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A Practical Guide for Pastors, Helping Abusers Break the Cycle of Sexual Abuse

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A Practical Guide for Pastors, Helping Abusers Break the Cycle of Sexual Abuse LIBERTY UNIVERSITY BAPTIST THEOLOGICAL SEMINARY THE UNSPOKEN TRUTH: A PRACTICAL GUIDE FOR PASTORS, HELPING ABUSERS BREAK THE CYCLE OF SEXUAL ABUSE A Thesis Project Submitted to Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary In partial fulfillment of the requirements For the degree DOCTOR OF MINISTRY By TERESA S. JOHNSON Lynchburg, Virginia March, 2015 Copyright © 2015 by Teresa S. Johnson All Rights Reserved ii LIBERTY UNIVERSITY BAPTIST THEOLOGICAL SEMINARY THESIS PROJECT APPROVAL SHEET ________________________________ GRADE ________________________________ MENTOR Dr. Charles N. Davidson Director, Doctor of Ministry Assistant Professor of Counseling ________________________________ READER Dr. David W. Hirschman Acting Dean Assistant Professor of Religion iii ABSTRACT THE UNSPOKEN TRUTH: A PRACTICAL GUIDE FOR PASTORS, HELPING ABUSERS BREAK THE CYCLE OF SEXUAL ABUSE Teresa S. Johnson Liberty Baptist Theological Seminary, 2014 Mentor: Dr. Charles N. Davidson For years, men, women and children have suffered silently as a result of sexual abuse. The abuser suffers and the cycle continues. Destroying the silence of sexual abuse is the beginning of breaking the cycle. Research has shown that the abuse goes far beyond the actual act and causes physical, emotional, and psychological damage. This project will investigate and encourage open discussion, address the abuse, and give valuable insight to the causes and consequences of sexual abuse. This project will offer prescriptive and preventative measures to all parties involved, in an effort to heal and stop sexual abuse. Through research based on surveys to churches throughout Maryland, Washington, D.C. and Virginia, the author will present a practical guide for helping abusers break the cycle. The sexual abuse cycle can be stopped and prevented through pastoral counseling techniques to assist both the abuser and the abused. iv DEDICATION I give honor to my Heavenly Father, Who has guided me throughout this journey. Without the leading of the Holy Spirit and His wisdom, I would have never been able to see this project to completion. I realize timing is everything and the set time is now. I thank God for using me as an agent for change, whether small or great, and for trusting me to tackle such an issue. To my husband Eric Johnson, thank you for your continued support, love, and encouragement throughout this process. I appreciate your patience and many sacrifices. To Ericka Johnson, thank you for being the most amazing daughter. You have encouraged me, motivated and assisted me in every way possible throughout this process. You are a godsend, my true blessing. To The Honorable Judge Angela Roberts, thank you for encouraging me to pursue my passion while I stuttered through talking about the subject with you. Because of your passionate plea for me to go forward, lives will be forever changed. To Dr. Charlie N. Davidson, thank you for supporting me throughout the initial stages of choosing a topic that matters to me, even when it didn’t prove to be a favorable decision among many options. The day you asked everyone in class to close our eyes, my eyes were open to the understanding that we all have experienced sexual abuse in our lives or families at some point or another, and I believe many strongholds were broken. To Dr. Philip R. McFarland, you stepped in at the brink of my exhaustion and lifted my spirits immediately. I appreciate your kind spirit, your generous support, assistance and expertise in helping to make this project a success. v To Dr. Rod Earls, I am grateful for your patience and for everything you did to assist me in a short window of time. To Roxanne Ledbetter, thank you for your determination in seeing this project to completion. Your loyalty, friendship, and participation along my journey meant a great deal. To Jordan Douglas Kemp, thank you for being my ram in the bush and for caring enough to want to help me make this document the best work possible. vi CONTENTS ABSTRACT ........................................................................................................................iv DEDICATION ....................................................................................................................v CONTENTS ........................................................................................................................vii ABBREVIATIONS ............................................................................................................x INTRODUCTION ..............................................................................................................1 Statement of the Problem .........................................................................................2 Statement of Limitations ..........................................................................................3 Theoretical Basis for the Project ..............................................................................4 Statement of Methodology .......................................................................................6 Review of Literature ..............................................................................................10 CHAPTER I LET THE CONVERSATION BEGIN ........................................................ 27 Sexual Crimes against Children .............................................................................32 Incest ......................................................................................................................40 Child Marriage .......................................................................................................46 Molestation ............................................................................................................48 Rape .......................................................................................................................50 Human Sex Trafficking..........................................................................................55 Sexual Abuse .........................................................................................................58 CHAPTER 2 HEALING FROM THE INSIDE OUT ................................................ 62 When Offenders Speak ..........................................................................................64 Recognizing Deception ..........................................................................................71 Recovery from Abuse ............................................................................................75 Church Leaders and their Conviction ....................................................................79 vii Forgiveness ............................................................................................................85 CHAPTER 3 PRESCRIPTIVE MEASURES .............................................................. 89 What We All Need to Know ..................................................................................93 Awareness Tips ......................................................................................................97 Common Characteristics of Sex Offenders..........................................................102 Change is Possible ...............................................................................................107 CHAPTER 4 PREVENTATIVE MEASURES.......................................................... 111 Prevention or Protection ......................................................................................112 Treatment .............................................................................................................114 Measuring Improvement and Recovery ...............................................................117 Manipulation ........................................................................................................118 Secrecy .................................................................................................................120 Prevention Programs ............................................................................................121 Prevention Taught in the Classroom ....................................................................124 Community Involvement .....................................................................................125 The Victim’s Needs .............................................................................................128 Child Sexual Abuse and the Law .........................................................................131 Children’s Advocacy Centers ..............................................................................132 CHAPTER 5 BREAKING THE CYCLE ................................................................... 134 Sexual Abuse: Illness or Sin ................................................................................138 Breaking the Silence ............................................................................................143 Free will ...............................................................................................................145 Where the Church is Today .................................................................................148 viii Clergy as Mandatory ............................................................................................154 State Statutes ........................................................................................................155 Statute of Limitations ...........................................................................................157
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