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FREE 07/09/00 Issue no: 984

Nurses & Midwifery Barearts - Reading Festival Review Win a stunt Freshers Feature p8 kite p4 p10 At Platform Four...... HELP Those of you who haven’t been Freshers week around for the last year will no doubt have noticed there have countdown begins been quite a number of con- struction changes on campus. In just 10 days, on Sunday 17th The first major change is the newly September, this University will once constructed Edward, Duke of Kent more be swamped with the arrival of Building, which is visible to the 100s of this years new 'little' first years masses all around Guildford, not (aka Freshers) with mummy, daddy, & just us students. The European bags in tow. Needless to say, we need Institute of Health and Medical a little help from you guys to move Science (EIHMS) is home to our them into their new residences and nurses, midwives and chiropratic give 'em a little insight into real student students. livin' and just for this we'll give you a bonus £15 and a free T-Shirt each for As well as the EIHMS the your efforts. University finished building their new catering service, the Hall Any student can get involved and it's Restuarant Complex in November always been a great laugh in the past 1999. This now offers a varied so you fancy getting a piece of the range of food at all price ranges. action then tootle on up to the Students Union and sign up at the Reception You may have seen that train-like desk or pop along to see Susie Westwell (VP Education & Welfare) in building near Yorkie’s Bridge and University Court Phase 4 wondering what earth it is? Well, the Sabb offices. this fine new construction is an extension to University CourtUnion also has with the newlySurrey populace. Further construc- accommodation, which will houserefurbished Helyn Rose Bar, recep-tion plans for the Students’ Union 200 students. Each flat has sixtion area and a newly laid floor ininclude the inclusion of an extra study bedrooms with ensuite bath-Haris. At the moment in the UnionATMmachine next to the original rooms and a shared kitchen.you may notice the constructionNatwest machine. University Court Phase 4 is aboutwork outside Chancellors where STOP PRESS!! 90% completed and will be finishedthe Sub Aqua store used to be.The Student Union’s food service by the end of September. This area will be converted intohas evolved over the summer, with offices for Ensleigh Insurance. Ina great new menu arriving inTHE FIRST STUDENT COUN- It’s not just the University whothe future Ensleigh will be occupy-Chancellors. Student demand hasCIL MEETING OF THE YEAR have been beavering away withing the space offering studentlead to the provision of a selectionWILL BE TAKING PLACE ON their construction projects, but theinsurance to the University ofof ‘healthy options’ which are avail-TUESDAY 12TH SEPTEMBER able now. AT 1PM IN THE STUDENTS’ But...If you’re feeling on the piggy UNION. side then visit the new HRB Express in the evening and try ourMEET YOUR NEW SABBATI- new range of burgers, hot dogs,CAL OFFICERS, ASK QUES- fish and chips. TIONS AND HEAR WHAT HAS On a sporting note the University ofHAPPENED IN YOUR UNION Surrey Golf Team were the proud OVER THE SUMMER. winners of BUSA beating a top Scottish side. EVERYONE IS WELCOME! This year is set to be one of the most exciting ever with great events lined up, so come along, getBarefacts Editorial Meeting involved and most importantly -7pm Monday 11th September, have fun!!! Grant Mitchell Room, EIHMS building (KM & LA) Students’ Union.

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2 News 07/09/00

Editorial gossip, and features. It’s ratherFinally, I would just like to say more of taster of things to come asthank you to all the contributors to like all good things it takesthis issue, otherwise I would not of The first thing I am going to say is Editorial Team time…but don’t worry it will be inbeen able to published it and most welcome back to those of you who Editorr the near future. Barefacts will fea-likely gone mad in the meantime. Kevin Marston Music Editorr are returning and hello, to those ofture campus stories, features,Anyway, that’s it from me, folks, you who are just starting. Hopefully Owen Hazelby music reviews, art reviews, sportuntil next time. Deputy Editorr you are all settling back into thefeatures as well as competitions Vacant Arts Editorr student lifestyle after the summerand events. Oh yeah, and in great tradition of months off. Certainly the people ChrisMorton Sesame Street, this week’s Production Editorr down Cindy’s on Monday were,So, if you want to write something,barefacts was brought to you in Sports Editor Andrew Thomas Sports Editor anyway. join the team, or raise an argumentassociation with the number 2 and Dave Chapman over an issue that you want heardthe letters b & c. News Editorr Well, here’s the first edition of Vacant Marketing Team then contact barefacts either by barefacts, a rather short one, Iposting a letter in the barefactsKevin Marston Vacant know and not particularly bursting mailbox or email us atVP Communications & Marketing Features Editorr at the seams with the latest news, Vacant [email protected].

Sabbaticals 2000 -2001 News In Breif

Fiona Wareham stations. 13 casualties were treated at the station for Government under fire over Dome heat and shock, whilst 3 were admitted to hospital. President The government is this week trying to fend off the tor- rents of criticism aimed at it after the announcement Big Brother Phenomenon that a further grant of £47 million has been allocated to the Millennium Dome. This comes at the same time as the failing attraction replaces its chairpersonAs the nation still sits and awaits the fate of Mel, for the second time in four months. Darren, Anna and Craig, the voyeuristic TV show KevinMarston receives massive ratings. This Friday sees all house- VP Communications mates except Anna up for eviction by public vote. & Marketing French Truckers In War over Fuel Tax Rates Bookies have this week touted Craig as the favourite to win the competition.

