider’s sports management calls Thursday evening. Comcast CoreStates Spectrum. NHL’s Eastern Conference, company, would operate both president Brian Roberts’ home Comcast also provides cellular boasting a 32-21-13 record. buildings. number had been temporarily communications, home satellite They often play to sellout WIP-AM, a sports radio sta­ disconnected. television and is the principal crowds. o Don'i Slack your old Triangles in a giant heap * under 1-95; recycle them instead. The Triangle • March 15,1996 University

D rexel to ad op t recycling program

Patricia O'Brien son, under the NRI plan recepta­ Jefferson joined Drexel’s facil­ tangelo Hauling, Inc., charges on requirements of the law,” said Jonathan Poet cles would be located throughout ities department in October of average $125 per ton of waste Jefferson. TRIANGLE STAFF campus and NRI would collect 1994. Before a recycling vendor hauled. NRI will haul the recy­ Jeffrey Brace, the recycling The University is about to sign the recyclables at a central site on could be chosen, “labor issues clables for nearly $83 per ton. committee chair of E.Y.E. Open­ a contract witli National Re­ campus. Jefferson said the site had to be resolved. That takes a Jefferson estimates 50 percent of ers (Ethics, You and the Envi­ cycling Institute (NRI). In early has not yet been finalized. while. ... The University’s legal campus trash will be recycled. ronment), the student environ­ April, NRI would provide recy­ Since a 1994 revision of the review took a long time.” NRI will collect clear and col­ mental group at Drexel, accom­ cling services in 15 of the City of Philadelphia’s Com­ Jefferson expects that NRI ored glass, aluminum, steel and panied Jefferson to select NRI. University’s buildings including mercial Regulations, Drexel has would begin the recycling pro­ bimetallic cans, plastics, high- Jefferson visited one of NRl’s the dormitories, the CAT build­ been in violation of the city’s gram in the first week of April. grade office paper, newsprint customer. Colonial Penn Insur­ ing and Lebow. recycling code, which requires All campus buildings would be and corrugated paper. The city ance Company in Trooper, PA. According to ServiceMaster’s on-site separation of recyclables. phased into the program. code mandates that three materi­ “1 spoke to the director of facility Director of Facilities Manage­ The University was never cited According to Jefferson, Drex- als be recycled. “(The NRI plan] there and he was very pleased ment at Drexel Charles Jeffer­ for violation of the code. el’s current trash hauler, San- complies with and surpasses the with NRI,” said Jefferson.

Dragon Shop robbery yields $10,000

Jonathan Poet as the attendant was leaving for dant called the Creese Student “[Cash America] did it the The suspect was described as a ED-OP EDITOR the evening. According to a Information Desk. The staff long way,” said a security guard 5-foot-9-inch male, 25 to 35 The Dragon Shops in Mac- Drexel security report, the sus­ there then called the main securi­ on the scene, “They called [the years old, short hair and a mus­ Alister Hall have brought several pect reportedly removed $10,000 ty base and security personnel Creese Student Desk] and then tache with a dark brown com­ new services to Drexel’s campus. cash from the store. were sent to investigate, accord­ the security base was called. plexion. He was seen wearing a One thing they probably weren’t The suspect fled the scene, but ing to security personnel and a There were two guards sitting beige “Fila” jacket. expected to bring was crime. the attendant was unable to Creese Desk worker. right [at the entrance to The shops have been open Just before 6:00 p.m. on determine where the suspect This happened despite the fact MacAlister Hall].” since mid-February. Currently, M onday March, 11, a man, went. No other witnesses were that there were security person­ Police from the 18th District the Drexel Barber, a florist, a claiming to have a gun, threat­ reported. nel on duty at the entrance to were called and are handling the copy center and the check cash­ ened a Cash America attendant After the robbery, the atten­ MacAlister Hall. investigation. ing center occupy the shops.

WE CANT MAKE Y O U C O M E

..b u t w ouldn't it be nice If you did?

Triangle Monkey knows you want to come. He knows that you will feel better if you do. So why don't you? Every Monday at 5:30p The Triangle holds a staff meeting in our office at 3010 MacAlister Hall. Triangle Monkey always comes. If you're interested in joining our staff, you should too. We eagerly welcome anyone interested in writing, editing or touching Triangle Monkey. It's that easy. Just come. Tell us what you're interested in doing. And we'll even feed you with free pizza (plain, white, pepperoni and monkey dung).

THE TRIANGLE 3010 MacAlister Hall 895-2585 Local The Triangle • March 15,1996

Tires beneath road set 1-95 ablaze Wayne Woolley Complete repair of the section north of the central business dis­ McNally said Sandra Feitelson ing. After that, crews will have to ASSOCIATED PRESS of highway that carries an aver­ trict. It spread to an adjacent of Wynnewood owned the tire- replace two 112-feet-wide, 63- A fire set in a massive pile of age of 150,000 cars a day will take tire-recycling complex that has recycling complex. Messages left feet-long sections of the road. illegally-dumped tires burned six months, said PennDOT sec­ been cited at least a half dozen at her suburban Philadelphia Repairs are expected to cost at out of control for nearly five retary Bradley Mallory. times in the past two years for home were not returned Wed­ least $1.5 million, Mallory said. hours early Wednesday, destroy­ “It’s going to be a very diffi­ safety violations, including illegal nesday. At one point during the ing a tire-recycling complex and cult proposition to restore traf­ storage of .tires and improperly Feitelson has been fined morning rush hour Tuesday, badly damaging Interstate 95. fic,” Mallory said. stored flammable materials, $5,050 since the first violation traffic was backed up for 11 miles Pennsylvania Department of The fire broke out at about according to Tom McNally of the was issued in April 1994, accord­ north of the fire. Transportation officials said a 1:30 a.m. in a fenced-in area city Licenses and Inspections ing to city records. City officials braced for the one-mile section of the heavily- owned by PennDOT under the Department. The fire destroyed a 150-by-75 possibility of several more days traveled highway will be closed highway in the city’s Port Fire Capt. Henry Dolberry foot warehouse in the complex. of traffic nightmares. until at least early next week. Richmond section, about 5 miles said arson investigators deter­ It was packed with used tires in “The local people are going to mined the fire had been set in the all three floors and the basement. know the sidestreets and ways to tires under the highway. Interstate 95 was closed short­ avoid the problem,” Giraldi said. It took about 150 firefighters ly after the fire started, forcing “It’s the out-of-towners that we — and roughly 30,000 gallons of rush-hour commuters to detour worry about.” I ■ ■ VHIANOVA UMVERSfTY water a minute at the height of along small sidestreets around The Southeastern Penn­ the fire — to bring it under con­ the mile-long stretch of closed sylvania Transportation Author­ QIADIMR trol just before 6:30 a.m., said highway. ity was planning to run addition­ vnomoitADiMR ISmniiiBr acting Deputy Fire Chief John "Things were pretty messed al trains and buses along the lines cooisn Grugan. The flames flared up up for a while,” said Officer that link the city and its north­ again just before 6 p.m. and offi­ Thomas Giraldi of the Police eastern suburbs. cials said it would take several Department’s highway patrol “We’ve also been calling SBSSiDDSHG division. churches, business and anyone days to ensure that the fire was IBVnOIG else who might allow us to use DflTi BUSINESS ENGINEERING out for good. PennDOT engineers said the OMBtt Mallory said criminal charges flames destroyed concrete their parking lot,” said SEPTA MATHEMATICS of risking a catastrophe were underneath the road, exposing spokesman Ron Patton. C O M PU T E R SC IE N C E filed last month against two and weakening steel support Amtrak spokeswoman Maur­ NATURAL SCIENCE laborers who were caught dump­ rods. een Garrity said that one addi­ SOCIAL SCIENCES ing tires under the highway. “The reinforced rod is literally tional passenger car will be y . T H E A R T S EDUCATION Andy Warren, PennDOT’s drooping,” Mallory said. added to two trains that run <^COUNSELING HUBCANITIES regional administrator, said it He said the highway will not through 30th Street Station dur­ LANGUAGES NURSING was unclear where the dumpers reopen until workers are able to ing rush hour in anticipation of worked. support the road with a scaffold­ increased commuter demand. I CONTINUOUS REGISTRATION until the dav before each session begins.^ SEPTA REGISTER NOW! Foreign Graduate Students SES810N 1 SESSION II EVENING SESSION Wednesday, Nay 29 Friday, Jane 28 Wednesday, Nay 29 fUtalf AssocMtes, an established p la n s fo r to Wednesday, June 26 to.Tucsday, July 30 to Tuesday, July 30 comt ___J For S m itm BvOwtin. trrA*; S U m e n SESSIONS OFFICE Or. U you pnfm. a l t Tradt a ru sh h o u r An Equal Oppettun«yUniv«nily | (610)519-4343 s fk tt graduate -6330 c ru n c h e s to t ASSOCIATED PRESS fintipt schoUrt ^YoflS- Raah/^emtes The regional transit agency fv M iu lm w m Summer Sessions Office said Wednesday it was taking I Vinanova,PA 19085-flR steps to handle a surge of riders I Please mainw a currtflt Summer BulMin in a cross-cuhural marketing expected because of a tire fire that has partially closed Inter­ I Name. stwfy. Mi participants I state 95. I Address____ wiU be paidfor their time. Southeastern Pennsylvania A s ’ s " A r E s Transportation Authority said it jj^ity/State/ Zip------^ F:*port Mftnagement Company would increase rail passenger cars and parking spaces along selected routes and extend some ticket office hours. Commuters were urged to use the Market-Frankford Line or regional rail routes R2 W ar­ minster, R3 West Trenton or R7 Trenton. SEPTA said it was looking for additional parking areas within OPPORTUNITIES FOR CO-OP AND SEMESTER STUDY IN walking distance of the West Trenton and Trenton terminal lines. The city of Philadelphia also is adding police patrols to help DREXEL UNIVERSITY IS PLEASED TO speed key surface lines feeding ANNOUNCE A PROGRAM TO PROVIDE the Market-Frankford Line at Bridge-Pratt Terminal. NEW CO-OP AND SEMESTER STUDY SEPTA is adding extra service OPPORTUNITIES IN JAPAN. on bus routes 20 and 66, which J a p a n serve the Market-Frankford Line. Full-time or part-time undergraduate or graduate students in SEPTA also recommended Engineering, Science, or Information Studies can apply. Each use of the Fox Chase-Newtown shuttle bus, which connects with applicant must be a U.S. citizen or permanent resident but need regional rail route R8; bus routes not be enrolled in a co-op curriculum. 127, 128 and 129, which connect with regional rail route R7 TO APPLY: Applications on hand in the Trenton; or bus route 130 which Main Building, room 225B or call Marie DREXEL connects with regional rail route UNIVERSITY Scheb at 895-2499. R3 West Trenton. For more information you can contact s e p t a ’s telephone information center at 215-580- 7800. The Triangle • March 15,1996 National Police parties under fire House panel OKs

