£~~~? out if you're a Priggish Pollyanna or a Full-onFloozie.p14 500 Loven, Suite 200 • Houston, TX77006 Phone: 713-529-8490 • Fax: 713-529-9531 A Window Media Toll Free Out-oj-Stote: 877-966-3342 Publication
PUBLISHER Window Media LLC All content of Eclipse GENERAL MANAGER magazine copyrighted Mike Kitchens ©2003 by Window Media, LLC,and is ADVERTISING SALES protected by federal Brian Martin. Brett Cullum Tom Jones (Classifieds) copyright law and may not be reproduced EDITORIAL DIRECTOR without the written Chris Crain consentof the publisher. The sexual orientation EDITORS of advertisers, Matt Hennie • Mike Fleming photographers, writers WEBMASTER and cartoonistspub- Aram Vartian lished herein is neither inferred nor ART DIRECTOR implied. The appear- Rob Boeger ance of names or PRODUCTION MANAGER pictorial representation John Nail does not necessarily indicate the sexualori- GRAPHIC DESIGNER entation of the person Joey Carolino or persons.
PHOTOGRAPHER Eclipse isfor adults Dalton Dehart only and is published weekly and distributed CONTRIBUTORS free throughout the Jim Buck, Raquel Chevallier, Michael Derry, Deep South. Greg Fox, Glenn Hanson, Woody Miller, Allen Neuwirth, Christopher Seely, Arjan Timmermans, Romeo San Vicento
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Thousands attend 'I don't really mind gay guys bee•• Houston's gay most gay guys are really good-looId business expo Why would I want that for compe1t1DEJId Heavy clouds and rain didn't stop thousands - 'Real World' Paris cast member Ace, from visiting the eighth annual Empower reacting to a event, held Sept. 20-21 at the George R. visit his gay Irish roommate Simon Received from his Brown Convention Center. The Empower Spanish boyfriend, Tkisco 2003 theme, "Go Straight to the Gay Market," gave nearly 150 businesses and city has such an involvement with the gay organizations a chance to reach out to gay business community, whereas other cities constituents. Candidates that seem to have a more open and political advocacy gay community don't have a gay groups, including the chamber of commerce," said Harris County Democratic Jorge Usatorres, sales manager for Party, Log Cabin Of Course! who relocated from Republicans and the Miami. Tow estimates the event Human Rights Campaign, brought in $5,000 from ticket also turned out to visit sales alone. The revenue will help LoneStarVolleyballAssociation with gay voters. ClaytonCatering, Course! fund the organization, which sup- Of The B Division culminated in an AII- Empower is sponsored booth(Photoby DaltonDeHart) ports local gay or gay-friendly Houston final with "Houston Eight is Not each year by the Greater businesses and organizations. Enough" taking the gold and "Houston Houston Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual & Hot Shots" finishing a close second. Kari Transgender Chamber of Commerce. This Houston volleyballers Carlson and Jose Polendo were named to year's event brought in about 3,500 visitors, the tournament all-star team. Back on the according to Coy Tow, the chamber's execu- fare well at gay home front, LSVA served up the fall season tive director. "If we don't support and keep San Antonio tourney with a roaring start. Overall, 17 teams rep- investing in gay businesses, we all lose, " he resenting three divisions have registered for said. A local catering company - dubbed Teams from the Lone Star Volleyball league play. Anger Management are tak- "Clayton Catering, Of Course!" - won first Association recently traveled to the inau- ing the early lead in the Recreational place for its booth, which featured a heaven gural Alamo City Classic Volleyball tourna- Division, and The Golden Boys are nothing and hell theme. "It was great to see that this ment and took the tournament by storm. but gold in the Competitive Division. The Mammers team is in first in the Power Division. child custody and visitation, employee bene- League play takes place on Sundays at the fits, bereavement and family care leave and Jerabeck Center on the University of st. exemption from gift and estate taxes. Partners Thomas campus from 3:30 p.m. to 9:30 p.m. also have the right to make funeral arrange- For more information, log on to wwvv.lsva.org. ments for each other, and they are required to cover each other's debts and to pay alimony Calif. governor signs and child support. landmark unions law Singer Etheridge ties California Gov. Gray Davis signed into law knot for second time Sept. 19 a measure granting gay couples almost exactly the same rights and benefits as The brides both wore white Sept. 20 when les- married couples in the state. The legislation bian rocker Melissa Etheridge, 41, and actress takes effect on Jan. 1, 2005. Tammy Lynn Michaels, 28, held a commitment "We're at our best when we ceremony in California. Of course, since gay respect every member of the marriages are illegal in the California family, no matter state, they didn't exactly where you're from or who you get married. But the love," Davis stated in a news union was just as real to release. Assembly Bill 205, the the couple, according to a California Domestic Partner GrayDavis statement released the Rights & Responsibilities Act, following day. "We're so makes the state the second state after grateful for the blessings '---~----'---' Vermont to provide extensive protections for from our friends and fam- TammyLynnMichaels same-sex couples. Only couples that register ily as we commence our andMelissaEtheridge their partnership with the state are eligible for vows and begin the rest the rights and responsibilities accorded by the of our lives together," the statement says.The law. In 1999, California became the first state ceremony was in Malibu, Calif., near the cou- to allow gays the right to register their part- ple's house adjacent to the home of Julie nerships. More than 22,000 couples are regis- Cypher, Etheridge's ex. Cypher and Etheridge tered to date. Under the new law, partners are share custody of two children and a backyard, eligible for each other's health plans and so that the children can go easily between the expanded benefits for property ownership, two houses.
ecliese I 10-03-03 I 5 New event offers three nights Saturday's Steel party sees the return of fulfill the five applicants' nee s- nd even of partying - for a cause DJ. Sandra Collins at Rich's Houston. She take care of others. "We may act ally recently won the Best DJof 2003 award at increase the number who will be get iA the DancestarAwards among stiff interna- money," he says."We may be able to fully' tional competition. She shows off her sig- fund all requests, and most likely will be nature progressive house, industrial tech- able to fund the next five foundations." The upcoming, first-of-its kind Steel no and trance beat. eekend Oct. 10 -12 arks the birth of a The Grey Party began as a charity event new kind of party at venues around Hungry partiers can head out from Rich's in 1983. The wave of gay color-themed Houston. The event, which issponsored by to the noon to 3 p.m. brunch at 1415 Bar parties around the U.S. spurred the cre- the Grey Party, a non-profit organization, & Grille at 1415 California before going ation of Houston's own, shortly after the is an expanded version of the annual Grey to Numbers for the closing party. The sobering AIDS epidemic struck. "Initially, Party club-goers have come to expect. event, which starts at 5 p.m., features it started because it was too depress- New York DJ. Susan Morabito. ing," Urban says. "So we wanted to do "This is the 21st year the Grey Party has something fun." put on a party," says Tom Urban, Steel Discount advance tickets to all the