Refreshed SD 02.16.Indd
February 2016
Real life. Real community.
Tactical mission Former Navy SEAL brings passion to men’s ministry
Renewed vision New YFC director seeks to revitalize teen program
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rrefreshedsandiego.comefreshedsandiego.com S Sanan DDiego’siego’s iinspirationalnspirational llifestyleifestyle nnewspaperewspaper in plain sight DEAN NELSON “I was unwanted, a loser.” At that point, Robin Jones Gunn felt about as low as possible. From fi bs to fulfi llment
She thought she wanted to be a mis- them, in a Yoda-like manner, was happy Robin wrote her fi rst novel by taking Robin started other book series, too. sionary, but the missions organization to hear it. a chapter each Sunday for the Sunday The books have sold more than fi ve mil- denied her application. In its kindest “Good,” the girl said. “We don’t want School class to read. lion copies. choice of words possible, it said that her you to leave. We want you to stay here. “They told me everything I did wrong A gift that she had from the very be- skills weren’t a “suffi cient match” for We think you should fi nd a job telling and everything I needed to change, ginning, one that originally caused her their purposes. stories. We love it when you tell stories.” including the characters’ names,” she embarrassment, turned into something It wasn’t like she had applied for a The problem was that Robin didn’t wrote. much bigger than she could imagine. leadership position. She wasn’t asking to WANT to tell stories. Telling stories The result was a novel about a girl From the very start she was “suffi cient.” be director, worship leader, preacher. The always got her in trouble when she was named Christy Miller and her boyfriend She just needed some girls to help her job she was applying for was—wait for little. Teachers had a word for her sto- Todd. The response of the girls was that realize it. it—“Laundry Supervisor.” But her skills ries. They called it “lying.” There was they wanted more stories. Do you think that maybe you’re al- weren’t “suffi cient.” She received this nothing special about telling stories. “We need more role models like ready equipped to participate in what message just a little while after her fi ancé “I put aside all hopes of traveling to Christy and Todd and the rest of the God is doing in the world? My guess is told her he didn’t want to marry her. unknown corners of the world, and for gang,” they told her. “You tell us things that you are. And that’s no lie. “I was unwanted,” she wrote later. “A the next 10 years I lived the life that had about God when you teach, but when Robin Jones Gunn will be speaking at 7 loser. No one wanted to marry me, and been given to me,” she wrote. you write about them in a story, we re- p.m. at Point Loma Nazarene University on now I couldn’t even wash clothes for Je- One day when she and her husband member them. Your stories change us on Feb. 17 as part of the annual Writer’s Sympo- sus in Africa.” were on a camping trip with the girls in the inside.” sium by the Sea. Tickets are at www.pointloma. At that point, Robin Jones Gunn felt their church youth group, she found sever- The encouragement from the girls edu/writers, or call (619) 849-2695. about as low as possible. al girls in one of the tents on a sunny af- kept her going. So did a Bible verse that She decided to get on with her life, ternoon. They were reading. But the books Robin claimed as a message from God. It though, fi guring she needed to fi t in, they were reading made Robin cringe. was Psalm 102:18: “Let this be written Dean Nelson directs the conform, live a normal life. “Read something else,” she begged for a future generation, that a people journalism program at Point She kept teaching her Sunday School them. not yet created may praise the Lord.” Loma Nazarene University in class of middle school girls. They knew The trouble was that there wasn’t That fi rst Christy Miller book led to San Diego. His book about about her desire to be a missionary. She much for that age group that was posi- another one. Then another, then an- seeing God in everyday life had told them all about it, and they were tive and uplifting. The girls challenged other, as Christy went through middle is “God Hides in Plain Sight: her Greek chorus, cheering her on. When Robin. “Why don’t you write some books school, then high school, then college, How to See the Sacred in a she gave them the bad news, one of for us?” they asked. “We’ll help you.” then got married. Chaotic World.”
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2 REFRESHED | February 2016 Car crash kills Carlsbad missionary in Africa
CARLSBAD — Daybreak Church has for my future but I know He holds me and The Cowies worked launched an online crowdfunding account guides me,” she wrote. “For now I will re- with numerous ministries for the widow of one of their missionaries, main in (South Africa) as these were my in South Africa, includ- who was killed in a car crash in early De- last marching orders from my Father and ing Monte Cristo Minis- cember while ministering in South Africa. I still believe I have work to do here. I have tries, the Andrew Murray Reg Cowie, who was serving in South lost my husband, but not my faith nor de- Center and most recently Africa with his wife Nancy, was traveling on sire to serve my Lord. No big decisions for Hope Prison Ministry in a two-lane road while on his way to min- now—where God leads from here I will fol- Wellington. Their fi rst as- ister to prisoners at the time of the crash. low, missing my Reg every step of the way.” signment was as the wait He was 56. Reg Cowie had deep roots in South staff at a ministry coffee Reg and Nancy Cowie served as missionaries in South Africa for 10 years. Reg The Cowies, who were married in 1998 Africa. His great-great grandfather shop and working with Cowie was killed in a car crash in December on his way to minister to prisoners. after meeting at a university in Tucson, was Carl Preller, the fi rst mayor of Preto- children in an after-school Arizona, were longtime members of Day- ria. Cowie’s parents also served in South program. his family. “He will be remembered as a break. They joined the church after relocat- Africa. Following in their footsteps, the But Cowie loved discipling men and his man with a bright smile and a twinkle in ing to Carlsbad after their wedding. Nancy couple had been serving in South Africa for outlet for that was prison ministry, sup- his eyes…a man who stopped and prayed served on the pastoral staff at Daybreak for 10 years after leaving their jobs when they porting the work of Restorative Justice, immediately for anyone who had a problem seven years. They also helped to build the were each 47. which challenges inmates to take respon- or concern. He went out of his way to care congregation’s fi rst building. According to Nancy, her husband often sibility for their actions, and Staying Well, for the unlovable in prisons.” In a letter to the congregation Nancy said “I was born in America, but I choose to which serves the needs of correctional of- Cowie said she and her husband’s fam- be South African.” fi cers. More information on the fundraiser can be ily were overwhelmed by the support they More than 400 people turned out for his “Reg was at the height of his life calling found at www.youcaring.com or by sending an were receiving. three-hour memorial service in South Af- and in the country he loved, with the wom- email to Dr. Lauren Jefferis, the Daybreak liai- “I don’t know what God has in store rica. an he loved,” read an obituary prepared by son, at [email protected].