Pete Yost ample evidence of shocking, added. ASSOQATED PRESS racist, licentious and puerile Once, a checkpoint was set up role in Taiwan WASHINGTON — Some behavior,” said the report. to stop cars to prevent blacks participants at the annual “Good It said four blacks who attend­ from attending. Racists signs John Diamond Rep. Bill Young, R-Fla., chair­ o r Boys Roundup” gatherings ed one or another of the gather­ were hung by some officers, the ASSOCIATED PRESS man of the national security for law enforcement officers ings over the 16 years felt intimi­ report says. WASHINGTON — A House panel, said he opposes the China engaged in such lewd, drunken dated by the events. Other blacks The suspended FBI agent had panel recommended a bill resolution. and disorderly behavior that the were invited but did not attend told a man planning to join the Wednesday urging the United “It was a prospective declara­ few women present feared they for the same reason, the report FBI, “Great, we need more good States to defend Taiwan if tion of war,” Young said. “I’m might be assaulted, the Justice said. white guys like you in the attacked, even as a U.S. admiral not prepared to do that.” Department reported Tuesday. However, the instances of Bureau.” predicted an easing of tensions Although the Clinton admin­ In graphic detail, a report by improper behavior, “as shocking The report also recommended between the United States and istration has not endorsed the the department’s inspector gen­ and upsetting as they were, were that discipline be considered for China. House action, Bereuter said eral described instances in which by no means characteristic of the a former employee of the The nonbinding resolution Assistant Secretary of State participants defecated on stage as roundup,” Justice Department Immigration and Naturalization approved by the House Inter­ Winston Lord and other senior part of skit, pulled down the inspector general Michael Service who initially withheld national Relations Asia Pacific administration officials have told trousers of colleagues, walked Bromwich told reporters. from investigators important subcommittee said the United him privately that they “welcome around nude or touched woman The report said 44 Justice information about racist conduct States “should assist in defending an unambiguous statement from inappropriately. Department employees attended at the roundup that he had wit­ (Taiwan) against invasion, mis­ the Congress of our support to One retired officer exposed over the 16 years, as well as 150 nessed. sile attack or blockade by the defend Taiwan against aggres­ himself with his badge pinned on to 200 Treasury Department In most cases, the Justice- People’s Republic of China.” sion.” his private parts and ‘‘public employees. One FBI agent was Department employees who With the full committee In a show of force, the USS nudity was commonplace,” it suspended for five days without attended the roundups were scheduled to take up the resolu­ Nimitz is steaming toward the said. pay for making a racist statement either unaware of misconduct or tion Thursday, the measure Western Pacific, joining another “Remarkably, we found no at the event. Ten FBI agents in aU learned that organizers already could come to the House floor by U.S. aircraft carrier battle group one in attendance who appeared attended the roundups. had taken action to respond to it, next week. Rep. Doug Bereuter, off the coast of Taiwan. to be offended by” most of the The IG said it found no evi­ the IG’s 220-page report con­ R-Neb., the subcommittee chair­ Adm. Joseph Prueher, com­ nudity “or who sought to curb dence that the 43 other Justice cluded. man, predicted it would pass mander of U.S. Pacific forces, it,” the report said. Department wprkers participat­ The report said half the Justice with more than 350 votes. The said in an interview that the car­ One of the more than 50 ed in any “raciist or other mis­ Department participants did not Senate is working on its own rier would not approach the women who attended the event conduct while at the Roundup.” go to any roundups after 1988. measure relating to the China- Chinese forces — and might not said her breast was grabbed on Justice Department officials Public drunkenness was the rea­ Taiwan tension. be needed. one occasion and someone said they were able to identify at son many department employees flipped up her skirt, but no other least 400 of the 1,400 participants gave for not returning to the instances of actual assault were in the event over the years who roundup. found, the report said. were local, state or federal law “Unlimited access to beer 24 Beginning in the late 1980s, enforcement officers. hours a day led to extreme strippers were brought in to per­ The report included informa­ drunkenness,” it said. ROMARIO'S form, while in earlier years, tion from women and blacks Thirty-six of the 44 DOJ attendees participated in a “Beer who attended the gathering. employees were department Enduro” contest to see who “The treatment of women at employees at the time they PIZZA could guzzle the most beer. the campground was degrading,” attended the roundups. Eight While roundup organizers said the report. “Women ... went to the roundups before & officially discouraged the strip­ reported demeaning language, becoming department employ­ pers, “their efforts to exercise inappropriate touching and fear ees. control were half-hearted at that some of the drunks would The roundups came to best,” said the report. assault them,” it said. national attention last year when Some news accounts last year “We found little evidence of news stories reported it was a of actions targeting blacks at the concern” by the event’s organiz­ whites-only gathering of Bureau annual event in southeastern ers “in the later years when the of Alcohol, Tobacco and Tennessee were overblown, but objectionable conduct” toward Firearms and other federal law W i r t ^ s “our investigation revealed women “became pervasive,” it enforcement officers. The beet; deals on c a m p u e i

Lunch ~ Diikner HOURS M o n , — Thurs. 10:30 am to 1 am F ri, — Sat 10:30 am to 3,i)0 am Sunday 12 pm to 1 am

E a t -I n , T a k e -O u t , D e l i v e r y The Resident Student Association would like to thank all those who 3 5 1 3 L a n c a s t e r A v e n u e helped to make our 2 2 2 -7 1 3 5 17th Annual Monte Carlo Night ■. a huge success. / We esf^cially thank the Drexel University Departments, Student Organizations, and Local Businesses listed below for their generous E D 'S E D 'S donations: 5 0 H ™ g s ij 40 v m GGS Campus Activities Board (CAB) The Franklin Insjtitute 7-11 LARGE P]P lllN V U 2 A Drexel Pagers & Cell Phones Califomia.Pizza Drexel Pizza $11.75 II CMTice of Residential Living Powelton Pizza Mad Greek’s II $14.95 MUSTFMSEKTCOUFON. I ■ ' Plesident Fapadakis Bassett Turkey Subway CANNOT BE COMBINED WnU OTHER I I CANNOT BE COMBWBD WITH OTHER . Vice President for Student Life Village Pi77A Saturn Club OFFEU. OFFBM. Marriott Dining Kelly Hall Govt. Zii^rhead ^ EXPIRES 4/5/M EXPIRES 4/5/96 D.U. Bookstore New Tower Hall Govt. McDonald’s D.U. Barber Shop Cosmo’s, Pizza Cinnabon Aunt Annie’s Pretzels McGovern Flowers r------1------1 University of Cards Myers Hall Govt. R om ario'sl R om ario^sl Charcuterie Francaise AMC Theatre Pizza Pizza —I 1 Large cheese ;e pies * p iz z a ^ I 7 5 I MUST FRESENT COUFON. MUST FRESENT COUFON. | CANNOT BE COMBINED WITH OTHER CANNOT BE COMBINED WITH . OFFERS. OTHEROFFERS. • EXPIRES 4/5/96 EXPIRES 4/5/96 I The Trian^e • March 15,1996

D ear Students:

O n behalf o f the O ffice of A lum ni R elations, I am pleased to announce that the

G eneral A lum ni A ssociation B oard of G overnors has authorized the solicitation of applications for tw o prestigious scholarships to be aw arded this M ay.

T he first is the A lum ni Leadership Scholarship. A ll applicants for this scholarship m ust be juniors in good standing and m ust have a 3.0 cum ulative G .P.A . at the end o f the fall 1995 term . R ecipients w ill be selected on the basis of leadership dem onstrated through participation in U niversity activities, and involvem ent in conm iunity organizations and activities.

T he second scholarship is the A lum ni Legacy Scholarship, aw arded to the son or daughter of a D rexel U niversity graduate. A ll applicants fo r this scholarship m ust be children of D rexel alum ni/ae and be pre-juniors, juniors, o r seniors in good standing as o f the fall 1996 term . R ecipients for this scholarship w ill be selected on the basis of overall scholastic achievem ent, student activities, and com ­ m unity involvem ent. A pplicants for this scholarship w ill be judged in conjunction w ith applicants for the A lum ni Leadership Scholarship. Furtherm ore, if the first runner-up for the A lum ni Leadership Scholarship is judged to possess qualifications superior to those of the top applicant in the A lum ni Legacy Scholarship, such schol­ arship w ill be aw arded to the first runner-up of the A lum ni Leadership Scholarship.

T hose students w ho have already been aw arded a full tuition scholarship are not eligible. T hese scholarships m ay only be applied tow ard tuition/expenses incurred in the fall 1996 term . Y ou are invited to apply for either scholarship by picking up an application form and returning it to;

O ffice o f A lum ni R elations, A ttention: Scholarships

D rexel U niversity, M ain B uilding 309

3 1 4 1 C hestnut Street

P hiladelphia, P ennsylvania 1 9 1 0 4

A pplications received by F riday, A pril 5,1996 w ill receive priority consideration.

Finalists m ay be required to interview w ith the Scholarship C om m ittee, and the selected scholarship recipients should plan to accept their aw ards during the B lue &

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If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to call us at (215) 895-A L U M .

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D irector of A lum ni R elations The Triangle • March 15,1996 Local Z o o o ffic ia ls We're looking CIGNA Systems is recruiting people to help connect us to the 21st century. CIGNA Systems is part of CIGNA — a lead­ ing provider of insurance and related financial services. We •operate and maintain the technological infrastructure that blame for a new supports CIGNA's eight business divisions and three staff divisions worldwide. CIGNA Systems is looking for business technologists who have a passion for client/server applications, telecommunica­ g u a r d s tions, LANs and WANs. We seek professionals who understand breed of that it's these technologies that support business today and in Christopher McDougall the 21st century. ASSOCIATED PRESS You are invited to: Despite a fatally bungled CIGNA's Technology Career Fair wiring job and a top-level deci­ Date: Saturday, March 16, 1996 technologists. Location: CIGNA Headquarters sion to dismantle a smoke alarm system, Philadelphia Zoo offi­ 1601 Chestnut Street, 3rd floor Two Liberty Place, Philadelphia cials pinned the blame for the Time: 10:00 a.m .-4:00 p.m. worst tragedy in American zoo history on two late-night security Come to our open house If unable to attend send resume to: CIGNA Systems, University Relations, TLP-46 guards. for full-time and 1601 Chestnut Street, Philadelphia, PA 19192 The guards “failed to take rea­ summer internship (215) 761-2213 sonable and appropriate actions or visit us on the World Wide Web at: when they smelled something opportunities. http://www.cigna.com burning in the immediate vicini­ C ig n a CIGNA is an equal opportunity employer. M/F/D/V. ty of the World of Primates "CIGNA" refers to CIGNA Corporation and/or one or more o f its exhibit,” said reports oh the Dec. A Business o f Caring. subsidiaries. Most employees are employed by subsidiaries. 24 fire released Wednesday by both the zoo and its board of directors. Zoo officials said telephone logs showed the guards were making calls when they should have been making rounds the night that 23 rare gorillas, orang­ utans, lemurs and gibbons died of smoke inhalation. “They only called the fire department at the end of their shift, when they saw open flames,” said Philadelphia Zoo President Alexander “Pete” Hoskins. By that time, lowland gorillas John and pregnai Samantha, their 11-month-old daughter Maandazi and the 20 other pri­ mates already had died. Hoskins acknowledged it was his decision to deactivate the zoo’s faulty central warning sys­ tem in 1994 and to rely, instead, m i on isolated local alarms scattered Most Pt^ular throughout the vast facility. When operating, the central i z z a system immediately printed a STAO'RANT report at the zoo’s main gate and BBQ Pizza in the administration building when smoke was detected. But 387-1213 Taitf it & y«u'll know why Hoskins said he ordered the 15- year-old device unplugged when it proved unreliable. That left only the two guards on the 5-p.m.-to-l-a.m. shift to spot a fire or any other emer­ Large BBQ Pizza gency on the 42-acre compound. Also, a bullhorn that should have blasted a warning when the fire broke out was found clogged with ice and snow; and red haz­ MV $8.2S ard lights, instead of being open­ ly visible, were installed in a cabi­ net in the basement of a locked building. Hosldns also accepted the fire Small BBQ Pizza marshal’s report that the blaze in the country’s oldest zoo was sparked by a badly installed elec­ trical cable intended to keep the building’s pipes from freezing. $ 4 . t s The cable was secured with dangerous metal clips instead of tape, fastened on the damp lower March Specials I March Specials | March Specials side of the pipe instead of the II 1 drier top, and blocked by duct I work from inspection. City offi­ $1off cials speculate it was rigged by an $ 9 off Buy a !! I unlicensed contractor. ^ a n y ^ i a n y I Even so, Hoskins said, the ani­ Laree Pizza !! mals probably would be alive if II I the guards had followed proce­ Large and get a II Small I dure and made their rounds con­ I scientiously. Free Topping j[ “Since the tragedy, we’ve Pizza Pizza I accelerated our fire safety instal­ offers expires 3/30/96 J offers expires 3/30/% J offers expires 3/30/96 lation plans.” Hoskins said. J 8 The Triangle • March 15,1996