events Weekend president. "But this is the first can be purchased online at the Steel Party time we've done an entire weekend." Web site, and Hotel Derek, a boutique DETAILS hotel near the Galleria, signed on as the Steel Weekend The lineup features world-class DJs and official hotel of the event. partiers. Steel Weekend kicks off Oct. 10 Oct. 10-12 Organizershope to raisemore than $80,000 ith Iron at M Bar.The party features the www.steelweekend.com anthem and progressive house mixes of DJ for the Grey Party'sfive charities after the Steel from Miami. event's $25,000 overhead cost is deducted. Friday,9 p.m. - 2 a.m. From more than 300 applications, Steel M Bar,402 Main Urban saysopening the party at the spec- Weekend trimmed the list to five benefici- tacular M Bar is the first attempt to make Saturday,9 p.m. - 9 a.m. aries: Lesbian Health Initiative of Houston, the event a mainstream party, but that Rich's,2401 SanJacinto Montrose Clinic HIVTestingProgram, Bering doesn't mean gay people will no longer be Omega Community Services, the LIFE Sunday,5 p.m. - 2 a.m. front-and-center. "We'll expect more Counseling Program of the Montrose Numbers,300 Westheimer straight people at the party, and that's why CounselingCenter and Milam House. we sought out M Bar," Urban says. "We www.richs-houston.com wanted a really diversecrowd there, but we Urban saysthat if the party is as success- 160 pages,$22.95 still want everyone to have a good time." ful as he predicts, the Grey Party would ______~ ~IiJ:tse lO.:D.3.:D;l I Z Photo by David lewis OJ Michael Tank separation between gay men and les- Age: 33 What's your take on the local gay bians. It's time we come back together. Occupation: Disc Jockey at South Beach scene? We did it in the '80s when AIDS was run- Nightclub "Sometimes they don't quite know where ning rampant in our culture, and some- I'm coming from when I'm spinning, and how that unity fell apart. If we don't How long have you been OJing? sometimes it seems like they don't know come together again, the second gay epi- "I have been DJing in clubs for about eight where they want to go with the music. But demic, meth, will destroy the opportuni- years but have kept it as a hobby for over by the end of the night, we all eventually ties we are experiencing of gaining world- 15 years. I used to date a guy when I was find that common ground and leave with wide acceptance." 18 who was a DJ for a local radio station smiles on our faces. in Austin. He used to pass on to me 12 What's in your crystal ball for the local inch records the station could not use and nightlife scene? basically taught me the principles of beat mixing. I started using a cheap Radio "The scene here is going to take on a Shack mixer and two turntables that had "I have not had such a strong con nection new journey. My production team, no pitch control on them, so I had to use with any crows than Houston's. They named Pill Patrol - consisting of John my fingers to control the mix and always always keep coming back for more, and Olavesen, Michael Brown and myself - mixed songs that had the exact same now they thrive to hear what is new and are about to overload South Beach's sys- beats per minute or one BPM off." hot in the music scene. I can't find that tem with a flurry of new remixes of kind of energy anywhere else in the both new and old songs. The great What is it about OJing that keeps you nation right now." thing about it is these remixes will be coming back for more? exclusive to Houston and more precisely "The music. It seems like there are endless If you ruled the gay world, what South Beach. combinations of mixes one can make, and it changes would you make? What would never sounds exactly the same. There is you keep? "I can't reveal the projects we are working always something different you can do with on, but if you hear a new remix of an old a mix - even if you are mixing the same two The first think I would do is knock down song you love while dancing at South Beach, songs together as you did two nights ago." the racial barriers and put a stop to the feel free to come ask me if we did it."
eclipse I 10-03-03 I 9
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Are you a • Whether a Priggish Pollyanna or a Full-on Floozie, we've got a quiz that will settle your score As a way of comforting him, or perhaps con- b. Someone who enjoys fine wine. firming his suspicions, I devised a test for e. "1 Ox5 ue." By Jim Buck Quentin to determine his TQ (Tramp Quotient). Just answer a few simple questions to see When you're out on the town, you usu- ,.close, personal friend - let's call where you fall on the cock-crazy continuum. ally wear: him Quentin - had an unsettling a. Khakis and a chambray shirt. experience on a recent Wednesday Your taste in men tends toward: b. Jeans and a snug-fitting black tee. evening. Like many red-blooded American a. A&F-style preppies. e. A jockstrap and two heaping tablespoons homos, he made a Gay.com midnight b. Daddies with a hint of dissipation. of anal lube. booty call, and after the festivities drew to e. Men with penises. a close and Quentin was getting dressed, On a first date, you'd typically suggest: the other man grinned at him and said, You fantasize about a handsome stranger: a. Coffee and a romantic movie. "Wow, dude, that was way better than last a. Sending you a small, tasteful bouquet of b. Drinks and dancing. time." flowers. e. One hand of five-card-stud, winner bot- b. Sending you a cocktail from across the bar. toms. The problem is, of course, that neither the e. Calling you from a public restroom to veri- man's face nor his other attributes - which fy what he's read. A second date should end with: were considerable - rang any bells for a. A long, passionate kiss. Quentin. He sought me out the next day, sob- When perusing online personals,you look for: b. Fellatio. bing about his unwitting decent into whore- a. Someone who likes long walks on the e. A three-way with that cute guy. You know, dom. beach. the one with the hair?
14 I 10-03-03 I eclie:=.:se"-- ~ ....l Priggish Pollyanna 10 to 15 Dude, what decade are you living in? This isn't some sappy Meg Ryan feel good neverland. The goddamn flying nun gets more ass than you. Find a horny truck- er and set yourself free.
Borderline Betty 16 to 25 You could so totally be a slut, but you were raised better than that. Or you're smart enough to keep it on the down-low. Or you're too shy, nervous or goofy to get as much action as you'd like. Why Your most recent long-term do anything halfway? Chug some relationship lasted: tequila and go for it. a. Eight years, nine months, three your boyfriend is to: days. a. Talk it over like civilized adults Full-on Floozie b. Three years, I think. in the privacy of your own home. 26 to 30 c. How long does it take to gargle? b. Get really hammered and duke You should really spend some it out on the front lawn. time this weekend repainting Moving in with your boy- c. Leave a fake number on the Jett 45s. your bedroom - those foot- friend would require: bevnap. c. Say "no." prints on the ceiling are a. Two or three trips to Ikea. unsightly. You may be ugly as b. Tedious amounts of packing One thing you'd never do to Score yourself one point for every sin, but you're persistent, and and unpacking. an ex-boyfriend is: "a," two points for every "b." that's what counts. Keep it up, c. More nooners than usual. a. Talk about him behind his and three for every "c." Your horndog - but don't be sur- back. total TO corresponds to one of prised if the mayor names a The best way to break up with b. Give back his collection of Joan the following personality types: tunnel after you.
