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.email list, please contact the Queer Sexuality Organiser, Kns Coonan.on (07) 3377 22 M. Juq.cdu.au QUEER SEXUALITY yuuj by your UQ Union. SEMPER FLOREAT QUEER EDITION 2003
THE Ul\iIVERSITY OF QUI:ElIJi3LAND LIBRARY
Contents: Indigenolls people have been, often violently, dispossessed of their land ______2 and culture. They remain some of EDITORIALS the most marginalised in our society. QUEER SPECIAL There can be no social progress Design a Logo for QC 2004 4 without recognition of the injustices Queer Role Models 5 suffered by Indigenous Australians. Centrelink Successfully Processes Claim 6 Queers and the Common Youth Allowance 6 Princess Queer and the Not So Magical Centrelink Application 7 SEMPER FLOREAT Sodomy 8 ~~~ THE UQ UNION NEWSPAPER 10 Coloured Fantasy: Racial Fetishisation and the Queer Community 11 Why the Gay Marriage Debate Sux, & Questions for the Radical Queer Left 12 Editors: David Lavercombe Fitting In 13 Shona Nystrom Schools Outreach Campaign 14 Jim Wilson Arts Editor: Sofia Ham UNION STUFF President's Report 15 Greetings All 15 Telephone: 3377 2237 Facsimile: 3377 2220 OTHER STUFF [email protected] Amnesty Creative Writing Competition Winners 16 Speaking Out 18 Semper Floreat Offices Are Blokes OK? 19 Union Complex Howard Now Making Parliamenta~ Decisions Using Paper Toy 20 The University of Queensland Illuminate Your University 21 St Lucia, 4067 Touring Throughout Europe 22 How to evict your Housemate; a step by step guide 23 Unleash the Gimp 24 The views expressed in Semper Non Sequitur: Sequential Horror 25 Floreat do not necessarily reflect Aunty Jan: Modern Manners 26 those of the editors, the UQ Union, or First the Beanbags, Now the Photocopiers 28 The University of Queensland. I Enjoy Blowing Smoke At People 29 Drinking Games 30 The editors encourage you to submit Keeping Us Down 31 your own views for publication (see Hipster Freedom 32 page 2). Will DVD Kill the Writer Star? 33 10 Things I Hate About Teens 34 I Have A Complete and Total Lack of Interest In You 35 SweAM~e ~ Pet Shop Boys: Some Heartaches You Just Can't Dance Away 36 Ode to a Grecian Urn 38
FATS: FILM ART THEATRE SOUND Film 39 Sound --- 42 ~gan 46 Night Monkeys 47 Feather & Leather 48 P~~ ~ Whatcha Gonna Do 50 Schonell Timetable 52
.UQ union 1 Shona David Jim I think everything has pretty much been All I will say is that I was able to get much It is sometimes difficult to understand wliy more sleep this month compared to last people hale and fear others because they said. month. Less headaches too. Queers are are different. People seem to discriminate on great. So that's three things. (ittle things that don't matter and that an Peace, out. individual can't change - skin colour, gender, Khrys Robb (Male Queer Sexuality Office) ethnicity or sexual preference, etc - whi'e usually ignoring the big things - is the person (To be read with visualisation of author in robe, slippers, glass of goon and smoking a pipe) honest, reliable, competent etc. Some Hello and Greetings dear reader, people talk of Ihe structural oppression and patriarchal nature of society, but the editors I trust this editorial will find you all well, In the past the Queer edition of Semper has really would like to believe that our generation and just been a little 'hooray for gay' affair, Nice, pretty but not really addressing issues that the ones that follow will be more tolerant and Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Tranz and intersex people face both in our own community and in understanding of groups outside the 'norm'; wider society. An analysis of the homophobic creation of identity and the struggle of our not merely offering a grudging acceptance "community" against heterosexism is important but an understanding of 'us' is also important. (which some groups have fought long and hard to achieve) but an embracing of the At this stage I cannot believe that we do have a community. Rather, when I go out shopping differences and a realisation that these or clubbing or to the health sen/ices I see a rough coalition of people who have been groups have so much to offer and contribute shunned by the general populous, the only thing that we have in common is difference. Yet to 'the mainstream.' How/ever saying this, within our difference we are different, we are people of myriad racial and cultural there are still (and probably always will be) backgrounds, of a spectrum of genders and many social economic classes. We are people, narrow-minded, hateful people. Education and understanding are the key. we love and sometimes hate, we need to acknowledge that yes, we do replicate the behaviours taught to us by those who relegated us to ghettos of 'gay districts' by segregating what could be a community into tribes which battle for the handouts that are given to pacify This year we have produced an Indigenous, us. Through out all this what is important to acknowledge is that we remain people regardless Women's and Queer edition of Semper. These are three broad groupings that the UQ of race, gender or culture we fight the same battle that for liberation. Union believes require significant support I would also like to acknowledge those people who are by choice, no longer part of the and representation due to the historical marginalisation, victimisation and 'norm,' those who have embraced queer people not regardless of our differences but discrimination of these groups in the wider because of it. It is to these allies who have seen the oppression of others and attempted to community. One challenge confronting lay aside the privileges that sheltered them from hate to take up and support the struggle that minority or victimised groups is the feeling of I say thank you. being oppressed and silenced by 'the mainstream". The Editors wanted to have In closing the purpose of this edition is to create a space in which to engage with these special editions of Semper this year to issues, to discuss that which is generally not spoken about in wider circles but above all to discuss and examine some of the issue promote a discourse. It is through challenging each other that we learn more and will confronting Indigenous, Queer and female eventually come to understanding. members of our society, and to provide Queerly Yours in Solidarity, space and a voice for these groups. Khrys Robb SEMPER FLOREAT IS YOUR UNION NEWSPAPER The editors of Semper in 2003 believe WHATYOU NEEDTO KNOW in an objective press. We are not dictated to by any particular political party or faction. Writing articles We attempt to make our reports on Union If you have an idea for an article, it is a good idea to first check it with the editors to see activities as objective as possible. This relies if they are interested and how much space could be dedicated to it.. on information received as well as activities observed by the editors. We are open to hear The editors are interested in your views, but not mere assertions. Essays and articles ail perspectives on any situation. filled with good argument and supported by facts will be preferred when choosing from We attempt to produce a balanced amongst the submissions. publication taking in as many different ideas and ideologies as possible. This relies on Word length submissions. The editors normally choose articles of 500-1000 words in length. If you have some The editors cannot guarantee every article graphics, include these as well, but please don't paste them into Word, send them as will be well balanced within itself although a separate files. well formulated argument is encouraged.
Submitting Articles We encourage counter arguments to any article published. However for constructive Submitted documents should include the author's name (so we don't have to go fishing dialogue, criticism should be directed through the e-mails to figure out who sent what). towards the content of the article, and not the author. Please do not name your file Semper, Semper Article, Article for Semper, Semperl, or The editors reserve the right to a personal Semper Edx. We end up with a heap of files that we cannot tell apart. opinion, but this does not restnct our acceptance of the opinion of others. If you have an opinion, we invite you to submit it to Semper Floreat. -UQ T union n 9 % 0 H !a Letters to the Editors
Ed/tors,
Thank you for presenting me with Dear Semper editor. the opportunity to cut my own As you may have known, many [We apologise if any article baby In half (in what must be a Chinese of UQ find the article causes offense to our readers, tragic, arthouse rehashing of the titled "Taiwan: the Struggle for this is certainly not our intention. King Solomon legend). I do the statehood" (published on the The article In question was written appreciate the retention of August issue of the Semper) In response to another article on creative control, even If my offending. Representing the Taiwan in the May edition: medium has now become 'total opinion of hundreds of Chinese of 'Shoulder to Shoulder, Australia butchery'! UQ, wc believe It is not wise to and the Taiwanese Question'. (Your bonsai allusion, mcidcntally, publish such an article. It is the We encourage students with a may be a bit off. Bonsai trees are editors' responsibility to make contrary view (or any viewpoint) to pruned lovingly - and not all that sure Its publication will not Insult write an article expressing their much! - over many years. What Its readers. We believe that opinion. We will publish all views you're suggesting Is more like Taiwan is part of China, but on this issue and do not believe it Christmas tree euthanasia, which, someone may not. We are not appropriate for some to expect granted, has a certain amount of forcing everyone to have the same censorship of public debate. merit.) belief as we have, but we require that Semper, as a publication of The Editors] I've spent the last couple of student union, should not be used hours hacking away with a pair of as a political forum to discuss secateurs, and have miraculously Issues that will offend Its brought the piece under 1,200 readers. words (much to Its detriment obviously). Proof-reading has been In the name of the Chinese sparse, but please assume all Students and Scholars Association spelling, grammar, et cetera to be of UQ, we ask Semper to: HI Semper, correct. 1. make an apology to all the I'm really Impressed by the (Certainly, I'll take the rap for readers offended by the article diversity and high quality of any errors. In preference to 2. promise there will be no more articles in the women's edition someone else creating them on my similar articles published and loved the privileging of pink on behalf I) Fonts used are Times New the cover. Roman, Jester, and Teletype We will keep pursuing this issue (latter two enclosed). I've also until we have a satisfying Ev Included a watermark that I feel response. would be appropriate (big A centered or small A tiled). Sincerely,
If you have any last-mlnutc Kal Xu problems / concerns /what-have- President yous with the piece, please feel free to give me a call I love a UQ Chinese Students and good scramble to the deadline! Scholars Association
Cheers,
Jacob
[See page 28 -Ed]
-UQ II 'R T) 'f 1 0 T^f union Desiift) s loio hf QC ^OO^tl
What is QC? •'v^TH QC is short for Queer Collaborations.
QC is a national queer conference, with the majority of attendees being students. It was first held in 1991 at the University of Technology in Sydney. Since then the conference convened annually at various Australian universities. In 2004, it will be held in Brisbane.
Aims of QC • To collect, disseminate and exchange information relevant to students and the community who identify as Lesbian, Gay, Transgender, inter-sex. Bisexual and Queer.
• To educate and raise awareness of issues for those who identify as Queer.
• To make educational institutions aware of the existence and needs of Queer students.
• To provide a means of communication which will facilitate the organisation of political activity for queer networks and communities.
Competition Guidelines: 1. Open to anyone who reads the competition details.
2. Due date is the 17th October 2003.
3.Contact details are [email protected] for inquiries (or for electronic submissions).
4. Mailing address is PO Box 531, Albert Street, Brisbane, QLD, 4000.
5. Logo must be related to QC's and must incorporate the letters "QC" in that order, and can include the words "Brisbane", "Brisvegas", "2004, and/or "04".
6. Logo must not be racist, sexist, homophobic or otherwise offensive to our community.
7. Logo is subject to editorial discretion.
FOR THE LAST TIME, THE 2003 EDITORS OF SEMPER FLOREAT ARE CALLING FOR SUBMISSIONS.
ENDGAME EDITION: SUBMISSIONS DUE AROUND
THE 3RD OF OCTOBER 2003.
HOWEVER, IF YOU HAVE A BRAIN WAVE A FEW DAYS AFTER, PLEASE
CONTACT us. WE WOULD RATHER A LITTLE LATE THAN NOT AT ALL.
07 3377 2237 IgMilfflMagiaHllstoVMItelliai
-UQ n umon T 'K o n •r QUEER ROLE
When I look to myself I see a multitude of MODELS things. I love my job and find it immensely rewa'ding but 1 suffer burnout and stress. My long term goal is to find somewhere in life where I can focus on helping others AARON MARSHAM (corny sounding I know) so my short term goal is to graduate and end up teaching. Lonliness... well like so many others I feel As we all grow up we look around to trapped in a world where I am al alone. different people to gauge how we will be This is largely due to the fact that I have when we're older. You look to your parents mega issues with sharing and opening up, to see how they cope with working full partly due to the fact that I find some time, raising children, and having a full people in my life self absorbed and self time relationship (or not as the case may obsessed who only help to reinforce these be). You look to your friends to see the walls and don't help bring them down. As mistakes they make in love and life and a result of this 1 become depressed and vow to learn from them, and you look to feel I need to plug this "hole"' in my life with yourself to find out the person you want to someone else. Not necessarily the cure of be and where you're going to go with life. my ills. As a gay person trapped in a straight So when it comes to using friends and JLsrici-: MicHAiit. KiRiw world how do we queers cope? 1 look to family as role models In life it will only take my parents to see a couple almost near Lately I've come to realise that there are you so far. My parents have been a great retirement, my dad works on a farm, my queer role models everywhere, many of source of inspiration for my work ethic and these people are breaking into mother gave up work to raise six children. my drive to get an education and better Their relationship I think suffered professions such as mining, engineering myself. My friends have influenced actions and law while being completely out and somewhat because of us, both of them put and risks I have taken in my life and how I us first and themselves second. Now that honest about it. We have many queer conduct myself in friendships. Neither teachers challenging our children's beliefs we have all grown up and left the nest group you will notice has shown me how I (well except for my younger sister) only and opening up their minds, we have even am supposed to proceed on the path of finally broken onto mainstream television now can they start to put back the p'eces love. of what 1 hope were a very loving with somewhat cheesy and corny shows that portray some of the difficulties we relationship. The lesson I learn from them Stereotypes paint gay men as purely sex face. is one of hardship and endurance, a driven with no ability to form loving caring worthy lesson to have. relationships, with all older gay men single In response to my comments above about and depressed or in open relationships love and lack of queer role models, well I look to my friends (an even proportion of where they sleep around but still have that both straight and gay people) and I see recently I've come to a revelation. 1 don't "one" they are in love with (yeah right!). think that they exist. Now I'm not saying confusion, lack of focus and lonliness. Supposedly lesbians are always throwing Many of my friends have now graduated that people who are happily in love, in a themselves headfirst into relationships long term reialionship and are queer don't University, few are working in the fields and shacking up within a week of getting they chose to study and many are not exist, I'm just saying that I don't think of together, nesting syndrome 1 think some of them as role models. Everyone (both 100% satisfied with where they ended up. my friends have called it. The world thinks All of them however are working towards a queer and straight) deals with love in we are a bunch of sexually driven freaks different ways. We each have our own goal in that aspect, their current work is and weirdo's. just a stepping stone to where they want meanings, and determinations of when we are actually experiencing it. Love for each to be. Most are alone or in unfuifilling So what's a queer to do? Well that's a of us is unique and is coloured by relationships, they good question. Queer role models exist experiences and perceptions, As such 1 date drop kicks or and surround us everywhere in life; the don't think we will ever find role models to people who are a problem is that we (well at least I) don't match our perceptions and ideas about destructive recognise them for who and what they are. love. influence in their When I look for a queer role model I look life. Very few are in solely for queers who are happy in a long My argument condensed is this; no one in stable, loving term and stable relationship and nothing life has all the answers. There are some relationships, of all else. Since I only know of a few lesbian times in life where we are not meant to, my queer friends 1 couples in this situation then 1 turn around times where we are supposed to live and can think only of and say that 1 don't know any. How wrong learn. Love is one such time in life where 1 one such couote. am I? think this is true. juini MCCKOSSI.N'
-UQ CL, '^' D T' 1 0 0^ union Centrelink Successfully
Processes Claim Karene Arundell
BRISBANE: In a startling display of promptness and competency, Centrelink processed and activated a claim within a week of the initial request, it has been reported.
"I am... shocked," reported University of Queensland student Jason Berstow, 23, at a press conference held yesterday by his letterbox. "I put this claim in on Tuesday, and they said it would take a week... it's been four days."
Berstow, clearly struggling to remain calm, recounted the dumbfounding story before a hushed audience of reporters.
Recently I realized 1 had to change my Centrelink status over from Newstart to Austudy because I've just become a student," recalled Berstow. "I told the lady at the call centre Wtfjj and she said I'd be getting the new payment within the week. I laughed, but when 1 checked my bank account details this morning I discovered a mysterious chunk of money there. 1 went to the mailbox and... here it is. Notification. The correct details. The correct amount. In only four days." Berstow then bowed his humbled head and thrust h's "(top) Berstow re-enacts the retrieval of notification letter aloft to the sound of stunned chatter, clapping and cheering. the letter; and the infamous form The incident has caused much shock and confusion amongst the student community, none of whom can vouch for a similar story of Centrelink competency. In fact, it seems so unfeasible that suspicions have arisen of a hoax constructed by the government Quims aiming to trounce Centrelink's long-standing image of blistering inefficiency. At the time of press, sources at Centrelink were also unable to explain the deftness and accuracy with which the claim was processed. "We're not sure how this happened, AhJVTHE though we have put on a lot of new staff lately," Centrelink public relations official Gina Garner reported. "Keep assured we'll get to the bottom of this and everything will soon go back to normal - rent assistance requests will be ignored, payments will be suspended for failure to attend imaginary appointments, and after three change of COMMON address reminders we'll still be sending fortnightly forms to your old house."
relationships, nor does it acknowledge the The system also fails to recognize the YOUTH added disadvantage that queers face in difficulty faced by Queer students in the the family home. parental home. Students in many cases are forced to hide their sexuality from ALLO\[)ANCE One of the main underlying features of parents in the fear that they will be thrown income support, Youth Allowance and the out of the family home, and consequently, "age of Independence" is the discrimination will not be able to receive assistance placed against Queer without their parents co-operation. The criteria for "unreasonable to live at home' As study usually involves a full-time students, The most obvious example of does not make specific reference to commitment, a lot of students rely on the how the system disregards non- coming out or issues relating to welfare system in order to receive income. heterosexuals is in the criteria for Homophobia in the family household Without assistance, many students would Independence. According to Centrelink a therefore making their inclusions as be forced to work rather than study. person is considered Independent if they: Students are able to gain assistance reasons for not being able to live at home through Youth Allowance, Austudy, • have been, married , including living in a dependant upon the individual centrelink Abstudy, Disability Support Pension, Rent marriage-like relationship for 12 months or social case worker. Assistance, Student Financial Supplement more, or six months (in special The current system is discriminatory and Scheme, and Health Care Cards as well as circumstances); not acceptable. It Is time that students other schemes. As of June 1999, over 400, become aware of the fact that the 000 students were receiving some from of The term marriage-like applies to government and the welfare state Income assistance from the Government. heterosexual de facto relationships, therefore, excluding Homosexual systematically excludes queers from The welfare system in Australia is relationships, from recognition as an welfare benefits. 2004, being an election homophobic, actively discriminating Independent relationship. The underlying year, presents the perfect opportunity for against queer students in offering income implication of this Howard Government queer students throughout the nation to assistance. The welfare system, as it regulation is the belief that people under override the current oppressive state, to currently operates, fails to recognise that the age of 25 do not enter into non- ensure that the welfare of queer students, young people can have non-heterosexual heterosexual relationships. through the provision of income support, is met.
-UQ union (M T •R 0 'K 'A 'T This is just great thought Princess, but where will I sleep tonight? IDCSSS After a not so happily ever after evening in the Engineering labs Princess returned the next day to the not so magical city and was ushered into the tiny, musky lair of an odd creature, with hideously large eyes and md the Dot so w^f).a. two heads (well not really but still...) The creature beckoned to princess and told her that her parents would let her stay at home if she would stop being queer, so the Great and Powerful Minister for Welfare would not give her anything unless she toiled for eighteen months and made $15 000 or married her handsome prince. Princess Khryt llcofefei cried that she loved Darcy and would never marry some awful prince so she started Once upon a fairly recent time, in fact on'y playmate Darcy. Princess smiled waived away from the not so magical kingdom a few months ago, their was a beautiful and pashed Darcy, the room watched on pondering, where will I sleep? how can I princess who lived in a very Bouegy house as Princess placed her tender hands on eat? In desperation Princess wandered in in Yeronga with her parents The King the Darcy's Bond's clad breasts and search of her love. (T.K.)and Queen (Queenie). The Princess announced she had found her Princess was very happy and loved her parents very Charming. And they all lived happily ever On her way to find her beloved she much; her parents were very proud of the after... discovered a handsome but very Princess who had graduated from her all effeminate young prince sobbing in the girls school with very good grades and now Well not quite, the party ended abruptly gutter the Prince had found his Prince went to University in a castle. The Princess with sniggers and lesbian jokes. Darcy was Charming and had been kicked out by his was very good at making things and was evicted from the premises and Princess father the King, his mother gave him and doing an engineering degree at the was locked in a tower of verbal and apartment and a bag of s'lver so university. Her parents T.K and Queenie homophobic abuse. Now Princess had a Centeriink rejected him also. Princess and were very prcud of her although they would lot of friends and most of them lived away the Prince went back to his apartment to prefer that she did a more seemly degree from home, they made a living by working decide what to do. The spent many days and wished she wore her pretty gowns in part time as they studied and had the studying the archaic rules of Centrelink. stead of jeans, but apart from that life was financial gap filled by delivering a magical Then armed with new knowledge they very good. The time arose when the parchment called a Youth Allowance embarked on a perilous mission. The princess was to turn eighteen and the time Lodgement form every fortnight to the Princess and Prince marched down to to choose a husband was drawing nearer. benevolent ruler of a Kingdom called office of Births, Deaths and Marriages to The princess was very beautiful, long Centrelink. So princess cut off her sunsilk sign a piece of paper and marched back to blonde hair which shone with the full extent locks and created a Sturdily anchored centrelink. Once inside the grimy dungeon of the complete sunsilk maximum shine suspension bridge, put on her doc's and of despair Princess and her queer range; teeth as white and straight as fled from her tower and started down the identifying prince marched up to the columns of roman marble without rocky yellow brick road to the magical city counter and were granted their parchments orthodontics (this is a fairy tale after all...) of Centrelink in Toowong. and Youth Allowance. The Princess locked and strong, slight body from years of all eyes with another young woman and the girls basketball and hockey camps. The When P'incess arrived at the slightly feel instantly in lust and they all went home only problem was that no man had asked begrimed glass gates of Centrelink together. to marry her, her mother felt this was Princess become shocked by the utter strange as most of the princess' time was poverty of the people living outside this The Moral to this story Centrelink's spent with the princes from her degree in magical city. Taking a moment to compose policies refuse to acknowledge the the pub playing pool. The day of the herself she entered the city to find the diversity of issues experienced by people Princess' eighteenth birthday arrived and same poverty inside, then joining the under the age of 25. Centrelink also the party was enormous with all of the queue princess waited and waited and refuses to acknowledge the severity of beautiful princess and handsome princes waited for her audience with the ruler of the homophobia in our community and how dancing and sipping Funki Dori's, city Finally princess arrived at the city homophobia is an intolerable environment cosmopolitans and Chardonnay, the square where she was forced to relive all of to live in. The Heterosexist definition of expensive stuff not Coolibah goon. But the horrors that had befallen her, verbal spousal relationships also means that Princess was nowhere to be seen as the abuse, financial depravation and after Queer students are forced to live a lie in time approached for the cutting of the reliving her tials she was handed her false marriages in order to financially eighteen tiered Gucci designed birthday trophy, that magical piece of paper that survive. cake when in front of all of the Kingdom, would ensure that... she could come back tomorrow to see the social worker well in front of all of the C.E.O's of her Our Lives father's company, the Princess appeared, providing that she could prove what she her sunsilk shine glowing her teeth shining had been through and her sexuality and Our struggle and her hockoy trained hand firmly gripped that she was studying full time and that that around the hand of her childhood she had no contact with her parents and Our right to Welfare. that... etc etc.