Drexrt. UNIVERSITY

A N N U A l . CAREER FAIR

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Freshmen Sophomores Pr^-Juniors Seniors Graduate Students

EXPLORE a variety of career fields NETTW OKK W TTH PHOBPEjCTIVE EM PLOTEHS INVESTIGATE future co-op and permanent Job opportunities

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Sponsored by Drexel University Career Management Center and the General Alumni Association. The Triangle • March 15,1996 World Worid leaders behind Middle East peace Tcrrence Hunt ington within two weeks to draw caused British Prime Minister process. Palestinian leader Yasser Arafat ASSOCIATED PRESS up recommendations that each John Major and German “We equally and unanimously complained about Israel’s crack­ SHARM EL-SHEIK, Egypt — country can take through legisla­ Chancellor Helmut Kohl to show condemn the violent acts which down, saying it was strangling Shoulder-to-shoulder in a his­ tive and executive actions. up an hour late. took place in Tel Aviv and the the Palestinians’ economy "to toric show of solidarity, Arabs Short on bold steps, the sum­ Gathered around a long, rec­ occupied territories,” he said, the extent of famine.” joined Israelis at a summit of mit was remarkable for the sym­ tangular table covered with green apparently referring both to the “The Palestinian people world leaders Wednesday to vow bolic message it sent of Arabs felt, leaders spoke one by one suicide bombings and to Israel’s should not fall prey to any act of unequivocal support for the standing with Israelis, two with varying fervor, some men­ closure of the West Bank and terrorism,” Arafat said in a call bomb-ripped Middle East peace ancient foes united now for tioning Israel by name, others Gaza Strip. championed by other Arab lead­ process and an unrelenting war peace and against terrorism. speaking more generally about Faisal was the most senior ers. against terrorists. At the airport, there was a the peace process. They spoke Saudi official ever to meet with “Do not resort to despair,” “From all around the world, traffic jam as planes landed, for three hours. an Israeli leader. Away from Egyptian President Hosni Mu­ we have come to the Sinai to deposited their VIPs and hur­ Saudi Arabia’s foreign minis­ cameramen, he shook hands barak, the summit host, told the deliver one simple, unified mes­ riedly took off to make room for ter, Saud al-Faisal, spoke warmly with Peres. Palestinians. "Do not give in to sage: Peace will prevail,” the next aircraft. The aerial ballet of hopes to “energize the peace While condemning terrorists. calls of defeatism.” President Clinton said as kings, presidents, prime ministers and princes — 28 in all — gathered for what was billed as “3ie sum­ mit of the peacemakers.” Israeli Prime Minister Shimon Peres, whose nation was thrown into turmoil by four attacks that killed 62 people over nine days, was visibly moved by the out­ come. He spoke of watching “with an unbelieving eye” as former Arab enemies pledged to end the scourge of terrorism. “They are the most impressive leaders of our time,” Peres said. “It’s a big deal,” Clinton said of the summit. Afterward, Clinton and Peres flew together on Air Force One to Israel. On Thursday, Clinton will visit the grave of slain Prime Minister Yitzhak Rabin and deliver a speech of sympathy and support for Israel as it grieves the deaths of men, women and chil­ dren in the bombings. Clinton was accompanied to Egypt and Israel by CIA Director John Deutch and Secretary of State Warren Christopher. When Clinton returns to Washington Thursday, they will remain behind to work out an anti-ter­ rorism and intelligence agree­ ment between the United States and Israel. The hurriedly arranged meet­ ing in this Red Sea scuba-diving resort was aimed at wresting the momentum from the suicide bombers of Hamas whose attacks stunned Israel and left the peace process in tatters. ^ “This terrorism is not anony­ mous,” said Peres said. “It has a name, it has an address, it has bank accounts. ... It is spear­ headed by a country — Iran. Tehran has become the capital of terror.” Yet, the summit’s final com­ munique did not single out any country by name. Instead, it pledged to crack down on terror­ ists by cutting them off from financing, arms, recruitment and safe havens. Notable by his absence was President Hafez Assad of Syria, a nation accused by Washington of supporting terrorism yet a key player in the Middle East peace process.. Clinton said he wished the Syrians had attended but added: “I wouldn’t overread their absence here. It’s part of a gener­ al pattern of going their own way.” The leaders pledged to rein­ force the peace process with political and financial assistance and with special attention to the “current and pressing economic needs of the Palestinians.” They also pledged to convene a working group to chart “maxi­ mum efforts” against terrorists. Delegates are to meet in Wash­ 1 0 The Triangle • March 15,1996

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'v' The Triangle • March 15,1996 National/World 1 1 Experts see ex-Soviet nukes as m ajor threat.

According to a report of weapons proliferation, the remnants of the beyond control.” ed by one or two people. Harold Johnson Jr. of the Sarah Mullen, head of the Soviet nuciear arsenal are being sold by amateur profit-seekers. General Accounting Office said Nuclear Black Market Task much of the 1,200 metric tons of Force at the Center for Strategic Jim Abrams U.S. national security today,” Allison’s book and the find­ highly enriched uranium and 200 ASSOCIATED PRESS and International Studies, agreed Graham Allison, co-author of a ings of other scientists were metric tons of plutonium pro­ with Johnson that there is no evi­ WASHINGTON — Security Harvard University study, released at the Governmental duced by the Soviet Union is dence yet of an active black mar­ breakdowns, abysmal record­ “Avoiding Nuclear Anarchy,” Affairs Committee hearing on stockpiled in 80 to 100 facilities ket or the entrance of organized keeping, poverty, corruption and said in Senate testimony. the proliferation of weapons of in Russia and six other newly crime groups. porous borders make the former Those who understand the mass destruction. The consensus independent states. Most thieves, she said, appear Soviet Union fertile ground for nuclear leakage threat, he writes was that the risks of nuclear But the exact amount is to be “opportunistic amateurs” smugglers of weapons-grade in the book, “generally accept the smuggling were real and increas­ unknown, he said, because of the among the thousands of nuclear- nuciear material, scientists said judgment that the risk of a ingly urgent. lack of accurate inventories, and related workers who are desper­ Wednesday. nuclear detonation on American Sen. Dick Lugar, R-Ind., said the material is “highly attractive ate to feed their families and hear Americans should “recognize soil has increased” since the end America “will have a problem of to theft” because it is not highly tales of “fabulous sums” to be this as the number one threat to of the Cold War. proliferation that is literally radioactive and can be transport­ made by selling nuclear material. ditorial pmion Page 12 March 15,1996

John Gruber Editor-in-Chief Jonathan Poet Ed-Op Editor THE TRIANGLE Editorial Board Noah Addis Photo Editor Kristi Ciliano Business Manager Letters to the Editor Nick DiFranco Wire Editor Canadians are French. Fur­ beer on her for no apparent rea­ Gina Di Vincenzo Staff Writer 'Sports Dog' barks Patricia O'Brien Managing Editor thermore, and 1 am pretty sure son. Out of nowhere one of his Lany Rosenzweig Production Manager true about this one, not all Canadians friends grabbed me by the throat BradWible Entertainment Editor play hockey. In fact, some and threw me up against the wall. Editor: Canadians don’t even like hock­ When I stared into his eyes I had I would like to applaud the ey. But that did not stop the man no clue what his next move was sports editor for his “Sports with the Drexel cape from mak­ going to be, and that terrified the Dog” feature in the March 8 edi­ ing these points, over and over. hell out of me. Maybe I’m more Shell it out tion of The Triangle. 1, too, have I fmd broad, slanderous gen­ pissed off that I froze up and had had the unfortunate opportunity eralizations such as these to be no reaction other then to get my It*s hard to believe that basketball pundits the world-over may to sit next to the MCS Society at contemptuous, and the people male friends to see if they could now know Drexel by name. Drexel’s shocking victory over the a Di-exel basketball game. who utter them even more so. I help. University of Memphis on Thursday has propelled the Dragons My experience was at the first sincerely hope that Mr. Eames This is a reminder to all the and head coach Bill Herrion into the national spotlight. round of the NAG playoffs in does not do what this Drexel stu­ males out there who think it’s Last year, Herrion was courted by Duquesne University. He Delaware. Drexel was playing dent did. I would hate to have OK to assault a female. How turned them down, saying that his work at Drexel was not fin­ Hartford. One of Hartford’s him draw broad conclusions were they brought up with such ished. With Thursday’s in, it could very well be. And that’s great. starters, Chris Eames, is from about Drexel students based on disrespect towards the other sex? We couldn’t be more proud of our team or our coach. Canada. I was sitting next to a the behaviour of this one stu­ Wake up you disgusting fools. But this off-season may bring even more rumors of Herrion very vocal member of the MCS dent. Females are humans with rights moving on to bigger and better things. We want the best for Society v ^o took every opportu­ 1 would hate for Mr. Eames to and feelings. We fight for our Herrion and his family, but we want him as our coach. nity to remind Mr. Eames of his think that all Drexel students are status in this society with no easy heritage. uneducated, xenophobic mor­ breaks and we’re sick and tired of Therefore, we charge the University with keeping Herrion here, Now, I am sure that'Mr. ons. being assaulted because we are no matter the cost. Eames is proud to be a Canadian. Jason Coady easy bait. Every single team that makes it into the NCAA tournament is I doubt, however, that Mr. Appropriate Technology '98 I’m not saying that these inci­ given money for every game in which they appear. The Eames wanted to be reminded of dents only happen at parties. University should load up Herrion’s pockets with cash, and keep his heritage in quite the way this They happen on the streets and ( Cbem that way. It’s one thing if Herrion decides to move on Drexel student ^o se to do it. Physical assault at even in relationships. Females because he can’t get the respect he deserves in a program at Every time Mr. Eames had the must start to stand on their own Drexel’s level, but it would be absolutely inexcusable if Herrion ball, took a shot or was caUed for party inexcusable two feet. If that means taking a were lost to another University because they would offer him a foul, the Drexel student, who is defense class or packing when more money. Herrion’s presence at Drexel is worth the cost — a easily identifiable by the cape he Editor: you go to parties, go for it. Don’t price tag can’t be put on national media exposure. wears, would yell, “Frenchie!” — I am a female Drexel student accept their apologies because as in “Go home, Frenchie!”, who has been here for the past they are probably fronting just to “You suck, Frenchie!”, etc. two years. This past weekend was get out of trouble. Sometimes, though, this witty my first encounter with physical Lastly, females, if you are This time ifs for real student would demonstrate his assauh. assaulted, tell the authorities and It seems like every 18 months or so we print an article about great knowledge of Canadian I was at a party at an unnamed get them into serious trouble. culture by yelling some other fraternity here on Drexel’s cam­ Don’t be afraid of them. This Drexel’s latest attempt to implement a full recycling program. enlightened phrase, such as-, pus. I was dancing with my kind of man is only a worthless Well, we’re hearing it again. However, this time around it isn’t “Take off the skates!” or “Put h*iends when a situation started person who use his fists instead just rhetoric or proposals. No, this time a contract is ready to be him in the penalty box!” between my friend and some fra­ of his mind. signed and Drexel is ready to do recycling — the right way. 1 could be mistaken, but to the ternity brother that neither one Eileen Augustyn We applaud ServiceMaster for committing themselves to this best of my knowledge, not all of us knew. He started throwing Undeclared '98 and getting through all the bureaucratic red-tape to get a plan implemented. It was no easy task. We also com m end E.Y.E. Openers for their consistent support in getting a recycling plan implemented. As a result, Drexel will have a program which exceeds that M ichael B usier: The Prolocutor required by law. But, responsibility ultimately falls on those who dispose of the trash. While specifics are still being hammered out, it is important for students and faculty to remember to sep­ arate their trash. That’s the only way the plan will work. New gasoline tax is unfair

