$3 Where We Welcome Jay Cutler With Open Arms $3 The Committed Indian The REal Fan’s Program secondcityhockey.com April 3rd, 2009 [email protected] ?! PLAYOFFS?! Strange days indeed, no? By the end gratitude would be nice, rednecks). against Scum. broke a bone of tonight, the Bears will have a real QB, and Though he looks like a Canadian in his face -- which certainly can’t make him the Hawks may have qualified for the playoffs. muppet, we once again have to flabbergasted any uglier -- and is out for a while, too. Jason What planet is this? Did we get our drink at the job Barry Trotz continues to do in Ten- Arnott is still a week or so from coming back. spiked again? Obviously must have been an nessee. Bereft of any top-line stars, consis- Their forwards are J.P. Dumont -- who has accident, no one would roofie us on pur- tently losing talent to free agency (or the trop- only piled up 156 goals since being traded pose. Thanks to the Blues hilarious win over ical climes of Russia), and rarely restocking for Fucking Michael Fucking Grosek --, Steve Scum last night, the Hawks require one through that route, Trotz continues, year after Sullivan (more on him inside), and a bunch of tonight to do cinch up a spot. year, to have the Preds in the playoffs. Out of guys who look like you’d find them at a Brit- Though the Hawks have raised the the lockout, Nashville was one of the leading ney Spears concert (you can decide what that bar this season, we should take a moment to teams stocked with speed and skill, and could means, we just know it’s not good). quietly celebrate our return to the postseason. skate you right out of the rink. They can’t However, Nashville still boasts one It’s been seven years, and it wasn’t a very long really do that any more, but Trotz has molded of the top d-pairings around in stay then. We’ve waited a long time for this, a defensively solid team, with everyone com- and , who do enough scoring to and now that they’ve let us into the party, it mitted to the system. They also have a hellish make up for the lack of same coming from looks like it’ll be years before we’ve killed the kill, which the Hawks have struggled the frontline. Weber is second in goals for liquor supply, struck out with all the chicks, with all year. blueliners with 21, and was a leading Norris thrown up in the bathroom, and head out of Helping that defense is the blossom- contender until some nagging injuries led to it. It’s been a rocky four to six weeks around ing of goalie . The Preds have a few hiccups in February (or the fact that we here, but here’s a chance to step back and be been patient with the growth of Rinne, leaving said he was a Norris contender. That’s usually excited again. Playoff hockey at the United him in Milwaukee for three years (lesson to the kiss of death for anyone. We can stop a Center. Makes you smile, just a little, doesn’t be learned with Niemi/Crawford?). You’ll see 30-car funeral procession). it? he’s fourth in the league in GAA, and he’s fifth Take It To The Punk-Ass From His Name Is Sammy Pahlsson in SV% as well. Nashville has paraded goalies Nashville out of the Gaylord Center (or whatever the Oh, that’s why he was brought here. Like all Central teams, the Preds have fuck it’s called now) the past couple years. Wednesday night was the perfect demon- been kind of a headache. The Hawks are 1-2- Tomas Vokoun and Chris Mason have been stration on why the Pahlse was put in a red 1 against them, and it won’t be a walk in the shown the door, all with the thought in mind sweater. Sammy’s line completely bottled up park tonight. But without Arnott, Erat, Leg- that Rinne was eventually going to be the long the Blues top threats of Berglund, Oshie, and wand, the Preds are boasting one line. They’ll term answer. He’s here, and looks to be the Perron. Before you scoff that containing the still be extremely hard to break down, and it part. Blues top line is nothing to be frightened of, won’t be a -fest tonight. But will it take However, you wonder if the lat- consider that these three players had thrown any more than three goals, if the Hawks bring est injuries are going to be too much for the up 20 points combined in the five games the defensive game they had on Wednesday? Preds. The ever-annoying ice dancer Martin coming into Wednesday. And three of those We think not. -Orton’s Departed Neckbeard Erat fractured a bone in his leg on Sunday were against defensively-sound outfits Col- ubmus and . What’d they manage against the Hawks? Two shots. Deux. Dos. Coach Q is going to have to think long and hard about keeping at least Ladd with Pahlsson. Ladd has the size to deal with the Sedins or Marleau or Iginla, who you’re going to see come the playoffs. Bolland and Havlat have been wonderful in that role for most of the season, but it’s time for them to concentrate on being the #2 line. Laddy and Pahlse have just shut down perhaps the hot- test line in hockey, they’ve earned the right to take on other teams’ threats. You Cannot Be Serious?! The last time we saw the Predators in February, they were in the Derby. They were second bottom of the conference, and appeared to be a team that wouldn’t be able to score in a sorority with a fistful of ecstacy. Since that February night when they roared back in the 3rd with three goals, they’re 10-3-4, and sit tied for the last spot (partly thanks to our win Wed. so a little “What? It’s one item!!! Forklift’s Playoff Headlines

BLACKHAWKS FACE BIGGEST CHALLENGE federal government to receive “bailout” money, in order to keep their businesses The Blackhawks have faced a year full of challenges, with a afloat. new (), the firing of coach Denis Savard four games into the Along with banks and insurance companies, the major American auto season, injuries, and the trading of . manufacturers have received Federal monies. But now there is another group being That would normally be enough for any team. But now the Blackhawks, affected. the youngest team in the NHL, faces their biggest challenge to date. “This couldn’t have happened at a worse time,” one caddy said at the Growing playoff beards. gathering of the Chicago District Golf Association (CDGA)’s caddies. “We used to “I’ve been working on mine since my birthday always count on the Blackhawks ending the regular season, (November 19),” said forward . “Here, look… then hitting the courses.” wait, let me get in the light better so you can see it.” Another caddy agreed. “We always talk about the Some players have had difficulties in this particu- “Hawk 100 – 82 games, then 18 holes. But now they’re go- lar area, while others see it as a possible advantage. “I can ing to be in the playoffs, so where does that leave us?” actually grow a beard, Coach,” defenseman Brent Sopel was He continued. “There aren’t that many courses that heard saying. “Can I play now?” use us as it is, with carts everywhere. But a cart can’t tell Defenseman had other concerns. “I you how a green has been breaking, or when the last time the can grow a beard for the first round,” Keith said. “But what if fairways were watered. We always counted on the end of we get Vancouver? A beard just becomes one more thing for hockey season around here coming nice and early.” (Canucks’ forward Alexandre) Burrows to pull.” “The Hawks missing the playoffs paid for my daughter’s Some players are already prepared though. “Člen ballet lessons,” the first caddy said. “What was bad news for určitý brada is bezvadný. (The beard is perfect)” Martin hockey players and fans was always good news for us.” Havlat said. “I’m always ready for the playoffs.” Fork Lift “We loved looking in the standings and seeing the So far there has been no visible new beard growth Hawks 15 points behind the 8 seed,” he continued. “In fact, on the Blackhawks, but there have been reports of clubhouse a couple years ago we gave (Former Blackhawks’ President) personnel bringing in chia seeds to rub on the players’ faces in order to spur some Bob Pulford our ‘Man Of The Year’ award.” sort of growth. Some of the caddies were even discussing finding greener pastures. “The In a related story, Blackhawks’ president John McDonough is now plan- Hawks are good, and they’re young,” one caddy said. “We need to find a place ning ! Chia Head night. where there are plenty of courses and bad hockey. Sure, you can go to Atlanta, but that team’s hanging by a thread. Same goes for Phoenix. We’re all crossing our fingers for the Islanders to move to Kansas City.” CHICAGO AREA CADDIES ASK FOR GOVERNMENT “That could be like the Pulford years all over again.” BAILOUT In the wake of the current recession, many companies have gone to the Forklift is 1/2 of HOCKEENIGHT.com, and also runs the podcast you can find there, which can be a riotous experience. NHL STANDINGS *late game not included

