274 RESEARCH Revista d’Etnologia de Catalunya December 2017 Núm. 42 Dying and passing away are not synonyms Social and cultural practices in the face of loss
here is a story by them and illustrate the transformation Dying and passing away are not syn- 1 Wolf Erlbruch in they reflect. onyms. The way a community copes which Death, seen with death reflects the way in which that as an amiable old Today we move in an anthropologi- community conceives life. Maintaining figure, explains to cal framework of flight. Santiago Alba awareness of the ongoing changes in the a duck that he has Rico (2017) makes this point when he rites surrounding death and the conse- quences of these changes, we explore always been beside her “just in case”. In states that there is a social, economic how a sample of informants from the Tcase something bad happened to her: and technological structure that not Vall d’Albaida (Valencia, Spain) experi- a bad cold, an accident, a fox. If any only treats the body as marginal but ence and feel about death. In traditional of those things happened, he would has left it behind. Because it is obsolete Valencian society, shrouding, wakes, accompany her. Today, it seems that and inconvenient; because it interferes and burials are social events linked to this dialogue with death and the idea with economic and cultural relations. passing away that transcend physical disappearance (dying). Together they of accompanying the person who dies It’s a matter of fleeing from everything form a collective act that helps people are being lost. Our article is the result incompatible with the predatory mael- to cope with the loss of a member of the of research in which we explore aspects strom in which we live. And the natural community. This idea is the basis for the of people’s concepts and experiences of processes of decomposition, ageing and, affirmation above. death, both those that have changed consequently, death are the opposite and those that have remained the same, extreme. This is why we flee from the Faltar i morir no són sinònims. Les from the early twentieth century to our dialogue with death and, by extension, maneres d’abordar la mort parlen de la time. In this period we can observe two its presence and even its existence. As concepció de la vida al si d’una comunitat. different approaches to dealing with a result, many authors2 have treated Sabedores dels canvis que els afecten en loss which coexist and conflict with the study of death as taboo. A taboo l’actualitat i atenent al fet que eixes mutaci- ons tenen conseqüències imperatives, each other in our towns and cities. This reflected in distancing oneself from it, aprofundim en les vivències i el sentir del is what the title means: passing away rejecting it, hiding it and denying it, procés de mort. Amortallar, vetlar i soterrar (faltar in Catalan) and dying (morir as manifested in general trends such as són fets socials que, en la societat tradici- in Catalan) are not synonyms because individualism, consumerism and the onal valenciana, no s’han limitat a l’estricta they reflect these two opposing models. consecration of youth. In the western desaparició física, sinó que han tingut la world death seems to be reduced purely capacitat de transformar el fet individual In the following pages we shall discuss de morir en un acte col·lectiu per a pair la falta. Eixa és la clau de l’afirmació inicial Raquel Ferrero i Gandia que guia el present article. VALENCIA MUSEUM OF ETHNOLOGY – VALENCIA PROVINCIAL COUNCIL Degree in Social and Cultural Anthropology from the Rovira i Virgili University, Tarragona. Currently she is working as the curator at the Faltar y morir no son sinónimos. Las Valencia Museum of Ethnology. She coordinates the Museu de la maneras de abordar la muerte hablan Paraula – Arxiu de la Memòria Oral Valenciana. de la concepción de la vida en el seno de una comunidad. Sabedoras de los Clara Colomina i Martines cambios que les afectan en la actualidad VALENCIA MUSEUM OF ETHNOLOGY – VALENCIA PROVINCIAL COUNCIL y atendiendo al hecho de que esas mu- Degree in Social and Cultural Anthropology from the University of Barcelona and a Master’s degree in Linguistic Assessment and Literary taciones tienen consecuencias imperati- Culture from the University of Valencia. Currently she is an intern in the vas, profundizamos en las vivencias y el Oral Memory Unit at the Valencia Museum of Ethnology. sentir del proceso de muerte. Amortajar, velar y enterrar son hechos sociales que, en la sociedad tradicional valenciana, no se han limitado a la estricta desaparición Keywords: death, Valencia region, life stories, traditional practices, modern strategies física, sino que han tenido la capacidad Paraules clau: mort, País Valencià, relats de vida, pràctiques antigues, estratègies de modernitat de transformar el hecho individual de morir en un acto colectivo para asimilar Palabras clave: muerte, País Valenciano, relato de vida, prácticas antiguas, estrategias de modernidad la falta. Esa es la clave de la afirmación inicial que guía el presente artículo. Dying and passing away are not synonyms RESEARCH 275 and simply to the destruction of life, to would confirm that shrouding, wakes The study was conducted in various what is radically opposed to it. It is even and burials have a wealth of meaning towns in the Vall d’Albaida county, associated with something dirty, to be and helped to transform an individual according to the guidelines followed avoided, which explains the technolo- death into a communal event designed in previous studies by the Museu de la gies placed at its service, the bureaucracy, to help one cope with loss. Death was Paraula – Arxiu de la Memòria Oral the aseptic atmosphere of hospitals thus a transversal phenomenon that Valenciana (www.museudelaparaula. and funeral parlours, the impersonal played a natural part in everyday life. es) at the Valencia Museum of Eth- treatment. This is “dying” understood What interests us is “passing away”, as nology. Our project is based on the strictly as physical disappearance. a collective way of dealing with loss, knowledge and experience of the not as a synonym of “dying”. generation born between 1920 and This coldness towards such an essen- 1940. The philosophy of the project tial moment in the life cycle suggests From the Ateneo in Madrid to is that by focusing on everyday life problems we should reflect on, and Vall d’Albaida: a gap between and emphasising direct knowledge of more so if we look at the phenomenon generations social experience we can achieve a more from a historical perspective, as we can In our research we propose an complex