B NDINGS Vol. 37 No. 1 A Publication of New Ways Ministry Fall-Winter 2017 Bishop calls homosexuality ‘gift from God,’ seeks to end ‘prejudices that kill’ By Inés San Martín Prejudice, he said, is a “concept Cruxnow.com before an experience,” and it’s what August 9, 2017 blinded generations to , and what blinds Europe today to the “drama of A Brazilian bishop said July 30 that refugees.” homosexuality is a “gift from God.” Cruz, appointed bishop by Seeing the reaction his homily generated, Francis in 2014, after he served in some of Bishop Antônio Carlos Cruz Santos of Brazil’s most infamous favelas, or slums, Caicó then released a statement saying said the Argentine pontiff is sometimes that his only scope was to “save lives,” accused by “some who want to be more after learning about the high statistics of Roman than the pope,” of wanting to suicide among the LGBT community. water down the Church’s teaching, “they “If it is not a choice, if it is not a say we’re selling ourselves, that he’s disease, in the perspective of faith it can selling the doctrine for something cheap. only be a gift,” the bishop of Caicó in the “In truth, what wants is Rio Grande do Norte state said during his to make mercy the starting point of homily at a Mass closing the feast of Catholic doctrine,” he said. “And mercy, Santana de Caicó, always marked on the people, is not cheap: Mercy is very Sunday following the feast of Sts. Joachim expensive. Christ paid a high price for and Anne. mercy.” “The gospel par excellence is the Cruz also quoted Francis’s famous gospel of inclusion,” said the bishop. “The line “If someone is and is searching gospel is a narrow door, yes, it is a for the Lord and has good will, then who demanding love, but it is a door that is am I to judge him?” adding, just as the always open. pope did at the time, on the flight back “When you look at homosexuality, from Rio de Janeiro in 2013, that the Bishop Antônio Carlos Cruz Santos you cannot say it’s an option,” Cruz said, Catechism of the says adding that a choice has to be made freely, that gay people are not to be marginalized video on YouTube, was praised by challenging the teachings of the while sexual orientation is something a from society. some and criticized by many others, Catechism. Furthermore, he quotes person discovers “one day.” “It’d be good for orthodox who even call his words a heresy and point 2358 of the Catechism of the However, he said, a person can chose [Catholics] to read the Catechism of demanded the Vatican to get involved. Catholic Church. how to live his or her sexual orientation, the Catholic Church.” Seeing the many reactions, Cruz “The number of men and women “in a dignified, ethical way, or in a The also quoted Francis’s released a statement on the diocesan who have deep-seated homosexual promiscuous one. But promiscuity can be document on the family, Amoris website on Sunday, a week after his tendencies is not negligible,” the lived in any of the orientations.” Laetitia, in which the pope talks about homily. In it, the bishop stood by his section he quoted in full says. “This The bishop then said that “accompanying, discernment and remarks, saying that his goal was to inclination, which is objectively homosexuality hasn’t been considered as a welcoming” families in irregular “save lives, contributing so that we disordered, constitutes for most of disease by the World Health Organization unions, acknowledging that even can overcome the prejudices that kill.” them a trial. They must be accepted since the 1990s, and given this, and the though it was addressed to divorced The bishop said that he did not with respect, compassion, and fact that a person doesn’t choose to be and civilly remarried Catholics, it want to induce anyone to make a sensitivity. Every sign of unjust gay, same-sex attraction can only be “a could apply to gay people too. mistake, but that he followed the discrimination in their regard should gift from God. It’s given by God. But The bishop began his homily guidelines of the church and of be avoided. These persons are called to perhaps our prejudices do not get the gift talking about a radio interview that Francis. fulfill God’s will in their lives and, if of God.” really affected him. The host was “As Pope Francis told us many they are Christians, to unite to the During his homily, Cruz said that talking about a professor who did his times, people already know by heart sacrifice of the Lord’s Cross the when slavery was accepted, black people thesis on the prevalence of suicide the doctrine of the Church about difficulties they may encounter from weren’t considered human, “they said we among transvestites and transsexuals. abortion, divorce and homosexual their condition.” black people didn’t have a soul,” because On hearing this report, he said, he acts,” Cruz wrote. “He asks us not to Following this statement, Cruz of “prejudices.” began to think about “so many be obsessed with sin, increasing the said his reflection as a pastor moved “Just as we were able to leap, in the brothers and sisters with a homosexual wounds of these people, and insists by the “weaknesses of his flock, wisdom of the Gospel, and overcome orientation who feel misunderstood that the doors of the church are open to without wanting to minimize the slavery, is it not the time for us to leap, and unloved by us, who are Church, by welcome, instruct, discern, love in doctrinal and moral dimensions that from a perspective of faith, and overcome their families, by their society and order to bring salvation to all without the subject matter involves, my prejudices against our brothers who even by themselves, as it was in the exception.” intention is to save lives, helping to experience same-sex attraction?” the days of slavery.” The bishop also wrote that his overcome prejudices that kill and enter bishop asked. The bishop’s homily, available in intention on addressing the issue was into the dynamic of God’s mercy that merely pastoral, and that he’s not respects, rescues and saves people.”  National Catholic Reporter Editorial: Time for dialogue on sexual ethics By Editorial Staff church? Without a change in the church’s of the sexual act. Therefore, according to conception impossible, such as use of The National Catholic Reporter teaching on sex and sexuality, can LGBT the catechism, all sex acts between contraceptives, is “intrinsically August 9, 2017 people ever hope to be treated with equal- married couples must be “ordered per se evil” (2370). The catechism also con- ity and justice by the hierarchy? to the procreation of human life” (2366). demns masturbation as an “intrinsically The Catholic community should There is good precedent for This “procreative norm” dates back more and gravely disordered action” because thank Jesuit Fr. James Martin for writ- development of the than 1,500 years to “the deliberate use of the sexual , ing Building a Bridge: How the Catholic church’s sexual the time of for whatever reason, outside of marriage Church and the LGBT Community Can ethics, particularly Augustine, who is essentially contrary to its pur- Enter into a Relationship of Respect, in the last 50 years. developed the idea pose” (2352). Compassion, and Sensitivity. Many For centuries, Cath- in response to his As a case in point, see Springfield, , gay, bisexual and olic doctrine insist- belief in the sinful, Illinois, Bishop Thomas Paprocki’s list of Catholics have spent years on the margins ed that pro-creation uncontrollable Catholics he suggests should not present of our community inviting such dialogue. was the sole justi- nature of sexual themselves for holy Communion. This book cracks open a new door to opp- fication for sexual arousal. The institutional church’s vocal ortunities to ask important questions about acts and that sexual- Today, the objections to same-sex marriage often the inclusion of LGBT Catholics in the ity was funda- procreative norm is mask the fact that church teaching is church, and those opportunities should be mentally disor- one of the funda- fundamentally opposed to sexual acts that seized. dered. These teach- mental reasons the a majority of human beings participate in. Martin’s book exhorts church leaders ings were question- church remains The church condemns any sex acts — and LGBT Catholics to come together in ed and modified in opposed to same- including those engaged in by married dialogue. Using the words of the the mid- sex relationships. couples — that do not respect the procreat Catechism of the Catholic Church, he 20th century in the But, in reality, this -ive norm. Therefore, in reality, few calls both sides to treat one another with documents of the doctrine has far- Catholics ever live up to the church’s “respect, compassion, and sensitivity.” Second Vatican reaching conse- moral norms governing sexual activity. This is good advice, and those in the hier- Council and Pope quences for all As stark as these teachings are, other archy who have made such outreach — Paul VI’s Humanae Vitae (“On Catholics, regardless of sexual orientation issues related to sexual relationships Cardinal Joseph Tobin of Newark, New Human Life”). Today, the church or gender identity. remain unclear and underdeveloped, such Jersey, and Bishop Patrick McGrath of recognizes that sex between a man and a Much is often made about the as the church’s positions on divorce and San Jose, , to name just two — woman within the bond of sacramental church’s teaching that same-sex rela-tions remarriage, the single life and celibacy. need our support. marriage can be a source of joy and are “intrinsic-ally disordered.” But equally If bishops like Paprocki were more Inescapable in this bridge-building pleasure in both body and spirit. harsh language is used for other sexual vocal about their opposition to mastur- project, however, are deeper questions But the doctrine also maintains that transgressions of the church’s procreative bation, in vitro fertilization or vasectomies that cannot go unexamined. Can dialogue there is an indissoluble connection be- norm. For example, the catechism be enough to achieve a truly inclusive tween the procreative and unitive meaning declares that every action used to render (Continued on page 6) Page 2 BONDINGS Vol. 37, No. 1 B NDINGS It’s Time to Canonize Fr. Mychal Judge: Seeking Personal Testimony Fall-Winter 2017 Vol. 37, No. 1