Eastern Conference Western Conference

W L OTL PTS GF GA HOME AWAY W L OTL PTS GF GA HOME AWAY 1 Boston 50 17 10 110 259 181 27-6-6 23-11-4 1 San Jose 51 15 11 113 247 189 31-3-4 20-12-7 2 Washington 47 23 7 101 250 225 28-9-2 19-14-5 2 Outhouse 49 19 9 107 283 230 26-8-4 23-11-5 3 New Jersey 47 26 4 98 229 195 26-11-1 21-15-3 3 Calgary 44 27 6 94 244 233 25-10-4 19-17-2 4 Carolina 43 28 7 93 224 216 24-13-1 19-15-6 4 Vancouver 42 25 10 94 236 210 22-11-5 20-14-5 5 Philadelphia 41 25 10 92 244 220 22-12-4 19-13-6 5 HAWKS 41 24 11 93 246 207 22-9-7 19-15-4 6 Pittsburgh 42 27 8 92 245 226 24-13-3 18-14-5 6 Columbus 40 29 8 88 214 212 25-12-2 15-17-6 7 40 27 10 90 235 231 24-8-7 16-19-3 7 Anaheim 40 32 6 86 230 225 19-17-3 21-15-3 8 NY Rangers 40 29 9 89 201 212 24-11-4 16-18-5 8 St. Louis 38 31 9 85 220 226 22-13-5 16-18-4 9 Florida 38 28 11 87 218 218 20-11-7 18-17-4 9 Nashville 38 31 8 84 197 211 23-12-4 15-19-4 10 Buffalo 37 30 9 83 228 220 22-13-3 15-17-6 10 36 32 9 81 196 189 20-11-7 16-21-2 11 32 32 13 77 233 273 15-14-9 17-18-4 11 36 33 9 81 222 238 16-16-6 20-17-3 12 Ottawa 33 34 10 76 203 222 20-12-6 13-22-4 12 34 34 10 78 218 244 19-16-5 15-18-5 13 Atlanta 33 38 6 72 240 264 17-19-2 16-19-4 13 Phoenix 34 37 7 75 197 236 22-14-3 12-23-4 14 Tampa Bay 24 36 17 65 197 255 12-16-11 12-20-6 14 Los Ange- 31 35 11 73 194 224 16-15-8 15-20-3 15 NY Islanders 25 43 9 59 193 254 16-16-6 9-27-3 les 15 Colorado 31 44 2 64 193 250 18-20-0 13-24-2 teams that have clinched playoff berth in italics teams that have clinched division in bold italics

TOP 10 LIST PUCK DROP

Joel Ward-Micah Hoffpauir, Top 10 Things That Excite Us Most About Clinching A Nashville: Ward had 11 games in the NHL to his name Playoff Berth before signing with Nashville 10. We can continue blaming drinking problem on the Hawks this past summer at the age 9. A few more nights for Josh Mora to make us feel manly! of 27. He had played for four years in Junior, four years in 8. A few more nights of staring into the deep, blue, hypnotizing the Canadian University Sys- ocean that is Steve Konroyd’s eyes. tem at Prince Edward Island, 7. Congratulating Blues fans on their fine record against us this sea- and three full years in the AHL with Houston. Doesn’t son on the night of Game 1, while they sit on the couch exactly scream an NHL-er, 6. We weren’t ready to watch the Cubs dodgy bullpen quite yet does it? But Ward has finally estapblished himself in 5. We suck at golf The Show this season, popping up wth 17 goals on a team that needs every dented twine it can get. He’s 4. More Hawk Harrelson wearing that Hawks hat also been a demon on the penalty-kill, as he’s in the 3. Did we mention the drinking problem already? Top Ten forwards in Goals-Against per 60 minutes 2. Don’t really have to wade into the Jay Cutler debate on ice in Behind The Net Ratings. We don’t usually buy 27-year old rookies making their first splash in 1. We can keep stealing your money peddling this worthless rag... the big time, but here’s one that is working out. That shit, should we have said that? doesn’t mean we think Micah Hoffpauir will be belt- ing balls onto Sheffield Ave. this summer, however. 41-24-11

It’s inarguable that Keith is the bellweather for this team. When he’s good, the Hawks are. Against the Blues, Keith registerd a Corsi of +15, Hawks win. Against the Canucks? A mere 3. Against NJ? 20. This team needs Keith to be dominant. Lucky for them, he’s usually up to the task.

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# Pos Player Ht WT AGE GP G A P +/- PIM PP SH GW S S% Salary (Cap Hit) 24 R The Perfect Beard 6' 2" 217 27 75 26 43 69 23 28 5 0 5 230 11.3 $6,000,000 88 R Patrick Kane 5' 10" 187 20 74 24 41 65 -7 42 13 0 3 243 9.9 $3,725,000 19 C Captain Marvel 6' 2" 209 20 76 31 33 64 7 51 12 0 6 185 16.8 $2,800,000 32 L VerStud 5' 10" 180 22 73 21 29 50 13 55 6 4 2 127 16.5 $491,667 51 D 6' 0" 188 29 76 7 40 47 -2 22 4 0 1 103 6.8 $7,142,875 36 C Dave Bolland 6' 0" 188 22 75 17 28 45 18 48 1 2 4 104 16.3 $845,833 10 L The Sharp-Shooter 6' 1" 197 27 60 26 18 44 6 41 9 0 4 183 14.2 $3,900,000 16 L 6' 2" 198 23 76 13 30 43 21 26 0 0 1 182 7.1 $1,550,000 2 D Duncan Keith 6' 1" 194 25 72 8 34 42 31 58 2 1 1 164 4.9 $1,475,000 25 D Cam Barker 6' 3" 213 22 62 6 34 40 -7 63 5 0 1 92 6.5 $2,768,587 33 R 6' 3" 247 23 71 13 14 27 4 79 3 0 3 187 7 $3,000,000 22 R Troy Brouwer 6' 2" 213 23 65 10 16 26 7 50 4 1 0 123 8.1 $675,000 7 D 6' 3" 220 23 76 7 16 23 22 60 2 1 1 121 5.8 $3,500,000 46 C Colin Fraser 6' 1" 188 23 75 6 11 17 4 55 0 1 0 62 9.7 $500,000 26 C Samuel Pahlsson 6' 0" 204 31 60 6 11 17 -19 34 1 0 2 82 7.3 $301,000 55 L Ben Eager 6' 2" 220 24 69 10 4 14 2 154 0 0 0 71 14.1 $568,000 8 D Matt Walker 6' 3" 214 28 59 1 13 14 6 75 0 0 0 78 1.3 $600,000 37 R Adam Burish 6' 1" 189 26 60 6 3 9 4 89 0 0 2 76 7.9 $712,500 23 D Aaron Johnson 6' 1" 211 25 35 3 5 8 18 33 0 0 1 27 11.1 $600,000 Eager drew three penalties against the Blues, and was the defi penalties against the Eager drew three a pain in the ass. nition of 5 D Brent Sopel* 6' 1" 211 32 23 1 1 2 -4 8 0 0 1 15 6.7 $2,333,333 4 D Niklas Hjalmarsson 6' 2" 200 21 15 0 2 2 -1 0 0 0 0 11 0 $643,000 *injured Totals/Averages 6’ 1” 202.5 24.4 242 426 14.8/g 68 10 33.2/g 9.7% $44,607,000 Shame that they gave up a goal so late, because the PK looked as good as it has in weeks on Wed. Then again, if you score as many as they do when you’re short, you’ll take that. # Goalie HT WT AGE GPI Min GAA W L OT SO SA GA Sv% G A PIM Salary 39 Nikolai Khabibulin 6' 1" 209 36 37 2159 2.50 21 8 6 1 1063 90 .915 0 2 8 $6,750,000 38 6' 1" 205 33 40 2291 2.54 19 15 4 3 1064 97 .909 0 0 2 $5,625,000 Totals/Averages 6'1" 207 35 2.64 41 24 11 4 28.8/g 201 0.908 0 2 10 $12,375,000

TOTAL CAP NUMBER: $57,283,000 CAP SPACE: $274,000* *space also affected by buyouts and injured players Probable Lines Probable Pairings Left Wing Center Right Wing 2 Keith 7 Seabrook Injury List 24 Havlat 19 Toews 88 Kane 51 Campbell 4 Hjalmarsson Brent Sopel- Out (Talent) 32 Versteeg 10 Sharp 55 Eager 8 Walker 25 Barker Troy Brouwer- Questionable (Knee) Dave Bolland- Questionable (Foot) 16 Ladd 26 Pahlsson 33 Byfuglien 23 Johnson 37 Burish 46 Fraser

16 years ago, David Stern sent me to ruin the NHL. I have done every- thing I can think of to drive the core I am so close to completing the task fan away, strip hockey of all that’s Stern charged me with.... great about it, and eliminate any at- tention by the mainstream media... Nashville Pussy 38-31-8

