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Eastern Illinois University The Keep

January 2004

1-23-2004 Daily Eastern News: January 23, 2004 Eastern Illinois University

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◆ 2B Page Breaking ground for better water Work on treatment plant well underway By Jessica Youngs because the old plant was very CITY EDITOR aged and outdated. The new plant will use up-to-date technology to The quest for crystal clear, purify city water, while additional- great-tasting water moved one step ly incorporating ozone treatment closer Dec. 8, when the city of during the treatment process, he Charleston broke ground on a new said. DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY STEPHEN HAAS water treatment plant. The decision to build a new treat- The plant, scheduled to be com- ment plant at the old plant site on pleted within a year and a half, is a the east end of McKinley Avenue Representin’ major project for the city’s Public was proposed at the annual city Works Department in accordance retreat attended by department U.S. Rep. Tim Johnson, R-Urbana, speaks with University President Lou Hencken Thursday afternoon in the with its current 5-year plan. directors along with the city coun- Java Bean and Bakery of the Martin Luther King, Jr. University Union. “We do this regularly,” Johnson said. “To visit folks in the community and to find out about Eastern and its needs.” Hencken said Johnson has Department director Curt cil, city manager and mayor. helped (Eastern) open doors in Washington. Buescher said a new plant was scheduled into the 2003-2004 plan SEE WATER ◆ Page 7A

ENTERTAINMENT Not just for children anymore Cartoon producers are finding a new, older audience

By Adam Testa because people at the network had seen them and STAFF WRITER thought they might attract more viewers. “There is a history that if you have a Who says cartoons are just good show with good writing that for kids? you will attract a good view- Jim Babcock, director of ing audience,” Babcock public relations for Cartoon said. Network, said cartoons have The network also actually been targeting an decided to include adult audience for a long Japanese animation, bet- time. He said “Looney Toons” ter known as anime, on its was created with a general Adult Swim programming audience of adults and children block. in mind. Shows like “The Several anime shows, Flintstones” soon followed the including “InuYasha,” same suit. “Cowboy Bebop” and “Big O,” Babcock said from the day attract large viewing audiences. Cartoon Network launched, its So what keeps adults, especial- directors knew they had a signifi- ly college students, watching these cant amount of adult viewers and shows? wanted to accommodate them. Michael Migler, a sophomore “We wanted to build some block of computer information systems our programming for our adult view- major, said he likes the unpredictabil- ers,” Babcock said. ity of the shows. After seven or eight years of building a DAILY EASTERN NEWS “I love how the shows can be so ran- significant base of young viewers, the net- ILLUSTRATION dom,” Migler said. “And you never truly work turned its attention to creating a pro- BY MATT WILLS know what is going to happen next.” gramming block aimed for an audience of 18 Migler said he has watched “Space to 34-year-olds, Babcock said. The result was Ghost Coast to Coast” since its inception on the creation of the three-hour block of program- Cartoon Network in 1994, and he also has been ming now known as Adult Swim. a fan of “SeaLab 2021” for a long time. “We carve out a portion of our time block for “I just like the way that they took old shows and shows for adults and not for varied audiences,” gave them a new twist,” Migler said. “The old shows Babcock said. were good, but the new spins are just awesome.” Babcock said the most popular shows from the Adult programming and In addition to the increasing interest in adult-orient- Swim block are a mixture of Cartoon Network original are among the highest rated, he said. ed cartoons, people also are turning to another kind of programming and shows that originated on other net- “Futurama” and “Family Guy,” both of which origi- cartoon: the retro cartoon, or cartoons from their child- works. nated on the FOX network, have become two of the top- hood and the years beyond. “Aqua Teen Hunger Force,” “SeaLab 2021” and rated Cartoon Network programs. Babcock said the “Harvey Birdman: Attorney at Law,” are all original network decided to purchase the rights to these shows SEE CARTOONS ◆ Page 6A Today Saturday Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Partly cloudy Partly cloudy Rain/Snow Showers Snow showers Partly cloudy Snow shower

Friday, 35º 30º 40º 37º 41º 32º 45º 24º 38º 19º 30º 20º 32º 21º January 23, 2004 HIGH LOW HIGH LOW HIGH LOW HIGH LOW HIGH LOW HIGH LOW HIGH LOW New finance classes approved

By Jennifer Peryam STAFF WRITER

The Council for Academic Affairs approved new and revised finance and accounting courses as well as the Career and Organizational Studies Program revisions effective for Fall 2004. The council approved FIN 3300, Fundamentals of Financial and Tax Planning; 4220, Applied Securities Analysis, and; FIN 4300, Retirement and Estate Planning to prepare students to take the Certified Financial Planning examination. “The CFP is required for all accounting students and these classes will allow the finance major revision to occur,” said Jane Wayland, associate chair of the school of business. Fundamentals of Financial and Tax Planning is an introductory course to finan- cial and tax planning processes. Students DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY COLIN MCAULIFFE must take Business Financial Management, Jane Wayland, associate chair of the Lumpkin School of Business, writes down notes as Larry Helsel, a member of the Council for Academic BUS 3710, before enrolling in FIN 3300. Affairs, Thursday afternoon in room 4440 of Booth Library. Fundamentals of Financial and Tax Planning is an integration of investment systems concepts, design and information Accelerated Learning and Training, COS 1970s,” Woodley said. and portfolio management descriptions, needs. 4890, is a research-based class applying Council members agreed this revision according to the catalog description. “ACC 3900 will allow students to under- accelerated learning courses to accelerate was similar to the Board of Trustees revision Students will give oral classroom and writ- stand the role of accounting during the learning and training. approved last year. The BOT was an alterna- ten reports and conduct a major research industrial age,” Wayland said. Career and Organization Studies Program tive adult education program that was project. Students are advised to take ACC 3250 and revision was also passed. approved. The alternative allows adult stu- “FIN 4220 allows instructors to make deci- ACC 3900 as well. This class will replace “The proposal is to waive the foreign lan- dents to be waived from foreign language sions on how to conduct the class and the ACC 3100, Accounting Information Systems. guage requirement for the adult students in requirements. class uses real money to perform security The course will not be offered until spring our program because it is difficult for them “Our students at Eastern are required to analysis tasks,” Wayland said. 2004, Wayland said. to meet this requirement,” said Deborah meet core requirements and go through a The prerequisites of this course are FIN Productive Work Teams, COS 4880, will Woodley, professor of the school of technol- rigorous program,” said Deb Reid, assistant 3720, Investments and FIN 3730, Financial emphasize what it takes to work as a team by ogy. history department professor. Markets: Commodities, Derivatives and being a member of class teams and studying Eastern does not accept the 1000-2000 Some council members were concerned Securities. Instructors evaluate student per- teams. level foreign language courses taken from other departments would eventually come to formance through students meeting each “This class is to allow students to under- adult community college transfer students. the council asking for foreign language course’s learning objectives. FIN 4300 also stand ways to understand synergy within “The rationale in not requiring these waivers. Council members came to agree was approved. these teams, which can apply in other inter- adults to make this foreign language this program is a non-traditional program New and revised accounting courses also personal instances,” said Thomas Hawkins, requirement apply to their curriculum for career development. were approved. Accounting Information assistant professor of the school of technolo- because it is difficult for them to learn and “These students are working adults who Systems, ACC 3900, will study accounting gy. was not part of the curriculum back in the work full-time,” Woodley said.

CORRECTIONS Brrr ... a weekend for movies and popcorn A story in Thursday’s edition of The Daily Eastern News What’s up Eastern? It has gotten WHAT’S reported the Alumni pretty cold out the past couple of ◆ Tonight from 9:30 p.m.-12:30 HAPPENIN’ ◆ Sunday from 3-7 p.m. The Association’s work with tele- days and with that wind whipping at a.m., University Board Special Campaign for Better Health Care, marketing firm Ruffalo Cody. It my face, I have wanted to just stay Events will host Cosmic Bowling in a not-for-profit charitable organiza- should have reported the Office Brittany Robson in bed all day. Now that the week- the Martin Luther King Jr. tion will be holding a fundraiser at of Alumni Services’ involve- ACTIVITIES EDITOR end is approaching, I’ll have the University Union’s bowling alley. Roc’s Blackfront. Roc’s is located at ment. The Alumni Association is opportunity to do that or take Graduate Student Margie Tucker Admission is $3 before 11 p.m. 410 Sixth Street north of The not involved. advantage of any other indoor said prizes include dvd’s, cd’s, Wal- and $4 thereafter. Square. “Chili Jam” is an event activities. Mart gift cards and other prizes. Mikell said university police will offering all-you-can-eat chili with The column in the same issue ◆ The movies “Butterfly Effect” There also is free shoe rental. be present and everyone who $10 donations and $5 for kids. There misspelled psychology instruc- with Amy Smart and Ashton enters will have to go through a will be a raffle, silent auction and tor Marjorie Hanft-Martone’s Kutcher and “Win a Date with Tad ◆ Want to do some dancing this metal detector. bake sale. name. The quote by Hanft- Hamilton” with Kate Bosworth, weekend? The Black Student Union “It’s just a precautionary thing,” Martone should have read Topher Grace and Josh Duhamel is sponsoring the first dance of the Mikell said. “Some other incidences ◆ Starting Sunday through “desirable work” instead of premiere today. Check out some semester. have happened at other schools and March 10, the African American “desirable worth.” Also, both other events happening this week- “This dance is just to kick off the we just want to make sure nothing Studies Program and the Tarble graduate and undergraduate end. new semester,” said Taisha Mikell, happens here.” Arts Center will present a photo- students are placed in intern- graduate advisor of the Student graphic exhibition focusing on the ships working with or observing ◆ For those 21 and over with no Life Office. ◆ Looking for a good cheap history of African Americans in individuals with serious mental plans yet, The Rural Kings are play- D.J. Tony Muse will supply the movie to watch? University Board Coles County. Display cases are on disorders. ing at Friends and Company music. “He has been at Eastern presents “Matchstick Men” at 5 and the ground floor in Old Main. For tonight. Country livin’ has never before and he did a good job,” 8 p.m. Saturday in Buzzard more information, contact Dr. In Thursday’s Health and been so good. Mikell said. Auditorium. Onaiwu W. Ogbomo. Fitness Guide, Traci Frieling was given the title of dietitian. She is a nutrition education Editor in chief ...... John Chambers Sports editor ...... Matthew Stevens PHONE:217-581-2812 (fax 581-2923) coordinator...... [email protected] ...... [email protected] EMAIL:[email protected] Managing editor ...... Matt Meinheit Associate Sports editor ...... Mike Gilbert ...... [email protected] ...... [email protected] NIGHT STAFF: People looking for help to News editor ...... Matt Williams Verge editor ...... Dan Valenziano Night editor ...... Matt Meinheit secure their computers from ...... [email protected] ...... [email protected] News Design ...... Matt Williams the Microsoft e-mail hoax Associate news editor ...... Carly Mullady Associate Verge editor . . . .Holly Henschen ...... Julie Bourque should contact the help desk at ...... [email protected] ...... [email protected] Sports Design ...... John Chambers 581-HELP. The Daily Eastern News is produced by the Editorial page editor . . . .Jennifer Chiariello Online editor ...... Matt Wills Night Photo editor ...... Stephen Haas students of Eastern Illinois University. It is ...... [email protected] ...... [email protected] Copy editors ...... Ben Erwin SUGGESTIONS published daily Monday through Friday, In Activities editor ...... Brittany Robson Associate online editor . . . . .Stephen Haas ...... Bri Kennedy Charleston, Ill. during fall and spring ...... Peaches51085@hotmail Accounts manager ...... Kyle Perry Night News editor ...... 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Student gov. editor ...... Brian O’Malley Asst. business manager . . .Lindsay Moffett Eastern Illinois University ...... [email protected] Student business manager . . . .Marie Rehr Charleston, IL 61920 Senior reporter ...... Tim Martin Editorial adviser ...... John Ryan ATTENTION POSTMASTER: ...... [email protected] ...... [email protected] Send address changes to Photo editors ...... Colin McAuliffe Publisher ...... John David Reed The Daily Eastern News ...... [email protected] ...... [email protected] Buzzard Hall, Eastern Illinois University ...... Stephen Haas Press supervisor ...... Johnny Bough Charleston, IL 61920 ...... [email protected] Friday, January 23, 2004 THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS 3A Students urged to hit the polls

By Blake Boldt STAFF WRITER

With the election season nearing, Eastern stu- dents are being motivated to make their presence known in the political world. State, city and campus leaders are all urging young people to vote. The consensus among these leaders is that voting is a vital action demonstrating a concern for the community. Richard A. Wandling, political science professor, said education is an important factor in the voter turnout. It is not enough just to help students register, they must also be familiarized with the process, Wandling said. “Students do have a stake in political systems, local, state and federal,” he added. He said this year’s registration drive is essential to influencing students to become engaged in the political landscape. The registration drive will take place during the next three weeks across campus. Registration forms will be passed out and young DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY STEPHEN HAAS voters will be encouraged to vote in the upcoming elections. Students are asked to bring their driver’s The doors to the University Ballroom in the Martin Luther King, Jr. University Union taped and roped off earlier this week because license or a state ID when registering. of construction. Work is being done to completely renovate the ballroom, which will finish at the end of April. The leader of this project is Student Executive Vice President Bill Davidson. He said any number of causes can stir the thoughts of this generation. Ballroom out of service until April The key is to not only get the students registered, but to convince them to vote and become interested in issues that are potentially important to them, By Evan Hill have only recently begun and are Nantz said the renovation project Davidson said. CAMPUS EDITOR expected to conclude in April of this includes: a new ceiling, new drapes for He said the current tuition issue is one bound to year. all windows, new entrance doors, new interest students, but they must be informed on The Martin Luther King Jr. The cost of the renovation is esti- lighting, new wall treatment on the other issues affecting them in the future. University Union University Ballroom mated at $237,580, Nantz said. The north wall and cleaning for all air con- “We also have plans for this project at University will be receiving a makeover during funding will come from student fees ditioning duct work. of Illinois, Western Illinois University, Illinois the next several months. just as any other Union projects have Nantz said so far the only renova- State University and other state universities,” Jim Nantz, business manager for in the past. tions include the old ceiling being Davidson said. Eastern’s Office of Facilities Planning The renovations to the ballroom removed and the area above it being He said registering students is one thing, but for and Management, said the renovations include many aesthetic improvements. cleaned. students to be effective they must visit polling sta- tions. Illinois Senator Dale Righter is another proponent CAA of persuading students to become active in politics. “The 18 to 24-year-old age group has the lowest percentage of any other age group,” Righter said. Overview of budget to be presented He said it is easier to access information today than at any other time. He said this should impact the voter turnout By Kevin Sampier Action Team. because students have a greater chance to be ADMINISTRATION EDITOR “It’s basically just giving The team will talk about an annual informed on politicians and issues. trip to Springfield and share informa- He also believes the younger generation has more The Council on University Planning people an update of where tion with legislators about Eastern, at stake in regard to new laws than any other group. and Budget will get an update on we are in that process.” Nilsen said. Beth Cotter, a freshman elementary education Eastern’s budget Friday from Director “During the course of the day, we set major, has voted in the past and plans to vote again. of Budgets Jim Shonkwiler. —Jim Shonkwiler, director of budgets up posters in the halls of the capitol,” Her feelings on voting, however, are mixed. The presentation will cover the budg- Nilsen said. “The (Eastern) jazz band “I like telling people that I voted, but I don’t think ets for fiscal years 2004-2006 and infor- plays over the lunch hour and we visit that my votes matter much,” Cotter said. mation on Eastern’s planning cycle. legislators in their office.” Another freshman elementary education major, “It’s basically just giving people an The IBHE has sent Eastern a “discus- The trip will be held Feb. 19, she said. Susan Stamm, has never voted before but plans to update of where we are in that process,” sion budget” that outlines some pro- The council also will hear a presenta- vote in the next election. Shonkwiler said of the presentation. posed funds for the 2005 fiscal year. tion from Gail Richard, chair of com- “I haven’t really done any research on the candi- “The state economy hasn’t rebounded Shonkwiler said Eastern has the oppor- munication disorders and sciences. dates and should be more aware of different views,” as expected,” an issue that will also be tunity to lobby for more funds if neces- Council member Chris McCormick Stamm said. discussed, he said. sary. said Richard will discuss a report on the The overall message being sent by politicians and Shonkwiler said the Illinois Board of “These are talking papers more than Athletic Task Force. other public figures is that knowledge of the issues Higher Education last year asked anything,” he said. The Council on University Planning will lead to a better government. Eastern not to spend two percent of its The council also will hear a presenta- and Budget will meet at 3 p.m. Friday in “(The students) have an inherent right to take budget because of the state’s economic tion from Jill Nilsen, vice president for the Arcola/Tuscola Room of the Martin part in the formation of the government,” Righter condition. external relations, on the Legislative Luther King Jr. University Union. said.

