l$EUt#7. llocsm[sr 2000 6. MaureenKincaid Speller 26 points 7. ChristinaLake 25 points 8. AlisonFreebaim 23 points Well, buggerme sideways,I nearlywon 9. SimonOunsley 22 points a Nova! For thosewho didn'tsee the votins 10.Lilian Edwards 21points results... I reproduce the top ten in the fan writer Fanzine: category so you can see how close the l. Plokta, ed. The Cabal 66 points competition was, with less than ten points 2. Tortoiseed. SueJones 38 points separating these worthies. Rather than 3. This Here... ed. Nic Farey 35 points explain the voting rules and points systemin find them at Fan Artist: detail, those interested can 1. SueMason 80 points www.cooky.demon.co.uVn3 0/novarule.html 2. SteveJeffery 74 points but suffice to say that Yvonne snuck it by 3. D West 58 points virtue of four first-place votes to the three Fan Writer: each gotten by the Sainted One and m'self. 1. Yvonne Rowse 29 points (And if I hadn't voted for him I'd have I'd :2. Nic Farey 29 points beaten the bastard.) Of course, if :2. Mark Plummer 29 points persuadedthe BlessedBobbie to fill out a :4. SandraBond 27 points voting slip, I would have (probably) won it, :4. Claire Brialey 27 points but as she points out, she doesn't actually

-1- meet the requirement of having read five the flesh since he was a babe in arms), and different fanzines - aren't we honorable? for me this was probably the best day of the Although voter fumout was substantially whole trip. down on previous years (44 total ballots I make that last statement with no cast, I think), it's still a goodly helping of disrespect to Novacon, which I've always egoboo to be up there, especially in the enjoyed a great deal, although this year's company of many of those whom I admire was a little - er - peculiar in some respects. and respect.I'd like to thank my mother, my There was certainly a bit of an atmosphere, agent,Steven Spielberg etc. etc... and not just from Dave Hicks' socks. Mentioning my mother, she's sadly back Although it doubtless should have been in in hospital again after another fall in which thish, perhaps we'll have a full disclosure she re-fractured her previously injured hip. trip report in #8: ("Day One: It is less than She'd fallen outside the house back in the four hours until our flight time, and we are summer of 1999, and ended up spending still sitting at home, over an hour away from about three months in hospital until they the airport, waiting for the plane tickets to deemedit was OK for her to go home. She's arrive...) been getting about with a walking frame On a happier note, this holiday seasonI ever since, but not leaving the house.On this got around to re-instigating a tradition of occasion she'd been getting ready for bed at sorts - phoning Paul Di Filippo for a chat on her usual time, but slipped coming out of (or Christmas Day. As usual, we had a most going into) the downstairs bathroom. pleasant conversation, including some Luckily, the next door neighbor noticed that interesting tidbits on the relative veracity of the lights were on past their usual time, the TV seriesProvidence, the central house came over to check on her and immediately of which is apparently only a block or so called the ambulance when she saw what away from Paul's. We make tentative had happened.I finally got to speakto mum arrangements for the four of us (Paul, a couple weeks ago (after having been kept Deborah, the Blessed Bobbie and I) to meet posted by various relatives that all was up for at least a nice lunch if Mr. & Mrs. basically going OK), and she sounded fine, Farey make it to the Boston Corflu as so we figured she should be out in a shorter planned. I certainly hope so, as I am left to time than on her previous incident. When I ponder that if this potentially most pleasant phoned on ChristmasEve, however, she was encounter takes place, it will be the first in a stateof confusion and making much less time we will have physically met during a sense,although curiously she was able to tell friendship which has now lasted some me the exact day when she'd "gone funny". fifteen years. I'm waiting to be able to get a hold of one of Last but by no means least, a brief but the more sympathetic members of the ward heatfelt thanks to Steve Stiles for the RCA staff who'll actually tell me what's going on. logo take-off for "Tunes!", and belatedbut Absent any other explanation,we're thinking no less heartfelt gratitude to Alexis Gilliland it's wacky meds of some kind, since her for another couple fine fillos which are yet actual voice was as strong as usual. to appear. Her fall this time happenedthe day after we left the UK from our family / Novacon "$omslltnor $nsctacular Amorlcan [vent" visit. This was doubly upsetting in a way, becausemy son Tommy had been brought Part2 over by his grandparents, and we had a You'll recall that when we intemrpted our "family day" at the house with a bunch of nuptial tale, the ladies had just departed for cousins I don't usually get to see (through the hotel to do their primping, and the boys lack of time) and the wean. Mum was happy (well, me, Joe and Danny) gratefully leapt verging on ecstatic (she hadn't seen him in

-2- upon cold beers (well, me and Joe did) as habit), we scheduledthe bachelor party for soon as the car was out of sight. the Saturday a week before the wedding. We had a couple hours to chill a bit and The only problem in this case was that the get ready, as well as figuring out commiserations actually went on for the transportation for the various foodstuffs whole week. Her brothers and I finished this lounging around the place (Charlene's stretch in a pub about an hour before the barbecue, the marinaded chicken et al). actual wedding, so certain parts of Essex Also, I was still not entirely sure how we were treated to the sight of a number of were going to convey the keg and attendant London cab drivers in full top hat and tails shitloads of ice without a secondtrip. regaliaswigging Listerine and gobbing it out We got most of the food loaded into Joe's into the gutter. Sadly, this appearedto work. custom truck (with fashionably low Well, back to the Blessed One & L Us suspension and a bumper sticker which lads managed to get the stuff to Jefferson reads "No Fat Chicks"), and, luckily for us, PattersonPark OK, except for a slight fuck- SarahAnn's ex Ricky turns out to be coming up where we thought Matt was getting extra to the wedding after all - we'd thought he'd ice, but he wasn't, so we had to send the be watching their son Cody while Sairy was poor sod out again to get some. The keg is doing the girl thing with the rest of 'em at iced down, my personal supply of Busch the hotel before coming to the ceremony. hidden under the Pepsis, the grill lit, and Apparently the wean was safely deposited beers in hand, we await the moment. As I with responsible parties, so Ricky was amble around the festive-looking premises, dragooned into transporting the all- sweltering mildly in the 85 degree heat, I important keg. Matt arrives as most of the deflect comments about whether I'11 be rest of us are changed,and we sort him out taking off the frock coat at some point. for ice detail. "Listen", sez I, "With what this fucking A soothing beverageor two later, we are thing cost to rent I'm keeping it on until it ready to hightail it - yours truly absolutely, falls off or runs away screaming of its own positively not forgetting the mouthwash, accord,so there." since I had been thoroughly admonishedthat Spying the pastor'sarrival, I acknowledge any given pastor is likely to walk off if he him from a safe distance then retreat to the gets a whiffof alcohol from the principals of secret stash of mouthwash to freshen the the marriage party. breath. I have, up to this point, also secreted That reminded me somewhat of my first beers at various strategic points, lest the wedding, a sumptuous (i.e. fucking representativeof the Christian religion espy expensive) event normally consigned to the me with one in my hand. Swoosh, spit, and depths of memory and recalled as off to greetthe Rev... infrequently as possible, and then with a Of the actual ceremony itself, there's cold hand clutching at the bowels. really little to tell, since I've already Wifey #1, despite my seemingly described the music and songs lastish. I permanent impecuniousness, decided she would, however, like to reproduce our vows had to have it all - horse & caniage to and for your edification and enlightenment from the ceremony, everybody in full (wrote'em ourselves,we did): morning dress (I always thought that was a Bobbie'sVows... deliberate pun), and her wedding dress by "Nic, before we met, both of us had fucking Dior, as far as I know. She'd also traveled some rough and rocky roads, and told me in no uncertain terms that if she even though we know that God has led our smelled alcohol on my breath when she lives to take one path the journey to this day walked up the aisle, she'd turn a.roundand has not been easy, and we would be foolish walk right out again. Sensibly enough on to think that we won't still run into rough this occasion (and this was to become a terrain and mountainsto climb.

-5- "But I'm not worried or afraid, becauseI "When I was widowed, I didn't think that know we have God's hand to guide us and I would want anyone ever again, and when I His arms to carry us if it gets too tough, and was in despair then, I didnt think that I know I have you walking beside me to anyonewould want me. catch me if I fall or to push me if I need "But I was wrong, and this song tells how encouragement, and I am here today to I feel..." promise that I'll be there in those sameways ("Maybe I'm Amazed", as by Wings) for you: We also included a Unity candle "In all circumstances, ceremony with the kids, which my wean "In happinessand sorrow, Tommy thought was really neat, especially "In sicknessand in health, the way the candle flared up when we lit it "In plenty and in want, together.("Dad, can we do that again?") "From this day, until our joumey as one Everybody who spoke to us afterward is over. said it was one of the best (and most "The rest of my vow is in this song..." original) ceremonies they'd ever seen. (A ("The Color of my Love", as by Celine little justified bragging, there.) Since the Dion) Blessed One has it in mind to start a Nic's vows... wedding consulting I organizing businessat "As the song says: "'We'vecome a long, some point (hopefully soon-isft), this must long way together, through the bad times indeedbe seenas an auspiciousstart. and the good... " "After the joys and the trials of the last Iunss! few years, we've finally made it through to this, our wedding day, and so it's tempting to think of this as the end of a journey, when of courseit's really a beginning for us both. "Because it really is a beginning, I have to remind myself of what it is I feel and what you mean to me, and so I make you thesepromises: "I promise to cherish you, and honor you. "I promise not to take you for granted. "I promise to be your lover and your friend. Time once again to consider our single "I promise to cheer you up when you're and album of the year. Just in time for the sad. Xmas rush, and for your shopping and "I promise to celebrate with you when listening pleasure,a number of name bands you're happy. have released singles to promote their "I promise to be with you whether we're upcoming albums, as you might expect. rich or poor, in times of trouble and in times Several of these are, in fact, thumpingly ofjoy, through the bad times and the good. good, and worthy contendersfor the not-so- "I promise to celebrate you, and praise highly coveted This Here... award, although you like I should. at the rate award shows are multiplying on "I make these promises here today, TV these days, I could expect a call from witnessedby our families and our friends, in Fox at any time. company with the good wishes of those who Anyhoo, let's start with U2. I've always could not be here today, and watched over had mixed feelings about this band, as they by the spirits of those who are no longer seem to veer from fad to fad, or from the with us. interesting bits to the bloody awfirl bits of "I love you. Bono's imagination. They've put out some of

-4- the greateststuff I've ever heard ("Desire", bit of a rip whena groupmines an albumso "Where The Streets Have No Names") and exhaustivelyfor singles,but every release someof the worst ("I Still Haven'tFound..." from "Californication"has beena gem, and - what was that song abour? Buying his the abovementionedtune beatsout the rest mother a Xmas present?). After all that by a nose. "Pop" and "Zoo" dicking about, however, the single "Beautiful Day" is a stunning return to form for the boys. The album ("All That You Can't Leave Behind") has been getting rather tepid reviews, and the lyrics of the single are indeed rather trite, but when the music and the arrangementis back to the old U2 bombast,who fucking cares? Another awaited release was the latest from the Wallflowers: the excellent single "Sleepwalker" from the new album "Breach".Jakob Dylan soundsso much like his old man on this track, even down to the style of the guitar cadences,and it's quite eerie in a way. (Novacon GoH Christopher Priest agrees wholeheartedly when I play this for him, and simultaneously recommends the elder Dylan's new collection: "The Essential Bob Dylan", a 2- CD set from Sony/Columbia.) Steve Green fave The Offspring also have a new offering in "Original Prankster", the single to promote their new album As for album of the year, there aren't too "Conspiracyof One". As is often the case, many obvious contenders that I've heard, the riff is quite derivative, but not so much although I was well impressed(as you might as the earlier "Why Don't You Get A Job", expect) with the Mighty Mighty Bosstones' which you could actually sing "Ob-La-Di "Pay Attention", and although the Ob-La-Da" along to. The song is bouncy, songwriting in particular is superb, and the tight, and lots of firn. arrangementsare back to the older, more The latest Collective Soul effort, "Why hard-edgedstyle they used to favor, this isn't Part 2", is, on the other hand, a little quite enoughto do it. disappointing, but only to the extent that it's Probably the best rock album out this not quite up to the musical quality of, say, year is "Something Like Human" by Fuel. "Heavy". It's also somewhatdisconcerting to The single "Hemorrhage (In My Hands)" learn that one of the tracks on the album has gotten extensive airplay, and under "Blender" is a collaboration with Elton John, advisement by of all people. E John might need any kudos my former andlor cred that might arise from this, but stepson Justin I'm sureCollective Soul certainlydon't. that the rest of Anyhoo, enough shilly-shallying. Despite the album was the strong entries above, and several other actually better worthy contendersof the past year (special than the single mention to Eels' "Mr. E's Beautiful Blues"), (wow!), the the single of the year is "Otherside" by the Blessed Bobbie Red Hot Chili Peppers.I always think it's a bought it for me.