-UQ a. ^' '^ 'R 'D 1 'f 1 0 1^ union Maybe we'll see a new twist to the "tough Email interview with Greg Milne, on behalf on crime" election slogan: "Peter Beattie: of the Attorney-General of Queensland. Hard on Sodomy!" RP: Would the Attorney-General support Sodomy laws are silly Given that the enforcement of sections 208 (Unlawful Queensland's are not enforced, and never sodomy) and 209 (Attempted sodomy) of will be, what's the urgency to repeal them? the Criminal Code Act 1899 if he became aware of a specific breach of them? Few who remember being a gay teenager would wish the experience on others. The GM: enforcement is a matter for police sodomy laws deny queer kids the civil rights they need to stand up for RP: Does the Attorney-General support the themselves. They threaten exposure and sodomy laws in principle, or does he jail at the whim of the government or believe they should be repealed, just not headmaster. The victims are too young to yet? vote or stand for office themselves, and GM: the government has no plans to alter queer members of the Queensland Justin was 18 when he met Dian at a fair, the existing law at this time parliament still aren't willing to speak up for and wanted to see more of her. He worked them. Injustice is alive and biting in the at McDonalds, she was in the second year RP: If he believes the laws should be moonlight state. of a science degree at UQ. One night after repealed later, what circumstances prevent them from being repealed now, and does coffee, and a drive in search of condoms, There are other reasons for urgency HIV he expect these to change in the next term they ended up in her bedroom. This time, infection rates appear to be rising again. they tried something different: anal sex. of pariiament? The government worred that the original sodomy laws put safe sex trainers in an So what, you wonder? In Queensland, GM: See above awkward position. They responded by Justin could spend 14 years in jail for reforming them to single out gay school sodomy Maybe you could too. RP: Otherwise, how does he reconcile his children. support for these laws with the findings of Sodomy laws were a product of medieval the UN Human Rights Commission and the europe. Some countries got rid of them The other concern is suicide. 1 believe it US Supreme Court that forbidding centuries ago, but Australia and its allies kills similar numbers of gay men as does behaviour natural to a particular sexuality enforced them until very recently in ways AIDS; the data are in the library for you to but not that natural to others, subjects that we are now embarrased to admit. make your own guess if you want. The persons of that sexuality to arbitrary After the second world war, gay men who discussion on AIDS in 1990 shows more punishment, in violation of their right to due had survived the holocaust were concern for potential straight victims than process? imprisoned by our occupying forces. actual gay ones, and queer kids tend to kill Queenslanders were routinely jailed for more of themselves than their straight GM: See above being gay until 1990. oppressors. RP: Does he believe the sodomy laws are The tide started to turn in 1948, when But if AIDS forced reform of the sodomy supported by young adults, the only people Kinsey reported that there were about as laws, youth suicide should force their they directly affect? many queer Americans as left handed repeal. The link between sodomy lawsand ones. A decade later in England, the HIV infection is indirect. It doesn't take GM: These laws cover any person of any Wolfenden report concluded that much imagination to see how a state law age having anal intercourse with a person regardless of anyone's personal morals, against being gay and a national under the age of 18. the law had no legitimate concern with propensity to send illegal kids to RP: Does he fear that support for the One consensual sex. Hardly anyone disputes concentration camps could contribute to Nation Party might increase if the this now. Don Dunstan brought gay law suicide. government discussed repealing the reform to Australia in 1972. Only Tasmania sodomy laws? was left when Queensland caught up in Lobbying to repeal the Queensland 1990, and they held out until 1997. sodomy laws has been fairly low key so far. Gay kids have enough problems when the GM: See above Unlike all other states, where sodomy laws government ignores them. Older men have been repealed entirely, the have other priorities, and might fear that Queensland laws have been reformed only speaking out on this issue will stir up Email interview with John Frame, presenter partly Anal sex is still banned for people prejudices linking them to paedophilia. of Queer Radio on ZZZ and queer rights under 18; other sexual activity is legal from activist. You might think that the laws will be 16. repealed as a matter of course, but the RP: How long have you been lobbying the The Northern Territory has a law against government has proven reluctant to even government to repeal the under-age sex between men under 18, but the disucss them, much less commit to action. sodomy laws, and why did you start? government is keen to repeal it. Ours A louder campaign is needed. refuses to discuss it. JF: I felt forced to act in early 2000 when, That's up to us. The government will on the 19th of February, the Courier Mail You might find it strange to read about repeal these laws only if they are forced to, printed a big feature article titled other people's sexual activity I certainly and the only people with enough interest "Reasonable Age". find it strange to write about it. It's none of and organisation to force them are the our business, however the government students of this university There will be a Above a large image of ancient Greek art thinks it's theirs. Not just Semper, but the meeting during queerfest to decide how. depicting several naked men about to get it police and judges are watching you. on (inferring an orgy), there was the immediately inflammatory statement: "An
-UQ 6' 'T union I expected that in order to achieve a resolution it would just be a matter of writing to the Attorney General and Premier pointing out that this was a real and identifiable problem, one with serious consequences - especially for youth, and of asking for either an effective information campaign or the simple solution of removal of the Sodomy Law. Again I was wrong. I believe that they have known full well since 1990 that the Sodomy Law is a problem, but they just refuse to do anything about it. RP: Can you speculate why the state's leaders refuse to discuss these laws? Do they believe the effects aren't important, are they afraid of controversy, or does talk of gay teenagers make them genuinely uncomfortable? JF: I'm sure that the reason the Beattie Government is totally silent on this issue is -UQ CL 11 (R V •f a 0 7^ union r:'~*.'"7fCr"?''--'r>.*,'*'•>';••': "T'":^"^''T'%'."''^'^''".",'''. "'• ••"•. •, ' "Be" The beings parted My eyes awake : •^'tl'^ir.?;.:?., TKH 2003 Pierced by vivid blue The world undulates around me My brow furrows My world absorbs into reality A question sent from mine TKH,2002 Fantasy fades as a hand reaches for me Step back 'Gazihg into his eyes of chocolate... I melt. What is this? A smile replies To touch... sensual, My mind reels as the haze is lifted "Be" To taste.... 1 see before me what once was but now is The timbre low and comforting Hand extended the figure smiles Holding him in my arms, As warmth in the snow The atmosphere Unv\/illing to break, I slip soft as velvet Unwilling to leave, Caught by the moment warm and tender drawn away My heart is torn. My eyes close Snap back No comfort comes in his absence, The intensity increases My hand reaches Warm becomes a bearable heat Yet jubilation exalted at his return. Smooth yet rough My arm flinches at the touch is there ho other place in this world. as it runs along the line such as hot water on supple skin Where I can stay in such bliss? My hand falters My heart begins to burn as the heat shifts Caught by a vice Asmile,aglimpse, a look, A sudden soothing cools me Relaxed and guided Sends my body into a euphoric dream, Emanating from my lips it floods Roughness subsides Passing between us Only to pull back by the touch of his lips. Tenderness replaces from soul to mortal My fingers tt'acethe lines of his face, The warmth returns a refreshing presence his brow, his cheek, Diminished in Intensity Devoid of all ill "Be" ;all to perfection. Not of a world of pain doth it come Heard through fingers and eyes They glide through the silk of his hair, The buoyancy of the moment carries me back The whisper lingers The world steadies a soft Wave from his roots, and fades. My bearings fixed gently caressing as they go. The lips withdrawn This is he.- ; . ^^^n Byron Bay Summer /\\\'m dreams focussed in one. Law School 2003 Southern Cros.s ^Stie earth lori^s:fd^ 6th - 19th December Inclusive "=^'^^ isb^-l0ii^5^orhis;7^^^^^ Southern Cross University's School of Law & Justice will be hosting the Byron Bay ^StanJeci/I'Wakeifrom a^dream to reality, Summer Law School between November 2003 and February 2004. The summer program is interesting, flexible, economical and academically rigorous. One week intensive units (undergraduate) on offer are: |to^fln(j;^Him Contact: • Advanced Advocacy (6 -12 December) ^11 thought is lost In him. School of l.aw and Justice • Entertainment Law (6 -12 December) Southern Cross University • Public Interest Advocacy (6-12 December) iReMriirtg to sluhlbier, • phone: +61 02 66 203 104 • Race and the Law (13 -19 December) fax; +61 02 66 224 167 • Holocaust and the Law (13-19 December) [IfeeNo else.; :-•/-: email: [email protected],au • Psychiatry, Psychology and the Law (13-19 December) V^<^§%$^^4^':- ^:M'\'':¥'' ••••.'•• •:'•' • Students, Practitioners, Industry Professionals and people requiring knowledge and understanding of these units are encouraged to attend, however placed are limited. http://www.scu.edu.au/schools/iawj/ \:-^;'^>r^^?^^'';'f\'' t.:/.. •.:,./.... -UQ 'T \0 union Vi T 9. 0 •K The racial fetishisation manifests itself vividly in pornography Much of the inter-racially themed titles revolve around power Coloured relations and racist domination role play. Pornography attempts to make racism sexy Asian men [feminised to be like their female counterparts] - because of the Western fantasy of their supposed "docility" and "submissiveness" - will be generally depicted as Fantasy: Racial bottoms, the second class citizens of the gay community. The conceptualisation of black men is hung, top yet animalistic commonly referred to as Black Stallions. The ethnic is exotic - Fetishisation we're the token sexual fantasies of the white ruling class. Being a GAM (I hate the term so much!), stepping into the scene, mature aged white men consistently vie for my attention. They and the Queer shower me with promises of financial security in return for being their play thing. In the strip and on the net, it's sickening and seedy I'm not some gold-digging Geisha. And no, being Filipino does not mean I'll jump onto any American soldier boy or business man. Community Rose Hancock is not my sister. Cleariy the roots of racism and heterosexism are not independent, iguel but rather intimately connected. Any recognition of racism must necessarily recognize sexism and homophobia at the same time. Any liberation movement that does not do so denies the Black tops, Asian bottoms, versatile Whites. We've heard it all complexity of its oppression, and is doomed to failure in its before. The sexual hierarchy is the unspoken, unwritten law struggle against the oppression as a result. consistent with all sexualities. Because of our community's preoccupation with sex, the fetishisation of race becomes all the The queer community needs to take a deep look at itself. We need more apparent. Being the object of one's desire, who would to stop recreating the racism of our heterosexual counterparts. We complain? If it's a mutual desire, a fair enough exchange, what's need to stop recreating heterosexual structures period. Queer the problem? Won't racial fetishisation pave the way for tolerance, meant to deviate from the 'norm', not to integrate. There is acceptance and racial equality in our community and the greater unimaginable potential for the queer community to be a shining society? Aren't we all striving for an interracial society? example of equality Here we have broken the gender power structures, now we need to etch away the racial roles of the Outrageous, but I hear it all the time. Many NESBs are too heterosexist society we are trying to smash. preoccupied with racist attacks and racism in general that we forget the sexual categorisation we fall in Western society is a form Love me for who I am, not what I am. Love me for what I have to of oppression against us. The sexual hierarchy is not a social say, and not my accent. Love me for the colour of my personality ladder that we can freely move up in, like many of the social and not the colour of my skin. Recognise that I am different, but I structures in our advanced capitalist world. am also your equal. .UQ 0, 11 £ H 1) T' 1 0 1/ union 11 mma^m^^^^^^K.-fSJ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^mm •^ BP^^I Ulhy the gay ;•' •^'''-. . •5^111 • ^^^ -^ marriage debate sux, ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^k. and questions for tlie Pi radical queer left v.' ,p Liz Stokes [nus nsui women's ofTicer] -: . . I've been thinking about the recent media 4. The Pope/Church has reiterated his religious minority view that sexuality is storm over the same sex marriage debate stance against marriage because he is morality so powerfully the voice of the and have written some "notes". I'm not reiterating his ownership of it. It's fairly state?" Carmen answers: "Because the interested in chastising anyone for their laughable that the Church finds Same Sex answer is not moral: It is political and opinions, I contribute this in the interest of Marriage (SSM) to be such a threat to the economic". "Sexuality is a tool for respectful political debate. When I talk stability of the Church. And it's a debate, controlling society". (Vasquez). It's older about State, it's not the State government, that radical left queers need to go over, than the homo/hetero divide, more so or solely the federal government. It's the every now and again, about strategy and because it doesn't seem that the system that "we" "together" (supposedly) opportunity Just because this is a weak hetero/homo debate has been public for "elected" (whatever good ever does, point of the conservative Right, as long as that long, However, thanks to conservative however long ago,) as "legitimate" (a capitalism is held sovereign (as long as the history trends, a lot of 'current surprisingly fickle concept) "authority" to church continues to profit from large tracts contemporary theory' often seems to be "govern" "Australia" (a land of many of land) in our secular law, then the 'really new'. See exhibit A: the control of borders; contested.) 1. It's not just about capitalist church will find a way around women's sexuality as it has contributed to growing up and "tolerating" everyone's such prickly issues. Because who is women's oppression, being tied to desire to show/ demonstrate to the interested in engaging in a debate that compulsory (heterosexual) marriage, community/ worid that one really prioritised allow no space for new imaginings of a connection/ relationship with one other sexuality queer kinship, queer 6. Marriage has its roots in organised person. It's not a "simple" argument about communities, kweer lives? Jeanette religion. It is championed by those as an whether people can publicly show their Winterson said once "Imagination should expression relating to spirituality "love" lor each other. first and foremost be used for the Nonetheless, marriage appeared at a time revolution of everyday life, not symbolic when organised religion was the State, or 2. The issue of gay marriage is always representations of the status quo"... or at least was given [allowed] powers that ignited to distract queer activist and others something to that effect. are now defended (in western liberal challenging the state from other matters at democracies) as necessary (secular) and hand. There are other facets to this 5. 1 was reading "To Destroy Sexuality" regular (ie normal) government argument that is always, in the mainstream (Guy Hockenhem, in Polysexuality, responsibilities. Eg: legislation on partner media, portrayed as a "personal" issue. I.e. Semiotext(e):1983). Guy says that by superannuation, family custody visiting something to be argued person to person. acknowledging that the capitalist order loved ones in hospital. Carmen Vasquez The "gay" and "lesbian" community media, "controls life through its expressive sexual, also comments: 1. there are rights and lapdogs of the mainstream media differ emotional and affective aspects, protections to (married) heteronuclear neither Indeed, some of them even call constraining it to the dictates of [the families. 2. counters that everyone this the Big Issue of the gay and lesbian capitalist order's] totalitarian organisation deserves these 'rights' because they community. (It's as though they're based on exploitation, [colonialism, breathe, not cos they have a certain colour/ consistently stuck for a story!) imperialism] private property, male sexuality/ class. 3. the concept of hetero to dominance, profit, and profitability!.]", and sexuality is what the concept of being white 3. I'll repeat that: The issue of gay marriage noting that one of these is marriage and is to race: the normative standard which is always ignited to distract queer activists the nuclear family and given also that the needs no definition of it's own, because and others challenging the state from other capitalist state permeates our bodies to everything else is defined in relation to it. matters at hand. Oppressed people, it achieve this, Guy suggests that we "direct As well, this normative standard which seems, are often given opportunities to the revolutionary struggle against capitalist needs no definition of it's own bestows engage with the State: but this is only on oppression there where it is most deeply legal protections and social privileges to the State's terms and conditions, and rooted -in the living flesh of our own body". those who adhere to it. rarely are they ever real opportunities. For In Queerly Classed, an anthology of example: work harder and you'll escape lesbians and gay men writing about class, 7. it is a damning indictment of the "same your crummy situation in life, concern Carmen Vasquez asks "[w]hy does the sex marriage movement" (SSMM) that they yourself with the intimate details of the rich religious right hold such sway on public have failed to achieve 'universal gay and famous, as described by the tabloid policy on state laws? Why is it that the marriage rights" in all the countries where press and 'lifestyle' magazines. this campaign was undertaken. Damning -UQ union n T •R 0 01 A 'I because the SSMM has not put fonvard a considered analysis of the use of "(human) rights discourse" in their campaign. See the next point for clarification. Meanwhile, for more academicky and a deeper analysis of human rights discourse, look up Do I have trouble fitting in? Am I feeling fine doing what I am doing? Uni of Wendy Brown, Michael Warner and Judith course; the ultimate; The world is mine. Yiiars go. by and what Is it that Butler (although Judith does have a motivates me? Of course T competition. Having the guts to say; I want to do propensity to break one's brain). well. • ' •.•;,•" '-• .'-'. ,. ^/- • •:•"••: The truth: - Can I really relax if I have not tried hard? Am I a walking person 8. Michael Warner, in his essay Beyond of knowledge? What do I aspire to? - Experiences: No matter how old you Gay Marriage, argues that this failure is are we all have experiences. So I am at Uni - Oh yes of course - there is a also due to the fact that the same-sex queer space on campus. How do you find it? Well yes It is a part of Uni. marriage pro/ con debate: a. clamours for a respectable sexuality (which might be a Who I have to thank are people who have been here before and who are here nice touch for you but frankly my dears, now and I can get involved. No problem; Busy, busy, busy - queer room. fuck off, Who wants to encourage the State to intensify social normalization by proving Here is to a spectacular semester 2 here at UQ. An Introduction to the rest ot that we are all as easily legislatable as the my life. hetero-nuclear family?) b. disciplines the rest of us who are 'queer' in relation to Thanks again marriage law: single people, sex workers, adulterers, divorcees, those under the age Mature age student of consent, promiscuous, non- monogamous... by dint of elevating the status of married couples, c. Legitimises a 'public opinion' against academia: ie, that Reading list: silly heterosexist binary by focussing the they're all wankers. Queer students need Left Legalism, Left Critique, eds Wendy tension between male-nfemale couplings to defend not only access points of a free Brown + Janet Halley, Durham : Duke and male+male and female+female, when education, but an education that is free to University Press, 2002. this is really only the tip of the iceberg. As I critique society and encourage new ways was reading Judith Butler she questions of thinking about how we live. See that now, 'homosexuality' in public opinion, is Queeriy Classed, ed Susan Raffo, South why the "prospect of "becoming political" End Press, 1997. depend[s] on our ability to operate within no longer taught as a pathology and there is widespread contestation of the term that discursively instituted binary and not to Polysexuality ed Frangois Peraldi, 'homosexual': thank god for the queers! as, and endeavour not to know, that the Autonomedia/Semiotext (e), 1995 (reprint). sexual field is forcibly constricted through 11. So, this is really about the power of accepting these terms [of intelligibility/ Days of War, Nights of Love, Crimeth Inc, love. Thank you celine dion. We must undertanding]?" Judith highlighted the 2001. question the validity of sustaining a problem for radical sexual politics when "relationship" with one other person, and you actually want to be "unrepresentable", not in a should 1/ shouldn't I context at all. "a site of pure resistance, a site unco-opted This is not about 'the other person'! We by normativity", and yet stiil self reflexive must look at how the idea of 'love between and non-dogmatic, not to stay hard and two people' is formed/ shaped/ influenced/ fast to one single claim. overturned/ corrupted/ purified/ changed/ simply used by the Church and the State 9. "The road to freedom for gays and and Capitalism to their own ends. Love is lesbians is paved with lawsuits" not something that is eternal and innate spokesperson. National Center for Lesbian and a fact of life that the Rights (America) The SSMM's major tool in ii-iiiii Church+State+Capitalism 'works around'/ this campaign was the secular legal accommodates; it is a fact of their system of Western liberal democracies collective creation as well. See: the because it is obvious that there are certain wedding industry dedicated wedding economic and social benefits to those who stationery shops, bridal magazines, are married. Even though this campaign wedding transport etc etc vomit on the arose in recognition that marriage is a bridal veil, fall on the wedding cake. x\.? determinant of material conditions it legitimises the discriminatory power of 12. Because this is the lie I reckon we get: marriage to 'elevate' and ennoble those that the State/ Govt has nothing to do with J'-r- r. >/ couples (because they can only be our personal relationships, and the Church ..AJ**!*')- couples) at the expense of those who are is only primarily concerned with 'love' in not coupled. relation to 'god'/ whatever. 10. Challenge for queer students to rise 13. So, I'm thinking about love, hope and above, or successfully defend the revolution. And destroying sexuality conservative backlash and manipulation of -UQ Q. 1/ % 1) T" 1 0 'hf union 15 As Croome presses for mandatory anti- homophobia kits in schools nationwide, he is often asked, what's the rush? To that question he responds, "Tell that to the young man who is beaten up each day on the school bus; tell that to the young woman who is on the verge of suicide. • (-:r0.r!-v-^A':^^;,..-,l>,^_:i,y^x-j...x..-^ ^ ,.•..„•..,. ' •• "The sooner these policies are introduced," da."yiAar.&' says Croome, "the sooner we can reduce Each year, the UQ Union Queer Collective Anyone who doubts that homophobia is a violence in our schools." prioritises campaigns which we fee! are real problem in schools should speak to school counsellors. vitally important for the wellbeing of (Greg Callaghan, "Worst Days of Their lesbian, gay bisexual and transgender The stories are depressingly familiar: daily Lives", The Australian, April 10, 2000) people. assaults of teasing, bumps and shoves in If you would like to become involved in the the corridor, being spat on, steely-eyed This year, the collective has launched a campaign or would like to suggest further glares, which often graduate to kicks, "Schools Outreach Campaign". campaigns to the collective, please come punches, beatings, even death threats, A along to Queer Collective meetings, The aim of the campaign is threefold: recent study by the Australian National Thursdays at 1pm during semester time, University described homophobia in our 1. In recognition of the many meeting room 3, UQ Union Administration schools as "endemic, extensive and disadvantages queer students face in the Building. education system and wider society our savage". collective is determined to make a Alternatively email or phone us: Darryl Murray a coordinator with Family difference in the lives of young queer High Planning in Queensland insists that "we School students by offering hope and Khrys (Male Queer Officer) have hit only the tip of the iceberg." The affirmation to as many young people as we reason being that most gay and lesbian [email protected] can possibly reach, We see this initiative as teens are far too ashamed or scared to a bridging program which will empower Ph: 3377 2200 (ext. 385) seek help. young queers to hang in and see some light past the end of the nightmare that Amber (Female Queer Officer) Surveys both here and in the US suggest school can be for them. the suicide rate for young gays and [email protected] 2. As part of the Queer Collective's broader lesbians is about three times greater than Ph: 3377 2200 (ext. 386) aims, we wish to strengthen ties to external for their heterosexual peers. organisations that are active and Combine that with the landmark results of a Kris Coonan (Resources Organiser and committed to helping young queers. Since survey of 1200 rural school children in counselling/referral/advocacy for Igbti the campaign's inception two months ago, Victoria, Tasmania and Queensland - which students) we have begun a process of Collaboration revealed 11 per cent of students did not with Open Doors Igbti youth sen/ice and [email protected] classify themselves as heterosexual - and Family Planning Queensland's Education you have a possible epidemic of Ph: 3377 2214 Department. Our ultimate aim is to have a discrimination. strong and liberatory program offered to all Queensland schools. When the survey's coordinator, Dr Lynne Hillier of La Trobe University tried to 3. As part of our commitment to supporting excavate the issues behind those statistics, jG<>aPC)RlTr queers on campus, we have responded she struck a deep slab of resistance. "Most whole-heartedly to the desire of our gay and lesbian kids were too terrified to collective members to make a difference in speak out," she says. the lives of young people still stuck in the homophobic and transphobic High School "One young boy yelled that gay foetuses system. For many in our collective, this is should be aborted." another step on the road to coming into their own power. Croome, 33, who has been fighting for gay and lesbian rights for most of his adult life - "Just about every recent study indicates he was instrumental in the the most traumatic and severe prejudice decriminalisation of homosexual acts in encountered in society happens in Tasmania in 1997 - says the 11 per cent schools," says Rodney Croome, who has figure "translates into hundreds of been employed by the Human Rights thousands of youngsters, many of whom Commission to set up the Outlink network. endure terrible levels of cruelty daily". About 70 per cent of gay bashings, "Schools are the crucibles of homophobia, Croome adds, occur at school. and the scars left on vulnerable students can last a lifetime." Only education, Homophobia is the last bastion of Croome insists, can break the matrix of acceptable prejudice, insists Croome, anti-gay bigotry: "Young people have to be which is why anti-racism kits are taught that homophobia is uncool, in the compulsory in high schools, and anti- same way racism is uncool." homophobia kits are not. Translation: one form of prejudice is more acceptable than another. »>?:.