Recently, Pennsylvania Gov­ increases. The only examples of Social Security payroll tax. Once ernor Tom Ridge has suggested this are federal and (in some an income earner has paid the raising the tax on every gallon of cases) state income taxes. The maximum dollar amount, he is Submission Policy gasoline purchased. The tax is logic is simply that those who free from additional tax liability. being raised from 22 cents to 28 earn more should pay dispropor­ As a result, the tax rate as a per­ Guest columns, letters to the editor, and artwork may be sent to the cents to pay for needed repairs to tionately more. Progressive taxes cent of income declines as attention of the Ed-Op Editor, The Triangle, 32nd and Chestnut Sts., highways. place the burden of taxation on income increases. Those taxes Philadelphia, Pa. 19104. They may also be sent via e-mail to He apparently feels that the tax the upper classes. place the burden of taxation on st92^jd3@>dunx1.ocMlr«xtl^or delivered in person to 3010 MacAlister should be levied in proportion to A proportional tax, like the the lowest classes. Hall. a taxpayer’s use of highways, lliis Philadelphia wage tax is one All taxes on consumption All submissions must include a name and phone number and should can be determined (or at least where the tax rate is constant at (sales tax, taxes on cigarettes, include an address and appropriate affiliations such as major, year of estimated) by the number of gal­ all levels of income. The logic gasoline liquor, etc.) are regres­ graduation, or organizational position. Anonymous submissions will not lons of gasoline a consumer pur­ here is that those who earn more sive taxes. T hat’s because as be published; authors' names will only be withheld under special chases. This seems fair, but is it? should pay proportionately income increases, the portion circumstances. There are three basic classifi­ more. Here the burden of taxa­ devoted to consumption decreas­ cations for taxes: progressive, tion is the same for all classes. es and the portion devoted to Written pieces should be presented on disk in MacWrite format. The regressive and proportional. A regressive tax is one in savings increases. Since the tax is deadline for submissions is 5:00 p.m. on Wednesday of the week of Progressive taxes are ones in v^ich the tax rate (not necessari­ based on consumption, the rate publication. The Triangle reserves the right to edit for space, ■ -ammar, which the tax rate (not just the ly the dollar) decreases as income falls as income goes up. In other clarity and com ^ ...... tax dollars) increases as income increases. An e'xanaple is the See Busier or) next page The Triangle • March 15,1996 Opinion 1 3

M . S co tt S m ith : Static Across the Lines D iscovering th e history of textboolcs

It is with great trepidation that I look that the bookstore makes no less than 1.3 take a history class once, so I’m qualified pivoting strategies, let alone what a pivot­ upon the coming of the spring term, million dollars per textbook using this to make something up. ing strategy is. Also, many didn’t know because, as usual, it means I will have to strategy, inflicting countless numbers of The blame lies entirely on Plato, how to speak or write, and a few thought shell out a significant portion of my life paper cuts in the process. because he’s been dead for awhile and isn’t that potatoes had some type of mystical savings to buy more college textbooks. Now, you might be saying, “Scott, that likely to complain if we blame textbooks property. College textbooks are unique because seems a little high,” but trust me. I’ve (and soybeans and Bill Gates and that silly This was later disproved in 1580, when they are worth more than their weight in taken lots of math classes and even know Buchanan character) on him. it was published in a colK ge text that, gold. They are written in such a way as to what a pivoting strategy is. In theory, it’s possible Plato wrote the although potatoes could sing, they were make simple subjects incomprehensible, Of course, I do have some friends who first college textbook, on the subject of are actually vegetables. (Tho second edi­ and they are also usually written by a never buy textbooks. They have discov­ pivoting strategies. Those of you who have tion of this text corrected the error: pota­ friend of the instructor. ered that the bookstore has a return policy. had linear algebra have probably heard of toes don’t really sing, unless they’re refrig­ College bookstores have a clever way of They will buy a textbook a couple days pivoting strategies, and might actually erated.) throwing salt into our wound: they’ll buy before an exam, study, and then return the know what they are if you ever sat down Before determining what adequate piv­ our textbooks back at the end of the term. textbook for a full refund. and read that expensive book you paid for. oting strategies could be, mathematicians (They also stuff all those annoying maga­ I’m not recommending that everyone Prior to 1400, mathematicians didn’t first had to coin the word “pivot,” and that zine subscription cards in your books - do this. No. If I were to do that, the book­ realize they might some day need pivoting required the creation of the Latin lan­ and in your shopping bag, in case you store would send its mercenaries after me strategies, because most of them spent all guage, so that “pivot” could be derived missed liie 20 in your book, resulting in an and I wouldn’t much enjoy that. their time quoting Shakespeare and bet­ from it. enormous number of paper cuts.) But, even so, did I mention how many ting money on horses at the track. During Unfortunately, few people spoke in This isn’t such a bad thing, on the sur­ people buy a textbook right before an one of these betting events, Plato decided Latin, except some priests, and they had face. After spending $100 on a textbook on exam and then return it two days later? that many as-yet-unknown mathematical no interest in pivoting strategies whatsoev­ Guam Literature, why complain that the Some people are squirming right now, problems could be solved if only some er. So.initial progress in the area of pivot­ bookstore offers $1.47 to buy it back at the afraid that I’ve tipped the bookstore off, type of pivoting strategy could be created, ing strategies was slow. Soon, textbook end of the term? Why? Because they turn and that the bookstore will adjust its and that by writing about it, he could make authors resized that they could skip writ­ around and sell it for $95 the next term, to return policy to include provisions for a lot of money and meet lots of babes. ing the difficult portions of their texts, all the people who failed Guam Literature people who return books that will likely And thus began an era in scientific his­ leaving glaring problems and omissions as the previous term. This is sort of like hir­ bre£^ international laws of wartime cover­ tory — “The era of searching for really “exercises for the reader.” ing a real estate agent to sell your house, ing torture. good pivoting strategies so that unknown and she sells it for $200,000, but only gives Who can we blame for expensive, bor­ problems could be solved and textbooks M. Scott Smith ([email protected]) is a you $20. Actually, I’m not sure how it’s ing, incomprehensible college textbooks? could be sold.” This preceded “The era of senior majoring in computer science. Let the like that at all, but you get the point. An examination of the history of textbooks going to neighboring countries and beat­ bookstore mercenaries know that he never Although the details are a little is revealing. Actually, I know nothing ing the smithereens out of everyone.” returns textbooks, and even absent-mindedly involved, I have proven, mathematically. about the history of textbooks, but I did At first, few knew how to come up with buys books for classes he's not taking.

M ichael K ellan On The Job Raising Thinking about the audience, and Penna.gas looldng for a Drexel internet provider tax is unfair Busier from previous page I just picked up a copy of the Shot Before A Live Studio from hell. It can get pretty ugly if (Web pages, e-mail, etc.) to March 1 issue of The Triangle, Audience you don’t have a very good sense alumni. The people I spoke with words if you consume 1,000 gal­ where my column ran for the first One of the nice things about of humor. And a thick skin. in the computer center said that lons of gas a year and pay a tax of time. What a rush! The editors working in an office is that no When I first got the idea to only active students an faculty 28.5 cents per gallon, you would gave me a glowing introduction matter what you do, there’s write this column, I thought top­ can get accounts — alumni are pay $285 per year. If you earned (none), placed my piece above a always an audience. If you finish ics would be hard to come by. out of luck. One helpful person $10,000 a year in income, the tax clueless AT&T ad on page 11, an important project, or get a big Well I was wrong. I’ve got plenty did give me leads to several local rate would be 2.85 percent. If you and called me a budding colum­ contract, you have friends to help to write about. But the problem is providers with inexpensive ser­ earned $50,000 in income, the nist. celebrate the event over lunch. that those same ideas, which for­ vices, but I was suprised that tax rate would be 0.57 percent. In newspaper speak, I believe I When the project falls through, merly occupied the darkest Drexel ignores the alumni in this So the lower income earner feels was given the kiss of death. or you don’t get the promotion, recesses of my (admittedly cloud­ respect. the effects of the gas tax more Just joking. Actually, I’m there are plenty of shoulders to ed) mind, are now exposed to the Now the university doesn’t than the higher income earner. extremely pleased. The/ve given have to offer us anything for free. That’s the problem with me a corner all my own, and they I know how expensive it can be Governor Ridge’s proposal. let me write about whatever I to maintain a system for students While it seems to be fair and a want. and faculty alone. But why not good idea, it places the burden Believe me, seeing your name strike a deal with local providers on lower income earners, who on a by-line is a very heady expe­ to offer alumni accounts at a dis­ are certainly less able to afford it. rience, no matter where you get count? Or spend the time and We need a fundamental printed. And the best part is, they money to allow alumni phone change in tax revenue philoso­ never asked for a snapshot to access to the Drexel system, and phy — one that raises enough place under the by-lihe. (As then charge a small amount for revenue to balance the budget in you’ve probably guessed, I don’t usage? a manner that is fair, equitable photograph very well.) Tliink about the possibilijties. and consistent. A simple flat rate Now if I play m y cards right, I Instant access to Drexel alumni tax on all income (no matter how could be the next Dave Barry through e-mail. Instead of pay­ it is earned) would work nicely. (hopefully) or Rush Limbaugh cry on. You even have a sounding harsh light of day. ing for expensive advertising to Governor Ridge is to be com­ (hopefully not). My writings board to test your ideas, so you People can see them. People fiood alumni mail boxes with mended for realizing that might eventually influence mU- don’t make a complete fool of can read them. Including the requests for donations, you could increases in government expen­ lions of impressionable young yourself with upper manageipent. ones I work with. Boy, are they simply Spam us. Automatic ditures must be paid for by minds during their formative col­ Unfortunately, that same are going to have a field day with updates to the alumni directory. increased tax revenue. lege years. The insightful com­ group of friendly, helpful people me for the next few months. Bulletin boards for alumni and Unfortunately his idea of raising mentary I pen on the workplace will turn on you in a heartbeat. students to interact, or discuss the tax on the amount of gasoline could inspire a whole generation Have a fight with a co-worker? A Modest Proposal job prospects. consumed unjustly hurts the of Drexel students to become Others in your office are more Why doesn’t Drexel offer its I can’t think of a better way to lower income earners. It is time better engineers, managers and than willing to grab a ringside alumni an Internet connection? encourage alumni contributions to be more consistent. A single corporate officers. seat, and then provide post-fight Working for Uncle Sam, I’m than by offering Internet connec­ flat rate tax on all income which Then again, I could just as eas­ analysis to the rest of ^ e office. fully plugged in — Usenet, the tions. raises enough revenue to match ily get hauled into court for pla­ Get dressed-down by the boss? Web, e-mail, you name it. In fact, if I were an enterpris­ the state’s spending require­ giarism. Oh well. They say that The rumor mill will be more than Unfortunately, since the account ing young computer-type look­ ments would work and would imitation is th t sincerest form of happy to pass along the juicy is supplied by my employer, I just ing for a senior design project, a allow us to do away with virtually flattery. details, using all the technologic^ can’t cruise for my own enjoy­ Drexel-based alumni provider all other taxes — a great idea at I do wish the editors hadn’t means at its disposal — voice ment. So now I’m searching for could be just the ticket. It might all levels of government. use the term “budding colum­ mail, fax and e-mail included. an inexpensive provider which even be a money-making propo­ nist,” though. They don’t realize In an instant you become the has a fast connection, and is not sition. Mkhatl Buskr is a two-time graduate what they’ve done to me; I won’t not-so-funny fill-in for AOL or an AOL clone. of Drexel currently pujrsuing a Ph.D. In be able to show my face at work I^tterman, and they become the Well, I contacted Drexel to ask Midiatl Ktiar is a graduate of Drexel economics. He is i j >r Phil*delphla again for weeks! NBC Late Night studip audience if ^ey could provide any services working for the Navy. BuHetin column^ ^ 1 4 Opinion The Triangle • March 15,1996