-5- Dead good, it is, and of course you have to established over the last few months, like the stefnal album title and cover. don't especiallysince Vince Russohas been out of you? the pictwe in termsof writing and booking Maybe the real best album of the year is matches. However, the (bV now) long- one I haven't heard: "Red Dirt Girl", the runningrumors of the impendingsale of the latest from Emmylou Harris. This is the first company by Turner/Time Warner (most album in a long time where she's actually often mooted to be to a group headedby written most of the songs herself, and it's formerWCW honchoEric Bischoff)seem to been garnering largely favorable, if not have things in something of a state of ecstatic reviews. You know that guest confusion. appearances by Bruce Springsteen, Patti Sta:rcadeitself, happeningright here in Scialfa and Dave Matthews can't hurt, DC's almost-brand-spanking-newMCI either. In fact, the presenceof Matthews on center, has been rather under-promoted, the album is about the only chance I've got some say woefully so. As of five days of getting this from the Blessed Bobbie in beforethe event,$50 seats(second highest the Xmas stocking, since she likes Emmylou priced) were said to be still available in about as much as she likes Willie Nelson. somequantity. Let's addto this the fact that Which is to say, fucking not! lt's worth the MondayNitro the week beforewas pre- giving her some shopping money once in a emptedby the TNT movie specialof David while just to get her out of the house so I can Copperfield,and aired on the Tuesday,a listen to thesetwo. fact you would have been hard-pressedto Speakingof the Blessed One, she'srather find out if on-air announcementswere fond of "Little Things", the single from a anything to go by. Add this to a major new (local) band called Good Charlotte. productiongoof the previous Monday (in This fits into the "cynically amusing teen angst song" category, along with Wheatus' "Teenage Dirtbag", and both are interestingly good in their own way, though neither has any huge aspiration to greatness, and both may turn out to be one-hit wonders. Finally, a quick mention to Fat Boy Slim's "Rockafeller Skank". This could be the most insinuating song I've heard this year - it just seemsto want to stay and stay with you. I've always liked that kind of minimalist repetitiveness that Big Audio Dynamite used to do so well (including tape loops, effects and so on), and while Slim isn't in exactly the same style here, I certainly feel he's following the tradition. All together... Right about now - thefunk soul brother Check it out now - thefunk soul brother.. [asdUl Approaching the pay-per-view WCW which Sid Vicious, having been "arrested" calls "the granddaddyof them all" (funny, I earlierin the show,was supposedto arrive thought that was the Rose Bowl), you'd at the last minute in a police car to brawl expect some good build on the storylines with ScottSteiner, a carefirllyset up pieceof

-6- business which was inexplicably not heavyweight championship, having brutally shown),and you'd not unreasonablyget the dispatchedBooker T (and several others on impressionof overallshoddiness, suggesting the way) to acquire the belt. Word is that perhapsthat a lot of the staff basicallydon't Steiner may keep the title for anything up to givea shitanymore. a year, which is good in terms of having a credible heel champion who rarely delivers a duff match, but may be bad for delaying the inevitable confrontation between him and Goldberg, who in a Russo-holdover angle has to duplicate his original unbeatenstreak As usual with WCW, though, the facts (of 127-0) or lose his contract. After the are not quite so straightforward.In earlier thorough dismantling of Booker T (and movesto cut expenses(it's well-knownthat anyone else in the way, natch), finding the companyis losingmoney hand over fist) credible opponents for Steiner could have the Nitro and Thundertapings now occuron proved difficult, but the Starrcade swerve the samenight, essentiallyat the sameshow, brought back "the original madman" Sid although the commentators maintain the Vicious to be his opponent. This was fiction that Thunder takes place on a actually well-written, referring back to Wednesday - in my opinion, rather Vinny Ru's stripping of the title from Sid overdoingthe "just 48 hoursago" bit. Also, many months ago, a title he never actually many of the experiencedproduction staff, lost in the ring. While still a little stumbling those presumablymost familiar with the in places (like calling Scott Steiner "Rick", techniquesof putting on a wrestling show, confusing him with his brother), Sid's havebeen let go in favor of the equivalentof promos have shown a remarkable job trainees.It's no surprisethat underthese improvement from his previous run in circumstancesfuck-ups are gonna happen. WCW, when it seemed he couldn't string The "visible" (i.e. storyline) power more than four words together without structurehas gotten interesting, with "Above mangling three of them.. Average"Mike Sandersof the NaturalBorn The cruiserweight division was retumed *atingslcilers Thrillersrelishing his role as to some semblance of credibility by the heelcommissioner, having taken that post in defeat of previous title holder, Commish typical fashion by win over "The Cat" "Above Average" Mike Sanders by Chavo Earnest Miller facilitated by interference Guerrero Jr., late of the Misfits In Action. from his pals. Now posturing as "Chief Although no defense was scheduled for Executive Officer", the returnedRic Flair Starrcade, a 6-man ladder match would falls well into the face role, though the determine the #1 contender. The US belt, parallelswith Vince McMahonare painfully held by "General E Rection" (Hugh obvious. Flair claims to be completely Momrs), leader of the abovementioned retired from the ring at this point, but the MIA, is on the line against"The Franchise", rumor mill has it that he will be making an ShaneDouglas, and dirty tricks would seem actualreturn to rasslin'at somepoint. I hope to be indicated. Douglas has hyped the not, becauseas popular as he is with the match (and his feud with the MIA) with crowd, he still looks so fucking flabby and typically good promos, and taunted Momrs slow that expectingany matchhe's involved by basically calling his challenge for the US in as a rasslerto haveany goodmoves in it title a "stepping stone" to the World is stretchingthe boundsof believability. Championship. Leading into the PPV, it's almost all The Hardcore division has also seen changein terms of who's holding the belts. some changes, with the title eventually "Big PoppaPump" Scott Steinerlooks all dropping to one of my favorite rasslers, set for an extendedrun with the world Crowbar. Although some say that he's more

-7 - wimpish since coming under the influence the tag team titles. It continuesto amazeme of "70s Guy" Mike Awesome. After a that Nash in particular is so over with the surprisereappearance disguised as Santaon crowd, although I grant you he's one of the the Monday Nitro before Stalrcade,old best actors in the bunch, and he has been warhorseand hardcorelegend Terry Funk is selling his matches rather better lately. bookedto challenge. Knowing his popularity (he was getting huge pops even as a heel), he just loves to wind up the management by referring to Scott Hall, his former partner fired by WCW, either directly or obliquely at every opportunity, since he knows he'll get a cheap cheer from the dumbass crowd. Apparently he and Pagehave been instructednot to refer to Hall any more, under threat of a fine. Anybody with half a brain knows that the company does not want Hall back under any circumstances, given his history of bad behavior and drunkenness. Shit, even the ECW decidedthey wouldn't use him! Hugh Momrs ("General Rection") retained the US belt against ShaneDouglas, but it looks like the "Misfits In Action" gimmick is on the way out. Momrs has had a huge push from the company, but the MIA The "new" (hem-hem) tag team of Kevin aren't really that over with the crowd, and it Nash and Diamond Dallas Page ("The also seems that Chavo Guerrera's Insiders", oh how droll) are slated to meet "defection" may be a prelude to the breakup "The Perfect Event" PerfectShawn Stasiak of the group. In a mildly skiffy aside,there's and the other dopey-looking one of the NBT been something of a campaign to cast the to try to get back the title belts which were MIA's "Corporal Cajun" (Lash LeRoux) as basically stripped from them and handed to Gambit in the projectedX-Men sequel. the Thrillers by Sanders. In something of a surprise, Teny Funk So how'd it go? A report by a fan in retook the hardcore title from Crowbar, but attendance stated that the arena was indeed this turned out to be just part of a work to only half full - which has to be depressing allow Crowbar to go back to his original for the powers that be, since even "demented garage mechanic" persona, untelevised WWF events usually sell out. claiming that the 70s gimmick put on him by The account also claimed that, apart from Mike Awesome had made him go soft. the opening 6-man ladder match, and the Adding to this Awesome's apparent appearanceof Goldberg, the crowd kept up a defection to Team Canada (what?!?) makes fairly continual chant of "Boring! Boring!". you think that the 70s gimmick is over. This may be said to not bode well. Good. Results-wise,Steiner predictably retained The next PPV is hard on the heels of this the World belt, but he really needs to win a one, with the renamed "Sin" airing on match or two against credible opposition January 14th. Again, you have to question without the use of his trademark "lead pipe" the decision-makingup there in WCW-land, as an equalizer. As pumped as he is (some since there will be only one more Monday chemical assistance there, perhaps?) he Nitro leading up to the event, due to pre- ought to be able to pull off the wins without emptions on Decembet 25thand January ltt. it. Also predictably, Nash and DDP regain