• .i^^i^^iv. :.t:. .UQ 14 union £ -M 9 9. 0 9. •T -UQ President's Report union Well it's been a busy few months in the start campaigning two weeks before that so trends or boldly going where no person has Union since my last report, its almost hard to be prepared to be harassed, A stupid time to gone before. In fact I am the third Queer believe that the current exec will soon be out hold elections if you ask me (and this time President in a row... so in fact I feel slightly of office. It's not yet time for my ruminations they didn't) as it means that students will be passe. However it has been an honour to and musing on the year so please stay busy cramming for exams etc and quite work within the Student Union this year and tuned to the next edition on my breakdown annoyed at being disturbed. The logic to represent the students of UQ, likewise it of what's happened this year. But for now behind it all was that Arts and SBS students has been an honour to be an openly gay here's what been happening. wouldn't be on campus to go out and vote president. Two things that stand out in my for the left (do prove them wrong for me mind this year are; firstly eariier this year our Reunion Week please). Obviously a large importance is Secretary thought it might be nice to have Reunion week this year was somewhat of a placed on this year's election because of the council tour the colleges, our first and last current split executive, it will be a question of mixed bag, while some parts were very stop was in fact St. Leos where much who can reclaim the Union, can the left do it successful other parts were not. Market day grandstanding was had (by my liberal or wilt i: fall entirely to the young liberals. as always was a great success with the comrades of course) trying to convince The answer ultimately is up to you... just highest club turnout and participation ever, college students that we wasted more make sure your voice is heard and your vote it's good to see that our campus culture is money on queer and women students than is cast. still alive and well. Revitalise was not the we did on them. On one of the numerous success that it usually is with many times I got up to speak I recall hearing quite Academic Life problems developing on the night; my hat loud and cleariy "oh here comes that poofter however does go off to our brand new There have been rafts of University president again." Quite catchy I thought, Activities Organiser for making the best of a committees which I have attended which perhaps I should start having my belongings bad situation in her baptism of fire. Students have resulted in some fairly positive monogrammed PR This sen/ed to remind of UQ can expect much from this staff outcomes. Honours students now have me of a few things, that no matter how member in the future me thinks. across the board guidelines to ensure intelligent and learned you become, and no fairness to all, the one thing we haven't been matter how much you surround yourself with Referendum successful in yet is getting them to be firmly civilised society, bigotry and intolerance will As many of you have probably heard by now recognised as postgrads but it's a strong always exist... that and some people never the results of the referendum are in with a step in the right direction at least. A whole mature beyond the age of twelve. The resounding NO vote in the majority. The raft (hmm my boating analogies continue I second point to stand out in my mind was at results In fact were quite interesting with see) of guidelines and HUPPS (a trendy the annual Sorry Day Dinner; at this event close to 3 300 people voting over a period of University word for policy) on assessment the President gives a speech on behalf of three days. This voter turnout rivals that of including the absolute banning of bell the Union. How my speech was structured normal voter turnout during the week long curving, compulsory course outlines with and my message aside 1 ended up coming Union election period... a sign of things to criteria and assessment weightings, and out to 400 complete strangers, many of come perhaps? some firm guidelines on remarking and blind whom were indigenous elders. As someone marking. Some real progress has been who has been 'out' for five years and who Elections made in this area so it's up to students now doesn't hide their sexuality I can honestly Yes my friends the annual elections have to make the University keep to their own tell you it was both the hardest and most been called (I can hear the hooting and rules. Let us know if you catch anyone in the liberating thing I have ever done. hollering now from you all). The nominations act we'll be happy to bust'em. have opened and closed with a full list of Well that's my ramblings and musing aside. candidates available on the notice board of Queer Presidency Enjoy your September holidays and be sure level 4 in the Union Complex. My word to the One couid hardly let the Queer edition of to stay focused on your University work. So wise: voting takes place in the last week of Semper go by without having a few words to until my final column, farewell and adieu. October, please note that this is the last say. Queer Presidents are hardly a new Aaron Marsham week of your classes. People will probably thing, and I'm certainly not starting any new I have also spent time working with Cheers fornow, Gill Greetings all! International students, meeting students at The editors have kindly allowed me a little the airport as they first arrive in Australia space to introduce myself. My name is and helping them get settled in to their Gillian Brannigan accommodation and locate local shops and Gillian (that's with a hard 'G') but I don't Women's Rights Organiser mind being called Gill. I have taken over the other services. Most recently I have been position of Women's Rights Organiser for working for Link-Up (Qld), an indigenous University of Queensland.Students Union community organisation that helps to the next 15 months while Toni Lawson has St Lucia 4067 QLD : ;. ' ^;;;:-;;:;;, a break. Please feel free to come in and see reunite members of the Stolen Generation •ph;(07)'33772i242:•:;;••::/-\:;^v ;.|":;::^isj me if you need assistance with any with their families. These experiences have concerns, complaints or issues you may increased my ability to recognise and. fax(07)3377;22Sa;::;:r advocate for people dealing with race-; have or even just to have a chat. I have over ;g.brannigan ©^uq^ejiu^^ ten year's experience of dealing with based discrimination Issues. Once again if I' numerous gender related issues, especially am unable to assist I will help you to locate someone who can,I am really looking those of concern to women students. If I am • .'•'. ,".'•"'••' >^':- .'''V''(f''-" ••;•„'}'...•":'•V'^.•^• .>*":'' unable to provide the assistance you need I fonward to making a difference and meeting will help you find the appropriate contacts. a lot of you here at UQ. -UQ 0, 'I' £ 9. T) ^ 1 0 'hf 15 AMNESTY CREATIVE WRITING COMPETITION WINNERS This August, the Amnesty UQ club A Pathway to Peace. ran a Creative Writing Competition on the theme of "Human Rights." Entries could take the form of any Wc look oul a: the worid fiction or non-fiction genre, and With eyes that define people by the colour of their skin. were to be 500-700 words, or at least 70 words for poems. With ears thai deline people by the accent in their voices. The Amnesty UQ would like to And with hands thai deliver vengeance al war. thank all those who participated in Bui eyes and ears and hands the competition and congratulate them on the high standard of Are all confined lo the realm of our bodies, entries received. The winner of Which wiil dissolve into the Earth, wiih lime. the competition is Shelley Moore, who wrote "The Last Day of My Life", and the runner-up is Dominika Soszka with her poem If we were all blind or deaf or disabled. "Pathway to Peace". We hope you Perhaps only then would we realize, enjoy their work as much as the judges did! Tliat the worth of a human being Lies beyond his image or his name. If we all learned lo hear and see and speak with our hearts. Perhaps only then. Could we join hands as brother and sister To walk sofilv over the Earth as one. Marking with each step, A Pathway to Peace. Dominika Soszka -UQ JCi uriion n WRITING The Last Day of My Life COMPETITION Shelley Moore WINNERS Hi I'm Shelley and welcome to The Last brought in hundreds of now, harsh policies. I'm starting to really wish I could just go Day Of My Life. Sounds like one of those I tried, like most people, to ignore the back to 2003 and stop the dangerous dodgy TV game shows doesn't it? situation, but one day 1 had to face up to trends before they had gotten out of Somehow, when I was younger, I'd always this new reality A squadron of YOBBO's control. Oh, and to tell them what's going to imagined that the last day of my life would (Young and Old Battlers Banishing happen on Neighbours in 10 years time. be more glamorous. Obviously not if i got Outsiders) surrounded my house while 1 And that alien life gets discovered living on hit by a bus or poisoned by my mum's was having lunch and told me to "drop the Earth, disguised as the Prince of Wales. cooking, but if I could know in advance that sushi onto the floor and step away from it They didn't quite get the facial proportions I only had one day left to live then 1 wouldn't slowly." Foreign food had been made illegal right but no one seemed to notice, not until waste a moment of it! Did you ever do that (I knew this but there's only so many meat 2007 when he ate the Queen that is. - argue with your friends about what you'd pies you can take) and I was charged with do if the earth were going to end tomorrow? Un-Australian Behaviour and sentenced, Trouble is, I can't go back in time, or I'm There always seemed to be two types of without trial, to execution. sure people would be outraged with what people - the spend-time-with-family-and- the future could hold in their own country. friends people and the stuff-it-1-always- No doubt this is all breaking a few hundred Sounds pretty ludicrous, until you realise wanted-to-go-skydiving people. Personally international treaties not to mention the that even in 2003 the same sort of I was a skydiver. Declaration of Human Rights, but no one persecution was already happening in challenges Australia anymore because Australia, only then it was hidden away in Unfortunately, what I didn't consider was they have lots of big scary weapons. 1 could the desert behind razor wire. But sitting in that the possibilities might be a little more technically claim refugee status if I ever this cell on The Last Day Of My Life, I have limited than that. At the moment, with just managed to escape from here, but the rest the two consolations of Australia's excellent under 18 hours left of that sweet feeling of of the worid has taken on Australia's idea of national security, and as much fish and existence, my options are: a) run madly "sending refugees back to where they chips as I care to eat. around my tiny cell, screaming and come from" so I'd no doubt just end up pounding on the concrete walls until 1 back in this cell sooner or later. Irritating is collapse on the floor, b) perch sadly on my kind of an understatement. hard wooden bed and reminisce about the good times of my 29 years, or c) bitch about the injustice of my impending death tomorrow. Out of a pretty pathetic choice, the last option appeals to me most because, really I am more than a little pissed off at my situation and had rather made plans for the next 50 years. I suppose 10 years ago, in 2003, no one would have even imagined that 1 could be sitting in a jail cell in Canberra awaiting my death. At that time I would have been 19 and innocent, going to uni and avoiding study frequenting shady pubs in the Valley enjoying sunshine, coffee and with my greatest problem being how to stop my hipsters from falling down. Sure, I knew people suffered, that not everyone had the same basic human rights that I enjoyed, that for some people it really was The Last Day Of Their Lives. But not in my backyard. Not me. It all started back then though. After finding only apathy towards his ill-treatment of refugees, the evil Prime Minister gleefully rubbed his hands together and put into action the second stage of his plans for worid domination, assured that no one would do anything to stop him, Australia lost all pretence at being democratic and -UQ CL H H D T' <] 0 1^ union 17 speaking out? Hannah -Telford Should strong, independent women speak out against based on structural oppression, yet not feel oppressed. This couid oppression? I had a conversation a couple of weeks ago about be due to a number of factors. They may not be aware they are this issue and since then have begun to investigate the opinions of oppressed or their background could have assisted with removing a small group of women in order to answer this question. Many of certain structural oppressions. For example, a well-educated, the women I spoke to raised very similar ideas. The only middle-class woman would not experience the same level of differences were their approaches and how they came to their oppression as a less-educated woman with a lower socio conclusions. These were due to differences in backgrounds, economic background. particulariy in relation to their experiences with oppression, socio When discussing autonomous organising I discovered that many economic status, educational level and to some extent their of the women I spoke to had differing opinions on what it was, how political persuasions. Of course, there were also areas where their it works, and the benefits of such organisations. For the purpose opinions differed. But let's go back to the question - is the answer of this article, autonomous organising is a concept that describes yes or no? a situation where those who share some common life experiences If the answer is yes, it could be argued that strong, independent (usually based on the ability or inability to access power) discuss women should speak out against oppression as they have a better and make decisions in a space free of interference or influence by chance of achieving a positive outcome. Why? This could be those who are more accustomed to power or exercising social, based on the premise that these women tend to be more economic or political power over others. confident, challenging, argumentative, determined and goal- oriented. These traits alone could determine success in a situation During my many conversations with the women who contributed to where they need to speak out against oppression. In particular, this article, it was often those women who had experience with these characteristics increase the probability that their voices will autonomous organising groups (or collectives) that placed a be heard in a still male-dominated structured society. greater importance on their existence. When determining the role that a woman, who identified as strong and independent, played in If the answer is no, it could be argued those most affected by the group the responses varied. Those women who held less oppression have a greater insight and therefore should speak out significance for autonomous groups, generally stated the roles of against oppression. In this way they could lead the struggle in leading, organising and/or facilitating should be performed by terms of autonomous organising. Why? Those most affected by those who are the most qualified or skilled. Whereas, a general oppression, based on gender, race, sexual orientation, etc, have a consensus from the women who had participated more actively greater understanding of what it is like to be in that oppressed with autonomous groups placed a higher importance on situation. In relation to a strong, independent woman outside of oppressed persons taking on the roles of leadership, organisation the oppression leading the struggle, there is the danger of and/or facilitation. However, most of the women agreed on the assuming they know what is best for others. However, this article idea of "skilling up" individuals who were being oppressed, so that does not imply that women who identify as strong and they developed the abilities to lead, organise and/or facilitate. independent are not affected by oppression. To further this discussion, what benefits can individuals bring to an Further, even though strong, independent women may embody autonomous organising group? A woman who identified as strong confidence, the ability to challenge, debate and argue, and independent could empower those around her by her actions, determination and goal orientation, does the fact that these traits thoughts and words. Empowerment is a potent tool in fighting have historically been perceived as being male-characteristics oppression by raising peopie's consciousness but empowerment impose a form of structural oppression? This oppression may be is a two-way process. Listening to the experience of an oppressed based on an undermining of those trying to achieve strength and situation will lead to a greater understanding of not only that Independence by someone or society saying what a woman situation but of other inequalities in society. Individuals could should or should not be. provide a support network for those within the group and create a collective feeling of empowerment. There is also the concept that Of course, this leads to defining oppression - it is the condition together we are stronger and a united front Is more beneficial for where an individual or group is prevented from the privileges all. experienced by others due to an imbalance of power. This is just one definition. Many of the women who contributed to this article Whether or not this article has answered the question - should had slightly different views of what constitutes oppression and the strong, independent women speak out against oppression - is difference between being oppressed as opposed to feeling almost irrelevant. Perhaps it should just be everyone. The fact is Oppressed. There a difference between an Individual being that to some degree each of the women who contributed to this oppressed and/or feeling oppressed. An individual could article and identified as being strong and independent, do act and physically be oppressed in a given situation, for example a woman speak out against oppression. Would you do the same? who is raped. However, If the prevailing conditions in society allow for a particular group of people to be more likely to experience violence than others, then an individual does not have to experience this violence to be affected and modify their behaviour Kramarae, C. and Treichler, R A. (1992) Amazons, Bluestockings accordingly For Example, the prevalence of media reports and, and Crones, Pandora Press: London. importantly wamings of attacks on women have changed the way they behave and where they go based on the threat rather than an pctual j^vent. Therefore, even though they have not been Contributions; .by: Sarah Botham, Kris Coonan, Claire jOppfejfeci in this instance, they can still feel oppressed. English; Margaret Telford, Mel Venville, Jeni Walters and A|ern^tiVe!y you could argue that an individual was oppressed UsaWhite. • -. -UQ IS union (M 9 9. 0 9. '£ 'T PARTS OF ORIGINAL DOCUMENT MISSING OR ILLEGIBLE If a man perhaps watches footy, drinks beer women are out in the work force, men have and has sex with other blokes then two out been left to pick up the pieces of how we ARE of three is certainly not good enough. The identify ourselves as men. With women judgment handed out by the typical now at work we can no longer be the Australian Bloke is that he is most definitely breadwinner, the provider and protector of less of a man and more than this there is the family unit. Women can and will earn BLOKES something wrong with him. Now how is any more than their husbands leaving the men of this In house fighting actually serving us unable to use the old 'bread winner' as men? 1 am lead to believe, by David identity This situation along with many OK? Gilmore's 1990 book. Manhood in the others where women have been able fo flaking: Cultural Concepts of Masculinity, claim their rightful share of participation that these mechanisms of masculinity are in within the community has highlighted the TOBY DAVIDSON place so that we can survive as a species. need for us as men to base our masculinity Gilmore states in his work, "We may regard on something else. And what perhaps may Living in Australian society for the past 27 'real manhood' as an inducement for high this new basis be founded on? years I am at times left wondering. What I performance in the social struggle for scare What I propose is not man, the am curious about is if Australian Men, resources, a code of conduct that advances breadwinner, but man the nurturer. Like Blokes, are actually doing OK as a result of collective interest by overcoming inner women, we have a powerful nurturing the image we have chosen for ourselves. I inhibttions"(Page 223), instinct. It is what made up that old hunter, wonder if who we are and how we Are we then forced to prove ourselves men protector, and provider stuff; our desire to understand ourselves as men needs by achieving? If our dominant care for our loved ones and our community. reviewing. Is the Australian model of understanding of Masculinity is equated We can use this energy to care for our masculinity actually benefiting men? Is it with beer drinking, footy and sex with environment, our communities, and to really working for us, and is it working for women then what sort of bloke will be king spread understanding. Wouldn't it be great society? of the heap? A drunken promiscuous yob if a bloke's masculinity was called into seems to be the height of Manliness on this question not on what sort of clothes he has I wonder if the problem isnit that the scale and what does this man really have on but whether he was willing to help out in barriers of masculinity have not been to offer the community other that a local community working bee? pushed far enough. I can see that for aggravated assault. women in the past thirty years our concept Wouldn't it be great if this man the nurturer of femininity has broadened. Through the As Australians we are free to be exactly was able to support his fellow bloke into work of the feminist movement our who we choose. To dress as we choose, to seeing who he really wants to be rather understanding of what it is to be a woman have sex with whom we want, and work in than forcing him to conform to an out dated have changed. It has now become more any given occupation, as we so desire. All set of standards. Standards that have lost acceptable for a woman to choose careers of these are facts of law and yet we men their use and are actually only working once closed to her, enjoy a wide range of choose to limit ourselves, We limit what is against us. We have been left with a need social pursuits, and have children or not as acceptable manliness, and in the process a to change our concept of Masculinity as it she so desires. Where once to be a woman whole lot of men are left out in the cold, causes us to strive for dominance, when all was to raise a family and support a unable to either identify with other men or any of us really wants is a couple of mates husband, now being a woman is a far function freely in society without prejudice about who know us, and treat us well. broader concept. And women are and harassment. We as men make these supporting this emerging understanding of pressures that bind us. We give ourselves womanhood as a varied expression these straight jackets to live out our lives in. governed by personal choices. This new Our rules make it difficult for us to explore freedom to follow dreams once closed to our sexualities, to explore new lifestyles them has seen women take power over and even new interests to pursue. We are themselves and their lives. Power that was unable to love and accept each other as we once held by men. all choose to be. Aussie Blokes are all stuck competing over masculinity like it What 1 have not seen is a broadening of was a finite resource, over when in fact it is Masculinity We have a lot of work to do a limitless energy we can all feel in our own and could learn from the way women have way. been able to redefine their role in society The dominant belief of Australian Men Do women compete within their own about ourselves has hardly changed in the gender to assert what it is to be a woman? past thirty years. Hegemonic masculinity Is there one dominant group that is able to still exists. There is a belief that there is dictate to the whole what is the 'right' way some type of man, some interpretation of to be a woman? In our recent history 1 think masculinity that is more favourable, more this was surely the case. Women were masculine than others. This idea of course expected to get married, stay at home, and Is the great Aussie Bloke. He is the one be The carers for children. Other women who loves to drink beer, watch football and would look down on you if you were fuck women. It is for him that the lion's pregnant out of wedlock or for some share of masculinity is awarded. reason chose not to be with a man at all. What of the men who don't drink beer, don't My grandmother speaks of her days in the watch footy and don't choose to have sex Queensland Education Department where with women? Are they any less a man? women were sacked once married, as they According to our current standards of would obviously want to stay home to cook manhood the answer is yes. and clean for their husbands. Now that -UQ a li 9 IE T 1 T" 1 0 '}^ union IQ Howard Now Making Parliamentary Decisions Using Paper Toy Karene Arundell Apin'K-cheeked, white-haired old guy in a tuxedo presents Howard with the miracle toy In an attempt to re-vamp pariiament's underbelly. The operator selects one of Already political watchers have pointed rather inert approach to resolving the the numbers written at the top of the toy the finger at the mysterious white-haired country's troubles, John Howard has and 'opens' it backwards and forwards old bloke who gave Howard the toy unveiled a new quick-fix, pro-active that number of times until the toy's blaming the unknown figure for approach to problem-solving: a paper innards are opened to reveal a selection introducing his secret agenda to decision-making toy of infinitely cool of colours inside (photo). The user then Australian Parliament. "1 don't know what proportions. lifts up the flap of their favourite colour this old fellow's game is, but this toy is and reads their fortune. not only dangerous but immature and "I have a very, very exciting high-schoolish, and I don't like the way announcement to make," Howard said in According to insiders, Howard has been the way it's affecting Johnny" another a voice quivering with suppressed spending hours in solitude, playing with mysterious colleague hissed in passing excitement at yesterday's press his toy at The Lodge. Already the toy has to a reporter. "We'll talk more later, but conference. "A lol of you may have been responsible for a number of snap right now I'm due for a game of truth-or- noticed that, so far, our government's decisions which would usually be dare at The Lodge." attitude toward tackling problems has discussed at length in pariiament, sucked, to say the least. But, my fellow including that of Howard's taking steps to Australians, those times are over. From repair Australias damaged relationship Upon selecting "5, yellow" the decision now on I'm going to stop thinking and with the U.N., deciding to reassess the making toy recommends John Howard start acting, and you're all coming along Health Department's stance on bulk have a money fight with Graham for the ride. Today, for instance, I'll be..." billing, and invading France "for the hell Richardson; and (inset) the magical Howard broke off to momentarily consult of it". However, there are those who fear decision-making paper toy the paper toy before lifting his head in that Howard is