Wilfrid Laurier University, Waterloo Volume 28, Number 24, Thurs. March 17,1988 the CORD

More than just talk: students want action By Lynn Marchildon Some people just didn't come in and MPPs. because it wasn't worth it." "The power of students is

TORONTO (CUP) - About 500 Despite the obvious effects of unquestionable," said Weir, pointing frustrated college and university underfunding, Tony Macerollo, chair out David Peterson's pledge to students converged on the lawn of of the Canadian Federation of Stu- eliminate exclusionary oy-laws as an the Ontario legislature March 10 to dents, said students need to demon- example of how student pressure demand the government live up to strate to publicize their concerns. has resulted in action. Weir said the its promise of excellence in post- "The general public takes it for OFS and the University of Western secondary education. grantedthat colleges and universities students' union plan to deliver more "We have listened and we have are good things to have but we've than 8,000 signed postcards to the waited and we re fed up," rallied got to force a "kitchen discussion," premier insisting that he live up to Ontario Federation of Students' on post-secondary education be- his promised legislation. chair Sheen Weir. cause it's in serious trouble." Weir said, however, the post- "Quality, world class, internation- secondary community's most immed- ally competitive, excellence, is what Macerollo said the Ontario liberals iate problem is absorbing the 5,000 this government has promised. are adept at making even the extra students who have applied to signi- Debt-ridden students, disintegrating smallest announcements look university for next year. libraries, housing crises, overcrowd- ficant. "There's no more space on our ing, underfunding - that is what this "They're not doing anything. I government has delivered." think the one thing they have done is classroom floors, there aren't enough library books, there are not The rally, which wrapped up a a marvellous job of packaging things week of a province-wide under- and made it look wonderful." enough faculty," said Weir. "Never post- funding campaign, was the first of its Both Weir and OFS chair-elect before have so many wanted a secondary never before kind in three years. Shelley Potter urged students to education, Marching from the University of take the energy of the rally back has the post-secondary system been ill-equipped." Toronto, students ignored Toronto home to their university community so stoplights, cheered arriving school busses of additional students and waved one dollar bills and placards imploring Premier David Peterson to stop the cutbacks. John Starkey, president of the Ontario Confederation of University Faculty Associations, congratulated students on their persistence, saying the April budget will be a chance for the government to "put its money where its mouth has been for the last two years." voice Just along for the ride: Last Saturday night at Fed Hall "Jailhouse Joe" Raising his to be heard above the chanting students, Myke, bassist for The Razorbacks, played his instrument in every Starkey said, "It is quite clear to all conceivable position—on his head, with his feet, while lying on his back, of us that the 4.5 per cent (increase standing on it (above), and even occasionally in an upright position. For a in operating grants) that the trea- peak at The Razorback scrapbook turn to page 17. Cord photo by Cori Cusak surer promised us last November is not enough. Just to maintain the present level of inadequate services requires over 10 per cent." More opportunities Starkey said over the last 10 years, universities have absorbed 23 per By Eric Beyer * students working after graduation cent more students and increased per on building about the in education-related jobsfor up to 12 research activities by 30 cent. Dr.Saul Cohen, spoke Friday in the Peters Changes designed to attract more months; The real increase in funding dunng strategic and geographic importance of the Gaza strip. The professor * 10 of geography Hunter College in New York predicts that a political post-secondary foreign students to students in Canada under the those years was two per cent he at will come are "mutually exhausted," and Canada were announced February auspices of the Canadian Inter- said. settlement only when both sides 23 by Benoit Bouchard, Federal national Development Agency. NDP education critic Richard are forced to go to the negotiating table. The Gaza strip is the land area that they as a buffer zone between Israel and neighbours. Cohen emphasized Minister of Employment and Immi- Foreign students will continue to Johnson told students have a acts its importance Gaza of the table, and for gration. be exempt from visa processing right to expect adequate funding for the of for the control water the water supply of Israel. Cord photo by Eric Beyer The changes will loosen employ- fees. the system. ment restrictions for visa students. President-elect of Laurier's "You should have the right to go They were implemented on March Chinese Student's Association, through education without acquiring 1. Serena Lai, said that the new policy a debt load the size of a small third "I think its great, but it comes too should help qualified students who world country," said Johnson. Holding an "Oh Another Changes coming late," said fourth year Business cannot study in Canada because of Shit, student Vincent Lui, a visa student a lack of money. She emphasized Promise (OSAP)" sign, first year studying at Laurier. The Hong Kong the need for employers and visa Ryerson film student Dave Watts native said the policy should have students to know of the policy as said the effects of underfunding are for business dip come earlier because he is already soon as possible. obvious. cameras we use first year far behind in his job search. "A lot of "Because its so new 1 don't know "The for By Linda Schmoll instead of two with no choice for good jobs have been taken." how long it will take for the majority film are 25 years old. Every now and electives. However, the first term Lui then they'll eat your film and you said that he and his friends of employers to know," Lai said. Another proposal for changes in couid be taken as part of the given won't be able to get your assignment had up looking for jobs last Lui, who wants to reside in the Laurier Business Program is undergraduate studies. semester because they thought they said he had a job lined up in in on time." Canada, being examined at the committee The Business Diploma was origin- would not have a chance at getting a with the contingency Waterloo math student, Shelagh Toronto, but level. ally designed for part-time students work permit. that he receive a work permit. Pepper said it's not only equipment Currently, students wishing to but many students from other Foreign students in the following According to Lui, a visa student that hampers the ability of students obtain a Diploma in Business disciplines have interest. groups are now granted permission were only eligible to receive a permit to get a quality education. Administration must complete six to accept work without the job if they have an outstanding quality "I took a course last term where The reason for the proposed two-term equivalent courses, three needing validation or being subject above of a Canadian. He said you had to get there ten minutes change is that the present program that required and three electives. to the availability of Canadians: that in his career goal, accounting, it early to get a seat," she said. "The does not have enough required * students working on-campus; rest of the people sat on the floor or The new proposal is to lengthen courses. The objective of the change * on page 3 spouses of students; continued dragged chairs from other rooms. the course load to three terms is to upgrade the program. THURSDAY, MARCH 17,1933 2 the CORD

the Tlx© WORDSMITH I

CORD WORD PROCESSING / TYPING I

•Resumes • Reports Letters/Mailing • Manuals March 17,1988 Ill ll I Typesetting Volume 28, Number 24 •Manuscripts (Cerlox & Therma-bind)

Rob EdltoMn-Chief Furlong Waterloo, Ontario N2J 2Y7 NEWS Editor Erlka Sajnovlc Associate Eric Beyer Contributors Undo Schmoll Jordon Lay Jim Lea Doug Earie COMMENT

Contributors Ken Whytock Andy Dunn KMMSMiIBB lan t. Kelso Debbie Hurst Corl Ferguson FEATURES Editor Michael Wert

ENTERTAINMENT Editor Kirk Nielsen For convenience and Contributors rp= =fi II Steve McLean Tony Burke Cori Cusak ■ courteous service HI take the other alternative II SPORTS to work...school...or play HI Editor Chris Starkey —'I Contributors H Ride Kitchener Transit HI Brad Lyon Jacqueline Slaney Serge Grenler Derek Merilees By Route or schedule information II UL may baobtainad at tha DESIGN AND ASSEMBLY Duke Street Terminal Production Manager Cori Ferguson or by calling information Assistants Susan Wallace Kitchener Katßlos Transit at 741-2525 Systems Technician Paul Dawson Copy Editor Wendy Beaton Frances McAneney Contributors Dudley , II OiMa Dave Wilmering DwightYoakam PHOTOGRAPHY Manager Andrea Cole Technician Paul Mitchell Graphic Arts Debbie Hurst Contributors Cori Cusak A Phillips Paul Mitchell ADVERTISING Manager David Mcintosh Classifieds Christine Foisy Production Manager Karen Pollard Production Annie Quong Ad Reps Elizabeth GaMn Scott Vandenberg Jos6e Tulipano National Advertising Campus Plus (416) 481-7283 CIRCULATION AND FILING Manager William Penny Eight-month, 24-issue CORD subscription rates are: 520.00 for addresses within Canada and $25,00 outside the country. Co-op students may subscribe at the rate of $9.00 per four-month work term.

STUDENT PUBLICATION BOARD OF DIRECTORS President David Wilmering Directors Sarah Hayward Craig Cass Al Strathdee Tony Karg

The Cord welcomes all comments, criticisms and suggestions from its readers. Letters to the Editor must be typed, double-spaced and submitted by Monday noon the week of publication. Ail letters must bear the author's full name, telephone and student number. Letters must not exceed 250 words in length. The Cord reserves the right to withhold any submission its staff considers racist, sexist, homophobic, libellous or in bad taste. The Cord offices are locatedon the 2nd floor of the Student Union Building atWilfrid Laurier University. Telephone 884-2990 or 884-2991. The Cord is printed at Fairway Press, Kitchener. The Cord is published weekly during the fall and winter academic terms. Editorial opinions are approved by the editorial board and are independent of the University, WLUSU and Student Publications. The Cord is a member of The Canadian University Press news cooperative. by Copyright ©1988 WLU Student Publication, Waterloo, Ontario, N2L 3C5. No part w———^——a——a——^V; of this publication may be reproduced without permission of the Editor-in-Chief. 3 THURSDAY, MARCH 17,1988 the CORD Glasnost works in Russia: Zamiatim

By Jim Lea management" in the electing of Socialism, argued Zamiatim, but managers, the establishment of self- rather of inconsistent and poorly "Democratization in society is the financing factories and multiple interpreted Socialism. soul of Perestroika." candidates in elections to positions "We are not trying to adopt - Mikhail Gorbachev in soviets or legislatures. The another system," he said. "We will Sergej Zamiatim, the Second diplomat stressed that sound eco- move towards better Socialism, Secretary of the Soviet embassy in nomic management should be the rather than away from it." Ottawa, spoke at Wilfrid Laurier rule in Soviet production. The attempt to couch Gorba- University on Monday night. chev's reforms in Marxist theories Zamiatim also noted there is a of societal evolution was evident in a While also discussing arms control more outspoken populace now that booklet available at the end of the and fielding questions on topics newspapers are discussing topics talk. It was entitled "October and ranging from Chernobyl and the that had long been shrouded by Perestroika: the Revolution Con- Soviet Union's policy towards authorities. "There is so much tinues." religious groups, Zamiatim's talk information that is available now," centered on the striking economic he said. The very popular news- In the course of Zamiatim's talk, it was and social reforms underway in his papers are investigating the nation's difficult not to believe that country. historical "mistakes" in looking at Perestroika is the charting of a such times as the iron-fisted rule of pragmatic, progressive course that Glasnost, Soviet leader Mikhail Joseph Stalin. will benefit the people of the USSR. Gorbachev's new policy of "open- Increased democratization and the ness" was described as stemming "Perestroika does not come easily tolerance of open dissent counter Secretary of the Soviet embassy in Ottawa, Sergej Zamiatim, spoke from severe economic problems in ..the Soviet leadership differs in two of the strongest criticisms that at Laurier on Monday on ecomonic and social reforms in the USSR • the 1970'5. "One of the mightiest opinion," said Zamiatim. He claimed Western democracies make of the Cord photo by Eric Beyer powers in the world arose to replace though, that the Soviet leadership Soviet system of government. It backward Czarist Russia," said was "unanimous in their belief that remains to be seen if the reforms will Zamiatim. But by the late 1970'5, Perestroika is desirable and inevi- not suffer internal political defeat. economic stagnation had increased table." WLUSU: starting over Marxist-Leninist countries have By Erika Sajnovic drastically. There were "shortfalls Gorbachev isreceiving opposition historically not taken too kindly to due to use." wasteful and inefficient in the Soviet Union from more political and economic reform, as The Wilfrid Laurier University Students' Union board of directors for The USSR had plenty of resources, conservative politicians who feel that Czechoslovakia found out in 1968 1988-89 met March 6 and 13 for preliminary meetings. just wasn't using them properly. it his reforms may be too radical. and Poland in the early 1980s. March 6: Zamiatim, country was Said "The When asked if Gorbachev was The resignation of Business directer Gesa Wisch was received by verging on a crisis." straying from Marxist-Leninist Asked if Glasnost would continue President-elect Karen Bird. Wisch explained that time constraints with after Gorbachev left politics, Perestroika, the Soviet govern- principles and giving up on Social- academics would prohibit giving her position on the board the time that Zamiatim noted that there were ment's policy, and Glasnost are ism, Second Secretary Zamiatim not she feels that it deserves. "new laws which enforce democracy intended to end stagnation and surprisingly said, "No." Gorbachev Also at this meeting, the three new Vice-Presidents were welcomed to and enforce the more flexible conservatism in the Soviet Union. the board. Vice-President: Finance Chris Gain, Vice-President: Student is, as with other Soviet leaders, very management of the economy." Activities Murray Jose, and Vice-President: Marketing Heather Francis "We want more openness in every careful to not appear to be drifting Perhaps the most honest comment join Bird, Executive Vice-President Wendy Watson, Vice-President: sphere of life," said the Second towards a western style capitalist about whether the reforms will work University Affairs Jill Archer, and Student Publications President Chris Secretary. Economically, he spoke democracy. The economic crisis in was summed up in the diplomat's Starkey in completing the Operations Management Board. The of the "extensive democratization of the 1970s was not a problem of statement, "I hope so." President of the Bricker Street Graduate Student Society, the final member of the OMB, has yet to be elected. March 13: Setting up of search committees, announcements of important dates and general information dominated this meeting. WLU senate forum Bird informed the BOD that from July 20 to 24, Laurier would be hosting the second annual Canadian Student Services Conference. Last By Earle After the candidates speeches the Doug Morgan, Jonathan Reilly, and Scott year outgoing President Dave Bussiere, Executive Vice-President Tom floor was opened for questions. Williams, took part in the debate Mcßride Vice-President: Finance Donald Blane attended the The most heated discussion took and If you were passing through the organized by the Student Senate conference and a proposal which was accepted by the review place over the proposed plan of submitted Concourse last Thursday, you would Caucus. Mike Morse, the other board. Part-Time Studies to begin offering have witnessed the last election candidate, did not participate in this put motions for dates of by-elections and the Annual ofArts degrees to students Watson forth debate of the school year—Student forum. Bachelor Meeting. A by-election will be held October 13 for a Music who take the required number of General Senator Elections. The debate began with each Director and a Business director. February 16 will be the date of WLUSU seeking courses through College. Tele- There are five candidates candidate introducing themselves Tele elections for the year 1989-90. positions. Four College is a series of video tape four two-term Senate and the issues they saw the Senate Jose announced Oktoberfest would be held October 13 to 15 and courses shown on TV Ontario and candidates: Anna Jakubowski, Scott dealing with the coming year. Winter Carnival from January 14to 21. Jose named Brenda Lewis as Roger's Cable. also the Orientation Co-ordinator with Orientation week being September 5 Jakubowski stated her opposition through to the 11. to the plan because she saw full-time Committee chairmen were elected from the BOD. They are: students as "making a sacrifice to Scott Williams: Constitution and Operational Development (COD) come to WLU for 8 months a year." Doug Woodburn: Commission Services and Review (CS&R) Jakubowski called for a Federated Shafeeq Bhatti: Finance and Building Committee (F&B) College of WLU to be established to Damon John: Marketing Committee (MKT) identify graduates from TeleCollege Steve Guistizia: Student Activities and Entertainment (SA&E) as a means to note the difference The Priorities and Planning Committee (P&P) is comprised of the above between a full-time degree and a and Bird. TeleCollege degree. The next meeting of the 1988-89 WLUSU BOD will be held March 20 Morgan felt anyone should have at 10am in the Library Board Room. "an opportunity to a university Old WLUSU BOD: education," without uprooting their The 1987-88 WLUSU board of directors met March 13in the Turret to families to obtain it. approve money allocation for the Volunteer and Laurier Awards Dinner to be held March 28. Both Reilly and Williams felt if the An additional $2,525 was added to the budgeted 2,000. quality of TeleCollege courses were Mcßride said that last year the events cost 3,600 and the additional the same as on-campus courses, money was needed as more people were attending and the cost of food then there should be no discrimin- and liqour had risen. ation. Reilly noted that some pro- The Volunteer Dinner is provided for all volunteers of WLUSU, grams like the BBA's third year BSGSS and Student Publications. Laurier Awards are given to students could not be offered on TV because with outstanding academic and extra-curricular activties achievement. of group projects. Williams questioned the feasibility of denying TeleCollege students degrees when a full-time student can Less work restrictions receive credit toward their degree for taking a TeleCollege course. continued from page 1 $4,872 compared to $1,410 for other Other issues raised during the was hard to do. students, debate were student/faculty ratios, Dean of Students Fred Nichols In the last three years the number school closings, and library cut- was pleased with the announcement, of visa students at Laurier has been backs. In all three cases all of the "I'm really pleased with it because 1 decreasing: 128 in 1985-86, 88 last candidates felt the administration think they (visa students)really took year, and this year there are 55. needed to be reminded that WLU is a kick in the pants when differentia! Nichols said that five years ago here to educate students, not build a fees were introduced," said Nichols. there were close to 200 visa students Potential Student Senator Scott Morgan, fields questions at the surplus. Differential fees is the difference at Laurier. upon student senate forum last Thursday. Heated discussion centered The last day to vote in the Senate in tuition fees visa students pay International students was one of TeleCollege BA's, student/faculty ratios, University closing hours and elections is today, March 17, from 9 compared to Canadian students. the priority areas identified at the library cutbacks. Cord photo by David Wilmering am to 5:30 pm and again from 6:30 Next year full-time undergraduate National Forum on Post-Secondary pm to 9:30 pm. tuition for foreign students will be Education held last October. | MONTY 112 TlR iH*OF¥iINGON* *~11 | PYTHON jyl j THE OUTSIDE LOOKING IN? j|