Weber is heating up again, with 7 points in his last 8 games. # Pos Player Ht WT AGE GP G A P +/- PIM PP SH GW S S% Salary (Cap Hit) de Vries is the 2nd best PK d-man in the league, according to Behind The Net. 71 R J.P. Dumont 6' 1" 219 30 77 15 44 59 2 16 4 0 4 171 8.8 $4,000,000 10 R Martin Erat * 6' 0" 203 27 71 17 33 50 -7 48 3 0 3 149 11.4 $4,500,000 6 D Shea Weber 6' 4" 230 23 76 21 29 50 6 80 9 1 4 234 9 $4,500,000 19 C * 6' 5" 220 34 61 27 22 49 2 45 8 0 5 179 15.1 $4,500,000 20 D Ryan Suter 6' 1" 194 23 77 7 37 44 -11 73 3 0 3 132 5.3 $3,500,000 11 C David Legwand* 6' 2" 202 28 73 20 22 42 -3 32 1 3 1 175 11.4 $4,500,000 29 R Joel Ward 6' 1" 220 28 74 17 16 33 4 29 3 2 2 124 13.7 $500,000 26 R Steve Sullivan 5' 9" 173 34 36 10 17 27 4 30 3 0 2 73 13.7 $3,200,000 2 D 6' 1" 203 26 77 3 21 24 -5 63 1 1 1 120 2.5 $2,250,000 14 C Radek Bonk 6' 2" 210 33 61 8 15 23 -7 32 6 0 2 90 8.9 $1,475,000 38 C Vernon Fiddler 5' 11" 201 28 73 10 6 16 -8 22 0 2 2 104 9.6 $850,000 28 R Ryan Jones* 6' 1" 206 24 43 7 9 16 1 20 2 0 1 63 11.1 $746,000 22 R Asshat 5' 9" 200 25 67 4 11 15 -14 122 0 0 1 130 3.1 $975,000 25 C Jerred Smithson 6' 3" 204 29 77 4 8 12 -5 45 0 0 0 73 5.5 $475,000 8 D Kevin Klein 6' 1" 203 24 58 4 8 12 0 17 1 0 0 36 11.1 $650,000 5 D Greg Zanon 5' 11" 201 28 77 4 6 10 8 36 0 0 1 51 7.8 $725,000 4 D Ville Koistinen 5' 11" 187 26 33 3 7 10 -2 14 1 0 2 35 8.6 $700,000 12 C Scott Nichol 5' 9" 178 34 38 3 6 9 2 39 0 0 0 37 8.1 $750,000 42 L Antti Pihlstrom 5' 11" 190 24 53 2 5 7 -1 10 1 0 0 88 2.3 $427,000 27 R Patric Hornqvist 5' 11" 186 22 27 2 5 7 -2 14 0 0 0 54 3.7 $311,000 7 D Greg de Vries 6' 2" 205 36 66 1 4 5 -12 63 0 0 0 37 2.7 $2,500,000 48 C Cal O'Reilly 6' 0" 187 22 6 2 2 4 4 2 0 0 0 3 66.7 $66,000 3 R Wade Belak 6' 5" 223 32 53 0 2 2 -1 79 0 0 0 19 0 $479,000 53 C Michael Santorelli 6' 0" 189 23 7 0 0 0 -5 2 0 0 0 11 0 $565,000 41 R Jed Ortmeyer 6’ 0” 188 30 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 $222,000 * injured Totals/Averages 6' 1" 201.4 27.6 193 338 12.5/g 46 9 29.0/g 8.7% $43,152,000

# Goalie HT WT AGE GPI Min GAA W L OT SO SA GA Sv% G A PIM Salary 35 Pekka Rinne 6' 5" 206 26 47 2692 2.25 27 12 4 7 1293 101 .922 0 1 6 $575,000 39 Dan Ellis 6' 0" 188 28 35 1965 2.93 11 19 4 3 963 96 .900 0 0 2 $1,500,000 Totals/Averages 6' 3" 197 27 2.68 38 31 8 10 29.4/g 206 .909 0 1 8 $2,025,000 Time to bitch about this dumb motherfucker again. Since Staubitz dented his face but good, he hasn’t even drawn dented his face dumb motherfucker again. Since Staubitz Time to bitch about this the phrase from reminded of a break out offensively, we’re he could hearing all summer about how a penalty. After he was a rusher soon becaomes an usher. thought preview: A crusher who Line’s season Blue TOTAL CAP NUMBER: $45,458,000 Probable Lines Probable Pairings CAP SPACE: $11,242,000 *space also affected by buyouts and injured players Left Wing Center Right Wing 6 Weber 20 Suter Injury List 26 Sullivan 48 O’Reilly 29 Ward 2 Hamuis 5 Zanon David Legwand- Out (Face, boy howdy) 53 Santorelli 38 Fiddler 71 Dumont 7 de Vries 8 Klein Martin Erat- Out (Leg) Jason Arnott- Questionable (Concussion) 25 Smithson 14 Bonk 22 Tootoo Ryan Jones- Questionable (Upper body) Wade Belak- Questionable (Lower body) 41 Ortmeyer 12 Nichol 27 Hornqvist Antti Pihlstrom- Questionable (Upper Body)

...IS THIS THE YEAR? With the season coming to an end, we thought we’d rerun some of our favorite Page 6’s of the year. Here’s one we did in November. A Guide To Blackhawks Hockey on WGN The last time the Hawks were on WGN-TV, Aerosmith actually rocked. A lot has changed with both organizations since then, so we thought it might be helpful to introduce Hawks fans to WGN, and vice versa. A Guide To WGN For Hawks Fans A Guide to The Hawks For WGN Viewers First Wirtz kicks it, now I don’t WGN has seen the demographic of their view- have to sit next to Billy Gardner. 1. Everything’s coming up Foley!! ers change greatly the past 10 years. No longer is their programming aimed at those 140 and older, as that group 1. After being criminally shown of viewers had a nasty habit of dying. So instead of a the door by the old regime, broadcast- bunch of reruns of Andy Griffith and Get Smart, you’ll ing legend is back to do the see a bunch of sweet, jailbait ass in their underwear. The play-by-play. He also does a mean effect is two-fold, as it attracts new, younger viewers as Harry Caray impression, which his well as killing off even more old, male viewers, as mas- WGN bosses may make him do for turbation at that age is extrememly risky. an entire game. And he can drink your ass under the table. 2. For example, WGN is home to “America’s Next Top Model,” which will be heretofore known 2. No, Rachel, those cute boys who as “Jonathan Toews’s Next wear #19 and #88 will not go to prom Model.” Because what Johnny with you. They’re big-game hunters, Wants, Johnny WILL get. and you’re decidedly small-time. And

How many more do I have they’re not Jewish anyway. So shut up. Go Cubs! What quarter are to lose to get into the Hall we in? Can I get a Mai-Tai? of Fame? 3. Your eyes aren’t fooling 3. A game will be interrupted you, the WGN cameramen are at some point for a special report having a tough time following the when another piece falls off Ron puck. But give them a pass, WGN Santo, possibly his wig. cameramen have only been trained to find nice tits in the Wrigley bleachers.

4. isn’t yelling AT you, he’s just yelling. There’s no 4. Jackie Bange is still sur- need to feel bad about yourself. prisingly hot. No, YOU stop it right here, mother- fucker.

5. This has nothing to do with hockey, but if you’re over 17 and watching “Gossip Girl”, we have 5. The mother from “Arrested a fine line of raincoats we’d like to Development” is now the mother interest you in. No chafing! Seri- on “90210”, which, quite frankly, ously, what the fuck is wrong with is a sad idictment of Hollywood. you? “Eight-year olds, dude.” And of all of us, really. Pully’s Dream Date The Fight Card HAWKS vs. PREDATORS Fight Stats provided by Hockeyfights.com

GAME FIGHT TIME Bloody Black Bruised Just Analysis Nose Eye Ego Dancing 2-14-08 Barker vs. 1st. Barker, on his once-a-month pissed off Ortmeyer 8:03 session, (must really hate paying his cell √ phone bill) lands a couple rights early. 12-26-07 Wiz vs. Too- 3rd. On one leg, Wiz beats the ever-loving too 20:00 shit out of the biggest asshat in the √ √ league, and earns a place in every Hawk fans’ heart forever. 12-19-07 Burish vs. 3rd. Resident nutcase Burish and Nichol Nichol 13:51 √ don’t get up to much.