BUCKY SAYS: University ADVERTISING IN THE DEN University COSMICCOSMIC CLASSIFIEDS IS GOOD FOR BUSINESS. UnionUnion BowlingBowling PLACE YOUR AD TODAY! 581-2812 Are you looking to make a change? Apply for a chance to participate in Bowling EIU’s multicultural educational trip to Lanes Friday & AtlantaAtlanta Student Government is Promoting Saturday Night Diversity through Education

- Applications available in Student Life Office 9:30-p.m. - 12:30 a.m. MLK Union 3rd floor or call 581-3829 - Tour MLK Memorial Center and host panel discussion Phone 581-7457 with Clark Atlanta University Students DEADLINE FOR APPLICATIONS WED. 1-28 4A EDITORIAL / OPINION PAGE ◆ THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS Friday, January 23, 2004 OPINION Media censoring commercials “Tell the truth and don’t be afraid.” For the past 20 years an “In a totalitarian deficit?” unprecedented situation has That’s correct it will be chil- Editorial board developed with grave implica- system, you are not dren of the next generation and John Chambers, Editor in chief tions for freedom and democracy: some of our children. CBS reject- the emergence of a global com- allowed to talk back to ed the commercial saying that it Matt Meinheit, Managing editor munications cartel. would violate the network’s policy Matt Williams, News editor Our television, newspapers, the government; in the against accepting advocacy magazines, video, photographic advertising. Carly Mullady, Associate news editor images that tell humanity’s story capitalist system, you However, the White House paid Jennifer Chiariello, Editorial page editor Colin McAuliffe are controlled by an ever shrink- between $1.5 and $3 million to ing number of transitional corpo- can not talk back to the show a few commercials on their , Sports editor Photo editor and Matthew Stevens rations. National Drug Control Policy. guest columnist Giants among giants, mega- sponsor.” Insert sarcastic laughter here corps like AOL Time Warner, for Bush’s drug control policy. [email protected] for The Daily Eastern News Disney, News Corporations, NBC, CBS, MTV, CBS in Canada, No, really it’s a good one. Viacom, Sony Bertelsmann and RTL in Germany, TV5 in France. The White House ads will be General Electric, now control “It really wouldn’t be in our inter- similar to previous ads CBS does EDITORIAL McAuliffe also is a senior history over half of all the news and est to do that,” said Chris not seem to think cross the advo- major entertainment flows around the Hitchins, Oracle Airtime Sales in cacy line. planet. South Africa. Timothy Kerr of He can be reached at Information, the lifeblood of In a totalitarian system, you are MediaChannel.Org reported “CBS Keep colinsarcasm@hotmail. democracy, is systematically not allowed to talk back to the would not reveal the content of com commercialized, trivialized, government; in the capitalist sys- the upcoming ads; previous White homogenized, politicized. tem, you can not talk back to the House Super Bowl spots drew a We are running on systemati- sponsor. controversial link between casual attendance cally distorted information. The Some of you may remember drug use and the financing of dream is turning into a night- hearing about a Web site, global terrorists.” mare. MoveOn.org, that wanted to have LA Weekly media critic Judith In September 2003, Adbusters, a videos created that depicted Miller said “their message plays on the rise a mental environment journal, President Bush and his policies. well into Bush’s anti-terror cam- entered into serious negotiations Michael Stipe, Moby, Jack paign because it keeps ordinary with Fox Broadcast Corporation Black, Michael Moore, Russell citizens under siege and the war Fact: Eastern has a 5,300 seat arena. to buy 15, 30 and 60 seconds of Simmons and many more selected on terror central in their minds.” Fact: Since being a Division I basketball airtime, a freedom that any burg- a video as the winner to be a com- Martin Franks, the executive school in 1981 it has never been filled to capaci- er, beer, shampoo, or SUV compa- mercial and played during the vice president of CBS, would not ny can do in America, the land of Super Bowl, when an estimated comment to Media Channel about ty. the free. 100 million viewers will tune in. previous White House Super Since 1994, average attendance for men’s The plan for the commercials With advertisements for beer, Bowl ads that showed similarities basketball games in Lantz Arena has been was their “Buy Nothing Day” credit cards and Viagra, viewers between the war on drugs and the campaign which occurs every unfortunately will not be able to war on terror. 2,068, less than half of the arena’s capacity. year the day after Thanksgiving, view the winner. Last Thursday, So as you watch your bikini and It’s true that attendance in recent years has or the busiest shopping day of the CBS rejected MoveOn.org’s hopes beer commercials and tasty food begun to pick up again with the emergence of year. Adbusters was denied at to buy airtime for the commercial commercials just remember that Fox. during the Super Bowl. you have been censored from former talent Kyle Hill and Henry Domercant, “You might understand, for a The commercial was moving, commercials CBS does not want but the fear is the gate number will be low for broadcast TV network things like powerful and to the point. It you to see. the final five home boycotting television and anti- showed children, no more than 7 It makes you think what else At issue consumerism might not go over or 8 years old, working in facto- does CBS not want me to know games for the 2003-2004 very well with our other advertis- ries, in grocery stores and as about? What other commercials season. Attendance for ers,” said Tim Souris of the garbage collectors. are they refusing to show on the It’s true that selling basketball games at broadcast standards department. Then, the commercial asked air? A bigger question would be Lantz Arena is not Adbusters were rejected every- “Guess who’s going to pay off what are they censoring out of Charleston along with always what it should where they tried to buy airtime, President Bush’s $1 trillion their news? mid-major Eastern to be. big name schools with Our stance tradition-filled pro- Lantz has potential grams is unlikely but to be one of the not impossible. loudest arenas in the OVC or even of any The one Big Ten mid-major in the school willing to come country. to Lantz Arena is Wisconsin and the Badgers drew a crowd of Cartoon by Rita Reinhardt 4,793, 90 percent of the arena’s capacity. In the last three years, the only occasion more than 5,000 have witnessed a Panther bas- ketball game is at the annual Austin Peay matchup. Lantz Arena has the potential of being one of the loudest arenas, if not in the OVC, but of any mid-major in the country. How can we prove this? Every year, Eastern is flooded with fans and Lantz is standing room only for the Illinois State High School Super-Sectional Basketball final. YOUR TURN: LETTERS TO THE EDITOR Dave Kidwell, assistant athletic director and sports information director, has instituted a revival of “The Blue Crew,” but the Recognized Student Organization has low attendance at Apply the celebrated dream most games. After attending the Martin reality check she’ll live with need to concentrate on and others like him died for. I At Gonzaga University the 15th-ranked Luther King Jr. remem- for the rest of her life. After strengthening the communi- think that as members of the Bulldogs draw capacity of 4,000 people for over brance celebration I think having numerous problems ty that already exists here! Eastern community we need how far have we really with her roommate's racial As students attending the to take action against what two years at their arena. come? I thought that as a slurs not only to her but from same school, we are all a happened to the woman The Butler Bulldogs have built a tradition black woman on a college others living in her hall, her community, and as such with- because it will continue to behind the legendary Hinkel Fieldhouse (yes, campus that, yes, we had roommate took this act of out communication we can happen if the situation, isn’t come along way because I hate over the top. Right go nowhere. We have to handled the right way. Who the same building in “Hoosiers”). The 11,053- know that if I had been alive before her roommate moved show our community that we will be next, maybe you? If seat building is one of those places college bas- 40 years ago, I would not her final bit of furniture out do not tolerate one of its we are not going to do any- ketball players say they have to go before they have been permitted to of the room, she wrote on the members to be treated like thing about this situation let’s attend college. walls racially negative things this because what affects one not even acknowledge Dr. die. Unfortunately, last week I about black people and other affects all. If we don’t King’s birthday because Lantz Arena could be that place and Eastern was smacked into a reality derogatories. Should this be attempt to do anything about we’re definitely not living the could be a team like that but it all starts with that, no, we have not yet tolerated? Absolutely not! what happened and then edu- “dream” he gave his life for. overcome! A bi-racial female This is 2004, yet the same cate those who wronged the having a capacity to make home games the student was verbally belit- things that our parents and woman, then we are ignoring Kristin Morrow most dangerous environment for a visiting tled and degraded by her grandparents marched for is all the things that Dr. King sophomore biology major team to visit. white roommate. still happening. If we are The woman, being of silent and nothing is done, LETTERS TO THE EDITOR: The Daily Eastern News accepts letters to the editor But when a team’s losing, it needs fan sup- Lithuanian and Nigerian our children will have to addressing local, state, national and international issues. They should be less than 250 words and include the authors’ name, telephone number and address. Students should port the most. Show school spirit and let Lantz descent, knows nothing but endure the same. I ask you, indicate their year in school and major. Faculty, administration and staff should indicate live up to its potential. embracing and celebrating when will this cycle be bro- their position and department. Letters whose authors cannot be verified will not be diversity. ken? As Eastern attempts to printed. Depending on space constraints, we may edit letters, so keep it concise. The editorial is the majority opinion of the Last week she was given a become more diverse we Letters can be sent to The Daily Eastern News at 1811 Buzzard Hall, Charleston IL Daily Eastern News editorial board. 61920; faxed to 217-581-2923; or e-mailed to [email protected]. Friday, January 23, 2004 THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS 5A

APPORTIONMENT BOARD Senate receives money for secretary’s salary

By Brian O’Malley STUDENT GOVERNMENT EDITOR

The Apportionment Board allocated $400 with an 8-0 vote to pay the Student Senate secre- “The work is extra tary $100 a month for the rest of the semester. unglamorous and, Christine Ruhaak is the cur- rent secretary and is now the quite frankly, boring.” first Student Senate secretary to be paid at Eastern. —George Lesica, Student Senate “The secretary should be com- Speaker pensated for her work,” said Student Senate Speaker George Lesica. “It’s hard to find a per- son who is not only qualified, but also understands the issues and has enough patience to do the job.” resume`. I was a secretary for Lesica said the secretary’s job Student Senate,” Lesica said. is to record minutes for the “It’s not an honorary thing, it’s a weekly senate meetings and job.” record attendance. Larry Ward, student vice pres- “The secretary needs to be ident for financial affairs and someone who is willing to sit AB chair, said the secretary will there and look at a piece of be paid for a trial period to see paper for two hours and take if the system works. notes,” Lesica said. “We’ll see how it works,” Ward Lesica was a secretary for the said. “She should get paid for senate for four semesters after her work.” failing to make an official senate Lesica said additional duties seat. will be given to the secretary “I started out as a secretary now that she is getting paid. for senate,” Lesica said. “The “She’ll assume other duties work is extra unglamorous and, and responsibilities as seen by quite frankly, boring.” (me),” Lesica said. Lesica said the money came Ruhaak has only been secre- out of an awards and bonds tary since the senate’s meeting account and moved to payroll. on Jan. 14 and won’t be paid until The awards and bonds account the next pay period. still has money inside for other “She’s been doing a fine job DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY STEPHEN HAAS reasons. for not being paid,” Lesica said. Lesica said the secretary is The Apportionment Board Wired not a senate seat, but it is a job meets at 7 p.m. on Thursday in and the person in the position the Arcola/Tuscola Room of the Dave Peterson, a carpenter for the university, removes ceiling tiles from the first floor of the Martin should be paid. Martin Luther King Jr. Luther King, Jr. University Union Thursday afternoon. Peterson and other workers were installing hard- “It’s harder to put on your University Union. ware and connections for wireless internet points above the ceiling tiles.

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ADVERTISE IN THE DEN 6A THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS Friday, January 23, 2004

RESIDENCE HALL ASSOCIATION Spots still Making a run for the border available for Deadline approaching for Foreign Language Department trip

Atlanta trip By Matt Rennels STAFF WRITER By Brian O’Malley STUDENT GOVERNMENT EDITOR Time is running out to sign up for the Foreign Language Department’s trip to Mexico. The deadline An executive from the Student Senate spoke to the is Monday, Jan. 26. Residence Hall Association Thursday about the appli- The department has been organizing the annual trip cation process for the trip to Atlanta from Feb. 12-15. for 26 years, and this will be the second year Spanish Lisa Flam, student vice president for student professor Carlos Amaya has taken part. affairs, said the trip will spread more diversity “I hope the students have a wonderful time learning throughout campus. about Mexico’s culture and history,” Amaya said. “It’s going to be an awesome trip,” Flam said. He said the department is limiting the trip to 12 stu- Applications are available at the Student Life Office dents. in the Martin Luther King Jr. University Union and The trip counts as two cred- any student can apply to go, Flam said. it hours toward graduation, “Unfortunately not everyone who applies will be and the course title is FLG able to go,” Flam said. “We’re looking for a diverse 2500 - Introduction to “Our group to represent Eastern.” Hispanic Culture. According Monique Cook-Bey, assistant director of student to an informational flier purpose is to life, said the application process has been extended regarding the trip, the course from Friday to Tuesday. requires students to complete expose “I want to make sure we reach out to every stu- a project reflecting planning dent,” Cook-Bey said. and academic preparation students to There are 40 seats for students and each student is concerning the topic they had DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY JOSH REELEY only responsible for a hotel room and meals. More chosen for the project. history and information on costs is on the application, Flam said. In addition, intensive inves- “The students who go will be able to truly share Hanging out tigation into culture and histo- culture with their experience when they get back,” Flam said. John Bailey, a university carpenter, hangs a banner along the ry occurs while in New Mexico.” Becca Finks, chair for the RHA parking committee, walkway between Coleman and Lumpkin halls Thursday afternoon. Mexico. The results of stu- also spoke to RHA and said many students expressed dents’ work will be submitted The banner was being put up to advertise the Spring Career —Carlos Amaya, concerns with freshmen parking at a recent meeting, and academically evaluated. Day/Job Fair on Feb. 11. Spanish professor but not enough to suggest change in parking policies. “Our purpose is to expose “Some people said that parking is a perk for being students to history and culture an upperclassman,” Finks said. “Other people said Cartoons: as a way to stay in touch with with Mexico,” Amaya said. that walking is faster than finding a spot anyway.” CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1 their inner child,” Migler said. “Those who can speak Spanish RHA President Nachel Glynn said all residence hall “Also, more modern cartoons can practice Spanish.” councils will discuss the parking situations before a Babcock said retro cartoons shows are nowhere near as Several regions of Mexico will be studied including possible suggestion is made to the administration are “a comfort food.” awesome as the old ones.” Cozumel, Palenque, Chetumal, Palenque and others. about parking changes. “It’s like going to a fancy Babcock also said “people Several archeological centers will be visited along RHA discussed the change of the five-meal plan to restaurant and ordering maca- like to go back to the things with museums, churches and open-air markets. a seven-meal plan. roni and cheese,” Babcock said. they thought were cool.” Amaya said the temperature in the arid locations “It’s because there are seven days in the week,” Babcock said the preserva- Four years ago, Cartoon will be around 90 degrees Fahrenheit. Glynn said. tion of retro cartoons also is Network started a subsidiary “It will be a nice change from Charleston,” he said. RHA members decided before a suggestion should helped by people creating network called Boomerang, Another change from Charleston is the group’s be made to make the changes, they would have to newer versions of classic which is dedicated to showing opportunity to visit the jungle. The Mayan ruins are review the costs. shows with better animation, the older, retro cartoons. where most of the trip will be spent. “We have to find out if a seven-meal plan would be sound and continuing story “As Cartoon Network The flight will leave O’Hare Airport in Chicago cost effective for the students,” Glynn said. lines. Some of the shows matured and began to create March 11, the Thursday before Spring Break, and 10 Other business included: include the new version of our own shows,” Babcock said. days will be spent in Mexico before arriving back in —the RHA approving a $10 donation to Camp New “Teenage Mutant Ninja “We had less room for the clas- Chicago March 21, just before classes resume. Hope in Mattoon. Turtles” and “Transformers sics that we had launched our The price of the trip will be approximately $1,300, a —the announcement of the Student Leadership Armada.” network with. It was a process price that includes airfare and other transportation, Council meeting on Feb. 5. Migler said the people use of our growth.” hotel, guide fees and entrances to archaeological —the handing out of applications for students to retro cartoons as a way to Babcock said retro cartoons zones. help with the Panther Ambassador Club. return to the past and to their will likely always be around In comparison, a trip to Cancun including food and The Residence Hall Association meets at 5 p.m. on youth. because “good cartoons will drinks will range from $315 at a Holiday Inn to $1281 Thursday in the basement of Andrews Hall. “People use those cartoons stand the test of time.” at the First American Coral, not including airfare. Its Time!