t\ Br ￿ LEGAL RESOURCES DIRECTOR ~~1 Jn TUTORIAL DIRECTOR (S CDI Ift+h ￿ APPLICATIONS m v\ sMtjJt rl\l MAKOH loTn + winter carnival co-ordinator iN ￿ WINTER CARNIVAL COMMITTEE M Br7U AVAILABLE {(V RM IEI BPM ￿ BOARS HEAD COMMITTEE DUE MARCH 18 M V fiffl"} \ j\j % A CAMPUS }V JT C ~/,,, ￿ CLUBS CO-ORDINATOR 4PM X iff' vZ.yyonn 112 V\ iia i l YT WLU ￿ CAMPUS CLUBS BUS.MANAGER JN DIRECTOR W (' i'i baqKSOR* INTERVIEWS THE 1% X GUESTS ￿ SAFETY & EQUALITY DIRECTOR FOLLOWING V 1 sroJ/irps WEEK. |V

fi DAVID

* v WILCOX S thinking about finals? S ATjj 2 j

| C(A today/ V. v 1 IPf I £J 0 | | £jf MARCH 17th J

~ THURSDAY, MARCH 17,1988 the CORD 5

LEARN A LANGUAGE...LIVE A LANGUAGE... RCMP raid Cour»e» offered level*throughout the rumoured «n ye*r. FRENCH in Paris, Lausanne, t For • frw brochure, and rn.il thi.»ppll- Neuchatel or /vmooise.Arnboise axnplert artton formto TRAVEL CUTSoffice. , your GERMAN By Eric Beyer G. According to Bezner when the Peter's Building and in room 3C-15, in Cologne or Zurich Name: person was told that the supposed Spadey Hall. SPANISH in Barcelona or Madrid AHHr««- ITALIAN in Florence Rumours of a provincial raid of raid had never occurred, he said, Bezner said that students can regional "Toilets must be flushed." TRAVEL CUTS GUELPH TRAVEL CUTS WATERLOO universities have proven to sign out software overnight provided University Centre University Shops be justthat—rumours. Plaza Lorna Storm, a Guelph student that the student won't copy it, and University of Guelph 170 University Avenue West and writer for their student news- that they do not have a history of Guelph, Ontario NIG 2WI Waterloo, Ontario N2L 3E9 According to the RCMP Head of 519 763-1660 519 886-0400 the Federal Enforcement in paper The Ontarion said thatrumors copying software. The borrower Section a Kitchener three universities of Guelph raid were rampant. She leaves their student I.D. card. The M TRAVEL CUTS (Toronto, Hamilton, and Guelph) said people were frightened of being two most popular computer pro- had phoned requesting information "busted" for possessing illegal soft- grams for WLU students—in order kmmmmmmmmmemm GoingYburWay! preference—are on a supposed province-wide raid ware. Therumored fines for posses- of WordPerfect and sion on universities suspected of of illegal software changed, she Lotus (spread sheet). at possessing illegal computer software said, from $20,000 the beginning If the university suspects someone of the week to $50,000 by week's (i.e. programmes that had been of illegal copying, Bezner said that NOTICE OF OPEN HOUSE illegally reproduced). end. the person would be confronted. According to Storm said that a letter to the Bezner the university Last week unfounded does not protect anyone. SPONSORED BY THE ON-GOING STUDENT HOUSING COMMITTEE rumours editor in the March 15 edition of The were also circulating at that a WLU Ontarion stated that two "paranoid" Bezner said that the rumor could similiar RCMP raid had been physics students destroyed about have been started as a joke. If the OF THE CITY OF WATERLOO conducted on campus. 400 kilobytes of illegal discs, includ- rumor was started by someone with "If there was someone actually ing games, word processors, and a a vested interest, he said, then the graphing program. obvious choice would be a manu- committing copyright law infractions The letter's Tuesday, March 22,1988 was that facturer. someone would do something about conclusion students should MacGregor Public School-Gymnasium not take the A Act it," said Corporal Rick Harten of the rumours seriously. federal to amend the Central Street, Waterloo Copyright Act, Bill C-60, was intro- RCMP office in Kitchener. Harten - At Laurier, there are two areas 7:30 pm 9:30 pm said there have been no raids and duced last Mayand has gone through where can software be signed out by two readings. It is currently tied up none are planned. The On-Going Student Housing Committee is a Committee established students: in the first floor of the at the committee level. According to Laurier's Director by Waterloo City Council and is comprised of a wide range of community of Computing Services, Hart interests directly affected by student accomodation issues. Bezner, the only software that Laurier owns is purchased software The objective of this open house is to present information on the status in the public domain, and software of the On-Going Student Housing Committee and to seek comment and developed at the university. He said suggestions from Waterloo homeowners, tenants, landowners, studentsand that Laurier's policy governing the any other interested persons or groups concerning student housing matters. use of software is "very strict." Additional information relating to the above noted matter can be obtained WLU Security Chief John Baal by contacting the undersigned at 747-8757. also dispelled the rumors. Baal said that the RCMP do not have standing warrants, and for the RCMP to get a 'search and seizure' warrant they Brian J. Trushinski must persuade the issuing Policy Planner magistrate that a crime is being City of Waterloo committed. He said that, in a legal sense, there is a lot of "grey area" on the question of floppy disc copy- rights and for this reason alone there was probably no raid.

Baal also said that for a raid to the RCMP would need security to open the doors, and no BEYOND WORDS one has approached security. BEYOND WORDS Evidently someone from Guelph- Bezner would not give the name— BEYOND WORDS was recently at WLU saying that he desktop publishers inc. had witnessed an RCMP raid at U of Quebec dubbing policy slammed Resumes

MONTREAL (CUP) - Cinema original film can be shown, and for a hoc group. "Films like 'My Life as a students at Concordia University limited time. Dog' have such small budgets, they couldn't afford to dub that film in will be passing petitions at movie The students say that low-budget Transparencies French so it would never be shown theatre line-ups this spring to protest independent films will become a in Quebec." a controversial amendment to the rarity on Montreal theatre screens if It costs an average of $50,000 to Quebec Cinema Act. Bill C-59 goes into as sche- effect dub a film. Bill C-59 will force film distri- duled in June. butors to dub non-French movies Mainstream films will also be Professional Quality before the original can be shown in "It won't be worth it for distri- affected by the new law. Distributors Resumes and Transparencies! Quebec. If no French version is butors to dub certain films," said will be forced to release the same Andrew number of English and French- released, only one copy of the Noble, a member of the ad- dubbed copies simultaneously, or prove that the film will be dubbed in Bring your draft copy to the Second Floor Quebec within a certain time-limit. On February 18, the Canadian in the Student Union Building distributor of "Broadcast News", a movie which has received seven Oscar nominations, pulled it out of Quebec theatres in protest against Near-typeset copy is produced on a laser printer the proposed law. The movie was released again two weeks later when a french dubbed version was made available. Resumes $15 for first page, $10 for additional pages "It's important to realize that this isn't a protest against the language Extra charges for messy copy, rush sen/ice issue," said Noble. "The protest is Printing at 12C per sheet against what it does to cinema." "Montreal is building a reputation Transparencies forart but this amendment will mean $1.50 each, unmounted, minimum text that we will end up falling behind," said group member Anne-Marie Gelinas. "Distributors won't be inter- ested in bringing films to Montreal. This service is being operated on a referral basis by European movies won't come University Typesetting and Transparencies because of the dubbing costs and will go to Toronto and New York instead." WLU There's always something Student Publicatons Positions Open for Next Year cooking at Casey's. The WLU Student Publications Board of Directors are now accepting applications for the following positions:

□ Accounts Receivable Manager I- Vy Accounts Payable Manager v ] ,

MONDAYS - chicken OR steak Applications and more information are stir-fry - only $6.95 available at the Student Publications' office °nd Floor, Student Union Building or call 884-2990

— 1 Choice ■ Cracks

On being asked for bis opinion ofrock journalism, (' •JPlliilk\ Frank Zappa replied that it was people wbo (L ' 'lfs* who atn l tcl^t()r 7 THURSDAY, MARCH 17,1988 the CORD Copyright laws still burn grads

By Arman Danesh recourse. no such legal right, Bremer said. And even though the bill has This practice is so common that it

TORONTO (CUP) - Graduate already been passed in the House of is not questioned, he said. students are still in danger of having Commons, Bremer is confident the their work ripped offunder Canada's Senate can still amend it in graduate U of T Ombudsman Liz Hoffman new copyright legislation, the students' favour. said there have been no reported National Graduate Council says. "The particularcommittee (review- plagiarism cases of this type and TAMIAE'S CAR PUB RALLEY ing the bill) is the same committee there are no specific guidelines in NGC Chair Jonathan Bremer (that rejected) the drug patent bill," the University's Code of Behaviour says Parliament should double Bill THURSDAY, MARCH 311988 he said. "They are predisposed to to legislate such conduct. C- 60's three year statute of limit- standing up to the house." ations on prosecution for copyright "If a case was brought to this infringement. Bremer said cases of plagiarism office, the office would approach the The NGC, the graduate wing of are frequent, but very few are University as to legality," Hoffman the Canadian Federation of Stu- reported because of students' fears. said. The objective of the ralley is for a driver dents, thinks grad students should "If they report, they probably have more time to file suit or claim won't get their degree," Bremer said. "If it is a case of a professor and one navigator to complete a set route damages when a professor takes He said an increase in the statute printing a total work with no credit, their work and uses it as his or her of limitations to six years would morally we would have a problem in the closest required time. The hitch is own. allow students to finish their degrees with it," she said. "What we would before making complaints about have to investigate is the legality." that the navigator must decode a map of Bremer cited a Ph.D. supervisor infringement. the route and consume a 'beverage' at at Carleton who published a stu- Bremer said the Ontario Graduate dent's master's thesis in four Plagiarism is especially common Association, a wing of the Ontario every establishment listed on the map. journals. But the student, unaware in the sciences where professors get Federation ofStudents, has retained of the infringement until after the co-authorship credit for work done a lawyer to help students fight There will be prizes for the winners. three year period, had no legal in their lab, even though they have copyright battles. For more information and to sign-up, come Too many students to the Tamiae booth in the concourse March 21 - 24.

a problem at McGill Cost: $3 members $5 non-members

MONTREAL (CUP) -- McGill other Canadian high schools. This University has found a novel way to means Canadian students applying deal with the school's lack of Arts to McGill with an average under 70 professors: admit fewer students. per cent would no longer be con- A proposal passed by the McGill sidered for acceptance. Admissions and Scholarships Com- However, Arts and Sciences mittee will require higher marks from society president Moore said applicants in Arts and is to be ratified the university is taking the wrong at the next university Senate meet- approach to the problem. ing. "I think McGill is attempting to solve the problem of overcrowding