-8 Thereare still signsof life, so let's hopethe to avoid those, but my friend who tapes little improvementwe've seen continues. westling PPVs for me keeps sending them Latenews: Steiner's run aschamp may be to me, as punishment for something I guess, shorterthan originally planned.Apparently and I try to watch most of them. God, what his accumulationof injuries and general crap. It bothers me watching legends who condition mean he's walking, as an deserve that status such as Ric Flair and eyewitnessdescribed "like a 70 year old Teny Funk making fools of themselvesand man" on the day after he rassles,and even allowing idiots like Russo to make them before a match it takes him an hour to look like fools. It bothers me more to see loosenup. It's difficult to tell if this story / good, promising younger wrestlers such as rumor is a work, sincehe still works hardin Lance Storm and most of the Mexicans theering, but might explainthe lack of clean being made to look like wimpy boobs by finishesin his matches.Also, regardingthe uselessstiffs like Kevin 'BigLazy'Nash and X-Men sequel,I hear that the WWF's The Terry 'God of Wrestling' Bollea. Goldberg Rock hassigned to play Beast. has been ruined completely. Booker was given the title because some guys have a LocoGitato racial discrimination suit againstWCW. f[Much of this I can agree with, especiallyyour remarlrs about Nash and the [[Editorial comment looks likp this... bald git. However, Lance Storm has gotten a Rodney Leighton's opening letter arrived huge push (having held the US / Canadian just too latefor thefinal cut in TH#6...11 heavyweight title), has "Team Canada" Sept15 assembled around him and ls getting Rodney Leighton writes: consistentheel heat (in the US, at least). It's I did quite enjoy TH#S, from your something of a disservice to Booker to soy dissertation on the titles of loc columns to he was only given the title to defray the the amusing colophon. I have developed a potential damage of Sonny Onoo's lawsuit self-defense for you booze & brag-about-it (however true that might actually be). bastards of skipping these sections of Booker wos o popular champion, and well fanzines, but I did read your experiencesin over with the crowd - you can't say he didnT q AA with interest. I think I told you I have a earn World Title run...JJ sister in AA; it has been a greathelp to her TAFF... yes, officially, it is supposedto in many ways. Of course,she wanted to stop cover all of North America. Good luck to drinking, which you obviously do not. Not anyone outside the continental US who my problem; if you continue to sendme This wants to stand for that fund. Or who wants Here I will just skip the boozing bits and if it to see the English fan who comes to visit. I becomes too much, I will ask you to stop was hoping for 2003 but then I realized that sendingthem. Simple, right? if Toronto does win the Worldcon, that is the year that someonegoes from the States [[Sounds fair enough to me, though I think you meqn you have developed a self- to Britain. The fact that I like, for various reasons,the last three "winners" somewhat defense against us bastards rather than for us. We already have our own - it's called get obviatesmy distrust of the TAFF system. drunk and ignore you. Simple, right.-.?JJ [[You'll have seen my remarks in #6 by Strangely enough, although I have been now, so I'll not repeat them. I've argued that getting The Knarley Knews for quite a long a rescheduling of TAFF to allow a North time, this is the first, as best I can recall, that American candidate to visit the Jersey Eastercon (Helicon) in 2002, then a I had any idea that Henry [Welch] watched wrestling. Well, he doesn't if he watches European delegate to visit the Toronto WCW. What a fucked up promotion. I only worldcon in 2003 would be beneficial all seetheir PPVs and lately I have been trying around...JJ

-9 Did you know that thereis a pornovideo community has written about rasslin' before. out entitledBritish Housewives'Adventures You can stay on the mailing list (and you or somethinglike that which includessome can consider me os delusional as you like scenesof female British lawyers showing for that) as long as you likE. It'd be a poor off their underwearin train stations.Know loccol that only had one opinion in it. As any femalelawyers? you'll have by now seen, assumingyou got the back issues OK, that I'm more than happy to print views which dissentfrom my own. It gives me lots to say (which of course pisses offA Scott, which she sez she doesn't mind me saying as long as I keepplugging her stuff at www.kittywompus.com ) Speaking of plugs, Rodney also mentions what I assumeis a music reviewzine which includes a column by him: $3 to Jersey Beat, 418 Gregory Ave., Weeha,t*en, NJ 07087...ll

OctoberI2 From [email protected](CoeA) Soon to be appearing in a sex video near you?... Marty Cantor writes: you posit supposed I don't understand you and EBF re In this ish some from me. Well, Britney Spears. I think she's cute. I would shields against smartassery (as you really call her expressionlustful innocence. they will not work should know). I mean, why would I comment about I contemplated chiding fAnders your poison it not making Holmstrdm] for denigrating wrestling and showering off and pay little attention to self- then concluding with a comment about any difference? I what I really want to watching some juvenile TV, reading some mutilation. Besides, comment you made to juvenile fantasy and going to sleep. Sheesh. comment upon is "We usually start when the But that is just another example of the Alexis Gilliland: opens(10 or 11 am) and toil steadilyon diversity of interests. As much as I admire bar the wee wee hours." Well, if what Harry Warner, Jr., the God of fannish through you axe drinking is bheer I expect that the hermits and loccers, I would have likely had wee wee hours come soon and often. (You to growl at him for a commentsuch as [...] cannot win, you know.) rock music and wrestling being proof of the Stoppit...JJ death of Western civilization or some such [[Aaaaaargh! glad has clarified crap. But everyonehas their views. I am that Ted White what he wrote about Ardis Waters. My This Here is, I think, the first and only SF that written by fanzine I have seen which has writing about initial reaction was similar to (although not exactly the wrestling... I look on rasslin the sameway Lilian Edwards same), yet I have had a complete block in some fans regard sci fi ... and contemporary writing my thoughts about it in a loc to music. I really like your loccol; this is a I wrote (had I good method and it is a fun read. Can I stay Squib. Obviously, whatever through my block) would on your mailing list? Can I scan (rapidly) been able to break given what Ted has any drinking stories you include, shake my have been incorrect, written herc. 20-20 hindsight is wonderful, head and mutter "poor silly delusioned but I would have liked to have seen these bastard"without actually writing it? Addresslisted in "FanzinesReceived" clarifications written into the work itself as paint of a [[Er - you just wrote that out loud, they certainly a bit different Rodney.I'm surprisednobody else in our li'l picture of Ted. And, along with Robert

-10- Lichtman's further writing about Ardis' I assume you understand the earlierlife on the WestCoast" it showsboth consequencesof driving on a suspended Ted and Ardis in a better light than my first license, so it's none of my businessto take on Ted's article. I guessthat it all just belaborthe point. shows how many of us put our own attitudes into what we read. And how wrong we can sometimesbe. I must say, though, that (like Hlavaty) I did not find the article prurient, just demeaningto Ardis. Robert, in his loc, makes clear that she had a casual attitude towards sex, something not made clear by Ted. So, not having known het I came up with the different conclusion mentioned by Robert. [[Ted's loc spoke of his possible 'failing [...J in being unableto conveythat context", which I did not necessarilyagree with, but I think with your comment above: "it [...J shows how many of us put our own attitudes into what we read" you have hit the nail on the head. Or one of many nails, perhaps...JJ Hmm - titles of fanzine letter columns. I previously wrote about my letter column in Holier Than Thou. In No Award, my letter column is titled Loc oN Load, signifying firing off shots of smartassery.As A Scott (our Mutual Admiration Society) might say, there is a bit much of mv commentarv in mv zine. Enough. I1825 Gilmore St.#105, North Hollywood, CA 91606

October I0 E B Frohvet writes: [Your caption here]: I like the picture. Very Dodge City, very Wyatt Earp and his schoolmarm lady. The only thing that distinguishesit from a l00-year-old picture is something about the eyes, something about the smiles, that says, "Look, we're in period piece costume."I note for the record pulchr itude... that I am using an actual l00-year-old Extr eme picture for comparison (my great- Julia Roberts does nothing for me (that grandparentsc.1900). Congratulationsand spasticsmile makes her look as if she'sin for long happinessto the joyous best wishes the final stages of tetanus); but I would couple. happily watch SandraBullock grate cheese. [[I think I see what you mean about the [[1, too, can't understand all the hoopla smiles, though in my defenseI was having about the Robertswomon. I think she'sugly. such a good time that I was smirking all Now GeenqDavis - whoooo!...JJ dav...ll

- 1l - Having nothing to say about music or articulis interruptus, but try not to make it a wrestling, I move on to note that This Here regular practice. Uh, splifting articles, not is much expandeddue chiefly to a lengthy getting married, that is. letter column.Lloyd Penneysays, "We all [[Oh, I don't know. If getting married want to be seenas fannish in the eyes of was always as muchfun as we had, I think others..."Speak for yourself,Lloyd: I can I'd like to do it every weekend. Uh, get take it or leave it alone. FIJAGH. I will married, thot is...JJ agreewith you that boxing is a sport. Far You wonder about what to call ex-in- more than some of those things they laws; a useful word is the Yiddish invented at the recent Olympics. mishpocheh, pronounced mish-PAW-kheh. "Synchronizeddiving", forsooth! I was not Often used as "the whole mishpocheh" to familiar with the "Doc Weir Award" in mean the family, including relatives far, British fandombut it seemslike a goodidea. near, remote and self-identified. My first Of course,at somepoint voting for Langford wife, Dolly, died in '91, and I stayed in for "Fan Writer" probably seemedlike a touch with her father, Kohlman, who died at goodidea... I disavowthat TAFF is run by a age94 in '98. We went up to Harrisburg for formal clique, however I believe that in his funeral, my son Charles who was one of common with other fannish functions it several grandchildren, me (the ex-son-in- tends to be dominatedby a certain vague law) and my second wife Lee, where we groupwho areprotective of "their " turf... were all part of the whole mishpocheh. As [[That certainly seemsto have been the also was Sylvia Bloch, the widow of Ralph case with the recent outgoing North Bloch, who was the nephew of Elisabeth, Americanadministrator who mayhave seen Dolly's mother, Kohlman's first wife. TAFFas a kind of personalfiefdom. In this Your car sorows are duly noted. On case,however the 'formal clique" involved Tuesdaythe car (a'92 SubaruLegacy) died ultimatelyconsisted of oneperson: to whit, on Lee, and a Triple-A tow truck eventually U O'Brien...JJ brought it and her to the dealer. Where they Gary Diendorfer says I remind him a replacedthe crank sensor for $699.67. Sigh. little of Buck Coulson. Okay, I'll take that It may be time to get a new car. asa compliment...Arthur Hlavaty findsno A little more on Ardis Waters. contradiction between Christianity and Instinctively, Lilian Edwards considered humor. I agree. As a child I attendeda her a victim, without being clear on how she churchwhich employedan enthusiasticbut was victimized or by whom, but Ted White not very skilled organist;I and my parents obliges with the trauma: "(Ardis) lost her were frequentlyreduced to silent gigglesby virginity to the high school football hero and whatthe poor man did to Bach... got pregnant, all in one near date-rape,after Liked the picture on p.31 also. My which the 'hero' in classic fashion 'lot goodness,Nic, with a little effort you could respect' and moved on." AND her self- tum This Here into a genzine.If that'syour crippling reaction to it: "I don't believe intention. Ardis ever again allowed a man to have the 4716Dorsey Hall Drive#506, Ellicott City, MD upper hand with her, and she adamantly refusedto allow any of her lovers to become [[A genzine?Go washyour hands...;rtont father-figures to her son." That is, Ardis refused to love and trust any man, and had October I l sex with them as a meaningless, Alexis A. Gilliland writes: contemptuousgesture. This is supported by ...congratulationson your nuptials,even Ted's observation: "that having sex with if the descriptionthereof can't fit into a Ardis after our ardor had cooled was single issue of your small, zippy fanzine. actually inferior to masturbation." Why? You publishat frequentenough intervals so Ardis'heart wasn't apart of the action.Also, that the jaded readercan put up with the

