Issue 837 University of Surrey Students' Union 24th February 1995 Students 'beaten up by Bouncers' at Bojangles
Two students found themselves in the Accident & Emergency department of the Royal Surrey aftealterr thetìieyy were assaulted at Boj angles Nightclub, apparently by members of diier Security staff. President forced home he two seperate incidents occured on Wednesday 9th The Home Office have forcibly returned the president of Brìghton February. Tliis was during abusy University back to his native Zimbabwe, after they refused to Tstudent night at the club, when extend his student visa. Pancho Ndebele was not granted leave to many of the University's students would have been in the club. appeal, and has been refused entry back into this country after he went abroad at Christmas. One of the students claims he was plucked mmigration offìcials cl^ that Pancho's student visa is no Icwiger valid, and that from the danceiloor, taken out of the he needs a work permit to continue acting as President of Brighton University. A building and then assaulted in a side alley. Henne Office officiai said: "Ali students are expected to go at the end of their As a result he suffered cuts and bruising Icourse, unless there are strong compassionate reasons for their remaining." NUS to the fàce. He is at present dealing with are arguing ihat there is an exemption, granted by a Home Office minister for the Police on this m^ter. immigration in 1974, whereby overseas students elected as sabbaticals may stay. Tbe Home Office, however, are claiming that there were no exemptions written into the immigration rules. ^Tbe Management of Bojanglez were at first unaware of the incident They said NUS have launched a campaign on Pancho's behalf, as they see that this decision may th^ the doorman had been dismiss^, and adversely affect other overseas students that may wish to take pan in student union that they were looking into the incident to activities. Their activities at present are: ensure that a similar event never hap- pened again. They were keen to stress that the doorman had acted of his own accord 1) Liasing closely with Brighton University Students Union on each aspectof the case and thiU it was not Bojanglez' policy to and campaign; treat their custcHners in this way. 2) Submitting an appeal to the Home office against the refusai of Pancho's leave to remain in the country and his request to re-enter as a student As far as we are aware, this is the first incident of this nature for a very long time. Students are reminded of the 3) Raising the issue with other national cM-ganisations to ensure maximum awareness. Minibus service the Union runs back from ITie NUS is meeting the Educational Minister for the first time in fifteen years, and the nightclubs to campus, and are encour- the NUS President has tabied the case for discussion; aged to use it 4) Co-ordinating press coverage so that the details and complications of this issue are h^dled sensitively. If anyone has any information on the in- cidents, they should get in touch with the NUS are hoping that this campaign can be used to highlight the appalling treatment President or Guildford Police station Pancho, and other overseas students, are receiving with regard to their visa st^us. Although an ai^)eal has been launched to allow Pancho to appeal against the ruling, Jonathan Bennett tìie speed at which these things occur may mean that Pancho's term of office will be Communicatons Officer over by the time anything is agreed.
Henzy S. Katt 2 Bare Facts Discontented Students Vote for Referendum t the Tuesday General Meeting, a mandiUe calling for a One of the most ccmtentious issues is the issue of NUS block Feferendum on the subject of disaffiliation from the purchasing agreements with national breweries. The NUS rep- NUS was passed. Students and Sabtodcals voted for the resentative insisted that the USSU could not possibly get a Areferendum after hearing various speakers slate the NUS better deal for students (Hi its own rather than with which for their inability to influence government policy. The general buys 130,000 barrels of beer per year. Other speakers argued opinicxi of most speakers was t^ the executive members of the that the present NUS agrement prev^ts the union from l^e- NUS were attempting to advance their own political careers fiting from promotional offers such as free kegs of beer, or rather than campaign on behalf of students. fM'omotional prizes. The Treasurer of the NUS, Steve Hale was at the GM to defend the NUS. He asserted that the NUS do want students to discuss Whatever your opinion is, you will have the chance to express disaffiliation, but that this should be done with students being it in term three when the referendum will be held in conjunction made aware of all the facts. On the subject of NUS repre- with the by-election. Another motion that called for twice- sentations to the government, Steve Hale mentioned the weekly yearly referenda on NUS affiliation was also passed. It seems lobbies of pailiament on issues such as further education, that mther than being setüed, the issue will now become a major disabilities and student hardship. He said "Isolation is not the part of the union agenda for a long time to come. It is the job of way forward" and wanted a united front for all students rather the NUS to provide a better service for students so they can than fragmenting student representation into the individual justify the affiliation fee of £27,000 - as someone said, we could unions of each university. buy a whole navy for the sub-aqua club with that money. g Richard Belr What does the More about the NUS mean to NUS
be main question people are asking themselves at the you? moment (Well the ones who are interested in the future discount card for the cinema? Cheap (?) drinks in the of their union,) is should the University of Surrey Union? A bunch of people fighting the Government on T disaffiliate from the National Union of Students? (NUS). everything they do but getting nowhere, holding demos that nobody takes any notice of, saying lots but I went to the GM on Tuesday, with a fairly open mind, to listen A to the arguments put for and against disaniliation. I was pleased changing nothing? We know the NUS needs change, the question is how do we to see thm NUS had taken our thre^ seriously and had sent a go about it? representative to speak to us. I had heard from one of the regional conference delegates that NUS hadn't seemed bothered when People say there are a lot of political wranglings at the top. The they were told at the regional ccmference last week. NUS needs change from the top down - THIS IS WHERE YOU COME IN. For many years I had always thought NUS and students go hand i NUS National Conference is where all the important decision inhand. V^en you had one, you had the other. Solwasshocked making takes place. It decides NUS policy, it i^jproves the to hear suggestions of disaiffiliation. But after today I can see yearly accounts, it holds last year's office accountable for the why this course of acticm has to be considered. work they have or haven't done. But most importantly of all it is when the new National Executive Committee are elected. These are the people who really run the NUS. They decide what I felt sorry for the representative frOTi NUS. It seemed to me that issues to lobby parliament on, what to campaign for, what to he had deliboately been chosen to speak to us because he shared tell the press. a lot of our opinions to do with NUS being too political and not communicative enough. I felt the only reasons he could raise If you think the NUS leaders should stop fighting each other for us not to disaffiliate were to do with beer subsidies. I am and start fighting for us, this is where to