CAT-TALES GGO RRIN NNO SSHO CAT-TALES GGO RRIN NNO SSHO By Chris Dee Edited by David L. COPYRIGHT © 2004 BY CHRIS DEE ALL RIGHTS RESERVED. BATMAN, CATWOMAN, GOTHAM CITY, ET AL CREATED BY BOB KANE, PROPERTY OF DC ENTERTAINMENT, USED WITHOUT PERMISSION GO RIN NO SHO A BOOK OF FIVE RINGS: INTRODUCTION From my youth, my heart has been inclined towards the Way of Strategy. I went from province to province, dueling with strategists of various schools, and not once did I fail to win, even though I had as many as sixty encounters. I am a warrior of Harima province. I have been many years training in the Way of Strategy, and now I think I will explain it in writing for the first time. —Miyamoto Musashi, Go Rin No Sho It’s not that I distrust Selina. It’s more than a year since I realized how completely I do trust her. There was a cat- crime. A frame-up. Talia throwing a tantrum. But long before I learned who was behind it, I knew—absolutely knew—that Catwoman was not. I never made a decision to trust her. It simply happened. So many years, so many encounters, so much shared time… We fought each other, sometimes passionately, sometimes more… I don’t know… ‘playfully’ she would say. But I am not playful. But we fought each other. And at times, we fought together. Shared time. Something grows between you. Whether good or bad, shared time creates an understanding. You come to know the essence of a person. The essence of Joker is madness. The essence of Superman is decency. The essence of Ra’s al Ghul is pride. The essence of Catwoman is… impossible to put into a word. But it is warm and alive and it draws something rich and joyful from the act of living. There is nothing there to doubt, nothing to suspect, and nothing to question. I don’t distrust her. Catwoman was a criminal and an adversary, but I do not distrust her. The dilemma is the woman, not the cat. The first time Bruce Wayne was invited to the Knickerbocker Cotillion, Charles Ashton said he hoped I wouldn’t bring some callgirl from that Mayflower Madame escort service, because it made Old Gotham Society into a tasteless joke. This year, Gladys Ashton-Larraby said she hoped Selina wouldn’t wear those Manolo Blahnik shoes with a Judith Lieber bag, because that’s all Hermoine would write about and the other ladies’ outfits wouldn’t get a mention. So Catwoman really isn’t the problem this time—unless you figure in that the evening bag is in the shape of a sleeping cat. I don’t claim to be an expert on society columnists or women’s fashions… That’s really not the point anyway. Whether Selina’s celebrity from Cat Tales makes it more or less likely that a newspaper would write about her is NOT the point. The point is that it’s a given that she’ll be attending the party because Bruce Wayne is. The Cat-Tales point is that her outfit is what Gladys is worrying about, not what vulgar bimbo Wayne might foist on them this time. The point is… The point is I’ve lost control. With Selina at my side, Bruce Wayne is not perceived as a womanizing playboy. I have to regain control of how they see me. 2 Go Rin No Sho THE BOOK OF GROUND It is difficult to realize the true Way through sword-fencing alone. Know the smallest things and the biggest things, the shallowest things and the deepest things. As if it were a straight road mapped out on the ground… Selina glanced over the image on the computer screen, then looked up at Bruce. “There are times you are downright strange.” His eyes narrowed critically. She had asked to see the fake Dear John letter that Harley Quinn sent in her effort to break them up. And he showed her. “Harley wrote it, and it’s supposed to be from you. How am I strange?” “Harley sent it. But you… scanned it. You made a special file to keep it in. That’s just weird.” “I didn’t make a file; I had a file. I had to make one when I wrote the original for Jervis to send to Oswald, supposedly to be from Lark. I had to invent a new category. Before this—” “This is you arguing that you’re not downright strange?” “Kitten, there is a way of looking at this where it’s all your fault, you know. Before you came along, rogue correspondence was evidence. Dear Johns were for battling trumped up paternity suits. End of discussion. Rogue correspondence, sub-cat Fake Dear John letters NEVER would have come into my life before you.” “I tell you what,” Selina smiled sweetly, “just as soon as you