1a when Ted says "our ardor" he means"my From [email protected] ardor" becauseArdis kept her ardor where Arthur D Hlavatywrites: the sunnever shines. I wonderhow that little Congratulationsand like that on your boy of hers grew up without any father- wedding.Best wishes to you both,or I guess figures? all, countingthe kids. [[A very interestingquestion there which I hope you get over your infectionsand no-one seems to have addressed. Did infestations,but just to be on the safe side, ChristopherRobin ever becomeactive in I'm not going to rub your zine in my hair. fandom, having presumably been on the You can't be too careful.I just read(on the peripheryfor a while...lJ Web, whereelse) that a womanis suingthe October12 Red Cross, claiming that she got herpes Paul Di Filippo writes: from demonstrating mouth-to-mouth Alas, circumstances find me in another resuscitationon an infecteddummy. time-bind - but that's good, since the rush is I hope the TAFF/Canadatempest in a to provide clean digital files for a new pisspotblows over soon.At leastno one's collection: Strange Trades, from Golden saidthat Canadais a wimpy zone. Gryphon. Yay for the good guys! Gary Deindorfer's "l donot like [[Readers can check their website at Hlavaty...I think he's a Jewish smartass" www.goldengryphon.com /or updates on strikesme as a nonsequitur,but what do I this, I'd assume...lJ know? ln any event,he's got me dead to rights. Gary also says, "I never tire of Big Willy," which I believe I saw in an ad for a X)O( Web site. Robert Lichtman has a much saner attitude to recent music than I do. Good for him. [[I find so far that Robert seemsto have saner attitudes to However, had to comment on "Th'ish mostthings. I worry about him...JJ 'Ere" another one arrives. (Over-elaborate Chris Murphy: Jack Chick believes that wordplay - pleaseforgive.) C.S. Lewis's fantasyis just as bad as all the Cover photo reveals a handsomelad and other stuff, either because it shows beauteous bride enjoying themselves imagination or becauseof Lewis's contact mightily - or else, Bonnie & Clyde after with the papist Tolkien. successfulbank heist. Take yer pick! This is a reasonablypiss-poor excusefor [[Dunno about the heist, but we'll take a loc, but I'm pubbing a new ish that should theproceeds...JJ be in the mail to you within a week. In all seriousness,I'm glad the day went so well. Many happy returns! [[Lloyd Penney's letter (below) included Features & letters all excellent! A fine some commentson issues #l thru #3, which crew of correspondents,equal to the wit and I was kind enough (or mean enough) to send pep of the editor. on at his request. Some have been included [[Now that's egoboo...JJ as still relevant, somejust to piss off A Scott; My fave new gal singer: Marisa Monte of well, you lcnowthe drill...JJ Brazil. Want atape? October 27 2 PoplarStreet, Providence, RI 02906 From [email protected] Lloyd Penney writes: [[Sure, I'd love to check the tape out...JJ

October I6

13- First of all, congratulations on tying the Halloween is now more for teens and adults, knot(always the best decision you can make to go to parties and have somo fun. The kids rMHO). either stay at home and ignore the whole I never did see your previous zine, thing or concoct some kind of gathering Arrows of Desire, but it soundsas if it was a with an early wrap-up... it is a schoolnight, therapeuticdevice for you, to let out all your after all. Besides, would today's kids be frustrations and angst, and communicate caught doing anything the adults thought with everyone after temporarily letting go of was fun? Not likely. your personalbaggage. (I think This Here... [[I beg to dffir. In our neighborhood,we does the same, but not as much. Perhaps get kids of all ages trick-orlreating. This your personal baggage has been greatly yeor, as usual, we v)ere visited by six or reduced after getting your life together, and sevendffirent groups, accompaniedby one getting manied.) or more parents (aren't we a sensible lot?). f[For you and others who arcived late, The Blessed Bobbie walked the the final(?) issue of Aruows of Desire was neighborhood with Stephanie in a mob completely atypical. Apart from #1 which including Charlene and her lot, while Matt was essentially a perzine, all other issues & I stayed at our house to dispensethe loot. were themed genzines, usually containing A lot of the housesput on a display of some fiction as well as other articles, lists, humor kind, and some of them get quite elaborate - and so forth. I received a submission out of one this year had a mechanical cat chasing the blue from a lody named Tracy Twyman, down the yard, another had a motion- and that stirred me to begin the undoubtedly activated witch. We're luclE in that our cathartic process of writing about my late neighborhood has no thru trffic, so there's wtfe's passing. That issue of AoD is online little worry on that score. The only concern (at www.megspace.com/arts/thishere)and tends to be with some of the older kids previous issuesare slated to follow. I'm not (who'll typically hang together on their own at all sure I agree with your comparison of and perhaps visit another neighborhood), Arrows of Desire to This Here... (perhaps since we'll get at least one report of candy- you should read the otherfirst), since I don't snatching. This actually happenedto the boy feel that I'm writing here for reosons of Dan'l and his buddies over in Western personal baggage. Letting out some angst, Shores (next neighborhood), but they chased perhaps, but maybe I'm really just an down the perp and got their loot back, opinionatedold git...JJ although Danny did take a punch for his I think the Mighty, Mighty Bosstones trouble...JJ may be a Toronto-basedband. Used to see Ah, a picture of Lilian Edwards [[in their name on the local club listings a lot. #3JJ.Met Lilian some years ago in Toronto, [[Nope, they'refrom Boston...JJ when she and Christina Lake, the Thelma Harry Andruschak's vision turns blue and Louise of British fandom, were visiting when he's on Yiagra? Somehow, there's a with Tommy Ferguson when he lived universal balance to that fact, and not just here... a very beery and enjoyablenight. that the pills themselvesare blue... [[At least they'll stop him seeingredfor a while eh?...JJ Halloween is coming up, and even though we're an apartmentbuilding, the little brats still get in and hammer at the door, demanding candy. And probably as usual, we'll spend a quiet night, patiently ignoring the hammering. Every year, though, the hammerine comes around less and less. 6... Hey, I've never been quoted on a something about low-cholesterol meats, in front cover before! Brownie points for me. the form of ostrich meat... an even better, Wonder what the exchangerate on brownie and tastier low-cholesterol meat is emu. I pointsis... had some emu steak and emu meatballs Some Hugos go to a variety of writers recently... very tasty, and a treat for the every year, and it's good to see that the inner camivore. talent (and rocketships) is shared around. [[Bill's linla have been updated recently, However, with the artist and fan writer ar www. galaxy-7.net/squib/links3 . hhnl .. .// categories, it's the Usual Suspects on the I wish we could finish up the TAFF ballot, and the Usual Recipent'sname on the mess. I do not for a minute believe that nameplate.I got a marvelous surprisewhen I Canadian fans as a whole are discriminated went to the Chicago Worldcon... I found against for anything. You're right... instead that I had actually received 17 nominations, of complaining, Canfans have got to get and was 7 noms away from actually being more involved with TAFF if they want to be on the ballot. With Guy Lillian, we both a part of it. However, few Canadian fans tied for sixth place. Not bad, but actually have the awareness of the aspects of getting on the ballot would make a wild international fandom, so few here know dream come true. what TAFF is. Yvonne and I won CUFF a The Barenaked Ladies, a crazy bunch of few years ago, and are waiting for art to Toronto boys! The BNL were just a garage arrive so we can get our trip report done. band at one time, with their star on the rise Once that's done, I think I'll say we've done locally. They were asked to perform at the our bit for fan funds. New Year's Eve party at Toronto City Hall, [[Hmmm. I'd say that as a supporter of but the mayor at the time found out that a fanfunds, particularly TAFF, my "bit" is not group with a name that "objectified women" done yet, so I don't subscribe to that (her politically correct term and reason)was attitude. I will still nominate and/or support invited to performo ffid she cancelled that candidates,vote, donate to auctions and no invitation. The reaction to this $azy doubt participate in the occasional waclqt decision got the BNL the attention they stunt (ah, 'Tudor for TAFF', such happy neededto become national and international memories). I note that at UK fan fund stars... almost immediately, they were auctions in particular, the audience tends to offered a big recording contract, and the first include manyformer nominees,winners qnd result was their album Gordon. They've tried so on.., being serious on their newest album, but we Penneys Up The River and other CaFF all know better. A lot of their songsshow up Tales (1998 CUFF trip report) ls now on the Dr. Demento show. available. Email [email protected] f[The Blessed One & I caught them live information on how to get your copy. Note at last year's Farm Aid concert, and they this is a dffirent addressto Lloyd's listed st were one of the most entertaining acts there, the head of this loc). All proceeds to CUFF, especiallysince they were thefirst act on the I expect...JJ day to put together some between-songchat I see Gary Deindorfer shares my taste and routines speci/ically"for the event...JJ for FOSFAX... I receivedit for closeto five When I wrote about needing a list of top years, but when the right-wing rants began SF sites, not long after writing it and to turn boring and slightly xenophobic, I sending it to you, I was reminded that Bill ignored the zine until it stoppedcoming. I've Bowers' list on Squib's website was pretty had some good chats with Joseph Major thorough. Still, I say so many websites, so since, but Tim Lane ignores me, and all's little time, and as I slog through them, I right with the world. discover just how many of them haven't I just received electronically issues 68 updated in over a year. Also, I mentioned and 69 of Bob Tucker's LeZombie.

- 15 - Fanhistory has come back to entertainus. I'll Canadian participation; it was after writing be printing it out and enjoying it true fanzine that query that I received STET 9 which style. explained all that. I am leery of writing My letter... style-wise, I wouldn't much more on this topic. For one thing, it is compare Heinlein and Rowling, but some getting somewhat boring but primarily I am neofans of the future may hold her in the afraid that some of the people who are same high regard as the one author that got connected to this business whom I would many of us reading SF. In fact, Rowling was rather not have pissed off at me will become just through Toronto at the Intemational pissed off at me. Mark Plummer, for Festival of Authors' annual events. instance. Hey, I have NO objections to Rowling's reading was not set in a cozy hall, friends visiting one another. Unless I am but at the Skydome, our big sports stadium. assured by a few people whom I respect This reading attracted close to 15,000 kids enough to believe that TAFF is a wide open and adults, which may set a Guiruressrecord contest, I will not believe it. There are for largest audienceat a literary event. people in the group with whom I have some What did the cover of FOSFAX 200 look contact; otherswho I have not. Normal. This like? If those of us who don't like the zine fund was started as a method of sending would definitely appreciateit, and if it was a Walter Willis to North America. If it was a sly and rudejoke by David Thayer, I would fund listed as a means to send a certain definitely be interestedin seeing it. (I'd like person to Great Britain or a Brit to the to seeTim Lane's reactionto it, too.) States,I would have no problem with this at [[I doubt I could do the coverjustice by a all. Simply announce that the 2001 TAFF meredescription, so I'll sendyou a copy...JJ fund is to send Nic Farey and his bride to Great Britain. Fine, go for it. f[Much of the following (seven-page) I hardly think one off the cuff comment rant from Rodney has been excised in the constitutes pissing and whining but, well, interests of reader sanity, though I kept the call it so if you wish. Me, I am physically, rather unusualopening statement...JJ psychologically and financially incapable of accepting any such thing as being a TAFF (beginning) October 30 delegate if 'winning' it were a real option. Rodney Leighton (again) writes: Given that Lloyd Penney and his wife have Congratulations on your wedding. May con experience,have a lot of fan experience, you two live happily together until one of have shown a willingness, desire and ability you dies a natural death. to attend cons and give speeches and Not very probable I don't suppose,huh? apparentlyhave the money to do so and they t...1 have been deemed unacceptable, I don't next section (on TAFF) had me [[The know of any Canadian who might pass gnashing my teeth and ready to insert muster. Mike Glicksohn, maybe, although comments at almost every turn, but as a he didn't get far in 1987 when he did stand model of restraint (for now), I'll wait until for the thing and I believe he is mostly the end, and suggest you do too. But feel gafiated anyway. Andrew Murdoch might to take notes...JJ free qualifr. Dale Speirs might but I don't So, I gather you expect to take a trip believe he accepts fan fund nominations. home one of theseyears as a TAFF delegate, Can't think of anyone else. Which is, of eh?Nothing else explains your vehemence.I course, a viable reason why there hasn't was unsure whether to argue with you or been a Canadianwinner. But why do I have laugh at you on this one. As I have stated, to point it out myselfl TAFF is merely something which amuses Maureen Kincaid Speller, a fine and me; it is kind of fun to toss out comments upstandingwoman, during her United States and read the reactions. Which is not to say odysseyin 1998,spent some time with each that I was not honestly curious about