Pick up your free yearbook at Buzzard!

Also coming soon: Information on Individual and Group Photos for this year’s yearbook!

Questions? Please call: 581-2812 Friday, January 23, 2004 THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS 7A

Construction is underway on the new water treatment plant on McKinley Avenue in Charleston. Forms have been set up for cement workers to start pouring the foundation for the underground holding tank that will be below the new facility. DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY STEPHEN HAAS

Water: tious plans, the priorities might be rearranged because of unforeseeable conditions, Barber Public works department said. Buescher cited several examples that could unveils five-year plan affect the arrangement, such as a grant com- ing through that only could be used on The CONTINUED FROM PAGE 1A Square during a certain time period or emer- gency action needing to be taken. Some projects, such as sidewalks, are going “Essentially, the annual retreat is the city to be first on the list because they are most staff putting together proposals for the city doable. In addition, vehicular and pedestrian council,” said Dean Barber, former public traffic volumes also will be considered, works department director. Buescher said. At the retreat, Buescher said the depart- Some of the sidewalks scheduled to receive ments gave presentations concerning the work during the next year include those along progress in the current year and goals for the Edgar Drive, Monroe Avenue, Buchanan future. Avenue and Second Street. Large, colorful maps of the city were a main “It doesn’t take a lot of deciding effort to put part of the presentation given by the Public a lot of plans together for the sidewalks,” Works Department. The five maps –one for Buescher said. “If we have the time, personnel each year of the plan– are color coordinated and money, we could jump into (the projects) and show the projected plants for various and do them quickly.” areas under the department’s jurisdiction. In addition to the $9.1 million water treat- They can be seen in City Hall’s council cham- ment plant, one of the larger projects the bers. Public Works Department will be working on For example, the map showing the projects next year is incorporating Geographic planned for 2004-2005 show a pink highlight Information System (GIS) into the depart- on Edgar Drive from Ninth to 18th streets ment’s computers. showing projected sidewalk creation, while a “At my old department (the Illinois purple line along Davis Drive denotes storm Department of Transportation), we’ve been sewer creation. using GIS for several years,” Buescher said. “The maps are used as a go-by,” Buescher He said using a GIS will allow the city to see said. the streets, utilities and other items on a lay- Buescher, who recently succeeded Barber, ered grid. said one of his first projects with the plan will In coordination with the new water treat- DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY JOSH REELEY not be completing projects. Instead, it will be ment plant, the department also will be work- deciding in what order to complete them. ing on creating a smaller version of the plant, “The actual prioritizing of all the projects or pilot, that will be an exact replica of the Want a cookie? will be done by myself and the members out plant, except on a miniature scale. on the field,” Buescher said. “We are building the pilot to make sure we’ll Doug Bristow (right), a senior computer information systems major and president of Buescher said the items not completed dur- be able to operate a similar plant only on a the Association of Information Technology Professionals, talks with Mike Abernathy, a junior graphic design major, Thursday night outside of Carman Dining Center during a ing the 2003-2004 year will remain in the plan smaller scale,” Buescher said. “We want to new member drive. at the top of the priorities for the coming year. make sure the water being produced by that Although the department starts with ambi- plant is adequate.”

unique This Weekend @ properties did you say Open apartments? 11am Italian Beef w/fries $3.99 2402 S. 18th st. 345-5022 EIU’S 4 O’CLOCK CLUB $1 Drafts $5 Pitcher (Miller Lite, Lienenkugel, Red & Big Butt) FREE Nacho’s w/ Pitcher Purchase 4-6 C Plan a Marty’s BB 345-2171 AN CE Don’t be Scared to L ADVERTISE in the DEN... LE call today 581-2816 D

1512 A Street. P.O. Box 377 Charleston, IL 61920 217 345-4489 - Fax 345-4472 Advertise In The Den 8A THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS Friday, January 23, 2004

HELP WANTED HELP WANTED FOR RENT FOR RENT FOR RENT FOR RENT

Circulation help needed for The Kitchen assistant needed @ Best value, 1400 18th Street. 4 BDRM HOUSE AVAILABLE 4 & 6 houses, 10 month lease. 2BR apts near Buzzard. $460/12 Daily Eastern News. Hours 5:00 Marianne’s Euro Deli. Apply in Furnished, 2bdrm house. ‘04-’05. 1012 2ND STREET. Please call 273-1395 months, water incl. Low utilities, am - 8:00 am. Great pay. Must person. 615 Monroe Street. $250/each. 348-0288 1/2 BLOCK FROM MORTON ______1/27 A/C, coin laundry, ample park- be reliable. Apply in person ______1/30 ______1/23 PARK. CLOSE TO SCHOOL. Two and three bedroom apt. with ing. 345-4489 Wood Rentals, 1802 Buzzard. Would like Friday & Saturdays 3 BR house available now Washer, dryer, gas grill. stove. W/D. $200 each. Near Dominos Jim Wood, Realtor ______00 off? Are you looking for a part- behind Stix. Unfurnished $500 refrigerator, large kitchen, 549-1521 ______1/30 Sr. lady seeks student for light time evening position in a fun, per month rent. Accept 6 central air and heat, 2 bath, ______1/28 3BR HOUSE, fresh carpet, 1 house keeping, small apt. professional office atmosphere? month or 1 year lease. 549- front room, dining room, For 04-05 school year. New 3 block to Stadium, w/d, central Tuesday p.m.(27th) and an Ruffalo Cody/Westaff is seeking 7888. Security Deposit game room, double lot, great bedroom 1 1/2 bath duplex. 2 a/c. $700/12 months for 3 ten- occasional 2 hr shift. 348- professional telephone fundrais- Required. porch, mature trees, oak blocks from campus. Washer, ants. 345-4489, Wood Rentals, 1550, leave name and phone ers. Flexible scheduling, weekly ______1/23 staircase, landlord lives in dyer, ac, deck, yard 348-6394 Jim Wood, Realtor. number. paychecks, holiday bonus For Rent; Girls only: 2 bedroom area. Rent $295/month/per ______1/28 ______1/30 ______1/23 potential for extra cash$$, no apartments across from bedroom. Don’t wait, call 3 bedroom home, Attached SPACIOUS 3BR house near JOURNALISM AND ENGLISH “cold calling” required, help Buzzard. Call 345-2652. Rich 273-7270 garage, w/d, very nice, prefer Stadium, a/c, w/d, 3 QUIET ten- MAJORS. HIRING FOR SEC- raise money for colleges/univer- ______1/24 ______1/27 non-students, $625, 345-4274, ants. New carpet, vinyl, cabi- OND SEMESTER. PROOF sities to lower tuition for current leave message. nets. $750/12 months. 345-4489 READERS/COPY SETTERS. students, apply before Housing Choices... ______1/30 Wood Rentals, Jim Wood, MUST POSSES COMMAND OF November 28. Stop by Westaff 1 bdrm duplex, full bath, living. Realtor. ENGLISH LANGUAGE AND at 700 W. Lincoln or call 345- Brittany Ridge Townhouses Water and trash included for ______1/30 ABILITY TO DISCERN MIS- 1303. rent. IMMEDIATE AVAILABILITY. NEAT 2BR house near Stadium, TAKES IN TEXT QUICKLY AND ______00 3-4 Bedrooms, 2 1/2 baths, a/c, w/d, dw 348-7733 a/c, w/d, 2 QUIET tenants. ACCURATELY. EXPERIENCE DSL, phone, cable jacks, deck, fresh carpet/vinyl. ______1/30 $500/12 months. 345-4489, WITH QUARK AND/OR PAGE- FOR RENT 2-5 residents from $188-300 4BR HOUSE, 1 1/2 baths, w/d, Wood Rentals, Jim Wood, MAKER A PLUS. SCHEDULING walk to Buzzard. 345-4489, Wood Realtor. FLEXIBLE. APPLY AT Rentals, Jim Wood, Realtor. ______1/30 SCHOLASTIC RECOGNITION, 4 BR HOUSE CA, WD, TRASH, 2BR APTS FOR 2, Close to Campus ______1/30 NEAT 3BR house for 3 QUIET INC. 5955 PARK DRIVE, FURNISHED. 345-7244 2BR apt, 1/2 block to Rec Ctr. residents. Fresh carpet, vinyl, CHARLESTON. FOR DIREC- ______1/22 Near Rec Center or Buzzard Bldg. cable incl, central a/c, some bal- cabinets. Washer/dryer, a/c. TIONS CALL 345-9194 Bedroom for spring, sink in the All with a/c, some paid cable or paid water conies. $230/person. 345-4489, $660 month. 345-4489, Wood ______1/23 room. House Privileges, utilities Low utilities, ample parking, coin laundry Wood Rentals, Jim Wood, Rentals, Jim Wood, Realtor. Daycare infant room position included, not apt, 230/m. 345- Realtor. ______1/30 available every day 12-5:30. If 3253 or 348-3945. $230/person 12 months ______1/30 Fall 2004: 1515 1tth, 3 bedroom, interested call Building Blocks at ______1/22 2 bdrm duplex, dining, ws/dry. washer/dryer, 10 month lease, 234-8889 ask for Tina. 3 Bedroom House Close to Water and trash included for $250 each. 1517 11th, 2 bed- ______1/23 Campus Available Fall 2004. 2 2BR APTS for 1 or 2 persons rent. IMMEDIATE AVAILABILITY. room, washer/dryer, 10 month LOCAL APPLIANCE OUTLET: Full Baths with Washer-Dryer Cable, water, trash paid, 1 parking space 348-7733 lease, $285 each. 1521 11th, 3 PART TIME-FULL TIME 2ND and AC. Call 232-8936. ______1/30 bedroom, washer/dryer, 10 SHIFT WORK 11am-8pm. 17 ______1/23 $350 for 1 person, $190 each for 2 2BR moneysaver @ $190/per- month lease, $250 each. Call part time workers needed in 3 BR apt, 2nd floor 1409 9th St. Low electric, coin laundry son. Cable&water incl. Don’t 549-7242 Charleston and Mattoon $376 Newly remodeled, large rooms, miss it. 345-4489, Wood ______1/30 P/Time/Week and $489 Full- NO pets. $250/person+ utilities. Rentals, Jim Wood, Realtor. Available now! Studio located Time/Week for those who qualify MUST SEE! Call Dustin at 630- 1BR APTS for every need and taste ______1/30 close to campus. $320/ month, call Mon-Fri 9am-6pm 217-235- 302-2676 3BR house for 3-4, w/d, 1 block utilities included. Call 348-0006 0073. ______1/23 All shapes & sizes, near & far, neat & ugly to EIU, near Stix & Krackers.. ______2/3 ______1/23 SHARP 4BR house, near For privacy, quiet, convenience, economy Ugly, but mechanically sound. 1,2,3,4 bedroom apts. Fall 2004- Check out the Ramada. Great Buzzard. 2 baths, a/c, From $200 to $375 $630/12mo. 345-4489, Wood 2005. 11 month lease. Security drink specials for EIU students. washer/dryer, $1000/12 mos. Rentals, Jim Wood, Realtor. deposit required. No pets. 348- Bar, restaurant, and front desk Starting May-June 2004. 345- ______1/30 8305 positions available. 300 4489, Wood Rentals, Jim Wood, HOUSES - 2,3,4 BEDROOMS 1 person looking for a roomy ______2/3 Braodway East Mattoon. Realtor. apt? Try this 2BR priced for one 1bedroom apt available immedi- ______1/29 ______1/30 Good locations, various sizes @ $350/mo. Cable TV and water ately. Six month lease. Security Most with a/c, w/d incl. 345-4489, Wood Rentals, deposit required. No pets. 348- Lincolnwood Pinetree Priced for private bedrooms Jim Wood, Realtor. 8305. ______1/30 ______2/3, Apartments Close to campus, 4 Br., 2 bath, Available Fall 2004, Studio apt. Lists available, Showing by appointment Fridge, Stove, WD, 1210 $275/month, includes heat, Division, Linda Nugent relator, water, and trash. Call 897-6266 345-2151, ask for Pud. or 898-9143. Studio 1,2 & 3 Bedroom Apartments ______1/30 ______2/3 Limited Time 3 Bedroom Rent Special CAMPUS CLIPS • Lots of space • Swimming pool 1512 A Street. P.O. Box 377 • Volleyball court Charleston, IL 61920 Across from Carmen Hall Sunday Morning Worship in Buzzard Auditorium on Jan. 25th, 345-6000 217 345-4489 - Fax 345-4472 9:30am prayer in foyer, 10am fellowship and doughnuts, 10:30am worship service in Auditorium.

