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25TH ANNIVERSARY Silver Jubilee Issue OCTOBER 1992 I I Ill II
Hash House Harriers SOUVENIR MAGAZINE Episkopi, Cyprus
From the land .of legends...
The Episkopi Hash now twenty-five years old! ------�
KEO is an exceptional Pilsner type lager beer, long matured and bottled fresh and unpasteurised, to retain its natural flavour, aroma and freshness. At the Brewing Industry World Bottled Lager Competition, in 1987, Keo was awarded theDold medal for excellence. 25TH ANNIVERSARY Silver Jubilee Issue OCTOBER 1992
ON!O I• 25
Hash House Harriers SOUVENIR MAGAZINE Episkopi, Cyprus
EDSPEAK As to our content; we have done our
When I "volunteered" to take over as best to temper the dignity of a Silver Hash Words in February of this year, Jubilee Celebration with the light little did I realise that editing the Silver hearted air that must necessarily go Jubilee magazine went with the job!! with the "sport" of hashing. For the It explains why I was selected from a purest, we have fine articles on the cast of one! origins of hashing; for everybody else Our original concept was a good qual (apart from him) we have cartoons, ity glossy magazine with 48 pages, jokes, badinage and more importantly half of which we hoped to fill with at least one photograph of every cur 1-P. advertising to offset our production rent Hasher in Epi costs. You should have heard the We hope therefore that this magazine editor in liaising with the long suffer will Jonahs and Doubting Thomases - become a "fundamental" part of ing Vassilis, our publisher at 'Ten on impossible, they cried! You will fall flat every Hashers library, (well where Eleven". Vassilis is fantastic- not only on your faces etc. etc.!! else would you expect to put it) and has he turned our amateurish junk What they reckoned without, was our that you will buy an extra copy espe into something resembling a profes secret weapon ! Little did they know cially for your wives for whom I have sional magazine, but he has put up - that in our very midst we had a born the following important message!! with Stewart for at least one full day a again "Fagin", otherwise known as Girls!, we love you, as long as you week for the past two months!! Stewart 'Tin Legs" Glanfield, who don't come on the Hash, and we need Thanks must also go to all our adver scoured the bazaars, far and wide, you to get the god awful screw-grass tisers, great and small, without whom drumming up advertising revenue for out of our socks on Wednesday wash this magazine would not have been this never to be repeated venture. day morning!! possible and to those Hashers, both Within a week we had achieved our And so, to credits! Well/ have already semi and completely illiterate (and target and suddenly there were howls mentioned Stewart Glanfield- but if I PSA) who have had the gall to put of protest from other contributors not don't mention him again, this copy will forward contributions for inclusion in wanting to be left out. So, like 'Topsy", never get printed! Stewart has been a the magazine. our magazine "grew and grew" to the tower of strength (spelt p -- n in the Time now to let you get on with the bumper edition you now see before a-- e) in wringing money out of our show!! and enjoy our 25th Anniversay you! advertisers and also acting as my sub Celebrations - On. On! A. G. r Contents HASH HOUSE
. . . . The Indispensable Man ...... 5 Epi Dictionary ...... 35 HARRIERS The Inaugural Run ...... 5 On, On with Otto ...... 36 ...... Episkopi Hashers Last Run ...... 6 Great Sporting Moments .... 37
...... S.C.B's ...... 7 Processionary JOINT MASTERS Current Membership of H3 .....8 Hasherpillars ...... 38 PSA On On Game ...... 14 Gentlemen, that
...... Mad Jogs and Englishmen .17 reminds me ...... 39, 64
. . Travellers Tales ...... 21 The Epi Epic ...... 45 'On Pres Dave Smith The CPT ...... 31 Secret Society ...... 46 . .. Hash Words Peter Visagie Wail of the Hash Orphan .... 31 Hashing Weather ...... 49
. . The Sermon of Jordan Trip ...... 52 Hash Cash Gerry Wright
. . .. . Inauguration ...... 32 Hash Motoring ...... 59
1-P SILVER JUBILEE 1 MESSAGE FROM 'ON PRES
hen I agreed to take over as 'On Pres of the elite W body of gentlemen known as Episkopi Hash House Harriers, little did I realise that my name would go down in the annals of history as the 'On Pres of the Silver Jubilee Hash. My predecessor, Herr Flick, who fea tures prominently elsewhere in this magazine, was a master of repartee, a characteristic befitting a man who regards the law courts as a stage on which to play Shakespearian com edy. His predecessor, Dusty Miller, Brif:adier EGB Davies-Scour.fie/d gave some of the most original and CBt: MC DL, DepLIIy Commander witty post-Hash Grits ever heard (by Britis h Forces Cyprus District and Jack Blocki) so that I, a mere medico, first ·on Pres of Episkopi flas h had a lot to live up to. /louse Harriers. (P hoto courtesy of It gives me great pleasure to welcome the "Lion" 1967) everyone to the Silver Jubilee Cel ebrations, and, to the many guests who are joir.ing us from overseas (Ex Epi Hashers from UK and Germany, and members of other Hashes in the Dear Col Smith 19 Aug 92 Middle East), I should like to extend a particularly warm welcome to our Is I was delighted to receive your 1etter of 12 Aug & to land of Sun. I hope everyone has a hear that the Hash flourishes. 25 years! Oh dear, how time weekend of fun, laughter, exercise and Keo. flashes by!
Episkopi H3 was founded on 13 No Marvellous that you are celebrating the Silver Jubilee vember 1967 but, in keeping with in so splendid and appropriate a fashion, and I wish you other elite personages, we are cel every possible success and a most enjoyable time which I ebrating our "official" birthday - on 27 am sure it will be. October, to coincide with the school Half Term Holiday. It's terribly kind of you to have thought of me and I The great Father figure of Epi H3 is would dearly love to come & take part - the invitation is Brigadier Gris Davies-Scourfield, the much appreciated, but alas I shall not be able to make it. original 'On Pres who, having first of Diana & I are just off on a 3 week holiday in France & all practised the setting up of a Hash Switzerland, & one holiday a year is about my limit. Also I at Dhekelia in February 1967, per have a number of commitments at that time which I cannot fected the feat by establishing a bet ter Hash at Episkopi a few months reallyjettison. later. In the immortal, but adapted, I words of Robert Burns: don't "hash" nowadays, but my dog takes me for regular long walks, & my wife and I play quite a lot of "His prentice han' he try'd on Dhekelia, regular tennis, so I remain fit. And then he made Episkopi". With every good wish Gris Davies-Scourfield, who was Deputy Commander British Forces Your sincerely Cyprus District in 1967, is alive and well at the ripe old age of 75 and living Gris Davies-Scourfield in Hampshire. Unfortunately, he could not accept our invitation to join us this weekend but he sent the opposite message: Hashing is obviously good for you!
2 If S/LVER JUBILEE The t:pi /lash ream who roo/.. parr in the Lionheart Charity Nun 1991. /s that 'On Pres· ll'ife in thefron(!
Epi H3 has stuck to the original princi Over the past 2 years Epi H3 has raised that sum this year. ples of Hashing, as founded in Kuala considerable sums of money for Hashing in the bondu around Episkopi Lumpur in 1937, of providing some charity. The Battle of Britain Hash has given me enormous pleasure over light exercise and social intercourse Thrash in September 1990 raised over many years (I'm one of the lucky over a glass of beer for Officers and C£700 for local charities, and the Hash Army officers to get a second tour in equivalent status civilians of the Brit team which took part in the Lion heart Cyprus). I have seen some magnifi ish Forces. Unlike many more "mod Charity Run from Kolossi Castle to cent scenery, been persuaded to take ern" Hashes which have sprung up all Limassol Castle in September 1991 part in the Cyprus Walkabout twice, over the world, Epi H3 maintains its raised over C£250 for the Muscular met some fascinating people, and elitism and sexism by allowing ladies Dystrophy Trust of Cyprus. As we go goats (see Hash Words of May 1988) to run only on rare special occasions to print a similar team hopes to better and enjoyed the company of a wide - Boxing Day, Valentine's Day and cross section of the residents of the Birthday runs. Consequently, and in WSBA. "Jointry" lives on on (!) in Epi keeping with tradition, all the runs H3· even it it is struggling elsewhere in over the Silver Jubilee Weekend will Cyprus. I have also learned the pleas be open to all and sundry including ures of the new "gold top" in my life, ladies. the golden brew unique to Cyprus Hashing is regarded by many non and this Island of Sun, (I did, actually, hashers as some sort of secret drink find some in a select winery in Salis ing club, not dissimilar to the Free bury at £1.75, yes £1.75, a can!) masons. However, unlike the Masons, This magazine and the weekend fes Epi H3 is certainly not secret, is open tivities have not appeared as if by to all Officers and equivalent status magic. My thanks go to our makeshift Civilians working and living in the Committee of Joint-Masters, Gerry Western Sovereign Base Area of Cy Wright (Cash) and Peter Visagie prus and comprises a mixture of (Words) who has edited this maga genuine marathon runners, like Brian zine in spite of fearsome competition Lord, with more mature retired offic from StewartGlanfield without whose ers who enjoy a gentle jog and a drink tireless efforts in obtaining so much and a chat afterwards. Unlike many sponsorship and in badgering our other sports and games, Hashing can printer we should not have had such be enjoyed by gentlemen of all abili an excellent magazine, and printed in ties. 'On Pres Dm•e Smith time.
H'S/L VER JUBILEE 3 My thanks also go to Lindsay Irvine, Peter Robinson and Pat Craft for or ganising the evening functions, Chris Upton for the tickets, Peter Saunders for the transport, and the dynamic academic duo of Frank Dolan and Richard Stenton who have organised the Registration evening and Paramali Hash with Mick Donovan.
The weekend trail has been set; there's lots of trash; take advantage of the checks (you'll need to recover for the next day's Keo); and if we do go outside the angle try not to get too upset - all good Hashes have at least one cock-up! Have a most enjoyable weekend.
On! On! DAVE SMITH
II Octoher 1990: 'On Pres Dusty Miller and Words Lindsay fn•ine prese111 a cheque for C£712 raised for/he Battle of Britain Appeal/990.
4 1-P S/LVER JUBILEE THE HARE� AND HOUND� OF THE EXCLU�IVE HARRIER� INDISPENSABLE INAUGURAL THREE MILE CHASE PROVIDES A MAN GREAT DEAL OF FUN FOR MEMBERS ODE TO 'ON PRES
tlze Some time when you're feeling Those Officers who took part in inaugural run of Episkopi Hash House important, Harriers Some time when your ego is flush, Residents of Episkopi who had not hap mined effort not to be caught napping. Some time when you take it for pened to hear of the activities of the granted, exclusive Hash House Harriers must Leading the field throughout the three You're the best qualified on the have wondered what was going on on mile chase were Joint Masters Nick Hash. Monday afternoon when a couple of Pakenham-Mahon. and David Clarke dozen officers, in various sports attire, who were closely pursued by Gee Ellis, eagerly followed a trail of paper across Pat Lee and Brigadier Gris Davis Some time when you feel that your the "bondu" around the Garrison. Scourfield, the President of the Branch. going The area of the Episkopi Airstrip ech Indeed this was the order at the finish. Would leave an unfillable hole, oed to the cries of "On On" as the A much more tired group downed wel Just follow these simple instruc leaders picked up the "scent" and come pints at the NEAF Officers Mess 45 tions "Checking" as they equally quickly lost minutes later, but the decision was it again, for "hares" Andrew Scobbie unanimous that the inaugural run had And see how they humble your and Alex Gadman with Shandy in tow been a great deal of fun. soul. ... had laid a cunning trail in their deter- It was Brig Davis-Scourfield's idea to instigate the Episkopi Branch of the Take a bucket and fill it with water, HHH Cyprus after the successful intro Put your hands in it, up to your duction of "hashing" to Cyprus earlier wrists. this year at Dhekelia. He said afterwards that he had been a Pull them out - and the hole that little disappointed at the turn out, but remains added that those who had come along Is the measure of how you'll be were the keen participants who would missed. almost certainly be there for each chase. For those who are not already aware, You may splash all you please the HHH is a club already established in several places in the Far East. It is when you enter, aimed at providing Military Officers and You may stir up the water galore, their equivalents with the opportunity of But stop: and you'll find in a minute taking a little gentle exercise each week That it looks just the same as and partaking of suitable refreshment before. afterwards.
The moral of this is quite simple, You must do the best that you can; Be proud of yourself, but remem "Hares" ber, Alex Cadman and Andrew !!! Scobbie lay a cunning paper trail for There's NO indispensable man Reproduced from an article in Lion which the inaugural H3 run at t:'piskopi appeared on 17th November, 1967.
1-P SILVER JUBILEE 5 DIGITAL TECHNOLOGY THE HASHER'S LAST RUN 5700 Palmcorder A Cautionary Tale (with apologies to John Masefield) Versatile Digital Functions
The pure Cyprus air came clear to his lungs Digital Image Stabilizer 16X Digital Zoom And the shout of 'On On' from fifty odd tongues. The sound of their cry was a joy to his ear, And he thought once again as to why he was here. In three miles or more he 'd be there at the finish, And a case load of Keo he 'd help to diminish. In three miles or more he would reach for his dream, So he cried out 'On On', and he put on some steam.
Like a ripple of wind running swifton the grass,
Like a whippet in heat, with a dog at her arse. Like a rocket he went - like a bolt from the blue; In his TRX Trainers, he practically flew. His lean, hungry body grew bloody and torn, As he hurled it with gusto through bramble and thorn. Through Old Paramali, and then up the track. He was way on his own, at the front of the Pack.
'On On' he cried with a galloping rally, Down through the Snake, and along Second Valley. And then, without warning, amidst all the yelling, Digital Still He suddenly realised the pace now was telling. The herd thundered by, and his joy in the race, Was savagely withered, for where was his pace? Two minutes ago he was heading the pack, Now the bastards had left him, alone, at the back.