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Foothills Christian High School &T[FGP4QCF'N%CLQP (QTKPHQTOCVKQP ŰHQQVJKNNUUEJQQNPGVHEJU VOLUME 3 | NUMBER 2 PUBLISHERS Lamar & Theresa Keener EDITOR Lori Arnold PROOFREADER Lis Trouten AD SALES Lamar Keener CONTRIBUTORS Joanne Brokaw, Michael Foust, Daniel Jenkins, Dean Nelson, Janice Thompson, Copyright © 2016 Selah Media Group Refreshed is an in de pen dent, faith-based newspaper pub lished monthly by Selah Media Group. It is distributed in bulk, free of charge, to hundreds of locations throughout San Diego County. For a 1-year mail subscription, send $24.95 to the address We invite prospective students and their Ű 9#5%CEETGFKVGF below or visit refreshedmag.com. parents to call to arrange a visit to our Ű $KDNKECNN[DCUGFCECFGOKEUVCWIJVHTQOC%JTKUVKCP Refreshed welcomes story ideas. All unsolicited material is worldview subject to approval of the publishers and is not returned. campus. Plan now for the 2016-2017 school Ű %QNNGIGRTGREWTTKEWNWO Viewpoints expressed in Refreshed are those of their year — or inquire about an immediate opening. respective writers, and are not necessarily held by the Ű 5OCNNENCUUGUYKVJNQYUVWFGPVVQVGCEJGTTCVKQU publishers. Ű 7RVQFCVGEQORWVGTNCD Reasonable effort is made to screen advertisers, but no Ű /WUKEVJGCVTGCPFCTVRTQITCOU endorsement of the publishers is implied or should be inferred. The publishers can accept no responsibility for the products or Ű %+(URQTVU services offered through adver tise ments. The publisher reserves Ű 7%CPF0%##CRRTQXGFEQWTUGU the right to refuse any ad vertis ing. Ű 5GTXKEGQRRQTVWPKVKGU ADDRESS ALL CORRESPONDENCE TO: Ű #HHQTFCDNGVWKVKQPQHHGTKPICPFFC[RTQITCOU P. O. Box 2606, El Cajon, CA 92021 Ű (KPCPEKCNCKFCXCKNCDNG E-MAIL [email protected] Ű 'CTN[TGIKUVTCVKQPFKUEQWPV PHONE/FAX (619) 567-7811 AD SALES (619) 567-7811
February 2016 | REFRESHED 3 Tactical mission
Former Navy SEAL brings passion to men’s ministry story by LORI ARNOLD photos by KEVIN MCGREW PHOTOGRAPHY
eff Bramstedt was working out at a Bramstedt listened with cool detach- “I was in college and hating it like ev- stand spiritual warfare.” local gym as part of an intense regi- ment. He was enjoying his elite, but ery 19 year old,” he said of his pre-enlist- * * * Jmen to keep himself fi t for service as a spontaneous, Navy experience too much ment days. Quickly assessing his spiritual life, Navy SEAL when a stranger tentatively ap- to even consider what the man in front of But then his younger brother called. Bramstedt decided it didn’t match the proached him. him was saying. He had just signed up with the Navy after bold words of this stranger so, exercis- “He said, ‘I know that God has some- graduating from high school. * * * ing the same confi dence he displayed in thing very unique and special but I’m “He said, ‘Hey man, there’s this group As a young adult, Bramstedt hadn’t SEAL training, Bramstedt told the man apprehensive to talk to you about it be- of guys in the Navy and they do every- that he had no interest in Hollywood or given much thought to the military as a cause you look a little intense.” thing we did as kids, only it’s legal,”’ speaking in public. career option. That intensity was part personality, Bramstedt said, laughing and recalling The man politely said OK and walked part training. By that time, Bramstedt his childhood penchant for playing with away. As Bramstedt later discovered, had already completed his third deploy- fi re, blowing things up (including his GI though, the battle was not over. As it ment. Joes), and dismantling fi recrackers. turned out, his workout partner had “I wasn’t that approachable,” Bramst- “Before you knew it I was in SEAL given Bramstedt’s phone number to the edt said of the 1997 incident. “I was that training,” he said. man, Greg Wark. At the time, Wark was guy (who) every single person that walks The grueling training resulted in just a San Diego-based pastor, counselor and up to me I know everything about them 23 graduates out of an original class of chaplain. as they get close to me. I know if they 143. Just 16 percent succeeded. Apparently the intense demeanor know how to fi ght. I can tell by how they Then there was the matter of faith. that caused Wark to proceed cautiously walk. I can tell where their head is at. I Bramstedt, adopted at six months by a with Bramstedt at the gym didn’t trans- can tell if they are a force to be reckoned young Lutheran pastor and his wife, was mit through the telephone. Wark began with or if they are going to be easy to raised as a Christian but never really pur- calling him two to three times a week. walk through. Everybody is an adversary. sued Jesus on his own. (His father later He interrupted parties. He often called Everybody, before they prove themselves left the pastorate to support his family as as Bramstedt was using his “targeting” different. That’s the headspace I was in.” a mechanic). skills to chase women. Bramstedt told Seeing that Bramstedt wasn’t going to “There was a miss in there somehow,” Wark that he was infringing on his style. rip apart his limbs, the stranger contin- he said. “I knew who Jesus was. I knew “Three months later things in my ued. about the Holy Spirit. I understood the life started circling the drain enough to “God is going to use you in the fi lm Trinity. I didn’t understand destiny and where I started to feel it was time for me industry,” the man said. “He’s going to I defi nitely didn’t understand the enemy, to call this guy back and pick up what he give you a platform in the fi lm industry and part of getting through everything was putting down,” the former SEAL said. to reach literally thousands of people. He you got to get through in life is know- “I haven’t looked back since.” is also going to give you a voice. You are ing that in your battle space is another Wark mentored his new convert and going to be able to stand in front of mil- Former Navy SEAL Jeff Bramstedt uses his experiences side to this thing. There is an enemy who Bramstedt seemed to thrive and began lions of people sharing the gospel.” for Life of Valor, a ministry he founded to build up men. defi nitely wants you dead. I didn’t under- helping his spiritual dad with Force, the
4 REFRESHED | February 2016 pastor and chaplain’s military outreach. ty,” he said. ents, there was anger toward his biological life—it seemed like all of a sudden every- In true SEAL fashion, Bramstedt pressed mother that he hadn’t acknowledged. thing started falling into place. Hollywood calling on, or so he thought. Four years later he “It was as if God was showing me what “It was as though God was saying that A year after his conversion to Christian- came face to face with demons he didn’t was really happening,” said Bramstedt, the ‘rejection is the red carpet that the enemy ity, Collins received an unlikely phone call even know were there. father of three. will use to roll all this bad stuff into your from Hollywood seeking his particular skill “I woke up one morning and felt like life. Stinking thinking, and bad behavior set as a stunt double for a movie about a a thousand pounds was on my chest,” Deep digging and anger. All this stuff is present because Navy diver. After securing permission from Bramstedt said. “I literally couldn’t breathe His counselor helped him to process the you are trying fi x something that only I his commanding offi cer, Bramstedt said he and it was hard for me to get out of bed.” truth: his biological mother had shunned have the keys to fi x.’” spent four days as Cuba Gooding Jr.’s stunt Also concerned about his lack of focus, pressure to abort her pregnancy and, by A week after the intense counseling double in the 2000 fi lm “Men of Honor.” and steeled by his steadfast resolution not putting her son up for adoption, she had session, Bramstedt receive another unex- Sixteen years later he’s still doing stunt to do “pity parties,” he called his mentor, ensured that her son would be able to es- pected telephone call. This one was from work, with his most recent project expect- Wark. cape the racial tension and broken rela- Jonathan Bock of Grace Hill Media, a Los ed to be showcased with this fall’s release “He said, ‘I’ve been waiting 15 years for tionships of her East St. Louis neighbor- Angeles marketing and production com- of “Deepwater Horizon,” based on the cata- this conversation.’ I’m like, ‘15 years and hood. pany specializing in faith-friendly movies. strophic 2010 BP oil disaster in the Gulf of you couldn’t just tell me then?” Bramstedt “I was still questioning that, and the re- Bock was looking for someone to help Mexico. In a departure from his previous said, a slight chuckle defying his serious jection was still there and then when my write curriculum for Life of Valor, a supple- fi lm work, “Deepwater Horizon” is the fi rst facade. “It’s one of those things where God wife left it made it even worse,” he said. mental Bible study produced in conjunc- movie in which he has a speaking part. has to bring you to a certain place before “I wasn’t any good. I wasn’t healthy. Af- tion with the 2012 release of “Act of Valor,” “You make one stunt coordinator hap- you can deal with it.” ter I forgave my mom—forgave her in the about a covert mission by Navy SEALs to py and you start getting phone calls,” the Wark referred his protégé to a local context that I wasn’t holding something recover a kidnapped intelligence agent. Point Loma resident said. “It’s been an in- counselor and, after three intensive ses- against her, just releasing that out of my Bock also wanted Bramstedt to co-host a teresting evolution, and on top of that be- sions over three days, Bramstedt said he ing out and traveling.” was free of emotional pain, including the The timing of the Hollywood work four years of “seething” he had suppressed proved providential as it fi lled a void after from his wife’s abandonment. Bramstedt was medically discharged from “I had to step back and re-evaluate my the service in 2004. It was also a welcome life,” he said. “The rejection that happened diversion after his wife left him in 2008. at the hands of women just set me off.” “I came home and the house was emp- Although he loved his adoptive par-
One of Life of Valor’s programs includes a three-day Warrior Weekend that includes a day of tactical shooting and closes with a tandem parachuting jump.
Life of Valor: Adventurous gospel Life of Valor offers four distinct pro- with ideas for personal applications they grams, the newest being a daily devo- can use after the event’s conclusion. tional and physical workout. Daily Dose, “The people we want there aren’t nec- or D2, is designed to help men build up essarily the people who would darken the their spiritual and physical endurance. doorstep of a church,” said Life of Valor Participants are encouraged to share their founder Jeff Bramstedt. experiences with the Life of Valor team. Each conference will have its own purpose and what needs to be done to en- Day two is spent learning tactical driv- YouVersion recently featured the fi rst 14 name and theme. sure that your sons and daughters have a fa- ing skills such as the pit maneuver. The editions for 2016. “We don’t want the patrons and partic- ther that is a ‘General,’ not lacking in godly session includes track driving to put the ipants to feel like they are part of a cookie tactics and strategy.” concepts into practice. Single day men’s conferences cutter experience that somebody else in The personal application tips provided The fi nal session on day three is sky- Life of Valor is in the process of de- another town is experiencing the exact for these meetings center on parenting diving under the direction of SEALs and veloping large conference hall or arena same thing,” he said. “They are all going skills and encourage participants to be- several stunt divers. After the ground-lev- events designed to attract thousands. The to be somewhat different.” come spiritually aware of what message el training, participants will fl y to 13,000 fi rst event, scheduled this summer in the their actions are conveying. feet where they will skydive in tandem Philippines, could draw as many as 14,000 Tactical Fatherhood Initiatives with an instructor. to 20,000. Held in the evening, these gatherings Warrior Weekend Adventures “Through this these guys bond togeth- The conferences are described as high- are usually hosted at a church. The Life of Bramstedt and his team of SEALs lead er,” Bramstedt said. “You see guys getting impact gatherings with fastpaced worship Valor website describes them as “not a typi- a group of 15 men in an intensive three- together in one-on-ones and two-on-ones and teaching. The teaching will consist cal conference type event (speakers, bands, day experience. The fi rst day features a where they are really learning about each of comedic moments complemented by boredom, ‘Jesus is my boyfriend’ music, and Tactical Shoot Course in which guests are other and they start talking about some of “TED-style” messages. The events will hand holding). This is a true man’s event. trained in shooting and then spend much the tough stuff men deal with. That has conclude with music by secular bands You will be exposed to real military-style of the day together on the range learn- had a massive impact. made up of Christian believers. The Life courses that will be tied together at the end ing the basics of handgun and rifl e fi ring of Valor team will also present attendees of the event. You will have a true sense of through a variety of drills. Learn more www.lifeofvalor.com.