understanding of social and detect substantial changes in ways of approach to socio-cultural representa- cultural phenomena. One of the basic thinking about and experiencing death tions of death and the practices related aims of the Museu de la Paraula is to that affect different areas of life. In tra- to it based on a consideration of the determine the changes occurring in ditional Valencian society death was importance of the way in which cer- the Valencia region throughout the not hidden, it was a social event whose tain moments in the life cycle are dealt last century. However, the Museum’s theatrical nature provided therapy for with collectively and individually and work does not deal exclusively with the tension and distress it generated. the implications of neglecting or aban- describing change and verifying that it The wake helped to dissipate tension doning them. We are thus considering has taken place but also emphasises the and served to distract mourners from traditional knowledge as part of our way in which it affects people’s identity. grief so that they could assimilate it. heritage, arguing for its value and use- People talked a lot. And wept even fulness now and in our projection of We work with a qualitative methodol- more. And everything had a meaning: the future. Changes have undoubtedly ogy, placing subjects in their context social, cultural or therapeutic. This all taken place in ways of experiencing and drawing up biographical portraits echoes the observations of anthropolo- death, from an intimate context to an by using open interviews with those we gist Marcial Gondar (1987), who, in unfamiliar, external setting. In the first have identified as the “gap generation”. his study of traditional Galician society, part of our study, we therefore examine We use the term “gap” because we believe detects strategies that can contribute how people born in the first half of the that the people interviewed perpetuate to health in the community. Taking last century coped with and still cope the way of life, cultural world view and his comments as a starting point, we with the processes of death. social customs of their forbears, while their descendants are becoming increas- ingly disconnected from those ways of living and being. We interviewed twenty- seven men and women aged seventy to ninety. In each of the biographies of these individuals there is an episode involv- ing death which they have assimilated naturally and calmly in their lives. It is precisely this naturalness that has allowed us to examine in depth a topic that ini- tially seems delicate and has enabled us to gather significant, open and transparent commentaries on a social phenomenon, discussion of which is banned in contem- porary society.
First we extracted information from Interview at Atzeneta del Maestrat (2017). R. FERRERO AND C. COLOMINA the Ateneo de Madrid survey carried 276 RESEARCH Revista d’Etnologia de Catalunya December 2017 Núm. 42 out in 19023 and compared it with the dealt with it. Death has always been ing communion and anointing them map showing the interpretation of our a chimera. with oil. During the process the dying interviews. The results are shown here: person was helped to “die well”4. Only the intersection of these two moments Sifting through old times a few people witnessed death: family in history, what the survey says people At the beginning of the twentieth cen- members, the priest and, in some cases, did and what our grandparents say they tury it was customary for people to friends and neighbours, who remained did or still do. The idea is to determine prepare a shroud and pay for a funeral calm while accompanying the person. where we are now, without losing sight niche during their lives. The Ateneo The practices reported in the survey of the ethnographic data we have from survey describes cases in which the coincide with the testimony of our the beginning of the century. The peo- coffin was prepared and even tried, informants and with the first major ple interviewed could be the grand- together with the shroud. Today, over model of death identified by historian children of the subjects of the original 100 years after the survey, Elvira, one Philippe Ariès (2000): “domesticated” survey. To complete our study of the of our interviewees, born in Quatre- or “tame” death, which he situates in topic it would be interesting at a later tonda in 1926, tells us that she has the period from the Middle Ages to stage to interview the grandchildren of her shroud ready in a box, together the nineteenth century and defines, the interviewees we worked with in Vall with her husband’s. This little gesture among other things, as leaving space d’Albaida, i.e. people born between illustrates the acceptance of the social for awareness, accompanying the dying 1960 and 1980. In this study we have and biological fact of death with the person, who would prepare actively for also looked outside our own region, naturalness we have already mentioned death, as well as the fact that death was where we find practices which are dis- as characteristic of that generation. announced by natural signs, personal tant in terms of space and time but Although it may seem a picturesque conviction or premonitions5. similar in content. All this information, detail, it condenses a great deal of social together with various contemporary information, which we should not lose In many parts of England in the early theoretical contributions, serves as a sight of by relegating it to the status of twentieth century, people thought one framework for reflection on the two anecdote. couldn’t die while locks and bolts were opposing models for dealing with closed in the house. Consequently, death. In the Ateneo study, a section is devoted they undid them when they considered to the individual’s dying moments and the person’s death was imminent, so In connection with the survey con- preparations for death. When a person as not to prolong his suffering unduly ducted by the Madrid Ateneo, we was dying, candles were lit in front of (Frazer, 1944 [1922]). In the south of should note that it was drawn up the images of saints, bells were rung the Valencia region it is recorded that with the aim of carrying out research in the parish church and the priest some families used to burn rosemary, into customs and traditions at the key conducted various ceremonies for thyme or lavender to purify the air so points in the life cycle: birth, marriage the sick person: saying prayers, giv- that the house would be clear of any and death. The document provides an ideal framework for the compilation of data on rituals