0 He felt sick as a parrot, his stomach was sagging, t9: 0 !ii His legs felt like lead, his feet now were dragging. .n· ::E � -o He stumbled and tripped and he dropped to his knees, en Cll g CT He clutched at his chest and he started to wheeze. Cll He rolled slowly sideways and started to twitch, And slid unceremoniously into a ditch. As he lay in that storm drain he whispered, "By heck - I think I 've arrived at my very last check."
i And with that he expired, and his spirt rose high; Now he runs with that great Triple H in the sky. Where the trails are all downhill, and angels in white, Serve you tankards of Keo all day and all night.
So all you young hashers still eager for glory, .."':- Reflect on the moral of this tragic story. -� C. D. HAY ElECTRICAl� . - Though there's glamour and honour in leading the pack, 5, MAKARIOS AVE. - Its a bloody site safer to run at the back! NICOSIA, TEL. 02-445839 --•
6 H' 5/LVER JUBILEE QUIZ COLUMN FOR THE BROAD MINDED!
1. WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU S.C. B.'s ...... ? CROSS BILLY JEAN KING WITH BO DEREK? a case of 2. WHAT PART OF POPEYE NEVER RUSTS? 3. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN STEADY EDDIE'S LADA mistaken identity AND A JEHOVAH'S WITNESS?
4. WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN "OOH" AND "AAH"? ACCUSED! 5. WHY ARE THE STARSHIP PETER ROBINSON JACK BLOCKI "ENTERPRISE" AND TOILET PAPER SIMILAR? 326 RUNS 26 HARES 767 RUNS 56 HARES
6. WHAT'S THE CLOSEST THING TO SILVER? 7. WHAT IS WORN UNDER IAN McCARDLE .. ,S KILT?
STEWART GLANFIELD 323 RUNS 20 HARES 82 RUNS 8 HARES
Every Tuesday afternoon, you will find 4 mature gentlemen, limbering up in preparation for the aclivities and declivities of yet another hash. Defying the challenges the hares have set, rubbing shoulders with mara thon runners, hill-climbers and distinguished, fit young athletes, these 4 senior hashers will be there, sometimes ahead of the pack, sometimes behind. Always striving to complete the course, their golden rule is never to arrive back at the RV any sooner than the rest of the pack, lest they should 8. WHAT DO YOU CALL A CHILD unfairly partake of one drop more KEO than would be their fair share. RAISED IN A HOUSE OF ILL Being experienced hashers, they have, of course, been aware of the REPUTE? practice known as short-cutting in which some less scrupulous runners - 9. WHAT HAPPENED TO THE FLY S.C.B.'s - indulge from time to time. ON THE TOILET SEAT? One can imagine their horror when it was recently suggested that this 10 WHY DID THEY HAVE TO CALL . abbreviation might apply to them. As far as they are concerned S.C.B. does OFF THE LEPERS HOCKEY GAME? not mean Short Cutting B's, not even Secret Carslberg Boozers. No, in their case S.C.B. simply means Sexagenarians Check Better and they ANSWERS ON PAGE 14. are members of the Senior Citizens Brigade. Short Cutting? Bolony! Gentlemen, may your dignified presence con- tinue to grace the hash..... On! On!
1-P SILVER JUBILEE 7 wno�s wno EPISKOPI
� HASH HOUSE HARRIERS ),1\ ASHLEY ADAMS "So are they all, all honourable men." -Shakespeare DAN ARCHER 98 runs 10 hares 9 runs 1 hare •An ambassador Ison honest man sent 'An every-day story of country folk. • to lio abroadfor tho good ofhis country • · BBC • Wonon
DON ARNOTT THE JOINT MASTERS OWEN BEAMISH (EX 'ON PRES) runs 2 hares 323 runs 20 hares "Whenshall wethree meet again 40 "Whato'cr he did was done 1vr/IJ so "Anda woman ISonly a woman. but a In thunder, l1ghtnrng or rn ram?'·Shakespeare muchease. inh1m alone'/was natural to goodCI!}Br IS 8 Smoi GRAHAM BELL JACK BLOCK! BOB BROADBANK ANDREW CAMERON (OLDESTEPI HASHER) 32runs 0 hares 14 runs 0 hares 42 runs 3 hares 767 runs hares "HeWliS tho • 56 mildestmannt�rd man "Wherelarge sumsof money are walka m11/lonmiles onefor of your 'Better to keep your mouth shut "I'd · ron and By concerned. 111s advrsablo to trust • - appear stupid, thanto Open it and re- sm1/es. Jolson • • Chnstie moveall dou bt" - T wain nobody MIKE CAWSON PAT CRAFT JOHN CRUICKSHANK JOHN DEBANK 9 runs 0 hares (HASH MASH) 60 runs 3 hares 22 runs 1 hare "Headmast11rsh8 VIIpa wors at 1/JIItrdis 249 runs 16 hares 'II is novor difficult to dlstlngulsll 'Men of few wordsare the best men.· pasa/ with which Primo Ministers hav11 'Oh. to have a time house/ To own the between a Scotsman w/111 a • Shakespeare never yet beenInvested. •. Churchill hearth ond stool ond all r - Colum grievance and a ray of sunslllne. • ·Wodohouse 8 1-PSILVER JUBILEE MIKE DICKENS IAN DOBSON FRANK DOLAN MICK DONOVAN 13 runs 0 hares 13 runs 0 hares 169 runs 20 hares 158 runs 20 hares 'Give a man a pipe he can smoko ' 'Travel broadens Ihe mind.'· Proverb "For every parson wtsltmg to teach, 'Not drunk 1s he who from the floor can · Thomson there are thirtyno/ wantmg to be taught. • nso alono. and still drmk more.• ·Sellar ·Peacock BOB EVANS OWEN EVANS JEREMY FOWLER NOAH GAMP 17 runs 1 hare 13 runs I hare 21 runs 2 hares 4 runs 0 hares 'Whenconstabulary duty's tobe done. 'Chlkllenshouldbeseenanclnotheard• "The COOkwas o good cook as cooks 'Childrenha venever been very goodat A policemans k>/1s nota happy one • /lstenmgto /herrelders. but they have · Proverb go: and as cooksgo. he went • • Saki ·Golbort neverfailed to imitate them.··BaJdwrn RUN AND HARE STATISTICS ARE CORRECT AS AT 31st AUGUST 1992 STEWART GLANFIELD NIGEL GLANFIELD 82 runs 8 hares 13 runs 1 hare 'But/in not asthink as you drunk I am • 'Achtlddeservesthemaximumrespect: -Squire 11 you everhave something disgraceful In yourmind, donlson's Ignoreyour tenderyears. • • Juvenalis MIKE GRIFFITHS EDDIE HARDING IVAR HELLBERG TOM HELLBERG 8 runs 0 hares 42 runs 4 hares 16 runs 0 hares 5 runs 0 hares 'Jog on. Jog on, h foot-path way. • 'An honest man's the work or t o noblest 'The army ages men sooner than 1/Jo •Just at /he age 'lwixt andboy youlit.' • Shakespeare God.' ·Bums law and pllllosophy• • Wells ·Sco11 H'SJL JUBILEE VER 9 •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• • • • • • • • SPOT THE • • • • • • • • • • DIFFERENCE • • • • • • • • COMPETITION • • • • • LINDSAY IRVINE • There are two differences between Otto • OTIO FLICK • (EX 'ON PRES AND WORDS) Flick and Lindsay Irvine. • uncertam 145 runs 14 hares • • "len brnom Borlinerr • Kennedy "I have como to regard tfto law courls • Answers on pages 36 and 37. • not as o calhedml but rather as a co • • smo. • • lngroms •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• JOHN LEWIS BRIAN LIDDELL BRIAN LORD TOM MALEY 14 runs 1 hare 360 runs 33 hares (EXHASH BARD) 177runs 11 hares "Heweats the rose "IfmuSIC be the foodof love.play on.· 521 runs 38 hares "Hewas a scholar. anda npe and good Ofyouth uponhim.· - Shakespeare -Shakespeare "Formen may comeand men may go. ono. • ·Shakespeare But I go onforovor. • ·Tennyson IAN McCARDLE PHIL McEVOY KEVIN McKIERNAN TOM McSHERRY (HASH ASH) 1 run 0 hares 26 runs 1 hare (HASH BARD) 126 runs 11 hares "Ignoranceol lhe law excuses no 'TelevrSIOflrs more mtorostmg l/111n 58 runs 4 hares man.· "Great chwllatno' tho puddrn· race.· ·Selden people.· • Coren "Poemsare made by foolslike me.· -Bums ·Kilmer DUSTY MILLER BOB MOUNT MIKE PETERS LUKE PETERS 'ON PRES AND WORDS) (EX 14 runs 1 hare 132 runs 9 hares 50 runs 1 hare 124 runs 18 hares "A hair on lhe head is worth two on "Whenbuild wo lot us think lhat we "A chip of the old block.· • Proverb 'Then he will talk - good gods. how the b111sh!' • Anon build forever.· • Ruskin ho will talk!" • Lee 10 H'SIL VER JUBILEE JOHN QUINLAN PETER ROBINSON PETER ROBINSON (JNRJ DEREK RUST runs 5 hares 80 (UTILEFART) 38 runs 2 hares 71 runs 3 hares "A bad workman always blames his 326 runs 26 hares "A life on 1110ocean wave, "Exerc.se ts bunk Ifyou are healthy IOOISc• -Proverb "71•e First Blast of the Trompet A trome on 111e rolling doep • you don1 need it; 1f you are stel< you Aga/ns1111a Monstrous Regiment of ·Sargent slrouldn'l lake 11.' Ford Woman· -Knox PETER SAUNDERS DAVE SMITH RICKY SMITH ROBBIE SMITH runs 6 0 hares fONPRES) 62runs 6 hares 51 runs 4 hares "The onlyway to bO Sllro ofcalctung 188 runs hares 17 "My undersumdmgof women goes 'OI1t'sntee to get upm tho mormn' a bus IS to m1ss tho one beforeJt • "The artMedicine of consists o/ onlyns far as thopleasures • Buill's nicerto stay m bod· • Chesterton amusingthe patientwhile Nawre - Coino -Lauder cures the disease • - Voltasre RICHARD STENTON CHRIS UPTON PETER VISAGIE MIKE WALLER (EX 'ON PRES) 32 runs 3 hares (HASH WORDS) 51 runs 3 hares 540 runs hares 51 'He smks mlolhy depths with 88 runs 8 hares "When two Englishmenmeet, lhelf "Company. VIIIBinouscompany. hath bubblinggroan. · - Byron "When 1 was a 1/JdI serveds torm firs/talkis of the• weather been the of me• -Shakespeare spoil As olflceto boy an Allomey·sfmn • -Johnson -Gdben ALL BFC OFFICERS "Love, friendship, respect, do not unite people as much as a common hatred for GEORGE WHITE something." GERRY WRIGHT 52 runs 3 hares (HASH CASH) "Love still has somotlung ol ll1o sea • 49 runs 5 hares -Sedley - Chekhov "Blind lnsh referee!' -Boyce H' S/L VER JUBILEE 11 NICOLAIDES ANDREAS PANAYIOTOU FOR GOOD LOOKS congratulates all AND members past and BETTER present, of the VISION TEL.62277 LIMASSOL EPISKOPI HASH HOUSE HARRIERS VISITORS on their Silver Jubilee TOCYPRUS! You can be fitted with SPECTACLES or FOR THE MOST RELIABLE CONTACT LENSES within the duration of your WAY TO GET TO THE RV stay, however short, even at 24 hours notice and (and back) at hair the price you pay in Europe. FILL UP WITH SOFT CONTACT LENSES available from stock at only C£45. ESSO ESSO PETROL STATION NICOS S. NICOLAIDES CO. LTO & EPISKOPI Optical House, 7, Dem. Nicolaides Street. TEL: 221647 P.O.Box 22, Tel. 362277, Tlx 2602 Limassol. Also Replacements by Posl. YIANNIS WELCOMES ALL FOR A WIDE SELECTION OF LADIES AND GENTLEMEN'S SHOES MEMBERS OF EPI H3 AND AT VERY ATTRACTIVE PRICES CONGRATULATES VISIT THEM ON THEIR SILVER JUBILEE. SPYROS KLEANTHOUS SHOE SHOP COME AND CELEBRAT£ WlTH OUR SPECIALITY MEZ£ * BONDU BOOTS • SPORTS SHOES LIVE • FORMAL FOOTWEAR MUSIC * MADE TO MEASURE SHOES *REPAIRS OF SHOES AND ALL LEATHER GOODS DODGE CITY SHOPPING CENTRE EPISKOPI TEL:221608 12 If'SILVER JUBILEE , For individually created bespoke suits, trousers and shirts in three or four days. fawOJ Poftery ftudio "'fhop KOLONI - PAPHOS Tel. 06-234804 Telefax 06-245636 (on the Umassol- Paphosmain road) J.G. KARAYIANNIS 11, Saripolou Street, off St. Andrews Street, LIMASSOL Tel: 36391"1 British materials hand crafted and tailored by a graduate of London's Tailor and Cutter Academy. ONLY 3,5 km AWAY FROM KATO PAPHOS Gives you Savile Row quality at ready to wear prices. GEORGE'S FLOWER SHOP *Freshly Cut Flowers REGIST ERED ESTATE AGENCY * Personalised Arrangements PHILIOS HADJIGEORGIOU *Bouquets WELCOMES ALL EPI HASHERS! * Indoor Potted Plants * Agents for Interflora - For Sale: Flats, Villas & Land -Hire Cars FLOWERS FOR ALL OCCASIONS -Flats Property Management LOCAL DELIVERYSERVICE GEORGE PETROU PISSOURI BEACH APTS. LIMASSOL- CYPRUS DODGE CITYSHOPPING CENTRE TEL. 05-221058, Res. 394885 TELEFAX 05-221891 EPISKOPI TEL: 05 221616 H' 5/LVER JUBILEE 13 THE PSA ON-ON GAME Based on Run 1265 voted unani Check4Q Check 11Q mously the best hash in years of 25 When On Pres does not know who Name Stewart Glanfield's favourite Epi H3 laid by Mike Peters and John found the On, who is the helpful chap swimming resort Quinlan. who volunteers? A (i) Any European wine lake A (i} Tom Maley A (ii) The vat in the Keo brewery RULES A (ii) Derek Rust Check 12Q You must study the Questions given Check5Q Why did steady Eddie Harding below and guess which Answer your Why do soldiers and airmen go on choose a Lada? hares considered the most appropri leave but sailors take liberties? A (i) He thought that "Lada" was ate. A Don't know. We have never Russian for car been out with:- A (ii) He thought it was a better It you select the correct answer which (i) George White competition prize than dinner for two will be shown on the Hash Map as A (ii) Peter Robinson at the Moghul (i), A(ii), and A (iii) ON-ON you may (iii) Mike Waller move on to the next check. Incorrect Check 13Q anwers shown as A (i), A (ii) or A (iii) Check6Q When did Hash Ash, Jan McCardle, FALSE strictly mean that you cannot What is Doc Dave Smith's favourite become Hash Flash? proceed without some dirty short cut summer expression? A (i) When he set fire to his sporran ting to catch up. An ON-ON-ON is a A (i) Time for another beach run A (ii) When he did the Highland Fling special award and you may skip a A (ii) Keep heat stress free with a check. A FALSE-FALSE is a penalty clear pee ON-ON-ON tor serious offences which requires How many gas- bott.les did Tom Me you to go around again, on comple Check7Q Fagin leave in the OM stores? tion, with Brian Lord. This self-as Dusty Miller, the only On Pres whose A (i) 1 00,000 sessment game relies on the integrity crits came with sub-titles once said A (ii) . 