FREE 09/11/00 Issue no: 993 Floods Part Global A Century 2: Photos Warming of Fakers Security Policy p3 p5 p9 p17 Great Balls Of Fire The touring freak show turned out to be stranger than usual, last Wednesday in the Union. As the ‘Carnival of the Bizarre’ ended their performance, the Wacky Wednesday theme holding true, a surprise was in store for everybody, including the performers. During the performance where the audience were dazzled by the celebration of the weird and won- derful, we had seen sparks fly with the act where chain-saws were used on metal sheets attached to the performers’ bodies. Earlier on the Mongolian Laughing Boy had meat hooks attached to his penis but just in case that ordeal was not painful enough for him, he then ran on to the main stage and launched an enormous fireball, with some of the flames going on to the stage 1) Fireball Trick, 2) Face on Fire, 3) Man Runs Off to put Fire Out itself. However, all was not quite as it seemed with the finale. The laughing boy had inadvertently set light to his own face. He ran straight over to the curtain, to put Troubled Water the fire out on it, with most of the audience unaware that anything nd had gone wrong, believing it to beLast Thursday (2November), an incident tookthe union reception. was close to passing out, so security placed all part of the show. The laughingplace in the Student’s Union, which led to the Upon arriving at reception, security immedi-him in the recovery position, whilst still restrain- boy was taken straight to hospitallocal police becoming involved and a studentately took control of restraining the student,ing him. In the meantime, the union security by ambulance and treated forspending the night behind bars. who did attempt, unsuccessfully, to punchensured that all other students were able to burns. The first year Chemistry male was returningthem. They then asked for his union card,leave the union quickly and safely. The laughing boy has nowto university from a round of pub golf in town;which he refused to supply, and greeted the The police arrived within about ten minutes rejoined his touring colleges andhe was described by witnesses as in a drunkenrequested with a further attempt to assault aof being called and after the student attempted will be performing his act again,and abusive state, when he walked into themember of the security team. After managingto punch them as well; they decided to take him suffering no after-effects. It hasunion. The time was about 11:05pm and thereto once again restrain the gentleman, unionto the local station, where he spent the night in since become apparent that one ofwas no security on the door because at thissecurity rang for university security. the cells. He was released, without charge, the the reasons for the act goingtime their task is to ensure that any students Within a matter of minutes, the team fromfollowing morning. The student has since writ- wrong was that the performer usedstill in the building begin to vacate it. The stu-Senate House arrived, initially one, soon to beten an unreserved apology to all concerned lighter fuel instead of paraffin fuel. dent then proceeded to begin attacking anoth-joined by a further three. They took over theregarding his behavior that night, and it is er student, unprovoked, but due to the levels ofrestraining of the student. However, despitebelieved that no further action is being taken on By Luke Hickey alcohol he had consumed, the victim, believedadvice from the union security as to the conse-the incident. Photos by Alan Roy to be a friend of his attacker, was not injured inquences of attacking the senate security, he the attempted assault. After a time the victimattempted to punch a member of the SenateBy Luke Hickey. had managed to restrain his fellow student, byteam. Immediately the police were called. The which time security had arrived at the scene,drunken student then threw-up on the floor and Student Democracy: Have Your Say With all these special working partiesCouncil, whose next meeting is on Tuesdaydiscussion. building. going on to improve the services of theat 1pm on the main Union dancefloor. Union Club, it is perhaps worth remem-Members of the various Union sub-commit-Topics under debate this Tuesday willDavid Abbott bering that there is already an in-depthtees, as well as representatives from allinclude the tricky issue of campus securityUnion Chair structure in place to ensure that theclubs and societies and all the Union offi-cameras and a proposed constitutional Union is entirely responsible to itscials are expected to attend (or send apolo-interpretation that will affect all religious and members. gies), but perhaps you did not know that allinternational societies. You can inspect a