start. afraid not being a beer drinker this carried no weight with me. USSU's NUS Conference delegation has two spare places. I am already going, and so is Heather Stych (delegation leader) I think possibly within our union there are different motivations and Jono Bennett The conference is in Blackpool, fr(»n 27th for dis^filiatmg from NUS. I felt some people wanted to take a - 30th March, that's the second week of the Easter holidays, stand over the issue that NUS fails to appropri^ly represent and we will pay all your fees and travel costs. students, by voting with their feet, ie. "If you don't change your policies we'll disaffiliate". Whereas others are just simply look- If you want to stand for election as a delegate and change the ing for ways to improve the situation for students here at Surrey, way NUS is run, go and see Manoj (the President) fcR* an ie. we have better ways to spend 27 thousand pounds. application fonn, which needs to be returned to Manoj by Monday. You will need 5 people to propose and guarantee you, and you will need to make a s^rt speech at the Hustings, which Whatever your reason for disaffiliation 1 feel it is very important will be at next week's GM. that you take part in the referendum. Its Uie only way the union knows if it is respcHiding to the m^ority opinion. Andy Renshaw External Affairs Officer Antonia Ba^iias 24th February 1995 Do i Part-time anId CMual w^^^t 2 ]0|) available fromn thtbe Job-ShoJob-Shop» I at the Helpdesk Wednesday npiii-2pm Students' Union Can Bar Come and see what's on offer
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i li Pop in to see the Vice-President in the Students' Union or ring and Ridse money for charity leave a message on ext. 9228 gidt for; National No Smoking Day WHAT ELSE WILL YOU Wed. 8th March BE WRITING ON YOUR Collect your sponsorship form CV? from any Union Sabbatical Bare Facts Are you getting the message? STEP BACK IN TIME. ver sat in a lecture and üiou^t to yourself 'What on earth is she/be going on 1 YEAR AGO. about?* . Back to Mars with you if you haven't because 99% of us here Humanoids have, at numerous stages of our university career been engulfed Figures published by the Department for by a wrath of doom as we've sat in lectures, isola¿d and panic-stricken, Education reveal that over one million E loans have been taken out during tbe three despondently asking ourselves over and over ; Why me? Why is it always only me who doesn't understand?. years since tbe scheme was launched. Do not despair, I bring solace for üiose of you who have been honest enough to confess Hie vote for the homosexual age of con- a personality by admitting to being less than an Academic superstar. A solace which sent was lowered to 18 by a large maj wity. ccmstitutes letting you in on a little secret; The Higher Education Funding Council, Personal-"Mr Flute Man, Compton,bow's a government quango, is setting aside £3 million in 1996 to improve the teaching tbe (so far unsuccessful) attempt to sbag methods of thousands of lecturers who have been in their jobs for years. But what kind of solace can be gleaned from being told that lecturer's teaching standards are tbe green haired bud then?" not up to scratch? This, after all, does seem to be the picture being paint»! by the nVE YEARS AGO. Council as they aim to develop ways of spreading good teaching practice outside of the Universities who conventionally manage their own affairs. Laura Miller, the then VP, complained about tbe article in the previous weeks Such methods include encouraging lecturers to attend road shows and training days Bare Facts entitled"Laura Miller In Hot within their particular institutions. These would be run by academics who although Sex R«np With Alien!" specialising in the same fields would be from other Universities where they appear to be doing their job better. Effectively such methods are sending lecturers back to The Womcns Officer wrote about tbe anti- sdiool' to learn from top academics whose departments have been rated excellent by pom campaign launched by the NUS the Council for teadiing methods. Womens Campai^ to stop W H Smiths selling "tc^ sbelf pornography." Looks Moreover, lecturer's 'Dry as dust* teaching techniques are being attributed to the like they ffUled. simple fact that some have been teaching for so long they have fallen into a rut, whereby they give lectures as if on autcxnatic pilot. Indeed students here at Surrey Personal-" Yes pancake batter only acts as supported this claim stating that sometimes lecturers appeared to be * ..doing no mcM^ a sp^micide when between 10 and 20 than reciting old lectures..' . And that perhaps if the LecUu^r displayed a bit of degrees." personality a better time could be had by all! TEN YEARS AGO. Solace, therefore, can be taken from a justifiable shift of blame offering the perfect solutic» to why lectures are not und^tood. Eureka! At last, substan^ evidrace Ramsey Tayman complains about the lack exists with which students can proove what they have known for years.. that ultimatly of mirrors in Catb Court as be fìnds it ,without doubt or deception, C(xnplete responsibiU^ for our academic failings lies in difficult as he needs plen^ of time to the communicative capabilities of the most knowledgeable of them all, our noble perfect his appearance and to befaoM bis Lecturers! masculinity to the full. Pcrsonal-''Please wipe your bum bef«« Vanessa McCombe. the next moonie Miles!" A BED OF ROSES..? Goinq Places s the search for off site accommodaticm continues the focus of problems on campus has decreased. Recently the Vice Chancellor recieved a letter from a rather An Fxhibiikm ««f THTU' work of ML-^Ninnary SÍKÜCQCS lu the disgruntled final year music student complaining about mfxiuii Wftfld ATwyford Court. Twyford Court? You may wonder what problems are faced m the newest court on campus; yet you will be surprised. The noise from the building wo-k makes study virtually impossible, bad kitchen lighting, the fridge going off Thiirsdây 2iid March two or three times a week, a dodgy phone and so the list goes 10 am to 4 pm future Theatre Concourse on. Although a generous 50% of Surrey students are accommodated on campus, it is clearly not problem free. fliL* work nu.<^ioiur> sucictii^« in CHir mtxk*m woriil Do other universities have such problems? Well, Diane Legg extri^incly \dnaJ A mLs^ttmary is no Kin{!cr just A V><;H of Portsmouth University Accommodation Office says th^ out inc.uitiii Cïin&u.u) a-ashing throajsb um*xp)on>l jungle m of the 14,000 Portsmouth suidents, only 1400 are accoomio- s(.'
THESIS OR DISSERTATION WRITING? HELP IS AT HAND! How can you help me? We offer a course of 10 x fifty minute periods (one period per week) which is specially designed to help students preparing to write a thesis or dissertation. It takes you Information and through the range of writing, study and research skills needed so that you have the Helpline service tools to tackle the task with greater confidence and accuracy. When does this course take place? 