The Daily Eastern News Classified ad form Crossword Edited by Will Shortz No. 1212 ACROSS 29Tongs, e.g. 50“Potent 12345678 9 1011121314 1Trip break Potables for Name: ______32Like left- 400, ___” 15 16 9Naughty, but overs not too 51“Amare” 17 18 Address: ______35Municipal might be ❏ ❏ 15Valentine facility: Abbr. conjugated 19 20 21 Phone: ______Student: Yes No inscription on it 36Year 22 23 24 25 16Just so Helsinki was 55Improve a 17Like some founded plant 26 27 28 forces 37Needle hole 58Investigates Under classification of: ______18Fundamental 29 30 31 32 33 34 beliefs 38“Some ___ 59Double Expiration code (office use only): ______meat and decker? 35 36 37 38 Person accepting ad: ______Compositor: ______19Places canna eat”: where suck- Burns 60Bring about 39 40 41 42 No. words / days: ______Amount due: $______ers are lined 61Just up 39Preserves 43 44 45 Payment: fruit 62Not worry 21Fictional 46 47 48 49 Check No.______cabbie of old 41High degree radio 50 51 52 53 54 43Possible DOWN 22Race’s end answer to 1Skirt feature 55 56 57 58 23Heat shield “Where are locale you?” 2Tenor 59 60 3It may go 26When 45Kiln 61 62 Dates to run: ______repeated, a from 0 to 46Underbodice 500 Ad to read: dolphin Puzzle by Manny Nosowsky 28“Walk right 48Anima doc- 4Relate 14Author influ- 31Bitterroot 48“Bringing Up in!” tor 5Available enced by 48- Mountains Father” Across locale father

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H S I P M I R E V O P O T S “Dragonwyck “The Thin ” writer Anya 30Plant fungi 47Coeur d’___ Man” Friday, January 23, 2004 THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS 9A

NATIONAL NEWS BRIEFS Chinese New Year brings hope BEIJING (AP) — The Year of the Monkey From Beijing to Singapore, businesses and cities — cars were moving smoothly. arrived Thursday, casting an eerie holiday calm government offices closed for Spring Festival. Even 24-hour stores were shuttered, and tradi- Bush praises special over China’s capital as hundreds of millions of Indonesia marked the Chinese New Year as a tional morning exercisers were absent from people hunkered down in their hometowns and public holiday for only the second time. Tightly parks. The skyline’s ubiquitous cranes, symbols hoped for promised prosperity — and a season controlled Singapore permitted the cacophony of of the frantic building boom, were still. college courses free of two fearsome diseases the government is firecrackers at street level for the first time in Fireworks resonated through the night, and racing to contain. more than 30 years. Roman candles cascaded over the Foreign TROY, N.Y. (AP) — Simeon Cloutier could not afford Authorities announced stepped-up holiday “A new buoyancy is evident everywhere. May Ministry and the Workers Stadium despite a city university tuition to study computer forensics, so he is efforts against SARS and bird flu, tightening this buoyant quality remain with us throughout ban. working his way through community college, learning checks on air, bus and train passengers and the new year,” Hong Kong Chief Executive Tung Shanghai uncorked an all-night fireworks bar- the fast-evolving field in classes closely tailored to what enforcing a crackdown at border posts with Chee-hwa said, welcoming the return of good rage, with firecracker bundles detonated in the employers need. Vietnam to prevent suspicious fowl from enter- times after last year’s SARS epidemic and eco- street inside buckets that amplified the sound. Community colleges, the highly adaptable but often- ing. nomic problems. “No one can sleep, not even with ear plugs in,” overlooked element of higher education, gained a big sup- “The country,” said the official Xinhua News In Thailand, members of the country’s large said convenience store clerk Liu Yuhua. porter this week when President Bush identified them as Agency, “is mobilized.” ethnic Chinese minority made offerings of food Firecrackers are considered a deterrent to evil a key to the nation’s prosperity in his State of the Union The torch-passing from sheep to monkey on temple altars, substituting pizza for the usually spirits and a delightfully noisy way to celebrate, address. under the Chinese astrological calendar was seen popular chicken because of avian flu unease. and they have been a staple of Lunar New Year Many two-year colleges are offering specialized cours- as an auspicious event, not only in traditional cul- In Taiwan, President Chen Shui-bian distrib- celebrations in China for centuries. es in fast-changing areas of technology and business such ture but in modern financial practicality. It coin- uted traditional red “hongbao” money envelopes President Hu Jintao was shown Thursday as computer forensics, which can be used in detective cides with an announcement that the economy in his hometown. To avoid accusations of vote- afternoon making traditional “jiaozi” dumplings work to restore erased hard drives or find the source of grew 9.1 percent last year, and a hopeful tone pre- buying before a March election, Chen’s envelopes with Chinese citizens in what is becoming an viruses and computer worms released by terrorists. vailed. contained only 30 cents — far less than the $6 he annual rite: the government broadcaster showing “The key is to train people for the work which actually “The golden monkey presents us with fortune; handed out last year. senior leaders sitting down with everyday people exists,” Bush said Wednesday at Owens Community our sacred provinces welcome spring,” said the The departure of millions of people from against wintry backdrops. College in Perrysburg Township, Ohio. “No better place Beijing Youth Daily, one of the few of the capital Beijing for the holiday left usually traffic-choked “It’s important not to overstuff the insides,” to do that than in a community college.” city’s dozens of newspapers that published abbre- streets quiet at rush hour and littered with spent said Hu, using chopsticks to poke seasoned pork Cloutier, who attends Hudson Valley Community viated editions on the Lunar New Year’s first scarlet firecrackers. On the ring roads that encir- into dumpling skins in the northern town of College in upstate New York, agrees with Bush. morning. cle the capital — one of the world’s most clogged Zhangjiakou.

FOR RENT FOR RENT FOR RENT FOR RENT SUBLESSORS ANNOUNCEMENTS

Available Fall 2004. Small 2 BR Avail-Jan.-1 BDRM apt, A/C, BUCANNAN ST. APTS: 1,2,&3 Newly remodeled two bedroom Sublessor needed ASAP for Jan- Inexpensive Spring Break Trips! apt. for 1 or 2 people. Only laundry, 1 block to campus. No BDRM APTS AVAILABLE FOR apartments complexly furnished, May ‘04. Jan and May rent 4 destinations to choose from. $300/$350. Good location near pets. Off street parking. FALL 04-05. PLENTY OF OFF parking, laundry, FREE Dsl Fast already paid. $350/mo. 3 BR. Call 345-0820 or (217)962-3122. Morton Park, call 897-6266 or $325/mo. 345-7286 STREET PARKING, WATER AND internet 913 and 917 4th St. Very close to campus. Call Dave Call Today! 898-9143. ______00 TRASH INCLUDED. CALL 345- 345-7437 or 345-8353. 217-549-7168 ______1/23 ______2/3 Unique loft apartment 1 bed- 1266 ______00 ______1/26 Eastside Package Weekend Now leasing for Fall 2004. 3 BR. room, furnished, trash paid, ______00 2 Bd. Furnished Apt. 2 1/2 Sublessor wanted for 1 bedroom Specials. Bud and Bud light houses, 4th St. locations Good available Jan 1st. 1 block from 04-05 fall- 2,3,4 bedroom 2 bath Blocks from Old Main. Trash and apartment on First St. behind 20 bottles $12.99, Michelob Parking. $225 each. Call 897- Buzzard. 345-5088 apts. new, clean, and close to Water included in rent. Low utili- Morton Park. $275/month. Mid and Michelob Light 12 bottles 6266 or 898-9143. ______00 EIU 345-6100. ties. 345-5048 Feb.-July. 232-0138 $8.99, New Players Extreme ______2/3 $299 Free heat, water, trash. Call ______00 ______00 ______1/29 Vodka $12.99, Jose Cuervo 2 Bedroom, 10 or 12 mo lease. Dave 345-2171. 9am-11am BUZZARD STUDENTS. 3 bedroom house, central air, 750ml $15.99, Special Export Water/trash included. 348-7698, ______00 Lincolnwood Pinetree has large complexly furnished. Available LOST & FOUND Kegs $45.00. 18th and leave message. 2 BR APTS. AVAIL 04-05- Check 2 BR apts. available @ 2020 June 1. 1705 4th St. $750. 345- Jackson Ave. Kegs in Stock! ______2/4 locations at www.charlestoni- 10th. Call 345.6000 to see! 8353 or 345-7437 345-5722 3 Bedroom, 10 or 12 mo lease. lapts.com. Roommate rents from ______00 ______00 Cell phone FOUND on 2nd floor ______1/23 Water/trash included. 348-7698, $230 to $255 mo. Call 348-7746 ROYAL HEIGHTS APTS: 1509 S. of Coleman Hall. Go to Political Beginning guitar lessons, guitar leave message. for appointments. 2nd St. 3 BR furnished apts, low ROOMMATES Science office to claim. provided, call Charleston ______2/4 ______00 utilities. New carpet and new ______1/22 Recreation Department. 345- 4 Bdrm. 2 Bathroom House new 1, 2, 3 bedroom apts for 2004- furniture. Leasing for Spring 6897 construction. 3 Blks from cam- 2005. Check out our new web- 2004 and Fall 2003 semesters. Male or Female Roommate FOR SALE ______1/29 pus. 1800 12th Street 868-5610. site: www.jwilliamsrentals.com Call 346-3583 wanted. $200 a month for rent. ACT NOW! Book 11 people, ______2/4 or call 345-7286 ______00 PLus split of utilities. Call 217- get 12th trip free. Group dis- 3 BEDROOM HOUSE CLOSE TO ______00 Single Apt. on square. $299 inc. 820-6696 Sony 46” Big Screen Projection counts for 6+ www.spring- CAMPUS. AVAILABLE FALL APARTMENTS 1/2 BLOCK heat, water, trash. Dave 345- ______2/3 TV. Excellent Condition $750. breakdiscounts.com or 800- 2004, 2 FULL BATHS WITH FROM CAMPUS. 1, 3, 4 BED- 2171 9am-11am. Roommates wanted, $295/month. Phone 549-9239 838-8202 WASHER-DRYER. A/C. CALL ROOMS & STUDIO. CALL 345- ______00 Call Lindsey 348.1479 ______1/23 ______1/30 232-8936 6967 2 bdrm available June. 2 ______00 For sale: Fender Jazz bass with MOVIE EXTRAS, MODELS ______2/10 ______00 blocks from EIU. W/D included. Roommates for 3 BR furnished hard shell case. $400 o.b.o. Call NEEDED. Local Casting call. 3 bedroom apt. $235 each per VERY NICE 6 BEDROOM 2007 11th St. $285 each. 345- apartments. $290 per person. 348-8248 No Experience, age month, 2 blocks from campus. HOUSE. 2 BLOCKS FROM 6100 1509 S. 2nd. Call 346-3583 ______1/27 required, all types looks 345-3554 CAMPUS. WASHER, DYER, ______00 ______00 accepted. Minor/major ______2/16 DISHWASHER, CENTRAL AIR. 5 bdrm house. Available August. FOR SALE roles. Up to $320 a day. Call AVAIL NOW 1 2 3 4 BEDROOM TOTALLY REMODELED! CALL Nice, clean, and close to EIU. SUBLESSORS 1-800-818-7520 LINCOLN OR 9TH STREET. 345-6967 W/D included. 2019 11th St. ______3/2 CALL 348-0157. LANMAN- ______00 345-6100 ATTENTION ALL GRADUAT- SPRING BREAK beach and Ski PROPERTIES.COM Hey Gals! 2 bedroom furnished ______00 Looking for sublessor! 1 bed- ING SENIORS! If you are inter- Trips on Sale Now! Call 1-800- ______2/26 apartment, next to park at 1111 SEITSINGER APARTMENTS- room in 2 bedroom apt. Low rent ested in a yearbook of your SUNCHASE today! Or visit BRITTANY RIDGE townhouses, 2nd St. Water, trash, and laundry 1611 9TH ST. 1 BLOCK EAST and perfect location in front of senior year, and are not sure www.Sunchase.com available now or 2004-2005 for 2- included for $265 each/month. OF OLD MAIN. 1 APARTMENT EIU. Call Andrew 348-1652. how to pick it up, come to the ______3/5 5 tenants. DSL wiring. 345-4489, 10 or 12 month lease available. AVAILABLE SPRING SEMES- Need sublessor ASAP. Student Publications office, #1 Spring Break Vacations! Wood Rentals, Jim Wood, Realtor. Call now at 549-1957 or 348- TER. COMPLETELY FUR- ______1/23 room 1802 Buzzard Hall, and Cancun, Jamaica, Acapulco, ______2/27 5427. NISHED, HEAT, AND Apt for sublease at Lincolnwood for only $4 we will mail you a Bahamas, & Florida! Best Prices! 2 bedroom town house/ apart- ______00 GARBAGE FURNISHED, OFF Pinetree. $250/month + utilities. copy in the Fall when they are Space is limited! Book now & ment furnished, trash pick up 1,2,and 3 bedrooms close to STREET PARKING. CALL 345- Available immediately, call 815- published. Call 581-2812 for Save! 1-800-234-7007 included, 2 blks from campus. campus. 4 locations to choose 7136. 469-6272. more information. www.endlesssummertours.com Call 348-0350. from. Call 345-6533 ______00 ______1/26 ______00 ______3/12 ______00 ______00 STUDENT HOUSE FOR RENT. Exceptionally economical! 1 1814 12th STREET. Looking for bedroom apt. with loft. 3 students to rent 3 bdrm home Furnished for a single or couple. for Fall/Spring 04-05. Walk to $375 month. For one or $430 school, CA, W/D. $825 month month for two. 1 block north of ($275 each). Call 847-395-7640 O’Brian Fild. For school year for info. 2004-2005. Call Jan 345-8350 ______00 ______00 1 Bdrm, large & nice apt avail- Need a semester lease from able now. $295 per month, trash JAN-MAY? We have a unique 2 included. 345-6967 bdrm for rent. 1block from ______00 Buzzard. 345-5088 3 bedroom furnished apartment, ______00 utilities included. Close to cam- “Listed as top landlord for 2003 pus. Call 345-6885 in Eastern News!”1 Bedroom ______00 apts. for August 04-05. PP&W Homes 4 & 3 BR available August. PROPERTIES. 2 EXCELLENT Good locations, WD,DW,CA, LOCATIONS 1 BLOCK, & 1 1/2 TRASH paid. Call 345-3253. BLOCKS NORTH OF OLD MAIN ______00 ON 6TH ST. 1 or 2 person leas- 4 bedroom house 219 Jackson es. Central heat & A/C, laundry Ave. Spacious basement includ- facility. Trash service and off ed. $200 each, available June street parking included. Perfect 1st. 549-1957 or 348-5427 for serious student or couples. ______00 348-8249 ATTENTION GIRLS! IF YOU ______00 WOULD LIKE A NICE, ROOMY, 2004-2005. 3/2 BEDROOM FURNISHED 3 BR APARTMENT HOUSES. 2 BEDROOM, 2 BATH WITH LARGE CLOSETS, LOW APARTMENTS. 1026 EDGAR. RENT, LOW UTILITY BILLS AND 348-5032 A LANDLORD THAT CARES ______00 FOR THE 2004-2005 SCHOOL For 2004/2005 Nice 5 bedroom YEAR, CALL 345-3664. SEEING house. Excellent locations, IS BELIEVING! 10 MONTH cable internet hook-ups in LEASE, NO PETS. every bedroom. ______00 250/person/month. 12 month 2 bedroom apt available Jan 1st! lease. Call 345-0652. Also, Furnished and trash paid. Close nice one bedroom apt. excel- to campus. 345-5088 lent location. 350/month. ______00 ______00 10A THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS Friday, January 23, 2004 Swim teams embark on crusade into season stretch

◆ Men’s and women’s Millikin just this past week. squads take on the Padovan believes the women are swimming as successfully now as Valparaiso Crusaders in they have throughout the entire Indiana season and are on the top of their game. By Michael Gilbert “Actually, they have been swim- ASSOCIATE SPORTS EDITOR ming real well,” Padovan said. “When I’m coaching the meets I Entering the final stretch of the don’t get to see the (swimmer’s) season, the Eastern men’s and times as much as I know who won women’s swim teams will travel to or lost. Looking back we have had Indiana to take on the Valparaiso some solid times and we are defi- Crusaders this weekend. nitely making progress.” On the men’s side, Eastern One of those swimmers “making should be able to walk out of the progress” is sophomore Jenny Valparaiso Athletics-Recreation Curry. After struggling at the Center victorious according to beginning of the season, Curry Panthers head coach Ray Padovan. won two events against Butler (50 “We match up with the men pret- DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY STEPHEN HAAS and 100-free) and also was the vic- ty well,” Padovan said. “We had tor in the 50-free against St. Louis Senior swimmer Jordan Sherbrooke swims in the 1000 freestyle event Friday night in Lantz Nautatorium. (Valpo) at the Panther Invitational three meets ago. back in October and defeated them of those meets has been senior Rich breaststroke from freshman Tyson pushing him (timewise) lately.” With the men’s five consecutive there. If you look at it on paper we Wahlgren. The freestyler leads all Beaman. The Texan picked up his The women’s match up could dual meet victories and the should win.” Panther swimmers with 15 individ- first collegiate win in the 100-yard sway either way as both teams women’s two straight, Padovan At the Panther Invitational, the ual wins including the 200-yard breaststroke on Nov. 20, 2003, and have very similar records. Valpo said the team is shaping up well men quickly disposed of the free seven times this season. followed up that win with another will enter the swim with a 2-5 dual for the season-ending Midwest Crusaders by more than 200 total Right behind Wahlgren is Tom just one meet later against Butler. meet record, while Eastern has Classic Championship in late team points (649-411). Valpo placed Watson. The junior picked up a win While Beaman was not victorious won two consecutive meets and February. second at the six-team meet ahead in the 500-yard free last week against Millikin last week Padovan brings a 3-5 record into this week- “Right now we look pretty of schools Indiana University- against Millikin and now has 12 was impressed with the way the end’s action. good,” Padovan said. “At this point Purdue University at Indianapolis, wins on the year. Most of Watson’s freshman has been swimming “The competition is really much in the season, we’ve done enough Butler, Millikin and Lincoln damage has come in the 500-yard “He’s coming along really well,” closer in the women’s meet than work that we can rest for about College. free, which he has won eight times, Padovan said. “He fills a big role the men’s,” Padovan said. “I feel two weeks before (the “Classics”). The men are currently on a five and the 1000-yard free where he for us in the breaststroke and has we’re much more in control of the The only thing we’re worried meet winning streak and haven’t has been victorious on four differ- had some really nice times in the men’s meet than the women’s.” about right now is sickness, but so tasted defeat since a 143-100 loss ent occasions. 200-yard heats. He likes the short- The Panthers will bring confi- far we’re healthy.” against Illinois-Chicago on Oct. 24. Recently, the Panthers have er events better, but (teammate) dence into the meet after defeat- The meet with Valpo will begin Leading the charge in a majority received much-needed help in the Chad Croucher has really been ing Butler in December and at 1:00 p.m. Saturday.

