J9S days until WIIISU forces The Cord out of office space The Cord Weekly

Is an apartment the right Women's b-ball on brink

abode for 16 you? page of OUA title page 20

44 Volume Issue 24 Wednesday March 3, 2004 www.clublaurier.ca

Adios Turret Thursdays

As students opt to stay in and study, sales diminish and programming changes for on-campus bar

JEFFREY HAWKINS nights. The committee, in Staff Writer consultation with several housing- dons and Residence The Turret Nightclub will be Life Area Coordinators, closed Thursday nights reviewed the surveys and for events. As except special Thursday revenues to gain a of last Friday. "Old School" better understanding of Fridays" and "Premier what students want and offered Saturdays" are now what would be financially for Turret patrons. feasible.

According to Mandy Also taken into account

Dennison, Laurier's was the competition the Students' Union Vice- Turret might face on Friday President: Marketing, the nights. decision to switch nights "We spoke to the dons came from a "Your Bar, Your and ELACs and discovered

Say" survey. Over 500 that more and more first Laurier students took part year students simply have in the conducted too classes survey by many on Fridays, the A-Team in co-operation and are staying in on with the Business Thursdays to study," stated Promotions committee Dennison. "We weren't

Week. to before Reading going go against them making class." "We'll be doing "We used to have Turret about Fridays five years ago more of a rock but then switched over to

theme which is Thursdays, so switching- back won't be anything new. what exactly We are giving the students students indicated what they said they want," said Herman. they wanted more When asked about the possible competition the of" Wilbur McLean Turret will confront for -Dan WLUSU Herman, Friday nights, Herman stat- Rockin' the dance floor at the Turret during the first "Old School" Friday, one of the results of the President in the club. ed, "We shouldn't have a recent "Your Bar, Your Say" survey. At around 1:00 am there were about 40 people

problem there because we are com- due to the double mirror comments made m Dan Herman, WLUSU are providing* a different really suffering, younger mented Dr. WLU cohort. Either I think the student President, stated that the kind of theme than the rest Rosehart, way survey. Fridays

President and Vice- it's a that will consist of rock & then reviewed the He good thing they now survey was by of nightclubs." con- Chancellor. this are in favour of the retro music, whereas an ad hoc "renewal commit- tinued, "We'll be doing more "Maybe reacting-

switch is an indication that current trend of studious will remain Top tee" specifically concocted to of a rock theme which is Saturdays are trying* to market to behaviour." 40, R&B and orient- decide whether to keep exactly what students indi- they hip-hop an older crowd since the Friday and Saturday ed. Turret Thursdays or shift cated they wanted more of." all first students are much nights are now structured to over to Friday and Saturday "Campus pubs over year

bunch of from take a quotes onlookers and compile them

into an accurate rendition of climax Gib's occurs Kid Exploding performance. Anyways, I've already talked about what each of CHRIS CLEMENS informed the ly by saucy these bands does in other Radio Laurier's final installment of Entertainment Editor RadioLaurier representative shouldn't reviews so I really Kat Lourenco that I was in have to do it twice. the series Last Thursday night at fact currently listening to Music Explosion proves Avid watcher Kate approximately 11 o'clock I the punk stylings of Kid Turner started the soapbox was swiftly walking across Gib. Taking out my leather- successful some commentary on a good note, yet again, despite the Concourse. I was also bound professional journal- enthusiastically revealing that the vaguely hoping ist notebook (read: neon that she was "thoroughly disappointing performances RadioLaurier staff had post-it notes), I set- orange impressed!" by the pop-punk somehow been incompetent tled in to take notes on the set that she had just wit- enough to delay their final remnants of the first band's nessed. Roaming passer-by Music Explosion show long performance. After spend- Melissa Shirley was more past its scheduled start time ing' at least two minutes dig- skeptical although she of 10 sharp. An excellent ging through pockets my admitted that the perform- Festival show had for I looked in Fringe a pen, up just ance "got better as it went run extraordinarily late, time to see that they were on." At this, I noddedsagely; and my carefully calculated finishing their set and leav- every time Fve seen Kid Gib schedule of events was con- ing the stage. Not good. they ended on a relatively sequentially shot to hell. I strong note. However, a was missing the ultimate of comments "What's with the variety rang- samurai showdown of ing from"I wasn't paying WLU's best bands, the win- mouth?" and potty attention." to "They sucked," ner of whom would repre- similar comments to "What's with the potty sent our school against mouth? They kept dropping other 'Battle of the Bands' the the made it suggested F-bomb," appar- from champions campuses ent that the masses were masses were across the nation. somewhat displeased. To be The echoing sounds of somewhat fair, Kid Gib was ranked new school punk confirmed fourth out of all the com- that I was going to be displeased. petitors and consequentially unfashionably late. destined to the show in open I Nonetheless, effortlessly I won't lie to - I you front of a relatively sober breezed past the two people about thought making- up have crowd, so they may in line outside Wilfs with some kind of cool story RadioLaurier been irrevocably cursed by incredibly influential about wild antics and my guitar Satan. Student well with Publications cre- but I Kid F-word did not over possibly goats, quickly Gib's excessive use of the go dentials and was immediate- Wilfs. figured out that I could just Thursday at Continued on 22 the Music Explosion crowd this past page * S. . .

MMIB| J|v£ rriTlTSjWlIPC111 LwTSJI B IjiT| [imflH

|||

(1|il) St. Patricks Day Wednesday March 17th

What better reason to take a day off?

You deserve a Break.

from Tickets $10 any Wilf's Employee

BRUNCH - LIVE ENTERTAINMENT - GOOD TIMES

mmmmmmmmnmmmm—————iBWBBBWBHWBMiawHHWHWMWBWi mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm News Wednesday March 3,2004 3

Board questions VP hiring

he should come and of the WLUSU's governance policy. policy, Members 2004-2005 WLUSU BOD to hold the is to with me try "It my responsibility speak personally," follow these policies," he said. said Welker.

accountable for "The concerns do not Union their recruiting practices hiring committee Costache's there. assures these policies are end committee complied with." "Are [hiring CUNNINGHAM committee recommends. "It's not so much a matter APRIL Costaehe has done a little members] recommending the News Editor But Costaehe feels BOD of trust," said Costache. "It's research on the Ontario best people, or people they members are in a position to a matter of wanting to know with?" Corporations Act, under can work well of WLUSU's new board direc- see more information, what it is we what per- are ratifying." which WLUSU falls. He is "Isn't that you would tors is already taking- steps to haps even all applicants' Matt Vice Chair of pro- Gouett, concerned that WLUSU poli- want?" asked Welker saying the of noted ensure transparency posals. the Board of Directors, that it is for the cy does not completely corre- important and of its "I the organization would rather be sleep- that it is not feasible for to be able to work spond with the act. president ing at 7:30 in the members to have a in hir- with vice managers. morning say The act stipulates that well presidents. the of next With hiring than being a rubber all in the Welker admit that stamp," ing- positions organ- directors of the corporation did vice occur- such to year's presidents ization as co-ordinators, Costache was just trying the ring throughout past executive members and part- do his job by promoting week, board time does incoming mem- staff. References were transparency. But he ber Tudor Costaehe illustrat- staff at made to hiring not believe Costache under- his the ed concern regarding Harvey's. stands how serious it would

of the new BOD in role "Where is the line, be if a VP was not ratified. chosen candi- approving Tudor?" lie asked. Hiring would have to be re- dates. also used the Welker opened and time frames forth motion Ball deco- He brought a example of Charity would be skewed.

that would allow board mem- rations. He said that the This is the first BOD in bers to be debriefed with board cannot be involved hi recent that has pro- memory ratification. posals before The deciding how to decorate the caused such controversy over not trusts motion was passed. facility and the the hiring of VP positions. do Charity Ball Committee to In the end, Welker and the in must "Are [hiring so the same way they committee provided a bit trust the Committee Hiring more information than has committee to recommend VP candidates. been supplied in the past. Costache believes that members] Wilbur Mclean by Wilbur Mclean "They told us the using such a comparison. strengths and experiences of the Steve Welker, 2004-05 WLUSU Tudor Costache, 2004-05 director recommending Welker seemed to minimize candidates," said Costache. President and CEO. of on the WLUSU board. the significance hiring "The hiring committee tends best people, or vice But presidents. to do a good job. it was lie to the can said, "A lot of the info I was after. people they referring early stupid things are solely responsible for still not that meeting where vice presi- were said in meeting," vice "I was a nice rubber work well with?" appointing' presidents very dents said Costache. would be approved. and other officers. This stamp: Version 2.0." -Tudor Costache, Steve Welker, WLUSU Costache also mentioned means BOD members are

President Elect, said there that it makes sense to dele- Jennifer BOD member completely liable for the deci- With files from confusion of roles. the but that he was a gate job sions of the hiring' commit- Asselin "If can't trust them on the committee to yon expects jus- tee, placing much responsi- to WLUSU's this how can trust tify their decision. According issue, you bility in their hands. Governance the board them in other issues?" he to Welker, the Policy, According "I am not familiar with the is of directors must ratify a list asked in reference to the hir- current method of hiring [Ontario Corporations Act]. If of that the committee. in strict accordance with applicants hiring ing Tudor has a problem with

Another vote

to take place

JENNIFER ASSELIN Elect Steve Welker who will

News Editor be working- one-on-one with the elected commissioner,

next "There will be Laurier Brantford students year. a

will have another opportuni- greater ability to communi-

ty to cast ballots as they elect cate and communication will in next year's campus commis- increase due to increase 18. sioner on March time [put in]." The Wilfrid Laurier When asked about the communica- University Students' Union- exact amount of motion three weeks tion that will take passed a place

which stated that the between the Union and the Photo Illustration Ananthan Sundaresan ago. by Brantford student represen- commissioner Welker stated,

test the - classrooms and office The proj- tative would now be an elect- "well just have to Coming to a theater near you Laurier Brantford space. redevelopment rather start the Board of ed position as opposed to one water, i would ect for the satellite campus has been approved by Governors. that is hired like in previous with too much communica-

The commis- and then take it back a years. campus tion little than it be sioner acts as a liaison rather having'

has the around." between campuses and other way Brantford in the "I think it's to be no voting 1 power going expands Union. great," said Heather Barrie, Brantford's current Campus the has This can be to Commissioner. "I think that building, year. compared the the "It's beginning JENNIFER ASSELIN double the theatre's space by applications throughout this is the first time the board News Editor have a second floor which stu- building- province, of a long-term has really listened to the inside. decreased by 25-35% from dents of Brantford." structure where Growing- x; numbers have last year's double cohort When asked about the fact caused Laurier Brantford influx. students that the commissioner still "We need to start Brantford to campus expand with the WLUSU was also interest- doesn't have any voting value for purchase and redeveloping students ed in this building project in get more "I'm not power Barrie replied, providing of a vacant Odeon Theatre in order to student but provide for." happy about that [what's with not what the downtown value, just offices. they pay core. space including' They happened so far] is a step in "It has been a very excit- had a $400,000 commitment; -Dan Herman, WLUSU need a the direction." space. They right be involved ing project to however, once the University President Nomination for packages lot more than what with," commented Leo realized they already had Brantford students will be of the Groarke, Dean enough funding- for the proj- available March 4. The pack- "This is a short-term plan they're getting." Brantford in an ect, WLUSU decided against March 11 when campus to allow for said ages are due -Dan WLUSU growth." interview with The Record, Herman, the deal. WLUSU President Dan the campaign period opens. The $2.4 million project President "We are now looking at the Herman. Herman explained "It's the beginning Laurier's was approved by different options," said Dan the Union has of a long-term structure further plans Governor's last Board of This redevelopment proj- Herman, WLUSU President. store for the satellite cam- where Brantf'ord students get in of the week. The cost expan- ect is to be financed with WLUSU is now consider- the what which includes a gover- value for they pay pus. will be shared with the sion $1.3 million from WLU's ing Stillman House, a 140- for." committee to nance possibly Brantford and City of Super-Build funding, year-old heritage building The full- be elected in the fall. position will be the Mohawk College. $600,000 from a City of closer to main campus This committee would time during the summer and slated to The project is Brantford and where it expects to encounter stu- grant include three Brantford part-time for the rest of the this fall when incom- finish $500,000 from Mohawk more student traffic. President the WLUSU year, much like the WLUSU dents, students ing are getting College which plans to share "We need to start provid- the Brantford Campus Vice-President is at and enter position ready to campus. some office and classroom ing students with value, not would the Waterloo The Commissioner. They Groarke that in said Herman. campus. explained space the new building. just space," to discuss issues position also meet is a stan- pays approxi- the chosen building The extra is needed "They need a lot more than surround- space mately $17,000 as to brought forward in the opposed dard theatre built in order to facilitate the what they're getting." and the $1,800 offered Brantford students stipend ing 19605. increase in student popula- now. the itself. campus Vicano Construction, tion. Brantford campus "I think it's Laurier great," com- from whom acquired 30% this applications are up mented WLUSU President 4 News Wednesday March 3. 2004

Old faces, new jobs Bag O' Crime

MISCHIEF 0950 HRS WED

FEB 25/04 MISCHIEF 1030-1220 HRS hired vice SAT FEB 28/04 Recently presidents display The Coca Cola delivery driv- unknown tore off er reported that someone Person(s) of within had the buzz board at the plenty experience the Union tampered with the vend- panel ing machines at Bricker entrance to Willison Hall. Residence. JENNIFER ASSELIN also been a residence don. MISCHIEF 0330 HRS SUN News Editor Baptiste is this year's THEFT OVER $5000 FEB FEB 29/04 WLUSU Market Research Co- Shack staff 06/04 - FEB 24/04 Pita reported The final decision for next ordinator. He has also gained A WLU student that the in one of Wilfrid reported finding' glass year's Laurier experience in WLUSU as a sometime between the above the Terrace doors broken. Union Vice Students' director on the 2002-2003 noted dates person(s) President positions was BOD. unknown broke into her ATTEMPT THEFT 0100 HRS made Monday morning 1 . WLUSU co-ordinator and locker in the Nichols SUN FEB 29/04 The VP: position of executive positions are hir- A of residents at the lenniter Asselin Building and stole approxi- group Finance and Administration ing' within the next few St Residence 250 CD's in a leather King went to John Crowell, VP: weeks. mately reported Vice Dan Robert, 2004-2005 of case. the theft a lap top comput- Student Services to Dan carrying President: Student Services er. that Robert, VP: Student They report they FIRE ALARM-FALSE 0040 chased an unidentified male Activities went to Crissy HRS FRI FER 27/04 who was observed exiting Morelli, VP: Human and Person(s) unknown caused a one of the suites caught Resources to Mark Walliout fire alarm at the St him near King and and VP: Marketing to Sam King Ave. The male Residence by activating a University Baptiste. station. Waterloo Fire subsequently turned over Crowell enters his posi- pull the and fled. Dept responded. There was lap top tion after representing stu- smoke no sign of or fire. dents as a director on this MISCHIEF 1217 HRS SUN year's WLUSU Board and sat THEFT UNDER $5000 FER FEB 29/04 on the Finance and Building

26/04 - FEB 27/04 Person(s) unknown broke a committee. He also has the Person(s) unknown stole the window by the main leadership skills of being a Lucinda House from entrance to MacDonald residence don for the past sign House. the front lawn area. two years. Robert is this Foot year's Contributed Photo FALSE FIBE ALABM 0145 DRUGS POSSESSION 0245 Patrol Co-ordinator and is HRS SUN FEB 29/04 John Crowell, 2004-2005 Vice 2004-2005 Vice HBS SAT FEB 28/04 also a Laurier Ambassador. Crissy Morelli, Officers to President: Finance and Admin. unknown caused a responded a call He too has been involved in President: Student Activiteis Person(s) fire alarm at the Science from the don at residence life. duty House Building by activating a pull Heidelberg regarding As this year's Charity Ball station. There no of some Co-ordinator, Morelli has was sign people "smoking up" outside. smoke or fire. On arrival, a "bong" gained experience in the was found on the realm of student activities. ground MISCHIEF 0015 HBS SAT next to one of the individu- She was also Orientation FEB 28/04 als. This item was seized and Week Activities co ordinator unknown broke turned over to this Last Person(s) Regional year. year she was a Police. The matter will also the glass in a door to the Charity Ball executive and entrance of the conference be forwarded to the Judicial part of the Hiring Committee room at the King St Affairs Council. as a general volunteer. Residence. Walhout was also part of this year's WLUSU BOD. As a

director, he gained HR expe-

as the current

Executive Assistant of VP:

Sarah Carroll. For the Mark Walhout, 2004-2005 Vice Sam Baptiste, 2004-2005 Vice

President: Human Kesources President: Marketing

News Bites

Revolution Nightclub assault spokesperson for Waterloo woman for the Ontario Regional Police said that Public Service Employees'

* information had not been Union interview iH' ill §vv * An assault ending' in a seri- in an with fit ii m 112 dl'ilh--* at released "The less we the Canadian Press. ous head injury took place yet. say .» the better for deal Revolution Nightclub right now the The includes a 3% the certificate in e-Business of those raise to postgraduate Saturday evening at approx- safety parties retroactive involved." imately 2:30 am. September 1. 2003, a 0.5% on Your university degree was the first part of the journey: Humber is Waterloo Regional Police April 1 and 2%. Further to the next. In just one year, our new leading-edge program can launch don't strike responded immediately to Colleges that, there will be a 2% you into the wired world of e-Business. You'll cover everything from the club located at 341 increase on September 1 and to electronic and Ontario e-marketing branding commerce, more. Marsland Dr. to investigate a college professors 2004 and 1.8% on April 1, Call ext 3337, _ between two males. A are a of 2005. (416) 675-6622, fight breathing sigh relief, _ or e-mail [email protected] HUMBER 28-year-old male was taken as they were able to agree to A vote by approximately fjj to hospital and remains in a tentative deal just hours 8,000 full- and part-time fac- The Business School stable condition at before the strike deadline. ulty, librarians and counsel- University Hospital in The two-year agreement lors to ratify the decision will London. A second man, 19 states that a task force on take place within a few

of arrested at contentious workload issues weeks. years age, was will the scene for the assault of be created and also The strike would have

increase in the other male. He was includes a 7.3% affected 178,000 students at

over two Ontario's 24 released soon after pending pay years. colleges. "It's for students MPhf Now Marctt2oo4. further investigation. good When asked if those and certainly it's good for Compiled by Jennifer Asselin commented involved were students at faculty," Katie

Laurier Olaf Heinzel, a Fitzßandolph, a spokes-

CAIVTEAI:H CSteer Services 10-11 3 T1.30-12.38 Hi Educational Consultants '

• Call Toll Free: 1-880-400-6788 E-mail: mlke#canttach.net • www.caiiteaeh.net Iy I We're eyeing you up

[email protected]

SW 621-7777 mterlbl

m&fLUn. & PicU Up ( )„L f Hg IA/cmirenAY MARCH 3.2004 News 5

Ohhhh snow: not out of the clear yet

Online registration anticipated

MICHELLE PINCHEV require waiting in lineups to neously with first year stu-

Staff Writer see professors or counsellors, dents using LORIS and

not to mention the final trip everyone else using the man- It has been frequently point- to the registrar at 202 ual form. ed out that WLU stands for Regina, where there's always According- to Metcalfe, the this to "We Line Up." Until now, a line according to students. school is trying* introduce than has been more apparent Because of the inefficiency the system slowly and step-

a to ever during registration, of the system, many students by-step avoid problems confusion, line- would time of long* simply end up settling seen at other schools when needless hassle for not intro- ups and with courses they did such programs were Laurier students. A new era want because changing the duced too quickly.

- stu- want to has begun for Laurier schedule was such a hassle. "Every year we

dents can now register "The whole process takes expand .it," Metcalfe explains.

online. two days of- waiting in line," "So eventually it can be on all

' is be the "Registration awful," says Bourque. You should time, allowing' people to

Richard able to do courses online as says Bourque. a that with the click add/drop student of the of button." late the school would fourth year a as per- final process. Being in his mit." won't year. Bourque have the Overall, the system is "It's a LORIS for big change. chance to use pretty flawless according to which course selection, Students have the registrar and everyone is

alongside the fact that he excited. "It's a big wanted online very majors in Computer Sciences, change. Students have want- is "It's for ed online for extremely frustrating. registration registration www.wlu.ca have said never right, you always years," Metcalfe, The LORIS website is for students to however to make a change or some- years." With the system automat- now ready register It should be take won't fit. ed, a lot of time will be freed actual course selection won't place until June. thing- -Dr. John Metcalfe, WLU other for staff to be of automated; every up greater pie." "immeasurably". school does it that way." Registrar assistance to students. Of course there are still LORIS course selection For those who are unfa- Now that students don't some downfalls. For will be available for students miliar with the registration need to physically run instance, certain fourth-year on June Ist and will remain process upper year students Students will be able to clo around the school meeting courses with specific until August 10th. have encountered, manual just that. Dr. John Metcalfe with department heads, very open won't be listed Students must confirm that prerequisites pro- registration required the registrar himself says. Metcalfe still stresses the and students who wait until LORIS between from line to grams 011 students go one depart- "Don't up. Use LORIS." importance of talking the of the end summer to register March Ist and April 10th ment to another having their he encouraged. counsellors and professors. will find most of will not be schedules checked LORIS is "not their top however, or they by profes- Right now both systems meant to take choices unavailable. For the able to register online in the sors for each course added or (manual and automated) the place of counselling and most students will find summer. dropped. Each visit would have been running' simulta- talking- to real, informed peo- part, that their access will increase

"OCK W ra LIVE BANDS @ 10pm

" ■'- /l AWESOME DRINK FEATURES! . NITEy! y

& / mmipWkMwr*.hpipii H^FSKL^SB^SBlSl^^^wwigp^iip IBIPSMIIE2IiIO?IP^itji i0 # ww fßil ||| t&xi 1 nli] a- » .™«m fi®'"l n.