8pm - 8am In term 3 only. Class times and dates are available from the English Language Institute (ELI) generad office on the first floor of the Nodus Centre (via the side entrance). Phone ext. 4949 Who is eligible to attend? The couree is open to postgraduate students and to final year undergraduate students. Between Wey and It is equally suitable for non-native speakers (whose fu-st language is not English) and Wandle in Surrey Court for native speakers (whose first language is English). Will it cost me anything? The course is free to most students currently registered on degree courses in the Dear Editor University of Surrey. If in any doubt, please ask at the ELI office. Regarding the ACC Telephone cards How can I enrol on the course? mentioned last week by Phil Goddard, it is possible to get a similar card which If you want tt)joi n this course, you should come to the ELI office (Nodus Centre, 1/F, works from the phones at Hazel Farm. side entrance) and sign on the class lists before the end of term 2. The card in question is the Mercury Call- Is any tutorial support available later? ing Card, which is cheaper (according to Mercury) than the BT payphone, though A limited amount of help is available during part of the summer vacation but ONLY I don't know hot it compares with the to students who have attended AIX of the Thesis/Dissertation Writing course. ACC Card, the Mercury card works from any phone» and the accommodation office What can the ELI NOT do? hold application forms for these cards 1.Writc or rewrite your thesis or dissertation for you! Nigel Ha^en 2.Read or check or correct your thesis or dissertation if you have NOT attended the course! 8 Bare Facts tongue-in-cheek style. The guitar frenzy that is the substantial ALBUM REVIEWS mix of 'Bang Your Head* kicks the proverbiai bottom and deserves constant dancefloor attention for ever, at least A bit ALBUM OF THE WEEK like Harold Meaker's bat I suppose.
VARIOUS ARTISTS:Natural Born Killers (OST) Oliver Stone's upcoming controversial flick 'Natural Born Killers' will take millions if this genre-busting Soundtrack is anything to go by. The question of violence and mass killings can't be ignored as it's full of atmospheric dialogue (not dis- similar to 'Reservoir Dogs' soundtradc) whid) runs into the tracks, so for example you get Julliette Lewis going OD about killing j ust as Pasty Cline starts singing "I'm Back In My Baby's Arms". It's very weird. Blended in with the dialogue you get a stunning mix of music, r^ (Dr Dre, Da Dogg Pound), world aitists (Peto* Gabriel), singer songwrito^ (LÓi Cohoi, Bob Dylan, Pattie Smith, Pasty Cline if you please), rock (L7t Cowboy Junkies), and industrial (Nine Inch Nails,( wbose Trent Reznor produced the album) and Lard). It's an excellent album witb something to whet anybo- dy's appetite, despite being a bit scaiy in places but (¿es hâve a full sex scrae recorded on the c.d which is quite a good idea, if you like that sort of thing. I bet Harold Meaker would enjoy it VARIOUS ARTISTS:Fimkjazztìcal Tricknology (Ninja Tiine) Has to have the silliest name for an album ev^, and it's very tricky to say when your pissed, so l'm told. Ninja Tune have brought toge^er amixture of contem- porary jazz based dance music firom artists on their Gravediggaz 1^1, such as DJ Food, and Coldcut, who provide most of the stand out tracks on this album, but other than that theres SINGLE OF THE WEEK (2) not much else to get it gcnng. SALAD:Driiik The Elixir (Island Red) Weighing in at 75 minutes, it' s abit of a l(»ig slog and after about Ihey Sit scofïing ice cream and slurping expensive œffee on 39 I was mene interested in toasting myself some crumpets, the sleeve, looking ratho* pHizzled at how they really got thm, oozing widi butter and melted cheese, and I oijoyed them more. but still IcK^ like they're having lots of fun. So it' s a Tim Claypole for my crumpets but a Miss Poppov for Funkjazztical Whateveritis. Thy are Salad also known as the best Anglo-Dutch band in existence loved by pop kids everywhere because of a few exquisite singles, and for having a former model/MTV prés- SINGLE REVIEWS enter as a singer. Salad's essence remains the same: heartfelt pop nuggets that SINGLE OF THE WEEK (1) suggest lives cluttered with failed romances, obsession and GRAVEDIGGAZ:Sìx Feet Deep E.P (Gee Street) alcohoUsm. 'Drink The Elixir' is a soaring pop masterpiece Seething hip hop at it's very finest from this New YCHIC group, that walks ail over fellow post-Pixies bands such as Belly and showing the two sides of the Amalean Hip Hop scrae. The ñrst Veruca Salt's latest effc^. Salad have yet again made a track 'Suicide' ambles along nicely on a par with Ice Cube, wonderful single and a the fbrthcoming album Iodes promi- telling about ali the gangland goings-on in that big urban jungle sing. As did Harold Meaker's career, imtil some saddo took that is America. It cambines (^vediggaz unique style of rapping RentaghostoffT.V. with a melodie beai JEFF BUCKLEYrGrace (Epie) 'Bang Your Head' is completely différent, in fact taking the piss Sony's latest plan to reap more in money involves Mr. Buck- out of Ice Cube and fellow gangstas by swearing loads in a ley, this single and the re-issuing of his debut album which is also called 'Grâce*. Unfortunately, Sc»y will not make big The Marking Schema bucks out of Jeff because the poor lamb doesn't know if he's batting or bowling. Half the time be comes across as a really 5 • Timothy Claypole good smger and guitarist, but thra when be reaches the chorus be sounds like he's tiying to be the next Lenny Kravitz, all 4 - Harold Meaker whispery and lovey- Doors open at 7.30 p.m. Quiz starts at 8.00 p.m. oac sa pF^izes Main Union +o be won Free Entry TOAVOIDDISAPPOINIENTGETTHEREEARLY standard English Breakfast £1.00 ìe Orientai GÉkenPb Doublé English Breakfast £1.95 The Big Breakfast £1.95 f •'33/ SftMtVìda Meat Curry+Rice £2.00 Also available: ThaiVcgCuny+Ricc £2.00 Monday to Friday 8.30 a.in. to 10.30 a.in. PHONE EXTENSION 3444 WEEK ENDING FRIDAY 3RD MARCH 1995 Friday 24th Saturday 25th HOEDOWN ID SPORTS DISCO The Friday Night Out 8-2am Students' Union 8-2am Union Lounge £1 entry on the door Come early or be disappointed FREE ENTRY Sunday 26th Monday 27th FREE BANDS Ouiz Mite Senseless ITiIngs, JKC Acoustics Lx>wer Bar 7.30pm & Minxus QUIZ Sl^RTS AT 8pm SHOW starts S.OOpm. OFU film - OFU Film - 'Forrest Gump' 'Forrest Gump' LTG 8pm LfG 5pm, 8pm Tuesday 28th Wednesday 1 st Mar Folk Club Comedy Night featuring 8-11pmL0WERBAR Sean i-ock 8-1 1 pm LOWER BAR £2 entry, NBA £1 a bottle Thursday 2nd Friday 3rd No \X/ave HOEDOWN feat live on stage CABLE & BONE BAND The Friday Night Out 9-2am LOWER BAR 8-2afn MAiN UNION £2 on the door £1 on the door FORTHCOMINO EVENTS March I Ith UOS Club presents March Madness March ]7th End of term Disco with ù LEWIS 24tii February 1995 11 Laughter Lines 'Rad (ish)' nother week, another evening in the lower bar and the Avalon Salad, Student's Union, Sunday February 19,1995 comedians. Last week saw Bill Bailey, Julian Barrett and Phil Golly gosh. Big crowd tonight. Obviously Salad's reputation precedes them ADavey hit the lower bar with an amusing - indeed, so far I have only heard good things about this lot Apparently, the and often hilarious set The top act of the lead singer used to be a VJ cm MIV, and has sinœ quit to exploit her real line up, Bill Bailey, performed a version talent Strange, because the usual route in this case is the other way round of Led Zepplin's "Stairway to Heaven" from this - p^formers rrálise they have no talent and so become VJs c«i MTV... Paul that most people won't forget in huiry and King come on down ! Anyway, I digress. as for the Clash's "Should I Stay or Salad come on to confront an expectant but nevertheless boisterous crowd. The four Should I go"! The humour was very of them quickly launch into the fírst song... and after sorting out some initial teething student orientated and went down very troubles, produce an extremely impressive sound. For just a guitar, bass, dnmis and nicely thank you. The compare Phil occasion^ keyboard. Salad have a very big sound. I don't mean just loud (cos it was Davey was also superb and d^rved an that as well), but full and well defmed. The singer, snake hii^)ed and gorgeous, raises Oscar for his treatment of hecklers. His the temperature and blood pressure of many a punter - especially the blokes - so much description of drivers in the south was so one hairy palmed individual in ear shot of your (almost) PC