march 20, 2020 opinion 23

The Advice Column

What is the definition of

“simp”? Zoya: A simp is a man who foolishly overvalues a woman, according to Urban Dictionary. In my opinion, however, you can never overvalue a woman.

Why is the government cracking down on vaping but not cigarette smoking, even though the latter kills hun- dreds of thousands of people a year?

Zoya: The government is like- ly cracking down on vaping How do you know when someone genuinely likes you when they have weird mood swings?

Zoya: Tip? Either ask them face to face or run.

Why should I be motivated to How did Debbie get into Harvard? go to school as a second semes- ter senior? Zumrut: A $10,000,000 bribe + some family connections ... just kidding ... Zumrut: You should be moti- it's actually a perfect SAT score + 1000 vated because if you don’t then AP classes + 70 leadership positions + your GPA will suffer, leading a 6.0 GPA. ;) colleges to rescind their accep- tances. I hope that helps! 24 A&E March 20, 2020 The Bizzare Issues Surrounding Mr. Peanut

Tracy Leung Evidently, others felt the same. For a Reporter while, the internet was filled with threatening images of peanut butter and video edits of the Whether they are funny, weird, or even infant legume being smashed to pieces with a emotional, there’s no denying the creativity of mallet. Most people thought it was a blatant, Superbowl ads. With an estimated 100 million attempt to cash in on the popularity of Baby Yoda, people watching the Superbowl every year, and it certainly didn’t help that social media corporations are sure to put enormous amounts of accounts and merchandise for the new mascot money and effort into their 30 seconds of spotlight. were created almost immediately after the ad was But this year, among all the movie references and released. celebrity cameos, one brand seemed to receive But on a more serious note, there may much more attention than the rest. be a logical reason for why the company decided An advertisement for Planters Peanuts to take their marketing scheme in this direction. featured actors Wesley Snipes and Matt Walsh The first commercial was originally meant to riding in the “Nutmobile” with Mr. Peanut, when be broadcasted during the third quarter of the the vehicle suddenly swerves off the edge of a cliff. Superbowl. However, due to the death of NBA While clinging to a breaking branch for dear life, legend, Kobe Bryant, Planters had to halt their the peanut mascot decided to save the others. In a promotional content for fear of being insensitive. valiant sacrifice, Mr. Peanut released his grip and According to The Wall Street Journal, “Kraft Heinz fell onto the ruined “Nutmobile” below, before Co. ’s Planters brand apologized for distributing the wreckage burst into a fiery explosion. After a prayer candles for Mr. Peanut as part of its Super week or so, Planters released a new commercial, Bowl campaign about the mascot’s death and said featuring Wesley Snipes’ eulogy at the mascot’s it would consider what’s next after a helicopter funeral. The speech was so moving that the Kool crash killed Kobe Bryant.” Others were also upset Aid Man cried a single teardrop onto Mr. Peanut’s that the death of Terry Jones, creator of Monty grave. Then, in a dramatic turn of events, a ray of Python, seemed to be overshadowed by the death sunlight parted the clouds above and out from the of the fictional mascot. Situations like these ground sprouted a child peanut sporting a top hat. sparked a bit of controversy regarding whether Thus, Baby Nut was born. corporations should be using death, real or not, It’s a strange way to market peanuts, as a way to sell their products. Because of this, the to say the least. While some thought the new rebirth of Mr. Peanut was possibly a way to reverse mascot was cute, the majority had nothing but an the damage of their initial marketing plan. unbridled hatred for it. When asked how she felt But in reality, publicity doesn’t always have to about Baby Nut, Maya Nielsen (12) replied, “I be positive to be successful. Often, it matters not want to light this child on fire and burn him down whether the attention is good or bad, because it is until he’s nothing but an ashen pile.” attention nonetheless.