ecli se I 10-03-03 I 15 '"'-1 O)l 34 O~ H G B " years;jj ouston ay ars.com WATCH WEDNESDAYS Domestic Beer & an 15Zf'Special Guest Star owm Single Wen Vodka OFFREY CUELLAR Corona. Heineken 2 Drinks' 4pm-6pm Live! $3wor Shiner Bock !lQ - 9.1Q 7 pm pm FREE POOL Don't Miss This All Great Performance! DAY 15Zf'FreeDrawirl!Wach * Ilpm All TEXAS-SIZED -.~~NIGHT HAPPY HOUR 4PM-8PM ( 0 NT EST 1 1 pm Huge Briar Patch $25 Cash to High Score Winner! Drinks - well single Come see our Flat Screen games! STIll JUST $ 2il!! CHOCOLATE MARTINIS Derrick Silva &. Warren Chase 9~- 11~ JUST $4 50 WOW Houston's New Entertainers KIM YVmE '3 5ZfWatch' MARCYRAE 9~- ll~ w/Special Guest "Sweet Mama Come see these great Stylized ds e Jerry Atwood \.! young performers. you've never heard, She's Cotton" Hear showtunes. NYCHappy Houri Enjoy a quiet evening and Kim and Jerry rock the house on 9~- ll~ country, and even listen to one of Houston's best piano players. Have a drink on our Glass-top Piano or a Glass-top piano. Tuesday nights Packed House! love songs. You name watch the show on one of Ii TVscreens. are action-packed fun! 'See Bar for Details it.Warren plays it and Denick . Glass Top Piano Bar' live Piano Entertainment Every Night Lmlil~'5 HAPPY HOUR HUGE DRINKS
LIVE MUSIC AFTER BRUNCHI Stop by and see the Fabulous Piano entertainers. Fast moving. great sounding action! Bring all your friends for this limited time performer. estheirner Pleasesubmit calendar entries no later than 5p on Monday to make the following week's issue. Faxyour calendar schedule Meteor. Happy hour, 4-8p. 713-521- Cousins. Drag show featuring Raven, O. Courtyard and upstairs bar open at to eclipse magazine, 713-529-9531, or 0123. Sheena, Kara Dion and Diane 3p. 18 and up welcome with $5 e-mail [email protected]. or call Jackson, 11p. cover and ID. 713-523-0213. 713-529-8490. Thefirst listing in the Michael's Outpost. Pool tournament week for each bar includes a phone num- with cash prizes, 8p. 713-520-8446. EJ's.Aateur Strip Night. Rich's. DJ JD Arnold. 21 and up. ber for further information. Call for drink specialsand scheduled Ols. Midtowne Spa. Pool Party. Montrose JR's. 800 Pacific Block Party at Santa South Beach. 800 Pacific Block Party Clinic HIV/STD free testing, 10p-la. Fe Bar & Patio side, 9-9:30p, and 10- with free cover, 10:30-11 p. FRIDAY 003 713-522-2379. 10:30p on JR's side. i Viviana's. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD 611. Free buffet, 5:30p. Male Montrose Mining Co. 800 Pacific free testing. dancers, 9p. 713-526-7070. Block Party, 9:30-1 Op. 713-529- 7488. Briar Patch. Piano sing-a-Iong SUNDAY 5 i on with Warren Chase, 9:30-11 :30p. throats 713-665-9678_ Give those golden 1415 Bar & Grille. Brunch, 11a-3p. T- with karaoke Sundays and Dance with DJ Tucker Dawson, 2p. $2 Cousins. Show featuring Raven, at Guava Lamp_713-52 mimosas. 713-522-7066. Sheena, Kara Dion and Victoria Nicole, 11p. 713-528-9204. 611. $1 brunch, noon- 2p. Rich's. 713-759-9606. EJ's.Montrose Clinic HIV/STD free Briar Patch. Musical Movies with testing, 10p-la. 713-527-9071. South Beach. 800 Pacific Block Party Michael, 4p_ Laurie Gage LIVE, with free cover, 10:30-11 p. 713-529- 6:30p_ Kim Yvette, 9:30-11 :30p. Guava Lamp. Complimentary buffet, SOBE. 5p. 713-524-3359. Keys West. Open dart tournament, Cousins. Show featuring Gena, Sivi, 4p. Piano tunes with Wayne Gray, Victoria Nicole and Dana, 11p. JR's. Hors d'ceuvres, 6p. 800 Pacific 9:30p. Block Party at Santa Fe Bar & Patio SATURDAY 4 Guava Lamp. Karaoke contest, lOp. i ocr side, 9-9:30p, and 10-10:30p on JR's Meteor. Open at 6p. Donna Summer side. 713-521-2519. 611. DJ and male dancers, 9p. CD release party with free CD give- JR's. Karaoke, 6p-2a. aways. Keys West. Pianist Roger Woest, Briar Patch, Piano sing-a-Iong KeysWest. Open dart tournament. 9:30p. 713-571-7870. with Derrick Silva, 9:30p-1 :30a_ Midtowne Spa. Pool Party. 4p.
MeatRack. Bare as You Dare. Club Inergy. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD Montrose Mining Co. 800 Pacific Mary's. Ladies' Night on the patio, 2- Montrose Clinic HIV/STD testing, 10p- free testing, 9p-12a. Block Party, 9:30-10p. 8p.713-527-9669. 2a.713-528-2028.
18 I 10-01-01 I .,diose MeatRack. Cyber Night - 1/2 price with Meteor. Drag Bingo hosted by Southern up, $5 cover. Web site password. Comfort and Lillian Deveroux, with free prizes; benefits local charities. Happy THURSDAY , ocr 9 Meteor. Open at 3p. Decadent Desserts hour, 4-8p. "Queer Eye for the Straight to benefit AssistHers, 4-7p. Happy hour Guy," IIp. Brazos River Bottom (BRB). Live country prices all day until lOp. Frozen grape singing and karaoke with Jody. Montrose popsicles. O. Rewind '80s retro, Happy hour, 3-10p. Clinic HIV/STD free testing, 8p-12a. Courtyard and upstairs bar open at 3p. Michael's Outpost. Pool tournament with Briar Patch. Free pool. Derrick cash prizes, 3p. Silvan and Warren Chase, 9:30p. WEDNESDAY. 8 I ocr O. Tea dance. Courtyard and upstairs bar The crowd at Meteor is always invit- Cousins. Show featuring Raven,Victoria open at 1p. ing at TVand theme nights that make Briar Patch. Geoffrey Cuellar, 7p. Nicole, Kara Dion and Dana, 11p. Montrose Marcy Rae, "Sweet Mama Cotton," Clinic HIV/STDfree testing, 8p-12a. South Beach. Salsa, Bachata and ChaCha for lively mixing and mingling. 713- 9:30p. lessons and demonstrations by 521-0123. EJ's.Roxxanne Collins show with special SalsaEddy, 7p. EJ's.Amateur Strip Night. Montrose guests, 11p. cash prizes, 7p. Clinic HIV/STD free testing, 10p-la. Guava Lamp. Performance by Shaun and MONDAY , ocr 6 O. Bourbon Street Tea Party. Courtyard Guava Lamp. Karaoke contest with cash Kim, 10:30p. and upstairs bar open at 3p. prize. Brazos River Bottom (BRB). Open pool JR's. Star Search Gold Karaoke, 9p. tournament with cash prizes, B:30. 713- JR's.713-521-2519. 528-9192. TUESDAY, ocr 7 KeysWest. Song stylings of Clay Howell, KeysWest. Song stylings of Steve 9:30p. Briar Patch. Free pool. Brazos River Bottom (BRB). Free dance Wheaton, 9:30p. lessons with Rainbow Ranglers, no part- Meteor. Happy hour,4-8p. SinglesNight with Bricks. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD free test- ner needed, 8:30p. Mary's. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD free Lana Blakeand free CDs,9p. YvesSt. Laurent ing, 4-8p. 713-528-8102. testing, 4-8p. fashion show, lOp. Bette Midler CD release Briar Patch. Foxxi Boxxi Contest, party with free CD giveawaysall night. Guava Lamp. Service Industry Night 11 p, with $25 cash prize. Kim Meteor. Happy hour, 4-8p. Total Request (S.l.N.), with half off for service industry Yvette with special guest Jerry Night,9p. Michael's Outpost. Montrose Clinic workers who show a recent paystub to Atwood, 9:30p. HIV/STD free testing, 4-8p. qualify. 713-524-3359. Ripcord. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD free Club Houston. Youth Night, 4p-midnight. testing, 9p-12a. 713-521-2792. O. "0 Boy!" calendar boy contest. Meteor. Mind Mend Mondays. Happy Half price for 18-24 y.o. Montrose Clinic Courtyard and upstairs bar open at 3p. hour, 4-8p. Expert manicures and profes- HIV/STD free testing, 8p-12a. 713-659- Rich's. FUBAR, all Rock & Roll format 18 and up welcome with $5 cover and sional massages. 4998. with DJ Shawn Byrne. ID. No cover for those over 21.
Michael's Outpost. Dart tournament with Guava Lamp. "Queer As Folk," lOp. South Beach. Cafe Con Leche, 18 and Rich's."Hedonism2," with DJJDArnold, 9p.
eelipse I 10-03-03 I 19 I'm a straight woman who is very attracted to homo thugs, but why There are so many gays who live lives do they try to act like they're really into me when what they really want hating 'gay culture' that they're now is get close to me to get the guys I attract? I got a bitch about that! a part of gay culture.