letting the toy overtake victorious discovery,"- ringing up George his life, following its instructions as he Bush for a sleepover!" The assembled does to the absolute T. crowd then fell into frenzied applause, prompting a quick spurt of celebratory "He does everything that that thing tells break-dancing from Howard. him to, and it's going too far," claimed a parliamentary figure who wishes to The strangely-shaped, mysterious remain anonymous. "I've visited him a decision-maker, delivered to Howard by few times at the Lodge and he's been some grey-haired bloke at one of high repeatedly at me to 'try it.' That's fine society's recent tuxedo-wearing awards- when it's something like, "sit down and night-type shindigs (see photo), has discuss international politics", not so fine drawn much analysis from the media. when it says, "Kiss the person closest to The toy is believed to be based on a you!", or, "Join Saddam". But I've said prototype used by pre-teen girls for too much already," murmured the deciding everything from which clothes alarmed source, before departing to to wear to which boys to date, and is oversee official business involving operated by the user inserting their industry, tourism and resources. thumbs and forefingers in the toy's -UQ 20 union !M 9 9 0 9 by the rest of his team being away failure to comply with this initiative should composing a scurrilous leaflet about make for a very fine time at next year's Declan's sexual proclivities to sidle up to National Union of Students (NUS) llluminate's stall. His manner suggests he Conference in Hawaii. has got something more on his mind than the Meals on Wheels meeting he is going to "Nobody get into any debates about the attend shortly for his boss. need to serve real food in the refectory or the merits, or otherwise, of the new Dannii "Hi Andrew", Declan and Damian slur in Minogue single. Stay focussed, look humble unison. Harried students hurry by not noticing winter and if you have got a spare moment try and get rid of the graffiti Andrew wrote in the has given v/ay to spring or the t-shirt clad "How's the campaign going? Tenth one isn't toilets. We don't want the Electoral Officer groups assembling in the space between it? Don't suppose you want to tell us where blaming us for all those references to main hall and the eatery. Hopeful and the rest of your team has gone?" adds Adrian's small pecker in the John Dawkins current student politicians also rush about in Damian sarcastically Building lavatories. an agitated state not associated with their grades slipping from "Conceded Pass" to "Just printing our queer policy I think", The group heads off in different directions, "Bugger Off and Find a Job in a Junior Andrew answers in the petulant tone his while Declan leaves to change his shirt and Minister's Office". Yes, it's election time and Young Liberal colleagues have gotten used redo his hair. Damian allows himself a the air is thick with an excitement unfelt by to of late. moment's reflection and a Marlboro Red. only 95% ol the student population. Declan "Thank god the greens still smoke", he "There is something and Damian, presidential candidate and want to talk to you mutters to himself as he lights one of the campaign manager respectively for guys about. cigarettes ho has pilfered from the Illuminate, are sitting at the team stall when Environment Officer candidate. He notices "There are a few issues I believe we're not their talk turns from Iraq to more pressing the rest of Winston has returned but as addressing and I thought! might take it upon matters. usual they are just sitting around smirking. myself to raise them; not to undermine the Except Andrew that is, whose smirk has "Why aren't you wearing the team t-shirt", group but just to let students know what become a permanent scowl. Damian asks Declan tersely Winston will stand for when Adrian finally stops being preselected as our presidential "My second last year of doing this", he "It's crap", responds an even terser Declan. candidate. Unfortunately the Liberal Club is thinks with some sadness until his mood drier than an Evangelical Students' changes dramatically with the sudden arrival "Illuminate - Lighting Up Your University with Convention these days, and twice as dull. Social Justice, Equality Feminism, of Betty the twin-set and pearls Young Liberal President and law student whose Revolution, Environmentalism, Disco Balls "Anyway, I better get back to the stall before voice sounds like a drill and chainsaw. and whatever else. Fortunately the print somebody pinches the Adrian - A Real gets so small you can't read past Up Your. Student for Real Students leaflets again. "Did you put that nasty graffiti up on the toilet As the leader 1 can look a bit different, You haven't seen Mitchell from Beazley walls because if you did I'm going to tell the anyway". have you, Damian?" Electoral Officer and he'll make Illuminate "Declan, you are decked out in jeans and a "Probably trying to find a better name". pay for the damages? Colorado shirt. You might look different from "Besides it's not true and I should know". the group but not from every other bloke on "Right". campus. With Andrew's departure, Damian starts Andrew takes another drag on his smoke while preparing to respond. He thinks again "You accepted the vote to let the giving the recently gathered Illuminate their to himself but more happily this time, "My first tasks for the day immoderate left, the greens, women's and second last year of doing this". the queer area in, so now you have to put up with their contributions, even if it means "Steven, Mick, Anthony Chris and Jessica, By Dariene Taylor here are some brochures to give out and endless meetings and a t-shirt that is like a yes, Jessica, I know leaflets are made from [email protected] grocery list for Ideology Mart". trees and that without trees sloths don't Feel free to visit my website at have anywhere to come down from when "Fine, 1 will put it on later", snaps an www.geocities.com/daris_2at unhappy and soon to be unstylish Declan. they need to take a crap but people need to be told how to vote. Especially make sure "By the way David wants to know if it's too you have them when you go to the late for the Democrats to join us". Engineering and Arts faculties. "Who?" "John, Stewart, Brian and Sandy here is the lecture bash list and yes, Brian, I know I "David". have given you Killing Off the Welfare State and Other Economic Rationalities 101 to do "I know who David is but who are the but think of all the potential recruits to the Democrats?" Socialist Liberation Front of Brisbane (SLFB) in that class. "I don't know, some fringe group or something". "Everybody else is to monitor the "Right, well tell David we don't have enough movements of those students who tell you room on our t-shirt for whatever it is the they have already voted even though the Democrats stand for". polls aren't even open yet. If they still haven't cast their ballot by the end of the At this point in the conversation Andrew, week get their names because we are going former student turned staffer for a junior to introduce a retrospective policy to make minister, has taken the opportunity afforded voting compulsory. The fines incurred for -UQ d 11 9 T) T' a 0 •?/ union 21 due to the European winter. It is also a star hotels, all included breakfast and some Contiki ritual that a morning song is played at included dinners. The only thing you really Touring the beginning of a long day's drive to put need to worry about is getting back on the everyone in an upbeat mood. 1 will never bus at a certain time and the rest is all hear "You make me feci like Dancing" in tho organized and worked out for you. Tour same way ever again. Managers will even give you a quick history, Throughout tips, language lessons of each country upon We were treated to a smorgasbord of arrival. This was very helpful, as i delightful, overwhelming European culture, embarrassingly suffered from culture shock such as museums in Paris, the Munich in Paris with panics of "Oh My God, these are Europe Beerhalls, a 5 course feast in Florence (aka real French-speaking people, not gorgeous as the wedding feast with Bruno on the French actors with English subtitles on SBS Amy Lee accordion and his daughter singing opera movies!". You only need to concentrate on arias), excellent locally guided walking tours having fun and enjoying yourself. Contrast Driving along Coronation Drive, I chuckled to of Imperial Rome and Florence, classical that with the independence and flexibility of myself as I spotted a tour bus turning into music concert in Vienna, the gondola ride going-solo of back-packing. Roma Street. Ah-ha! I was on my very own whilst drinking champagne in Venice and European Conquest tour seven months ago ending on an all-you-can drink night cruise in Speaking to backpackers at the Amsterdam and now I know what goes on in those buses! Amsterdam. It was a whirlwind of intoxicating Youth Hostel, I realized they had managed to culture. travel throughout Eastern Europe as well as Although moments such as seeing Paris light being on a lesser budget. Flying throughout up at night and the Van Gogh Museum in Europe can also be surprisingly cheap, due Amsterdam were amazing, I later found out to online budget airiines. Meeting fellow that was only half Ihe fun. Sharing such travelers your own age from Brazil or "Kodak moments" with 37 other total strangers England at hostels and going off on made the whole trip even more exhilarating. adventures also fills up the half-empty glass. It also means you are free to leave and On my first night in Paris, we ran into a bunch mingle as you wish, without the burden of of very loud, drunk and predominantly Aussie being "polite" and fear of being stuck with fellow travellers yelling "Aussie Oi Oi" at an people and having to make small talk in American bar who were ending their tour in situations that you would rather not. Paris. Little did I realize that that was a foreshadow of us in 21 days time in However, the turning issue is whether you Amsterdam. want and can afford the comfort and the luxury of a guided tour, especially if you are a 1. "Romance" (or should I say a fling or solo female such as myself. I liked the fact 1 two...) was always sharing a comfortable, clean twin There is something aoout being stuck with 37 single room with a giri my age (who other strangers for 21 days in a row. Perhaps However, the surprise stops in Verona (where i coincidentally was also a law student from most were feeling needy and or the very even rubbed Juliet's breasts to bring me luck Perth!). Therefore, I avoided having to fork desperate, lame excuse of missing their for love! And no, Juliet, 7 months later...your out on single rooms. partners back at home(yes, partners!). But good luck charm still has not sparked!), scoring let's just say the drinks must have been a free Longman Iced Tea because of a 4. "Memories...light the corners of my spiked at the space disco in Florence (just for tourmate's winning at the Monaco Casino (but mind" the record, 1 did stay very single and no, darn only later to have my camera stolen) and at the The tour is now, unfortunately almost a it, I did not meet Mr Right!). Hence, we were concentration camp in Mauthause, Germany distant memory due to my final year stresses all forced to wear sunglasses for our group were the icing on the cake. In bitter freezing and has me humming Barbara Streisand in photo overiooking Florence the very next snow and coincidentally on the anniversary of the freezing fourth level of the Law Library. day! (I was so convinced that I would look so its liberation, I could not even begin to imagine terrible that 1 did not bother ordering a copy) the sufferings of the stripped-naked Jews. It is also a tour tradition that emails, After having absorbed the wonders of what addresses are exchanged for promises of However, the whole group behavioural topic human being are capable of creating reunions and free accommodation around is a very interesting issue. I found myself (especially the frescos in the Vatican museum), the worid. I managed to meet up with a being much more conservative and quiet seeing the aftermaths of power abuse was a tourmate when I returned to London (and of than I usually am, as I found myself humbling but necessary reminder course made sure 1 caught up on all the conscious and mindful of the need not to get gossip - ie. 'Did X say Yes to Y's proposal?' - on anyone's nerves because we were, after 3. The 'eternal debate' of back-packing over coffee before heading off to Harrods and all, going to be stuck together for 21 days vs. guided tours Cambridge together!). (perhaps fearful of an "Andy" eviction). The Just as law students debate over fact that Brisbane is a very small town with natural/positive law in jurisprudence, young I guess the million-dollar question on the zero degrees of separation and that there travelers toss up the pros and ccns of guided reader's mind is the verdict to: "Would you go were surprisingly five other fellow travelers tours. Is back-packing in Youth Hostels the on another bus tour?". Unfortunately 1 have from Brisbane also made sure that I was way to go because it is cheaper, flexible and to say no. Not because I didn't have a great always on my best behaviour more independent? time. But rather, it is because I had such a great time and feel as if I have gotten Tour groups will also run into other I am lucky to have experienced the best of everything possible out of a Contiki tour. It simultaneous tours, in which a lot of both worlds, after having stayed on in a Youth has trained me and made me far more alert 'checking out' occurs within the first 5 Hostel (Hans Brinker), Amsterdam at the end for future adventures. After 21 days of non minutes. It is, as Toby Young describes it, of my tour. This inevitably caused some jokes, stop, hectic schedule, I felt more confident "peacocks parading and strutting their raised eyebrows and nudges from fellow tour and ready to travel by myself. But how on feathers". Then another exasperating mates due to Amsterdam's infamous coffee earth I managed to survive the very crazy but lOminutes of, "The Grass is Greener on the shops and Red Light District (to which I quickly also charming city of Amsterdam alone and Other Side"/ "Damn it, 1 wish t was on that explained and pleaded my case, 'No, it's returned to London via the Eurostar all in one tour...check out that guy/girl" Syndrome. because I want to see The International Court piece is another yarn. of Justice at The Hague! No, really!'). 2. The tour itself I must pay a tribute to our bus driver, Otto and The choice really comes down to whether Tour Manager, Sarah who kept us on you can handle long drives of up to 5 hours schedule and all cheerful despite our every day with the same people for up to 2 coughings (known as the "Contiki cough") weeks. The bonuses are the comfortable 3 -UQ union -M 9 9 0 9 r "1!?^P^* HoM) to GA/ictyour Hou4rem>ate/: o/^ep hy ^ep giAlde/ The/Chad/ So its well into second semester and your relationships in the share Dear (insert name of housemate here), house from hell are starting to fall apart. So how does a normally easy going student turn into the beast from hell to drive your Firstly I would lil masters/iPlfib. All lASOS students; woric'cl^d^;'^^^ I am particularly annoyed because if you had left me some time I with national and intematJonal scientists fiiom would have gladly cleaned up my mess without fuss. The fact that CSIRO, Australian Antarctic Division, the you left me some cowardly note after I spoke to you yesterday newiy-formed CRC for Antarctic Climate afternoon and said I would get to it in the next day or so just goes and Ecosystems, the Commission for the further to highlight your completely hypocritical nature. Conservation of Antarctic Marine Uving Resources, and other world-class I am normally an easy going guy who gets along with everyone but environmental agencies. frankly I have had a gutful. You are not an easy person to live with and I have had enough. Either you shape up or ship out. If you don't change your dirty habits then I suggest you move out. If you don't then I will. The choice is yours. Since you can barely afford to live here as it is I suggest you start looking for elsewhere to live but For more Information: should you decide to stay then I am quite happy to leave. The Course Coordinator, lASOS Private Bag 77, Hobart,Tasmania 7001. I look fonfl/ard to your note in response with your decision of future or3 .'vfvr UNIVERSITY Phone (03) 6226 2971.See also on the house living arrangements. <: ^TASMANIA web at wvvw,antcrc.utas.edu.aii/iasos Email to [email protected] »lll.|llll>N -UQ T) 'f 1 0 'W Q. 1' IE -R union 23 Unleash The Gimp With Chess Master Nik Stawski QUEER CHESS ;rr^t:S' COMMON CHESS MYTHS FACT: Chess is a male dominated Oi more interest io me is my sport. Does this mean that it's a observation that some chess haven for gay men seeking like- players appear to be completely minded intellectual types? Well, m asexual. They don't seem according to my research, it would interested in sex of any sort, and I seem that there is not a lot of openly seriously wonder whether they gay people in the chess world (to the even masturbate. These monk-like ^ best of knowledge, every Worid beings tend to be of the computer Chess Champion has been married geek mould, and have exemplary ... to a woman). I found many more focus in their chessic pursuits. references to queer chess moves mmMm Having said that, let me point out than queer chess people. The only that only a few chess players out 1.Nf3 d5 2.d4 cd 3.c4 e6 4.Qc2 ^here ;lopk!likeJn^rds. vMost players iQok^comRJS^iy^^ with W.}\ Nf6 5.g3 Nbd7 6.Bg2 Bel 7.0-0 0- j^Jsligi^l^ieodehtricjtJen^ .....^ 0 8.b3 b5 9.05 Ne4 10.Nbd2 f5 11.Bb2 a5 12.Ne1 Nxd2 13.Qxd2 ;|Sphie^f^i|d|T^^ artists, some e5 14.dxe5 Nxc5 15.Rc1 Bb7 l?fJhiijiie||Snil^ ||i)^||S|h&fetife^ 16.Nd3 Ne6 17.e3 c5 18.Nf4 Nxf4 iiB0tii®TlT^vWhble;c^ 19.gxf4Qd7 20.Rfd1 Rfd8 21.RG3 S^paiiilubjei^a^ised Ra6 22.Rd3 Rg6 23.Kf1 d4 24.f3 Pp8|fcpgi:s|erSr,and Wil b4 25.94 Ba6 26.Bh3 fxe4 SSeiypS^Sjiij^BI'eiakfa^t 27.Bxd7 Bxd3+ 28.Qxd3 exd3 iifiiilp^ipliiGtiitKe;. 29.Bb5 Rh6 30.Kg2 d2 31.Rxd2 Rf8 32.Re2 Rxf4 33.Kg3 Rfh4 pig^Si«®y^liir0lelvecl 34.Bc1 Rg6+ 0-1 sports. There can be intense rivalry (heterosexual) flirtation at school within chess, but close, lifelong chess tournaments, with good friendships formed away from the comic effect. Needless to say, board. So where are the queer chess Anderson gave lots of witty shit to players? I suspect that they're in chess players with his hilarious there, but firmly in the closet comments, and I for one loved it! Perhaps the chess society is an The point is that all is not as example of an oppressive, serious as some insist. Lighten up homophobic, micro-society. Or nerds, knockers, bullies and perhaps it pays no attention to such hippies. Lighten up people! It's just matters at all, focusing on chess, a game. chess and chess,.... and nothing else. Again, does it really matter? In Now that I've hopefully dispelled my experience, the chess worid some common myths about chess •;k:^y.r- ^.^••.'•,'- •.••" • .J%?;:!.:..V; Hifii •S.V-i', .',';.•• -..-V In this position, Peter might not be mated, i^^.;ifi'. ••••'. but he sure is screwed, so he resigned. -UQ 24 union S ^ U 9 X 9 9 10 9 •T Toilet Cubicle NON With the success of Phone Booth, (with the riveting premise of a man trapped inside a phone SEQUITUR: booth for an entire movie), Hollywood has desperately been seeking more excuses to spend minimal amounts of money on scenery. SEQUENTIAL Starring some as-yet unknown overseas actor desperately trying lo break into the Hollywood A- HORROR list, Toilet Cubicle follows the trials of a man trapped in a public dunny trying to piece together the pieces of illegible graffiti on the walls, in order to defuse the bomb sitting under the seat. He discovers the bomb has been Chris O'Regan hopes that he ivillbe placed by a zealously homophobic Pine Rivers Shire Council (\/layor, who is miffed that her plan able to sneak his submission in despite to remove toilet doors from their hinges was its content, because the editors do so kyboshed. Eric Bana was pencilled in to star, but love Latin titles. His interests include he was too busy making Chopper Two: Editing Ken Park, in which, through a hilarious mixup, Whinge repeatedly inserting long footnotes the notorious Reid gets a job on the Film and just to annoy everyone, and referring Literature Classifications Board. Cyclists. to himself in the third person. No A Clockwork Payback They're here, there and everywhere, particulariy on a route to uni. doubt he'd like to consider himself a f^el Gibson gets his revenge on those critics and community leaders who panned his ^'culture vulture", but lamentably the Some are more able than others. Some hyenas got there first and picked the controversial film The Passion by enlisting the help of that undisputed master of self-indulgent, are racers, some are not, some are just fit carcass clean, so he makes do with over-blown film making, Kevin Costner. Mel little bunny rabbits going for a ride. what he can. straps the critics to special chairs, with their eyelids held open while they are forced :o watch But all of them are smaller than cars, all of them are slower than cars, and all of them Recently I've been pondering, in my insufferably continual reruns of Kevin's latest movie. Costner pretensious way about the parlous state of produces, directs and stars in this epic set to a can very easily be squashed by cars. cinema in America. The question I asked myself bombastic score of a baseball-playing was: what was the last movie Hollywood bodyguard in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, who I wonder how many cyclists realise this. released that wasn't (a) a rehash of an earlier saves the world from nuclear catastrophe by Some can average 25 kmph. Some can movie, (b) a rehash of an earlier book, (c) a teaming Robin Hood and Wyatt Earp up lo help rehash of an earlier genre, or (d) featuring at John Kennedy restart the postal service. sprint faster than that down hill with a least one actor from Friends? Shockingly the Grateful Native Americans erect a giant statue of wind. Kevin in his honour. By the fifteenth hour, the closest thing I got to a positive was the equally critics are all brain-washed into following Mel's shocking The Fast and The Furious, enough to Whatever. Can they cruise at 60 with the peculiar brand ol ultra-conservative Catholicism. make anyone ponder that, if (here was any cars? justice in the world, Jerry Bruckenheimer would No. be making a living off scraping stuff from the Van Wilder 2: Iraqi Liason (l[raq]D4) underside of stadium bleachers, rather than Ryan Reynolds, having spent seven years Even if they can cruise at 55kmph, that fe repackaging it into box-office winners. desperately trying to get elected to the post of still not 60. Cars are going to want to over Party Liason Officer at an Australian university take them. Cars do their duty. They try to But it seems that the desperately risk-averse big student union, gives up and instead travels share the road - their road. They wait, studios only like to go with what they know. So overseas to the swingen'est batchelor party in original material is out: everything must be the world, being held by Uday Hussein. After the some times almost having to stop to based on either an existing movie, an existing party is bombed to the ground by wise-cracking change lanes to go around the cyclist. novel, or failing (hat a weC-known time period black sidekick/air pilot Will Smith, (he two form that can easily be mined for paydirt with the an unlikely friendship and then go on to battle The least you would think cyclists could merest scratching of the surface. The latest fad invading Alien terriorists. Fortunately the pair do, when they come to a side street, Is to is matchups of existing Just to prove my point, are able to infiltrate the Alqaedazoid mother veer to the left a little while there is room, I've taken the desperately unoriginal, gimmicky ship, and blow it to smithereens due to the alien and let the cars pass. Instead some step of providing previously unseen production computers' lack of rudimentary virus protection continually hog a third of the lane at an notes about proposed pictures soon to be hitting software. Notable for Gene Hackman's billionth inferior speed, keeping high the risk of a screen near you. Be warned. reprise of the role of "some American military they themselves becoming very guy". temporary road users. Root Pi The Full Monty Bend it Like a Purely Belter, Studio executives take "by the numbers" Did I mention cars are bigger than productions to a whole new level, when they Brassed-Off Billy Elliot bicycles? Stronger, faster and more team up the independent director of the ground- This British production is still in its early stages, stable than bicycles? Not necessarily breakingly incomprehensible mathematical but you can bet it'll include some unhappy, better than bicycles, but if both want the thriller pi, Darren Aronofsky, with creators of the marginalised group of funny-talking British incomprehensibly popular American Pie people who do something eccentric or same bit of road at the same time, the car franchise, with the aim of creating an unexpected to distract themselves from the will win. The driver may end up in jail, but incomprehensibly funny joint sequel. Attracted misery of their own lives, only to run into the driver will be alive. by the possibility of directing another film whose seemingly insurmountable odds, but then As long as cyclists remember that. mathematical function-based title is impossible overcome them in some sort of mustiy, feel-good to reproduce in most newsprint fonts, Aronofsky climax with a stupid song. The biggest hurdle so Miss S leaves in disgust upon discovering that the far is finding some piece of obscure slang that "function humour" promised to him by the can be used as the title. Set to be the biggest A driver who likes to get there American Pie crew wasn't exactly what he had in British box-office smash since Snatch Fiction: mind. .. Ritchie vs. Tarantino. (Preferably without killing anyone along the way) -UQ Q. 'l( £ iE 9 T) T" 1 0 'W union 25 Your Questions answered, by Aunty Jan! The world contains many mysteries. Why is the sky blue? Why DO birds suddenly appear? And why can't women go to the bathroom by themselves, dammit? The rules of etiquette have changed dramatically over the last 50 years. Once upon a time it was simple. Outside fork first, respect your elders and stand whenever a lady MODERN enters the room. However, somebody changed the rules without telling us. Who opens the door? Who pays for dinner? When do you have to send a thankyou card? Who gets to decide where the toilet seat goes? Over the past year, I've been asked a lot of questions about etiquette in the battle of the sexes. So, today I'm devoting a whole issue to them! Hooray! But be warned, if you're game to read on you'll discover the answers to many of the great mysteries of life, and you'll never look at the worid in the same way again... 