Image Courtesy of Google March 20, 2020 A&E 25 Happy Trees Painting Night

Miles Eden a space where students can come to express Newport Art department. Along with teaching Editor themselves artistically. Reflecting on events students and other guests how to paint, the happy Bob Ross was an American painter and former success, Club Officer Xiaofu Zhu (10) thinks trees painting night also provides for food those master sergeant in the U.S. Air force who created it “was very accomplishing to do and it was very participating, making the event a welcoming and and hosted the legendary Joy of Painting television nice that we were able to engage the community to well-prepared experience. Carol Zeng (12) says show that helped guide people through the process enjoy art.” you should attend “if you want to relax and watch of oil painting. Although Ross passed in 1995 from The Happy Trees painting night began last a jolly old man paint,” describing it as “artistic lymphoma, his influence has lived on and his year and has become a new tradition for the ASMR.” impact on the art community has grown. The event was very fun for those involved and Newport’s Art in Action club, led by officers everyone ultimately completed a painting of their Carol Zeng (12), Christine Baek (12), Julia own. Though it seemed daunting at first, there Park (12) and Xiaofu Zhu (10), hosted the were many volunteers present to aid those who annual Happy Trees Painting night, where people need help. followed along with a Bob Ross video to learn The event lasted around three and a half hours how to craft beautiful landscape oil paintings. The including the dinner. People of any skill level in art subject of this year’s event was a sunset seascape. are welcome, including relatives of students and The Art in Action club works towards applying teachers. Especially for less experienced artists, artistic skill and passion to help better the this can be a great opportunity to re-connect with community, like providing artwork for local animal painting. Make sure to attend Art in Action Club’s shelters. They describe their mission as creating Happy Trees Painting night next year! Image Courtesy of Google Goop Lab Review

Tracy Leung employees testing out unconventional health tries to appeal to audiences’ emotions by having at Reporter methods. Some of the more ridiculous ones don’t least one Gooper cry in nearly every episode, often Gwenyth Paltrow is most recognizable as come up until the end of the series. In “The Energy for no understandable reason at all. However, Pepper Potts from Iron Man. But these days, her Experience”, an energy healer is invited to explain those who fall for Goop Lab’s claims are likely acting career has been overshadowed by her health how changing the body’s frequency of vibrations the ones who already share similar perspectives. and wellness brand, Goop. Goop showcases a wide can heal physical ailments and emotional trauma. Despite the slick editing, the show gives off a array of products, ranging from shoes to jellyfish He then instructs his patients to lie on a table feeling of unprofessionalism. The scenes in the tanks, all of which are incredibly expensive. One while he waves his hands over their bodies, psychedelic episode where they fly to Jamaica of the most peculiar items is a $27 sprayable mist causing them to awkwardly moan and writhe seem more akin to a rich YouTuber’s travel vlog called Psychic Vampire Repellent. According around. than a documentary. Experts cited by the show to the Goop website, ingredients include sound To be fair, the show actually explores a few vary in terms of reliability and often say things that waves, moonlight, and love, among other things. methods that are backed by science. But even make you question their credentials. The company was founded in 2008, but had only then, the way they’re executed makes them seem The problem with Goop Lab is not that they recently rose to infamy. illegitimate. The first episode focuses on the tackled unconventional concepts, but that they “I hate the concept,” says Xander Carter (12). possible benefits of psychedelics. According to didn’t address opposing arguments or explore “It’s pseudoscience and they’re exploiting people BBC, “small studies have found psychedelics to them from a neutral standpoint. to get money. They’re claiming to cure illnesses show promise in treating mental health disorders”. with no scientific evidence.” However, the Goopers don’t undergo a clinical Aside from her strange products, Paltrow trial as advised by scientists. Instead, they simply is also known to promote questionable health drank some mushroom tea, laid on the floor, and practices, such as bee-venom therapy, which eventually began sobbing uncontrollably. Although caused a woman’s death in 2018. With all this they were supervised by what Goop claims to be controversy surrounding the actress, it’s not professional therapists, one can’t help doubting surprising that the Netflix series, Goop Lab, their expertise when they say things like, “This is a received enormous backlash when it was first sacrament so that we can be with the spirit of the announced in January. mushroom.” “I saw the trailer,” says Carter. “I think it’s Ultimately, Goop Lab does indeed have the disgusting that they have several lawsuits against potential to do harm. The disclaimer states that their dangerous products, but the trailer advertises the series is only meant to entertain and inform, it as exciting.” but all the topics are presented from a very one- Maria Hoffman (12)agrees that Goop sided viewpoint. In the episode “Cold Comfort”, promotes pseudoscience and does not plan on the Goopers try the Wim Hof method of using watching the show. But when asked whether she meditation and breathing exercises to sustain thinks Goop Lab will be harmful, she replies, freezing temperatures. Although these techniques “Not necessarily. Only if they portray the medical have worked for certain people, The Atlantic states products they’re selling as cures for dangerous that “There have been reported deaths among diseases.” practitioners of the method while swimming.” Yet, However, Goop Lab rarely promotes their Goop Lab fails to mention any of the four fatalities own merchandise. Rather, it’s about the Goop attributed to Wim Hof’s techniques. The show also