"There is a clear feeling within the overnight - if this is going to be faculty that student-to- teacher effective it must be one step in a ratios are simply too high and McGill larger process," he said. is facing a serious underfunding "Marks aren't the only way to crisis," Arts associate dean Martin judge a person," Moore added. Petter said of the proposal. Currently, the average students- The proposal would raise the to-teacher ratio at the McGill Faculty acceptance marks to 70 or 75 per of Arts is 23 to one. The proposed cent and would only apply to stu- policy would bring it down to 17 to dents from Quebec colleges and one. MUG

JOBS SHOTS. JOBS JOBS Canada Employment LSAT Centre For Students

GMAT The CEC-S staff will be in the Concourse, March 24,10:30 to 4:30 taking registrations Employment. Prep Courses for for Summer

235 King Street East, Kitchener Jun. LSAT 744-8151

Chocolate Mug Shot Coffee Mug Shot Jun.lB GMAT Hot chocolate hot black coffee Canada A Shot of Southern Comfort Shot ofSouthern Comfort Top with mini-marshmaltows Teaspoon ofsugar (416) 923-PREP (7737) Top with whipped cream 1-800-387-5519 A 8 the CORD THURSDAY. MARCH 17,1988 I THIS JOKE'S FOR YOU! I * J * * * * t I * * * * J I * * * t * * If your friends consider you to be a wacky sort of person, or if 4 * you're just downright weird in a funny way then the Cord needs J * help. The Joke Issue approaching and we £ * your Annual is fast

* desperately need submissions ofall types. Whether it's an article, *

* a letter, a survey, top ten list, or a goofy picture we need it * * -NOW! Deadline for submissions is Friday March 25, 1988 so J i * get your ideas down on paper and come talk to someone up here J * if you've got any questions J * } * £ * * $J *

* 1 * J * J * * * *

I Luncheon Special I I 6 slice (2 items) I

I 29 University Ave. E., Waterloo I (University near Regina) I I 886-2111 I

" andgetthesecond I pizza FREE!!! THURSDAY, MARCH 17. 1988 — the CORD- 9 Feds announcing better loans By Laurel Hyatt approach for the future," Crombie dent Loans Act. legislation, you have to look at the sters of Education, made up of the said when he announced the Meloshe said it could take a while broader government timetable," she provinces' education ministers, to

OTTAWA (CUP) - The Federal establishment of the advisory group. for this kind of bill to pass in said. discuss what ievel of funding the government could announce this If the federal government provided Parliament. The ministry's group is also provinces can contribute for grants "Whenever you are talking about working with the Council of Mini- and bursaries. month a restructuring of the Canada better summer job programs with Student Loans program to make it higher wages and more positions, according easier for students to use, the debts wouldn't be so high, said to the Canadian Federation of Stu- Macerollo. "It's always been the dents. position of the CFS that the best form of student aid is a summer Chair Tony said he Macerollo job." hopes the changes will include giving students more time to repay their Macerollo said he's disappointed loans, introducing grants and bur- with the stagnant funding of the saries, and giving more assistance Challenge '88 program given by for disabled and part-time students. youth minister Jean Charest. A Secretary of State official said The advisory group to Secretary Crombie "intends to bring about of State David Crombie was set up changes as soon as possible" to the last October "specifically designed CSL. Mary Meloshe, the head of the to discuss student loans," said department's Student Assistance Macerollo, one of the group's Directorate, said the program must members. have "more flexible repayment terms The group should make "imm- and greater accountability" to ediate changes to Canada Student students. Loans for the 1988-89 school year," The value of outstanding loans he said. the government guarantees for students totals more than $2 billion The CFS information officer, across Canada, Meloshe said. Catherine Louli, said "They're "That represents a significant complete looking at a overhaul of amount of money and federal invest- the student loan system." ment," Meloche said. "It's a ques- A change is needed in the way the tion of public money being well- government gives financial aid to spent." post-secondary students, Macerollo said, because the system is too rigid The ministry's advisory group is for students to repay their loans. made up of representatives from national student organizations. In statistics released by the "An exciting part of this whole Secretary cent of State, 37 per of committee is it's the first time ever students who negotiated a Canada (that there has been) direct student Student Loan graduated with a debt input into Canada Student Loans," of more than $5,000. The average said the CFS' Louli. Cheered on by her coach-Gory Jiffies - and her debt load was $4,796. teammates, Putt O'Blarney, Minister of Industry, Trade and The minister can make minor Technology appears shocked to have won M.V.P. in the "The Canada Student Loans Act 90th annual parliamentary sumo wrestling tournament. policy changes to CSL, said "I'm so undeserving" was her only statement according has served us well since 1964, but to reliable sources. Look for more wild and wacky stuff like Macerollo. But an overhaul will this in the Cord's upcoming joke issue. it's clearly time to reonent our require amending the Canada Stu-

jggfftb FARAH 'S POOD MART : ST; * Now Two Convenient Locations to Serve You. ■ ■ I Oil J IP\J Qjs(l 170 University Ave.,W. 65 University Ave., E. IU Across from McGinnis Restaurant Behind Shooters Restuarant Jmm OPEN: 8 am. - 1 pm„ 7 days a week 'FPk II OPEN: 24 hours, 7 days a week

CHADD'S I Sealtes, 2% Milk || \ POOR STUDENTS I QQ I 6 f °r: AA* BREAKFAST I '2 ■ I QQO| ■ 4 litres I J

Ragu Spagetti Sauce 1 \ j jc j Primo Pasta Saturdays and Sundays I■ assorted flavours ■1 10:00 A.M. — 2:00 P.M. I $-4 89 I QQA I Bacon or Sausage, Eggs, Toast, H I ■ I Tea or Coffee, Jam, Juice U 500 g. J

I From our Deli: Bittner' S || I From our Deli: Gourmay's Black Forest Ham I Roast Beef I liinill ©£ m II per £2[ Cfc I Per Cfe jus ■ ioo g. OC# I ioo g. \0 I 6HOTEI9 WATERLOO HU L *___J 4 K!NG ST. N., WATERLOO (Corner of King & Erb) B^s] —_.——Mflny More lustore Features wodoosday, March 23, 1988. 10 the CORD THURSDAY, MARCH 17,1988 the CORD

The Ides of March

Once again we are struggling to find a gripping, interesting, editorial topic to entertain, stimulate and intrigue you, our readers. It has been said Cord editorials touch the pulse of the Laurier student body. We fear, at this moment, the patient may be dead. At best, the pulse is weak. We are sure, however, that this is only temporary and we attribute it to the month of March. Why? Well everyone complains about the February blahs, but university students are more commonly afflicted by the Ides of March. For a student the month of March may be the most stressful time in their entire life. Let's look at the stress factors. Academically: all of the work that you put off in the first term of your two-term courses is catching up, pre- registration and the frustration of closed courses has angered you, essays are due (and overdue), and exams are quickly approaching. Financially: it's been seven months since your last Babysitting Turret security regular pay cheque, you're tired of asking the folks for cash—combine this with Reading Week extravaganzas Two Saturday nights ago we drove through the parking lot on our and cash-flow wise even the luckiest of students are way to the Turret and passed a very prominent football player and his girlfriend feeling the pinch. strolling Comment along in the same direction. After waiting in line for a By Housing: March is also prime time for finding half hour to get in, we were more than surprised to see accommodation for September. If you are lucky enough this same football player and his girlfriend LEAVE the Debbie Hurst to be already set up, chances are you're scrambling to Turret. and find sublettors for the summer or preparing otherwise to Now we know they did not wait in line because we would have been ahead of and we they did foot the entire bill yourself. them, know Cori Ferguson not have passes because they would have had to walk Jobs: trying to find summer employment also weighs past us to get in. We also know that they are not seriously. Most of the Turret staff abide by the rules heavily during the migraines of jobs magical (contrary to popular belief) just March as the best and did not and they are not the we're talking wiggle their noses and ones about. There go early. appear in the Turret. There is are a select few who don't. only one way for them to have gotten in—through the Those who suffer the however, are those who The rules are there for a purpose. most, back door. They do not exist graduating. Though experienced to simply make people unhappy. It is are in terms of the Later that week we found out that the couple had ILLEGAL to allow entry through the back doors. The people who do routine March stress, many new pressures are added headed down to Wilf's after they left the Turret to stop it should also have been charged. They were breaking for the graduating student. Your university career is in at the Cliff Erickson show. When we passed by on the law. If someone from the LLBO decided to do what end it is our way upstairs the doors to Wilf's were locked and no nearing an and time to take that next step—the we did last Thursday night and had seen the people one was being let in. How did they get in? Figure real world. And for many that is a scary step, indeed. it coming in the back doors, the out—it's not too hard. Turret could be shut Up to this point most of us have not been tested (at down. This is not just fun and games, this is serious In light of the recent firings of Turret security stafffor business. least by our own unforgiving internal standards). We this exact reason, it struck us as very interesting that Some of the Turret staff also feel that they should have, since an early age, been protected by school. For the practise is still continuing. In an effort to back up have unlimited access to both pubs. That would mean graduating students, that no longer our suspicions we trudged up to the Turret last crutch is there. close to 80 people could come and go as they please. Thursday to keep an eye on the back doors to see What's more is the realization that the friends you how Now it wouldn't beany fun if you bring a many people came in. In total, not including on-duty couldn't friend have made over the past few with you, so double that to 160 people. capacity years will all be going staff and pub managers (who are the only Turret people is 506, Wilf s considerably less. different ways. Some, you will never see again; others allowed to come in and out the back doors), Need we say more. seven The present system of letting infrequently at best. people came in. people in the front doors doesn t work. We watched 29 people with coats Getting a real job is always Seven people in one night is a far cry from the days on your mind. It's on leave the building. One would expect last term when there would be lineups of people that 29 people interview time. For business students, it's finally getting waiting would have gotten in, but only to get in the back way. Security has five did. The front door improved but the staff couldn t let any that job you've been expecting. point more in because the Turret was is—it is still happening. already For Arts students, the realization quickly sets in that the overcrowded. Why? It was due to those who One of fired staff, inresponse to being asked wny entered illegally. B.A. stands for Bugger All. Visits to career services are it happens, said "well, you wanna help out your It is a vicious circle that must end somehow. mandatory and interview skills friends." One of the questions asked in the hiring Turret become more important staff have to be made aware that they interview is whether you would let your friends in if they too must obey than any course you have taken in three years of the rules. The firings are a step in the right It don't have I.D. Those who answer yes are not hired. direction. university. You begin to realize that you really don't has slowed the problem down but not ended it. It would You must answer no to get hired. By breaking the rules, know what you be a shame if plain-clothed security guards had to be want to do for the rest of your life. some people have, in effect, lied to get the job. hired to keep an eye on the existing security. Maybe you were just putting off the inevitable? There has been a lot of unrest within the Turret staff However if that's the only viable solution, then let's And if you're really into getting just since the firings. At one point they tried to organize a do it. bummed out, We re not upset that we have to wait to get Thursday night walkout. Realizing that they would be in line in, think of having to start repaying your student loans. nor are we that upset that a Lettermen's jacket immediately fired, several staff members seems But alas, one need not be dismayed. University is the hesitated. to let you go wherever you want Instead they protested by ignoring pub manager Terry whenever you want. time of your life. So slow down, take a look around—it Steen. What really upsets us is the fact that it is il- Childish behavior like this is uncalled for. legal. Because really doesn't get much better. Working at a small minority feel it is their God- the Turret is not a barrel of fun, it's a job, given right to jump and should be taken lineups, we all may be punished for seriously. If you break the rules their arrogance. Ah, the of and get caught you should be fired. If the offenders had its best times. Ah, its the worst of times. If the studentscan't be trusted to know the difference not been fired it would have only reinforced the staff's that between right and wrong then maybe they do need belief they themselves don't have to take the rules babysitters. opinions Editorial areapprovedby the Cord Editorial Board on behalf of CordStaff and are independent of the University, the Students' Union and the Student Publications Board. LETTERS TO THE EDITOR must be double EDITORIAL BOARD spaced, preferably typed and submitted no later Furlon Editor-in-Chief Erika „ o- Sajnovic, News Editor Eric Beyer, Associate News Editor Kirk Nielsen, Scene Editor Chris Starkey. Sports than noon Editor Cori Ferguson, Production Manager Monday of the week of publication. Michael Wert, Features Editor The is published during Maximum length of these Cord the fall snd winter academic terms. Offices are located on the suckers is 250 words. second floor of the Student Union Building, at Wilfnd Laurier University, 75 University Ave. W., Waterloo, (519) 884-2990. The Cordis a member of Canadian Univcersity Press and the Don't go over it or else we'll ® come your house Ontario Community Newspaper Association. Copyright 1988, WLU Student Publications. to No part of the Cord may be reproduced without the permission of the Editor-in-Chief. and burn you with red hot forks (sorry Matt). - THURSDAY, MARCH 17, — 1988 11 the CO.RD- So much for Cord percentages