1. Why do women always have to take their friends to the bathroom ? I'll start with this one, since men have pondered this Great Question since the dawn of recorded time. The reason is simple. Have you ever noticed that the lines for the ladies loos are soooo much longer than the queue for the gents'? Women travel to the toilets in groups because they know that they'll probably be in for a long wait when they get there, and they'll need someone to talk to in order to pass the time. If asked, it is very impolite for a woman to refuse to escort another woman on a trip to the loo. This probably started as a safety thing, back in the days when women were not supposed to go wandering off alone in case they ^'eJI victim to men with less than noble intentions (or stepped in something nasty - the worid before modern sewerage could be a dirty, scary place) Also, it was a good way to make sure that nobody got lost on the journey. Here's how it works in modern times. First, because we need to rearrange our clothing more than the blokes do, the actual 'bathroom business' takes about three times as long for the girls as it does for the boys. Add to this the fact that we also need more room. None of this squishing three people up to one trough for us! We need one stall each. So, collectively we have fewer resources and each individual needs to use more of them. Thus begins...'the Line'. Now, one does not want to be bored when one is in 'the Line', so one must bring somebody to talk to. She will often bring someone else to talk to as well, because one does not want to exclude one's friends from any important conversations that may take place. So now there are three people in *the Line'. Of course, the two 'conversation friends' will also have to stand in the Line', and since they've waited all this time, they may as well go too, because otherwise everybody will just have to come back again later and repeat the whole process. (This would be very inefficient, and one cannot have that!) Once conversations have begun in the Line', they cannot be stopped just because the front of the line has been reached. Conversations between women continue from within the stalls, causing distraction from the task at hand and increasing the time needed. Men don't understand this concept. For them it's eyes forward, no talking. It is the height of bad manners to engage another man in deep conversation while standing at the urinal. By now the line has grown, but it doesn't end there! There's still the epilogue. Now that all the girls in the group have finished in the loos, it's time to head for the sinks. There, hands will be washed, hair combed, makeup reapplied, opinions sought, and gossip continued. The process takes several minutes, and no one may leave until everyone is ready. So there you have it. The whole thing is just one big vicious circle. Women travel in packs because the lines are long, and the lines are long because women travel in packs. 2. Where does the toilet seat go? While we're on the subject of all things bathroomatical, let's consider the greatest sticking point in inter-gender relations yet created -the toilet seat. Women believe that it should always be kept down, as the rim is unsightly and should always be covered. Plus, how would you like it if you went to the loo at three in the morning and fell in because some idiot couldn't be bothered putting the seat down. -UQ 2 b union n 9 IE 9 L 0 9 'A 'T Men counter with, well we wouldn't fall in because we'd check to see it was there first. We have to sit down sometimes too! And anyway, if we left it down all the time you'd only complain that we pissed on the seat, which by the way is not our fault because our ^mr? equipment doesn't come with 100% accuracy! Sigh! The arguments have been the same for generations, and nothing has changed. MANNERS Modern etiquette dictates that whoever owns the toilet gets to decide where the seat goes. People who use it should return the seat to the position in which they found it. If there is joint ownership of a toilet, and the issue cannot be resolved, a simple By Aunty Jan compromise is to put the lid down at the end of each visit No discussion of bathroom etiquette would be complete without resolving the Great Toilet Paper Issue. Who changes it and which way does it face. The first one is easy - whoever finishes the roll MUST replace it. Contrary to popular belief, both men and women are guilty of the great toilet paper crime of leaving an empty roll on the holder (a variation of which includes leaving 2 squares on the roll and not changing it on the grounds that 'it wasn't finished yet'). The second issue is more complex. The pattern on the paper is designed so that is visible when the roll faces forward, however, there is no set etiquette law that states it must do so. People become very attached to having their toilet paper face a certain way. If you are bored at a party, go to the bathroom and reverse the toilet paper roll, then see how long it takes for someone to change it back again! It never takes very long! On the other hand, if you live with someone who persistently refuses to change the empty toilet paper roll, the quickest way to change his or her behaviour is to change the roll yourself, but put it in facing the wrong way. They will soon learn that if they want it to face the right way, they will have to change it themselves. 3. When do you have to send a thank-you card? Once upon a time you had to send cards for everything. These days we are much more slack. A general rule is that you should send thank-you card for big items and formal events (e.g. weddings, engagements, 18th and 21st birthdays, christenings, graduations etc). You should also send thank-you cards to people who would expect to receive them, (e.g. family members, your boss). Think about how you feel when somebody sends you a thankyou card. Even if it's not compulsory, it's still a nice thing to do. If you can't manage a card or a note, then a phone call is always appreciated, especially by family members. It shows that you appreciate them and the thought behind their gift, and if they've mailed it to you, it shows them you've at least received it. For a small thankyou (e.g. to guests who've come to your party), it never hurts to send a group email. If you've been invited to a party, you should always thank the host for inviting you, whether you can attend or not (i.e. RSVP. It is very rude not to reply to an invitation!) and then send a thankyou, either written or by phone after the event itself. Well, that's it from me! If you have any questions or comments for me, send me an email, care of [email protected]. Remember, next issue is my last one, so speak now or forever hold your peace! Not Happy Jan!!! Letters from you to me. Dear Aunty Jan, Is it true that women wear red lipstick to attract men and that it's meant to look like a vagina? If so, then what is eye shadow for? S. Daly. Dear S., I've heard this one too. I don't know who started it, but he or she must have very interesting dinner parties! As a health professional, I have seen many vaginas, and none of them look anything like a pair of lips (no teeth, for one thing!). No, women wear lipstick to make their lips stand out and look bigger, but not to make them look like vaginas. Red is nature's "look at me" colour (think of red back spiders, traffic lights and stop signs). It's the same with eyes, eye shadow makes eyes look bigger and more noticeable. The idea is to accentuate your best feature and to make people focus on it. This is why you should only highlight your eyes OR your lips, never both. It makes you look like you're trying too hard otherwise, PS. As letter of the week, you've won some free Schonell movie tickets. Please come into the semper office to collect them! •UQ CL 11 9: 9 'I T) T' 1 0 0/ union 27 'ARE>ISED SEMPER 15th August 2OG3 From: Ruphus To: Bruce • i:<'s&i•^i^•'^•yi•• Brace yourself, i my-fnebp, for the stately & I've done a lot of photocopying in my time, the-? There was no c^rd-reader via which to dignified remnarvts*';^6f our university and I'm not ashamed to admit that I revere activate the copier! It wasn'ijeVen'plugged upbringing - the last bastions of 'postgrad'! the copying machines of yesteryear. Their in! Muttering ill-temperedly,^l|iltjrte bullet - - have been taken away. Of course, an solid bulk was a comforting presence albeit momentarily - and'^^SQt rriyself to intellect as sharp as yours - honed by years through the uncertainty of my unravel the mysteriou^, pointless of butting against the unyielding 'critical' undergraduate studies, their apparent complexity of one of the newrage wonder- mass of Post-Colonial & Feminist Bullshit - archaic-ness leant confidence to me during copiers. The machine's spectacular lack of will no doubt already have discerned the honours, and their unflagging devotion has performance soon sent me off on a trek point of this lament. Yes, my old drinking more than endeared them to me throughout around campus, searching feverishly for a partner (at the bar of pointless gesticulation innumerable postgraduate misadventures. gem from the past; a simple yet endearing and unfulfilled promise), the 'old school' Why is this? Simply put, it's because these plodder of eariy vintage; a nugget amidst all photocopiers are NO MORE. They've faded majestic old dinosaurs worked! (A trait that, the fool's gold! away to ignominious non-recognition; gone despite Its fairiy blatant relevance, appears to meet up with the beanbags in the sky. to have been overlooked by those fuckers This mission terminated at the Biol Library, Doff your hat, brother of mine, and mourn... who've come to preside over the where there was only one 'old schooi'. The photocopy machines are gone! University's copying sen/ices.) What I'm tanker, but upon wtiich soriieone had at looking for when I go to photocopy a 400- least had the decency to admit to the I'm sure you'll have no trouble remembering page inter-library loan (in blatant horrible truth: DUE TO THE UNIVERSITY'S those heady undergraduate days - way contravention of all known copyright laws) is PHOTOCOPIER REPLACEMENT back when we were cooking up a collective the ability to copy simply & quickly.. And PROGRAM, THIS MACHINE Wia NOT BE quadruple major in English - when Victorian this is precisely what the new copiers will REPAIRED OR REACTIVATEb: •.So this Literature was in fashion, when John not do. was the crux of the matter! The, sturdy yet Donne's lecherous goats frolicked in the charismatic Type 40s are on 1he|ri,way.vpiit.- sun, and when the Undergraduate Library (In case you haven't had the 'opportunity' to And what are we to be left^;vy|h?..A;gitifur was filled,^to, the docks with photocopy become acquainted with these smug, gaggle of miniature, digljillyAoperated & 'machities'(a-veritable flotilla of old, grey compact little blighters, be warned: they're 'enhanced'horse-fuckere^lh^elikefSJDf^hich- twattleliiips);-Tiiey were the sort that you total horse-fuckers! They don't 'copy*, in the t shudder even to thlriK^bout®jiBy-^spit icclffitf re^^Vtwo buttons, my friend, 'copy' traditional sense of the word; they 'scan' paper out from undef^MjeMoQlWirito^iah; .anid _^educe', ^nd an indomitable will to get and then reproduce. Which is lovely It's just inaccessible cavem, and:geMliiSj,th6'pages; ^hskjpbJIdcine^Ttiese were the grand old not very quick.) are upside-down pr#umabjy.^sp'5:that|the: 'gentien^|ri^?bl^ph^^^ reproduction - morons of today can^r-^-^—^'-'"-"'-' 'mQie|rtlie«T;;£'class above the corporate- The week being suddenly at an end, and correct order without; haVlhif; Imi^iLfectMrbdr^tl^^ day-glow pansies finding myself in temporary possession of a the back of the book). totelly^Dniiiatipso' ithat^protifeirate t^ new amalgamated 400-page inter-library loan (due back), I long as you don't want to,take a;q^^^^ 'rno|isj[^osi0-^ and we developed such an decided to top up the old photocopy card & second glance atthe quail^ bf^ydur priiS^a^^^^ ail'f^th'tiiese sturdy old clunkers that reapply myself to the exquisite, , it slides out. Fuci S.^3JBwaros4pfAh'a f;'ani a»iipiSy^ .;Phdjtbcppylng;?|nPfQft*^^^^ piiiSdl m ^: -UQ 2i? union •M 9 9 0 9. A T I Enjoy Blowing »f i ; Smoke At People 1 tell you, as long as 1 live I'll never hypocritically represent one grouo while mouthful of cigarette smoke on stand-by understand why people get so upset about degrading the other? What's wrong, Ms. and then, when some uppity business a bit of nicotine smoke poweriully Patterson - afraid of offending the dominant woman in clean clothes walks by blast that permeating their head, hair and clothes. non-smoking majority by supporting a smoke into her Pantene-perfect hair! Stride The way most non-smokers act, you'd think minority group? Because even minority purposefully into your local McDonalds and that having to involuntarily inhale a cloudy groups have a voice, and if 1 choose to cough up as much nicotine onto the concoction of dangerous chemicals was chug away on a packet of cigarettes in the patron's food as you can. Blow onto like being force to swallow dog crap or comfort of a heavily-peopled, barely- sleeping hobos, shop assistants, and something. Well, I'm here to say sorry ventilated movie cinema, then that's my lollipop ladies. Trust me, it's the only way 'society', but 1 totally enjoy blowing smoke choice. people like us can be heard. I now realize at people! that I must be free to get my point across, The thing is, society is getting worse and anc if that includes absent-mindedly I mean, forgive me for speaking, but is this worse about it every day In the old days directing a gust of cigarette smoke into the a free society or isn't it? Is this a every man and his dog puffed away on a gurgling face of my six-month old son, then democracy? Because excuse me if i've cigar, pipe, or cigarette, and no one so be it. fallen asleep for the past few years and complained. All the Hollywood stars did it. missed the implementation of some But now, something so totalitarian regime that forbids choice and simple as eating in a liberty Excuse me if I somehow 'dreamed restaurant sees me re up' the whole post-Hitler democratic allocated to some dank, revolution, because for some bizarre small, non-smoking reason I was thinking that we were all living section. Is this smokist or in a society that promoted free expression. what? (Have you ever seen Stupid me! a "People Who Like Volleyball" section? Or a Some people like painting. Others like "Stupid People" section?) music, or football, or sewing. I happen to Any waiter who insists 1 go like blowing smoke into stranger's faces. Is off to smoke in some corner that so wrong? Of course not. But has like a leper gets exactly anyone ever tried to stop other people from what he or she desen/es: engaging in their hobbies? Exactly When it an eyeball-searing blast of comes to little old me, however, a hobby so tar, nicotine and carbon harmless as exhaling noxious gas into the monoxide to the face. unwitting faces of bystanders gets the big no-no. Life is so unfair. So what can we do about all this, my fellow smoke- Unfortunately, this double standard is blowers? Well, I think I have something that's relentlessly perpetuated the answer: blow that in the media. "Passive smoking kills." smoke at the public more "Don't smoke in restaurants or clubs while than ever before! We have other patrons are eating." And the Health a message to send and we Ministry is the worst of all. They campaign must be heard. Next time for the right of non-smokers, but what you're walking through the about the rights of smokers? Why so city make sure you keep a -UQ CL at £ 9 '£ 'D r '1 0 oi union 20 attain the desire to experience alcohol. used to cover a lack of confidence or to University often becomes a graduation of forget previous behaviour. Social Drinking the binge drinking school of thought with confidence wiil only emerge with actions the added legal freedom of turning that put you in control of a situation. Which eighteen. means you're not at the point of dancing on Games the table and propositioning the bouncer. Unlike other drugs alcohol has proven Don't stop drinking, by any means. Just health benefits when consumed in drink less, Karinya Louttit moderation and therefore suffers less 'You don't need alcohol to have fun' warnings. Smoking for example has no The reasons why adolescents drink alcohol pros despite Mr Mariboro's advice (he died vary in regards to class, wealth, family It's a favourite and often sarcastically of lung cancer) and current campaigns situations and coping strategies (Bellair spouted phrase among university students. highlight this. Alcohol warnings are more and Roscigno 2000). Various studies note Yet (purely from observation) it seems a lot difficult to convey and harder for the that it is not heavy users of alcohol that of us go through what could be termed the community to swallow. Of course we all cause high costs for the community but 'phases of drinking'. Similar to the phases rather moderate users who sustain long of the moon, it begins with consumption enjoy a brew, but how many times do you term health problems. Social skills are just levels starting at a silver, a couple of beers have one to many? Maybe once a month, one aspect of the yard glass that is binge a night. Slowly one becomes more greedy- according to the phases. In Ryan, Conway drinking one too many once too often, until and Fairbrother's self reported alcohol use drinking. So forget attaining that promo hat finally the phases compound with a huge questionnaire almost half of guys who drink by drinking yourself into oblivion. Don't night where you become so inebriated and a third of gals stated that binge imbibe to be cooler, you'll probably feel like you're being sick behind the barrier of the drinking was 'the norm' (1999). Though it a complete dag the next day. And if after Western freeway while a pumpkin-coloured may not be written on the bottle, and one last night's antics you can't face anyone- cab waits to whisk you home. drink won't kill you (or your baby), alcohol don't go hardcore drinking. A game of can still have a negative effect. monopoly with the olds can be a great There certainly exists a pattern of alcohol alternative. We have been warned against the 'peer consumption that usually ends with a vow pressure' motivations to drink alcohol and never to drink again, with the process References have seen the television advertisement of beginning again the following Friday the drunken giri having sex prematurely. Bellair, RE. & Roscigno, V.J. 2000, local afternoon at the Red Room. So why do we Once the teenage stage is over however, Labor- Market Opportunity and Adolescent drink so often and so much? consuming alcohol excessively- even once Delinquency', Social Forces, vol. 78, no. 4, It couid be the Aussie way - alcohol is in a while- is more likely to be about pp. 1509-1538. regarded as being culturally significant. depression than elation. It comes from a Lashbrook, J.T 2000, 'Fitting In: Exploring Certain types of alcohol denote special bad day at the burger shop or a bad the Emotional Dimension of Adolescent occasions; it is used as a social relaxant; assignment mark and though a drink helps Peer Pressure', Adolescence, vol. 35, no. and considered by some to be a social evil. you relax at first, it is this positive feeling 140, pp. 742-751. Everyone has found alcohol useful to aide that causes the body to urge you to drink more. Also ask yourself how you feel about in the completion of a pash 'n' dash at the Ryan, J., Conway R. & Fairbrother, G. local pub or a visit to the 'out laws'. your friends. If you're tired of being paid out 1999, 'Intox: an Innovative School- Based Particularly for adolescents alcohol is by a certain 'friend' getting smashed may Drug Education Intervention', Youth symbolic of adulthood and often be the perfect excuse to tell them how you Studies Australia, vol. 18, no. 1, pp. 23- 28. experimented with in order to test physical, really feel. Strong social skills have been found to prevent the need to drink to relax mental and often parental limits. Among Scheier, LM. & Botvin. G.J. 1998, (Lashbrook 2000). This sounds stupid adolescents alcohol is the most prevalent 'Relations of Social Skills, Personal because no one considers themselves drug used, the most likely to lead to illicit Competence and Adolescent Alcohol Use: social apes, and we all sit next to 'friends' drug use in later life and can retard the A Developmental, Exploratory Study', in lectures- even if they can't remember acquisition of social and cognitive skills Journal of Early Adolescence, vol. 18, no. your name. But seriously, by drinking (Scheier & Botvin 1999). But as a drug 1, pp.77-114. accepted socially culturally and legally it is excessively and embarrassing yourself a not difficult to imagine where adolescents pattern will emerge where alcohol is either -UQ ^0 union U 9 9 0 9 •A T" Keeping us down. Back in the 70s, those crazy days of peace, changing social environment this posed an Why is that the 7 and 9 networks choose to protests and wide spread youth political obvious threat to the status quo. screen these shows so late? Is it that they do activism, when uni in Australia was free and not value the late teen/20 something for all, the only assessment uni students were What a different situation it is today political demographic? Perhaps. Or is the reason subject to were final exams. Sure it was apathy at record highs and electoral enrolment behind these programming choices much necessary for students to draw on the entire among young people at all time lows. What more sinister? Is it that maybe television year's syllabus and have their final grade better way to silence the voice of youth than to isn't Ihe opiate of the masses as is so often totally dependent on one exam, which are bog us down with progressive assessment? claimed? Perhaps the greatest opiate of the definitely scary thoughts, but just imagine life With the constant shadow of assessment it is masses is sleep deprivation. With so many without progressive assessment. No mid or really little wonder that 'the youth ol today' great shows being on so late and so many end of semester exams, no weekly tutorial have such a weak political voice, pieces of assessment being due, it is a real papers or tute participation marks, no web wonder that uni students have any time to based discussion pages or quizzes and no Howeve' there exists another, perhaps more sleep. With the student masses being the research assignments or essays. Think of all covert, way to keep us down. One, which I most damaging to the status quo the higher the free time they had. Extra drinking time, must admit, is more effective on me than education powers along with Ker:^ Packer sure; extra time for experimentation, no doubt; constant assessment (uni/shmooni is all I and Kerry Stokes have conspired to keep us, extra time for political thought, definitely have to say). It is tho conspiracy to put great the students, behaving and conforming, by television drama shows on late at nighL screening great TV shows that appeal to our Those were the days, my friends/Tney Shows like Six Feet Under, The Sopranos, demographic, late at night and by dosing us thought they'd never end/They were young Buffy, Futurama, Curb Your Enthusiasm, up with constant assessment. With all the and sure to have their way The West Wing, all screened by Channels 7 sleep deprivation I would not be surprised if and 9 at 10.30pm on various nights of the energy drink manufacturers were also in on They were young, empowered, and sure that weeks and a particular favourite of mine the conspiracy to make sure we never they could and would change the world. Freaks and Geeks being shown at Sam by properiy rested. Sleep deprivation, not only What a frightening state of affairs for the Channel 9. Maybe you don't think these are is it recognized by Amnesty International as powers that be. Large groups of young particulariy great shows, but maybe you just a form of cruel and unusual punishment, it is people brought together everyday for go to bed too eariy to be able to get watch the opiate of the student masses. classes with so much free time on their them. Either way the fact is that- all these hands. Educated and encouraged to are shown in prime time in the US. challenge society's norms, in a rapidly Kirs ten Mort -UQ Ci 11 £ ^ 9 9: V 1 T' 1 0 li union u Hipster Freedom David Hill 1 always thought that the fashion industry was evil. How wrong could be? I see now that they have brought equality into the lives of young women, not known since the free and easy days of punks and hippies in the 1970's. That great Australian trademark, the "yobbo crack", "brickie's part" or "plumber's crack" is now not just the exclusive domain of the working class Aussie bloke. With the introduction of hipster jeans, tne female of our species can now elevate themselves to experience this fashion pinnacle, once only enjoyed by males. Yet again history has been made as women have claimed the right to expose the cleavage of their back bosoms in public, just as males have done for decades before them. First came women's right to vote eariy last century; then in the sixties came the abolition of the marriage ban that allowed employers to sack women once they were married; in the seventies the introduction of no fault divorce; and now, the final victory for the equality of women in Australian society as they expose the tops of their bottoms in shopping centres, class rooms, and restaurants everywhere. Of course, for men now there is the slight confusion and uneasiness of where to look when confmnted with a fellow student's hind-quarters, but this is a small price to pay for equality The fact that everywhere you look as you stroll innocently down the aisle to leave a tutorial, or right in front of you as you sit comfortably at the back of the lecture theatre, are exposed bottoms and panties, should not stop us from embracing this step fonward in social freedom. Women have the right to show off their crevices and curves just the same as men do, and if that means social discomfort and awkwardness, then so be it. So giris, if you catch someone looking at your "belt-line", or staring at that part that not even you get to see in private, take heart. Remember you are fighting for the rights of women everywhere. -UQ union n 9 9 0 9 A r don't sell well, we won't sell it for long. But new DVDs and new DVDs of old movies, apart from being a competitor for current Vm DVD KiU the books and books that couid possible be, are sold in and away from the usual entertainment retail sector. An electrical store will sell DVD players and thus DVD movies while a bookshelf seller won't Writer Star? sell books. Ikea doesn't sell DVDs, but music stores do, Simon Drake The greatest threat to the writer is that the DVD has gained greater access to the 'impulse-spender' or the 'gift-buyer'. To get a customer into a book store, they have to want to buy a book, or We are all consumers and we allocate a value to what we will wander in because they love reading. There, thanks to snazzy spend on entertainment. This value is dependant on a consumer's covers dictated by a publishing house marketing department, disposable income and their time available not working to enjoy intelligent reviews, reviews prepaid by interested parties, and the the fruits of their labor. The majority that earns nothing, who have last realm of consumer thought - word of mouth - books sell all the free time in the worid, hardly have all the more money in the themselves. But wander into a HiFi, Electronics, Music, Book, worid to lavish on this time. Games or any leisure store and the hapless consumer armed with a credit-card and an itch for retail therapy has to consciously fight Many of the millions of people ingrained in modern day slavery (9- off the 'DVD impulse buy', A DVD makes an easy gift. Here, have 5ers, I too am shackled) and it's cousin consumerism, prefer to 90 minutes of hyped movie, repackaged, and if you don't like it, it's spend their leisure money on the latest form of entertainment as a only 90 minutes you had to witness, rather than the 50 hours spent means of escapism. Thanks to technological advance, times have reading a book. changed and escapism in the new world can displace the escapisms of the old. By now you may be sitting straight, then slumping fon/vard, cringing at me. Why can't I just roll with the flows? Write for film! I I bring these assumptions to light because of one reason; as a have tried. I have been taken for rides by the glow of my praised self-published writer I v/ant more people to buy mere books, but film scripts and 'green light concepts' and seen how the same not just any book, real books that promote thought and excite our story fails to gain the momentum to impress those who have to imaginative lobes, rather than suppress thought with the come up with the production money reasons varying. From this I merriment of second-rate, mundane realms. have come to the conclision: It takes $10,000,000 to make a movie and as little as SI OCO to publish a book. And, when it comes For those who have decided to purchase to be entertained and to creative control, the author is it. They decide the story, the wander the contemporary marketplace there is an abundance of characters, the layers, the tone, the setting and the ending. The overpriced or bargain-binned products to spend their dollars on. Of author delivers uninterrupted thought crafted as a story. Their all the options, and there are mountains of crap on sale each and ability is judged not by physical pleasantries, the capacity to every day 1 see the DVD as potentia ly the greatest threat to the merchandise on their story, or if it reminds the audience of an hip-pocket that writers once had sole access to. existing anc branded story from three months ago. The author is 1 like the DVD. It's the logical byproduct of video content, the judged by their ability to communicate in a thousand different ways interactivity offered by computers, and the established and trusted the wetness of a first kiss or the dryness of paralytic vomiting. And CD format. With a DVD you can choose a different (though not what about the audience who has to endure the creations of any) language to accompany your home entertainment. A DVD is others? Is it not their choice to buy a DVD rather than a book? Is versatile and can be played on multiple platforms; laptops, it presumptuous to behave like government lawmakers and act in computers, cars, and, don't ask me why on huge refrigerators. In the righteous belief that people can't think for themselves? Or, is it time the shiny DVD will only become smaller in size, highly that the audiences' too easily perceived pitiful attention span is not portable, and soon replaced by bytes zapping through the air to to blame, but the writer in the modern age, unable to compete with your handheld screen. The initial attraction of the DVD was the the glow of the DVD? new options available for movie creators. Once, movies were released under the constraints of producers who wished to satisfy There lies the solution, if the DVD is posing a threat, and mind you the common-denominator audience with a one-size-fits-all movie. it's not the technology but rather the repackaging of the video of You liked it, hated it, and probable still paid for it, and then with the movie that was mass-marketed to death, it's up to writers to more and more movies hitting the market, you could decide who break through to their audience with a greater realm of escapism to pass your money on to. With a DVD, a director can release their that a movie studio, plastic characters and a special effects unit 'creative cut', delivering a much more personal experience. can create. Now that it's stated that writers shall write in pace with Viewing time can wane between 90 minutes of proven script the subliminal expectation of the audience , to keep the bargain, formula to 3 hours of roller-coaster film noir frolicking. As an it's also up to the audience to think before they buy. audience, we're closer to what the 'creatives' envisaged. The outcome is that the on-the-couch audience bored with common-denominator entertainment now sit up straight and take in the same entertainment, recycled, as a longer, hipper, and enhanced with surround-sound, DVD. What people do in their own living room is of no concern to me except that their hip- pockets and wallets create detriment for the other creators of worthy entertainment. A re-released Hollywood movie, written once by an author and then 'forumulised' by a script writer, filmed with a few brand-name stars to compliment the now mass-market storyline, plus the option of the director's 'visionary' ending, is selling as a DVD for $45. A good book, by an unknown author whispering for an audience from under a tonne of well branded authors and re-released 'classics', can't even make it to the shelf. The fiscal justification is sales. We are a sales driven society If it -UQ Ci 11 !E 9 •D 1 T' 1 0 ^W union ss difference. strap hooks. A puzzled look goes across his 10 things I hate face (Unlike the giri, his eyes are open. I notice a fellow Uni student. 