Image Courtesy of Google 26 A&E March 20, 2020 King Krule Album Review

ddFMiles Eden album actually works to its benefit, as the tracks listless attitude of the second half of the album Editor never seem to overstay their welcome. Though drifts into psychedelia in tracks like the single there are those that believe the album did not think “Alone”, “Omen 3” which boasts some of the best it lived up to the last album, like Mike Pinpin songwriting on the album along with alien textures (12) who says “while King Krule’s previous album made by synths and copious reverb. was a brilliant showcase of his malicious music style, ‘Man Alive!’ is unfortunately diluted with anguish and despair.” Although he decides to omit the unnerving experimental textures that layered The Ooz, Marshall effectively crafts a succinct and smooth experience that contrasts with the erratic nature of his past release. Jazz Monroe of Pitchfork writes in his review of the album that “Marshall has a skill for collage that subtly points you beyond the Archy Marshall, known by his stage name King song” and that the album “dips in and out of dream Krule released his new album Man Alive! On scenes, and hinges on a dramatic narrative lurch.” February 21, following up on his last full-length Tracks like “Supermarché” and “Stoned release from 2017, The Ooz. Despite The Ooz’s Again” exemplify the rough punk sound that form near universal and fervent acclaim at the time of the early mood of the album, as they are led by its release, as for example it received a 9.0 Best heavy guitars and Marshall’s most incensed vocal New Music score from music journal Pitchfork, performances. “Stoned Again” is the clear standout the follow up Man Alive! arguably reaches even and most successful of the tracks made with greater heights. this darker tone through its heavy baseline and The album is a melting pot of genres, as it enthralling energy. starts of with claustrophobic punk tracks and After the track “Comet Face”, the album slowly and subtly transforms into atmospheric and begins to turn towards a more atmospheric ambient jazz fusion by the end of the surprisingly sound. The tempo of the tracks slow, and more brief 42-minute runtime. The shorter nature of this saxophones and synths begin to wander their way into the sonic landscape of the album. The Green Day Hates Swedish Songwriters!

dKeven Goh The single “Oh Yeah!”, with its fake chorus Editor background repeating the phrase “oh yeah!” over and over for the duration of the song, is a East Bay musical trio Green Day have blatant attempt on Green Day’s part of writing always hated being called a pop band. Billie a chant-able sports-stadium anthem. “It’s like Joe Armstrong, the band’s lead guitarist, once they tried to write ‘We Will Rock You’ by Queen, famously tweeted: “I hate the phrase ‘pop except it’s bad.” said Mikayla Lopez (12). punk’... either you’re punk, or you’re not”. On many songs, lead singer Armstrong trades Armstrong then went on to say, “I come from a his iconic sneering vocals for a bizarre falsetto, scene where every band was different from the which is unsettling and throws off many of the others; it was all so diverse”. For such a self- songs. declared nonconformist punk band, one might It seems that Green Day is insecure about be surprised to know that these are the same their status as a pop band, using Father of All guys who allowed their 2004 album American as an attempt to return to their roots as a goofy Idiot to be made into a Broadway musical, and punk group from California. However, it comes then shut down their own online forum when off as forced, and is ultimately unsuccessful fans complained. In 2020, Green Day is back at capturing the band’s original feel. Yet, the with their 13th studio album, Father of All. trio have seen themselves through this sort Green Day seems to be deliberately of criticism before. The band’s 90s hit “Good looking for controversy. For one, the full title of Riddance (Time of Your Life)” was lambasted Father of All is Father of All Mother[expletive] by fans, and yet went on to become one of the ers. Also making headlines on rock magazines most overplayed pop radio hits of that decade, such as NME or Rolling Stone was the band’s even being listed by Rolling Stone as one of the loud and vaguely racist advertising, consisting “20 best graduation songs of all time”. of a billboard featuring slogans such as “no Interestingly, pop-punk seems to be Swedish songwriters” and “no trap beats”. having a moment in the current music scene. Meanwhile, other phrases on the billboard such The Hella Mega Tour, a joint tour between Green as “100% pure uncut rock” make Green Day Day, Fall Out Boy, and Weezer is already sold sound more like pretentious boomers than the out in several states and is coming to Seattle’s musical trailblazers they make themselves out T-Mobile stadium this July. Millenials Rejoice. to be. “Is Green Day just a dad rock band now?” remarked Ishika Devgan (10). Green Day’s controversial billboard Father of All is short, fast, and boring. March 20, 2020 A&E 27