and beliefs related to funerals: the scholars who drew it up knew that practices related to death are powerful indicators of how our society is organised. Polish sociologist Zygmunt Bauman (2014) goes fur- ther, suggesting that cultures can be understood better if we consider them as ways of approaching and dealing with death. He states categorically that awareness of death is the primordial feature of human existence and even argues that history can be understood as a chronicle of changes that have taken place in the imagery of death and the ways in which humans have Thyme to ward off spirits. R. FERRERO AND C. COLOMINA Dying and passing away are not synonyms RESEARCH 277 evil being that might try to enter the shrouding the dead, asserting that it is soul of the deceased. an activity that must draw the person, call them to it: “Nobody needs to teach In the Ateneo study’s section on peo- you, it’s something you’re born with, ple’s dying moments no considera- the will to do it”. In the same vein, it tion is given to omens or portents of is interesting to note that the survey death, which are characteristic features reveals the idea that when shrouding of the “tame death” described by Ariès it was not right for “mercenary hands (2000). However, both in our inter- to touch the body”. This attitude is views and in the bibliography we clearly reflected in some of the inter- have consulted regarding traditional funeral practices in Spain6 there are views. Isabel, born in Guadasséquies reports of changes in the light in the in 1921, says: dying person’s room, shadows, sighs, “Back then they were dressed by the grinding of the dying person’s the whole village, the family. And teeth, wanting to be dressed in a certain nobody minded. I helped to dress way, the howling of dogs, the appear- my mother and father myself. I did ance of animals such as flies or owls, it for a lot of people. Because, as I certain dreams, folding bedclothes, Stuffed owl donated by José Balbino was saying, at that time I still hel- and certain sounds. Hermínia, born Rodríguez Díaz to the Valencian Museum ped, I used to go a lot. That was in Salem in 1943, describes purely of Ethnology. The appearance of an owl before I came here. But you didn’t physical changes in the appearance of near a sick person could be interpreted as a sign of imminent death (2017). mind dressing someone, helping. the person who is dying, in particular R. FERRERO AND C. COLOMINA Nowadays it bothers me more that a sharpening of the nose or ears. She strangers come, people you don’t also mentions changes in the colour of of the dead person’s mouth. Paquita, the skin, the way the person breathes who was born in Rugat in 1938, tells know. I was talking to a girl, a good and prolonged snoring. Lola, born in us that such traditional practices still friend, and I said: “Mari Carmen, Pinet in 1936, tells us that the dogs exist, despite new technology. When I’d rather you took care of me than barked when someone was about to an acquaintance died recently and the the people from the undertaker’s”. die and that crows flew in circles above doctor had to confirm the death, she It’s true, because, how can I say it, the house. asked for a mirror to see whether the they’d be more careful and look after patient’s breath clouded it. you better than people who do it Another respondent, Rosa, confirms professionally”. the howling of dogs as a portent of And now we come to shrouding, an death and in her testimony we have action that provides valuable informa- Her answers show the importance of details of death, the wake and burial. tion on the process of dying. We shall personal links and proximity as against Born in Bufali in 1943, she lives in begin with the question of who does it. the coldness of the professionals. Today the twenty-first century but she could It seems that at the beginning of the last it is common for people to delegate have been born at the beginning of century those responsible for shroud- responsibility to professionals, not only the twentieth century and been one ing were “enthusiasts” or people “with when dealing with death, but also in spirit”, pious people, people who were of the subjects of the Ateneo survey. connection with the sick, the men- Rosa is responsible for shrouding in fond of the deceased, close relatives tally ill and criminals. Bauman (2014: her village. She began to dress the dead or close friends. The majority of our 41) considers that acting in this way when she was sixteen, starting with her interviewees still use terms of this kind mother-in-law. Her father and her sis- to describe them. Rosa, who shrouds reveals an inclination, not necessarily ter followed the same occupation. We the dead in Bufali, is one of these bold, healthy or voluntary, to banish things shall be returning to her soon. Before decisive women who are important we consider unpleasant from our sight this, however, we should point out that for the village. She holds the key to and our minds. The underlying idea is the methods used to verify death were the church, tolls the bell for the dead that of eliminating everything negative very simple. At the beginning of the and carries the cross when the dead are from our lives and death is the most twentieth century it was customary to taken to be buried. Rosa emphasises obscene, most disrespectful negative place a mirror or a lit match in front the importance of being resolute about phenomenon. 278 RESEARCH Revista d’Etnologia de Catalunya December 2017 Núm. 42
Going back to the survey, respondents confines, blocking the corpse’s nose and acquaintances rallied round so that spoke about shrouding as a tribute to and tying the jaws together7. In Valen- the deceased person’s house was never the deceased and in some of our inter- cian villages shrouding used a similar empty, and all those affected by the loss views we find that this attitude persists. technique. The body was placed on a would always be accompanied. It was Reme was born in 1933 in Salem. Her sheet on the floor, as it was believed a matter of “never leaving the family husband was a dancer and when he that it suffered in bed. So that the eyes alone”, Reme from Salem points out, died his dancing partner asked Reme, of the deceased remained closed, a confirming what is said by Gondar as a favour, if she could shroud him. coin was placed on them until they (1984: 108) who considers that the fact She did so and later, when the woman set; so that the mouth remained closed, that the group forms and reforms until fell ill, Reme felt indebted to her and a handkerchief was tied round the chin. the corpse goes to