Opinion the Advice Column
Total Page：16
File Type：pdf, Size：1020Kb
march 20, 2020 opinion 23 The Advice Column What is the definition of “simp”? Zoya: A simp is a man who foolishly overvalues a woman, according to Urban Dictionary. In my opinion, however, you can never overvalue a woman. Why is the government cracking down on vaping but not cigarette smoking, even though the latter kills hun- dreds of thousands of people a year? Zoya: The government is like- ly cracking down on vaping How do you know when someone genuinely likes you when they have weird mood swings? Zoya: Tip? Either ask them face to face or run. Why should I be motivated to How did Debbie get into Harvard? go to school as a second semes- ter senior? Zumrut: A $10,000,000 bribe + some family connections ... just kidding ... Zumrut: You should be moti- it's actually a perfect SAT score + 1000 vated because if you don’t then AP classes + 70 leadership positions + your GPA will suffer, leading a 6.0 GPA. ;) colleges to rescind their accep- tances. I hope that helps! 24 A&E March 20, 2020 The Bizzare Issues Surrounding Mr. Peanut Tracy Leung Evidently, others felt the same. For a Reporter while, the internet was filled with threatening images of peanut butter and video edits of the Whether they are funny, weird, or even infant legume being smashed to pieces with a emotional, there’s no denying the creativity of mallet. Most people thought it was a blatant, Superbowl ads. With an estimated 100 million attempt to cash in on the popularity of Baby Yoda, people watching the Superbowl every year, and it certainly didn’t help that social media corporations are sure to put enormous amounts of accounts and merchandise for the new mascot money and effort into their 30 seconds of spotlight. were created almost immediately after the ad was But this year, among all the movie references and released. celebrity cameos, one brand seemed to receive But on a more serious note, there may much more attention than the rest. be a logical reason for why the company decided An advertisement for Planters Peanuts to take their marketing scheme in this direction. featured actors Wesley Snipes and Matt Walsh The first commercial was originally meant to riding in the “Nutmobile” with Mr. Peanut, when be broadcasted during the third quarter of the the vehicle suddenly swerves off the edge of a cliff. Superbowl. However, due to the death of NBA While clinging to a breaking branch for dear life, legend, Kobe Bryant, Planters had to halt their the peanut mascot decided to save the others. In a promotional content for fear of being insensitive. valiant sacrifice, Mr. Peanut released his grip and According to The Wall Street Journal, “Kraft Heinz fell onto the ruined “Nutmobile” below, before Co. ’s Planters brand apologized for distributing the wreckage burst into a fiery explosion. After a prayer candles for Mr. Peanut as part of its Super week or so, Planters released a new commercial, Bowl campaign about the mascot’s death and said featuring Wesley Snipes’ eulogy at the mascot’s it would consider what’s next after a helicopter funeral. The speech was so moving that the Kool crash killed Kobe Bryant.” Others were also upset Aid Man cried a single teardrop onto Mr. Peanut’s that the death of Terry Jones, creator of Monty grave. Then, in a dramatic turn of events, a ray of Python, seemed to be overshadowed by the death sunlight parted the clouds above and out from the of the fictional mascot. Situations like these ground sprouted a child peanut sporting a top hat. sparked a bit of controversy regarding whether Thus, Baby Nut was born. corporations should be using death, real or not, It’s a strange way to market peanuts, as a way to sell their products. Because of this, the to say the least. While some thought the new rebirth of Mr. Peanut was possibly a way to reverse mascot was cute, the majority had nothing but an the damage of their initial marketing plan. unbridled hatred for it. When asked how she felt But in reality, publicity doesn’t always have to about Baby Nut, Maya Nielsen (12) replied, “I be positive to be successful. Often, it matters not want to light this child on fire and burn him down whether the attention is good or bad, because it is until he’s nothing but an ashen pile.” attention nonetheless. Image Courtesy of Google March 20, 2020 A&E 25 Happy Trees Painting Night Miles Eden a space where students can come to express Newport Art department. Along with teaching Editor themselves artistically. Reflecting on events students and other guests how to paint, the happy Bob Ross was an American painter and former success, Club Officer Xiaofu Zhu (10) thinks trees painting night also provides for food those master sergeant in