J SHOW us l yLiaag- * *"* ••'**« » )

( \ Menu. Get a Big Xtra /' /

HMcDeal for $1.69 plus tax! Mondays only J j J Opinion 6 Wednesday March 3,2004

The Cord Weekly Just another fish in the The tie that binds since 1926

A Wilfrid Laurier University Student Publication Third Floor, Fred Nichols Campus Centre 75 University Avenue West, sea of cliches Ontario, N2L 3C5 unending Waterloo,

(519) 884-1970 ext. 3564

Fax: (519) 883-0873 These are usually used when Advertising: (519) 884-1970 ext. 3560 News Editor Asselin wrote this Jenn worrying* about the next thing- www.wlusp.com coming up on life's agenda. After

e-mail: editorial because for a 21 as someone who is [email protected] everything happens years con- stantly thinking about what's going' to happen next, it's hard to "Yeh, he dances! Awww... I like the mice." reason and go from planning thinking - Farm-girl/News Editor April Cunningham, on the movie of the next day's trials and tribu- Babe Cliches are used only to make that lations to about News the worst situations seem thinking solely

what is happening at one exact much more bearable. We rhyme Editorial Board Editor do moment. them off as effortlessly as we In addition, of course it all our telephone numbers, not real- work's out in the end; but those Editor-in-Chief Wilbur McLean izing what it is we're actually who "It'll work itself Jennifer saying people say Production Caitlin Howlett Manager out" For mantra for are truly misleading you. If Asselin example, my News Editors JenniferAsselin think next week's and the longest time has been you essay the apartment hunting that April Cunningham "Everything happens for a rea- you need do this is to are simply going to The rang and I didn't son." Well, a ridiculously Editor Stefan Sereda phone Opinion 'work themselves out", you've know what to expect. A good dumb statement when looked at got

International Editor Bryn Boyce another thing coming'. No one is friend of mine was at the other critically. Of" course everything to in the effort for that's life - going' put to Entertainment Editor Chris Clemens end of the line telling me about happens a reason, such but accomplish things you. her recent break-up, and I was things happen because either you Sports Editor Derek Iwanuk It won't just happen on it's own, listening' intently trying to take or someone else did something to Features Editor Craig Radcuffe you've actually to do a bit of in all that I was being' told. When perpetuate an event. Therefore, got elbow work in the -"No Student Life Editor JOIN US!!! JOIN US!!! silence finally entered the picture there's a reason for what is occur- process no I tried to fill it with words of ring' - it's a causal result. pain, gain." right? Arts Editor Katie West It's amazing- how one encouragement and understand- meaning- Editor Thomas Thompson less can lead to another, Special Projects ing. However, to my dismay I phrase to only result in more unneces- began to utter the ugliest phrase To my dismay I Cord Staff contrived 'words of wis- known to victims of heart-break: sarily to utter the dom'. "There are plenty 0f..." I stopped began Production Assistants Carly Beath back, I'm sure the myself. Before the words had left ugliest phrase Thinking majority of people are of Denise Fung Susie Kovacs my babbling mouthI realized just guilty known to victims of the crime of how and disenchanti- committing ugly Jacquelyn Cain Ananthan Sundaresan unhelpful cliche overkill. Not falls ng the phrase "There are plenty heart-break: "There everyone Manager Amanda Elliott to such drivel, but do. Copy Editing of fish in the sea" really was. prey many What's not to like about a cliche, A are 0f..." handing Associate Copy Editor Amy Rogers It's simple expres- plenty of these and sion out in order to out one simple con- Editors Kim Brown society spits Copy trived make ourselves and those around phrases? It's the lazy per- Kevin Field Kate Johnston son's out of giving advice. us feel a bit better on days when Similar to this is the age-old way the steals lunch Whether it is to heal old Liz Goheen Brenda Heatley bully our money cliche, "With every ending comes to fix someone's or the non-athletic kid a new This too seems wounds or Heather Olaveson chubby beginning." life, clich- gets picked for baseballbefore us. redundant. Of course after an entirely dysfunctional Photo Manager Matt Benassi es are put to use as cush- Our conversations are full of ending there will be a beginning. simple I'll It's what call the cir- ions against the reality wherein Advertising Manager Elisabeth Oliveira such meaningless tripe, but be we humans don't our the first to admit that I use them cle of life. We use these empty things always go way. AdProduction Manager Nicole Wilker After all. "Life's a bitch and then on a fairly regular basis. words to make ourselves feel bet- AdProduction Asst's Mikel Sala die." Hypocritical, I know, but they're ter about the situation we're in you to out in when in that all Kam Athwal so easy pull a desperate reality is they are

situation. You know what they - empty words. IT Manager Ian Lochbihler situations call say: "desperate for Other personal favourites S WSS88 desperate measures." See: it's just include "Live for the moment" IftfScß |j® 7 that simple. and "It'll all work out in the end". WLUSP Administration (ky-boahed!)

President Laura Jardine VP: Finance Tunde Igli meal VP: Advertising Angela Foster Unhappy Board of Directors Mike D'Aloisio

Marc Henein Sandra Mackenzie I still worked at McDonald's Bryden Gage Jennifer McDonald Does it much worse than at get working last summer. It was just a few

shifts on few still Corporate Secretary Amanda Kirkwood a weekends, but McDonald's? and to McCullough vs. Mcjobs, enough get written up twice within three Once CONTEfBlJTOMS appearances. maybe Grimace too... for being "offensive" and on the Sven McCullough, Jeffrey Hawkins. Michelle Pinchev, VusufRaqW, Kirs very next weekend I was hauled Cote, Tyler VVBiarns, Mike Borreiii, Richard logman, Jeffrey Hawkins, into the office for "not doing David Ricci, Lan Ball, Brendan Jones,Stephanie Butcher, John Mecidick. take five out in rainstorm days a stuff." the of Despite vagueness Chris Collie, Kat Lourenco, Eric Chow. Brian J. D'Souza, Alysla Wyviile, What Were with little, if any, sleep and the allegations, I still returned to Heather Sweeney, Sherry-Lynn McKever, TJ HH, Shawn Parker, Bernard orders barked at constantly being work at McDonald's at the Dawson, Colin Duffett, Shannon Kohlmeier, Dave Bone, Sarah Graves. You Thinking? begin- before I'd me ever spend my sum- of this school I'm the Pete Cram, Erika Ivansc, Lauren Thompson, Denial Roth, Fraser King; ning year. mer vacation working at longest serving employee at my McDonald's. Where's the table?: Team The Crissy, my seat at Important Gandhi vs. store without a promotion. Robots is goingto make bowling its pet donkey, unless its two members Sven Finally I'm number one at some- are too inebriated: Caitlin, 1 cant believe you never watched Babe; no McCollough thing, so I can't give that presti- thanks whichever of and/or Little dis- ...that's fine and So one Nee, Bob, Guy gave me a gious position up. ease (too vague, no big deal), but thanks to the others and good luck to because dandy, Just like the last two sum- Neil on his interviews, goodluck to Steph on her interviews, thanks to I was reading The Record last differ- mers, this one will be no Michele Kramer for not embarrassing me in class, showers. Tammy for the week and saw a full of sum- joining Army who page ent. I'll full-time at lendingme Moulin Rouge!, everyone helped with the section, get a job any mer ads. It seems that a lot of I for me, Liv Oscar and job alibi to that isn't McDonald's. Jeremy meeting Tyler's appearance, Jackie gave me an place this embarrasses her,. courses are so I because golf hiring, should to more places to leave apply -Stefan and Co. rewrote resume and got a my part-time my make damn sure I'm not making friend to fax it to one of the I'll job at McDonald's. food come May. be satisfied Before I I have to "Screw you!"to Blair and her friends who forget, say courses. Then Ie-mailed another working pretty much anywhere have started the Contributors week. Just love reading every kidding, I you one with my resume. bot- Working because I've seen the if don't know Blair: do hate already all even 1 you. Except i really you... Andre, I for four months at a course I worked the next school golf so a have belt back. The dental I'm year tom; everywhere else is step would really iike to my Boss wearing seems like a to make at McDonald's but that was as waist Is thin... wish mention Jackie for good way I'll wind at a around my quickly growing 1, too, to up. Preferably up job some as a can I know no reason other than to embarass her.... Seriously, does Pat have a vagi- money, although anything part-time part-time job working with someone would seem better than, what I've be. But I'm not na?... Oh yeah, I also have to mention the random who stopped rne complaining, lot It guy and make a whole of money. to liked last week. Thanks!. Just four weeks left. -WM done in the what I'm still because a bit say he my editorial past or working just gave like else I know seems everyone doing part-time. me for with official student otWilfridLaurier It is an inde- enough money important their They The Cord Weekly is the newspaper University. editorially gets lucky jobs. Two summers I went on a like car insurance and WilfridLaurier Student ago things have or pendentnewspaper publishedby University Publications, Waterloo, a corpo- usually a family member with the share is its board of directors. course Army Reserve. even more issues like ration without capital. WLUSP governedby pressing friend that can get them a job to make I They try your life a liv- doing nothing. worked just think making $20.00 an hour. I submitted with the author's student identification hell All letters to the editor must be signedand name, ing because it's part of stress enough so as to still be consid- it's about time I get something and number. Letters must be received by noon Tuesday on disk, or via e-mailat number, telephone training, but that's fine and ered but not so much employed handed to me. I want money of Cord letter'. Letters must be my [email protected] with the subject heading typed or easily legible the because Army that I became a lifer. dandy gave me My part-time for too. exceed 350 words. The Cord the to edit letter for and nothing and may not reserves right any brevity clarity. an alibi to leave part time job took a small of my job up very part So if knows a and will be corrected. The Cord reserves the right to reject any letter, in whole or anyone place Spelling grammar at I know if McDonald's. don't time last summer. I full- my got a where I lots of for in part. can get money McDonald's tries to break time job at a furniture factory let your doing pretty much nothing, or stress out like the all time material thatis deemed to be libelous or in contravention spirit instead of The Cord reserves the notto you spending my right publish me know where to sign up, does as of at McDonald's. with the Cord's Code ofEthics or standards. Army part training, It well and journalistic paid unless applying is too much but they're damn good at it. I'd better it wasn't McDonald's. yet, work. author and do not reflect those of theEditorial Opinionsexpressed arethose ot the necessarily Board,

The Cord, WLUSP, WLU or Hamilton WebPrinting. wordsWrite for addresses within Canada. The Cord is maximum 350 maximum words Cord subscription rates are $20.00 per temi printed by [email protected] 350

Hamilton Web Printingand ispublishedevery Wednesday. Wednesday March 3.2004 Opinion 7

Shifty's The devil's less Top 10 appealing form Rctiuities that Laurier

students may resort to much in up counting for more much easier to have those

Sweet than it is worth. When these determine what you nouj that the Turret isn't power performances fester into should think, through which Deals anti-truths and perhaps even the masses, even individuals, an option on Thursdays laws, however, the situation have become lazy. Pre-cooked becomes unfortunate. Many bacon, Dr. Phil, Britney

Len people are too content with Spears; these are the needs Ball who they are and what they which make us happy now. represent to ever consider Material wealth is stressed fundamental change, which with the utmost importance I Never before have experi- be is totally ridiculous given as what is required to con- enced such contempt for markets, that one will be consciously tented. Economic

from a morality public fig- and physically changing however, ensure that this can

ure. In addition to President until death (and arguably become a reality for only a

Bush's failure as a human perhaps after as well). There handful of individuals. being - he has of late publicly Bush , is so much information avail- Individuals such as denounced and is g'ays, able now that one can never who attain (but don't achieve) attempting- to pass a law that have the of based hope realizing power essentially on will ensure no can g'ay couple and learning- it all, and so economic backing and there- in the marry anywhere there will always exist the fore will only devise means to- United States. Clearly an continuing' goal of and for guarantee economic ends and excellent representative of self-improvement. Learning* policies to ensure this, can- true moral character, true to and experiencing* is what not be taken seriously on the Christian cult of southern makes us human, and hold- anything - related to either the in 10. Cougar hunting at Spur. 9. Invest more time their fundamentalist dominance, ing* on to tradition for the morality or humanity. Money for Bea Arthur (above) is the most heroin habit... or take junk as having no room or up place sake of understanding* 'the talks, as power listens. difference or division. Girl favorite Because there is so much respected cougar/Golden a pasttime way things are' is foolish. This indicates that namely culture, connotation and it is unwise to deviate from Somehow Bush symbolism tied up with dictated behaviour to governing money, it comes represent unless one can becom- to accept manages much more than simple cur ing denoted as 'other', and in rency. We have made money a the of and continually personify example being gay cultural deity. And subscrib-

desiring marriage, being the impossibility of ingl to a god with no sub- denied the other rights stance signifies that the reason. humans This tells can enjoy. believer is just as empty and me that the leader of the free void as the god; a product of world' hates g'ays. Hitler of Forty years ago being- environment only capable hated gays you know; look at scandal. and crude publicly gay was a stimulus response the level hate him ele- helped That practice of non-accept- behaviouralism. Permitting a vate to. What is succinctly ance was pathetic then, mak- man who represents only is that disturbing* this all to ing it only the more so now. money and power be elect- seems to be in the leading Traditions are important to ed commander-in-chief and to direction of classic Orwellian some aspects of culture and use religious zeal and belief manufactured orthodoxy. identity, but not to under- as a platform for false-truths their 8. Humiliating pets by 7. to records. This It truly is a dis- Listening Enya uniquely standing' and perceiving* the is diabolically clever and them into Tarts be and nestling Pop activity might possibly more appointing* disconcerting- world. Yet somehow Bush deliberately frightening. For situation. There is boxes and than no to those Americans, vote taking photos revolting #10. easy manages continually per- all to rid ourselves of such way sonify the impossibility of Satan for President (or if well-orches- petty (though reason. you're slightly more daring, gibberish that ends trated) Unfortunately it appears vote Nader).

Letters to The Cord [email protected]

And I tilt it to the that. Just One more time right. thought you'd say

Every time I wear it, it is tilt- Because together we'll see ed to the what happens... together. The 81st and just one more, right. The whole 9?? or do we start the end now? I baggy pants Why???" style, so I've heard, originat- I'M CRYING SO HARD have yet to read the entire ed from a bunch of dudes RIGHT NOW article. I have set it down to

tribute to their bud- If I ever lost one of hide from the pain every paying my in who not time. dies jail were brothers...

allowedbelts. This hurts so much, but I I am 21 on International 6. The most likely option: getting 5. Organizing their locks of YOU WILL HAVE YOUR have to it. I have to Women's An to approach drunk until day. omen my they puke at a loca- Fabio's hair collections... while DESPAIR IF YOU CAN'T ask the seemingly open-mindedness questions. tion other than the Turret crying CONTROL YOUR GUN. and desire for... I don't even Why?

know I WANT TO SAY I HATE He was a superhero who what to call it any- I YOU FOR IT, BUT I CAN'T. I never found his cape. But more. It's something-, and it can't hate. bet I'm about that. I'm be over for me wrong may today , So I tilt hat to the sure he knew how to in tomorrow or the next. So my fly

And I'm sure are his as he could... from here on in I will think right. you way. only

the same as I he is. for me on behalf of all. doing thing. hope

I wish I invited you to my I hope. I am a friendly stranger, instead of His were his you took away a friend or foe birthday party eyes guide,

I wouldn't... just as I wish would who I had not yet met. We telling you just yours I for mine. to hurt you. wish we were be, as I look could have argued or agreed, in but with friends. So it's happening Haiti, cooperation comes I wish lot and and ideas... and when these ideas a lately. Uganda. 24. "Why? And then?" Afghanistan, and Iraq, are applied we continue to "Because it is there". Because from towards... and step wrong well from WE are here! Why do I have Just one more time? away wrong is a to beside each hat wont let be start we should yell, we are My me a finally try. and other. do we of it ever So I bought a cap the every Why part anymore... But I will never leave other It has a 'P' on it. I forget? again. 4. 3. Hugging a loved one, or creat- day. Building a matter-manipulat- He was 24 and shot these problems behindor the thought that was funny you will enable ing world peace. If cats and dogs ing machine, which in because since I the him the head! Why? questions unasked. can't we? dropped that rose to be in Sinise's can get along, why put ass Because his was there, and I meds, marijuana (as my carry my passport you couldn't find yours? around just in ease I need to body desires it) is what didn't ask save from the void seems to have helped the Why you yourself myself Just most. why? one more time. one more time.

If ever want to do it For now I But the 'P' is no longer fox- you hope... throw loaded pot. It's for whatever I want; again, your Never Again... in pants, and let's For Now. the anchor symbolism of my gun your for Mike Martino hat go a walk. Why? I is... peace of mind.

How will you spend your Thursday nights now that the Turret

is closing* its doors to the pre-weekend riff-raff. Probably the

same way you did before: by not going to the Turret and fore

ing it to close its doors to the absent riff-raff. But why not write

2. Perfecting their Lite Brite craft 1. Thumb wars us a letter and detail your fun times? [email protected] 8 Opinion Wednesday March 3.2004

The Cord is removed from office on i because of a being its space May proposed Criticism

to the WLUSU plan expand the 24 hour lounge. Considering the amount lounge is used is there for the of of now, justification displacing primary source campus part information to create more The Cord documented the lounge space? space usage volunteer throughout the course of a day on this past Tuesday

process

Editor in Chief

Wilbur McLean

The beauty of Laurier as a

school so heavily focused 011 volunteerism is the profes-

what is sionalism of pro- duced. The Fringe Festival

and Fashion "n Motion are

volunteer-driven events, but

the that is performance pro- duced could 9 am likely pass for a professionally-created affair.

Try telling any of the vol- unteers involved in these

events that what they're doing is "just" low-budget, second-rate volunteer work;

if to you manage escape from

the conversation alive, let me know what happened. From the sets to the music

to the acting/dancing to the hours hours upon of hard work put in by the creators of

of Laurier's most some appre- ciated volunteer productions,

nobody may be getting paid but everything else bears lit- tle difference from what is

deemed professional. These opportunities make Laurier unique.

What is continually sur- 11 am prising then, is the negative reaction received from these

volunteers annually after

having their performances reviewed in The Cord.

What needs to be under-

stood is that criticism is part

of the process of being appre-

ciated as a near-professional quality performance. Proportionally increasing' with the amount of work put

into making Fringe or Fashion 'n Motion profession- the al productions are expec- tations of the production itself.

Alas, if the volunteers

involved in these productions

have the opportunity to expe- rience near-professionalism

in other every aspect of their 1 criticism, of pm show, a key part being a professional should

be included as well. Stereotypically, what is

the first thing an actor or dancer does the morning after opening night? Read

the reviews in the newspaper,

for better or worst.

Despite what many believe, The Cord is not in the business of disliking volun- teer performances for sport. Rather, when performanc-

es are as good as the ones produced at this school, they deserve to be reviewed.

Being reviewed as pieces of performance art instead of subpar, volunteer-run school plays gives legitimacy to the productions being presented. 3 There is really no reason pm for The Cord to condescend-

ingly point out how hard the

volunteers worked or what

charity the proceeds are going to when reviewing a

performance; doing so deval- it ues the production for what really is: performance art with high production value. Nobody would think it

reasonable for The Toronto

Star to give a five star review it to a bad movie because

seemed like everybody

involved was trying really

hard.

The Cord continues to review volunteer performanc- the es because we respect pro- what fessionalism of is pro- duced .