MOVIE REVIEWS

1917 Movie Review ddFGarrett McAvoy 9/10 Reporter

1917, directed by Sam Mendes, opened in theaters on Christmas 2019, going on to win three Oscars and two Golden Globe awards. The film takes place in (go figure) the year 1917, in the midst of World War I. Following two young British soldiers stationed in France, Lance Corporal Blake (Dean-Charles Chapman) and Lance Corporal Schofield (George MacKay), the single, continuous shot camerawork takes the audience through the brutal trials of war. The two soldiers are sent to deliver an urgent message to another far away battalion before morning but must pass through an already war torn landscape crawling with German soldiers. With such a simple plot, the true stars of the film are ready to shine: the set design and cinematography. From the disgusting trenches to the made it seem more interesting and alive.” the continuous shot effect “helped tell the story endless mortar pocked hellscapes, there is a heavy, Though the film offers an immersive and and showed that it was [the soldier’s] journey.” drab feeling that permeates this film. This feeling entertaining experience for many, some may see To most audiences, the film provides works to sink the audience into the soldiers’ Mendes’ approach as clinical and unfitting for the a glimpse into what soldiers in World War I mindset. With the seamless linkage between shots, subject matter of the film. Manohla Dargis of The experienced. Putting the audience in someone the camera brings viewers alongside the soldiers New York Times writes that Mendes’ direction else’s shoes is something all films aspire to do, and on their journey. In moments of intense turmoil turns the “most catastrophic episodes in modern this film is incredibly successful at it. By doing or in gasps of relief, the audience is enticed to times into an exercise in preening showmanship,” this, Sam Mendes cemented 1917 as one of the best empathize deeply with the soldiers, greatly in suggesting that the technical excellence detracts movies of 2019. part to the convincing cinematography. Student from the gritty subject matter. Mr. Hamada, the Sonanshi Bhatia (9) said “the one shot effect teacher for DVA and NTV, disagreed, saying that

Eternal Atake the genre. Fans have been waiting becomes an autotune crooner two years for this album as its backed by a faint choir, Garrett McAvoy 6.5/10 drifted through label limbo, and adding heartbreak into his Reporter now Uzi has to prove that it was lyrical rotation on the album.

worth the wait. Student Will Diedrich’s When the album was first (9) favorite song from this Releasing his first album since 2017’s Luv Is announced in 2018, the cover section is “Prices” due to Rage 2, rapper Lil Uzi Vert unexpectedly delivered art released featured the Eternal the fact “the production is the long awaited Eternal Atake in March 2020. Atake moniker inscribed into really good and the hook is Uzi exploded onto the scene just a few years ago the logo of the “Heaven’s Gate” catchy.”Following two very with hit singles like “XO Tour Llif3” and features religious UFO cult. Though the stylistically unique sections, on songs like Migos’ “Bad and Boujee,” proving his album art has since been replaced, Eternal Atake more or less hand at creating infectious and influential hip hop the eerie, space age feeling loses its cohesion in the final but also bringing a persona that is utterly unique to associated with the preliminary Google Images third. The tracks “Futsal art has been transplanted into skits Shuffle” and “That Way”, though dubbed “bonus throughout the album. tracks,” only serve to dilute any semblance of Despite the occasionally repetitive thematic consistency at the end of the track listing. lyrics, the production keeps it fresh with For music that feels so present, two creative sampling, bouncy synth lines, and years is a long time to wait. Some fans were hard hitting drums. There is a surprising disappointed, such as student Cassidy Wong (9). amount of stylistic variance with the Wong felt that she “waited two years for something album split into three sections. Uzi opens that didn’t live up to the hype.” It’s clear that Lil with fast, hard hitting tracks like “Lo Uzi Vert and his team of producers aimed high Mein” and “Silly Watch” which feature with this collection of songs, and though they don’t more technical flows, an opportunity for quite meet the soaring expectations built up over the Philadelphia rapper to flex his chops. the years, Eternal Atake is still Uzi’s best album On the next six tracks, Uzi suddenly to date. 28 A&E March 20, 2020 Jessica LaBrache Artist Feature