M ike Thornton: Iconoclastic L e m m i n g Audio equipm ent is Wke the drug scourge

When I was younger, I had a the background, it was OK — it biggest, loudest and coolest with my two receivers, six speak­ changer that didn’t buzz. See, it’s little crappy boom box. And I was cool. I had my slab of card­ sound system on the planet. My ers, and massive wattage, I was a vicious circle! was happy. I could listen to my board in the garage, and I could stereo seems to be continually ready to face my co-op term with And no matter how big yours tapes in it and record off the tiny do a nasty windmill and snake. I evolving into a bigger beast daily. full musical enjoyment. is, you will always come across built-in microphone. If I didn’t was the breakdancin’ dude. If my It wasn’t enough to just have one But there was a problem. With someone whose dwarfs yours. have a certain song on tape, and I parachute pants were any larger, I receiver. Oh no, I had to get a all of the bass from the sub­ It’s jealously at its finest. didn’t have enough money, 1 could’ve blown away if a strong new surround sound, full Dolby woofer, the music just didn’t Oh yeah, did I mention I’m could just hold the ghetto blaster wind came along. Pro Logic, make-my-ears bleed, sound anywhere near the quality living in a condo while I’m on up to the TV and record the But all that happiness changed barely-legal, decibel-of-a-fighter- that it should’ve been. co-op? My neighbors are either mono static. Hey, I was mix mas­ one day when I was introduced to jet receiver (Silo was going out of So, I went out and bought an deaf, old, scared or a combina­ ter Mike, with tracks from The A- the wonderful world of audio business). So, I gave up the old equalizer. But the equalizer tion of the three. I still haven’t Team all the way through “Jam receivers. one then, right? Wrong again. I brought out the hiss from my 6 been able to turn up the volume On It.” And it didn’t matter if my Since that fateful day, I have took it and converted it into a disc CD changer. Then, I had to past 6 without stuff flying off of tape had hiss or people talking in been obsessed with getting the sub-woofer amplifier. Armed go out and get a better 6 disc the wall. Having a nice system, though, is only as good as the music you play through it. This Pandora’s Box opens up the whole new arena of CDs. Have you ever got­ ten a CD just for one song? Been there, done that, got a T-shirt. And when you finally get to show off your system, you end up playing some ambient techno crap and end up saying, “Hey man, you can feel the bass rattle your balls.” “Yeah man, cool.” How stupid. Who w ould’ve known (or wanted to know) that when you crank Simon and Garfunkel you can cause the plaster on your ceiling to col­ lapse. Seriously, you can get the same feeling sitting on a washer (not that I’ve ever tried that or anything). But having a nice system does have its benefits. You can create a concert in your own room. I wouldn’t recommend moshing by yourself though, it can get pretty ugly — especially when you stage dive. Another great thing about having a decent sys­ tem is the all-powerful ability to annoy the crap out of anyone within listening distance. I rec­ ommend playing Wilson Phillips or some country crap, personal­ ly* You could always simulate an earthquake if you’re in the D e x t e r ^ s not his usual self. dorms. Also, yo,u might try recording the fire alarm and blasting it at, oh, say four in the Y o u s u s p e c t t h e salsa. morning. But I only recommend doing this if you’re really big. So you call D r. N 'ushlutt, y o u r f a m i l y vet back hom e. If you get hooked on high quality audio, it’s like getting used to some good heroin (so T h e c a ll i s c h e a p . I’ve heard, of course). Once you have the best, you can’t go back to the old stuff. And if you are (T oo bad about the CO U SU ltCltion f e e . ) forced t-o have some old stuff, you vomit. But, I guess that there are worse hobbies to have, like chainsaw juggling for instance. At least with stereos, you won’t I oi l c ampus.'' Si”ii up lor ALsLl I vitc R cd ch Sw\'\Wfi,s ' A\\i\ sa>c 23 lose an arm and a leg — at least no m atter who, how, when or where not right away. \()u t all ill the- r.S. Mike Thornton is currently on the pro­ fessional bumper-bowling circuit.

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I “ The Triangle • March 15,1996 1 5 eOlNG SOUTH FOR SPRING BREAK? Drug warning: Rohypnol or "Roofies”

•Small, white 2 mg tablets have made their way to south Florida •The drug, a sedative 10 times stronger than valium, is sometimes called the “forget me” drug •1 tablet in combination with 1 beer will induce extreme inebriation, including loss of control, possible hallucinations and a memory “black-out” the next day •Acquaintance rape victims have reported that the drug has been slipped into their drinks at parties, bars, etc.

Be safe by taking responsibility for your own safety Sponsored by the Office of Student Health Services & Programs

The Public Relations Student Society of America F is h f a n s ! STAND OUT FROM THE CROWD! Great Full Dead f a n s !

Develop public relations and Bloo's Traveler f a n s ! communications experience while networking with professionals. n new organization is forming to commemorate and iis- ten to tliese great bands. Ule’ii m eet once a month and haue discussions and interaction dealing uiitli tliese uerg M e e tin g s : influential bands. Come Join us! W ednesdays, 5:00 p.m. M acAlister Hail, Room 5051 Call us. A ik for Gary. For more information, call 895-1823

DOKOUWANTA

THE TRIANGLE

The Triangle gives free ads to officially registered student organizations. If your student organization would like a free ad, drop off the camera-ready ad at The Triangle, 3010 MacAlister Hall> by Wednesday at 5 p.m. for Friday publication. Incluiife the name of your student organization and a contact name and phone number. The ads must be 4 8 inches wide by 33irKjhes tall. Do not put a border around the ad. The Triangle will not guarantee placement of submitted ads. S p o rts

March 15,1996 Page 16 THE TRIANGLE Dragons advance

Malik Rose scored 21 in the biggest win in DrexeibasketbaU history. Next, they face Syracuse, who beat Montana State 88-55.

Andrew Ross the last four years and we’re not STAFF WRITER an outsider anymore,” said On March 14, Drexel’s men’s Myers. basketball team did something “They just lined up and it’s never done before. They won whupped our fannies, plain and an NCAA Tournament first- simple. You come out lacklus­ round game. What’s even more ter,” said Memphis’ Finch, “and amazing was that in beating think you’re going to put your Memphis 75-63, the Dragons shoes out there and ... it’s going looked like the No. 5 seed and to happen, then you’re going to Memphis the No. 12 seed. It was get beat. I think that happened to actually the other way around. us.” “It was a great win for our pro­ Memphis shot an abysmal .397 gram,” said men’s basketball and that enabled the Dragons to head coach Bill Herrion. "I think open the second half with a 15-0 the kids really deserve an awful run. lot of credit for playing hard and Drexel’s win is the first NCAA staying with the game plan.” Tournament win by a North The Dragons were led by Atlantic Conference team since Malik Rose’s 21 points and 15 Siena defeated Stanford in the rebounds. “It’s hard to whup a 1989 East Regional. Drexel’s win possesed man,” said Memphis is its 15th straight and its 23rd in head coach Larry Finch. “We its last 24 games. were sending three and four guys Rose’s 21 points put him over in there after the rebound and he the 2,000 career point mark and still kept coming away with it.” his 15 boards puts him at 1,499 Drexel’s record is now 27-3, career rebounds. while Memphis falls to 22-8. Next up for the Dragons is Drexel was also helped out by number 4 seed Syracuse. The .500 shooting from the three- Orangemen crushed Montana point line (9-18). Mike DeRoc- State 88-55; earlier in the season, ckis found the shot that deserted Drexel won at Montana State 68- him early in the North Atlantic 62. Conference Tournament and Syracuse is ranked number 14 went 3-for-5 from three-point in the USA Today/CNN poll; land. Jeff Myers was 3-7, and Memphis was number 17. Chuck Guittar was 2-3. M emphis is the highest- Myers contributed from places ranked team beaten by the other than the three-point line. Dragons since they beat David His five assists and three steals Robinson’s Navy team at the led the Dragons. Palestra in the 1986-87 season. Cornelius Overby also had a . Rose went down with a minor great game, going 8 for 9 from ankle injury midway through the the free-throw line to help Drexel first half. While Overby was ice the win. shooting two foul shots, Herrion “Maybe this will help push us pulled Rose allowing the trainer to the level of the Big Five. Our to tape his ankle during the tele­ Noah Addlst The Triangle respect level has been going up vision timeout. The Dragons were one of three major upsets in the first day of the NCAAs. Underdogs Princeton and Arkansas also won. Heavyweight Huntington qualifies for nationals

Anh Dang staff and for the athletes as well. Senior 126-pounder Brett didn’t work out for him.” Nardone went on to win hi« TRIANGLE STAFF WRITER They trained harded all season, Kendall ended his Drexel career Seeded third, 118-pounder weight class and was voted the The Drexel wrestling team but they’ve got to learn to arrive in a downer. Kendall was Brian Tashner recorded a fall in tournament’s most outstanding placed sixth out of ten at the East to the level to compete.” wrestling with a sprained left his first match, but then lost as performer. Padovano recovered Coast Wrestling Association Huntington was last year’s hand throughout the tourna­ major decision to the second seed from the loss to win the rest of Chfimpionships held on March league champion at heavyweight ment. The top seed in his weight in the second round. Tashner this consolation matches to claim 9-10. The school’s only top seed, but came to the tournament class won his first match to also lost his consolation match to third place. “I’m disappointed 1 126-pounder Brett Kendall was seeded third. Huntington won his extend his winning streak to eight finish his freshman season at 21-8 didn’t qualify for the nationals, inj Jicd and lost in his second first two matches 7-1 and 5-2 matches. He activated his injury overall. but I’m pleased that 1 came back match. Heavyweight Jamie respectively. In the final he lost 9- and lost to an unranked oppo­ Junior Padovano was seeded to take third,” said Padovano, Huntington was Drexel’s only 2 to the top seed Bill Tassogloy of nent in sudden death. Kendall is third at thel34 weight class. who finished 22-9 for the season. finalist and NCAA qualifier. Rider. The second place finish 23-11 for the year and 67-44 for Padovano dominated his first Freshman 142-pounder Jon “1 was very disappointed. was good enough to send his collegiate career. “It’s a shame match but was out-wrestled in his Clark lost his first round match There is no way that we’re the Huntington to the NCAA that he got injured,” said team­ second. His opponent, second 4-1. He won his first consolation sixth best team in the confer­ Division 1 National Champi­ mate Corey Padovano. “Brett seed Emilio Nardone of Seton match with the fastest win by fall ence,” said Coach Jack Childs. “It onships held March 21-23 in wrestled with a lot of heart all Hall, “had me off-balance,” said recorded by a Drexel wrestler this was frustrating for the coaching Minneapolis, MN. season and [the tournament] Padovano, who lost 14-5. See Wtestling on page 17 The Triangle • March 15,1996 Sports 1 7