the cemetery fulfils went to visit her to return the favour. The deceased’s feet were also bound a function similar to that of antibodies An example of reciprocity, an altruistic together, round the ankles, after the when they concentrate in a part of the way of closing the circle. body had been straightened, and the organism that is damaged. hands were crossed on the abdomen, James Frazer, in his classic The Golden sometimes holding a crucifix. All our Let us now turn to the place where Bough, explains how the Māori interviews confirmed this information the event occurs. When the deceased excluded from social relations and with very little variation8. Regarding was dressed, he or she was placed on communication all those who had the tradition of keeping the eyes closed, view in the coffin, until the time of the touched corpses, helped to take them we know there was a superstition that, funeral, at the entrance to the house, to their graves or simply touched if they were left open, the deceased so that those going along the street the bones of the dead (1944: 248). might be doomed to wander around could see the corpse, or in the room Although Rosa is separated from the in purgatory. It was also believed that in which the person had died. The area Māori by geographical distance and looking into the dead person’s eyes where the corpse was to be placed for lives in a different age and a different could attract the evil eye (Flores, 2000). the wake was cleared. Rosa gives a very culture, something similar still hap- detailed description of this: “They took pens to her today. In her village she is When the body had been prepared away furniture, vases, paintings, eve- tacitly forbidden to enter a house where it was time for the wake. The wake rything, because they were luxuries”. someone is sick or dying. People believe has always been considered one of the Or “because all those things suggested that her presence attracts death. And indispensable funeral rites for control- happiness”, as Reme from Carrícola there is some justification for this: Rosa ling grief. In our region, when a death comments on the plants. Moreover, if appears with her hands crossed over her was announced, relatives, neighbours the wardrobe had a mirror on the door, stomach and this is the position of the dead when they are prepared for burial. If Frazer were to return he would surely see this as sympathetic magic according to the law of similarity.
Shrouding means preparing the corpse for burial. Turning to another ethno- logical example, the natives of the Marquesas Islands used to close the nose and mouth of the person dying in the belief that he could be kept alive if they prevented his soul from escaping. The Itonama in South America used to close the eyes, mouth and nose of a dying person so that his spirit would not escape, taking other spirits with it. The people of Nias, fearing the spirits of those who had just died and identi- fying them with their breath, tried to The entrance to Ca Reme, where wakes took place in days gone by, Carricola (2015). keep the errant soul within its earthly R. FERRERO AND C. COLOMINA Dying and passing away are not synonyms RESEARCH 279 it was covered with a sheet. According therapeutic nature of the wake, not attended and the cross was simpler; and to Rosa, “so that people wouldn’t see only relatives but also friends and the third category was attended by the each other in it”. Frazer also comments neighbours, who took advantage of the priest and some altar boys with a small on the widespread custom of covering situation to face the problem of their crucifix. Respondents in the survey mirrors or turning them round to face own distress regarding death. Accord- and our interviews occasionally men- the wall when someone in the house ing to Norbert Elias (1987) the distress tion the difference between solemn died. It was feared that the souls of the caused by the death of others is related funerals for leading figures in the upper living, projected outside them as reflec- to the fact that it acts as a portent of classes at one extreme and funerals “for tions in the mirror could be carried off one’s own death. the love of God” for the lower levels of by the soul of the deceased, which was society at the other. One of our inter- commonly thought to roam the house In the section concerning burial, the viewees, Ana, born in Montitxelvo in until burial took place (1944: 233). survey deals with announcement 1940, makes the following comment: and burial. The burial was normally “People were all equal when they were Beyond the physical description of the announced by bells tolling. This not buried but they weren’t equal. As you places where the wake took place, and only told the residents that a death had might say: depending on the saint, the in line with the thoughts of Jack Goody occurred but also whether it was a man image will be finer”. She also mentions (1962) regarding this type of ritual, (three chimes), a woman (two chimes) the existence of a community coffin we consider the wake as a privileged or a child (a little bell). If the corpse was used for the really poor, and says that space which involves predetermined that of a child it was carried by children if necessary the local council would pay – ritualised – ways to channel feel- and if it was an adult the closed coffin for the burial. Ana’s contributions illus- ings, acting as support by the com- was carried on the shoulders of four trate a tendency that recurs everywhere munity for the surviving relatives at a bearers. “Death goes out by itself”, at all times, in a wide range of forms: moment of crisis. As we have already Reme from Carrícola tells us, suggest- funeral rites and commemorative cer- mentioned, at the wake relatives and ing that there were enough people for emonies are one of the codes through friends accompanied the deceased and one not to have to worry. The coffin which inequality is often demonstrated each other. The rosary was said aloud, was more or less luxurious according to (Bauman, 2014). with a prayer leader, who might be social class, black with decorations or paid in some cases. And people talked, white for children. If the burial was a From the church the funeral procession sometimes even joked and laughed. “better class” event, they paid the coffin went to the exit of the village to bid a last The guests were offered coffee, even bearers and some poor people received farewell and then the coffin was taken wine or chocolate and cakes, according money to bring candles and the table to the cemetery without mourners. In to the family’s social standing. on which the