1 ,000,000 of the Hashers.. . b.ut we weren't is "Jimmy, I must gang o'er the braes for sued with any. tae get the messages wi rna bairns". It you complete the PSA ON.ON A What did he mean? GAME without cheating send a crate (i) No hashing today, chaps, I'm of Keo to the address below for your off shopping with the girls PSA International 1994 Calendar: (ii) I say, James, give my Make a RVQ tow M Peters/J Quinlan What is RAF Legal Lindsay Irvine's PSA International favourite book? Check8Q Box 99 S .Rockall A(i) "Biggles Goes Soliciting" What is Hash Words, Peter Visagie's A(ii) "Famous Dhekelia Hash Vic official title? tories" A (i) Solicitor-Lance Corporal A (ii) Attorney-FieldMarshal Check 1Q Why doesn't Pat Craft like John Check9Q Cruikshank's d0g? Because he re What is thecollective IQ of the regular lieved himself over Pat's PSA members of the Hash? A (i) New cool boxes A (i) Over 1,000 A (ii) New garden wall A (ii) 10- 1,000 A (iii)Under 1 0 Check2Q How did Don Amott navigate his fight Check 100 ers over Cyprus? Why did the three old Paramali village A (i) With Jack Blocki's sextant idiots, Frank Dolan, Mick Donovan A (ii) He followed the signs from and Richard Stenion wear look-a-like ANSWERS TO QUIZCOLUMN ON PAGE 7 Erimi bridge long bloomers? "li3Nio!OO 31UNI ±!03:>\f�\fSVM 3H3Hl'Ol A (i) To frighten the goats -��0 03SSid.l09 3H '6 J.OOIJdS"13H.l01J9 V '9 Check3Q A (ii) To hide their Shrinking Assets 9NIHJ.A1:13113 'L 'S11VBSIBDNVIJ 3N01 3H.l '9 What is green and round at the front? SNOONmti;IO.;J9Nili001 snNVUn :>�:>UJ:> HJ.oaA3Hl ·g 'S3H:>NJ t 1noav •• A (i) Col lvar's Morris Minor 'SS3N!JMS.HVAOH3r V NO IJOOO3HJ. 3S01::JNV::l 3H 't A (ii) Gerry Wright's tum oAO 3AI10 Nl SJ.nd3H 11;1\fd 3H.l Z 'OJ ::JOV 'I 14 1-PSILVER JUBILEE HIGH GROUND � 4]? GOAT QHOLDING ('\ BUILDING V (D�WNG) HIGH GROUND HIGH GROUND HILLVIEW APARTMENTS RESTAUR ANT & STEAK HOUSE We rent fully furnished Apartments at Pissouri village, long or short terms Also you can visit our HILL VIEW RESTAU RANT on the ground floor For reservations call George at 221972 P. O. Box 72 Pissouri Village Limassol Cyprus IP SILVER JUBILEE 15 The Hashers Choice! adidas* UMASSOL'S NEWEST SPORTS EQUIPMENT STORE CONGRATULATES EPISKOPI HASH HOUSE HARRIERS ON THEIR 25TH ANNIVERSARY SILVER JUBILEE Come and visit our brand new Store where you will find ranges of the World's most famous brands of Running Shoes, Sports Clothing Basketball & Football Equipment's Swimwear WE OFFER 10°/o DISCOUNT TO ALL H3MEMBERS JUST USE THE PASSWORD ON! ON! • SALE GOODS EXEMPTED BORN IN U.S.A. 193 MAKARIOS AVENUE, LIMASSOL. TEL: 05-374883 16 H'SlL VER JUBILEE MAn AND ENGLISHMEN Jous By Randy Wayne White ' Several years ago, I was in Medan, hash run. another (it's a fine thing to hear Eng Sumatra, which is about as bizarre a But if we ran in this weird country, I lish spoken while you're in the grips of place as the Western mind can imag wanted to know, might not the police Road Jaundice), when suddenly ine, what with its lunatic motorized assume we were fleeing some outra someone blew on a hom and yelled rickshaw traffic, wailing calls to the geous crime, and open fire? won! On!" and everyone started run mosque, and work-fried dog fritters. No worries, the Aussies insisted; the ning at once. Not down the road, mind Spend a couple of weeks there, and running group - the Medan Hash you, but cross-country. We ran up you'll understand why no town on House Harriers, they called it - had a hills, through a pasture, scattered a earth would consider choosing Medan long and interesting history on the bunch of ducks in someone's yard, as its sister city (except maybe Phnom island and was well known in all quar then crashed our way through a pretty Penh, Cambodia, where opium ters. chunk of jungle. Just when I'd decided smokers and sexual deviants still have For reasons you will soon understand, I couldn't go much farther at such a some say). I had been in Sumatra a I don't recall a lot of what went on at pace, the front runners stopped and lot longer than I'd wanted, but not my first hash run. It was in a rural area began to hunt around in the grass. nearly as long as I' d agreed to, so I southwest of Medan; I remember that. "Looking for the scent," I was told, was wandering the streets, lost as The Australians were there, of course, which I later learned meant they were usual, enduring a grumpy bout of Road as were men and women from the looking for a trail of paper scraps that Jaundice when I sought refuge in the Netherlands, England, Scandinavia, a pair of runners - the Hares - had laid bar of the Pardede Hotel. It was there several Asian countries, and prob ten minutes earlier. that I fell in with a group of Australians ably some other places, too - about About the time I caught my breath, who invited me to join them on a ten 30 people in all. We were standing someone yelled "On! On!" again, and kilometre jog - what they called a around talking, getting to know one off we ran once more. And that's the H'S/L VER JUBILEE 17 way it went for an hour or so. We ran the Handbook a mainstay piece of through jungles, waded creeks, loped travel equipage, and pack it right _ I down hills until the front runners lost But ultimately, along With other necessities like clean the trail. Then we all split up to search socks and Lomotil pills. The editor of out the correct path. It was like no run all of them came for the book is an Englishman named I' d ever done before; certainly it was Tim "Magic" Hughes (for reasons 1 a lot more interesting, and not just the same reason still don't understand, all Harriers must because of the unusual route. My have nicknames) and he also edits fellow runners seemed to talk in code. people have been Harrier International magazine, a "Checking!" they would yell. "On back!" sporadically published periodical for "Slow the bloody FRBs!" (front-run hashing all along: hashing enthusiasts. Hughes, who is ning bastards). And: "No passing! the organization's historian and record You've won yourself a down-down to run and socialize. keeper, does all of this work on a when we get back to the piss bucket." voluntary, break-even basis using the Translation: Because you' re being offices of his Bangkok advertising competitive, you must chug a bever agency as a base for what now must you're from, whether you're male or age when we get to the beer cooler.) be the largest, strangest, funniest female, young or old. As it says in the Not that only competitive runners had running club in the world. organization's membership guide to chug beverages at the conclusion Recently I was in Bangkok and met li�es. "No matter what colour, nation of this hash run, no. The members with Hughes on the day after a hash ality or disability ... (as long as it is) formed a circle, sang bawdy songs r�n; he discussed the history and somebody who can take a joke ... who then contrived outlandish reasons wh a1ms of the Harriers with the same doesn't think he is better than any participants had to do down-downs; tongue-in-cheek cheer that pervades other... who is not chauvinistic and either beer or soft drinks. the back� one of the club's jogs. "Running the can listen to women... who is not a wash remainder of which was poured hash got its start in 1938 in Kuala bum-the-bra type and listen to over the drinker's head. can Lumpur," he told me, "at a colonial men ... someone not a know-all It so unds silly - well, hell, it was silly. establishment known as the Selangor _ arsehole... and who is not too inhib ut 1t was fun. I spent my time in the Club, which had a chambers behind it ited to scream On! On! virtually any c1rcle.� I spent plenty of time around where the bachelors of the day had where ... and drink out of your new the piss bucket outside the circle, too. their billet. The barrack served meals, running shoe." Like I said, I don't clearly remember of course, and was known as the In other words, hashers have stand everything that happened at my first Hash House. One day the members ards, just not very high ones. hash run, but I do remember this: By staged a run styled after the hare _ What I didn't know when I stumbled the time the event was finished, I'd and-hounds paper-chase game that upon the Hash House Harriers is that made several new friends, I'd learned was played in England, and the run the organization is worldwide. it has a couple of memorable songs, I had a was a great success. Back at the _ than 60,000 members affiliated n1fty new T-shirt, and Sumatra didn't more Selangor Club, after several rounds with 1,191 clubs in 138 countries seem so foreign after all. As for my of rum drinks, the man who founded including just about every far-flung symptoms of Road Jaundice, they : the organization, A.S. Gispert, pro godforsaken spot on the planet. weren't temporarily forgotten, they posed the name Hash House Harri Stranded in Oman? There are three were completely gone. ers. It became very popular among Hash House Harrier clubs in the Sul In short, the Hash House Harriers is the expats." tanate, and most of them run once a an international organization that at A second HHH chapter was founded week, year round. Missed your con tracts an interesting variety of expatri in Singapore in 1962, by an English nections in Mombasa: The hashers ates and wandering souls, all of whom man who posted an advertisement there meet every Saturday and Mon beli�ve that running is a good thing - inviting expatriates for a run followed day. utter Road Jaundice in Tonga, particularly when it's not done on some . by "beer, sausages, and mash." Al Tun1s1a,� Turkey, Andorra, Argentina, prissy road - and that socializing af though the hashing clubs became Algeria, libya, Guyana, the Falklands, terward is a great thing. Imagine a well known in British colonial circles or Cyprus, and the cure is only a hash group of sorority/fraternity travel war it wasn't until the seventies that the run away. There is an Antarctic clan riors witt:l a fetish for bush whacking began to attract a growing number of; of hashers (though the runs there are · a�d beer, and you'll get a pretty good world travellers and international seasonal), and there are still more picture of what hashing is all about. business people who were impressed chapters with headquarters aboard Not that you have to enjoy alcohol to by the organization's aims (promote oceangoing ships, such as the United have fun on a hash run. Drinking isn't physical fitness among the membes · Kingdom's HMS Edinburgh and Aus r a requisite, nor is it ever pressed. But get rid of weekend hangovers) an tralia's HMAS Stalwart. if you do enjoy a tankard or two after charmed by some of its prohibitionsd I kno� a little bit of this from my a uti-busting cross-country jog, you (no gaming or opium smoking at the � expenence, but mostly I'm taking it w111 not lack for companionship. meets; no using society funds to pay from the Harrier International World The best thing about hashing, though the fines of members who have been Hash handbook, which lists pertinent is that visitors are always welcome. I convicted in court). But ultimately, all t data for every chapter. I now consider doesn't matter who you are, where of them came for the same reason 18 fPSILVER JUBIL EE people have been hashing all along: to run and socialize. According to Hughes, the first world hash run - called the lnterHash Unconvention - was held in Hong Kong in 1978 and hosted by the Kowloon Hash House Harriers. Since then, the weekend celebration has been held every two years in places like Kuala Lumpur, Jakarta, and Syd ney, attracting thousands of mem bers from around the world. "Hashers run anywhere, anytime, re gardless of what Is going on around them," Hughes told me. For instance, the Kuwait Hash House Harriers had a good turnout tor their run on August 4, 1990-which, If you remember, was two days after the Iraqi invasion. ''That is one of the grand traditions of the club,'' Hughes continues, "to keep right on running. It goes back to the and running shorts from the local har It is precisely this mad-dogs-and days of the founding club at Kuala riers club didn't come running past." Englishmen attitude that makes run Lumpur, where members continued Members of the early club also served ning with hashers so much fun. Why to hash right through the outbreak of bravely in that war. "A S. Gispert, the the eccentricities of such a group war in 1939. In some book, a British founder, was killed in 1942 while de should void one's impatience with the officer tells how he had set his men in fending his post on Bukit Timah," said oddities of a foreign land, I don't know. ambush position in the jungle and Hughes. "Gispert's orders had been But it does. And those of us who have was waiting for the approaching en to detain the Japanese advance as suffered Road Jaundice don't much emy, and damn if 15 chaps in vests long as possible." care why. On! On! IN \!Cbr1Quncb of &rapes 3Jnn Tel. 052 -21275 PIS$0UR-IVI LLAGE S/L VER JUBILEE H' 19 THE BEST PLACE TO BUY A CAR FOR ALL YOUR DUTY FREE REQUIREMENTS VISIT THE DEALER WITH EXPERIENCE. NO WORRIES FOR YOU ! • Yo u'll get a car to use free until delivery of the car ordered, new or used • We undertake all your paperwork, e.g. Customs, Registration, etc • Insurance department • After sale service guarantee • Part exchange most welcome • Cars wanted for cash Full UK Specification vehicles • Large Savings to be made on UK prices • 3 Year Warranty transferrable to UK Mitsubishi Motors Authorised Dealer ANDYS MOTORS Andys Agathocleous Motors Ltd. MITSUBISHI 79, Omonia Ave., Tel: 379380, Limassol - Cyprus MOTORS 20 H'SILVER JU BILEE ' rave ers IN A BUCHAREST HOTEL LOBBY The lift is being fixed for the next day. DETOUR SIGN IN KYUSHI, JAPAN During that time we regret that you will be Stop: Drive Sideways. unbearable. IN A SWISS MOUNTAIN INN IN A LEIPZIG