To the people lamenting the absence of rock music in gay clubs: to be your maid, housekeeper and to take a shower or bath before I'm a longtime fan of that kind of house sitter. And now you're adopt- doing it with me, just for courtesy. music, and I can tell you gay people ing a human being. Think man! I You may be hot looking, but your in this town are petrified of any- can be patient with your crap but smell is foul. thing outside their musical comfort wasting a child's future is another zone. At the slightest hint of rock story. You're gay, not Martha! To the guys who are extremely music in a gay establishment, feminine and to the girls who are patrons complain faster than you Man, could the guys in Montrose extremely butch: Can't you all be can say" Janet Jackson." show a little more individualism? normal and get a life? That's not Everybody wears their satin-silk- what being gay is about. Where are the trim black lesbians polyester shirts too freaking tight, who are not afraid to be hot? I am and ohhhh! the denim pants oh-so To the guys who say they won't not at all afraid of wearing black next to the package. Try not to be date someone who's poz: eyeliner, lipstick, lip gloss, silk and too Jack or too Fab 5 because it is Remember, what you're really say- heels; in fact I revel in it. And I am so obvious you do not have your ing is you just won't date the guys not a pushover or a bottom simply own originality. honest enough to tell you! because I am a stylish "femme." Why does the term "stylish lesbian" So what if my lover is in prison I thought the hard part about seem like an oxymoron? for fraud? At least he's serving time finding peace within myself was and is sorry about his crime. Not like coming out. I was wrong because, Hey Mr. Ed (he thinks he's as you, still fugitives of society. as my Mom puts it, "I did not give hung as a horse): I did not become birth to a lesbian." Whenever I your lover for more than three years Hey hot looking guy: You still need brought homosexuality up before I came out, she'd tell me how people are cured of that every day or it was just a communist plot used to corrupt the young. Well, I can't change her opinion.
How can she say that she loves me and then leave when I ask her to work because I get tired of working like a dog everyday, bringing the pay- check home to her.
ToNPR:Why, whenever you mention the pope's spouting off about inclu- siveness, do you never point out his hypocrisy where gays are concerned? If you're looking for sex on the East serving your country, where Net, you might as well say it from the there are no gay bars. Look, chatting is one thing, but if start. Don't pretend to be looking for you want to meet, would you rather "friends," and carryon an intellectu- Gay men should not feel compelled be rejected online or in person? Post al conversation just to entice my to remove their shirts whenever the the pic and save us all some time and interest. You won't get any from me feeling strikes them. awkwardness. just because you are nice and con- stantly complimenting me on my How come no cable network has set If it's not worth it to have an accu- good looks. up a series that features stereotypical rate, recent pic online, why chat up lesbians? Where is the show that fea- someone who does? Wouldn't it To all those queens who feel slight- tures butch girls explaining what's under make a lot more sense, if you don't ed that they're not being cruised at a car hood to Betty Crocker types? Or have a pic, to chat up someone else every bar: Instead of whining about how to repair a toaster or how to spack- who doesn't have a pic? After all, all your insecurities, maybe you should le a wall. It could be called "Diesel 'you want to do is chat, right? be thankful you're not in the Middle Diagrams for the Befuddled Bimbo."
eclipse I 10-03-03 I 21 BRAD... ::t HoP': you OF COUl~5=, ::t. WI5H M'f WE.REN'"T' PUT OF". BY ouR PENIS WASN'T, L.IKE, IN CONVeRSATION WHEN we eVEr~:'f O"T'HER WORD OF "T'He: WERE JOGGING RECEN"T'L.Y. CoNVERSA"T'ION. BU"T' YOU ::t MeAN"T' NO INSUL. T. MADE A GOOD PO/_N_T.._--._ 1"T"6 COOl.., t..ANCE. THERe'S NO REASON FOR Me TO WAIT AROUND FOR VIII/CE.N'ZO.
6E5IDe5_ ..THe~E/S SOME- BODY EL.{iiE ::t ve BEEN THINKIN ABOUT PUR5UIN' ... FOR A WHII..E NOW.
::t: -;rU5T HOPE 'fou DON'T WAIT AROLJN/) ~ NOT WHO FOR 50ME,HING THINK. "T'O HAPPEN WI'TH o -tc»: ,HIS ~OTHE.R PERSON ", BRAD- WH'f NOT?
•• 22 I 10-03-03 I eclipse THEoN ::t M SURE 'Iou AND K)'L..eWIL..L. Be. vS-R'f HAPP'I -rOGs.THER. IT'S NOT I . .. NOT GETTING BOGGED DOWN IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP ~ WITH ONE P~RSON. ~ NEVER PRESUMED M'/ REL.ATION5HIP WITH J"EAN- PIERRE WAS MONOGAMOUS, BRAD. M'i "FREAKING OUT" WAS MORE ABou'7' FIND- ING OUT -:r wA5 SHARING HIM WI'7'H RICHARD, OF AL.1.PEOPLE. :z wANT 50METHIN' O/F- ANo 'THE FACT THAT HE'D FER/i.NT. 50METHIN' WI'TH , BILKED ME OUT OF A StJSS7'ANCE.. SOMETHIN'THATn COUPLEOF THou5AND DOLLARS. L.AS7'. WITH ONS GUY. "f,j eclipse I 10-03-03, (23 YOl1RE REAu.Y /JOT 1ClDD!.~??? A l'I 26 I 10-03·03 I eclipse pop the question at a fancy restaurant. What mystifies me about fag hags is that they actually believe dating gay He does: "How do you want to split men would be a warm, healthy, nur- the bill?" he asks. "You ordered three turing experience. cocktails; I only had one." Imagine the surprise on women's faces You call your new fag boyfriend to see if they could actually date the gay if he can fix the leaky faucet in the men they're hagging on. Here's what sink. He can't. He's having his chest would happen: waxed. Would tomorrow be okay? She'd open the door and the gay guy The preposterousness of straight would have a flower in his hand. He women believing gay men would be opens his mouth, and she knows he's heaven to date reminds me of some- about to tell her how pretty she looks. thing Roseanne Barr once asked of les- bians in her audience: "What do you But he doesn't. The flower droops, his know about hating men? You don't eyebrows narrow, and all she hears is, have to fuck them." "You're not going to wear that to the theater are you?" It's the same thing here. What do Thanks for the compliment, ladies. But straight women know about loving I wouldn't be so quick to idealize us. If He pokes and prods her all the way gay men? They don't have to date us. you want to know what we're really back to the closet where he finds like, don't go to the art museum - go something that won't embarrass him. The truth is, we really are sensitive to a pig farm. and caring to the women we have as . The relationship gains momentum for friends. But to the men we date, we're Need Wood? Ask Woody how to spice up your sex life. E-mail him at months, and she knows he's about to downright Kevorkian. [email protected]. ___ ecli~seI 10·03-03 I 2. eclipse I 10-03-03 I 29 VERY HANDSOME! BODY MAGIC erotic body rubdown. EMPLOYMENT Masculine, Muscular, 32y.o., Montrose In/out. Dan (713) 529-8787 or 5'9", 44"-chest, 31 "-waist, 1751bs. (713) 857-1009. SOUTli BEACH / JR's Bar & Grill/The Montrose Sculpted Physique. MASSAG HOT SCOTT Sensual rubdowns by mus- Mining Company We are looking for honesi seIf- (713) 480-0231. FEEL AWESOME motivated & aJstomer servioe oriented individuals cle stud. In/out. Noon-midnight. 