What To Watch For: Probably not much. These games mean too much for goofiness. Though we thought that about Sunday, and that turned into an “Anchorman” riot. There’s still Belak and Tootoo running around, so there’s a chance someone sends a postcard from the edge. They co-lead the Preds with 10 bouts apiece, though Tootoo might be gun-shy after having his face turned into tuna by San Jose’s Brad Staubitz. Power Play Penalty Kill Team Opp PPG PP% Team OPP PPG PP% Team TS PPGA PK% Team TS PPGA PK% DET 338 86 25.4 VAN 332 63 19.0 NYR 317 38 88.0 OTT 326 62 81.0 WSH 314 79 25.2 MTL 353 66 18.7 MIN 275 35 87.3 VAN 352 67 81.0 SJS 330 80 24.2 CGY 335 61 18.2 SJS 287 46 84.0 CHI 316 62 80.4 BOS 294 68 23.1 TBL 321 58 18.1 NSH 323 53 83.6 ANA 361 71 80.3 ANA 297 67 22.6 CAR 354 63 17.8 CGY 332 55 83.4 WSH 364 73 80.0 PHI 297 65 21.9 PIT 342 58 17.0 STL 349 58 83.4 NJD 309 62 79.9 BUF 335 72 21.5 EDM 336 57 17.0 PHI 376 64 83.0 CAR 288 59 79.5 STL 336 69 20.5 NYI 301 51 16.9 BOS 286 49 82.9 COL 303 63 79.2 ATL 330 66 20.0 FLA 289 48 16.6 BUF 313 54 82.8 TBL 380 81 78.7 TOR 310 61 19.7 COL 303 49 16.2 FLA 294 51 82.6 DAL 308 66 78.6 CHI 347 68 19.6 NSH 298 46 15.4 LAK 334 58 82.6 DET 308 69 77.6 OTT 321 62 19.3 DAL 341 52 15.2 CBJ 321 57 82.2 EDM 324 74 77.2 NJD 285 55 19.3 PHX 324 47 14.5 MTL 348 62 82.2 PHX 275 63 77.1 MIN 306 59 19.3 NYR 335 47 14.0 PIT 324 58 82.1 TOR 287 71 75.3 LAK 343 66 19.2 CBJ 312 40 12.8 NYI 338 63 81.4 ATL 341 85 75.1 Spotlight Steve Sullivan

A lot of women in Chicago were crying into the underwear they had planned to throw at Steve Sullivan when he was traded to Nashville in 2004. But we all should have been (well, not crying into our underwear, that would have given us The Plague. And crying into girls underwear would probably be frowned upon. Anyway...) Sully put up 118 goals in 370 games as a Hawk, or about 26 per season back in the Dead Puck Era when that was a much bigger accomplishment. However, like all talented scorers of Hawks past, when it came time to, y’know, pay him, Wirtz generally pointed them at the Exit Door, and so it was with Sullivan. He was shipped off to Nashville for picks that became not much, and has pretty much torched us since. But that’s not why Sully gets in tonight’s “Spotlight”. Most of you know that he has missed the better part of two seasons with back problems. Even this past summer, Sullivan was struggling to do normal things in life, much less play hockey. However, he rehabbed and worked, and finally returned to the ice against the Hawks in January. The Preds haven’t looked back since. Sully still has the baby- ass-soft hands we remember, and though he might not be the lightning-bolt-out-of-Zeus’s-ass speed-wise, he’s still far quicker than most of the league. He has helped the Preds power play, which is still not electrifying, but is better than the Kabuki theater piece it had been earlier in the season (a Kabuki reference? Really?). But most of all, Sully has provided an emotional lift to a team that looked for all the world like it was ready to play out the string in January. They were second-bottom at the time, and now are right in the thick of the playoff-chase. It’s easy to root for guys like Sullivan, even easier considering what he’s come back from. The Committed Indian is printed by Royal Omega Graphics- Elk Grove, IL 847-952-8000 [email protected] KNOW THY ENEMY

Once again, Dirk from On The Forecheck (ontheforecheck.com), a Rinne should indeed be “the man” here for several years, he’s Preds and leading hockey-sabermetrics site, was kind enough to answer our been groomed for this for a while now after three solid seasons at questions about the Preds. the AHL level. As always with hot rookie goaltenders, however, Ok, really, how have you guys done it? next year will be a real test for him. Four reasons, basically; first of all, Barry Trotz still has the ability to motivate his guys to play hard for him and stick to the Did Trotz finally get through to David Legwand? We know system, even after 11 years behind the Nashville bench. Second- he wasn’t exactly thrilled with his play earlier in the year... ly, they are incredibly picky about the people they bring into the Legwand is one of those guys that always leaves you wondering organization, in terms of personality and work ethic. I blasted what else he might be able to do. His skating is at such a high them for not making room for Miro Satan when he could have level that it makes him a great defensive center and PK man, but been claimed on , but the lads they’ve called up from it also puts him in offensive situations that his hands and goal- Milwaukee have generally fit right in. Third, the unsung hero scoring instincts just aren’t prepared for, and Trotz occasionally of this team is probably goaltending coach Mitch Korn. Despite kicks him in the butt to bear down more. He gives fans a lot of an ever-changing cast of characters, the Preds have been blessed frustrating moments, but I suspect a lesser skater would never with superior goaltending for several years now. And lastly, have gotten those opportunities to begin with. If we could just Joel Ward has been like a lucky lottery ticket for Nashville fans. give him Radulov-style hands, Legwand would be an All-Star. Nobody knew who he was in training camp, making the team as a 27 year-old with 12 games of NHL experience, but now he’s We’ve made no secret of our admiration for Shea Weber. not just got a at scoring 20 goals, but he’s one of the most ef- He went through a bit of a nasty stretch there in January fective PK forwards in the NHL (check out his GA/60 in 4-on-5, and February. But he seems to have come out of it, is that 3.22!). another reason for this turnaround? The unofficial word from people around the team was that lin- What Steve Sullivan has accomplished is pretty amazing, is gering injuries slowed Weber down for a couple of months, but he the difference? The Preds have to bring him back next he’s definitely kicked his game into a higher gear lately. I saw season, don’t they? somewhere that he and Ryan Suter are the 2nd-highest scoring Sully is absolutely a difference maker for this team, and without defensive pair in the NHL, and they seem to get more confident his comeback the Preds would be in the Tavares sweepstakes. controlling the game as the season progresses. I’m sure David Poile will make a strong push to resign him, but with the injury history and his age, what kind of contract makes Bottom line, will there be hockey in Nashville this season sense? 1 or 2 years, perhaps? You also have to worry about a after April 12th? big-money team with cap space (like Toronto) coming in with a I think they’ll scrape and claw their way in, taking it right down sweetheart deal. I’m sure from Sullivan’s perspective, this is an to the wire as they did last year. After all, as they’ve proven time unhoped-for opportunity for one more lucrative NHL contract. and time again over the years, this is what they do best.

The Preds have rotated a fair number of goalies out of town over the years due to finances and other reasons. Will Pekka Rinne be camping out there a while? Hawks-PREDS: the Last 4

Feb. 24th, 2009: Hawks 3, Preds 5 Jan 11th, 2009: Preds 1, Hawks 3 Hawks blow 3-1 3rd period lead in one of the The planets align to allow Buff to get off his big shot dumber efforts of the year. Buff, Havlat, and Kane on the PP to open the scoring, Bolland pots the win- had put the Hawks on cruise control, which they ner, and Khabby makes 26 saves for win. apparently never got out of.

