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lr .:: v ~!Us~m R:~.. ~~.i""'/ i. "~.,., ~-,•- ,., .. l.ol J J the paper .. Page 2 October 30, 2000 the paper. 1 0.30.2000.-Volume 1, Issue 3 General Information ered encouraged, especially if geese, disturbing trend in your life that stems Generat tnfomlatron as •All Mighty Lord of the cartoonists fixated with geese, and a from insufficient suckling as a child. the paper Is su~ to be ltle Universe~~ ah4 display a submis· Have it, 2000. taxidermist are involved. Feels real but Upon further review of your records, student publiCfltiondot tfie ·Harper sl\le tone •1M! is appropriate for you don't have to feed it. we regretfully decline the offering of Colleg$ campus ·community, but is speekirlQ to the future itlfer:~ of your All rights reserved, including the right your services, and ask you to cease tnstead a secre~ " .. mes- feedback wilt to remain silent, that means you Mark. Tom writing immediately. All letters received sage coordinating tt)e· ·· ·on ot The right to an attorney, you'll see why Any references of minorities, maJOri from this day forward will be returned, qur so(ar ~net in a few pages. Also, the right not to ties, milkable barnyard animals, toast at your expense, to your Bellevue •zotg; ten " know any more rights, they never get ers, containers of fruit, Brittany Spears address. And we, the future rulers of further than this in the movies. The (Mike), short balding men whose your world, would like to point out that thlfd .. S!ll'ldiY right to scrape the funk off of your names start with the letter V (Mark), your bed wetting problem is just a er pem)(ttlng, is ··~ teeth, or in Mark's case, off of Mini forest creatures, crunchy snacks that symptom of a larger problem. We uted tree to all stUdel'l~~ taeulty, Wheat's. And finally, th& right to sail stain your fingertips orange, the weak could go into details, but we find no and admintWatiott, ·Gxcept •. Or. Jeeps in Harper lakes-also known as er verbs, The Harbinger (AC), or club need to embarrass you before your Bteuder, Who will not be allowed to sewage retention ponds. chick (nice abs Dan) were done with peers. Maybe in the future if you have his own C()J)Y 4.1!1llf he proves .MirettltJing .. the expressed written consent of Tom embraced the creativity of our messen he can play well Mb <)!tie$. PToducts add. $9Nlces advertiseQ Business Updat~ in Dubuque, Iowa. gers, saw their efforts as a benefit to 16 the paper•are not netfisarity Good news: We got the accounting I all, instead of the harbingers of doom, ...... Ponoy ~ ruhilrs of Zorg, software. Bad news: Business comput Weak and Spineless One we might think about keeping you on the paper tltlJe$$ incapaci>- ers still don't work. So we're still no The rulers of Zorg would like to thank as a Vock-herder. They may smell like emails to tfiEr'ildit unes iosures closer to actualization than Mark is to all those that have expressed interest hells bowels, but they have a loving meet•<*tall'l crlt the normality. But we like our staff mem in working for the Mure establishment, disposition that stems from a need to 1. AIImust bers a little left of center; it keeps us especially you 'Weak and Spineless be rubbed. You might just have some qn prQPef frisky on the phone, especially with the One." Your exhaustive letter campaign thing in common. mat. Books 0 help desk. They just love that. to distinguish yourself from the multi tude of others you call "inferior and The Skinny ~for 'Miv- Burnt Toast [email protected] b Rana ()i(A'j . .. ONE rtiOiti S\bfl.~, ~e~ IT~ 11Y'I!: ~ 0f'C>. ' 5fE"tJI:>• GoAUT'f i\mE" WIT!\. '/~ Some_wacky · and unstable people who should 1/ ' Lorenc hard for the elimination of not officially placed on ballot. Says is waiting to a fashion ably late entrance like last time. the paper Page 3 October 30, 2000 Jeep Wrangler tries out for Harper swim team by staff writer Lake Harper gained a new addi ancr plummeted into the cold, murky College police department. tion last Monday when a Jeep waters of Lake Harper, just before Police summoned a tow truck splashed into the usually calm waters 1pm. and the recovery process began, after rolling from its parking space in A witness notified the Palatine though not without its obstacles. The lot 7. and Harper College police and over tow truck, situated on grass, began The driver of the Jeep arrived at nine pieces of emergency equipment sliding towards the lake with each Harper early that day for his afternoon · arrived on-scene including police, fire, attempt to pull the half-sunken Jeep class. Leaving his Jeep in what he and medical vehicles, unaware if any out of the clouded waters. After nearly believed was the parked position, he one was present in the vehicle. It was 30 minutes of attempts, the Jeep was walked to the campus from the distant quickly determined that the vehicle finally pulled onto land and towed to lot 7. Unknown to him at the time, the was unoccupied and that the vehicle another parking lot. Jeep suddenly began to roll from its was not occupied at the time it rolled Harper College police located the space in lot 7, jumped a small curb at from the lot into the-lake, according Lt. driver of the vehicle, who later arrived the edge of the lot, barely hit a tree, Graham Johnson of the Harper with a parent to inspect the Jeep. A jeep rests half-sunken in t.ake Harper after the vehicle rolled in from its parking space in lot 7. The vehicle was unoccupied and no injuries were reported. Dreaming of a bett~r self By Dan Kurash Whether or not you take chances, skeptics try ·to put over the dreamers ABSENTEE VOTER BALLOT Music Editor you still have ·aspirations. They are as who simply reach for new stars, you important to overall health as t~e oxy will gain the understanding from within I live my life knowing that god gen we breathe to stay alive. People to aspire to who you really want to be. INFORMATION gave me the abilitY to·do anything with tend to undermine their true ability. To My future is clouded over by col in my