get to the part you think contradicts the premise that you’re strange, you send up a flare.” Bruce felt a tug at the corner of his lip, but suppressed it. How she loved teasing him. “At least there’s a second document in that folder now,” he grimaced without a twitch. “I hate folders with only one piece of paper in them… makes me think I went and misfiled something… waste of hard disk sectors…” Selina stared. Then she turned her head slightly, a kitten puzzled by a telephone. “You’re putting me on,” she said at last. “Impossible.” Twitch. “I don’t have a sense of humor.” She laughed. She had a wonderful laugh. And like any cat, once he took the initiative and started playing with her, she hopped into his lap and began redefining the game. “Well, now that we’re over courtesy of the tassel twit’s machinations,” she purred, “ever get together with an ex and do it for old times sake?” “Actually, no. Can’t say that I have.” “Good.” Bruce had intended to wait until he had a complete strategy mapped out before informing her of the Fop Initiative. But she was in such a good mood now. It was folly not to take advantage of the opportunity. “Why, Miss Kyle, are you trying to seduce me?” “Who, me?” The wide-eyed innocent bit. What an impossible woman. “Yes you,” he grunted before the kiss. 3 Cat-Tales “Who’s seducing who?” she gasped when they came up for air. He switched off the computer screen with a twitchsmile. “Not in front of the data?” she asked, giggly. Perfect. She was in such a good mood. This would be much easier than expected. OraCom: Channel 1—Nightwing :: Wing? :: :: Hey, Gorgeous.:: :: I love you very much. :: :: Uh oh. :: :: No, no, no. Schmuck. :: :: Whew, that’s better. You had me scared there, O. What happened? :: :: I can’t just say ‘I love you’ and mean it? :: :: Oh man, somebody’s in it deep. And if it’s not me… :: :: There he goes, son of great detective, on the case… :: :: …If it’s not me, it must be B. What’s he done now? :: There was an audible sigh into the microphone, then a slurping sound. :: I’m not quite sure. But something went down, he’s checking in every five minutes. :: :: Checking in? Frequently? On a standard patrol? :: :: Yeah! Totally bizarre, right? And there’s these weird pauses, like he’s waiting for something. :: :: Chitchat. :: :: Huh? :: :: He wants chitchat. He thinks you know something. It’s an opening for you to relax and make small talk so he can find out. :: :: ‘Wingy, my love, ninety seconds of silence followed by a grumbly ‘Batman out’ is not making small talk. :: :: It is with him. Would have thought you knew that by now. So what do you figure happened? :: :: No idea. Anyway, have you seen the Gotham Post yet? :: :: Yep! ‘Nightwing’s Flavor of the Month.’ I’ve been seen ‘swinging around with Tarantula.’ Go me! :: :: You are now single. :: :: Ha, ha. Look, it’s pretty slow out here tonight. What say I make one more pass for our silver Honda and call it a night? :: :: Stop for some mint chocolate chip? :: :: You got it, Beautiful. Nightwing out. :: OraCom: Channel 2—Batman :: Batman? :: :: Here, ‘Wing. :: :: She hasn’t heard a thing. :: :: Damn. :: :: … :: :: … :: 4 Go Rin No Sho :: I haven’t either, Bruce. :: :: … :: :: … :: :: Batman out. :: From his position atop of the Wayne Tower, Batman could look east towards the Phase II construction of those Cromwell condos, halted until a more favorable economy sold off the last units of Phase I. He could look west to the Moxton Building. Old Man Moxton delaying the announcement of the Harriman merger until Luthor’s reelection saber-rattling put defense stocks front and center. And if he jumped to that gargoyle, snagging the pole with the MoMA banner for momentum and swung north, he would see fraternity kids from Hudson University laying traffic cones to force the left lane of car coming off the Beacon Avenue Bridge into their canning gauntlet. It was all strategy. Some of it sound… and some what you’d expect from witless college kids that think they’re clever. But it was still strategy. It was an attempt to foresee the entire journey before setting out, and planning ahead for what was expected down the path. Just as the Book of Ground instructed. The Book of Ground, first section of Go Rin No Sho, the Book of Five Rings, by the greatest samurai sword-fighter Miyamoto Musashi. Musashi was a samurai who codified what it meant to be a warrior.