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Monday 22 October 2007 Published By The USSU Comms. Office. Issue Number 1113 FREE - Est. 1967 www.ussu.co.uk barefThea University of Surreycts Students’ Newspaper In this 24 page edition: Extreme Makeover : HRB Edition By the barefacts News Team FANCY A FLIRT? WHAT’S ON THIS The Students’ Union has commissioned new designs for Students have been asked to voice their opinions a remodel and refurbishment of Youngs Kitchen from the using the Union website. The plans are also on display FORTNIGHT? same architect who performed a similar task at Leeds in the Union building, where any other information GRAPEVINE University Union. The plans for the Kitchen – more widely about them can be retrieved. Alex Collins, President known around campus as the HRB or the Helen Rose Bar of the Union, said about the new plans: “We’re trying – aim to transform the area into a more social space. to use the space in the Students’ Union to provide a flexible area for students to use, and one that will last Although the initial ideas envision a small bar where for years to come.” the existing bar stands, the main idea behind the new proposals, the Union claims, is to place less emphasis PAGES 12 &13 on alcohol sales. Catering facilities would still be available under the plans, and the current DJ booth ALL THE LATEST ON would be converted into a seating space with disabled THE SITUATION IN access, which would be available in the area for the BURMA first time. PAGE 2 The architect’s plans have been modelled to mimic a domestic living space and provide a homely environment. The inner walls will be fitted with plasma FEELING THIRSTY? displays, and the outside walls with large glass sections PG TIPS to let in natural light.

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TASTY TREATS PAGE 6

CAN YOU BEAT THE PUZZLE LORD? Police give students a detour By the barefacts News Team identified, said in an open letter: “We “We quickly sobered up and are Freshers, and… in our second admitted what we had done and Last week, fines totalling £240 were handed week, we took part in a heavy pub after prolonged police interrogation out to three 18-year-old University of Surrey crawl, visiting lots of bars and clubs were issued with Fixed Penalty students who admitted removing two road around Guildford… unfortunately Notices of £240 in total”, they said. signs and damaging another in Walnut Tree we took things one step too far and The penalties have caused a dent Close at around 1.30am on September 26. decided to take a few souvenirs of in the students’ finances and resulted The three were issued with the evening to remember it by.” in short-term criminal records. Their Penalty Notices for Disorder The students were spotted taking actions could have ended up with FIND OUT PAGE 16 incurring an £80 payment each the road signs by CCTV cameras them having a court appearance for causing the criminal damage. around the town and were picked up and exclusion from the University. The students, who didn’t want to be in Walnut Tree Close by the police. Cont Page 5

Societies | Page 20 - barearts | Page 17 - Puzzles | Page 16 - pictures say it all | Page 8 [email protected] barefacts 2 EDITORIALS 22 October 2007 editorial>Gareth Giles: Editor

Welcome to the new and (hopefully) improved, barefacts! Well, thanks for reading, anyway. I hope you’ll enjoy every First, a quick introduction. I’m Gareth, and I’m a second year single copy of barefacts this year. If you do, I will be accepting Politics student. I have a few aims for barefacts this year, and donations in the form of alcohol. If you don’t, I will be however much of a cliché this may be, I need your help to accepting donations in the form of alcohol. achieve them. Firstly, this is your paper – by the students, for the students. This means you can change it. If you have any suggestions, there are loads of ways to contact us. E-mail us, message board us, write to us, or even drop into the Union and see us – we’re there a lot of the time! We’re always happy to hear feedback, good or bad. Secondly, get involved! Anyone can take part in the student paper. We always need new articles, so take a look through this issue and get inspired to write. Even if you don’t want to write, your tip-offs about stories could be the difference between the paper of the year and one no-one reads. E-mail our Newsdesk! editorial team 1113 editorial>Claire Worgan EDITOR |GARETH GILES

MARKETING CO-ORDINATOR | AARON SALINS | [email protected] I hope you enjoy the new look barefacts! EDITOR-IN-CHIEF | ALEX COLLINS | [email protected]

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The views expressed within the paper are those of individual authors and do not necessarily represent the views of the Editor, the University of Surrey Students’ Union or the University of Surrey. This publication may not be reproduced in whole or in part, stored in any form, copied or distributed, without the express permission of the publisher beforehand.

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WWW.USSU.CO.UK/BAREFACTS © USSU COMMUNICATIONS OFFICE 2007 barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 NEWS 3 Students Demonstrate for Burma The monks may be the main focus of the current demonstrations in Burma What can be done? but students played a prominent role in the last major protests in the It’s important to keep the pressure and spotlight on Burma. Talk to people country in 1988. Many are now prominent members of exile groups and are about it, write to your elected representatives. People can ﬁnd out which pro-democracy activists, joining The National League for Democracy (NLP). companies are investing in the country and email and phone them to The NLP carried on in deﬁance of the crackdown until the Junta brought pressurise them to leave. Total and Chevron are two companies that have the protests to a halt. The Junta shut universities down three weeks ago and been the focus of current protests. The next big event is on October 24, there are no reports to say they’re open again. with candle-lit vigils taking place around the world.

Activist death . Students and pro-democracy campaigners have been detained, tortured and killed. Win Shwe, a prominent NLD acitivst was 23 in the ‘88 protests. He was arrested on September 26 and tortured to death. The Junta refused to return his body to his family and instead cremated it to remove any evidence of torture.

Facebook protest movements Johnny Chatterton, one of the organisers of the campaign against HSBC, was contacted by Alex Bookbinder, who founded the ‘Support the Monks Protest in Burma’ group. To make the group more effective, Johnny joined the Burma Campaign Group and played a prominent role in organising last week’s UK day of action, including the London protest.

A beat for Burma, a song for Myanmar, as London rocks to the sound of freedom By Mike Blakeney

I pulled on my bright green “University of Surrey Students’ Union” emblazoned shirt, and red jumper; red to signify blood, monks, and the Saffron Revolution. When I arrived at my destination, Pimlico Station, London, I could see the crowds amassing. Red, saffron, sanguine, coated the street, History of student led banners soaring through the air imploring everyone to listen and hear their cries for liberty. demonstrations in Burma I spoke to people - hardened veteran campaigners from the Free Burma Campaign, to first Burmese students have played an enormous role in the timers; from the NUS, to Burmese refugees. struggle for democracy in Burma. Then it began, winding through the streets of London. We chanted “Free Free, Burma Burma,” as we crossed the bridge towards parliament. “UK Government,” we chanted, “take action on Burma!” We turned and passed Downing Street, and were met by Buddhist monks, fresh from On July 7 1962, students at Rangoon University protested meeting Prime Minister Gordon Brown. again Ne Win’s newly formed military regime. Ne Win ordered On the stage at Trafalgar Square emerged a beautiful lady, in her 20’s, who recalled the story of troops to enter the building to end the protest. Over 100 how she was made a refugee from her own country. There were impassioned pleas from MEPs students were killed and the student union building was and parliamentarians. Stories of torture and cruelty, murder and death. blown up. I tried to remember the pictures of monks, dead by the side of the Irrawaddy, the river that flows In 1998, protests about the economic crisis were started by through the Burmese capital, Rangoon, making it look more reminiscent of the Styx. Burma’s students. On the 13 March 1988, students protested As the talks came to a close and the crowds dispersed, I could see the flag of South Africa, outside the Rangoon Institute of Technology and clashed with billowing in the breeze. Apartheid was overcome, through trial and toil, and so must the Junta in the military. Burma be. We did change the world that day. The UN Security Council released a statement saying it, “strongly deplores the use of violence against peaceful demonstrators” in Burma and calls on A student was shot dead and his death triggered further the Junta and all other parties “to work together toward a de-escalation of the situation and a protests, with ordinary citizens and Burma’s monks joining peaceful solution.” in. On 8 August 1988, hundreds of thousands of people took The organisers reported 10,000 turning up to chant, sing, and pray for the lives of the dead, dying part in protests across the country, calling for democracy. The and forgotten, in Burmese prisons. junta closed universities to prevent them becoming a rallying point for the pro-democracy movement. A step in the right direction, along a long march to freedom, for the Burmese people. [email protected] barefacts 4 News 22 October 2007 editorial>News Team KNOW YOUR LEFT FROM RIGHT Kathryn Medien: studying for a BA in Politics. By the barefacts News Team Ben Miller: studying for an MA in International Politics The press fling the words left and right around articles almost interchangeably, Jamie Fletcher: studying for a LLB in Law with International Studies with little definition. These key concepts can be difficult for the non-political reader to grasp, disenfranchising them from the political press.

Join the news team and shape the news agenda at university. You’ll be able to Right wing: A person who describes themselves or another as right wing investigate and report on what’s affecting students’ lives, goings on in the local projects that person to be a supporter community and the latest national and international news. The news team offers you of traditional values. The right wing is the chance to develop your research, interviewing and writing skills. If you like stories, associated with the Conservative Party in searching for facts and investigating the truth then join the team. Alternatively, if you the United Kingdom and Republicans in have a story you want to contribute, please get in touch. the United States of America. Right wingers tend to support free market economics, the existing social order and a cautioner Email: [email protected] approach to change. Left wing: Those who are labelled ‘left wingers’ usually support progressive policies based on redistributive principles. Cont From Page 1 In the United Kingdom the labour movement has been closely tied with left wing politics, while in the United The Student Union is leading SSHH! – Silent Students Happy Homes. The campaign, States the left is best associated with the Democratic Party. Historically left in partnership with Surrey Police and Safer Guildford Partnership, is designed to wingers are associated with higher taxes for public services (NHS), the welfare reduce noise, rowdy behaviour and minor damage in residential areas around the state and trade unionism. university during the early hours.