reviewer is moved to funny and also frighteningly accurate. ask for Üiat often requested, but rarely performed number, 'Get Yer Tits Out'. Oh dear Julian Bairett was novel. All in all one of oh dear. Hcmestly. I have heard that there is, in town, a retail outlet that (^s in lives the better nights out in the lower bar I for - go get one. You know who you are. one enjoyed it Anyway, Salad progress with their set which consists of a pretty impressive collection So what's on this week of pop ditties. Starting out with a few quirky, bouncy, pt^py numbere, the smger exudes an air of capti vatingly cheeky sexiness; 'Kiss My Love' she implores... oooer. In the lower bar on Wednesday 1st March As the set moves on, the songs get heavier, more aggressive - as the rather energetic the Avalon ccanedy network features the pit of the sidebumed untucked T-shirt brighe at the front ably demcHistrate. Mid way superb Sean Lock and Helen Austin a into the set the singer suddenly becomes even more endearing. After introducing one night not to be missed! Tickets:£2 show song, that voice suddenly seems very familiar. Well I never, its Queenie from starts 8.30 pm. At Guildford Civic hall on BlackAdder 2.1 was expecting the next introduction to go something like "This next Thursday and Friday, 23rd & 24lh March, song is about poniesOocA too cute. Roy "Chubby" Brown returns for two nights of X rated comedy. Tickets:£ 12.50 Salad were great Even got an encore ! Very rare for this place, that is. They have the show starts at 7.30 pm. lo(^, the style, the talent and most impoitantly decent songs. On reflection, I have decided to remove the 'ish' from my headline... Salad were totally rad. Hmmm, hang Th^'s about it for this week, a bit thin but on a moment nobody says that any more, do they. Drat Sean Lock should make up for it GUILDFORD 95 international Universi^ Court MUSIC FESTIVAL 3rd to 24th March 1995 Booze Cruise Saturday 11th March Patrons Sir Georg SoltiKBE Phil Collins £15 Guildford's Third Music Festival, including coach wKh pianists, orchestras, string quartets, film music, world premières, contemporary music, jazz, early music - In fact, something for almost everyone! to and from Artists and events include: France and the feny Tasmin Little. European Community Chamber Orchestra, Cécile Ousset, Nikolai Demidenko, young artists. All ^3rment8 are to be in by Friday 3id March Mayumi Seller, Joanna MacGregor, Morris dancing and music, to ^ Hamerton's postrox in Stag Hill Guidlford Choral Society with the Philharmonia Orchestra, Reception. Cheques to be ntade payable to local choral and instrumental groups, a Gershwin celebration, University Court Committee in an envelope the Takacs and Chilingirian String Quartets. with your name and address on the back Guildford Philharmonic Orchestra, talks, seminars, exhibitions, music for the under-Ss and much more! Departure times will be For a Tree brochure listing all events call the Festival Box Office: confWied In later notices 01483 444008 Passports needed 12 Bare Facts University Expansion West Side Story Can you imagine 500 people in your lecture? Plans to increase student numb^ to eniable 40% of school-leavers by the year A show "previously considered too ambitious for a small, 2000 may mean a German style form of education. The Com- student-run society". How wrong could you be? A mittee of Vice-Chancellors and Principals of tbe Universities of spectacular and eoüiusiastic week of performances was the United Kingdom wants to remove tbe cap on university the result of months of hard woik and planning by places within a year and allow an annual rise of new undo'grad- members of the Gilbert and Sullivan Society. Hie cast gave all uates. The 5% quota will belong to the past and make univo^ities to produce a show so full of life, in songs, speech, and dance places c^n to many ambitious school-leav^ who previously scenes, while those hidden behind Üie scenes also gave it all they might have been rejected. The (JV(jp report emprises the bad. You w^e no longer sat in a converted h^ - you were importance of univo^ity education since it is vital to meet the transported to 1950's New York! challenges of scientific and technological advances for compet- ing on a global stage. Th^fn^ it is necessary to equip people A special mention must go to the fmal performance which, as for life-k)ng learning, making them able to keep pace with the has really become traditicmal, saw one or two ad lib. additicHis rapid changes of new developments and prepare them for a to soipt and storyline. Officer Krupke suddenly develq)ed a successful career. Dr. Edward, CVC!P chairman, stresses the strong Cockney accent, and judging by the smothered giggles importance of 'a national commitment to higher education, not from the off-st^e cast, it was well appreciated (hopefully none the stergo of recent years. As a nation, we owe it to ourselves of the audience noticed the extra off-stage sound eßects!) One to increase the opportunity for university education*. sc^e involved a juke box, which was supposed to emit Mambo The committee calls for diversity within and between the univer- music, but instead we heard strains of the Muppets theme tune. sities. The ties between British universities should be thoroughly Hmmm... reinforced and the present competition should be transformed into successful collaboration to contribute to national prosperity. ' Most noticeable to the audience, though, must have been the The CVC^ is aware that the expansion of educatìrai h^ to te use CHI the final night of a stage pistol containing 9mm blanks properly funded. However the question is if the universities will - rather more deafening than most expected. Unfortun^ly, get tbe necessary resources from the govermnrat or industry. no-one thought to mention this beforehand to the two crew It is very important for the United Kingdom to take the right steps niiembers operating (he follow-spots, so for a few seconds now, to prevent a university syston such as in Germany, with afterwards the spoüight beams wobbled a little! hardly any restricticm on higher education. Tbe consequence would be lecture theatres with more than 500 students, no ] myself was lucky enough to become involved in the produc- personal contacts with your lecturers, all of whidi would r^ult tion, albeit at the last minute due to a shortage of stage-hands. in the loss of the high quality and values of the British university I expected to enjoy myself, but the sheer exhilaration of work- teaching system. ing (even backstage) in such a brilliant performance is some- th^g that just cannot be described. Elena Latta I will mention no names here, because if I did I would have to menticMi every single person involved (which would get ex- University of Surrey tremely boring!). I will just say well done to all of you: cast, crew, orchestra, and the various directors who wwked together Symphony Orchestra & Choir to produce such a spectacular show. with Banstead Musical Society Sue Nonuan Sahirday 25 February 1995,7.30 pm Guildford Cathedral Folk Club by kind permission of Ihc Dam £r Chapter Thanks to everyone that turned up to see Gilly Darbey last time - a night that no one should have missed with Gilly's stunning voice put to many well known songs and loads of Floor Singers - especially "Bcä)"(?) who sang with Gilly, even if a little Igar unexpectedly!! The next Folk Club is Tuesday Week 8 (28th Feb) and the Act The Dream of is IVOR GAME. Ivor played last year on the Acoustic Stage at E the Guildford Folk and Blues Festival (next one is August Bank Geroiitius Holiday Weekend!) and will bring to us a mixture of 'soft folk/rock' so p lease come down to the Lower Bar on Tuesday for an 8|mi start Jennifer Higgins mezzo-soprano Remember anybody turning up before 8pm will get in for Richard Braebrook tenor FREE!! John Noble bass Conductor Nicholas Coman FIOOT Singers are welcome at any Folk Club evening, just turn up at about 7:30pm to get a spot Please note that if anybody wants to play on the main stage when Jc^n Ocway is here in Week Ten (Tues) they must let me know at this coming Folk Admission by programme £6 (concessions £4) Club, OK? from the Music Department (259317), and the See you Tuesday in the Lower Bar, Cheers, Information Centre, Senate House (259905) This concert is prexnteii by the Uiiioersily's Deport nieitt of Music Duncan. 