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30TRINITYthe NEWS Trinity College is a place of superlatives. This is Ireland’s oldest and most esteemed university. This is home to the greatest academic minds in the country. We are surrounded by the most beautiful College grounds on this island. Everything about this place inspires greatness. Unsuprising, then, that among our fifteen thousand strong population lurk some of the best, brightest, most ambitious, talented and powerful students Ireland can offer. Here we list them. PL2 30TRINITY NEWS Trinity term, Week 3 Loves charity ad Alessio Frenda, President of the In addition, his Treasurer resigned, and he lost Graduate Students’ Union, had a bad his Vice President before the term even began. Hyear? Well, yes, as it happens, really, re- Once the term started, he...well, the Panel is ally bad. In a nutshell, he tried to filch hard-pressed to think of anything that Frenda €20,000 from the other student bodies (the CSC, has done. His spending power is a 4, as he has Students’ Union, DUCAC and Publications) control of large amounts of money (despite the whilst simultaneously giving money away to fact that he obviously has no idea how to spend charity. While there’s nothing wrong about giving it). Frenda comes in with a 2 for both profile and your own money to charity, he tried to give influence, reflecting a year of disappointment 16 everyone else’s money to charity, which led him and confusion for all involved with the GSU to being taken down a peg (or three) by College. under his guardianship. A laugh a minute ohn Gallagher is a known for his ability to contort boy does love the stage. History and French words, much to the amusement With a spending power of 1 and Scholar and pehaps one of the Wednesday night influence of 2, Gallagher is Jof the greatest whits of audiences. He is an much further down the list than Trinity College. Hailing acomplished debater and a his heir apparent counterpart in from Dublin, John is a finalist in the Irish Times the Phil, Barry Devlin, who also Belvadere boy through and debating competition. His score holds a position on CSC; through. Good mannered, of 5 in regards to profile is due nevertheless, the Panel predicts smart and above all an all to the fact that anyone who’s another good year for the Hist, round nice guy. As Record ever met him will remember particularly if Gallagher runs 17 Secretary of the College him. Gallagher is also heavily for the top job, something the Historical Society, he is well- involed in Players, after all, the Panel predicts to happen. The perfect BESS girl his year’s Dublin Uni- She managed to turn this fluence, as she might be auditor versity Business and around, with the BESS Ball, of DUBES, but this only gets Economics Society which sold out and was a big, her in with the BESS oompa T(the society for all the big success. loompas. There might be hordes BESS kids) auditor The lady has garnered a of them, but they are all very has really gone from zero to pair of 3s for spending power non-powerful, since they spend hero. Things didn’t start out and profile due to her position more time talking about their well: her committee was riddled in DUBES and the fact that fake-tan and clothes than notic- with in-fighting and nobody re- she’s done a damn good job at ing what’s happening around 18 ally expected her to do much. it. She gets a lonely one for in- them in College. The electoral overseer he handsome rising star of the Stu- Block nets him a 4 for profile, and having scored dents’ Union, Cathal Horan looks to most of the first year class reps last year helps as have a bright future ahead of him. well, as does his relationship with socialite Orla TSince becoming a class representative Marnell. Alas, Head of the Electoral Commission for Theoretical Physics in first year, he might seem important and indicative of respect has become more involved in the Union and ran within the Union, but he hasn’t landed himself the Electoral Commission this year (the most any positions that might give him influence and anally retentive and pedantic group of people, hence he gets a 2 here. Rumours abound of his ever). He gets a nice round zero for spending intentions to run for high office in his beloved power, as it is only the sabbatical officers in the Union (as well as branching out into CSC), so we Union that have any say. can expect him to be on the up and up for next 19 A regular around House 6 and the H- year’s list. You’ll hear her coming f random College knowledge was a qualifica- for her various societies, Beard scores her highest tion for the Power List, this American would in profile: obviously not enough to win a Students’ certainly rate highly. Try to find something Union election (better luck next year!), but having Ithat she’s not involved in: Chief Copy Editor the most Facebook friends in the TCD network for Trinity News, she sees this paper from has to count for something. Beard’s influence is 3, cover to cover before it’s published. As the dedi- as she manages to worm her way into everything; cated International Students’ Officer of the Stu- a significant amount of her powerbase comes from dents’ Union (read: the only international student assorted romantic interests (a boyfriend with a you’ve ever heard of), she can often be read in a gun never hurts). Although she ranks low on the letter to the editor complaining about an issue list, being simply the silent person in the room that no one cares about. (and by that, we mean every room) rather than Her spending power is a mere 2, as Beard the person in charge, look for her to attempt to 20 solely uses financial influence to grab more money raise her profile in her final year. Trinity term, Week 3 30TRINITY NEWS PL3 For the record... ot that we’re biased bitchy hacks this year who have would hazard). The Record has here at Trinity endeavoured to create some been described as “the best News, but does the passable standard of journal- Record in years”, but even a cur- NCollege really need ism, chiefly by ripping off The sory glance through its archives the Record? So we Guardian and anticipating that would prove this faint praise. have a newspaper that covers a former Union officer would Generally well-liked as news and events in College and be capable of tracking down a human being, Tighe’s profile then we have one that covers news-worthy stories (alas, delu- of 5 is due to her, occasionally, Union news and events while sion strikes). leaving her office to saunter promoting the Union agenda. Tighe’s spending power down the hallway (“anybody Propaganda rag? Don’t be ab- is 3; one has to ask how much want tea?”), and her influence 11 surd… that dirty rag costs to produce 3. We imagine some people The Record, to its credit, (more in blood, sweat and tears read it… has employed a number of than cold hard cash, the Panel A total playa’ iaran O’Meala is the honorary patron. Despite this, penchant for Shakespeare. One outgoing Chair of O’Meala has managed to wonders if he ever managed to the College’s reunite Players this year. The put this skill to use when Ccliquiest student darling boy presided over the working as a sales advisor as society – Dublin 75 year celebrations, although Schuh? University Players. His rise to some say a little more could The Senior Sophister the top came after Players’ have been made of the event. Drama student’s hard work was 12 most controversial AGM in Not just a committee member, rewarded at the recent CSC recent history, which lead to the O’Meala is one of Players’ best Awards, where he received the storming out of the society’s actors with a particular award for Best Individual. Taken at face value n English English student, Joey Facer is trading that goes on between the various capitated arguably the most innocent of the political bodies. operators on the list; the Chair of DU This year has been a relatively good one for Publica- APublications certainly shies away from tions, mainly due to the absence of scandal that char- politics, despite being a regular around acterised previous years. Facer scores a four for House 6. Facer is the other half of Trinity News editor spending power, given the high revenue of publica- Gearoid O’Rourke and between the two of them, tions such as Trinity News and the €47,000 Pubs re- they command a great deal of influence in Publica- ceives from the Capitations Committee. Her profile of tions and the college media. Some might say she slept 2 reflects the fact that Facer commanded more space 13 her way to the top, but the Panel would never be so in Piranha! this year than the Junior Dean: now, that’s cheeky (after all, she signs his cheques, not the other a feat. Her literary credentials remain confined to her way around). Her position on the Capitations Com- column in Trinity News, which causes as much contro- mittee also allows her some influence in the horse- versy as Roisin Ingle’s regular contributions to the Admiral on deck abriel Magee arrived at Trinity as just to distribute promescuity packs to the horny post another American obessed with the grads of Trinity College.