Francis DeBernardo, Editor By Francis DeBernardo life’ would have to meet the following criteria: Bondings 2.0 Free and willing offer of one’s life and a heroic Board of Directors www.NewWaysMinistry.org/blog acceptance, out of love, of a certain and early death; the Jeannine Gramick, SL, Chair July 17, 2017 heroic act of charity and the premature death are Ryan Sattler connected. The time has come to begin the initial research to Evidence of having lived out the Christian virtues — Board of Advisors make Franciscan Fr. Mychal Judge, OFM, a canonized at least in an ordinary, and not necessarily heroic, way — Dr. Jerry Fath in the Catholic Church. And we need the help of before having offered one’s life to others and until one’s people like you to spread the word about such a possibility death. Cornelius Hubbuch, CFX so that we can gather Evidence of a reputation for Rev. James Kiesel evidence about Fr. Judge’s holiness, at least after death. Anna Koop, SL life and ministry. A miracle attributed to the Anne Marie Miller, RSM On September 11, candidate’s intercession is Claire Pluecker 2001, Fr. Judge, who was needed for beatification.” Cristina Traina a chaplain for the New Last week, I spoke with York City Fire Depart- Fr. Luis Fernando Escalante, Staff ment, rushed into the an Argentinian priest living in Francis DeBernardo, Executive Director World Trade Center Rome, who serves as a Matthew Myers, Associate Director building with other first postulator for the Vatican’s Robert Shine, Associate Director responders, after terrorists Congregation for ’ had flown planes into the Causes. Fr. Escalante said Co-Founders skyscraper towers. As a that Fr. Judge clearly fits this Sr. Jeannine Gramick, SL result of his sacrifice, he new category of a heroic died, and is now often giver of one’s own life. Rev. Robert Nugent, SDS referred to as “Victim In order to propose that Number One” of that Fr. Judge be investigated by Bondings is a seasonal publication designed tragic day which wit- the Congregation to be to keep our subscribers informed of issues nessed the deaths of close considered for , that pertain to LGBT people to 3,000 people, with over an immense amount of and the Catholic Church. 6,000 more injured. research first must be He was also known as done. What is needed Founded in 1977, New Ways Ministry an unofficial chaplain in are first-hand accounts from is an educational and bridge-building the gay community, people who knew Fr. Judge ministry of reconciliation between the Cath- providing pastoral care personally or who had olic LGBT community and support wherever and any correspondence with him and the institutional structures whenever he could. He or have other significant in the Roman Catholic Church. ministered, selflessly, too, documents that will give a with HIV/AIDS patients clearer, more detailed picture and with people suffering New Ways Ministry seeks to eradicate Fr. Mychal Judge, OFM of his life, spirituality, and from addictions. ministry. Extremely important prevalent myths and stereotypes Pope Francis paved the about homosexuality and gender identity is any information regarding a way for Fr. Judge to be considered for canonization this possible miracle attributed to Fr. Judge’s intercession. and supports civil rights for LGBT persons past week when he added a new possible pathway to Fr. Escalante emphasized that this new category for in society. sainthood: the heroic giving of one’s life for others. canonization requires only an ordinary living out of The pope issued a motu propio on July 11th Christian virtues, not an extraordinary effort. So, any entitled “Maiorem hac dilectionem.” The Latin title is stories that you or your contacts may have about Fr. Judge, New Ways Ministry derived from St. John’s Gospel: “No one has greater love even if they are seemingly ordinary, are needed. 4012 29th Street than this, to lay down one’s life for one’s friends” (John This opportunity depends on YOU! The only way that Mount Rainier, Maryland 20712 15:13). The National Catholic Reporter explained why this we can make Fr. Judge’s canonization a reality is through a (301) 277-5674 development is significant: mass effort to find people who knew Fr. Judge. People [email protected] “Archbishop Marcello Bartolucci, Secretary of the who have been involved in Catholic LGBT activities are NewWaysMinistry.org Vatican Congregation for Saints’ Causes, said the addition very likely to have met him or perhaps to have prayed to is meant ‘to promote heroic Christian testimony, (that has him for a miracle. That is why we are asking you to share been) up to now without a specific process, precisely this information. Of course, those who knew Fr. Judge because it did not completely fit within the case of from other activities–his work, his NYC Fire martyrdom or heroic virtues.’ Department chaplaincy, his ministry to HIV/AIDS patients TO SUBSCRIBE “For centuries, consideration for the sainthood process and addicts–are also sought. required that a Servant of God heroically lived a life of An request for the Cause of Fr. Judge’s COMPLETE AND RETURN THE FORM Christian virtues or had been martyred for the faith. The canonization can only be submitted after a great deal of this BELOW third, less common way, is called an equivalent or initial research is gathered. This may take many months, equipollent canonization: when there is evidence of strong perhaps even a year or more. Only through a mass effort to devotion among the faithful to a holy man or woman, the build a network of individuals and organizations who are Enclosed is: pope can waive a lengthy formal canonical investigation searching for the necessary evidence and information will and can authorize their veneration as saints. we be able to get to even the first step of the canonization _____ $25.00 in the US or Canada “While these three roads to sainthood remain process. unchanged, they were not adequate ‘for interpreting all For the sake of this heroic priest who literally gave his _____ $35.00 outside US or Canada possible cases’ of holiness, the wrote in the life for others, please spread the word!  Vatican newspaper, L’Osservatore Romano, July 11. _____ I wish to receive Bondings, “According to the apostolic letter, any causes for but cannot donate at this time. beatification according to the new pathway of ‘offering of

Name ______

Address ______Here is what you can do to aid

City ______the canonization effort for Fr. Mychal Judge, OFM:

State ______

DayPhone ______ Share the above information about Fr. Judge with your social media, email, and personal contacts. Ask them to share this information with others by the same means. We need this to go Night Phone ______viral to find people who knew Fr. Judge, who feel they have experienced his intercession in a possible miracle, or simply want to support and help the preliminaries of his Cause. Cell Phone ______ Refer anyone who has first-hand information about Fr. Judge to contact New Ways Ministry by email ([email protected]), phone (301-277-5674), or postal mail (4012 29th Street, Email ______Mount Rainier, Maryland 20712).  Persons who have testimony about Fr. Judge need only make an initial contact. They do not need Please make check payable to “New Ways to explain the nature of their interaction or experience with him in the initial contact. Follow-up Ministry”. Outside the US, please use only checks drawn on a US bank in US dollars or material will be sent to them to elicit the type of information that is needed. go to www.newwaysministry.org.  Ask other organizations to which you belong who also might know people who encountered Fr. Judge to share this information. Mail to: New Ways Ministry  Pray for the canonization of Fr. Judge. 4012 29th Street Mount Rainier, MD 20712 Fall-Winter 2017 BONDINGS Page 3 Message to Catholic LGBT people: 'Sisters are on our side!' By Sister Jeannine Gramick, SL "mine." It belonged to "the sisters." My from the Vatican calling for my dismissal support and expand the ministry. The Global Sisters Report congregational leaders had vision, from religious life if I continued in this Leadership Conference of Women January 2, 2018 imagination and foresight. They were ministry. It seems to me that the Loretto Religious (LCWR) encouraged their readers, thinkers and women of action presidents anticipated Pope Francis' advice members to engage in conversations with "History is written from the who tapped into needs that had been too to the International Union of Superiors local bishops about the issue of perspective of those who preserve their long neglected by our homosexuality. records," proclaimed Mark Bowman, the church. From the 1970s, Mary Ann Zollman, then president of founder and director of the Lesbian, Gay, three successive provincial the Sisters of Charity of the Blessed Bisexual, Transgender Religious Archives leaders of the School Sisters Virgin Mary, was a part of such a meeting Network .Standing before 300 people who of Notre Dame assigned me with her local bishops, in which some of work for LGBT acceptance in their to lesbian/gay ministry. (At them said that homosexuality was intrins- Christian churches, Mark opened the that time, there was no ically disordered because of an ethic based conference, "Rolling the Stone Away," to discussion or awareness of on natural law. remember the history of the LGBT transgender issues in the "I found myself tapping into a place movement and to look toward future Catholic community.) of grief and alienation," Mary Ann said of needs. They were strong that meeting. "In my heart's eye, I saw At this gathering in St. Louis, 50 women who did not flinch in faces of men and women I know whose founders, movers and shakers of the the face of numerous sexual orientation is gay or lesbian and LGBT Christian movement shared their complaints from lay who live compassionately, justly yearning stories to preserve a valuable piece of Catholics and some bishops for a return of compassion and justice on history. The wheelchairs parked on one and cardinals. In those days, the part of a church they love. I thought of side said a lot about the age of these Catholics were not as men and women whose passion for pioneers. accepting of lesbian/gay wholeness in relationship is lived in deep Now I felt honored to meet people people as they are today. The Sister Jeannine Gramick, SL commitment to life-long same-sex like Rev. Bill Johnson who, in 1972, Vatican lodged three requests partners. I heard deep in my own being, became the first openly gay person for internal investigations, but all General when he told them to answer any their struggle to find a home in our church. ordained in any Christian Church. provincials and three General Superiors Vatican letters politely and then continue … Around that meeting table, I was And Jimmy Creech, who was defrocked continued to support this new ministry. As on with their ministries. The Loretto compelled to speak on their behalf, to tell by the United Methodist Church for Nancy said, "The sisters were on our presidents did just that. the story of the beauty of their performing marriages of same-sex side!" During these years, some leaders of relationships, and to offer an alternative couples. When Vatican pressure became too other congregations even proposed a ethic of sexuality." But it was a remark by Rev. Nancy great for the School Sisters of Notre creative strategy if Vatican pressure In her outgoing address as President Wilson, the former Moderator of the Dame, the Sisters of Loretto stepped in persisted on the Loretto Sisters: A string of LCWR in 2003, Mary Ann Zollman Metropolitan Community Church, which and accepted me into their community. of communities could be in the wings to shared that story and went on to describe stayed with me and sparked some serious The Lorettos had a long history of accept me as I migrated from one her feelings, using the image of two trees. reflection. When I met Nancy, she greeted educating themselves about the injustice congregation to another! As Nancy said, "I could feel my roots moving toward me enthusiastically, saying, "Years ago, of and the rightness of "The sisters were on our side!" theirs and they leaning toward me as when I read about your situation, I knew welcoming all people into the church, The crisis with the Vatican was a together we want nothing more than to the sisters were on our side!" I have since even those who disagreed with traditional disguised blessing because it became a shape a home space for those who are thought about Nancy's words, and I sexual ethics. stepping-stone to educate some members 'other.' " She could resonate with their believe she was right on target. Prior to Pope Francis' election, the of the hierarchy. Scores of women leaders feelings because they were similar to the wrote to the Vatican about the need to My LGBT ministry was certainly not Loretto presidents received nine letters (Continued on page 6) : Pastors Can Deny Funerals to Married Lesbian and Gay Catholics