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Panther sports calendar SATURDAY EIU Mega Meet TBA Lantz Swimming at Valparaiso 1:00 p.m. W Basketball at Tenn. Tech 5:30 p.m. Friday, January 23, 2004 M Basketball at Tenn. Tech 7:30 p.m. PAGE 12A

WOMEN’S BASKETBALL BALL EASTERN 72,AUSTIN PEAY 71 FOUR John Hohenadel SPORTS REPORTER Panthers never say never Follow the ◆ Women ended Austin Peay’s Payton trail 26-game Ohio Valley Conference to coaching winning streak By Matthew Stevens SPORTS EDITOR In the last couple days Eastern alum, Sean Payton, In what could be considered the biggest upset at went from Dallas Cowboys Eastern during the Linda Wunder era, the Panthers assistant head coach/quarter- get a victory against a perennial conference foe. back coach to allegedly being Wunder, Eastern’s head coach, had never beaten the offered the head coach posi- Lady Govs while at Eastern but came in wanting to tion of the Oakland Raiders get a win for her seniors. back to being the assistant “I don’t need to tell you that I’m a little excited head coach/quarterback coach about this one,” Wunder said. “I’m proud of my team. of the Cowboys. They never quit, never gave up and kept their compo- Let’s iron all this out and sure throughout.” put it to rest once and for all. Eastern stopped Austin Peay’s 26-game Ohio Valley In order to get to the bottom Conference winning streak with a 72-71 victory of all this I feel it necessary to Thursday. give a quick overview of the The Lady Govs (10-6, 4-1) hadn’t lost at the Dunn last two days. Center since the end of the 2002 season. “One of the best wins we’ve ever had,” Wunder said. Tuesday “If you take into account we did it, we played fantas- tic.” Senior center Pam O’Connor led the Panthers with According to The Dallas 20 points in the contest in a highly contested battle Morning News and ESPN, with Austin Peay low post threat Gerlonda Hardin. Dallas Cowboys assistant head The Panther front line was a big reason Eastern out coach Sean Payton has agreed rebounded the Lady Govs 46-40. Hardin finished the in principle to become the evening with 21 points and 13 rebounds but got crucial head coach of the Oakland fouls in the second half which left her vulnerable on Raiders Tuesday. defense. Payton is expected to sign a Freshman point guard Megan Casad had a career- four-year deal worth between high 13 points and eight rebounds. More importantly, $1.3 to $1.5 million a year. the Bloomington, Ind. native played 35 minutes and The Raiders are not con- committed only one turnover. firming the hire but have The Panthers (5-11, 2-3) stayed close the entire scheduled a press conference game not getting down by double figures in the sec- Thursday where it’s expected ond half. Eastern went on a 15-7 run to take a two- they will name its head coach. point lead. It seemed as though Payton Ironically, it was a player who had resided in was set to become the Wunder’s doghouse during the conference season. youngest head coach in the Sophomore Megan Sparks had been taken out of the NFL. However football is a starting lineup for the last couple of contest but came game of inches and I guess off the bench to inspire the Panthers late in this win. that applies even to the hiring Sparks led a two-on-one fast break giving Eastern of new coaches. For the its second lead of the contest at 66-64. The Mattoon, Oakland head coaching job Ill. native summed up the courage to hit the crucial was inches from Payton’s shot of the game when she hit a three-pointer with 33 grasp when it all fell apart. seconds left to give Eastern the lead for good. “Megan did a really good job on both ends of the Wednesday floor,” Wunder said. “She certainly wasn’t afraid to step up and three.” After coming off a 30-point victory at home against Sources have confirmed Tennessee State, Wunder felt her crew was more Payton has declined the job focused against the Lady Govs. offer from the Raiders and “We seemed to had a different mind set tonight like will return to his position with no matter what happened we knew we could win,” the Dallas Cowboys as assis- Wunder said. tant head coach/quarterback DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY STEPHEN HAAS coach along with a contract ◆ extension and a pay raise. SEE NEVER Page 11A “I don’t know where this got Eastern sophomore guard Megan Sparks scored 11 points off the bench, including a game started,” Davis said in a press winning three pointer with 33 seconds left to lift the Panthers to a 72-71 win Thursday. conference Wednesday. “There will be a time period before a coach will be hired.” The Raiders’ public rela- MEN’S BASKETBALL tions department confirmed no press conference is sched- EASTERN 57, AUSTIN PEAY 64 uled for Thursday. Today’s news on the Payton situation may come as a sur- prise. Men continue losing streak Sources have confirmed Davis did offer Payton the reported four-year $1.3 to $1.5 By Aaron Seidlitz million deal. SPORTS REPORTER 24-23, but Eastern could not hold onto the The deal was offered but lead as Austin Peay managed to shoot well then un-offered for what rea- The Panthers four game road trip began when it mattered the most. son you ask? Thursday night at Austin Peay, and Eastern The Governors started off the game hot The same source who con- came out on the losing end for the fourth and after hitting their first five shots from firmed the deal was offered straight game in Ohio Valley Conference the field, Austin Peay held a 12-3 lead. also stated the reason the deal play. They also shot well in the final 10 minutes was not accepted by Payton. In a game Eastern head coach Rick of the game after going through a long The reason was Payton and Samuels thought would be a refreshed and drought that allowed Eastern to build up a Davis didn’t see eye to eye on more effective effort from his squad, the lead. some personnel issues. OVC leading Governors pulled away from After the Governors started the game The source said Payton the Panthers in the final minutes of the sec- off well, Eastern continued to shift wanted to begin the rebuilding ond half. between two different types of zone and process of the Raiders after The final 20 minutes, which proved to be man-to-man on the defensive side of the their dismal 4-12 2003 season when the Panthers stumbled once again, ball. which included blowing up the was dominated by Austin Peay who current team. outscored Eastern 41-33 led to a 64-57 win. SEE STREAK ◆ Page 11A Once again the Panthers led at halftime DAILY EASTERN NEWS PHOTO BY STEPHEN HAAS SEE HOHENADEL ◆ Page 11A Junior guard Emanuel Dildy scored 11 points on 4-7 shooting in Eastern’s 64-57 loss Thursday. REVIEW THIS ON THE VERGE OF THE WEEKEND WWE’s “Originals” can’t get much Friday, January 23, 2004 worse Section B Proving once and for all that no wrester has any business quitting his or her respective day job. Page 8B Grade: D

◆Six local bands and artists set to play at the first ever “Chili Jam,” to be held at Roc’s on the Charleston Square Sunday.

See story, Page 2B

ADVICE COLUMN... FEATURE DVD REVIEWS CONCERT CALENDAR

Dan and Holly answer the never St. Louis rockers sullen and New Line Cinema’s “Freddy Vs. Jason” The Rural Kings, Saltwater ending question, “To be, or not to local punks Saltwater Vampires polishes up a sub-par horror romp with Vampires, Twista and more in be ... greek?” return to Charleston Saturday. loads of extras. upcoming shows.

◆ ◆ ◆ ◆ Page 2B Page 5B Page 8B Page 8B 2B ON THE VERGE OF THE WEEKEND ◆ THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS Friday, January 23, 2004 ADVICE COLUMN To greek or not to greek?

Dear Verge: you socially. You are in college now, and even though they mean well, they have no business I am a sophomore who is curious about trying to pick your friends. You can still get PREDICTIONS whether or not Greek life is right for me. My the most out of college without going Greek. PHOTO ILLUSTRATION BY DAN VALENZIANO parents pressure me to join a sorority On the other hand, your political, artistic The all-knowing magic eight ball. because they want me to "get the most out of friends are entitled to their opinions about college," and I have a small group of friends. I Greeks and non-Greeks. Your friends may Dan Valenziano overheard that some sororities are having have had bad experiences with Greeks or Magic 8 ball predictions: informal rush right now, but all my friends may judge them on face value. Verge editor are very political, artistic people who detest There are many Recognized Student greeks. I didn't go through fall rush because Organizations to choose from if you want to He also is a it was too much pressure, and my friends get the most out of college. Art groups, politi- 2004 sex symbols edition junior journalism would antagonize me. How do I find out for cal groups, sports groups, music groups, film major. myself if I'm really meant to be a "sorority clubs – the possibilities are endless. You could 1. 2004 sex symbol: NBC Late 5. 2004 sex symbol: Martha He can be reached girl," without alienating my non-Greek even start your own group if you can’t find Night host Conan O’Brian Stewart at 581-2812 or friends or compromising myself? one that fits or if you decide Greek life isn’t Magic 8-Ball says: Outlook Magic 8-Ball says: Don’t Count [email protected] for you. Good on It om Sincerely, If you are interested in sororities, though, Independent in Limbo you should check it out. You’ll never know 2. 2004 sex symbol: Comedy 6. 2004 sex symbol: the Rev. Al unless you get information. Central’s “The Daily Show” host Sharpton (when asked later) He said: I have had a great time in college without Jon Stewart Magic 8 Ball says: It is Certain Just because you want to check out Greek joining a sorority. I have made terrific friends Magic 8-Ball says: Yes life doesn’t mean you want to replace your old and learned a lot about people through RSOs. 7. 2004 sex symbol: US friends with new ones. If you have a small, But I have also made friends from all walks of 3. 2004 sex symbol: National National Security Advisor tight group of friends, very little will come life, including Greeks and non-Greeks. True Security Advisor Condoleeza Condoleeza Rice (when asked between you. I’ve been a member of Sigma friends appreciate you for being unique, not Rice later) Phi Epsilon for two years now, and I still have because you follow their guidelines for life. Magic 8-ball says: Ask Again Magic 8 Ball says: You May a lot of friends who aren’t in the Greek com- The best way to have a productive college Later Rely on It munity. If your friends are truly friends, they experience is to try new things and don’t let won’t be bothered that you want to try some- your friends and family hamper your inter- 4. 2004 sex symbol: the Rev. Al 8. 2004 sex symbol: Avril thing that might broaden your horizons. ests. It won’t really matter what your parents Sharpton Lavigne Maybe it’ll end up that you don’t like the or friends thought after you have completed Magic 8-Ball says: Reply Hazy Magic 8 Ball says: Who in the Greek life, and maybe you will. But either college. What will matter is how you spent -Try Again Hell is That? way, your friends will still be your friends. your time. You can do what others think you Holly Henschen I will tell you this – being Greek has been a should do, or do what you really want to do. Associate Verge great experience for me. I’ve met some of the editor most fun and interesting people I’ve know because I joined a fraternity. I’ve made bonds An advice column success story UB’s got movies She also is a and friendships that I’m sure will continue all senior political my life. Some people scoff at the Greek sys- Dear Verge, By Dan Valenziano science and tem, but it does a lot for this campus, this That you so much for the advice! I asked VERGE EDITOR Upcoming UB movies journalism major. community and those involved. one of our mutual friends to talk to him and If you’re at all curious, I think you should feel the situation out. About two hours later, Psst ... there’s free movies to be ◆ Jan. 24 – “Matchstick Men” definitely rush. College is all about trying new he called me asking if I wanted to go grab seen on campus. Almost every ◆ Jan. 31 – “SWAT” things. If you don’t like it, fine. But if you do, something to eat and watch a movie. I think Saturday, the University Board I’m sure your friends will understand. Just your advice was FANTASTIC and I love how shows free films in Buzzard Hall. ◆ Feb. 9 – “Under the Tuscan make sure you don’t make the mistake of for- I get a girl’s perspective along with a guy’s Margie Tucker, graduate assis- Sun” getting those who have always been there for advice. Point blank, YOU GUYS ROCK! tant for the UB in charge of movies, you. Thanks again! said the UB gets its films from a ◆ Feb. 21 – “Harlem Nights” company called Swank Motion She said: -On Top of the World (formerly known as Pictures Inc., most of which are on First of all, don’t let your parents pressure “Hiding Under a Rock”) VHS tapes. Although applications for the Tucker said the UB prefers using position are not yet available, VHS rather than film form because Tucker said they will be very soon. Does your life blow? there is less of a chance that some- “We’ll probably start interview- thing will go wrong. ing in a couple weeks,” she said. “Pretty much, we’ve realized that “We try to get it done as soon as pos- The Verge may be able certain companies use film,” she sible.” said. Tucker said the UB wants some- to fix your wagon! Tucker said the UB will show 13 one who “has a lot of knowledge of movies over the course of the movies.” semester, including those already The coordinator would be Try our new shown. required to be at the movie show- Each movie costs about $650, ings from about 4 p.m. to 10 p.m. on advice column. Tucker said, including shipping the Saturdays they are shown. charges. “They have to attend UB meet- “The costs are pretty much the ings on Tuesday night,” Tucker said, same,” she said. “We order the “and meetings with their graduate movies at the same time so we get adviser.” pretty much a block price.” When applications for the posi- Tucker said the movie coordina- tion become available, they can be tor and committee “try to pick picked up in the Student Activities (movies) that are going to be the Center, located on the second floor biggest hits.” of the Martin Luther King Jr. Email Holly and Dan at [email protected] She said about 100 students University Union. attend the shows, which occur at 5 Tucker said the UB movie com- p.m. and 8 p.m. in the Buzzard Hall mittee isn’t in need of more mem- Auditorium. bers but it is “always open to more Staff Dan Valenziano, Verge editor Jeff Stauber, Copy editor The position of UB movie coordi- people if they’d like to join.” ON THE VERGE OF THE WEEKEND Holly Henschen, Associate Verge editor Ben Erwin, Cover design nator has recently been vacated. For more information call the “This is the first week we’ve been Student Life Office at 581-3117. Jesse Wu, Copy editor without a coordinator,” she said. me Pawn S ADVERTISE PParkark PPlacelace pre ho and soon you Apartments u 345-0777 p ROOMMATES WANTED $ Sell Your Items! will bling 1, 2, 3 Bedroom Apartments For Fall 2004 We Buy Anything! We Pay the Most in the Area! 581-2816 Spring 2004 Housing Still Available!!! 10–5, Mon.–Sat. • 1000 18th St. Contact Lindsey @ 348-1479