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Provocative videos for those Who the difference betWeim Friday October 3rd Michael Roberts Bpm ~5am Bill Berdeaux Sam - close Saturday October 4th Rob Reum 9pm - Sam Bill Berdeaux Sam - close In the Penthouse George Gr.eenlee 4am until ••• 4, 500 lcvett, Suite 200 • Houston,TX77006 Phone:713-529-8490 • Fax: 713-529-9531 A Window Media Toll FreeOut-of-Stote:877-966-3342 Publication PUBLISHER Window Media LLC All content of Eclipse GENERAL MANAGER magazine copyrighted Mike Kitchens ©2003 by Window Media, LLC,and is ADVERTISING SALES Brian Martin. Brett Cullum protected by federal Tom Jones (Classifieds) copyright law and may not be reproduced EDITORIAL DIRECTOR without the written Chris Crain consentof the publisher. The sexual orientation EDITORS of advertisers, Matt Hennie • Mike Fleming photographers, writers WEBMASTER and cartoonistspub- Aram Vartian lished herein is neither inferred nor ART DIRECTOR implied. The appear- Rob Boeger ance of names or PRODUCTION MANAGER pictorial representation John Nail does not necessarily indicate the sexualori- GRAPHIC DESIGNER entation of the person Joey Carolino or persons. I/HOTOGRAPHER Eclipse isfor adults Dalton Dehart only and is published weekly and distributed CONTRIBUTORS free throughout the Jim Buck, Raquel Chevallier, Michael Derry, Deep South. Greg Fox, Glenn Hanson, Woody Miller, Allen Neuwirth, Christopher Seely, ~ Arjan Timmermans, Romeo San Vicento NATIONAL ADVERTISING REPRESENTATIVE lit Rivendell Media 212-242-6863 Web: _.eclipse-mag.com i E-mail:[email protected] Columbia Records and Meteor invite you to celebrate the release of New Universe the Columbia Records debut album from featuring the hit single "Special" Win CDsamplers! In stores October 7 NEVER A COVER FREE PARKING FREE VALET ON FRI. AND SAT. 2306 Genesee @ Fairview· Houston, TX. 713.521.0123· www.meteorhouston.com Gay icon Tammy Faye ioo-~'~i.J Messner preaches = -§ survival in new book o :z::: Tammy FayeMessner, known for her free- flowing tears and copious mascara, is on tour with a message of survival she wants gay fans to hear. The infamous Praisethe Lord scandal over the "romance" between Messner's then-husband Jim much and survive, and a lot of gays have Burgess, John Carter, John Abney Bakker and ministry assistant JessicaHahn to struggle," Messner says. "I love my gay Culberson, Sam Johnson and Pete could have knocked fans unconditionally, and I think the world Sessions,all Republicans,have all signed on Messner down. And if could use more unconditional love. n as co-sponsors to the amendment. The that wasn't enough, measure currently has 91 co-sponsors in Messner's own bouts with the House of Representatives. A version of depression, addiction to Texas congressmen the proposal is expected to in the Senate prescription drugs and back anti-gay soon. Sen. John Cornyn (R-Texas)sent a cancer should have done "Dear Colleague" letter to fellow senators the trick. But the gay icon amendment on Sept. 17, urging them to brainstorm held her head up, perse- ways to protect the anti- vered and poured her Nine members of Congress from Texas- gay Defense of Marriage the most from any state - have signed on Act of 1996. "He hasn't energy into other projects. One is her new as co-sponsors to a proposed amendment said he would support an book, "I Will Survive and You Will Iool." to the u.s. Constitution mandating mar- amendment to protect tra- which she is currently on tour promoting. riage shall "consist only of the union of a ditional marriage, but he "I want to try and help others," she says. man and a woman." But two Houston- did say marriage is impor- Chapters deal with such topics as divorce, area members of the state's congressional tant enough to protect faith and parenting, as well as "How to delegation, Reps. Chris Bell and Sheila U.SSen. .John with a constitutional Dress Rich on a Budget" and "Wigs and Jackson Lee - both Democrats - have (ornyn (R·Tx.) amendment," said Don Facelifts." "I Will Survive" also deals with said they do not support the anti-gay mar- Stewart, Cornyn's commu- self-esteem, which Messner sayscan be a riage amendment. Reps. Ralph Hall and nications director. Sen. Kay Hutchinson (R- problem for gays. "I think they love me Charles Stenholm, both Democrats, and Texas) did not respond to interview because they have seen me struggle so Reps. Joe Barton, Kevin Brady, Michael requestsby presstime. In order to pass,the 4 I 10·10·03 I eclipse proposed constitutional amendment requires hassle of every day life," Blige says. "Right 292 votes in House of Representatives and 67 now, I am growing, I'm learning .... What votes in the Senate, and must be adopted by you hear on "Love & Live" is the truth and the state legislatures in 38 states. my willingness to embrace it." Queens of Soul spread 'Queer Eye' stars find joy on new albums new agents, 'friend' Aretha Franklin and Mary J. Blige are two of The new salary for the Fab Five on the second America's finest female soul singers. season of Bravo's "Queer Eyefor the Straight Franklin's uplifting classics and Blige's brutal- Guy" is strictly under wraps, but thanks to ly honest crooning capture millions of hearts shunned culture expert Blair Boone's breach- and grant the artists the respective titles of of-contract suit, we do know that the cast Queen of Soul and Queen of Hip Hop Soul. currently makes $3,000 an episode. The team Coincidentally, both released new work last renegotiated its contract to allow for salary month that celebrates the joys of love and hikes beyond the five percent that is written life. Franklin packs her posi- in the current contracts, according to the tive vibe into the album "So Hollywood Reporter. "They got us cheap ... I Damn Happy," and Blige was a nobody who didn't have leverage to goes back to her inner city demand a lot of money," cooking guru Ted roots on her sixth studio Allen told the Philadelphia Enquirer. Now record "Love & Live." The Allen and one of his cohorts have even more two actually join royal forces professional leverage. He and the show's on Franklin's effort, with Mary J. Blige interior designer Thom Filicia signed with the Blige contributing two William Morris Agency for their negotiations, tracks. On "No Matter What" and "Holdin Variety reports. Hunky grooming guy Kyan Out," Blige provides a modern day R&B vibe Douglas doesn't have an agent, but he may that underlines Franklin's unlimited versatili- have a new "friend." Us Weekly saw him ty. Blige, who has gained significant popu- getting cory with Robert Gant, who plays larity among gay listeners with sweeping Ben on "Queer As Folk," at a pre-Emmy party club mixes and her support for AIDS chari- in Los Angeles two weeks ago. The two ties, also succeeds with her own new album. "retired to a quiet corner to chat alone" and "I was tired of suffering, of the hustle and left in a car together, Us reported. eclipse I 10-10-03 I 5 Meteor invites you to celebrate the Want to place DVDrelease of a classified ad in eclipse? ,!': : it .!- The hilarious, laugh-packed comedy about becoming a flight attendant, 1. ' , starring award winning Gwyneth Paltrow and Christina Applegate. , s . , ,. Win DVDs!/ 'I In stores now! -~ NEVER A COVER FREE PARKING FREE VALET ON FRI. AND SAT. PI. '. 2306 Genesee @ Fairview· Housten, TX· 713.521.0123· www.meteorhouston.com ~~ 8~f~y SllO-10-031 ecI_Ipse W Where can you be found in Houston's nightlife scene? "It depends. Some nights I want to party like it's 1999, and others I would rather have a nice dinner and a movie." What are your goals for the future? "Hopefully, going to grad school and getting my MBA." How do you rate the Houston gay scene? "It's a lot better than in other cities, although gay Montreal tops the list!" What's in your crystal ball? "I'm waiting for my 'Wes' ('Boy Meets Boy'). Call me a hopeless romantic." Where do you find the hottest men in Houston? "You never can tell these days. They are where you would least expect them to be. I am still waiting for my Mr. Right." \ "'~•.'