By Robert Shine for manifest sinners in which public ‘partner’ either by name or by other and their sexual morality, without an Bondings 2.0 scandal of the faithful can’t be avoided. If reference (nor reference to the unnatural equivalent focus on the sexual morality www.NewWaysMinistry.org/blog there is a doubt, the local ordinary is to be union) in any liturgical booklet, prayer (or morality in general) of straight October 24, 2017 consulted, and his judgment is to be card, homily, sermon, talk by the priest, Catholics, constitutes what the Catechism followed ( 1184.2).” deacon, etc… calls ‘unjust discrimination’ (#2358).” A second U.S. diocese has suggested Bartylla then listed a series of “It may be wise to keep the priest or Francis DeBernardo, executive Catholic funerals be denied to people in questions for pastors to consider when deacon involvement to the minimum (i.e., director of New Ways Ministry, said the same-gender civil marriages, going so far deciding whether to deny a funeral, limited to one priest or deacon and at guidelines are “directly opposed to the as to suggest the deceased person be including, “Was the deceased or the merely essential times of a service or rite, example that Pope Francis has been remembered without being named at all. ‘partner’ a promoter of the ‘gay’ if one occurs).” giving.” He continued in a statement: Msgr. James Bartylla, lifestyle?. . .Did the deceased give some These guidelines issued by the “These suggestions are blatantly of the Diocese of Madison which is signs of repentance before death?” The Diocese follow another attempt earlier discriminatory and seemed designed more headed by Bishop Robert Morlino, offered vicar listed some “preliminary this year to deny pastoral care to Cath- to push people away from the church than diocesan priests this new guidance in a considerations” for pastors: olics in same-gender civil marriages. to receive them in a loving embrace at one communication which was then reported “To minimize scandal, should there Bishop Thomas Paprocki of Springfield of their most sensitive times of need. on by the blog Pray Tell. In a section merely be a short scripture service at the issued pastoral guidelines that said such “While the church leaders of the titled “Consideration of Funeral Rites for funeral home? Or maybe merely a Catholics should not be given Madison diocese may think that they are a Person in a Homosexual Civil or graveside service? Maybe a later ‘Mass ecclesiastical funeral rites unless they preserving the Church, they are, in fact, Notorious Union,” Bartylla addressed for the Dead’ with or without explicit show “some signs of repentance before harming it by so callously refusing to people in same-gender civil marriages or, mention of the name of the deceased or their death.” Paprocki’s guidelines, provide any sort of solace to Catholic what he described as, “an otherwise ‘partner’ could alternatively or in addition released on the anniversary of the families who are grieving. What do these notorious homosexual relationship be offered at the parish or even at another massacre at Pulse Nightclub in Orlando, leaders think about how people, gay and gravely contrary to the natural law. . .” He parish (to avoid scandal), with or without also barred people in same-gender civil straight, will respond to such a gesture? urged pastors to “think through the issue family members present. marriages from being received into the Clearly, many will find comfort and thoroughly and prudently” in consultation “Any surviving ‘partner’ should not church or participating in any liturgical solace in other places of faith. Even if not with the local Ordinary (currently have any public or prominent role at any ministries. enacted, this decision’s announcement Morlino) when confronted with the death ecclesiastical funeral rite or service. Several bishops have introduced alone will already cause people to flee.” of such a person. The guidance continued: “A great risk for scandal and confu- pastoral restrictions as marriage equality DignityUSA’s Marianne Duddy- “The main issue centers around sion is for the name of the celebrating has spread in recent years. Philadelphia’s Burke said in a statement that the Dio- scandal and confusion. . .and thereby the priest and/or the parish to be listed in any Archbishop Charles Chaput’s attempted cese’s guidance is “the very antithesis of pastoral task is to minimize the risk of public (e.g., newspaper) or semi-public to bar LGBT people from both pastoral care” which suggests lesbian and scandal and confusion to others amidst the obituary or notice that also lists the pre- Communion and liturgical ministries, gay people “should be demeaned even in solicitude for the deceased and family. deceased or surviving ‘partner’ in some and of death.” It is “heartless. . .cruel. . .un- “If the situation warrants (see canon manner. This can’t happen for obvious and John Myers, formerly of christian in the extreme,” she added. 1184 – specifically canon 1184.1.3), reasons. Newark, both told LGBT Catholics and Celebrating the sacraments, especial- ecclesiastical funeral rites may be denied “There should be no mention of the their allies not to receive Communion. ly in people’s most pained moments, is Commenting on both the Diocese of central to the church’s mission. While Madison’s actions and the firing of a may protect the right of bish- church worker because of her same- ops to deny sacraments as heads of dio- gender engagement, news which ceses, the divine law interrogates them as Bondings 2.0 broke , Fr. James Martin, SJ, to why church seek to do so in New Ways Ministry’s blog offered his thoughts on Facebook: such an aggressive manner against LGBT “The problem, as I point out in people. It is dehumanizing to suggest a Bondings 2.0 ‘Building a Bridge,’ [Martin’s new book Catholic be remembered without being on LGBT issues in the church] is that named and without having their most these teachings are almost always applied intimate relationship valued, or at least selectively. That is, there is no equivalent acknowledged. The best way to keep up on the latest focus on the sexual morality of straight The Diocese of Madison’s guidelines Catholic LGBT news and opinions! Catholics at the time of their funerals. are a tragedy for LGBT Catholics, their (E.g., Was he or she divorced and loved ones, parish communities which remarried without an ? Was he may be affected, and the church as a Updated daily or she living together before marriage?) whole. It is my hope pastors will have the Share your ideas with others! “Nor is the sexual morality of straight courage to follow God’s law and celebrate Catholic school teachers placed under the lives and love of LGBT people whom such a microscope. (E.g., Is he or she God has called home.  NewWaysMinistry.org/blog living with a partner before marriage?). “The focus solely on LGBT people Page 4 BONDINGS Vol. 37, No. 1 All Politics Is Local. So Is LGBT Pastoral Care. By Francis DeBernardo . Our cities and our states often dictate can have an LGBT Catholic running for parishes. New Ways Ministry has been Bondings 2.0 how easily we can be our true selves at the exit doors. promoting and supporting such com- www.NewWaysMinistry.org/blog work, buy wedding cakes, construct The flip side works as well. It may munities since our creation 40 years ago. August 31, 2017 families — even die.” be great to hear Pope Francis make a It is exciting to see the growth and How does this relate to the world of positive statement of welcome to LGBT vibrancy of these communities across the Frank Bruni, a columnist for The New Catholic LGBT issues? I think Bruni’s people, but what really touches people’s U.S., and, indeed, across the globe. York Times offered an interesting observ- analysis of the political sphere very acc- hearts is when their local pastor asks them Bondings 2.0’s “All Are Welcome” series ation in an essay entitled “The Worst (and urately reflects the ecclesial sphere, as to be a part of a parish committee because chronicles developments in parish LGBT Best) Places to Be Gay in America” that well. In other words, I he wants the perspective ministry and it also includes posts was published in last Sunday’s edition. think that Catholic of LGBT people to be containing advice and resources for Noting the fact that equality for LGBT LGBT people are more heard as the parish parishes on how to start or further develop people varies widely across the vast and affected by local develops a new LGBT ministry programs. diverse 50 states of the U.S.A., Bruni church attitudes and program. New Ways Ministry has inaugurated notes: practices concerning All politics is local. So a special afternoon or evening program on “There’s no such thing as L.G.B.T. sexual orientation and is all pastoral care. transgender pastoral care for parishes, life in America, a country even more gender identity than Throughout my years in schools, and religious communities of divided on this front than on others. they are by the same Catholic LGBT men or women. There’s L.G.B.T. life in a group of essen- influences that are ministry, the most Additionally, New Ways Ministry tially progressive places like New York, expressed or enacted frequent question that I offers a program called “Next Maryland, Oregon and California, which by higher levels in the have been asked by Steps: Developing Catholic LGBT bans government-funded travel to states it Church. In other reporters or others not Ministry” which aids pastoral ministers deems unduly discriminatory. Then there words, what matters involved in the Catholic and volunteers envision a plan for is L.G.B.T. life on that blacklist, which most for LGBT LGBT community is proceeding in regard to LGBT ministry in includes Texas, Kansas, Mississippi and Catholics is not what “Why does an LGBT parish settings. The “Next Steps” South Dakota. the hierarchy says or person stay in the program is ideally conducted over the “The differences between states — does but what their Catholic Church?” If I course of a weekend, but can also be done and between cities within states — are local pastor and had a nickel for each in the course of a day, or even an profound, and while that has long been parishioners say or do. time it was asked, New afternoon (though obviously the material true, it’s much more consequential since When a pope or Ways Ministry would is abbreviated in the shorter versions). If the advent of the Trump administration, a bishop says some-thing be funded forever! you are interested in any of these decidedly less ready ally of L.G.B.T. offensive or damaging about LGBT The presumption behind that question progams, please contact New Ways people than the Obama administration people or issues, harm certainly is is that the Catholic Church is an oppress- Ministry at [email protected] was.” done. Yet, from what I have heard time ive place for LGBT people. However, as or 301-277-5674. Bruni, a gay man, gets even more and again from Catholic LGBT people– Bruni’s analysis shows for the political Look for an LGBT-friendly parish or local later in the essay, stating: whose faith and resiliency are amazingly world, which I suggest is true for the faith community near you using New “We’re at the mercy of our ZIP strong–is that hierarchical slights do not Catholic world, everything depends on Ways Ministry’s catalogue we have been codes: Lesbian, gay, bisexual and motivate them to leave their parishes. An where a persons lives and prays. maintaining for over 20 years (see transgender people are often affected most offensive remark from a pastor, pastoral This reality makes it all the more below).  by their municipality, not their state. . . minister, or even a parishioner, however, urgent to develop LGBT-friendly Catholic Gay-friendly Catholic Parishes & Communities Below is a list of known gay-friendly Catholic parishes and intentional Eucharistic communities. Thank you for helping us add to this growing list. If you are aware of a parish or community that welcomes LGBT Catholics, please let us know. Tell us if this welcome is because of a support program, spirituality group, mis- sion statement, participation in LGBT community events, or involvement with parents. To add your faith com- munity to our list, please contact New Ways Ministry at [email protected] or call 301-277- 5674. Parishes are listed first and intentional Eucharistic communities follow. For links to many of these par- ishes’ websites, go to www.NewWaysMinistry.org