coffin would be placed, the survey respondents explained that, and even to cry. Elvira tells us that in after taking their leave of the deceased, Gondar (1984) suggests that the wake Quatretonda a poor widow called Car- people returned to the family’s house made it easier to overcome one’s loss; it mela hired her services at funerals to to express their condolences and that helped to overcome the tension gener- carry lighted candles to the cemetery. visits for this purpose continued in the ated in those most directly affected and In Beniatjar, Rafaela says that, if there days following the burial. The funeral all those who shared the experience. were not enough people to carry the service was held after eight days. Up to This occurred via different practices: coffin, they hired the poorest people this point the family would not have explaining, distracting attention and in the locality plus an old lady whose left home and during this period they releasing emotion. In the first case, job was to carry the table on which the obtained black mourning clothes. At more than pain, the person affected coffin would rest during the three stops home it was also customary to say the feels unable to explain what is happen- for the responses before they arrived at rosary for three days. There were a lot of ing and, in the course of conversation, the church. The poorest person in the visitors, especially women. The people people mention reasons, true cases, village would dig the grave. we interviewed recall all this informa- experiences, etc. that throw light on tion about the days following death the present situation. The fact that According to the survey, social class and some practices have continued the house was filled with people who was reflected in three types of burial: with very little change. For example, entered and left acted as a distractor for the well-to-do the ceremony was there are still people commissioned to from grief over the loss and the wake attended by the clergy with the finest weep or pray (sometimes for money) also served as a space to express that cross in the parish church; for the sec- and people still take their leave of the grief. Everyone benefited from the ond category only some of the clergy deceased at the exit from the village. 280 RESEARCH Revista d’Etnologia de Catalunya December 2017 Núm. 42
mass and didn’t go to the cemetery. They stayed at home, crying their hearts out. Weeping and wailing.”
And now we come to activities after the burial. The interviews provide signifi- cant new information about the days when they said the rosary at home. José María, born in Fontanars dels Alforins in 1928, tells us that when someone died in one of the houses near his vil- lage a procession of carriages went to the village. Everyone in the area went there and the following days they went to pray on foot. The expedition was often prolonged because many couples were formed at this time. Mourning can thus be a way of opposing death and redirecting our energies towards life. It can appear in very varied prac- tices but in the final analysis it comforts the living and reconstitutes the group in the face of death.9 We find another example of this in the testimony of Paquita and Herminia, who recall that wakes were an opportunity to do work like knitting, crochet work and weaving: “People didn’t sit there empty handed with their arms folded”.
We have a less agreeable description of the rigour of the grieving process from Lola, who asserts that “when one person died, everyone died”. Whether it was for close or more distant relatives, she spent
Finisterre S.A. funeral insurance company, Valencia Museum of Ethnology library (1945). R. her youth in mourning. There was a very FERRERO AND C. COLOMINA strict dress code for women: “dressed in black like beetles” according to some of our interviewees. Black dresses, heavy Mercedes, born in 1929, explains how wept so much, didn’t she? She must drawers, even in summer, wimples in those in Llutxent displayed grief during have loved him a lot.” or “He loved winter and mantillas on hot days, with the burial. her a lot.” But if they didn’t weep, scarves on their heads, replaced later by “People wept a lot at the burial. they’d say: “She didn’t weep much veils, “which looked nicer”. If anyone The women related to the deceased at all! She doesn’t seem to miss him”. was due to get married when they were wept a lot. They were supposed to Know what I mean? People wept in mourning, they wore black and the weep and express their grief. They but they were criticised according ceremony was at five or six in the morn- were expected to speak and say: “I to how much they wept. When the ing. If there was a baptism, the baby love him so much! I really loved coffin was taken out, they opened was dressed in a black cap, with black him! We were so happy! And now up the house and the female relati- ribbons and an amulet in the form of you’ve left me alone.” They spoke a ves who were closest to the decea- little black hands. Overall, as one of our lot and they wept a lot. And if they sed didn’t go to the church, didn’t interviewees rightly says, “mourning wept a lot, people would say: “She accompany the coffin, didn’t go to went a long way”. Dying and passing away are not synonyms RESEARCH 281
In other places in the Mediterranean, to demonstrate her grief. In Rugat, dance; doors and windows could only such as Italy, there were women in strict when Paquita’s grandfather died, her be opened a little, everything was closed, mourning who even covered earrings grandmother sewed black patches a deathly silence, a black bow on the and accessories for their hair with black onto the tablecloth, the tablecloth horse (a very important member of the silk or black thread (Di Nola, 2007: they used every day, for the pleasure household) and black ribbons on the 55). Mourning clothes came into exist- of eating and drinking. Here we see shutters. Alberto sums up the essence of ence as a way for family and friends to the need to indulge oneself in bereave- these customs: “It’s as if others are happy identify themselves when accompa- ment and make it visible. Any activity and you’re sad, it’s not right”. nying the soul of the deceased on its that involved pleasure beyond mere journey to the after-life. Black is the subsistence was curtailed. And even Mourning is a process in which loss, colour of mourning in many cultures subsistence was subject to restraint. As whether anticipated or sudden, is