24tii February 1995 13 NBK = Noisy, Brash, Kinetic A review of NATURAL BORN KILLERS Imagine being locked in a room with a television playing at full into submission and hits home ail bis points with ail tbe subtlety volume and someone incessantly Qicking througb all 32 Chan- of and English footbaU hooligan. Just about every character is nels of American rubbish. TTïat's what sitting through "Natural Sick and depraved but, unfortunately, while our eyes and ears Bora Killers" is lüce. A deafening kaléidoscope of diff«-ent are battered, the mind is never really involved. Tbe images flash images and sounds that assault tbe senses but, eventually, make by so quickly that there' s not much time to be bored, but neither some sort of comment about the culture that created them. is there much time to care about anything. Aft^ a few minutes of someone shouting at you, it's hard to care very much about If any film was guaranteed to give you a headache it's this one. anything. As director, Oliver Stone (wbose previous crédits include "JFK", "Platoon" and "The Doors") has tried to make "A Qodc- However, tbe set pieces, including a very violent jwison riot, are work Orange" for the 1990s. A controversial, bleak and savage supeibly staged and the whole film is clearly the work of amajor, satire dealing with violence and the media's respcmse to it The angry, brave (but possibly confused) film-maker (whose cine- resuit is oveikill. m^gr^her and ^itors certainly des^e an awards, if only for ^^^ using so many Consequently, be- ^^H différent types of c^se of its explicit media and putting violence, this fìlm them together m bas already gained such an original notoriety. It was way). The Sound- due to ^ released track is also last year, but then, superb. in a Publicity man's dream, was (very te- Although Woody nuously) linked to Harrelson plays somemurders. Asa his role as resuit some, if not tongue-in-cheek ail, of this country's and ov^ the top, great and oh-so- most of theactors liberal tabloid are subsumed by 'newsp^)ers' called the editing andef- for it to be banned fects, although outrighL In fact, its Tommy Lee release date was Jones is always held up until the good and Robert hysteria had died Downey Jr has down. great fun as a real slimeball TV an- Now it has fmally been released, as expected, it's hard to see chonnan on "American Maniacs" - a show so sick and exploi- what ail tbe fiiss was abouL tative that it's frighteningly close to the truth. And that, in a The film is split exactly in two. The firsthou r deals with Mickey confused way, is among the points Stone hammers home time and MaUory, two young lovers oa the nin and killing just about and again (normally with all tbe subtlety of a sledgehammer) - eveiyone they meet, and how the media tums them into cuit violence and the media' s love of it, coupled with TV' s ability to figures • so f^", ifs no more than a rehash of Terrence Malick's make stars out of sickos and the American public's love of far superior "Badlands". The second half, however, deals with true-life crime, have a lot to answer for. their time in the State Penitentiary (run by warden Tommy Lee Jemes) and how the media helps cause a prison riot and aids their One into^ting fact is that, flavour of tbe decade, Quratin escape. (For a much better prison film see the forthcoming Tarantino is associated with the film. Tbe directe of "Res^oir "Shawshank Redemption".) Dogs" and "Pulp Fiction" wrote the original screenplay years ago. It was picked up again when he became famous, only to However, the story isn't the reason to see this film. It's not be - seemingly - completely re-written. Consequently, it's hard exactly easy viewing - mea^ violence is certainly not everyo- to know quite how the finished fïbn compares with Taiantino's ne* s idea of 'enteitainment' - but tbe movie is stunningly inven- vision. Every now and then, someone starts some dialogue that tive in the way it's put together. Oliver Sterne is a virtuoso at sounds as if it migbt be one of Tarantino's interminable this and uses every trick in the book (and even invrats afew new speeches, but it nev^ lasts. Also, the film could have benefited ones) to make this feel like tbe ultimate violent balludnogenic from some of the 'Wunderkind's' humour. However, there is bad trip. Video, filters, back projection, super 8 mm, even tbe obligatory Tarantino-esque Mexican stand-off towards the animation, are used, often janingly, to «"eate a disorientating end. and disturbing collision of images, to give a distorted glimpse of today's culture. Many images are familiar - from a beating It's interesting to speculai what Tarantino might bave made of obviously based on the Rodney King case, tothefuzzypictures bis own script - certainly not this. But, Stone bas reportedly of crimináis cíq)tured on security campas. halted the publication of Quentin's original scre^play so it's difficult to know what changes have been made. It is an attack on TV and the générations who mindlessly watch Fmally, seeing Woody as a shaven-headed psycho, meirily it, and even includes a pastiche of an "I Love Lucy" type show, blowing people away with a pump-action shotgun means th¿ bere about child abuse, complete with canned laughter in ail the "Cheers" will never be the same again. wrong places. Qever? Yes. Sick? Probably. Subtle? No, not really. Phn Watching the film is a roUer-coaster ride of sound and images, c(xnplete sensory ovCTload for two hours as Stone batters you 14 Bare Facts The Video Box ***** Better ihan sex. **** A stonker. *** The eaith didn't move. ** I siepi through iL * Load of w*nk. True Lies (15) **** 141 mins, Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Jamie Lee Curtís, Art Malik, Tom Arnold. Dir. James Cameron. SchwarzeneggCT retums to forai with this stomping action-packed spy adventure helmed by Teraiinator, T2 and Aliens director, James Cameron. Harry Tasker appears to be duU workaholic businessman, at least that's what his wife (Cuitis) and daughter think, but in reality (if you can cali it reality) be's a tough, resourceful Seaet Agent who makes James Bond look like Thora Hird. Tasker becomes involved in tr^ng to quash an arms smuggling ring lead by evil Aziz (Art Malik). Meanwhile wifey has become involved with a used-car salesman who Claims to be a secret agent, and even Claims responsibility for some of Task^'s own escodes. HopefuUy, Schwarzenegger has fînally cottoned on to the fact that he can* t make pecóle laugh (e.g. the woefully unfunny ûist Action Hm)), and that his bric^-$h*thouse physique will c»ly ever be at home in O.T.T. action movies, and they don't come much more O.T.T. than this. Here Roseanne's hubby, Tom Arnold, provides the comedy while Amie does what he does best - blowing pecóle apart - while C^ameron strings together a dazzling array of well staged set-pieces and stunt-wnlc (with an especially silly finale). So what if the plot (partly borrowed frcm La Totale!) is only a feeble and slightly masogonistìc excuse to string together impressive action scenes. Nevo* mind logie • feel the budget. NB. Although rumoured to almost lose an entire scene to the hack-hai^y censor James Fennan, True