Pasadena: Assumption of the B.V.M. Connecticut Redondo: St. Lawrence Martyr Guilford: St. George’s Iowa Redwood City: St. Matthias Hartford: St. Patrick-St. Anthony Coralville: St. Thomas More Ross: St. Anselm PARISHES Sacramento: St. Francis of Assisi Delaware San Carlos: St. Charles North Wilmington: Holy Child Kentucky Alabama San Diego: Ascension, St. John the Wilmington: St. Joseph Lexington: Historic St. Paul Church Decatur: Annunciation of the Lord Evangelist, St. Jude Shrine, Catho- Louisville: Epiphany, Cathedral of the Montgomery: St. Bede lic Community of UC,San Diego District of Columbia Assumption, St. William San Dimas: Holy Name of Mary Holy Trinity, St. Matthew Cathedral Louisiana Arizona San Francisco: Most Holy Redeemer, New Orleans: St. Augustine Chandler: St. Andrew Old St. Mary Cathedral, St. Agnes, Florida Glendale: St. Thomas More St. Dominic, St. Ignatius, St. Teresa Daytona Beach: Our Lady of Lourdes Maine Mesa: St. Bridget of Avila Flagler Beach: Santa Maria del Mar Portland: Sacred Heart-St. Dominic Phoenix: St. Matthew San Jose: St. Julie Billiart, Ft. Lauderdale: St. Anthony, Saco: Most Holy Trinity Scottsdale: St. Patrick St. Martin of Tours (Emmaus St. Maurice Tucson: St. Cyril of Alexandria, Community) Kissimmee: Holy Redeemer Maryland Ss. Peter and Paul, St. Pius X, San Luis Obispo: Mission San Luis St. Petersburg: Holy Cross Baltimore: Corpus Christi, Our Mother of Sorrows, St. Odilia San Ramon: St. Joan of Arc Tampa: Sacred Heart, Christ the King St. Francis of Assisi, St. Ignatius, San Raphael: Church of San Raphael St. Matthew, California & Georgia St. Vincent dePaul Berkeley: Holy Spirit Parish Mission San Raphael Arcangel Atlanta: Shrine of the Immaculate Columbia: St. John the Evangelist Burney: St Francis of Assisi Santa Barbara: OL of Guadalupe Conception Gaithersburg: St. Rose of Lima Carlsbad: St. Patrick Santa Cruz: Holy Cross Hagerstown: St. Ann Camarillo: Padre Serra Parish Santa Monica: St. Monica Idaho Severn: St. Bernadette Claremont: Our Lady of Assumption Simi Valley: St. Rose of Lima Boise: St. Mary El Cajon: St. Luke Spring Valley: Santa Sophia Massachusetts Encino: Our Lady of Grace Stanford: Catholic Community at Stan- Illinois Boston: Paulist Center, St. Anthony Escondido: St. Timothy ford University Berwyn: St. Mary of the Celle Shrine, St. Cecilia Fremont: St. Joseph-Mission San Jose South Pasadena: Holy Family Chicago: Immaculate Conception, Buzzard’s Bay: St. Margaret’s/StMary’s Fresno: St.. Paul Catholic Newman Valinda: St. Martha St. Clement, St. Gertrude, East Longmeadow: St. Michael Center Vernon: Holy Angels Catholic Church St. Gregory, St. Peter, St. Sylvester, Newton: St. Ignatius Goleta: St. Mark Univ. Parish of the Deaf St. Teresa of Avila, St. Thomas the Provincetown: St. Peter Hawthorne: St. Joseph (Spanish) Walnut Creek: St. John Vianney Apostle, Our Lady of Lourdes, Our Sharon: Our Lady of Sorrows Hayward: All Saints West Hollywood: St. Ambrose, Lady of Mt. Carmel, Springfield: Sacred Heart LaPuente: St. Martha St. Victor Old St. Patrick Lemon Grove: St. John of the Cross Whittier: St. Mary of the Assumption Clarendon Hills: Notre Dame Long Beach: St. Matthew Country Club Hills: St. Emeric Ann Arbor: St. Mary Student Parish Los Angeles: Blessed Sacrament, Colorado Evanston: St. Nicholas Detroit: St. Leo, Christ the King, Gesu Christ the King, Mother of Good Arvada: Spirit of Christ Inverness: Holy Family Parish Counsel, St. Camillus Center-LA Avon: St. Edward Johnston City: St. Paul St. Ignace: St. Ignatius Loyola USC Medical Center (Spanish), Colorado Springs: Sacred Heart Morton Grove: St. Martha Westland: Ss. Simon and Jude St. Agatha, St. Paul the Apostle Denver: St. Dominic, Christ the King, Oak Park: Ascension, St. Catherine of North Hollywood: St. Jane Frances de Our Lady of Mount Carmel Sienna-St. Lucy, St. Giles Minnesota Chantal, St. Patrick Lafayette: Immaculate Conception Schaumburg: St. Marcelline Minneapolis: St. Frances Cabrini, Oakland: Our Lady of Lourdes, St. Co- Littleton: Light of the World, St. Joan of Arc lumba, St. Jarleth St Frances Cabrini Indiana Oceanside: St. Thomas More Dyer: St. Maria Goretti Orange: Holy Family Cathedral Indianapolis: St. Thomas Aquinas (Continued on page 5) Fall-Winter 2017 BONDINGS Page 5 Catholic church offers outstretched hand to LGBT community with special Mass By Rob Nikolewski “To you parents, there is no denying needs to take steps to heal that.” Catholic from El Cajon who called the San Diego Union-Tribune your own sons and daughters, whatever Once becoming pope in 2013, Francis “Always Our Children” pastoral message October 7, 2017 their walk in life,” Dolan said during his has not made major changes to the Cath- “a flawed document that had to be homily. olic Church’s doctrine against homosexual revised” the following year. Kyle Escobar-Humphries made it a Just before mass, Dolan said: “This acts but made headlines when, early in his “The church is bending with the point to attend mass Saturday morning at parish falls within the Hillcrest district and papacy, he said, "If a person is gay and cultural zeitgeist. The church is bending St. John The Evangelist Catholic Church. there are a number of people in our com- seeks God and has good will, who am I to with the times and with the pervasiveness Located in the heart of Hillcrest, the munity here who want to participate in the judge?" of homosexual activism throughout the historic epicenter of the gay community in life of the church, and we want to make Richard Peterson, 26, is a gay country and indeed the globe,” Smith said. San Diego, St. John’s hosted a special parishioner at St. John’s “And we feel the Church should stand service aimed at reaching out to LGBT who volunteers with the strong as a bulwark against cultural trends members, their families and friends. church’s LGBT ministry. … Our concern today is the Church is Escobar-Humphries is gay and has been Although Peterson said becoming too accommodating to homo- married for nearly three years to another he’s never had a “large sexuality.” man, Snapper Escobar-Humphries. crisis of faith,” he Bishop McElroy said he understands Together they sat near the front of the acknowledged that many the criticism the church receives from a church with their 8- and 9-year-old in the gay community variety of sources. children as John Dolan have problems with “Our founder was Christ. Jesus of the Roman Catholic Diocese of San Roman Catholic took it from all sides,” McElroy said. Diego celebrated mass before a crowd of leadership. “And even if we’re doing things right — about 300. “The church is made and I’m not saying we are doing all things “It’s important because my kids have of humans and humans right, we’ve got things to learn about this two gay dads and I would like for them to are not perfect,” — but even when we’re doing it right, it’s understand that this church is open for Doug Metz of Sacred Heart Catholic Church, left, and Richard Peterson said. “I think at not a bad sign if you’re getting it from all everybody,” said the 46-year-old, who Marquez of the Diocese of San Diego, right, join parishioners at the the core of it you have to sides.” said he is a lifelong Catholic. “I want them St. John the Evangelist Church at a Mass to reach out to families look at what the church Emily Reimer-Barry, an associate to understand how to treat each other and friends of the LGBT community. stands for, which is love professor and theologian at the University equally.” and mercy and forgiveness and of San Diego, attended Saturday’s mass The service commemorated the 20th sure they have a welcome home in some community. That’s what this parish is and called it “beautiful and empowering.” anniversary of a document released by the fashion here within the church.” trying to do here.” “I think anyone who doesn’t wrestle United States Conference of Catholic McElroy said the diocese is making But while the church gets criticism for with their faith is not a thinking person,” Bishops called “Always Our Children” an effort to reach out to LGBT members at not moving fast enough on sexual and said Reimer-Barry, who is heterosexual, that offered “an outstretched hand” to parishes across the San Diego area, but the cultural issues, it also gets grief from some married with two children and Catholic. parents and family members of gay mass Saturday amplified something larger. on the opposite end. “It’s not an easy process. But I also have Catholics. “Pope Francis is calling us to reach A group of about a half-dozen gath- faith that God is there in the messiness … Accompanied by San Diego Bishop out to everyone with a message of radical ered outside St. John’s, handing out An event like today’s is a time when the Robert McElroy and priests from around inclusion,” McElroy said. “Sadly, there literature criticizing Saturday’s service. community gathers to support each other the area, Dolan underscored the pastoral has been an estrangement and an alien- “We’re criticizing the church for and say, yes, we are all in this together.” message released in 1997. ation with LGBT people, and the Church modernism,” said Allyson Smith, a 