Drexel single Drexelcareer Basketball preview Grapplers finish season records records Men vs. Men's scoring Men's scoring season on low note 1. Michael Anderson 670 1. Michael Anderson 2208 Syracuse (25-8) 2. John Rankin 662 2. John Rankin 2111 Wrestling from page 17 11-9, for his first consolation 3. Malik Rose 616 3. Malik Rose 2013 Sat. 7:00 p.m., 4. Len Hatzenbeller 589 match and then lost 10-5 to end Men's rebounding Alburque, NM season (23 seconds). Clark won an 18-17 season. 5. Malik Rose 584 NCAA 2nd round his second consolation match Freshman Eric McGrath was 6. Michael Anderson 582 1. Malik Rose 1499 because his opponent was dis­ seeded fourth at 177. McGrath 7. Jeff Myers 563 Last meeting: Never played them. qualified, but lost the next in a got through his first match easily, tie-breaker. “I had hoped to do a pinning his opponent. His next Men's rebounding 1. Todd Lehman 285 Syracuse starting five little bit better,” said the 16-16 match was against top seed 1. Malik Rose (94-95) 404 2. Mike Wisler 232 G Lazarus Sims 6.1 PTS 7.4ASTS Clark. Grant Johnson of Boston 2. Malik Rose (95-96) 394 3. Brian Holden 204 G Jason Cipolla 6.4 PTS 1.3ASTS C Otis Hill 12.4 PTS 5.1 REBS Jesse Childs lost to top seed University. “He out-wrestled 3. Malik Rose (93-94) 371 4. Clarence Armstrong 156 F John Wallace 22.0 PTS 8.8 REBS 5. Michael Thomspon 114 and eventual 150-pound cham­ me,” said McGrath. “He was F ToddBurgan 12.4 PTS 6.3 REBS pion Mike Garcia of Bucknell in tough on his feet. He’s one of the Men's 3 pointers made 6. Jeff Myers 92 a fall. Childs went on to lose his best I’ve seen.” Johnson won 7-4 1. Mike Wisler 86 7. Mike DeRocckis 83 Will be missed: Derrick Coleman, I consolation match in a major and went on to claim the title. 2. Todd Lehman 84 8. Chris Arizin 79 know he left a long-time ago, but decision, 9-0. Childs is 6-18 for McGrath came back to win his 3. MIkeDeRocckIs 83 9. Michael Anderson 63 Malik could break his rebounding his sophomore year. two consolation matches for 4. Todd Lehman 82 10. Cornelius Overby 61 record if Drexel beats Syracuse. Sophomore Bill Brown at 158 third place. Todd Lehman 82 was seeded third. Brown won his At 190, sophomore Joe Fazio Streaks: Drexel has won 15 straight games, second longest in the country. first match, 11-7, but lost 7-5 to had a tough weekend. He lost his Sports Dog Syracuse has won six of its last seven; his next to the second seed Babak first match 4-2 and gave was shut the loss being to UConn in the Big East Alimorandian from Boston out 7-0 in the consolation. Fazio Malik Rose Memphis final. is 9-20 for the year. University. He lost his consola­ Jeff Myers 1 don't normally taunt people, but N3, tion match 6-3 to end his season For the tournament, the team Na, Na, Na - Na, Na, Na, Na ■- Hey, Hey, Bonus: Syracuse is well known as the Cornelius Overby at 25-10. scored 40.5 points to finish sixth Hey - Goodbye. biggest choke team in the NCAAs. In Junior 167-pounder Adam out of ten teams. Host Rider Chuck Gulttar their last five appearances they Hockenberry lost to eventual University won the ECWA tour­ Mike DeRocckis haven't advanced past the sweet six­ champion Chad Liott of Rider. nament by winning six of the ten Brahin Riley Mascot battle teen, even though they've been seed­ Hockenberry squeezed past weight classes. Rider compiled a ed as high as second. George Hudgins Dragon takes on Wildcat Boston College’s Rustace Mita, league record 125.5 points. Ross Neisler In ESPN's battle of the mascots, Analysis: Drexel actually matches up David Frey Drexel is facing Northwestern's better against Syracuse than Memphis. wildcat on voting on ESPNet. Rose's ankle injury should not be a fac­ Greg Gaffney tor. Malik vs. Wallace is the best Go to httpy/www.sportszone.com NCAA all-time rebounding leaders Karl Fischer match-up of second round. Syracuse and stuff the ballot box for the Bill Herrion totally depends on Wallace, if he is Nsme School, (j9me§ Rebs. Drexel Dragon. There are only 16 shut down, Syracuse will lose. 1. Derrick Coleman Syracuse 143 1537 No one deserves this award by mascots in the battle, and we have themselves, and no one in the 2. Ralph Sampson Virginia 132 1511 the most computers. Sometime Sagarin prediction: Syracuse by 5. 3. Malik Rose Drexel 118 1499 world deserves it more than these this week you'll be able to vote for 4. Pete Pa(dgett Nevatda 104 1464 guys. the Dragon, so check everyday. My pick: Drexel by 4. Wait and see. 5. Lionel Simmons LaSalle 131 1429

NCAA first round NCAA W est Regloniai Drexel 75, Memphis 63 Drexel 40 35 — 75 Memphis 30 33 - 63 DRAGONS (75) at Albuquerque, New Mexico fg ft reb mln m-a m-a o-t a pf pts Myers 38 4-9 4-7 0-2 1 15 Gulltar 27 4-7 0-0 1-5 4 10 March 14 March 16 March 22 @ Denver Rose 38 8-12 5-6 2-15 2 21 DeRocckis 37 4-8 3-4 0-0 0 14 Oveiby 39 1-8 8-9 2-5 2 10 1. Purdue Gaffney 1 0-0 00 O-t 0 0 Neisler 4 0-0 0-0 0-1 Purdue (73-71) Frey 7 2-2 0-0 0-2 Hudgins 3 0-0 00 0-2 Riley 5 0-0 0-0 0-0 16. W. Carolina FIschet 1 0-0 00 0-0 0 Totals 200 23-46 20-26 5-33 18 13 75 PcrcinUgti FG .500; FT 769, 3pt 9-89, .500 (Myers 3-7, Gulttar 2-3, DeRocckis 3-5, Overby 0-2, Frey 1-1). Tmhi 8. Georgia Ribounds 2 Blo

Sports Schedule Home games in bold at Drexel field. Saturday 161 Sunday 17 I Monday 181 Tuesday 19 I Wednesday 20 I Thursday 21 12:00 p.m. M-Baseball 11:00 p.m. W-Lacrosse at St Peter's (2) vs. New Hampshire 12:00 p.m. M-Ucrosse vs. Vermont 12KWp.m. M-Baseball vs. Penn IKMp.m. W-SofCball State (2) vs. St. Joe's

7:00 p.m. M-Basketball vs. Syracuse 1 8 Comics The Triangle • March 15,1996

H o r o s c o p e Eric Jt Minbiole

This Week: The Horoscopes were brought to you by on intense fear of doing real work.

Aries (Mar. 21-Apr. 19): Profess your deep emotions by reciting, "Para ti, para ti, mi c o ra z o n p a lp ita com o p ap a s fritas" to that special someone. Taurus (Apr.' 20-May 20): You will make botanical his­ tory when you prove that ferns prefer scotch to water. Gemini (May 21-June 21): Several CIA agents will come to your home to ques­ tion your patriotic loyalty. Five to ten years in Leavenworth are in your future after you mistakenly call one agent, "comrade." Cancer (June 22-July 22): Form a support group for people who shore your intense fear of dental floss. Leo (July 23-Aug. 22): True lo v e o ften lurks in strange places. You may find your soul mote in the driver's seat of a '79 Plymouth Satellite. Virgo (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): Your chances of ever becom­ ing a hand model will be ruined after a tragic cheese grater accident. Libra (Sept. 23-Oct. 23): M ake the most of life's minor mishaps by milking them for all the sympathy you can get. Scorpio (Oct. 24-Nov. 21): Fulfill your childhood dream of being a successful entre­ preneur by buying your very own pretzel stand. Sagittarius (Nov. 22-Dec. 21): Your inability to commit, as well as your deep contempt for mankind can be attrib­ uted to the fact that you Dystopik Snoaen presents the FED, copyright 1996 Don M. Haring Jr. were never breast fed. This summer, look for the FED graphic novel by Slave Labor Graphics in comic and book stores nationally. Capricorn (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): Instead of being a produc­ tive member of society, 1 0 . C o or bind Twister spend the weekend watch­ THE TRIANGLE 9. Dwarf toss ing the entire "Herbie the Lovebug" series. 8 . - Q o s b a Aquarius (Jan. 20-Feb. 18): 7 . ^ ie e a t i n g AAonkees singer Peter Tork T o p T e n 6 . Paper footba will visit you in a dream. In 5. Naked badminton it, he will reveal to you the true meaning of "Daydream 4. Thumb wrest ing Believer." 3. Bumper poo Bvenis N ot Found Pisces (Feb. 19-Mar. 20): a t t h o ' 9 6 2. Beer funne You will b e attacked by a O f y m p h s 1 . Synchronized bear monkey after forgetting b o w i n g to pack the kitchen sink for your next cam ping trip. The Triangle • March 15,1996 Comics 1 9 C r o s s w o r d 25 Gunner's need DOWN 3 4 Customer 01996 Tribune Media Services, Inc. 2 6 Splendid dwelling 1 By reason of 3 7 Pertaining to 2 9 Free 2 Repetition fathers 33 Disconcert ■3 Arab VIP 3 8 ’ Rootless ones 3 4 Chicago players 4 A lessening 4 0 In use 35 With heavy heart 5 Garment part 41 Festive 3 6 Jab 6 Familiar term for a 4 3 Beginning 3 7 Strained food girl 4 4 Kitchen gadget 38 Casino items 7 Part of MIT: abbr. 4 6 Stockholm native 39 Name in Genesis 8 Ball stand 4 7 Upright spar 4 0 Barked 9 Ballet cast 4 8 - vera 41 Hard seed 10 City in Maine 4 9 Butts 4 2 Detoured 11 Hyalite 50 Acknowledge 4 4 Oil colors 12 "Woe-1" 51 Weather word

47 « 4 5 Employer 13 Lighthouse Harry et 5 2 Punta del - tk 4 6 Personal interest al. 5 3 Marsh plant 4 7 Persecuted one 21 Edge 5 6 Lennon's window 5 0 Not alee 23 Ed the singer •1 Um itM um'k SokfMoH 5 4 Sorrowful cry 25 Felt poorly □□□□ □□□□□ □□□□ 5 5 N ew 2 6 Stationary □□□□ □□□□□ □□□□ □DOD □□□□□ □□□□ ACROSS 16 Semicircular part 5 7 Leisure 2 7 Overhead □□□□□□□ □□□□□□□ □ □ □ □ □ □ □ 1 Gwynne or of a church 5 8 "-Like It Hot" 28 L.A. player □□□□□□ □□□□□□□□ 5 9 Battery terminal 29 Attracted, in a □□□□□ □□□□□ □□□ Astaire 17 Of the ear □□□□ □□□□□ □□□□ Cermony □□□ □□□□□ □□□□□ 5 Hit, old dtyle 18 Letters 6 0 way □□□□□□□a □□□□□□ 10 Cook a certain 19 Derogatory word 61 Try 30 Chinese or □ □ □ □ □ □ □ □□□□□□ □□□□□□□ way 2 0 Most joyous 62 Move down Japanese □□□ □□□□□ □□□□ 63 Winter toy 21 Implied only □□□□ □□□□□ □□□□ 14 Georgia city 2 2 Aquiline birds li □□□ □□□□□ □□□□ 15 A fabric 24 A deadly sin 32 Paradise 01996Tribune Media Setvicet, Inc. All Ri(^a Rocnwd