Lies has been released with only a few seconds of cuts. Wolf (15) ** 25 mìns, Starring Jack Nicholson, Michelle Pfeiffer, James Spader, Christopher Plummer. Dir. Mike Nichols. In a complete reversai of Nicho^' Regarding Henry, in which a lawyo* was shot in the head and so became a human being, Wolf is about a has-been soon-to-be-replaced Publishing exec (Nicholson) who is bitten by a Wolf, and quickly fmds that he is now able to reverse the recent trend of bis career and become a go-getting corporate b*st*rd. Along the way he also manages to ineet and form a bond with Michelle Pfeiffer, who is the overindulged daughter of his boss. However ali of this success is certainly starting to ruffle scmebody's fur, and soon pecóle are dying in droves around them. It has been said that if you took away the werewolf part of the story you would be left with an interesting look at corporale culture in the US. Personaüy I consider this aspect of the story too facile and cUched to be considered a saving grace, as it has ali been done before, and done much better in films like Glengairy Glen Ross and even the fairly unmemorable Working Girl (also directed by Mike Nichols). As for the wwewolf part, there is absolutely no sense of tension, danger or horror - even Hammer were lutter than this. I also ought to remind the makeup artist that yak hair on the jowls doesn't cut it anymore - has Rick Baker forgotten the incredible job be did on American Werewolf in London? OFU for dimwits his week^s films are going to be very popular so let me Win Tickets for start by reminding you that for legai reasons we (ÜAN NOT seil tickets on the door. Tickets can be bought in Natural Born Tadvance firom the trading (tesk (£2) or you can reserve with the house officer upto one hour before the film starts and then coUect them at the door (£2.50 for OFU, £2.25 for Arts Cinema). Killers The film which has received plenty of Oscar ncMninations - Forrest Gump - is OFU's Ottering this week (LTG Sun 5pm, We have four pairs of ticketsfor 8pm & Mon 8pm). With Tom Hanks as a simpleton who is unwittingly involved in just about ali of the major recent the film and fourl-shirtsto give American events, it illustrâtes the fact that you don't need a degree to succeed in Ufe. Isn't that a relief? So if you've got away if you can answer this exams looming then chea' yourself up with this very flinny film question: - but tura up early to pick your seat. Red squirrels used to be a common sight in Britain until the What Series did Woody American grey squirrel was introduced, reducing the number of hazebìuts and Nestle Güsters lying around and starving our Harrelson used to star in? red friends. These Americans rain everything. Despite being called Red Squirrel, this week's Arts Cinema film (LTG Weds Answers in the Bare Facts box in 8pm) has very little to do with the blighters. A suicidai young man is the Union Foyer, by Mid-day on intenupted by an amnesia suffering Tuesday. young lady who be ccmvinces is his girl friend of four years. Having whisked her away to ¿e Red Squirrel Remember to include your Nanne campsite (aba...) he réalisés that ber and Union Number on your entry. distuibed past means he has bitten off more than he can chew. 24th February 1995 ODEON, EPSOM ROAD Enquiries/Credit Card bookings: Guildford 578017. Advance Box Office open 2pm - 7pm. Student Discount available Mon-Thurs before 7pm (with NUS or ISIC card only). Screen 1 : NATURAL BORN KILLERS (18) See review Fri/Sun-Thurs 2.15 5.15 8.00 Sat 2.00 5.00 7.45 10.20 Screen 2 : RUDYARD KIPLING'S THE JUNGLE BOOK (PG) Bearing as much relation to Kipling's original as Disney's animated version (i.e. not a lot), this kids adventure isn't at all bad but certainly isn't great. Starring Jason Scott Lee as Mowgli, a host of animals, and Gary Elwes as a sneery baddie, this is more like a sub-standard Indiana Jones film. However, it's relatively enjoyable half-term fodder, even if only to hear John Cleese talk about "Ibe bare necessities'. Fri and Sun 1.10 3.45 Sat 12.55 3.15 LEON (18) Style, wit, humour and violence are mixed together by French director Luc Besson, making his first Hollywood film. In (some ways it's areprise of his "Nikita", with a young girl being trained as an assassin. Here, however, the girl is 12 years old and is being taught by ice-cool master hit-man, or 'cleaner', Jean Reno (who also played a 'cleaner' in "Nikita"). The plot doesn't hold up to much scrutiny (this fihn must have the most underpopulated Police station in movie history, and why is French star Reno described as an Italian?) yet these points don't seem to matter. The thing moves at a brisk pace, gives a fresh look at New York and just feels, well, French. The relationships and set-piece battles are all neatly done and, of course, it helps to have Gary Oldman and as a really nasty piece of work. It's good to see a European director showing Hollywood how a really average pl(H can be transcended. Fri and Sun 6.10 8.50 Sat 530 8.00 10.30 Mon-Tburs 1.15 3.45 6.10 8.50 Screen 3 : STAR TREK - GENERATIONS (PG) Of the Star Trek Movies so far, this is arguably seventh out of seven. Which is a shame because this is the one where the old guard hand over to the Next Generation. Unfortunately though, for anyone not an avid Trekkie, it's just dull. The Next Generation crew are a pretty humourless lot anyway, and wh^ little humour there is bere is very forced. The plot is not really worth describing and only William Shatner seems to remember Üi^ Star Trek movies should be tongue in cheek. Let's hope Picard and his team get a better script next time. As one Wilfully Tirescnne person put it, 'Star Trek - Degenerations'. Oh yes, and shouldn't the lOSigons speak, well, Kling LADIES RUGBY AGM, Friday 24th February (week 7), at "MATHURA MALI" - Tamil Cultural night arranged on 5.30pm in ChanceUors. MEMBERS PLEASE ATTEND. Wednesday March 15th (week 10) at 6.30pm to 12.30pm in Do you play the Clarinet? Come for a blow Wednesdays Hall. Students who can give Tamil programs please contact the 6.45pm, TB19 Vie« President of the Sri Lankan Society. MUSIC SOCIETY AGM, Wednesday of week 8 at 2pm in the WINDSURFING CLUB AGM on the 19th March (Week IO) ChanceUors. Ali those involved please be there. M 7.3(^jm in the Nelson Mandela room. AH Welcome. Don't forget sailing evcery weekend. Come to the meetings on Fri at LADIES HOCKEY CLUB AGM, Tuesday 28th Februaiy at Ipm in the union by the snodcer tables. Leave a note in the 8pm in the Varsity Centre. pigeonhole or {^one John ext 9543. CREATIVE WRITING SOC, The trip to the Ram has been MENS HOCKEY CLUB AGM - on 7th March (week 9) in the changed to Friday 24th February. Meet in the Union Foyer at Varsity Centre at S.OOpm. 7.30pm. Everybody is welcome. WOMENS FOOTBALL AGM - on Friday 3rd of March at KARTING CLUB AGM, Tuesday 28th February, at 7pm in 7pm in ChanceUors. Ali members need to attend. Pub crawl _ ^^ ChanceUors. afterwards. METHSOC - Meetings are now being held in Com- What are ewe doing on Friday night? Get slaughtered at The ^^ ^ mittee room Y of Senate House on Tbursdays at 6 pm Ram with the Creative Writing Society. Meat at the Upper Baa \ - This will continue until the end of term. at 7pm. Don't be fleeced, don't be sbe^ish: dip into shear fun. BADMINTON CLUB AGM-Tuesday 7th March at A lamb excuse for an udder piss up, butt wool worth it. 7.30 pm in the Nelson Mandella Roc«n. Please come SKI CLUB AGM on the 8th March at7.30pm in TB18, Bring ^ J along as elections for next years committee will take a friend! W^V place. PLAYSOC AGM - Wednesday Week 10, 1-2 pm in Nelson LADIES RUGBY - We want you ! Come along for the Mandela Room. Everyone to ¿Utend. expCTience *?