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By Dan Valenziano and/or other Illinois populations. The Task More on the Web VERGE EDITOR “What we have are runaway Force will operate under the Illinois Department of Public Health. On or before Campaign for Better Health Care: Grab a spoon and dig into some Chili Jam. (health insurance) costs with July 1, 2007 the State of Illinois shall imple- www.cbhconline.org The event, to be held at Roc’s Sunday, will ment a plan to provide access to health feature all-you-can-eat chili and perform- absolutely nothing stopping care.” ances by Motherlode, Steve Allen’s Spoon explained her organization’s rea- Miscellaneous Jubilee Jam Band, The Rural them. The insurance industry son for supporting the act. health care.” Kings, Reverend Robert, Wollen-Danners “What we have are runaway (health Wendy Meyer, rhythm guitarist for and John Elder. has managed to make univer- insurance) costs with absolutely nothing Motherlode, said she was happy to be play- Patrons will be charged $10 for adults stopping them,” she said. “The insurance ing at the event. and $5 for children. All proceeds from the sal health care into this big industry has managed to make universal “Abosolutely, we support (the CBHC),” event will benefit the East Central Illinois health care into this big boogie man that she said. Committee, a local healthcare consumer boogie man that scares scares everybody.” “Of course we would like healthcare to be group. The ECIC, which is part of the everybody.” Spoon said there is enough money at the affordable to everybody. We all have family Campaign for Better Health Care, meets state level to provide universal healthcare. members or friends who don’t have health monthly in Charleston and strives to identi- —Becky Spoon, member of the East Central Illinois “It’s not the money, it’s the political will care because it’s unaffordable.” fy and address the specific health care Committee that we lack,” said Spoon. Meyer said she had another reason to be needs of the community. A similar plan passed the Illinois State excited about the show. A raffle, silent auction and a bake sale at House of Representatives and missed pass- “I’m very excited about it due to the the event will also raise money for the ing in the Illinois State Senate by one vote cause and also, I miss hearing (band mate cause. Health Care justice act is a “process plan to last year. Gaye Harrison) play violin,” she said. Mike Knoop, owner of Roc’s, said he achieve universal health care.” “The system we have is unaffordable and Harrison was recently involved in an decided to have the event because he knew “It is not one specific plan to achieve uni- unsustainable,” Spoon said. “Medical bills accident which lead to the partial amputa- everybody involved and agreed with the versal health care. The effective date for are the primary cause of bankruptcy in tion of one of her fingers. cause. implementation of this Act will be July 1st, Illinois.” Because of Harrison’s injury, Meyer said “Everybody deserves health care,” he 2004. It requires the creation of a Health Spoon said the money received from the the band hasn’t played much lately. said. Care Task Force within 30 days of its enact- Chili Jam will be used for mailings to Knoop said this may not be the only Chili However, the event wasn’t actually ment to oversee the gathering of public inform the public on state healthcare Jam at Roc’s. Knoop’s idea. input and recommendations for a universal issues. “We’ll see how it goes and we’ll see how He said Becky Spoon, a member of the access health care plan. The Act does not Knoop said he is hopeful that attendence organization holds up,” Knoop said. ECIC, came up with the idea to hold the mandate one plan over another plan, but will be high. “Healthcare is a very serious thing.” event. develops a process to assess which plan or “I think there’ll be quite a lot of people Roc’s is located at 410 Sixth St., on the Spoon said her group is campaigning for plans would work for the State of Illinois. here,” he said. “There’s really not much else square in Charleston. the passage of the Health Care Justice Act. The plan or plans debated and implemented to do on a Sunday and we’ll have a real wide According to the CBHC Web site, the may deal with those currently uninsured variety of music. Come on out and support

SUBMITTED PHOTO SUBMITTED PHOTO Band members of The Rural Kings Band members of Motherlode

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◆Charleston band The Rural Kings is com- even provided the group with Rural King hats, Zordani said. The band formation began when Scott and Zordani played posed of two Eastern professors, a graduate acoustic shows last spring. Over the summer, Zordani invited student and two alums. everyone else to play, he said. The Rural Kings were familiar with each other as Charleston residents. By Holly Henschen But the members are no strangers to Charleston musical ASSOCIATE VERGE EDITOR groups. PHOTOS BY DAN VALENZIANO Zordani was in Uncle Filthy and the Cub Scouts (he was the uncle) and the Charleston Sound Machine. Farrell was in Imagine your professor playing in a band. Now imagine Baked Alaska and Broken Handle with Aranowski, who also being in a band with your professor. For five members of was in Dead Sea Squirrels. Ducar drummed for instrumental extended Eastern community, this stretch of the imagination surf band Hit Gone Bad. is reality. The easy cohesion of such varying campus members can Charleston’s mix of college town and farming community mostly be traced to the university. has given birth to The Rural Kings, a self-described road- Zordani taught Ducar in english 1001 and 1002. house rock group composed of two Eastern professors, a “He was a great student first semester. Second semester he graduate student, an alum who teaches at Lakeland slacked like a pig and I gave him a C,” Zordani said. Community College and an ex-student who graduated last But musicians seem to gravitate toward one another. semester. “It just came up in class. Music always comes up,” Zordani The lifestyles of The Rural Kings may not be identical or said. even similar, but the age difference in the band is not appar- Ducar remembers writing that he played drums in a com- ent in their self-described “roadhouse rock” sound. pare and contrast paper for Zordani’s class. “I don’t feel it (the age difference) a bit,” Bob Zordani said “We just became friends from his first semester freshman about the band’s generation gap. year,” Zordani said. “Fortunately, Bob and I are so immature, we fit in,” Marty The Rural Kings’ songs mix elements of their life experi- Scott said. ences with leanings toward their aforementioned musical Guitarist and Eastern English professor Scott described influences. the band: “Bob (harmonica and vocals) and I are poets and “Marty’s prolific. He either brings in old songs or writes essayists and professors, Jeff (Aranowski, guitar) is a teacher new ones,” said Zordani. (at Lakeland and Parkland Community Colleges) and a politi- ”Some of our standout songs I write with Jeff, or with cal scientist, Kevin (Farrell, bass) is working on his psychol- Kevin, too,” Scott said. ogy Masters. He has mixed content from the Bible as Literature class he “And Scotty (Ducar, drums), well, Scotty, he has a degree in teaches into a song called “Bible Belt.” sociology.” “It’s about the violence organized religion can do to peo- The Rural Kings practice in Zordani’s “Jesus Room” in his ple’s souls and the violence substance addictions can do as house on 10th street. The room is festooned wall-to-wall with well (sex, drugs and rock and roll),” Marty said. “So there’s no crucifixes, statues and dramatic Christian art. The worn off- resolution in the song except disappointment.” white walls sharply contrast the shiny black and silver of Lead guitarist Jeff Aranowski plays a solo as bassist Kevin The Rural Kings also fuse a church hymn with a tradition- amplifiers, quarter-inch cables and microphone stands. Farrel lays down the bass line. al folk tune. As Scott sings the well-known “Amazing Grace,” The Rural Kings’ age differences do show, though, in their the band plays “House of the Rising Sun.” musical influences. Ducar, the youngest member at 22, touch of folk,” Zordani said of the band’s music. Currently, Zordani said, they stick to playing in Charleston claims allegiance to Black Flag, while 45-year-old Scott said As for their namesake retail outlet, The Rural Kings are but plan to play in Tuscola and Champaign. Neil Young and old blues contributed to his style. Between proud supporters. Scott said he shops for home improvement The Rural Kings have performed at The Uptowner and those two extremes are Black Sabbath, credited by Farrell; supplies there. Friends and Co. Allman Brothers, Aranowski’s pick; and more old blues influ- “I love that place!” Zordani said. ”I bought a riding lawn- In addition to playing at Campaign for Better Health Care ences from Zordani. mower there and a Rototiller.” Chili Jam at Top of the Roc Sunday, they headline Friday at “It’s blues-fazed rock-n-roll with a touch of country and a The manager of a nearby Rural King enjoys the band and Friends with The Rumbleshack Orchestra.

The Rural Kings, (counterclockwise from right) Marty Scott, Scotty Ducar and Jeff Aranowski, Bob Zordani (harmonica, vocals) signs backup for lead singer and fellow English professor practice in harmonica player Bob Zordani’s “Jesus Room.” Marty Scott.

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Come in or call 348-8343 Friday, January 23, 2004 ON THE VERGE OF THE WEEKEND N THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS 5B Sullen, Saltwater Vampires return to Charleston By Ben Erwin one, so we decided to play those STAFF WRITER and learn a few covers.” The band then spread its name Saturday marks a homecoming by opening for the likes of The of sorts for a beloved local act as Arrivals, The Tossers, Ohio River well as the return of one of St. Rats and a slew of more estab- Louis’ prominent rock acts, as lished groups. Saltwater Vampires Friends & Co. welcomes veterans also have received a myriad of Sullen alongside area favorites positive press from “MAXIMUM- Saltwater Vampires. ROCKANDROLL” and “Impact Comprised of guitarists/vocal- Press” among others. ists Justin Slazinik and Shanna The band has built its impres- Kiels, along with drummer Scott sive reputation on the strength of Freman, Sullen has slogged its frenetic live shows and won over a way through clubs around the small legion of fans locally by tire- country for years. But the band lessly touring. was first noticed regionally after a Saltwater Vampires may have chance meeting at one of its first been away from Charleston for St. Louis shows. some time, but it appears little has The seemingly innocuous gig at changed for the rockers. the now defunct St. Louis venue “We're still the champions of the The Karma served to jump-started PHOTO COURTESY OF SALTWATERVAMPIRES.COM Midwest. We're still poor. We're the group’s career. still drunk,” the group’s Web site Cumberland County natives Saltwater Vampires will open for Sullen Saturday night at Friends & Co. “We had been calling all clubs proudly proclaims. and we begged for them to put us Kiel, likewise, is optimistic for on,” Kiel said. “It was cool to see (Thick) heard of us. Touring with fortable talking over a can of beer Saltwater Vampires, finally return Sullen’s return. “We did well people lined up around the block Local H got our name out there, than being taken out for sushi in to Charleston after months of tour- enough last time to come back and just to see a show.” It was here and Scott (Lucas, lead singer of L.A,” she laughed. ing. any return show is a good one.” Sullen befriended Chicago’s Local Local H) was helping us, and Sullen’s debut for Thick, “Paint The group – comprised of Travis As for the show itself, Kiel only H, and the Zion natives quickly labels started courting us a little,” the Moon,” was met with positive Shoot on guitar and vocals, Lance confirmed the entropic nature of took a shining to the trio. Kiels said. reviews and the band continued Shoots on bass and vocals and any good rock show. The group was so impressed It was during these meetings, touring throughout the Midwest Chris James on drums – began “I think we are a car crash on with Sullen, a stint as an opening however, the band realized being and around the country. Since the more than two years ago as a back- stage,” she said. “Some people love act quickly followed for the St. “wined and dined” by bigger release of “Moon,” the group has lash to a local scene the group’s it and some people hate it, but Louis natives. It was during this labels simply wasn’t fitting. Only consistently toured, though Kiel members thought was too bland. they’ll love to watch it. We just period Sullen was attracting the after meeting in the offices of said the group has been busy “None of us really liked the love playing and it gets better buzz that would lead to an eventu- Thick Records in Chicago did recording demos and preparing music that anyone else was play- every time.” al signing with Chicago indie pow- Kiels say she felt right about a for another Thick release. ing,” Shoot said previously. “I The car crash begins at 10 p.m. erhouse Thick Records. label. The show’s openers, started writing. And then, basical- with a $3 cover. “I still don’t know how they “I guess we were just more com- Cumberland County natives ly, I had four songs and Chris had Fire bad! Pilot order good! Hidden musical tracks no longer a novelty (AP) --He's alive! expected to be the Martin Scorsese and author producer/helmer's first on-air While browsing through CDs last week, I noticed Dean Koontz are teaming up with foray into scripted series televi- Simple Plan’s “No Pads, No Helmets ... Just Balls.” I NEWSERTAINMENT helmer Marcus Nispel and produc- sion; he produced a nonfiction PBS wasn’t interested in it at all; it just happened to fall er Tony Krantz to resurrect Dr. miniseries on the blues last fall. before Slayer in the alphabetized selection. Frankenstein and his monster as a Casting will start next week for Nonetheless, a bright yellow sticker on the Simple Plan By Holly Henschen weekly series for USA Network. a mid-April production start date. CD announced “Suprise Hidden Track!” ASSOCIATE VERGE EDITOR Cabler has greenlit production "It's amazing to have this cre- Now what is that? How can a track be a surprise or on an update of the Mary Shelley ative team in the same room, let hidden if you are expecting it because a promotional classic with a contemporary alone working for us on a project sticker markets it on the cover? tarianism, as Maynard James Keenan testifies that he twist, ordering a two-hour pilot of this scope," said USA exec VP of I remember the first time I heard a realhidden track. talks to carrots who are frightened of death. and four scripts of the project. programming Jeff Wachtel. "I It was 1993. I was 11 years old and sleeping over at my “Tommorow is harvest day,” they told him, “But for USA won't formally greenlight have always loved the idea of friend Carrie’s house. After the usual teenage slumber them, it is the Holocaust.” But he obviuosly doesn’t pity production on the four episodes rethinking classic stories as con- party of painting our nails, watching movies and read- them too much, as he follows that speech by repeating until after filming of the pilot temporary 'urban myths' and we ing YM magazine, we popped in a CD and talked until “This ... is ... necessary.” Tool’s box set “Salival” con- starts, though all involved are are thrilled that Frankenstein will we exhaustedly fell asleep. tains a hidden track, which I found to be one of their proceeding as if "Frankenstein" come to life in the hands of these But what we awoke to was the most grating, abra- best songs. I first thought it was called “Maynard’s will launch as an event series, gifted artists." sive marvelous noise I had ever heard. Unintelligeable Dead,” though I decline to name it. You’ll have to check most likely this fall. The series picks up in present- screaming and guitar distortion from hell that broke to it out to see what I mean. Scorsese, Koontz and Krantz day Seattle, where doctor Victor a drugged-out sounding melody and nasal crooning Another great hidden track is on Deftones on ("24," "Felicity") will exec produce Frankenstein and his creature forced me to jolt out of my sleeping bag and made “Around the Fur” called “Damone.” "Frankenstein," to be helmed by reside, having survived the past Carrie run to flip on the light switch. Many bands jumped on the hidden bandwagon. Nispel, who directed the recent two centuries through the doctor's We were listening to Nirvana’s 1992 major-label Counting Crows, Everclear, Alanis Morrisette, hed remake of "Texas Chainsaw genetic tinkering. Their story is debut, the now historic “Nevermind.” The song was P.E., Incubus and countless others have with Massacre." While Krantz's Flame augmented with that of a female “Endless, Nameless.” There may have been hidden hidden tracks. Some bands even chose to extend the Television is based at Warner cop and her partner who, through tracks before it, but until that night I had never heard final track, only to showcase their reverb, distortion, Bros. TV, studio won't be produc- a seemingly standard homicide one. And I think it changed my life. mistakes or answering machine messages. What a ing this project. Conversations investigation, unravel the myth of I searched for a hidden track on every CD I bought waste. It almost seems mandatory these days to drag with several other potential stu- Frankenstein. for years after that. In 1992 I found one on Nine Inch out your last song 5, 10 or even 20 minutes. dios are already under way. Skein will have close-ended ele- Nails’ “Broken”- a cover of Adam and the Ants’ Most recently, Pearl Jam’s “Lost Dogs” rarities and In a rare move, Koontz actually ments thanks to the cop franchise, “(You’re So) Physical,” as well as another on Green B-sides disc two saves a song called “4/20/02” for very wrote the pilot on spec before which envisions the original Day’s 1994 “Dookie. In the same year, Stone Temple last. It’s about the death of Alice in Chains vocalist pitching it to nets. He and Krantz Frankenstein monster teaming up Pilots “Purple” had a great ditty rounding out its Layne Staley. Pearl Jam may have staggered this one both wanted to maintain as much with the cops to battle both Dr. twelve gracious melodies. to keep the memory of their friend from being exploit- independence during the develop- Frankenstein and his small army Tool has had some great hidden tracks with ques- ed. ment process as possible. of genetic freaks. Krantz said tionable meanings throughout the years. The last track These days, most hidden tracks are marketable and Scorsese, who's been looking to Victor Frankenstein will be "as on 1992’s “Opiate” details an encounter with a friend expected, not like the buried treasure they used to be. get more involved in TV, then interesting a villain as there is on who embarks on a new chemical adventure. The hid- came on board. "Frankenstein" is television." (VARIETY) den song on 1994’s “Undertow” may be mocking vege- Twice is Nice Clothing 1100 18th Street Charleston, Illinois 61920 Accessories Only the best in consignment resale Shoes for Family and Home Wedding Formal Store wide 50% off going on Now! Furniture Spring Season starts soon!! Housewares & More! M-F 9a-5p & Sat 10a-4p Merchandise accepted by appt. only