Herminia demonstrates how the veil was worn when in Memento of a dead woman made with her hair, stuck to glass to mourning, Castelló de Rugat (2015). form a text with decorative elements; Valencia Museum of Ethnology R. FERRERO AND C. COLOMINA collection (1916). R. FERRERO AND C. COLOMINA and, whether people are dressed com- Reme says: “You had no right to enjoy transformed into the absence of the pletely in black or only wear a black anything”. deceased. And reclusion helped. This tie, armband or button, it has served necessary individual and collective pro- to identify those accompanying the Bereavement was also demonstrated cess allows one to recover the will to live deceased and it was considered desir- in various social customs10: no rice despite the absence of the loved one, able to wear it for some time (Flores, casseroles, no cakes at Christmas or gradually linking the loss to a renewed 2000: 204,180). Easter (and sometimes killing rabbits desire to live. Psychiatrist Fernando was forbidden), people couldn’t sweep Colina (2016), comparing processes of The outward signs of bereavement the street or paint the fronts of their mourning today and in the past, sees were not restricted to people’s clothes houses, cover their balconies for a pro- them as essential for the individual’s but even affected items in the home. In cession, go to the bar or go out to enjoy recovery and points to the long-term Salem, one woman, when her son died, the cool of the evening; they couldn’t go advantages of mourning in the past, painted the skirting of the wall black to the village feast, to the casino, or to in the sense that it progressively helps 282 RESEARCH Revista d’Etnologia de Catalunya December 2017 Núm. 42 one to develop a wish to emerge from “passing away” (faltar in Catalan), (1986 [1909]) in his systematic analy- the closed state of mourning. The tan- rather than “dying”, when they are talk- sis of rites of passage. We can thus say gible aspects of passing over provide ing about losing someone they know. that the death throes and death define strong symbolic support, they give In cities, however, and among young the separation stage, the wake corre- meaning to the situation and make people, the word chosen is “die” (morir sponds to liminality, while prayer and the person’s absence bearable through in Catalan). This reflects an impov- mourning represent incorporation. the codification of grief and its expres- erishment in the language which we “Dying”, on the other hand, would sion (Thomas, 1983). This is why they should pay attention to, as it alerts us only be included in one stage, limi- are necessary. However, thirty years ago to the disappearance of a way of living nality. The other activities involved in Gondar was already suggesting that and understanding the world, demon- death as a rite of passage are lost in the mourning clothes were becoming an strating a transformation on which we process of change we have referred to. anachronism. And with the clothes, the should reflect. In this framework we The strictly physical disappearance of other customs too. Nowadays, bereave- would assert that in Valencian villages the deceased only acquires a social sense ment, expressed in those terms, is seen people pass away rather than die. when it is perceived as a loss by the as a weakness, a wretched, reprehensi- community of which the deceased was ble habit instead of a practice that helps Although the two expressions are syn- us to assimilate death. onymous in grammatical terms, when part, i.e. when the social group inter- we analyse social practice we see that venes to deal with the loss collectively. It is also clear that mourning activated the parallel is reductionist: “passing Today all the ceremonies associated a feeling of belonging and mutual sup- away” means much more than “dying”. with death as a major rite of exclusion port. Our respondents report that on Talking about “passing away” requires are being lost because of the modern special dates meals were taken to the us to refer to the context in which the insistence on displacing death from our house in mourning by neighbours, loss occurs, while the word “dying” day-to-day lives. As Bauman (2014) friends or relatives: “little gifts” as detaches the loss from the surround- says, over the centuries death has ceased Herminia calls them. These exchanges, ings. In other words “passing away” to be a step towards another stage in which were always reciprocated, these gives the loss a collective sense, the our existence and been reduced to a offers of free gifts, fulfilled the func- community is involved in dealing with simple departure: the end of all our tion of social solidarity and continuity the disappearance of one of its mem- plans and projects. appropriate to the funeral process in its bers, while “dying” means simply dis- fullest extent. Indeed, death was a com- appearing. This difference, apparently So, while passing away implies conti- munity matter. And this is the sense of subtle, has social implications which nuity, dying is surrendering. If passing passing away that interests us. How- we should not underestimate. When away is remaining within the commu- ever, the transition that we can detect in we say that “pass away” is used regularly nity, still linked to it as part of the social our analysis of the interviews suggests in Valencian villages to refer to death fabric, dying is accepting the impera- that the concept of passing away, and and that the concept is being progres- tive of progress, assuming a transfor- everything associated with it, is los- sively replaced by the word “die”, we mation of society into disconnected ing its meaning. We are beginning to mean that a metonymic displacement dots. Our interviewees describe the detect the extinction of the processes, is occurring in which a part (physical transformation and are experiencing it. practices and representations related death) is making the whole (the social When Paquita dies, for example, if she to death which were part of traditional act of dying) invisible. And this is the is taken to the undertaker’s, afterwards, Valencian society’s view of the world, danger: the displacement is hindering before going to the church, she would and can sense the essence of change. the development of the healthy codes Let us look more closely at it. we need to assimilate the absence of like people to go to her house and those dear to us. stay for half an hour. This simple wish Traditional practices versus illustrates the tension between change modern strategies Consequently, for anthropologi- socially imposed and a personal desire The language of our elders is not a cal purposes, the socio-semantic for continuity; the conflict between neutral instrument used only to tell field corresponding to “pass away” is personal preference and the standards us things, but a medium in which they more comprehensive than the action of modern life. The conditional “if” (if live, a way of saying things that reflects of “dying”. In this sense, ‘pass away’ she is taken to the undertaker’s) reflects a particular way of life. The people we provides the complete ceremonial her assumption of a future imposed on interviewed in Vall d’Albaida refer to sequence described by Van Gennep her against her wishes. Dying and passing away are not synonyms RESEARCH 283