The articles in the Cord con- taking nothing away from the fine Question cerning the Faculty Survey of the job that the 1987 Icebreakers did. Library are most interesting. As any LETTERS TO THE EDITOR But consider this! Some people "researcher" should know, when had sit-down Icebreaker interviews publishing results ofa survey, it is of last year, which were very formal realized our strategem tor writing to utmost importance to state at the with numerous serious questions. the Cord was a compulsion to share, of theWeek Myself and others also had sit-down beginning of the reporting of a survey - in our opinion, a valid issue. If we By Paul Mitchell back from his recent world tour the number of questionaires distri- interviews —sitting on a chair on top had wanted results, we would have of two stacked tables, with our heads buted, and the percent of those charged the administrative corridors Seeing as we've paid for John Weir's trip to Australia and questionaires returned. Nowhere in through the ceiling (ceiling tile yelling huge obscenities, pounding South East Asia where would you like to send him next year? the articles are these important removed), while singing our favounte doors until we were satisfied. "research" figures mentioned. So songs. My interview also consisted However, we chose to express our much for the percentages reported of wearing my track pants on my views in the Cord. by the Cord. head for a short duration. I know, So Alan Auerbach, we apologize the joke is on me for doing this shit, Richard Woeller for wasting your valuable time read- Library Staff - Documents right? O.K. you got me! ng drivel that snivelling, unlettered Editors Anyway, my question is how can note: Unfortunately the students submit to the Cord because sample size (N—4o) was left on Icebreaker hopefuls be compared if the we feel powerless in the University's light table on production night. Also these two distinct interview styles democracy. Unfortunately, we don't. the questionnaire was distributed to are used? Answer: The only thing in Also we would like to commend Eastern Mongolia all faculty members. common these interviews have is you for gaining free advertising space Harry Walter and Friend the underlying question: "Do you to the WLU Presidents Club and know someone on the Icebreaker WLU Development Fund, an ex- Reader thanks Executive Committee?" That's what cellent idea, well done! really counts. Why not scrap the & To Security Chief John Baal: we security staff interviews and have candidates fill sincerely apologize for attacking out afi application detailing their your parking practice (if it is your I'd like to take this opportunity to friendships with someone on the truck), if indeed your vehicle could thank the Turret Security and staff executive. This would save a lot of be utilized as a secondary resource who were working last Thursday time! for a student emergency (highly night. Because of your good In terms of constructive criticism, commendable planning and excel- judgement and assistance in getting the interviewprocess should be con- lent foresight) and, if you have con- me down from the Turret and to the ducted by a few selected profs, who tributed to the fund allowing for free Cover him with hair and hospital, further complications were would obviously be more objective. parking anywhere on campus. If put him in a cage with a avoided. As it turned out the chest Until this happens, Icebreaker hope- these are the reasons, we retract horny gorilla pain and shortness of breath were fuls should start buying beer for the our letter with regrets of our ig- The five Horny Gorillas not caused by my heart, but rather Icebreaker Exec, at the Turret and norance. by inflammation of my lungs and pucker up for a kiss on the cheek- However, we have two chest wall. Please accept my sincere below the waste! suggestions. Why not print a special thanks and gratitude. I'm feeling Chris J. Camirand security permit for security members much better now. 3rd yr Bus Rhonda Monaghan to avoid further confusion. Secondly, to replace half the faculty and stu- dents with security officers, turning Laurier into a police state, would be Wilk a hetero! ludicrous, since the purpose of our Readers are not excellent administration would be Dear Editor, defeated. Besides, the sale of parking In response to Svend Robinson's permits would fail to make a profit. recent confession as to his homo- Whistleblowers executive of the Lan Boltz sexuality, the A guided torn of Poland by Jerzy James Howell Political Science Assoc. would like Konieczny Dear Editor: to here and now confirm its hetero- V.P. Finance and Randy "Macho We were thrilled if not ecstatic sexuality. This is not to be construed Man" Savage when we saw our "little red pick-up Icebreakers be to imply that there are heterosexuals Hons. Polish truck" article had been elevated to on the executives of all campus the generous stature of serious ready to pucker clubs, but only to mean that there topics, vandalism and alleged are heterosexuals in all walks of life. student/prof dating in last weeks This isn't a letter to mourn the Paul Wilk Special Guest Comment. fact that 1 wasn't chosen as an President, WLU Poli Sci Assoc Of course we were somewhat icebreaker last year. 1 am the first to P.S. If there are heterosexuals on dismayed at the attack on our integ- admit there were a lot of people the executives of other clubs, we rity as whistleblowers, however we more qualified than 1 was. Also, I'm suggest they join us in our admission.

(Genius) Disney World and Busch Gardens Wile E. Coyote Huey, Dewey, and Louey By AD Dunn pizza stand, and therefore, it may not be worth his 3rd yr. Mary Kay Cosmetics while to travel this enormous distance in order to eat. If Wile E. has money, why doesn't he purchase Wile E. must believe that the odds of catching the food products? Roadrunner are great enough to outweigh the benefits of travelling 100 miles for food. In Wile E. issue 2 (Is Wile E, really hungry?), we Note: Wile E. is capable of speeds in excess of 100 mph, established that the Anti-Christ is truly hungry. In Wile but he is not able to continue such extreme speeds for E. 4 (where does Wile E. get money in order to long periods of time. purchase Acme products?), we proved that Wile E. made money through scenery painting. If the above statements are in fact correct, why doesn't Wile E. buy a hamburger in order to curb hia hunger until he catches the Roadrunner? 2. DIET OF THE ANTI-CHRIST To Dryden, Ontario to ride the A small percentage of cult experts believe that Devil moose worshippers throw up frequently, due to a hormonal K.D. and the Recline deficiency which can be traced to improper eating Hons. Pharmacy habits. Linda Blair adheres to a rigid meal plan to ensure her evil health. Perhaps fresh, raw roadrunner meat is the only substance that Wile E. can digest in his complex Anti-christ metabolism. This would explain Wile E.'s weekly compulsion of destroying the bird. 3. BASIC MORAL PRINCIPLES Wile E. is a coyote that stands up for what he believes in. He started chasing the Roadrunner before most of us were born, and he'll probably keep chasing him (her?) long after we are dead. Oh sure he could go out and buy some boil-in-the-foil cannelloni, but his rigid moral code prevents him from doing so. To Dayton, Ohio to solve NCR's Wile E. is an Anti-christ with heart. He will continue marketing problems

his weekly pursuit until he succeeds, or dies of star — Team 8 vation. Wile E. is an Anti-christ we can all look up to. Integrated Case Three possible explanations

1. RESTAURANT ACCESSIBILITY The Anti-christ is situated in the middle of a large dessert basin. Wile E. is 100 miles from the nearest War. The Oxford English dictionary effectively with belligerents and purge defines the word as meaning "a quarrel, the world of its various ills. In a recent usually between nations conducted by interview Rychard Mills, a noted col- FEATURE force." lector of WWI writings, stated that this This century has seen two massive particular war became "the most critical and destructive wars that have shaken event of the century" for, as far as political and cultural foundations on a literature was concerned, it came to By W. K. Penny global scale. Of these, WWI represented have "a direct influence on writers the single most cataclysmic event con- producing material after the war." sunset came to represent more than fronting western civilization. The years simply the beginning and close of 1914 to 1918 came to symbolize all that Mills, who researches the period and another day. They became another was wrong in a society intent upon its literary contributors, stated that source of horror to the men for, as Mill destroying itself. Emerging from the post-war poets such as Stephen explained, "at dawn the first attacks blood-soaked battlefields of the Somme Spender, W.H. Auden and Isherwood would commence while at sunset raiding and Ypres, however, came a literary were "all shaped in their perceptions of parties from the opposing side would tradition of the soldier poet whose work where the 20th century was headed by begin their rounds." The familiar Poppy documented this period in all its 'terrible certain of the soldier poets." flower came to symbolize the spilt blood beauty.' What has emerged recently as a of the dead springing up everywhere on Poets Wilfred Owen, Siegfried result of such concerns over the phen- the battle-scarred reaches of the •Sassoon, and Rupert Brooke are only omena of war and its consequences has Western Front, particularly in Flanders. three of the namesassociated with what been a noticable increase in sales of In 1922 T.S. Eliot, after observing the has lately become a renewed interest in related subject material. A number of effects war had upon inhabitants of literature from the 'Great War' period. the city's booksellers claim that requests London, wrote of their disillusioned These writers chronicled events related from the general reading public for condition in his poem "The Waste to the war and were influential in stirring WWI poetry and prose have increased. Land": the consciousness of men against the Some attribute this rise in popularity to idea of belligerency as a noble cause. a growing reading audience conscious Unreal City, The barbarism engaged in during five of the literary value of such works. Under the brown fog of a winter dawn, years of conflict resulted in the sort of Second hand bookstores including "The A crowd flowed over London Bridge, so many, futile death struggle 18th century poet Miscellany" at 82 King street west, and 1 had not thought death had undone so many the Earl of Rochester echoes in his "Second Look Books/' both in (11.60-64) "Satyr Against Mankind:" Kitchener, become a collector's haven for materia] dating back to the period of the Great War. Which is the basest creature Man, or Beast? Birds feed on Birds, Beasts, on each other prey. Mills, commenting on the period's But Savage Man alone, does Man, betray: war poetry, states that he does not it Man undoes Man, to do himself no <. ood. believe that is simply themes of death (11.128-32) that interest readers. There is "a horror accompanying life in the trenches that becomes more of a linking theme in literature than death." Soldier poets Central Europe became the war's deadly were presented with ironic situations, hunting ground and brought into Mill states, that "broke down Victorian question man's claim to a rational and preconceptions of war and destroyed civilized nature. the conventional poetic images writers Second Lieutenant WES Owen, Despite its horrible consequences, had been using for centuries." Manchester Regiment( 19 16). politicians and statesmen have always Images from nature, for instance, Photographer: John Gunston insisted upon war's ability to deal took on a new significance. Sunrise and Poets ofthe Great War The first few days were like lying in a boat. Drifting, The western world had fallen spiritually drifting, 1 watched the high sunlit windows or the and culturally as a result of the war and firelight all that was left of the land for its that flickered and glowed on the ceiling when the hospital inhabitants was blighted and sterile. ward was falling asleep. Outside the a The war poets became chroniclers of late spring was invading the home-service world. Trees the events which lead to such states of were misty green and sometimes I could hear a human disrepair. blackbird singing. Even the screech and rumble of Different poets had their own manner electric trams was a friendly sound; trams meant Rupert Brooke, 1910. Photographer of expressing and recording the war as safety; the troops in the trenches thought about V.H. Mottram they viewed it. Included below are trams with affection. With an exquisite sense of my hand to touch the excerpts of poetry and prose from the languor and release I lifted If I should die, think only this of me: work of Owen, Sassoon, and Brooke: narcissi by my bed. They were symbols of an That there's some corner of a foreign field immaculate spirit - creatures whose faces knew That is forever England. There shall be nothing of War's demented language. In that rich earth a richer dust concealed; from:"Memoirs of an Infantry Officer") A dust whom England bore, shaped, made aware, Wilfred Owen (killed in action near Gave, once, her to to Ors, France, on 4 November 1918) flowers hue, her ways roam, claimed that there was no honour gained A body England's breathing English through death on the battlefield. of air, Washed by the rivers, blest by home. Fulfillment in life through dying for one's suns of country became the old lie: "Dolce et And think, this heart, all evil shed away, Decorum est/Pro patria mori" ("How A pulse in the Eternal no less sweet and honourable mind, it is/To die for Gives one's fatherland"). 1917 somewhere back the thoughts by England In Owen wrote given, in the opening stanza of his poem Her sights and sounds; dreams as entitled "Anthem for Doomed Youth": happy her day; And laughter, learnt offriends; and gentleness, In hearts at peace, under an English heaven.

Siegfried Sassoon at Garsington, 1922(Diaries 1920-1922) Writings of these poets and others of What passing-bells for these who die as cattle? the Great War period has become a -Only the monstrous anger of the guns. definite area of renewed interest for Only the stuttering of rifles' rapid rattle both scholars and the general reading Can patter out their hasty orisons. public alike. Plays such as John Gray No mockeries now for them; no prayers nor bells; Rupert Brooke (died May 1915 of and Eric Peterson's Billy Bishop Goes Nor any voice of mourning save the choirs,- dysentery and blood poisoning on to War and, most recently, The shrill, demented choirs of wailing shells; troopship destined for Gallipoli) never Stratford's production of the Owen- And bugles calling for them from sad shires. (11. 1-8) lived to experience the horrors of the Sassoon story Not About Heroes Western Front. He became one of the indicate a revival of substantial Georgian poets who succumbed to the consequence. In 1985 "Poets Corner' at Later, Siegfried Sassoon (1886-1967) war before his writing had time to reflect Westminster Abbey in London, England would write of his experiences while in its evil designs. One of the author's 1915 unveiled a dedication to the war poets of hospital in England recovering from a poems entitled "The Soldier" is probably 1914-1918. This comes almost seventy wound received at the Front: the best known of his works: years after the deaths of many of these writers. THURSDAY, MARCH the CORD 17,19Q( 14

If you're eligible for a degree or if sible to make our affordable import automotive values avail- easy it is to finance any of you're currently enrolled in quality imports even more afford- able. Like the Optima. A car these Passport vehicles, we've cal- a graduate program, then you're able for you. that gives you all the benefits ol culated the equal monthly also eligible for this special We'll give you an addi- German engineering without payment for each base model, financing offer from Passport tional $500 off the already low the financial burden of German And we've even based our International Automobiles. base pnce of any Passport vehicle, prices. And from Isuzu, the figures on the highest interestrate Passport understands that We won't ask for a down pay- legendary first carmakers ofJapan, currently available from college graduates don't often ment. And we'll give you one of the spmted I-Mark and the rough GMAC. Subject to GMAC havebig budgets to work with. So the best financing plans available, and ready Pickup. approved credit. Your dealer may we're doing everything pos- On some of the best To show you just how sell for less. tßased upon manufacturer's suggested retail pnce for 1988 hase model Optima and l-Mark XS as of March I. 1988. Licence fees and any applicable taxes extra. Includes $500 rebate and freight. /Vices subject to change without notice. Dealer may sell for less.

WHITBY TORONTO MARKHAM ST. CATHARINES WATERLOO THURSDAY, MARCH 17, 1988 the CORD 15

The 1988

/ • • -iTjyTvirTr"—-*.

-i 't^^ffW^^IWIWMWMWWPW^ 1' ?^kp»GP ■■■ >■• ■■■• / , • h

— So the bottom line really drivingyour own new car. r— — is the bottom line - you could For more information,call Value Leader XS Pickup be dnvmga German-engineered the toll-free Passport Answer msrp $8,750.00 $11,053.00 isuzu pickups available Optima, for instance, for as Line 1-800-263-1999.Or visit a Less College Grad Rebate 500.00 500.00 °" c ble little as $229.73 per month or Passport Dealer near you. Plus Freight 345.00 345.00 3r Ipcc* Full tank of gas N/C N/C Vehicles to be svflilsblG Pre Delivery Inspection N/C N/C It all adds A 112 April 15,1988. up to an out- [• ■ TOTAL $8,595.00 $10,898.00 l//\SSKI lit' I Monthly payment # based on I I \VI\% ■I Standing oppor- I■ maximum term of 48 months*. $ 229.73 $ 291.28 tunity to be Wk INTERNATIONAL AUTOMOBILES *Monthly payment based upon 48 month GMAC finance contract at 12.8% annual interest. Actual monthly payments may vary from dealer to dealer and with changes in GMAC financial rates.