If we we did anything else, 5 would be rude. pm just Opinion wmNFSDAY MARCH 3.2004 9

Passover Passion of the Christ?

history lias been written claim is based on nothing- by Are of of Thou Christians, the serious criticisms the Jews are any more then heated opinion responsible for pushing the and First of all, it is shan't Gibson's films anger, Romans into killing Jesus. So latest justified? important to know that why be surprised when a Jewish people living during fixion of Jesus? has hard-core Christian makes a Religion the time of Jesus sentenced

Jeffrey WWJD? been a of hot dis- movie based on recorded always topic him to death as a result of a

Christian cussion, so a film Hawkins history that con- obviously vote raised by Pontius Pilate, with this much firms their Christian beliefs? plagued con- Even if Jewish people of the If the film didn't portray the troversy seems unnecessary. time killed Jesus, that is not I'm getting really tired of Jewish involvement If box office sales are the in the with cru- any message portrayed about how anti- hearing- David indication, the is cifying Jesus, it would deny controversy Bible and in the film, Mel Gibson's new film Semitic as a boost to Gibson's the story that was written Ricci acting Jesus' death is a symbol of This is a classic of if is. ease bank account and according to the Gospels. reputation sacrifice for the sins commit- didn't like the book, you in In fact, I was surprised to Hollywood. ted by the world. I firmly you're not going to like the On Ash Wednesday, the high- read that Gibson took out the Others believe that believe that Gibson's intent movie. If didn't like the film The you ly anticipated Gibson's film is a shame- most controversial line: "His just was to illustrate that point to fact that in some gospels the Passion of The Christ was be less of Christian the blood on us and on our piece propa- masses. Regardless of to Jews are blamed for provok- released a slew of precon- children" (Matthew 27:25). ganda being* used as a who drove the nails into his the crucifixion to ceived critism direc- ing hap- against recruitment tool This claim Jesus' is Obviously it was Gibson's frail body, death a then in tor Mel Gibson. the pen. why god's name Labeling is not ridiculous, but intention to take the line out only symbol of sacrifice and love film as anti-Semitic and are you surprised that It's trivial to show that no group utterly pointless. for the world. As for the Gibson showed what is writ- ridiculously violent, religious to be to label this film as deserves singled out as propa- extreme portrayal of his tor- ten in those the very Gospels? Christ-killers. groups protested against To think that Gibson film I personally ganda. ture and death, the accu- to release of the film. Were these Were you expecting see a would make film to would have left it in to keep a just rately portrays the physical of ideas about The portrayal the Jews groups' few non-Christians happy with the theme of the film, lead a torture that Jesus faced Passion based truth feeling bad for Jesus, consol- on or into his fan club is absurd. but that's just me. I can clear- before his death on the cross. him his time of uneducated idating in just opinions? This claim Gibson, ly understand why Mel took against I believe that there are need after the Romans ruth- After ail, of the many protest- like others, is based on it out. But I find I most inter- many three kinds of people who lashed and beat him? to lessly ing groups are refusing but heated esting that Gibson actually nothing opinion. will watch this movie: those watch the dismiss- If you were expecting to even film, did leave the words in, as who believe, those who don't chance have of not see the Jews responsible ing any they words only. The line was still believe and those who will for the death of Jesus, then holding an educated opinion. If box office sales said, but no words were writ- watch it with an objective why see the film? The entire A movie about Jesus, let ten for the audience. In the midst of the con- are indication, eye. movie is based on the final 12 alone about anything remote- any Personally, I think all of troversy surrounding this hours of Jesus' life, which ly religious, will always the is lies the controversy that is sur- controversy unique cinematic release begins with the Jewish cause a few eyebrows to raise. rounding the film is nothing a message of sacrifice and Gibson's boost guards finding Jesus in the In case, millions of acting as a more than nitpicky people love. If you filter our the false forest, the Jews handing him eyebrows have risen in talking about nitpicky to Gibson's bank comments surrounding the over to Pontius Pilate, and to his movie that is response it things. Get over it! film and watch it for what the Jews demanding that, based on the last twelve account.

know - the You what...stop the is a portrayal of last even after the horrific Roman hours of Jesus' life. bullshit, we all have bad his- twelve hours of Jesus' life - lashings, Jesus be crucified. Everyone, regardless of would to The most serious of the stun- tory and we all like you will see a visually to see has Why expect anything religious background, criticisms "The rewrite history for present against ning and powerful film. But different? bent out to about this Why get something say Passion" has been Gibson's generations, so they won't the bottom line is that instead of when we have all movie. After seeing the high- shape, portrayal of Jewish in know about our horrible past. people of interpreting other people's known that this is what is film. I can ly anticipated say his film. Gibson as But that just isn't good histo- Labeling opinions as the truth, you recorded to have happened? that the controversy sur- to anti-Semitic, Jewish and ry. And it's never going many should pay the 12 bucks I just don't understand rounding it only clouds the have it happen. Too many people wit- organizations argued see for yourself so you can so are simple meaning that Gibson why many people get- what others that his film them ness are doing portrays form your own opinion. off about film was to ting pissed a trying portray. as for the death every day. Someday every- responsible that's had its Is it the time for a screenplay in right of Jesus. Once this one's story will be told, but again, film the public eye since the disci- dealing with the cruci- not in the probably way they ples were able to scribble it would have liked. That's why down hundreds of years ago. the stories are retold, over If you're looking' for anti- and over. If the current crit- Semitism it's there, clearly ics don't like this film, make and no one should deny that, a new one. because it's supposed to be there. to the According way ■9 ROWWAF'S

llLx A. Ijk ■ —«iJ ~ \«»/ /A./ .«*. "v> iif mm ""|jf "j| ijia / adult entertainment

www.princesscinema.com ...where it's all about talent!

THE FOG OF WAR HONDAY AMATEUR STRIP NIGHT

An Errol Morris Film $1000 CASH! 1 ' •"A STUNNING DOCUMENTARY EVERY WEDNESDAY NIGHT about former US secretary of defense Robert S. McNamara that casts new R|MM3SE| I lighton his role in major American political events of the 20th century."

Desson Thomson. WASHINGTON POST * J ■ * BfHIBsMI wet T-SHIRT CONTEST 3^ l "One of the best ifei a * DDI7C^ m / 0 Sli vAwO IKIIIO w I documentaries of this |fuvSi*H *j)0 I or any year." jI yl H&hUULhhS ladies never pay a cover M - I W Kenneth Turan, LOS ANGEIJSS TIMES KING STREET NORTH WATERLOO AT NORTHFIELD Music I "Errol Morris asks all the right questions Tel: 886-7565 I and that is why The Fog of War is such a DhiiiP ethical giass I J riveting documentary.

I Fafederic and Mary Ann Brussat, Spirituality & Health I I FEB2B-IWTOHllTv\o\Afeeks

6 Princess Street West • 885-2950 ETlfflH Located in Uptown Waterloo

2 for 1

Glasses or Contacts

$50.00 off extras

¥' (tinting $25, scratch resistance $25, • T -gm Vs I ■ Complete 30-Hour Seminars $99.00*/ 6pr I anti-reflection $90)

re. ■ Proven V valid with 2 for r . 1 r, .. ~ Test-Taking Strategies I only glasses coupon &>>L leacher I Courses aSSiii (plus fitting) raining I ■ Instruction I * * _ , Personalized Professional ■ Intensive 60-Hour f|f or Program . .. . . _ , , ■ Study Materials _ Comprehensive with this ■ coupon only (coupon classroom Management Techniques , _ Exams ■ Practice rw -i Simulated ■ j . Iff Detailed Lesson Planning p ■ Free Repeat Policy ■ Comprehensive Teaching Materials I with of . . v- 2/04 complete purchase glasses lj , Expires Apr. ■ Personal Tutoring Available ■ * ■ Internationallyno j 112 *r* Recognized Certificate (coupon valid at time of purchase) ■ " Thousands of Satisfied Suidents Job Guarantee Included

■ Thousands of Satisfied Students Oxford Seminars

Oxford Seminars 1-800-269-6719

1-800-269-6719 / 416-924-3240 10 International Wednesday March 3.2004

Karzai: "They are defeated"

But conflicting

reports on Taliban capabilities leave

future unclear

KRIS COTE

Staff Writer

Canadian officials, with their

decision to reduce the num-

ber of troops in Afghanistan from 2,100 to 500, are likely happy to hear the Afghani

President Hamid Karzai pro-

nounce the death of the

Taliban. At a news confer-

ence held with U.S. Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld,

Karzai stated that "We strongly believe, with evi- dence. that they [the Taliban] are defeated. They're gone." Rumsfeld echoed Karzai's

statement, saying "I've not that seen any indication the threat Taliban pose a military to Afghanistan."

"I've not seen any indication that the

Taliban pose a mili-

tary threat to Afghanistan"

Rumsfeld - Donald

Defense US Secretary Contributed Photo

Coalition forces test fire rockets in Karzai's controversial that Afghanistan despite Rumsfeld and claims the Taliban is no longer a threat Yet contradictory reports

are arguing- that not only are me live." tains that that the "Everything exploiting people's pover- against Canadian soldiers. the Taliban alive and func- Local officials military happens in Afghanistan is ty since "the administration Despite these findings, but are flour- tioning', they note that the Taliban offers not terrorist-related." [of the central government] Canadian officials still plan A Taliban-led offen- ishing. soldiers a the of is weak potential motorcy- However, strategy and incapable of con- to reduce the Canadian forces sive Coalition and against an AK-47 assault rifle the Taliban has been to create an in cle, trolling area, therefore Afghanistan by August. is government forces report- and a satellite chaos phone to any- under the rule of the the local people are not rely- Without the coalition forces ed to have been set for one who is to kill and new and them." willing government, so far ing on within the country, it is rec- spring. steal from coalition and it has gov- worked. Coalition ognized that Afghanistan and The southern eastern ernment forces. A successful forces are contained mostly Canadian officials would more than likely be believed be the regions are to strike is rewarded with $265 in the central of city Kabul, caught within a civil war. hotbeds of Taliban activity. while soldiers are and NGO still (Cdn), have withdrawn plan to reduce This scenario played out

in the east, Taliban an extra Notably given $1,200 for their services from outlying after the Soviet invasion of the number of soldiers cross the border coalition killing a or govern- areas. Military officials admit the 1980s, and the interna- between Afghanistan and ment member. Where that Taliban have many leaders forces stationed in tional community sat back Pakistan to evade capture. economic are death warrants for opportunities signed while civil war raged Haji Mohammed, a soldier limited, the of in Afghanistan temptation any foreign journalists the raising throughout the 19905. for government forces, these rewards coaxes outer of many areas Afghanistan. fears of a civil war. Should Canadian and coali- that his claims brothers were men to the Taliban ranks. In the small of village tion forces withdraw as beaten by Taliban supporters Karzai that reports the Shah Joy. the people say that planned, this scenario would because of his association and are not are torn between These lootings killings they sup- reports contradict likely occur again, and the with the government. He also related Taliban incursions the or the official and Taliban porting government government could once again claims that he cannot return but rather the work of crimi- the Taliban. Gen. Khan US statements, yet are rein- regain control. to his hometown, since nals and He main- the Taliban bandits. claims that were forced by the recent attacks Taliban forces "would not let

Madrid bomb foiled

threaten to Spain's Basque seperatists in ly response to a govern- ment the increase attacks after foiled bomb request. This was plot first time since 1975 that a

political party was banned in YUSUF FAQIRI responsible for considerable Spain. Cord International bloodshed in Spain's contem- In July 3003 bombs In 1973 the ETA porary past. exploded within minutes of The Basque separatist group assassinated Prime Minister each other in the Spanish Euzkadi Ta Askatasuna Admiral Luis Carrero Blanco resorts of Alicante and is to (ETA) threatening and then again tried to knock Benidorm, injuring' at least extend its campaign against off the leader of the opposi- 13 people. British, Russian tourist Spanish targets from tion with Popular Party a car were and Swedish people the summer season to all- bomb in 1995. in among- the injured round year attacks. Two sus- the Currently ETA has Alicante. In Benidorm, four members pected of the ETA been accused of attempting- to were hurt in a police officers arrested were as headed bomb the they Spanish capital of similar concordant blast. to Madrid in a truck laden Madrid. It was reported that "This is evidently a case of with Government explosives. the two had suspects over two booby-trapped bombs officials believe the men were 500 kg- of explosives in the placed by the terrorist organ- planning an attack in a lead- vehicle. The two suspects ization to multiply the to up Spain's upcoming gen- were within 140 km of the impact," said Spanish eral election. capital when were they Interior Minister Angel The conflict between the and this marks the caught Acebes. Spanish government and the second timein less than three Earlier this summer a let- back to months that Basque people goes an attempted ter was sent to reporters by 1937 when the has been foiled Spanish bombing ETA which stated by the group Fascist leader General Spanish authorities. that they would again try to Franco occupied the Basque Last Christmas. Spanish disrupt tourism and multi- until this country. Up point authorities twarted a planned national companies. There is the a at Basques enjoyed great a Madrid bombing' railway a saying* that in order to put of which degree autonomy station. The United States out fire, one must put water denied. In they are now 1959 and the European Union have on it. What the Spanish gov- the ETA founded was by declared the ETA a terrorist ernment is doing, however, is who aimed nationalists to organization and in March adding- fuel to that fire. create an home- Contributed Photo independent 2003, Spain's Supreme Court land in Spain's Basque the banned ETA's political of the in A supporter Basque movement speaks out Spain region. The ETA has been wing, Batasuna, permanent- International 11 WpdnesdayMarch 3, 2004

to Aid workers attacked Windows

ambushed and ethnic rivalries have pre- UN staffers Sudanese vented in the by peace region. The Sudanese government World UN recoils and reduces aid militia, has played different militia the groups against each other TYLER WILLIAMS area. and against the SPLA to gain Writer The United Staff Nations control of oil-rich areas and decried these attacks and to weaken the SPLA to pre- Last the United to the Sudanese Friday, appealed serve their own grip on Nations suffered another set- and the government power. when aid workers back eight Sudanese People's Liberation Many of the government- attacked were suddenly by Army to put an end to these controlled militias are cen- armed members of an attacks and apprehend the tralized under the protection "unidentified" Sudanese mili- rebels. In response the SPLA of the Sudanese Army. The The incident tia group. responded that it does not task of bringing the entire caused of aid a suspension have details about who country under the rule of the in the after operations area orchestrated the attack and is SPLA, and by extension the UN characterized this the relying on the Verification government, is compounded "deliberate attack as and con- and Monitoring Team for by the fact that the loyalty of certed." details. The Verification more many of the militia is as ten- 20 attack The February and Monitoring Team is uous as the shifting sands. occurred at the harsh of to light detailed monitor any cease- Not to mention the fact that dawn and fire was targeted violations under the many of the other groups are at the aid work- 2003 specifically February peace agree- angry at being left out of the ment ers' temporary headquarters between the govern- ongoing negotiations outside of Nimnim the on ment and the SPLA. between the government and Upper Nile River. The attack the SPLA in Kenya. lasted for "about minutes 20 Unfortunately sec- Every second that every of intense and sustained rifle, ond that relief operations in Contributed Photo and relief machine-gun rocket-pro- operations the Nimnim sector are sus- CARACAS, VENEZUELA, fire". pelled grenade Luckily pended, the 30 000 people in are UN aid workers suspended, the escaped the region are denied basic Demonstrations have coursed through Venezuela both in foot and were not harmed. on 30 000 in human supplies such as President Chavez. # people favour of and in opposition to Hugo Upset They had just arrived at the clean water, vital medical over his and livid anti-Americanism, dissi- the are populist policies scant compound a three days region blankets and referendum oust products, soap, dents tried to petition a presidential to earlier. denied basic cooking materials. Chavez. The National Electoral Council reviewed the signa- The emergency response the security of Although tures to verify that the 2.4 million names were pres- human required team that was attacked con- supplies the UN aid workers was sud- ent and it was decided that the opposition fell short by sisted primarily of workers threatened, it be denly may around 600,000 names. Chavez has angered much of the from the Food and The SPLA has been the refugees of helpless business community with his leftist policies and his recent Agriculture Organization, engaged in determined Sudan who depend on the back threats to cut off oil to the US if they attempt to a coup. the UN Children's Fund and efforts to ally itself with the trickle of supplies that the Currently Venezuela provides cheap oil to embargoed Cuba the World Food different militias Programme that UN provides as their lifeline, many further exacerbating US-Venezuelanrelations. others. These aid the among are supported by govern- that end up paying the ulti- for workers were responsible ment. However since the mate price. and aid to feeding providing start of the civil war, the web about 30 000 people in the of deceit, territorial conflicts

Love thy superpower

Stop Hatin'

Richard Togman

actions and objectives. mentalist regime bent on har-

Whether not Neither the United Now or you agree bouring* terrorism. we c„„,ritaß"to BELGIUM with the US of of face of AKLOIM, policy pre- Nations nor the powers so- the challenge building- its emptive war or foreign called "Old Europe", France free and democratic institu- Belgium's most notorious criminal, Marc Dutroux. recently to In confronted policy objectives, you have and Germany, have accom- tions. Iraq we a confessed to multiple counts of rape and murder. Six young' admit that their tactics have plished anything' remotely tyrannical dictator, now we girls, ranging- in age from 8 to 19, were kidnapped by produced incredible results. comparable since the Second look to reconstruction and Dutroux in the early 19905. The horrific nature of these Since September 11, 2001, World War. future prosperity. Before we crimes has made Dutroux one of the most hated men in the world has shifted drasti- The United States has dreaded WMD proliferation, Belgium and memories of Paul Bernardo and Karla Homolka cally and it's for the better. accomplished all this in just now we embrace inspections seem to be the nearest point of reference. Two of the girls The Taliban have been three years. and the lifting of sanctions. buried were alive in Dutroux's back yard and another two from of There with removed power and Regardless one's specif- are problems died from injuries in Dutroux's cell-like basement. After Afghanistan is in the ic political leanings or one's solution. The choice is process every confession marks seven years of preparation, this a major with of rebuilding on a free and qualms the tactics which problems we prefer. I, turning point as the prosecution moves for life hi prison. democratic base. Sadaam employed to achieve these for one, prefer the problems Hussein has been toppled and ends, America is the force for of reform and reconstruction Iraq is beginning to rebuild freedom and democracy in to fear and repression at the It is and establish a constitution the world today. hands of tyrannical regimes.

that will help build a society American lives being put on Overwhelming American based on liberty and the rule the line to ensure goals such force maintains world order

of law. as nuclear non-proliferation today whether one likes it or not. other institution Libya has agreed to dis- and a free and democratic No or The mantle its biological, chemi- Iraq and Afghanistan. As power can do so. United is inef- cal and nuclear programs well, it is American dollars Nations notoriously and submit to international that fund the United Nations fective at governing and salaries for semblance of inspections. Iran is in the and pay the ensuring any process of releasing all its weapons inspectors. order or power in the world

information on its weapons and no other state is capable of of of mass destruction pro- Neither the UN nor the global projection to grams and submitting to force necessary maintain "Old have international inspections. Europe" an adequate balance. North Korea is in talks to accomplished I am not advocating that halt and dismantle its WMD everyone should love and I do programs. Syria has been anything remotely embrace America but

making overtures to want people to recognize the peace comparable to Israel. Saudi Arabia has immense debt we owe to the America's work in Americans and appreciate Contributed photo announcedplans to hold local #f?A4? AJMD PAKISTAN elections and Pakistan is what they have done for the the last three years actively hunting down its world. The debate and criti- in For the first time 25 years, Iraqi Shiite Muslims were own Islamic insurgents and cism over US policies is con- allowed to mark the of Ashura in Karbala. The is not to structive and as it holy day day aiding in the destruction of This is say that the positive focuses the of Imam Hussein, the of the the on martyrdom son cen- remaining Taliban fac- United States is flawless and adds to essential charac- tral Islamic prophet, Muhammad. The Sunni Muslims which tions. without of a All this while exposing that the world is teristics democracy. 77 of the clashed with the and however the However the blatant hatred represent percent population eliminating a black mar- problems prob- minority Shiites and the event saw at least 182 people die in ket of nuclear and missile lems we confront now are and malevolence towards a mortar attack. In Ashura which too deadly Pakistan, was again technology that flows much better than the prob- America, I see marked lobbed in to Shiite is and with bloodshed as grenades were a through its borders. lems we faced before. In often, unhelpful and two suicide bombs rocked Islamabad. In all All of faced the unwarranted. procession this has been accom- Afghanistan we than 50 were killed and hundred wound- funda- more people over a plished due to United States' problem of a fanatical, ed.