reach. There should never be a be good individuals, we need to over lege now, but I look ahead. I look reason not to do something. Faith look negativity, and see what good beyond, but not forgetting the present Every vote counts for the Harper College rests solely within the heart, and as there really is. The good lies in our own because the present captures my state referendum on Tuesday, November 7th! long as we have this powerful tool, we minds. of mind. Whatever you want to do, you cannot be broken from what we I'm not saying you shouid sacri can. The future will be there for you to If you are a registered voter and will Important Dates: believe in. fice everything else in your life for the 'grasp. Moreover, faith equates to be unable to vote on election day, For me, faith clearly determines sake of fulfilling your dreams, but just belief, which results in the true feelings November 7th, you can apply for an September 28, 2000 First day for my life. I try to follow my beliefs as try. The key to life rests in the fact that inside of you. absentee ballot. Cook County registered voters to closely as I can. I'm not so much we all need diversity. We need morals You can never be free, if you speaking of faith as it applies to reli and motivation. don't plant the seed of need. request an application for an absen gion here, but more from the idea that I have a state of mind where I feel So aspire,and be inspired. Never Applications for absentee ballots are tee ballot. I am capable of achieving and over I must try to accomplish my dreams. I blow out the flame. Try to wash away available at the following locations: coming a lot. Faith seems a simple will probably come up short on the out shame .- Piqure your life after college October 16, 2000 First day for Cook solution to all the crap that life brings. side, but inside I will have a sense of and in the real world. Don't become a Admissions office, Room C101 County registered voters to vote I think that dreams stand in the accomplishment. robot in a suit and tie with no mind of absentee in person at village halls forefront of the human emotional state. My life will then be able to accel . your own. Office of Student Financial aRd County Clerk's office. Go for them. If you live to achieve your erate to the next level. New dreams I don't mean that being in a busi Assistance, Room A364 dreams, then life will never get dry and will surface, from year to year, and the ness environment is a bad experience, November 2, 2000 Last day that ordinary. cycle will never end. The circle of life because it may prove ·to be great. I'm TM/PS Division Office, Am. H119 County Clerk's office can accept an There will always be new step continues on. just stating the' necessity to be pre application for an absentee ballot. ping stones to conquer. Aspirations are When you carry your dreams into pared to make that kind of commit Library Circulation Desk different for everyone. Whatever they the future, be sure to remember their ment. For most. of us, we want to enjoy For further information, call 847 importance. You can't have a good life for what we wish it to be-a great may be, truth and directness apply. I Northeast Center, Room 107 925-6206. - . think that people, in general, seem future without first clearing your past. escape from the pressures that sur afraid of hanging their future on the Wherever you go from here, I think that round us. line for a dream. the experiences encountered will You have to find the fine line You can also request an application '*This information is valid for resi Dreams of fame have a slim prove to be every bit as important as between real life and dreams. For now, for an absentee ballot by mail, by dents of Cook County only. chance of success. But by simply try the knowledge gained. • as students, let us enjoy our time here phone, or online Residents of other counties in the ing, you will feel like you accomplished E11erything seems uncertain. and the people we meet. Harper district should call the something. On the other hand, dreams Take risks. Go off and do your own I Jirmly believe that people move Write to: County Clerk's office appropriate office as noted below: could also be something you want to thing, be who you want to be, achieve the weight of the world. The only way 69 W. Washington St. Suite 500 accomplish just for yourself to inter what your soul is screaming for you to • to really wash away confusion and see Chicago, IL 60607 Kane County: 630 232-5990 pret. Psychologically, conquering even do, and explore the unknown. your future at the end of the tunnel will Call: 312 603-0906 Lake County: 847 360-3610 minor achievements makes anyone Don't ever deny your ability. be to just be who you really are. Go to: www.voterinfonet.com McHenry County: 815 334-4242 feel immensely better. Under the blanket of doubt that the probably. NEVER ·be voted into office... rAt'-' I work toward giv ing power back to the fury forests res of the And has hopes Club Chick being FIRST lady. Way go Dan. the paper Page 4 October 30, 2000 But like the, head of a dY.sfunctional· family, Breuder's control is protected not by the support of those who back him, but by the silence of tho$e who don't Fear·. . and loathing. on By Craig Rot pay13rs is nowhere to be found. less to react as the president stumbled of Technology, Breuder's former .post appropriate to make a statement about Editor-In-Chief Instead of Harper president into a powder keg ·of opposition that for 16 years, can· be blamed forthe sit our support of him .. .. Dr. Breuder has Robert Breuder leading the charge in. ultimately destroyed the immediate uation we find ourselves in. The desire outstanding management skills, a "The fact was that the referendum fight, the college has · hopes of Harper. to distance themselves from his control strong vision for the future and a put its future in the hands of the Now, after eighteen months of and exploits may have come at our unique ability to plan comprehensive- Campus Master Plan developed in regrouping, the