Jan. 10th, 2009: Hawks 1, Preds 4 Oct. 13th, 2008: Preds 3, Hawks 2 (SO) Yuck. That’s the best way to describe it. Hawks Nashville ruins ridiculous red-carpet home opener. fail to show up, and count on 4th line to score. Havlat during 5-on-3 and The Sharp-Shooter score, Predictable outcome. but cancelled out by Weber and Klein strikes. Preds expose Huet’s 5-hole in skills competition. Hockey Sabermetrics CHICAGO Every game, we provide you with the Behind The Net numbers. These are at even strength, 5-on-5. Key: QUALCOMP- A measure of the quality of competition each player faces on the ice. Calcu- lated by averaging +/-/60 for opponents on the ice against player. QUALTEAM- A measure of the quality of teammates each player plays with. Calculated by averaging +/-/60 for teammates on ice with player. TOI/60- Time on ice, per 60 minutes, that player spends on ice at full-strength. GFON/60, GAON/60- Goals for and against team per 60 min. player is on ice +/-ON/60- Team’s Plus/ minus, per 60 minutes, while player is on ice. +/-OFF/60- Plus/minus of team while player is off ice, per 60 minutes. RATING- +/-ON/60 subtracted by +/-OFF/60. NAME QUALCOMP QUALTEAM TOI/60 GFON/60 GAON/60 +-ON/60 GFOFF/60 GAOFF/60 +-OFF/60 RATING Aaron Johnson -0.03 -0.21 11.8 3.63 1.45 2.18 2.26 2.11 0.16 2.02 Andrew Ladd 0.09 0.18 12.78 3.63 2.44 1.19 2.3 2.07 0.22 0.97 Duncan Keith 0.07 0.13 18.37 3.27 2.21 1.06 2.46 2.27 0.19 0.87 Adam Burish -0.08 -0.11 7.13 2.42 1.43 1 2.71 2.33 0.38 0.62 N. Hjalmarsson -0.01 -0.16 12.42 1.04 1.38 -0.35 2.57 3.52 -0.95 0.6 Martin Havlat 0.05 0.17 13.37 3.58 2.67 0.91 2.32 1.99 0.33 0.58 Dave Bolland 0.1 0.27 12.6 3.41 2.57 0.84 2.38 2.06 0.32 0.51 Troy Brouwer 0.02 -0.13 11.45 2.46 1.72 0.74 2.73 2.29 0.44 0.3 Brent Seabrook 0.08 0.26 16.44 2.77 2.09 0.68 2.62 2.23 0.39 0.29 Matt Walker -0.03 -0.14 13.9 2.68 2.08 0.6 2.52 2 0.52 0.07 Jonathan Toews 0.02 -0.09 13.21 2.79 2.3 0.48 2.63 2.13 0.5 -0.02 Colin Fraser -0.11 -0.14 7.78 2.29 1.77 0.52 2.79 2.23 0.56 -0.04 Dustin Byfuglien -0.02 -0.06 11.76 2.04 1.6 0.44 2.97 2.46 0.52 -0.08 Ben Eager -0.11 -0.13 8.28 2.34 1.92 0.43 2.73 2.15 0.57 -0.15 Kris Versteeg 0.02 -0.15 12.08 2.48 2.14 0.34 2.78 2.27 0.5 -0.16 Patrick Kane 0.02 -0.08 13.7 2.4 2.34 0.06 2.65 2.16 0.49 -0.43 0 -0.04 13.11 2.59 2.14 0.46 2.86 1.96 0.9 -0.44 Brian Campbell -0.03 -0.06 17.04 2.63 2.58 0.05 2.7 1.93 0.77 -0.72 Cam Barker -0.03 -0.09 13.24 2.01 2.53 -0.52 2.84 2.05 0.79 -1.31 Samuel Pahlsson 0.04 -0.78 12.28 1.63 2.69 -1.06 2.85 2.01 0.84 -1.89 Power Play Ratings Penalty Kill Ratings Corsi Rating Penalties Drawn This measures how many goals a team Shots attempted for a team vs. how many are at- This is a measure of a team’s goals-for gives up per 60 minutes the player is on tempted against while a given player is on the ice, per 60 minutes of player being on the vs. Taken the ice on the PK. per 60 min. ice on the power play. Player GFON/60 Player GA/60 NAME CORSI NAME PDRAW/60 PTAKE/60 Cam Barker 10.17 Troy Brouwer 4.48 Jonathan Toews 17.4 Adam Burish 1.7 1.4 Troy Brouwer 8.45 Aaron Johnson 5.71 Martin Havlat 16.1 Ben Eager 1.6 2.3 Patrick Kane 7.93 Adam Burish 5.91 Troy Brouwer 14.6 Colin Fraser 1.5 0.6 Patrick Sharp 7.93 Duncan Keith 6.33 Andrew Ladd 14.1 Patrick Kane 1.5 1 Jonathan Toews 7.44 Brent Seabrook 6.35 Brian Campbell 14.1 Kris Versteeg 1.4 0.6 Brian Campbell 6.99 Andrew Ladd 6.38 Patrick Kane 13.3 Dave Bolland 1.3 0.8 Dustin Byfuglien 5.97 Colin Fraser 6.85 Patrick Sharp 13 Jonathan Toews 1.3 0.8 Duncan Keith 5.85 Kris Versteeg 6.93 Duncan Keith 12.7 Patrick Sharp 1.3 0.8 Martin Havlat 5.77 Samuel Pahlsson 7.22 Brent Seabrook 12.3 Andrew Ladd 1.2 0.7 Brent Seabrook 5.29 Cam Barker 7.36 Kris Versteeg 12.1 Troy Brouwer 1.2 0.9 Kris Versteeg 5.08 Matt Walker 7.44 Dustin Byfuglien 11.4 Martin Havlat 1.1 0.5 Dave Bolland 8.7 Cam Barker 10.2 Dustin Byfuglien 1.1 1.2 N. Hjalmarsson 15.86 Dave Bolland 10 Aaron Johnson 0.9 1.7 Matt Walker 8.6 Matt Walker 0.4 0.6 Ben Eager 8.1 Brian Campbell 0.4 0.4 Face-offs Adam Burish 7.8 Samuel Pahlsson 0.4 1.1 Player Face-Offs Taken FO% Aaron Johnson 7 Brent Seabrook 0.3 0.8 Jonathan Toews 1196 54.9 Colin Fraser 3.3 Duncan Keith 0.1 0.9 Samuel Pahlsson 1160 53.5 N. Hjalmarsson 1 Cam Barker 0.1 0.6 Colin Fraser 737 47.6 Samuel Pahlsson -11.3 N. Hjalmarsson 0 0 Dave Bolland 1099 44.5 Total Rank: 24th 48.0 Hockey Sabermetrics NASHVILLE NAME QUALCOMP QUALTEAM TOI/60 GFON/60 GAON/60 +-ON/60 GFOFF/60 GAOFF/60 +-OFF/60 RATING Cal O'Reilly -0.01 0.18 12.04 4.98 0.83 4.15 3.16 2.63 0.53 3.63 Steve Sullivan 0.01 0.24 13.68 2.97 2.19 0.77 2.13 2.23 -0.1 0.88 Kevin Klein -0.16 -0.16 11.67 2.2 1.93 0.28 2.11 2.54 -0.43 0.7 Shea Weber 0.01 -0.05 16.91 2.69 2.45 0.24 1.97 2.42 -0.45 0.69 J.P. Dumont -0.02 0.06 13.44 3.04 2.74 0.3 1.9 2.3 -0.4 0.69 Jason Arnott -0.01 0.15 13.66 3.44 3.29 0.15 1.63 2.07 -0.44 0.59 Joel Ward 0 -0.03 12.04 2.35 2.21 0.14 2.21 2.51 -0.3 0.43 Ryan Jones -0.06 -0.07 10.16 1.69 1.27 0.42 2.87 2.87 0 0.42 Wade Belak -0.14 -0.09 5.23 1.51 1.73 -0.22 1.98 2.59 -0.61 0.39 Greg Zanon 0.02 -0.15 16.24 2.02 2.02 0 2.35 2.65 -0.3 0.3 David Legwand 0.04 -0.04 13.97 2.3 2.36 -0.06 2.22 2.51 -0.29 0.23 Martin Erat 0.04 0.08 13.55 2.57 2.89 -0.32 1.94 2.24 -0.3 -0.02 Scott Nichol -0.06 -0.22 7.97 1.63 1.83 -0.2 2.5 2.45 0.04 -0.25 Ryan Suter 0.01 0.18 17.13 2.38 2.8 -0.42 2.15 2.2 -0.06 -0.36 Jered Smithson -0.02 -0.17 10.71 1.94 2.46 -0.52 2.33 2.42 -0.09 -0.43 Antti Philstrom -0.07 -0.11 10.81 1.2 1.52 -0.33 2.37 2.24 0.13 -0.45 Radek Bonk -0.02 -0.17 11.92 1.45 2.22 -0.77 2.22 2.49 -0.27 -0.49 Patric Hornqvist -0.03 0.04 10.16 2.6 2.83 -0.24 2.46 2.18 0.27 -0.51 Dan Humuis 0.03 0.03 16.85 1.99 2.61 -0.62 2.38 2.32 0.06 -0.67 Greg de Vries -0.1 0.03 13.24 2.12 2.83 -0.71 2.37 2.22 0.14 -0.85 Vernon Fiddler -0.01 -0.05 10.45 1.78 2.75 -0.97 2.39 2.36 0.02 -0.99 Jordin Tootoo -0.05 -0.16 11.44 1.43 2.46 -1.03 2.56 2.48 0.08 -1.11