(Continued from page 4) St. Francis of Assisi, St. Francis de Houston: St. Anne, St. Teresa Sales Odessa: St. Elizabeth Ann Seton Missouri Pittsford: Church of Transfiguration Kansas City: Guardian Angels, Holy Rochester: Blessed Sacrament, Virginia Family St. Mary (Downtown), St. Monica Arlington: Our Lady Queen of Peace St. James Saratoga Springs: St. Peter Glen Allen: St. Michael the Archangel St. Joseph: St. Francis Xavier Syracuse: St. Lucy, All Saints Mechanicsville: Church of the Re- St. Louis: St. Cronan, St. Margaret of Utica: Our Lady of Mount Carmel, deemer Scotland, St. Pius V Historic Old St. John’s Richmond: Cathedral of the Sacred Wading River: St. John the Baptist Heart, Sacred Heart Parish Montana Wantaugh: St. Frances de Chantal Roanoke: St. Gerard Billings: Holy Rosary, St. Pius X West Islip: Our Lady of Lourdes Triangle: St. Francis Westbury: St. Brigid Virginia Beach: St. Nicholas Nebraska Prince of Peace, Trinity-Guadalupe Omaha: Holy Family, Sacred Heart North Carolina Washington Wauwatosa: St. Pius X Charlotte: St. Peter Seattle: Christ Our Hope, St. Benedict, Nevada Durham: Immaculate Conception St. James Cathedral, St. Joseph, Canada Las Vegas: Christ the King, Fayetteville: St. Patrick Prince of Peace Montreal: Holy Cross, Saint-Pierre- Guardian Angel Cathedral Raleigh: St. Francis of Assisi Newman Center Apôtre,_ Tacoma: St. Leo Ottawa: St. Joseph New Hampshire Ohio Toronto: Our Lady of Lourdes Merrimack: St. John Neumann Akron: St. Bernard Wisconsin Pelham: St. Patrick Cincinnati: St. George-St. Monica, Fond du Lac: Holy Family England St. Robert Bellarmine Madison: Our Lady Queen of Peace London: Church of the Immaculate New Jersey Cleveland: Blessed Trinity, Menomonee Falls: Good Shepherd Conception (Mayfair) Keyport: St. Joseph St. Malachi, St. Martha Milwaukee: Good Shepherd, Lawrenceville: St. Ann Columbus: St. Thomas More Long Beach Island: St. Francis of Newman Center Assisi Fairlawn: St. Hilary Maplewood: St. Joseph Mentor: St. John Vianney Monmouth: Church of the Precious University Heights: Church of Gesu INTENTIONAL EUCHARISTIC COMMUNITIES Blood Westlake: St. Ladislas Pompton Lakes: St. Mary Wooster: St. Mary of the Immaculate Arizona South Plainfield: Sacred Heart Conception Scottsdale: Franciscan Renewal Michigan Tinton Falls: St. Anselm Center Grand Rapids: Marywood Oregon Kalamazoo: Lambda Catholics New Mexico Beaverton: Mission of the Atonement California Albuquerque: Holy Family, Portland: St. Andrew, St. Francis of Orange: Koinonia Minnesota Shrine of St. Bernadette Assisi, St. Phillip Neri, Down- Pleasanton: Catholic Community of Minneapolis: Spirit of St. Stephen's Espanola: Sacred Heart of Jesus town Chapel (St. Vincent de Paul) Pleasanton Catholic Community San Diego: Mary Magdalene Catholic New York Pennsylvania Community Oregon Albany: St. Vincent DePaul Danville: St. Joseph Portland: Journey and Koinonia Baldwinsville: St. Augustine Philadelphia: Old St. Joseph, District of Columbia Catholic Community Bellmore: St. Barnabas the Apostle Old St. Mary, St. John the Communitas Bellport: Mary Immaculate Evangelist, St. Vincent DePaul Pennsylvania Binghamton: St. Francis of Assisi Wilkinsburg: St. James Florida Pittsburgh: Dignity//Pittsburgh Brooklyn: St. Andrew the Apostle, Tampa: Franciscan Center St. Boniface, St. Athanasius, Rhode Island Virginia St. Augustine, Immac.Heart of Mary Providence: St. Raymond Iowa Arlington: NOVA Catholic Community Deer Park: Ss. Cyril and Methodius Wickford: St. Bernard Coralville: Full Circle Small Faith East Islip: St. Mary Tennessee Community Washington Elmira: St. Mary Memphis: Cathedral of the Lacey: Holy Wisdom Inclusive Fairport: Church of the Assumption Immaculate Conception Maryland Catholic Community Henrietta: Good Shepherd Baltimore, Annapolis, Thurmont: Manhattan: Holy Name of Jesus, Texas Living Water Inclusive Catholic Wisconsin St. Francis Xavier, St. Ignatius Colleyville: Good Shepherd Community Madison: Holy Wisdom Monastery Loyola, St. Paul the Dallas: Holy Trinity Greenbelt: Greenbelt Catholic Milwaukee: Mary of Magdala, Apostle to Apostle, Church of the Ascension, El Paso: All Saints Community the Apostles Page 6 BONDINGS Vol. 37, No. 1 'God bless you, Father!' Parishioners support pastor who reveals he is gay By Heidi Schlumpf react negatively may be choosing not to The National Catholic Reporter come out to him and risk retribution. "closeted," isn't easy or healthy, said from his job as chaplain at Seton Hall December 18, 2017 Franciscan Fr. Ralph Parthie, who Loretto Sr. Jeannine Gramick, a co- University and later barred from ministry was ordained in 1975, considers himself founder of New Ways Ministry. It by then-Archbishop John Myers of Milwaukee — Fr. Greg Greiten was lucky since early on in his priesthood, a "doesn't enable them to be the full human Newark, although the punishment halfway through his homily, during which "very enlightened" ostensibly was for Hall supporting gay he shared that he is a gay, celibate priest, provincial suggested the advocacy groups, not for being gay when a woman rose from her pew and friars have an open himself. shouted, "God bless you, Father!" The rest conversation about "The gay priest does not know what of the congregation at St. Bernadette homosexuality to better will happen and maybe is not willing to Parish, where Greiten is pastor, responded understand one another take a risk because there may be negative with applause. and live their vocations. consequences — or he thinks there will be More applause and a standing ovation He came out slowly, negative consequences," said Gramick. came when Greiten finished explaining first to close friends and Fear of negative consequences comes that he was going to "no longer live in the family, but has been open from the very top of the Catholic hiera- shadow of secrecy" during the 10:30 a.m. about his sexual orienta- rchy. Just a year ago, the Congregation Mass Sunday, Dec. 17. tion for a couple of dec- for Clergy updated the norms and guide- After Mass, over coffee and dough- ades, especially as he lines for men studying for the priesthood. nuts, parishioners responded positively or became involved in LGBT The updated norms draw heavily from with nonchalance. ministry and service those guidelines issued in 1992 under Pope "I could care less," said Madge with HIV/AIDS. John Paul II and 2005 under Pope Powell, a parishioner for eight years. "I "I wasn't afraid, Benedict XVI, which advise against admit love him for the person he is." because my province was -ting "to the seminary or to Choir member Luci Crosland and really so healthy about it," Fr. Greg Gretien presiding at Mass at St. Bernadette those who practice homosexuality, pres- others were impressed with Greiten's said Parthie, who is di- parish, Milwaukee, on the day he came out as gay to ent deep-seated homosexual tenden-cies bravery, especially since they suspect not rector of friar life and his congregation. or support the so-called 'gay culture.' " every parishioner will be supportive. secretary for formation for These documents, and some church Shawn Govern doesn't support gay the Franciscan Province of the Sacred leaders, conflate sexual orientation and marriage, but was impressed by his Heart, based in St. Louis. beings that God intended them to be." sexual activity, according to Gramick. pastor's honesty. "He made a choice to The first person Fr. Frederick Daley, That is "so debilitating ... for their min- "They believe that if you're gay, that walk in Christ's shoes, because he's not now 70 and pastor of All Saints Parish in istry and their relationships in general." means you're sexually active. But if you going to be accepted by everyone," said Syracuse, New York, told about his sexual Parthie said, "Secrets kill. When you have this orientation and are not sexually Govern, adding that St. Bernadette's is orientation was his spiritual director, a have to keep parts of yourself secret active, then you're not really gay. That's a "not a liberal bastion." common experience with gay priests. because you're afraid people won't love or fallacy." Margaret Thorn, chair of the parish Daley expected condemnation, but instead respect you, that's not healthy." Gay, celibate priests are actually festival committee, said she supports received the "tremendous grace" of under- Before Daley was ordained in 1974, following the church's teaching on sexual Greiten "100 percent." standing and compassion. he repressed any thoughts, feelings or ethics, she said. "He's such a kind and caring person," He was inspired to come out more discussion of sexuality. After ordination, The generalizations about gay priests Thorn said. That her parish priest is gay publicly in the wake of the clergy sexual he found that though he loved being a in the 2016 formation document were "doesn't matter," she said. abuse crisis in the church, when he felt priest, he felt unusually sad. Ultimately, hurtful, Parthie said. "I know