BELLEVILLE MONTREAL QUEBEC CITY TROIS RIVItRES HULL classifieds " Typist available for reports Fast,accurate Is your life lacking Room to sublet, May to typT^l etc. lEBM-A letter Quality word pro- Personals d Baffled by the Augustats9 Ezra Ave. $150 ; reckon? ACCOMMODATIONS Computer with le ter cessmg Resumes, of the a month whjch jndudes essays, mysteries Universe? int er- Rates, theses, Call asDirinq youna utilities. Huge back yard, business reports. P^ Ck Happy 21 st birthday Terry. Psychiatrist/Existentialist Room in two bedroom laundry facilitiesclose. Call P ' Dhics charts etc. extra. Call D,ane, It's spring-Don't be chilli She |ley. Free estimates, apartment available from May 747-2232. r^fn 576-1284. anymore! This week's Special: the - August. Fully furnished « « Maj-Lis Meaning of life, half price, including T.V. Rent negoti- |Il|^C serious inquiries only, able. Close to Both MISCELLANEOUS "™" mJLM U. LUKE: You are too sexy for 747-0629. universities, beer store, * words. liquor store and grocery An introduction service for WATERBUFFALOES: POLITICAL Science XO Love ? — or M.J. KENNY It'sthisTuesday, store. Call Karen students, friends & lovers, Thankstoall whocameout Association, 4th Year " ~ 746-4156 anytime. Student-Faculty : 7 with dinner included, just rational alternative to Friday to the Brunswick dinnerwill the We dig pig. let me know whatyou want, noisy bars, drunken parties. House. We set a new be held March 30 at You re so strong an we ~ : Chadd's Dining Room, and I'll burn itforyou. Love, „ Nonprofit, confidential. record: Everyone made it wantyou&you&you & loveyou. your M.V.D. We p.o. Box 8081, Substation backto Waterloo!! Aspecial Hotel Waterloo. Cost you — XO Wendle and pg | won - t te u my bQ y_ you! Yes, all four of London Ontario, N6G thanks to all those who $13.50. Get your tickets " to in our home is r —r friendsifyoudon'ttellyour live 2bo yacked outside of the bus. from Helen in Poli. Sci Graham and Greg: girls summer. Common rooms office or from Paul Wilk. for doing the lunch Between Thanx finished. — Scholarship: Central WATERBUFFALOES and — Call now. 746- thing... universities. Mortgage and Housing Marketing Club Members: ATTENTION all French- & XO Rent. - Love Wendle LOST FOUND 0310. Reasonable Corporation Application Sorry the St. Patrick's day Spanish club members ;—; —r —; forms available in the party has been cancelled. elections for next year's Batman, Chivalry definitely LUXURY HOUSE for rent. Graduate Studies Office. executive will occur on if we 4 isn't dead. Let us know Black and white gloves lost (April) May-August. min. Application forms must be WATERBUFFALO Trivia: Thurs., March 24, 1988 at repay the favour. — to W.L.U. newly can Marc h 2in the Atrium or walk received by the appropriate Last answer, Rodney the our Year End party (Faculty Distress. island Damsels in MacDonald House. If renovated with departments by March 21, knife thrower. This week: Lounge, 8 pm) Watch for — kitchen, track lighting, : found, PLEASE return to 1988 and in the Faculty of Aliens visited the earth and advance nominations in Dear Chris, Your bear does and pine finish, 5 | nf o . Booth. cedar Graduate Studies no later made clones of Fred your classes, or see one of not miss you anymore. He sauna. Only bedrooms, than March 29, 1988. Flintstone. What was the this year's executive with has been partying in U tie lCk any suggestions. Qp??oQi only' thing the clones could Think Toronto and Kingston and Accommodations 884-6781, MikeM l 'L 884-1296 or s Y about the advantaqes of he enjoys his new life. You 884-2332. TYPING ' beino involved'

will have to prove your # worthiness to get back. Student - 4 bedroom him WANTED, FOR RENT 1 1 It all starts March 21. TRI accommodation — within 2 condominium on Bluevale Typing Essays and CjP M" WI.B J 1 CAPTAPHI min. walk of Laurier. For St., Waterloo. Sublet, May resumes. Paper supplied. m. — Sept. Phone Chris to August with option to Reasonable rates. Close to Canadian Federation of lam a very lonely prisoner 744-1676. take over the lease in universities. Call Donna at University Women, KW, will in need of correspondence September. $800 Month 888-6308 anytime. hold their March meeting HUUbiiMUwnil c, Mr wainwantfd- March 17 and friendship. I will answer tiu_ p|us ut||jtjes - on Tuesday, March 22,1988 tor bept. i d-s any and ail letters that evenjngs Wordprocessing: Fast, at Hilliard Hall, First United I Bedroom Apt. or Mouse. may receive. Description of accurate will pick up and Church, King and William Laundry haciiities on myself is as follows: I'm a SUBLET (option to renew) deliver on campus. Will BARRIE ZWICKER, media Streets, Waterloo at 8:00

- spelling and minor . . white male, 36 yrs old, 5'11" n May 1 Aug. Large split make .critic and author will be p m Dr. Susan McDaniel foi 31. weighing 185 Ibsand have level upper duplex with a grammar corrections speaking about the relation- willspeakon"Changesand I Mary-hllen,p" »H4-bU/b.ca7R hazel eyes and brown hair. balcony. Heat included. 2 (English Grad) Call ships between the media Challenges to Repro- Please write to me if you LARGE ROOM for rent, bedrooms. Rent is Suzanne at 886-3857. and "intelligence" duction Surrogate mother- will, I'm sure you know the May - August with option $600/month and it is only agencies: Spies and the hood, abortion, test tube meaning of "loneliness". f or September. 15 minutes from campus. Typing Service: Waterloo Public's Right to Know, fertilization, discussed with Kenny Hazlett #153-144. $i5O/month. Negotiable. Call after 6 p.m. 741-9385. location, Reasonable rates, Thursday, March 17, Arts j n the context of new P.O. Box 57 Marion, Ohio Call Francesat747-21590r Don't pass this by, call! Lecture 113, U. of W., 7:30 reproductive technology." Call anytime,' 744-6447. 43302 884-2990. p.m. 5 Mature Students \ WLU 75 Years of 4 | Student Publications I or Older j 5 fEnjoy an exciting summer overlooking beautiful Lake Huron, 100 yards from some of the best windsurfing Positions Open for Next Year 5 and beach activity in Ontario. We're located in Goderich, i\ 35 minutes from Grand Bend. 5 We're looking for bright, energetic students to join 112 our team from May to September to work as waitresses/ j wa,ter s - bartenders and kitchen help. No experience a 4 j The WLU student Publications Board of Directors are 4 » needed We pay wage plus hps (bar staff t noW accepting applications for the following 5 and waiter/waitresses only) and a lu% bonus ot wages it 0 you stay with us from May to September with no tk interruption of work. Hie gratuities our bar and dining 2 room staff share are the best in the area (if not in Ontario). Photo Manager Come join our team and work in one of the loveliest Keystone Photo Technician ' and quaintest bar/restaurant/dining room and outdoor 112 Keystone Sports Editor d patio settings in the province. If interested, call or write: ' Keystone Residence Editor 2 □ Keystone Grad Photo Coordinator

' 4 OUBe attn ' WencUer □ Keystone Ad Coordinator t treet J

• . □ r , 1?* i Advertising Production Manager 5 Goderich, Ontario 112 v N7H 2K9 A|l positions are open to registered students of WLU 112 /ciq\ C24.4411 I t and cross-registered students of Uof W. Th& Iwm lIUUdC ti \ \ Deadline: Friday, March 18 at 4 pm. A Overlooking beautiful Lake Huron next to Harbour Park J in one of Huron County's , oldest buildings. Beautiful fJ A A j sunsets, good serv.ee, good } Applications and more information are food and entertaining event* jTDi J j available at the Student Publications' office £ \ 2nd Floor, Student Union Building or call 884-2990 She'll be cleaning all the windows, singing songs about Edith Piaf s soul, TheScene Van Morrison Rockabilly roundup with Razorbacks

By Steve McLean while balancing on it, slung out across his chest like a guitar, and Their debut album has just been even standing in an upright position. released and has already sold over Lead guitarist Donnie Cartwright 10,000 copies. They have appeared (no relation to Hoss or L'il Joe) was on Much Music. They have opened equally acrobatic, evencontributing for The Pogues and David Lindley. some lap steel guitar work on They are playing at Simpsons stores occasion. all over Toronto this week. They are With all of this frenzied energy The Razorbacks, and they were at being exerted during the first half, it Fed Hall last Saturday to play some is not surprising that there was rockin' music to a half empty house. something lacking in the second. The first single off the album, So They pulled out their bag of tricks Much Fun, started the night off and again, but the novelty had worn off set the tone for at least the first half and the band, while trying valiantly, of the evening. With lead singer failed to generate their earlier magic. Tony Kenny (resplendent in a The group is now playing every leopard skin suit just tacky enough night, and perhaps road fatigue is to look good in my wardrobe) starting to catch up to them. Either spouting off syllables at an that or they were saving themselves auctioneer's pace, the band kept up for their long trek in the following a hard to keep up with cadence. morning's Toronto St. Patrick's Day They roared through fifty minutes of Parade. Nevertheless, they still came material in the first set, mixing in through with a handful of winning their own compositions with tunes in overcoming the monitor memorable hits from the past, feedback which nagged them including Not Fade Away, The Way through their first few selections. 1 Walk and a rockabillied My Generation which worked Between The Razorbacks' two surprisingly well. sets, an aspiring young trio from The music, however, is not the Elora called The Tiger Sharks took Rockin Razorbacks:Balancing on their instruments is one of the many tricks the Razorbacns have perfected. only reason why The Razorbacks the stage for a half-hour to try their The animated stage show, combined with the overflowing energy of the music, had Fed Hall bouncing last have been garnering so much hand at a few rockabilly standards, Saturday night. Pictured above are lead vocalist Tony Kenny (standing on his guitar) and guitarist Donnie attention over the past few months. including Eddie Cochran's C'mon (actually his). Their animation on stage is Everybody and the Stray Cats' Rock Cartwright playing Cord photo by Cori Cusak reminiscent of a hybrid cross This Town. Apparently they had During the intermission, I had a clothes and he was featured on show wants to bear Cartwright's between Buster Keaton and Brian met The Razorbacks a few months brief chance to talk to Kenny as he Fashion Television with Jeanne children; 7) They have all been in Orser. While it looks ragged and back and had asked specifically for changed his suit and his guitar Becker; 3) They financed the release bands before but won't divulge any unrehearsed, it is obvious that these this opportunity to display their strings. The following ten facts are of their first EP by busking in the names; 8) As far as the Kurt boys know what they are doing. talents. While there was nothing highlights from our conversation and streets of Toronto; 4) They have Waldheim situation is concerned, it "Jailhouse Joe" Myke played his earth shattering about their sum up what The Razorbacks are all been together for a year; 5) David doesn't matter either way to them; stand-up bass from every performance, they did manage to about: Lindley really liked Cartwright's lap 9) Their album is now in its third conceivable position—on his head, keep the crowd amused until The 1) They are all from Toronto; 2) steel guitar; 6) The photographer pressing; 10) They don't mind being while lying on his back, with his feet, Razorbacks returned. Kenny's girlfriend makes most of his assigned to cover The Razorback compared to the Stray C.its.

In addition to jumping up on the speakers periodically, lead guitarist Donnie Cartwright (above) contributed some superb lap steel guitar work that added spice to the band's sound. Cord photo by Cori Cusak 18 the CORD THURSDAY, MARCH 17,1988 Scene Classic Corner By Steve McLean was down to sixty. 525, The Cars, The Cure, DEVO, The next step was perhaps the Forgotten Rebels, Madness, The I was six years old when I first fell most agonizing one I would have to Monks, Mental As Anything, Robert in love with music. During the take. Although they all rank among Palmer, The Piranhas, The Rezillos, summer of '73,1 played The Swinging my most favouritest (though times Motorhead, Silicon Teens, The Blue Jeans' 1965 single, The Hippy have changed since I was six, Modern Lovers, The Skids, Trio, Hippy Shake, so many times that unfortunately my grammar hasn't) Roxy Music, Teenage Head, The my Uncle Ken threatened to melt it performers of all time, I had to axe Vapors, Wreckless Eric and XTC, on me. He didn't, and that one Elvis Costello, The Jam, The among others. Eighteen records minute and 38 second recording is Ramones, The Hoodoo Gurus and remained to answer the roll call. still the most fun you can have (Ouch!) Talking Heads. It's their These next eight discs survived without using your hands. own damn fault, though. If they all the first three cuts, but were faced Times have changed since I was weren't so consistently cool, I could with stiff competition and, thus, were six. I now grow somewhat tired of an have picked out one album from relegated to second-string status. album if I listen to it more than once each of them. But, no dice. My They would still look good on your every two or three months. Since catalogue was now down to about record shelves, though. So long to my listening habits are so varied, forty, but some of my vital internal Bob Marley's Confrontation, John choosing my favourite albums was organs were starting to malfunction Fogerty's Centerfield, The Redskins' an excruciatingly painful yet due to stress. Neither Washington Nor Moscow enjoyable undertaking. The first As far as I am concerned, the (But International Socialism), U2's draft of my list included about eighty Golden Era of music was between Under A Blood Red Sky, Lou Reed's LPs. 1977 and 1982. Not surprisingly, a New Sensations, ÜB-40's Labour of First to go were compilation healthy percentage of the remaining Love, Tupelo Chain Sex's Ja-Jazz albums and greatest hits packages. LPs were released during this period. and The Mighty Lemon Drops' Exit collections by The Buzzcocks, However, I did not want nostalgic Happy Head. argument. Johnny Cash, The Damned, Echo sentimentality to cloud my choices. And then there were ten. Through The Beatles (White Album) and The Blind Leading The Naked and The Bunnymen, The Kinks, Therefore, I had to banish a number my flawed but reasonably efficient The Velvet Underground and Nico proved to be the Violent Femmes' Max Webster, Klaus Nomi, Gene of fun and inventive albums that system of elimination, I guess these were (with sincere apologies to Bob, final LP, but it stands as a strong Vincent, Ultravox, Hank Williams were maybe just a little lacking in are the favourite ten albums which I Mick, Pete, Donovan and Jim) the testament to their roughly-hewn Sr. and The Yardbirds. My inventory certain areas. A fair adieu to the B- own: two best albums of the 60s. genius. The Fine Art of Surfacing by The Midnight Oil made some bold Boomtown Rats propelled the Irish socio-political commentary on sextet to international acclaim. 10,9,8,...1, but have proven them- David Lindley was always selves to be men of action as well as acknowledegsd as one of LA's premiere words in backing up their state- session guitarists, but his EI Rayo-X ments. album also showcased his talent for Although they claimed to be cleverly combining elements of pop, Nobody's Heroes, Stiff Little Fingers blues, zydeco and reggae into one made at least one young man look pleasing package. up to them, as this record expresses The Specials' debut introduced a teenage angst and frustration more whole new generation to the joy of strongly than any other piece of ska music. vinyl I have ever encountered. The Great Rock TV' Roll Swindle You name it, it's got it. London featured the Sex Pistols and their Calling by The Clash is my favourite pals at both their best and their album of all time. worst, although which is open to That's all folks.