Ashley Murray, Vice President Welfare of the Students’ Union, who is leading the campaign said: “The Students’ Union is strongly reinforcing the SSHH! campaign BAREFACTS following two successful years of SSHH! The Students’ Union launched the campaign in 2005 and it saw a dramatic impact on disruptive behaviour in the local area.” BEAT OUT BBC

by the barefacts News replaced with cold food.” Team Mr Giles said to barefacts. “Parents were written to barefacts showed its media the same day to explain clout last week, when it what happened. It is a won the battle with several measure of how supportive media outlets, including the our parents are that to the BBC, to get a comment from best of my knowledge, out Nigel Giles, headteacher of of 400 parents, there has Unis Go Green Chalkstone Middle School been only one complaint.” By Ben Boden and Technology College in The parasites, which have

People and Planet believes that if we are to avert disastrous impacts of Climate change, the UK needs Haverhill, Suffolk. The small made national headlines, are to ensure Green House emissions are irreversibly declining by 2015. The ‘Go - Green Campaign’ school has been embroiled believed to be a type of moth launched by People and Planet at Freshers’ Fair is a campaign designed to look at the university’s impact in controversy when it larvae that are not killed on the surrounding environment. The Campaign aims to firstly employ full-time staff dedicated to environment management. This means was revealed that during by cooking. Alex Collins, that the university’s environmental impact would be constantly supervised by these staff. the cooking of a curry President of the Students’ Secondly it aims to construct an environmental review of all the university environmental impacts such as its CO2 emissions, its light pollution and its recycling. for school dinner on the Union, commented about Thirdly the campaign will produce and implement an official environmental policy which should be 8th October, maggot-like barefacts’ pursuit of the publicly accessible to all students. It should also rule out any loop holes and get out clauses, such as ‘not parasites were found in story, saying “Once again, financially viable,’ that the university may use to push back or ignore these environmental the rice. The rice, supplied barefacts has managed issues. to Suffolk County Council to uncover facts about a Lastly it also aims to reduce energy use and related emissions of green house gasses. by a reputable supplier, is story which no-one else Getting the university to use green renewable now under examination has managed to get. This energy is a large part of this. by environmental health just goes to show how If you feel like helping out you can either sign our petition sheets which are around campus, officers at Forest Heath well respected the Surrey or come to one of our meetings to either help District Council. “The meals Students’ newspaper is, out or voice your opinion. Meetings take place on Wednesdays at TB12 at 6pm every week. were withdrawn as soon as locally and nationally.” Your support will help us make a greener, the larvae were seen, and barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 LETTERS & NEWS 5

famous and a man in a very A Freshers nice white suit. By and large everyone met everyone and Perspective the next morning I awoke A Few Words From The with more new numbers in my By Andy Vale phone than people I actually Top... remember meeting. I’m sure “So this is Uni, they were all charming. A Regular Column by And what have I done? Unfortunately the Freshers’ Alex Collins, Another school over, Fayre was scheduled for the USSU President A new one has begun!” next day. Despite starting in the afternoon I still found So what does ask a question, but also meant I didn’t Is what has been running the combination of noise, a president do buy a drink for about 3 weeks, and was through my mind lately. The people, balloons and other that makes any referred to as “superman” because cushy confines of ‘the nest’ various stimulants didn’t difference to apparently I was everywhere! have been well and truly have the desired effect of you? Hopefully this column should give The National Student Survey told flown, and I intrepidly venture giddy excitement during my you an insight into my role and what I us that we need to improve on out to discover a world of mercilessly hung-over state. get up to in the Students’ Union! Assessment and Feedback and as a lectures, launderettes and Nevertheless, I persevered and It’s been an eventful first few months result a new strategy has been put into food labels bereft of pictures signed up for more societies for me, I graduated in Business place to specifically target this and to and adjectives. Every ounce of than I ever plan on attending - Management this year and had about 3 ensure the feedback you get is timely, excitement is served with a but you never know who may weeks off before starting my and taking allows you to understand how you can dash of nerves and dollops of hold a BBQ. over officially at the start of July. I don’t improve and why you got that mark. confusion; it sure keeps you As has been mentioned think the saying “sink or swim” has ever We are also changing the regulations on your toes. plenty of times before, the been more appropriate and it has been for UG level to wipe out the variability Luckily we are provided great thing is that no-one else a challenge with different obstacles between different courses. with a whole week in which really knows anyone either each and every day! It only seems like I We have also made some changes to gather our bearings, make so there are no real social have just started and already it is only in the commercial side of the students a few friends and lose any barriers at this stage. It’s 68 days until Christmas! union. We are looking to develop HRB jitters that may have hindered easy to see how a one time Moving in day was a major success as you will see on the cover and please our progress. In this time we Billy-no-mates could suddenly this year moving everyone in, along send your thoughts on this project. We are provided with timetables, increase his social standing with 5000 bits of luggage, 14 ironing are also hoping to give chancellors a directions and a tree’s worth sevenfold overnight in such an boards, 3 sets of weights (1 weights facelift at Christmas. We also launched of leaflets from the Student environment. bench), 16 guitars, but no beds this the new Bookshop in September, a Union (or ‘Happy Propaganda’ Unfortunately this year! You may have seen me in the joint venture between the University as I call it). All of this is useful merriment must end. Freshers main car park directing the traffic! and the Students’ Union. Finally we and certainly goes someway to is over and I now find myself – didn’t quite realise how sunny it was have launched a new Chinese/Korean encourage calm in the panic- imminently facing a four and the next day I had that experience, Union Shop in the Students’ Union ridden Fresher, although I year Maths degree. How where each time you smile or frown building. would prefer a foot massage. am I feeling? Bricking it, to you feel like you have just had a Botox Please get in touch if you have any I’d had friends go to Uni be honest! However, I have session! I delivered over 40 presentations questions or fancy a chat about the and tell stories of horrifically noticed that there are people Students Union. Email/MSN: Ussu. drunken escapades; my first in their final years of my in the first few weeks of term, if you [email protected] Phone: 01483 encounter of this was seeing course who still appear to be saw me, sorry! – I tried to make it 689227 Skype: Ussu.president BLOG: someone in a most un- alive and healthy, so I suppose as interested as possible. Talking to www.ussu.co.uk/president gentlemanlike state in the there’s not too much to over 3000 students helped to ensure little boys room of Rubix at worry about. I suppose its just people recognised me so they could about 10 on the first night. like school, but bigger. Nothing particularly new to me (I come from Woking, sorry). The same guy had been trying to ‘rope me in’ on the dance floor about 3 minutes Letters to barefacts previously. He was obviously suffering from my polite Letters must be received by Friday 28th Oct rejection. to guarantee A few nights later I went on their presence in the next newspaper - my first departmental pub [email protected] crawl, which was certainly Letters may be edited for length or clarity. an ice-breaker. There were [email protected] some obvious drinking games as well as a fine tour of Guildford, a girl who looked barefacts. be heard. [email protected] barefacts 6 Food 22 October 2007 Heya! I’m the food page editor this year. I’m a final year Nutrition student. I editorial>Verity Kirkpatrick want the food page to include delicious recipes, suggestions to make vegetables Food Editor tastier, restaurant reviews and nutrition articles. To get involved e-mail your recipes, reviews and thoughts to [email protected]. Makes Enough For Two Ingredients: Chocolate fudge brownies 250g deseeded pumpkin flesh, cut in to cubes Makes 16 1tbsp olive oil 1 small onion, chopped finely Ingredients: 1 garlic clove, finely chopped 140g butter 3 tbsp chopped fresh parsley 4 eggs beaten 1/5 tsp nutmeg 350g brown sugar 120ml vegetable stock 1 tsp vanilla extract 60g lean back bacon, cut in to strips Pinch of salt Tagliatelle 150g tagliatelle 75 g cocoa powder 75ml single cream 140 plain flour with pumpkin salt and pepper to taste 50 white chocolate cut in to small pieces Parmesan cheese to serve 50g dark chocolate cut in to small pieces Square cake tin approx 9” wide by 2” deep lined with foil

Method: Method: Melt butter in saucepan and leave to cool Heat oil in large saucepan and fry the garlic and onion for 5 Preheat oven to 170º C/gas mark 3 minutes. Gently beat eggs and sugar in a mixing bowl until no Add ½ the parsley, pumpkin, nutmeg and seasoning and fry lumps remain for 3 minutes. Stir in cooled butter and vanilla Add the stock, cover and simmer for 10 minutes until Sift salt cocoa and flour in to bowl and mix together. pumpkin is tender. Fold in the chocolate pieces Cook the tagliatelle according to the packet instructions and Pour in to prepared cake tin drain. Bake in oven for 35 minutes (or until knife inserted Add the bacon to the pumpkin pan and continue to cook for midway between centre and side comes out clean) 3 minutes. Remove brownies and foil from pan, cut in to squares Add the cream and spoon the sauce over pasta. and store in airtight container for up to a week. Sprinkle with remaining parsley and parmesan cheese. Rushes What is it? Smaller self clearing restaurant between lecture theatres and the library Opening times: Open 8am-3:30pm Cooked Breakfast available Places to eat on campus 8-11am, Baguette bar open 11-2pm Food and prices: Cooked breakfast £1.70 for 4 items. Lunch choices include traditional food with chips, the pizza baguette, pre-prepared sandwiches and snacks and the baguette bar Chancellors where you chose your bread, filling and salad and watch it all getting put What is it? Main campus bar / restaurant Opening times: Weekdays 8:30am- together £2.35 for 1 filling and 3 salad. 11pm, food served till 7:30pm. Open weekends Food and prices: Breakfast menu till 11:30 with cooked breakfast £3 and cheaper options such as the breakfast wrap £1.50. Young’s Kitchen Wider choice of main meals than other campus restaurants, priced £4-5. What is it? Oriental canteen style restaurant in HRB Opening times: 9am- Lighter options such as sandwiches, jackets, nachos and burgers £2-£3.50. 4pm weekdays, 10am-3pm Saturday Food and prices: Stir fried meat and Bonuses Licensed bar, music, accepts cards on transactions over £5 vegetable choices and spring roles served with rice and salad. Prices £4.50 for 2 choices and rice. Bonuses free water! Seasons What is it? Large canteen style, self-clearing restaurant with area for eating Wates House packed lunches Opening times: 8am-2:15pm Food and prices: Serves cereal What is it? Postgraduate and staff centre near the Cathedral. Pub like and continental breakfast until 11am. For lunch salad bar, roast dinner, atmosphere. Food ordered from bar and collect when you number is called. traditional foods with chips and international section with Indian/Chinese/ Opening times: Lunch served 12-2pm, evening menu served 2:30 –10pm Italian dishes and Pasta King. Main meals £2.50-£4.50. Vegetarian choices and Food and prices: Cooked breakfast - 5 items £2.50, Jacket potatoes £2.20, snacks/desserts also available Bonuses free water! salads £4.95, burgers and curry £4.15 vegetarian choices available. Bonuses Pool tables, available for private hire. barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 Science 7 editorial>Emma Rogulska Introducing the new and improved science section from your newly elected science Science Editor editor, ta da! I just wanted to let everybody know who I am and what my plans are for Barefacts’ the science column this year. My name’s Emma, I’ve been at Surrey for four years having graduated with a Physics BSc in June. I thought about getting a job but decided to come back for more! I’m now studying for a Medical Physics MSc in my spare time around editing the Barefacts science section.