ELEVATOR Special today - no ice cream. Do not enter the lift backwards, only when lift up. IN A BANGKOK TEMPLE a es It is forbidden to enter a woman even a IN A BELGRADE HOTEL ELEVATOR foreigner if dressed as a man. To move the cabin, push button for wishing FROM THE SOVIET WEEKLY floor. If the cabin should enter more per IN A TOKYO BAR There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts sons, each one should press a number of Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts. by 15,000 Soviet Republic painters and wishing floor. Driving is then going al sculptors. These were executed over the phabetically by national order. · past two years. IN A COPENHAGEN AI RUNE TICKET OFFICE IN A PARIS HOTEL ELEVATOR IN AN EAST AFRICAN NEWSPAPER Please leave your values at the fron! desk. We take your bags and send them in all A new swimming pool is rapidly taking d1reclions. IN A HOTEL IN ATHENS shape since the contractors have thrown Visitors, are expected to complain at the in the bulk of their workers. IN A NORWEGIAN COCKTAIL office between the hours of 9 and 11 am LOUNGE A SIGN POSTED IN GERMANY'S daily. BLACK FOREST Ladies are requested not to have children 1n the bar. IN A YUGOSLAVIAN HOTEL It is strictly forbidden on our black forest The flatterning ol underwear with pleas camping site !hat people of diHerent sex, AT A BUDAPEST ZOO ure is the job of the chambermaid. for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with Please do not feed the animals. If you IN A JAPANESE HOTEL each other for that purpose. have any suitable food, give it to the guard You are invited to take advantage of the on duty. chambermaid. IN A ZURICH HOTEL Because of the impropriety of entertaining IN THE OFFICE OF A ROMAN IN AN AUSTRIAN HOTEL CATERING guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom , DOCTOR FOR SKIERS it is suggested that the lobby be used for Not to perambulate the corridor in the this purpose. Specialist In women and other diseases. hours of repose In the boots of ascension. IN AN ADVERTISEMENT BY A HONG IN AN ACAPULCO HOTEL KONG DENTIST ON THE MENU OF A SWISS The manager has personally passed all Teeth extracted by the latest methodists. RESTAURANT the water served here. Our wines leave you nothing to hope for. IN A ROME LAUNDRY FROM A JAPANESE INFORMATION Ladies. leave your clothes here and spend ON THE MENU OF A POLISH HOTEL BOOKLET ABOUT USING A HOTEL the afternoon having a good time. Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet AIR CONDITIONER soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of Coolers and Heates: If you wantjust con a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef IN A CZECHOSLOVAKIAN TOURIST AGENCY dition of warm in your room, please control rashers beaten up in the country people's yourself. fashion. Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages. FROM A BROCHURE OF A CAR IN A HONG KONG SUPERMARKET FIRM IN TOKYO ADVERTISEMENT FOR DONKEY RENTAL For your convenience, we recommend When passenger of foot heave courteous, efficient self-service. RIDE IN THAILAND Would you like to ride on your own ass? in sight, tootle the hom. Trumpet him melodiously at IN A BANGKOK DAY CLEANER'S first, but if he still Drop your trousers here for best resuits. ON THE FAUCET IN A FINNISH WASHROOM obstacles your OUTSIDE A PARIS DRESS SHOP To stop the drip, turncock to right. passage then tootle Dresses for street walking. him with vigour. IN THE WINDOW OF A SWEDISH OUTSIDE A HONG KONG DRESS FURRIER IN A TOKYO SHOP SHOP Fur coats made for ladles from their own Our nylons cost more than common, but Ladies have fits upstairs. skin. you 'II find they are best in the long run. IN A RHODES TAILOR SHOP ON THE BOX OF A CLOCKWORK TWO SIGNS FROM A MAJORCAN Order your summer suit. Because is big TOY MADE IN HONG KONG SHOP ENTRANCE rush we will execute customers in strict Guaranteed to work throughout Its useful English well talking. Here speeching rotation. life. American. H'SILVER JUBILEE 21 WINING AND DINING GEORGE'S THE (Y"'\)� '"'r<' ·�� VRAKA George Athanasiou TAVERNA Manager IN THE SQUARE, PISSOURI VILLAG E CAFE ENGLISH PUB TEL: 05-221940 AND COCKTAIL BAR TRADITIONAL CYPRIOT, BAR CUISINE AS WELL AS MANY ENGLISH POOL ROOM, DARTS, SPECIALITIES. CYPRIOT AND ENGLISH VIDEO MUSIC, PIZZAS MUSIC SEPARATE POOL ROOM Pissouri Square Te l: 22 1 177 STA VROS THE MANA GER WELCOMES ALLRASHERS WELCOME! ALL HASHERS! 1_...... �, :\�U THE LEMON � PAPHOS ROAD��� TREE �PISSOURI 9'� FISH TAVERNA � (Manager - Chris Karpis) VILLAGE * King Prawns PANG ERAS * Variety of Fish Cooked on Charcoal CAR RENTAL * Succulent Steaks SERVICE TAXIS AP���: NTS * Chris' Famous Hospitality � T � THE VILLAGE SQUARE II.t� PISSOURI TEL (05) 221255 or (05) 221149 22 H'S/L VER JUBILEE IN PISSOURI VIL LAGE TWO CAFE - RESTAURANT - BA R Our Specialities are: MEZE FRIENDS CHARCOAL GRILLED STEAKS CHOPS CHICKEN KEBAB FISH Taven1a HASH HOUSE HARRIERS STANI TAVERN ARE WELCOME TO MANAGER: FITOS • THE FINEST TRADITIONAL CYPRIOT CUISINE To all Hashers! • A WONDERFUL FRIENDLY ATMOSPHERE Enjoy a complimentary bottle of wine with your meal • OUR SUPERB HOME MADE CASSEROLES, FRESHLY PREPARED EACH DAY per table of four any time between Oct 21 - Oct, 28 • ALL WITHIN THE PERFECT SETTING OF THE PISSOURI VALLEY WITH VIEWS ACROSS THE BAY AND BEYOND PISSOURI SQUARE Our Atmosphere is in our Name! TEL: (05) 221640 SEE YOU SOON ANTONAKIS ATHANASIOU, OWNER Telephone 222527 e ri Squar T LEO'S · sou a s v e pI ORIGINAL CYPRIOT r n TAV ERN SPARTI PUB Drop in for a drink ARISTOS FOUTAS before or after your meal! Welcomes all Hashers in their Jubilee week and offers a complimentary bottle of wine to FRIENDLY ATMOSPHERE each table of four! ALL FA MOUS BRANDS OF SPIRITS Just say the Password ON! ON! LOCAL & IMPORTED BEERS FRESH LOCAL FOOD ON CHARCOAL COCKTAILS OPEN EVERY EVENING EXCEPT SUNDAYS ALL LOCAL WINES TEL. 05-221579 In the Square THE SQUARE PISSOURI Pissouri Village Te l: 221 772 H'SILVER JUBILEE 23 HA SHERS DOING IT A Tire Yellow Moke wins again. But that's not Mansell at tlte wheel. is it? ,.- A Rose between two thistles? ,.- Goinx home early. Archer? ..-- ���� 24 H'SILVER JUBILEE NTHE BOND U... '\ ' £ Chairmen of the Bored? had when /'m se1·enty!" No Keo. Brian? Serves you right for going rmmd twice ... What happt•ned to � Upton's fUmts? /\nother Sermon Ji'om St. Dave ... 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Cyprus 28 H' SILVER JUBILEE Abeille ~ ASSURA NCES VlCTOIRE Quotable Quotes "Index-linked (new for old) House and Contents Insurance" "Fire Insurance" "Motor Insurance" "Holiday Travel Insurance" "Yacht Insurance" "Transportand Marine Insurance" "Personal Accident and Medical Insurance" "Livestock and Bloodstock Insurance" it's worthta lking to Abeille Assurances Abeille Assurances Societe Anonyme d'Assurances (Incorporated in France) Principal Agents for Cyprus Yiangos S Joannou & Son (Insurance) Limited Libra House, Diagoras & 21 P Katelaris St, P.O.Box 1324 Nicosia, Cyprus Tel (02) 441633/441685/441822, Telex Cyprus 3686, Fax (02) 459788 H'SILVER JUBILEE 29 4 DODGE CITY SHOPPING Helen 's Lace Shop PHOTO FISHER EPISKOPI LACE OF ALL SHAPES & SIZES HAND WOVEN TABLE CLOTHS, CURTAINS Congratulates Epi Hashers on their 25th Anniversary Silver Jubilee BLOUSES AND SHIRTS ALL KINDS OF TYPICAL CYPRIOT SALES AND REPAIRS HANDICRAFTS & POTTERY WATCHES, GIFTS AND SOUVENIRS DEVELOPING & PRINTING (All sizes) RAYBAN SUNGLASSES AT DISCOUNT PRICES we sell cheaper because we are importers and wholesalers EPISKOPJ SHOPPING CENTRE Dodge City, Episkopi, Limassol ,Cyprus BFPO 53 TEL: 221353 Tel.221631 -VISION HIRE LT D - The RENTALS-SALES-REPAIRS Corner Ve getable - TELEVISIONS - WA SHING MACHINES Shop - DEEP FREEZERS FAMJLY GENERAL FOOD MARKET - FRIDGE FREEZERS - REFRIGERATORS * FRESH FRUIT AND VEGETABLES DAILY - VIDEO RECORDERS * ALL DAIRY PRODUCTS - SEWING MACHINES * 'FAMOUS BRANDS' FROZEN AND - RADIO CASSETTES - MICROWAVE OVENS TINNED PRODUCTS - GAS HEATERS * FRESH OVEN READY CHICKENS - ELECTRIC CLEANERS • FRESHLY CUT PORK CHOPS Andreas and family warmly welcome all Members of GENERAL ELECTRIC REPAIRS AND the Hash and their Guests on their Silver Jubilee VIDEO CLUB Episkopi Shopping Centre Tel. 05-221622 Paramali CORNER OF DODGE CITY Akroliri Shopping Centre Tel. 05-252351 Dhekelia Shopping Centre Tel. 04723558 EPISKOPI SHOPPING CENTRE TEL: 221180 30 lfJ5/L VER JUBILEE WAIL OF The THE HASH ORPHAN "HASHING!" He cried, "gotto- go - can't be late, I'll be at some dam somewhere near Troodos. Byee." It's strange how a hard-working spe cies like my Dad, who manages to 'arrange' lunch time drinks on one of Mum's "We're going round all the shops in Limassol" days, can amaz ingly beat us home from work on a Tuesday. By the time my little red March settles on it's parking slot be neath the trees, all I'm greeted with are the opening lines of this piece! Tuesday evenings used to be a family affair. B-B-0 in the garden, Salad and Emmerdale. Alas I'm lucky it I get an intelligible word from beneath that beard (come to think of it- I'm usually lucky if this happens at all -but believe me it's virtually impossible on aTuesday night!!!) Ah! Memories come flooding back. The inebriated figure that was my Father not four hours before. Whoops! There he goes again - sliding off the Me Pee White, Me Alrigltl... Me Pee Yellow, Me Sick Fellow chair, eyelids half closed. What's he got on the telly? Not that Israeli pro With Chief Doc taking over as 'On ers from St John's School come on gramme on sheepherding in the Golan Pres in the middle of the summer, a the Hash but they have had a lot of Heights?! Let's turn it off. "Hey -I was new acronym has appeared in the stick from 'On Pres since H M Inspec watching that!" Honestly?! So strange Military/Hash vocablary - the CPT. tor of Schools said that they Couldn't to watch the metamorphosis from Piggin' Teach. 1400hrs Tuesday to later that evening. What is the CPT? Those of us lucky enough to have I suppose I shouldn't wail - I get T No, it's not a Scotsman's mis-spelling sampled the delights of Val and Pat's shirts plus logo, which, to anyone of Combat Phytness Test, as sug cooking will have eaten off the Crafts' who's never heard of Hashing causes gested by lvar Hellberg. Patio Table in Anoyira. much confusion: "H3 - Into science Many would say that it means On a Tuesday morning'On Pres, who are you?l" Oh! And I do get the chance Carlsberg's Poor Taste. but those of is also Captain of Episkopi Golf Club, to dress as Robin Hood at the odd Hash Bash. us on the Epi Hash would go further can be heard to say, "Can't Play To Carlsber's Pissawful Taste. day but Can Play Tomorrow." Yes, I don't mind the absence of my Many of Cawson's Precious Teach- After the Hash many will say, "Come Dad every Tuesday pm (and the ab to the Paramali Taverna for a meal". sence of his brain Tuesday evenings!!) BUT PLEASE, PLEASE, I IMPLORE The current Hash dress in Ex-Cash's ALL YOU HASHERSOUTTHERE IN Pathetic T-shirts but we shall have J.C. LAND...... new T-shirts for October. KEEP HIM OFF. OFF. THE KEO!! Speaking of October, we had thought of having a Curium Pavillion Thrash for Anon CRAFT the Silver Jubilee. but we thought better of it and decided to go to a Cheaper Pissouri Taverna instead. But what does this have to do with Doc and the heat of the summer? Chief Doc ('On Pres) feels that he would be acutely embarrassed if any of us should suffer from Heal Illness while he is Hash Medical Adviser. He tells us all that we should drink lots of fluids before the Hash and pass the CLEAR PEE TEST, lest we collapse with heat stroke and Can't Pee Today or Tomorrow. H'SILVER JUBILEE 31 - crmon o " NO seeing the multitude of li Hashers, 'On Pres went down A a steep 'On In' into a shaded 1 RV: and when he was set, and the Pack came unto him: 2. And he opened his mouth, and addressed them, saying, 3. Blessed are the Hares: for without them we should have no Hash. 4. Blessed is Hash Cash: for without him paying we should have no Keo. 5. Blessed are they that curse the JC: for they shall be comforted. 6. Blessed are they that do hunger after Nuts and do thirst after Keo: for they shall be filled. 7. Blessed are the Harriets: for they shall become Hashers one day - Box ing Day. 8. Blessed are the Pups: for they shall be called the Children of the Hash. 9. Blessed are the pure 1n wimping 'The ·on Pres opened /tis 11/VIIth" out: for they shall see Stewart- lead ing them as quickly as possible back JC; and it showeth the way to the front cannot drink Keo and Carlsberg. to the Keo. runners, like Brian Lord - and all that 23. Therefore I say unto you 'Take no 10. Blessed are Ye, when CBF shall follow him. thought lor Dhekelia, and what nuts revile you, and persecute you, and 17. Let your trash be obvious to all they shall eat or what beer they shall shall say all manner of evil against Hashers, that they may see the trail, you falsely, for Keo's sake. drink'. and shout 'On On'. 24. Behold the Trash on the bushes: 11. But Cursed are the Short Cutting 18. Ye have heard that it has been it neither shreds itself nor does it Bastards: for they shall inherit the said by one of recent times, 'Thou spread. Yet 3 Teachers are required deep gulleys across which they can shalt not run the Checks; and whoso to lay it. Are Ye not much better than not pass. ever shall run the Checks shall be in they? 12. And Cursed are they that are danger of the judgement of the Attor 25. Consider the JC in the bondu, persecuted for drinking Carlsberg: for ney General (Hash Words)'. how it tears at the flesh and causes theirs is the Hell of Dhekelia. 