Recent roadblocks around French fuel depots and refineries, which have threatened air and road trans- Schools Covering Up Staff Shortages port, have resulted in an agreement between the pro- Susie Westwell testers and government. The draft called for the tax VP Education & per litre of fuel to drop by a further 25 centimes perAn NUT report out this week states that many British litre next year, although the truck drivers seem reti-schools have been covering up staff shortages Welfare cent to agree before their demands are met. Fuel sta-through the employment of unqualified staff and the tions have this week been guarded by police tomanipulation of the curriculum. The subjects most ensure the emergency services can run safely. likely to be understaffed are CDT, Maths, Foreign lan- guages and Physics.

Meg and Noel Split Luke Mackenzie To Resuscitate or Not to Resiscitate…That is the VP Finance & Question… Development Following hot on the heels of Liam Gallagher's split from Patsy Kensit, Meg Matthews and have this week announced that they are splitting upNew guidelines which have come out this week have after "drifting apart". eased the mounting fears amongst Britain’s older generations over the increasing rate of “Do Not Resuscitate” labeling in hospitals. The guidelines aim Ben McCauley Bush makes an ass of himself to counteract ageism in the NHS, an issue which Age VP Sports Concern view with the utmost of seriousness. New hospital resuscitation policies are being written as a George W. Bush made a fatal faux pas during his lastresult of the report. phase of campaigning for the imminent American elections when a live microphone picked up his com- ment "There's Adam Clymer, major league asshole Hermaphrodite Polar Bears from the New York Times." Lucy Andrews Whether this has pushed Al Gore ahead in the polls is yet to be seen. Concerned scientists in Svalbard in the Arctic have VP Societies & recently discovered that over 1% of the island’s polar Culture Underground Enquiry bears are hermaphroditic. These animals have the London Underground safety chiefs are this week look-reproductive organs of both sexes. This bizarre con- ing into how 2000 commuters became trapped fordition is thought to be caused by exposure to chemi- over two hours inside a sweltering tube train whichcal pollutants which damage the endocrine and halted in a tunnel between Bank and Liverpool Streetimmune system.

Bare Facts is an editorially independent newspa- © USSU Communications Office Bare Facts per, published by the University of Surrey Students' Union House Union Communications Office. 2000 University Of SurreyThe views expressed within the Deadline for paper are those of individual Guildford authors, and do not necessarily Publication Surrey represent the views of the Editor, Monday 12pm GU2 5XH the Editorial Board, the University of Surrey Students' Union or the University of Surrey. Printed by Tel: 01483 879275 Submissions Fax: 01483 534749This publication may not be reproduced in whole or East End Offset (TU),, in part, stored in any form, copied or distributed, preferably on without the express permission of the publisher. Bow, London, E3 3LT email: All submissions must include the author's name disk /email and Union or Staff Number. Submission is no [email protected] of publication. Anonymous and Pseudonymous articles will not be published. bf000907-1.qxd 9/11/00 10:44 Page 3