Now, you would expect science to mean complicated and boring techno-babble? – Oh no my friends, that is one thing it won’t be this year! I have lined up a number of fun and interesting new features that despite being science orientated should be relevant/ useful to Surrey students. This will include a Hoax Buster column to combat false information and random science facts that can be strategically quoted when you need to sound smart.

Most of all I really want to encourage student interaction and participation in the science column. So if you know about a cool science event going on, let me know or RandomFacts Hoax Buster

1,700 tons of steel were used to build There are many emails containing health warnings bouncing around the web, detailing the London Eye, the equivalent weight various medical dangers and urging you to inform those you care about and many of of 250 double decker buses. them are completely false! But do not fear – hoax buster is here to set you straight on Enough energy is saved by whether it’s science or scare mongering that you’re being sent. recycling one aluminium can, to run a TV set for three hours Hoax Buster Case 1: The Myth of the Plastic Bottle Dioxins. or to light one 100 watt bulb for 20 hours. This particular myth made its debut in 2004 in the form of a letter. It warned that public health researchers in the states had The sensors on the feet of a red found that freezing plastic water bottles caused the release of admiral butterﬂy are 200 times carcinogenic dioxins. more sensitive to sugar than the human tongue. This is an urban legend as there are no known dioxins in plastics. Dioxins are a very speciﬁc group of chemicals primarily produced A goldfish is the only animal by incineration of material. Though they can be produced that can see in certain manufacturing processes, as in the production of both infrared pesticides, the majority of dioxins in existence have occurred naturally.

Using one of the In addition to the fact that there are no dioxins in plastic to be released into bottled world’s largest water, chemicals do not diffuse as readily in cold temperatures. So freezing would radiotelescopes, actually limit the release of any chemicals from plastic bottles. British scientists People should in fact be more conscious of the quality of the have analyzed an interstellar water they are drinking than the container it is coming from. gas cloud and calculated that it Municipal drinking water is much more stringently regulated contains enough alcohol to make than bottled water, which can legally contain many things that 400 trillion trillion pints of beer! are not tolerated in tap water. This having been said, don’t be afraid of drinking water, you are more likely to suffer from the adverse side effects of dehydration than from traces of chemical contaminants in bottled water or from the tap. Allied bombers were issued with Information for this article taken from John Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health, Public Health News Letter biro pens as fountain pens leaked at Featuring Rolf Halden, PhD, PE, assistant professor in the Department of Environmental Health Sciences and the Center high altitude. for Water and Health at the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health. [email protected] 8 Features

editorial>Amul Gurung Fancy Features Ed Yourself As It is that time of the year to say goodbye to the editors who are no longer with us. Similarly, the a Bit Of A features section had to say goodbye to Sophie and Saffron, who brought us tears and laughter with Stud or a great articles and reports week after week. It is almost honourable to hold such a position, and I hope I can continue their great success. With the start of the new academic year, I wanted to try new honey? ideas for our newspaper. Starting from this issue, we will be securing a whole page of pictures which Enter Yourself Or A can include events, activities and the goings-on of our university. Also if you have anything to comment on anything at all, we wil be re-opening our public forum, Room 101. friend Contact Amul At: ussu.barefacts@surrey. [email protected] ac.uk A Simple Guide: How to Not Fall Asleep in Lectures By Amul Gurung “I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I’m awake, you know?” Ernest Hemingway had said that, exposing his passion for the human mind’s necessity for sleep. We all love sleeping, whether it is sleeping drunk, sleeping with your partner(s), sleeping with your pets, sleeping in the bathtub, or just down right sleeping in your lectures. I know, listening to your lectures can be daunting sometimes, and for some of you, every time. But when the winter exams crawl in, and you are busy revising, you may always ﬁnd yourself kicking yourself for sleeping through all your lectures and paying no attention at all. But fear thee not - barefacts to the rescue! This is a guide on how to not fall asleep in your lectures, with these 3 simple steps.

1. Early to bed, early to rise! Yes, it doesn’t hurt you to sleep early. Many students are used to go to sleep around 3 in the morning. Any special reasons? None at all! Sometimes we ﬁnd ourselves doing absolutely nothing at all, but still up in those early hours. Therefore, it is wiser in long term to sleep than watching the same movie again and again for four times till four in the morning, and sleeping through all your lectures the following day.

2. Caffeine anyone? Caffeine is a xanthine alkaloid compound that acts as a psychoactive stimulant in humans. Yes, I copied that from Wikipedia (you know you love it). Well, coffee, red bull and colas are always a good option to keep your eyes open on those three hour lectures which lasts like a year. But be aware, it is highly addictive and may cause sleeping disorders. You’ve been warned.

3. Beat ‘em up Well, there is no hardcore beating involved, but some sort of violence is required for this option. However, you will need a buddy, a mate, a friend who you can trust. A small amount of planning is involved. You will be required to brief your partner in crime Why Does Chocolate Feel So Good? to pinch you, slap you, punch you, or do whatever it takes to keep you awake. But, it requires stealth and diligence. Sitting all alone by yourself is not advisable.

These are just three simple steps to take if you ﬁnd yourself snoring like a lion through your lectures. We know lectures can be boring and tedious; but it is what we chose to do. And those lectures will contribute in our learning one way or another in the future. On that very stupidly serious note, I am off to sleep, and hope you have a good night as well.

www.bfa cts.co.uk barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 FEATURES 9 The University in Pictures

If you want to submit any photos Email: [email protected]

Why Does Chocolate Feel So Good? By Verity Kirkpatrick released from it rather slowly due to the fat content, putting it on par with foods like pasta. Chocolate also contains more of the B vitamins needed for Chocolate manufacturers keep telling you that chocolate can bring happiness energy metabolism weight for weight compared with pasta, making potentially by increasing seretonin levels, and it could, as it is high in tryptophan and a better energy source. sugar. But it’s not the only food. Pleasure endorphins can be released when you eat chocolate if you like the A piece of chocolate does lessen hunger and raise mood more than an taste, smell and melted texture. However, they are also released when you apple but the effects are relatively short lived. As it is a high fat food eating it eat other foods you like, so try reaching for another favourite snack rather can be followed by feelings of guilt, which lower mood. To lessen some guilt, than chocolate. chocolate products If eating chocolate reminds you of good times, such as Christmas and with less fat per 100g birthdays, it can make you feel good. Think about whether you have any than chocolate bars other foods that you associate with fun memories as they may have the include; chocolate ice same effect on you. Some top Surrey student memory foods include; potato cream and chocolate wedges, nachos and jelly ‘n’ ice cream. cake. Looking forward to things can also improve mood. Instead of looking forward to a chocolate treat think of other things to look forward to, such as Therefore a bit of pampering and partying with friends and get happiness from those thoughts chocolate is fine as it instead. will make you feel good Satisfying a chocolate craving can feel pleasurable and chocolate can be as and you won’t feel too comforting as a duvet food for some. Myths also exist about chocolate having guilty afterwards, but aphrodisiac properties, but myths are all they are. think of other foods You may feel that chocolate makes you feel good by giving you an that you enjoy and energy boost, and this is true, but unlike popular thinking the sugar is actually could make you happy. [email protected] barefacts 10 FEATURES 22 October 2007 Almost Accurate Astrology What Does Your Week Have In Store? Pisces (February 21 - March 20) Someone you admire shall come to you Leo (21 July - 20 August) this week, so make sure you carry a People are apt to try to hit camera wherever you go! Don’t overdo it you square on the head with on appearances as some people prefer you their ideas and thoughts as you are, not who you pretend to be. today, so be ready for the Lucky Number: 9 onslaught of information that may to come your way. Aries (March 21st - April 20) It may be advantageous for You might wish to accomplish as much as you to listen to their entire possible before the date. Pushing things chatter before you retort forward is unlikely to be difficult over the with your own facts and next few days. Meeting your coursework emotions. deadlines will not be as difficult as it Lucky Number: 91 used to be for you the following weeks. Wednesday is the day to grasp for you Virgo (August 21 - as you may find someone/something September 20) interesting. You shall be rescued by Lucky Number: 2 your friends this week when things turn out a little nasty Taurus (April 21 - May 20) between you and someone. Look forward to next Thursday as Remember violence is not someone you know shall enjoy a new the answer, so brush up on experience which you can take advantage your witty remarks and give worry as an umbrella shall come to you of. Work shall take an interesting turn, and it to them! soon in the form of someone fit! Dressing a mad squirrel shall provide good luck for Lucky Number: 5 up is fine, but do it in your own time and the rest of the week! don’t expect others to be up for it as Lucky Number: 53 Libra (21 September - 20 October) much as you are! You’re gonna spend a weekend in on your Lucky number 86 Gemini (May 21 - June 20) own at home, eventually realising why you You might be spending more time hanging left to go to uni in the first place. Don’t Capricorn (21 December - 20 out with your mates than doing your despair, things aren’t as bad as they could January) university work. An old relative may give be. You will have to be more imaginative Your mental state is under threat this you a valuable skill. Take them up on it, and find a way out for yourself as you are week, due to a strict deadline. But as long and it will look good for you. Don’t take on your own now. Lucky Number: 64 as you ‘re dressed to kill and avoid getting a friendly competition too seriously as it envolved in others projects everything may ignite aggression and anger. Scorpio (21 October - 20 November) is doable. If you see that elusive pair of Lucky Number: 11 You poor thing. You’re gonna pull a really perfect boots splash out or you’ll only ugly munter at the Union sometime regret it. Cancer (June 21 - July 20) this week. This will, of course, be a Lucky Number 77 It is up to you to make things right result of extraneous amount of alcohol between your mates or your family consumption. You are better off getting Aquarius (January 21 - February 21) members. You’ve got the level of fairness some hang-over drinks from Tesco’s and It seems like that over the past few weeks, and unbiased opinion to let everyone win. preparing for the worst morning of your you’ve learnt to climb new ropes. Your You may feel a bit of pressure to start or life. view in many analogies could be changing, create something that you aren’t quite Lucky Number: 568 and that change seems good. But do not ready for. Take it easy. let your enemies influence your thoughts, Lucky Number: 32 Sagittarius (21 November - 21 just remain who you are. Keep it real on December) the weekends, especially Saturday. Things are raining down on you, but don’t Lucky Number: 41 barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 FEATURES 11