Compiled by Bryn Boyce and Andrew Sachs 12 International Opinion Wednesday March 3. 2004

An Afghani paradox Winning isn't

Asadullah's an example of the best Corporate media (and the everything American government)

would be to this and worst tactics in the war on terror quick spin off as proof that the 'war on terror' is working-, yet it can- would automatically assume Coast to not be seen as this either. that Asadullah hated his Asadullahis caught up in the Cote American captors. They 'American dream' not interrogated him. beat him, because of the 'war on terror,' and secretly transported him but because of the opportuni- around the world. halfway ties Kris he was given by his Yet. he describes his captors guards as a "detainee' at Cote as his friends. His guards at Guantanamo Bay. In North Guantanamo Bay (he was world - trade subsidies and America education is taken International kept at a special site with two like for but Asadullah condescending- dogma Asadullah Rahman, a granted 12- other boys, away from the Editor had never to school 'comparative advantage'. has the gone year-old Afghani boy, influence of the adult "Hey you've found before. His village in your distinction of being the 'detainees') him to Zimbabwe! You're the taught has no schools calling to be Afghanistan youngest person jailed speak English, played foot- best country in the world at and once again he spends his by America its War on by ball with him to Bryn the him. taught sewing- sleeves on days idly watching life Terror; he was ten when he pass play chess and let him watch Boyce Banana Republic shirts... by. Asadullah had never was first Due to imprisoned. movies for the first time. have fun with that." before such lux- the influence of experienced the corporate When he left island the Best of all, this isn't uries like books had (he I cheer for media, some pity for the underdogs. guards him some books, called like gave read the cheating drugs never even Qur'an, In I line Asadullah was but every sport up apparent a football and a chessboard to are considered his American captors cheating. In we assume that his detention gave behind those most shielded take home, him to if urging go him his fact, you're crafty first copy), games enough, was from hope's rays. I like the justified. Corporate to school and be and good. and television. subsidies one-way trade media has yet to truly comeback, the redemption. ques- Those subscribing to lingo become standard Asadullah's story illus- prac- tion the 'War on Terror' or Team 'against all odds'. alternative media are now tice in the world trates the best to combat economic Guantanamo Yet if way There is one Bay. you have been only exception. shocked; they sub- claims that terror; erase the gap between system despite read the alternative media, And only one. jected to countless of free trade and reports rich and those who equality are the story of poor, The Toronto Leafs. upon hearing the cruelty and the senseless- Maple 'the rules'. have and those who have-not. Asadullah, are likely to If they play I cheer no you ness of the current American Unbridled If people throughout the competition become further at matter how down-troddenor angered interventions. sol- American has ever led to and world a decent stan- only pain the American whom enjoyed the 'pigs,' diers are face- deserving opponents portrayed as dard of suffering when it's wielded from have living, something be. To hell with everything you less and mindless interwoven may them, that resembles internationally. Between remotely ours, in read, care about the Leafs six. In subcon- nothing of the American my nations components most of the 'terrorists' would you get arms races. people of the world except scious they're infallible and I military machine. The alter- Between be eliminated. Education and corporations you their The "we" and never own capitalist gain. native media often fails to always say a 'race to the bottom' the of a decent life get of prospect while story Asadullah illustrates the "they" discussing the recognize heterogeneity would be where the most streamlined far more effective at the flaws of both of these team. of the American soldiers, dis- attitudes towards (read: socially and environ- changing This of media sources. course is a pretty regarding them as naive fol- the western world than inva- mentally negligent) compa- Sold into sexual to run-of-the-mill fan slavery lowers of the American mili- sports sions and arrests. Corporate Ny wins. an warlord at the outlook that has Afghan age doctrine. tary media Between portrays an inherent peo- of Asadullah was meshed itself eight, The 'left' and its media Would walk anti-Americanism, this is you up ple you get in a world of yet into head. I brought up that the my predict American between bred from and races He had suffering the to a kid in crime. been trained to incursions mean home Uganda are more likely to envy. Alternative media races. use a he main- por- team all gun, though cause anti- trumps long-term and call him a sore The trays an out-of-control self- problem tains that he never shot in this odd and any- Americanism in the Middle is that both serving military machine, yet one. When he was captured distanced type loser because he's East than they are to solve of the American sol- sports and American he sim- many of by soldiers, the Yet competitive current problems. world devel- diers are decent, starving and you're one for earing peo- self-interest. ply exchanged prison Asadullah, now returned to The of Asadullah are another. ple. story The opment his in problem not? family Afghanistan, based around offers an alternative to Corporate media often corpo- shows longs to return to really rate media and an alternative competition the Arab world as a itself when portrays Guantanamo Bay. He is hard- you to alternative media. but one turns homogenous, anti-American start how ly anti-American, for lie wondering' many out to be inconse- and it entirely block of rage fury, so is dreams of other "we's" one day immigrat- unexplored you quential while the other is of expected that t0... many people ing to the USA. belong- like Canada or the highest importance. the West... and how they Unlike in the world's affect sports your perception of victors and vanquished don't 'win' and 'lose' and 'right' at end to shake IT TAKES ALL TYPES TO MAKE A WORLD line up the and 'wrong-' in world. hands. Of course competition One has coherent and works for BRENDAN JONES two of wonderfully days heavy thunder- a,greed sets of rules and the Staff Writer but... that's about it. storms that sports would leave the other does not. One has an For would blemishes instance, you indistinguishable. absolute and .recognized walk to kid in up a Uganda other authority, the lias an call and him a sore loser Mitrowave For Fake Cratk = imposed authority. The ref he Sad Mews Bears. because is starving- and Lost blows the only whistle once you're not? Why not just in while and even when he start chanting- "CAN-A-DA! does not Thirty-two year-old Joseph everyone stops CAN-A-DA! CAN-A-DA!"? Bulot was arrested after call- playing. "You a the Louisiana played great ing Sheriffs The international arena is Yov Are Here, game, but no basic liv- Office to he sport, complain had a conglomeration of partici- for Aberdeenshire, Scotland has been off ing supplies you." ripped in trading a pants that (for the most been forced to its Pretty callous, but you change microwave for fake didn't oven part) agree to the name to "Lost Farm" after at know where I'm going. crack-cocaine. Bulot has been rules that exist. Most didn't least five town signs disap- Competition is one time-hon- charged with of even to possession agree exist under a in recent oured traditions that peared years. desper- after certain - drug paraphernalia flag as a part of a officials were reluc- needs some Village sheriffs if ately paring asking a deputy certain group. tant to the date at down in the world. disclose he'd like to see the crack pipe Why do I have to be It part which the new would makes for signs he used to and smoke the riveting- of try a side or team? Why be available for matches but the pickup. crack-cocaine. sports psy- bogus would I want to be against chology of competition you? I don't ever remember Van to between leaches into other of Gogh Heading Sydney Vinny and a helicop- Massive parts Pink, Defeating consciously choosing to If You Want Something Done ter. life and governance. Ones Baby Arrested. cheer for the Leafs... but where Right, Do It Yourself. A 90- the rules are murky here I am. Vincent the and the lOC can't kick foot-high van Gogh Breaking-ln Virgin Mary. A you 53-year-old New Jersey When our gain comes at off the hot air balloon has been fly- podium and take your man has been arrested after another's at expense the ing over suburban Sydney. Clearwater, Florida's Virgin gold medal away. visiting three day care cen- level of basic survival, 'com- to rest rumours that Mary (pictured is Instead of metabolite or Putting above) tres dressed in pink tights petition' is only a cleaner, it final finally no more. After anabolic steroids in was making one and athletes, behaving bizarrely. gentler form of war. the windows their putsch to get back his ear, it appearing on of William Rhode you get economic apparently that the balloon a downtown office in the first was reported building- entered the equivalences day cares wear- would be participating in the just before Christmas in 1996 ing a diaper over his pink and Canberra Balloon Fiesta on remaining- there for leotards and began defecat- March 6. This is a stare down eight years an unknown ing and urinating- in front of assailant recently parents, children and staff. broke all nine glass When asked about his odd that to panels came behavior Rhode's replied in be Mary's surrogate all three cases that he was home. The appari- seeking- a job. had tion been a mixed blessing to Damn You Barbie ■ wielding the people of Texans. Clearwater. In 1997

a scuffle between A man, clad in black clothes local police and a and a ski mask, has been Polish immigrant knocking on women's doors. ignited after the He doesn't say anything but man had been seen instead just continues knock-

acting strangely and ing frantically waving a outside the build- Barbie doll. Once the door is ing; it ended in his opened the man flees over the death. Past backyard fence. He has yet to attempts to tarnish be apprehended. Mary have drawn WednesdayMarch 3.2004 International Opinion 13

Sabre In limbo, not en route

Haitian his exile to the Central Newly empowered military African Republic. Little hope Hm remained in Haiti since his rebels not to Haiti likely improve re-election in 2000. While the man was once a -*%r wMgs^m French, and UN that is Bitter Ex- troops who priest, many claim he will be S "x peacekeeping fox- better described as a devil. At

Director months to come. best, he has been accused of While the situation in being- uncompromising'; at Haiti is he shameless definitely not a clear worst was accused of rig- A attempt to spark international debate on campus one, it is not caused simply ging the 2000 elections that Michael by the failings of one man. brought his "Lavalas" party Borrelli Do the recent Western-backed Like other fol- to many people power by garnering an lowing these events, I find it unbelievable 92% of the vote. difficult to interpret Since then, Aristide had been exiles of Haitian President Democracy doesn't come Aristide's ousting at the dogged by allegations of cor- Its is a cheaply. history hands of ex-military and ruption, intimidation and Jean-Bertrand Aristide and one, with suc- bloody spotted officials. police Aristide is worst of all, the use of death cesses and failures along the branded fiend and now a but he squads street gangs to Liberia's Charles often it a set a way, and takes Taylor was also proclaimed a sav- eliminate political opponents. heavy dose of for a autocracy iour a little more than 10 All of this seems unthinkable country to be ready for self- for years ago. coining from a man of God dangerous precedent gov- Whether or not governance. How could a priest from who was once referred to as Haitians took a step towards ernment in the slums of" Port-au-Prince, the Nelson Mandela of Haiti. stability young a better life this past week a man who stood up for the On the other hand though, will be for time to tell, but in the who rights of workers the same man was also democracies? Who decides the meantime will have they for toiled pennies in the expelled from his Catholic their hands full dealing with country's sweatshops (pro- order because of worries that which leaders are driven a society to anarchy legitimate, ducing Disney apparel he was inciting violence. the by yet another coup in among others), become so While history is never cut the the international politically turbulent citizen or despised by his own people? and dry, it is fairly clear now Caribbean country. The current crisis in Haiti that those same death squads On Sunday, the legitimate- his is among other things the that Aristide once used to community? ly elected President of Haiti, culmination of 200 of years advantage have come back to Jean-Bertrand Aristide fled Send dictatorship, misrule, and haunt him. Along with mem- thoughts to [email protected] the in the face of an country The turbu- bers of former poverty. country's the coup-prone assault by rebels and interna- lent history began with military which he disbanded tional Aristide, a pressure. Columbus' of discovery the in 1995, they have spent the former priest who worked in island which Haiti and the past weeks taking control of the country's sprawling Dominican Republic now the country, by means of slums and shanty-towns for share. Along the way, the mass looting, vigilante jus- before years being elected, country's people suffered tice, and brutal violence. his and saw power support through French colonial While these soldiers and base erode at the hands of rule, slavery, two American killers are preaching the rebel groups consisting of occupations, dictatorship at same liberation gospel that disbanded military personnel the hands of the Duvalier Aristide once did, it is far former and street-gang mem- family and the heavy-handed from likely that they will bers. of oppression poverty. Then bring any good to this desti- Now that he has left, the in the 1980s Aristide tute nation. 1 want to hope fate of the country rests on emerged, promising to bring that this is an autocratic blip the shoulders of a constitu- better to a life Haitians, the on the course to a freer tional successor, Supreme poorest people in the hemi- future but democracy at the Court Justice Boniface k^lsiWsm " ' sphere. barrel of a gun is a bad bet Alexandre, who will hopeful- But it is unlikely that and democracy at the hands ly be able to work with the Aristide took much hope with of a death squad even worse. rebels as well as American, him Sunday when he began His worM is no playground*

Halifax London Frankfurt Athens Sydney Johannesburg I $118 $419 $509 $849 $1079 $1239 |

(Heathrow)

Vancouver Amsterdam Paris San Jose Auckland Round the World I $249 $499 $519 $627 $1299 $2299 I

(Costa Rica) (Free Stop in Sydney) (Up to 8 stops)

c ' Landing in Sydney? 'j| Landing in New York? SffiS I

* ~ sasaaa mulli-bcddcd accommodation. 2 nigtr.v twin accommodation, bivakkM. admission lo 3 *i, < 3 fights I ■v•. ■ ~ . 1

breakfast, city tour and 1 dinne-! 'he i mpire State Holding & Museun of Natural History.

I If pjjj| Top Deck Europe Tours FJ Don't forget protection

igjjr~ Visil & s ave to $400 1 Europe's hot-spots up | Bon Voyage. Travel insurance

""rawl HITS Oar.rjinn F h approximate. and cpp°ncin: on rnle o*" pxrhnngp. s ovvripri & opent»d ->y * f >p »:-«=rrjtior of Sidrsants. 14 Feature Wednesday March 3.2004

Women in theArts

Literary women have redefined genres

Heather in women authors have subverted and how examines several ways which genres they have brought unique perspectives to their work previously unexperienced in literature

and of the man is considered frustrations confusions couple rids the castle of all structured to maintain male by This to of womanhood in literature Literary the stairs and ladders and dominance. gave men each be more important

climb each other's hair to the to define what it than else in their can strengthen a woman's up power anything Musings confidence and get inside. meant to be a woman, and to lives. Morrison challenges identity, of old of her social One night, Rapunzel's outline boundaries of good the stereotypes silly understanding-

Heather and behaviour for women the reader situation. husband puts on a dress, and bad by forcing who to the The mistake that Sweeney pretending to be her woman- women. The women understand through biggest he climbs her hair have braved the blank of the women's lives the man made, a lover, up page story according' patri- roots archal in and ties her to a chair until and created a space for a of bitterness, rivalry figure Margaret think that the story of home. The and Atwood's The Handmaid's If yon her time lover gets uniquely feminine voice in and pride. building- is to Rapunzel a love story Then he hits the lover over literature have acquired the maintaining of' interpersonal Tale, was teaching women between to womanhood read. is a mutually consenting the head, throws her out the power define relationships are traditional- Writing powerful who het- be tool. in adults experience window and takes Rapunzel and other issues such as ly considered to trivial Participating literary erosexual it's because with him. class matters of the 'weaker discourse allows women to love, away motherhood, gender, sex', heard their define womanhood and you haven't Rapunzel's The traditional version of and race-relations from their who are governed by version of the Jeanette creat- story. Rapunzel was, of course, own perspective. emotions. Morrison, however, empowers women by

Winterson re-writes of This is torn defines love and as to establish iden- many written by a man. Two women are apart sympathy ing a means Grimm's and tities for themselves. patriarchal fairy why the original story over their competition for a essential to happiness the tales through perspec- depicts Rapunzel as grateful- man's love in Toni Morrison's fulfillment. Winterson's re-writing of the heroines in her Mrs. tales, tives of ly rescued from a horrible old latest novel Love. The novel Virginia Woolf's patriarchal fairy novel the Each live with two ladies Morrison's tale of Sexing Cherry. witch to a good- opens with old Dalloway portrays a woman cautionary of the "live into who wonders if a suc- to live to a male women happily looking guy who breaks holding petty grudges being trying up after... Obut not with definition of ever her bedroom because he saw against one another and the cessful hostess is worth- womanhood, their husbands." her from her window and reader is invited to be while. In the traditional and Woolf's doubting the

is as a hostess Rapunzel portrayed thought she was really hot. annoyed with the women for sense, being a good validity of her successful who is forced into bitterness. the makes her dis- woman Is this what passes for their trivial As a good woman. femininity are important marriage with a disagreeable romance? story unfolds, however, the She struggles with her iden- cussions on the experience of and leaves him for man a While the majority of reader is moved to sympathy tity, however, and wonders if being a woman. These falls hi with. woman she love canonical texts in English for childhood friends who her life devoted to becoming authors voice significant The lovers move into a for hun- successful 'woman' has for and gigan- are written by men, destroy their friendship a issues women invite tic and in order to dreds of the nature of their of been worthwhile. Similar to the reader to realize their castle, years through jealousy one out who want keep the people the world was almost wholly another. really great girl-talk, own struggle by identifying to call them the nasty names, defined by men and was The love and admiration expressing the joys, sorrows. with characters. Way GirlPlayat Portfolio Chronicleralex)&ofWriter/artist Lay

obstruc- Carol Lay

tion was

has conquer- Carol Lay been one of my ing her favourite cartoonists since I

fear of the discovered her strip, unknown, "WayLay', on Salon.com some "In time ago. Her black and

white panels tell a story in

2001 I did April one quick minute that sur- BRIAN the scariest thing passes the bright Crayola- J. I imaginable; gave drivel that D'SOUZA inspired passes a secure, for in the and Staff Writer up presti- comedy weekly in gious position a corpo- daily newspapers. rate to free- into the Alex Beauchamp career pursue Her arrival world lance With no writing. expe- was a harsh journey through rience, savings or leads I the superficial and judgmen- Alex Beauchamp was tal world we are all sen- depressed at her job as a cor- tenced to. In her teens, she porate secretary, and didn't "I relied heavily on described herself want to mask her unhappi- as someone the belief that with "zits, braces, ness with Prozac. Instead, writing ugly glass- es, excess fat, she switched careers and was what I was meant writer. hand-me-downs. best- became a freelance My friend the to do" was a horse." This She did so on encourage- downtime didn't last ment of a Tarot card reader long, -Alex Beauchamp of and the time she came of and the people in her life who by she was producing art had told her she was a bril- girlatplay.com age

that no wanted to for liant writer. Fighting her one buy LA childhood demons of skepti- trendy galleries. After cal and abusive teachers who scraping through a string of condemned her drawings to jobs producing relied heavily on the belief commercial art for Mattel, the waste-paper basket, she I that writing was what was DC Comics and she with a Disney, eventually emerged meant to do." The inspira- abandoned the dead end that large measure of success and tional and instructional jour- was production line work security attained through her not to nal of progression, and to her her artistic and creative tal- began produce

mention numerous comic strip. runs in ents. 'WayLay' resources, can be found at the was no US, Hong Kong, The leap of faith girlatplay. com. Singapore, Gibraltar, Japan cakewalk; it required enor- and Norway. mous sacrifices. Her main WmMFSDAY MARCH 3. 2004 Feature 15 Music

Ani DiFranco she's also featured such also caused her to form her that her fans are not lis- Liz Phair just artists as Prince, Maceo own record company, tening without the message.

in No discussion of women in Parker and Babe Records. Her On her website, I'd include Liz Phair my Andy Righteous righteous- music is who she record is also home she has list of favourites just on the complete without Stochansky, played company baberecords.com, a artists Bitch and section for strength of her debut, Exile the account of the whirlwind with on no less than three to such as people who want force that is Ani Difranco. In albums. Animal, a performance duo to get involved but don't in Guyville. The songs are Ani kicked it all off Though she be a bril- from New York who wrote know where to start. Her raw enough, lyrically and 1991, may

to with her debut self-titled liant artist, what Manifesto", Kurt such as "Lost Woman musically, appease the recording "Pussy songs, album. Ani's she be best known for is and the won- "Letter to a John" and rock chick in me, but also poetic lyricism may Swinghammer song",

It's and fierce won her the her live shows. Her 1996 live derful Hammell on Trial, "Serpintine", focus on the unfailingly catchy. one style double album In is another fierce who of her nation and of those rare albums that I ears of many listeners who Living Clip performer politics beg "I were tired of the folk a staple of quality CD col- wrote one of favourites, her fans to join her in the can always listen to and wimpy any my lection. In also hate kid". If the Little love start to finish. And she singers. The Little Living Clip was your fight. Folksinger

has evolved in her nominated for a Grammy. With a successful record is the soundtrack to action, has never had any qualms Folksinger I'm the What makes her shows so and 18 CDs in 14 a little revolution- about asserting her explicit style over years, moving company happy fantastic is Ani's ferocious Ani is no to ist. sexuality in her music. It from the solo acoustic sound years, stranger

and banter. success and hard work, hasn't come without a back- of her earlier albums, energy bumbling yet Not she has been she asks that her fans do not lash though. She has been Imperfectly and So Soft, to Though per- -Alysia Wyville

a full forming for over a decade, forget that there is work to alternately criticized for piece band with horns in Little Plastic Castles and her desire to interact with be done. As a feminist and a her latest album for being To the audience has not dimin- of and too sexual for her and the Teeth. On her albums, supporter peace jus- age ished. It is this that tice, Ani wants to be sure status as a mother, and sell- passion ing-out. This is just anoth- of er example the ridicu- SIMONH SAYS: lous prejudice and opposi- HP9BH

tion women face - like it or

not, moms have sex too. WRITE FOR «■ like Lyrics "Give me your CORD FEATURES. Hk 'Wm hot white cum" don't really .

scream 'mainstream audi-

ence grab' to me, email: [email protected] paßSf 112 tiSS

-Carly Beath

Sarah Slean

Some people are great in

your CD player but put on disappointing live shows, twenty-five year-old Sarah

Slean is not one of them.

She makes albums full of

whimsical Tori Amos-ish

(but even better) songs and

puts on one of the best live

shows I've ever seen. It's in with hard to properly describe your her amazing voice; heaven-

ly or magical might be a start. She also gets bonus points for graciously sign-

ing a very strangely

addressed autograph as a and joke for my friend, for her song "Sweet Ones" which epitomizes sauciness and be of the may one greatest songs ever writ- walk out with ten. Contributed Photo your

Difranco is female musician unafraid to her mind and -CB Ani a speak produce edgy music. i liv#lliCW Does Oscar like women?