board returns with a expense, and with their deepest sym ly." ' Breuder had alienated cooperation with a community new plan c:if action and a "defend first'' pathies. But months earlier a faculty eval response team comprised of local attitude. In an article by Thomas C. Briley uation of Breuder rendered bim in a dif cumminty"leaders on'e leaders. This new referendum resonates of the Williamsport Sun-Gazette, he ferent light Less than 1 out of 5 of . Breuder might have something to with authority and craftsmanship, and says: "Robert L Breuder has resigned those polled felt his performance as by one and created an say about the November 7 referen blends smoothly the elements ofcom as president, and the polite thing would . president was satisfactory. Over half dum, but he can't The Harper College munity, education, and progress. be to allow him to move on with a viewed his performance lousy enough board of trustees has muzzled him. In Phase one offered by the community hearty pat on the back for tremendous to merit an unsatisfactory rating. atmosphere of fe~r and response to the request by his biggest response team attacks weaknesses in accomplishments. His partisans, the A severe discrepancy exists opponent-Bill Huley, president of the Harper's curriculum and set up, and few who remain, would like that, · between the judgment of those coordi loathing on the Northwest Tax Watch-to discuss the recognizes the need for classrooms of choosing to ignore reality." nating·our educations and those imple current plan at two p!,Jblic forums, the future that remain competitive in Briley· asks the question: "Why menting it campus," Breuder declared himself unavailable. this fast changing world. does Bob Br,euder have so . many A formal employee medical insur On September 12, Breuder responded-: Science, Health, and Technology detractors?" He reasons that our pres ance grievance filed by the.faculty sen Thomas C. Briley, "We are in the process of finding a buildings.have been deemed top-prior ident is a complex man, who did mar ate alleged that Breuder misrepresent member of the campaign staff who ity and designated for immediate con velous things, but went one step too ed and miscalculated employee bene · would be available for your October struction. "We support the need for a far. "Compromise is foreign to him, fits. Of the eight specific violations, with Williamsport Sun-Gazette meeting.'' referendum," said faculty senate presi even though it's vital." charges against the president including Harper passed a plan on August His presidency has come under dent Julie Fleenor of the November 7 In a later article, Briley writes: coercion •. interference, and misappro 31 to start construction on three build heavy fire from positions on and off of proposal. ''The fact was that Breuder had alienat priation ·of funds, the board and the ings, and has asked the community to campus, and the board a·ppears ·con The project holds together a ed community leaders, one by one, president offered no testimony of wit approve an $88 million referendum, a tent to relegate their general to bunker strong vision for future growth and and created an atmosphere of fear ness or evidence in his defense. stripped down version of a $128 million duty, letting him ride out this latest addresses current needs along with and/or loathing on the campus." · Then the board forced arbitration referendum that failed last year. storm sandbagged within his office the . possibility of encountering future At their August 31 board meeting, by refusing terms to repay the $1.05 Now, just when the college needs behind the wall of their support. ones. They have done their homework, . this statement was is!lued about the million owed to the employees of all the support and help it can muster, This new approach comes from and tied all tjle loose ends, save one: state of fear and loathing on Harper's Harper. "Under contract, that money the one person who seems most fit to lessons learned during the first failed our commander-in-chief. campus: "In view of recent publicity could be used to reduce insurance pre plead Harper's case to the local tax- referendum, when the board sat help- Maybe the Pennsylvania College about our president, the board felt it miums, pay for well ch.ild exams, and process. From a time wh~n only peo The project vote-smart campaign ple meeting these standards could aims their energy at students like me vote to the present: where people of all who have had it with the voting The time has come once again fol" races, genders and creeds are accept As an American, feel do not speeches and our political systems. the long awaited and much anticipated ed in the voting booths. have a voice. I live in a country where They feel that students are the majori election. The presidential election The race for equality hasn't been corporations rule, the rich make the ty of the vote and should take advan takes place once every four years in easy, but it's .a start. Surely, . it is decisions, and hard-working. men and tage of the power ihey have. There is our society and is made famous by enough to make some of our forefa women suffer to make it from day to no power through politics. earlier presidents such as George thers turn in their graves, but then day with increases in· taxes, poor edu Government today . appears Washington, Thomas Jefferson, and a again, · there are those who probably cational systems, and faulty law mak unconcerned about the well being of more recent scandalous Bill Clinton. feel a sense of pride knowing they died ing and enforcement college students. Elected officials The hoopla surrounding the elec to make this .country what it is today. America is really not the land of seem apprehensive about dealing with tion resembles closely that of a The millennium has finally the free because the government is needs of higher education. Ringling Brothers' act: The circus type arrived, and change is inevitable. As a constantly trying to integrate them If the government wants people feel of