THE SIMPSONS: “WHO REALLY NEEDS THE KWIK-E-MART?” BY JAY BENOY THIS SPEC SCRIPT IS A WORK OF FICTION, INTENDED FOR THE CURE FOR THE SIMPSONS COMPETITION 2018. IT IS NOT AT ALL AFFILIATED WITH THE FOX COMPANY OR THE SIMPSONS, OR THE COMEDYCROWD. Jay Benoy
[email protected] @JonnyJonJon1 FADE IN: “THE SIMPSONS” - - TITLE SEQUENCE - - CHALKBOARD: “This show was actually funny nine years ago.” COUCH GAG: THE SIMPSONS RUSH IN TO THE HOUSE TO FIND JAMES WOODS, LOUNGING ON THE SOFA BESIDE POOCHY, THE DOG. They’re chilling about - Poochy looks worse-for wear and smokes CIGARETTES, with a full ASHTRAY right beside him, and Woods wears the Kwik-E-Mart STAFF UNIFORM. JAMES WOODS (With glee) Ooh-hoo, controversial. OPENING TITLE SEQUENCE ENDS. FADE IN: ESTABLISHING SHOT: SPRINGFIELD. MUSIC UP: “BETTER DAYS” BY GRAHAM NASH We see the POWER PLANT - - MOE’S - - KRUSTY BURGER - - THE TIRE FIRE - - A sweaty, hot SUMMER DAY. A TRAFFIC CONE - - It melts to ORANGE GOO on the sidewalk. - - We close in on the KWIK-E-MART. MUSIC FADES OUT. INT. KWIK-E-MART – DAY A bored and restless APU HOLDS HIS HEAD UP ON THE COUNTER. A man enters - - the AUTOMATED RING of the convenient store’s DOORS accompany him - - Apu doesn’t remotely acknowledge the man - - WE STAY ON APU. CUSTOMER VOICE (O.S) How much for ice? APU Nine dollars. CUSTOMER VOICE (O.S) What a rip! “Who Really Needs The Kwik-E-Mart?” .2 We hear the doors go once again, just as before, as the man LEAVES instantly.