07/09/00 Letters 3 single night there are up to 8 campus security officers patrolling Fancy Having Your Say?? campus, even more on particular- ly busy nights on campus, securi- Your Letters Every year, a selection of brave individuals step for- ty cameras cover all routes on an wards and volunteer as Course Reps, that is, to be around campus, and lighting, representatives of their particular academic course Campus Safety happened. cameras, and pathways are and attend certain meetings to feed back the opin- checked regularly every month. ions of their course mates on the progress and Dear Editor, My friends and I have been underWe are constantly looking to quality of their studies. the misconception that campus isimprove any areas of lighting I am writing to you concerning ansafe. Obvisously campus is not which are inadequate and in the It's really important that each course is adequately incident of sexual assault which safe and this needs to be past few months much of the represented so that problems can be raised and occurred on campus in the last stressed to all students on cam-undergrowth has been cut back to ironed out, and issues affecting students' welfare, week of term. The incident pus particularly the first years. Iensure clear sight for cameras education and general well being can be addressed occurred after the Wednesday am not trying to cause panic butand pathways for pedestrians. through the proper channels. Night Out in the Union. My friendfeel if people were better informed was attacked walking back to herthey would act more responsibly.In direct response to Jo's letter, Make sure your course decides on a representative halls of residence when she was security employed by the and look out for news coming soon about Students' approached by a stranger. She If incidents do occur on campusStudents' Union cannot be Union training for course representatives. was walking with a large group ofthey should be announced openlyinsured to be placed around cam- people but left then when she so people can take extra precau-pus on busy nights. There was a reach her court. The man tions. A notice outside the Unionconsiderable increase in campus attacked her when she was alone,would be appropriate. At the timesecurity for those last busy nights dragged her into the bushes andwe were anxious for students of term however, and many extra assulted her. safety on the Thursday and Fridaysecurity officers were paid over- night out but had no way of time to patrol around campus in Another student came to her aidinforming people to be extra vigi-the hours of darkness. In the and she arrived at my room. Thislant. event of this particular incident, individual I am truly grateful too. security was considerably We called university security whoThere always appears to be an increased and so the decision arrived within ten minutes but theabundance of security staff withinwas made not to publicise the police were only called on my the direct vicinity of the Union atdetails of it in order to avoid creat- insistence that she had been closing time. Would it be possibleing mass panic and leading some attacked. I am unsure whether to place security staff at strategicof you to be unnecessarily scared security went to the actual pointpoints i.e., the main walkways of even being on campus. Such where she was attacked but therethrough campus, when the Uniondecisions are of course made at was vital evidence there which Closes? the time with the best intentions was never recovered due to for the welfare of students, and someone removing it. I am aware no where is 100% necessary measures will be taken safe but do think if this issue wasin future to inform students to be I do not mean to scare your read-dealt with more openly campus more vigilant if such a situation ers but assaults can happen on would be safer for subsequent were to arise where it were need- campus, I spent four wonderful students. ed. years at Surrey and have never felt intimidated walking around Yours Sincerely Issues of student safety are campus and to and from work. InJo Dickinson, 2000 Graduate always a great concern to all the last week of my final year it hit union officials and security staff, me that the campus is not as safe and this concern has been worry- as I thought it was. Please as stu- ingly increased over the past year dents be aware and as a student as a consequence of Wednesday body you should insist the Dear ALL, night cheap spirits promotions. University to provide more lighting We are sorry, but for this reason and make more of a presence ofIn response to these letters, the the union has had to change the security on campus as a deterrentchief of Campus Security has writ-Wednesday night promotion and and to make students feel safe.ten personally to the authors as which will no longer be for dou- they have now left university. I ambles&mixers. I am sure most of Kirstie Ormston writing this article, on behalf of theyou will be aware of the potential X-student nurse sabbatical team, to assure you consequences and implications that such things are never pushedthat vast quantities of high to one side and that issues of strength alcohol bought so cheap- security and personal safety of allly can have on a persons actions our students are taken extremelyand, as unpopular as some of you 13,000 Students Dear Sabbatical Team, seriously. may feel this decision to be, we would hope that you can under- = 1 Voice I have just completed my final As much as we can reassure youstand that this is a risk we can no year at Surrey and wish to thankthat Surrey campus is one of thelonger afford to take in terms of the University for four enjoyablesafest university campus's in thepersonal safety issues. To replace years. However, there is an issuecountry and that Surrey county this though there will still be differ- which I feel needs addressing forhas one of the lowest crime rates,ent drinks promotions on a the start of the new semester. I could not tell you that it is 100%Wednesday Night, a regular bottle safe from all possible danger, bank and look out for our exclu- At the end of last semester my nowhere in the world could do sive Wacky Wednesday feature friend was sexually assaulted that. I can however tell you thatbeginning in Freshers week. whilst on campus. The incident the Students' Union and Campus occurred on the last Wednesdaysecurity are 100% committed to Susie Westwell night out when my friend walkeddoing everything we possibly canVP Education and Welfare home from the Union. Although to make it as safe a place as pos-(on behalf of the Sabbatical she walked home alone, which sible, both in terms of informing Team) with hindsight was ill advised, you all of what you can do to there were lots of other people assure your own personal safety about. My friend was dragged intoand in terms of patrolling, lighting the bushes near Surrey Court andand surveillance we can provide. attacked. Had it not been for the intervention by a group of lads II have spoken to security person- dread to think what would have ally and can assure you that every barefacts bf000907-1.qxd 9/11/00 10:44 Page 4

Nurses Feature 4 07/09/00

THE ESSENTIALS … BREAD ANDneeds etcetera Nurses & Midwifery BEER the University Freshers Week houses a special- You will undoubtedly find our wide arrayist Student This week Bare Facts offers a massiveof bars and catering facilities within yourAdvice and welcome to over 200 new Nursing andfirst weeks. These include the newlyInformation Midwifery freshers undertaking degreesrefurbished Helyn Rose Bar with itsService (SAIS). and diplomas at the University ofdaytime servery and nighttime fast-foodThere is a dedi- Surrey. Coming to University can be awindow, the Chancellors restaurant withcated Health daunting experience but never fear,its more cosmopolitan yet affordableCentre on cam- there's plenty to see and do, and lots ofrange of snacks, salads, pastas andpus, and for support to help you throughout yourpuddings, the Union bar, Pitstop sand-deeper rooted time here. wich shop, Promo bar (on Friday nights)problems please and Hari's bar. All tastes and walletvisit the Student During your first week you will find your-sizes are catered for, and you'll soonCounselling self attending seemingly endless talkssee that the Union bars and outlets areService. For free and registration sessions, but nevera major employer of Surrey students.condoms or tam- fear, there's more to life than filling in pons, and some- GOOD LUCK AND HAVE FUN!! forms! The Students' Union is here to HELP IS AT HAND one to talk to or ask advice from at night provide a place for you to relax, social- then try calling Nightline on 01483So, there's plenty to do, as if your ize, eat and drink, book your travel, joinIf you have any problems whilst settling876999, or extension 6999. The Vice-course won't provide you with more sports clubs and student societies, get in, or at any point during your studiesPresident Education and Welfare, Susiethan enough to work on!! Make the advice about a range of issues and findthere are many different avenues ofWestwell, is also available to help withmost out of your time at Surrey, make employment. assistance to explore. For informationacademic appeals and advice. lots of friends and don't live a on financial hardship, benefits, special little….LIVE A LOT! The Ultimate Fried Breakfast It is almost guaranteed that every new fresher will overindulge at some time over the next fortnight…saying that, it's inevitable that most continuing students will also overindulge, and its commonly acknowledged that the best way to recover the next day is to demolish the Surrey favourite - a high cholesterol, diet crush- ing breakfast.