the election only adds to the citizen, you can follow the path to anar selves into the lives of its people. to vote, they should encourage the hysteria that the election brings about .chy and criticize . the country that has I refuse to vote for another corpo presidential candidates to be more And then, just as soon as it begins, it is given you a right to do so, or you can rate suit who could care less about honest with people. Politicians appear over, and one lucky opponent lives out actually do something about your dis to be liars, and looking at Bush and his days in a nicely furnished White pleasure. Television tells me there are only Gore, they act like used car salesmen House while the other opponent Protest for that which yotT don't two choices. trying to make a Yugo look like a watches from the street in utter dis~p believe in, write letters to Congress One has .a track record of being a Ferrari. pointment about a less than satisfactory perfor sadistic governor who wouldn't offer a The political framework of th is The nice thing about the election mance in the White House, or more stay of execution for someone who country is built around scandals, lies, is that the winner is -decided by the simply, VOTE! may have been innocent of murder. ·. corporations, and money. The fact that American public. But, the election The concept of voting has been And the other has credibility issues, I, as an American citizen, am being wasn't always rLJn this way. initiated since our country's infancy, and a history of censorship. · asked by my country to choose which As an American soqiety, we can and has undergone many metamor I would rather see Harry Browne jackass will sit atop the framework trace our roots back to the colonial era phoses to become revered all over the run ag.ainst Ralph Nader. But the seems funny. during the 1sth century. Aft~r fighting world as it is today. With that in mind, · media tells us we have to ·vote republi It is a crock and I will not buy into can or democrat Why should I waste with Great Britain for independence, why not vote? their politics and I certainly will not buy our forefathers struggled to giye equal It is a proven fact that there is 10 minutes of my life voting for either · into some great American tradition that ity its due for the infant nation. more cynicism towards politics in this of them, because my television is tells me that I have to vote .. I'd rather Ironically, equality for our forefa day and age than ever before. The telling me.to? watch baseball, a real American tradi thers meant that only middle-class, American public is now more aware of I am a common person who, like tion. landowning, white men could vote. But scandals ta.king place in our govern- other common people, holds no weight look how far America has come in the or place on this Earth. I am a puppet of Continued on pg. -8 a corporate possessed population. the paper Page 5 October 30, 2000 I I I possibly even medication," Fleenor the Pennsylvania School of said. "For all 700 employees of Harper, Technology, and our president, Robert not just the faculty." Breuder, is to blame. You're invited to By reinforcing Breuder's behavior Sixteen years of silence ended at with a 4.4% pay raise in July, even if his last post with an exhaustive evalu a free coJjege his contract demands it, the board sev ation and his tendered resignation. ered the final tendon between faculty Even after all he · had accomplished funding and administration. · and built, the community felt relieved In a statement by Rob he had finally gone. workshop at · Brumbaugh, a member of the commu "When will someone finally say nity response team, to the Harper 'no' to'this spoiled brat?" Pleaded a for Harper College. College board of trustees at a special mer community member in a 1995 let meeting introducing the master plan, ter tb the editor. "How much longer can he says: "Effective communication will the community afford Dr. Breuder?" generate support from the community; Let's learn from the mistakes Learn how to save ineffective communication will under made by the Pennsylvania College of thousands of dol mine the college's future." Technology; our president needs to . Whether he chooses to acknowl- know that our educations are more lars at the College . edge the findings ·of the evaluation or important than his ego-more impor not, Breuder's 79% un·satisfactory rat tant than his id. of your choice. ing for his communication skills clearly As students, we sincerely hope establishes a pattern of behavior ·that that he would be just as concerned seriously threatens Harper's future.- with the quality of our educations as he Only 6 out of 100 rated him satis- is with the future plans for the campus. workshop · As customers, we expect the president to provide the best quality covers: product possible in an environment · where to get the "Effective communica- focused on our needs. As community members and vot money. tion will generate sup ers, we issue a warning to our presi · getting money dent: educate our minds, don't castrate port from the commu them; this school was created with us even if you don't in mind, not you, and we, those in qualify for need nity; ineffective com search of opportunity, will be here long after you realize you missed yours. based aid The president of Harper needs to munication will under: be held accountable for his actions, not · maximizing your. endorsed and rewarded for them: As ais pack<:lge. mine the college's long .as he speaks for us, the_ true needs of Harper's students will be · how to negotiate a future,"· threatened, and their futures endan . better package. gered. Rob Brumbaugh, com rial exercise of power. In my first, and intimidating stare and a commentary The gung-ho, all or nothing, repu probably only meeting with Breuder, I constructed loosely around the ideal tation of Breuder may be fit for stalking RESERVATIONS munity respose team found him to be everything the hype that our informal "get to know you" was prey, but when it undermines the