Editorial by Mary Yip Wates House So, finally, all the postgrads have started for the new year and the real fun starts! The Postgraduate and Staff Pub At the PGA camp things are cooking as with Rugby World Cup, Cricket and we fight for more rights and recognition Football showing on the big Sky (see PGRant), question is: will you join us in our efforts? On a lighter note, Sports Screen. we’re continuing our social events for Hot food served every day postgrads, including the first laser quest of the year! PGA Events

15th November

AGM elections for new PGA committee members Wates House

A Bit of a Cock-Up – Time to Raise Expectations? By Helen Cooper

So they got rid of VP Postgrads, and that was ok; we are still students after all. say it was a poor show compared to last year. Whilst I’ve heard the speeches The sabbatical team (the Sabbs) would all be involved in making the union more times than most, there’s something to be said for having the VC (and his relevant to us. Last year it sort of worked. It probably helped having a PG entourage), the Union President and the PGA president on stage showing us that on the Sabb team, but that’s neither here nor there. PG welcome 2006 was they exist and letting us know that they are there for PGs too. It’s a shame they awesome with a live band and a buzzing atmosphere, PG Ball got bigger and didn’t manage it this year. Judging by the photos I took of last year’s welcome better, with the union supporting the PGA. There was communication. Things everyone enjoyed the band and the free alcohol helped the dance floor get some were looking up… so what went wrong? serious use… I didn’t take any photos this year, but then I didn’t see any dancing The first thing I noticed was when I highlighted to the Union that Jorge Cham, to take photos of. Apparently there’s something in the pipeline to welcome the creator of the brilliant PHD Comic strip (www.phdcomics.com), was coming new PhD students: by the time you read this we should know whether it was a to Europe to tour with his ‘Power of Procrastination’ talk. I figured it would be success or not. simple to get the ball rolling. A quick e-mail, back in the middle of July while So why am I making a fuss? There’s a figure floating around that 45% of Surrey he was still organising dates, to assess the possibility, sort out costings and get students are PG, that’s almost double the national norm. Yet we continue to it set up ready for when the PG freshers came in at the beginning of October. be poorly represented in the union structure. I’m not placing all the blame Several prodding e-mails later and September was upon us, still the union were on the Union, or the current Sabb team. It is well known that getting PGs dragging their feet. They were citing that they didn’t know if they were going to involved on campus is difficult and it has been compounded by a lack of good be able to afford it… Didn’t know the new faculty system included a divination PG specific events during previous years. PhD students communicate more department… No-one had contacted Jorge Cham to see how much he charged. with the previous years’ students than their UG counterparts; they often share Needless to say when they finally got round to emailing him in mid September offices so bad vibes are passed on from one year to the next. his autumn tour had started and he was out in Australia… Last I heard they still So now the union has its work cut out to enthuse the PG community and provide hadn’t got anything back from him. I wouldn’t be surprised if we didn’t end events that combat the continuing negative perception. Will they rise to the up as the butt in his next tour cartoon “… Then there’s the University of Surrey challenge and improve relations with the students who are here for all but who think that emailing me a month before they want me to visit is a good way a few weeks of the year? Or ignore the needs of a large proportion of the of arranging guest speakers from across the pond!” Maybe we can organise Union membership and continue the alienation? Come on guys, you’ve got the a coach or two and gate-crash the Cambridge lecture he’s giving… 22nd of resources to hold events that make it worth our while coming out of our offices October for those that are interested. and from behind our computers… Post-grads: It’s your Union too. Support it. The second thing that made me realise that as PGs we were going to have Let the Sabbs know what you want. difficulty over the next year was that the Union organised PG Welcome this year without involving the PGA and chose the date as the week before the new PhD students start. This typifies the ignorance of the differences between the UG and PG student bodies. I went along to see what was arranged (and because I’m a To the Union and to post-grads: don’t let the view pervade that the union is ‘just student and turning up for free food and alcohol is ingrained in me). I have to for undergrads.’ [email protected] barefacts 14 Current Events 22 October 2007 Research or Religion – what do you put your faith in?

By Emma Rogulska You may have missed the mighty “God Particle Debate”, but you can still get the low down on the battle between faith and fact that people ﬁnd themselves facing.

Science is defined as knowledge that has been gathered based on observation, experimentation and induction. In contrast religion is based on faith; an implicit belief, reliance or trust. This is not a problem most of the time as religion and science usually answer different questions. However, as scientific knowledge and exploration continues to grow, there are increasingly topics on which both science and religion both have opinions if not answers. One such topic is that of the origins of existence itself. This is a particularly interesting instance, as the allegations of physicists that the universe’s laws seem fine-tuned to allow human existence overlap with theologians’ ideas about a caring creator.

The associated views can broadly be categorised into one the following two groups: Those who believe that our universe has been shaped by chance and those who believe it was created, its form chosen. In short is science a tool of God or is God an answer given to the currently unknown and inexplicable? It is debatable as to whether the existence of life can be explained by remarkably well-adjusted constants of nature, designed and intended or the result of an explainable but very complex physical system or unknown phenomena.

At present science has no conclusive answer as to the origins of the universe but the purpose of investigation is to ﬁnd the cause of a known result. Research is currently being undertaken to try and uncover the mysteries of the universe by discovering a theoretical sub-atomic particle – the Higgs Boson. Ultimately it is likely that science cannot answer the metaphysical question of whether or not the universe is designed because it can always be counter argued that existence was intended, regardless of its physical cause.

I suppose the most interesting question is whether or not science will become the new religion. People have always looked to faith to answer the unknown and explain the inexplicable. With ever growing scientiﬁc knowledge answering, eventually, will faith become redundant if further to existence we one day be are able to explain the dawning of human consciousness or will concepts such as free will and fate ensure that religion always has a place in society? barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 13

Not news

Because there are better things to think about

We know there’ll be plenty on your mind while you’re away at uni. So in between meeting essay deadlines and arranging the next party on facebook, don’t forget to stock your cupboards. With a wide range of fresh fruit and veg, great ready meals plus beers and wines for every budget, we’ve everything you need – meaning a quick shop with us leaves you free to concentrate on the more important stuff.

Pop into your local Co-operative store today! [email protected] barefacts 12 YOUR UNION 22 October 2007

mon. tue. wed. thu. fri. sat. sun. Disneyland o at Rubix Night Sports Students’ Personality CSSA

wk 8 Freestylers Student Assembly Fancy Dress dubslep &night grime music no wave c 22Survey starts 23 24 25in HRB 26in HRB 27 28in HRB Halloween Drum n Bass in HRB Arabic University Society t Carnival Fireworks wk 9 in HRB 7.30pm Sub Aqua Club . 29 30 31of the Bizarre 1 2 in HRB 3 4 in HRB

Showtime Inc. mystery n Army presents: night...

wk 10 cyclone 5night shoobz6 in HRB 7 8 & 9 in HRB 10 11 DISNEYLAND*PARIS *TRIP o Moulin Rouge Roy Pudsy Walker ps3 Pyjama Students’ Assembly at Chancellor’s Party v wk 11 12 13 14catch phrase 15 16 17 18in HRB

. FETISH no wave d wk 12 19 20 21 22 23in HRB 24 25 Knickers e Events Committee - 6pm in a twist night x’mas wk 13 Colours 26 27 28 29 30world aids day 1DINNER 2 in HRB

c Colours x’mas Headphone DINNER disco retro night Students’ shy fx & Assembly University Carol Service . wk 14 3 4 at Guildford5 Cathedral, 5.30pm 6 7 Stamina8 MC 9 cyclone x’mas in HRB 0 party C hristmas with... wok Carol Concert club 7 wk 15 10in Chancellor’s 11 12 13 14 15 16 www.ussu.co.uk barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 YOUR UNION 13 mon. tue. wed. thu. fri. sat. sun. Disneyland o at Rubix Night Sports Students’ Personality CSSA

Showtime Inc. mystery n Army presents: night... wk 10 cyclone 5night shoobz6 in HRB 7 8 & 9 in HRB 10 11 DISNEYLAND*PARIS *TRIP o Moulin Rouge Roy Pudsy Walker ps3 Pyjama Students’ Assembly at Chancellor’s Party v wk 11 12 13 14catch phrase 15 16 17 18in HRB

. FETISH no wave d wk 12 19 20 21 22 23in HRB 24 25 Knickers e Events Committee - 6pm in a twist night x’mas wk 13 Colours 26 27 28 29 30world aids day 1DINNER 2 in HRB c Colours x’mas Headphone DINNER disco retro night Students’ shy fx & Assembly University Carol Service . wk 14 3 4 at Guildford5 Cathedral, 5.30pm 6 7 Stamina8 MC 9 cyclone x’mas in HRB 0 party C hristmas with... wok Carol Concert club 7 wk 15 10in Chancellor’s 11 12 13 14 15 16 www.ussu.co.uk [email protected] PUZZLES barefacts 16 22 October 2007 .... Beat the PUZZLELORD A R E Y O U M A N E N O U G H ?

Colin Everett, our very own Puzzlelord has puzzles ranging from the easy to the devilishly complex. So if you need a break from lectures or work try these brain massagers out!