-16- and every US TAFF delegatedating back to fon (originally, as you say, Willil to 1983 which was Avedon Carol and I actually meet those with whom they had assumeyou know where she lives. I find it a previously only correspondedvia fanzine or bit diffrcult to believe Maureen did not letter, thusfostering and improving relations know all these folks prior to visiting them. It between them for years to coma I suspect would be relatively easy to destroy your the original "trip report" concept camefrom commentsabout 140 votes for Sue [Masonl a desire of fans on either side of the pond to proving the validity of the race. But doing so Jmowwhat their coruespondentswere like in would involve Sue, who sent me a photo via person, and thus relied on their Joe Major and shows every indication of representative to provide these details. being a nice woman; Maureen; the These days, TAFF is seen by many as some inesteemable [sic] Bug, your friend Tudor kind of "reward" for fannish activity, and by over acrossthe seaand, hell, it ain't worth it. others (notably Don Fitch, with whom I I don't know if you saw STET 9 but agree on this) as on opportunityfor, as Don here's a quote: "TAFF has been subject to puts it, "encouragement"for future (and more controversy than any other fund. presumably continuing) fanac. In other Almost since its beginning, its words, to establishcontacts which will stand administratorsand supportershave wrangled in good steadfor many yeqrs, This does not over the suitability of candidates, the detract .from, and in fact includes, the technical details of voting, partisanship on original purpose of the fund. It would seem the part of administrators, outright to me (and to the TAFF constituency,I don't embezzlementand more. " doubt) that a Nic Farey candidacy would be And Leah gives the standardbullshit line a move of extremearrogance. I do not need about Europe to North America. So there. to establishfan contacts in Europe, since I Enough of that. spent ten years or so doing that before I [[I shall now take a deep breath and wait moved to the States. I do manage (usually at for A Scott to leave the room. OK then, somepersonal hardship) to visit the UK to although I get the distinct impression that attend Novacon almost everyyear. If I stood I'm wasting space in replying to you, since as a candidate, my platform would have to you've obviously already drm,unyour own read "A free vacation would be nice". Well, conclusions about TAFF, and no amount of of course it would, but that's hardly a basis facts appear able to removeyour headfrom for election, despiteyour continued cynicism your ass on this one. However, if you have about theprocess. the patience, I'll W to spell this out slowly Who are the "few people whom [you| for you, and apologize to other readers for respect" who need to assureyou of TAFF's having to re-mqke points which you clearly bona fides before you believe it. And, more haven't understood, and also ask you a to the point, why don't they? I certainly hope couple of pointed questions which you they're less close-mindedabout it than you could, ,f you so desired, answer in a more are, since yelr opinion is clearly set in succint manner than is your usual style. So, stone. you "gather [IJ expect to take a trip home Frohvet commented lastish about the [...J as a TAFF delegate"? If you can draw discussion involving Lloyd Penney's that incredible conclusionfrom my so-called suitability "getting old", and I agree. But my "vehemence"yott need to /ind another tree having answered this (by pointing out that to bark up, especially since I've publicly there is no way a nomination could be stated several times that I would nominate actually refused),you trot out the same old any Canadianfan who wanted to stand. It's shit of "they have been deemed totally clear by now that you have absolutely unacceptable".So I thereforeask: Mo told no fucking idea what TAFF is about, so the Penneys that they were "unacceptable" listen up. Thefund's first purpose was for a as TAFF candidates? Name names or shut

-17- the fuck up. If any finger-pointing is to be extent,and the Penneys)a great disservice. done, there are only two figures of "fficial Someof us out herewould realbt like to light authority" in TAFF at any given time, to wit: thefire of TAFF in Canads,but it'll be a the North American Administrator and the Iittle dfficult if you keeppissing on it...JJ European Administrqtor. Knowing the t...1 European Administrator at the time Andruschak went Itltaff* (Maureen Kincaid Speller) as well as I do, I somewhatoverboard in 4WW*. lcnow she would never do something like wishingyou do 3 years this, so tf you are accusing Ulriha O'Brien merelyfor a DWI. [...] then say so, and we can get a proper I wish you would lose lynching party under way. the habit of mentioning So, "It would be relatively easy to destroy booze consumption [myJ comments about ]40 votes for Sue every paragraphor so ffifi proving the validity of the roce", but you but if your booze don't want to involve her since she seems chatter becomes like a "nice woman" from her photo. Indeed unbearableto me, I can she is, and if I were her U be well fucking simply ask to be pissed at you right now since you've inferred removed from your 1r/ by your remark that her election was mailing list. It's easy. I really don't care if somehow tainted. If you were paying you drink yourself to death, outside of the attention, you'll lvtow I have no axe to grind fact that doing so would deprive me of a as far as the validity of the result is super fanzineto read. concernedsince I nominated, supported and [[I print thesestatements merely to show voted for another candidate. Sue won fair that I don't disagree with you about and square, and I (and I'm sure she, as the evervthing, Rodney, but your perception of current European Administrator) would be me "mentioning booze consumption every very interested to hear why you deem it paragraph or so" would seem misguided, otherwise. and even futile given that a large part of I have STET #9, and amfamiliar with the several issueshave been devoted to my 28 quote you cite, which is, indeed,an accurate day rehab experience.Any suggestionshow statement. It moy seem strange to you, but that could have been done without the seeminglycontinual "controversy" which mentioningdrink? Didn't think so.I checked attaches to TAFF only occurs becausethere This Here... #6 (which included reports on ore a large (yes, large) number of people the bachelor and bacheloretteparties), and who care a great deal about thefund and its found that of the 60 paragraphs before the continued existence.If nobody actually gave LoCs begin, 8 of them mention drink. Make a shit, TAFF would probably have expired that every sev e n- and- a-half par agraphs ... J J somewhot ungracefully after Bergeron's It's no wonder Gary Deindorfer doesn't misplacedaccusations back in the 80s. get laid much if he insults women like that. As for "Leah gives the standard bullshit Somewhere I noted that you state you line about Europe to North America". Er - prefer the We Can't Wrestle promotion to Leah who? There was no Leah. (s this the Extremely Crappy Wrestling promotion somehow swptomqtic?) The TAFF rules and the We Will Fuck-you SPorts explicitly state "Europe" and "North Entertainmentempire due to the latter being America", not "UKtt and "USA". Just over the top and having too much T&4. becauseit hasn't happenedyet doesn't mean Kind of strange given that Vince "God I it is precludedfrom doing so. Bad logic. wish I was a McMahon" Russo has never Apart from talking an inuedible amount had an original idea in his lousy life and of shit on this subject, you are doing your every single thing in WCW is copied from good friend Frohvet (and me, to a lesser WWF. I hear that company IWCWI is on

-18- the block andmay be soldby now. I only Just as I had reachedthe conclusion that seetho PPVs.t...1 I enduremost of them all femaleBrit fansare big-boobed broads, after I have watched all else. Actually that's you describe Ms. Lake as ethereal and not true. I watched Fall Brawl before I willowy. Really? watched the latest ECW PPV. Both had [[Yes, really. Though in common with some good points. Unlike thoseTorcft dorks, many of us these days, not quite as willowy I thought the first 2 matches were OK, as she once was, but equally as ethereal. Steiner vs Goldbrick was not bad but And I think you may be confusing "big- nowhere near that rating and although it was boobed" with "impressively-cleavaged". Not obvious that Kevin Nash believes WCW is alwaysthe same thing...ll dead and is trying to rebuild his rep so that Pay no attention to the illustrious A he might get back into WWF and I was Scott, your loccol is a delight to peruse.I rather amazed to see the big bum actually could likely add another page or three but move his lazy ass a little bit, that match, shall forego doing so. Gotta loc Quasiquote while not bad for who was involved was not 3. above**. Addresslisted in'Faruines Received' But almost all of what used to be pro October3l wrestling sucks these days. Oh, by the way: From [email protected] more t&a on WCW PPVs than on WWF Robert Lichtman writes: PPVs. Dawn Marie is the hottest babe in If I hurry, I can get away with writing wrestling but Tylene Buck aka Major Gunns commentson only one issue of THIS HERE is close.Me, I am enjoying seeingStephanie for a change. First off, of course, are the McMahon shakeher fat assaround. obligatory but heartfelt congratulations to been watching WCW since way [[I've you and the BlessedBobbie on your tying of before Russo,when Bischoffinaugurated the the ol'knot. I enjoyedthe first part ofyour nWo and WCW ruled the airwaves. Though wedding chronicles and unlike A Certain it's argued that the Bisch contributed to Scott (ust gave 'er a middle name,I did!) I WCW's ultimate drop in the ratings by can wait for the continuation. Was a bit concentrqting too much time (and money, stunned at the cost for it all -- makes me and power) in the hands of the guard", "old appreciate even more Carol's and my those were some good and consistent decision to elope. No pavilion, no DJ, no storylines. I tend to agree that Russothinks rentals. Our pastor was less expensivethan he is a lot better booker and writer than he yours, too, at only $150 and she had to drive actually is - since he's been out recovering up into Yosemite National Park from his multiple concussionsthe storylines from Mariposa. (I started to write "cheaper" but (and indeed the in-ring action) have been we didn't get to know her that well.) flowing a lot better, though there have been [[Likewise congrats back at ya! We some extendedpromos this weeh as I write we actually did the wedding (11/21) which is, however, understandablea figured somewhat on the cheap, but as usual we days away the Mayhem PPV. It's few from were spending money we didn't really have. my opinion that the new talent hos had a lot Keeping the numbers of invitees down more to do with improving ratings than helped (and, of course, pissed off some Rzsso's writing. To clarifu my position on people who didn't make the list). However, the T&A question I don't have a problem - my considered opinion is that it was worth with that on the PPVs (in the more, the fact it. Everyonehad a blast (especiallyme) and better) but I'm a little leery of the amount on agreed it was a memorable ceremony and the regular shows. And yes, Tylene Buck is reception...JJ hot...JJ I don't know about the "correct way to t...1 refer to your former in-laws when you have been widowed," but in the case of mY

-19- formerin-laws via divorceI think of them remaining to do to make our own marks." I with tonguefirmly in cheekas my "out- don't know who the "cranky living-in-the- laws." Not to their face, though. past types" are he's referring to, but for me [[Robert, that oldjoke is sooooo beneath fandom is past, present and future. With an you. Cantor I expectthis from, but you? ...JJ eye on the here and now and towards the The Calvert County Treatment Facility future, I still maintain that it's useful, though and the courts that support it are certainly not necessary,to have some knowledge of more hard-assthan the comparablefacilities the fannish past so as to know something of here in California. My son who I wrote what's gone down and perhapsnot to repeat about in previous letters -- the one who got some of the stupidities that have been popped for a 0.12 blood alcohol level (and committed in the name of fanac in years you're right: he wasn't particularly impaired) past. This is not the same as "dwelling" in -- got his license pulled, too, but he got in the fannish past. return a piece of paper that allowed him to I'm a little mind-blown that Lloyd had drive to and from work and to be able to do been archiving Trufen. I regard it as an what he needed to do to keep food in the ephemeral thing certainly few of the pantry and his daughter (my granddaughter) thousandsof posts are particularly deathless properly taken care of. But other than that, -- and have saved none of it. If I really they're the same as CCTC: they want you to wanted to look up what, say, Dave Locke become an abstainer, and as you say for said about rats' asseslast June, I could go to some people that isn't an option over the the Web archive and look it up; but as I said long run. Nor does it particularly make above I tend to live more in the fannish sense; as you point out, you hold down a present. good job and you couldn't do that if you Ted [White] is quite right that "the early were a total lush. So, to sum up, I hope you sixties were a time in which there was in this don't get caught driving yourself; I'm glad country and in my social milieu a lot of for the arrangement you've worked out that lifestyle experimentation." He summed this involves you getting up at 4:45 a.m. on the up back then in a four-page essay titled days Bobbie works to catch a ride; and I "Expansive Love" which posited the notion hope the whole fucking nightmare is behind that one could love more than one person at you in the near future. a time, and in a vanety of ways, and that it [[The update on this is likely to be in was a healthy thing. This appearedin one of thish's Egotorial, but at the time of writing the early mailings of a private apa called, (10/31) I'm awaiting notice of the MVA variously, Apa-X or Apex, and was, as you hearing I appliedfor, to askfor a restricted might well imagine, the springboard for "work license" such as your son has discussions that rattled on for many (had?)...11 mailings. I don't think the essay ever Most sorry to read of your car problems, appeared anywhere but Apa-X, and I washing machine problems and, worst of all, wondered when reading Ted's comments your scabiesproblems. When I lived on The that I quoted above if it might not be an Farm in Tennessee,both lice and scabies interesting item to reprint -- to give more of struck me and my family and so I am both a flavor of those far-off times. completely familiar and fully sympathize [[Sounds likp a splendid idea. Perhaps with the amount of poisonous medication Victor would run it in 'Squib' as a kind of and mass quantities of hot-water laundry follow-up to theArdis Waterspiece...JJ you're forced to endure. I honestly couldn't I never thought, as Sheryl Birkhead did, say which is worse: the treatment or the that the Australia trip report issue of hours of washing. BANANA WINGS was the final issue -- A most hearty secondto Lloyd Penney's and now, ofcourse, anew one has appeared comment that "there's lots for those of us that establishesit bevond a doubt.