February 2016 | REFRESHED 5 video promoting the project. stuff. That’s not where my credibility is. “That video got released and it started “My credibility is in this: I hold my hand blowing up,” he said. “That year I was on up and say ‘Who here has been rejected? Preview Day stage 200 times speaking. It really got shot Who here has had anxiety? Who here is out of a cannon. I’m doing exactly what apprehensive and nervous and afraid and at Foothills Christian Middle School Greg prophesied over me that day in the in fear of the future? Who here has been gym. Everything is happening.” divorced? Who here has been abused and After that project concluded, Bramstedt pushed around and discounted and cast Thursday, February 25th acquired the Life of Valor name and web- aside and disregarded? Yeah? Well, OK, 8-11 am site, which he used to start his own military hands have been going up and down this ministry after Wark moved to Nashville. entire time that I’ve been saying these For parents and students things, but my hand has been up the entire entering 6th-8th grades Restoring men time. I’ve lived 65 years in my 45 years of for the 2016-17 school year Launched in 2012, Life of Valor is a being on this planet.’” men’s ministry that offers large single-day ▲ Experience chapel conferences (including one in the Philip- Diving in ▲ Students will “shadow” a current student pines later this year), church-based semi- In early January, Bramstedt realized a nars called Tactical Fatherhood Initiatives long-time dream when he purchased Sky- ▲ Parent informational Q & A session and tour and an intensive three-day Warrior Week- dive San Diego in Jamul, where Life of Valor ▲ Refreshments will be served end Adventure in which a group of 15 or has hosted the parachuting element of its so men spend extended time on a shooting Warrior Weekend program. To register contact the offi ce: 619-303-1641 range, tactical driving course and skydiv- “Where I come from some people call or visit www.fcms.foothillsschool.net/preview-day ing. it crazy, some people call it nuts,” the ad- “It’s a really fun, action-packed week- venturist said. “I call it stepping on out in end,” he said. faith. Doing what I know I’m supposed to What Foothills has to offer While the ministry specializes in adven- be doing, which is calculated and (taking) s Biblically based academics, taught from a tures, Bramstedt said the goal is to point chances, but I call it faith because I’ve been Christian worldview everything back to the life-changing power thinking about it, working on it, praying s Small classes with low student-to-teacher offered through Jesus, a power that goes about it for seven years.” ratio well beyond a salvation experience in an The business not only meshes well with s Hybrid schedule with traditional effort draw men into their full calling. his SEAL experience and the Warrior Week- classroom teaching T-Th, and home “From a state-of-the-union perspective end adventures, but Bramstedt said it will instruction M, F on men, it took us 200-years-plus to get also help to underwrite the growth of Life s Additional tutoring available for students to where we are now… over-comfortable, of Valor as he and his business partner have — Homework Club, Math Club, Friday over-scheduled, over-caffeinated, over- vowed to tithe into the men’s ministry. School medicated, to where we are not (allowing) That means time he would normally have s Extracurricular programs – sports, drama, our children—the next generation of be- to spend fundraising can now be diverted worship team, yearbook lievers, who are going to pick up the mantle back into the ministry’s programming. s Educational Field Trips/Camps – 6th Grade Camp, 350 Cypress Lane, Suite C, El Cajon after us, especially our young boys—to be “Things continue to climb,” he said. Washington DC/East Coast (8th grade only) 619-303-1641 the leaders they are supposed to be,” he “I’m just amazed every day at what God is fcjhs.foothillsschool.net s Affordable tuition said. doing with Life of Valor. It’s literally grow- Compounding the issue, he said, is most ing on its own. But it all happened as a re- men report having few close friends, which sult of me being obedient and doing what results in a barren life without trust, con- God asked—and really, quite frankly, re- fession and accountability. quired me to do. .ATIONALLY RENOWNED DENTIST A key to reversing that trend is building “He requires of all men to get rid of their community, which Bramstedt said he tries junk, to take authority over the stuff that’s to do at each men’s gathering. But building in their heart. The stuff that is holding CHRIS DAVID PATTON, DDS community requires vulnerability. Bramst- them back. The stuff that the enemy has de- edt tries to model this by sharing his own signed and planted so that it can grow and experiences. produce fruit. When you taste that fruit it’s We make “I stand before guys and say my cred- bitter and it’s nasty, and when you eat that ibility isn’t because I have the P-word (for it really impedes on what God has in store, pastor) before my name,” he said. “My what God wants you to do, what God has smiles happen! credibility isn’t in any of my education. My for you. That can affect your destiny. Now credibility isn’t in any of my military ca- what I’m doing is walking men through the Most reer. 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6 REFRESHED | February 2016 Renewed vision New YFC director seeks to revitalize teen program In October of 1951, San Diego Youth for Christ by LORI ARNOLD became an official charter member of the national organization, Youth for Christ.
osh Collier was watching a promotional video, his first created as the new- ex Jecutive director of San Diego Youth for YFC effort to shift toward inner cities Christ. It featured one of the young teens transformed by the ministry’s local out- Once the largest Youth for Christ areas. But youth are moving into the cit- reach. chapter in the United States, the San ies, and into the inner city communities.” “The girl in the video says, ‘I have a pur- Diego ministry has been through ebbs That means the national YFC minis- pose: to inspire, to love, to find kids living and flows over the past decade or so that try is pivoting toward a stronger focus on the darkness I was and to give them a glim- likely would have buried other organi- inner city work. mer of hope,’” Collier, 35, said. zations. But with a rich tradition and “It requires a different approach to The ministry executive, familiar with an alumni list with ties to many of the ministry than we’ve been used to in the the story of transformation, was deeply region’s most high-profile leaders, YFC past,” he said. “The really exciting thing moved, adding that the teenager “described refuses to throw in the towel. is that across the country, Youth for so clearly what excites me about Youth for Last summer its board infused more Christ has been developing really fantas- Christ ministry.” life and hope after hiring Josh Collier tic and relevant inner city youth ministry away from the Tacoma YFC. models.” “Every time I watch that video I get Josh and Latisha Collier with Henry and Lucy. Josh chills when I hear her say that line because Collier is the new executive director for San Diego “There’s quite a legacy of Youth for To accommodate the demographic every time I see a young person in a tough Youth for Christ. Christ ministry in San Diego, and there’s changes, San Diego is now part of Youth place, every time I hear about kids drop- probably people reading this who first for Christ’s Cities Initiative, which will encountered Jesus through a Youth for target the inner city areas of those 35 ping out of foster care, or being homeless, He officially joined the staff just months Christ rally or Campus Life club,” said metro areas. or struggling in poverty or addictions, I after volunteering. Collier, who began his new post on July After his six-month listening tour hear that line and I think, ‘Yes, that’s what Although raised in the church, Collier 1. “So we’re standing on this legacy. with churches, non-profits, and busi- we’re about,’” Collier said. “We’re going to said it wasn’t until he was in high school “For us, in San Diego, we’re really ness leaders, Collier is ready to imple- find every kid living in darkness and give and being mentored by young adults that looking at ourselves as a startup, so I’m ment programming aimed toward at-risk them a glimmer of hope. That’s our fight, his faith became his own. not going to spend a lot of time look- youth. that’s our mission. That’s something worth “(It) just made such a huge difference. ing in the rearview mirror,” he said. “I “What we’ve heard is that there are a giving my life to.” That’s probably part of what got me on the am going to spend a lot of time dream- lot of opportunities among youth whose That life of his changed dramatically path toward youth ministry,” he said, add- ing about how we can reach youth who parents are incarcerated, youth who have over the past year when the Tacoma, Wash- ing, “I love my