many holy Greiten's experience is not unusual. In gay priests were being unfairly scapeg- he said, he realized it was because he gay priests, just like I know many holy fact, most gay priests who tell others oated. After meeting with his auxiliary hadn't acknowledged, even to himself, straight priests." about their sexual orientation say they are bishop, Daley shared that he was gay with that he was gay. Daley worries that the current happier and healthier since "coming out." a local newspaper reporter who "The fear and depression around polarized climate in the church is not And their parishioners, fellow priests and interviewed him about an award he had coming to that conclusion was very helpful for LGBT people. But his biggest even superiors usually respond positively won. agonizing," remembered Daley. "Slowly, concern is formation of new priests and to the news. After the next day's headline — but surely, I was able to accept who I was the repressive attitude at some seminaries. "All of the priests I've met who have "Father Daley declares he's gay" — his and ultimately rejoice in who I was." "That's a very unhealthy atmosphere come out have told me that their parish- parish gave him a standing ovation. He "I loved being a priest and was for a person to grow in pycho-sexual ioners or the people they minister to have received no negative reaction, except for a committed to the priesthood," he said, "So development," he said, noting that many had no problem with learning their sexual few letters to the editor from national I chose to continue in ministry and con- of his fellow priests reacted to his coming orientation," said Francis DeBernardo, news coverage. tinue living a celibate life." out with silence. who has worked with LGBT Catholics for "I think the Catholic community is far His explicit mention of celibacy is But Parthie believes "God doesn't 22 years as part of New Ways Ministry ahead of its leadership on this issue," he necessary, because some people equate care if a person is gay or straight," he and is currently its executive director. said. homosexuality with sexual activity. "It's said. "It's what you do with that that's Although accurate numbers about out Research data supports Daley's unfortunate but necessary for priests who most important." gay priests — or gay priests at all — are assertion. For example, more than two- do come out to have to add that qualifi- At 71, he knows who he is and who hard to come by, DeBernardo said most thirds of U.S. Catholics now support gay cation," noted DeBernardo. God calls him to be. "I'm not worried are supported by their bishops or religious marriage, according to a 2017 Pew Daley did get some pushback in 2006 about people who can't see beyond their superiors. It's likely, however, that priests Research Center poll. when he was being considered for a posi- own fears and prejudices," he said. who sense their bishop or superior would Coming out is not easy, but staying tion with Catholic Relief Services in For Daley, being out has been a gift Africa, when the job offer was rescinded to his ministry. "I realized one of my over what he believed was his sexual greatest gifts to those who are marginal- LGBT People: ‘Sisters are on our side!” orientation. CRS told ABC News it was ized and struggling is to share my own Daley's activism, not his orientation that struggle," he said. "I have no regrets at (Continued from page 3) teacher in San Francisco came out as would have been problematic in Africa. all." ache of homelessness she felt as a woman transgender and had the public backing of Parthie has never had any negative Drew Prusko, who attended Mass at in the church. the Sisters of Mercy who operated the reaction, although he is sure that some St. Bernadette with his husband and heard Not surprisingly, her address was part high school. Shortly thereafter the Sisters fellow priests are not comfortable with his the homily in which Greiten came out, of the Vatican's investigation of LCWR. of St. Agnes in Fond du Lac, Wisconsin, being out. "But it's never really been an was inspired by the priest's words. "I grew Answering the Vatican's concerns took organized a public prayer vigil after the issue," he said, including when requesting up Catholic, but I haven't stepped foot in much time and energy, but it was worth it rampant shooting of LGBT people at an priestly faculties when working in a dio- a Catholic Church in a long time," he because it was another instance where Orlando night club. Six months later, the cese. said. "If I had known a priest that shared sisters were educating church authorities. Sisters of the Congregation of Mother That does not mean, however, the what he did today, maybe my spiritual If Nancy knew, she would say, "The Carmel in India offered their buildings for fear of coming out is not real. For exam- development would have been different." sisters were on our side!" a school for transgender people who had ple, in 2015, Fr. Warren Hall was fired  But the first Catholic organization to dropped out because of the psychological support gay and lesbian persons was trauma they experienced. Yes, "The sisters the National Coalition of American Nuns. were on our side!" Time for dialogue on sexual ethics The board of this small, grassroots nuns' So many women religious have (Continued from page 1) spent the past four decades developing group publicly called for civil rights for affirmed the goodness of LGBT students as they are in their campaign against same new frameworks for sexual morality and gay and lesbian people back in 1974. The or strangers. Sisters have opened their -sex marriage, perhaps more Catholics ethical decision-making based on our organization also publicly supported the motherhouses and retreat centers for would realize how urgent the need is to evolving understanding of sexuality. right of same-sex couples to marry and LGBT programs. Many have signed rethink the entirety of the church’s sexual Sadly, those who have made the greatest spoke out against bullying of LGBT petitions, demonstrated, or written letters ethics. contributions to deepening our under- people. Once again, "The sisters were on of complaint when LGBT people are fired We strongly encourage dialogue standing of sexual ethics, such as Fr. our side!" from Catholic institutions. Some have between laypeople and church leaders Charles Curran and Mercy Sr. Margaret Since the late 1990s, sisters have marched in solidarity in gay pride parades. regarding all issues in the sexual sphere. Farley, have been silenced or had their ministered among transgender people, Sisters have been part of the LGBT But we also recognize that dialogue can work condemned by bishops and the healing spirits and saving lives. Members struggle in the past; they are their allies have its limits, particularly if those in Congregation for the Doctrine of the of several congregations including the today. And, as this conference made me so leadership do not demonstrate an open- Faith. Eucharistic Missionaries of St. Dominic, very aware, sisters give LGBT people ness to developing the church’s teaching If we truly are living in a new culture Racine Dominicans, Dominican Sisters of much hope for the future. on sex and sexuality. of encounter in the church, perhaps it is Peace, and the Sisters of St. Joseph of I'm counting on the fact that the We call on bishops to continue the time for the Vatican to engage these Carondelet have companioned transgender names and ministries of all these sisters work of developing the doctrine of Catholic theologians and ethicists in a people and their families on this sacred are preserved in the archives of women's sexuality that began in Vatican II. This constructive dialogue about the fruits of journey. Through a ministry of presence religious congregations. What a loss to work has largely been stalled by the their ethical inquiries. Until the church is and accompaniment, the sisters have church history and to the cause of justice hierarchy’s unwillingness to loosen its willing to engage in a deep re-examin- welcomed transgender folks into their if these records were not saved or were rigid interpretation of millennia-old ideas ation of its doctrine on sexuality and lives and been welcomed in return. The thought too sensitive to keep. Mark about natural law and the procreation sexual relationships, any dialogue sisters' basic message is that God loves Bowman's opening words at the norm. around LGBT inclusion or divorce and them for who they are. conference play like a refrain in my ears: Of course, the work has continued remarriage will only be stymied.  The sisters' support has not been only "History is written from the perspective of outside of the walls of the Vatican, led by on a private level. Last year, a Catholic those who preserve their records."  Catholic moral theologians who have Fall-Winter 2017 BONDINGS Page 7 The Ten Worst and the Ten Best Catholic LGBT News Events of 2017