R R U I FOR OUR GRAND WEEKEND: I and Saturday March 12 THURSDAY, MARCH 17, 1988 the CORD 19 Something's Happenning

WHAT TO DO THIS WEEKEND: Z, INTRODUCING

MARCH 17 Matewan. —At the Princess Cinema the Canadian film I've Heard —Once again, at Midnight, Patrick MacGoohan stars The Mermaids Singing at 7:oopm. At 9:oopm is Hal as The Prisoner, on CITY-TV. So tune in, and see what Ashby's classic comedy Harold and Maude. adventures Number 6 gets himself into.

MARCH 18 MARCH 22 —Images In Vogue are performing at Fed Hall. —Hello, my name is David Byrne and this is my movie. It is called True Stories. It is playing at the Princess MARCH 19 Cinema at 7:oopm. At 9:oopm is a very good British ALL-U-CAN-EAT —David Wilcox brings his hypnotizing boogie to the film, Hope and Glory. Turret. MARCH 23 —The Princess Cinema will screen Tampopo; the film —Jane Siberry will wake up the Humanities Theatre at has been called the first "Japanese Noodle Western", the University of Waterloo. PIZZA will go at 7:oopm. —The U2 cover band Under A Blood Red Sky MARCH 20 where the Turret has no elevator and provide WLU & Salad Bar —9:3opm at the Princess Cinema is John Sayles' film with an "unforgetable fire". Japanese noodle film Special the Cord to ONLY $4.90 The Princess Cinema is screening ALL DAY! what has been called the first EVERY DAY! FREE DELIVERY "Japanese Noodle Western". "BESS Tampopo opens with a white-clad gangster, played by Koji Yakusho, PUMOig-S preparing to watch a film as his Open Friday & Saturday until 3 am UNIVERSITY SHOPS PLAZA set a henchmen up lavish brunch for Licensed under L.L.8.0. PHONE: 746-1220 he and his moll in the theatre. He expresses several strong opinions QIMIMiL about theatre-eating etiquette and our story begins. Dubbed a "ramen western" by its Tampopo's culinary skill, Goro is appetite kills his ailing wife, a dis- the main thread of creator, beaten up by Pisken and his asso- course on table manners, and Tampopo starts with its Shane-like ciates and he awakens on the floor enlightening ruminations on sex and lead, Goro, played by Tsutomo of Tampopo's restaurant. She asks food, money and food, and art and Yamazaki, listening to his partner, him to help her save her falling food as Tampopo and Goro give Gun, played by Ken Watanabe, read business and the film follows their their all to save her restaurant and aloud a book on ways to from progress to this end, aided by an find noodle perfection. appreciate ramen (Chinese odd assortment of characters who noodles), as they drive mild truck This delightful Japanese comedy impart their noodle know-how along Tokyo. The book's descrip- plays the Princess Cinema Friday toward the way. tions wet their appetites and they and Saturday night at 7:oopm, and are stop at a non-descript ramen rest- Cut throughout the film Monday night at 9:3opm. At 7:oopm aurant where they meet the proprie- several vignettes featuring the on Monday night the Princess is | finished your paper. tress, Tampopo, played by Nobuko white-clad gangster (who teaches showing The Pornographers a 1966 You've Miyamoto, and her bullying ad- his girl a kinky version of the egg Japanese "peeping torn" film. mirer, Pisken. After criticizing toss) a hungry husband whose Now let Kinko's puil the

TOP TEN ALBUMS FOR WEEK all-nighter.

ENDING MARCH 11 Stereo 94.5 cable 105.7

„ 1. Sisters of Mercy Floodland _ 2. Jazz Butcher Fishcoteque TOP NEW ADDS. 3. The Pogues If I Should Fall From Grace... Jerry Harrison Casual Cods 4 Firehose If'n Woodentops— Wooden Foot Cops On 5. Cowboy Junkies The Trinity Session The Highway 6. Tragically Hip Debut Ryuichi Sakamoto —Neo Geo 7. Eurythmics Savage 8. 10 Commandments Weird Out Kinko's business day starts early and ends late, so we're here when System Tackhead Tape Time 9. Tackhead Sound you need us most - before an early morning class or business The Triffids Calenture Look For: New Talking Heads. 10. appointment, after an evening meeting or seminar, and even on weekends.

Come by and see us. No "Closed. Come By Again" signs when you have a job for Kinko's. Entertainment Quiz

By The Backyard Escape Watching The Detectives

We're 24 a QUESTIONS: ANSWERS: open hours day, 6 days a week. 1. What was the name of Elvis Costello's first album? 2. Who starred as Mister Roberts in the movie of the same name? Hospital General 10. 3. Where did Ken Kesey get the title for his novel Sometimes A Great Eno Brian 9. Notion? Landesberg Steve 8. 4. What was the final event in the Twit Of The Year Contest. Entwhistle John 7. kinko's 5. Who played Adolph Hitler in the film The Producers? Kinski Klaus 6. 6. Who starred as Aguirre in Werner Herzog's Aguirre, the Wrath of Shawn Dick 5. University Shops Plaza II Ave. W. Cod? . . yourself shoot to 4. 170 University o song 7. Who claimed to have wrote the song Bons The Spider in 8 minutesi Irene Goodnight The 3. Waterloo 8. Who played Arthur Dietrich on Barney Miller? Fonda Henry 2. Phone 746-3363 9. Who produced the Talking Heads Remain In Light album? True Is Aim My 1. 10. What soap opera is based in Port Charles, New York?

k " THURSDAY, MARCH 17,1988 20 the CORD TOP TEN LIST TOPTENLISTTOPTENLISTTOPTENLIST TOPTENLISTTOPTENLIST

From the Home Office in Tilsonberg Ontario TOP TEN COMMENTS OVERHEARD AFTER THE TOP TEN WAYS TO GET INTO WLU AFTER 1:30am: BAD MIDTERM: By BOK and JOA TOP TEN REASONS TO WAIT IN LINE FOR THE TURRET: By Scott MacDonald 10. Wear skimasks and make a wire contraption 10. It was only worth 30 percent 9. Kidnap Super Cop, tie him up and steal his uniform Submitted by Jack Daniels everyone this one every year 8. Pole vault through the Turret's windows 9. I hear fails 8. only 140 percent on the final 7. Bribe the custodians with Torque Room Fish, to hide you in 10. Where else could you see walls sweat? I need really should have studied for that a garbage cart 9. There are no babes at Fed Hall 7. I as have gone out last night 6. T.N.T. 8. Half the people are going to the games room anyway 6. I may well When does Intersession start? 5. Disguise yourself as a pizza and head for the Cord. 7. I love it when people with passes laugh at me 5. late to drop the course? 4. Hide in the Boiler room until it's safe to come out 6. Rubbing up against strange people with is the only action I 4. Is it too wasn't there that week 3. Pretend your a "Land Shark" get 3. I guess I I think that would be on it 2. Wear a Lettermen's jacket 5. Cheers is not the same without Shelly Long 2. didn't Maybe they'll bell it 1. Ride a mule and ask if there's any vacancies for the night 4. There is women's world cup curling on the big screen 1. 3. 12:30 to 1:00 is when the place starts to peak anyway 2. It's worth the wait to hear Mony, Mony one more time 1.1 forgot my ID at home and I'm too embarassed to go back

FACTS WOMAN EVERY " INTERESTED IN BIRTH CONTROL v0 SHOULD KNOW ABOUT THE PILL papfgg

8 9 10 11 12 13 14 A

In 1960"The Pill" created a revolution. It is likely that no modern scientific development has had a more profound impact on society than the oral contraceptive. It is also likely that no other medical development has been more exhaustively studied, or more subject to controversy, confusion or misinformation. There have been enormously important advances j I in research and knowledge since 1960and the most widely used oral contraceptives today are quite different from the one that started the revolution. If you are concerned about contraception you should understand the facts. Some important facts about today's oral contraceptives 1. The oral contraceptive most often prescribed by doctors to- 5. Most oral contraceptives are virtually 100% effective in day contains less hormone in an entire month's supply than preventing pregnancy when taken as directed. They are the the first product contained in a single tablet taken for one day. most effective method ofreversible contraception available. j your best lor all 2. Today there are nineteen different brands oforal contracep- 6. As with any medication The Pill involves some degree of t host' tives available to Canadian women. They vary in hormone risk, although the low-dose products minimize this risk. (K'C'lsions . lornforiml< «. dosage ingredients. _ m , and Some are new. Others have been in „ There are certain groups of women who should not use The use for manv' vearsc'' Pill. Your doctor will advise you ifyou are in one ofthese groups. <)f ' 4 , . T'lko'idvintililC 3. Until recently, oral contraceptives involved taking the same 0„ , OP , , * > 8 " E teils ve studies.show that women over who smoke are strength of pill throughout the monthly cycle. The first ad- 35 n | i 4 . An vanced triphasic oral contraceptive, introduced three years greater risk and should not use The Pill. I UCIC. HI ago, varies the strength of both of the active ingredients in 9. There is evidence that who take The Pill women mav" receive . three stages. This permits a large reduction in hormone important beneficial effects including: dosage resulting in fewer minor side effects. rec }uced incidence of endometrial and ovarian cancer, 4. Here is a comparison of the effectiveness ofvarious methods (b) reduced likelihood of developing benign breast disease, of birth control.' (c ) reduced likelihood of developing ovarian cysts, Tuxedos

,i\ , • • • - • • Pregnancies per 100 women per year j i •] o i n j i i p _ (d) reduced incidence of pelvic inflammatory disease which A A A contraceptives Can lead tO infertility, I 1 Combination oral e vr Vf iJDCI Up L (e) reduced anemia due to reduced menstrual blood loss,

(progestogen only) „ ■ 2 Mini-Pill . , . , , , r (I)e reduced severity of menstrual cramps and premenstrual I 1-6 Intrauterine device (lUD) SVlldrOme. m our own t \\c earn•

- r[ 2-2° Diaphragm 10 The h. ea)th associated with the use of oral contracep- imH with spermicides ~. ( | ( )s tives is less thanf the health risk of childbirth except for 111X1 2-29 Aerosol foams women over 35 who smoke. taking any medication involves . Remember, a degree ofrisk. It 3 36 condom is iOCM llk iC I important to understand the facts so that you, with your doctor, 4-36 jeiiies and creams can make an informed m decision. ij\|~ | mmn 1-47 Supplementary information for women considering the use of wT no contraception oral contraceptives is available at your doctor's office or AA I C 6 °- 80 pharmacy. myl/IAI K 1 .1 I T I I I I I | | 10 20 30 40 50 60 70 80 100 \\ The figures (except for oral contraceptives and the lUD) vary widely because 659 SI. . people differ in how well they use each method. Very faithful users of the 1/ rVIU lIIIH various methods may achieve pregnancy rates in the lower ranges. Other This information is presentedby Wyeth Ltd., the leader inoral contraception, women may expect pregnancy rates more in the middle of these ranges. serving the health needs ofCanadiansfor over a century. ' 579~5420 1 The Report on Oral Contraceptives. 1985, by the Special Advisory Committer mi ReproductivePhysiology to the Ihvtth Protection Brush. Health and Welfare Canada. September 1985. 1 )pen Mon - Sal J I Wed.- l-'ri. until J - THURSDAY, MARCH 17, 1988 the CORD 21 The best for OMD? By Tony Burke When performers release compilation albums they are often signifying a change in musical direction from their previous material. The Best Of OMD, a collection of the band's most successful singles, shows a deterioration of musical skills and integrity that culminates in the album's only new track, Dreaming. Orchestral Manouevres In The Dark was formed in 1976 by two Liverpool lads inspired by the synthesizer movement laid out by bands like Kraftwerk. With Andy McClusky on vocals, bass, and key- boards and Paul Humphreys on keyboards and vocals, the young duo played high school dances using "junk" instruments, mail-order synths, and Winston, the ever- GrayCoach faithful taperecorder. After a few years, OMD found, to their surprise, that people were wiling to give them money to make records. And so, m Student, go home. Cheap. Electricity, their first single, was released in 1979. Student Union Info Centre, Student Union Building Like the self-titled LP that Telephone 884-2990 spawned it, Electricity is a mix of cold, electronic synthesizers and clumsy vocals, but it displays a great deal of potential, energy, and an haunting singles Joan of Arc and with spending three hours explaining A J attempt to write intelligent, insightful Maid of Orleans. The music why we call ouralbums Architecture /* - 1/ lyrics. OMD were beginning to get displayed warmth, emotion, and a And Morality or whatever", saw mgr m/ r*j/ critisized as a band that was "all sense that the band were truly release in 1985 and became a very machinery", to which Humphreys dedicated to their craft. This newer, popular but, alas, very commercial responded "We're more interested brighter sound was further album. The dance club hit So In up' in the sounds we make than the illustrated in the LP's third single Love got them an appearance on instruments we make them on, and Souvenir, a soothing ballad featuring American Bandstand and the teeny- there's so much more scope as Humphreys on lead vocal. bopper and dumb jock who didn't regards to sound in electronic music McCluskey and Humphreys put know OMD from DOA, FYC or than in using conventional together their next album, Dazzle Run-DMC. The lyrics had become MON & TUES instruments." Ships, without the aid of Cooper more love-song oriented and the 1980 was a year of major changes and Holmes. The result was a very arrangements were simplified into a for OMD. Their second album bizarre LP featuring such typical formula. In short, Orchestral LIVE ENTERTAINMENT!!! Organisation was released and "instruments" as a typewriter, a toy Manoeuvres In The Dark had featured two successful singles and... piano, and a Speak-and-Spell become less orchestrated and more SHOWTIME 9PM a human band! With the addition of machine. Looking back, Humphreys predictable. Martin Cooper on keyboards and said: "There's a lot of daft, crazy This style continued into their saxophone and Malcolm Holmes on ideas on it, some of which fail smash hit If You Leave from the WED. BOVS NIGHT OUT drums, the music began to take on a abysmally I'm sure." Yet the album Pretty In Pink soundtrack and warmer feeling. Messages gained contained two exceptional songs in brough them from warm-up band enough commercial acceptance for Telegraph and Genetic Engineering status to a concert headliner. It's too See what the band to embark on a concert which are not featured on the vinyl bad they had to sacrifice their tour of the UK. version of The Best Of OMD but are musical integrity to get there. 99$ With Organisation, OMD's present on the compact disc. Riding on the success of If You musical direction seemed to "Styles come and go and are mass Leave, OMD rushed out their latest crystallize. They expressed an aware- produced to meet the demands of studio LP, The Pacific Age which Lfi// gef you! lkcen«d under LLBO ness of topics that are familiar and the huge population and that is the enjoyed a minor success with the emotive without forgetting the Junk Culture." single Forever Live And Die, a MINGLES historical events which allowed these Holmes and Cooper returned with jumpy, tightly-arranged track which 743-623374^9™ modern fixtures to come into being. horn players Graham and Neil Weir was a significant improvement over 607 King St, W. On Enola Gay, a fan favourite also to produce OMD's finest album yet; Crush. Unfortunately, The Pacific featured on the compilation album Junk Culture. Tesla Girls and Age garnered less commercial Kitchener LP, McLuskey expressed this Talking Loud and Clear were big acceptance and OMD returned to direction in saying "The fact that the hits for the band but they were their soppy driuel with their latest aeroplane was called Enola Gay overshadowed by Locomotion, a single Dreaming. because it was named after the song that is in the Top Ten Dance Orchestral Manoeuvres In The pilot's mother—it's disgusting! Songs of All Time compiled by Dark began as pioneers in electronic Dropping bombs on top of people in CFNY-FM. With the success of music, using everyday devices to an aeroplane named after your Junk Culture, OMD seemed to have bring accross their musical vision. It BID mum!" found their niche but it was yet to be is evident in The Best Of OMD seen if they could top this milestone. package that they are falling deeper \W^ OMD's fascination with history continued into their third album, Well, they couldn't. Crush, named and deeper into the abyss that is Architecture And Morality and the simply because they "were so fed up commercial radio. Arts and Science Formal '88 at the Waterloo Inn 4 j Dalhousie University 1 H|p j lINICEF Tfc 2k 112 MBA 4 J Discover why the Dalhousie 2 S MBA could be right for you. J Children Wf V 2 MARCH 26,1988 j I | TUESDAY, MARCH ! Design featured A 22 unicefcard t j , 11:30 a.m. ~1:00 p.m. ! 8:00 pm £ Buy UNICEF cards & gifts, 112 i cT B 5 304 V rA j&s.. A I I i $IM t J J' 4 Dinner and Dance IM(. r j|#ifDalhousie Universityy Jl \T" Kl-C anada 443 Mi Pieasanißd 4 _ p Toronto Oni M4S2LB Telephone (416) 482-4444 K Halifax NOV3 oCOlia OR call toll-free 1-800-268-6364 [Operator 509) • V>siflEfiS" / $40.00 a couple Unfaithful