parents and they’re really today are falling through the cracks in committed a crime and are on probation, ington native accepted the San Diego post. great, but I think that as we transition into our community. So we’ve started with a and pregnant and parenting teens,” he Last summer he and his wife Latisha relo- adulthood we just need these other people posture of listening, learning and find- said. “So we’re evaluating all our current cated their family to Rancho San Diego. to come alongside us and tell us, ‘Hey, this ing collaborative partners. And now that ministry and deciding where we’re called The transition to San Diego was nearly is your identity. This is who God made you we’ve done that, we can use that knowl- to grow.” two years in the making and sparked by an to be. This is the potential you have be- edge to start well, start where the need The programs will include collab- intimate moment during a national YFC cause of God’s work in your life.’” truly is, and build the necessary funding orative efforts to bolster mentoring pro- conference. Collier said Tacoma and San Diego are and leader development components of grams with church volunteers. They also “I was at this conference and I was sing- surprisingly similar in several key areas. sustainable growth.” plan to work alongside other youth-ori- ing that song “Oceans” with the line, ‘Spirit “Tacoma sounds like a small city, and Part of that fact-finding mission was ented ministries. lead me where my trust is without bor- by comparison it certainly is, but the chal- tapping into the latest demograph- “We’ve been talking a lot lately about ders, Let me walk upon the waters, Wher- lenges facing youth are really similar,” he ics that are impacting cities across the what our collaboration will look like as ever You would call me,’ Collier said. “Tears said. “Tacoma is also a major sex trafficking country. YFC grows into new ministry areas,” Col- were coming down my face. I was just pray- hub, has distinct pockets of poverty, youth “Culture has been rapidly changing lier said. “I’ve sometimes heard people ing, ‘God, I’ll do whatever you want me to involved in gangs, drugs, and crime.” around us,” Collier said. “Right now, 65 wonder if there is any competition or in life.’” San Diego, however, has a significantly percent of all young people live in the 35 territorial attitude between groups like About nine months later Collier and his larger refugee population. largest metro areas in America, and that Young Life and Youth for Christ, and I wife, sensing God was preparing them for a “You’re talking about youth who have number is projected to hit 75 percent in would say here in San Diego, absolutely change, took to their knees. come from another culture entirely, and the next decade. And a lot of youth min- not. We’re all on the same mission.” “We prayed for Him to open something then you have many different groups of istry—including YFC ministry—has been if He wanted us to make a change,” he said. those youth, so there’s just a lot of differ- really successful in suburban and rural Learn more www.yfcsd.org. “The next day I was at a YFC training here ent cultures,” Collier said. in San Diego, and one of the leaders turned The youth leader said he was also sur- to me and said, ‘Josh, what would it take for prised by the size of San Diego’s homeless you to move to San Diego?’” youth population. They spent the next few months in ex- “You know, a lot of people never think tended prayer and ongoing conversations about that because you don’t really see with the San Diego team. homeless youth,” Collier said. “They fly “We felt increasingly called to San Di- under the radar. But there’s an estimated ego,” Collier said. “Part of what excited 2,000 youth literally living on the streets, me about the role in YFC—other than the and that’s not counting kids who are couch sun—was the adventure of starting some- surfing, living in cars or in shelters. That’s thing new, of coming into a place like San just a big number. These are kids made Diego where there is incredible opportu- to be loved and cherished, and (yet) so nity to grow new ministry in a large city.” many are just out there on their own. They Collier was first acquainted with Youth should be going to school and hanging out for Christ in 2003, when he began volun- with friends and making their parents roll teering for the organization as a youth their eyes, but they’re out there. Many are leader for a Tacoma church plant. His pas- alone just trying to find food and shelter tor suggested he contact Youth for Christ. and survive.” “I visited my first Campus Life club and Collier and his San Diego team are com- I was totally hooked,” he said. “I loved the mitted to changing that through a series of relational focus, the heart for the gospel, new initiatives designed to reach out to the and that teens were hearing about Jesus region’s burgeoning, and often troubled, and responding.” urban population. n A group of teens participate in outdoor games during a YFC outing at Oakbridge Camp in Ramona.
February 2016 | Refreshed 7 outtakes
Underground Railroad home. Directed by Harvey Lowry, “Union Bound” co-stars Randy Wayne (“To Save a diary comes to life Life”; “The Dukes of Hazzard: The Begin- “Union Bound,” a screenplay based on ning”), Isaac C. Singleton (“Pirates of the the diaries of Union soldier Joseph Hoover, Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl”), hits the big screen Feb. 12 in time for Black Christian Fortune (“New Year’s Eve”) and History Month. Drew Seeley (“High School Musical”). Cac- As detailed in his writings, Hoover was tus Moser (Wynonna & the Big Noise) re- captured during the Battle of the Wilder- corded the theme song and makes an ap- Sean Stone, right, stars in a scene from “Union Bound,” which releases Feb. 12. ness, a bloody 1864 campaign that pitted pearance as a wounded soldier. commanders Ulysses S. Grant and Robert The fi lm is presented by Uptone Pic- Based on the best-selling story by Don at 7 p.m. Feb. 18. A repeat performance is E. Lee on the Virginia battlefi eld. Upon tures, Moving Box Entertainment and Piper and Cecil Murphey, the PG-13 fi lm set for 7 p.m. March 3, with matinee shows his capture prisoner Hoover was taken to Weathervane Productions. (rating based on intense accident scenes) at 12:55 p.m. Feb. 20 and March 5. the notorious Andersonville Prison Camp. A companion book from WND Books, stars Hayden Christensen (“Star Wars: Epi- That’s when it will present “Women of Four months later, he was transferred to will release on May 2. sode II—Attack of the Clones,” “Star Wars: Faith: An Amazing Joyful Journey.” BY Ex- a new camp in South Carolina, where he perience, pioneers of live cinema events, managed to escape, aided by slaves. Episode III—Revenge of the Sith), and Kate is producing the event in association with Through the Underground Railroad, ‘90 Minutes in Heaven’ Bosworth (“Superman Returns,” “Still Al- Fathom Events. Hoover fought his way to freedom. Sean Pure Flix Entertainment has released ice”), the late Sen. Fred Dalton Thompson Described as part documentary, part live Stone (son of fi lm director Oliver Stone) DVD and Blu-Ray editions of “90 Minutes and recording artist Michael W. Smith. event, the show takes audiences on the his- plays Hoover, who becomes a cabinetmak- in Heaven,” the powerful true story of faith The fi lm originally released to theaters toric journey of the Women of Faith move- er after returning to his upstate New York tested almost beyond human endurance. on Sept. 11. During the 90 minutes Piper is declared ment through the years—on stage and off— dead after a violent traffi c accident. He and along their travels with World Vision, subsequently experiences love, joy and life sharing how Women of Faith has been an like he’s never known. infl uence in the lives of more than fi ve mil- Piper is declared dead after a violent lion women. traffi c accident. He subsequently expe- The line-up includes never-before-seen riences love, joy and life like he’s never interviews, hilarious outtakes and behind- known.Piper is snapped back into reality, the-scenes footage featuring some of the however, and the husband and father faces most beloved and popular speakers, in- excruciating pain and emotional turmoil cluding Patsy Clairmont, Mary Graham, after his heavenly experience. His fi ght Jen Hatmaker, Nicole Johnson, Marilyn back to health is augmented by his strong Meberg, Sandi Patty, Luci Swindoll, Sheila Walsh and Thelma Wells, as well as music faith and committed support of his family and performances from Christian contem- and community. porary artists who have appeared on the tour over the two decades. ‘Women of Faith’ San Diego venues include Mission Val- Women of Faith, which has hosted con- ley 20, Mira Mesa 18, La Jolla Village 12, ferences across the country for the past 20 Plaza Bonita 14, Otay Ranch 12 and San The cinematic event “Women of Faith: An Amazing Joyful Journey,” will be shown at theaters nationwide on Feb. 18. years, will host its fi rst-ever cinema event Marcos 18.