ddMichael Peck positively. Her artwork is phenomenal and her portfolio and studying at the GW fine arts studio. Editor commitment to community engagement and Along with a new commitment, LaBrache noticed With work showcased at the Seattle Art inclusivity is inspiring. Jessica is kind, goofy, holds her inspirations shift “from Tumblr and fan art Museum, Tacoma Art Museum, Folklife, the me and others accountable, always leads with to realism, still life, and portraiture. Thinking Washington State Fair, and the Mercer Island empathy, and honestly is just a kickass human.” back to this transition, LaBrache remembers Convention Center, Jessica LaBrache stands When asked about her working environment, “spending months staring at the same still life.” out as an extremely dedicated and gifted artist LaBrache revealed that one of her secrets is doing While intense, this new regimen proved to be at Newport. On top of her outstanding artwork, art “while watching Dr. Phil and listening to crime quite rewarding. While working on her portfolio, LaBrache is a member of SAM’s Teen Arts Group: shows.” As curious as her multitasking tendencies LaBrache also studies art history at the Seattle Art a group of young artists and curators who plan are, what captivates me most about LaBrache is Museum and at Newport with Mr. Prufer. When exhibits and events. As a senior looking forward, her style as an artist. LaBrache identifies her most asked about some of her favorite art, LaBrache Jessica hopes to attend art school to study studio of her art as surrealism: she incorporates natural mentioned Olympia by Manet, Jenny Saville, and art and art history, pursuing a career as an artist elements and organizes them in an abstract way. exhibits at SAM such as Peacock in the Desert and and curator. LaBrache also stresses political and social issues Flesh and Blood. LaBrache is very invested in her job in the as the focus on her artwork and uses her Teen Arts Group. This year she has had a key role art as a platform for critical commentary. in “finding and organizing artwork [and] taking In her recent artwork, LaBrache addressed on all the logistical challenges of curating.” This the Australia wildfires, climate change, years Teen Arts Group exhibit, On the Verge, is and the LGBT community. When asked on display at the Seattle Art Museum until March about her messages, LaBrache expressed 25th. LaBrache talked me through the lengthy how much she appreciates the impact of process, which included reaching out to artists for her art. “Having [my work] in the public submissions and holding meetings to select and eye really puts my voice out there. When organize the pieces. In the end, opening night was I see people look closely at my art, I see a success and hundreds of people attended. Teen my impact, how I can stimulate thinking Arts Group also hosts their annual Teen Night Out. and analyzing and make viewers of my art Held on May 1st, teens get free access to galleries conscious.” as well as food, music, performances from local Jessica LaBrache has been passionate artists and DJ’s, and art activities. When asked about art for many years; however, it was about Jessica LaBrache, Rayna Mathis, Educator not until her Sophomore year that she for Teen Programs said “Jessica is one of the most became set on art school and a career passionate and dedicated people I know and have as an artist and curator. After getting worked with! She is a natural leader, thoughtful, her family on the same page, she took insightful, and challenges those around her on a rigorous work routine, building her Image courtesy of Jessica LaBrache

Umbrella Academy Comic

ddZoya Siddiqui of the Academy were subject to various forms As of February 19th, Netflix has teased Reporter of abuse. Sir Hargreeves is unequivocally a second season of the show, which will With the rise of the mass consumption represented as delusional and emotionally presumably be released in late 2020. of superhero films, it is no surprise that detached, and he is seen monitoring the Netflix’s The Umbrella Academy became one children with surveillance cameras at all of the platform’s most successful series in times, insisting on military-style training, 2019. Adapted from a graphic novel series of and referring to them by numbers instead of the same name by Gerard Way and Gabriel Ba, names as though they were lab rats. The effects the show is focused on a dysfunctional family of such abuse manifested later in their adult of superheroes and explores the concepts of lives as mechanisms such as addiction and emotional abuse, neglect, and the ways in vigilantism. which people cope with trauma. “Everyone responds to their damaged The prologue is set in 1989, when an upbringing in different ways,” says Connor eccentric billionaire, Sir Reginald Hargreeves, Lindsey (12), “The Umbrella Academy adopts seven children with superhuman doesn’t trivialize the effects that abuse has on abilities and turns them into a crime fighting people, and it certainly doesn’t shy away from team called the Umbrella Academy. The portraying the family as dysfunctional.” storyline officially starts as a time jump into their adulthood, when the siblings, who had The show strikes a chord with many grown apart, are forced back together by Sir because of its balance of action, humour, and Reginald’s death. The night of the funeral, emotional complexity. When asked about they learn that the apocalypse will arrive in her thoughts regarding the show, Veronica eight days and that they must band together to Guerra (12) says “I think it’s really unique prevent it. because right now, there are a whole lot of Throughout the show, snippets of their dystopian, romance, and supernatural type childhood are shown through flashbacks, and shows out there and the Umbrella Academy is it is immediately understood that the members just completely different.” Google Images