START HERE: CROSSWORD To start things off we’ll get you warmed up for our puzzle adventure with some easy puzzles: Try these mazes out for size – If you can’t complete the first one seriously reconsider whether you’re cut out for solving puzzles (or university in general). Clues Across: 7) Common; cliched; predictable. (5) 22) Curative; correctional. (8) 8) See 15ac. 25) The Diamond State. (8) 10) Manner of dress; clothing. (6) 26) See 9dn. 11) Rum and lime-based cocktail. (8) 27) See 15ac. 12) Dog railway coal-mine. (Cryptic) (8) 28) Form of take-away food that’s absolutely 13) 1, 3, 5, 7, 9, 11, 13, 15, ... . (4) delicious after a successful pub-crawl. (5) 15) and 8 and 27. Decisive finale to Channel 4’s first programme. (7, 9, 9) Clues Down: 17) A word which has a similar or identical 1) Sporting equipment upon which contestants meaning to another. (7) must ‘check out’ to win. (4, 5) 20) Cut into cubes; objects used to determine 2) Brand of luxury cars, the first of which was movement in ludo and backgammon. (4) built in 1902. (8) 3) Garfield’s least favourite days of the week. (7) 4) Metalloid, chemical symbol Sb. (8) 1 5) Blackadder’s first name. (6) 6) S*** weapon. (Cryptic) (5) 9) and 26ac. Owner of the café in ‘Allo ‘Allo. (4, 6) 14) Shaped like the tomb of an Egyptian pharoah. (9) 16) Assistance in Adele’s city down under. (Cryptic) (8) 18) Strange things. (8) 19) Rich king of Lydia, synonymous with great wealth. (7) 21) In mythology, the son of Daedalus who flew too near the sun. (6) 23) Filled trench, surrounding a castle. (4) 24) English county, sharing borders with 2 Dorset and Somerset. (5)

Answers: You Cheat

Icarus. 23) Moat. 24) Dorset. 24) Moat. 23) Icarus.

Adelaide. 18) Oddities. 19) Croesus. 21) 21) Croesus. 19) Oddities. 18) Adelaide.

9/26ac) Rene Artois. 14) Pyramidal. 16) 16) Pyramidal. 14) Artois. Rene 9/26ac)

4) Antimony. 5) Edmund. 6) Sword. Sword. 6) Edmund. 5) Antimony. 4)

1) Dart board. 2) Cadillac. 3) Mondays. Mondays. 3) Cadillac. 2) board. Dart 1) 1

Clues Down: Clues

28) Kebab. 28)

20) Dice. 22) Remedial. 25) Delaware. Delaware. 25) Remedial. 22) Dice. 20)

Countdown Conundrum. 17) Synonym. Synonym. 17) Conundrum. Countdown

Colliery. 13) Odds. 15/8/27) Crucial Crucial 15/8/27) Odds. 13) Colliery. 7) Banal. 10) Attire. 11) Daiquiri. 12) 12) Daiquiri. 11) Attire. 10) Banal. 7)

Clues Across: Clues 2 barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 17 Send your submissions to:

Arts Editor Jake South barea ts [email protected] Moving at an incredible rate, the world of music, film Idlewild and gaming can prove difficult to keep up with. Yet Scottish Fiction: Best of 1997-2007 here within the arts section it is our task to provide Parlophone/EMI you with the biggest news and releases of the last few weeks all wrapped up in a number of flavoursome It’s hard to understand how after a decade of paper pages. This here edition of Barearts includes supplying us with pure poetic rock anthems, unreal information on the new Radiohead record “In some people still ask ‘Idlewild, who are they?’. Rainbows”, the long awaited massive “Halo 3”, and The first track, classic anthem ‘You Held The of course the large handful of reviews to guide you World In Your Arms’, sets the pace and makes towards your next listening purchase. An interesting a statement to those who have chosen not to read for all, yet what if simply reading is not enough listen in the past. Following on with anthems also taken from ‘The Remote Part’ for you? There is a solution. If you would like your such as ‘American English’ and ‘A Modern Way of Letting Go’, Roddy Woomble opinion or any arts related thoughts to be printed within these sheets, then get expresses his ability to write poetry in a hard hitting rock tone. Earlier tracks involved with the Barearts team and simply send your name to bf.arts@gmail. include ‘I’m A Message’ and ‘When I Argue I See Shapes’. Muddled and nosey com. You will be welcomed with compact discs, gig tickets, odeon tickets, in ’98, Idlewild were yet to mature to the capability everyone, among them and cries of celebration. For now however enjoy a little read of what is written NME, knew they could. The new millennium brought with it tracks such as the here, keep it safe and we’ll speak again next time. crowd favourite ‘Little Discourage’ and ‘Roseability’ and the young Scottish indie rockers defied many critics who had already written them off. This ‘Best .jake south of’ appeals not just to those who have listened to Idlewild before, but to young/old rock lovers who appreciate brilliant rock tunes. What Idlewild create is real emotional rock for real music fans, that you can listen to no matter Pavarotti what mood you are in. Other tracks not mentioned to look out for include ‘No The Ultimate Collection Emotion’ and the incredible ‘Love Steals Us From Loneliness’. Scottish Fiction Decca shows 10 years of Idlewild’s maturity from enthusiastic indie teens to one of Scotland’s most powerful and underrated rock bands. Don’t miss out! In a post-mourning period of reflection, I did ask myself the question “How long until a Ben Pook shameless cash-in?” The answer was a fairly impressive four days, thus this record has probably had everything bar a few sleeve Halo 3 notes finalised for a long time now. Depending Xbox 360 on your viewpoint, this was either a bit of cold hearted profiteering or just Microsoft Game Studios good forward planning - the jury is out. The difficulty in this is from which stand-point to review it. Most opera fans probably have everything on here MASTER CHIEF IS BACK for the 3rd instalment in the and would file it in the category of ‘for completists only.’ Halo series. With over 1.7m copies pre-ordered However I have decided to focus on it from the angle of an operatic novice. in the US alone, it was certainly one of the most I believe the album was intended for such a purpose due to the sentence eagerly anticipated games of 2007. Within the first “Pavarotti’s best songs” used in the advert (he didn’t write them and many week, in excess of 5m copies were sold, making it are arias). This makes sense, as what helped make him such a star was how he the fastest selling game in history (beating its own bought opera back to the masses. predecessor, Halo 2). Statistics aside, the plot The collection allows his full vocal range to be displayed and a whole thesaurus follows on from a short comic, Halo: Uprising, couldn’t quite justify the first time you really hear him soar. His signature tune which bridges the gap between Halo 2 and 3. Yet again you play as Master Chief battling the Covenant and Flood across 9 Answers: You Cheat ‘Nessun Dorma’ can still stun when it reaches it grand finale even after multiple listening’s. This opens the album and is followed by other easily recognisable levels seeminglessly strung together in order to save humanity. tracks such as ‘La Donna é mobile’ and ‘Libiamo ne’ lieti calici.’ Throughout the However the lacklustre campaign, even though richly detailed, can be course of the album many choice cuts of the great opera’s are included, ‘Tosca’ completed in a short space of time. The Flood, a space zombie race intent on ‘La Traviata’ and ‘Aida’ to name a few, and it’s difficult to see how someone infecting the entire universe, prove to be more tedious than anything towards could not find enjoyment in this. the end of it. The sole purpose of Single-Player is to give you the basics for As an introduction to Opera I would say The Three Tenors 1990 concert Multi-Player, which is where the fun really begins. With hundreds of different may be better, but that does not take away the fact that this is certainly a fine game modes (Team Doubles, VIP and Juggernaut to name a few), customisable exhibition for one of the world’s true cultural heavyweights. Vincerò! content (Forge mode) and video playback (to record your ‘best bits’), you can’t knock it (apart from the screaming pre-pubescent American kids when Andy Vale they get shot). Thanks to the partying system that is becoming more and more prevalent on 360 games, you and a group of your mates can team up and take on the world together, further adding to the online sensation. Set aside a month of your life for Halo 3; prepare yourself.

Josh Blair [email protected] barefacts 18 Arts 22 October 2007 Radiohead myhound.com In Rainbows As I mentioned in the It was late summer ’05 when fans got news introduction to this arts that Radiohead had began rehearsing and section, keeping up to recording for LP7 (following some time off scratch with the hottest after the release of their 2003 album, Hail new actions of your to the Thief). Over two years down the favourite artists and line, two producers and no record label bands, actors/filmmakers and authors can prove challenging when we’re all later, they present to us the eagerly awaited such hard working and busy people… In fact I’ve heard rumours of many record, entitled In Rainbows. thinking of just giving up and throwing in the flannel altogether. NO. Stop, as I The album can only be bought as a digital download from the Radiohead have here an internet based tool to share that works like a thirsty hound to bring website, and is available for purchase at the buyer’s discretion – i.e. you brand spanking news that YOU want to know about. So much like a hound however much you want to pay (with exclusion of the disc box which had that the site is, in actual fact, named “myhound.com”. This is a new website a set price of £40 and includes hard copies of the album on CD-R and vinyl, that operates along the same lines as a search engine, finding information album artwork, and bonus material). This new distribution ethic, following specifically tailored to your interests and needs. However, myhound.com on from similar attempts by artists such as David Bowie and Prince, caused stands out above the other thumbs well as it works overtime to let you know an industry wide stir. Despite having sold 1.2 million pre-ordered copies about the newest releases, gigs and events as soon as they are available. By before the albums release date, though, it is believed that Radiohead are to simply registering on the site you can then add bands, artists, actors, authors, sign a label deal in the next month and the album will be available ‘to the video games; etc to your profile and myhound.com will keep you informed mass public’ in stores in January ’08. of any goings on regarding your choices via electronic mail. Neat. The musical accomplishment of the album, however, should not be A particular use of this fresh site is being able to keep on top of more overshadowed by its marketing hype. This beautifully arranged 10-song underground and unknown bands that can prove difficult at the best of times, collection demonstrates the bands overwhelming ability to sink their claws especially when massive artists claim the spotlight of the media. Not only into the listener. The opening two tracks, ’15 Steps’ and ‘Bodysnatchers’ are this but the hound boasts a “Recommender” feature. This provides personal instantly delightful – rigorously upbeat and moving - yet the album still works suggestions of other artists that may interest you based upon the information as a grower, where every new listen has different songs wrestling for the you have uploaded on to your profile. Handy. If there is one minor flaw to this limelight. site it could only be that it is currently based in New York, meaning that there A number of the tracks have been available for tasting (either in live could possibly be slight differences in release dates for us United Kingdom performances in the last two years, or in clips posted on their blogspace residents. Yet, at the same time this could prove an advantage as a release or ‘Dead Air Space’ by producer Nigel Godrich) prior to the albums release. tour in America would prepare us in advance for a possible release or tour Perhaps the most famous of these, ‘Arpeggi’, which Yorke and Greenwood upon these shores. performed it live at London’s Ether Festival in March 2005, demonstrates the Whatever the scenario this site is a plus, an opportunity to keep in the know sheer compositional perfection the band appear to touch on in every album about your favourite artistic interests for free. Don’t be fool, get yourself a and rivals earlier classics such as ‘Everything in it’s Right Place’ and ‘Paranoid hound! Android’. Despite not departing entirely from their affection of synthetic landscapes Jake South and ethereal electronic backdrops, this album seems to have an emphasis on the guitar, drums, and vocals - fore grounded in both the arrangement and production style. An album in which every song ends better than it begins; appearing naked Dannii Minogue vs. Jason Nevins at first, each song gradually motions forwards and outwards as they progress Touch Me Like That and envelope into far more dense and complex pieces. All Around The World Buy this album, or you’re an idiot. 2003’s “Neon Nights” was a pop revival of sorts for the Minogue underdog, Jamie Buchanan Dannii, that gave Kylie’s sister a string of top ten hits, such as “I Begin To Wonder”, that was sadly followed up with a lacklustre set of singles in the Jakobinarina wake of 2006’s retrospective “The Hits & Beyond”. Fast-forward another year ‘His Lyrics Are Disastrous’ and fans of Saturday night TV might better recognise Dannii as a judge from Regal/EMI this year’s X-Factor. Naturally, Miss Minogue would be stupid not to capitalise on this new-found exposure even in spite of her (usually) musically better From the remote and forgotten place we know only as ‘Iceland’ has emerged sister’s forthcoming comeback. With the mighty Jason Nevins on board, plus a young refreshing punk/rock band named Jakobinarina. ‘His Lyrics Are a sample of Sylvester’s 1978 dance anthem “You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real)” Disastrous’ carries with it and represents this is at perhaps Dannii’s most genuine sounding hit in a very long time. This Icelandic youths whose voices have up until release precedes her forthcoming digital-only album, “Club Disco”. now gone unnoticed. The whole 2 minutes and 20 seconds offers powerful and frantic 5/5 Josh Bates guitar riffs with a fiery attitude. Jakobinarina are exploding onto the indie scene, carrying Iceland on their back.