Obviously the tension between these toms that are appearing, her opinion is hegemony of hospitals and funerary two models involves suffering, whether categorical: “That’s why I prefer this”. institutions reveals a deritualisation one leans towards change or continu- Similarly, for Mercedes and some oth- that leads to the rejection and denial ity. As in the case of Claudio d’Aielo ers, the showcase of modernity they of death and the taboos regarding it from Rugat, many respondents feel see in the funeral parlour does not that we mentioned at the beginning uncomfortable about the difference change their preference for the way of this article. between what they would like for their things were done before. own death (“I’d rather be at home, it’s “At home I feel it’s more familiar, We can thus see that there is, unde- more natural isn’t it?”) and a desire you’re better at home. I’ve heard niably, tension between the different not to detract from the well-being of people say you get a de luxe funeral practices surrounding death for those their descendants (“they can do what at the undertaker’s. As far as I’m con- belonging to the “gap” generation, between old customs and the bewil- they like but I want to die here, to be cerned my home is more luxurious. dering modern trends. It is as if people brought here, I’ve been here all my There may not be so much luxury wanted a neutral transition from one life”). Others, however, are very clear for the person who’s died, fancy glas- to the other but this is obviously not about their decision. Isabel, the oldest ses and all that, but it’s home. And happening. For our interviewees the of all our respondents, who already has your relatives are in the house, all transformation does not necessarily a framed copy of the photograph she sitting there, the house full. I like it denote progress in terms of quality of wants on her gravestone, says that now- better at home.” adays the deceased are carried around a life or unmitigated well-being and nat- urally the transition involves losses and lot. She is aware of the uncertainty her However, we also find the opposite disagreements, on both the individual sister feels about her final moments and view. Fernando de Quatretonda and collective levels. Their testimony offers some advice she is not altogether chooses the undertaker’s. The wake warns us about rushing towards a new sure about. at home, with the presence of fam- model of death in which discretion, “(...) my sister is fretting because she ily, friends and neighbours is excessive understood as hiding grief, becomes says she’s been told she has to go to for him, an unnecessary fuss, because the “modern form of dignity” which the undertaker’s. She says ‘I don’t from his point of view it’s a time when Baumann mentions (2014). In our want to go’. And I say: ‘Once you’re the family can’t cope with so much view it is the consummation of death asleep you don’t know where you’re activity. Nowadays, with professional as resignation and surrender. going or where they’re taking you’. undertakers, “You don’t have to worry But I wouldn’t like to be taken there about anything”. Curiously, he refers to Examining the issue in greater depth, either. I’d rather stay at home. And the undertakers as the sanatori (rather he considers the inability of people in she has some concerns about the than the tanatori), the lexical confu- contemporary society to verbalise their undertaker’s... As she has a single sion highlighting its associations with deepest emotions, which condemns us son, she says: “It’s so that Rafa doesn’t sanitation, the health system and the to silence. Similarly, he warns about always have me there afterwards. technologies used to manage death and our aversion to grief, which pushes the And I say: ‘But if he...’, I don’t know, reflecting a shift in thinking towards dying person into solitude. He com- I don’t want to say anything either. something considered healthy, clean ments on the normality of “tame death” Because in this world, although he’s and, ultimately, desirable. It is an asso- in previous ages, assumed to be part of a man, he could still be uneasy about ciation of health with a location, the everyone’s destiny; although it could be it. I’ve never been afraid of the dead funeral parlour, which would seem lamented, there was no alternative to myself”. to represent just the opposite: empti- accepting it. Moreover, it did not call ness, coldness, isolation. Fernando is for action, it did not involve a sensation Rosa from Bufali also tells us that she not the only one who uses the word of failure and consequently humili- wants a wake at home, even though with this meaning. And the natural ation. The author argues that when her children say no, that the under- way in which it is used again reflects death is no longer tame it becomes a taker’s is the “modern” solution: the distorted view that leads to a false, “guilty secret” which has to be hid- “When I die, here. Bring the table artificially constructed need for asep- den in the functional, pleasant, tidy and put it here”. Hermínia, on the sis, going beyond what is physiologi- home modern life promises us. Death other hand, prioritises her children’s cally justified. The fact that death has thus becomes unspeakable. Fifty years decision, although comparing what become part of the domain of science ago Geoffrey Gorer (1965) described she has experienced and the new cus- and technology11 and has yielded to the death as pornographic, in the sense 284 RESEARCH Revista d’Etnologia de Catalunya December 2017 Núm. 42 that it was an intrinsically despicable aspect of human existence. He saw his death as tending to be clandestine and associated with feelings of guilt and shame, not to be discussed around him or mentioned directly. We no longer have the customs related to death and mourning described by our interview- ees, while we await fresh interviews with their descendants. It seems that today death is uncomfortable: people avoid looking at each other, no com- forting words are spoken, everyone wants to get away.