Ingredients: Utensils:

1 Egg Frying Pan & oil Handful of mushrooms, Tin Foil 2 large tomatoes Saucepan Tin of beans Spatula & Tongs Slices of bread Wooden Spoon 2 Sausages Plate, Knife & Fork Optional -Hash brown Black puddingSalt & Pepper

1) Turn your grill on - and hob if electric (both on medium) 2) Place a layer of tin foil with the sides folded up on the tray. 3) Put the sausages under the grill for 5 minutes before you start frying. 4) Cut the mushrooms into slices - peel them first and rinse them if you wish 5) Cut the Tomatoes into halves 6) Place the Frying pan on the hob 7) Add a tablespoon of olive oil or a lump of butter into the pan. Heat till it melts. 8) Turn sausages 9) Throw in the mushrooms and Tomatoes - add more butter/oil if required. 10) Let them fry, add salt and pepper to taste! 11) Put bread into toaster 12) Put the beans into a saucepan and start heating them up 13) Your mushrooms should be a golden colour. If they are then crack the egg and fry, add more butter/oil if required - you don't want your egg to stick to the pan! 14) Check Sausages and stir beans again 15) Grab the plate - butter the toast and dadaaa, one health defying breakfast!.

Entertainments Saturday 16th:Helyn Rose Bar Disco £2 Sunday 17th:Sunday NIght Live featuring Trayscrape & Manchild (Free) What would the first week at university be without a vast array of entertainments, and gratuitous excusesMonday 18th: Ten Ton Polar Bear - Ice Breaker to go out and mingle? Freshers & New Nurses Only Here’s your selection for the forthcoming weeks: Tuesday 19th: Unplugged on Union Main Stage Monday 11th: Nurses Disco - Helyn Rose Bar Free 9-12 Free entry (Freshers Only) Wednesday 20th: Wacky Wednesday Foam Party Tuesday 12th: Chancellors Challenge Quiz £1 per player Thursday 21st:The Big Pub Quiz

Wednesday 13th: Wacky Wednesday 9pm -2am Friday 22nd: Friday Night Out featuring £2 b4 10.30/ £3 after B*Witched

Thursday 14th:Bars open Saturday 23rd:No Wave Indie & Alternative Night Helyn Rose Bar Friday 15th: Friday Night Out 9pm -2am £2 b4 10.30/ £3 after Sunday 24th: Sunday Night Live featuring Cut la Roc bf000907-1.qxd 9/11/00 10:44 Page 5

07/09/00 HRB Refurbishment 5

The Helyn Rose ...the...the angstangst riddenridden thoughtthoughts Development of Rich W Well, hello and welcome back to those of you who As summer kicked in and our Sabbatical went away, and to those of you who didn’t, then reign began so we set about planning what ignore what I just said. It’s not me being rude or any- to do with the Students’ Union and ourselves thing (there’s time for that later), but if you didn’t go anywhere, then maybe there’s no point in welcoming with no students about to keep us occupied. you back really – it would just be, well, pointless. We decided, unanimously, that the Helyn Rose Bar was in need of some tender loving We may all be looking forward to the new academic care in order to transform it from the dull and year, what with the masses of motivation we’ve all dingy hole that it had become into a warm stored up over the summer of sam, but it is with true despair that I feel I must inform you of a recent devel- and welcoming venue. Some smart arse (oh,Ben(VP Sports) & Susie(VP Education & Welfare) get Stuck in with the revamping the HRB opment that will dampen even the most spirited that might have been me!) then had the idea amongst us. that it would be a great team building exer- cise to give it a coat of paint ourselves, not What is it that you despair about? I hear you lovely quite so unanimously agreed initially! people cry…is it that uncharacteristically squidgy, probably avoidable chin-merd you just stepped in? Is Choosing paint colours proved to be the it the lack of clean underwear? Is it, heavens forbid, most difficult part of the whole job but with the new Savage Garden single?Alas, no – it is none that finally achieved we all donned our paint- of the above, for it is truly worse. (Hard as it may ing gear and set about our task. seem, there is something in the world marginally more dire than a new release of Savage Garden, although, inevitably, these occurrences are close run It was, needless to say, not quite the hassle things). free mission we had at first assumed! But two weeks and about 50 litres of paint later This atrocity is the news that Tescos, that great we could finally stand back and admire our plethora of food and all things delicatessen-like, The new look food servery inside the HRB handy work. have introduced the ultimate trolley nicking deter- rent: a front – right wheel that, once removed from the premises of the conniving buggers, will simply It is not only the look of the Helyn Rose Bar lock and move no more. that has dramatically altered over the sum- mer. Those of you returning will no doubt join I know, I know, it’s a difficult thing to deal with at the us in bidding a fond farewell to Pizza + but in start of a new semester, but deal with it we must, for food and shopping are absolute necessities, just like the same breath welcome with open arms masturbation. (I appreciate, girls, that you might pre- the all new HRB Express. This fast food style fer shopping, but you really should try masturbation service will open at 7.30pm every evening at least once – it can be quite good fun…just ask a offering a rangeof hot food to take away. man).