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By CHRISTY LEMIRE “The Butterfly Effect” He’s back seven years ago, or 13 (AP) --Very few movies have Eric Bress and J. Mackye Gruber, years ago. scripts lead Writers made me want to get up from my directors He tries to save his longtime seat and leave the theater. “The girlfriend, Kayleigh (Amy Smart), Butterfly Effect” is one of them. from her eventual suicide, his And it’s not even Ashton beleaguered mother (Melora Guild nominees Kutcher’s fault, though he’s an Walters) from cancer and a child- easy target — the “Dude, Where’s cially younger fans who deify hood friend (Elden Henson) from a My Car?” dude asking to be taken Kutcher, “The Butterfly Effect” is life of depression. Usually, though, LOS ANGELES (AP) — Five movies about culture clashes and strangers seriously in a dramatic role. probably inappropriate. It’s cer- his attempts at retroactive in strange lands collected nominations Thursday for best original movie Besides serving as one of the tainly inappropriate for fans of redemption lead to someone else’s script from the Writers Guild of America. film’s executive producers, he film. misfortune. Among the contenders for best original screenplay were “Bend It Like plays bearded, flannel-clad college Kutcher himself isn’t bad. It’s standard time-travel stuff — Beckham,” about the daughter of a traditionalist Indian Sikh family in student Evan Treborn, who goes Sporadically, the co-star of the Fox imagine “Time Bandits,” without England who dreams of playing soccer; “Lost in Translation,” with Bill back in time by reading his old sitcom “That ’70s Show” even the dwarves or the twisted sense of Murray and Scarlett Johansson as lonely Americans in a Tokyo hotel; and journals in hopes of reversing his shows glimmers of his trademark humor (or the talent, come to think “Dirty Pretty Things,” about a Nigerian immigrant who uncovers grim wretched childhood. goofy enthusiasm — like when one of it). dealings in London’s underbelly. What Evan finds there is gratu- of Evan’s tinkerings with time The film’s philosophical and psy- The other nominees were “The Station Agent,” about an embittered itously disgusting: memories of turns him into a frat boy, and he chological twists won’t leave much dwarf who makes friends despite trying to isolate himself, and “In molestation and brutal animal takes a sort of wild-eyed glee in of a lasting effect. America,” director Jim Sheridan’s semi-autobiographical tale of an Irish abuse, among the traumatic events hazing the pledges. What stuck with me was the immigrant family struggling to survive in New York. that seem shocking for shock’s The title of the film, co-written image of Evan’s childhood dog, a Sheridan collaborated on the screenplay with daughters Naomi, now 30, sake. And because he returns to his and co-directed by Eric Bress and scruffy white terrier, being placed and Kirsten, 27. past repeatedly, we’re forced to J. Mackye Gruber, comes from the in a burlap sack, tied up with rope, “What father wouldn’t be happy to be up there with his daughters?” he watch all this over and over, with chaos theory — that a butterfly doused with lighter fluid, then set said Thursday. “This gets me so many brownie points with the family that slightly varying results each time. could flap its wings in Brazil and on fire. The whole sequence is it scares me.” I kept hoping this would turn out cause a tornado in Texas. totally unnecessary. He said he let his daughters do their own drafts of the script, “basically to be one of Kutcher’s elaborate Evan seems to have a similar It’s enough to make me want to because I knew when the vanity and egocentricity of doing your own story “Punk’d” pranks — that the cam- effect when he reads the horrific flap my wings and go back in time is difficult. ... It was humbling. I would urge any parent to get their children eramen would pop out from behind details in his old diaries, which he before I saw “The Butterfly to write a script about them.” the scenes, laughing, and that this kept to jog his memory after suf- Effect.” In the category for best adapted screenplay, the true-life racehorse attempt at drama/sci-fi/whatever fering chronic blackouts. His “The Butterfly Effect,” a New drama “Seabiscuit” and the J.R.R. Tolkien fantasy “The Lord of the Rings: would all be a joke on us. words jumble and jump off the Line Cinema release, is rated R for The Return of the King” were picked to compete against “American It wasn’t, but that reminds me — page, then everything around him violence, sexual content, language Splendor,” about comic book writer Harvey Pekar, and the novels-turned- for fans of the MTV series, espe- gets loud and chaotic, and poof! and brief drug use. movies “Cold Mountain” and “Mystic River.” “Seabiscuit” director Gary Ross, who adapted the screenplay from author Laura Hillenbrand’s best-selling book, said he was grateful that ‘Traffic’miniseries traces human other writers recognized his efforts to add a dramatic “spine” to the real- life story. “It was such a famous and popular piece of history that it felt like a real challenge to make this a personal movie, which is the only way to move peo- side of global drug trafficking ple,” he said. “For me, it was about the interdependence of three people (jockey Red Pollard, trainer Tom Smith and owner Charles Howard) and NEW YORK (AP) — “Traffic” is working to dismantle drug opera- What made the original “Traffik” how they pulled each other out of the depths of despair and crisis.” proving to be one of the most durable tions in Afghanistan while his wife so convincing was its cast of largely Television drama nominees included two episodes of “Law & Order: entertainment formulas of our time. Carole (Mary McCormack) and unknown actors, most notably Jamal SVU,” along with installments of “The West Wing,” the original “Law & In the beginning there was teenage son Tyler are settling into a Shah in his towering portrayal of an Order,” “24” and the pilot episode of “The O.C.” “Traffik,” the 1989 British TV drama new home. honest Pakistani peasant whose dig- Comedy show contenders were “Frasier,” “Sex and the City” and two which tracked the passage of heroin Story line 2: Adam Kadyrov (Cliff nity and family are disintegrating. episodes of “Malcolm in the Middle,” while “Late Night with Conan and the lives it ruined along the way, Curtis) plies the streets of Seattle in The star-studded Soderbergh version O’Brien,” “Mad TV,” “Real Time with Bill Maher” and the “Penn & Teller” from Pakistan’s poppy fields to his battered cab. He’s anxiously wait- couldn’t possibly match its authentic urban-legend debunking show made up the nominees for best variety Britain’s ruling classes. Then came ing for his wife and daughter to feel. In this regard, at least, the new series writing. 2000’s “Traffic,” Steven Soderbergh’s arrive in a containerload of immi- “Traffic” does better. Three episodes of “The Simpsons” dominated the animation script cate- big-screen version, which transplant- grants. Koteas as loose-cannon McKay gory, accompanied by “King of the Hill,” “The Adventures of Jimmy ed the action to the United States and Story line 3: Ivy League business and Martin Donovan as his by-the- Neutron, Boy Genius” and “Futurama.” Mexico and collected four Oscars. graduate Ben Edmonds (Balthazar book partner breathe crackling life Now cable’s USA Network offers Getty looking rather like Charlie into an otherwise off-the-shelf cop yet another update, a miniseries also Sheen in “Wall Street”) is getting des- pairing. Getty as the young hustler, called “Traffic,” which takes us to perate for the good life. But his big McCormack as the stressed-out DEA Plotting the details: Academy post-9/11 Afghanistan and Seattle and real estate venture and his father’s wife and Nelson Lee as the sinister adds new levels of human wicked- garment business are sliding into immigrant smuggler are persuasive. prepares for ’nominations eve’ ness — terrorism and trafficking in bankruptcy. Justin Chatwin and Jennifer Rae illegal immigrants. Bodies start surfacing in Puget Westley make a watchable, poignant BEVERLY HILLS, Calif. (AP) — Then squads of publicists, man- Despite being a retread of a Sound with bullet wounds in their teen couple. 5:38:30 a.m. — that’s the moment agers, agents and stylists will scram- retread, it works pretty well. necks — Kadyrov’s wife and child Although the edifice of interwoven Hollywood hype turns hyperactive. ble to get the nominees: a) attention, Like its predecessors, the version are among them. The DEA’s McKay story lines seems to weaken some- It’s the precise time Tuesday b) better scripts, c) bigger money airing in two-hour chapters Monday embarks on mysterious business of what near the end, the two central morning when the 76th annual and d) new outfits flashy enough to through Wednesday (9 p.m. EST) his own, raising suspicions back at mysteries — McKay’s one-man mis- Academy Award nominations will make People magazine, yet subdued depends on its ability to weave headquarters that he has “jumped sion and those bodies in Puget Sound be announced to the world, creat- enough to dodge snarking from E! together disparate lives and cultures: the rails.” And Edmonds succumbs to — sustain themselves to a satisfying ing a frenzy among all who make carpet maven Joan Rivers. the lawlessness of Afghanistan and his greed and becomes ensnared in resolution. movies, make money from movies Back at the studios, marketing the comforts of suburban Seattle; the the immigrant business. And be warned: The violence and or make time to see movies. executives will relaunch months- glistening Seattle skyline and its Now, here’s the problem: how corpses are graphic. Almost a week before the clamor, old movies with ad campaigns tout- drug-addled derelicts; a bankrupt many times can you recycle the The previous versions of this story a small army of behind-the-scenes ing their nominations in a bid to garment factory and a moneymaking same themes (that drugs kill the were brave enough not to preach or men and women met in a shadowy spin hot Oscar buzz into cold box- immigrant-smuggling business; a innocent, that we are all vulnerable, contrive happy endings. They left us theater on the third floor of the office cash. Chechen immigrant cab driver build- and that the war on drugs — surprise, in no doubt that all the bad things that Academy of Motion Picture Arts And it all starts at the Academy. ing his own American dream; a teen surprise — is futile)? These ideas felt have happened will happen again, and Sciences headquarters to plot On Wednesday afternoon, about 40 romance with the girl next door. new when “Traffik” first aired. Two and that the best we can hope for is to the details of “nominations eve.” staffers gathered for a read- All are tied together by drugs, the versions later, they might be consid- slow their advance. To its credit, the As the contenders are through that outlined where traffic in immigrants, and worse. ered a bit stale, yet they’re still pow- “Traffic” premiering this week also announced, big-time actors will employees should be and what Story line 1: Mike McKay (Elias erful enough to keep the viewer on refuses to force-feed us with easy eye the live television broadcast, they’ll be doing prior to the nomi- Koteas) is a DEA field agent. He’s edge. answers. hungry to hear their own names. nations.

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By the Associated Press ent Coca-Cola to transform the stu- Shadow" and "Sylvester." He was to merge with another agency Goodbye Girl," "The Cheap dio. He was an odd choice: a named breeder of the year two owned by Ted Ashley, Stark part- Detective," "Chapter Two," Ray Stark, one of the most Hollywood outsider who had been years running in 1982 and 1983 by nered with Eliot Hyman to create "Murder by Death" and "Biloxi forceful producers of the modern a vociferous critic of the the California Thoroughbred Seven Arts Prods. In 1961, Stark Blues." era, and an eminence grise behind American film industry while in Breeders Assn. produced his first independent He first came across Streisand the scenes of Hollywood for the his native Great Britain. Stark was in some ways a mass feature, "The World of Suzie when he was making the stage better part of the last four As soon as he came to of contradictions: a registered Wong." He supervised more than musical "Funny Girl." The produc- decades, died early Saturday after Hollywood, Puttnam found him- Democrat who befriended both 50 feature films, such as "West tion was a labor of love for Stark, a long illness. He was 88. self both courted and manipulated blacklisted directors like Martin Side Story," "Anatomy of a since it told the life story of his Stark was in some ways the by Stark. When he refused to kow- Ritt and Ronald and Nancy Murder," "The Misfits," "The mother-in-law, Brice. But Stark archetypal showman of the era tow to Stark, according to biogra- Reagan; a showman who seemed Roman Spring of Mrs. Stone," couldn't seem to cast the main after the collapse of the "factory pher Andrew Yule, Puttnam quick- the very epitome of old-school "Lolita," "Two for the Seesaw" and part. Reigning divas Carol system" and one of the key pur- ly found Stark working against Hollywood, who could nonetheless "Seven Days in May," while pro- Channing and Carol Burnett did veyors of filmed entertainment him with the Coca-Cola board. make such cutting-edge television ducing two films directed by John not seem quite right; Anne from the late 1950s through the After a series of boxoffice fail- product as HBO's "Barbarians at Huston: "Night of the Iguana" Bancroft and Judy Garland had 1990s. His skills as a producer ures, Puttnam was forced to the Gate"; and an immensely loyal (1964), which starred Richard turned the part down; and Edie earned him the Irving Thalberg resign. friend who could still be ruthless Burton, Ava Gardner and Deborah Gorme only wanted to star if her Award from the Academy of Stark's behavior could run the when dealing with anyone he con- Kerr, and "Reflections in a Golden husband, Steve Lawrence, was in Motion Picture Arts & Sciences. gamut from flamboyant generosi- sidered an enemy. Eye" (1967), which starred Marlon the cast. He helped turn actors like Julia ty to aggrieved carping. On one His was a charmed life, but not Brando and Elizabeth Taylor. In despair, Stark went out one Roberts ("Steel Magnolias") and occasion, he took out full-page ads without its difficulties. The 1970 It was the beginning of a four- evening to the Bon Soir club in Barbra Streisand ("Funny Girl") in both The Hollywood Reporter suicide of his only son, Peter, at the decade career that would see him New York and there saw into stars and had a gift for mak- and Daily Variety lambasting the age of 25, was devastating to receive accolades like the Streisand. While Stark's wife, ing slick, well-crafted Hollywood press for publishing unspecified Stark, who responded with charac- Thalberg Award, the Producers Fran, initially rebelled against the films, ranging from "California innuendos -- an interesting move teristic generosity in funding the Guild's David O. Selznick Award Streisand casting, what followed Suite" to "Annie" to "The Goodbye for a one-time newsman who USC's Peter Stark Producers and several Golden Globes, though was two months on the road as the Girl." Often, these films were entered the studio world as a pub- Program. And the 1992 loss of he was always thwarted in his neophyte actress worked with directed by veterans like John licist. Stark's wife of 53 years, Frances desire to win a best picture Oscar. directors Bob Fosse and Garson Huston, Sydney Pollack and Another time, he hired a former Arnstein, daughter of the vaude- Along the way, he made such Kanin, before Jerome Robbins Herbert Ross -- the filmmakers of Village Voice columnist to develop ville comedian Fanny Brice, was well-known films "Summer took over and the play became a whom Stark was most fond. a slash-and-burn movie about film also a terrible blow. Wishes, Winter Dreams," "Smokey Broadway smash. When Streisand But Stark was also a political critics after many of them had Born in 1917, Raymond Otto and the Bandit," "The Toy," "Blue played the role in the Columbia player with an enormous relish for slaughtered his pet project Stark went to Rutgers University, Thunder," "The Electric film (against the studio's wishes, behind-the-scenes maneuvering, "Annie." dropping out to study law at New Horseman," "Revenge," "Steel needless to say), she not only won which once led a colleague to com- But he could also be a man of York University while working a Magnolias," "Peggy Sue Got a best actress Oscar, she also got pare him with the great French enormous charm and considerate- late shift as a copy boy with the Married," "Nothing in Common" her producer a nomination for political figure Cardinal Richelieu. ness, showering gifts on acquain- New York Journal-American. and "Random Hearts." best picture. In a rare profile of Stark, Aljean tances and friends alike. Well after He abandoned both journalism He made eight pictures with Streisand subsequently worked Harmitz of the New York Times one of his favorite directors had and the law when he moved to Herbert Ross, five with Sydney with Stark on "The Owl and the wrote: "His wit is legendary, and died, he continued to help the Hollywood in 1938, initially taking Pollack and made multiple movies Pussycat," "The Way We Were," even his enemies describe him as man's widow, spontaneously send- a job as a florist at the Forest Lawn with actors like Jackie Gleason, "For Pete's Sake" and "Funny 'brilliant' and 'charming,' but the ing her an answering machine on cemetery, then serving in the Sean Connery, Robert Redford, Lady." word most often attached to his one occasion when he discovered Warner Bros. publicity depart- Walter Matthau, Richard Dreyfuss Toward the end of his life, Stark name is 'Byzantine.' " that she had no telephone service ment and as West Coast editor for and Jane Fonda. had become somewhat less active, Nowhere was this clearer than of her own. Fawcett Publications. Not all of these relationships hindered by poor health and had in the machinations surrounding Stark's interests ranged beyond In 1940, Stark shifted gears to were straightforward. James teamed with other producers, the rise and fall of two Columbia Hollywood to an impressive art become an agent with the Irving Bridges, the director of "The China including Dan Melnick and his Pictures chieftains, David collection that included works by Salkow Agency. Over the years, he Syndrome," said his two experi- son-in-law, John Morrissey. But Begelman and David Puttnam. Henry Moore, Giacometti and would go from one agency to ences with Stark were "crazed," the success of "Barbarians" and After Begelman -- a charming Magritte, which he would fre- another, gathering clout and while Harmitz reported that both the star wattage involved in former agent who had become quently show visitors to his lavish clients. In 1946, he formed the Redford and Pollack "insisted on "Random Hearts," along with his head of Columbia -- embezzled Holmby Hills, Calif., home, once Levee-Stark Agency. Three years contracts that would keep him involvement in Columbia's money from the studio in which owned by Humphrey Bogart. later, he joined Famous Artists from taking away their creative "Houdini," proved that he could Stark was a major shareholder, Several of his paintings have been Agency, where he remained until control" on "The Electric remain a force right to the end. Stark tried to take over the studio, bequeathed to the Los Angeles he became a movie executive in Horseman." "Both felt so battered Stark was both loved and then conspired to oust a whole County Museum of Art, of which 1957. after 'The Way We Were' that they reviled, admired and feared. But series of executives who weren't he was a trustee. While an agent, Stark represent- never wanted to work for him perhaps those are the qualities in favor with him, from Alan He also invested in prizewin- ed or worked closely with such again," Harmitz wrote. that make a great producer. He Hirschfield to Norman Levy to ning horses, many of them named major names as Lana Turner, Ava And yet, like so many others, was part of a breed that seized the Peter Guber. One executive spoke after his films or acquaintances. Gardner, Marilyn Monroe, William they did. As one of them said, he opportunity to put their stamp on of the "shadow government" Stark Thus "The World of Suzie Wong" Holden, Richard Burton, Kirk simply had the best material and a the filmmaking world after titans ran at Columbia at the time. was not only the name of the first Douglas and others -- several of wonderful way of getting it to the like Louis B. Mayer and Sam Stark was also deeply involved picture Stark produced, but a whom would star in his future film screen. Goldwyn had disappeared from in the histrionics surrounding cherished filly; and Margaret productions. Perhaps Stark's two most impor- the scene. And he did so not Puttnam's brief regime more than Booth, the film editor, became He also represented such top- tant relationships were with play- briefly but with a longevity and a decade later. The producer of Margaret Booth, a favorite horse. notch writers as Raymond wright Neil Simon and Streisand. consistent success that remain films like "Midnight Express" and Stark even took his passion for Chandler and Ben Hecht. Stark made 11 movies with almost unparalleled in modern "Chariots of Fire," Puttnam had horses to the movies, with two After failing to persuade Simon, among them "California Hollywood. been brought in by Columbia par- horse-themed features, "Casey's Famous Artists' Charlie Feldman Suite," "The Sunshine Boys," "The Its Time!