1 can identify Apparently this means she's in love and he her as a Uni student from her Good News just wants sex. And yet he seems such a about teens R Rogers Week shirt. You see, she's old enough to caring, sensitive type as he fondles about) i should be over it by now. I'm a grown man. have actually seen Good News Week. 1 as he struggles to understand that he will Sort of. 20 years old. Old enough to drink, introduce myself. She's from OUT but today, have to pull the device tighter in order to eventually undo it, He looks at me with a even if 1 have to show two forms of ID because we two sworn enemies share a common I look about as old as my (ittle brother. And yet bond: The fight for aged rights. 1 strike up pleading look, as if to say "Can you help still I face my fear every afternoon and come conversation; me? You've done this before, what do I do? out of it a blubbering mess. Unfuri your wisdom". I think it's best if he 'These bloody teenagers! I saw some kids learns how to do this on his own. My lesson I start Uni at 4 on Mondays, hungover. I catch shoplifting the other day and they were just was that bus stops are not the best place to the bus at 3 and arrive at Indro bus station brazenly putting the stuff into their bags. In perform such complex operations. about half an hour later, And there I am my day we came up with a plan! We worked out where the security cameras were. We confronted with a seething ocean of hormones In front of me a giri in a tight shirt that reads took note of what time the security guards known as 'leenagers". They're everywhere. "Advice to giris: Don't wear tight shirts with changed over for lunch. Now they don't even Everywhere you look, their noise surrounds writing on them, they only give boys an care. They just walk in and steal." you. The hair wax dripping onto the payment. excuse to look at your breasts" The over-applied makeup keeping Revlon and demonstrates that she has studied the Dolly "It's no wonder they're stealing either. 1 tell Sarah Michelle Cellar in business. Ten Step Guide to Flirting all last night ya, the price of things these days! FORTY instead of her assignment. As she converses You try to get to the shopping plaza but it cents for a Macca's soft sen/el When I was a with the boy (who is indeed staring at her takes hours just pushing past these moody kid, the thirty cent soft serve was practically breasts), she flicks her hair, laughs at all his indignant creatures, I say creatures, an institution." jokes (have you noticed that teenagers' because they cannot possibly be human. As jokes are all South Park quotes? In my day it 'And the drinks they sell them! Whatever 1 ask politely if 1 can get through, one was Simpsons quotes), lightly touches his happened to a good ol cuppa coffee when manages to distract herself from her all- elbow, and even remembers to cock her you're tired? Now they have these Red Bull important discussion of Big Brother just long head to one side. and Red Eye drinks. Next thing you know enough to pass me a cursory glance and they'll be putting ecstasy and speed in the move in far enough so that there's room for "Ahh isn't it wonderful to be young and in softdrinks. Amphetamines free with your Calista Flockhart to narrowly squeeze love" my QUT friend remarks, looking at purchase of a Kermit the Frog doll!" through. them. "But they don't even have The Muppets on "Oops sorry" I say as my bag full of textbooks Excuse me while I vomit. These kids know telly anymore! No wonder the worid's in such on Ancient Greece smacks some young girl I as much about love as I do about a state, kids aren't even getting a proper hadn't seen in the head. Sorry indeed. astrophysics. I smile politely in agreement childhood without Kermie and Miss Piggy with the freak from QUT The noise is so loud my ears are ringing. What kind of a society are we living in when The squeaks of voices breaking, modulating kids don't grow up on the Muppets?" Behind me a giri with one breast the size of from the range of a soprano down to that of a watermelon and the other the size of a pea "Speaking of television, the other day I told a baritone and bouncing back up and down struggles to pull down her singlet top over my younger brother I was going off to the as they talk. The whiney screech of young her belly button. Apparently she hadn't bank. And he asked me "which bank?". So of giris bitching about their bestest friends. As realised when she got dressed this morning course I replied "No not Commonwealth, I'm 1 breathe in, the air is thick with testosterone that her midriff top would reveal so much going to Westpac". He looked at me like I and hormones that choke me. Pimples pop skin. (You mean a midriff top bares your was from Mars. I had to explain to him it was open and splatter all over my face. midriff!?). Her jeans are so low that 1 wonder this ad that used to be on telly years ago and why she even bothered. I'm sure if she I overhear a conversation about Seinfeld last It had..." hadn't she'd probably be a lot more popular. night 'And their music! Absolute nonsense lyrics, Eventually it takes so long trying to get to the "That was so funny with Kramer's bro!" in our day lyrics mieant something! 1 mean plaza that I have missed my lecture and take Delta Goodrem: Born to Try? Most of have to go home. I decide to write it all down "Oh yeah that was a great episode" I turn these kids seem to be born to bludge off! for Semper. around and interiect. "I remember it well. Whatever happened to working at Uni? One of my favourite episodes. I remember As I sit here at my computer the effects of when it first came on the telly about 7 years "I know! In my first year at Uni, tutes ended ageing are showing. I can slowly feel the ago, I'd have been about 15, it's still just as 5 minutes before the end. Then last year it wrinkles crawl across my face. Deep classic today", 1 happily tell them. became 10 minutes. This week I had a tute crevices form upon my forehead. The curve finish a full quarter of an hour early! And no in my back slowly forms a hump. The colour I realise that 1 would have been their age one does the readings so you can't get any drains from my hair and falls in a brown when that episode was new. One bright benefit from tutes. Honestly 1 don't know why puddle on the floor. My teeth turn a skanky spark asks me if I have left my walking I even botheri" yellow and pitter patter as they drop out of stick at home. One giri wearing a World my mouth onto the desk. The lenses of my Vision shirt kindly offers to help me across "Terrible" glasses are g|^ the street. She looks barely old enough to "Terrible" thicker than perform the task herself without holding George Bush. her Mummy's hand. I'm rather uncomfortable sitting on this bench because I'm squashed in by two Yes, I have to I escape to another part of the crowd where I young people who are conducting an face it I'm an old might go unnoticed. Yes, blending into the experiment to see how far they can stick bastard. And to crowd. Remember when that was all you their tongues down each other's throats be honest I'm wanted to do. Yet at the same time you without depriving the other of breath. The getting rather desperately wanted to be noticed and to be boy is trying to get his first grope and is tired. It's different. The age when you followed all the fumbling around under her jumper trying to already 7:30pm, fashions of people who proclaimed their comprehend the complex design of the bra What a day! -UQ S4 union n 9 9 0 9 A r I Have A Complete And Total Lack Of Interest In You Hey how's it going, Colin? Good? Oh, that's nice. Well - to be honest, I don't give a shit really As a matter of fact of all the people in my large circle of acquaintances, you're the one I give the least shit about. Come to think of it, I V have a complete and total lack of interest in you. It's not that 1 find you unbearable or even mildly annoying. As a matter of fact, when I look over at your familiar yet unexciting face I can't even muster up a vague fee'ing of dislike or like. When we all get together for some social event £ -X, like this, it's all I can do to muster the strength to look in your direction and throw out some kind of stilted, superficial banter just so the rest of our friends don't realize how little 1 care about you. Apparently 1 met you back at Jason's Christmas party in 1999, or at least that's what Jason tells me. I can't really remember being there at all, so I'm sure that that party conversation, like most of our communications, must have been a complete ripper. Let me see - Colin, Colin... I have a vague memory of the person who was Susan's date at Jason's wedding ^ that might have been you. I remember an indistinct, faded person who didn't interest me in the slightest, and since I take an active interest in nost people I meet I assume this must have been you. It's not that I disdain your personality your looks, your oeliefs, or anything about you really - actually I can't quite put my finger on my total inability to recognize you as a person. I guess it's just that, well, if I had to line up thirty or so of rny acquaintances, and maybe even threw in twenty or so people from off the street, you'd be the last person I'd choose to voluntarily engage with. Seeing that our conversations spanning over several social events amount to no more than one hundred words, I'm guessing that the feeling (or lack of it) is mutual. It's taken me about four years to even notice that our connection is non-existent, :..j^j not that I really care. But, hey look, I'm sure you're a nice person and all. It's just that when I think about you, the chemistry is just not there. But don't worry. Next time we're standing next to each other at some future party I'll make some lame joke about the hors de oeuvres or something, just so we can get the necessary chit-chat out of the way Drug and alcohol use by young people is We are currently seeking energetic as all training will be provided free of on the increase with more and more individuals to be part of a team of charge by Australian Red Cross. designer drugs hitting the market. volunteers aged 18-25 years to deliver According to DRUG ARM, illicit drug abuse drug and alcohol awareness and teach Benefits of becoming a Save A Mate Peer accounts for 34 percent of deaths in the 15 young people how to administer Expired Trainer include accredited training, - 34-age groupr At-any-given-tirae-1-6,-900. . Air-Resuscitation _{EAB) _and_ Cardlo delivering the program to diverse groups of Australians are receiving services for drug Pulmonary . Resuscitation (CPR) in "young" people,""public speaking skills, and alcohol abuse. Many young people substance related emergencies. All training leadership skills, first aid training and the experiment with drugs and nothing goes sessions are conducted in High Schools chance to really make a difference and wrong, but what happens when it does go and Youth Venues. save lives. wrong? Would you know what to do if At this time of the year, when university someone overdosed? The program isn't a miracle solution for drug use, but it does involve young people and high school exams loom and the i upcoming party season tempts, the Save A Mate is an Australian Red Cross reaching out to other young people to potential for stress and increased drug use community health, peer education service provide practical information and skills that is high for all young people. that addresses the consequences of drug make a difference. Save A Mate is a great and alcohol use by young people, program, but it doesn't work without dedicated volunteers lo train young people. To become part of the Save A Mate concentrating primarily on drug overdose program or to find out more about being a and strategies to address this life- You do not need to have a training or first Peer Trainer, please contact the SAM threatening occurrence. aid background to become a Peer Trainer, Coordinator on 1300 55 44 19 or email [email protected] •UQ Ci 11 £ '£ 9 '£ 'D •1 0 li :i.^ PET SHOP BOYS: Some Heartaches You Just Can't Dance Away Donovan Ellem In the late-eighties and early-nineties the agrees that this most basic human urge is a effects everybody regardless of either race, British pop duo Pet Shop Boys were worthy subject for pop music: 'Possessions colour, creed. Sexual desire and moreover metaphorically speaking an island of reality are meaningless, love is everything, and the longing to be adored and loved, are in an ocean of diarrhoea. From the outset, it every one in the worid has the same amongst the greatest urges humans was obvious there was something that aspirations - It doesn't really matter who experience. Although with trademark distinguished Pet Shop Boys from the they are, every one wants love, to have a ubiquitous irony, Tennant later claimed that plethora of other teen bands. Indeed, Pet sense of security at the same time as to be the lyrics of Heart were 'quite corny'. Shop boys is a 'pop group' that not only has loved'. danceable music and a unique image; but As Heath points out, people who make and also, their lyrics set them apart from the However Pet Shop Boys in most cases write listen to dance music understand that 'the 'banal tripe' that usually accompanies pop intelligent love songs, self-pitying, most rigid rhythms offer the widest, freest music. sometimes with a hint of irony or sarcasm. backdrop for extreme emotion'. The Their intensely romantic Love come quickly feelings accompanying meeting someone While, like most pop music, love and sex about the overwhelming emotions that with whom you can feel totally amazed to be permeates much of the Pet Shop Boys' accompany the inevitable and unstoppable with, or the first kiss or embrace with music, the themes Pet Shop Boys deal with nature of love that eventually finds everyone, someone who you know will change your are many and varied. Unlike most 'teen is a positively optimistic song, yet Pet Shop life, is an intense experience that only the bands' both Neil Tennant and Chris Lowe Boys ironically make it sound sad. Yet emotional intensity of music can make were university educated, Tennant having Always on my mind, with depressively sad tangible, but not quite. A good taken a degree majoring in history, and Lowe lyrics, sounds inspirationally happy as does pop/dance/disco record is, as Frith points studying architecture. They were also more the cover version they did with Liza Minnelli, out, 'the sound of the unobtainable, time mature than most pop artists, Losing my mind. Both demonstrate the turned back on itself in an eternal loop'. A Stock/AitkenA/Vaterman's Pete Waterman contradictory nature of love, what the Pet good pop record makes one feel that they said once that: 'if a giri's got blue eyes, sing Shop Boys call the double-edged sword. are in perfect love, that one has somehow about that, not her polities'. Tennant on the Lowe admits, and Tennant agrees that 'The attained the unobtainable, an evertasting other hand believes you should sing about worst thing about love is when you're in it'. love, yet like most love if must come to an both. Tennant explains that 'when people As Heath notes 'it's a far more realistic end, and usually a pop song lasts only three say disco music has crap lyrics....it does. reflection of how life is lived - you dance to and a half minutes, and then the passion and But rock music has crap lyrics, and the idea shake off sadness, and you wallow when joy is gone. Heart is an unusually happy of the PSB was to have disco music with your happy because wallowing is one of the love song. Usually the Pet Shop Boys love introspective lyrics, political lyrics' - thinking luxuries happiness allows'. songs are utteriy depressive. persons pop. Nevertheless Pet Shop Boys have released The link between sex and money love and But then again, what is wrong with 'banal' songs about love that lyrically border on the materialism, is a common Pet Shop Boys' lyrics in pop music anyway? This is a banal. PSB single Heart, with the lyrics theme, which is epitomised in their electro- question Tennant/Lowe have mused over for Every time 1 see you/Something happens to ballad Rent, Rent also deals with many years. Love is of course the subject for me/Like a chain reaction/Between you and compromise in relationships an issue an overwhelming number of pop songs, yet me/My Heart starts missing a beat/My heart Tennant addressed while talking about Why in many case the lyrics are banal, yet love is starts missing a beat/Every time, was don't we live together: 'If you will never find the most inexplicable concept criticised for its apparent banality. Indeed someone who you are totally in love with, overwhelming and indefinable. Pet Shop the lyrics are, like many love songs banal, who you are intellectually compatible with, Boys have addressed this issue on but as Tennant notes they are totally sincere. physically compatible with, never going to numerous occasions, and have admitted When one is in love, it all can become get bored with sexually is incredibly good that one of their favourite records is Kylie incomprehensible - with questions such as: looking - if your not going to find that person Minogue's I should be so lucky. In an why do I feel like this?; why do I, with then your probably going to settle for the interview Lowe, declaring his love of the absolutely unlimited subjective emotional person who you're use to'. Being in a song said... 'I like the bit where she goes "I- confidence (coupled with a total lack of relationship and/or deciding to live/stay with l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l-l should be so lucky" and 1 just rational objectivity), adore this person so someone who is not an ideal partner, but love the line "I should be so lucky lucky much?; why can 1 not control such all- better than nothing, is fully epitomised in lucky lucky". If that's banal, it's a strength. embracing emotions? Therefore it is hardly numerous Pet Shop Boys' songs, It's just a mark of pure genius.'. Tennant surprising it dominates pop lyrics. After all It demonstrating that they recognise that -UQ .-!t^ 9. union !M 9 9 0 9 A T' falling for the wrong person for the wrong was genuine. Even though they may be in a reasons, and staying with them while semi-permanent, permanent or de facto The Axe knowing this, deprives many of finding their relationship, these superficially 'attractive' perfect love. The 'it may not be perfect but yet essentially 'shallow' people it's not that bad', better the devil you know, narcisststically flirt with, tease and court even if the other devil is better, scenario - of other people, for personal aggrandisement, The steel blade remaining in such doomed relationship - or as some sort of game. In the middle of and the pain such a situation causes to all the song Tennant poses the rhetorical cut deep into the wood parties involved is the subject of numerous question to such people: Do you play to Pet Shop Boys' songs. win/Or are you just a bad loser? People so watched by insecure about themselves, or their current Compromise, the tragedy of staying or living relationship, that they feel the need to make pensive ravens with someone for personal convenience still more people desire them, and in turn and security (rather than for love), and the make others emotionally suffer, is the perched high self-destructive consequences of concept developed in both the song and the continuing such a facade in the absence of accompanying promotional video of on leafless branches true love, is explored in other Pet Shop Domino dancing. The ultimately self- Boys' records such as So sorry, I said, destructive nature of such behaviour is under which Jealousy, 1 don't know what you want but I poignantly illustrated at the end of the I laboured can't give it any more and So hard. For Pet promo video, when the girt who has courted Shop Boys deciding to live with someone, and then rejected numerous men, ends up burdened by the thoughts which is an extremely serious decision, on a alone, walking through a deserted whim - flippantly - for reasons of graveyard, crying, with her head buried in a of motorbike repairs circumstance and convenience rather than bunch of flowers. Not only has she hurt the true love, is a recipe for personal and person/s who believed her attention was and a girlfriend's emotional disaster. Most people decide to genuine, furthermore her promiscuous and live together for the wrong reasons. The deceitful behaviour has ultimately promise of a good time. giddy excitement, that accompanies the destroyed any meaningful relationship she early stages of any relationships, fosters the had with either her partner or the people false ideal that being constantly together, or she has manipulated. moreover, believing that such a situation will While Raul, the farmhand, some how 'consummate' or 'justify' the Pet Shop Boys also deal with people being relationship (which in most cases is discreet and secretive about personal cursed the monotony superficial and shallow), precipitates many sexual relationships (In Private and couples deciding to co-habitat. Not Confidential), sexual attraction (We all feel of rye bread or surprisingly most such affairs end in utter better in the dark) and rejection (What have and complete failure, pain and heartache I done to desen/e this?) and about the pain the empty tobacco pouch for both parties. But as Tennant sung: and emotional distress of being stood up by Everybody's got to live together/Just to find someone you adore and love (That's my claiming he'd be better off a little piece of mind. The self-realisation of impression). In fact, the desperation and being in such a situation and the desire to paranoia of unrequited love is a recurring dead and buried. escape such an unfuifilling circumstance, Pet Shop Boys' theme - the desire to be which surely causes the end of many loved by someone who is oblivious to your relationships, is vividly portrayed in feelings, being in love with someone who is Thus he went numerous Pet Shop Boys video clips, by not in love with you, loving someone who is women leaving their partners for other men with someone else and loving someone reciting his discontent (Jealousy, Rent, So hard and Heart). more than they love you - reflected in songs such as One in a million. To face the until I seized him by the collar The song Domino dancing deals with the truth, For your own good. One more dilemma of loving someone who is so chance, etc. - and the pain such perception and shoved his thin neck 'incredibly good looking' that it is impossible of deception facilitates, runs throughout to trust them. People who literally have many Pet Shop Boys' songs. on the chopping log. people falling at their feet like Dominoes, and consciously use their obvious sexual It seems that all the Pet Shop Boys But he wriggled free attraction and beauty to manipulate others theorising and postulating of the nature of and achieve their goals, and the pain this love leads one to the same conclusion, and ran to the village causes, not only to their partners (who they which is epitomised in their song titled • are ostensibly meant to be in love with), but Love is a catastrophe, screaming like a chicken. to people who initially thought their attention -UQ a, 11 9 9 'D 1 0 oi union :./ ODE To A GRECIAN URN ANDREW TURNER Immortal Age beside immortal youth and ail I was in asha Tlthonus -Alfred, Lord Tennyson MICHAEL Gow has been artistic director of this very-suitable shell of a venue. The I don't wish to overstate the point nor am the QTC for over 4 years now. In this time he Brisbane Powerhouse is the setting for a proposing that Brisbane can sit with Rome, has transformed a tired and staid pro- conventional head spliced with a radical and Glasgow and Shanghai as a metropolis that establishment organisation with a provoking pulsating heart. There is an uneasy mood sets the agenda. But we proud Brisbanites intensity By ensunng an approachable and that's distrustful and suspicious. The ability to have a raw paradox - an elixir as strong as energetic repertoire, he has made the theatre be arrested and enraptured for two hours is a the sweat in the February humidity At least a magical hall-of-mirrors once more and has testimony to the fonvard thinking, progressive allow me to say the few of us privileged continually contributed to the cultural agenda. focus of this company enough to gain an exposure to tertiary education. We can dabble in theatrical worlds This achievement cannot be understated. Because, as a 23 year old boy I have the while laughing self-sufficiently about at the Brisbane has a reputation as culturally AWOL- attention span of a fruit fly interstate aspirational trash at Bryon or where HULK by Ang Lee is allegedly highbrow. Noosa, Coupled with the myriad of stimuli that we are MICHAEL has established an international bombarded with, makes the challenge of reputation for Australian drama, especially The paradox is we can laugh at the getting bums on seats a challenge by anyone's with his works. Away Sweet Phoebe and contestants on the Block, while dreaming of estimation. Consider the range of Europe. Indeed, it seems these works are being one. Scharnefrauer allows us to seethe entertainment opportunities we have- pay-TV, perennial staples in the Australian theatrical with envy at 2C-year olds who have bigger downloading a film via broadband and the cannon. Every year sees at least two and firmer breasts/ pecs /delete where accessibility and acceptance of DVD productions of Away with an earlier one at applicable, but at the same time wanting to be