the U.S. Air force who created it “was very accomplishing to do and it was very participating, making the event a welcoming and and hosted the legendary Joy of Painting television nice that we were able to engage the community to well-prepared experience. Carol Zeng (12) says show that helped guide people through the process enjoy art.” you should attend “if you want to relax and watch of oil painting. Although Ross passed in 1995 from The Happy Trees painting night began last a jolly old man paint,” describing it as “artistic lymphoma, his influence has lived on and his year and has become a new tradition for the ASMR.” impact on the art community has grown. The event was very fun for those involved and Newport’s Art in Action club, led by officers everyone ultimately completed a painting of their Carol Zeng (12), Christine Baek (12), Julia own. Though it seemed daunting at first, there Park (12) and Xiaofu Zhu (10), hosted the were many volunteers present to aid those who annual Happy Trees Painting night, where people need help. followed along with a Bob Ross video to learn The event lasted around three and a half hours how to craft beautiful landscape oil paintings. The including the dinner. People of any skill level in art subject of this year’s event was a sunset seascape. are welcome, including relatives of students and The Art in Action club works towards applying teachers. Especially for less experienced artists, artistic skill and passion to help better the this can be a great opportunity to re-connect with community, like providing artwork for local animal painting. Make sure to attend Art in Action Club’s shelters. They describe their mission as creating Happy Trees Painting night next year! Image Courtesy of Google Goop Lab Review Tracy Leung employees testing out unconventional health tries to appeal to audiences’ emotions by having at Reporter methods. Some of the more ridiculous ones don’t least one Gooper cry in nearly every episode, often Gwenyth Paltrow is most recognizable as come up until the end of the series. In “The Energy for no understandable reason at all. However, Pepper Potts from Iron Man. But these days, her Experience”, an energy healer is invited to explain those who fall for Goop Lab’s claims are likely acting career has been overshadowed by her health how changing the body’s frequency of vibrations the ones who already share similar perspectives. and wellness brand, Goop. Goop showcases a wide can heal physical ailments and emotional trauma. Despite the slick editing, the show gives off a array of products, ranging from shoes to jellyfish He then instructs his patients to lie on a table feeling of unprofessionalism. The scenes in the tanks, all of which are incredibly expensive. One while he waves his hands over their bodies, psychedelic episode where they fly to Jamaica of the most peculiar items is a $27 sprayable mist causing them to awkwardly moan and writhe seem more akin to a rich YouTuber’s travel vlog called Psychic Vampire Repellent. According around. than a documentary. Experts cited by the show to the Goop website, ingredients include sound To be fair, the show actually explores a few vary in terms of reliability and often say things that waves, moonlight, and love, among other things. methods that are backed by science. But even make you question their credentials. The company was founded in 2008, but had only then, the way they’re executed makes them seem The problem with Goop Lab is not that they recently rose to infamy. illegitimate. The first episode focuses on the tackled unconventional concepts, but that they “I hate the concept,” says Xander Carter (12). possible benefits of psychedelics. According to didn’t address opposing arguments or explore “It’s pseudoscience and they’re exploiting people BBC, “small studies have found psychedelics to them from a neutral standpoint. to get money. They’re claiming to cure illnesses show promise in treating mental health disorders”. with no scientific evidence.” However, the Goopers don’t undergo a clinical Aside from her strange products, Paltrow trial as advised by scientists. Instead, they simply is also known to promote questionable health drank some mushroom tea, laid on the floor, and practices, such as bee-venom therapy, which eventually began sobbing uncontrollably. Although caused a woman’s death in 2018. With all this they were supervised by what Goop claims to be controversy surrounding the actress, it’s not professional therapists, one can’t help doubting surprising that the Netflix series, Goop Lab, their expertise when they say things like, “This is a received enormous backlash when it was first sacrament so that we can be with the spirit of the announced in January.