19. But I say unto you, 'That whoso blood to flow. 13. ever shall run the Checks shall be in Rejoice, and be exceeding glad: 26. And yet I say unto you. That even danger of getting lost, shouting "Are for great is your reward at the end of our ex 'On Pres, in all his vitriol, is not you?" in the wrong direction and end the Hash. as harmful as all of it. ing up miles behind'. 14. Nuts are the salt of the Hash: but 27. Take therefore your thoughts for 20. Ye have heard that it has been , if the Nuts be finished wherewith shall the Crit: for in the past the Crit has , said by them of old time 'Thou shall Ye be satisfied? Only on a 50th Run been taken thought of by 'On Pres: not commit false Geometry'. or a 1 OOth Run when sandwiches or but no longer. Sufficient unto each 21. But I say unto you 'That whoso sausage rolls shall be provided Tuesday is the thought for the future. ever layeth a trail outside the angle, aplenty. shall be damned in the Crit - quite 28. Criticise not, that Ye be not criti 15. Ye are the Has hers of Episkopi. A rightly'. cised. motley crew that runs on hillsides and 22. No Hasher can drink two beers: 29.For with what Crit Ye criticise, 'Ye cannot be hid. for either he will hate the one, and shall be criticised. 16. Neither do the Hares lay the Trash love the other; or else he will hold to 30. For everyone that Hashes shall and put it under bushes, but on the the one and despise the other. Ye give the Crit; and he that Hares shall 32 IP SILVER JUBILEE be the victim of it. Refuse and it shall deceive us with a multitude of false 48. Give us the vision to took forward be your undoing. trails and checks which follow not the to the day when at last we pass over 31. What Hasher is there of you whom, principles of the Hash Command to that great Hash in the Sky where 1f his fellow Hasher asks beer. will ments. the trails are smooth and always give him Carlsberg? 45. Endow the 'On Pres with wisdom downhill and our mugs runneth over 32. Or if he asks for nuts, will you give and mercy that his utterances may be with Keo forever. him an empty bag? tempered with justice, compassion 49. Finally, Lord, we pray that when 33. Beware of false Hashers, which and brevity. ever we are feeling weary and faint come to you in Hash T-shirts, but 46. Have pity on those who worship hearted and tired of the chase we will inwardly are ravishing females, or false idols, especially those who wish always find the strength to call "On! spies from Dhekelia. to drink from the font of Carlsberg. On!". 34. Ye shall know them by their tits, or Help them to see the error of their 50. And it came to pass, that when sexy Lycra running shorts, or their ways. 'On Pres had ended these sayings, cries of 'Lost It' again of 'Oh, for a 47. We commend to you those the Hashers were asleep from his Carlsberg'. amongst us who are old, infirm and in soporiferousness. 35. Even so every good Harriet bring any way afflicted, especially thy serv 51. For he spoke to them as one with forth good nooky; but a Dirty Dhekelia ant Stewart Glanfield. Grant him the no authority, but lengthy and boring, Dasher bringeth forth evil in the form wisdom to accept his frailties with and the prospect for the next year of beating 'On Pres in the last 20 good grace. was dreich. yards of the Dhekelia Dash. 36. Therefore whosoever heareth this drivel , and understands it, I will liken him to a True Hasher, whose house was built by Craft Enterprises: 37. And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was buill by our Hash Mash. 38. And everyone that heareth this drivel, and understands it not, shall be likened unto a teacher or a member of PSA: 39. And the rain did not descend, and no floods came, and the winds did not blow: there were no stresses upon that house: but it still fell; for il was built by Sssh!! You Know who. 40. And therefore I say unto you 41. After this manner shall Ye-pray: 42. 0 Lord, look down on us, miser able Hashers, and grant us every day an easy trail that we tear nor our flesh on the bushes of JC nor twist our ankles on the rocks. 43. Help us not to stray from the paths of righteousness into the ways of Jack Blocki and Don Arnott. For it is written that those who taketh the short cut shall find no pleasure in it. 44. Help us to forgive those who tryto The Ceremuny of the Annointment HJSILVER JUBILEE 33 OFFERS ON: FROM NOW Samara 1 .5 3Dr .J:l::MQ £2,490 Niva 4x4 Hard - Top .£4:;e6tl £3.195 Niva 4x4 Soft - Top � £3.295 Trolleys .£>3:4lf £ 190 Our New Model Introductory offer Diva 1 .3 4Dr £2.690 Diva 1.5 4Dr £2,990 ALL ABOVE PRICES ARE DUTY FREE If you are going for a trip abroad. We will look after the car - if you purchased it from ua, end store it in our covered Bonded warehouse FREE OF CHARGEI Before you return, give ua a cell end we wiU service it, clean It end have it reedy for you, FREE OF CHARGE! 0 > 2 LADA I 0. PHIVOS MOTORS Heed Office: 50, Makarioa Ave., P.O. Box 1787, Tel: OS-33744415/6, Fax: OS-336491 Telex 2742 PHIVMO CY, UMASSOL Branches: Nicosia: 02·445000, Larnaca: 04-635660, Pephoa: 06-247532 34 H'SILVER JUBILEE THE EPI DICTIONARY epic, a&n. Narrating con epiglottis, n, erect carti episode, n, series of re ing quality or attribute [e.g. tinuous achievements of lage at root of throat de peating events, incidental Cawson on Brian Lord] one or more Heroes [e.g. pressed during swallowing narrative [e.g. Introduction See Epi Epic] to Teachers' Lay epicedium, n, funeral ode epistolary, n, person with [e.g. McSherry on ex 'On weak bladder Pres departure] epicene, a&n, denoting person with characteristics • of both sexes [e.g. we don't have those on our Hash] epicentrum, n, point at which earthquake breaks out [e.g. first on on every Tuesday] epicurean, a&n, follower only I could go mum/ of Epicurus, who taught 11/e epiglouis in action "If highest good was practice lll'ice ·· of virtue esp. refined sen epilepsy, n, nervous dis suous enjoyment ease in which person be epitome, n, thing that rep comes irrational and resents another in mini sometimes falls to the ature ground an Epi.,lofary epistrophe, n, ending of several sentences with same word [e.g. Who picked up check 3? Tom Maley. Who picked up check 4? Tom Maley etc] till Epimreon epicycle, n, small circle an cpileptie? rolling on circumference of larger [e.g. S.C. B.'s] epilogue, n, concluding epidermis, n, thick layer part of speech to specta an epitome of skin on animals [e.g. tors epizootic, a&n, disease Hares listening to the Crit] temporarily . prevalent epigastrium, n, pit of the among animals [e.g. two stomach [e.g. repository for oj ien used in epistrop!tes hares laying false trails] ' Keo] epigenesis, n, formation epitaph, n, (epitaff) Welsh of organic germ as new /For a complete copy of "' product [e.g. Carlsberg] member of the Hash [e.g. "The Epi Dictionary" epigram, n, short speech Don Arnott] (original Greek language ending in witty turn of epidemic, a&n, disease version) please send 3 crates of Keo to: thought [e.g. what the 'On prevalent among commu Pres tries to do, but, of nity at special time [e.g. Stewart Glanfield drinking of Keo after Hash] Pissouri Village course. fails] Cyprus tire epilogut' epithet, n, Word express- H'SILVER JUBILEE 35 ON, ON,WITH OTTO!! Or will the real Herr Flick stand up ... Wehrmacht. Flid and FROM OUR REUTER Srnallhuu.sen had become chief CORRESPONDENT IN buyer:-. for the now thri ving NICOSIA Fine rts fin11 of Gruher. Tuesday 27tll Orwlwr /992. Geering and Von Strohm (Bueno), Airc") inc.! Not ..,o m�ist� nois. and in a Di�turbing ne\\" ha� ju... t '\tartling expmc he revcab the reached u� that one oft he most real stor) behind the man who sought after azi war crimi fa iled to deliver to the FUhrer. nals of all time i� alive and the pricele:-.� painting by Van well and living in the i'>land or . Clomp 1-.nown as .the fallen Cyprus! M::tdonna with the big boo The reve lation has just been . bies. made by one Ronnh.: Artob . . It appears that Flick. re �lring a cousin of the now legendury vengeful FUhrer even more Rene and custodian or hi-. than post war Nazi Hunter�. hitherto unpublished third se fled initially to Cafe Rene and ries of diaries. then. disguh.cd a:-. an English Readers may know of the no ainnan. was o;muggled QUI of torious Gel!tapo officer Olio France along with Farrfa, and Flic!... \\ ho along with his Carstuir:,; sumct imc in 194-1-. henchman Engel.ben Von Thereafter hi!. movement)> are Smallhausen rerrorbed the . unclear untiI records shO\\ 1 hal small French town of ouvion in llJH5 his talento; as aGco;tapo in 1941 and IY42. interrogator were recognised It had hitherto been thought and he W 36 1-P S/L VER JUBILEE Great Sporting Moments Dhekelia Dash November 1991 HOW 'ON PRES SNATCHED DEFEAT FROM THE JAWS OF VICTORY! But watch ... elderly Dhekelia 'On Pres far 100 yards lead with behind, but soon to 200 yards to go •..... hobble past to a shameful victory. Message 106 VZCZCEAAO 1 00 HH RESTRICTED PP RBQPSE DE RBOWC 0102 2270940 COMMCEN 12SU ZNY RRRRR 10 AUG 1992 P 1009 15Z AUG 92 EPISKOPI FM MODUK TO TPS EPISKOPI BT E E D �IC ��/�Pi/�JH I SPORT IN CONFIDENCE I SPORT IN CONFIDENCE FOR ON PRES EPISKOPI HASH HOUSE HARRIERS. FROM CHAIRMAN JOINT SERVICES SPORTS CONTROL BOARD. SUBJECT IS BRITISH OLYMPIC TEAM 1996. MESSAGE RECEIVED FROM PRESIDENT BRITISH OLYMPIC COMMITTEE. REASON TO BELIEVE YOU HAVE EXCELLENT CROP OF ATHLETES. IN VIEW OF FAILURE OF BRITISH ATHLETES LAST WEEK IN BARCELONA 92 RECOMMEND YOU COMMENCE TRAINING FOR ATLANTA 96. IN PARTICULAR REQUEST YOU PRACTISE BATON CHANGING FOR 4 BY 100 METRE RELAY. DO NOT INCLUDE HERR FLICK IN YOUR TRAINING PROGRAMME. WE HAVE REASON TO BELIEVE THAT HE, LIKE OUR CURRENT ATHLETES, CAN SNATCH DEFEAT FROM THE JAWS OF VICTORY. SUGGEST YOU USE HIM AS THE BATON. HE IS ABOUT THE RIGHT SIZE. GOOD LUCK FOR SILVER JUBILEE IN OCT. BT RESTRICTED 1-PSILVER JUBILEE 37 Processionary Hasherpillars Personnel should be aware that at totally on a trail of pre-digested paper this time of year the processionary deposited by two of the worker hasherpillar is at its peak of activity. hasherpillars a few days in advance. These creatures emerge from their Personnel are advised that it is most lairs once a week (always on Tues unwise to interfere with this trail in any days) and make their erratic way for way as the normally docile creatures several miles across the bondu. They can become quite vicious if their can often be seen following each other progress is disrupted. The trail invari nose to tail along narrow paths nor ably follows a circular course and mally frequented only by goats and it ends up where it started and once the is thought that they may be attracted hasherpillars return they search fran by the droppings. A curious tically for any source of liquid, absorb phenomenom of the weekly migra ing vast quantities before retiring with tion is that only the male of the spe difficulty to their respective lairs. cies takes part and it is assumed that In view of the occasional damage this is some sort of prelude to mating caused to any crops in their path an which occurs on the other six days of eradication programme has long been the week. advocated, but despite 25 years of The creatures are easily recognis research no method of control has able by their red and brown colouring been found. In severe cases Tourex and the shrill cry which they emit to powder can be applied but this some attract those of their number who have times takes 2 to 3 years to work and become detached from the main body. has no effect at all on the older mem Being somewhat shortsighted the bers of the species known as expatrius hasherpillar relies for direction almost decrepitus. KYRIAKOU BOOKSHOPS Best selection of paperbacks Gift books for every interest Dictionaries - Educational STATIONERY For the office, school, home. GREETING CARDS for every occasion PANA YIDES BUlLDINC, 3 Grivas Dighenis Avenue (near Curium Roundabout), Tel. 368508 Limassol PAREAS ARCADE, Anexartisias - Athinon Comer (near ESEL), Tel. 375111 Limassol at COLUMBTA PISSOURI BEACHOTEL & The DOME HOTEL, Ayia Napa A wide selection of our books is also available from: YWCA - YMCA - CESSAC - WOOLWORTH and NAAFI shops. 38 H'5/L VER JUBILEE Gentlemen, that reminds me ... Heard of the Irish girl who bought a vibrator and broke Three prostitutes sat in a bar chatting about some of her front teeth. their more famous clients. "f had a Manchester United player once, " commented one of them. "He dribbled all A husband and his wife, playing bridge, were having a over me and scored in the first three minutes. What bad evening. Presently the husband got up from the about you ?" table, saying he wouldn 't belong-just going to the toilet. uOh, I made it with a Test Cricketer, " the second girl As the door closed behind him, his wife observed replied. "He moaned about the bad light at ftrst, but bnterfy, "For the first time tonight, I know what my once he was in, I thought I would never get him out. husband's got in his hand and what he's going to do And how about you, Suzy? Have you ever had anyone with it." fa mous in bed?" "Oh, yes, " the third girl replied, "I spent last winter with The village doctor was due to give the village mothers Father Christmas. ·· a lecture on sexual satisfaction but thought it best to tell "Really? What was he like?" his wife that he would be speaking on aeronautics. The "Well, he doesn't come very often, but when he does he following day one of the mothers stopped his wife in the fillsyour stockings!" High Street and congratulated her on the doctor's wonderful lecture. 