Corsi Rating Penalties Drawn This measures how many shots are attempted for a Power Play Ratings Penalty Kill Ratings team vs. how many are attempted against while a vs. Taken This is a measure of a team’s goals for This measures how many goals a given player is on the ice, per 60 min. per 60 minutes of player being on the team gives up per 60 minutes the ice on the power play. player is on the ice on the PK. NAME CORSI NAME PDRAW/60 PTAKE/60 Player GFON/60 Player GAON/60 Antti Philstrom 11.1 Ryan Jones 2.8 1.1 Steve Sullivan 6.42 Greg De Vries 1.91 M. Santorelli 10.6 Jordin Tootoo 2.2 1.8 J.P. Dumont 6.13 Ryan Suter 2.93 Shea Weber 6.4 Patric Hornqvist 1.9 0.9 Radek Bonk 6.02 Martin Erat 3.14 Martin Erat 5.5 Scott Nichol 1.6 2.2 Ryan Jones 5.46 Jerred Smithson 3.2 Ryan Suter 4.9 Joel Ward 1.2 0.6 M. Santorelli 5.19 Joel Ward 3.22 David Legwand 3.2 Vernon Fiddler 1.1 0.6 Martin Erat 5.07 Shea Weber 3.56 Kevin Klein 1.9 Martin Erat 1 1.2 Ryan Suter 5.07 Vernon Fiddler 5.78 Patric Hornqvist 1.4 Antti Philstrom 0.9 0.4 Jason Arnott 4.99 David Legwand 6.03 J.P. Dumont 0.9 Cal O'Reilly 0.8 0.8 Shea Weber 4.51 Greg Zanon 6.09 Jason Arnott -1 J.P. Dumont 0.8 0.3 David Legwand 3.45 Dan Hamuis 6.53 Joel Ward -2.1 David Legwand 0.8 0.7 Scott Nichol 8.16 Cal O'Reilly -2.5 Dan Humuis 0.7 0.7 Ryan Jones -3.9 Jason Arnott 0.6 0.8 Jordin Tootoo -4.7 Ryan Suter 0.5 1.3 Wade Belak -6.5 Jered Smithson 0.5 1 Steve Sullivan -7.4 Radek Bonk 0.5 1.2 Face-offs Player Face-Offs Taken FO% Vernon Fiddler -7.4 Steve Sullivan 0.4 1.2 Radek Bonk 678 60.9 Greg de Vries -7.6 Shea Weber 0.4 1.1 Vernon Fiddler 581 54.0 Dan Humuis -8.1 Greg Zanon 0.3 0.7 Scott Nichol 309 53.7 Radek Bonk -9 Greg de Vries 0.3 1.2 Jerred Smithson 685 52.4 Jered Smithson -9.3 Wade Belak 0.2 1.5 Total: Rank: 3rd 52.3 Greg Zanon -9.7 Kevin Klein 0.1 0.4 Referee Stats For The Hawks

Referees 1st NHL Hawks Games Hawks PP’s Hawks Pens/Game Hawks PP/Game Hawks PK/ W L OTL Game PK’s Game 2 Fraser, Kerry 1980 3 14 17 10.3 4.7 5.7 3 0 0 3 Leggo, Mike 1997 5 19 22 8.2 3.8 4.4 4 0 1 4 McCauley, Wes 2003 5 11 14 5.0 2.2 2.8 2 2 0 5 Rooney, Chris 2000 1 4 1 5.0 4.0 1.0 1 0 0 6 Marouelli, Dan 1984 3 14 11 8.3 4.7 3.7 1 2 0 7 McCreary, Bill 1984 5 25 19 8.8 5 3.8 3 3 0 8 Jackson, Dave 1990 6 28 24 8.7 4.7 4.0 4 1 1 10 Devorski, Paul 1989 4 15 25 10 3.7 6.2 1 3 0 11 Sutherland, Kelly 2000 2 11 14 12.5 5.5 7 0 2 0 12 Koharski, Don 1981 4 19 20 9.8 4.8 5.0 3 0 1 13 O’Halloran, Dan 1995 6 34 23 9.5 5.6 3.8 3 2 1 14 LaRue, Dennis 1991 6 28 24 8.6 4.3 4 4 1 1 15 Auger, Stephane 2000 5 25 17 8.4 5 3.4 4 0 1 16 Shick, Rob 1986 1 2 2 4.0 2.0 2.0 0 0 1 18 Kimmerly, Greg 1996 5 26 25 10.2 5.2 5.0 3 2 0 20 Peel, Tim 1999 4 19 19 9.5 4.7 4.7 2 2 0 21 VanMassenhoven, Don 1993 4 17 10 6.7 4.2 2.5 2 0 2 23 Watson, Brad 1996 4 15 8 5.7 3.7 2 2 1 1 25 Joannette, Marc 1999 3 19 7 8.6 6.3 2.3 2 0 1 26 Martell, Rob 1996 1 3 1 4.0 3.0 1.0 1 0 0 27 Furlatt, Eric 2001 6 27 26 8.8 4.5 4.3 2 3 1 28 Lee, Chris 2001 2 11 10 10.5 5.5 5 1 1 0 29 Walsh, Ian 2000 1 1 3 4.0 1.0 3.0 0 1 0 30 Hasenfratz, Mike 2000 4 25 22 11.7 6.2 5.5 0 2 2 32 Kowal, Tom 2000 4 13 10 5.8 3.3 2.5 4 0 0 33 Pollock, Kevin 2000 4 14 15 7.2 3.5 3.7 1 1 2 34 Meier, Brad 1999 4 14 20 8.5 3.5 5.0 3 1 0 35 Warren, Dean 1999 ------36 Morton, Dean 2000 3 24 13 12.3 8.0 4.3 1 1 1 38 St Laurent, Francois 2006 2 14 15 14.5 7.0 7.5 1 0 1 39 Dwyer, Gord 2003 5 30 24 10.8 6 4.8 3 0 2 40 Kozari, Steve 2006 5 30 23 10.6 6 4.6 2 2 1 42 O’Rourke, Dan 1999 3 17 15 10.6 5.6 5 2 0 1 43 Pochmara, Brian 2006 3 12 14 8.6 4 4.6 2 1 0 45 St. Pierre, Justin 2003 6 29 26 9.2 4.8 4.3 3 1 2