Ben Pook barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 Arts 19 Robyn Kylie Minogue Handle Me 2 Hearts Konichiwa Records Parlophone

“Handle Me” is the third single to be released Kylie Minogue’s first commercial release since from Swedish pop singer-songwriter Robyn’s her diagnosis with breast cancer in May self-titled album. Released at the end of 2005 is this electro-pop ballad written and October as the follow up to her 1st UK #1 produced by underground London-based single “With Every Heartbeat”, “Handle Me” is electro-dance four-piece Kish Mauve. Taken a feisty pop song that is brimming with attitude from her forthcoming tenth studio album “X”, and with a chorus that may just well be “2 Hearts” is undeniably Goldfrapp-lite sounding, which may disappoint heard for months to come. Already released back in 2005 in Robyn’s home fans of her pop princess dancefloor anthem sound they may have been country Sweden, the UK release of this elegant ballad comes fully equipped anticipating. Definitely not as instantaneous as her previous hits, this is a big with both new mixes and a new video. Whilst the “Bjorn Remix” transforms departure of sound for an artist like Kylie that may take time for fans to learn the song into a sublime rock song, the “Williams Vox” serves up a piece of to love. However, if this isn’t for you, the 39 year-old star has worked with house. The “Ortzroka Death To Disco Remix” evolves “Handle Me” into an some more familiar names on the new LP that will be released in November, electro power anthem. Most definitely worth a listen or ten. including the Scissor Sisters, Groove Armada, Calvin Harris and Stuart Price.

4/5 Josh Bates 2/5 Josh Bates

Nicole Scherzinger feat. will.i.am Baby Love Polydor/A&M

It was indeed only last issue we were offering a review Nicole Scherzinger’s debut single, “Whatever U Like” from her forthcoming album “Her Name Is Nicole”. However, one month on and things quite frankly are going tits up for the lead Pussycat Doll’s solo project. Following the flop of her previous first single on the US Hot 100 (it peaked at #105), it is no surprise that her record label have canned its release in most other territories, including the UK. “Baby Love” is thankfully not a cover of The Supremes’ classic by the same name, but instead a new song produced and featuring Black Eyed Peas frontman will.i.am. Originally intended for Britney, this song epitomises the saying “playing it safe” – although whether Nicole can muster up that much needed hit remains to seen.

3/5 Josh Bates

Chamillionaire feat. KC Industry Groupie Chamillitary Entertainment/Universal

“Industry Groupie” is the second single from southern rapper Chamillionaire’s second album, “Ultimate Victory”. This track should be instantly recognisable to the masses due to its heavy sampling of the 1986 classic hit “The Final Countdown” by Swedish glam metal band Europe. The beat is, of course, not without its own hip- hop twist produced by Jonathan “J.R.” Rotem (Destiny’s Child, Snoop Dogg, Britney Spears, Rihanna). Once again Cham describes the music industry through use of metaphor, this time referring to it as an unfaithful girlfriend who says “she’s down” but messes with every other big name hip-hop artist in the industry. Humorous in its delivery and references to other hip- hip songs of recent years, this could just be the breakout hit Chamillionaire needs to shed the one-hit wonder status acquired since 2006’s “Ridin’” hit #2.

3.5/5 Josh Bates [email protected] barefacts 20 Society 22 October 2007 editorial>Simon Moore Societies Editor

Welcome to the Societies Section. My name is Simon, and I’ll be your societies editor this year. I am currently a ﬁnal year Computing student, having just returned off placement and straight back into studies.

I stood for Societies Editor as I feel that with the vacant position the last year of barefacts news and information on societies has been lacking. Hopefully within this role I can start chasing down societies and getting more people interested in letting the rest of the student population know what their societies have to offer rather than waiting for potential new members to contact them. Please feel free to submit any articles to [email protected].

The First NoWave Night of the year! 25th September 2007-10-08

“Another night out late...” The night started with the weekly No Wave meeting in a packed Wates House event room. The regular society members were happy to see plenty of new faces in attendance! After a few drinks and an introduction to the society from the No Wave president Stuart Myers, the group descended upon the H.R.B. The ‘sardines in a tin’ analogy sounds too negative to appropriately describe the atmosphere in the bar; there was an upbeat vibe in the air and the hum of happy chatter as the music kicked in and more drinks were bought! The music through the night varied from punk, to metal, to dance, good ol’ rock ‘n’ roll, and plenty of styles in between!

Whilst it may have taken people a while to get warmed up, the dance ﬂoor was soon full many a drunken student bellowing their lungs out to favourites by the likes of System of a Down, Guns ‘n’ Roses and Muse, to name but a few! With such an open-minded crowd, even the lesser known bands like Sonata Arctica, Combichrist and Mindless Self Indulgence managed to keep plenty of people going! Even the attempt at clearing the dance ﬂoor with The Gotsicles failed TWICE, and the exhausted remainders had to be ushered out by the bouncers!

“Due to being happily drunk for most of the night, my memory has been somewhat hindered... Therefore it must have been good!” – Alex N

Many new society members showed a keen interest in DJ-ing on future No Wave nights; we can ensure a wide variety of alternative music throughout the year! Those interested in DJ-ing should attend the No Wave meetings held weekly on Tuesdays in Wates House at 7.30pm. -James Witham

Unicef Society

UNICEF, the United Nations Children’s Fund, is a global champion for childrens’ rights, which makes a lasting difference by working with communities and influencing governments. The UN convention on the Rights of the Child – which sets out the right of all children to University of Surrey Nursing Society reach their full potential – is the foundation of all their work. Unicef works in 158 countries and territories to fulfil children’s rights to health and nutrition; education; emergency relief; The University Nursing society was recently started to protection; water and sanitation. By working in partnership with others, from governments help keep all those within the department in contact, to and teachers to youth groups and mothers, UNICEF is a driving force for people throughout organise socials and nights out, as well as many other the world working to ensure a better future for children. events. The Unicef society of the University of Surrey represents and works with the global The society events are there to help cool your body organisation to raise awareness of the issues that Unicef support. We as a society will be down after a hard day’s work. Come and get involved and organising events and working with other student clubs in order to raise funds. Some possible bring any ideas for future events. fund raising events include: street collections, raffles, bake sales, sponsored sport events, fashion shows, and karaoke nights (which will be dependant on the support and volunteers If your interested in finding out more contact us: we have available). The possibilities are endless!! President: [email protected], Vice President: [email protected] If you would like to volunteer or get involved in any way, please email www.bfa cts.co.uk [email protected] barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 Society 21

BioSoc base pairing pub crawl over them. If you go join our facebook group *shameless plug* “Biosoc 2007- 08” and let us know what you want next we’ll do our best. Last Tuesday was the BioSoc pub crawl and all the exec would like to thank everyone who came and made it such a memorable night (ermm), even the engineers! It all started well with the meet and greet (free beer!) and then Chancellors where everyone was assigned a letter from the genetic code and had to ‘base pair’ between pubs to get to know new people. However the organisers may have already been having some problems with speaking coherently after our ﬁrst stop, Old Orleans, so this grand idea was forgotten pretty rapidly.

The rest of the evening went like a typical pub crawl, to Bar Med, ‘Spoons, Flares and Yates. Some people forgot to bring ID and so were refused entry to Flares, so missed a rather well performed rendition of the YMCA, before we all successfully met up again in Yates (I hope). We had the top ﬂoor of Yates all to ourselves which included two poles that ended up with me (the guy in the ‘cool’ lab coat), and many others having rather bad attempts on the pole, however we were put to shame when two (nameless) lecturers turned up and showed us how it should be done.