SHERRY-LYNN MCKEVER twenty-something' who find director and producer previ- Cord Features each other in Tokyo, also ously best known for writing snagged her nominations for and directing The Virgin When thinking about the Best Picture and Best Suicides (1999) has finally

- herself Oscars, one typically con- Original Screenplay she distinguished as

nects - the event minus best won the latter award. In her someone to not only watch, supporting and leading acceptance speech, Coppolla but anticipate.

actress - with men. Oscar stated quite humbly, It is unfortunate that in of himself, in all his golden "Everyone needs a muse; the sea action-packed glory, stands as the erect mine was Bill Murray," but adventures created by the symbol of patriarchal cine- beyond the superb role Camerons, Spielbergs and matic achievement. This Murray plays, this film Jacksons of the film indus- year, however, I was pleased stands on its own as one of try, that the unique work of to see Sofia Coppolla shine the most brilliantly under- more female directors does through the throng of stated films recently made. not get noticed. Hopefully

Armani tuxedos and become For a woman living in the this most recent win by the first American woman to shadow of her famous father, Sophia Coppolla will encour- be nominated the movie- in the Best Francis Ford Coppola, age the Academy and Director to succeed must be alike to continue Category. pressure goers Her exquisite film Lost In immense but Sophia remains, rewarding female filmmak-

Translation, about a man like her film, understated ers for their efforts - the mid-life is going though a cri- and elegant in the Hollywood recognition certainly long sis and a bored and lonely spotlight. The actress, writer. overdue.

Women breaking into comics

—Mi ALYSIA WYVILLE tion, which she studied at the her Little Lulu comics. I' '*"",IP Staff Writer San Fransisco Art Institute. Friends of Lulu is an organi-

"It's cheaper. It's just ink and zation promoting- women in To my great pleasure, there paper." comics. The New York are a lot more women in Her g'othic style and content branch of Friends of Lulu comics call 1 800 HRBLOCK nowadays. Not the is reminiscent of Edward has published an anthology spandex favourite called Broad that wearing-, gig-antic- Gorey, everyone's Appeal or visit srhloek ca I breasted, erect-nippled minister of the macabre. The showcases all the normal women found in but heroines, comics, willowy figures and surreal- aspects of comics: serious women cartoonists. villains and seductresses. ist style of Dame Darcy are Une of favourites But think the my is Dame almost as fun as her rendi- if you women Uarcy, a to the seduc- cartoonist, a banjo tions of old murder ballads are going be H&R BLOCK player and a lover of murder Dame tresses of male think and sea shanties. comics, ballads. Her best comic Meatcake Darcy is also a member of again. I think it's put has been a of I I "I favourite mine Friends of Lulu, founded by when say enjoyed was a

who must years. Dame Darcy chose MacDonald who named Love Zombie". 'Restrictions apply. Students qualify be 'full time" Heidi Teenaged with attendance of four months at or more a university or college. comics over film Offerexpires soon and is good only at participating offices. and anima- it after the main character in Seeofficefor details. 16 Student Life Wednesday March 3.2004

A myriad of living options

LAUREN THOMPSON much the ten- so potential as long as system. This keeps ERIKA IVANIC out. you maintain certain codes of ants safe and the crazies Staff Writers respect and privacy. Having However, this only works smart good friends and living with when tenants are With limited residence them will prove more diffi- enough not to stuff objects in for stu- options upper-year cult than to allow their you may imagine the doorway there a time dents, comes to when in without to you discover many friends having' leave this haven and enter unanticipated habits. ring the buzzer. Apartments the precarious hunt for stu- Remember that relationships generally tend to be satisfac- dent housing. are in a constant state of torily soundproof with the flux; they need time and real occasional seeping- through House listening* on both sides in of the bass of a subwoofer or order to work well. the banging of high heels. In contrast to the slow, cum- there Finally, make the house As many benefits as bersome elevators of apart- your own. Decorate, paint the are to renting apartments, ment or sharing a buildings rooms, write jokes on the there are also disadvantages. with a bunch of of triplex walls and keep adding - to it as As a result the landlord strangers, a house the in the renting year progresses. Create often living building a to gives you place really and he or she has constant access challenge your own call own. Your own will to the the your norms. Perhaps you building' having front door. a become to do at yard, possibly so close that you right repairs any garage and simply more include begin to refer to your room- time, which may shutting off the water or ren- ovating an apartment over This often your own. occurs without real any warning

and can result in a great

inconvenience.

Apartments tend to be on Jennifer Assselin

the more expensive side of More expensive, but apartments are usually all-inclusive, mak- the rental spectrum. This is yes, the hassle of bills minimal. Note: landlord on often to balance the inclusive ing usually premises.

nature of utilities to ensure to the as ing pay full price over smiling they give you the building covers its costs. lets I looks. summer, but face it, feel peculiar Apartment buildings also pretty safe in stating- that A life with little financial often include bonus features this is nearly an impossibili- responsibilities will stop time for like that must be paid a who needs the ty. so from controlling you. pool, recreational building headache? Without worrying about and underground parking However, returning' to the money for rent, you will have increasing their value. residence life means the more time for yourself and to the extra However, money rules to like what it is want. return of live by do you really those may be worth it to indi- foot- Live life no drinking or playing a simple and you viduals who take advantage in to ball the hallways with the have nothing lose. If you of what is offered to thembut benefits of a free life disap- don't collect many material unfortunately many do not. You pearing. are also possessions, you can live The most annoying fea- reduced the without attached to living among freely being build- ture of any apartment these frosh that may not possess to things. Anything ing is brought to light with the that is to make same vision as you in supposed our high-rise apartment build- does the regards to school or maturity life easier just oppo- ings and the misfortune of but if you are in the same site, so revel in your single being assigned to a unit 011 a mind frame and insist on garbage bag of possessions higher floor. This becomes a lenniter Asselin reliving' your frosh years this on your little corner of disadvantage with the pull of not may pose a problem. University Avenue. Freedom last. house like the be all and end the dreaded fire at Renting a might seem alarms, Another potential disadvan- But what about electricity, to all of student but are for the which is guaranteed occur housing, you ready responsiblity? is not the For and tage having oppor- you may ask? essays when living* with university to choose the tunity your room- such, simply use comput- mates as family, naming* students who do not have mates, which result in available at school. For and freedom to mill may ers space them after your street, say. control of their common some of the discov- live the natural around. Set own problems light, by your rules, the Alberts, the Erbs or even sense when under the influ- ered in first or of the moon and the then break them as your year glow you the Carters. ence of alcohol. This means could mean the addition of a stars on a clear don't please. night; walking' down numerous new set of friends to share you remember how many Yet, with a house a comes flights of stairs and walking the stars visible the lot more university experience were during if the elevators responsibility, Apartments back up them with. blackout? on the agreement Depending are not in working order. with Heating is the only fore- your landlord, There is property are many benefits to This especially trouble- seeable so consider maintenance such as problem, grass renting- an apartment (not in some when at 3:30 in pulled A and street corner alternatives for the winter. cutting- snow tranquil shoveling a multiunit building') as a the morning before a major four fall into hands. All- During the remaining may your student. The most obvious of exam. Picture this: months of the in inclusive rent your guitar case year is a rare find these is that most include sits in front of all need houses, so take the open you as Waterloo, you really among- utilities. It would be impossi- toss in and is some form of shelter to strangers change to put opportunity conserve ener- ble for apartment buildings Upper Year Residence various melodies. over head rain while saving- on util- you play your during gy your that consist of a great num- You have no rent or utilities or other extreme weather ity bills. Turn off the ber determine the lights. of units to Residence available to upper to to and let the pay, no papers sign patterns. Hell, just students year sounds appeal- no landlord to take advan- rain fall down all around you if first ing your experience and the sensation. tage of your status as a stu- enjoy was a good one. It has some dent. What an ideal world. What's stopping" you? advantages that are worth The closest you come to a mentioning. First of all, rent- roommate or neighbour is term is usually paid per as that odd hot-dog vendor who opposed to monthly, so what- at appears your side every so ever money is needed can be often. Other than that, you put out of your mind for the all in can sit day peace, most part. What is remaining watching people walk by and in bank account be your can

used for more entertaining

such drink- purposes as your ing* fund or fast food.

Utilities are all included in

your payment for the resi-

dence experience and some

residences even include inter-

net and cable in their lump sum cost, leaving only the to phone bill worry about,

which is of a miniscule

nature because of the lower

cost of a residence line unless

you have a significant other

that lives a long' distance

away and insists on racking bills. up your phone Most however, is lenniter Asselin noteworthy, the fact that residence leases

Want a student are the the least responsiblity and younger than you telling for eight months that

to turn out residence for size. in school you your lights? Try upper year on we are actually instead of the typical twelve utilities utilized by each unit. month leases outside of television and computers This is beneficial because school that waste our you money whenever keep an take for possible, can relaxing* hour-long* living' quarters that are, on water eye your consump- showers without any sense of for the most part, left vacant- tion and not to raise the or a while for try guilt roommate yelling we go home the heat past twenty degrees at you for wasting* water and summer to return to home

Celsius. cooked meals and childhood money. Jennifer Asselin in such close build- friends. Living quar- Many apartment This is not a problem

ters with four, five, six or The most affordable is a but come winter ings have controlled entry only if we have the fortunate option street corner, you roommates has seven other the of a buzzer luck to find sub-letters will- be to for heat....and through use might willing pay a roof. Student Life 17 Wednesday March 3^2004^

Horoscope Magazine escapism

Week of march 3-9

difference from month to There five on baseball Student are month is the starlet on the alone, who knew? Once again I had ask friend Life cover, I personally have a to my to love/hate relationship with translate their contents. He

I told me about Slam, a Happy Birthday Libra this type of magazine. love maga- to them, and then I hate zine dedicated to basketball, Pisces buy Ssptaiba: 24 - Cco±sr 22 Shannon "Slam is not about bas- myself for it. These are mag- just Kohlmeier azines with headlines like: ketball, the sport, it is about to have to Take the time of You are going 1 out you day "Find out which 'do suits basketball the culture," So. to what to You need make a choice as you pamper yourself. be to you?" and "Have you reached could this equated the want to do on your birthday. to take the time to help your- { Some do it in a movie I culture of Flare? people your sexual prime?" think handbag" to to You are going have more self the little pleasures in i theatre; some do it in Somehow I think would people Cosmo's reach spans across men life. want than you thought. Things you are options the that concourse. Anywhere demographics in a way argue there is no connection, Just make sure that are going to start happening you do is you it, procrastination other magazines don't, per- but is the difference really all oil all of work much when feel caught up your quicker you student something every haps due to, or maybe in that distinct? Men, who read birth- about so can enjoy your good yourself. you loves. The I see it, way maga- spite of, its shallow nature. sports magazines, do so to more. day zines are the perfect to I way In the past few years fantasize about being 6'7" Luckiest day: March 8. because at least procrastinate have noticed an increasing and slamming above the rim,

a you are reading*, number of men's magazines while women who read fash-

that close respectable pastime may which upon inspection ion magazines dream about even teach in to women's all the outfits and you something are very similar buying ies the end, if it is about. size Scorpio IliS (even magazines like Cosmo and sliding into a 2 while y Janet's breasts or at § ,> fantasy Glamour. There are articles they are it.

- Marrfi 21 apcil 19 Cctxber 23 - Ifcverbar 21 baseball When I a I I not into stats). buy on personal hygiene, dating, admit did delve I Cosmo, Flare, magazine get and of course sex. FHM, the Intellectual" magazines, You could be in for a new You will be greatly respected j or the Us To gossipy Weekly. Maxim and Stuff all boast like TIME or Newsweek, relationship soon. Either for recent efforts. You have be honest I have no idea what about which I know exist. Most will enter articles celebrity someone new your achieved a lot and the time the other is in most of maga- who don't I feel like class has will take current women apparently days just life or you a for you to be rewarded is 1 zines on the shelf, so decid- like valuable to the next level. let to wear anything more given me enough relationship coming. But don't any to out who ed try and find than bikini information and I want is lots of to a string (except just There personal success go your head. reads them. for Maxim's last cover model to delve into com- in the next that be hon- something growth coming Show you can One was for certain, thing who wore This is what pletely frivolous. Magazines while. Take the time to reflect oured without being arro- paint.) of the magazines are a we what's many a smart WLU male form of escape, read on going on. gant. very toward the 'mid twen- mine to relax geared friend of said, "(Maxim them get away, and ties' looked demographic has) hot pictures, I just don't dream. Whether that dream Luckiest day: March 5. Luckiest day: March 8. similar. For deceivingly know what they talk about." I is to sleep with J-Lo or just blondes like Jessica example, think that sums it up, these raid her closet depends on seem to sell I Simpson maga- magazines are a toned down what magazine you prefer Taurus Sagittarius zines. On Blender, Jessica with arti- version of Playboy, suppose. wet in little was soaking a cles about drink- i£ril 20 - Vfy 20 ■LfiJi NSuadber 22 - ÜBDsnber 21 toning up, black dress but on Redbook ing beer and listening to Cosmo plus ten years) Be prepared for a dramatic It's time to really focus on (think music. she bone next want was dry, fully There are also racks of change in the while. what you and start clothed, and with her hus- There is going to be a lot making goals to achieve your magazines about sports. than It band. Paris Hilton also more work to do you dreams. is necessary that down considerably anticipated for. If you put a you stay focussed over the stripped for from Elle to whatever next while. Don't let her trip to creative twist anyone will decisions Maxim this month. It you are doing things persuade any men and women work out a lot better. Follow you've made about the future. appears want to about the intuition. read same your celebrities, just in different Luckiest day: March 7. outfits. Luckiest day: March 9. Women's magazines branch into two categories, which I will call: Beauty and Gemini Capricorn g _ Domestic. The domestic mag- include titles like - I azines May 21 - June 21 ~/t\\ Dsoarber 22 January 19 jSlAfi House & Garden and Martha

Don't One event or situation is get stuck on issues. Stewart Living. I had to skim of going to flow right into the You have to stay on top these magazines quickly for work otherwise would I next one with much ease. your you're fear someone think to to become in Things are going start going over- was interested decorating,

than whelmed. Don't let too flowing more naturally yourself that's way 'old' for us. of they have been in the past become distracted. A lot right? Seriously, I could send while. Lots of are into cardiac good things important things going my boyfriend and need you've been waiting for are to happen soon you arrest reading magazines

start to be focused. I going to happening. like that. think these maga-

zines are best left to people March Luckiest day: March 6. Luckiest day: 9. who enjoy coordination from Sororities an early age. pride themselves on glittery bake sale booths and t- Cancer Aquarius matching shirts, as future subscribers

June 22 July 22 fj January 20 - Bstoruary 19 they might as well start

researching now. could Be prepared for a new situa- Too to do many things Examples of beauty maga- tion to work its into leave being stressed out. way your you zines include Cosmopolitan life. If want to do If don't have the time to you some- you and Glamour where the only don't. thing more creative, you will take on any more work, have to do will the opportunity so People around you next too over the while. Expect a understand if you are lot of change in the near busy to help out. Don't feel Pad future. obligated to do so. Weekly drawing

Luckiest day: March 4. Luckiest day: March 7. By Pete Cram

Leo Pisces

- July 23 August 22 Bsbcuary 20 - March 20 1 1

Lots of interesting things are Lots of good things are going going to start happening to to start happening to you.

All Make write down you. kinds of unusual sure you events to wishes are going start hap- any goals or as they like- pening. You are going to are going to be the most have next to make choices over ly to materialise over the what will you need and what you while. Great success

want. Trust if a your intuition come you keep positive when making them. attitude. Luckiest day: March 6. Luckiest day: March 5.

Virgo |lT?I Daniel Roth is a

Ajgjst - 23 Sspteiter 23 Jj{ Journalism graduate of is D°n't Conestoga College and spend anything you don't currently a communica- have to over then next tion studies student At while. In fact, if you can He has stash Wilfrid Laurier. away any extra funds, and that Studied astrology would be the best idea. that You other topics of genre could be in for some 10 inancial for almost years. surprises, you can ueal with them if you don't

overspend now. Luckiest day: March 9. 18 Student Life Wednesday March 3.2004

Indian dessert called Kulfi exit prices for lunch and din- ice is where which is ner servings, which cream made with Food meal. It is unlike for Thought I found my eventual pistachios. North I American ice cream Butter Chicken. Until but was a

in with four nice and moved my change quite good. been a for mainstay years that comes either sweet or this I in a is Indian roommates year. Curry Hurry a per- is the now I ordered an Indian-style salty. appetizer of the fect lunch or dinner was quite unaware spot if restaurant Curry in a from their selection of about Hurry, is into Indian delicacy that Butter you are international destination for this and my eight, my huge vegetable cuisine. It is Chicken ($6.50 lunch, $9.00 especially con- week's review. samosa ($1.50) came to the if dinner), which is basically venient you don't have long sometimes has Curry a table within no time. eat because not chicken in a butter, cream to only was I attached negative to it Samosas are a vari- stigma basically in and out in and curry sauce. My room- no time, but the in North American culture, ety of things like meat, veg- that mates eat it all the time and people came in to get but I would that etables argue people or potatoes wrapped have they not only me take-out orders barely waited who into in This buy that are fact in a thick pastry. crispy hooked but also have made before leaving with their It is simply uncultured. a one was particularly large standards meal. The my quite high only thing they delicious of that and came with a nice sauce, style spice diet of home- need is the One after a steady Card, but be in can prepared a variety and was an excellent starter. cooked butter chicken. they already have the Wat of manners with differing Other appetizers include At lunch it comes with Card, so maybe there is hope tastes and levels of hotness. French fries with DAVE BONE curry I for Laurier rice but ordered some us Curry in a the Entering restaurant, sauce, soup Restaurant Reviewer Mulligatawny Indian flatbread called Nan Hurry fans. you immediately notice that and more tasty teasers vary- to with it. ($1,25) g'o along it is inside. Other from $0.75 - $5.25. There are an very plain ing I overwhelming The meal was superb, and than amount of choices when it a few pictures hanging For main course you your would that self- say even as a 011 the walls and some comes quiet can choose from a selec- to finding a to large place proclaimed Butter Chicken rice eat in the beside the music in background, the tion of and plaza vegetable it met expert, my lofty expec- of dining room is small (10 dishes that include University Waterloo. Not chickpea There tations. are many and does not have like there tables) a and lentil meals Channa only are easily over 15 other entrees featured like lot of character. bever- Dal to eateries and restaurants, For and Shahjana or Spinach Curry and Bhoona feature feature foods from all ages they your typi- Vegetaiian Biryani ranging they which are lamb dishes, and the and cal drinks with Lassi, from $2.50 to $7.25. in over planet are very along Curry other chicken dishes. I many an Indian drink which is also ten item diverse. One that has a Hurry has a place finishedoff with a traditional basically yogurt and water entree menu that has differ-

Have a great summer. Be a U ofT visiting student.

jl

wk \ .#t ■BBSBBBBBH ■riiiiiimmiMM

' «j* m ...•-- -,: — llfllil | .