-20 - Regarding Tobes running for TAFF Regarding e-mail, internet qccess and so on, againoit would help his causein terms of although I use the internetfor personal stuff gettingvotes on this side of the Atlantic if qnd get personal email and do most of the he would put out someeffort to sendissues zinework at my place of employ, we are of his fanzineover here. I don'tknow if you specifically told that, particularly when web- get them,but I sureas hell don't and so only surfing but also when receiving e-mail at the know him by reputation. compan:l address, we have, as the phrase [[As with a certain uazed Swedeof my goes, "no expectation of privacy". I don't acquaintance,Tobes is more written about actually think that's unfair. I do maintain a than writing, to paraphrasethe quote.If he couple other e-mail addresses on web has a zine out at Novacon(which I'll htow accountsbut rarely use them, since it's more nextweek, as I write),I'll snagan extracopy convenient to get everything in one place, for you...JJ there's no illegal content, and I delete read Still speaking of TAFF, Rodney e-mails and scrub the folders regularly so I Leighton is full of it if he really thinks don't get a build-up of toot...JJ TAFF is somesort of good ol' boys club. I Did Not...: My own experienceswith But I've taken ol' Rodney to task in the analysts, as a patient, were different but pagesof quite a few fanzinesthis pastyear oddly similar. Having talked to others who over his weird notions about "The Usual" have had such dealings with this profession, and don't want to start up with him here. my conclusion is that analysts have their Well, not unlesshe deservesit, but he hasn't own agendas,which they will follow at all even appeareddirectly in your pagesjust costs, and any differences between their yet. agenda and the patient's needs, views or [[Now he has, as you'll have seen. condition is due to the fact that the patient is Sharpenyer cudgels...J1 a patient, and therefore wrong. In my Thanksfor the nice commentsabout the opinion they have far too many government- latestTRAP DOOR,and I immodestlyagree supplied powers to make people do as they with your final sentencetherein. say, ply them with whatever treatments or drugs they are working with at present, and "November2000" eventually lock them up in a secure facility Alan Sullivan writes: where they can keep them dosed to the gills [[Commentson #5...JJ on whichever brand of "zombie juice" is Egotorial: Congratulations on getting currently in favor. It is my belief that we your fanzine on the web. I'm assuredthat it's should exterminate these people, as they the way things will be. Unless the new laws present a clear and present threat to the rest our beloved government are plotting to foist of us, and outlaw the practice of their so- on us come into practice, which will allow called "science". But that's just what I employers to monitor use of e-mail at work. think... I strongly suspect that an awful lot of folk [[Many might agree. Back in the day, will suddenly find themselveswith restricted behavioral problems were dealt with by access, or stripped of privileges. Not that performing lobotomy, later by electroshock this will stop the hardened fan, working in "therapy", later still by mind-altering drugs. their free time, but it's a worrying UK readers of long memory might recall the development. On a much brighter note, "liquid cosh" controversy of a number of congratulations to yourself and Bobbie on years back where it was common in British getting wed. May your union be long and prisons to control "dfficult" prisoners by happy. basically drugging them into insensibility. [[I can hear A Scott's teeth grinding by Given this less than stellar history, it would this point at all the nuptial platitudes. Well, not befeasible to argue that the "profession" bolloclcs.The Blessed One likes to read'em. of analysis (by inference "behavior

-21 - modification") has not really progressed very Interesting also thqt you should far. ${r mentionthat thesepeople work to their own )$E agendas.One item which hasso far escaped mention occurred during my "intake" interviewfor aftercare(I'm in a "high-risk" category,y'know). Theygo through a form set of questionswhich are obviouslyskewed to their of an alcoholic(which as A "model" "Ssritlr" N{r:- and:l\4r', Smith." Scott sagely pointed out in Kittywompus, would include most of the UIQ, including In the letter column, Lloyd Penney one which asks "V[/hat'sthe longestyou've expounds one of the worst reasonsto prefer ever held a particular job?" The clear Toronto over Cancun for the worldcon. I inference(and expectation)is that us poor voted for Toronto, but it certainly wasn't becauseof the weather. Of all the places I drinking slobs drift from employment to employmentwith monotonousregularity. have ever been on Labor Day, the one with weather was... W'henI truthfully replied "Fourteenyears" the most uncomfortable the interviewer was visibly startled. Toronto. The weather was uncomfortable outside even at 3 AM. The second most Needless to say, this fact was never mentionedagain...JJ uncomfortable place I've ever been on t...1 Labor Day was Phoenix. You mention that Address listed in'Fanzines received' you don't have to leave the air-conditioned hotel during the worldcon. Well, sometimes November 3 you do. In Phoenix, there was a large cement From [email protected] area between the nearest hotel and the MiIt Stevenswrites: convention center.Fans dubbedthe areaThe My LoC on This Here #5 must have gone Anvil Of God (from Lawrence of Arabia). astray. I don't recall I said anything all that I managed to get a mild sunburn just significant. I explained the WASP matter, getting from the hotel to the convention but othershave coveredthat ground in#6.I center and back. You're right, everybody is also commented that Britney Spearslooked in denial about something. For instance, I OK, although I had no idea whether she deny any involvement with the assassination could sing or not. In any case, onward to of John Kennedy. I barely watched it on issue#6. television. I also deny any responsibility for [lThe missing LoC may have been my the Hindenberg disaster and sawing fault, as I seemto recall receiving one along Courtney's boat. With a little work, I could the lines you describe. Another great compile a lengthy list of things I would mystery of lfe, I suppose...JJ deny. You do seem to have quite a few You mention that you haven't been problems. Car problems, washer problems, mentioned in the last 50 issues of Ansible. and marriage (Oh MV). OK, so not On thinking about it, I realize that I haven't everybody regards marriage as a problem. been mentioned in the last 50 issues of Some people even like it. Of course, some Ansible either. This seems like a sinister people like being beaten with whips too. I coincidence. Do you suppose Dave realize I hold a minority opinion on the Langford is plotting to eradicate us from subject of marriage. I not only oppose the fannish history altogether? legalization of gay marriages,but I'm also in 6325Keystone St., Simi Valley, CA 93063 favor of illegalizing the heterosexual ones. [[Damn and blqst that Deaf Man! Give The gays obviously don't know when they 'em a couple of Hugos and they think they are well off. rule the world, eh...JJ

a4 November11 heard of, However, with more and more From [email protected] fanzines having online versions (as indeed Don Fitch writes: File 770 does, as well as Mimosa, Squib, I'm rarely sure whether to extend and indeed This Here...) the dynamic may congratulations or condolences to people change. Wouldn't it piss a lot of people off announcing their marriage -- so many such (including me) to see Emerald CiA win a a:rangementsseem to turn sour & miserable rocket?...Also see Don's remarla below...JJ after a few years... and (probably a bigger [You say:] "It's not much of a surprise factor) I'm a confirmed "live alone" type that Joe Mayhew takes a posthumousrocket who'd be unwilling (& would probably find for Fan Artist. I hope commentatorswill not it almost impossible) to adjust for long to the deride this particular vote as a "sympathy" needsof anyone else. Abstractly, I know this or "tribute" result, since there should be no isn't common (or good), but hey, I'm set in doubt that Joe would have been a very my ways. So maybe I'll settle on wishing worthy winner had we been fortunate you and Bobbie a somewhat ambiguous enoughto have him still with us." "Good Luck & Best Wishesto you both". Yup. Same with Ian Gunn at [[Oh, we'll take it, and the luck is always AussieConIII : they were both good artists handy (ask M Tudor). Incidentally, your (my take is that this Award is more for Fan actual email contained the intriguing typo Cartoonist than for Artist-in-the-upper-case) "f'm sot in my ways", which will not endear with an excellent understanding of what you to Rodney Leighton, but will, of course, Fandom is all about, and with appropriate to me...JJ sensesof humor. [You say:] "I supposeI'll have to mention We really do need more people like that, the Fan Hugos. Congrats to File 770, to help keep us from taking ourselves (or probably the worthy winner of the bunch fandom) too seriously. nominated (although as I've indicated, there [You say:] "As to Fan Writer, how can were other perhaps equally deserving fnz anyone take this award at all seriously which didn't make the ballot)." anymore? Don't get me wrong, I've known Indeed -- many of them. Not to Put Down Dave Langford for a number of years, and any of the winners of the past few years, but yes, I do like him, but as has probably been all the "Fan category" Hugos were iffy from pointed out many times, one wonders what their inception, and in the past two decades meaning the award can have for him or (at a minimum) have gone downhill from anyone by now. Sort of a reverse Susan there. After all, they're based on Fanzines, Lucci. I suspect a cabal which votes the and (in general) Fanzines have too small a Deaf Man in every year just to generate circulation within the Hugo voting-base for some more tired editorial whining, and the results to be validly representative of retires to the bar giggling. So I'll shut up." what's actually being created. I think this is Again, as with the other Fan Hugos, something we all know and will just have to circulation plays much too large a part, I learn to live with (though of course this think... though in fact I have voted for doesn't preclude fannish complaining about fanzines and people partly on the basis of it). how well they've gotten their fannish [[The remark aboutfanzine circulation is attitudes out to a large number of people. so blindingly obvious now that you point it Still, my feeling is strong that two Hugos out - Ifeel a slap ofthe forehead and a huge (everyone can use a pair of bookends) "DUHU coming ofl, but I should have should be enough for anyone, and (though a derived the same point from other remarks bit less strong) that these (& other) Awards that Ansible is circulated so widely via should have a significant aspect of email it's perhaps likely that it's one of few encouraging the most talented newcomers, fanzines the "Hugo voting-base" may have as well as rewarding long-term

-23- accomplishments. (Actually, that last is easierwith little leisuretime, which means more applicable to the various Fan Travel little websurfingtime. " Funds,but....) SurelyLloyd jests. At least,l don'tknow [[I think it's pretty obvious to the fanzine any fan worthy of the name who would community thqt the Nova awards (in the acceptany other fan's evaluationof "The UK) and the FAAN awards (generally) are Top Fifty" (websitesor anythingelse) -- it's much more relevant within that communitv all too mucha matterof personalpreference. than the Hugos canprobably ever be...JJ A thoroughlycomprehensive Listing would Re Car Trouble. I really do wish you be good, I think (from the standpointof hadn't mentioned this. So far, the '83 Toyota someone who's really not comfortable seemsto be doing ok, but I'm starting to get browsingon the Web) but it would be cruel just a little bit nervous every time I take it to wish the responsibilityfor maintainingit out of the driveway. And, annoyingly, it on anyone. looks as though it'll be difficult to find a new [[From the ThisHere... website I only list model that has adequate space (though I threelinl