trust REQUIRED had warned. ·· really a formal "get to know me." built through years of hard work and . member I found nothing in his demeanor, On the defensive, and under cooperation with the community, the posture, or persona to dispute the pressure, the opportunity to confront only sacrifice will be the potential of Harper College description offered by Briley and oth- him never presented itself, even if the each and every student alienated by ers. desire had. By shaking hands I sealed his decisions. November 8-9, 2000 factory in areas of rapport, ability to lis I had hoped to discover a misun- my fate as an accomplice, forever . Breuder's tarnished image dimin 7:00pm ten and adapt to campus concerns, . derstood man, isolated from appeal by stained by my silence . ishes ·the desirability of Harper as a accessibility, conflict negotiation and his own unique inspiration and desire, But like the head of a .dysfunction whole, and threatens a lineage of resolution, respect for diverse attitudes who would offer a glimpse, even if only al 'family, Breuder's control is p·rotected excellence, atiroad and within, that Call847.99L1724 and perspectives, and honesty. momentary, of his intentions. Instead I not by the acclamations of those who . was in place long before he arrived, Briley cif the Sun-Gazette stumbled into a wall of resentment, and support him, but by the silence_of those and will return once he is gone. · Ext. 0 to Register described Breuder as a leader whose a man oblivious of his detractions. who don't. The atmosphere of fear and vision was equaled only by his dictato- · The president offered only an loathing exists at Harper just as it did at the paper Page 6 'l October 30, 2000 Harper renames. observatory to honor herO ' , . . . " . f . . . He flew in space and died on Everest, now· Karl G. Heinze's name will -live on thr~ugh Harper's observatory By Roshni Mudgal attempting to summit the north face of old and has to be manually operated. Staff Writer Mount Everest Built in 1882, by the Rev. Dr. John The Harper College observatory Paul Sipiera said that in today's Peate, the 12-inch reflecting telescope · was rededicated to Karl G.. Henize on world, students want immediate was purchased in 1902 by Kansas SepterT]ber 15 for its 1Oth anniversary. answers. They want high paying jobs Wesleyan University. Joseph DuPont _Planetary Studies Foundation donated as soon as they gradu_ate. But, they donated the telescope to Harper the name to Harper. could learn from Henize's life and his · College in 1988 in honor of his father. Paul Sipiera, professor of geology message that in ·order to achieve, peo Considerable fund raising efforts and-astronomy at Harper since 1974, ple ·must sacrifice and put in time and led to the construction of the' observa said the observatory was dedicated dedication. So in the end success will tory. The Harper College Educational after Dr. Heinze because his life would be theirs. Foundation, The Astronomy Club, the be a good message for students. Dr. Dr. Henize visited Harper Cl!lllege / Student Senate, and many individuals · Henize had to wait for 18 years to fly on - in 1991 . He talked to the students and provided assistance. the space shuttle. also took_a tour of the observatory. The observatory is used for He was selected by NASA as a Loren Acton; astronaut and course work for both credit and non scientist-astronaut in August of 1967, astronomer, attended the dedication credit classes and utilizes continuing but it was not until the summer of 1985 ceremony. She worked with Heinze in education, the astronomy department, - that his long awaited opportunity to go space during the shuttle mission. and astronomy club to maximize its into space came on the 19th shuttle The observatory is open to the time. mission. public every other week from March Over 20,000 people have visited A habitual workaholic, HeirJze through November, opening at sunset the observatory over the past 10 years. planned missions, lectured, and was Staff members ·and volunteers work November 4 and November 18 are the an associate professor of astronomy at with helping guests. In total, the obser two remaining dates remaining on this the University of Texas while waiting for vatory houses. six telescopes, including year's schedule. For more ·information his opportunity to go into space. At the a new computer controlled telescope on the observatory, contact Paul time of his flight, Henize was the oldest that uses coordinate tracking for pin Sipiera at 925-6726. astronaut at 58 years. point accuracy. He died on Oct. 5, 1993, while The oldest telescope is 118 years with Metra's $5 weekend Pass Metra·s $5 Pass TURN AFUN WEEKEND INTO GREAT UNLIMITED RIDES savinss with a FREE lNcard! an weekend Ions! Take advantage of Metra's Weekend Pass right now. a chance to win dinner for two at Flat Top Grill or For only $5, you get unlimited rides on Metra tt:ains Ranalli's, tickets for two to Blue Man Group, and all weekend long. Then, your used pass is good for a other great prizes! 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In addi ule information call836-7000, city or suburbs, or visit tion, if you join the INcard Club now, you will have metrarail.com. ,.--. - -~ - ~- - . •. .· \'!\ . ~ - w· F" ) . ~~l(S 'L~t Flf\1'"f:OP @INIIft and 1000's of others.:. r Athletics Football·- Cro~s· Country - Soccer - Golf By Brian Samuelson • year after a stunning 27-7 victory over sons to the Lady Chaparrals, the Staff Writer Waldorf College with the likes of quar SOCCER Hawks finally defeated them in their terback Griff Jurgens, who completed The men's soccer team, now in final game of the season. 