WKmi--

; " :£:#'' "?SPfeS>

liß H

i| rind &• :| out more -1g 1 ARTS & * web: J sciencl

1 www.wdw.ucoronto.ca/visit Itunivfrsity -

■ K •;/ TORONTO I phone: |HHH|: '' . '' ■1I 416-978-5880 ■■

1 email: [email protected] Woodsworth

University of Toronto

2004 17 - summer session may august K,

RESIDENCE AVAILABLE

-■' - wfdnesday March 3,2004 Student Life 19

27. F1 advertiser

30. Tulkas was of sport

32. Patriots' region abb rev.

33. New Olympic sport

35. Type of skiing

36. Fast throw to an out

37. Underground, illegal fight

Down:

1. Done on sports

2. Tennis move

3. Not win

4. oompou ri d fra ctu re so un d

5. Done with winning

8. Tug-of-

9. Over-Under

10. Inuit sport

12. Type of tennis

15. Rowing equipment

16. Type of athlon

18. Skating org.

13. Bowling target

CROSSWORD 20. Pugilism

21. European skiing area

22. Arcade., almost a sport Across: 17. Horse racing cheating 25. British sport I. Used in Rugby 20. Barroom sport 28. Volleyball fixture

6. Discovery Channel Challenge 23. 2nd place medal abb rev. 29. Swimming measure 7. Rebagliati's item 24. Performance non-enhancing drug 31. Equipment manifest Fraser After event 25. the By King 11. drug Riding 34. On deck

13. USA Horse org. 26. Sumo wrestler Yarnamura

14. Sports vid eogarn e rn ake r

II I MM MM. . 11.11l 11111 l .1111,1. Mil1.1.1J11 1.11 j. II iII 1.1.1MilJII j| ILIIIILI. ILII.I j 111 I^IIIIIJ.lILI.I(I J1.11.U IHI.IIUII.IIIJIIIU J,IIJIWBiilP

gjMB! im i I TwHi I Tin wßrrrm II iM ill

m*2 |g; C*jTiLsj[l.&i .1 *K- M 1 ** i %*| "J

I

"PinbaH" demons - Friday March 3rd - Turret Nightclub 20 Sports Wednesday March 3.2004

Hawks roll on to semifinals

TJ HILL Brock was the the swept by pur- Laurier's top line setting Staff Writer ple and gold in the first tone with two early goals.

round. Col will scored both times

Last Wednesday the OUA Early in the first period of with linemates Brian the in the dropped puck game one the Hawks took Kazarian and Nick Gibson men's varsity hockey playoffs control of the series and adding assists on each. OUA in Thorold, Ontario, as the never looked back. Laurier All Star defensemen Nik

Brock hosted the Richard Vukovic Laurier Badgers right-winger, gave a com- Wilfrid Laurier Golden Colwill, started the engine manding lead when he

Hawks. twice in the scored the and scoring- opening on power play There were many ques- frame to give the Hawks a 2- put the Hawks up three after tions to be answered the by O lead. one period. Hawks into the heading* Brock found a way to put Midwest Division semi-final. three pucks past Laurier net WLI4 Bwcl 3 After an impressive 7-1-1 minder Justin Day but the

start to the regular season Hawks netted three more of the Hawks went to of Merli. on win The Hawks began the sec- their own courtesy only three out of their ond period with the lead and Gibson, and Chris Diubaldo. 15 remaining games. quickly added to it as Rob

During that 15 game Grant cashed in on his own win I Brocfc 3 stretch, the Hawks went win- rebound. Brandon Meiii

less three with in meetings buried one over the shoulder the Badgers. When asked of the Brock goaltender to From start to finish the

whether or not the Laurier three Hawks maintained total players put up heading* con- low www.laurierathletics.com were on confidence head- into the final stanza. trol of this contest and went

into the assis- Brock made it close in to win the 8-8 and ing playoffs, the on game in the second of Justin Day's solid goaltending game a three game tant captain Bill Duncan third but the Hawks the series in convincing' fash- period Brock seal the over the Brock series against helped sweep Badgers. bit said, "Guys were a down, were able to hang- on to take ion. knew if but everybody we of the series 4-3. The marks the sec- to game one sweep chances", said Duncan. forced take their game to

could put it for a venue two ond in as for the together The for game many years The Golden Hawks played another level in order to beat full minutes 60 we could heat- switched to the Waterloo Hawks over Brock. Laurier's the division two solid back-to-back games leading York Brock." Recreation Complex where success in the series was in their first playoff series of Lions for the Midwest final. Despite their Laurier went 8-8-1-2 because "our forwards domi- two struggles, during 2004, something' they haven't Round of the OUA one thatLaurier took nated them down low and positive the regular season. done a lot of lately. Despite a playoffs gets underway into the series with them was Just like one of the from that we were able to cre- March 7:30 game solid effort by everyone Thursday 4, pm the fact that a series two with ate lot of just year ago game began a quality scoring involved, the Hawks will be at the Beatrice Ice Gardens. Women's hockey Lady Hawks march on

hold the fort BERNARD DAWSON began it looked to be a carbon the Hawks were able to play Staff Writer of The at their best from the copy its predecessor. open- Golden Hawks and the ing tip off. The 2004 OUA basketball Marauders played like they Laurier was able to rush The Hawks team relied Lady hockey post-season lias been a deja each did not want to win. out to an early lead and held vu-like experience for the Then finally the Hawks woke on for the first half by play- solid and WLU Women's basketball from their trance and on defence goaltending in up ing tough, in-your-face team. last the This time year began to play to their ability. defense. When the curtain their win against Brock squad got hot at the right Sarah Zagorski stepped closed on the first half, time and went all the to and took the way up over game, Laurier found themselves the CIS play-offs. slashing' through the holding a 38-33 advantage. DEREK IWANUK Mallory. However, the stunned Mac defenseand The second half was much Sports Editor Badgers would comeback giv- S8 81 ing Laurier a late lead. Dee closer as the Mustangs and with a goal of their own when mm Brock Channel' iced the with Golden Hawks in In a season that has had victory engaged a Nig-elle Lag-erwerf beat Stein four free throws in the last titanic For the sec- and the struggle. many ups downs for with a blazing' slap shot to this So far year's OUA two minutes, giving the ond game in a row Sarah Laurier Golden Hawks bring* the Badgers within have looked playoffs eerily Hawks a 58 - 50 win. Zagorski almost willed the women's hockey team. a vic- one. However, Stein and the similar to last season's. The Hawks to a a tory in the quarterfinals over Laurier defence would ham- victory, scoring Golden Hawks into the the Brock came game high 21 points. Badgers was det'i- mer down for the remainder Laurier was able to with a but out a playoffs good Zagorski was helped nately high "point for the of the second period and most unspectacular record and rush out to an by Kerri Jilsen who had 14 team, in what hopes to be a of the third. early then to knock off and 11 rebounds. series of the preceded points high points 011 lead and held on in their path. Laurier was able to hold on to way to the OUA mm 3 Brock 1 anyone This first victim Championship. year's for the first half by the victory and earned a stop the McMaster in Final The last was the OUA West time that the in- who traveled playing tough the Marauders, Wednesday night against the Hawks faced Badgers on Finally, with the seconds from Hamilton to find Brock in only defence. Badgers. The game January 31, St. dying* down and Brock's your-face themselves defeated the Catherines, the by will be played at Brock. Badgers came chances for a tying- goal slip- hometown Hawks. The out and dominated the game firing ping away, Laurier's Laurissa was close until the final min- The reward for the win Golden Hawks in a 5 - 1 vic- Kenworthy finally sealed Will II Western 52 utes when Laurier was final- But over McMaster was a date tory. Friday's game posed Brock's fate by scoring' on an able to away. with the team in the OUA to be a different ly pull top story. empty net with the final sec- During the first half, the West, the Western The winner of that match- to Mustangs. onds ticking away give Hawks looked and sluggish Against the Mustangs all the up will represent the OUA Laurier a 3 - 1 win and an "Brock is a the team shot team missed rushed Hawks did was walk into the West in the OUA final and advancement into the next after rushed shot as they London underdogs and leave earn an invite to the CIS play- that plays hard on round of the playoffs. tried the lead to grab from with a spot in the OUA West offs. But first the Hawks Both goalies played and excep- every shift we the equally bad Marauders. Division finals. have to beat the Badgers, a tionally well during' the Neither could team find their The third time was the team that had their number Laurier's Stein knew we would game. Emily offensive skills and the half charm as the Hawks avenged during- the regular season, stopped 19 of 20 shots and ended with Mac a have to slow them holding 31 their two regular season loss- defeating Laurier twice. Brock's Angie Maliory

- 26 lead. es to the with a 70 33 of 35 shots in an Mustangs down to have a stopped When the second half - 82 win. This time around obvious Laurier offensive

chance." strike.

Next on the road to the -Brandy McMaster-West, OUA championship. the assistant coach University of Toronto Varsity Blues, The Hawks lest both

The Hawks struck hard to the Blues games Varsity and as Candice fast, Djukic by a combined two points, the six with the opened scoring' only one of games going minutes into the opening' into overtime. The question period to give Laurier an that remains is how the

1 - 0 The early advantage, Hawks will overcome a Hawks seemed to be in cruise streak of bad luck they have control from that A point on. had so far with the Varsity solid defensive effort and out- Blues. standing- goaltending- by McMaster-West expressed, Emily Stein seemed to be the her optimism adressing' this anchor for the victory. concern "We have looked over When asked about the some old tapes to see what team's to keys success. has been successful for us.

Assistant coach West We those Brandy are going to use McMaster "We in for said, came successes as strategies with and a game plan we exe- the game." cuted it. Brock is a team that If the Hawks want to con-

hard ev shift and their into plays on y tinue to march way we knew we would have to the CIS final four, they will slow them down have to a have to dig deep and over- chance." come an obstical that has

In the second the overcome Hawks all year. added to their The out period,Laurier story plays Saturday Matt Benassi lead when Jen Heslin rifled a at 4:30 pra at Clarica Arena, Laurier Sarah beats Zagorski a McMaster defender in 58 - 50 The slapshot from the point beat- gaurd Laurier's OUA quarterfinal win. Hawks also the number ranked Western their ing- Brock g-oaltender Angle upset one Mustangs on way to the OUA final. Sports 21 WmNTODAY MARCH 3. 2004

Hawks fall in final seconds

SHAWN PARKER always does, with the home two free shots. He hit the inbound to Innes who would the shot. crowd look to It would fall Staff Writer on their feet in antici- first, missed the second but then obviously pass short, along of first back to Caruso Currie for with the Hawk dreams of pation the bucket. It snagged his own rebound or a is what it all boils minute half from the three But Caruso date with Mac. It So this came a and a in and took the relay pass attempt. playoff was test he in of the most down to: a one game courtesy of Jarman who con- Rob Innes where calmly failed to put the ball play one entertaining

match to earn the right to tinued his hot hand. He drainedthree points. twice and finally had to drop games of the year for the in this Saturday's would finish the with On the he it off in the hands of Lovett- Hawks, but easily the most appear game ensuing play in Hamilton veteran semi final game twenty-five points to lead all stole the ball from the the one Hawk to the frustrating*. All that said, the the vaunted until other- for the last shot. still fantastic to against scorers. Warrior's Jarman, who game was Marauders. The Hawks had mis- not the most watch, and this Hawk McMaster again came that point played Lovett, likely young will to University of Waterloo out misfiring' from in close, take free ball, and hit a wide- player to be taking a three team be poised move and off leaned into his in the next Warriors squaring but they actually looked stur- open lay-up. One minute left, pointer, deeper playoffs to against University Avenue dy on the defensive end. Bert 64-61 Waterloo. defender in an attempt season. draw rivals Wilfrid Laurier Golden Riviere would miss his fair The Warriors then had to a foul, and tossed up share of besides Hawks. close range shots rely on someone will One team earn the early, but was a force on the Jarman to make a shot, and

to one more backside with did that, hit- right play game, coming up Munkley just head into that con- to and will some vital rebounds and two ting a mid range jumper test with the satisfaction of monstrous blocks. put UW back out in front by sending their bitter adver- five. He would finish with 19

home for an early start on the night. saries WLU 63 IW 66 points to their summer workout With thirteen seconds on excitement who regime. Thus the the clock, Todd Cooney,

elimination QUA well but missed a of the single The game seemed over had played of circus shot basketball playoffs. with Waterloo tip by nine myriad Throughout the entire with two minutes left, and attempts going after foul and first half, the Hawks had Laurier couldn't hit a basket calls, drove the lane Warrior trouble with the Warrior low if it still had apples in it. caught every sleep- out to three post game. Stopping the Riviere fouled on a blown ing, expecting see a

Wade Currie ox- entry pass seemed almost call, that instead of sending from either impossible and somehow, WLU off in transition result- Caruso Cooney would be with their vastly undersized ed in two UW free throws. fouled on the play, but he

lineup Waterloo was able to But wait one minute, it would miss a golden opportu- and the take advantage down low and looked like one Hawk still nity to convert,

the Golden Hawks looked had a little wind left under Hawks would still be downby unable to adjust. his wings, and he wasn't three.

about to let Laurier would come back The visiting squad again the game slip to their In the of sixteen to the defensive end and looked three-point away. space

to them in the seconds Chris Caruso looked the ball on a missed game keep regain from and looked contest, with Chris Caruso like Reggie Miller taking on shot UW,

cutting into the 22-11 lead. the New York their season square in the would 6.3 seconds left, down by The sixth year guard Knickerbockers. eye, Matt Benassi

in the fouled three After a be a major factor later He was shooting a points. lengthy Hawks veteran Chris Caruso hits his clutch free throw in the final contest. three, but another blown call timeout battle, the play was

as Caruso looked to seconds of the The hawks fell short three 66 - 63 The half opened, as it by an official awarded him set game. by points Duffett dominant in forecast

the number two and at it in the final four than points. The Ottawa goaltend- challenge of taking on a big- between go of Colin's situation not and faster Brock team. four ranked teams in the see one Lakeheacl or ing is much of a ger down Look duties this Before the series I said nation. Look for Western to Western go early. Corner concern. The year began Laurier out a win in this one for Jeff Martin and Justin were shared between two that the keys to a vic- squeak rested hands of but not much. It is a Davis to come big in this solid goaltenders by the tory in the by up Watt Richard Colwill and shame that teams like contest for Western. name of Jordan and forwards Colin Toronto and Queen's able Mathieu Blanchard. I would Bryan Kazarian. These two are each netted four to make it this far. I'd much Prediction: Western Duffett not be surprised to see both players rather the four best teams goaltenders play in this points in their two contests. see

series. Regardless, my pick is Laurier also had significant still UQTR. I expect Emond contributions from Nick of Gibson and Brandon Merli Last week's to have much more an impact, (if he is able to play ) who also contributed four

I to come Brock. record 4-0. and expect Dallaire points against Laurier next is up big again. s opponent York. In their season series I to the was surprised say PREDICTION: UQTR York had two wins and a tie. least at lust how easy the York also allowed the fourth first round of the playoffs fewest goals during the regu- series Laurier matches due to appeared. Every single up lar season largely in two to ended up a games their goaltender, for- better York great zero in favour of the against victory mer Oshawa General starter I teams picked last week: but it will not be Derek Dolson. York has UQTR, Queen's, Laurier and fantastic talent includ- defeat some Lakehead. enough to ing Daryl Bat and Julian the number nine Smith offensively but Laurier Far East also has the talent to play ranked team in the with the Lions. Their hockey

UQTR easily handled their team still be the country. may Concordia in the opponents Yeoman...I don't know. www.laurierathletics.com first round winning their Colwill, Kazarian, and Merli Fourth Hawk Bill Duncan looks to lead the men's team 3 - 2 and year deep games by scores of all had over 20 points this is 4-0. I into the playoffs. Their next challenge the ninth ranked York Lions. As predicted, Danny Mid-East season and Gibson had 30 to

Dallaire, the UQTR puckstop- lead the team. I didn't like

per, played a pivotal role in This year's mid-east division the Golden Hawks chances these two wins. Over the two final is a repeat of last year's against Brock and they won. 61 games, Dallaire faced final. This division is the I feel as if Laurier matches shots two entire York but it only allowing goals weakest division in the up better against Reminder from the for an in to defeat amazing save percent- OUA. Not a single team will not be enough of 0.967% Luc age Pierre this division had a winning the numbernine ranked team Emond did not play in the record but Toronto did come in the country. Special Needs Office! second this In game against out on top again year. Concordia but his teammates each York their season series, they Prediction:

clearly made up for any loses recorded one win, one loss

that they incurred. Forward A factor in Far West If and one tie. major you are planning on writing Martin Cote, who netted 31 this series is the fact that points in the regular season, Toronto has not played a This is the main event series your Winter 2004 finals was in all four of since here. Either of these UQTR's competitive game one goals in their contest tied could to win the second February 22, when they teams go on to face matter the through Special Needs, help UTQR move on to Queen's 3-3. I expect OUA and for that a much teams are tougher Ottawa Queen's to be much more pre- CIS. These two team. their It'd be worth it book them NOW. pared because of two powerhouses. please these Expect this affair to be a RMC and I to to London to see games against go run and to because it will be gun 1980s also expect Toronto come teams play Edmonton to Oilers type of out flat. Expect Queen's fantastic hockey. game to won't Lakehead completely before where the only way take this series, it just Bookings received on or Thursday, win is to Waterloo in the score more goals be pretty is all. destroyed than 17 March 2004 willl be the other. In their four first round. They scored 18, guaranteed space.

contests this to com- season 39 goals Prediction: Queens goals in two games were scored annihilate our cross- and at least one pletely eam Lakehead for- scored at town rivals, DROP BY ARTS WINS , every game Mid-West ICII, least hat six goals. ward Jeff Richards had a in Ottawa has Laurier in and added an assist a balanced I took a gamble on trick FOR THE FORMS. of .tack with five Brock. 1 - 1 stomping players scor- their series against the 12

over 20 and ten Laurier was Waterloo. Ujg points wasn't sure that Players a match scoring 15 or more to the This is up going to be quite up 22 Entertainment Wednesday March 3.2004

Battling bands wind it down

of Continued from Cover onlooking drunkards. Live

2 Air's lock on victory was thrown into The second band to play suddenly serious doubt. was Lydian. the classic-rock

inspired band that won the Although suspense would be at this I'm previous Music Explosion nice, point just going to go ahead and concert. 1 was happy to see say that One Short took the victo- that Telly the guitar player was in fine form, and the ry. Superfan Edyta Piascik band stole and soon attracted an ener- my post-its wrote the following getic crowd of bouncing girls concluding commentary: "One Short in front of the stage. Their was However, all the bands set contained some good sin- good. were decent. The galong- rock covers and rap/hip hop act is taking over the Lydian generally got shit stage... balls* done, I was somewhat enter- 'They got says Chris. It's that One tained and the good Short won. general popu- 'Anti-climatic' Chris. lace seemed placated. says 'How so?' Soon afterwards, punk act says Edy." Live 2 Air did indeed take One Short took the stage and the and stage attempt an immediately began hammer- These impromptu concluding set to ing' away. guys are the indignation of incredibly melodic in their RadioLaurier staff. After delivery, using- backup vocals the rogue rhymers were tossed. to add new layers to the One Short extreme- singing style that most played an short encore for small-time bands ly a punk gen- greatly diminished crowd and erally adopt. 1 think that One eased out Yee the night with a whim- Short was definitely better Jeff The anti-climax than I had ever seen them per. was all famous! not will look at this for more than a second or two Smile, you're Well, really. Nobody picture clear - I think Edy have before, and the largest crowd may in the Bastards! unless they were actually at the show and think that maybe they're picture themselves. been drunk. Wilfrid yet was jumping around and just Laurier has finally crowned pretending' to mosh right in confidence. members in to set and rendered jumping drop passive its band front of them. The killing- battling king, and The most of or add vocals as they observers instead of active anticipation rhymes One Short has been the blow was a cover of given juiced-up The band the night had to be for the tend to do. Many male mem- enthusiasts. spent a Alanis Morissette's "You task of wiping the floor with performance of highly-touted bers of* the crowd stared at lot of time complaining- about Outta Know which whatever garbage the other 5 ' many of jam band Live 2 Air. the the extremely attractive mic levels and technical prob- will remember from universities toss at us in the you knockout favorite of the female in the white lems, an issue which flared singer future. the ridiculously laughable hours near Although first Music hat. trying to in their original perform- year's Explosion. perhaps pull up final was of teenag'ed angst. However, night somewhat- their Their was something out of her ance, The chorus of setup unusually per- less than I had for, everyone was tipsy and the epic hoped as a result of t he band's formance with which they song repeatedly long closing RadioLaurier's Music song was an amusing blast innumerable members, and could attempt to pick her up echoed the sentiment "We from the that were past made peo- Explosions consistently the crowd to calm afterwards. don't respect you," which I began solid events the ple smile sheepishly as they throughout down the was considered to be a somewhat as process dragged Something wrong'. and next mouthed the words. One year their revival on. Live 2 Air started The crowd was lulled by Live choice considering- Finally sketchy is recommended Short had a solid night and year highly the crowds jamming a mellow tune, band 2 Air's overly mellowed-out volatility of large finished with well deserved (by me).

A skirt glimpse up the Dread this

of Havana vacationed with... if you can Nights remember.