tunes
Indian worship team ture from within for sure, but what matters Passion for music most to us is not as much what is going on The newest album from Passion, Pas- to release album inside, but our impact outside the church.” sion: Salvation’s Tide is Rising, releases Jan. Pearl City Worship, a church-based wor- Already released in India, Pearl City 29. The album released in conjunction with ship team in Hyderabad, India, will release Worship’s debut album soared to No. 1 on the Passion 2016 Conference, where more its fi rst international album We Won’t Be the iTunes “Religious” sales chart, topping than 40,000 college students gathered in Silent on March 18. Hindu, Muslim and all other religious re- three locations at the same time to pro- The band serves at Pearl City Church cordings in India. The album is distributed and was discovered by Ian Eskelin, a two- by The Fuel Music. claim the name of Jesus. time Dove Award-winning Producer of the The album features acclaimed worship Year. Sharing her inheritance leaders Chris Tomlin, Crowder, Matt Red- The church leads thousands of Chris- man, Kristian Stanfi ll, Christy Nockels, Audrey Assad fell in love with hymns tians in a city of more than seven million Brett Younker, Melodie Malone and Jimi as a child raised in the Plymouth Breth- “I knew that Inheritance had to be much people. Cravity. ren church, where vocal cords (the “sacred more than me going into the studio and The project’s 10 tracks include several “What I saw that day was a vibrant, ex- harp”) were the only instrument in Sunday simply doing pretty renditions of hymns we new songs that were written specifi cally for citing church where the chaos of the world services. all know and love,” Assad said. “I couldn’t Passion 2016. was outside—poverty, people living in “I learned to sing there, from the old be satisfi ed with that—I had to make some- straw huts, cows walking down the street— hymnbooks, in four-part harmony, with my thing both bright and dark—colored hon- and you walk through these doors and you family and my neighbors,” said Assad, the estly with my own doubts and weaknesses, Jesus Culture echoes live see a thousand people praising God with daughter of a Syrian refugee. “It was multi- so that the Lord who inspired these songs Jesus Culture, on the heels of 2014’s guitars and vocals and smiles on their fac- generational, it was deep and rich and could be even more visible in it.” successful Unstoppable Love, has released es,” said Eskelin, founder of Radiate Music, beautiful, and like most of my favorite wor- Assad, a multiple Dove Award nominee the brand new live album, Let It Echo. which signed the group. ship music, it was steeped in community.” and iTunes Christian Breakthrough Album This is the fi rst album recorded live in The producer was surprised to fi nd the That love of hymns is refl ected in “In- of the Year recipient for 2010’s The House front of the band’s new congregation at worship band ministering in English. heritance,” a new album by the singer- You’re Building, has toured with Tenth Av- their newly established campus in Sacra- “Impacting culture is what I feel sets songwriter. It releases Feb. 12 on Fortunate enue North, Matt Maher and Jars of Clay. mento. Let It Echo captures the heart of the Pearl City apart of other churches in Fall Records with Tone Tree Music distri- She was also featured on Chris Tomlin’s community seeking Jesus and the desire to our city,” said Scott Norling, Pearl City bution. Assad calls her music “soundtracks RIAA certifi ed Gold record, “Glory in the see this passion spread from the cities to Church’s pastor. “We have a unique cul- for prayer.” Highest” (2009). the nations.
8 REFRESHED | February 2016 community news
Distributing food to the needy 20 churches in the next 10 years. Night Out event from 6 to 9:30 p.m. Feb. 12. help with cleanup, and spend time building The school is located at 450 Fletcher The event is open to children who are relationships with the guests. Music and SAN DIEGO — Bayview Charities at Bay- Parkway, Suite 224. nursery age through the fi fth grade. singing are also offered. view Baptist Church holds a monthly food For more information, call (619) 249-6386. The cost is $10 for the fi rst child and $5 The church is located at 2051 Sunset giveaway on the third Friday of every month. for each additional child. Cliffs Blvd. The next distribution will be from 8 to The church is located at 9638 Carlton For more information, contact Karen 11 a.m. Feb. 19 at the church. Weekend resource for post- Hills Blvd. Bombaci at [email protected]. The church is located at 6134 Benson Ave. abortive women Learn more at www.pathways.cc or by Learn more at www.bayviewbc.org or CHULA VISTA — Silent Voices, a South Bay calling (619) 449-1269. call (619) 266-3621. Rescue mission offers ministry assisting women in crisis pregnan- free site tours cies, will hold a weekend support group for Christian Businessmen’s PLNU hosts anti-traffi cking women who have experienced an abortion. SAN DIEGO — The San Diego Rescue events The Post Abortion Healing & Recovery Breakfast Mission offers monthly tours for people program will be held Feb. 19 to 21. POINT LOMA — The Christian Busi- interested in learning more about the pro- POINT LOMA — Eugene Cho, a Seattle- For more information, call (619) 422-0757. nessmen’s Breakfast will be held 7 a.m. grams it offers. based pastor, humanitarian and activist, Feb. 26 at the Marine Corp Recruit Depot’s The tours are at 6 p.m. the second Mon- will be the keynote speaker at the “Just Say- Bay View Restaurant. day of the month and at noon the sec- ing—Freedom for the Captives,” a spoken Stressing that marriage matters The guest speaker will be Air Force Col. ond Thursday of each month. During the word event set for 7 p.m. Feb. 11 in Brown SAN DIEGO — Ocean View Church will John Marcellus (retired), a Division Com- 45-minute tours, guests are provided de- Chapel at Point Loma Nazarene University. present its Marriage Matters conference on mander in the U.S. Pacifi c Fleet. tails about the mission and the many pro- The event will also feature Southern Feb. 19 and 20. For more information, contact David grams offered by the Bankers Hill ministry, Californian musicians and a variety of spo- This weekend conference provides time Guzik at (619) 590-2110. which include housing, counseling, feeding ken word artists. Spoken word is a style of and space for married couples to laugh to- programs, education and alumni aftercare. entertaining that often involves poetry, gether, pray together, and draw nearer to Quilt-making fundraiser Reservations are required. word play or storytelling. God for strength and encouragement. The rescue mission is located at 120 Elm SAN DIEGO — City View Church will The free event is sponsored by Center The $20 fee includes dessert on Friday St. host a Mystery Quilt workshop from 8:30 for Justice and Reconciliation, the Center night, dinner on Saturday, and materials. For more information, send an email to a.m. to 7:30 p.m. Feb. 27. for International Development, and Spiri- The church is located at 2460 Palm Ave. [email protected] or call (619) 819- During the event, participants follow a tual Development, all at PLNU. Churches For more information, send an email to 1897. series of instructions, learning a variety of Against Traffi cking, a San Diego network- [email protected] or call (619) 424- ing group, is also a sponsor. 7870. techniques. At the end of the day the mys- Proceeds from the event will benefi t the tery quilt is revealed. Cancer support group Beauty for Ashes Scholarship Fund at PLNU. The $80 ($65 is tax deductible) cost in- BONITA — Bonita Valley Community The next day, the campus will host Pas- ‘My Therapist Sez…’ cludes meals and snacks. Proceeds benefi t Church presents its ongoing Living Hope tors Day, an interactive breakfast work- LA MESA — Skyline Church will host its Royal Family Kid Camp. support group for cancer patients from 7 to shop to show spiritual leaders how to help monthly “My Therapist Sez…” program at For more information, contact Kay La- 8:30 p.m. Feb. 2. their congregation engage with anti-hu- 6:45 p.m. March 2 in the Worship Center boda, director of Prayers and Squares at The group is held the fi rst Tuesday of each man traffi cking work. The free event will Auditorium. City View, by email at [email protected] month in the Life Center Conference Room. run from 8:30 to 9:30 a.m. Feb. 12; a light A panel of trained therapists will re- or by calling (619) 994-0559. The support group tries to create a lov- breakfast will be served. spond to questions on important life topics ing, compassionate and hopeful environ- The meeting is an interactive session in a session moderated by Dr. Don Welch. Monthly homeless outreach ment that is both safe and prayerful. The The meetings are held the fi rst Tuesday of family friendly atmosphere is designed for intended to inspire and inform pastors OCEAN BEACH — Newbreak Church, every month. Child care is available with an patients and their family members. about the partnership that churches pro- which has campuses in Tierrasanta, Pacifi c email RSVP to [email protected]. The church is located at 4744 Bonita Road. vide in the effort to end human traffi cking. Beach, Scripps Mesa and El Cajon, hosts a The church is located at 11330 Campo Learn more at www.bonitavalley.com or Presenters will describe how churches in monthly breakfast outreach for the home- Road. by calling (619) 475-8000. the San Diego region have joined together less at Trinity Episcopal Church. For more information, call (619) 660-5000. to combat traffi cking. Congregational re- The next outreach will be held Feb. 6. ONLINE CALENDAR OF EVENTS sources will also be provided. Upcoming dates are March 5, April 2, May 7 For more Community News and an online Although free, reservations for the Parents Night Out and June 4. All times are 8 to 10 a.m. Calendar of Events for San Diego County, please breakfast are requested by Feb. 1. SANTEE — Just in time for Valentine’s During the outreach volunteers distrib- visit www.refreshedsandiego.com. Learn more at www.abolishhumantraf- Day, Pathways Church will host a Parents ute clothing, prepare and serve breakfast, fi cking.com. Church planting school to open st EL CAJON — Apostolos School of Leader- THE 21 ANNUAL ship and Church Planting is accepting enroll- ment for its new college. The name is Greek AT POINT LOMA NAZARENE UNIVERSITY for “sent one.” Classes begin in March. A witty and informative interview-based experience where the A ministry of Narratives Church, the audience gets to eavesdrop on conversations between authors school’s mission is to develop Christian leaders and church planters through an about the art and angst of writing. organic and academically accredited path- February 16-19, 2016 way. The faculty is comprised of local pas- tors from across denominational back- 7ORKSHOPS s )NTERVIEWS s "OOK 3IGNINGS grounds who are academically qualifi ed in- structors and experienced church planters. Students will earn a Bachelor of Arts de- gree in Christian Leadership and will have the option of choosing one of four con- Nikki Giovanni Sarah Bessey centrations: Bible and Theology, Pastoral Author, spoken word artist, poet, Author of the best-selling book, Ministry, Discipleship and Formation and essayist, professor for more than “Jesus Feminist,” and of the new Organic Organizational Leadership. A cer- 40 years. An Oprah Winfrey Living book, “Out of Sorts: Making tifi cate program in Leadership is also avail- Legend. Peace.” Dick Enberg Robin Jones Gunn able. A master’s program in church plant- Thu., Feb. 18, 7pm &RI &EB Hall of Fame broadcaster and author Author of the Christy Miller ing is scheduled to be offered in 2019. of his autobiography, “Oh, My!”. Wrote series, Sierra Jensen series, Graduates will be provided with practi- 4ICKETS AVAILABLE AT WWWPOINTLOMAEDUWRITERS a play about basketball coach Al Katie Weldon series, Sisterchicks cal training in how to live, love and share McGuire. series, Glenbrooke series. Point Loma Nazarene University the gospel. Tue., Feb. 16, 7pm Wed., Feb. 17, 7pm ,OMALAND s 3AN $IEGO s In addition to its focus on academic training, the vision of Apostolos is to plant