Hold me in your unfaithful arms. Let me forget for a moment. 1 close my eyes and accept the darkness. 1 close my heart to surrounding pain.

Trust has fled on broken wings, my smile has faded Along with your honesty.

Who is this young stranger Who holds me now so tightly? Is it the same soul 1 love. That held another in such a way? Dare me not, to believe it. Fracture And what lies ahead. For my young heart? Shall we Kill Her Softly Though you are trying courage- ously. He marvels at her beauty To fix the thousand broken In fleeting moments of reflection. pieces. Strokes her with discontent. The tracks will always show. Knelt at her alter In a naive, youthful age You cannot turn back Sleep in her bosom The weathered hands of time. And spit in her face. And nor can I.

He, You and I, blow smoke in her Instead, we must smile gently lungs At the memories we shared. Stamp her down smooth, And cry quietly at the mistakes. All for convenience and ease We have made. She's strong and hard as God could make By Marion Gordon But so fragile in our weak hands December 16, 1987

He says he loves her, clearly Most important in his tainted eyes But he puts so much chemical shit Into her stone cold veins Numb to all the feelings He treats her like a slut Makes her such a whore

But she never prostitutes herself She just seems to spin around and around At a hundred million miles an hour Passive and more then drained But As he shamefully slashes her If I could only sink darkened wrists into the darkness of her eyes those precious, mystic Oh! God I love her caverns How can he be so cruel holding shimmering reflec- Abusive to my mother tions His mother of a soft inner light This mother Earth? to the bottom I would go by MELANSON reaching ever farther for the secrets of her body and all the reasons I could find

and then explode like a diver on the surface of the water; Friend and Lover one who'd held his breath too He lead her back to his room. She knew this and let him proceed. As they got long closer she became more anxious; would anyone see them go in? What will everyone and who thought that he say? The moment came and she vacillated in the doorway. would die Jamien fought the urge to say something, itangered him that she made him feel like she was ashamed to be seen in any public place with him. The company was enjoyable, and later drift but those nagging doubts sometimes, more frequent of late, made him feel like walking in utter pleasure away all the time Will he be upset if I ask him to take me home, she thought. Did I lead him in this breathing deeper direction? Do I really want to do this, or is it expected of me. She so much wanted him the intoxicating fragrance to make the decision for her, then she could blame him and not herself for anything of the flowers of her mind that transpired. In decision is such an annoying idiosyncrasy. The lack of direction makes one but wallow in the endless sea of good intentions. Jamien wanted to make love to her, but now 1 look around me only if she was fully committed to entering his bedroom. Once through the doorthere at the empty cup of coffee would be no turning back. on a table with three legs The questions continued unabated. She searched her feelings for him. below a clock Chronologically he was youngerand probably would still be here after she moved on; upon the wall that ruled outany long term relationship. Self interest was placed firmly in the front of her life. She wanted freedom to maneuver, to flirt and carry on while avoiding the tick-tock. thoughts of indiscretion and pain that would accompany those actions if he was her lover. 1 breath in the stale air Oh damn what a game this was he thought. He was so uncertain if this was all the from the room I'm forced to right thing. He wanted to take her inside, the lights of the corridor became the peering live in: eyes of his comrades wondering and waiting to pry into his most private life. The it makes me feel like retching amusement was in the chase and hunt. Now the prey had been caught and the beast on the couch and dirty carpet must be conquered. which are covering my floor. In the seconds that past in self-reflection the decision was made between them. Guilt could be faced in the morning light. The door closed behind them. Izak Iyam Tony Karg The Poem (or how it didn't come to be)

I sit, staring, at a blank sheet of paper waiting for the words to envelop my mind.

Nothing's happening...

This morning when the sun crept stealthily under my blind and 1 awoke I decided to write a poem for you.

It's not working....

But when I put ink to pad my mind went blank and all those images I'd been carefully storing of you vanished.

Maybe I need a cup of coffee

I crumple the paper and toss it away because I know that you know how much I love you

You do don't you

A simple poem could not capture the love we share so instead of writing it down 1 think I'll simply crawl back into bed and show you.

anon.

Grendle

Standing in a corridor, Abstract forms go by, Snowballing on a Sunny Day Almost recognizable... And then fading, You are a mystery to me Into the great expanse of so near, things. so clear, so cloudy in the Hawaiian sun- shine

What hides behind that armour you call protective equipment?

Someday, maybe, if I avoid the trappings of Christmas we could go cross country skiing or rock collecting or build a snow fort in the field

Maybe, but only if it is a golden day in November and all the stars are shining and no hawks are flying

and only if you'll sit quietly on a January powder puff and drink my lemon gin and teach me to play hockey Sparkles Someone blotted his blue- lcf black pen All over the sky Above the city.

The harvest moon rises Looking like and island On fire, In the dark of the city night Where vast ink blotch Meets black of lake And blends invisibly J.M. Morley

Cord photo by Paul Mitchell Ifresponsibility I ifcvii s iri I frightens the daylights out ofyou, stop right here. But ifthe thought of HHPPPHHPH running your own Ijldft 01 \ business makes your mi heart beat faster, then read the small print. You're in for a pleasant

Wk y fJ TWhen vou graduate you can become just another cog in a big § M LlliM \ company wheel. Or you can be a wheel unto yourself. As a Maid Convenient " franchisee, you'll own and manage y'mr business m the f)ne hundred million dollar residential [ M I cleaning industry. The hours are long, but the rewards are high—significantly higher than with many other career options. What's more, you'll get a running start with our refined operating and planning systems. And you'll have plenty of help from an ever-expanding network i] I I I T LI LI of entrepreneurs—recent grads who have already made it at Maid Convenient K. We call this approach Supported Independence™ The choice is up to you. As Mark Twain said: ■ LVj I I 111 H "Thunder's good. Thunder's But it's lightning that does the work." If you've got the lightning, we've got the opportunity.

Iry ■ Pick up a Maid Convenient K brochure at your Career Planning & I l|j I L fll Placement Office, or contact us directly: Maid Convenient" Incorporated (1711 Mississauga Road, Suite (iO4, Mississauga. Ontario LoN 2W3 MAID Convenient Supported Independence™ Entrepeneurs Club Guest Speaker

JamesPhelan More- Thursday, March 17 5:30 pm T 11/f 112 Room 2CB Arts Building •

- Visit us Today (s/larch 17th 9am - spm

TM IVadcinark of Maid Convvnirnl* In,-.. n >..rat..ralrd SPORTS Study finds 500% discrepancy Women's athletics and WLU funding By Serge Grenier and CUP files women's counterpart. In the three cer just recently, while the men's unsuccessfully for funding for a full- Newbrough has suggested to the Parity in funding of men's and major WLU team sports that have squad has been in existence since time Sports Information Director administration to take the funding women's sports has not yet arrived both men's and women's squads, 1979. The men's squad is at present (SID) to lead a co-ordinated spon- responsibilities for football and at Laurier but according to Women's the men have a funding edge in a national powerhouse while the sorship drive. hockey because of their uniqueness. Athletics Coordinator Cookie basketball and soccer. Women's vol- women's squad has not made the The five year plan submitted by This, he felt, would make it easier to Leach, the gap is getting smaller and leyball has a higher budget allocation play offs during its existence. As the Department to the university achieve parity in budgeting for like smaller. than the men's squad because of its Leach stated: "If you perform, you'll administration again makes a re- sports. "If you would have asked the get the money." In making their case for equality in question four or five years ago, I Athletic Director Rich sports funding, Galasso and Holman would have said that there was an Newbrough states that the said: "If we believe this kind of inequality in funding", says Leach, women's soccer program has had activity is helpful and fun then it's "but things are getting better. We're bigger percentage increases in its the responsibility of those who are closing in." Over this time period, allocation than the men's program running the program to encourage the budget for women's athletics at and that much of the gap is due to women to try out." Leach, however, Laurier has had an estimated in- the funding formula for new varsity puts the emphasis on students get- crease of 150 per cent. sports. The current procedure is to ting organized to get a sports team According to a study by University pay for administrative costs in the together for competitive purposes. of Windsor professors Pat Galasso first year, half the operating costs in "If the dedication is there, we'll field and Marge Holman, the average the second year and cover full ex- a team." She claims that minor university budget for men's sports is penses in the third year. Women's sports have not been shut down at five times that allocated for women's basketball and men's volleyball, like- WLU because of budget con- athletics. The average budget of an wise, have experienced larger bud- siderations, but because of a per- ceived lack of and dedication administrator of men's university WOMEN'S ATHLETICS get increases percentage-wise than ATHLETIC DIRECTOR interest required to fund athletics, the study found, is COOKIE LEACH their better-funded counterparts. RICH NEWBROUGH the initiative. $555,282 while a women's counter- The Athletic Department does This year, there have been six part would manage an average of not benefit from a concerted pro- quest for funding for an SID as well sports teams that have had men's $102,955. status as the 'flagship' of the gram to obtain outside funding. The as for two additional full-time coach- WLU competitors but no women's program. Much of the difference at Laurier women's securing of sponsorships is left to ing positions, at least one to be filled participants. These are football, can be accounted for by the pre- Soccer is the sport where the individual coaches and teams, ad- by a woman. The goal of the hockey, golf, cross-country, rugby sence of the football and hockey women get the smallest comparative ding to the coach's administrative Department is to have eleven men's and track and field. On the reverse

— allocation. programs expensive capital- The OWIAA only gave responsibilities. In the past the and women's teams competing in side, tennis and figure skating have recognition intensive sports which do not have a official to women's soc- Athletic Department has lobbied OUAA and OWIAA action. women's teams only at Laurier. 1989 Hoopsters to return stronger

By Brad Lyon a well-deserved fifth place finish in first round of the playoffs by thirty here and there, but never stopping sorely needed after last season. the OUAA West division. points, putting a damper on some of anywhere long enough for the op- And last but not least (because It was the best of seasons. It was This was one of the oddest sea- the very positive things that emerged position to catch him. In the process, they are bigger than I am), the the worst of seasons. You could say sons any athletic team could have from this up and down season. he accumulated in excess of 20 Tillsonburg and Sudbury elements that the 1987-88 mens basketball experienced. The Hawks finished The past season presented a points several times, and in one of the squad can not be ignored, season was a season for all seasons. with a 5-6 record, a vast improve- plethora of pleasurable perfor- pocketed 33 points. For his efforts, because doing so would ignore It was a season that the seasoned ment over last season's dismal 1-11 mances for players and spectators he was rewarded with a placement three-fifths of the starting lineup. veterans led by example, and un- record, and the best finish for the alike. Tony Marcotullio descended on the second team OUAA all-stars. seasoned rookies played an integral squad in the past three seasons. At on the A.C. and other basketball Not bad for a rookie. The Demaree brothers brought a role in leading the Golden Hawks to the same time, the Hawks lost in the stadia like a little waterbug, flitting certain toughness to the Hawk of- Mike Alessio emerged as a team fense and defence, under the hoops leader in only his sophomore season at both ends of the court. Brian, as as a hoop Hawk, picking up the team captain, led the team by ex- slack when other players experi- ample as the most prominent third enced problems in adapting. year veteran on the team and Between Alessio and Marcotullio, younger brother Mike exploded on Beal Secondary School in London to the scene as an extremely talented was well-represented, and the po- sophomore. He had played only tential is there for even more Bealites sparingly at the end of last season, gracing the floors next season. Dave but deservedly earned and held the Kleuskens saw only limited action starting role this season. this season, but is expected to con- tribute extensively next season after If a"comeback-player-of-the-year- a year of experience with university award" was given, it would go to ball. Lorenzo Segato. He started the season on the bench, despite being But to give appropriate credit due a regular last season, and did not to everyone on the team would enjoy much early-season success on simply be impossible. Suffice it to the court. By the time the regular say, as coach Chris Coulthard has season rolled around, though, said so many times this year Segato was installed in his usual (whenever the team was victorious), guard position, excelling as one of it was the result of the team binding the steadying forces on a rather together, and doing whatever was unpredictable offensive squad. necessary for victory. The losses stemmed from a breakdown in that The Hawk Report Card: B overall "all for one, one for all" attitude. (it would have been an A if they had won in the quarterfinals.) Bench strength was an integral Next season's prospects: The factor in the team's improved play Hawks will go nowhere...but up. this season. Linas Azubalis excelled They lose only Ron Moravek (who is coming in as a substitute, and pro- transferring to Queen's), and have bably would have been a regular on some excellent potential recruiting Laurier, or many other teams, if he prospects, who could step in right had not played the same position as away and help. One of the rumoured Alessio. Paul DeSantis continued stops on the recruiting roundup is Cord photo by Ann Phillips his outstanding play from the end of Beal Secondary in London. We may last season and Ron Moravek gave as well buy out the franchise now. The throngs of spectators may no longer fill the A.C. but there is plenty of basketball action still taking place in the Hawks the defensive support We'd be the only university in the intramural hoop league. Our Cord cameras snuck this navel shot indunng the make-up games before playoffs and size off the bench that was Canada to have a farm team. began last Monday. - THURSDAY, 26 the CORD- MARCH 17,1988