1'm very worried,' a man told his friend, 'I got a letter this "We are going to be much happier women," she said, morning from a chap who threatened to kill me unless "And you're a lucky woman to have such an expert for I stopped screwing his wife.' a husband." 'That sounds very reasonable, 'said his friend, 'why "Funny you should call him an expert," said the wife, don't you just stop seeing her. That will solve your puzzled. worries'. 'No it won't said the first, 'the chap forgot to "You see, he's only been up twice, the first time he was sign the letter.' terribly sick and the second time his hat blew off." HAS·SEENS MAIL-SAGS CUCUMBERS THE "COSY TIT' BRASSIERE Co. WISHES EPI HASHERS HAPPY MAMMARIES NOTE: TO AVOID MISTAKES ORDER BY MODEL NAME The "COSY TIT" fits the best on any breast! 1-PSILVER JUBILEE 39 WINING AND DINING MELANDA RESTAURANT ��PfiLIO LIMfififiKI'' AVDIMOU BEACH TfiVERH OPEN 18 HAS Propr. ANDREAS TSIOLOS 'PEPI'S' Delicious food right on the beach! • PISSOURI BEACH'S OLDEST TAVERNA :I ' BAR, RESTAU RANT, GROCERY 0 § 'tl • OPEN DAILY, FOR THE BEST CYPRIOT ------' : DISHES, INCLUDING: PAPHOS LIMASSOL Moussaka, Stilado, Afelia, rich and tasty Meze, and superb village salads. Meland a • RIGHT ON PISSOURI BEACH ' PROMPT SERVICE - REASONABLE PRICES PEP/ AND FAMILY WELCOME ALL EPI HASH HOUSE HARRIERS TEL 05 - 221288 5 minutes from Avdimou crossroads, Limassol - Paphos road. KYRENIA BEACH BAR Sotiris & Iris congratulate the EPISKOPI HASH HOUSE HARRIERS on their 25th Anniversary Silver Jubilee. COME AND ENJOY A COMPLIMENTARY BOTTLE OF WINE WITH YOUR MEAL DURING HASH WEEK, OCT. 21-28 THE "KB". RlGHT ON THE BEACH AT EVDIMOU. TEL. 05-22 12L9 40 H'SILVER JUBILEE AT THE BEACHES ... Andreas and Demetris invite you to enjoy the friendly atmosphere and excellent food at AMPELI RESTAURANT Peppered steaks - our speciality! Ampelohori Pissouri just ten minutes from Pissouri beach DEMETRIOS AND ANDREAS Welcome all members of the HASH HOUSE HARRIERS, to our restaurant, and congratulate you all on your 25th ANNIVERSARY. FRESH FISH AND MEZE OUR SPECIALITY. For reservations, telephone (05) 221210 ARILAZ TAVERNA THE VINELEAF TAVER'N X EN lOS INVITES ALL RASHERS TO ENJOY A ~ LIVELY CYPRIOT EVENING IN OUR PISSOURI BAY POPUlAR RESTAURANT Our comprehensive menu includes our A TRADITIONAL VILLAGE TAVERN IN special Greek meze THE MIDDLE OF THE VINEYARDS OF TEL: 05 221040 PISSOURI BAY 300m FROM COLUMBIA ON THE BEACH AT PISSOURI PISSOURI BEACH OTEL WE SPECIALISE IN: KASTRO * VILLAGE MEZE * SEA FOOD SPEND AN IDYLLIC * GRILLED DISHES. BEACH DAY WITH US! ENJOY OUR SPECIALITIES IN THE Lunchtime snacks Bar EXOTIC AMBIANCE OF THE VINELEAF TAVERN. Water Sports Sun beds Manager: ATHOS TEL. 052-21053 fPSILVER JUBILEE 41 MORE HA SHERS DOING A. Slwuldn 't they swap shirts? Virgin ... You'd think PSA would huy him a new T-sllirt, wouldn't you'! Ftlf�itil•es fr om LA Law'! (fftlll' De1•il Surely tha( s not should Mark wltose T nicked my Keo'! 42 1-P5/L VER JUBILEE IT IN THE BONDU... .. ' A .. Uudememh the spreading Pine tree" A Funny looking T-shirr! 'Y As the sun .vinks sloll'ly in the west! 'Y Securicor on the joh Ricky and The Fu� guarding the HJ Blood Wagon The ,·oic:e of the ..,. Nation H'SILVER JUBILEE 43 AMBELONES Beach Holiday Complex Ampelohori - Pis ouri Bay Christoforos Pelekanos Ltd CONTRACTORS · DEVELOPERS P.O. Box 4604, Nicosia, Cyprus, Tel: 02-445815,443002. Fax. 02-457028 Pissouri Office Tel: 05- 221600,Pax 05 -222399 44 fPSILVER JUBILEE THE EPI EPIC by Tom M'Sherry (with apologies to M'Gonaga/1) Its 25 years since we made our first dash Thats when it began this Episkopi Hash Up hill and down dale and across the wide plains This Country of Cyprus will ne'er be the same The Hares go on recce to find us a trail Its usually Sunday and they're feeling frail But find it they must and lay down the trash Some do it with vigour and some with panache There's teachers, there's ExPats and RAF types There's schoolboys, there·s tourists and Military might They're doing their best to find every check Sometimes they·re just knackered, but who gives a heck At the start of each run the Hares give a "Spiel" Information is sketchy, somet1mes it's "no reat• So we don 't really know how long we will be One just shows commitment for that is the key Except for the old ones who've done it before They laugh at the Hares 'cause they know the score There's nowhere in Cyprus where they have not been So they take the short cuts and enjoy the scene Whilst new boys like me run all over the place Jack Blocki, Pat Craft. they just make their own pace fan Mac disappears we don't know where he's gone / think he just follows that Arnott called Don Doc Smith he arrives at the check full of verve To go down that valley does he have the nerve "Och weir he shouts "I'm just doing my best" · OPTICIANS Then promptly he disappears over the crest At 24 hours notice and at Both Ricky and Robby they stay with the pack Their old man's commitment they both of them lack half the price you pay in Dad's not seen again tillend of the run Europe we offer you Then he gives us all stick for not calling "On On'' • A wide selection of spectacle frames, and Checks they are found by all at some time Sunglasses. Some they are easy 'cause they're in a straight line But if there is doubt, a loud cry is heard gaily • All type of contact lenses. "f got that one, sure as my name's Tom Maley" • All kmds of prescription lenses. The Teachers who've been here since schools first began Have runners like Brian, they also have Frank • Plus our qualified and personal service. There's Richard with beard going greyer each year SHOP 1 And Mick Donovan who's just here for the beer 143, Prokymea Building Chr. Haggipavlos Str., Tel. 370845 Limassol Gerry Wright with his book collects aff the cash That's even before we aff start the Hash SHOP 2 He should be a "Jock" 'cos he is so thrifty Woolworth Terrace, Tel. 383692 Limassol In no time at all the charge changed to One Fifty Undsey, did you think that I could fo rget On this the best anniversary yet With your wit and your style when you were On Pres The Hash took no notice of words that you said Stewart Glanfield appears with his own Ryder Cup Brings Jeremy Fowler to keep spirits up "Its not spirit up� Nigel says with a frown "Its the KEO in bucketfulls that he drinks down" The Hashers have come from near and from far To run in the bondu and then have a jar The journey to Epi we'll make it worth while This 25th Birthday celebrated in style H'SILVER JUBILEE 45 The ecret ociety At a time when the boot of the British ians from the British garrison of brain-baking ninety-plus degrees. Add Raj is long reckoned to have been Episkopi who set off every Monday to this the good news that the 'Hares' raised off the world I have to report afternoonat about 3.30pm on a paper of this cross-country trial-by-ordeal that, unknown to the natives, a Secret chase round some rugged corner of have deliberately laid their paper Society composed entirely of citizens the Cyprus countryside. signposts over some of the most of the former colonial power is oper 'Crazy' sums up the custom as well as punishing, leg-gashing regions of the ating in the independent State of its adherents because at 3.30pm, for island and you'll begin to realise why Cyprus. most of the year, the temperature is a the sweat-caked runners, known as The gangs hold their meetings weekly; the 'Hounds', deserve the title of fa always in full society regalia; and al natics. ways in secluded parts of the island So what is the attraction? late in the afternoon so they can The answer is simple. All you need to perform theirstrange rites undisturbed become a good Hasher is the Incli and chant the attendant litany. All nation! Because age is no barrier to society members are fanatics and ... the membership, Hashers come to their guard their secret passwords jeal Meets in various stages of hyped-up ously. Their secret symbol is 'H3'. sharing of devotion. At one extreme you'll find Hold on! Before conveying this leak to the baby-faced young lieutenant Her Majesty's Opposition. or to the exercise, whose ambition is to complete the Cyprus High Commission, know that trail in ten seconds flat and shatter the the 'regalia' of the 'H3' is a pair of cot 'jolly old pain-barrier' as he hurtles ton shorts, durable plimsoles and a good like a randy billy-goat down dried-up singlet. I should also explain that the stream beds; at the other is the significance of 'H3'. when translated, comradeship overweight Brigadier in knee-length is - 'Hash House Harriers' - shorts, sporting his Douglas Fairbanks Now you're getting it! and liquid Junior moustache, who's convinced Yes, the Hash House Harriers are no it's dashed good for morale for a senior more than a crazy gang of British citizen to be seen getting on with the Officers and Cyprus Based U.K. Civil- refreshment! chaps -As ifto prove he's learned well 46 lf1SILVER JUBILEE from a lifetime directing manoeuvres, the 'Brig' trots quietly behind the pack, skillfully spying on the front runners from convenient hill-tops to discover the best short-cuts to bring h1mself home with not a whisker out of place. No one cares. The Hash is not a competition nor a race, just a wretched, muscle-wrenching slog across boulder-strewn ravines and cliffs, or a scarey hop-skip-and-jump through snake-infested gullies, espe cially behind Erimi and Pissouri, where the vipers lie out in family groups on social significance - a naked the hot stones as sunset approaches. rare young Cypriot wench of eye - bog The origins of 'H3' lie in the Far East. gling proportions, was conducting a It was founded 55 years ago in the highly-satisfying anthropological in Selangor Club Malaya, (a bastion of vestigation of her own in the hot em Empire if ever there was one), by a brace of an equally studious and na group of drunken rubber planters who, shade of a spreading carob tree, the ked young man. Settling down - no having come to the end of their teth Hashers had gathered, smiles of pure doubt to take notes - 'Happy' was, ers living alone in the green hell which relief upon their dusty features as unhappily, discovered by the lover is a Malayan rubber plantation, de they bit into hot meat and gravy pies who happened to have his trusty short cided they'd better do something pretty eased down by litre bottles of ice-cold gun near to hand - damn quick to preserve their sanity. beer. I joined them gratefully as a Hours later 'Happy' arrived back at To their everlasting credit their solu suffering traveller falling on a well in the start shaking like a leaf and bab tion was to arrange weekly gather the desert. ings in the biggest plantation cook bling like a madman. So lurid was his I found myself standing in a sweaty house, the Hash-House, whose sim description of his discoveries that, ring of smelly bodies listening to the ple purpose was to be the sharing of after spilling it, he was branded for usual tales of woe - tumbles in the exercise, good comradeship and liq ever more amongst honourable bondu, bleeding wounds caused by uid refreshment! (though jealous) Hashers as a sensa vicious thorns, and aches and pains tionalist raconteur of worthless repu Since 1937 the founders of 'H3' have and strains. tation! been acknowledged the world over Many less colourful tales can be told 5.30pm: My first bottle of Keo was as the shining lights of Hashery. but all of them seem to revolve round dead, the second already poised Amongst the stalwarts were the leg the reactions of local people to hordes comfortingly in my trembling hand. 1 endary 'Torch' Bennett and 'Horse" of mad 'lnglesi" appearing amongst looked again at my watch , and smiled. Thompson both of whom used to them like herds of heifer-seeking bul An hour or more still to sunset. The swear blind that, on taking to the locks on the rampage, bellowing 'ON Hash wouldn't end before then - Hash trail round the coconut and rub ON' like lunatics before disappearing Under the trees were stacked the ber trees, they were regularly dogged in a cloud of dust. insulated boxes full ofthe so precious by a magnificent, stalking tiger sport liquid refreshments and packets of ing pink stripes. Since, in the original My own dearest memory is of how, peanuts. 'Torch' and 'Horse' and all constitution of the The Hash it was when I got lost one stinking hot sum those Hashers who had ever lived to laid down that a Hasher's reputation mer's evening. I ended up blundering curse a lung-bursting bitch of a trail was to rest, not on his running prow through Erimi village square. Through would have been happy here - ess, but on the quantity of liquid re a binding film of sweat I saw all heads freshment he could consume before in the coffee- shop turn in disbelief At that moment I knew I was! as well as after the event, 'Torch' and towards me. Leading them in his 'Horse' have been held in highest chimney-top hat, cassock and broad esteem ever since. black beard was the portly village Priest. As shambled by he crossed 'Happy' Johnson too holds a special I himself, raised a glassful! of brandy to place in the hearts of Hashers. 