February 2016 | REFRESHED 9 national news
Vonette Bright passes ment that today includes more than 2 mil- Faithbox donates lion people in 30,000 observances nation- ORLANDO — Vonette wide. 100,000 meals Zachary Bright, co-found- NEW YORK — Startup er of Campus Crusade for nonprofi t Faithbox, a month- Christ, the world’s largest Franklin Graham to bring ly box subscription providing Subscribers receive daily devotionals and a variety of spiritual helps and Christian ministry, died national tour to Sacramento spiritual content and socially Dec. 23 due to complica- socially conscience products through the monthly distribution of Faithbox. SACRAMENTO — Evangelist Franklin conscious products, provided tions from acute leuke- Graham, who heads Samaritan’s Purse, will more than 100,000 meals for impoverished includes passages by Cindy Woodsmall, mia. She was 89. be in Sacramento March 31 as part of his children in 2015. Susan May Warren, Sherry Kyle and Renae In 1951, Vonette and her late husband, national Decision America Tour. Through a partnership with Rice Bowls, Brumbaugh. Dr. William “Bill” R. Bright launched Cam- Graham launched the tour in January Faithbox donated three meals for every Learn more at www.fi ctiondevo.com. pus Crusade for Christ at UCLA with the and will visit all 50 states in an effort to subscription box it sold. goal to “win the campus today, win the challenge Christians to pray for the nation “From the start, Faithbox was founded world tomorrow.” Darwin Day resolutions and take a stand for their faith. on the principle of making an impact,” said Their heart for evangelism lasted more introduced “I think the problem with our nation to- CEO Willie Morris, who founded the orga- than half a century. The foundation that WASHINGTON, D.C. — Two members of day is the failure of the Church,” Graham nization in 2014. employs more than 25,000 staff members the U.S. Congress have introduced resolu- said. “We have gotten ourselves into a mess “We are grateful for the many subscrib- and 300,000 volunteers in 173 countries. tions designating Feb. 12 as Darwin Day. as a country.” ers who have helped us achieve this mile- The ministry is now known as Cru in the The resolution is designed to celebrate the Graham plans to stop at each state capi- stone. Reaching the goal of 100,000 meals United States. achievements of biologist Charles Darwin tol where he will hold a prayer rally, calling our fi rst year only energizes our team to Though the Campus Ministry is still and affi rm the scientifi c consensus sup- on Americans to boldly live out their faith raise the bar and do even more in 2016.” the largest branch of Campus Crusade, it porting the theory of evolution. Darwin and help turn the country back to God. One In addition to its monthly devotional, is joined by other ministries like Athletes was born on that date in 1809. of his goals is to remind believers of the Bible verses and application suggestions, in Action, The JESUS Film Project, The Josh The fi rst resolution, H.Res. 548, was in- source of their hope Faithbox includes a variety of ethically fo- McDowell Ministry and FamilyLife. troduced in the House by Rep. Jim Himes “I don’t have hope in the Republican cused products. Many of the products are also In addition to the campus ministry, of Connecticut. That was followed with a party or the Democratic party,” he said. selected because of the charitable commit- Bright was infl uential in founding the Na- similar move by Sen. Richard Blumenthal, “The only hope that I have is in the Church ments of those companies, Morris said. tional Prayer Committee, a group of lead- also of Connecticut. who introduced S. Res. if it would repent of its sins,” he said. “And Learn more at faithbox.com. ers who seek to motivate other Christians 337. Both men introduced similar measures if we confess our sins individually and then to unite in prayer for spiritual awakening last year but they failed to advance. repent, then I believe God … can use us.” in America. In 1988, she successfully pe- Looking at love Both resolutions are supported by the Graham will not be endorsing any can- titioned Congress to designate the fi rst MINNEAPOLIS — Forget the fl owers Secular Coalition for America. didates, but is asking Thursday of every May as the permanent and candy. Author Kathy Ide has another In addition to supporting Darwin’s work, day for the National Day of Prayer. She Christians to pray for the country, vote for gift option for Cupid, a new book called “21 the resolutions also condemncreationism served nine years as chairwoman of the people who hold biblical values and to run for Days of Love: Stories that Celebrate Trea- and intelligent design saying, “the teach- National Day of Prayer Task Force, a move- public offi ce at every level. sured Relationships.” ing of creationism in some public schools Unlike most Valentine’s gifts, which fo- compromises the scientifi c and academic cus on romantic love, Ide’s book explores a integrity of the education systems of the variety of relationship experiences, includ- United States.” ing the kindness of a stranger or a child for Kelly Damerow, interim executive direc- her teacher. tor of the Secular Coalition for America, “These stories represent all kinds of said the House resolution has gained a to- We can you. love,” a news release said. “Woven through tal of 15 co-sponsors since its introduction. help each story is the sustaining hand of our “This resolution celebrates the intellec- loving heavenly Father. On Valentine’s tual bravery and scientifi c discovery that Day—and every day—whether your life is contribute to the well-being of all people,” chocolates and fl owers or loneliness and Damerow said. “Congressional recognition pain … let these stories fi ll your heart with will help foster the scientifi c inquiry and hope, peace, and most important, love.” natural curiosity that builds a brighter fu- The BroadStreet Publishing product ture for all mankind.”
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10 REFRESHED | February 2016 reality check
DANIEL JENKINS
Ultimate love
Our beloved housecat died last week. motionless, airless—it will change. when they re- tion or loss of love. Marvin the Cat was a mere 6 years old and It will not be broken; it will become vealed themselves in his prime. We heard a crash in one of unbreakable, impenetrable, irre- to me. Yes, every- For I am convinced that nei- the bedrooms and there he was, on the deemable. ... The only place outside one sins and falls ther death nor life, neither angels fl oor, taking his last breath. His death is a Heaven where you can be perfectly short of perfection, nor demons, neither the present mystery. Maybe he fell and hit his head, or safe from all the dangers and pertur- but Satan has a way of nor the future, nor any powers, nei- maybe it was a heart attack. We will prob- bations of love is Hell. magnifying those imper- ther height nor depth, nor anything ably never know. fections to create self-loath- else in all creation, will be able to Although my wife and I aren’t “cat Therein lies the trap that so many of ing and self-condemnation. separate us from the love of God that people,” we came to love Marvin and ac- us fall into. The safety of isolation—of be- The lie is clear: Isolation makes is in Christ Jesus our Lord (Romans cept him as part of our family. Once again, ing a “rock” or an “island” as described by us weak, not strong. Our hearts 8:38-39). we have loved and lost. To love a person or Simon and Garfunkel—also means that we become hardened, like a rock, and a pet is to risk feeling the pain of separa- will not know love. just as senseless. With this foundational truth about our tion. In fact, it’s more than a risk. It’s a Protecting our fragile hearts by keep- As Alfred Lord Tennyson said, “Tis bet- security, let us embrace the “dangers and certainty. ing others at bay also means that we will ter to have loved and lost than never to perturbations of love” by being vulnerable to others with our thoughts and feelings. In his book, “The Four Loves,” C.S. not be truly known for who we are. The have loved at all.” This is especially true During this month of February, when we Lewis points out this harsh truth: wounds of past relationships remind us to if you buy into the idea that earthly love celebrate Valentine’s Day to commemorate keep up the walls in order to stay safe and eventually ends in separation. The only those we love, let us step out of our com- To love at all is to be vulnerable. hidden. love that never fails, that goes on forever, fort zone and risk loving more. Love anything, and your heart will So many horrible beliefs seem true is godly love. There’s no hiding from it certainly be wrung and possibly when we live in loneliness and isolation. either. God knows everything about you, broken. If you want to make sure of As a client of mine recently exclaimed, “If and yet He loves you even though the im- Daniel Jenkins, Ph.D. keeping your heart intact, you must you really knew me, you would not like perfections are many. is a licensed clinical give your heart to no one, not even to me.” But the opposite is actually true; the Maybe the truth is that God loves you psychologist at Lighthouse an animal. Wrap it carefully round more someone knows you, the more they because you have no secrets from Him. Psychological Services in with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid can genuinely love you. Maybe God’s love is so deep because He Mission Valley. He is also all entanglements; lock it up safe in In all my years of being a psychothera- does understand your pain and suffering. a professor of psychology the casket or coffi n of your selfi sh- pist (nearly 30!), there have been very few The One who loves us cannot be taken at Point Loma Nazarene ness. But in that casket—safe, dark, times when I found a person to be evil from us. There is no need to fear separa- University. Learn more at www.lighthousepsy.com.