Programme offers you the CUTS office for brochures I| chance this summer to work arid application forms. | in Britain, Ireland, Australia, Name: I New Zealand or Japan. Address: I This is your chance to combine work and travel abroad. Don't delay. Find out more, NOW! I TRAVEL I TRAVELCUTS WATERLOO CUTS GUELPH University Shops Raza University Centre Guelph 170 University Avenue West University of w 1 TRAVELCUIS GoingYourWay! SAN

FRANCESCO^-Just a stones throw away from WLU . ,

33 University Ave E Waterloo. Ontario

SANDWICHES PASTAS THE FLOOR | • GET l s : - s™„ Large Pizza and" order more I W M SAUSAGE GNOOCHI 3 25 112 ■ . 3 25 CI MEATBALL RAVIOLI oliv^CO...I^CQMI ■ O QQ cold cuTS 275 m Swe *< " e* um HC" - Only M - 1 si 60 6 $960 I SALAD S2 00 - Olives Soup $150. 20 7 $11.20 _ 2 S3 • 3 ITEMS •FOUR COKES 3 54 80 8 $1280 H / $640 9 $14.40 rnrr nei IUCDV PANZEROTTI S3 25 \ 4 FREE DELIVERY W 10. $1600 f ,„ a ,/ em S j

- .. EAT-IN •DRIVE-THRU —m m NIGHTS ONL^^Thurs«^it»Sat»2ZZ^UCE^nUßßET^746™^^^^^^J'TAKE-OUT "LONDON 1988 SPECIAL-STUDENT H MILTON l: : ndon >JB * Limited seats • No age restriction • Open for 1 Y ear * Reservation 21 days in advance for the "f*M going portion • Stand-By for the return trip* Departures Going Return Jk I W Until 30 June 88 A ■ 15 Sept. -11 Dec. 88 $299 $99 $398_ A ■ 16 Aug. -14 Sept. 88 $349 $99 $448

- 15 88 $399 $99 * Supplement for return trip with a confirmed THURSDAY, MARCH 17, 1988 the CORD 27 Hawks to lose vets By Derek Merilees year. It is very difficult to replace and lead the team. Calder, Application forms for In the world of professional sports, team leaders like all-star defenseman Aitcheson, and Marsden responded if a team finished with a respectable Eric Calder, Captain Dave to that challenge. Now those players' 13-9-4 record, won its final six Aitcheson, and sparkplug Doug departures have issued a similar regular-season games, and pushed Marsden. And if that isn't bad gauntlet to veterans like Greg Sliz, Residence Accomodation the number one ranked team in the enough, Coach Wayne Gowing must Greg Puhalski, and Brad Sparkes. league to the limit before eventually also deal with the loss of feisty 17- If the loss of five "front-liners" 1988-1989 goal scorer Scott McCulloch and leaves you, the Hawkey fan, in a veteran grinder Bob Dean. But replacements are precisely what Gowing needs, because all Housing those players have, according to are now available in the Office Gowing, played their final games as Hawks. "There will be no high ex- pectations for us next year," said Gowing. "We'll have to be more patient." Gowing isn't throwing in the towel before the season starts, however. "We've got some good potential recruits, and some players who al- ready attend Laurier," explained A limited number of spaces are WAYNE GOWING Gowing, with the sense of optimism GREG PUHALSKI available for students who qualify. bowing out of the playoffs, fans that is always present when coaches depression, then be considerably optimistic discuss "next year". severe state of would Things as as about "next year". Ultimately, the onus lies on the take heart. aren't bad appear But university sports are a dif- returning players to pick up the they to be. "It ballgame. The success of "last slack of those departing. The Hawks Consider the old hockey adage ferent out". Good goal- year" is only a minor factor in the are in a strikingly similar position starts from the net equation for optimism. Realistically, now as they were a couple of years tending and defense generally stops the crucial factor in assessing a ago. Losing CIAU all-star de- a powerful offense. And in the defen- WLU seems in Please inquire at the Housing Office team's chances is the number and fenseman Rob Whistle (who cur- sive department, quality of " returnees" to a club. rently toils for the St. Louis Blues) good shape. Despite Chris inconsistency in for further details. the basis of the latter criterion, and the nucleus of a team that won Luscombe's late On proved (witness the 1988-1989 edition of Varsity the OUAA title in 1982-1983, Laurier the season, he has Hawkey could be in for a rebuilding needed some "returnees" to step in continued on page 28 While the Hawks are away the UWO Mustangs still play Closing Deadline Tuesday March 22nd 4:30 pm up the final round of play, saw the in defeating the Windsor Lancers in Special to the Cord Axemen outlast the Victoria Vikings the semifinals, before throttling the 86-83 on the A-side. In the consola- Mustangs in the championship tion round, UFEI defeated Bishops match. CIAU Basketball Gaiters 66-57, and Saskatchewan As for the Mustangs, they had squeaked by the Carleton Ravens, advanced to the final encounter by University of Brandon Bobcats 75-74. ousting last season's CIAU cham- sharpened their claws on the Acadia pions, UQTR Patriotes in their semi- Axemen, as the Bobcats collected OUAA Hockey final match-up with a 3-2 overtime their second consecutive national victory. mens' basketball championship with The York Yeomen emerged from Despite their loss, though, the Put Your B an 83-68 victory over the Axemen the OUAA hockey finals in the posi- Mustangs will be accompanying the this past weekend in Halifax. tion they had occupied all season - Yeomen to the national champion- On the B-side side of the ledger, on top - with a 5-1 victory over the ships, as the second ranked team in M University H the University of Western Mustangs in Toronto on the Ontario conference. The CIAU I|§= Saskatchewan defeated UPEI Panthers, to capture the weekend. York received full finals will also be held in Toronto, the ConsolationTitle at the tourney. benefit for their home ice advantage, this weekend. Education M The OUAA West, represented by the University of Western Ontario Mustangs, lost any chance at being to Work represented in the finals, as the fi Mustangs were ousted in the semi- finals by the defending champion Bobcats, 73-65. The Mustangs had For You! B advanced to the championship side of the tourney with a 78-77 victory Our School of Business at Humber College had over Saskatchewan in their opening you in mind when they developed programs to game, avenging a 20 point drubbing skills to that Western had encountered last give you the knowledge and necessary year in their first match at the make you attractive to industry in less than nationals at the hands of Victoria. one year. setting Other semifinal matches, The demand for people who combine your proven P academic background with specific business wa knowledge and skills has grown so dramatically BOOKSTORE [V Loan To that we plan to expand our offering for BH HOURS: Start Your Septemeber 1988 to include: lad ■ Computer Programming Own Summer ■ Executive Assistant ■ Human Resources Management 8:45 am. - 5 pm. Business IJ3 ■ Small Business Management Mon. - Thurs. ■ Microcomputer Management |P9 - pm. 8:45 am. 4:30 ASK US HOW CALL THE ■ Systems Analyst Fri. YOUTH HOTLINE FREE Call (416) 675-5000 for more information or write to: The Registrar, Humber College 1-800-387-0777 205 Humber College Blvd., You could qualify if you are a full time student, 15 or Etobicoke, Ontario over and returning to full time studies in the fall. j Student Venture Capital is sponsored by the Ontario Ministry of Skills Humber Development in co-operation with The Royal Bank of C anada, the Ontario > s Ministry of ||| Chamber of Commerce and local ICO 1 skills Development Chambers of Commerce and Boards Alvin Curling of Trade. Ontsrio Minister 5 28 the CORD THURSDAY, MARCH 17,1983 Women's international volleyball to Meet the Coach: Smilin Don Smith come to WLU AC

Spccial to the Cord

Tuesday, March 22 will be a landmark date in the 1987-88 Laurier By Jacqueline Slaney sports year as the Athletic Complex will be the site of the Reebok Cup, an international volleyball tournament featuring four of the He may not be the tallest figure around but he can reaching his fifteenth year with the Hawks in 1980. women's world's top ten teams. certainly be called "a big man on campus". Where Aside from his coaching abilities, Smith teaches organizers Don Smith and Cookie Leach anticipate might you find him, you ask? Well naturally in the various Phys-Ed courses. Since the days of his arrival in Tournament some volleyball action, and the event (an anticipated sellout) may Athletic Complex! Yes Don Smith is perhaps one of 1970, when PE 100, 200 and 300 were the only physical great ever A.C. Dave "Tuffy" Knight's best Laurier recruits ever. education courses available, Smith has developed and sport the largest crowd at the Previously known as the Hyundai Cup, the tournament will feature the Despite a hectic schedule, "Smilin' Don" still manages taught many of the courses now in existence. Smith world's number-one Cuban team and the fourth-ranked squad to find time to be both a friend and an advisor to also held the title of Co-Ordinator of the Physical national students and athletes alike. Education Department from the time in which the new from Japan in the first match at 6:00 p.m. That confrontation will be by the seventh-best team in the world from the United States Born and raised in Southeastern Ohio, Smith grad Athletic Complex opened in 1973 until Bill McTeer followed trading serves and spikes with the tenth-ranked Canadian unit. uated with a physical education degree from Fairmont took over about the position four years ago. The play a gruelling round schedule, playing dates in State College in West Virginia where he registered on Smith presently is Assistant Athletic Director and is teams robin the in Ottawa and the medal the advice of his high school football coach Tuffy responsible for maintaining the A.C. as Facilities Co- Toronto, Waterloo and Kingston, semifinals in The Cup co-operative program of the Knight. It was through Knight that the famed "West Ordinator, which partly entails booking pool and gym games in Montreal six days. is a time room. Ontario, Quebec and Volleyball Associations, with sub- Virginia Connection" at the A.C. came about. and managing the tote Canadian It all began when Dean of Students Fred Nichols Smith finds that the most rewarding aspects of his sponsors including Holiday Inn, Citizen, Arima and Sport Canada. World-class like this are important for all as (another West Virginian product) recruited Knight, job is meeting diverse individuals and observing where tournaments teams, pool for the Olympics and world championships whoin turn enlisted the services of Rich Newbrough, to students venture to following their WLU experience. rankings and placement are on Smith, the strengthen Laurier's football program. Knight lured Smith is currently enthusiastic about the probable based tournament play. According to Cubans especially are taking events like the Reebok Cup very seriously Smith into tne fold in 1970 after Smith had obtained his implementation of an Honours Phys-Ed program at because Masters Degree at Ohio University in Athens, Ohio. Laurier, taking great pride in the existing academic and they are going through with their boycott of the Seoul Games this summer and their top-ranked is jeopardy each they play. Prior to his employment here, Smith taught at sporting reputation of WLU athletes. status in time Lakewood High School in Hebron, Ohio. When he first A sportsman himself, Smith enjoys badminton, Tickets are on sale at the A.C. office and so far 1000 of the 2300 pasteboards have been gobbled up. are $6.00 for came to WLU (then Waterloo Lutheran University), squash, fishing and cross-country skiing, and his available Prices his responsibilities entailed coaching basketball, golf sporting endeavors are but part of the reason he is students ad $8.00 for adults. In addition to the international matches, a game and acting as assistant football coach. These positions referred to "Big Man On Campus". Unfortunately for there will be Waterloo County girl's high school all-star at 3:30 to eventually overlapped into that of his present men's the ladies, though, he has been happily married to his start the program. volleyball coaching position which he took over upon highschool sweetheart since his second year of undergraduate studies.

"O" to remain Hawk key continued from page 27 1987 playoffs) that he can do the corps. netminding job. Backups Rob Up front, the Hawks' firepower is Dopson and Rob Beatty have added second to none, lead by top gunner experience this year- and this ex- Puhalski. And while the graduation perience can only serve to help their of Aitcheson et al will put a dent in play. Laurier's arsenal, Sparkes, Joel On the blue-line, the return of Curtis, and Tom Jackson all have Sliz, Mark Lyons, and Steve Handy, the potential to step in and take plus the moves of Bill Loshaw and charge. Brent Bywater from rookie to soph- Pre and post season speculation omore status leave Laurier with five is often like playing roulette- you pay solid defenders. And if Dan Marsden your money and you take your and Mike Duffy can maintain the chances. But Laurier's recent history high standard of play they exhibited suggests that even in rebuilding despite logging limited ice-time, years, Golden Hawk teams are more WLU will have a sound defensive than competitive. Cord file photo by Scoop OUAA Central Division All-Star Eric Calder (5) will not be leading WLU rushes up the ice next season. The veteran blue-liner is but one of several durable stars that Coach Wayne Gowing must replace in the off-season. by the ancUr^^

CD. imlTi KUiiiiMJl \ U ,|L s, - Fri 10 am to 9pm « RENTALS OPEN Mon j web[r \ ngQ Sat 9amto 6 pm | 2900 King St. E. p FAWVJeW / /""} VMARK a day or $3.99/week with Kitchener , / / lEE \ 3 I J CHARCOAL N2AIA7 / . L\ Lifetime Membership j ItZJ 894-5544 "

_^