In view of this situation, we would insist on the importance of working 19th century tombstone. Reial Fàbrica de pisa i porcellana del Comte d’Aranda collection, with those we have referred to as the Alcora Ceramics Museum. R. FERRERO AND C. COLOMINA “gap generation”, precisely because in them we can see the mutations of pro- gress on the one hand and the harm Contrary to what one might think, approach implies less social, cultural caused by modernisation on the other. in traditional Valencian society the and therapeutic substance. And we turn once again to the views of word “faltar” is not simply a euphe- Gondar, as mentioned at the beginning mism. Although it does soften the Finally, although changes are not of the article. The treatment of death harshness of the concept of death, necessarily good or bad, we need to in traditional societies can be a healthy its social use shows that the choice of bear in mind that they sometimes influence, as the codes surrounding it word does not conceal the intensity have negative consequences. It is by bring together numerous circles and of the death process; far from this, it not disregarding these consequences neutralise the distress caused by the helps people to face death as some- that we shall be able to determine the person’s absence, as we have been able thing familiar. Paradoxically, nowa- advantages and disadvantages of the to observe in the responses of our inter- days the extensive use of the word changes. The philosopher Byung-Chul viewees. This occurs through activities “die” to refer to the loss of someone Han (2017) warns us that when death that facilitate a healthy acceptance of may be detracting from the meaning is denied in the name of life, life itself the sorrow caused by one’s loss. We of the process, avoiding the subject. mutates into something destructive. In must therefore recognise the beneficial, As a hypothesis on the basis of which the final analysis, the problem does not protective nature of traditional cus- we may continue researching, we reside in the change from one model toms for accompanying the grieving, suspect that when death is referred for dealing with death to another but as against the social pathology observed to less crudely and more subtly, in our current neglect of its disruptive by Gorer in the late 1960s, brought there are denser social relationships, effects.n about by the exclusion of death from closer and more affectionate bonds, day-to-day life. whereas a less respectful, less delicate
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NOTES
1 (faltar) in our towns and villages. Secondly, 10 Erlbruch, W. (2016): El pato y la muerte. he refers to a type of death he describes as Other manifestations of grief involved clearing Granada, Barbara Fiore Editora [https://www. “inverted” or “forbidden”. According to this the house of mirrors and bright objects (Valencia youtube.com/watch?v=N_lNJSAe6Y8]. model, which he situates in the modern era, region, Andalusia), not listening to music, letting death becomes shameful and subject to taboos, one’s beard grow (Murcia), wearing a button 2 with tendencies like protecting those who are covered in black cloth in one’s lapel, not lighting Thomas (1983, 1991), Ariès (2000), Cátedra dying and concealing their condition, depriving fires (Castile), etc. (Flores, 2000: 180). In (1988), Gondar (1987), Bauman (2014), Gorer them of their rights and control over their death, Sardinia they painted the doors, windows and (1965), etc. which becomes an illness. The physical location outside walls black. Black curtains were hung at of death has also been displaced, so that people the windows, the bed was covered with a dark 3 die alone in hospital, there is a lack of awareness bedspread and sometimes they even painted the In 1902, the Moral and Political Sciences and ritual around them, death is silenced in daily bed and the fireplace black. A black ribbon hung section of the Madrid Ateneo científico, literario life, and the emotions it inspires are rejected, from the head of the bed and the mirrors were y artístico sent a circular to its correspondents grief has to be hidden and mitigated. covered in black. In Santa Teresa, in Gallura, in different regions of Spain: teachers, notaries, sailors keep the boat painted black for a year ministers of religion, lawyers, doctors, etc. They 6 after the death of the captain (Di Nola, 2007: were asked to participate in the compilation of Blanco (2005), Duque Alemany (2003), Gómez- 55). Manuel, born in Perellonet in 1922, tells us data regarding rituals and beliefs, with exceptio- Tabanera (1968). that when his father died they painted the whole nal recognition for the time of popular skills and boat black and that they were all very upset. knowledge. In its circular the Ateneo defined 7 the purpose of the section as follows: “Science Frazer, 1944: 220. 11 can tell us what is known as fact or hypothesis, One of the consequences of this is that wes- but it also needs to gain ground in the immense 8 terners see death as something obscene and For example, sometimes, instead of shrouding area of the unknown. As well as teaching what shocking and they place their trust in scientific the body on the floor, some strips of wood were is known, we need to find out what is unknown. and technological progress, hoping that one day placed on the bed or, if it was done on the floor, This is the origin of research.” death will be conquered. Death is thus likened the corpse was laid on a new wickerwork mat, to sickness, health is technified and as death on which a shroud or sheet was placed. At other 4 is seen as indecent, dirty and inopportune, it is times, instead of using a handkerchief, an orange According to Duque (2003), in his study of the thought of as solitary. Moreover, hiding death or a small glass of coffee was placed under the rituals and customs of old Alicante, the presence has become part of social behaviour, as can corpse’s chin to keep his or her mouth shut. of the godfather was favourable to dying well. be seen, for example, in the fact that the dying are isolated, the process of death is concealed 9 5 from children, and public expressions of grief are Philippe Ariès traces changes in the concept of Anthropologist Alfonso di Nola (2007) develops avoided (Thomas, 1983). death and attitudes to it in the western world, this idea in his work through the study of the distinguishing two opposing models. Firstly, he positive, reconstituting effects of the customs speaks about “tame” death, treated simply, with associated with grieving in pre-industrial or no theatrical overtones, as a public, organised archaic societies. ceremony. This is the sense of “passing away”