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(ffO ofltd flftvn. hen, you u^tucty^ur pens bzck ? Page 20 THE TRIANGLE March 15,1996 Apartments Apartments Apartments Apartments liMtai Huge artists loft apartment. Hardwood floors, 16 One bedroom 3408 Spring Garden St New reno­ 3331 Spring Garden, 2 bedroom, 3rd floor, living 37th & Baring - Large Bedroom Apt, Modern foot ceilings, alarm system. $375. Art Museum vation, third floor, new ap^iances, paint, carpeted room 11'xlS', bedrooms 12’x12* & 11'xl V, kitchen Kitchen, W/W Carpet, Contemporary design, pri­ The Triangle offers listings in the area. Call Franklin Investment Realty at 382-7368. floors, living room, tile bath, share yard and base­ 12'x8', 5 bioclu from campus. $440 + utilities. Heat vate entrance. Must see! Ask about Free Month. ment. Washer/dryer. Private entrance, economical & Hot Water included. $480 for 3. No smoking/ Call Wood Realtors. 386-2800. ______1 BEDROOM APARTMENTS Wood floors, exposed following categories. gas heat. $450+ available April 1st. 386-6722. drinking. 215-222-6060 or 662-1132. brick, laundry and morel from $400 Franklin Bright, 3-story Victorian complete renovation 6 Br, Newly renovated apartments. 3408 Spring Garden 6 BORM. House. Available April 1.3 baths, exposed Investment Realty 382-7368. 2 tile bath, D/W, central air, huge living room, Apartmtnts St. first floor, front W-level. All new two bedroom, brick, beams dishwasher, W W, WD. 32nd & ctose to Drexel & Transportation. Available June 1 SubIfU Within tvt'o blocks of Orexel Gym: clean, safe tile bath, carpeted bedrooms, interior security Hamilton $1250.382-32ia______or July 1. $1200/mo + Call Robert 625-4995. affordable apts. avail. Some with w/d or deck. bars, economical gas heat, share yard + basement. Apartment for rent. 2 Bedroom. Available immedi- 3839 Lancaster Ave. Newly Renovated, 3 BR, 2 RoomnMtfs Small, well-behaved pets welcome. Call 610-664- Washer-t- Dryer. $550 + available April 1st 386- atelyi Must rent! $575/Month. All utilities included bath house. W/D, DW, skylight, oak floors, alarm 7779. 6722.______For Sale except elec 34th & Powelton. Call 243-0239 any­ system, security bars, available June 1 Pets OK. Huge tvw) bedroom. 3408 Spring Garden St. New Wanted 6 BDRM. house avail. April 1. 3 baths W/W, D/W, time. ■ . $725.00^■ call 386-0532. ______exposed brick + beams W/D. 32nd + Hamilton. Renovation. Two large bedrooms, tile bath, pow­ Text Books 3631 Lancaster Ave- Luxury 2 Br, safe/secure. 34th & Spring Garden Sts. 2 Bedrm apts.. avalL In Call 382-3218______der room, larg^ kitchen, economical gas heat, Central Air, W/W carpet, DW. Washer/Dryer, Services share yard + basem ent. W asher/ Dryer, Living historically cert. BIdg. Washer/dryer in each apt. 3741 Lancaster 3rd FI. Lg one bedroom modern Intercom, garbage disposal. No pets. Call 222- From $600.00 Plus utiL Call 215-386-6450 days; or room. $575+Call 386-6722. 2625. Available S ^tem b er 1 st. Help Wanted Throughout C/A $425 plus utilities Q aude Boni 610-353-5207.______Apartment 1 bedroom, 36th and Baring, plain an 3318 Arch— Huge 2 Br, 2 bath, bi-level. Safe & Lost&Found R/E 473-5900. 37th & Powelton. Large 1 bedroom apt. Available nice, 10 minute walk to campus. Available for secure Dishwasher, carpet, yard. $1260/month, Grey Gables 312 No. 33rd St. 4Bedrms & tile bath April 1 ■ $400 per month. Call 387-6793.______Announcements spring-fall temi. $400/month + utHities. Call 386- includes heat/H W. Washer/Dryer Facilities. No heat & hot water incl. Call nowll Claude Boni R/E 4599 Of Email sg^2mOpostdrexel.edu______Pets. Available Sept 1 st. Call 22-2625. Good for 4. 37th & Powelton. Large 3 bedroom apt. with Personals 473-5900. washers and dryers. $875 per month. Call 387- 3620 Baring St. Studio, 2nd floor front. Bedroom Three bedroom, 15 baths recently renovated row 12'xl3', kitchen 7'x13'. 5 blocks from campus, $370 6793.______home, central air, washer/dryer, hard wood and ' including all utilities. $420 for 2,3 months advance rugs. $620 plus. Available Immediately 657-6657. 37th & Powelton. Large 1 bedroom studio. Placing Classifieds (negotiable) No smoking/drinking. 215-222-6060 Available April 1. $365 per month. Call 387-6793. Of 662-1132. Rooms for rent Just off the Manayunk Wall in Manayunk/Roxbourough. Just 15 minutes from The deadline for placing a classified Sublets pwetst Drexel, just a few block from the Main S t bars and ad is 5:00 p.m. on the Tuesday HOT DATING clubs. 1 i baths, finished basement, front & back­ Rooms to Let. High ceilings, large windows, wash­ before the'ad's publication date. yards. $180/month. Call 482-4417. er, dryer, cfishwasher, porch. One block to campus. 3312 HAMILTON STREET: Efficiencies, one and tvw) Only $250 + per riKXith negotiable. Must see. Call ()0 ad was placed, and the section in '• I M t 11 I M< M II N I < >( .111 11 .it '>St 11 t >,i r 111 which you wish the ad to appear. Be Toll free 1-800-648-4849 GALS call FREE http://www.ststravel.com/ I arm* 1 licclroom S4^-)() sure to sign your name. (215)476-2100 \ .1 r (I \\ .isiuT (Ir \ ( r l> .iti il .il > I M .iiii .istt r 2 ik'clrooiiis S.S‘)() In Person D r e x e l ' s B e s t O n -C a w u s H o u s i n g I I II11 .tl .11 r ,>l I .1 pph.ii II I N I. ,ii ( il .tl ' >11 Place forms in the slot outside The New \ ork 1 ()lt S 1 ()S() Triangle office. LERNER COURT APARTMENTS IMMisij I, , I Miniiv l.'i.ili il ,1| '.'.III I ,111. ,i\li r 120 N 34TH ST / 3409-15 RACE ST Ailist Studio IU-siik‘iKt“ S/57S Mail Contemplating a move, need an apartment now or March/April ‘96? The Triangle CHECK THIS OUT Call 662 1000 Attn: Classifieds Manager We have the best on campus apartments, gas heat, A/C, 32nd & Chestnut Streets carpeting, excellent security. Two maintenance men on premise & house mother. Philadelphia, PA 19104 The only biig you will encounter will be your roommate. . A partm ents to rent at liable I, Z, 3, & 4 bedrooms. We give short term leases.Aval 36th and Powelton Area Fax These apartmcflts-fcalure: .C e n t r a l A ir & G a s H e a t , Walking distance to Univ. of Drexel and transportation (215)895-5935 L a u n d r y F a c il it ie s o n P r e m is e s , E x c e l l e n t S e c u r it y V ery R eso n a ble R ates Rent includes gas cooking, heat, and water Don't W orry, Be Happy and Safe,Live in Lem er Court Place! • Large Apartments •Cable Ready If your ad is a paid ad, a copy of the 886^9999 ® 222-5406 check or money order should be Efficiencies starting at $370.00 faxed and the original should be One Bedroom starting at $430.00 mailed or dropped off in person. They’re going fast- CALL NOW! For appointment call Ron at 387-9960 Costs & Limits DnM9lAd¥9rtis9n O r o u p Cost: Free. Normal ad rates apply for uca personal businesses and apartments. Limits: 2 classified ads per person per issue, with a 40 word maximum .Pbr Trem endouis O pportunity for each. Personals have a 25 word maximum. Ads may be edited. RANAMfil CITY BEACH Graduation li tlmost here! You have big plans and ambitions for a successful future. Consider ^e best opportunity for a hotel and casino career at the Claridge Casino Outsld^Advtrtistn 7 Niofls Beach Front & Djuiy free Drink Pmies Hotel, Adan& City's smaller, friendlier hotel and casino. Our intimate environment Cost: (per issue) $4.50 fof the first 25 I allows you to iusume greater responsibility and adiieve higher visibility. At ^ Claridge, | words and $.25 for each word I you can ieally make a different^ ■ thereafter. Tear sheets are $.25 0f^a^.„from $119 So... plan b%, diink small, and adiieve great diings in one of t ^ areas of opportunitjr: extra. Ads must be pre-paid. Adnunistiation Gaming Hotel Operations Payment can be made by cash, money order or check. Accounting & Finance Marketing Food & Beverage Limits: There are no ad limits or CANCUN...... from $399 word limits for paid classifieds. ATT: GRADS AND UNDERGRADS!! JAMAICA...... from $399 Attend The Qaridtfe Casino Hotel’s Other Information SEASONAL JOB FAIR! BAHAMAS...... from $369 SATURDAY. MARCH 30th. From IQAM to 3PM No classifieds will be accepted over THIRD FLOOR, PALACE THEATER the telephone. FLORIDA (lond Only)/rom $119 Featuring interviews for seasonal positions in areas of HOTEL, CASINO. AND RESTAURANT OPERATIONS! Multiple ads with duplicate subjeas .and Have a Rewarding Summer At The Shoreli will not be accepted unless they are MYRTLE BEACH,SC.... Call paid for. For more Information about Careen eni^or Seasonal Opportunldes Ads may be cancelled, corrected or For more Info call; ^ Contact or Vbit our Hunuui Resources Office continued by notifying the 1726 Pacific Avenue, Atlantic City, New Jersey 08401 classifieds staff by the 5:00 p.m. nduss ummb ows Fax Your Resume to: 609>340-3165 Tuesday deadline. You must E S T Or C«U Our JOB HOTLINE: 800-644^98 include your phone number with your correspondence. 1-800-234-7007’^' ClaridgeCMlnoHold^^ No refunds will be given. Spidig b feritwll Ji BeoHiM Mnalter It MendUor.