1 There has been much happening 18 of 28 passes for 189 yards and two full effect, find themselves in the mid in the Harper world of sports this year; touchdowns, and unstoppable dle of a three game winning streak to GOLF including an all-time winningest junior defense from Darryl Eberhardt, Robert boost them to a 5-8-1 season. This Tony LaFrenere the first year football head coach, the reactivation of Cross, and Carlos Pettiford to help comes at a crucial time in the season head golf coach best summed up the men and women's cross-country, and lead the way. Upcoming games are having began with a less than c6mpli year his golf team was having when he a men's soccer team in the midst of a against Rock Valley and Grand Rapids mentary 0-3 start to please last yec;~r ' s said; "We (have) had a roller coaster three game winning streak. The sports away, and at home against Joliet for assistant and this ye~u · s head ·coach season." season has been left open to a year of the final game of the season. Bill Niemeyer. That can apply to Harper sports unpredictability, surprise and frustra Unfortunately, our ladies fell short in general, taking all of the factors into tion. CROSS COUNTRY completing the year with a 6-10-2 consideration. Along with records that If you haven't reaily seen or read record, but not after amb i dextro~s were less than mediocre, the Harper FOOTBALL many newsworthy stories or events kicker and leading scorer Kristina Bratt athletic program also brings a sense of Noteworthy is 30-year veteran from the Harper men and women's finished the season with 19 goals and excitement to the forefront along with football head coach John Eliasik. He cross country team recently, that's 12 assists; the best by any lady Hawk a newfound meaning of the word ded began the season as the all-time win probably because there hasn't been a in history since the sports initiation ication. ningest active junior college coach in cross country team here at Harper for four years ago. With some newly set and broken the nation. Beginning his illustrious the past 12 years. For the ladies it was a season full records this year, and with teams in career in 1971, Eliasik has experi With the recent reactivation of the of record-breaking despite their losing contention for the playoffs, the Harper enced an overall record of 207 wins, sport, Harper joins an ensemble of 20 record. Their record was, in fact, the sports has helped to bestow a sense 106 losses, and 3 ties, a feat which other area teams, most of them being best the lady Hawks have ever posted. of pride among the students, faculty, has earned him a place in both the four year colleges, to compete for the And as for losing three straight sea- and staff. Region IV and NJCAA Hall of Fame. championship this year. With the He, along with the Harper Hawks emergence of Ahmed and Assad football team, are attempting to win Alghazali, native siblings of Iraq, a way Harper Flu Program their third straight N4C conference and has been paved for the team; a team Region IV championships this fall, with who has not only managed to surprise Get Vaccinated help from 15 returning sophomores of but also delight coaches and fans last season. alike. . Harper College is offering the flu vaccine for $11.00. "We have a solid core of veter Finishing in the top half at almost A registered nurse from Northwest Community Hospital ans, and 11 of our 15 returning sopho every meet, this new team along with ·has been scheduled for Tuesday, November 14 and mores started most or all games for us the women's Tracie Thoele, Corrie Wednesday, November 15 from 12130 pm 'til 3:30pm. last year," said Eliasik, and; "that's Clark, and Kristina Soukop have all If you are interested in receiving the immunization, always a good place to start." managed to give Hawk fans some The Hawks are now 5-2 on the thing to be proud of. please contact Becky Santler at 925-6849 .. Decisions, · decisions, decisions. And the next one Harper Newman Society you make is a biggle. Soon you'll earn 1our Associate's Degree. And then what? How about a Badlelor's Harper College . Degree from DeVry? Professors with real-world experience will teGch JOU in small classes and wei equipped labs. You11 eniof hands-on learning that gives you tile skills rou need to Come and join the newest way of becoming GHIIpete and succeed in today'sledlnology based busiReSS World. more spiritually moved with.your life to God. Choose from Bac:helor's Degrees in bunting, Business Atlolinistrafion, Everyone is welcomed; it's a fresh, new way of meeting Computer Information Systetns, Eledronks Engi~ TedmOiogy, Information peopl.e, getting involved, and, of course, having fun Technology, Technkol Monogement, and Telecommunkations Management. You're just that dose to fulftlhng JOUr dreams. •• as dose as a degree from DeVry. We meet every Wednesday at For a higller degree of suuess, call DeVry's Chicago campus at (773) 929-6SSO, 3 p ~ m. for Mass in Room A-243. the Addison campus at (630) 953-2000, or the fmley Park campus at(708) 342-3100. After Mass, we gather for a good time; For more info. call James Skyles or Marcos Lushpynskyj. www.D.I\Ia'.., Office Number (847) 925-6771 A ...... oiiUCCIII. 0 2000 O.Vry tJnMnily. / Learning .licks from "Chicago's Finest Guitarist" By Dan Kurash I consider myself lucky to have Music Editor been studying beneath him, and feel my potential as a musical artist Mike McKissack, guiitar can only be fulfilled because of him. teacher; player, and performer, The peak of McKissack's trains musicians with an extensive career came when his knowledge base acquired from former band, years of practice, study and per formance. His students ben efit from his tremendous dedication and desire; culti vating an inner creativity that inspires patience ·and determination. New World Amphitheater for a crowd of around 30,000. Their seiHitled CD, released in '97 by Rip Records, only hints at his when he mines artistic merit, even· if the band .has ·can't get a certain t~chnique or idea the type of since dissolved. Other bands he down, then comes back to it later, sound you'll get." has played with have performed at with a fresh attitude and approach. On a personal level, McKissack many local clubs including the "This type of routine just works for won an award that claimed him House of Blues, the Metro, and the - me," he says, ''People all have their· "1994 . Chicago's Finest Guitarist" Double Door. own way of practicing." hosted by Gand Music. His hard To be a well-rounded musician, Working on certain ideas that work certainly paid of. McKissack says: "A good practice are similar to one another helps to Patience. Determination. routine should incorporate a little of see connections on the guitar. Creativity. All these ideals I am everything like technical and cre McKissack constantly seeks new beginning to understand because of ative work." His own practice rou ideas, which build off talents he has him. He has helped mold my sound tine consists of scales, speed and already mastered. i"nto something' I am proud of. If I rhythm exercises, technical work This. technique applies to any stick to these ideals, I can one day and songwriting; which can oceupy thing like songwriting, scale and become anything, _especially a .