'Happy' his lips and exclaimed: 'This sight is a was something of an amateur anthro bad omen! Drink deep my children to pologist and regarded his excursions turn away the Evil Eye!' into the Cyprus backwoods as an opportunity for impromptu cultural and For me though it was a good omen social inquiry: coming one day upon a because another mile brought me to shepherd's hut with a donkey teth the end of the trail and the real reason ered outside 'Happy' rashly decided why no true Hasher would miss the to investigate. To his horrified delight Tuesday afternoon flog round the Theabove appeared in 'SUNJET' the 1989 rocks for anything. There, in the black he found himself witness to a scene of lnflight Magazine of Cyprus AiiWays H'SILVER JUBILEE 47 CONGRATULATIONS TO HASH 3 ON YOUR SILVER JUBILEE Columbia Pissouri Beachotel Tel: 05-221201, Umassoi-Paphos Road (after Episkopi Base). rn Look for the signs! I HASHING WEATHER I ny attempt to review hashing subject dear to a hashers heart. Most weather must start from an trail layers are aware from seeing the A initial consideration of Troodos winter snows that it usually whether to hash or not. Bear in mind gets colder with height. They there at first, the composition of the Epi fore plan the summer runs in high hash. In these politically correct times, ground. This Is fine, provided that this contains more than its fair share there is not an atmoshperic inversion, of mentally, physically and height take place here in Cyprus, even in where temperature then increases disadvantaged members of the those months of July and August. with height. As a rough guide for the populace; Indeed in earlier times, they Then, the combination of heat and uninitiated, they should take care would have been more correctly re humidity make even the quaffing of when they notice that the froth on ferred to as a motley collection of Keo a demanding task. their Keo starts settling at the bottom elderly, comatose, varicosed veined, To aid in the planning of runs in this of their glasses. When this occurs it is pot bellied, garrulous misfits. Com demanding climate I have listed some better to lay the trail at sea level, or bine these olympian attributes with common meteorological words or preferably below. the ruggedness of the Cyprus terrain, phrases, and interpreted these for the ANABATIC AND KATABATIC and one is forced to wonder whether benefit of those whose brains have FLOW hashing here should only take place been corroded by Keo. in a secure environmentally control These terms refer to upslope and led environment, such as in the Offic downslope breezes. In the localities INVERSION ers Mess Bar. where we usually run, the odours Unfortunately, with the low mental The quoting of this word normally emanating from the ani of dead goats, age and eagerness to appear youth gets the attention of hashers as it can and cats may be wafted into the trail, ful that most hashers exhibit, runs be misconstrued as perversion, a so stunning the more frail of the par ticipants. DRY ADIABATIC LAPSE RATE This is the rate at which diabetic hashers lapse into drying their col leagues glasses, by downing the con tents. OCCLUSIONS Monstrous cavities in the teeth of eld erly hashers in which, amongst the detritus of plaque and nutshells, vast quantilities of beer may be stored for later consumption. It explains why they continue to be garrulous, tired and emotional well after the beer has run out. FOEHN A device which enables hashers to communicate with the Hon Pres, to enquire where the next hash is taking place. Named after the wind caused by the exhalation of breath through gritted teeth, which reverberates around the receiver. Mike Waller Meteorological Adviser to the Hash The 1\tmospherk General "at work'' {Atmospheric General) tP5/L VER JUBILEE 49 POPULAR BANK WELCOMES H.M. FORCES Wcktm>ck>C)J'MI'! \\( ll�kiRII\'���ut"\1.' ltlf h1dlcn I • Manager: AT HOS SPYROS IOANNOU ESTATES {P ISSOURI)Ltd CHRIS DEVELOPERS, LAND AGENTS Taxi Office BUILDING CONTRACTORS Mercedes Taxis We specialize in all types of household developments in Pissouri Village. 24 hour Service Our reputation for quality and service is unsurpassed and we have been responsible Happy to meet or for the planning and construction drive you to Paphos of most of the private villas or Larnaca Airports and appartments in Pissouri. Anytime! PLEASE CALL OR SEND YOUR TEL: (05} 221 848 ENQUIRES TO US ON FAX: (05) 221055 TEL (05) 221935 / 221380 P.O.Box 70 CAR PHONE 09525145 PISSOURI PISSOURI 50 H'SILVER JUBILEE Before taking a trip take a trip to Becky•s If you are planning a trip, whether for business or for pleasure call or visit Becky's Travel Agency. The friendly service, professional attention and Absolute Customer Satisfaction tfas been our tradition for thirty years. That's something to count onl f I SPECIAL FA RES Special fares for London-Lamaca-London. We specialize in arranging prompt and last-minute air-bookings between Lamaca and Britain. TOURS & CRUISES Organized tours to Egypt, the Middle East, Europe and America. For a free brochure and information on dates, fares, etc, call or visit our offices. Accommodations and car-hire facilities available. MEMBER • bccky'1 travel @ 1J • � agency ltd DJIDJEJ«Z ftU2' COOJffSI Limassol: Tel: 05-336712, Fax: 05·338242 Erimi: Tel: 05-234085, Fax: 05-338242 H'SILVER JUBILEE 51 Jordan Tri]!_ - May_'92 twas a cold wet February Hash. Jordan. The trail, laid by the teachers, Tuesday morning saw us all up bright had been well below their nor and early for the long drive to Petra mal abysmal standards. The via Madaba, Mt. Nebo, Kerak and the fire provided by Hash Ash had the Arnoun valley. Not only was this I journey through some magnificent warming power of a solitary match - indeed the Keo was warmer. Not even scenery, it took us through many his On Pres' witty, entertaining, informa torical sites mentioned in the Bible. tive, balanced crit could lift the Hash Mt. Nebo, where Moses first saw the from its morose mood. As the Keo River Jordan, was spectacular and flowed Hashers minds wandered to you could imagine the scene as it Is trips gone by-the Agony of Agros, the described in Isaiah 15:3; the biblical Rearrangement of Rhodes and the equivalent of seeing the beer from the Delights of Droushia were all fondly From our corrcspondellf in .Jordan start of the run in. The day also proved that our guide was a biblical scholar remembered. This led to discussion speed on to the airport. As Marina who was to put new slants on many of a'92 Hash Trip with destinations as had all our tickets we decided to per of the stories learnt at Sunday School, varied as Paphos and Peking being suade him to return to the rounda for some his words had a purely sopo mooted. Peter Robinson suggested bout. There then followed an enjoy rific effect quickly inducing sleep on Jordan would be a good trip to organ able half hour as we scoured the the long journeys. We arrived at Petra ise for someone who had time - did outskirts of Limassol searching for as the sun was setting over the red the Navy teach him nothing about Marina. On our third visit to the RV, volunteering! After many sleepless Marina was located and the sigh of nights, letters and visits to Becky's relief must have been heard in Troo 45 Travel, Peter eventually herded dos. assorted Hashers and others on a The formalities at Larnaca were com wonderful trip to The Hashemite pleted with less pain than we expected Kingdom of Jordan. and we were soon settled in our air As the coach collected us from our craft awaiting take-off and breakfast. 0530, quarter areas at we settled into Who was the Hasher who exchanged the seats to catch up on sleep unaware his orange juice for a gin and tonic? of the adventures ahead. These The flight was smooth and pleasant. 0615 started at by the third roundabout The currency exchange at Amman on the Limassol Bypass - the ap taxed the old mental arithmetic as we pointed hour and place where we all tried to obtain to the best rate. were to meet Marina, our beautiful Our base in Amman was the Amra guide from Becky's Travel. As no one Forum Hotel which has an excellent was in sight our driver decided to pool. After anhour to settle in we were introduced to our guide Hashim who took us on a whistle stop tour of the city. Built on seven hills the city is a bustling, vibrant place with many ar chaeological sites. The suburbs comprised modern mansions, the ar chitecture of some so outlandish we suspected they were built by PSA. To round off a hectic day we were col lected from our hotel in the evening by members of the Amman H4 who had organised a run and barbecue for us. The run was verydifferent from ours, it being a mixed hash in every sense. However the views were pleasant, company friendly and beer cool which resulted in tired hashers crawling into Marina and Hashim bed at the end of the first day in The Siq 52 H'S/L VER JUBILEE rocks of the area - a truly beautiful sight only just beating the cool beer and swimming pool of the Petra Fo rum Hotel. Wednesday heralded the highlight of the tour- a full day at the magnificent, mysterious, Nabatean city of Petra. Carved 2090 years ago out of the rose red lava rock of the area, the city housed an empire based on advanced agricultural techniques and control of the area's trade routes. Access was gained through a kilometre long tis- "Perhaps rile best presen•ed Roman city in the world" changed other than the mode of the pitch dark - an interesting lot the transport. After several coffee and Amman H4! souvenir stops we were deposited Saturday and Sunday were free days back at our hotel for a relaxing swim apart from a quick whiz round some and Amster. Friday morning and It desert castles and a visit to our guide's was off to the seaside for a float whilst home for tea and stickles. This was reading the paper. Our journey to the missed by those suffering from jippy Dead Sea took us through the beau tummy and Doc Smith's sympathetic tiful and fertileJordan Valley- at 4OOm treatment. A visit to downtown Amman below sea level, the lowest spot on on Saturday saw us all searching for earth.Our swim was accompanied by bargains in the Gold Souq. The name a mud bath reputed to rejuvenate the above the entrance -'AL SHARK Gold whole body. Most hashers looked Dealer' - made us suspect that bar better with the mud on! The feeling of gains would be hard to find. weightlessness as we floated reading All too soon Sunday evening arrived "The Treasury"· ... Petra papers was worth experiencing. Re heralding our departure to Cyprus freshed we set off to visit Jerash, and home. Stewart, in full Arab dress, sure known as the Siq. The quickest perhaps the best preserved and most looked more ethnic than the natives. way through was on horseback which complete provincial Roman city in the After such a hectic trip we were was the mode of transport chosen by world. Its strict and well preserved pleased that our return journey was most hashers. We were overawed by town plan, built around the colon uneventful. Many thanks must go to the spectacle of the place and in par naded main street, would be an edu Peter Robinson and Marina of Becky's ticular the varied colours of the cation to the designers of our present Travel for their hard work in arranging sandstone. That evening saw seven concrete jungles. In the evening an such an informative and enjoyable Hashers attempt a run in the wadis other hash with the Amman H4. They trip which left us all with a suitcase of surrounding the city. This proved to got lost going to the RV, so only we souvenirs and many pleasant memo us that the city was indeed impenetra ran as they considered the ground too ries. ON ON. ble though thankfully on our return the rough. There followed a barbecue in Dusty Miller bar of the hotel was not. A late start on Thursday enabled some to venture back to Petra for last minute pictures before boarding the coach for the return journey to Amman. A quick visit to the rock which Moses struck to bring forth water had 'On Pres (des.) trying the same to bring forth Keo. We then steeled ourselves for the longjoumey to Amman, follow ing the King's Highway which follows the trail taken by Moses and the desert railway so often attacked by Lawrence of Arabia. Was he lurking in the dunes as we passed? The Bedouin camps and camel herds served to remind us that we were following a trail used as a trade and transit route for the last 5000 years. Uttle seemed to have Happy memories! 1-PSILVER JUBILEE 53 Hashing and Flashing The Hashers hashed and the cameras flashed all over the Hashemite Kingdom on our recent trip. Here's a selection to . . rev1ve memones ... Camel tra111 ... /C)C) 2 .Hy/c•? ... A "When in Rome ... ?" A ''Gil•e us a /..iS.\ darling .. Tluw Dead (Sea) DucJ,s? 54 IPS/L VER JUBILEE • in HA SHEMITE land ..t. ·'more l'lhnir than the IWfil•es" "Y Petra 011 the mcl..s! look now bur I think we're being followed! Keo he's drinking ... H'SILVER JUBILEE 55 GEORGE'S LADIES & GENTS � £cusson HAIRDRESSERS fOQ Welcome all Hashers and their DECORATIVE ACCE00QRif,S wives on the occasion of their 25th GIIT0 TABLE WA RE Silver Jubilee Anniversary * Professionally trained Stylists experienced in all forms of hairdressing • Separate Salons for Ladies and Gentlemen Sea • Special note for Hashers - You're not missing anything - We close on Tuesday p.m.'s out of respect and sympathy for you! ON! ON! GEORGE PETROU Arch1brshop MakarrO!:. Ill Ave . 