The tree of knowledge begins with literacy
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February 2016 | REFRESHED 11 on the money
JANICE THOMPSON
Practically Speaking—Changes to Social Security
Just when you think it can’t possibly until a later age. Meanwhile the spouse option to request a lump sum payment of temporarily tap into other retirement in- get more complicated, enter the Federal can begin receiving benefi ts based on the retroactive suspended benefi ts. come to allow your Social Security benefi ts Bipartisan Budget Act of 2015. While there primary fi ler’s record. The primary can • Age 62 or older by end of 2015, mar- to grow. has never been—and probably never will continue to accrue delayed retirement ried to eligible spouse who is 66 or older 2. Maximizing your survivor benefi t be—a one-size-fi ts-all solution to Social credits until age 70. and not collecting benefi ts. Consider the to protect your spouse is another reason Security fi ling, this new bill brings signifi - Restricted Application strategy if either to consider delaying your benefi t until cant change. It will make the two most How does this affect me? of these two reasons for doing so makes age 70. To do this, you need to be sure to common fi ling strategies for couples, Re- • No impact if you are currently receiv- sense for you: plan for income replacement until age stricted Application and File and Suspend, ing Social Security benefi ts or widowed 1. You want to collect a spousal benefi t 70. things of the past. So, if your birth year is and remain unmarried. while growing your own benefi ts. 1953 or earlier, pay close attention to the • Pay close attention if you are NOT 2. You want to maximize the survi- 3. Visit MySAA.com to obtain your cur- following information as you have a very receiving benefi ts, are 62 or older, or turn vor’s benefi t by having the higher earning rent statement. Consider using the Social short window to act. 66 by April 29, 2016 and are married or di- spouse fi le the Restricted Application. Security calculator (www.SSA.gov) to help vorced. Note: Divorcees who were married • Born after 1953. Although the Re- you determine the best strategy for your Strategies to be eliminated 10 years or more will only be able to claim stricted Application and File and Suspend situation. This might also be a good time • Restricted Application. This spousal a spousal benefi t at age 66 if they were 62 options are no longer available to you, to meet with your trusted fi nancial adviser strategy allows one spouse at Full Retire- by Dec. 31, 2015. it’s never too early to begin planning for to review strategies for your long-term ment Age (FRA is currently age 66-plus retirement. For most, Social Security re- income replacement needs. if birth year is 1943-1954) to apply for a What should I do now? mains a key component for future income. Signifi cant changes like this one to So- benefi t based on the spouse’s record while • Age 66 or older and not yet collecting Consider this: cial Security present a great opportunity delaying their own benefi t. This allows benefi ts. Consider the File and Suspend 1. Filing prior to your FRA will reduce to step back and review your overall fi nan- the larger benefi t to grow an average of 8 strategy by April 29, 2016 if either of these your benefi t while delaying benefi ts be- cial plan regardless of your age. There are percent per year until age 70. Couples who two reasons for doing so makes sense for yond your FRA will increase your benefi ts. many important nuances to this budget want some income now while waiting for you: At least this part of Social Security has not bill. Don’t let the apparent complexities of the higher earner’s benefi ts to grow can 1. You want to allow a spouse/de- changed. For every year you delay taking benefi t from this strategy. pendent to collect benefi ts based on the benefi ts between age 62 and 70, they will retirement planning—and specifi cally So- • File and Suspend. This strategy al- primary fi ler’s record while the primary’s grow an average of 8 percent. In today’s cial Security-related considerations—keep lows a couple to claim benefi ts at FRA but benefi ts continue to grow. investment environment, that’s a very at- you from taking action. Being proactive suspend payments based on their record 2. You want to preserve the primary’s tractive return. It may even make sense to rather than reactive allows you to make the wisest decisions possible for you and your family. FOR YOURCALL FREE COPY Janice Thompson is a certifi ed fi nancial planner and co-founder/CEO of One Degree Advisors, Inc. A frequent speaker on fi nancial topics and mentor for fi nancial professionals, she also serves on the board of directors for Kingdom Print Advisors. Learn more at www.onedegreeadvisors.com. Advisory services offered through One Degree Advisors, Inc.SM Securities offered through Securities America, Inc., Member FINRA/SIPC. One Degree Advisors and Securities America Online are separate companies. Digital fl ipbook Downloadable PDF Marriage | Addictions Anger Management Trauma | PTSD Mobile-accessible and more Facebook Military and other insurances accepted Dr. Marcial Felan, LMFT #45603 (619) 212-5222 Biblically-integrated Counseling Products and services featuring Christian-owned 10% referral for buyers and sellers and operated businesses. to your church or ministry. www.sandiegochristiandirectory.com
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12 REFRESHED | February 2016 purposeful parenting
MICHAEL FOUST
6 secrets to eating out with kids … and enjoying it
The fi rst time my wife and I took our My family views “eating out” much the end of the table, the kids on the other. newborn to a restaurant, time seemingly way people viewed meals during Jesus’ stood still. Sweet elderly ladies “oohed” life—as a time of leisurely fun and fellow- Use distractions when needed. and “aahed” over our little bundle of joy. ship. We’re not there simply to eat. We’re 5I loathe our society’s addiction to Waitresses stopped by our table to take a there to talk and enjoy one another. screens, but when I’m at a restaurant and peek, amazed by his long eyelashes and So, can a family of small children eat have shelled out hard-earned money for quiet manner. Heck, even a few rough- out regularly without chaos ensuing? Yes. a meal, I sometimes bend the rules. This looking grown men—the type you don’t Here are a few tips that helped us … means my kids, after they have fi nished want to cross—cracked a smile. and may help you, too: their food, may get to play games on my smartphone. It extends our mealtime a bit, It was, in one word, “wonderful.” most everywhere else, we’re fi ne. Fast forward two years, and restaurant Practice at home. When my daughter keeps the noise level down, and even gives my wife and I a mini-date. visits were no longer the highlight of 1was 2, she had a bad restaurant habit: Choose your mealtime wisely. For our week. Yes, our son, Graham, was still not staying in her seat. She would get up and restaurants, my kids (ages 7, 4, 4, new- 3 Be patient. Kids, after all, are still kids. precious, but instead of sleeping, he was walk around the table, greeting each person born) are at their best in the morning, af- randomly putting pepper shakers in his with a kiss. Cute, yes, but not if all of the 6Even with all of the preparation in the ter naps, and after a physical activity. This world, your visit may still be a disaster. mouth. Instead of calmly drinking a bottle, kids are doing it, over and over. So we began means we eat breakfast and dinner a lot Sometimes I wonder if kids misbehaved he was stubbornly tossing macaroni on the practicing her table manners at home. Even- and we only eat lunch if we’ve, say, been to around Jesus—particularly after His fa- fl oor, wondering why Mommy and Daddy tually, after a few tears, she learned. the zoo or gone on a hike. By then, the kids mous “let the children come to me” state- were stressed and the people at the next will be hungry … and ready to sit down. ment. I’m sure there were a few kids tug- table were laughing. Then there was the Choose your restaurants wisely. Per- ging on His robe or interrupting His talk. time when we ordered our food and he haps you and your family act wonder- 2 Clear the table. Yes, literally. And And if so, we’re all in good company. immediately began pitching a fi t. Unable fully at nice Italian restaurants. My kids 4quickly. See that nice silverware ar- to calm him, we boxed up all of our food, don’t. It’s just too quiet, and at most of rangement? That vase of fl owers? Those Michael Foust is the father hopped in the car and drove home. them there’s not enough visual stimula- packets of jams and jellies? If you have a of four small children and Not every instance with our then-2- tion. Here’s what works for us: restaurants young one, they all will be on the fl oor be- blogs about parenting at year-old son was taxing, but there were with outdoor seating, restaurants with in- fore you even sit down— and your meal will michaelfoust.com. enough tough moments that we began stant appetizers (read: Mexican), and res- be ruined before you even order. If we’re evaluating what we could do better to taurants with a loud atmosphere. If my wife near a window, we place table items on the make visits to restaurants more enjoyable. and I want Italian, we get a babysitter. But windowsill. Otherwise, the items go on one
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February 2016 | REFRESHED 13 inspired living
PAUL ROCHFORD
Please sir, may I have some more?