technology just to name a few. Sydney's avente guard Malthouse last month. them, or have sex with them. We are the This is why Michael's work are so popular, generation Y, or the post-structural generation Admittedly our 14-25 demographic is the they lend themselves to a varied generation. We are highly intelligent, erudite quickest to take up new technologies. interpretation, but never fail to touch a raw and learned but find any one deliberately Conversely this demographic is the most nerve with the collective Australian educating us smacking of trying too hard. I skeptical to submit to traditional mediums of expenence. Audiences love the melody that have grown up vyith Homer Simpson playing a entertainment, especially opera, classical infuses from the stage with his eariier pieces. more legitimate father in my life since I started music and theatre. And establishment watching it on the ten network in 1991. What theatre throughout history has always been I must confess that I was first introduced to kind of audience are we? aligned with tertiary educated and affluent Gow's iconic piece Away while studying it in bourgeoisie left-leaning professionals. So, in year 11 and didn't really get the point of it. It PHEDRA hand;es the universality of the Brisbane, you can appreciate how small the meandered and I thought it was a convoluted human condition with a precision and finesse. QTC's target audience is. and unnecessarily artsy wank. It was not until Recall Oedipus, where the insurmountably of I saw it performed by La Boite that the raw our decisions blinds us, both methophncally However, 1 commend the Gow in his choice of intensity of the Australianess (although I hate and literally in Oedipus' case, to our potential. the 2003 subscription season. The current the Dead White Male-ness that word inspires) Racine's drama is of passion overpowering performance is a neo-classical Phreadra it's that really brought a solitary to the audience's reason. Recall Dostoevsky where the as relevant and stinging as it was five- collective experience. overwhelming evil of Raskolnikov can only be thousand years ago in classic Athens. I repressed but never exhausted. These texts commend you to the Bnsbane Powerhouse to And while Michael is a respected operatic are humid and oppressive meditation of the expose yourself, challenge yourself and and theatrical director, he has found fragility of the human condition. Like a hall of lubricate your mind against the saccharine establishing himself free from the mirrors, it distorts and amplifies our trash that is available through most dull and connotations of his eariier work to be vulnerabilities. Like a mad-hatter's tea party pointless pursuits. onerous. Does he want to be free from the it laughs at our shackles of his eariier reputation? I suppose insecunties with an Classic 'golden-age' Greek tragedy has an the contradiction with any artist is their embittered unique rhythm that is not by any definition obligation to push ahead into unprecedented pleasure. strained or foreign. It's locus in the roots of territory without becoming comfortable by resting on the laurels of the awards and the our Western civilisation and deals with the Racine's Phedra, pnce of flesh. The task is to be fresh and crisp most extreme personifications of eternal directed by Michael but to remember the grit, the passion and the struggles against passion and the evils of Gow is playing at In this play death and love is the humility of the bad coffee and cigarettes that narcissism. the Brisbane breathe of life. And anger, hatred, envy flows line any inception. Powerhouse from through their blood like a dangerous, the 15th unspoken poison. Michael was offered the not-so-approachable September to 11th audience of Brisbane in 1999. Brisbane is An ideal two hour traffic of the stage. October. where the national party reigned forever it Gow is the director of this seminal piece. He seems and is as conservative as it comes. If you're 24 years What has transpired in the past five years is a has uploaded the sombre mood to the age of of age or under, phoenix arising from the ashes. Brisbane has acid jazz and heavy shiraz. An eternal clash you can attend the gone through an internationalisation. between pungent black and metallic platinum. performance for The tension is palpable and resonates across only $17. -UQ ' union n 9 9 0 9 A T' Michael: Storyboard your film and budget Hon-or film, buff Leon 'Braindead' Calcutt it out realistically trecently caught up with three fellow zombie Peter: My advice is spend time on the fans: Michael and Peter Spierig, directors of script. Really assess it. Is this up to the award winning film 'Undead'; and actor scratch? Is this offering something new and Mungo McKay, who plays zombie slayer ^ different that nobody has done before? I'm Marion in the film, •t not talking about special effects. I'm Leon: 'Undead' was awesome. So J talking about a unique idea. If you have where did you get the idea, and what " that, your movie won't blend in. It will motivated you-to make it into a feature have its own place. You really have to film? ' ^ break the moqld, and be brutally honest with yourself. If'your stuff is MJchajBl: Well, back in 94/95 Peter stock-standard shit, start again. and I had a lot of fun making a trilogy • of short horror films. We've made iK Leon: What do you think of,the state other shoi:1 films in different genres \ of ^recent horror movies? Do ^ you but we kept coming back to the idea think there's a lack of originality? of a zombie film. We thought it would be a really fun, great way to start our Peter: There's kind of this new feature film 'Career, hopefully We resurgence in horror at the moment, looked at filmmakers we admire, like ^PI , Every.studio in Hollywood wants to do Peter Jackson and George Romero, and < horror, and the horror coming out of saw where their careers started - with low Hollywood is pretty bad. It has been crap budget horror films. . • for a long time, with the exception of a handful like 'The Ring' and 'Scream'. I think Mungo: Glad you liked the film. It's funny;, the real quality resurgence in horror right 1 vvas never a fan of, horror movies. They now is the independeht Viorror film. Movies always scared me.' • ' anpusing. r , ' like 'Cabin Fever'.' 'Dog Soldiers'. 'Cube'. 1 just can't take ' ' even '28 Days Later' which i^ not really Leon: Really? So how did you get the part zombies seriously. Any slow creature independent but has a relatively low of Marion? walking around trying to eat .someone's budget. Really great stuff. brains is very amusing. Mungo: I've been at the Actors Workshop Leon: Every good horror movie needs a for neariy eight years, teaching and training Peter: We sort of look at il like a kick-arse weapon. Whose idea was the as a professional actor. The role came up Roadrunner cartoon. It's so exaggerated triple barreled shotgun? so I went for it. It's a great role. Also, I didn't and unrealistic, you can't take it seriously. have to shave (laughs). I could grow my Michael: I believe it was my idea. I beard (and) that was a big factor. Leon: So what's it like promoting a movie honestly can't remember. But you need you filmed two years ago? Do you keep in more than just a pistol, or a shotgun to blow Leon: Michael and Peter, when did you touch with each other? zombie apart. You're right; every great first become fans of zombie films? It horror movie has an iconic weapon. Ash started for me when 1 was young, my old Mungo: Oh yeah, we're all Brisbanites. We ('Evil Dead') has his chainsaw; Freddy man showed them to me. hang out, see films. I love Bnsbane. I know (Kruger) has his glove. I may have to live out of a suitcase in Peter: I think it was back in the early BOs future, but Brisbane is my base. I've lived Leon: So what are you working on at the when Evil Dead came out on video. 1 saw it here all my life. moment? and it scared the shit out of me. As a young kid it left a lasting impression. Leon: Your mug's al! over the place these Mungo: Nothing at the moment. It's days, Mungo. difficult; I'm at the stage where I have to be Leon: So do you think there's a resurgence really choosy. I'm waiting for an interesting of zombie mpvies? Mungo: I'rii a famous anonymous! My offer I might have to go overseas. A weird beard and hat completely obscure my face. thing about acting is you have to travel Peter: Absolutely there is now. At the time overseas and work overseas, for some were no zombie films ouL We thought They v/ budget. How did you do that? screens in (around) 22 countries, so there s maybe we could start the resurgence. But bound to be work generated as a result. I now 'Undead' is out, and there have been Peter: We did a large chunk of it ourselves. heaps of zombie films out lately It's great That cut costs dramatically Obviously we really are not charging our own company for the Written by Leon 'Braindead' Leon: I like it that 'Undead' is horror and effects we create. We tned to plan as much comedy combined. as possible and shoot very carefully so we Calcutt and Tara Tiiorne. didn't waste time or film stock. Michael: We just think of the sickest possible thing we can. and it always seems Leon: Any advice for people who want to funny. The violence I write is always make a movie, but don't have huge funds? Where would you start? -UQ a 11 9 9) 'f 1 0 fi union S9 rONI COliHTE APANES E STOn Japanese Story 24 Hour Party People Celebrating the release of the new Lara Croft Tomb Raider: The Australian film shot in the Pilbara Thanks to the wonderful bunch Cradle of Life region of WA and starring Toni @ The AV, Channel we have 5 Collette. We have 20 double passes to Thanks to the busty burley bunch give away, with thanks to the copies of this wonderful DVDs to @ UIP we have 10 double passes to giveaway to lucky Semper wonderful bunch @ Think Tank Angelina Jolies new flick. Ph the Communications.. readers. All you have to do is Semper office: on 33772237 before All you have to do is phone the ring into the Semper office on October 8. Semper office on 33772237 before 33772237 before October 8. Octobers. -UQ 41.1 union U 9 9 0 9 A r THANKS TO THE ORGANISERS OF LIVID WE HAVE ONE DOUBLE PASS TO THIS WONDERFUL CONCERTTO GIVE AWAY ! ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS SEND US AN EMAIL TELLING US WHAT YOU WOULD DO TO GET NOTICED BY ANYONE OF THE BANDS PLAYING ©LIVID. EMAIL:[email protected] BEFORE OCTOBER 15 SPM. GOODLUCK!!!! JUDGES WILL PICK THE BEST ENTRY JUDGES DECISION IS FINAL. AND NO CORRESPONDENCE WILL BE ENTERED INTO. UNDERWORLD Thanks to the lovely bunch @ Columbia Tristar flicks we have 20 double passes to the preview of Underworld on Wednesday October 15, 6.30pm at Birch Carroll & Coyle Chermside. If you'd like to win all you have to do is contact the Semper office on 33772237 before Spm October 15. .UQ (i, 'll IE £ 'R Tl 0 tf union 41 AMICHAHWiNJfRBOUOM^I music video, theatrical instrumental and filled with Racecourse', with its evoking lugubrious trailer exclusive interviews impossibly cool laid back oblique lyrics and unique desperation through a filter and more. It's well worth beats, some bass grooves, structure, brings to mind of detached cool, apparent the purchase to discover ambient noises and a fair Pavement, if Pavement in the five-minutes-from the truth behind Factory bit of jazz blown over the went hi-fi and made use of suicide feel of 'Meet Me at Records. top. The album is quite an uplifting harmonies. the Bottom'. Ultimately eclectic affair, which hints Lovers does not always Longwave are restrained Sofia Ham at acts like St Germaine live up to its grandiose by their influences; UIUII ('Walking Like a Peari, ambitions, however. 'Fill however they certainly 24 Hour Party People Grand Drive Lefthander') and 'Felt Me With Apples' is an don't lack ambition or Mountain' Goldfrapp (Av Channel/ Self-titled) inferior reproduction of OK potential. Madmanrrhe Film (RCA Victor/BMG) ('Nor'easter). There's even Computer's 'Fitter Consortium) a touch of Miles Davis on Happier', and the child- Jeremy Day Hailing from the UK, Grand 'Lowslung'. A very sung 'Morning Bird' can be "I just saw god" (Tony Drive are perhaps the interesting collection of a little annoying. However Sides' Wilson)"What'd he look great-lost connection tunes here. these slight failings only Full Fathom Five like?"He was the exact between the 70s and serve to illuminate the (Valve) image of me."Above is a modern music. This latest David Tam diversity and genius of the conversation between album is a compilation of rest of the album. Anyway Brisbane's Full Fathom Tony Wilson and the some of their earlier works, how many psychedelic Five have with their second Happy Mondays; taken designed to introduce local classics are perfect? full-length album managed from the wonderful, no (!), audiences to the band, to seamlessly fuse bloody brilliant movie 24 though you'd never know it Jeremy Day electronics and organics. Hour Part People. Tony the way the tracks come Electronic synths are Wilson was Factory together The Grand Drive jn fhvt^f- heavily present throughout Records founder- the label H sound is one which takes but are complemented to behind Joy Division (who ^^^^^ its roots from country (but ^iHe^^^SJ great effect by a variety of later went on to become the good kind of alt-country live instruments including New Order) and the Happy rather than the hat-brigade guitars, piano, glockenspiel Mondays. Not only this, he crap more usually 'Lovers' and banjo.The songs also transformed associated with the style) The Sleepy Jackson themselves move along Manchester into the place and 70s Americana. (EMI) ^^^ effortlessly on rhythms that to be with the introduction Opening tune 'Firefly' is seem too perfect to be of the first ever 'raves' at stunning, with a light swing The debut album from devised by mere humans. his super club the to it and lyrics as poetic as Perth outfit the Sleepy The Strangest Things' Album opener and first Jackson has all the Hacienda. As legend has it, any by Dylan, whilst Longwave single 'Built You A Gun' hallmarks of a psychedelic he was inspired by the Sex 'Sleepy' could easily work (RCA/BMG) glides into the ears with a classic. In Luke Steele it Pistols first Manchester gig in the romantic prom-slow hypnotic rhythm and boasts an eccentric front and decide to build a dance scene of a movie Alongside fellow NYC magnetic vocal man with an musical empire with the with its gentle keyboards inhabitants Interpol, performance. The title anarchic business and hooky chorus, embarrassment of ideas Longwave trade primarily track borrows the robotic and assorted pretty colours philosophy of: no reminiscent of the Eagles, in gloomy melodies and pulse of Kraftwerk, while floating around inside his contracts, no ownership - Brilliant, nostalgic tunes to reverb-heavy guitar 'The Sea' features ethereal head (think Syd Barrett or just passion, music and prove that they still do latticework. The songs on vocals that fade in and out Brian Wilson). The album hedonism. And if the band make 'em like that they their second longplayer of elegant string is full of the sun-drenched didn't like it- they were able used to. The Strangest Things are arrangements. Eerie melodies and general to leave. A funny and majestic in scope, with melodies, dub effects, and weirdness of the Flaming poignant look at how the DavJd Tam ghostly atmospherics powerful driving basslines Lips or the Beatles circa UK dance culture began provided by producer Dave abound. Full Fathom Five told from the focus of the the White Album. There is Johnny Conquest Fridmann (Flaming Lips, have dared to explore the man many calls a genius, a also layer upon layer of Mercury Rev). The band outer reaches of sound, twat and a poet. Steven 'Uptown for the bizarre sounds and effects, Americas' reveal themselves to be with great success. Coogan seems destined to with everything from viola, (SirkusA^alve) keen students of keyboards, turntables and play this part; immersing Television, constructing Jeremy Day fiddle contributing to the himself in the outspoken With members from the towering guitar edifices, mayhem, as well as some Wilson whose life it seems Tomato multimedia team, only to smash them apart 'Send' tasty George Harrison- is completely in his control, it's no surprise that Johnny with distortion and Wire style slide guitar, 'Good but at the same time; oul of Conquest's album feedback. These seismic (Valve) Dancers' and 'This Day' his hands. With 2 DVDs originally came about when shifts unfold above a solid This latest release by art- are technicolour anthems, with fantastic bonus they felt some original rhythm of prominent punk legends Wire is the while 'Old Dirt Farmer' digs material including audio music was required to basslines and thumping first full-length album of up gold in the form of a new material from the band commentaries from Tony accompany their video Jesus and Mary Chain- lively country ditty The since their 1999 Wilson, 24 deleted scenes, work. 'Uptown for the style drums, Frontman single 'Vampire reformation. Send is a dark New Order 'Here to Stay' Americas' is totally Steve Schiltz is adept at album, even by Wire's -UQ union !M 9 9 0 9 A 7" The songs need the shiny a grain of salt. I just felt eariy days which, I am told, normally bleak standards. treatment, but they don't that this album needed were the heady days of deserve it: they are devoid Desman to truly go to 1989! The album is a It possesses a tightly Defcon 1 and explode with wound ferocity forcing you of hooks, despite being double cd set of singles saturated in annoyingly whatever he had, cannons at gunpoint through dark akimbo, instead of and b-sides as well as a and sinister corridors of overbeanng nasal series of rarities and melodies. The overall wimping his way through menacing electronics and his ballads with a love of unreleased tracks from the industrial-strength guitar impression is of a band his own image which last decade. As is typical fuzz. 'You Can't Leave content to take their glistens throuqh on every with an album of immediate musical Now' is akin to an track. Now don't get me unreleased classics, the influences and fashion Orwellian policeman who Chappelf wrong, I love a ballad as value of each track as a breaks your spirit armed them into a re-usable "just much as (insert your A truly tripped-out classic is not abundantly only with repetition and a add guitar-bass-drums & preferred archetype of conception of a twisted clear on first listening, but if disheartening message. whiney vocals" pop-punk ballad lover here) but you mind. Mocky's latest you persevere and are a 'Nice Streets Above' formula. Unfortunately the should never begin your album vacillates between great lover of the band, transmits a nightmarishly bands they are ripping off album with someone afro-cuban jazz and you can relax in the distorted snarl from what (Unwritten Law, The Ataris) saying: "Ladies and ambient groove all layered gentlemen, once in a sounds like a nuclear have already cast comfort of their unique over some rhythms lifetime, somebody is bom meltdown, while 'Half themselves into that sound for a couple of reminiscent of early 80s to brinq you something so Eaten' juxtaposes mould, making Antlskeptic hours and it'll give you a an inferior copy of an space invader sound incredible, something that break from thrashing all of chainsaw guitars and a already defective product. effects that you won't even you've never heard before..." and then not. their other albums which disco beat. Send manages When they do stray from realise you have forgotten to retain the innovation Sorry Shawn are sitting in your shelves their boy-band 'punk' until you hear them again. The fact that much of this that framed Wire's earlier The timbres used are as recipe, the results are Scott McDonald. album has come from a groundbreaking records, edgeless as they are generic plodding rockers vault which has not been even if their trademark seamless - you'll find no 'Blue in the Face ("More Than Kind") or opened for a time naturally cynical humour seems to insipid power ballads Bjork-esque industrial Doubledrive results in some of the have been sacrificed to ready-made for high noises here - think less (Roadrunner/Universal) make way for this record's Reznor and more Casio- tracks being a little dated, rotation on Triple M Big use of the delay pedal, intense aural assault. synth. What 1 adore about but not distractingly so. ("Running Now"). heavy distortion, great Jeremy Day this album is not just Jeremy Day leathery vocals with almost Mocky's versatility as an Scott McDonald too perfect intonation. 'Self-Destructive artist, but that his musical Lost in the Real Sky' Make no mistake about it - Pattern' canvases all turn out to be 'Self-Titled' Curseovdialect Doubledrive is about masterpieces, even when Spineshank original rock, rock in the (Valve) it sounds as if he's hurling (Roadrunner) vein of Nickelback, in the as much musical paint as There is no getting over vein of Bush, but not If Spineshank were striving he can muster at them. the fact that this release by influenced to tne point of for mediocrity with their Some tunes are high in the defiantly ripping off their style with a third full-length release, tension from being so unconventional few fresh chords or - as is they've outdone subdued, so just be aware Curseovdialect is fairty sadly the case - keeping themselves. Self- of the horror dreamscapes inaccessible stuff as far as the chords or riffs the destructive pattern is a which may await you hip-hop goes. Lost in the same and messing around repugnant mess of an before you sink into that Real Sky is a musical with the timing. None of album, an unholy marnage brown corduroy couch and Darth Vegas platter of unreined that here, and nothing too of two of the most evil get swallowed into Mocky- craziness. Obscure flashy or virtuosic either. (Valve) musical commodities; inspired insanity. samples clash with bizarre One point of interest contrived aggression and Imagine jedi light sabre sounds and animated though: track 2 lingered lethargic grunge-lite. They Sound obscure? Listen fights inside the casino rapping, all delivered at a with me for a couple of would like you to believe yourself and describe the Circus Circus - lots of breakneck pace: see that they are seriously days on the first hearing, flashing lights, pain and 'Baby How'd We Ever Get feeling better. This is one and has multiple pissed-off dudes, but their virus you'll want to catch. screaming, electronica This Way?' and it's loony sledgehammer nffs and references to Jesus Christ pokie sounds, nubile rapping over what sounds guttural screaming are Scott McDonald and making a commitment trapeze artists defying like a stapler appreciation undermined by the towards him. I couldn't find gravity bassy heavy- society holding their 'Self-Titled- any other references in the breathed half-robots and unconvincing 'poor twisted Shawn Desman annual meeting at a pokies me' sad-sack lyrics that rest of the album to this monkeys in little pairs of club. Of note also is 'Wolf (Uomo/BMG) being a Christian rock pants. Put a soundtrack to permeate the songs. With My first confession for this Moon', which makes good songs like 'Smothered', band a la Creed (the band It and you're halfway there. use of spine-chilling strings review is that a scan have shared the same Darth Vegas is as complex 'Consumed' and through my cd collection and horror movie effects. producer in the past), but as the mixing of its two 'Forgotten', Spineshank will produce no r&b newer The madcap shenanigans you never can tell - and namesakes - a futuristic are more miserable than than the '70s. It's a genre 1 on this record certainly these guys seem too dance which flirts Alice in Chains, and not never latched onto (apart unashamedly with Verve make for a unique audio straightforward to be half as articulate. from a shameful affair with label fusion jazz. This experience, but may not Shaggy which I will, after iror)}c. Pick Ihis one up if possess the durability to album has a group of According to the band this this review, hiereby deny) you're an Austereo highly skilled Sydney survive very many repeat was a difficult album to and therefore all my Network listener - it's your musos going ballistic but listens. make, so it is fitting that it is knowledge of r&b comes fodder and it tastes good. using schlock, hammer- a difficult album to listen to, Jeremy Day from drunken binqes which Scott McDonald horror and black and white about as much fun as end in front of the t.v. spaceman film scores as watching Rage in the wee 'Aurora' clenching a roll of coins in their canvas, I liked it but it your fist and punching hours of the morning. 