@ Training Saturdays ai the Varsity centre Be there by 11 am. Hangovers essential!!! Glidiiig C ]ul> Eastcr Trip RIDING CLUB AGM to be held on Wednesday 8th March after riding in the Nelson Mandela room at RidgC'SOjriDjz cvcnt at Ixjng Myiid iiear Shniwsbuiy from 3.45pm. .Sdtiirday ISUi ut Suiukiy Apiil 1905 Appnutm:iie Co!»l5 SRI LANKAN SOCIETY GM - on Wednesday for I wcck K £10(> irkliuim^ htmk'nnm acctvnuUuion. jihd- March Ist (week 8) at 6.30pm. ìng f(.Ts. Um^ und dnnk t»si.s ira»hpiirt tu he Hirangaì dc- pciidjnl mi numbers rXipositfc rcquircd ASAPw funberdclatU PLAYSOC meeting - Wednesday week 8, l-2pm (cme (0 CUI »cxt moctinjK iu k\iua* lliciitre K oii luei>da> Nelson Mandela Room. EverycMie interested please eviruiiig ai 6pm or uniUici Jusuu via the glhimg club pigLtm attend. 18 Bare Facts KNIGHTS GET STUNG! The Surrey throwing tbe ball to a Stingers won their disappointed Marco second game in "I can catch them" succession last Halper; New-found Sunday 19th Fe- Centre Dave "I'm bruary, 16-0. This going home to play time the (unfortu- for Michigan State nate) rivals were and then the Detroit the Reading Lions (on Helium)" Knights. Roberts using all his expertise to remem- The Stingers still ber what tbe soap with their 14 man count was on. And fi- squad plus a few nally Marios Deme- ghosts from the triou with his 4 yard past kicked off to powering run for Sur- the Knights, who rey's second touch- returned tbe ball "a down. This time bit". On the first Surrey managed to drive of the game, get tbe two point con- Surrey's defence version with Puma completely pum- running tbe ball in melled Reading's from the 3 yard line. offence to a m^or (What will we do loss of yards giv- without you?). Dur- ing Surrey the ball ing all this excitement bäck. Sometime the clock ran cmt and later Marios the Surrey Stingers won their final game of the 1994/5 season Demetriou ran the ball into tbe endzone for a touchdown which 16-0. was disallowed because of a foul oa a leading player (appar- ently, Puma helped him study tbe ground, closely!). Hie rest of Hie Surrey Stingers would like to thank their che^leading tbe half saw Surrey within 10 yards of the Reading eaá- squad fcv all tbeir support So thanks to Nia, Penny and Qiris zcme, a numbo* of times. However no touchdown came. In the P^ (General Manager) for waving your pom pons!! Yankie end James Lizars (one of tbe ghosts) couldn't stand tbe (M) would like to thank tbe team for showing him how to use a score line and blocked a Reading punt Tbe ball bounced into tin-op^tf. Myself, JD would like to th^ those who have their endzone, thus giving Surrey a 2 point safety. helped with my "co-ordination" and "hair". Dave Harris (D- Line) would like to thank Reading^s offence for turning up, so Half Time Motivational Chat he could play around with them. Peete would like to thanif the Half time score 2-0 lead to Surrey, However there was one guy team for not mentioning his receding hairiine. who was un-h^)py witb the score line, be was a "raving beai^ chappie" aka Pete "F word" Vaughan aka Stingers Headcoadi. MVPs for this game were Puma (20 carries for 70 yards), Mario In die 15 minutes break the Surrey squad learnt a whole new (24 carries for 670 yards), Kevin Akers & Chris "Rutger" vocabul^ firom Pete. They were also given that extra push of Sandison (for catching the ball), James Lizars (blocked punt) motivation, sending them back into tbe second half wanting to and myself, JD (for completing three passes). kill any thoughts Reading had on winning the game. This didn't Lastly the team would like to thank the Headcoacb, Pete Vaug- take long whra in the tbinl quarter JD tl^w (for once) the ball han for everything he has given us. Let's do it all over ^ain out to Hugh "Puma" KUpatrìck. Puma was faced wiüi an open (with a few more wins) next year! Thanks to Chris Pye for field (a rare sight for Stinger players) and ran the ball 29 y^ agonizingly filming this game to make it in to a horror movie for a touchdown, 8-0. with an X-rating. If anyone wants a copy give Chris a ring this webend on (01276) 856162 or leave a not in the pigeon hole. The rest of the game brought more mayhem for a dying Read- They will cost a fiver. Remember (I love saying this) check the ing. Tbe infamous E>an Brice and his intercqitioDs; Scott "I American Football pigeon hole, we may have a friendly or catch everything in training" Parratt and his nearly intmreption; toumam»>t planned. We could even be in Üie Plate Competition JD throwing the ball again, to Kevin Akers (not Ru^er); JD not this weekend! Seven Strike Gold in Surrey Hills Last s^urday the Duke of Edinburgh So- thoe was a certain dga-vu feeling about quickly for a team photo before catching ciety held its first expedition of the year the place. We stopped for lunch at Fmi- the train back to Guildford The day was with a day hike around the Surrey hurst and having sufficiently stuffed our a great success with everyone having a countryside. A total of 5 members and 2 faces with such gourmet delights as g{X)d time (oo-err) and we are now re^y leaders were minibused (courtesy Dave dieese & salad cream sarnies we moveJ to begin tbe real hikes towards our Gold Vincent) to Blackdown (where???) for off for the secwd leg. On the way Iain award. Thanks to Richard & Reyn^ for 11am. The weather was perfect and seemed to be suddenly struck with tem- sharing tbeir knowledge and wisdom everyone was eager to head towards Li- porary amnesia as be lost bis boot and witb us. Thanks also to god for no rain as pbook 18k's away. forgot to stop walking gettmg a little I had no waterproofs, but I did have an muddy. B y this time ev^one had leam't umbrella. Yours truely was awarded the m^ and how to use a compass (the thing with a therefore the blame if we got lost as we needle for those who dcxi't know) and Tbe D of E meets every Tuesday to ar- began to walk. The morning went diis greatly increased our progress. We range activities etc in LT B at 6pm. New quickly and we soon realised that not all arrived in Liphook ^ 4:4(^ pausing members always welcome. the signs were facing the right way and 24tii February 1995 19 DON'T MISS THESE!! GUILDFORD WEEKEND TREATS FOR YOU! FLAMES Campusport Ice Hockey Club This Saturday 25th February FACULTY SPORTS DAY at the Campusport Centre and Varsity Centre between 10.00 ajn. - 6.00 pjn. COMPETITION Come along and support your department and friends on this wacky day of inter-de- Just fw a change, we have two tickets to give fw the next Guildford Flames match partmental sport. Masses of different which is against sports to watch - soccer, basketball, üig of To enter just write the answer to the question printed below, down on a piece of war, table tennis etc. It prcanises to be a p^)er along with your name and UnicNi card number and put it into the Bare Facts great day f(x everyone and someone has box in the Union enterance. All entries must be received by mid-day. got to win the cup! And don't forget the You must be at the G.M. on Tuesday at 1pm to collect your prize. Facul^ Sports Day Disco in the Students Union in the evening at 8.00 pjn. Question: When the referee calls a minor Saturday 25th and Sunday penalty how long must the player sit off for? 26th February THE HOT SHOE SHOW If you don't win this week you can also get tickets at the bargain price of £2.50 (including student discount). The Flames Hotline is at 7.30 p.m. in PATS on 0891 800 689 Yes folks - it's this weekend. The Hap- Calls cost 39p per minute cheap rate and 49p at other times. penings IV performance by all the stu- dents, staff and members of the public who have been taking part in the various SURREY STINGERS AEROBICS CLASSES : Campusdance classes put CHI their own CHANGES OF VENUE show FOR YOU! A wonderful selection WIN! of dance styles so there is something for WEEKS 8 -10 everywie. Still a few tickets left Come