-24 - Lloyd also wrote: "I was seento be quite CentralAmerica traditionallybegins at the against alcohol at one time, but I was mostly southernborder of Mexico." againstits abusethrough overindulgence." It's as Marty says -- and, like you, my Oh, yes, the Images people form. After mind translates"North America" to "The expressing dislike of the heavy drinking U.S. & Canada",probably on a (primarily) once common in fandom ("a waste of fine linguistic and cultural basis rather than a fannish minds -- the fans I know are either purelygeographic one. obnoxious or boring when they're drunk" [Gary Deindorfer] wrote: "[...] I'm was about the way I put it) people kept readingand rereadingShakespeare plays - I being astonished when I drank two or thrree never tire of Big Willy. His insight into pints of beer during the course of a humannature is unparalleled,not to mention convention evening (which, back in those the beautiful,elevated language he puts into days, lasted about ten hours). Same thing the mouthsof his characters." happened-- after I'd raked some friends over Perhaps that's a general aspect of the coals for the Toklas Spaghetti Sauce ElizabethanEnglish Geo. Parkinson's they'd used at a club meeting (the host had a Paradisi in Sole (the Park in the Sun), on House Rule of "No external Drugs") -- for plantsand gardening,uses the samekind of g when I toked a passingjoint or pipe. elevatedlanguage, in what amountsto a [You wrote:] "I particularly noticed (and ReferenceTextBook for gardeners. took objection to) Rodney Leighton's About Milton Stevens,you wrote: "By assertionin Twink's loccol that "TAFF is the time I'd read your comment,I'd also [...] controlled by a clique". 140 total votes rcalized that Milt (and y'all) perhaps for Sue Mason in this year's ballot is far too assumedthat I knew he was a WASP,which many to suggesta "clique" of any kind." I didn't" Well... TAFF does seem to be rather Actually, I don't either,even after being largely influenced ("control" is probably too acquaintedwith him for manyyears. I don't strong a word for anything in fandom) by recall him ever mentioning religion, and the two most recent winners and perhaps a tendto assumethat, being highly intelligent, dozen other people (many of them previous he'sa White Anglo-SaxonAgnostic. winners), and that's probably a small enough f[The "More Amusing than WASP" group to be considered a clique. Much the acronym competition is now fficially same can be said about most other open...JJ organizations,however, and I don't think it's [Robert Lichtman] wrote: "I disagree necessarilysomething to be condemned. I'd with Arthur Hlavaty that we've'beenliving be more bothered by hearing that Lloyd in the post-musicalera for about30 years.' I Penney was told he was "an unsuitable agreewith Tim Leary that, at leastto some candidate" if I weren't already aware that extent, some people'smusical preferences almost everyone in fandom is capable of an are set by what they were listening to in occasional knuckleheadedness. The voting adolescence-- that'scertainly true for me, to base for TAFF isn't as large as I'd like, but a degree(that is, I enjoy that music, but I about the only "clique effect" I've noticed is alsolike lots of othermusic I didn't know as that people sometimes seem to have gotten an adolescen0-- but I don't think that we've together and agreedto give it to X this time gone 'post-musical.' I simply stopped and Y next time, thus ensuring that the less- paying attention to most of who was fannishly-popular Zisn't likely to win. recordingwhat a long time ago and I don't Marty Cantor wrote: "You say that go out andbuy muchrecorded music. When your mind translatesNorth America to mean I hearnew stuff on the radio, I enjoy some anything north of the Rio Grande. Your of it but I have no idea (unless it's mind needs new translating apparatus.The announced)who's doing the performing.I'm country of Mexico is in Nonh America. okaywith this."

-25 - Neither [[Just to make it perfectly clear, This do I agree Here,.. is editedsolely by me - Martin is the with UK publisherand as such has no editorial Hlavaty that input.Nor, I suspect,would he wantany...Jl we've "been BestFan Writer: I suspectthis is largelya living in the function of who gets the most coveragein post-musical fanzines - write one piece for a large era for about circulation mag and you're well aheadof 30 years."I thosewho appearin smallcirculation zines. have been Sotry, but pop music is one of my pet living in a hates.. I hatethe screaming,down-the-nose post-musical r$rga+ vocalsand the endlessthurnp thump of the are.,r'f age for c"{c€{+, hu\, 'backing'. I'm just an old fogey. Other $hq| {.r}r'g€+- *t+r:'s about that -- SlapigJ* dislikesare modern'poetry', and I'm afraid long, after wrestlingis out of my orbit. pretty much Nice load of LOCs and the frnz reviews ceasingto listen to pop music at aboutthe were good, but brief. All in all, a nicely ageof 35, as I think many peopledo, but a variedissue and something for everyone. vast number of younger people seem to almostcenter their lives on popularmusic... November I3 thoughperhaps Arthur would say "that'snot John Hertz writes: music,that's just noise". Theredo seemto Thanks for the wedding report and the be, however,at leasttwo APAs, with many rest of This Here... #6. I like your vivid, memberswho are closeto 50 yearsold that feisty writing. It's not clear to me if you have a lot of discussionof popular music, believeChristina Lake about Vanamonde- and some of the groups mentioned are whateverthat was, sinceshe didn't sendme currently-active& even new, so maybeit's a copy - but you'rewelcome to it, andI'll try not a good idea to generalizetoo much. not to be tortuous [[Your results may vary. Around 35 I Address listed in'Fqnzines received' beganlistening to a lot more countrymusic obviously unoware of Doug Bell (thoughadmittedly a lot of it waswhat might [[You're & Christina's excellent new zine Head, in be called alt-country lil@ Steve Earle), which the reviews are rated by er - becauseat that time I wasn't a lot of fnz - finding heads, heads (: stuff, newrock stuff I liked, and wasn'treal happy from five "Headline Not to be missed") down to one head (: with the output of some of the dinosaurs "Pess me a Vanamonde!").As I believe I've either. I got back into "classicrock" a for remarked, comments on APA mailings (if while, then more or less sidled into one is not a member of that APA) are really "alternativerock" while station-sur/ingand pretty uselessreading, but the original stuff have stayed there more or less since. I'm can merit (seereview)...JJ still enjoyingit...lI alwayshave

Novemberl7 November 12 Mark Plummer writes: Fromerg40@madasafi sh.com I say about This Terry Jeeveswrites: thought I'd something Here... #6, specifically that bit you read out Congratson the weddingand I liked that over the phone to me a couple of weeks cover photo, it cameout well. Having fwo back. However, looking at it again I find that editors to the mag must make things your responseto Alan Sullivan in the letter complicated,do you do half eachor do you column pretty much says everything I might do it all yourselfand mail copiesto Martin? have said on the subject. See, A Scott's

26- remarksabout your excessivecommentary supporter, clearly somebody who didn't areentirely justified. know much about the mechanicsof fan The history of the 'Tobes for the Doc funds and the alternatingnature of the trips, Weir' campaignso far as I recall is that it suggestedthat our man should of course startedas a joke (from Meike Benzler, I stand again next year. Actually*, I rather believe)but becameat least semi-serious like this idea:it would be a truly appropriate with the 1998Eastercon in Manchester.The gesturefor Tobes to enter the race on a key differencebetween this and the 'Tobes platformof travellingin the wrong direction for TAFF' campaign is the latter was and it's only a shamewe've now missedour essentiallyinclusive, exposing more people chance. to the TAFF ethos (cross-pollinationwith [[Yessssss!Somehow I rather like the Nichevo there - neat, huh?), whereasthe idea of a senuinespoof TAFF candidacy,if former seemedto me to be pretty much that isn't a contradictionin terms.The only destructivein intent.Ironically, and contrary problem I can see (boring rules again) is to what Alan says,it didn't really get people that Tobesactually has to promise to take voting - from what I recall,the overall vote the trip if elected...JJ was actuallysubstantially lower than in the Coming soon: LOCs on Arcows of previous year - and if there really was a Desire... 'fannishfurore' (insertas many 'h's into that *this word sponsored by Anders as arenecessary to keepAlan happy)then it Holmstrom. completelypassed me by. It provokedmild 14 Northway Road, Croydon, Surrey CR1 6JE, UK

December 2 From [email protected] Chris Murphy writes: So, you're up to issue #6 and you've won a Nova - congratulations. And you're married, for which congratulations again. Sorry to hear about all your bad luck ("Coincidence"). Perhapsthe demon who sabotagesMartin Tudor's existence has beentaking a transatlanticholiday with you. [[Er - I didn't actually win a Nova, but it's nice of you to think I did...JJ "Tunes"...well, yes..."Rasslin"'...um...ah, "Loco Citato", this I understand. There seems to be a debate going on over what Ted White said about Ardis Waters, which is outside my rather limited fannish scope. However I think it illustrates the power of any sex-relatedtopic to disturb people, even in thesesupposedly liberated days. I agree with your comment to Taras Wolanslry that "sports entertainment" is a fair description of American wrestling. At irritation,that's all. least it acknowledges that rasslin' is Which reminds me... After the showbiz. The world of "real" professional announcementof the result of TAFFrace sport is generally not so honest about its 2000,the outcomewas beingdiscussed on relationship with the media. some newsgroupor e-mail list. A Tobes

a1 As TAFF is the only fan fund I support milr directly, I was interested in the views expressedby Alan Sullivan and E B Joy V. Smith (Octoberl3): "I couldn'tnot sendmy Frohvet. RegardingSullivan's comments Best Wishesto you and the BlessedBobbie on your andyour response:there has always been an wedding. And [...] I want to say that I enjoy This Here..., and it has made me more appreciativeof anarchic, boozy element in fandom whose wrestling."; Lindsay Crawford (October 21): membershave as much right to stand for ",..beenoverwhelmed by all things domestic[...] TAFF as the rest of us. Whether a winner your zine is safely tucked away awaiting a quiet from the good-time tendency would be momentwhen I havetime to savorit."; Bill Bodden preparedto administerthe fund after his trip ${ovembersometime): "Am slowly working on Rnv Goof #3 but progressis glacial...";Julia Morgan- is possiblya more importantissue than the Scott(December l0) with a nicebunch of fan art; impact he might have on "complacent trufans". Onemajor obstacle for a candidate Frnzilnstocofrod [[Probably wise of me to note that all the following like Tobes is that we are still in the shadow were receivedin trade. I guess"the usual" is implied, of the Frost affair and the voters are unless otherwise noted. E-mail addressesnow understandablyreluctant to takerisks. inclu ded w her e known... issueof subsequentadministrative Apologies in advanceto anyonekind enoughto send [fThe but whogot missedout on this list. The responsibilities ,s a good point, though fanzines filing systemflarJl is not at its best...Jl again I think Tobesis being done a gross Ansible #159 - #162, Dave Langford, 94 London disserviceby any comparisonto Abi Frost. Road,Reading, Berkshire RGI 5AU, UK. He's certainly considered trustworthy [email protected] enough to be involved with convention The streakis over! Fareymentioned in #161 re: the committees, FanwriterNova tie. Bahl #162is necessarilybrief for for example.Robert Lichtman family reasons.David writes: "As some of you almostcertainly got it right (as usual)when alreadyknow, my father is nearingthe end of his he opined that Tobes'chonces of winning life." Sympathiesfrom me to you, Mr. Langford... TAFF would dependa fair bit on getting a BatteriesNot Included, Volume VII Issue8, $3 out over here, as much as US/$4 foreign, 130 W. LimestoneSteet, Yellow fanzine Springs,OH 45387,or [email protected]. Sent on by anything...lJ Rodney Leighton, it's a fan magazinefor the adult Frohvet says,"TAFF is gettingold," but film aficionado. then so are the fans. Looking aroundat the The Nova Scotian Hermit, Volume #2, Issue#: last Novacon,I estimatedthe averageage of FAFIA IS IMMINENT, Rodney Leighton, RR#3, those attending, not counting children Tatamagouche,N.S. BoK lV0, CANADA. As Rodneysez here, this is just a letter substitutehe broughtalong by their parents,to be about sendsout for zinesreceived. It detailssome of his 40. Is this just a British phenomenon,or is doings,and is not availablefor the asking.So don't American SF fandom greying as well? I ask. imaginethat the youngfans, if there arearry, It GoesOn The Shelf 22, Ned Brooks,4817 Dean mustbe goingto mediacons. Lane,Lilburn GA 30047-47 20. List of books received & people heard from, You ask in "Indulge Me" if "reality is includingthe questionof whetherIGOTS qualifies as sometimesoverrated". Maybe it is. I recalla a genzine. I think not. Random, eclectic and quotationfrom Brian W Aldiss to the effect interesting. that you can havetoo much of it. (He goes Jackpot!#2, #3, Arnie Katz, 330 S. DecaturBlvd., on to addthat Tolkien'swriting will block it PMB 152,Las Vegas NV 89107. Whatwith this, Amie & Tom Springer'sBaloney and out for months at a time, but I've never Joyce'sSmokin' Rockets,it's geuingtough to keep found that to be the case.) I love the photo up with LasVegrants of late... of the guy in the "bomb technician"t-shirt. Harry Plokta and the Blue Screen of Death Though he probably doesn'thave anything (Plokta 20), SteveDavies, 52 WestbourneTerrace, to do with bomb disposal,it soundslike the Reading,Berks RG30 2RP, UK; Alison Scott,24 St. you'd Mary Road, Walthamstow,London El7 9RG, UK; kind of humour needto stay sanein Mike Scott,9 JaggerHouse, Rosenau Road, London thatjob. swll4QY,uK.