At the end of each year, New Ways Ministry asks the readers of Bondings 2.0 our daily blog on Catholic LGBT news, opinion, and spirituality, to vote for the worst and best Catholic LGBT news events of the previous 12 months. The following are the 10 highest vote-getters for the “Worst” and for the “Best” category. They are presented in order of highest votes (#1) to lowest votes (#10). Each item contains the percentage of votes cast for that event. The Worst The Best

1. Fr. James Martin, SJ, publishes 1. Bishops Paprocki (Springfield, Building a Bridge: How the Catholic Illinois) and Morlino (Madison, Church and the LGBT Community Can Wisconsin) issue guidelines denying pastoral care, sacraments, and Enter into a Relationship of Respect, Compassion, and Sensitivity, a book funerals to legally married lesbian/ which sparks a global conversation in gay couples. (87%) 2. At least four cases became public this church circles. (79%) year of gay and lesbian teachers being 2. Cardinal Joseph Tobin welcomes a pilgrimage of LGBT people to the fired, continuing the national cathedral in Newark, New Jersey. employment crisis in the Catholic Church around LGBT issues. (50%) Welcome Masses for LGBT people 3. (TIE) In approving its agenda, the also held in San Diego (US), Nottingham (UK). (58%) U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops 3. Pope Francis continues to make continues its “culture war” mentality, in spite of guidance from Pope positive statements towards LGBT people, in one case sending blessings Francis to instead emphasize mercy and congratulations to a gay couple on and accompaniment. (44%) the baptism of their children, and in 4. (TIE) M. Shawn Copeland and Fr. James Martin, SJ, have lectures canceled in Catholic venues because of their another case acknowledging the need for legal civil unions for lesbian and gay couples. (48%) support for LGBT people. (44%) 4. A nationwide survey in the U.S. shows that Catholics oppose allowing small 5. A National Catholic Reporter investigation into the Knights of Columbus’ finances businesses to refuse service to gay and lesbian people because of a religiously reveals that the Knights have spent significant money to oppose pro-LGBT initiatives. (42%) held belief. (36%) 5. Irish bishops indicate that all families will be welcome at World Meeting of 6. Church leaders, including Pope Francis, continue to decry the undefined concept Families gathering in Dublin in 2018. (32%) of “gender ideology” as part of their statements criticizing the transgender equality 6. (TIE) Cardinal Blase Cupich of Chicago says he wants to dialogue with LGBT movement. (36%) 7. In at least two cases, transgender individuals are denied health care at Catholic people to learn from them. (31%) 7. (TIE) Luxembourg’s openly gay prime minister and his husband were officially hospitals. (29%) welcomed at the Vatican. (31%) 8. Archbishop Broglio of the U.S. Military Archdiocese supports President Trump’s 8. Malta, Australia, Germany pass marriage equality laws with minimal interference proposed ban on transgender people serving in the armed forces. (27%) 9. An Illinois state court upholds the firing of Colin Collette, a gay man fired from from Catholic leaders. (28%) 9. Bishop John Stowe, OFM, Conv., emerges as a voice for LGBT inclusion at New his job as parish music director because of his intent to marry his partner. (21%) Ways Ministry’s Eighth National Symposium and an interfaith prayer service for 10. In Malawi, Catholic bishops promote and participate in nationwide marches which Pride. (27%) were held to oppose the legalization of homosexuality. (18%) 10. In India, Carmelite Sisters and lay Catholics open school for transgender youth.

LGBT-friendly Catholic Colleges and Universities

Below is a list of known LGBT-friendly Catholic colleges and universities, that is, those Catholic institutions that have some type of gay/ LGBT student group, support group, ally group, etc. If you are aware of such a college that is known as welcoming to LGBT people, please let us know.

Alabama Iowa Montana Mobile: Spring Hill College Davenport: St. Ambrose University Helena: Carroll College Pennsylvania Dubuque: Loras College, Clarke University Cresson: Mount Aloysius College California Nebraska Dallas: Misericordia University Belmont: Notre Dame de Namur University Kentucky Omaha: Creighton University Erie: Mercyhurst College Goleta: St. Mark’s University Louisville: Spalding University, Greensburg: Seton Hill University Los Angeles: Loyola Marymount Universi- Bellarmine University New Hampshire Philadelphia: Chestnut Hill College, ty, Mount Saint Mary’s College Manchester: St. Anselm College LaSalle University, St. Joseph’s Moraga: St. Mary’s College Louisiana Nashua: Rivier College University Oakland: Holy Names University New Orleans: Loyola University Pittsburgh: Carlow University, Ranchos Palos Verde: Marymount College New Jersey Duquesne University San Diego: University of San Diego Maryland Caldwell: Caldwell College Radnor: Cabrini College San Francisco: University of San Baltimore: Notre Dame of Jersey City: St. Peter’s College Reading: Alvernia University Francisco Maryland University, South Orange: Seton Hall Scranton: Marywood University Santa Clara: Santa Clara University Loyola University of Maryland Villanova: Villanova University New York Colorado Massachusetts Albany: College of Saint Rose Rhode Island Denver: Regis University Boston: Emmanuel College, Brooklyn and Patchogue: Newport: Salve Regina University Chestnut Hill: Boston College St. Joseph’s College Providence: Providence College Connecticut Chicopee: Elms College Bronx: Fordham University, Fairfield: Fairfield University, Easton: Stonehill College Manhattan College Texas Sacred Heart University North Andover: Merrimack College Buffalo: Canisius College Austin: Saint Edward’s University New Haven: Albertus Magnus College Weston: Regis College Loudonville: Siena College San Antonio: University of the Incarnate West Hartford: Saint Joseph College Worcester: Assumption College, New Rochelle: College of New Rochelle, Word, Our Lady of the Lake College of the Holy Cross Iona College University District of Columbia Poughkeepsie: Marist College Georgetown University, Trinity University Michigan Rochester: St. John Fisher College Vermont Detroit: University of Detroit Mercy, St. Bonaventure: St. Bonaventure Colchester: Saint Michael’s College Florida University Miami Gardens: St. Thomas University Grand Rapids: Aquinas College Sparkill: St. Thomas Aquinas College Washington Miami Shores: Barry University Syracuse: LeMoyne College Lacey: St. Martin’s College Minnesota Queens: St. John’s University Seattle: Seattle University Hawaii Collegeville: St. John’s University Spokane: Gonzaga University Honolulu: Chaminade University Duluth: College of St. Scholastica Ohio Minneapolis: College of St. Catherine Cincinnati: Xavier University West Virginia Illinois St. Joseph: College of Saint Benedict Cleveland Heights: John Carroll University Wheeling: Wheeling Jesuit University Chicago: DePaul University, Loyola Uni- St. Paul: St. Thomas University Dayton: University of Dayton versity, St. Xavier University Winona: St. Mary’s University of Pepper Pike: Ursuline College Wisconsin Joliet: University of St. Francis Minnesota South Euclid: Notre Dame College De Pere: St. Norbert College River Forest: Dominican University in Illi- Sylvania: Lourdes College Madison: Edgewood College nois Missouri Milwaukee: Alverno College, Romeoville: Lewis University Kansas City: Avila University, Oregon Cardinal Stritch University, Rockhurst University Marylhurst: Marylhurst University Marquette University Indiana St. Louis: Fontbonne University, Portland: University of Portland Notre Dame: Holy Cross College, St. St. Louis University Canada Mary’s College, Univ. of Notre Dame Toronto: Regis College Page 8 BONDINGS Vol. 37, No. 1 Always Our Children: U.S. Bishops’ Pastoral Letter 20 Years Later