.,--=---=------::=---=-=---=-----=------=~---=---=-I Spin one in the' land of 'Oz' OJAlyson Calagna by Arion Timmermans spins on new CD in her singular style I have been hooked ever since. Eclipse: How do you describe your spin- Last month, Centaur Music released the ning style? addition" A Weekend in OZ" to the high- Calagna: House music. All forms of ly acclaimed Party Groove dance series. house - from deep, sexy, sultry house to The CD is the namesake for a Denver progressive and everywhere in between. I event, produced by MBD Productions, am crazy about percussions. Lots of it. all that includes a popular line-up of enter- different types of percussion. This girl tainment and DJs including Warren Gluck loves her tribal. and Alyson Calagna. Eclipse: What is your secret to getting a Miami based DJ/producer Calagna was crowd moving and excited? first exposed to house music as a child in Calagna: Now, if I told you, it wouldn't Alyson Calagna (Photo courtesy Centaur Music) Aberdeen, Scotland. At the age of 16 be a secret anymore. living in Louisiana, Calagna found a nat- ural calling to the turntables, which led Eclipse: How do you prepare for a DJ gig? rest just flows. to her first residency. Currently, she is Calagna: I listen to old and new records, and traveling the country spinning fierce I make sure my CDs are organized. I try and Eclipse: How do you like playing gay cir- tribal beats. play in my room a couple of times a week. cuit parties? Do the gay boys treat you well? Edlpse: How did you get you start as a DJ? Sometimes I find that if lover-prepare, I Calagna: I love playing, period. For all Calagna: Eleven years ago, when I was lose my intuition. So the most important crowds. Making people dance is my pas- dancing at a teen club. My friend was a thing for me is my mental state. If my sion. Circuit parties are a blast. I used to DJ there, and he taught me how to spin. energy is good and my spirits are up, the play at raves, but circuit parties are basi- 1n I In.,n.n,, I _1:__ cally gay raves with a much better produc- Calagna: There are a lot of DJsthat I feel that tion. I can kind of flow with, one of them would be DJ Paolo. He is my tribal husband. I think I love the lights, the shows, the whole extrav- Monty Q and I would have an eclectic story aganza-type feel. The boys are great. They are together. very appreciative of the music. I love that about them. Eclipse: What DJs inspire you? Calagna: Do you have all day? I can name Eclipse: How was it to create the latest Party hundreds. The first inspiration would be the Groove CD? Tunz crew back in Lafayette, La. Danny T. Calagna: It was great! I have worked with because of the deep tribal, JR because of his Centaur before, so it was nice to work with technical skills, Abel because of his Cha Cha them again. The "Weekend in Oz" gang was and Monty because of his versatility. awesome. I was totally stoked about being the DJ to make the CD for Denver's first cir- Eclipse: What music genre would you never cuit party. include in a set? Calagna: In a dance music setting, I really Eclipse: What vibe did you want to convey at don't like trance. I'm not saying it's bad or "Weekend in Oz"? anything. It just doesn't fit in my groove. Calagna: I played the closing tea dance, so the music selection was geared more towards Eclipse: What is the future of club music? vocals. I was still able to throw in my percus- Calagna: I can only say what I hope for: I sion groove on a few of the tracks in hope house gets "housier." Good vocal between, and it turned out great. house with a message or a meaning, not just a remixed pop song. Eclipse: What are some of your favorite tracks? I have played music with an edge ever since I Calagna: I love the tribal tracks the most, of started, so I would like to see music with an course. edge meet classic house. That might sound crazy, but I miss organs and those cute Eclipse: What DJs do you feel most relat- sounds that used to make us move years ago. ed to? I want more sexy soulful tribal music. Put some heat in your What do you get when you mix hot guys, cool drinks and scorchin' music from DJs including winter nights with a spark DJ Roland Belmares and DJ Paulo? You get Gay Days and the "Better Than Wet" party from the circuit that promise to light up the Florida night. By Van Gower Alegria Musica The approach of cold winter nights doesn't mean Oct. 12 the end of the circuit party season, If anything, it's New York City a perfect excusefor throngs of bronzed, buff and www.aleqriaevents.com beautiful guys to cram onto the dance floors and work up some hot and sweaty energy, The Sound Factory is the place where DJs Abel and Eddie Elias work their frenzied Our list of 10 of the hottest circuit parties in sounds for this wildly popular party that's the US and Canada through the end of the pure XXX: x-tra sexy, x-tra studly and x-tra year is designed to give you a heads-up on sweaty, the where the boys are, D.J Barry Harris at Blu When the lights go down at these events, the Oct. 18 volume goes up and the spotlight is on you Atlanta and hundreds of your newest friends, www.bluatlanta.com Gay Days This may not be an official circuit party, but Oct. 10-12 everybody knows the cute young guys in Tampa Bay Atlanta possess more than enough sex and www.qaydaystarnpabaycom sin to make any party a hot and happening Z:2:L IN es 14 I 10-10-03 I eclipse experience. Add Thunderpuss DJ Journey to the land of Voodoo Halloween falls on Friday this year, Miami, Miami Beach and Ft. Barry Harris, and no dance fan and Anne Rice for a scary, sexy so the parties are non-stop. And Lauderdale should miss this event. weekend full of music, drinks and speaking of non-stop, Backstreet www.whiteparty.com lust with hundreds of Big Easy is alive with the living dead, wel- Cherry 9 boys in New Orleans. coming gay ghouls to dance floor One of the most popular circuit Launch Party insanity with the sounds of DJs parties in the world returns Oct. 18-19 Hell Ball 7 Derrick Shaw and Bill Berdeaux. with a who's who of the Washington, D.C. Oct. 25 hottest A-list DJs and more www.cherryfund.org San Francisco .Joe Gauthreaux than enough beautiful men to www'hellball.orq at Blu shake a stick at, so to speak .. Washington isn't all politics and Nov. 8 This is the big one. filibustering. The hard-body cir- This is one of those times when Atlanta cuit partiers are no stranger to they all can be California boys, www.bluatlanta.com Latin Fever the inner Beltway, and there's no and they'll be out in their sexy, Nov. 27-0ec. 3 stopping the energetic beats of costumed best for this annual Gauthreaux has a loyal following, Puerto Vallarta superstar DJs Susan Morabito party that kicks off a week of and he is known for thrilling fans www.willgorges.com and Alyson Calagna when they frighteningly-fun gay Halloween everywhere on the hottest dance set down the sounds that turn up festivities in 'Frisco. floors in the country. He gives The warm temperatures south the heat. Atlanta boys what they crave and of the border get even hotter Primetime at leaves them panting for more at when Puerto Vallarta becomes Halloween 2003 Backstreet this winter stop. the setting for international Oct. 23-26 Nov. 1 DJs and plenty of sweaty men New Orleans Atlanta 19th Annual moving to la musica. And,l' www.halloweenneworleans.com www.backstreetatlanta.com White Party did we mention the Squirt Nov. 23-Dec. 1 Gun Party? E eclipse I 10-10-03 I 15 0)'\ Q~ H G B " years'3-/ ~ ouston ay ars.com WATCH WEDNESDAYS Domestic Beer /!. all 1riSpecial Guest Star $J WOW!R Single Well Vodka GEOF REV CUELLAR Corona, Heineken 1 $2 Drinks' 4pm-6pm Live! or Shiner Bock QQ - glQ 7pm pm JRE~ POOL Don't Miss This ALL Great Performance! DAY 2 ~ FreeDrawi~ Warm * Upm ALL TEXAS-SIZED ~~NIGHT HAPPY HOUR 4PM-8PM ( 0 N T EST 1 1 pm Huge Briar Patch $25 Cash to HighScore Winner! Drinks - well single Come see our Flat Screen games! STILL JUST $ 2lill t CHOCOLATE MARTINIS Derrick Silva 8. Warren Chase g~- ll~m JUST $.4 50 WOW Houston's New Entertainers t KIM YVmE '3 [;21'Watch MARCY RAE g~- ll~ w/Special Guest Jerry Atwood "Sweet Mama Come see these great Stylized a ds e Cotton" young performers. you've never heard, She's Hear showtunes, NYCHappy Houri Enjoy a quiet evening and Kim and Jerry rock the house on 9~-1l~ country, and even listen to one of Houston's best piano player> Have a drink on our Glass-top Piano or a Glass-top piano. Tuesday nights Packed House! love songs. You name watch the show on one of 6 TVscreens, are action-packed fun! 