Anyways, we can all take solace in the fact that our arm muscles will bulge with each weekly shop, and our appeal to the opposite sex will manifest itself with The HRB Express every extra can of value beans or loaf of value bread in the shopping bag. HRBExpress Food Menu If that doesn’t sound like much of a cheer up, then try this for size 12 gingham cardigan on for size: whilst browsing through one of the many clearing lists MEAL DEALS Hot Dog £1.50 advertising spare uni courses recently, I noticed an opportunity to study “fashion knitwear design” at the Jumbo sausage & Chips £1.80 normally quite reputable Nottingham Trent facility. So All burgers served in a floured bap with ice-if you ever get the feeling that maybe you’re not quite ½ LB Burger & Chips £2.75 berg lettuce and tomato cut out for a ‘proper’ degree course (ie, one where ½ LB Cheeseburger & Chips£3.00 your career aspirations don’t involve itchy, flecky, ½ LB Chicken Fillet Burger EXTRAS Christmas-jumpers-type pieces of wool) then spare a & Chips £3.75 thought for those poor drop-one-carry-one-souls ½ LB Spicy Bean Burger who are beavering away with their knitting needles. Battered Cod £2.20 For most will never achieve more than a nice scarf & Chips £3.50 Onion Rings £1.00 for their teddy bear, or perhaps a subscription to Battered Cod & Chips £2.75 Chips small £1.00 “Knitting Fortnightly” for those who achieve a first. Chicken Nuggets & Chips £2.85 Chips large £1.50 Who is it that says Britain doesn’t lead the way in fur- Vegetable Nuggets & Chips £2.40 Chicken Nuggets £2.25 ther education? Damn europhiles. Scampi & Chips £3.20 Vegetable Nuggets £1.80 Disclaimer: as you may have gathered, I received Chicken & Mushroom pie Chicken & Mushroom Pie £1.60 more than my fair share of wooly, knitted jumpers & Chips £2.40 Jumbo Sausage £1.20 from grandma at Christmas, and so as a result, may Portion Beans £0.50 have been a little harsh on the knitting public of BURGERS & HOT DOGS Portion Peas £0.70 Great Britain. I therefore should apologise, not only to those clicky-clicky people at Nottingham Trent, but Scampi £2.20 also to my granny, whom I love very much. ¼ LB Beefburger £1.60 Pickled Gherkins £0.50 ¼ LB Cheeseburger £1.75 Pickled Onions ¼ LB Chicken Fillet Burger £2.10 £0.50 The above written text is not meant to harm or offend ¼ LB Spicy Bean Burger £1.75 anyone. ½ LB Beefburger £2.10 Come and try out this new delicious menu ½ LB Cheeseburger £2.25 ½ LB Chicken Fillet Burger £3.25 ½ LB Spicy Bean Burger £2.80 bf000907-1.qxd 9/11/00 10:44 Page 6

Advert 6 07/09/00

Are you interested in writing articles on student related topics?

Then get in contact with the barefacts team as we are looking for willing student writers for the following sections;

News, Features, Music, & Arts

We are also looking for students to help out on the production side of barefacts.

So if you want to get involved with barefacts contact us at [email protected], or ring the barefacts tele- phone, 01483 879275 (ext 81-9275). Alternatively you could come to our editorial meetings on Mondays at 7pm in the Grant Mitchell room in the Students’ Union. be heard

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07/09/00 Careers Information 7

The Careers Library is definitely worth a Dr Russ visit. A good place to start would be to look at the file marked “Your degree….. Dear Russ What next? which you’ll see as soon as you walk in through the door. This will I’ve just got back and I am in a panicgive you ideas about what to do when about fitting in job hunting with my you leave. You could even have a go on final year studies. Got any good our “careers” computer. By the way, advice? careers advisers and information staff are always around to help you should you Dear Andrew, need it.

Your first option could be to delay the There is one final thing you should know. whole career thing until after you gradu-If you would like a job straight after you ate. There are good reasons, though, forgraduate and would like to work for one doing some of your thinking and prepara-of the major graduate employers like tion while you’re still here. Mars or Esso, then you simply have to meet their deadlines, often before For a start, there are loads of things Christmas, to stand any chance. Early going on at Surrey over the next few applications for other options such as months which you might find really help-teacher training are also advisable. Our ful. For example, we have our annual Vacancy Bulletin, which you can view on Careers Fair on Thursday 5 October www.mis.surrey.ac.uk/misweb/careers/ho when you could talk informally to peopleme.htmwill keep you up to date with their from about 50 organisations. We have requirements. also planned a series of talks throughout the semester by careers staff and invitedI know from personal experience how speakers. You could come along to a tough it is fitting everything in to your final seminar to sharpen up your interview year. But, if you plan your time carefully, technique or you could try a practice apti-I’m convinced there are many advan- tude test. tages to be gained from using all that the Careers Service has to offer. If you’d like to know more about any of these things – why not pick up a copy ofRuss Clark our Autumn Careers Programme from Careers Service your department or from Careers. This year we have once again produced a Career Planning Guide which is already available in Careers. In case you haven’t visited us before, we live next to the Accommodation Office in the Philip Marchant Building. bf000907-1.qxd 9/11/00 10:44 Page 8