· as much as six hours of his day (if arpeggio exercises, or figuring out musician. not more.) new chords. Eventually, all the jig From studying under him, I Focusing for this long may saw pieces begin to come together realize that I am capable of putting become too much. So McKissack to form an overall knowledge base on a successful show in front of recommends taking a break some on the guitar. people. Part of my nervousness lies where in between. This does· two "Guitar is an unforgiving instru in the pos.sibility of messing up on things. It relaxes weary hands, and ment," McKissack states. "Anyone stage. But, I just have to get out it also takes your mind off of the can play a note on the piano by there and experience it. I know I instrument. pressing down a key. But on the can, and I will. He walks away from the guitar guitar, the way you play a note )( the paper Page 9 October 30, 2000 By Dan Kurash reflection of their greatest hits. Music Editor They also played mellow, acoustic anthems like "Elderly Restless confusion. Frozen Woman Behind the Counter in a fans drunk for warmth. Alpine Small Town;', and "Daughter". Theater in Wisconsin played host New songs like "Light Years" for one hell of a Pearl Jam concert, off of the most recent album, even if more people chose to smok~ Binaural, and "Wishlist" off of 98's grass rather than listening to the Yield played into the nighttime SkY opening act, Supergrass. I feel priv Picture a beam of white light being ileged to be a part of the coldest gig all of Pearl Jam's songs. By dis Pearl Jam has admittedly ever persing the white light through a played. clear prism, as demonstrated on the However, Pearl Jam did a cover art of Pink Floyd's Dark Side tremendous job of keeping the of the Moon, all colors of the rain crowd entertained. Since the tem bow emerge. perature put a damper on every All those col.o.rs act as Pearl one's mood, they played many of Jam's set list, whicli sets an array of their hits to ease the fans minds diversity in therr matfi)rial. lt's -evi away from the cold and onto the dent that they care for their fans by music. giving them a great show even Vedder and the boys, in fac( . though being on stage in the cold played songs from each of their six_ may have been extremely tough to studio albums. Cranking out hits off perform. of 91's debut album Ten like British band Supergrass :!Jer~my"; "Black"; my peliSonal opened, and while their sound favorite PJ song, and "Alive", it soon couldn't be worse than 311 , every . became clear that they intended to one put most emphasis on hearing make the ~how not so much to play Pearl Jam. No one really paid atten their newest material, but more of a tion to them. I got the impression ''I wish I was a neutron bomb For once I could go off." Top: The cover of Pearl Jam's most recent album, "Binaural," Below: -Wishlist Eddie Vedder at a recent Pearl Jam Concert. from listening to Supergrass, that and downs. Pearl Jam's the British rock scene has an all too With the Nirvana - Pearl Jam straight-forward, • monotonous conflicts of the grunge-rock· scene sound. I could hear a little of The in the early 90s, and their record CDs Who and The Verve in their music, label and Ticketmaster ·problems, but the music failed due to its paral they have certainly rode the ride of lel path of similarity. rock & roll with seatbelts. Pearl Jam During the first encore, Vedder emerged out of Seattle and into the came back onstage with a sign that world's spotlight. Ten he taped to a PA amp, wtiich read As long as their passion for "Let Nader Debate." As any Pearl · their sound remains, then there will Epic Records Jam fan knows, Vedder has always be no denying Pearl Jam as one of had a "politics is bulls**t" political the best bands of the 90s, and now attitude. continuing into the new century. Vs. He feels that third parties don't Even the dismal sales of their receive as much publicity as fourth album No Code didn't stop Epic Records Republicans and Democrats. I them from a· heavy touring sched agree with him, and so did the ule. V~dder even joked about sales Vita logy crowd by finding his antics extreme of the album basically stating that ly humorous. little or no profit was earned. Epic Records Using strobe lights and all When you mess with the busi other kinds of colored lights, the ness side of music, someone light show lit up the sky perfectly, always gets knocked down. But, No Code which backed up their performance Pearl Jam stood right up again . profoundly. It always looks like They laugh about it now because Epic Records Vedder has a seizure onstage when since that album, they have put out he sings. Watch him and_ you'll two albums, Yield and Binaural, Yeild know what I mean. which have overall been better tl:lan "Dissident" and "Glorified G" their third album Vitalogy, and the off 'of their second album Vs., also fourth No Code. Epic Records played. The energy put forth on I recommend buying their new stage demonstrated the band's material, which portrays Pearl Binatu~ai dedication to putting on a good Jam's great rock of their earlier show. Their whole career has been work. Listen hard and good. I'm Epic Records