'See Bar for Details it. Warren plays it and Derrick Glass Top Piano Bar' Live Piano Entertainment Every Night FiR[IilM~ HAPPY HOUR HUGE DRINKS UVE MUSIC AFTER BRUNCHI Stop by and see the Fabulous Piano entertainers. Fast moving. great sounding actionl Bring all your friends for this limited time performer. estheimer Please submit calendar entries no later ~ than 5p on Monday to make the following week's issue. Fax your calendar schedule MeatRack. Bare as You Dare. Jackson, 11p. to eclipse magazine, 713-529-9531, or Montrose Clinic HIV/STD testing, 10p- SUNDAY , on 12 e-mail [email protected]. or call 2a. 713-528-2028. EJ's.Amateur Strip Night. 7/3-529-8490. The first listing in the 1415 Bar & Grille. Brunch, 11a-3p. T- week for each bar includes a phone num- Meteor. Happy hour, 4-8p. Shot spe- JR's. 800 Pacific Block Party at Santa Dance with DJTucker Dawson, 2p. $2 ber for further information. Call for drink cials all night. 713-521-0123. Fe Bar & Patio side, 9-9:30p, and 10- mimosas. 713-522-7066. specials and scheduled DJs. 10:30p on JR's side. Michael's Outpost. Pool tournament 611. $1 brunch, noon-2p. FRIDAY, 0 with cash prizes, 8p. 713-520-8446. . KeysWest. Open dart tournament. ocr. ] 4p. Piano tunes with Wayne Gray, . 611. Free buffet, 5:30p. Male Midtowne Spa. Pool Party. Montrose 9:30p. dancers, 9p. 713-526-7070. Clinic HIV/STD free testing, 10p-la. 713-522-2379. Briar Patch. Piano sing-a-long with Warren Chase, 9:30-11 :30p, Montrose Mining Co. 800 Pacific 713-665-9678. Block Party, 9:30-1 Op. 713-529- 7488. Cousins. Show featuring Raven, Sheena, Kara Dion and Victoria Rich's. Varsity night with lirney's Nicole, 11p. 713-528-9204. Varsity contest, 11 p. Virginia Slymm show, midnight. 713-759-9606. EJ's.Montrose Clinic HIV/STD free Midtowne Spa. Pool Party. testing, 10p-la. 713-527-9071. South Beach. 800 Pacific Block Party Briar Patch, Musical Movies with with free cover, 10:30-11 p. 713-529- Montrose Mining Co. 800 Pacific Michael, 4p, Laurie Gage LIVE, Guava Lamp. Complimentary buffet, SOBE. Block Party, 9:30-1 Op. 6:30p, Kim Yvette, 9:30-11 :30p, 5p.713-524-3359. SATURDAY , ocr ]] O. Courtyard and upstairs bar open at Cousins. Show featuring Gena, Sivi, JR's. Hors d'oeuvres, 6p. 800 Pacific 3p. 18 and up welcome with $5 Victoria Nicole and Dana, 11p. Block Party at Santa Fe Bar & Patio 611. DJ and male dancers, 9p. cover and ID. 713-523-0213. side, 9-9:30p, and 10-1 0:30p on JR's Guava Lamp. Karaoke contest, lOp. side. 713-521-2519. Briar Patch. Piano sing-a-long Rich's. Steel Weekend main party with Derrick Silva, 9:30p-1:30a. 'Steel: 9p-9a. 21 and up. JR's. Karaoke, 6p-2a. KeysWest. Pianist Roger Woest, 9:30p. 713-571-7870. Club Inergy. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD South Beach. 800 Pacific Block Party Keys West. Open dart tournament. free testing, 9p-12a. with free cover, 10:30-11 p. 4p. M Bar on Main. Steel Weekend 'Iron' party, 9p-2a. 713-222-1022. Cousins. Drag show featuring Raven, Viviana's. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD Mary's. Ladies' Night on the patio, 2- Sheena, Kara Dion and Diane free testing. 8p.713-527-9669. I 18 I 10-10-03 I eclipse Meteor. Open at 3p. Frozen grape popsi- Michael's Outpost. Dart tournament with MeatRack. 1/2 price all night. testing, 9p-12a. 713-521-2792. cles. cash prizes, 7p. Meteor. Drag Bingo hosted by Southern Rich's. FUBAR, all Rock & Roll format Michael's Outpost. Pool tournament with Midtowne Spa. Half-off room price, 12p- Comfort and Lillian Deveroux, with free with DJ Shawn Byrne. cash prizes, 3p. 12a. prizes; benefits local charities. Happy hour, 4-8p. "Queer Eye for the Straight THURSDAY 00 ]6 Numbers Night Club. Steel Weekend O. Bourbon Street Tea Party. Courtyard Guy," l1p. closing party 'Greysteel,' 5p-2a. 713- and upstairs bar open at 3p. Brazos River Bottom (BRB). Live country 526-6551. Midtowne Spa. Latin Night and half-off singing and karaoke with Jody. Montrose TUESDAY 00. ]4 locker price, 12p-12a. Clinic HIV/STD free testing, 8p-12a. O. Tea dance. Courtyard and upstairs bar open at 1p. Brazos River Bottom (BRB). Free dance WEDNESDAY , 00] 5 Briar Patch. Free pool. Derrick lessons with Rainbow Ranglers, no part- Silvan and Warren Chase, 9:30p. South Beach. Salsa, Bachata and ChaCha ner needed, 8JOp. Briar Patch. Geoffrey Cuellar, 7p. lessons and demonstrations by Marcy Rae, "Sweet Mama Cotton," EJ's.Roxxanne Collins show with special SalsaEddy, 7p. Briar Patch. Foxxi Boxxi Contest, 9:30p. guests, 11p. 11p, with $25 cash prize. Kim MONDAY , 00 ]3 Yvette with special guest Jerry EJ's.Amateur Strip Night. Montrose Guava Lamp. Performance by Shaun and Atwood, 9:30p. Clinic HIV/STD free testing, 1Op-l a. Kim, lOJOp. Brazos River Bottom (BRB). Open pool tournament with cash prizes, 8:30. 713- Club Houston: Youth Night, 4p-midnight. Guava Lamp. Karaoke contest with cash JR's. Star Search Gold Karaoke, 9p. 528-9192. Half price for 18-24 y.o. Montrose Clinic prize. HIV/STD free testing, 8p-12a. 713-659- Meteor. Happy hour, 4-8p. 'Will and Grace: Briar Patch. Free pool. 4998. JR's.713-521-2519. 8 p.m. Singles night with Lana Blake.'View from the Top' promo with giveaways. Bricks. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD free test- KeysWest. Song stylings of Steve ing, 4-8p. 713-528-8102. Wheaton, 9JOp. Michael's Outpost. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD free testing, 4-8p. Guava Lamp. Service Industry Night Mary's. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD free (S.l.N.), with half off for service industry testing,4-8p. O. "0 Boy!" calendar boy contest. workers who show a recent paystub to Courtyard and upstairs bar open at 3p. qualify. 713-524-3359. Meteor. Happy hour, 4-8p. Professional 18 and up welcome with $5 cover and women's happy hour, 6 p.m. Total ID. No cover for those over 21. JR's. "Queer As Folk," 8p. Professional Request Night, 9p. dancer contest, 11p. Rich's."Hedonism2," with DJJDArnold, 9p. O. The 0 Show. Courtyard and upstairs Meteor. Mind Mend Mondays. Happy bar open at 3p. 18 and up welcome with South Beach. 713-529-S0BE. hour, 4-8p. Expert manicures and profes- The men are friendly, the neighborhood $5 cover and ID. sionalmasseqes. is inviting and the ambiance is relaxing Toyz Disco. Montrose Clinic HIV ISTD free at Briar Patch. 713-526-7070. Ripcord. Montrose Clinic HIV/STD free testing, 1Op-l a. eclipse I 10-10-03 I 19 Why is that every time I fall in Gay men should not feel compelled love, my damn ex has to come between me and my new lover? It's to remove their shirts whenever the so wrong. To the guy who asked why gay feeling strikes them. men over 30, whether they're black, white, Puerto Rican or Asian, have to be so possessive and jealous: then complain of being used: Wake What a relief to read the bitch because they care. up! I'm not with you because of from the guy who said, "I will not your looks and great sex. come over, have sex with you, then Actual headline on CNN.com, leave immediately like we don't Sept. 24, from an article about a Why do I have to look like you? know each other." I stopped pick- new anthropological study: "Stone ing up men because most of them Age men dumped fish for meat rel- You might get a better response do exactly that. Thank God for peo- atively quickly." I'm hardly sur- at the club if you were to approach ple like you! Can we meet? prised. Even Stone Age men had me with a little respect. Telling me needs. I'm hot, following me around the You will not come over and have club, grabbing my ass, and