NHL LEADERS Goals Points GAA SV%

Player Team G Player Team P Player Team GAA Player Team SV% 1 A. Ovechkin WAS 54 1 PIT 108 1 BOS 2.11 1 Tim Thomas BOS .932 2 NJ 42 2 A. Ovechkin WAS 101 2 Steve Mason CBJ 2.22 2 T. Vokoun FLA .925 3 Jeff Carter PHI 41 3 S. Crosby PIT 99 3 Jonas Hiller ANA 2.24 3 Craig Anderson FLA .925 4 I. Kovalchuk ATL 41 4 DET 93 4 Pekka Rinne ANA 2.25 4 Jonas Hiller ANA .923 5 P. Marleau SJ 37 5 Zach Parise NJ 89 5 R. Luongo VAN 2.34 5 Pekka Rinne NSH .922 19 J. Toews CHI 31 32 Martin Havlat CHI 69 15 N. Khabibulin CHI 2.50 16 N. Khabibulin CHI .915 Block Party Looking Ahead, And Back It’s that time of year. College basketball’s season is mere days from it’s Burish serve? Can Dustin Byfuglien put the fork and bottle down long enough to apex, baseball parks around the country are about to host this year’s first pitch, football serve sixty minutes of consistent, determined effort? And will Coach Quenneville go fans are pontificating as if they were experts over collegiate stars they’ve most likely forth with this team’s high-tempo, attack brand of hockey or will he pull in the reigns never seen play and the is about to host another two months and handcuff his offense for the sake of ‘playoff hockey’? of arguably the most exciting and intense sporting events of the year, that of course no Ill-fated contracts to players like Byfuglien, Huet and Brent Sopel prohib- one will pay attention to - the Playoffs. ited GM from juicing his team at the trade deadline. A fault of his own, Wait a minute. Did I just say playoffs? We’re just 12 days now from the one that could cost him his job if this team gets embarrassed in the first round,Tallon start of the NHL’s ‘real’ season. And for the first time in seven years, the Chicago has no one to blame but himself in that regard. Blackhawks will participate. However, this team should be plenty capable of beating anyone in the Yes, the Blackhawks, a historic and symbolic patriarch of the 91-year Western Conference aside from San Jose or Detroit. Their fate will be decided on a hockey association have been absent from Sir Stanley’s spring struggle since 2002 mixture of three factors; will, coaching and leadership. and competed in just once in the last TWELVE YEARS. The same Blackhawks, until The Hawks best players must be their best players. Period. It’s not Dale 1997, who earned the NHL’s second-best longevity streak by qualifying for postseason Tallon’s fault if Patrick Sharp stands around waiting for the puck to hit his stick for in 28 consecutive seasons (1970-97), one less than the ’ all-time mark five or six games in the first round. Ditto if Campbell and Keith continue their turn- of 29 (1968-96). Of course Boston won two Stanley Cups during their over zombie ways. It’s time for Barker, Keith and Campbell to stop run. The Hawks made the Finals three times (71, 73 and 92), losing acting like Karpovstev, Spacek and Housley. Time for Khabibulin or to the Canadiens twice in hard-fought match ups and getting swept Huet to elevate their game above that of T-Bo. And if Patrick Kane by Pittsburgh in a series that was closer than the record book would doesn’t wake up and stop feeling sorry for himself sometime over the indicate. next week, he’ll be as much to blame as anyone. Recent events have exhibited this group of young Hawks These next six regular season games are the utmost of impor- may not only lack the experience necessary to put up a strong fight tance. For if the Blackhawks lose home ice in the opening round, no against the league’s best post-82, but March’s spring-swoon fol- matter the opponent, their tallons will be cooked. lowed by losses to Vancouver and Montreal this week solidified many Playoff hockey sure is a must-see, and a long-time coming in observers concerns suggesting the Blackhawks simply don’t have the this city. But be on the safe side and secure your place for home game tools needed endure a climactic postseason run. A or B, or it could be ‘wait till next year’ time on the West Side. In reality, this year’s team resembles the 2002 Blackhawks in many ways. Soft on the outside and suspect up the middle. A Chris Block I’ll leave you with some “last times”….. defensive-six who can be spectacular tonight and outright pathetic the next and a goaltender(s) with better than respectable numbers, yet you Last Blackhawks’ playoff series: 2002 Conference Quarter’s (vs. St. can’t ever seem to store your faith in. Louis 1-4) The Chicago teams of the early to mid nineties had the flair, swagger and Last Blackhawks’ series victory: 1996 Conference Quarter’s (vs. Calgary 4-0) balance needed to strike fear in opponents and brew believers amongst the masses. Blackhawks’ single-game playoff victory: Game 1, 4/18/2002 at St. Louis (2-1). This group of Hawks is headed is winding this season down exhibiting none of those A Blackhawk scored a playoff goal: Steve Sullivan, Game 5, Conference Quarter’s, characteristics. 4/25/2002 at St. Louis (3-5 Loss) The 1990-91 President’s Trophy winning Blackhawks were destined to Blackhawk scored a playoff goal at : Tony Amonte (SHG) 1997, meet either Boston or Pittsburgh for NHL supremacy seemingly from the start of the Game 6 of Conference Quarter’s vs. Colorado (3-6). That goal gave the Hawks a New Year, but a plague of boneheaded selfishness struck the Hawks’ locker room as 3-0 in the first period. Of course the Avs blasted Chicago and Jeff Hackett with six their first round series with the Minnesota North Stars began and Jon Casey bloomed unanswered and ousted the Hawks from the playoffs . into Jacques Plante just in time to send the Hawks and their inflated egos home after a Blackhawk goaltender to win a playoff game: Jocelyn Thibault (34 saves) brief six-game showing. 4/18/2002 in game 1 at St. Louis. Thibault got yanked after he bumbled a puck he was A year later head coach Mike Keenan waged a war with his squad and attempting to pass to Phil Housley in game 3 at United Center, as Scott Young took turned over 11 positions, bringing in veteran workhorses Steve Smith and Brent Sutter the puck away from T-Bo and wrapped it around into any empty net. Steve Passmore as well as young defenders Igor Kravchuk and Bryan Marchment, and ‘do-a-little-of- would play the final seven periods of the series, allowing six goals. everything’ winger Stephane Matteau in meticulously, but brilliantly, building a team Blackhawk goaltender records playoff shutout: Ed Belfour, 4/19/1996, Conference poised to steamroll through postseason. But we all know how that ended. Keenan Quarter’s vs. Calgary. Belfour owns the last three Hawks’ playoff shutouts. also rode a 21-year old Jeremy Roenick to his first 50-goal season and Chris Chelios Blackhawk to score a hat-trick in the postseason: , “Rock Your House” elevated expectations of every one of his successors to date in his own imitable do-it- 04/24/1994 vs. Toronto. Jeremy Roenick’s goal (the last Hawks’ goal scored all, and at the highest-level, brand of defensive hockey. at ) would give Chicago the victory and tie that series 2-2. Tony 1995’s Blackhawks were arguably the best of all the 90’s Hawk teams, Amonte, in his second month as a Blackhawk, scored 4x on the Leafs the night before. but a knee-on-knee collision with Derian Hatcher on Sunday April 2nd at the UC cut The year prior, Brian Noonan scored all three Hawks’ goals in Game 1 of the ’93 Jeremy Roenick’s regular season short and when he returned three months early from opening round series at Chicago Stadium against the Blues. Noonan had a knack for a torn ACL for game two of round two against the Canucks, he was a fraction of the killing the Blues. player we’d known. Ultimately however the stacked Red Wings were much too much Blackhawks’ postseason overtime game: 4/20/1997, United Center vs. Colorado for the Hawks to withstand in the Conference Finals and it signaled the beginning of – Sergei Krivokrasov beats at 11:03 of second overtime to score Hawks’ the end of a fun, yet brief Chelios-Belfour-Roenick era on West Madison. first win of that series. Chicago would win and send the Avs home two nights later Since then Chicago has seen one star, newly-beloved or accepted face after with a series tied 2-2 only to get blown away 7-0 in game five and 6-3 back at the UC another leave on uncompromising terms. And with each exit, from Roenick to Belfour for game six. to Chelios to Amonte and even Nicholls or Sullivan, the Blackhawks have drifted far- ther and farther from relevancy, let alone a chance to sip from Lord Stanley’s chalice. But now by the grace of this franchise’s decade-long futility or simply hap- Chris runs the incomparable The Third Man In (thethirdmanin.com), the most info- penstance (honestly it’s probably a good mixture of both), the Blackhawks are back in filled Hawks blog, and Puck Chatter (puckchatter.blogspot.com) his league-wide blog. the mix. Exactly what “mix” they’re in or how they’ll fair three weeks from now is You can find him at [email protected] honestly anyone’s guess. Questions are rich and abundant. Will either Cristobal Huet or Nikolai Khabibulin have the ability, or the stones, to stand up and rip the starter’s job from the other in time for it to matter? Is soon-to-be 21 year old Jonathan Toews ready to carry a team on his back in his first professional postseason? Does Patrick Kane still play for the Blackhawks? When the puck drops, will Patrick Sharp be interested? Is everyone’s defensive darling D-Keith in a slump or are his skills appraising in a galley of reality as game’s tighten and the spotlight intensifies? What purpose does Adam The Making of The Chicago Blackhawks

info in part provided by hockeyreference.com YEAR DRAFT TRADE FREE AGENT 2008-2009 Samuel Pahlsson (COL 7th round 1996) and Brian Campbell (BUF 6th Logan Stephenson (PHX 2nd round 2004) from round 1997 ANA for James Wisniewski (CHI 5th round Cristobal Huet (LA 7th round 2002) and Petri Kontiola (CHI 7th round 2004) 2001) Matt Walker (STL 3rd round 1998) Aaron Johnson (CLB 3rd round 2001) 2007-2008 Patrick Kane (1st round) Ben Eager (PHO 1st round 2002) from PHI for Brent Sopel (VAN 6th round Jim Vandermeer (FA PHI 2000) 1995) Craig Adams (HAR 9th round 1996) from CAR for future considerations. Andrew Ladd (CAR 1st round 2004) from CAR for Tuomo Ruutu (CHI 1st round 2001) 2006-2007 Jonathan Toews (1st round) Martin Havlat (OTT 1st round 1999) from OTT and Bryan Smolinski (BOS 1st round 1990) for Tom Preissing (FA SJ 2003), Josh Hennessy (SJ 2nd round 2003) and Michael Barinka (CHI 2nd round 2003) Kris Versteeg (BOS 5th round 2004) from BOS for Brandon Bochenski (OTT 7th round 2001) 2005-2006 Niklas Hjalmarsson (4th round) Patrick Sharp (PHI 3rd round 2001) from PHI Nikolai Khabibulin (WIN 9th for Matt Ellison (CHI 4th round 2002) and CHI round 1992) 3rd round pick 2006 2004-2005 Cam Barker (1st round) Dave Bolland (2nd round) Troy Brouwer (7th round) 2003-2004 Brent Seabrook (1st round) Colin Fraser (PHI 3rd round 2003), Jim Van- Dustin Byfuglien (8th round) dermeer (PHI FA 2000) and 2004 2nd round pick from PHI for Alex Zhamnov and 2004 4th round pick (WIN 4th round 1990) 2002-2003 Duncan Keith (2nd round) Adam Burish (9th round)