8 Music 07/09/00

on the Evening Session stage to a rammedare safe, tent. ‘Hit’ (about “having a hit”), and ‘Shorty’unlike the (about “being short”), are instantly catchy andsecurity pogo infused. ‘The You and Me Song’ makeswho get it’s appearance late on and everyone leavespeppered happy. Being happy is not an issue for thewith sh*t, lit- Carling Premier tent’s headliners, Queenerally. Two they do and everyone behaves for at leastAdrena. A woman with roses in her hair andsongs later Reading Festivall ten seconds before slamming their matewearing a baby doll dress is wailing to a sub-(‘Ooh Stick sonic assault provided by her pantomimeYou’ and Andrew Thomas again during ‘I’ll Stick Around’. No such prob- Ian Brown lem during the next band, Primal Screambacking band (the drummer is dressed as a‘Ugly’ - aren’t noted for their mosh pits. The sound isred indian for crying out loud!). Everyone heretaunting Friday groovy and the fans dance whilst the intelli-is very angry. Grrr. Slipknot fans has never been so much fun) A sunny day greets the campers as they col-gensia stand at the back and debate the they get pulled off. The security relax, for all of lapse out of their tents suffering from burntPrimal’s reflection of modern society integrat-Sunday five minutes because then Blink182make plastic fume headaches and hangoversed with the technology that surrounds them.With everyone somewhat smellier than whentheir entrance and the crowd surfers flood in. acquired the night before. The arena opensHmmm. The newer material sounds sothey arrived it seems appropriate for SundayNot smart or clever the band give us their and half the site attempts to enter, onceexpansive it could swallow a galaxy, the onlyon the main stage to be official day of rawk.entire knowledge of England (The Smiths through it’s a rush to the main stage todownside being it makes their early material,Starting off proceedings are the youthful teenand Austin Powers) and eventually become see....Boss Hog. Probably taken aback byespecially ‘Rocks’, sound utterly feeble inspirited My Vitriol, who should be huge butendearing for their scheer moronic comedy the eagerness of the collective festival virginscomparison. Leaving Primal Scream towill probably need to slog America for a fewvalue. Rage Against The Machineare still enthusiasm they entertain best they can.watch Shed 7initially seems comparable toyears to then be repackaged for us to buy.raging against the same things they were six Slack Doors-like riffs and a drawl that some-swapping your Nike Airs for a pair of flip flops,Following them are last year’s My Vitriol, Cay,years ago as we make our way to the Carling times collapses to Mark E Smith levels keepsbut once within the confines of the Eveningexcept instead premier tent for Angelica. Things have been the teenage massive jumping up and down going well for the 4 piece all girl guitar band Session stage you actually realise you areof pushing the Cay but for others it’s time to look elsewhere. Inenjoyingyourself. Hit after hit is rattled out, theHole-like since their single ‘Bring Back Her Head’ got the Evening Session tent the circus haspacked tent singing along to everything, fromgrunge outfit lodged on the Evening Session playlist for come to town. King Adoraprobably consid-the arm waving ‘Chasing Rainbows’ to the lol-around the weeks. They sound like Sleater Kinney gar- er themselves to be generation terrorists forlaping ‘She Left Me On Friday’. It seems rightworld their label rotting Kenickie with a spare guitar string, the new millenium, yelping boy singer inthey kept their modest songs for a modestsimply gave up edgy and intense but still retaining a pop make-up included, but they come over moreaudience. Unlike, say, Oasis, who are wailingand dropped sparkle. Slipknotcan be heard grunting in like (minus ten years).away on the main stage with less soul than athem. Back on the distance as Lauren Lavernetakes to the Whatever they are, they definitely have thevampire convention. They go through thelo-fi under- stage, accompanied by her brother, crowd involved. The songs may be moremotions, it’s been years since they’ve doneground label, boyfriend, and assorted friends skulking in Bolan than Bloodhound Gang but still a slamanything else. Org, they still the background. Talking to the crowd as if she pit develops (during the new single ‘Big Isn’t sound like Hole, but even more dated. Awas still speaking to a Planet Pop camera it’s Beautiful’), we’re at Reading and we want toSaturday quick trip across to the Evening Sessionall very amusing but at the moment the songs ROCK! Speaking of which a big man in even stage finds indie b-league superstarsare a bit weak, especially compared to her bigger shorts and a backwards baseball capIn the drizzle The Delgadoesare out to play on the main stage. It’s an easy start with bigLinoleumstill playing one song ten times,Mint Royale collaboration ‘Don’t Falter’. Later has just strode onto the main stage. on the Carling Premier tent plays host to ice- strings and boy/girl vocals, passionate andwith the worthy exception of new single ‘You’re Back Again’, which belongs on a lowlandic pop punks Bellatrix, a band who you ....the showbiz and glitter is blastedconcentrated. Following them are the ever quirky Gorkys Zygotic Mynci, awkwardbudget art film. can’t help but love. Eighties synth with fuzzy guitars and a singer with an operatic range across the crowd as some sort ofalmost pop songs complete with that camp ironic statement.... Welsh vocal. Shuffling over to the Evening....they come out and immediatelycarry the pop hooks with ease. They look a bit Session stage new big things JJ72are plow-bottles, fruit, chunks of mud, andcrazy, maybe they put something in the ice- landic water (see Bjork). Concluding the night A month ago no one except the moreing through their epic-lite debut . The even a smokebomb make their air-Ian Brownis horsely whispering his way extreme individuals in No Wave would haverecord deserves the hype, however live theborne journey to the stage...... heard of them. But then they got involved withlack of on stage activity slowly numbs the through a set in the Evening Session tent. His cover of ‘Billy Jean’ is suprisingly good and a small film project known as Missionaudience. No such numbing on the smallest Impossible 2. So yes, Limp Bizkitare herestage in the Carling Premier tent however,There’s a lot of noise coming from the mainonce he gets into his singles the crowd chant and they want to make some NOIZE! LeadFifth Amendmentare on. Comprising dirtystage and it doesn’t sound too friendly. Thathis name between every one. will be because cheesy hi-fi pop duo turned singer Fred Durst shouts out, the crowd shoutfat fuzz pedals and thundering drum loops it’s back, then the band kick in with three noteCurve with less brains and more balls, somesubversive practicioners of new cool ironyThis leaves us to return to the churned up bass riffs whilst he yap-whines over the topsongs melting in to others in an industrialDaphne and Celesteare on next. It seemsbattlezone of a campsite and watch as the almost cruel, they come out and immediatelynearby portaloos go up in a burst of flame like a particularly small dog barking at thesoup. The NME often champions hideous postman. Then out comes the showbiz andbands for lack of anything else to do. One ofbottles, fruit, chunks of mud, and even aand the lighting gets pulled to the floor. After glitter is blasted across the crowd as somethese are Terris, a shallow near-baggy expe-smokebomb make their airborne journey toall, Limp Bizkit told us to ‘Break Stuff’. the stage. But the stage is deep and the girls sort of ironic statement. You have to loverience with an irritating “I’m mad me” front them, but don’t take them too seriously. Howman. This is likely to be the first and last time do you follow up hardcore rap metal action?anyone ever hears of them. Unlike Black Easy, you bring on The Bluetones!Box Recorder, who walk onto the Evening Somehow changing from non-stop knuckleSession stage dressed as aircrew and take dragging aggression to mid tempo happy gous on a “musical flightpath”. Once they’ve lucky britpop fallout is remarkably easy. It’splayed ‘The Facts of Life’ people start to drift but it’s obvious that this will not be the last we hear of them. The crowd grows at the main stage as Elasticaarrive. Justine still looks as slack jawed as ever and the six piece yank their way through material from ‘The Menace’. It’s the early hits that work though, ‘Waking Up’, ‘Connection’, and ‘Vaseline’ all