Mmimmmmimmmmmmamm The Triangle • March 15,1996 Classifieds 2 1 Sublets Roommates For Sale Text Books Help Wanted Apartment available sprlng-summer terms, $325 a and summer term only. Own room, free laundry, For Sale: Loveseat & Sleep Sofa, Neutral Colors, Strategic m anagem ent and business policy $35, TROPICAL RESORTS HIRING- Entry-level & career month. 202 N.35th St. Comer of 35th and Race St. $220/mo, -f 1/3 utilities. If interested call 571-4831. Excellent condition. Together $400. Separately Society and technology change $15, Human positions available worldwide (Hawaii, Mexico, 222-6329 til 3/23, after 23rd 610-970-2891. Looking for a roommate to share a 2 bedroom fur­ Loveseat $150, Sofa $250. Call anytime before Resource Management $25. Contact Ming 215- Caribbean, etc.) Waitstaff, housekeepers, SCUBA Partially furnished. nished apartment w/ clean, modern and close to 10pm. 632-7109______386-0815. dive leaders, fitness counselors, and more. Call 36th& Lancaster Ave. 1 Bedroom apt. Spacious, campus. Move-in immediately. Call 610-446-7274. Modern black dining room table with a glass top, Resort Employment Services 1-206-971-3600ext. sunny, newly renovated, lots of w in^w s, walk-ln four chairs, like brand new, $80,00 please contact Services fl52801 closets. $395.00/ month. Heat and hot water For Sale Kate at 243-1726.______Moving? Need a van? I'm your man! Reasonable WORK IN THE OUTDOORS- National Parks, Forests, Included. Call 386-7071.______Pro-Sport 3X.65 Stair Stepper 12 tenstons, counts 1988 Chrysler Turbo Lazer Candy Apple Red- rates 3rd HTML, egi scripting. Pearl, Java. Please fax resume DANCE- Sponsored by Hillel- Feasterville- Saturday to (610) 544-8388.______obo. Call Larry at 243-0946.______Edition. Human Resources Management=> 6th March 16,1996.- Beth Hayyim Synagogue- Monte Carlo Dance- call Bonnie for more informatlon- Roommates Pick-up 1985 Chevy S-10, 2.5L EFI, 5-spd manual edition. POM 311=> 5 th edition. Call 215-387- Home Day Care Position Needed- Responsible 895-2531. Roommate wanted for 5 BR house. Near Academic trans. Extended cab with 6ft bed and cap. Am/Fm 4241.______person needed to take care of 4 month old baby Bldg, Myers Hall & Psychology BIdg. Great cassette. Newer tires, recent brakes. PA inspected, Hey do you have the book for.. Econ 201, Fin 350 girl, weekdays 1200n-4:30pm, M-F, April 1st - June Literacy- a skill necessary for survival. Help other to Location. Convenient and safe. $250 + utilities. runs well, dependable. Asking $2500. Call 215- PScI 100? I don't feel like being molested by the 21 St. $5-6/ Hr. Call Karen (215) 763-5805. help themselves by teaching Literacy in the com- Leave message 386-0227. 895-2428. bookstore. Call Mr. Henry 662-0848. Responsible non-smoking, female wanted to Three Seat Brand New Sofa Comfortable and large Chem 241 & 242, Che 217, Hum 101, MCS 121 & share three bedroom apt. near campus for spring $65 Please call 215-386-3643. Pick immediately. 132,MCS170.Call 587-9392.

London 0 $ 1 8 9 ' “life is Paris fiC Frankfurt a cliain Rome Tel Aviv Tokyo Rio reaction Los Angeles UJ ■Fam m ndi vny hcfn tMbddpMi biMd on • louidtiip pu- d««. Fam do IKK nckxk liknl mn or ITCi loanha it «l S4S. dtptnding on detllnallon at dtpmn chaiyn paid (frKdy B fottign 90vtmfflcnts. CiN for firti to olfw worUMidt dMinadani. Cm l R » A FREE Stu d o t Tm ih s magmone! tliat N 3606A Chestnut St. begins Philadelphia, PA 19'T04 (215) 382-0343 http://wwwxie«x>r9'cts/ctshomeiitni witii 'EuRAILPASSES ISSUED on-the-spot!

your.■ ■ ■ Get Your Head Together a 0 ^ Aoartments z WddaKfeisnw ...iiaircolor jp i .stiwashnr ] b lL tid jlQ ______j D (wa «lio r/flrye j $5 off any [<:«i 1.0 U e a d y 1 [ two color service 0 for the month of march r W-W Cnrpyi ] r I

fp.lex TermB | I ^ A Full Service Salon IT 3603 Pow(3ll(3n Avcmku} J.SOO A ve. Philci(i(,'l|)hici, PA 1 91 04 (•.'■nliiiHrr oa 36tli Sli'cct) r 3 8 6 - 3 i 7 7 I'hllrt. I*A (J 387*2274 22 Classifieds The Trian^e • March 15,1996 Announcements Announcements Personals munlty. Special Topic In Literacy Education Teach Grants and Scholarships are available. Billions of compensation available for participating. Contact: 475, Three Credit Required service. For more Info, dollars In grants. Qualify immediately. 1-800-243- Study coordinator at (215) 790-6906. call Linda Arendt x2158 or Sheila Clark x2594 2435 (1-800-AID-2-HELP). ELITE CLUB OF SINGLES INTERESTED IN NUDISM? Spring Break Is coming- have fun & serve others- All the informatk>n you need to get Invohred with Student Community Services & Newman Center _____Personals_____ us. We are a fun social group with local parties and sponsored Alternative Spring Break In Boston, West for gold!! Need rkte # the end of this semes­ gatherings. Membership required. Contact M a rk e tin g March 24-30. Applications now available from 222 ter, will split gas $$$ and driving—Cali 464-8661. Tammy, 8001 Castor Ave. Box #363 Phila, PA Creese or call 895-2158 or 1522. All expenses paid. Love-Tony Really nice guy. 19152.______*What can be avoided whose end Is purposed by Do you Douche? Are you aged 18-29 yrs? Have Gary, Even, Steve, Jay, Colleen, Doug - only a few days fTKHe and we're don another one. — Larry A s s is ta n t the mighty gods? Yet Caesar shall go forth: For you had a vaginal Infection treated with antibi­ these predicttons Are to the world In general as to otics within the past 6 mths? Vanguard Gyn. at the Sarah- Hi there. Caesar.* IIII... st92kw10@dunx1 .ocs.drexel.edu Graduate Hospital are investigating the relation­ I do not like Abba. I do not like the Village People. I If thou read this, 0 Caesar, thou mayst live; If not ship between douching and pelvic infection. do not live In the Hotel California. I do not even the Fates with traitor do contrive. Iliii Complimentary hygiene products and financial understand Andy Gibb. Thank you. Bonnie's Exceptional Ice Cream, a gourmet ice cream company based in Paradise, Pennsylvania, with wholesale and retail IMMIGRATION PROBLEM? operations in the mid-Atlantic states, has immediate openings for 3 marketing assis­ tants in the Center City Philadelphia N o C h a r g e . A ffordable Fees office. For Student V ISA M ajor focus in em ploym ent One of the positions requires fluency in problem s- let us cases and all other aspects Chinese. help you for FREE! of Im m igration. Contact: David Fisher 100 Chestnut St. Office 100 C all Frank B. Lindner, Esq. Philadelphia, PA 19106 (215) 752-4214 (215) 592-8800 Fax (215) 992-6647 L aw O ffices of M artha F. Lindner

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yil\ Bowman St. Cresson Arenas A p r il 1 1996 9 :0 0 am - 6 :0 0 p m From Mohawk, 76, x-iK, Center City. A p r il 2 1996 9 :0 0 am - 6 :0 0 p m & Cityline Ave.: Muteum A p r il 3 1996 9 :0 0 am - 3 :0 0 p m College Nioht Kickoff Party A p r il 4 1996 9 :0 0 am - 6 :0 0 p m A p ril 5 1996 9 :0 0 am - 6 :0 0 p m Wednesday, March 2 0 th Featuring live music by WHEIRE; Living Arts Lounge Creese Student Center Le C o m p t Nightly specials & giveaways For more info call 2 I5 *4 3 8 *I5 0 0 The Triangle • March 15,1996 Entertainment 23 Kidnap the wife Quickies Toothpaste Television Film ▲A A A A AAAA AAAA Mentadent Muppets Tonight Muppet Treasure Island Cheseborough-Ponds ABC, local channel 6 Tim Curry, Frank Ox, Kevin Bishop for the holidays Even the fifth dentist recommends it Fridays at 8:30 Buena Vista Pictures Baking soda toothpastes are suppos­ Cold mother loonies from page 24 Do yourself, and the Coen edly the new workhorses of dental brothers, a favor. Get out there hygiene. Workhorses, indeed — they bags; a host of viciously realistic and see this movie, even if you usually feel like sandpaper and taste violence to satiate all you have to search a little to find it. like glu e. B ut n o t M en ta d e n t. B reath is Tarantinites out there. You won’t be sorry. noticeably fresher, teeth light up dark Lap it up, scumbags. rooms, and the dispenser oozes with And finally, the most interest­ 21 st-century sleekness. Make sure you . ing aspect of the film: a seven- Film don't wet the two 'stream s' of tooth­ month pregnant police chief. paste before you start brushing, You just don’t get to see a ▲AAAA though. Knock one off, and it's just not Fargo film’s protagonist waddle her the same, man. William H. Maqf, Prances way through the movie very McDomland, Steve Buscemi Adam Blyweiss often. It’s refreshing, fascinating Direaed by Joel Coen and original. Gramerqr Piaures It doesn't take much for m e to love a Sure the plot barely follows the actual TV sh o w w ith M ichelle Pfeiffer as th e story, b u t it is still th e M u p p e ts — a n d guest host, but Muppets Tonight had th e y kick ass. All th e c h a r a a e rs are a few other things going for it as well. here: Beaker, the Swedish Chef and All your favorite characters are back, Statler and Waldorf. The jokes are both except the suspiciously absent Fozzi adult hilarious and kid dumb, but Bear. Maybe he couldn't agree on a • •that's w hat makes it great. Kevin A bird in th e cage is c o n t r a a w ith ABC. D esp ite th e lack o f B ishop is OK as Jim H awkins, th e kid Vending Machine wacka wacka wackas, Muppets with the map, but he sounds like a girl A Tonight should become the staple of w hen he sings. Tim Curry, though, can Cbca

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COMING SOON STARTS MARCH 15 EVERYWHERE ntertainment Page 24 March 15,1996

Top 20 Albums of The Week "Fargo': more Courtesy of Discovery Discs, 3417 Spruce St. Reflects the Top 20 album sales for the week of March 11.

No. Album Artist than just a 1. Score F u g e e s 2. Beautiful Girls S o u n d trac k 3. Jagged Little Pill Alanis Morissette 4. Lovelife Lush 5. Boys for Pete Tori A m os cold place 6. Lay It Down C o w b o y Junlcies 7. Relish Joan Osborne 8. Resident Alien S p a c e h o g 9. Leaving Las Vegas Soundtracl< 10. Mellon Collie and the Infinite Sadness Smashing Pumpl«kli^*poo visits the frantic, edge of and the foul-ups multiply. His ^ miA crnnpilM ^Ifimous people, your seat feeling complete and utter breakdown is shoot$pholdsofthetr^iM lsioii0$/i(i

'Birdcage' opens eyes and gets a lot of laughs In th e process

ultra-conservative parents that The old don't-let-the-son's-girlfriend's-folks- they are not gay lovers, but sim­ ply the boy’s fa^er and uncle. know-we're-gay routine, except Mork does it. This movie is funny. It’s that simple. Every situa­ Jason Woerner laugh uncontrollably. tion, every character, every man­ DRAG QUEEN Robin Williams and Nathan nerism, every blatantly obvious “Politically Correct” can be Lane play lovers/parents to joke, every subtle elbow nudge is found nowhere within the shred­ Williams’ son, the result of a hilarious. ded newspapers and parakeet one-night stand/experiment. Drag movies have never really droppings at the bottom of The When he informs them of his been my thing. Priscilla, Queen of Birdcage. intention to marry the daughter the Desert and Too Wong Foo, With its stereotypical treat­ of a politician so right-wing he Thanks for Everything, Julie ment of homosexuality, Mike makes Newt Gingrich look like Newmar were just long titles to Mtfrick Moiton Buena Vista Pictures Nichols’ latest will possibly upset Dennis Miller, wacky antics me. But The Birdcage, although No matter how many times you see the film, you will never see this shot That's as many people as it causes to ensue as they try to convince the SeeBkdrag9onpage23 because It isn't there. Just like that -special" friend you say you have in Canada.