After Yates many went back to The Union (Bling), some Legion, others Time, others bed. Anyway, thanks for a good night everyone, it must have been good level 2 pharmacology was pretty empty (sorry prof!), and it was a useful Harry - BioSoc Treasurer indication of who washed, seeing who was still walking around with writing all

Mountain Walking activities (drinking) within view of striking mountain ranges. An introductory walk around a waterfall eased Italy Trip to the Dolomites, the less experienced members into the climbing allowing some to carry on and try for the harder routes whilst May 29th / June 6th others could take on ranging walks up and around the mountain trails. This year eight Mountain Walkers headed off to Italy for the annual summer trip. The One of the more impressive routes saw four walkers ) aim: to get to grips with the Dolomites and summiting Punta Fiames. The path to this climb initially the Via Ferrata routes. In essence this meant took walkers up a snaking scree slope, the steep incline climbing up the steep ascents of one of Italy’s rapidly revealing more of the valley to the walkers. The most beautiful regions with only a harness Via Ferrata (Strobel) itself was split into six sections and cables set into the rock face to keep us of cable, taking the walkers (now climbers) up the last safe, and our skill of course. 600 metres to the summit. Each section presented new challenges; climbing up tight gullies, traversing rock faces En route we took a cultural detour to Verona, with menacing downwards views and arms extending a city with food, opera and old winding streets, to their full reach to grab the next handhold. The view everything you expect and wish to see when at the top granted the climbers an inspiring sight of travelling in Italy. In the early sun, looking out the surrounding ranges with a calm wind adding to the from our tents the beautiful city greeted us, effect. The locals had even provided a guest book hidden the surrounding hills covered by classic poplar in a crag for all those who reached the peak to leave trees and vineyards with a meandering river their mark. highlighting the riverside old style buildings. Entertaining evenings always followed when all had The final train journey had us travelling returned, some more bruised then others, with card through mountain valleys, providing sights games, cooked foods and the local delights in the form along each part of the journey, carrying us of five litre bottles of wine, and the occasional shot of most of the way to our final destination of grappa. Cortina D’Ampezzo. Our campsite sat in a All in all, a good trip was had by all and will not be perfect location, within 45 minutes of the forgotten quickly. routes we had planned, providing ample opportunity for walking/climbing and other Simon - MWS Treasurer

Please send any articles, queries, and/or adverts for societies into us. [email protected]

www.bfa cts.co.uk As I said we are aiming to publish an article from as many different societies as possible. An article should aim to be from 2-400 words. Any general societies enquiries should be directed to Simon Moore (Societies Editor) [email protected] barefacts 22 Sport 22 October 2007 Feel The Heat Guildford Me and my fellow Sports Editor Tony wandered on down last Heat By Matt Cheetham year when we struck up this alliance. We expected a couple of Tickets are on sale Sports Editor hundred fans to turn out, and us to have to pretend to understand all the rules of Basketball to our host all afternoon. In the end we NOW from the It has come to our attention have to say we were staggered at the scale of the Students that many students at Surrey are whole event. oblivious as to what is literally on First of all a thousand people regularly turn Union Shop their doorsteps. The coverage up to watch ‘The Heat’. The team just qualified Price: £5 received in barefacts about this for Europe and on European nights (scheduled ‘local’ basketball team that keeps for Tuesday nights in November) there are plans Includes bus from winning might be mused over to have the games played over the ice-rink, in uni or town to occasionally, the pictures analysed front of 2,700 spectators!! Not only did the momentarily, but never considered unexpected quality atmosphere impress us, but the Spectrum. long enough to entertain the as did the level of play, the game is high class thought of actually going to and tightly fought, frequently do games have explore this team. Why should I 100 points scored by a team. Match days differ; Next home game: pay money to watch a basketball afternoon games involve more family oriented game? fun, with crowd participation during breaks Oh what you are missing… the in play, whilst evening games involve striking Sunday 21st Oct Guildford Heat are the current performances by Guildford Heat’s cheerleaders. Marshall Mk Lions most successful basketball team The whole match is underlined by commentary in England, their team boosts an to keep everyone in tune to what is happening Tip-Off 3pm impressive number of high quality and why, and music frequently blasts round the players from this country and court at relevant moments. abroad. In terms of cost, by the After the match you can go hit the town, have Friday26th Oct time you buy your sweets it’s a night out, or maybe begin your night at the bar London Capital more expensive to go to the cinema! In terms of accessibility, jump in Spectrum and have a drink with the players (and cheerleaders) on a bus that says spectrum on the front and you are there. Even if as we did. Surrey students receive cut-price tickets, go and get a Tip-Off 7pm you don’t understand basketball, I pretty much guarantee you your pair from the Union shop. Go and see England’s best Basketball night will be memorable. team while it’s so easy to do so, you cannot fail to be surprised Picture Courtesy Of Andy Bowler www.guildfordheat.com The legacy of Henman By Anthony Hanson final against the mercurial Goran Ivanisevic during the 2001 Wimbledon championship. It Sports Editor was fitting for him to finish his profession career at his second home of Wimbledon, where he gave Brits one last present to remember him by in the Davis Cup, contributing to Britain’s And so passes the greatest English tennis player of his generation (perhaps the only return to the elite world group with a victory over Croatia. Although Greg Rusedski did in significant Englishman of his generation if we discount the Canadian born Greg fact make it to a grand slam final, losing to Pat Rafter in the final of the US open in 1997, it Rusedski). Tim Henman announced his retirement at the age of 33 on 23 September is Henman that will command a place in our hearts. Wimbledon will be a poorer experience 2007 after a fourteen-year career. “Tiger Tim”, as he affectionately became known, without him and the rollercoaster of emotions he seems to create without fail each year. provided Brits with many a memorable occasion, much drama and, as much as I don’t The mantle now passes onto the next generation of tennis stars, which despite the like to admit it, much heartache. But when the emotions have cooled, and we come to efforts of the Lawn Tennis Association still looks depressingly bleak in both the Men’s look at his career with an objective and dispassionate eye, how will his legacy be judged? and Women’s game. In a few years time Brits may look back wistfully at the Henman The bare facts (no pun intended) of Henman’s career might invite a mixed reception. era as “the good times”. The onus looks to be squarely on the shoulders of the Murray He reached six Grand Slam semi-finals, including four at Wimbledon, tennis’ most prestigious brothers, most notably Andy in singles competition. For the sake of all Brits, let’s hope competition. Overall he managed 11 career ATP titles, and he reached a career high ranking he handles the responsibility with the same dignity and professionalism that Henman of number 4 in the world, in August 2002. He claimed the biggest title of his career with did throughout a truly commendable career. Farewell Henmania, you will be missed.. victory in the Paris Masters in 2003. He is indisputably Britain’s most successful open era player. However, there will be a nagging regret in the minds of many, and no doubt in his own, that he never managed to compete in a grand slam final, let alone win one. So through a dispassionate eye Henman’s career may leave you with a slight feeling of disappointment. He was a good player. A very good player in fact, but he was not a great. He never quite managed to reach his goals. In black and white terms, when he considers what he hoped to achieve in his career he will have to admit that he failed. However, significantly, he was not a failure. In fact, he may be considered an over-achiever. Henman was not obscenely gifted like a Roger Federer or a Sampras. He did not possess a major weapon such as a Roddick or even a Rusedski. And he was an exponent of the dying art of the serve- and-volley, a throwback and a breath of fresh air in the modern era of power play. Henman may not have found the treasure at the end of the rainbow, but he will always know that he never let anyone down. He is the quintessential British loser, and he is loved because of it; because of his guts, because of his pluckiness, because he tried. He can look back on his career with no regrets. He gave it his all. As a role-model, he showed potential stars of the future what could be achieved with dedication and hard work and in doing so he did his country proud. When reliving the great matches and great memories he has bequeathed us, and considering the burden of pressure he had to deal with largely on his own for so many years, I for one look proudly on Henman’s achievement’s and say “well done”. I have witnessed first-hand the passion and electricity he was able to generate on “Henman Hill” and recall fondly his many great matches, even the ones he lost, most notably his epic semi- barefacts www.ussu.co.uk/barefacts 22 October 2007 sport 23 Feel The Heat Football Talk By Matt Cheetam English, then personally I feel it was a momentous occasion Sports Editor for the Scots.