The Bluetones send out the right signals. Now if only their keyboard player actually did something other time to lay back and soak in the odes to lov-than pogo about in her grandad’s shirt and ing cars and losing your girlfriend. But not forjeans they might gain the crucial extra angle too long. Foo Fightersdebuted at Readingto move their music on a stage. Watching some five years ago and a lot of people gotBecklive is like a stage version of Later With squashed in the tiny tent they played in. NowJools Holland, only good. His army of musi- on the main stage, mild mannered Davecians jam away as he judders and bumbles Grohl is practising safety first to avoid a repeatto the funky rhythm. Lyrically Beck is either an in light of Roskilde. “Get back” he calls to theinsane genius of merely insane, whatever, his crowd as they jump on each other duringcharisma and humour carries them effort- Top left: Lauren Laverne, Top right: Daphane gets escorted away under protec- ‘This Is A Call’, they whoop and cheer. “Don’tlessly. Humour is most definitely a necessity clap, just get the F**k back!” he shouts. Sowhen it comes to The Wannadies, playingtion. Bottom left: Slipknot fans showing their faces, Bottom right: Reading Main Stage bf000907-1.qxd 9/11/00 10:44 Page 9

07/09/00 Societies 9

Iain: [email protected]

Technical SocietieSocietiessRoland has the wonderful mission of constructing the new studio and being responsible for the relocation of the old. The job in hand is huge and if that sort of thing Profilesturns you on email [email protected] Training GU2 1350AM For training purposes, broadcasting will continue from Radio made for students, the old studios until they’re taken down for relocation. This will allow everybody to get back into the swing of by students. things and will make the transition between old and new much easier. Shows will be recorded and Station Manager: reviewed so we can see what’s what and hand out Gareth Davies ([email protected]) tips. Also every presenter will receive a brand new training manual with all you need to know. If you have This semester will be very important for the launch ofany training queries or you’d like to help with that side GU2. The committee are dedicated and have and willof things contact Ben Davenport : spend hours with the station, but launching GU2 [email protected] [email protected] scratch is a huge task. After months of waiting and swapping contracts ourProgramming Website new aerial has been purchased and we are closerIf you’d are available and would like to host a showWe’ve got the domain name but we’ve got no content. than ever to launching the new station!! It will be locat-this term please send full details of what you’d like toAny suggestions? Like [email protected] Also ed downstairs at Battersea court reception and will rundo (format, music/speech ratio, specialist/mainstreamwe hope to be streaming GU2 across the Net. a 24 hour news and music service on 1350am startingetc.) and your full contact details so we can sort out a soon. slot and get you on the key list. Email to program-News [email protected] Lack of a media course in the Uni means we have no If you’re interested then get in touch – There’s always steady supply of wannabe journalists. Would anybody room for new faces! be interested in setting up a small campus news ser- Publicity vice? We can cover local and campus news and pro- Music Very important. People need to know, and everyonevide a comprehensive UniS sports results service. We receive between 20 - 40 singles a week. Iain Maccan do this… posters, e-mails, talking and running is the man with the job. If you love music and you canevents… If you have any suggestions or mad publici- spare a few hours to help review, assist in the con-ty stunts you want to try or you have spare time to dis- struction of playlists and fill in reaction sheets emailtribute flyers and posters email Duncan -

EXCEPTIONALLY INTERESTING NOTICE FOR ALL SOCIETY Notices MEMBERS Cheerleading Society Committee Meeting As you're probably aware there are a few meetings Thursday 14th September@ 6.30pm in Foyer of you are required to attend as a representative of your Union society. Teaching Blocks

All arts and entertainments societies will need to attend Arts and Ents committee, furthermore known as Culture and Events committee which is taking Sub Aqua place on Monday 11th September at 5pm in the Training Officer to be appointed for Sub Aqua for Grant Mitchell Room in the Union. 2000-2001

All societies need to come to Societies Standing Committee at 6pm on Monday 11th September in Lecture Theatre E. We'll be electing new societies Union Guests Sign in Times officers at this meeting so please consider if you Union members guests need to be signed in at want to get involved. We will also be discussing Union reception by 10.30pm on Monday, Tuesday, your society's budget, and how to present yourselvesThursday & Sunday. Whilst on Wednesady, Friday at Freshers Fayre. & Saturday guests must be signed in by 7.30pm.

