Research Based Parenting Program to Support the Development of A

Research Based Parenting Program to

support the Development of a Reintegrated Family

Dr. Carol Anne Wootton Program Summary: Educational Psychologist The programme is based on a child-centered, meaning-based

D.Ed. (Psych.) perspective and is informed by the latest research in M.Ed. Guid & Couns. (Cum Laude) neuroscience and trauma. It is a Psycho-Educational Program B.Ed (Cum Laude) B.A. Psych (Honours) aimed at skill building and helping parents understand the Dip. Remed. Educ. (Cum Laude) effects on their children of the following main areas: how Dip. Educ. trauma shapes the brain; how trauma shapes attachment (+27) 83 303 1384 patterns and interactions; how trauma shapes parenting styles; [email protected] patterns of divorce with a focus on positive parent-child interactions, and how to lessen and repair trauma through

Ms. Marilyn Davis-Shulman relationships that put the needs and the best interests of the Clinical Psychologist child first. It includes support strategies and homework tasks M.A. Clinical Psych. (Cum Laude) on child-based interventions to promote better attunement, B.A. Psych (Honours) emotional regulation and healthy relationships between B.A. Social Work (Honours) B.A. Sociology children and parents to help mitigate the effects of an acrimonious and conflictual divorce on children. This program (+27) 83 377 5245 [email protected] was developed by Dr. Carol Anne Wootton in collaboration with Marilyn Davis-Shulman.

Goals: To use psycho-education and skills- based strategies and interventions to educate parents about the following concepts: • Trauma and how it affects the developing brain. • Emotional hi-jacking and how to recognize it. • Autonomic nervous system responses such as fight/flight/freeze/appease and how to deal with them. • Attunement. • Emotional regulation; the A,B,C model and the Four S model. • Reflective listening. • Parenting which facilitates a Secure Attachment style. • Parenting Styles and how to be an Emotion Coach for your child. • Addressing the concept of pervasive negative exchanges as well as Affinity, Alliance, Estrangement and Alienation as different forms of relationships that have developed post- divorce. • Healing and repair in a re-constituted family.

Module Outline

Module 1:

• Detailed questionnaire to obtain history and to support the client in the telling of their story. • Understanding the losses and challenges the situation has incurred, both for the children and the parents. • Homework focused on building the child-parent relationship.

Module 2:

• What is Trauma and how does it affect the child’s developing brain? • Critical information on defining the different types of trauma, signs of trauma in children, and the effects of trauma on the emotional, social and cognitive development of the child. • The neuroscience of trauma is described to allow the parent to understand the flight/fight/freeze/appease response mechanisms and how to support the child during these times. • Practical strategies and child centered activities are discussed to promote Attunement, Emotional regulation, and Interactive Listening, which the parent needs to practice during the week. • Books are prescribed for further education and enjoyment.

Module 3:

• Trauma Informed Attachment Parenting. • Early attachment development and experiences. • The nature of the attachment bond and understanding the need for secure attachment. • The parent’s role in attachment and different attachment patterns that can develop. • How children adapt to their world. • Attachment patterns pass from generation to generation. Discussion around how we are affected as adults. • Child centered activities are discussed on how to develop secure attachment by using the following: A,B,C’s of attachment; the 4 S - Safe, Seen, Soothed and Secure. • Books are prescribed for further education and enjoyment.

Module 4:

• A Trauma- Informed Model for Developing Positive Parenting. • The role of the Conscious Parent and the importance of a supportive family structure. • Four different Parenting Styles are referred to and a quiz to establish the parent’s present style of parenting. • The 5 steps of Emotion Coaching are explained to promote a Positive Parenting Model. • Philosophies and aspects of the Filial Therapy program and Mind Power for Children to help parents develop positive parenting and attachments. • Practical exercises are discussed on how to use different empowering and relationship building activities to strengthen relationships and to develop competence, success, and self-responsibility in children. • Books are prescribed for further education and enjoyment.

Module 5:

• Discussion of the definition of a High Conflict separation and/or divorce situation (Pervasive negative exchanges; Hostile and Insecure emotional environment) – emphasis on building positive parent-child relationships. • Discussion of a shared narrative where the children belong in the center of both systems with good parenting practices which keep the needs of the child in the forefront. • Reiterate the main concepts learned in the program which lead to Parental Fitness (Empathy, Attachment; Adaptability; Affect Control; Autonomy) and Good Parenting (Safety and Security; A nurturing educational environment; Consistency; Emotional availability; Compassion and affection; Understanding the child’s world; Support of the other child-parent relationship). • How to move towards less pervasive negative exchanges and discussion of Affinity, Alliance, Estrangement, Alienation. • Questionnaire to discuss reflections on what has been learned and any changes that might have occurred. • Discussion of goals going forwards.

The Developers of the Program

Dr. Carol Anne Wootton is an Educational Psychologist who has extensive experience gained over many decades working with children in private practice as well as within educational institutions. Dr. Wootton is also a trained Elementary School Teacher and Learning Support specialist dealing with children who experience learning difficulties. Throughout this time, Dr. Wootton has worked closely with parents to support the development of attachment, early bonding, building strong relationships, parenting styles, as well as support strategies within the home. The main focus for both her Masters and Doctoral research has been around the area of Emotional Intelligence and she developed and implemented a program to support children’s emotional needs at the American International School of Johannesburg, where she practiced for many years as the School Counsellor in the Elementary School. Dr. Wootton has used her training in the fields of Sand Play Therapy, EMDR (Eye Movement De-Sensitization and Re-Programming); Child Centered Therapy; Narrative Therapy; Developmental Touch; Filial Therapy; Logotherapy, Healing the Body through Play, Social and Emotional Literacy, and the use of Creative Art Therapy techniques, to empower children, and be part of the process of healing in her practice. Dr. Wootton is passionate about caring for and supporting the unique needs of each person and committed to therapeutic growth and development for both children and their parents.

Marilyn Davis-Shulman is Clinical Psychologist and Educational Social Worker registered with the Health Professions Council of South Africa in private practice who is also a specialist in the fields of Trauma and Addiction, Family and Child Mediation, and Parent Co- ordination. In addition, Davis-Shulman has been trained in the neuro-biological legacy of complex traumatic stress and has achieved certification in traumatic stress in advanced trauma treatment. This has informed her practice and added to her wealth of experience and efficacy in the field, over many decades.

Ms. Davis-Shulman has had extensive training in family therapy and mediation with a special focus on attachment difficulties within dysfunctional family systems. In addition, Ms. Davis-Shulman is called upon by the High Court to conduct investigations into the best interests of minor children with regard to parental rights and responsibilities and provides recommendations in order to assist the court and is trained in family & child mediation to help repair reconstructed family dynamics. Ms. Davis-Shulman is committed to support healthy family dynamics, and the growth and development of each individual within the family system.