Sunday 12th Febuary saw the Surrey along to the (^ampusport Centre or Infor- Stingers American Football Team win Campusport miUion Centre and pick up our special their first ever match 6-2. Surrey offer of5 tickets for£12.50 before it'stoo Travelled up to play their rookie rivals, As you maybe aware, the University Hall late. the Hertfordshire Hurricanes, with only will NOT be available for classes at regu- 14 players. Nearly everyone played of- lar intervals from week 8 - week 10. fence and defence for the whole miatch. Therefore several Sports Clubs have BE A SPORT! The linemen played every down in the adapted their use of the Campusport game. Despite this, Surrey managed to Ontre so that we can acccnnmodate the Campusport hold off Hertfordshire's 33 man squad, to aerobics classes. Please understand that be tied 0-0 by halftime. In the thiid quar- music sound will have to be reduced and Get your kit on for COMIC ter, a hand off to Hugh "Puma" Kilpatrick space for changing rooms and activities is RELIEF. resulted in a 70 yard touchdown run. In SHARED. the fourth quarter, Dave "Yankiee" Ro- berts and Marios Demetriou stopped a Please note the following venues: RED NOSE FUN Hertfordshire player, with a NFL quality RUN ON tackle on a fourth down at our 2 yard line. MONDAY 27th FEBRUARY With the ball in our possession, we gave 6.00 - 7.00 AEROBICS in University WEDNESDAY 15th the Hurricanes a safety for 2 points. This HaU enabled Mario to punt the ball about 65 MARCH yards. WEDNESDAY 1st MARCH 2.15 from the Campusport HertfOTdshire with the ball on their own 5.00-6.00 AEROBICS in Campusport Centre 10 yard line were unable to fight back and Centre Main Hall Start planning - we want your support. the Surrey Stingers took their ftfst ever THURSDAY 2nd MARCH victory. Surrey's Most Valuable Players Think up some mad, bad ideas for our fun were, running backs Marios Demetriou 5.30 - 6.30 CALLANETICS in Tap nm - come in fancy dress; prepare to crawl (28 carries for 140 yards), Hugh "Puma" Room, C^pusport Ontre round campus; push a bed - anything goes, but we need YOU! ! Kilpatrick (24 carries for 156 yards) and 6.30-7.30 AEROBICS in Campusport lineman Scott Parratt. Although, cr^it is Ontre Main Hall Application and sponsorship forms will due to evCTy member of the team that be ready from the Campusport Centre by tumed up to play. MONDAY 6th - FRIDAY 17th the end of next So get your thinking caps MARCH : ALL CLASSES AT CAM- on and make it a spectacular end to the Nathaniel Renouf (JD) PUSPORT CENTRE (Venues as Indi- term. Surrey Stingers Secretary cated above) Bare Facts Go Fourth and Multiply elc(Hne to the second installment of "how the forths got on on Saturday." Their c^ponents wo^ Bedfont Green 'A' in the league cup semi-final rq)lay, Wfollowing a 2-2 draw in the first match. It was always going to bea difficult game, a sraii-final against SPORT a si^ three divisions i^ve them, and so it proved. Within a minute some opportunist attacking and hésitant defending saw Surrey go 1-0 down. This could quite easily bave ended tbe game as a contest before it bad really begun, but to tbeir credit the foiths took the game U) tbe oi^sition, and were rewarded with an expertly taken equaliser from Glyn P^er, sweeping the ball into the net via the post firom tw^ty Surrey WFC 0 yards. Minutes Uter Gary Kellett, who had an outstanding game made it two with another well taken goal. Haj Langford Sussex WFC 2 added a third, and a good half was complete. A reckless elbow to tbe face deprìved Surrey of tbe services tartìng the tenn a Éresh - new sponsorship, new strìpes of the aggressive and imiM^sive Paul Evans for the second (Thanks Mr. Fìikin, we love you too), new traing tops & ali half. The rearranged defence had a lot of work to do, twice chicken stories forgotten - we headed off to Sussex clearing off the line frcnn corners, and soaking up more SUniversity with our new 'Manager' (The Gaffer) tucked pressure than tbey'd have liked. away ne^ttly undo* our ann - weil under somecmes arm anyway, This, however created oi^rtunities on the break, and our but we shan't say who(!). By recent tram outing ü^itions we knew heroes might easily have notched up anotber four. Tbey had the trip would not end in a simple football game. - in fact it ended to be content with one though, Kellett netting his second after in Chancellors - ali day. The (^positions cunning pian to tiy to get good wofk by Stuart Bryan. He could and should have had a a bye to the next round did much for our spirits & pintage, but it third, but roUed tbe ball inches wide when clean through. must be said, little for the nerves of the UCAS candidates who Langford then placed ¿e ball accross a gaping goal when a sbuffled hurridly away every time we attempted to serande them. fifith seemed inevitable, and Kostiadis crashed the ball against Perhaps it was a bit much lo expect them to cope with Norwegian an unfortunate post with an angled drive. drinking songs on their first outing without their mums. StiU, the day s^ed as a good initiation for the gaffer, who demonstrated Tben foUowed more backs to tbe wall defence, and with two just how beneficiai he was going to be to the team by downing bis minutes left Bedfont pulled one back. They then scrambled green 'mucky pint' in under 10 seconds. home another via a defender's boot but had no time to press for an equaliser. And so to day 2, "come up here", we said, "our pitches are fab & RkhAUen by gaffy we've got an ATP too!" So fab are they in fact, that it'd be a shame to d^ them, better to stay out late tbe night before & get sesbed instead. Waking up on aid day we found summer had arrived early 8l, expectingSussex to already be on route, we Audio Visual Services larked around the Varsity Centre wiht waterpistols, ready to sort out anyone that crossed our paths. Unfortunately, of the many that did, none knew or card wl:^ happened to our match, -ho bum, are pleased to he assodated with and he printing for drunk in tiie Union again then. The University of Surrey Day 3 dawned fresh with the news of another game which had to be played by the end of the week. Adding it to our current stockpile, we sat back in our armchairs in the assumption someone Students' Union bad a pian. Someone didn't Up with the larks on day 4, it was time for a severe sorting out "Bare Facts" Phonecards at the ready, our overskilled & underpayed fictures sectretary did a whirlwind job, flnally setting up the tie fcx Friday on ATP. Obviously feeling tbe weeks endeavours were not per- A warm welcome is extended to ali University rance enough for ber sins, sbe was then rewarded with anear death Staff & Students to fui/ili your requirements in experience on the pitch during the game, sad to say, but Bare Facts "-V does not hold a high enough certificate rating to cope with the graphie détails - suffice it to say the minutes silence that decended over tbe pitch was üiankfully cut short! Printing & Photocopying So there it was, day 5 & tbe game fìnally played. A sui table climax Graphic Design to the week's build up, everyone did themselves proud in pulling off the best team p^ormance. Pats on the back ali round & Phptography especially for CyriI the ref for bis support/help on the field & at the biu". well what can you say, another defeat another beer. We' ve defiantely improved though - we can take our drink much Television j& Audio better now - weil exœpt Caroline who ran out on ber mucky pint! It's never too late to join in playing or supporting - tbe mo^ Projeqticto Services ^ people we have, üie longer it'll be tíll the 'mur^ pint' round starts (.externaì^ustomers welcomff^. from the beginning again. ^ ' ' " • ÙììNersity of Surrey, ^ ' ' , bu^lclfen^. Surrey, C7W2 5XH. , Tel: H>1483) 259290 Fax <01483) 259390 • - • ' ^