COACHES GM HISTORY Head Coach-Joel Quenneville Dale Tallon (2005-Present) Assistant Coach-John Torchetti Bob Pulford (Too Fucking Long) Assistant Coach-Mike Haviland Mike Smith (2001-2004) Assistant Coach- Bob Murray (1999-2000) Goaltending Coach-Stephane Waite The Making of The

info in part provided by hockeyreference.com YEAR DRAFT TRADE FREE AGENT 2008-2009 Ryan Jones (MIN 4th round 2004) from MIN Joel Ward (MIN Undrafted FA and 2009 2nd round pick for Marek Zidlicky 2006) 2007-2008 Wade Belak (QUE 1st round 1994) from TOR Radek Bonk (OTT 1st round 1994) 2008 5th round pick Antii Pihlstrom (Undrafted FA) Greg de Vries (EDM Undrafted FA 1994) Dan Ellis (DAL 2nd round 2000) 2006-2007 Jason Arnott (EDM 1st round 1993) J.P. Dumont (NYI 1st round 1996) Ville Koistinen (Undrafted FA) 2005-2006 Cal O’Reilly (5th round) Scott Nichol (BUF 11th round 1993) Patric Hornqvist (7th round) 2004-2005 Michael Santorelli (6th Jerred Smithson (Undrafted FA) round) Greg Zanon (OTT 5th round 2000) Pekka Rinne (8th round) 2003-2004 Ryan Suter (1st round) Steve Sullivan (NJ 9th round 1994) from CHI Shea Weber (2nd round) for 2004 and 2005 2nd round picks Kevin Klein (2nd round) 2002-2003 Vernon Fiddler (Undrafted FA) 2001-2002 Dan Hamhuis (1st round) Asshole (4th round) 1999-2000 Martin Erat (1st round) 1998-1999 David Legwand (1st round)

COACHES Head Coach: Barry Trotz GM HISTORY Asst. Coach: Brent Peterson 1999-Present: David Poile Asst. Coach: Peter Horacek Goaltending Coach: Mitch Korn The Hawks Record When...

Playing at home...... 22-9-7 Allowing a short-handed goal...... 2-4-1 Getting obliterated on face-offs...... 16-11-4 Playing on road...... 19-15-4 Taking 30 or more shots...... 32-16-8 Are even close on face-offs..... 25-13-7 Scoring first...... 29-5-4 Taking less than 30 shots..... 9-8-3 Eddie O tells crew to “stop it right here!”.... 35-18-11 Opponent scores first...... 12-19-7 Allowing 30 shots or more...... 17-9-6 Eddie O tells us D have the forwards and forwards have the D Shoot the puck bimbo scores...... 5-2-1 Allowing 30 shots or less...... 24-15-5 during 4-on-4...... 35-17-11 Shoot the puck bimbo doesn’t score...... 17-6-6 100 Level doesn’t cheer for anthem. 22-8-7 Pat Foley screws up a name...... 39-19-11 Shoot the puck bimbo blows editors of Commited Indian..... 0-0-0 1st of a back-to-back...... 4-6-3 Ice Crew wear skirts...... 7-1-3 Shoot the puck bimbo is a former Fifth Feather Flame .... 1-0-0 2nd of a back-to-back..... 8-5-1 Ice Crew wear pants...... 3-1-0 Playing on a Monday...... 2-2-1 Opponent played night before.... 8-5-2 Ice Crew wear shorts.... 12-7-4 Playing on a Tuesday...... 6-4-0 Taking more than 5 penalties..... 16-16-5 Member of Ice Crew hilariously falls on her shapely ass.... 0-1-0 Playing on a Wednesday...... 10-1-3 Taking 5 or less penalties.... 25-8-6 Leading after 2 periods...... 32-2-3 Playing on a Thursday...... 2-3-0 Seabrook gets a flat-footed penalty.... 8-5-6 Losing after 2 periods...... 2-17-4 Playing on a Friday...... 5-4-4 Burish takes a penalty...... 8-6-2 Tied after 2 periods...... 7-5-4 Playing on a Saturday...... 7-5-3 Keith takes a penalty...... 13-5-2 In overtime...... 5-5 Playing on a Sunday...... 9-5-0 Sharp takes a penalty...... 10-3-2 In shootout...... 4-6 Savard changes lines during game... 1-2-1 Toews takes a penalty..... 10-5-3 Cam Barker plays...... 33-20-8 Coach Q keeps lines as they are..... 40-22-10 Havlat takes a penalty.... 7-3-1 Cam Barker is in Rockford due to GM incompetence..... 6-2-3 Are out-muscled by opponent.... 10-18-4 Sopel takes a penalty...... 3-2-1 Lacking a #2 center...... 37-22-9 Outshoot opponent...... 30-14-6 Sopel looks 6 steps slow...... 7-5-5 In 1-goal games..... 11-7-11 Are outshot by opponent.... 11-10-5 51 Phantom blows a coverage...... 27-20-9 In 2-goal games...... 13-7-0 Havlat shies from contact...... 16-6-6 Toews is trying too hard...... 3-8-3 In 3-goal games...... 8-6-0 Patrick Kane scores...... 11-7-3 At least 1 fight in 300 Level... 4-3-4 In 4+ goal games...... 8-3-0 Jonathan Toews scores...... 14-3-6 No fights in 300 Level..... 18-5-3 Scoring 3+ goals..... 38-7-7 Martin Havlat scores...... 16-4-1 Playing Eastern Conference..... 9-7-3 Scoring less than 3 goals...... 3-16-4 Patrick Sharp scores...... 16-4-2 Playing Western Conference..... 32-18-8 PA plays Ministry...... 0-0-0 Dustin Byfuglien scores...... 7-2-1 Playing Central Division...... 5-7-6 PA plays Modern Cock-Rock..... 22-9-7 Dustin Byfuglien wins a foot-race??!!!!!..... 2-1-0 Playing Northwest Division.... 12-6-1 PA plays Stranglehold...... 7-3-4 Andrew Ladd scores...... 11-0-1 Playing Pacific Division 15-5-1 PA plays P.J. Harvey...... 0-0-0 Dave Bolland scores...... 11-1-4 Playing Atlantic Division 2-3-2 Fraser fights...... 7-3-1 Adam Burish scores...... 3-2-1, and totally ruins that joke Playing NASCAR Division 4-1-0 Burish fights...... 5-2-0 51 Phantom scores...... 3-2-1 Playing Northeast Division 3-2-1 Seabrook fights..... 1-0-0 Duncan Keith scores...... 5-3-0 Playing in October.... 4-3-3 Barker fights...... 0-0-2 Brent Seabrook scores...... 5-1-1 Playing in November.... 6-3-3 Buff fights...... 1-1-2 VerStud scores.... 12-7-1 Playing in December...... 10-1-1 Sharp fights...... 1-0-0 Troy Brouwer scores.... 8-0-0 Playing in January..... 7-6-1 Eager fights...... 10-4-1 Scoring a Power Play goal...... 29-10-9 Playing in February..... 7-4-1 On Comcast...... 31-13-8 Not scoring a Power Play goal... 12-13-2 Playing in March...... 6-7-2 On WGN...... 10-7-3 Allowing a Power Play goal...... 18-18-10 Playing in April...... 1-0-0 On Vs...... 0-3-0 Not Allowing a Power Play goal...... 23-6-1 UC plays really stupid goal song..... 22-5-7 On NBC.... 0-1-0 Scoring a short-handed goal...... 6-2-0 Huet’s five-hole open like Lindsay Lohan’s..... 3-11-4 Judd Sirott hates Adam Creighton 41-24-11

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