You also need to come along to Student Council, as its THE most important meeting we hold in the Union. The first council meeting is at 1pm on Foundation & Special Entry Tuesday 12th September on the Union dance floor. Students Can pick up their temporary membership cards to Feel free to drop in and chat if you've got any ques- the Union at the USSU Reception. tions

Lucy Andrews Vice President Societies and Culture [email protected] 01483 873922 September 12th - 1pm

Student Council@The Students Union bf000907-1.qxd 9/11/00 10:44 Page 10

10 Fun 07/09/00

all over the place. Chill out or you’ll go blind! ASTROLOGICAL ALEXANDRA’SUnlucky object:- A pair of dark glasses PREDICTIONS OF THE WEEK Sagittarius (Nov 22-Dec 21) Aries (March 21-April 19) lecture is zero. You find yourself in a weird mood this week. You can’t decide what you really want to do, so settle for Run for cover!! The summer has been so relaxing Unlucky object:- An alarm clock a compromise. Make sure you think for yourself for you that work seems to be a pretty disgusting concept. At least Barefacts is still small enough toLeo (July 23-August 22) and keep smiling. Unlucky object:- A wet fish read in lectures. Rah! Your lion-like qualities emerge to the fore this Unlucky object:- A list of coursework deadlines week as you prowl the campus. Gather your pride together and pounce…..you know you want to! Capricorn (Dec 22-Jan 19) The goat of the zodiac is attacking the world horns- Unlucky object:- A rhino first!! You’ve really thrown yourself back into Taurus (April 20-May 20) September sees you stampeding towards your stud-Virgo (August 23-Sept 22) University life, although your hooves are sticking in the mud when it comes to love. Be good to your- ies like a bull in a china shop. Chill out, have a Fortune has it that you’re due for a birthday… self, go forth and multiply!! laugh and watch out for a tall dark stranger in Mystical forces will find you tarting and partying Cindies next week. All is not as it seems. around the Union this week. Temperatures are hot-Unlucky Object:- Chris Tarrant Unlucky Object:- A stiletto shoe ting up and so are you!! Aquarius (Jan 20-Feb 18) Unlucky object:- Cold shower Horny little devils!! Take your mind off the fact that freshers arrive soon, and start thinking about the Gemini (May 21-June 20) joys of a new academic year… a new pencil case “The hills are alive” – You feel like singing and danc-Libra (Sept 23-Oct 22) ing for some unintelligible reason. Not even you A balanced individual like yourself would normally and lined A4!! Unlucky object:- Automatic pencil sharpener know why you’re feeling quite so hyperactive but run a mile from public humiliation, but you feel an make the most of it!! insatiable urge to flash your pants at Friday Night Unlucky item:- A crate of Solstis Out this week. Fight the feeling and keep your bumPisces (Feb 19-March 20) Renowned as the sign with the most addictive tem- to yourself! perament, Pisceans will find themselves gravitating Unlucky object:- A pink thong Cancer (June 21-July 22) towards Chancellors patio this week. Resist the temptation or succumb to the greater force….it’s up This week is perfect for making new friends, not that to you! Cancerians have problems in this department. YouScorpio (Oct 23-Nov 21) are feeling at your most sociable… so sociable in Stop looking at breasts! Whilst it’s obviously very Unlucky object:- Your new timetable fact that the likelihood of making it to a 9 ‘o clock exciting being at university, your eyes are straying

Competition CornerVACANCIES FULL TIME & PART TIME Competition 1. EVENINGS, WEEKENDS LUNCH TIMES

Win an Activate Stunt Kite!!!! HOURS TO SUIT BENEFITS INCLUDE FREE MEALS, CAR PARKING, HOLIDAY PAY, BONUSES £5.62 per Hour* by answering this simple question (Fri, Sat and Sun evenings after 6pm) What search engines can you use to find a part time job on activate.co.uk?

Please send your answers to barefacts via email to £4.50 per Hour [email protected] by 6pm Monday 11th September 2000. (Starting rate at all other times)

hint: look at activate website Burger King North Street Competition 2. Burger King Ladymead

We have 2 pairs of tickets to win for the Chinese State Circus Retail Park in Aldershot. (By the A3/Wooden Bridge) All you have to do is answer the following question Guildford What Chinese year is this year?

Please send your answers to barefacts via email to [email protected] by 6pm Monday 11th September 2000. Drop in and fill in an application form today! Or Phone 01483-539822 / 01483-579311 bf000907-1.qxd 9/11/00 10:44 Page 11

General 07/09/00 11 EARN £30 OPEN DAY Wednesday 27th September

We need helpers and guides on 27thSeptember to make our Open Day a huge success once again.

If you are available between 9.00am and 3.30pm and would like to earn some extra cash, please contact:

Kat Gilbertson Office of Recruitment, Communications and Marketing Ground Floor, Senate House

01483 873937 (or ext 3937) e-mail [email protected]

We also need helpers to set up on Tuesday 26th September from 5.00 - 7.00

International students should be aware that a work permit will be required

PERSONALS

- Look out for that post, B.... d’oh

- You should always look where you going especial- ly when using the moblie

- I am back, H. Shall we do the same this year? DD

- Fu*ked again, another good night lads, hey

If you have anymore gossip you would like to share with your fellow students, then send your personals to [email protected] bf000907-1.qxd 9/11/00 10:44 Page 12

WANTED Freshers Week Helpers

£15 + a free T-Shirt

You are needed to help the Freshers move in on Sunday 17th September and help with 1 other thing during the week.

Any minibus drivers avaliable for this day, contact Ben McCauley in the Students’ Union

Please sign up at the Students’ Union Reception or see Susie Westwell, VP Education & Welfare

Sports Standing 6pm Tuesday 12th Semptember, Lecture Theatre E