“Just a little bit more” was the response such things, prompting us to go down to the “Don’t you think you have enough kids?” ing, “Well I appreciate what you are doing, given by the world’s richest man John D. shop and buy the newest teaching or product These all tap into the quest for “just a but it’s not enough. I need a little bit more. Rockefeller to the question, “How much that promises and guarantees us the answer little bit more.” I need to feel a little bit better, be a little money is enough money?” Here was a man to our problems. What does God say about all this? bit richer, little bit more successful. I need who had it all and yet he wanted “just a little Your health is bad? Eat organic and Romans 8:32 gives us the answer: “He a little bigger family and a little more guar- bit more.” Just a little, he wasn’t asking for stretch. You don’t have enough money? Go who did not spare His own Son, but delivered antee that things are going to work out for much, just a little, is that too much to ask? to our school and invest with us. Your life Him up for us all, how shall He not with Him me. What you are doing is great but I need a Christians, if we are not careful that ends seems out of balance and you’re unhappy? also freely give us all things?” little bit more.” up being our plea as well: “Just a little bit Take our drug. You will not survive a car This delves into the biblical concept of Preposterous? more.” crash without this car and our car seat. You moving from the greater to the lesser. If Not from a gospel perspective. Too often This can come in the most common forms will be miserable unless you buy our bed. God gave us the greatest gift of all, salvation we forget Christ’s work, and the wonder, cost man knows: health, happiness, wealth, safe- Maybe you have heard this: through the death of Jesus Christ—which He and greatness of our salvation. ty, physical satisfaction and relationship. In “When are you getting married?” freely did—then why would we think He is Let us remember what God tells us in fact, most often those peddling a false hope “When are you having kids?” keeping anything else from us? Romans 8:32: He has already given us the key off of mankind’s common desires for “When are you having more kids?” For the Christian, God does not need to greatest gift and that He is not going to keep from us what we truly need. give us anything more. He has given us the I know we have desires, but let us not greatest gift of all. Imagine standing before make gods out of them. Let us not be un- the cross as Jesus was being crucifi ed. You BANKRUPTCY? satisfi ed and forget what we have already see Him being whipped. His back bloody received freely, the greatest gift of all—life in You Have Options and raw, a crown of thorns pushed fi rm onto Jesus Christ. We don’t need a little bit more. His head. The mocking crowed spitting on God has given us all we need in Christ. Stop Foreclosure Him and laughing. Nails pounded into His FAMILY FOCUS hands one at a time and into the front of His Stop the IRS Paul Rochford, executive CHRISTIAN COUNSELING ankles. Then, with each breath taken, He has pastor at Barabbas Road GET RELIEF FROM Focusing on Choices that Change Lives to push up on His feet to gasp for air. Church and a graduate of Finally, He gives up the ghost and a sol- Southern California Seminary, CREDITORS NOW!! Marriage | Family dier with all his might heaves a spear right is working on his Master’s of into His side and you see blood and water Divinity degree. s ,OWER CAR PAYMENTS Depression | Anxiety pour out. Imagine in the midst of that say- s 3TOP FORECLOSURE Anger Management s +EEP YOUR ASSETS & more s 7IPE OUT DEBTS Leave your car problems with our skilled mechanics s 3TOP CREDITORS Individuals s -AKE A NEW WE TEACH SKIN CARE Complete Auto Repair START Couples We have a proven effective skin care Import & Domestic program for you. All basic skin care products Major Repairs are non-comedogenic and clinically tested Families Minor Repairs for skin irritancy and allergy. Brakes Sandy Hertzberg Front End FREE CONSULTATION Insurance accepted | Sliding Scale Fees Oil & Lube 7066 El Cajon Blvd. Attorney Steven Houbeck (619) 265-0138 Diagnostics San Diego Call 619-440-4211 AC/Heating (619) 465-8686 Independent allmanfamilyauto.com (619) 463-HELP 4357 www.familyfocuscounseling.org Beauty Consultant Same-Day Service
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14 REFRESHED | February 2016 that’s life!
JOANNE BROKAW
Mama mia, don’t break the pasta
Over the holidays I noticed a new prod- the fi rst place. sized spaghetti. Lynda explains, sticks to the spaghetti, thereby affect- uct on my grocery store shelf: half-sized The debate over pasta size included “When I break the long spaghetti, ing the taste. The articles also insisted spaghetti. It’s basically plain spaghetti, comments from my friend, Bob, who regu- I tend to have some pieces go fl ying that breaking the spaghetti is bad luck but half the length of regular spaghetti larly cooks a variety of delicious-looking around.” Several people agreed with and a crime akin to denying your Italian and touted as the “perfect size for any pot” Italian dishes for his family and shares the her; breaking the pasta is messy, they heritage. Someone even shared links to because there’s no need to break it in half. photos on social media. say, so pre-broken pasta makes sense. stores where you can buy a properly sized At the risk of sounding like a curmud- “Never break the pasta,” he wrote. Amy breaks the pasta to fi t her spaghetti pot. geon, have we become so lazy as Americans When I asked why, he replied, “You’re not small saucepan because it takes too Because, as any good Italian knows, that we can’t break our own pasta in half? supposed to break it.” long to boil water in a bigger pan. to properly cook spaghetti you put it in a I posted that sentiment, along with For the record, I don’t break the pasta; “However,” she adds, “I prefer to pot of salted, rapidly boiling water, with a photo of the box of spaghetti, on my I know not to do that. But why am I not break my own pasta.” the ends of the pasta sticking out. You let Facebook page. My intent was to gener- supposed to do that? I asked the question And then there’s Kimberly, who un- it sit for about 30 seconds until it starts ate discussion about the way we rely on again and again, and dozens of people abashedly admitted, “I was so excited to get a bit soft, and then gently bend the convenience items and technology to do responded. The conversations went some- to see this product the other day that I rest of the pasta into the water. everyday things we really should be do- thing like this: bought some immediately. Too lazy to If you can’t do that in the pot you have, ing ourselves. I’m not even talking about Sarah: “Um. My Italian Grammy just break my own dang pasta? You bet! Small don’t break the spaghetti. Go out and buy things like relying on GPS instead of read- rolled over in her grave. You do NOT break luxuries like this turn me on, lol!” a new pot. Unless, of course, you’re too ing a map. I’m talking about using electric spaghetti, you do not cut spaghetti. I’m Non-breakers were aghast. lazy. staplers and wearing self-tying sneakers. offended by this product for that reason But why? Breaking spaghetti doesn’t The little rant made sense to me, so alone lol, completely ignoring the laziness change the molecular structure, does it? Award-winning freelance imagine my surprise when instead of factor.” So the half-sized spaghetti should taste writer Joanne Brokaw spends people talking about the laziness of half- Me: “So what’s the difference between the same as the longer spaghetti, right? her days dreaming of things sized spaghetti, I was hit with a barrage of broken pasta and pasta made half-sized? The world won’t end if you break your she’d like to do but probably replies that all shared the same message: Nothing, right? Or is it just that it’s small- spaghetti or do it the lazy way and buy it never will— like swimming Never break the pasta. er?” already cut in half. with dolphins, cleaning Yes, dear readers, the fact that we’re Sarah: “No difference. Both are wrong. Or maybe it will. When I asked whether the attic and someday too lazy to break our own spaghetti is a Haha.” breaking the pasta makes it taste differ- overcoming the trauma of elementary school picture day. far less serious offense than the fact that Bob: “See. Do not break the pasta!” ently, people shared links to articles ex- She lives with two dogs, a cat, six chickens and one very anyone would dare to break spaghetti in Of course, some people love the half- plaining how it changes the way the sauce patient husband. Learn more at www.joannebrokaw.com.
February 2016 | REFRESHED 15 16 REFRESHED | February 2016