My Take ing- to America, Katey con- country and a revolution is Apparently the lizard is vinces Javier to enter a dance embraced, Katey's father's job not the only thing- that is contest with her worth prospects are no longer broken, for the producers $5000. Javier combines his secure and the family decides the were right on money gyrating moves with Katey's to return to the United States. when it came to naming' this and salsa While in her prim proper rou- pouting* room, particular film - it was noth- to cook tines up steamy Katey's mother presents her ing- short of being dreadful. results that reflect their with memorable, if only light of There was a complete lack growing' lust for each other. advice. As she combs her tangible and understandable The more grinding they do, hair, she refers to the teen's plot. I have seen home the more in sync they become childhood fear: "you can videos with more plot and dis- or (this is both funny and comb the knots, CHOW through ERIC structure than this drivel. you can hide under the bed. Staff Writer turbing). film And moreover, this just Patrick Swayze makes an In all, the film's writing* is simply recycles old jokes and character appearance as the hotel's weak, develop- Club Dread is a private and that the audience APRIL CUNNINGHAM hopes dance instructor and inspires ment lacks depth. swinging* singles-style does not notice - but believe News Editor not to on the Another I could Katey give up thing' island resort on Pleasant me, we do notice. There were contest after her have done without was the where there's noth- twirling Island, few in probably only a Sweaty grinding the heat around times. He is Fashion 'n Motion a few try- self-pro- but alcohol and ing one that deserved of Cuba's to moments a capital hip-sway- to look but in the theatre ing sexy, just moting - before drenched after drug' party chuckle. The other moments Latin beats in ing 1958. An to be appears a sweaty 51- the film began. another. this However, party reserved for at all too familiar of lust- are groaning story But the love year-old man. His place in the by end, the is soon a interrupted by the B.S. that the audience is ful passion and the disap- plot seemed quite unneces- had me at least a little serial killer. The resort story force-fed into is of believing pointment facing reality. The sary. hooked. dancing' was fear then employees losing and I guess The politics of a nation on the funny original. Luna's looks Diego also steamy but we as a result of the nothing jobs after all this time, the brink of revolution, and a turn don't heads, but his boy- haven't seen before (after tourists scared being away satirical glimpse of Patrick Simpsons' presen- Swayze's ish exotic charm is suf- and and likely Britney Spears Enrique consequentially attempt of networks is wrinkly muscles. tation Pox ficient to win over Havana Iglesias videos). to cover the bloodshed. up true and there is no stan- The to the 80s prequel PG-13 audience. The film is not Nights' probably their blockbuster dard of quality for pro- Dirty Dancing Romola Garai, on the other worth trucking' out to the Academic Value not ductions, as this unintelligi- may be an overly enlight- hand is a blonde theatre to But in stunning see. a couple This particular film ble film was actually mass- ening film, but it does give beauty. Her voluptuous months, crank the Wyclef, the up highlights legitimacy distributed by Fox the viewer a fresh slightly well. curves play the part She Black Eyed Peas and Mya and of film importance The twist to an old Searchlight. only story. reminds me of a once fuller soundtrack tunes, rent the schools, No longer are they factors in this Two actors I didn't redeeming recog- Reese Witherspoon. DVD, and shimmy to the for failed business simply the half- nize the lead roles of film are constantly play In the end, the inter-racial salsa in r00m... Film tech- your living students. is more naked the (Romola and eye candy, over- Katey Garai) is not be. pair meant to After Cuban nical than style. simply taking a and the fact Javier Luna). is flowing booze (Diego Katey the Cuban president flees the camera and the hitting that there were more drugs an introverted, intelligent record button. There are than dirt. This is ideally a high school student, and too simply far many tech- brainless indi- comes from a well-to-do fami- film for the niques, stylistics and cine- who ly spending time in Cuba vidual or someone for film cre- matography to from all while her father (John wants get away ation to be reduced to such for Slattery, Mona Lisa Smile) that cramming simplistic terms. For exam- executive with midterms. pursues an job ple. the notion of the inclu- Ford. sion of a plot is essential to Fact Katey is intrigued by the Cheeky film and Club Dread any Did know that the Cuban lifestyle; especially by you on what exemplifies happens for the the locals the final of shooting way "feel night when there is a complete of music." When she recognizes Titanic, a couple lack of Film one. production mixed PCP a Cuban bus boy from the pranksters should not be left in the into the clam hotel (Javier) dancing pre- (angel dust) hands of the simple-minded. chowder served to Bill cariously in the heat of revo- Paxton? It's true! He was lutionary times, she feels an Who should it with? you see hallucina- to in for urge participate his sen- hospitalized Remember break spring tions and remained listless suality. and the Dominican ('untributcjd Photo for two weeks after the inci- In an effort to help hex- Take whoever Republic? you dent! new friend find hope by mov Wow, this scene is incredibly romantic and CERTAINLY not cliche Wednesday March 3,2004 Entertainment 23

Technology: music's shiny new god

struct brilliant sound Do we like today's music because it's 'sounding-' the songwriting genius and quality ancl power that albums based on the incredible influence lent modern can entirely they recording' pro-

same four chords to future generations of rock- duce in the first place. My or because modern power good recording looped in repetition with little ers. advice to new bands is simply

to no songwriting creativity. this: steal everything* you can are out? studios extremely pimped And wow, since the advent from the 60s, couple it with My advice to new of cheaper recording tech- new recording- technology Ever wonder what makes and their and can't lose! Chances Duke of nologies exponen- bands is to steal you new tracks sound so wicked- tially raising scale of' audio are that you'll never touch She full and can New everything you the Recording ly punchy? quality, anyone can throw classics from a song-writ- is how. and technology many down a sick sounding track from the 60s and ing perspective and most of of us are regularly accus- with nothing more than a their guitar licks were stolen it with tomed to hearing* great Mac-housed and couple new from guitar innovator Robert Chris digital rig sound when the in we jam basic know-how. Maybe that's technolo- Johnson the 50's anyway, Collie recording tunes. because of who Just sell Now, this, why so many bands totally so cares. don't

it's obvious to me tech- You can't lose! that suck nowadays, since it only gy. your soul to the Devil like allowed nology has much of costs a label 15 grand to get a Robert apparently did. as A ton of people would dig- the today's music to be enjoyed radio quality disc into the that's likely to be hazardous music of older generations if on a level that has to nothing market. Why not take a The industry's attempt to to your long-term health. only it sounded as rich and do with songwriting quality. chance on garbage? flood the market with re- full as our new stuff, On many occasions I've liked So would people listen to issues and re-masters still notwithstanding* how quick- listening to something* sim- the music of doesn't match the level of rate HMV generations past ly its shelving at ply because the production if it had post-90s sound qual- to be may happen dwindling*. and sound value was high, ity? I'd hazard that they But alas, the industry will thinking, "Who cares if I dig would, and obviously records think of to save its something* the itself?" song executives agree with me, soul, wait and see. just not ••Weekly Lyrics I'm hooked because considering' that atore men- Since around the late 80s, the songwriting was amaz- tioned Timberlake's newest the noticeable quality of *iill ic ing but because the tone shtiek comes from emulating recorded music has skyrock- pounding from head- soul-based that were my jams "When '1 look at '1 eted and many listeners are you squint phones is so strong* and standard fare in the early 80s forever hooked on the level of are that enticing, and its layering so but are now coupled with you veautifuC sound quality that flows intricate and It's huge value via complex. production And is tractor from a post-80s orientated ! my a more of an academic appreci- modern, technology. pussy CD collection. Whether the As For when I listen and ation. an example here, myself, this is a tractor artist is Mike Ness or yuii I've permitted Justin to the 'classic and influential Scarf all sound 'And'l'm illicit, dreams ace, they pris- to be in haunted(nj explicit Timberlake played rockers' such as Jimi my tine thanks to It's technology. : because Hendrix, Led or the 'And wake' between my presence simply Zepplin ] cant so 'J just drift in no secret, but all of these really up his underlying tracks are Doors, it really pisses me off and the faff groups are recording is dialed, from a production how much they are sold short T'kinkincj glass empty their music within ,r mastering* and sound sound I real standpoint awe- by poor quality. and it's not full a hyped-up digital studio thinking quite some. The same can be said ize they had no choice but to environment, stacked with a Do know these Beatli selected them in for a band like MEST who, deal with the 12-track analog- you Carly lyrics? Sing' of and fridge-full processors with assistance the shower Be the first to send email with the the of pro- studios of the time, but it's perhaps? an techno-wizardry producers. and artist to I'll ducer John Fledman, con- just not fair, considering all song name [email protected] and in the next that put your name issue, plus you'll get a free CD the nice record labels haven't been giving to me!

Last week:

the Jason Shim was first to correctly guess that last week's HEAR SAY lyrics were from the title track of Death Cab for Cutie's criti- cally acclaimed album Transatlanticism. Super fantastic!

Fallen Year's independent vide a solid basis for future

release captures a melodic recordings. After all, live - Chris, Entertainment 'Editor intensity often found only in shows have been known to live performance. bring Brampton bands to the Influences from a diverse spotlight. "Every band's past, V. lineup of bands and musical present and future is partial- tastes have led Fallen Year to ly, if not fully, determined by a catchy combination of where they're from," argues W.O.C.H. punk, rock and pop-edged Nimmo. "Brampton shows

emo. Bright vocals and chord are insane and [have been]

the of a few progressions are contrasted birthplace quite (Waterloo Off Campus Housing) with bands a particularly non- doing very well for and Year poppy drum sound themselves.' And Fallen strong rhythm guitar tech- are not about to let that nique. opportunity pass them by. Now Renting! Lyrically, To Breathe Again

deals with from issues per- shows sonal to political, though it "Brampton May and Sept occupancy to do so without the manages are insane and the tired emo cliches or preachy 8-month leases available of a political references. "As a birthplace quite band, write honest we lyrics. few bands doing We're not going to sing- about 747-7276 sleeping with girls on tour very well." because the truth is, we're

ugly and. no one thinks we're attractive." confesses drum- "[When] we're on tour, it's www.rentwoch.com to we're Fallen mer Adam Nimmo. "We write easy say, 'Hi, what's true to us." Year from Toronto.' because Fallen Year has nobody knows where Though Accomodations for over 400 students we'll yet to define a sound that is Brampton is, but always Utilizing the breakdowns and exten- 'We're Fallen Year from unmistakably theirs, say, *Quality summer sublets also available vocal harmonies that sive touring in Canada and Brampton.'"

Brampton audiences have the U.S. in support of To KatLourenco come to know and love, Breathe is sure to S Again pro- r

ti*tß €O ~IP Hop TrtUR - SAT

WK alternative SUVTOW SKOOL

220 King St N Waterloo 725-4287 e-mail: [email protected] 24 Entertainment Wednesday March 3.2004

Opeth metal mayhem RADIO

LEN BALL metal flawlessness performed LAURIER Staff Writer by Sweden's Opeth. A band that has been active for 14

Tuesday February 24 was a to years, Opeth know how Top 5 Charts day and an even better good play, know how to write, and if in night you were Toronto know how to perform. at the Opera House from Launching 1 into classics such Top 5 New Artists about 8 to 12 Three metal pin. as "Blackwater Park" and a all bands, differently styled unique rendition of and hailing- from three differ- "Deliverance," Opeth deliv- ent countries, hit the stage ered their unequivocally The Shins a * for a night of energy and and trademark com- unique Sub Chutes TooNarrow Pop musical splendor, spearhead- bination of airy lyrical ballad ed by headliner Opeth. The with the heart-pound- Stills style 7 n/a 1 ll/Ct House also WillBreak Your Heart VlC® Opera happens to ing\ technically compound Logic be one of the best concert ven- of black and powerful sound Joel Plaskett o / m in n a ues and around the metal. Also their enhancing- Truthfully, Truthfully Maple Music Toronto area, creating a performance were witty little The Maple Music much A o Miniatures more intimate environ- commentary thrown in gems "' ct ment between the audience Coma Kid such as. "Thank you so and the artist also while much, we hope don't The Mood pro- you - n/a 1 room to suffi- think At viding enough we're shit." Golden. What's On theSurface Independant

house a decent-sized ciently one point the crowd was crowd without to chant "Satan is taking away encouraged 5 Punk/Rock Artists visual the Top clarity. my God," band declaring Moon spell were the open- that it was essential to get a the ers for the show, first rec- little more evil for the next Contributed Photo metal ognizably successful track" which was also a nice band to hail from is about touch if that Moneen Small Man Portugal. Opeth currently thinking you appreciate /„ y, n

Their sound is a combination soul. Are We With WhoWe Are Now? Records devouring your immortal kind of thing. Really Happy Right of slower. dark both heavy Opeth synchronized Weakerthans delivered relentless 2 2 rhythms with progressive a pound- the tonal of voiced 5 quality Reconstruction Site Epitaph aria of death metal. Their and ing* traditional guitar keyboard song* and the musical resembles the Brand New melodies and harmonies that style "metal that one screaming" 35c3 of death metal Crown created a mainstay DejaEntendu Triple evidently great might expect with black mixed with version of the opening mood for the begin- a. metal. What makes them so Yeflowcard d n/a 1 somewhat deficient and drea- of the show and set the is how ning interesting success- Ocean Avenue Capitol for the ry sound of nu-metal, but stage next two bands. fully they can incorporate heStrokes much heavier and far 40 minute set more slow with n/a Playing a with ballads classic ~5 1 J Fire Room on their intense. Although their set- songs ranging from black metal. There is the lasted a mere 30 minutes, the earlier release, The Butterfly sense of storytelling' to their the 5 Artists to their intensity of live perform- Hip Effect, newest edition, music and a medieval folk- Top Hop ance compensated simply due Darkness and Hope, like depth to their unusually fast and to tempos blaring- which Moonspell provided a more lengthy songs typical- and guitars. As opposed to laid back disparate tone ly last between six and 13 Devildriver's recorded music, than that of traditional minutes. For those who are West 1 n/a 1 Kayne their live show out- harsher metal. greatly the childlike iRockafeller heavy repulsed by The College Dropout classes the somewhat imita- There was an immediate rhetoric, boring* simplicity RJD2 Definitive of o / - of tive sound their albums and minimalistic n a change pace when tone of * M/Cl 1 Th* Horror J X and threw down U Devildriver hit the Des they stage. Theory of a Nickel-Creed or their best "I Fafara, of Coal arguably track, the White is Brother Ali formerly Stripes, Opeth 3 n/a 1 Could Care Less" with author- Chamber Shadow on the Sun Rhymesayers (albeit sounding one of the more uniquely like his and ity. nothing previous divergent sounds in the What made the less-talented band) and now truly per- realm of music and M/Cl 1 * composi- Personal Journals Records formance memorablewas the frontman for Devildriver, tion. —— - Subterraneous hour and a half of solid black Binary Star 5 n/a 1 ReCOrds Masters of the Universe

1 I -H)t1 1 }f

I ' JJ J)\l i J I yi\ li\lvjl fJ pt * V * -w 'llfp - tjpl pplt# #vpi worlr iji/ilk ii HOTIICiIIII ®wll liw V HHi *Bs «b US 'SSSSww sßv 98 «■ Hps* - «« 3Bll6liil|ipß

" "* . '* ' T >T ' - ' J/' -. jl

' Jm tif-fe. . J ': *»fc> 'St.

< .•::.'; ~ „. .■ \. * S. "it :*. i;».,. ;. ,v ! ' :: asp ? : J&S&&. |j?fP*f- -ff- s 5

C - i ;? P"' # -f fc- ,■■£ ; r : - • k J* : ' ! ; Hlj&Jfc ■ . ||p

Hiring for all positions for Fail 2004 % , I** . . Wr Pow v.

" 4 * *

- ; i H IM jr £? . t*.. *.=Jf ■, § |

' ' 1 »r T» ms , >* """""" '*^^^^,^^^^^^^*P id

Due to the WLUSU Main Office Friday March 1 2th 2004, 1 2:oopm

dl , be . • Classifieds 25 utT)NKSDAYMARCH 2004

* I 4/5 Rooms for Sublet Part-Time Work Leadership Travel Opportunities Group of 5: Co-op 99 International Summer Five house I Regina St. N. Female only, for Paid part-time support worker Children's room apartment in

to summer, 2 bathrooms, free park- positions available in various resi- Villages has adult leadership travel available Sept Dee '04 and May Finland, Brazil, '05 for students. ing/laundry, fully furnished, newly dential settings for individualswith opportunities to to Aug co-op Be ro House Four and India. Candidates Furnished. 10 min renovated, spacious, 5 minute walk developmental challenges. Every Austria Ample parking. Close to WLU to May ay from Albert. from WLU, $300 second weekend and/or relief must be 21 or older and have walk to WLU 120 $90 pach r>lus ntill- + utilities, contact yrs.

interest in education, cul- week. Call 888-0364. A?° 'Wc 880-8776, Laura or Asha. hours. Generally 8 or 12 hour an peace per Don smokers nr lniirl mudir 03, children and fun. No. shifts. Experience an asset. Send ture. < plione . must Bedroom Condo for Rent resume to Don Mader c/o K-W Applications be submitted by e sa £ CISV is May 1/04 to 30/05. Close to Habilitation Services, 108 Sydney Febuary 29/04. a non- ' __ Apr For i- University. Great condition. Street South Kitchener, ON, N2G profit, volunteer organization. (Waterloo) Need or 8 includes 2V2. Minimum 8 month committ- more information call Sandra at aoq qc gas fireplace, A/C, email info@cisvwater- Sinise fridge/stove/dishwasher, full laun- ment. 576-0989 or Gary £495 call Harry, KW Safe Storage I dr deck Call Bob @ 888- loo.org/ You are my hero. especially loved >'- - garage- ftonas* 1361 W Moore Avenue S.S 570-0985, bad didn't 7103 and refer Condo #25. you as Lt. Dan. Too you Waterloo. make it up in Apollo 13...wait a

Flexible Lease Teach English Overseas second? Write back. 112or r nt Rooms GS Fan Club , Two rooms in renovated house with Jobsss Guaranteed - Great Pay. tor rent in nouse on rooms , , Two _ ,. r. r Certified on-line • character. Friendly, warm, and TESOL or by cor- o ct Mav . Mav lease Sunview Wanted Iron Baker • peaceful atmosphere. Much nicer respondence. FREE Infopack: 1- Roommate Susie-Q, Parkincr laundrva two plus uuiiues. rarKing, y than the student house. 888-270-2941 Roommate wanted for 1, Let the begin. Name a average orglobaltesol.com May competition bathrooms and g . $360/month. [email protected] 2004. One spacious bedroom in time and a place, we'll supply the Jack or Meianie at 00 bedroom in cookie sheets, bring the flour, . Qr 579.3621. two apartment you

" ~ facili- soda, vanilla, chocolate Richmond squares. Laundry baking Rooms for Sub e 2/3 and butter, milk, and Summer Sublet CAMP WAYNE FOR GIRLS ties, pool, squash court, gym, chips, eggs, Excellent suDiets avaia e in Children's billiards all in $475 inclu- Crank the convection one big room (bachelor) fully fur- sleep-away camp. building. sausage. up or o J oea quiet/clean Duiiaing - Call Robin 888-6759. it's time to baking. nished big balcony, 2 minute Northeast Pennsylvania (6/18 sive. oven, get room unit® rented at $550/month f If love children and Iron Chefs: J-rock and C-dawg tQ WLU ( 3? Unlversity Ave 8/15/04). you inclusive Needed West) Rent: $300 (negotiable) All want a caring, fun environment we Roommate

and need a fifth. Great facilities included + cable. Contact need female staff as directors Four people Celine, wnr hat 747 797fi W.U.i.h. ar for: multi 5 bedroom unit on Your heart will on and col- Narges (519)722-8945. instructors tennis, golf, gym- level, go your ~ ~ not T~ I nasties, waterskiing, Spruce St. Clean, laundry, park- lar bone will stab me if you . swimming, Rentals May and September hard. team licensed, 12 month lease don't hit chest so BRIDGEPORT LOFTS sailing,B sports, cheerleading, ing, your in.both May and Call 747-0567 or Rentes.available st Waterloo . ropes camping/nature, drama. beginning May 1. Bndgeport/Reglna , lll Dave Jennifer's Father, 5.„„ finest student accomo- video, ceramics, sculpture, batik, at 747-4481. , the region's and 8q month leases. Hrai „inrt fromfrnm Housing Jenn's Dad, word _ slikscre en. Happy Birthday datiQns Many May j leases avail guitar, jeweleiy, piano, aerobics, martial Female Roommate Wanted on the street is that you make a rail' able for 4 months, 8 months or one photography, i ~c fw March 20. At 4-262 St. Great location, mean marshmallow icing for one tw (No September leases). arts. Interviews Regina nr h 797fi year. atW.U.I.H. /4 /- /z /b. with New 2 heck of cake. Good work. dad Contact the Property Manager at Apply on-line at www.campwayne- Share 3 girls. building, a My call 1-516-889-3217. full bathrooms, parking, can't even locate the kettle. Can 747-5294: go to our website at girls.com or laundry, 5 Bedrooms Available•i email cable/phone jacks. lease. Call you make me some marshy icing www.pdhco.ca or bridgeport- May 5 bed across from WLU Spacious too oh and chocolate for further Mary-Ellen 746-3731. please, fudge, lofts@rogers com of 2 3 welcome. campus. Group oi Cord Friend Dishwashers, 2 full baths, fridges,

— — — microwave and A/C, phone/inter- ■ — ■n, r II avail- CDCC net/cable, newer building, J}-?-.. able May ■/2004.496.263b. fife* gIaSSeS Ot COHtaCtS... BUY ONE Get Dressmakers, Jr __ Bessie's . ~ 6 Bedroom House OetailS fH Store. Alterations for women and men. 22 AXIC CDCCI Close to campus, large room, pn- street South Waterloo ~, UNt rKfcfc! & back no ° yard, parking, pets, , - vate _ ___ , TT between OW. Sports and Home included, OR CONTACTS all outside maintainence EYEGLASSES — to * " Hardware. Open Monday Friday, |« W- '. I§P« roil/iQ«Call 496-2630. . 9:00 to 5:30, Sat to 2:00. 519-747-

3565. Summer Sublet ..

At least bedrooms available at 3/5 006 Of ByeglaSSßS oat, DAT, PCAT, Soap j Buy COmplCtC P3ir e ™rnegotiaMe Carving Or SO ft COlltaCt ICHSCS ,3t regular

Utilities included. 15 minute walk slmtaLs" PHCC, 3nd get 3 SeCOP.d P.W FREE. on Free & & J to WLU. Close to Zehrs. laun- , . , r weekends. Study packages for and free rfrv central anair and tiee tenniste ,, MCAT, DAT, OAT, PCAT. Complete , court use. Sublet starts May 2004. ' , ,, I H 4f 111Lvil H ; a i jftl iWtTi sets of notes and tests with j , , j i « i o -i -ui practice At least 2 bedrooms available tor detailed , detailed answer kevs. For HHBmHnKHniR onn /s~\ r , 2004/05 school year. Contact informationabout each test, dates, ** . /iiooo'i /% n ll6 HOUF SCFVICe 00 fflOSt locations, cost, shipping charges. : Q t ° Slid Coflt3Cf SOHSOS« refund policy and detailed inlorma- §i3SS€S

tion about study packages please m , 150 Ave. W, ~ \lsit or call University ~ , www.prepseminars.com Neai university, excellent conch- toll free at i-866-408-1572Ask for \ QmpUS Court. Plaza, Owned by professor, 6 bed- (corner of Philip and University) 2 room, living room, 2 kitchens, jMg

bathrooms, washer dryer. 1 for May w uvi tnn* Sew What. Expires: March 31, 2CX54 at one year. One house $2370 (405 shortened buttons d Jeans Tamarack) and other at $2460/ Ne^ replaced, or a patch put on your month (335 Albert) plus utilities. favourite pants? Call and make an 748 7Q9S

s =«rd,r™ Discuss y° ur °p tions

with Faculty of

Cafe'and Education representatives Lounee P]liVfVPl9lnf|Pl

Qakville recruiting for the biggest ■ 3 311 I I 1111 ■ 2 Rooms in Apartment ■IJII - [ ■if J from : If fresh summer ever! you are hip, Looking for two non-smoking

share females to an apartment all Cook Hoiiy street $3so+ James University osl«ons ask for P 9M utilities. Call 886-8527, | [email protected] I 1 I ■ lIJ ■ I Catherine. M| Vjlfl JJ MOfiaSh UlllVerSlty

" Melbourne

with R.yM . ..-■ on y<>w degree one ■ m tmveiSity ( Newcastle ■I If of these dynamic, practical, ￿ u e fica'e %M I m °!§ f' One day only! ||||3F environmental programs to

enhance qualifications your Learn about entry market Wm $■ # in today's job application finvironmental Management & ,' 112 Assessment Australian & Ecosystem Restoration | Geographic Information Systems 5 Ontario teacher

These two-semester (eight-month) 2, programs start in September. ty Study at the beautiful Glendale Campus! «g. W'IfRSKK

State-of-the-art laboratories complement $«rvi£.e,s our 68-acre on-site Living Laboratory. fi)

\ntnfR\ inioiofozireKK.commm training the centre for environmental q ?(====M£\ Niagara college 3 www.oztrekk.com e-mail: U \%=Z=y) 905-641-2252 ext. 4470 or [email protected] jnili^^Rljllffiffrulaj

I Niagara College Canada 26 Arts Wednesday March 3.2004

Reviews from the Fringe!