209A-B Tei.051-6U:.!U6 Va�rlr Vnonrdr Gala Chambers:GI.G2.G3. l.Jmassol Cyprus DODGE CITY SHOPPING CENTRE EPISKOPI TEL: 05 221339 WHEN YOU' YE PROMISED HER THE MOON &plasH I CAN DEUVER! • Chinese moon mask. • Lunar clock · goesthrough all the phases. • Collectable doll swinging on the moon. • Nes1ing sphere • lhe moon is in-side. "Taking the time to choose a gift I hal is 'just perfect' showsas much WHILST IN CYPRUS WHY NOT VISIT OUR love as the gin itself' I Rnd that"Pedect Gift"& at pia$� · FACTORY SHOP • Crabrrec & EvelynIOilelries. sh<;Jv.ng arriCiesond detecloble comes robles. • Porn led gloss cords.wu)Ciow boxes. honging� • lltoss & Ash deskoccessorres. keyrrngs MANY 112 PRICE BARGAINS ond bOOkmaks • A Wide selechon ol grlls leoluung lhc ON CYPRUS - MADE ����� WOfld of Beolux Potter • WhrmsiCol and romonhc greeting cord� QUALITY SHOES � • Handmade elhnic and CyptiOI jewellery • Fabr�c & lace hssue box covers. make up bogs and pol ·pourro hearts "' � ;;; 16.ChrysanlhOv Mylono 1::2. MokOriOS 3rd Ave � (neo• CyptusAirwoys). Tel 05 37756Cl. L •mo� "' LEATHEREX LTD Galoxlos Sh 56 1-PS/L VER JUBILEE Hash Mash's 250th Run! Tuesday 1st September saw a double celebration for Pat Craft. our amiable Hash Mash. Firstly 5 years of personal hard labour were rewarded by the completion of his restoration of an old village house in Anoyira where he and Val propose eventually, to spend their retiremen t years. Secondly he became only the 7th curren t member of Epi H3tohave completed 250runs. He chose the back garden of his new home as the RV. and laid tl1e trail to finish in the local village Winery. Our Flash was there to record the day. On On to 500, Pat. fPSILVER JUBILEE 57 The New Standard in Technology The NEW MITSUBISHI PRJERO The New MITSUBISHI PRJERO establishes a standard which others can only hope to follow Super Se lect 4WP: This advanced new system Multi-Mode 4ABS: The most advanced 4-wbeel combines the benefits of both full-and part-time Anti-Lock Braking system which can automatically 4WD systems. Full-time 4WD, high or low range adjust its operation according to tbe traction mode of loc.ked 4WD or rearwheel drive can be chosen. Super Select 4WD. Based on Mitsubishi's center differential YCl! full-time 4WD system. If the new Paje1pgets -stuck RevolutionarySports Suspe nsion: The revolutionary because one rear wheel hasfallen into a ditch, the dollble wishbone Sports Suspension developed in the reardifferential canbe locked by flicking a switch in tough Paris-Dakar rallies. It canbe adjusted from the cabin. This makes it easy to get away. the driver's seat (remote control) andfeatures three A synchronised front freediffere ntial allows the settings - soft, medium and hard-- forimproved driver to shift from 4WD to 2WD and vice versa stability and increased comfor t. while moving and under any driving conditions. Advanced technology, aerodynamic design, safety, comfort and luxury. MITSUBISHI PRJERO Designed for those who enjby life and driving Umaaaol Pepho. 0 FA IRWAYS Tel: (05)336969 Tel:{06) 236247 58 IP S/L VER JUBILEE ter Simmonds, in charge of the UN helicopter contingent at Nicosia, would take to the air in order to get to his favourite location. On one occasion, having landed at Episkopi Garrison and , left his 10 card in the helicopter and travelled to Paramali, he was unable to re-enter Episkopi Garrison as the ADP policeman did not believe him when he said he had "arrived from the heavens" when asked how he got to Episkopi. In the late 70's and early 80's the Hash went through a dull patch as everyone drove around in small Suzuki Jeeps, but once again in the Hash's 25th year the eccentrics have returned. How else would you describe a man who buys a Lada and is seen driving it in public. 25 YEARS OF HASH MOTORING to reach the sacred Keo. Thanks to the In all the atmosphere of excitement and remarkable Cyprus buy-back system, wonder at how many miles run and how many a car which would otherwise be many gallons of Keo the Hash has treasured and cleaned each morning, However, the vehicle which now domi consumed over the past 25 years, let us have spent much of their time bondu nates the Hash and it is probably more not forget how many miles of Cyprus bashing. Probably, the most popular embarrassing to be seen driving, is a roads and gallons of petrol have been but unlikely Hash vehicle has proven to Mitsubishi Pajero. Things started quietly consumed in tavellingr to various far be the Mazda 323. Never in the field of in that field with the introduction of the flung RV. Ever since run Number One Hashing has a car so blatantly unsuit Mark 1 Pajero by JRS Personnel but it at the Episkopi runway, there has been able for all terrain use, given such val is clear from the predominantly civilian a constant requirement for Hashers to iant service to so many Hashers. members of the Hash owning them that get from office or home to the RV each their salaries are bloated and excessive. However, all those years ago it started Tuesday. For the ultimate motoring humiliation, As motoring tastes and choices have with an Omnibus. Free of budgetary who would be seen dead driving a Maruti changed over the years, so have the constraints, the services were more than Jeep? For the ultimate in cool attire then variety and type of Hash vehicles altered happy to provide service transport to you will have to turn to the Glanfield also. Indeed, the motor manufacturers convey Hashers to wherever they were BMW fleet. might well have been better advised to required to go, although 25 years ago test their new products on the Cyprus the RV were generally within Episkopi bondu than going to large expense in Garrison itself. Though no photographic driving around Outer Mongolia. Cars evidence exists from that era, I have never designed for off-road use have little doubt that vehicles of the type bounced, crunched, scraped and presently used on the Hash such as squeezed across all manner of terrain Morris Minors and Riley 4/72's were regular visitors to the Hash in 1967- 1974 era. In those balmy days, staff cars were de rigeurfor Hash VIP's like Air Commodore Don Amott, now re duced to throbbing along in a Nissan Patrol. The years have seen many motoring ' eccentrics. Big John Naylor used to ONI tt./1 11 travel to the Hash in a bright violet coloured Morgan 2-seater, while Peter Into what category can we place lvar Brokenshire, so determined to get to Hellberg in his green Morris Minor and the RV, would travel in his bright shiny Mike Cawson in HerrFlick's old Riley 4/ Gozome. This finally came to an end 72, which for those of you who don't when he ventured over a mound too know, is exactly 25 years old also? extensive for the wheel base, thereby What will the smartHasher be driving in causing loud graunching noises. 2017, I wonder? For some, motoring was too tame. Pe- L.l. fPS/L VER JUBILEE 59 , LEATHER ... always in style! Garments JACKETS. SKIRTS, TROUSERS: Ready-made and made-to measure. Finest Nappa leathers. Handbags Superbly (inished, Elegant. Styles to suJt all tastes. f Other Leathergoods I Purses & Wallets, Belts, Travel bags. Shopping bags, Pouffes and many more. Factory & Showroom: lO loannlPoleml Street BUILDING & METAL CONSTRUCTION LTO. P.O.BOX 3152 LIMASSOLTEL051· 936620396· 2333 60 IPSILVER JUBILEE ' ST�.A. LTr> RENT ACAR Furnished flats - Taxi Services PERIOO B NOV. 1st-Mar. 31st TO ALL HASHERS DURING THEIR CAR DAYS OI.YS o.t.YS SILVER JUBILEE WEEK WE ARE I>ROUP MAKEAND TYPE 3-6 7· 14 1� CY£ CY£ CY£ OFFERING OUR B SUZUKI SWIFT t . OO 1.50 1. 00 CHEAPER PERIOD 'B' MAZDA 323SALOON CY£ CY£ CYt WINTER RATES c MrrSUBISHI LANCER 10.00 t.50 t.CO ( INSURANCE NOT INCL.) D SUZUKISE� .� �: CY£ CY£ CY£ E SUZUKI JEEPSAMURAI 14.50 14.00 13.50 STAVROS PANAYIOTOU (Director) P.O.Box 18, Pissouri, Limassol - Cyprus Tel off:(05) 221521, 325585, Fax: (05) 222500 A.O.H.: (05) 353n8 KYRIAKOU BOOKSHOPS I· Best selection of paperbacks Gift books for every interest Dictionaries - Educational STATIONERY For the office, school, home. GREETING CARDS for every occasion PANAYIDES BUILDING, 3 Grivas Dighenis Avenue (near Curium Roundabout), Tel. 368508 Limassol P AREAS ARCADE, Anexartisias - A thinon Comer (near ESEL), Tel. 3751 11 LimassoJ at COLUMBIA PISSOURI BEACHOTEL & The DOME HOTEL, Ayia Napa A wide selection of our books is also available from: YWCA - YMCA - CESSAC - WOOLWORTH and NAAFI shops. H'SILVER JUBILEE 61 FRED HASHER A house/wider arrired lromt• 10 find a L:Orilla had dimhed to the lOp a.f a lr<'C' in lli.1 gardc•n . Naturally lw teh•11honed Gorilfa Cmum/ Sel'tion allll tlu•y .wid they would .l'encl someone m•c•r Pres('llfl\' a litth• man arril'('(i. ll<'t'ompunied !Jy a snwlf do�. am/ l'urrying a large net. ··r ll.won lull'e that �orilla down," Wlid tlw lillie mmt. "How?" a.l'/..ed the lwu,,·elwlder. ''l:.a.w! I}11.11 dimb the tree unci 1ha�e it. Wht• n the �ori//a.fa/1.\ down, my lillie dog · I'I:'IJ hi.�hlv trained animal - rrms up and bite.v him in the halfs. Thi.1 pumly.1e.\ the gorilla and you thmll' the net m·er him. and ll'e pill him in fll)' 1'(11/, '111e Lin/e man then luntrh•d the llm1.1elllllder a n'l'oln•r. faking it. the lmu.\t'holtler said. "So I shoot the gorilla ij anything gm·.,· ll'rong .,.. "God bless you. no!" said the linit• mcm. "\'et:\' l'a/uah/e animals gorillas No. r If tell you - somerime.1 the gonlfa. /oo�in,t: down. 1et•.1 nu! 1·haking tht•tree . .w /r('.11an.1 . shaking it as well. am/ ,·omNinw� I fall down ... "Well?" .Wiid the lwu.wlwldel "In thfll l'll.l'l'. shom the tlog " CYPRUS IS FAMOUS FOR SUN, SEA, FRIENDLINESS AND LOW COST GLASSES IOANNOU OPTICAL HOUSE MAKARIOS AVE. & R. FEREOU. UMASSOL OPPOSITE BARCLAYS BANK THE PERSONAL TOUCH FOR YOUR GOOD LOOKS 62 1-PSILVER JUBILEE Amnowdn�2 Exdtin� l freehold plOt and villa, or villa type apartments from a variety of 6 designs. Prices fi·om £ 31.900 PtssouRI MoNTE·LAONI VILLAGE A devel9prnent of one. rwo and three bedroom apartments and detached vil las. UL the LOp of this picturesque village. offering probably the most spectacular view in Cyprus, from Akroriri Buy to Troodos mountains. Prices a ve:1ih1bfe shortly. VILLAS · APARTMENTS· OFFICES Karaolis Group also offers Offices, Apartments and Villas, in very care fully selected areas of Limassol. the out skirts and the mountains. Ruilt to the highest standards. using the best materi als, our villas and apartments offer com fonable living and our offices are ideal For l'ut1her information lind demited for your offshore activities throughout brochures contact our Head ol77ces. the world. H'SILVER JUBILEE 63 Gentlemen, that reminds me ... A couple were making love when sud A well known 75 year old Hasher went Concerned about bringing up his denly they were interrupted by the to. see Hash Doc and asked for a sperm teenage son withthe same high mor 'phone, and because they were in the test. als to which he himself had always "But you are 75, and your wife is 76", woman ·s flat, she got up to answer it. adhered, the father took the lad for a said Doc, 'What on earth do you want a 'Who was that?' asked her compan- talk with the Vicar. The father eventu sperm test for?" ion as she got back into bed. But our well known Hasher insisted and ally turned the conversation to sex 'Oh, just my husband, ' replied the Doc gave him a bottle and explained to before marriage. women, 'He wanted to tell me he 'IIbe him how to collect the specimen. 'I never slept with my wifebefore we out late because he's playing cards A week later he was back, and put the were married' he said, 'Did you Vicar?' with you and some of the lads.!' empty bottle on the desk in front of Doc. 'I don't know, ' said the Vicar. 'what "I'm not surpnsed", said Doc, "I thought was her maiden name?' you were too old to produce a specimen." The cocky young farm l1and, enjoying his "Listen", said the Hasher, first night off the farm in a month and "I tried it with my ri ght hand, and couldn't determined to giVe an air of sophistication manage, and worldliness, went into the bar of the I tried it with my left hand, and couldn't best hotel in Norwich. Si/Ung at the bar manage, with a drink in front of him, he was attracted My wife tried It wilh her righl hand - no to a curvaceous blondea/ the other end of succ,ess, the bar. Then she tried it with her lett hand - He asked the barman to get a drink for her. again, no luck. but /he barman, being a sympathetic fel She tried it wtth her teeth in, low, whispered to the yokel that the girl and she tried it with her teeth out, was a Lesbian. The country man would But no matter how hard each of us not be put off and he insisted the barman tried ...... pour her the drink...... we still couldn't get the top off that The yokel picked up his drink and saun bottle!" tered up to the girl and sat down beside Black Jocki's first and last anempt her. 'Hello my dear, 'he said, 'What part of at boat building/ Lesbia are you from?' Editor Peter Visagie POPULAR BANK Contributors Sarah Craft, Stewart Glanfield, Lindsay Irvine, WELCOMES Tom McSherry, Dusty Miller, Mike Peters, H.M. FORCES John Quinlan, Peter Robinson, Dave Smith, Chris Upton, Peter Visagie, Mike Waller Welromc 10 Cyprus! 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