grinding sex, you will not leave, yadda, How come no cable network has up behind me are huge turn-offs. yadda yadda, and you will not be set up a series that features stereo- Gay men can be gentlemen, too! ignored. Thank you, Glenn Close! typical lesbians? Where is the show that features butch girls explaining To the guys who look down on Will all those dean-shaven dweebes what's under a car hood to Betty me for being a slut: Funny how you either take an attitude enema Crocker types? Or how to repair a clam up and run away as soon as I before flitting down the street or go toaster or how to spackle a wall. It try to have an intimate relationship. back to waiting tables for the het could be called "Diesel Diagrams If I just have sex and leave, I'm bad wanna-bes? You can't bottom for for the Befuddled Bimbo." for being a slut; but if I want to date everybody at that price, right? you for a month, go on vacation Tothe much older men who seduce with you, hold your hand and kiss To the guys who don't like gay- younger men with your money and you in public, I'm pushing too hard? themed shows because there are no 20 I 10-10-03 I eclipse masculine men: Have you ever stood at the counter for 10 min- and nice; he also was "hot" in the watched "The Real World" on MTV? utes holding some merchandise I restroom making out with me. was obviously interested in buying. If voting for the party that supports Behind the counter stood three To the guys at the gym where I am me 50 percent of the time (the chatty queens, laughing with each an independent trainer: Yes, that Democrats), rather than party that other. I finally stormed out. What Colt-model-Iooking dude I am train- supports me 5 percent of the time (the do I have to do to get you to take ing with is my boyfriend. Jeesh! Stop Republicans), makes me a "homo with my money? hitting on him when we are together. a small mind," then so be it. Have some respect. If you are really interested in your I'm over 40, thank God! I lived oh-so-cute boyfriend, why was it that To all the homosexuals who refuse long enough and "safe" enough to you have that cell phone in your ear to admit a hot young guy like me can get here. I can only hope that the from the time you walked up to the really be bisexual: If I turn down you "twinks" and "pnp" queens live long restaurant and the time your femme-y attitude and shaved bod, enough to say the same. boyfriend paid the check? Your maybe it's because I'm lookin' for a boyfriend was not only handsome real woman. OK? As a black man (who happens to be extremely proud of his heritage) who is most attracted to white males, I am constantly amazed at the racism I encounter from fellow gay males. It's OK to date men but how dare I date a man from another race? Do I have to explain the irony there? Am I the only gay man on the planet who doesn't give a crap about mar- riage? Just wondering. Ata certain clothing store recently, I eclipse I 10-10-03 I 21 BY HANSON! NEUWiRTH "'ArAAN UN~Pe:CTt'DLY FiNPS Hi~ BlSiNG.' -:>roucw BY PAN'S YOUJlJe.ER BROn\GR .•• 22 I 10-10-03 I eclipse \-\mE, PUT '-(OUR aOTHB5 Bl.CK 0"'-- /..A /.A /..A , •• DeAD puppies ••• WJ..lAT~AMA1Te~?({o« RO(T"E:N SCABS OOziNG Ar-REAOY HAV~ A !3t:1-1FRie;'-ID pUS .•. STAR,,; N~ r--:-:-"""\.. OR 'SOMerJ..llt-j'? !;;'THioPiAN BABies .•• UJ..I ••• ~IH~~ WiNTERS I-/AKEiD ••• eclipse I 10-10-03 I 23 r.=~~~~~~~~---~-~---.-~~--of~' (i-Q~5S--I -I.:II-P';T--IiQQ!i~~'H-f -I.k--J$T ~DIDN--'T ~iHl-lJ!~( -~~-Y--ls-.~----,I-Yl-AS---N1--(--'i"--ot-~------TQ.--6tJ~T--1"-11~-';;--AfTgR.-) -~t~~.QC1(\!JG YOI) w~Qr; STJ..I. GOINGTHROV@ WtTtlli AfTeR M'I'$~~~ N 1/1"( ROO,",Al.,l. vlQ~, I il\Q.)GIIT, 'iJ¢, vlMi ~ptJr;c ~T \,QI06 WtTtlJAILAJJf) ~T iMPS YiMT T~ P,OI.O fRoY Yi 24 I 10-10-03 I eclipse HIV? How rude! Southern states have a big problem, and hospitality and politeness are to blame Hey Woody! by Woody Miller I was flipping channels when I saw you on CNN. I was very disappoint- asking it. Not sure I liked it. ed at how well behaved you were in front of the cameras. And thanks for the passive-aggres- sive compliment. You'll have to increase in infections (9 percent). C'- I was half-expecting you to stand up come over and play my favorite a and bitch-slap the interviewer like game: Catch the ax. What happened? First, the South has o you do your readers. Anyway, I only the highest concentration of the o caught the tail end of the interview. Speaking of catching things, the group most likely to be infected: South's got it bad. The capital of African-Americans (they now make For once you were actually saying AIDS is no longer Sodom & up 53 percent of all infections nation- a== something interesting - about Gomorrah; it's Aunt Pittypat's porch. ally). The South also has the highest 1M why the south is the capital of concentration of another group most 1M AIDS. I thought New York and San According to the CDC, the 17-state likely to be infected: poor people. Francisco had that distinction. Southern states from Texas to Z - Hoping for a mud fight Washington, D.C., has more residents But there's something more that living with HIV and AIDS than New amplifies these factors: The southern Dear Hoping: York and San Francisco. It also hasthe culture of politeness and indirectness. Yes, it felt weird to answer a ques- ugly distinction of being the only tion without slandering the person area in the country with a significant One of the most effective ways to 26 I 10·10·03 I eclipse stop the spread of HIV is to know if her, and she'snever asked why they keep your potential sex partner has it. Sexual bringing guys home instead of girls. behavior changes dramatically with that knowledge. It'll either prevent you Six men, a mom, a meal and no men- from having sex with him or severely tion of the obvious. It perfectly cap- limit what risks you're willing to take. tures the paradox of the South: Love, warmth and silence. But unless he volunteers it, the only way to know if your potential sex partner has Unfortunately, silence is the shortest HIV is to ask. And that's a question distance between social grease and Southerners think is too rude for words. spreading disease. My ex-boyfriend was born in pour a bourbon without spilling it on You should always ask for your part- Kentucky, schooled in Louisiana and is a euphemism. ner's HIV status. To maximize the a past resident of Georgia. When he chances that I'll get a straight answer moved from Atlanta to New York he Where a northerner might askwhy you're - and to reassure HIV positive people noticed a vivid difference. so fucking angry, a southerner would say, that you're not going to bolt at hear- "Who licked the red out of your candy?" ing the truth - say something like, "It "Southerners almost never ask or vol- doesn't make a difference to me unteer their HIV status," he said. Sometimes being indirect goes whether you're positive or not, but I'd "New Yorkers won't shut up about it." beyond charm into the absurd. Take still like to know your HIV status." my friend Cooper. Unlike my ex, I do not have the privi- And after that, no matter what the lege of saying I'm from the South, He and his two brothers are gay. Every answer is,stick your hands down his pants. only the honor of saying I live in it. year, they take their boyfriends to And one of the most charming things Alabama and have Christmas dinner Woody is the author of 'Men Are Pigs about living here is that you can't with mom. They've never come out to But We Love Bacon.' Email him at [email protected]. eclipse I 10· 10·03 I 27 calls. 24 hrs-? week. Travels the United States. EMPLOYMENT ESCORTS Se habla esparol Rico (713) 521·0129. Two Hands or Four? Energy work (like SOUTH BEACH IJR's Bar & GriliiThe Montrose TONY-MONTROSE AREA.ln/Out. Versatile. MASSAG bodyelectric.org) andlor leather? 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