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Questions? Please call: 581-2812 8B ON THE VERGE OF THE WEEKEND ◆ THE DAILY EASTERN NEWS Friday, January 23, 2004 Horror titans cover tepid script with DVD extras By Ben Erwin Horror is typically the prover- “WWE: Originals,” fares far too seriously. ciency is ultimately obfuscated by STAFF WRITER bial redheaded stepchild of cine- worse as wrestlers provide “Originals” can’t be taken as lame retreads from every SoCal ma, but this film is given the royal “vocals” on 17 tracks that can only anything more than it is: a mar- punk band or D.C. emo outfit. Following over two decades of treatment with Dolby 5.1 surround be described as mixed, at best. keting ploy to cash in on wrestling Even soften numbers that show a terror and covering nearly 20 sound, anamorphic widescreen I’m a fan of “sports entertain- fans via marginal performances little promise, like “Blur” and films, Freddy Krueger and Jason format and beautiful color satura- ment” and deep down I wanted to that are much sillier than they are “Dear You (Far Away),” still sound Voorhees – the men collectively tion. find some nugget of worth on this stellar. like Incubus B-sides. responsible for terrorizing Elm All of the extras are fascinating . But it simply makes any Derivative isn’t a bad term, but Street and Camp Crystal Lake or entertaining,, and the set was listener long for the days of when nothing about a band distin- respectively – finally received the obviously created with hardcore celebrity singers like Don guishes it from contemporaries or opportunity to face off in a final, fans in mind but is pieced together Johnson, Eddie Murphy, Rick even influences, a clear problem monolithic battle in “Freddy Vs. simply enough for horror neo- Springfield or damn near anyone arises. Lead singer Jason.” phytes as well. The mythology and else. This proves once and for all sounds like a mix of Brandon Boyd Made for a scant $30 million, history of both films are treated no wrestler should ever quit his or and almost every pseudo-punk this New Line Cinema’s horror gamble with reverence as well as healthy her day job. side of Pennywise and Bad paid off, as the film not only turned sense of humor, while enveloping Comprised of 17 tracks, Religion. Again, not that it’s the a bigger profit than any film in the viewing in a fanciful yet gory “Originals” spans the gamut of worst thing in the world, but either franchise, but breathed new universe. pathetically poor rapping, holds few distinguish- life into the ailing slasher genre. Horror fans have been salivat- mediocre blue-eyed soul, a little ing characteristics. New Line’s double-disc gives fans ing for this film since 1984 and the tepid rock and a few tracks that “MFZB” rises above its own of “Friday the 13th” and “A subsequent DVD is appropriately have no business seeing the light self-imposed mediocrity on Nightmare on Elm Street” series a lush and sure to sate them. Soaked of day. If the primary lesson of melody laced tracks like the har- beautiful presentation of a some- in blood and dripping with mythol- “Originals is to not quit one’s day mony heavy “Hello Today” and the what disappointing film. ogy, “Freddy Vs. Jason” finally job, the second lesson is that “WWE: Originals” head-bobbing “Over the Edge,” The story here is relatively honors horror fans with a DVD thick-necked honkeys have Various Artists but this does little to save a thor- unimportant. It’s the two icons who befitting their devotion and love of absolutely no business rapping. Grade: D oughly bland album. Nothing on count in this film. After years in a the genre. EVER. “MFZB” sets Zebrahead apart purgatory, Krueger (Robert The hip hop tracks like The from the endless slew of hybrid Englund) resurrects Voorhees Dudley Boyz’s “We’ve Had bands being signed to labels every (Ken Kirzinger) via a nightmare to Enough,” Booker T’s “Can You Dig Zebrahead returns with month hoping to make a quick rekindle memory of Krueger’s for- It?” and John Cena’s “Basic buck on being no better than thor- mer Elm Street carnage. When Thugonomics” are all laughable to mediocre, uninspired oughly mediocre and utterly unim- Voorhees refuses to return to pointless at best. More rocking cookie cutter rock pressive. Crystal Lake, however, the scene is tunes fare a little better. Lita And it’s not as though Zebrahead set for one of the biggest standoffs sounds as though she’s channeling By Ben Erwin isn’t trying its damnedest. Rating in cinema history. the spirit of Liz Phair on “When I STAFF WRITER this band is a lot like scolding a Any remaining plot points or Get You Alone.” “Stone Cold” puppy who accidentally peed on a character traits beyond this point Steve Austin’s interludes may be Somewhere there’s a music prized rug; it’s not as if he meant to are inconsequential or simply silly, but they’re not nearly as executive at Sony maniacally make a bothersome mess, he just cliché. There’s a requisite female cringe-inducing as the rest of the stamping out tepid rap-rock with a didn’t know any better. Zebrahead heroine, a “nerd” who dies a hero, a record. giant steel cookie cutter fitted shows a morsel of promise, but it’s few wry Krueger one-liners and a It’s no surprise Chris Jericho with the requisite backwards ultimately obscured by badly liberal dose of drunken, carousing actually gives the best and most white baseball cap, lame Chinese placed clichés. teenagers marked for death. It’s convincing performance on the symbol tattoos, prefaded jeans and formulaic but effective. metallic “Don’t You Wish You surly middle-class attitude. That Despite a lackluster script and Were Me?” on which he simply man desperately needs to be broadly stroked characters, the gives the same performance he’s stopped. film makes many subtle nods back “Freddy Vs. Jason” given on the album’s of his real Zebrahead’s latest, “MFZB,” is to both franchises while creating a Director Ronny Yu band, Fozzy. just another in a long line of thor- unique mythology encompassing Grade: B The performances may be sub- oughly mediocre, unimpressive both horror characters’ legends. par, but the production, as it is on drivel churned out by greedy The plot leaves something to be most of WWE’s theme music and record executives far too lazy to desired, but references to the past ‘Originals’ awful in entrance themes, is excellent. The seek out new and viable musical like Krueger morphing through guitar riffs may be trite, the talent. Sure, on the surface boiler metal, the use of hypnocil every possible way basslines may be a little tepid and Zebrahead has all the prerequi- and the style of deaths proves New the beats are cookie cutter, but sites of stardom– good job master- Line’s heart was ultimately in the By Ben Erwin some of the music still sounds ing drop-D tuning, a couple basic right place. STAFF WRITER much better than a lot of pop pentatonic scales and whiteboy The DVD set offers insightful, records currently being made. angst Zebrahead – but “MFZB” entertaining commentary, 19 delet- World Wrestling Entertainment WWE has tried this sort of pitch only drops into pitfalls of trite ed scenes and a slew of featurettes releases like 2001’s “Forcible before and it didn’t work then. It lyrics, uninspired hooks and a lit- offering a peek into how and why Entry” may have reached the top should be no surprise even to tle too much fratboy bravado. “MFZB” the film was made. New Line is of the charts courtesy of tunes wrestling fans that it wouldn’t Rocking numbers like “Into Zebrahead known for elaborate DVD pack- from the likes of Creed, Limp work this time. If nothing else, You,” “Falling Apart” and “Type ages and “Freddy Vs. Jason” is Bizkit and Motorhead, the compa- “Originals” proves that even A” are all formed around catchy Grade: C among the best of them. ny’s latest release. The aptly titled wrestlers don’t take themselves guitar lines, but any musical profi- CONCERT CALENDAR January 23 January 24 Ridding rooms of unwanted mates ◆ ◆ Reverend Sullen and January 27 ◆ It’s the middle of the school year, and roommate has company. Even if you Robert Saltwater Life st Sea your roommates may have shown them- have a perfect physique, unabashed pub- 8 p.m. Jackson Vampires Metro, $2 8:30 Ave. Coffee Friends & Co. p.m. selves to be quite different from the cool lic nudity invades the comfort zones of $3 people you signed a lease with. By Holly Henschen most anyone. When your roommate ◆ Rural Kings Roommates that eat your food, drink ASSOCIATE VERGE EDITOR protests, claim nudity is an aspect of with The ◆ Rushlow your booze, don’t pay their share of the your newfound religion. Call your room- Rumbleshack Canopy Club bills, never leave, have late night parties mate a Communist for trying to infringe Orchestra $15 on the eve of your big exam or just plain are in. You’re supposed to call there or go upon you constitutional rights as an Friends & Co. aggravate you (italics)cannot(italics) be in (italics)immediately(italics).” This American. $3 January 26 tolerated. To ensure yourself a better will raise questions about your room- ◆ Twista spring semester, follow these guidelines mate’s fidelity and hygiene, regardless ◆Hit on your roommate. Remark how ◆ X-Krush House of Blues and you will be annoying-roommate-free of whether they can explain it to the drafty the place has been lately and Canopy Club 9 10 p.m. in no time. third party. Should your roommate extend an offer for him or her to crawl p.m. $5 cover $20 accuse you of sabotage, act innocent. into bed with you if it gets too cold Disclaimer: As a firm believer in Say, “It must have been some kind of tonight. Note: if this one backfires, you ◆Superdiamond ◆ The karma, I recommend these suggestions mix-up. I’m just trying to look out for could be in real trouble. w/ member’s Appleseed Cast, only be followed if absolutely necessary, (italics)you(italics), man.” only, Chicago Cougars, Chin when your roommate’s behavior has ◆Take all the food items in the kitchen House of Blues Up Chin Up warranted such action. These activities ◆Construct a makeshift shrine to and arrange them in stacks on the count- 9 p.m. $18.50 Metro 9 p.m. $10 are sure to annoy your roommate, which Satan in the living room coincidentally er tops. When your roommate asks ◆ may make him or her more unbearable if before your roommate’ s parents visit. what’s going on, proudly proclaim, “I’m Burn Rome Burn ◆ The Junior they don’t move out. Also, you may be When they arrive, they will demand an Pharaoh of the Food Pyramids!” Then Metro 9 p.m. Varsity, stuck with extra bills or the responsibili- explanation. Nonchalantly attribute hum “Walk Like an Egyptian” by The $8 Glasseater ty of finding a new roommate when your your allegiance to the Dark Lord as a Bangles for a week or so whenever you Metro, 6:30 p.m. plan succeeds. new avenue in your quest for self-dis- cross paths. $7 covery. Tell them you’ve also been doing ◆Every time you see your roommate, extensive research on human sacrifice. ◆If the roommate leaves for a week- ask for a handout. Nothing gets under Mom and Dad won’t want their precious end, rearrange the furniture in his or her someone’s skin like a total mooch. When baby subject to such madness, and may room. When your roommate returns, a “Could I get a ride?” and “Can I bum a insist the roommate move out immedi- very surprised reaction will ensure your smoke?” gets repetitive, try bizarre ately. claim of innocence. Tell your roommate requests like, “Can I use your tooth- that you met someone at a party over the brush? I lost mine,” or “I’m out of under- ◆Call the Department of Homeland weekend who used to live in your place wear, do you have an extra pair I can bor- Security. Report your roommate has last year, and he had suspicions that it row? I’ll wash them before I give them been engaging in suspicious terrorist was haunted. Ask if he or she has ever back, I promise.” Note: if they are actu- activity. Construct an elaborate story seen the movie “Poltergeist.” ally dumb enough to let you borrow involving his constant reading of “The them, don’t wash the underwear before Anarchist’s Cookbook” and wondering If this doesn’t force your roommate to you return them. aloud what George W. Bush would look move out, it will make him think he’s like in a turban. (This is illegal and for going mad and/or force him to doubt his ◆Call your roomie’s significant other entertainment purposes only.) own sanity. In any case, he should want or crush and ask for your roommate to spend less time in your house. when you are sure he or she is in class or ◆Begin a practice of jaunting around If your roommate starts doing crazy at work. Leave this message: “Health the house/apartment/dorm room in the things like this to you, maybe you should Service called and your STD test results buff. This is especially effective if the move out.