members of the Union are equally welcome,copy of the agenda and all submitted At the top of the tree, the supreme policy-and have the right to speak and vote on anymotions on the Union notice board immedi- making body of the Union is the Studentsubject raised, or even propose a motion forately opposite the main entrance to the [email protected] News 1-3n Features 4-6, n Barearts 7 - 18n Lifestyle 20 n Sport 22-24 News 2 09/11/00 Editorial of the evening while I was left with grumbling of my stomach for the evening. D’oh Hopefully, you all managed to spot all the mistakes in Editorial Team last week’s editorial, however, if you do spot any inKevin Marston the paper this issue then please come and join the Editor Editorr barefacts proof reading club. This is opportunity for Kevin Marston you to see the paper in advance and a great addition to your CV, so if you fancy it emaiil me at Deputy Editorr [email protected] Luke Hickey If you were in Chancellors on Tuesday night around Production Editorr about 6.00pm you may have heard this almighty Andrew Thomas laughter from one of the tables on the stage. Well, News Team Film Editors this table was laughing at me and my unfortunate luck of swallowing the top part of my tongue piercing, James Buller Sariqa Wagley which I can tell you is not an enjoyable experience. Arthi Veerupillai Libby Hurt The rest of the table was in stitches for the remainder Features Editorr Science Editorr Vacant Nick Walsh Music Editorr Sports Editorr Owen Hazelby Dave Chapman Arts Editorr Marketing Team ChrisMorton Ali Danby Ellen van Keulen by Arthi Veerupillai Iranian Politician on Trial Radioactive leak Contributers Ali Danby Jamileh Kadivar, one of Iran's leading female politi-It has been reported that the rivers around a secret Ellen van Keulen cians, has been put on trial. She is charged with act-nuclear weapons complex, in Siberia have been badly Dave Abbott ing against Iran's national security and insulting Islam,contaminated. A joint team of monitors said, "We've Susie Westwell which relate to a conference in Berlin, last April. Mrs.never encountered such radiation. It's the worst con- Gisela Böhnisch Kadivar, widely recognised as Iran's most populartamination we've found". Even though the leak has Tom Sugarman female reformer, denies the allegations. She main-damaged the plant and river life, there are no inten- Melanie Wilberforce tains that the Iranian authorities knew about the con-tions of closing the plant down, as the plant provides Andrew Gale ference beforehand and did not even attempt to pre-heating and electricity to the nearby town, Tomsk. Greensoc vent anybody from going. At least 20 further people MWC have been charged in relation to the conference. Judgement Day Claire Hathway Rebecca Lambert South African Policemen Charged with The long waits for the " King of US" Stella Webb Brutality will now come to an end as millions of people voted Madeleine M today. The first to vote were New Hamshire and Samuel Hardwick Six South Africian policemen have been charged withDixville Notch. The results so far - Bush got 38 votes, & Dr Russ the attempted murder of three black suspects. TheAl Gore took 18 and the Green Party candidate Ralph white policemen were caught on an ametur videoNader had one according to the associated Press. laughing as they set dogs on the suspects, alledgly illegal immigrants. The dogs savaged the men's faces, The World is not enough arms and legs. The footage also shows one of the offi- cers repeatedly kick and beat the suspects, while theyJames Bond in real, yep its true! The Millennium barefacts were lying on the floor, in agony. The footage was shotDome was under attack by a gang of robbers who Union House, University Of Surrey in 1998 but has only recently been made public. used a bulldozer to get in through the gates. The Guildford, Surrey, GU2 7XH thieves were trying to rob the diamonds and the Cease-fire in Jerusalem??? Millennium Star, which were on display in The Money Tel: 01483 879275 Zone. Luckily the police and the owners were tipped Fax: 01483 534749 Just when the Israeli Prime minister Ehud Barak andoff, this prevented a "Great Robbery". The diamonds email: [email protected] Palestinian Leader Yasser Arafat finally plan to meetwere said to be worth around £350 millions while the Deadline for Publication in order to end the bloodshed between their countries,Star priceless. Six people were arrested at the scene a massive car bomb exploded in the heart ofwhich police believe reconstructed the scenes of Bond Monday 12pm Jerusalem. The meeting was already late and then itmovies, as they found a speed boat on the shores of was totally put off as the bomb shocked the city lastthe Thames which belonged to the robbers.