Welcome… Not only are things going well internationally for those Welcome back to barefacts interactive Football Talk north of the border, but domestically, on a European section. Over the past few weeks there has been the front Scottish football is also beginning to gain more and usual high amount of controversy in the world of football, more prominence. Rangers turned a few heads when particularly surrounding the highly unexpected exit made they managed to beat Stuttgart in their Champions by Jose Mourinho at Chelsea, and further confusion over League group, but when they went to Lyon, and recorded his successor Avram Grant’s credentials to hold down a mammoth 3-0 victory against a side who pretty much the top job at Stamford Bridge. Is he just a puppet for never lose at home in the Champions League, European Abramovich? It seems harsh the booing the Russian is football was rocked. Celtic too knocked over Champions receiving from fans, considering the money he has thrown League holders AC Milan 2-1, a huge result that has been at Chelsea over the past few years, but Jose was adored tainted and remembered slightly less due to the actions of by the Stamford Bridge faithful and they feel let down one disillusioned fan. In no way was that fan’s actions in and powerless. I have spoken to many Chelsea fans who any way acceptable, but the reaction he received from Dida cannot fathom a reason for anyone at boardroom level to was outrageous. The Brazilian keeper disgraced football do anything but wholeheartedly try and prevent Mourinho with his actions and personally I feel his two game ban was from departing. There is certainly a sense of confusion still well deserved. Standing at 6 foot - a lot of inches, the Milan over why he left. Arsenal have began putting together a buffoon felt so much pain from a tap on the shoulder given string of impressive performances both in the league and High Flyers… to him by the idiotic Scottish supporter that he needed in Europe, will they get their hands on some silverware this It would be unfair to write about the current world of to be stretchered off with an ice pack on his face. His season? Do they have enough depth in their squad to push football without covering Manchester City’s phenomenal antics were just as shockingly hilarious as Rivaldo’s at the for the title challenge, early stages of the season suggest start to the season. I mentioned in the first edition of 2002 World Cup, clearly they do not build them up tough yes. Manchester United too are finally playing good football barefacts how significant the signings of Petrov and Elano enough in Brazil, and maybe shows why such a sporting again, they seem to have put their early season sticky form could be, though I did not expect their influence to be as country does not take physical sports such as rugby so behind them, and appear on course to contest another great as this. Both players have barely put a foot wrong and seriously. What do you think of his actions, was his ban title defense. Internationally, England have continued their are hugely involved in the good work behind Manchester deserved? Are there further measures you feel should be renaissance in their bid to qualify for Euro 2008, things City’s meteoric surge to the top of the table. Between implemented to cut out blatant play-actors? look much better for Steve McLaren having now won five them the attacking midfielders have hit just under half qualifying games in a row 3-0 (This is submitted after the of City’s league goals, and have probably assisted a high percentage of the rest. As well has these creative players, Send your responses to these topics and any topics Estonia game, but before Russia). Yet the Lampard/Gerrard you want brought up in future columns coming in, debate still remains. City have become hugely solid at the back, Richards seems to have improved his already highly exciting game from as well as any sports related articles to Response… last season, Dunne is ever reliable at the back, and the Thank you for all your response, there has been a wide purchases of Corluka and Garrido also seem inspired by [email protected] range of opinions from students for this issue. Primarily Sven Goran Eriksson. Along with Petrov and Elano, those response focused on predictions for this current season. two, Richards, the exciting youthful talents of Johnson, and a Any general enquiries should be directed to either Matt Cheetham Many students appear convinced that Fernando Torres seemingly re-born Hamann, have started every City league or Anthony Hanson (Sports Editors). is the crucial ingredient that has been missing from game, and appear the focal points of Sven’s plans. Liverpool’s title assaults over recent years. More people have sent in emails backing Liverpool over any other Similarly, Portsmouth are also impressing many who wrote A Quick Hello.... contenders for the title this season. Torres is still young in, at time of press they stand fifth, having already faced all By Matt (and Tony) and can only improve, yet I wonder if a few too many goals of the top four teams from last season, coming off generally are expected of ‘El Nino’. He has looked hugely impressive unscathed. It seems like it will take a lot to derail Harry’s Welcome to a new-look barefacts, complete with a thus far, yet his overall record of 15 goals in 44 appearances men, who with veterans, and recalled England internationals generally new editorial team, though Tony and I will for Spain (at time of print), and 82 goals in 214 games for David James, and Sol Campbell in the heart of defense, and be Sports Editors again for another year. On our Athletico Madrid suggest his strike-rate is more a goal in a cluster of exciting players in more advanced positions, appointment last year barefacts rarely had a full page of every three games (the same ratio Rooney currently has Utaka, Kranjcar, Muntari, and early frontrunner in the race sport, we raised the focus and now have between 3-5 for England). He regularly gets subbed in his outings for for the Premiership’s Golden Boot; Benjani Mwaruwari, pages every issue. Our regular features: Football Talk, Spain and is not hugely experienced at top flight European who knows how far they can go, top five, maybe even top where students generally set the topics of debate by football, yet many are expecting big things and vast amounts four. How far can you see them going? Who else has emailing in, and coverage of the mighty Guildford Heat of goals this season for the Spaniard. Only time will tell. impressed you thus far? will remain the same, and then the rest is up to you, between three and six articles will feature in each edition In terms of bargain transfer buys, excluding those I picked Bravehearts… relating to Uni sport and the outside world of sport. Do out in the last edition, Roque Santa Cruz, formally of Bayern What a qualifying campaign Scotland have had. Being drawn bear in mind barefacts goes to the printers a good week Munich, at £3.5m is indeed a bargain. The Paraguayan also against three of the 2006 World Cup quarterfinalists, and before it is released, and especially in sport news changes boasts a creditable one in three goals ratio at international indeed the two teams that faced each other in the final, in a flash. Regretfully we do have to omit some articles level, and if not scoring, his intelligent link up play will hugely who could have predicted Scotland would be leading their when there simply is not enough space, preference will benefit Blackburn this season. For Newcastle, the capture group with only two fixtures left (again, at time of print). always go to those who attach a picture. of David Rozehnal, a snip at £2.9m, has been highlighted Jimmy McFadden has been in inspired form for his country, by a few of you. PSG’s player of the year played all the his epic finish against France has been commemorated in Expect competitions and new features to follow, if you games for the Czech Republic in World Cup 2006 and has the Scottish Football Museum. McFadden’s form has seen have any ideas or would like to write then email us at started every game since for his country. Hopefully for him starting now for Everton, though he seemingly saves [email protected], use this address for all articles followers of the ‘Toon Army’ he will finally solidify their his best for his country, having scored more goals for them, defense, and leave Shay Given with a little less to do. Finally, thirteen in thirty five, than he has in over one hundred Also, finally, 3–4 every Thursday, Tony and I have a Sports a well known Premiership player, Yossi Benayoun’s move to league games for the Toffees. Is his recognition at the show on GU2, check it out, get involved on MSN during Liverpool, for a fee around the £5m mark has impressed museum a sign of limited aspirations in Scottish football, a our show and get those sports debates rolling. some of you in terms of a bargain. The former West Ham winning goal in a qualifier, should Scotland expect more? fan favorite is a creative player who will surely add options Or was that goal really that big in Scottish football, when to Liverpool’s attack this season. you consider the money in their game compared to the [email protected] barefacts 24 sport 22 October 2007 Surrey Sink The Stone days, however, today Dave Mann decided to spice things up. our defenders but he soon decided to pipe down. By David Mann Whilst on the search for new balls and being sent the wrong way for the 15th time by the local sloshes, aka the 14 year Half time 2-0 Surrey. The team welcomed Luke Warren, Chris Mcdermott and Jay old mums of downtown Addlestone, Mann decided to turn Atherton into the side for their first team debuts against around. However, instead of making a simple u-turn like any The second half followed the same pattern. With the only an Addlestone side that challenged for the championship normal man, Dave went down a side alley. Now, let’s say the criticism at half time being movement from throw ons, it was last season. The day started off badly as White and Thomas minibus is 6.1 ft wide. This alley was 6.2 ft wide - and next ironic that the next and best goal came from a throw on. realised that they had forgotten footballs, bibs and cones door to a Chinese restaurant. The Chinese workers were Mann threw the ball down the line and it was played into when the boys were already in Addlestone. Negative times. watching in astonishment. Remember that scene in Austin the box. Lawal chested the ball down, swivelled and hit an Fortunately, however, this resulted in an amusing turn of Powers when he’s trying to turn that vehicle? Well, multiply unstoppable volley into the top corner. 3-0 Surrey. events. On the search for footballs there was the usual that by 10 and that was us. Anyway, after these exploits we Surrey tried out the new 4-3-3 formation and Gengasamy banter that the general public experience on Surrey away thought we’d better get to the ground and forget about the relished his new free role by adding another 2 goals. The balls. headlines and pictures of Thomas with Gilda and not Sim Surrey started well and were Nora has taken a weight off the lads mind. 5-0 Surrey. Surrey soon 1-0 up. A great interception were cruising and there was even showboating from Tony and through ball by Jones released Zinedine Jenkinson.. White down the left, who didn’t fail The game ended with Wren being taunted for being ‘queer’. to deliver onto the head of Lawal. Perhaps this is the backlash from the night before when Shortly after it was 2-0 as Jones rumours were circulating about Thomas and Lomas. 3 WAGS was released and slotted home down now. Quality. calmly. Surrey were comfortable and confident. Move of the season Full-Time 5-0 came when a cute passing move involving a Gengasamy nutmeg Great performance and great victory. Man of the match goes resulted in the ball dropping to to Raski as he added another 2 to his tally. 9 goals in 4 games Jones who tried an audacious now. volley from 20 yards which just went over. You don’t need footballs to win games. There were battles all over the pitch including the allstar albino Scorers: Raski Lawal 2 match up as Costello came up Shane Gengasamy 2 against one of his own in a Mark Craig Jones Wright vs David May blonde hair, red eyed encounter. It also kicked off between the Steve Claridge wannabe striker and every one of Surrey Falter In Numbers Game By Matt Cheetham South Bank line as much. The London side managed to steal a decent lead scoring four Sports Editor second half tries. The final ten minutes saw Surrey show real heart and passion as a final try was mustered by scrum half Paul. The final score was 31-19 to South Bank, a score Wednesday 10th of October saw the Surrey Rugby team launch into their league Surrey can certainly overcome when their hosts come to the Varsity, though Surrey were campaigns for the coming season. After an impressive pre-season, in which many new left wandering how they could dominate this side with fourteen men, but not with their freshers committed their minds, bodies and livers to the rugby team, two squads were full quota!! assembled. The 1st XV, led by new skipper ‘Tof’, set off for London South Bank, whilst the News from the Second XV was of a narrow loss, numerous freshers were introduced 2nd XV welcomed Roehampton to the Varsity. to Surrey Rugby and many will eventually progress to First XV level. There were a lot of With no assigned minibus driver the 1st XV set off in various vehicles for South Bank. notable performances by 2nd XV skipper Jack’s men, flanker Luke particularly impressed, Trouble soon ensued in getting there, as many vehicles found themselves lost in the maze and more is certain to come. After the physical battles of the day many freshers were that is London, although to be fair South Bank seems to be helpfully omitted from most then properly introduced to Surrey’s post match social rituals as another eventful maps. Scouring round London, separated from one-another, Surrey resorted to asking Wednesday passed for Surrey’s Rugby Club. multiple residents of glamorous suburbs, such as Brixton and Clapham, directions to this destination that seemingly didn’t exist. With kick off put back to 2.45 Surrey were arriving in fours and fives. Fifteen minutes before kick-off, another Surrey car arrived at this mysteriously non-existent destination, out of this car popped another five players to put the tally up to 14 players. With no chance of a warm up, these fourteen quickly sorted out positions, an absence of props led to fresher Kieran kindly offering his services to play front row, a position not normally accustomed to the half Brazilian, half Irish back row player. South Bank had a twenty-five man squad vigorously warming up hours before kick off and their team, squad, and many fans seemed a trifle amused at Surrey’s predicament. However, what was to come was surely one of the best halves of rugby Surrey has produced. Despite an early try being conceded, Surrey dominated proceedings. The forwards somehow held a scrum with a man down, and there were inspirational halves from many, particularly Keiran and Oli. The backs showed creativity, and an impressive kicking game, and twice skipper ‘Tof’ burst through to give Surrey a deserved lead at halftime. South Bank were reeling and were lucky not to be further down. As halftime approached the final car of players arrived. Surrey were re-enforced as the second half got underway, yet were instantly hit by resurgent South Bank, clearly embarrassed about their first half performance. The opening exchanges saw South Bank score early tries. They got a good maul going from a couple of line-outs and stream rolled their way over the Surrey line. Despite their epic first half display Surrey seemed lethargic, and never threatened the