-28 - More of the same from the (now Nova-winning) Raw Goof #1, #2, c/o SF3,PO Box 1624,Madison, cabal.It musthave been the CD... wr 5370r-1624 International RevolutionaryGardener #3, Judith Bill Bodden'schatty and inviting perzine.Short, but Hanna & Joseph Nicholas, 15 Jansons Road, assatisffing as a late-nightsnack. Tottenham,London N15 4ru, UK. The Mongolian Jird (June- Oct), Alan Sullivan,26 Hannapontificates at length on Barbie,and fails to ThornfordRoad, Lewisham, London SEl3 6SG,UK. engagemy interest,though other (female)reviewers More of Alan'snewsletter detailing people engaging had their chords struck by it. Joe's aside into the in severaltypes of activityof which RodneyLeighton movie Battle of Britain, however, generated an wouldnot approve. immediateLoC frommaisonFarey. The Knarley Knews #84, 1525 16h Ave., Grafton, Banana Wings 16, Claire Brialey, 26 Northampton wt 53024-2017,USA Road, Croydon, Suney CRO 7HA, UK; Mark [email protected] Plummer,14 NorthwayRoad, Croydon, Surrey CRO Anotherzine with a predictableloccol subject,in this 6JE,UK. caseremarks on GeneStewart's attack on the trufen [email protected]. co.uk egroupfrom #83.These are lively enough,and cover Back to normal after the Aussie travelogue,and up for the restof the materialwhich is actuallypretfy includesOy now somewhatdated) locs on the issue thin, though I enjoyed Henry's Editorial with its beforethat. Probably all the more enjoyableafter the combinedcamping, ChiCon, great grandma June and previous issue's density, and consistent quality Ditto trip report."I've decidedto makean extraeffort throughout.As usual, especiallyfrom the Sainted to write a bit morein eachissue", he says.I hopeso, Plummer(for TAFF, GUFF, Hugo, Nova, Paragon becauseapart from the locshis is by far the beststuff FanRoom Mascot etc...). here. Wabe #2, Bill Bodden,PO Box 762, Madison,WI Vanamonde #373#377, John Hertz, 236 S. 53701-0762;Tracy Benton, 108 Grand Canyon CoronadoSt., No. 409, Los Angeles,CA 90057, Drive, Madison,WI 53705;Jae Leslie Adams,621 USA. SpruceStreet, Madison, WI 53715. Of course,I skip all the APA-L comments(which is Ratherslight in someways, but extremelyenjoyable most of it) and skim most of the rest, but I haveto for all that. The transcriptionof JeanneGomoll's say that the one-paragraphaccount of a visit by GoH speechfrom Wiscon24 probablyovershadows RobinJohnson(#376) is strangelycompelling. the rest of the material. which is neverthelessall good. F'EATUREDFANZINES... Twink #19, E B Frohvet,4716 DdorseyHall Drive Barmaid #10, Yvonne Rowse, Evergreen, #506,Ellicott City, MD 21042. DY12 Sad to say, I found thish less interestingthan Halls Farm Lane, Trimpley, Worcs previous ones, although I rather liked Frohvet's lNP, UK. modest Worldcon report and Wm. Breiding's [email protected]. co. uk "ScienceFiction and the CrankyFan". Also contains Aargh! I have a mis-collatedissue which that rara avis: A LoC from Mark Plummer! apparentlyhas somemissing pages(which Contained the ballot for "Fandom's Resident advise Curmudgeon".This Here... supportsD West (write- are unnumberedso it's difflcult to in). which) and some twice. However, a nice Stet #9, Dick & LeahSmith, 410 W. Willow Road, "postcard-style" review of Corflu, a ProspectHeights, IL 60070-1250 strangelyincomprehensible piece 'Master of Anotherlate arrival, with apologiesfrom the Smiths, Quick Wit and ReadyRepartee'which ends 'TheOld Fan'sAlmanac'has, I'm sure,been lauded at joke Annual#1, andmost of lengthelsewhere. Anything I might sayor addwould with a from Viz eitherbe superfluousor anticlimatic.Suffrce to say, a review of what appears to be an essentialissue. .Missing pages,as I said. A Gloss #2, Lilian Edwards,39 Viewforth, Edinburgh JohnBerry reprint fills out an issueYvonne EHl0 4EJ,UK and Victor Gonzalez(CoA) 9238 4In admits was huniedly put together for Ave. SW,Seattle WA 98106,USA. [email protected] Novaconoand it shows. Apart from the [email protected] central piece, though, the rest is clear Predictablydominated to a certain extent by Ardis evidence of why Yvonne has won the Watersrelated correspondence, nevertheless a good FanwriterNova two yearsin a row. Ask for build on #1, with Victor's jovially written TAFF Barmaidby name,but hopeyou get the one pitch, predictions Lilian's Nova award in her usual right pages. gossipy fanzine review style, and excellent with all the contributionsby Dave Hicks and the now seemingly ubiquitousYlva Sp&ngberg.

-29 - Head#2, DougBell & ChristinaLake, 12 toothsomegoodies here - enoughto make HatherleyRoad, Bishopston,Bristol BS7 you want to try the otherdishes on the table 8QA,UK. on the assumptionthat they'll be at leastas head@headwest. fsnet. co. uk appealing.If any aren'tquite to your taste, Mostly too good to miss, though I felt the don't worry - somethingelse will be right acrophobicDick Walters' account of his along.Oh, and don't mentionfood to Marty bungeejump (alsothe longestpiece) seemed - it couldbe a touchysubject. a little out of place. Needlessto say, I enjoyedthe musicbits (Dougand Christina's Once again, reiterated apologies from moi for any separate fanzines not listed here. I read'em all, believe you articleson a rather strangefestival me... event),but Tony Berry's report andthe origin of the DeathWish cocktailby Holmstrdm and Spangberg(there she is again) definitely pass muster. I draw a modestveil over the fanzinereviews. Aw, Muluotlo... no I don't - Doug thinks I'm great,and I can only reciprocate(more so sincewe actually 5 Whateverhappened to Curved Air? Or got to have a propertalk at Novacon).See HazelO'Connor, come to that... you downthe boozerthen, mate. ...and stuff #4, Doug Bell, s addressas Waiting for the Blessed One to collect above. me after a Monday night DWI aftercare [email protected] session (or "drunk school", as I call it), I I think reasons (and one of the I like Doug looked up into the cold, clear sky, and it his "stuff') is that he remindsme of me to a occurred to me that the stars look the same certain perhaps extent, or a "me" I wish from the jailhouse parking lot as they do in might have young existed when I were a the restof the county... whippersnapperhis age(cue Yorkshiremen). s Eruditebut laddishat the sametime, andfull The following is a direct quote from a of beans.Wait till I get you to my local, handout from d*unk+eheel my aftercare Doug - draught Bass and Guinness in program. The number ninety-six is not a Maryland, no less. (Yes, that's an open misprint: invitation). "Expertsclaim that fully 96 percentof all No Award #8, Marty Cantor, 11825 Americansare codependents(we would say Gilmore Street#105, North Hollywood CA adult-children)because they comefrom one 91606,USA of three family situations that foster this [email protected] condition: If Raw Goof (qv) is the late-night snack, "1. are in love or marriagerelationship thenNo Award is the buffettable - not really with an alcoholic, groaning with rich food, but certainly "2. haveone or more alcoholicparents or providing a grand selection of satisfying grandparents,or comestibles.Thom Digby providesthe sharp "3. Grew up in an emotionallyrepressive salsa,there's an unusualrecipe from the late family." Joe Mayhew, more rib-sticking fare from I wonder who the other 4% are? Milt Stevens (on Dhalgren) and Joseph Anybodyadmiuing it? Major (on Katz & Springer's Baloney). 5 There are lighter, but no less lip-smacking Tunes!Additional: Three Bs and an R of treatsfrom the cookbooksof Norris, Sneary GoodStuff... and Cantorhimself, and anothersouffl6 of ButterJlybyCrazy Town Califannishhistory by Len Moffat, for those Babylonby David Gray who like that sort of thine. Plentv of BlackJesus by Everlast

-30- Renegadesof Funk by Rage Against the tlFafla Machine... ThisHere... is an occasionalperzine by Nic s Farey. You got this rag for one of the And Hangingby a Momenlby Lifehouse, following (usual)reasons: too, actually. o You gaveor sentme a zine(or will) s o You haveLoCced (or will) I'm not sure exactly why, but I really o You boughtalcohol (or will) dislikethe word s "copacetic". o I know whereyou live (or will) Thish sh€utd may rcach you before the Publishedin the UK by: closingdate for TAFF voting (January31't). Martin Tudor After careful consideration,This Here... 24 RavensbourneGrove, throws its weight behind No Preference, Willenhall, both candidatesbeing equallyworthy. Send W.Midlands,WVl3 llil(, UK

And in the USA by: Nic Farey POBox 178 St.Leonard, MD 20685,USA

Distributor/publishersfor othercountries are invited to apply. (Are you listening,Bruce?)

REMEMBERz ThisHere is availableby e- mail as a Word attachment from nfarey@,comappspec.com,ffid that's a lot cheaperfor moi. Issuesalso appear(in a slightly different format) on the web at: Thereyou are,then. http://www.meespace.com/arts/thishere E-LoCs are preferred (cut and paste, y'know), but don't let that put you off, unless yolu really can't find the pencil, otherwiseUSA address,please. This Here may be distributedfreely, unless you can find someone dumb enough to actuallypay for it, in which caseour cut is o'adrink". " Hookme up a newrevolution, 'causefhis oneis a lie. We saf aroundlaughing and wafched fhe last one die..."

- 3l -