The plays of Laurier's annual theatre festival are critiqued by Cord staff

Based on the Greek myth for which it is named, the of this "Prometheus Next" was a Easily longest play well-written the 35-minute story, the execu- year's Fringe, tion of which "Pink didn't work long Lighter" is essen- well it nearly as as should tially a PG-13 episode of have. While the story was Dawson's Creek. The predictable for anybody grandiose language, pseudo- ?amiliar with the tale of philosophical rambling-s, Prometheus, the moderniza- soundtrack and tion of the myth worked well pop-punk This for the is what life's really like' most part. all Unfortunately, the acting- guise served to make this not like was up to par and I was play appear an episode of left often unconvinced that the popular teen drama. the action on stage was as be Wilbur What may surprising*, McLean suspenseful and traumatiz- however, is that "Pink "The and of Pink directed Chris Clemens ing- to the characters as the Actors perform Glory, Sorrow Significance a Lighter", by and Lighter" is extremely well events portrayed likely Meegan Scanlon... this play paralleled The Lord of the Rings in its success, sweeping the Fringe Oscars. done and is comparable in would be. This was a good to that could have been quality an episode of play a audience, was left wondering* entirely separate works. Dawson's Creek. The great one. imple- what it was I had just wit- -J.A. mentation of a pink lighter nessed. -W.M, -Wilbur McLean as the central piece to the multi-faceted story works well to draw together what would otherwise be dis- very The five-act monologues sur- jointed individualparts. This rounding representations of

play was quite an achieve- life at Laurier had both their

ment and I can appreciate its good and bad moments.

quality even though I hate Shirley Manh stood out by Four entirely different char- its My favourite play of Dawson's Creek. far with hilar- a fantastically acters Based on the Shakespearean come together for one block, "The was an -W.M. role in King-" of ious Christopher idea the world being a night in Thompson's play excellently acted, hilarious Wild". the Durang's "Laughing stage and all men and making for a unique script adventure of an incompetent Manh played a woman com- women being players, but not an entirely monarch who faces unique an over- plaining about waiting Mason's play was well plot. throw two attempt by sepa- behind someone to tuna out and written. In grab the thought Although play may rate The comedic tim- parties. fish at the store. She this the two leads grocery have lacked it case are creativity, was of the ing- writing was top showed so much emotion and actors in a play who realize entertaining' with both seri- notch and the subtlety of liveliness that I could have that their world is a stage ous and humourous some of the humour was I know that somewhere in watched her perform all controlled by the writer. moments. The this is extremely professional. play something* pro- night. Heidi Taves was hilarious The highlight was the only "The found. when thing holding- Unfortunately, Andrew Mundy's mono- as naive Rosemary dancing casting- of Katie West and back is its that King" length. profoundness is lost on called "Lack of around like a marionette and logue Tudor Costache as the bitter While it's than shorter some the audience, it is the ere- Communication" from HBO's playiny; hopscotch while journalist and hippy idealist * of the other the • : wl be OZ also done. plays, lay ■Y:.- ---- was well DV respectively. There was a sometimes not A sequences faulted, the audience. Muiidy made an impact as lie Alexandre Apollini. spouted great c hemistry between the on; the four act abstract I dragged shortening opera, into our vast- off more put perspective profound thoughts. two as tiiey played off each five minutes can't even fathom what this and performance by array of communication The only drawback was other's lines well and inter- could have worked wonders. was about how the performance much world is preoc- that the play ran long as the acted naturally. Overall, "The however, King" I it was a with enter- though suspect of cupied being concept the script wore Overall, Thompson's play is how an example of just at tained than else. post-modern attempt per- thin. anything was intriguing but I felt lost skilled a student perform- formance art gone awry. I'm The downfall however was Jennifer Assetin by the end and as though I be. ance can sure that somewhere a street that the five pieces didn't had missed the point. artist is smiling- gleefully but mesh well and together -J.A. -W.M. I. like others in the many might have been better off as

&?***< \A/ish could live 1 you

JJ Minutes from WLU Flexible move in/out -

* S " Dem ocratically controlled On-site pub (Weavers' Arms) -

BSBSSm \ North/South A . '/FRINGES': xJT"" <§> 268 Phillip St. 519.883.3670 riPoefry/ rn M H mm 3 *T\ Phniipst. 1 m Acck > www.wcri.org ..

" Shameless such these resulted in full W advertising ploys as posters 112"" crowds at both Friday and Saturday night performances. |Vs j-ASJu g^g/V^A-i_r Arts 27 wn)NESDAY MARCH 3,2004

Give me something good to read

"Crime and Punishment" deals with "The Da Vinci Code" is brilliantly crafted to the last page;

author from life guilt and redemption... Dan Brown pulls you away everyday

STEPHANIE BUTCHER children, which happens to one being' a cryptographer a drunken THOMAS THOMPSON semi-employed Cord Arts be the basis behind the entire and the other a professor at a Special Projects Editor clerk who Raskolnikov book. Not surprisingly, due university specializing in encounters early in the book, of Siou? Dei? to of Priory Opus my personal opinion Symbology... together they cold winter in his It was a day has spent all family's Church scandals? Insiders Jesus and what I'd been have to break the code that when I began peruse in the tavern Calgary money drinking assassins? Double-cross- this will lead them to the "buried and brought up to believe, the mock-leather and has forced his through daughter I treasure' that will the ing- friends? Cryptographers was one of the reasons why change to bound copy of Dostoevsky's Sofya enter into prostitu- and Symbologists? What the did not at first want to read world if it gets into the ana Punishment. I had tion in order to their Crime support hands. heck is going on here? It's the b00k... I'd heard about wrong book for its up the aes- family. picked not the end of the world... is this sub-plot throughout the The most interesting thetic value rather than its Crime and Punishment is to I found about this book it? novel and found it be unap- thing merits; it looked nice divided into six and an literary parts friend of in is not the differ- Being told by a pealing to me. However, only many shelf. But when I on my epilogue. Much of the narra- mine that I, as a English and the interest of giving heart to ent symbols present, but also the first I tion of the novel is set in the opened up page of of Religion major, should most the phrase "Don't judge a the mention many the was surprised by quality consciousness of definitely read this book, I book by its cover," I put aside Leonardo Da Vinci's works. of the work. Raskolnikov rather than in bought The Da Vinci Code at personal opinion and almost Da Vinci, said to have been a Set in Saint Petersburg the actual streets of St. member the Laurier bookstore... it reluctantly picked up the of the Priory of Sion late nineteenth during the Petersburg. The reader expe- had at book. tried to the truth across was the only copy they get century the reader enters riences his thoughts and that time. Originally intend- through bis paintings. into the dark world of Rodian reactions his actual over The of all ing- to take it with me to read In the interest of most important Romanovich Raskolnikov. A actions throughout the book. 011 the plane to Florida the his pieces is the painting he law student While the characters handsome young heart to the following week, 1 couldn't giving did about The Last Supper. who has sunk into extreme themselves come off as mor- contain my curiosity and This has been a painting that Raskolnikov cut "don't debt, has bid, it must be remembered # to phrase cracked open the cover supposedly proved that Jesus himself off from the world that Dostoevsky was writing reveal the most amazing judge a book by its had twelve Male disciples, but and tries to avoid about a hard time in everyone very Da story I've ever experienced. it is said that Vinci's around him. Raskolnikov. Russian history. The strong cover," I reluctantly And I mean, experienced. painting was painted over living in the attic of a house, point about this novel is that The of Brown's book and recent beauty picked up the slightly, only out to off his it the reader to slips pawn compels place restorative work on the books is that he pulls you his watch, an heirloom from guilt, consciousness and into the story from the first, painting has emerged the dead father, to Alyona into context to redemption to truth... there was heart-stopping sentence I was not as disappointed a woman Ivanovna an old the novel. money fully appreciate Last the last, brilliantly crafted as I had expected. Far, far present at the Supper. lender. In the back of his the that Despite gloom Brown I either... page. is captivating. from my disappointment. Not just any woman mind he plots her murder, a exists in much of the novel You not only lose track of discovered something- totally Mary Magdalene was not for his to be revenge poverty per- there appears redemp- time, but everything else you unexpected... Dan Brown cer- only present at the Last and later in the first tion for the troubled haps, lot of encounter in your daily rou- tainly put one heck of a of Supper Christ, but she was book of the novel he carries Raskolnikov. He confesses tine... roommates, favourite research into making this one of the apostles of Jesus. out this act his crime to God, the commu- killing Alyona idea television shows, music play- book! And even though it A more-than-interesting and her sister. Raskolnikov nity and the police. ing- in the background, the contradicted personal beliefs that perhaps the 'biblical steals their but out of him money Sofya accompanies it have pot burning on the stove... of mine, that's always some- prostitute' we seen so hides it rather than and when she falls ill he guilt truly who all disappears as you delve thing to admire in a writer. much of was healed spends it. realizes how much that he further and further into the The main conflict in this from prostitution by her love Throughout the novel. loves her. It is plot. book therefore, is the fact of Jesus, was really not what Raskolnikov continues to slip another story, as described in Aside from being a "liber- that both Opus Dei and the she seemed. into as the words of deeper insanity guilt Dostoevsky. to Brown is than al Catholic," (that is say Priory of Si on are seeking Dan more a consumes him. There seems "But that is the of beginning the that although I don't agree the same information... brilliant mastermind; he is the to be a theme of the new the story of persistent story, to incredible author. If one hundred per cent with Priory out promote and also an all of the renewal of a of suffering amongst gradual man, 5 there out exactly everything the make this 'scandalous infor- is anyone there characters that Raskolnikov his of gradual regeneration, I Church says or does, am a mation public and Opus Dei, looking for a good read, they encounters. His mother and his slow from one progress this firm believer in Jesus, Mary working on behalf of the should definitely pick up his sister are as consumed world to another, of how he most out b00k... the mother of God, and Vatican, to stop it from it's way more than about his destitution as he is. learned to know a hitherto of church doctrine). I have to becoming public knowledge... worth the read! His sister is about to enter undreamedof reality." that I it say particularly even if includes killing peo- into an arranged marriage to enjoyed The Da Vinci Code. ple to get what they want. the fortunes of their change in much Even the somewhat absurd Caught up this family. Semyon Marmeladov, Conspiracy Theory that larger web of deceit, lies, dou- Jesus and Mary Magdalene ble-crossings and assassina-

were married and had two tion attempts are two people, The poverty of

M}f TIONS I „ wealth Presents: corporate E%!S~

leave the stuff of corpora- all the tions bleeding over

screen. Perhaps the most intrigu- ing- and innovative idea of the documentary is its first IM'' segment comparison of the ,#»#/« t

corporation to a person: both KATIE WEST can buy and sell, both can U(3> both Arts Editor sue and be sued, are Jin ® ■»■ ®sr members of society, and ulti- (■i The is docu- is Corporation a mately the corporation a... that takes star- This YlN^G^a mentary a psychopath?! uncov- UNIVER S I T tling look at the money-mak- ered diagnosis of corporate ing institutions that hold character is traced through

power and control over our the documentary with a

lives; more know checklist the than we employing HH and more than they deserve. DSM IV, the standard assess- iv I/ 125 King St. West Televised in three parts, the ment tool of psychiatrists W/l/A | Ilit Downtown Kitchener I examination of the "modem and psychologists. Jm business corporation" is bro- Past the analysis of its INFO: 519.743-5657 I ken the film finish- up into The Pathology of "personality," if 9

Commerce, Planet Inc., and es as Reckoning looks back at

Reckoning. the affiliation between corpo- The and love first program has rations we know the rise already aired, the second today that supported BUSSING - FREE ALL NIGHT part airs March 3rd, and the of Nazi Germany. Startling beginning@6:3opm third fact on March 10th, both at fact after startling cre- I - NO LINE UP FOR ALL. 10 of unsettle- pm on TVO. Each seg- ate a stirring NO COVER and V.I.P treatment for ALL ment of stomachs - LADIES, addresses questions nient in the pits that cause squirming and everwhere. The viewer WATER BUFFALOES and other V.I.P'S door dark slamming, and would begins to realize the these - of with the of drink! pe undeniably easier to degree of bruising on FREE lb. wings purchase any ignore. corporate bad apples, I - HIP HOP/HOT HITS The Wax But, @ . with a stacked list of la a documentary that is interviewees and including insightful provocative, - LIVE MUSIC in The Still Bar & Grill «oam Chomksky. Naomi makers Mark Achbar, -OPEN MIC 7-10 SMMffl em and Michael Moore, Jennifer Abbott and Joel , along with CEO's have created a film of compa- Bakan -LIVE BAND IG-CLOSE s RB| ij® deluding Goodyear and that the Glove and Mail call aell, no for one is slinking "the next Bowling WLU bus pick ups: Comer of Hazel & University, corner of King & Marshall. away or documen- getting off easy, Columbine." The U of W bus & Grill Plaza) issues of the pick up: University Phillip (Mongolian the corporation tary is also hitting * March 12- Paradox of "great Princess Cinemas mic slot Door-2-Door * d afford to To book V.I.P, or an hidden liarin" 30th. You can your open bussing

attacked at the out. heart and check this call: DANIEL @ 519 575 0095 28 Arts Wednesday March 3.2004

Re: writing and history here

Speakers were well-received at Laurier on Friday as they

gathered to discuss traditional historical texts and what to do with the question and impossibility of objectivity

THOMAS THOMPSON not destiny. The need for a structed into facts. Opera is Editor Special Projects personal history and a sense an example of how history

of community was identified has been borrowed and used.

A to or challenge history- as some of the necessary Hutcheon discussed how how rather a challenge on steps towards self healing. Opera displayed history and

is seems to After the direction has used to history perceived lunch, history serve a have been the overriding of the colloquium shifted; political agenda. She theme of "Re-Writing The "Based On A True Story:" described that Opera houses of Past," a joint colloquium History, Appropriation and were centers of political WLU activism and speakers organized by Adaptation presented by resistance, par- and the University of Guelph. Linda Hutcheon from the ticularly in Italy during the The ideas in the presented University of Toronto cen- rule of the Austro-Hungarian event day-long were very tered on the place Opera had Empire. The expropriation of and I was forced in Hutcheon, author used to interesting, history. history was create a wonder to if four years of of several books, has two on common identity that led to

slaving over mouldy texts in Opera; Opera: Desire, Disease nationalism. the is the best library way to and Death and Bodily Charm: Following the second approach history. Living- Opera. panel was a reading by Jane The speakers discussed Urquhart. As the hour struck

how much of the more tradi- four, the half "The history I deal once empty tional historical texts and room began to overflow and narratives with the with does not only deal deal people milled about the back experience of those who are waiting for chairs and with the truth," par- in It has been the role in power. taking some of the of literature that has enabled said desserts Urquhart in that were available

the voice of the minorities on the back table.

and without her opening those power to "The history I deal with be heard in history. In gener- remarks... does not deal with the truth," talked about al. the speakers Urquhart said in her opening how poetry, novels and oral remarks. The reading that traditions First of Hutcheon dis- she can give insight all, was going to give was into the historical cussed how the of from her novel experi- objectivity away which ences, historical accounts has been deals with the history of her Joanne Saul, the first- questioned in the last couple own family, yet it wasn't fact speaker discussed Dioime of decades. The "-isms", so to but a narrative of feelings Brand's historical vision. speak, such as feminism, and experiences through Much of this discussion Marxism, and Post- three generations of that

focused on the African Modernism. Hutcheon dis- I think family. everyone in Contributed Photo Diaspora associated with cussed that the problem with the audience was left with a Saul to and"The described that is that in the broader of Urquhart showed up read from her books "Away" slavery. history past, understanding Brand felt that was Stonecarvers" time. history narratives have been con- both history and literature. followed by a stimulating question and answer

A fairytale success for WLU opera

JOHN MEDDICK Le Petit Poucet discovers his Cord Arts friend Chaperon Rouge where they face such tribula- The about funny tiling Opera tions as getting lost in the is that you never know just woods and facing monstrous what to I expect. Well, guess ogres. you can expect singing- and The other major story is often than not more a foreign one of Le Prince Charmant language. but the rest can (Prince Charming), and La often take you by surprise. Princesse (The Princess). to I (Needless say, was also This is a love story between pleasantly surprised by the the two; however, it provides concession table of stimulat- an unexpected twist. A spell ing- refreshments). has been placed on La

Believe it or not, over this Princesse where she falls into

weekend I attended La past a deep sleep and only a "kiss Foret Bleue. which was pre- of love" can awaken her. With sented by WLU Faculty of the help of Le Petit Poucet Music Opei'a Program, along and Le Petit Chaperon Rouge, with the WLU Symphony Le Prince Charmant makes

Orchestra. The Theatre to his way through the forest Auditorium was transformed La Princesse's Castle in order into a breathtaking stage to rescue the princess.

over the weekend as students As for the ending I will

of Laurier on an put excellent not say. Despite my rather show. La Foret Bleue, a pro- annoying penchant for spoil- duction French 111 by composer ing storylines leave you Louis Aubert, interweaves for on your own this one. familiar stories into a com- As I mentioned earlier, the plex plot. Opera was done entirely hi (Before I continue. I must French, which could have make it clear that follow- the potentially made it difficult is ing only my interpretation to understand. Luckily for of this work of Aubert's. I me the program provided a have done the best I can in synopsis of the storyline that order to translate some of I could follow. I was much these into names English, appreciative of the show's however I still for apologize description, as I needed to inaccuracies any on my part. refer to it frequently in order I'll out in the to understand just get open just what was that is now my French very happening as well as to piece poor.) together characters and plot- One of the stories within lines.

La Foret Bleue is of Le Petit I must admit this was

Poucet and Le Petit indeed Chaperon an entertaining per- which Rouge, translated into formance put 011 by Laurier's Tom English is Thumb and Faculty of Music Opera Little Red Hood Riding (for Program as well as the

those of you who also discon- Symphony Orchestra. tinued French class after Assembled with remarkable

grade nine). Le Petit Poucet talent in both vocals and of is one children in a instrumentals, it many was a per- large poor family for which formance that did not disap- the father is unable to If find pro- point. you ever your- vide. Similar to the fairy tale self in need of theatre, the of Hansel the and Gretel, par- Opera is definitely something ents decide to abandon the to think about. You never children in the forest in order know just what to expect. to escape the burden of many Matt Benassi mouths to feed. Separated from the rest of his siblings, Boy is she singing... actually no, she's just posing for the shot and is not even onstage yet.