By Casey and Mary Ellen Lopata As , we provided initial core message, tone, and direction… sensitive language send a powerful Bondings 2.0 input during the document’s preparation remain the same….the [CDF] has message. An affirmative pastoral ministry www.NewWaysMinistry.org/blog and we commented on a draft. Under- reviewed [it] and… is satisfied with the tool for parents, church ministers and October 1, 2017 standing that the bishops were limited in result.” But to LGBTQ advocates, adding allies, AOC’s welcoming pastoral focus their purpose– to reach out to parents footnotes citing Church documents that continues to challenge the doctrinal Twenty years ago today, on October based on the “Church’s teaching” and to call homosexual orientation a disorder and severity of the institutional Church. 1, 1997, the U.S. bishops’ not “break any new say sexual orientation can be taken into Vatican “Satisfied”: Of major Committee on Marriage ground theologi-cally” — account in opposing nondiscrimination significance, the CDF said it is “satisfied” and Family issued Always we were still elated when legislation significantly diluted AOC’s with the modified 3rd version. In effect, Our Children: A Pastoral the final draft was issued. intent “to speak words of faith, hope, and AOC now conveys the influence of a CDF Message to Parents of To the New York love to parents who need the Church’s document. Homosexual Children Times Mary Ellen said: loving presence…” Also, a description of Empowered Parents/Ministers: By AND Suggestions for “… many parents sexual orientation as a “fundamental” our count, the “official” recommendations Pastoral Ministers (AOC). struggle with the conflict dimension of a person was changed to enabled parents, ministers, allies to begin This document was long between loving their “deep-seated.” This change discredited and enhance at least 76 ministries (not overdue given the pastoral child and their actual gay and lesbian experiences. counting Dignity chapters) during these 20 damage caused by the understanding that These changes compounded AOC’s years. AOC’s official language and Congregation for the church teaching original shortfalls: compelling quotes provided a Doctrine of the Faith’s condemns their child. For 1) no mention of foundational support for these (CDF) 1986 letter, On the them to hear the bishops Catholic teaching on the ministries. Pastoral Care of Homo- say to love their child primacy of conscience and AOC was a significant sexual Persons. The harm- first…can go a long way how it can and does save response to the heartlessness ful language in the 1980s to help them resolve families and lives of the CDF’s 1986 letter. document — e.g. newly Mary Ellen & Casey Lopata those conflicts and begin 2) the institutional Strategically developed by characterizing a homo- some healing.” We know Church’s failure to promote some courageous bishops and sexual orientation as an “objective many parents shed tears of reassurance the statement. staff, AOC’s tone and mes- disorder” — still arouses rage in many and hopefulness upon reading the bishops’ Despite these issues, sage is reminiscent of the people. closing words: “to our homosexual AOC was and still is 1976 U.S. Bishops Call To After 1986, advocates slowly began brothers and sisters…. In you God’s love significant for these reasons: Action Conference that pro- to challenge the CDF’s soul-sapping is revealed.” Silence Broken: Major phetically called for justice for letter. Of significance was the 1992 New The National Catholic Report- media coverage of the docu- homosexual persons. Ways Ministry Symposium. There, er stated: “Parents and activists generally ment shattered silence in the Despite a passive launch Bishop Tom Gumbleton told of his mother welcomed…[AOC] for its appeal to Church about homosexuality. by most bishops and strong asking if her gay son, Dan, would go to parents to place support of gay and lesbian AOC humanized this “issue” criticism from Courage, hell. Gumbleton replied: “No…. That is children first, above moral condemnation that is too often buried in AOC’s compassionate, pas- the way God made him, and God wouldn’t of homosexual activity….” theological jargon and toral app-roach has inspired make people a certain way that means The Bishops’ Conference reported abstract rules. and has empowered many inevitably they’re going to hell.” more than 500 letters were received Best Possible: Despite supportive ministries. Today, In 1993, New Ways Ministry wrote to expressing support and gratitude. No more zealous opposition from AOC lives comfort-ably in the Gumbleton saying it was time “to study, than 50 criticized and found fault with Courage, enough dedicated Catholic world of Pope discuss, and draft a document on gay and AOC. gay-supportive bishops had enough savvy Francis.  lesbian issues as they relate to family However, strong protests from to produce the best possible document at life.” Gumbleton, with 13 other bishops, supporters of Courage, a Catholic ministry that time. Casey &Mary Ellen Lopata are officially proposed this to the U.S. bish- which views a gay and lesbian orientation Gay-Friendliest/Invaluable: the founders of Fortunate Families, a ops’ Committee on Marriage and Family, as a defect, resulted in AOC being re- Arguably the most gay-friendly official ministry with Catholic parents seeking and the project that would culminate issued in June 1998 with several modi- document from the U.S. bishops or justice for their LGBT daughters and sons in Always Our Children was born. fications. The Committee reported: “The Vatican, AOC’s overall tone and its in Church and society. Gender Ideology, Transgender Reality: A Deacon Parent’s Perspective By Deacon Ray Dever have nothing but respect for the good availability of information and frontation, and that a confrontation could Bondings 2.0 intentions that undoubtedly underlie these testimonials, there really is no excuse for become violent. Nobody should have to www.NewWaysMinistry.org/blog statements, but my personal experience is that kind of thinking. The American live that way. All that transgender September 18, 2017 that these statements have fueled Medical Association, the American individuals want is simply to live their misunderstanding and bigotry, and not Psychological Association, the American lives as who they are, with the same rights One morning this past spring, I found love, truth, and life that are the essence of Psychiatric Association, and the World and freedoms that the rest of us enjoy. myself somewhere I honestly never could Jesus Christ. Professional Association for Transgender My pastoral perspective is informed have imagined I would be: sitting in a These church discussions of Health, who together represent over by the call that all permanent deacons dreary courtroom in Washington, DC, “ideology of gender” do not ring true for 300,000 doctors, psychiatrists, and share: to bring the Church into the world with my firstborn. We were patiently anyone with any significant first-hand psychologists, have each affirmed the and to bring the problems of the world awaiting her turn before a judge. knowledge of trans individuals. Such reality of transgender back to the Church. Well, It was a long way from the familiar, people would be baffled by the suggestion individuals, and have here’s one such prob- comfortable surroundings of my home and that the trans people they know, or the issued documents lem: the community of my Catholic parish in sunny Tampa, presence of trans individuals in society, opposing all forms of faith includes transgender Florida. And it was an even longer way are somehow the result of an ideology of discrimination against people who are margin- from a place I was almost ten years ago, a gender. Long before there were gender them and providing alized, unjustly condemned, place of almost total ignorance of LGBTQ studies programs in any universities or the standards of health care and suffering simply be- issues. The issue that morning was a legal phrase “gender ideology” was ever for them. The United cause of who they are, and name change for my 23-year old trans- spoken, transgender people were present, Nations has opposed legal that marginalization and gender daughter, a recent graduate of recognized, and even valued in many discrimination and suffering extends to their Georgetown University. The name cultures around the world. violence that trans family and friends. Every change was another milestone in her Trans individuals are not people who individuals suffer in many time that a trans (or gay, challenging journey towards living as her have been indoctrinated into some parts of the world. lesbian, bisexual) kid is authentic self. While this milestone was ideology that convinces them they can Companies and organ- rejected by their family in certainly positive for my daughter, it simply choose their own gender. They izations we all do business the name of faith and ends forced me to reflect don’t just decide one with every day–from up homeless and struggling once again on the morning to start Apple to Wal-Mart– Deacon Ray Dever to survive, we as a people enormous and painful dressing different- recognize trans individuals of faith need to take respons- disconnect between the ly. They are trans- with equal employment opportunity ibility. We can’t just sweep it under the reality of the lives of gender by virtue of policies and inclusive health insurance. rug and hide behind some vague Church transgender individuals some combination of Since I wear the two hats of parent of document or isolated scripture passage. and the rampant biological and psych- a transgender woman and permanent In its discussion of gender misinformation that ological factors that deacon in the Church, my reaction to ideology, warns against often dominates scientists are just gender identity controversies is both falling into the sin of trying to replace the discourse about beginning to under- personal and pastoral. Creator. I definitely agree. But I think transgender issues in stand. The only From the personal perspective, I share this warning begs the question: are we both the Church and choice that trans the concerns of all parents for the well- guilty of that sin when we look at a the public square. individuals have in being of their children, including their transgender person and we have the hubris In his apostolic the matter is the adult children. These concerns are to deny what God has made? I pray that exhortation Amoris challenging choice to amplified when an LGBTQ individual is the Church will be open to learning and Laetitia, Pope Francis expressed concern embrace who they are and to live their involved. Our prayers and hopes for our embracing the truth about transgender with “an ideology of gender,” which he lives openly as their authentic selves, in children are colored by the reality of the individuals, who have the same inherent imagines to be an ideology that seeks to the face of rejection, discrimination, discrimination they will likely face for the value and dignity as all human beings. eliminate sexual differences in society, bigotry, and even violence that they know rest of their lives. The probability of Perhaps we all need to have a little more thereby undermining the basis for the they will have to endure. being a victim of violence or committing humility and a little more faith in what family. In the public sphere, recent efforts to suicide is greater for the LGBTQ com- God has created here on earth.  Independent of Amoris Laetitia, curtail legal protections for the trans- munity than for the general populace, and individuals in the Church hierarchy have gender community, including all the non- even greater for the transgender com- Deacon Ray Dever ministers at St. issued blanket condemnations of trans sense around bathroom bills, are further munity in particular. My family is always Paul Catholic Church, Tampa, Florida. individuals, occasionally citing discredited evidence of how pervasive the misunder- a bit on edge when we go out together, or marginal information sources as standing and confusion about gender constantly worried that unfriendly stares “science” to support their positions. I identity continues to be. Given the wide and remarks might escalate to a con-