'Cup of Sand' made my head hurt. Antlskeptic yourself in the head Therefore, I will admit that Superchunk Scott Mcdonald ((Toupee Records) repeatedly my opinion of Shawn (Trifekta/Merge Records) Desman as a largely The production on this Jeremy Day uninspired clone who 'Cup of Sand' is for the album is so slick as to be 'In Mesopotamia' seems more like a boy Superchunk die-harder, almost offensive, the Mocky band of one than a solo pedestrian riffs polished to artist should be taken with preferably those who have polite radio-friendly levels. (G o m m a/Wa r n e r been with them since the -UQ Ci 11 £ £ 9 £ -D r" 1 0 oi union 43 LIVID - It's Brisbane's biggest musical festival which has expanded to include other states. Here's a couple good reasons why you'll want to be heading to the RNA showgrounds this Oct 18 WHITE STRIPES Brother/sister, husband /wife..who really cares? It's the music we're talking about here people and these kiddies have got the goods. Having released their first self-titled album in 1999 their simple rock combo of drums and guitar have The Rolling Stones doing splits all over again. With 'White Blood Cells' undeniably one of the coolest albums around and their latest offering 'Elephant' disturbingly brilliant, you just have to catch this duo in action for one of their live high-rock energy shows. It's only likely that the Stripes titanic rise shall continue in the coming years. SING ALONG PICK: God dam this is a hard one... um probably 'Seven Nation Army'. JURASSIC 5 The Los Angeles-based team that is JURASSIC 5 are remarkable. Far from being strangers to our shores, their album ' It's Golden' was one of the best releases from last year with the hip-hop rapping melodies a throwback to the era of' block parties' and jamming vibe 'lunch' break-dancing in central park Guaranteed to bring a smile to your dial. SING ALONG PICK:' What's Golden'. The Roots The funks gonna hit the stage and the beats are gonna fly with Hip-hop legends The Roots taking their rightful place as the Livid ANNEX headliners. Their hip-hop blues sensibilities will have you bopping and rocking. Hitting straight for the jugular with their sentimental beat blues rhythms, you can't help but be transported back to the days of Mowtown. SING ALONG PICK The Seed.' BRWIC Don't' stop till you get your rock. American roots rock never sounded so good and these jaw dropping floppy haired rebels have got the worid in a bit of a tether over their hot-wired sound. What's not to like here? Thunderous drum beats, guitar riffs that get you all clammy this LA based band bring their brand new album "Take Them On, On Your Own" to Livid this year. And if we're lucky they'll set to will sabotage a few golf carts on the way as well.... SING ALONG PICK:' Whatever Happened to my Rock and Roll'. YEAH YEAH YEAH'S The delightfully clad Karen 0 loves her fashion and a bit of beer spurting over the crowds just for kicks. Hyped up and ready to return to Oz after a receptive audience response whilst supporting Jon Spencer Blues Explosion, YYY's are pure sexed up frock and roll with punk sensibility and plenty of feminine Grrrri SING ALONG PICK: ' Art Star'. RESIN DOGS How could you not have heard of this local (chuff chuff) phenomenal who has blasted onto the national super club route in the past couple of years. With the release of a recent r album, their horn samples, deck expertise itching and scratching up a storm, they'll have the whole crowd shaking their tushies. LAMB Probably best known for their stirring love (top wedding waltz) song 'Gorechi' (which Nicole Kidman ALMOST destroyed!!!) the stars are sure to twinkle a little bit brighter and the moon may perhaps even shed a tear at this masterful UK groups delicately woven melodies (Compelling you to snog/hug/embrace the closest one next to you). -UQ 44 union £ IA 9 9 0 9 £ A T DEXTER Known for his work with The Avalanches, Dexter has been labelled by Mr King Pin himself It Grandmaster 'big daddy' Flash as' little Big Daddy in waiting'. Knighted as one of the most innovative and creative DJ's in the worid (stick that in your pipe and smoke it Sasha), you' have to judge for yourself and maybe pick up a few expert tips along the way (that is if you can get in close enough..) HAR MAR SUPERSTAR Oh golly - what's not to love about this punchy bald RnB/ hip-hop 'George' wanna be. Not adverse to stripping off to show his hairy bits and pieces to the crowd this beanbag's also know for his sleazy but still pleasing mix of beats and down tempo rocking. But if he throw's t his undies to audience patrons, know that I'll be one of the first to duck and run for cover. J^j^ LITTLE BIRDY ^ •"% Well well well. Talent running in the family - The Sleepy Jackson's little sister has got a whole chirpy package of her own, Making her mark outside of her brothers band, Little Birdy has more recently been signed to Eleven (home to Silverchair and paulmac. But wait...there's more. LIARS AGAINST Lots and lots more! HAR MAR SUPERSTAR RAZEL There'll be a whole bunch ROSHAMBO of other acts to catch at Livid. THE ROOTS LINKIN PARK DEXTER MAD PROFESSOR JURASSIC 5 ^^^^^K jKf/' J^i THE LIVING END jH^^^Hi'x LAMB ^E^EciiV'^ LSH FRENZAL RHOMB H'i^-lKi RANSOM BANGARRA DANCERS WM RESIN DOGS \ rm^^^^HBB'i' ' '^^^^BflXpu PACIFIER \ "'^ MARK WALTON <' i^^M^^^^^^K > ''^••L^iJ^H ROCKET SCIENCE W'm CUT COPY GELBISON ttHf- -'^K- JOHNNY G ^^Wj^|HB| •^SBP ' '-gafc-'J^^BS^B SUNK LOTO OFFCUTTS ROLLERBALL WHIRLWIND HEAT NOODLES BUTTERFINGERS THE BEAUTIFUL GIRLS PROMISCUOUS LITTLE BIRDY THE BIRD BUMBLEBEEZ PRE SHRUNK JESSIE MALIN THE HERD THE INFORMANTS ELIXIR FULL FATHOM FIVE LOUDMOUTHS THEANYONES ME FIRST & THE GIMME INTERCOOLER GIMMES IRON ON TURBONEGRO LOVEJOY LESS THAN JAKE MELANIE GOLDFINGER GEORGE BOYSETSFIRE THE RED PAINTINGS r r WHITE STRIPES THE HELLACOPTERS BLACKREB E L MOTORCYLE CLUB TOE TO TOE YEAH YEAH YEAHS FOR AMUSEMENT ONLY GA200NGA ATTACK -UQ q^ 11 £ IE 9 £ 9> T" 1 0 li union 45 AGAN FAGAN is the 'brainchild' of two local Damien: " Oh I don't' know. Okay ' Lonely Semper" You're getting all ready to record an boys who met by chance whilst white male, 22 seeks partner sexy non album- wher's this all happening and have shopping for cds and guitars in a specific'.. Listen I really dunno! you any ideas already set in motion? Paddington pawnshop. Believe it or not, Dominic: " All 'ight let me have a go at Dominic: " Well, I certainly don't want an they had strictly reasonable excuses for Damien." album that drags on. being there and deny any involvement Damien:" This is going to hurt," Damien: "We're going to head away to a with anything to do with the adult world house in the Gold Coast Hinteriand to get of shopping. Dominic:" Um, how about - 'young male, non smoker enjoys solitude, romantic nights in away form distractions sometime in January Semper: So... how did Fagan come about? watching movies in a very smelly room'. next year to record. We've got loads of tracks Damien: " Well we just stared at each other ready Damien: "All right. Add onto Dom's one day We met in a Pawnshop. pedantically clean mate must have no Dominic: " 'Dante' took a while to come Semper: Sorry? A what? defects." together and that was partly because to the distractions down here. But we're not going to Damien: " No, nothing like that., no adult Dominic: "None of that's true we're both drag it out. We've already cot lots of material sexual entertainment. Although I'm sure that incredibly handsome. Sensitive New Age ready to go. would make for a far better story. I'd just Guys." moved to Bnsbane, around two and a half Damien:" We haven't come up with a title yet. Semper: Fair enough. Moving right along, years ago and I had no friends, was doing the I'm shit at naming things." how would you describe your sound? You've no friends thing and was scooping out some been compared to the likes of Massive Attack Dominic: "I've got one idea. 1 like the name cds in a pawnshop in Paddington. I was just and Lamb. What do you think of that 'For Your Ears Only" being an idiot and looking at stuff and there comparison? was this other guy who looked like a bigger Damien: "Yeah I don't." idiot than me and I was being a smart arse to Damien: " Yeah, 1 like Lamb- I really like Semper: Yeah, you could always have a him and it turns out he was Dominic." 'Gorechi' but that's about it. We don't; set out cover with you both dressed up as James to sound like Massive Attack or Lamb." Bond. Dominic:" It was a pretty big coincidence." Dominic: "I think that with the rest of our stuff Damien:" We started talking and it turned out Damien: "Hmmm, only if I can be the sexy people are going to be changing their we had the same sound cards and he realised lady in the skirt and Dom can be the man with opinions." I wasn't such a wanker. He loved me and I did the gun." to" Damien:" Um, it's diverse. I think we're more ambient live. Dominic: "All right, but only as long as 1 can Dominic: (laughing)" I don't know about that. touch your ass man." I'm not even his fnend I just take pity on him. Dominic: " We're very rockish sounding You should put a personal ad in the magazine crossing into Radiohead territory." Fagan's brilliant melodic single ' Dante' for him. He needs like a 'connections' type Damien:" The track I was working on today is currently available through Collison thing I think." was tin-can drumming and piano Simple, from all good record stores. The boys Semper: Speaking of personal ads and repetitive and kind of mediative as you're able wankers, what would you put in a personal ad to relax into it. We haven't yet defined our are busily preparing for their first ever for each other? sound yet. It's probably going to take people years to recognise Fagan and hopefully we'll gig @ Crossroads in Eariy Dec. Keep an Damien: Wow! That's a good question. All be able to keep on surpnsing them. eye out for further details. right for Dom I'd say ' reasonably attractive, no averagely attractive... Dominic:" It's easy for us to do that because we don't' have one singer, one guitarist and Sofie Ham Dominic: "What?" one bass player. We collaborate with others." •UQ 4f union u 9 9 0 9 A T M0i i]®Mj^:ysj Always on the hunt for 'new blood' on the Brisbane music scene, Semper caught up with the six members of acid jazz and funk band Night Monkeys to find out about their humble beginnings and how this indie band is making a mark on the local live circuit Originally formed for a shot at the 'big time' for the 2003 college band competition; Night Monkeys have suffered a bit of a line up change since their formation at the beginning of the year. However Ben Gibson (bass); Matt "Chunky" Munro (vocals); Steven Anning (Keyboards, Alto Saxophone); Andrew Parker (guitar); Euan Gray (Tenor Saxophone) and Richard Seymour (Drums) seem to have settled in their desired musical niche; with all members committing to being serious about their musical collaboration and future recording possibilities. " The current line up has been together for about four or five months. We just swapped everything. I guess you could say we went on a bit of a kicking out spree but we really wanted to get people involved who were really serious about the band," Ben says. With the boys taking their name from an episode of tie gross-out American series directed by 'Jackass'; their unique groovy tunes develop in between uni timetables when they get together to jamming out new material. " The beginning of each rehearsal starts with a sort of jam and we come together. Ben will play a bass riff and then the drums will kick in and everyone will join in and we'll just start playing whatever. I'm normally inspired to write some lyrics that fit closely to the sound. We're not really spurred on by what the market wants or what the majority wants. It's all about what we want to play We hope that if we can transpire that live energy others will enjoy it as well," vocalist Matt says. "The songs are usually about events In life. Three seconds is about Chunky missing the bus," Ben laughs and the other boys roar at Matt's expression. " Yeah, 'Three Seconds' is a very bitter song, a very angry song," laughs Matt, " 1 was very upset. It's about when 1 was waiting for a bus. Waiting for half an hour at a bus stop and then I hailed this bus and turned around to grab my bag and the bus driver just closed the door and drove off. I chased after the bus and threw my bag at the windows, but he wouldn't let me on. I had to wait another half an hour. That's half an hour of my life gone and three seconds was all it would have taken me to get on the bus and (the bus driver) didn't let me - hence the title 'Three seconds'." "No other members of the band endorse these lyrics either," NM drummer Richard Seymour laughs, "Most of the lyrics are about killing people and all the things that can happen in three seconds. 1 find it very hard to be serious so I just write songs that take the piss out of my own life. There's another song called 'Fashion' which was about a fashion experience that I had and I don't understand it. I mean, people buy jeans with patches on them and play $400.1 could patch my own jeans if 1 knew how to sew. Actually I do know how to sew, but that's a whole other story," Matt discloses a dark secret that he desperately tries to cover up with the revelation that their Keyboardist, Steve can knit. With a wacky sense of humour that can evidently can be heard through their music, the boys have recently recorded a few live tracks for local community radio station 4ZZZ, which are set to go to air very soon." We recorded a live set yesterday I think it sounds pretty good. There's no touch ups and we're scheduled for an interview and that'll ai! be aired on 4ZZZ," Ben says. " We're also set to do a gig at The Zoo and we've kind of got a residency at Number 12 as well as a couple of other gigs. We're currently doing all our own management. It's tough to do yourself because to have to organise all your own bookings and we've done all our own web design, demo cds, posters and all that. It's pretty much a full time job, but we seem to be doing all right." Sofie Ham Visit nlghtmonkeys.com for further info on the band and listen into Brisbane's fabulous community radio station 4Z2Z for future NK releases and gig info. -UQ CL 11 9 £ 9) 9" Q 0 oi union 47 i-lf^r 'm. Feather & Leather It's all about sensing art rather than simple viewing it with the Institute of Modern Art's latest exhibition from three contemporary artists Lisa Relhana, Beata Batorowicz and| Greg Leong. Studying a Doctorate of Fine Arts at the Queensland College ofl Art, Brisbane artist Beata Batorowicz has been examining the relationship between fathers and daughters, unravelling the| myths and misconceptions through art. " It's really important to me because I think that it's a discourse! that has really been lacking in the visual arts forte and I feel its an I in between area that seems to be shied away from. What !'ve| done it to adopt a metaphorical father figure in Joseph Beuys," Beuy's ' the German granddaddy of late 20th century conceptual! art is challenged by Batorowicz through her installation ' anti-bigl 1 yr> ^ Daddy art'. Taken from Beuy's story of being shot down during thel second worid war and surviving the crash being nursed back to! life by a pack of wolves, Batorowicz mimics Beuy's own strategy! M » of gross fabrication. With large aeroplane wings constructed froml knitted piece of red fully wool. Patch-worked and sticked together,[ .(fUAHtUt Batorowicz thus employs knitting as a system to expose other| systems that' elevate themselves to positions of authority'. .VV t I've become a daughter of Joseph Beuys and as a 'daughter' so to speak I can challenge him and his constructs. I'm interpreting! knitting as a form of feminism. I'm from a polish background sol Ithere's that German polish history that comes through - but it's making fun and critiquing art and history itself and the way people take! lit all too seriously I learnt how to knit for the project and used the fluffy wool (laughsO so that when you look at (the art) you can't seel the mistakes. I wanted a furry feel the artwork. 1 think that this laborious process is always simply regarded as a feminie thing and l| kind of wanted to bring that out there and make it a huge thing that can't be disregarded or avoided." Another amazing piece that Batorowicz worked on was collaboration with New Zealand artist Lisa Reihana. " I met Lisa through the curator of the exhibition (Rose McDougall). It was a sort of a blind date thing (laughs) and it seems to have! worked out okay We decided to talk about cultural heritage and communication and Lisa had a whole heap of old 'Xena, Warriorl Princess' costumes and we came up with the ides to use all the goatskins to create some wild mats with bits of leather tied on. Wel wanted to transform Ihe gallery space into something warmer so that people could actually stand and be able to touch. We really want| the patrons to experience and feel the space." Another part of the 'Xena' creation is the inclusion of 'communication devices', which Beata and Lisa actively encourage patrons to| |use. You walk across the mat and you can see these antlers and horns. They're actually listening devices and we decided to piay we thel lidea of communication. They're actually listening devices similar to the tin-can walkie-talkies. We want people to hold them and talk| through them." Completely tired of knitting Beata is planning to show her work in the Victoria Gallery and incorporate some of her other contemporary| |art pieces for that show. I'm well and truly sick of knitting. I've got a couple of other pieces so 1 may incorporate them into my (Victorian) show. I think that! Iwith contemporary art there's always good art and bad art and it all comes down to personal taste. I think that good contemporary art! offers many layers. There has to be something that reaches and engages different audiences. You simply have to tell your own story sometimes and hopefully others will see something in common and keep an honesty going through it." Sofie Ham READYMADE is currently showing @ The Institute of Modern Art, 420 Brunswick St (main entrance Berwick St) Fortitudel Valley until Oct 11. -UQ 4S union n 9 £ 9 0 9 A •r The Secret Life of Writers Judi McCrossIn, one of the writers behind the hit series The Secret Life Of Us donatedI her valuable time to open this years Brisbane Writers festival. Semper caught up with this enigmatic and very funny woman to discover a little bit about her past and her fond affection for a certain 'Dr Rex'. " I just love Rex. He's so sexy I have to say I've created my dream man and it's rex. He's the doctor we all dream about. I guess I've become rather attached to him. We actually do get people who become very attached and Sibylla Budd ('Gabriel') was once getting people coming up to her complaining to her about her on-screen husband thinking that he's real. I guess that's why people love it and why it's so popular, because ti is very much like real life and deals with issues that other shows don't' deal with. Some of the actors have a bit of a hard time dealing with some of the themes and issues we (writers) come up with. I know in the episode that dealt with abortion, Claudia Karvan ('Alex') was pregnant at the time and had difficulty say':ng a line where Alex talks about drinking and how it may have affected her pregnancy But the cast are great - they all do their best and it shows. The cast came together all really well. We had huge trouble trying to rind someone for the character of Aiex but when we found Claudia we just knew. She didn't even have to audition."Writinq her instalments for the series, Judi takes elements from her own life and her close fnends stories and intertwines them into the tales. She writes from the point of view that the characters of Evan and Alex are her at different times in her life. "My friends all watch the show and sometimes they look at Claudia and go 'that's just so you' or 'when did you go an dc that?' I write a lot of my life into me story line and none of my friends seem to mind. I think they'd bash me up if they did, I did get to have a starring role in the wedding episode (between Alex and Rex) and my T must have been crap because my fnend s said as though I didn't look as though I was supposed to be there," McCrossin laughs Having written several of the series episodes, Judi (who has also directed several acclaimed short films), is currently developing a six part drama series for SBS about one of Brisbane's longest running indie radio stations: 4ZZZ. "We still haven't got a name for the show yet but I've always thought what a great story it would make. Brisbane has a whole history that seems to have been not yet documented in film or television. I mean, there are so many stories from the whole Joe Bjeike Peterson era and I feel that it needs to be documented. Brisbane has a wonderful feel to it and I reckon that it's got a bit of a tale to tell." McCrossin's enthusiasm is almost contagious as she excitedly talks about her current project. i've got a researcher going about collecting everything that we can find and I'm going to do all that I can, but it's been all very hazy - not surprising I guess. Many of the old tapes and documents have just become forgotten or thrown out. At times it can be very very frustrating." Sofie Ham The Brisbane Writers Festival runs from Oct 1- 5 @ the cultural forecourt, South Bank. For further information Ph: (07) 3325 0254 or visit www.brisbanewritersfestival.com.au 'On the Road to Anywhere' BOOK REVIEWS Hugh Lunn. (Hodder) Writer Hugh Lunn has published seven books of memoir, making 'Sushi Central' him a unique publishing phenomenon in Australia. He has a Alasdair Duncan huge, loyal following, largely due to the bestselling memoir of his Brisbane childhood, Over the Top with Jim. In his most recent (UQP) book. On the Road to Anywhere, Lunn chronicles how his life has **** changed since the publication of Over the Top. Lunn is natural storyteller whose affection for the people and places he writes UQ student Alasdair Duncan brings forth his first novel about a about transcends the page. The book is a tribute to 'real' gay sixteen-year-old named Calvin. Falling in love with Anthony, Australians like Ian 'Mecca' McNamara, the ABC radio presenter Calvin whilst struggling with his identity and the confusion of first who turns Over the Top into a successful radio serial, and actor love, teeters on the edge of the adult worid and the complications Billie Brown who helps turn Over the Top into a successful theatre of tentative and reckless homosexual relations. With a choppy production. With so much success stemming from a memoir that narrative format delivered in the form of emails and snappy celebrates Australian culture, it is disappointing to see Lunn take conversations the book reads as if it was destined to be a film or such a pessimistic stance in On the Road. Lunn despairs at the play script. Sushi Central is similar to the likes of 'Head On' and 'Americanisation' of our culture and seems to wish everything in 'Frantic', but delves deep into certain teenage angst themes that Australia had stayed how it was in the 1950s. I am sure many other contemporary young adult novel. Duncan is to be credited older readers would agree with him, but I felt frustrated, for his narrative style and discription of characters, building this particulariy with Lunn's pitying disapproval of the 'youth of today'. bittersuit tale about coming of age and sexual miss-adventure. 1 wish he could see my 14-year-old brother and his mates up north, who fish during the day and rock roofs at night. Maybe it Sofie Ham would cheer him up. The world is getting smaller, but Australian culture lives on. Tara Thorne. .UQ Ci li £ 9 £> T' q 0 fi union 49 THEATRE PLACE AND MEMORY - The graphic work of William Robinson showing @ QUT Cultural Precinct until Dec 7. ALONE IT STANDS - Recapture the excitement of those tight rugby shorts from the 1978 rugby match between Ireland and NZ. READYMADE - Beata Batorowicz, Lisa Reihana and Greg Leong Showing® QPAC Playhouse from Sep 30 until Oct 18. Bookings: go through the use of objects to create a range of characters who 136 246. move through time and space weaving together myth, history and present a playful celebration of the imagination. Shov^/ing @ IMA, BY BURNING IRON- Spend the night in the self -help group of a 420 Brunswick St, Fortitude Valley until Oct 11. Ph: (07) 3252 psychiatric hospital. Showing @ Metro Arts from Sep 24- Oct 18. 5750. Ph: 136 246. SEEING THE CENTRE- Floor talk of the exhibition on Cot 15 OUR TOWN - Thorton Wilders classic tale showing @ Chelmer from 12pm @ Qld Art Gallery. Ph: (07) 3840 7338. Community Centre, Chelmer from Sep 28- Oct 11. Ph: (07) 3379 7176. STORYPLACE - Featuring the Indigenous art of Cape York and the rainforest region, this exhibition is the first major survey of OUTSIDE EDGE - The dramas of family and friends set at a historical and contemporary art works of the Cape York region, cricket match. Showing @ the Brisbane Arts Theatre, Petrie featuring more than 300 works. Showing @ Qld Art Gallery until Terrace from selected dates until Oct 11. Bookings: 3369 23 44. Nov 9. Ph: (07) 3840 7303. PLAYING BURTON - Richard Burton is re-incarnated in a one- TRAILER- Works by James Avery showing @ IMA, 420 Brunswick St, Fortitude Valley from Oct 16-17. Ph: (07) 3252 man play Showing @ Cremorne Theatre from Oct 7-12. Ph: 136 5750. 246. WEARABLE ART - Costume, clothing and performance showing PHEDRA- Translated French theatre about the retiring of an @ Tony Gould Gallery, QPAC, South Brisbane until Oct 11. Ph: ancient Greek myth showing @ Powerhouse Theatre, Brisbane (07)136 246. Powerhouse. Ph: (07) 3358 8600. SPEED POETS: Spoken word on overdrive, downstairs at SWEENEY TODD - Musical theatre with black humour and razor- Belushi's (1st Sunday each month) in the Brunswick SL Mall. A sharp lyrics showing @ Lyric Theatre on various dates from Oct feast of spontaneous spoken wora, poetry and ranting all to the beats of DJ Crispy., free zines and Brisbane's hottest open mic 11-25. Ph: 136 246. section,.. Don't miss it! THE PRINCESS AND THE PEA- The story tale brought to the stage about a mysterious princess showing @ Brisbane Arts Theatre from Sep 24- Oct 25. Ph; (07) 3369 2344. UQ VANCUi&RD POWWOW ART WEEOf & rCNCEf ANTIPODES - Craft Queensland presents the first Australian viewing of the largest fibre works by Christine Ballinger. Showing @ CQ Gallery, 381 Brunswick St, Fortitude Valley Ph: (07) 3215 0808. ARCHEOLOGICAL - The product launch of jewellery by designer and goldsmith Michael Hofmeyer at the craft Queensland Gallery and Store, CQGallery, 381 Brunswick St, Fortitude Valley Ph: (07) 3215 0808. ARTISTS MAKING DO - An exhibition about what a group of emerging artists make or do when they are not making are. Showing @ The Palace Gallery, 46 Merivale St, South Bnsbane. BUSHFIRE - Ronnie Tjamptijinpa's latest works showing @ Fire- AlPARTOrniE Works Gallery, 11 Stratton St, Newstead. Ph: (07) 3216 1250. emwAwe vmiTEmiiESTivAi. COVER ART IMAGES - Collection of cover art images in ANDMW CARTON JAZYBAND conjunction with the Qld Arts Council's touring programs. Showing UE AV YWCieUT CUAMTCON @ State Library, South Brisbane until Oct 26. Ph: (07) 3840 7666. AONE-ACTPLAYIN COLLABORATIOM WITM FILM NOIR - Politique Blanche - A multi- media exhibition of UNDERCROimD PRODUCTIOPf f installation and film by Mike Parr and Adam Geczy Showing @ ARTEXUIDinONf OCA Gallery, Qld College of Art, Griffith University South Bank PEinPORMANCe POETRY until Nov 19. Ph: (07) 3840 7278. nWOAY 3WP OeTOBEP 0 JWWMyi LEUNIG ANIMATED - You've seen his work now enter his worid ^^1S^%^(C.. of cartoons with his creative exhibition showing @ the Qld ft^useum. South Brisbane until t^ov 16. Ph; (07) 3840 7555. BAWt (lOUlWWOUTilt tTART> 69m} -UQ •^0 union !M 9 9 0 9 £ A. 'f LIVE SCENE -- A guide to the best local GUS AND FRANK play THE ZOO OCT 10. and international acts. TEAM PLASTIQUE, KID KAY FERRIS and DISICKO slam it all down @ THE ZOO OCT 11. THE WAIFS, MISSY HIGGINs and JEZ play an eclectic set @ THET1V0L10CT12. WEIRD AL YANKOVIC plays QPAC CONCERT HALL, OCT 14. HABIB KOITE, BAMADA and ZIMBIRA perform @ THE BRISBANE POWERHOUSE from OCT 15-16. GRANDVILLE plays THE HEALER OCT 16. THE TREMORS play THE ZOO OCT 17. LIVID- you'd be a huge fool to miss this fantastic concert including LlNKlN PARK, the WHITE STRIPES, LAMB, J5, THE ROOTS and many more @ RNA SHOWGROUNDS, OCT 18. ALEX LLOYD plays songs off his latest album with support from LITTLE BIRDY @ The Arena Oct 24. STELLA ONE ELVEN @ THE HEALER OCT 25. CRAIG DAVID and JEREMY GREGORY play @ BEG OCT 28. SEP 26 THE ART OF FIGHTING play @ THE ZOO. THE RED PAINTINGS play @ THE ZOO OCT 30. SEP 28 JOHN MAYER brings the lurve songs to the BRISBANE ENTERTAINMENT CENTRE. BUTTERFINGERS bring the big time beats to THE ZOO OCT 31. YOU AM I @ THE ZOO, OCT 2-3 UPCOMMING- DEAD DAY SUN rock the roof off the INDIE TEMPLE on Oct 3. THE PEACHFISH (CD LAUNCH) @ THE TROUBADOUR NOV 15. DJ JAZZY JEFF, 2 DOGS, SEANY-B, MISS BROWN, KRISTIAN HERNANDEZ line up for Oct 4 @ THE ARENA. POWDERFINGER, JOHN BUTLER TRIO and THE TRMORS @ RIVERSTAGE NOV 29, THE BOAT PEOPLE, DAPPLED DITIES FLY, POLYVINYL and LOREN play THE ZOO, OCT 4. Rave fest ADVENTJAH featuring LEEROY, TIPPER, BRISK, BEXTA and more @ THE ARENA NOV 29. KRISTY APPS plays her soulful melodies ©THE HEELER OCT 4. SEMICOLON, MITYSCOOP and AMPHIBIOUS @ THE ALLEY NOV 30. RAMONE A-THON featuring a huge line up including GROOVIE GHOULIES, MACH PELICAN, ROSHAMBO DOWNSYDE @ THE ZOO DEC 5 and more play THE INDIE TEMPLE OCT 4. Go the distance for Australia's homegrown showcase of MARGARET ROADKNIGHT performs @ Judith Wright talent - HOMEBAKE @ THE DOMAIN (SYDNEY) Centre OCT 4. featuring NICK CAVE & THE BAD SEEDS, THE VINES, SOMETHING FOR KATE, THE SUPERJESUS, THE JOSH ARNOLD, SEAN SENNETT and RYAN TOOHEY JOHN BUTLER TRIO and more on DEC 6. perform @ The Zoo, OCT 9. METALLICA® BEC,JAN19. WOMEN IN DOCS, JUNIOR and GRAHAM RIX rock it out well and truly @ THE HEALER OCT 9. -UQ Ct 'II £ £ 9 V 1 0 fi union 51 00 n >* "n 01 3- 2 3- 53 3 N" •a Q) •o •p 5.5 O c" O yi P 9: po 3 3 ^ I" = 3 I'U m a a ZT a (D a(/) ••• a •— o h 8> -1 o O o •"• n MM* ^^ CD 3 i? 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IH X m — ;o H33 2 ro CD 2 5 Z^ °i o m zo o 2 m o[!] ^° 3) S ZT) 05z 2 3S °i w>x 33 •— > C3 F >o) 0C1 Z> Co r T3 > CD SO 0„T3* 50 05 WO i-roo-Tj ^™ ~ CD S e 3 o m • p— m c >• O r~ 01 (0 m > r- Or-^ H •I ^ ^ -- HO 33H CO •n o 00 — mo o > o m 5 OS z •1 OZ i TJ M o 5? -UQ union u 9 9 O 9 A. 'f pnatians .'." THI SOUNn OFMIKIC tmHENnDIHlVKJGH SKCtAL AMANCEMCNTWITH VUMtnueMPPni MU9CQN BEHAIFOTTHF RflrwiK It HAUUntmUTUrinr limuiiv W NMrvnai^ i fv°;fsp^p^ %^ Mcuflay S 1'hursday IS Friday 2^ TV Dinner "Friends" & "Malcolm in the EAS Spring/Summer Showcase, 4 rooms Uve Music "Misinterpotato":Spm @The Red Room Middle": 7pm @The Red Room including @The Red Room. 3pm-late. , $4 EAS '& Union members/$6 all others. Saturday 25 Octclier Bring your boogie shoes. BBQ on the Deck: 12 noon @The Red Room Pool Competition: Spm @The Red Room It'sAliveJerracefirma, Backalley, L9aferlounge Suitday 2S Octcber Wr^tfitf-sdaii 8 Friday 17 2-4-1 Main Meal: Spm @The Red Room Free BBQ & Band "DatsyCutters": I pm Live Music "Xavier": 6pm @ the Red Room @ Forum Area mcnday 27 Oclcber Pub Quiz: 5:30pm @The Red Room Saturday 18 TV Dinner "Fnends" & "Malcolm in the International Lesbian Day BBQ on the Deck: 12 noon @The Red Room Middle": 7pm @The Red Room Thursday 9 SuKday19 luesday 28 October Live DJ - Freestyle with EAS:4pm-l Ipm 2-4-1 Main Meal: Spm @The Red Room Pool Competition: spm @The Red Room @The Red Room IViGKday 20 Wednesday 29 Octcber Friday )0 TV Dinner @ The Red Room "Friends" & Free BBQ & Band "Future Native": Ipm Live Music "King George Affair": Spm "Malcolm in the Middle": 7pm .@ Forum Area @ The Red Room Pub Quiz:S:30pm @The Red Room 1ii(!:sday 21 Saturday 1) Pool Competition: S:30pm @The Red Room ITiursday 30 October BBQ on the Deck 12 noon ©the Red Room Live DJ - Freestyle v\^ith EAS 4pm-11 pm National Coming Out Day ifU^dnesday 22 @ The Red Room Free BBQ & Band "OffWith Fairies": Ipm Sunday 12 @ Forum Area Friday 31 Octcber 2-4-1 Main Meal: Spm @The Red Room Pub Quiz: 6pm @The Red Room Nik Phillips: I l:30-2:30pm @The Red Room The Front: 4pm-8pm @The Red Room WlcKday 13 Reclaim the Night TV Dinner "Friends" & "Malcolm in the Halloween Middle": 7pm @Tho Red Room llif^sday 1^ Pool Competition: Spm @The Red Room Wf^duf^sday 15 Free BBQ & Band "Gaddabouts": Ipm @ Forum Area Pub Quiz: 5:30pm @The Red Room rooi uq union bar & bistri