geared towards the fans. However: certain you'll enjoy. they have certainly had their ups the paper · · Page 1 0 October 30, 2000 · Vote tion, are we voting for more than a something. cont'd. from pg. 4 presidency? Perhaps. Use books and the library as a Perhaps America wants to see · source· as well. You may find some- ment, which is a possible reason as to generally good, decent people making thing out concerning a candidate that ABSENTEE VOTER BALLOT the decline in ·voter turnout in years decisions· in the White House . as you did not know prior to your research, past. · opposed . to the dishonest, cheating, and you may very well discover that Need we be reminded of Thomas promiscuous men we have had to _deal · _you do not want to vote at all based on INFORMATION Jefferson and his alleged affair with a with in the past. your findings and that is acceptable as slave which arose in the news a few Role models, who Americans and well. - Every vote counts for the Harper College years ago only to be proved true? Or their children can lookup to and admire. One of great things about living in how about the alleged promiscuity in And why not? Not to say that there this country is that voting is the one offi- referendum on Tuesday, November 7th! the White House in the form of have not been good roie models in the . cial form of expressing our true opinion. President John F. Kennedy and Marilyn past, it just -seems in the present day For when the eleCtion comes to an end If you are a registered voter and will Important Dates: Monroe, or an even more recent story and age these role models have been and the votes are tallied, there comes a be unable to vote on election day, involving a White House intern and our hard to come by. sense of belonging knowing that you November 7th, you can apply for an September 28, 2000 First day for current president? · One thing we as Americans must are a part of the percentage of citizens absentee ballot. Cook County registered voters to Politicians have been known to - do if we are to forget our troubled past ~ who have attempted to make a change request an application for ari absen cheat in order to achieve victory; such and move forward is to accept that based on their vote. Applications for absentee ballots are tee ballot. was the case concerning President imperfections in our leaders are some- The number which has been available at the following locations: Nixon in the early 70's when he thing with which we must always deaL associated with either the winner or the October 16, 2000 First day for Cook resigned his presidency before Do nortake your cynicism out on loser belongs to you as well, for you Admissions office, Room C1 01 County registered voters to vote Congress was given the opportunity to -the next leader because the previous · have helped America in the one way in absentee in person at village halls impeach. one had fidelity problems. Imperfection which you can. Yes, America has a Office of Student Financial and County Clerk's office. Cynicism is more than something and scandal may be something that is long way to go before we wipe out the Assistance, Room A364 spread through the press medium. always evident in Congress, but when it likes of racism, homelessness, and illit- November 2, 2000 Last day that Rock musicians have been known to comes down to it, come November 7th eracy, but we have come a long way TM/PS Division Office, Rm. H119 County Clerk's office can accept an speak out against the pr~sent state of application for an absentee ballot. society as well; such was the case with it is not the moral character we should too. be voting on, but rather who will best . The decision is up to you, I know Library Circulation Desk rock music group Rage Against the For further information, call 847 lead this great country to prosperity. where I will be come November 7th, I Machine. Rage btJilt a career based on Northeast Center, Room 107 925-6206. the ideals of anarchy, and from a recent If you want to vote on November will be in the voting booth casting my music video "Testify," the group pre 7th, hopefully you are by now. regis- vote, attempting for the first time to offi- You can also request an application *This information is vaUd for resi sents a startling statistic that roughly tered. Harper offers registration for the cially make ·a difference. for an absentee ballot by mail, by dents of Cook County only. 100 million registered American voters ·students. Perhaps you as a student do Perhaps the man I vote for will not phone, or online Residents of other counties in the will not participate in the 2000 · not know where to begin in your bout win, but I take great pride in knowing Harper district should call the Presidential Election due to the lack of with the candidates and where each that I live in a country where change · Write to: County Clerk's office appropriate office as noted below: a real choice on the ballot. one stands on certain _topics. · can be made and a making a difference 69 W. Washington St. Suite 500 Now this should come as a sur There is always the ever-so-useful · is possible. The great thing about this Chicago, IL 60607 Kane County: 630 232-5990 prise when Americans find themselves Internet, but remember to only use country is that on November 7th you Call: 312 603-0906 Lake County: 847 360-3610 in the midst of an age which has seen sites ending in the suffix .gov, for these can either decide to vote or not, the Go to: www.voterinfonet.com McHenry County: 815 334-4242 Americans given more rights now than are legitimate government sites and not irony lies in the· fact that if you do not, in years past. Which raises the ques- just aimed at persuading yo~ to buy you have the freedom to do so. THINK YOU-KNOW BARAT COllEGEil Take-advantage of the Harper"""Barat College Dual Admission Agreement! Bachelor's Completion Programs Business • Entrepreneurial Studies • Business Leadership • Marketing • Accounting ' Regionally Recognized Teacher Education Criminal Studies • Legal Studies Pre-Med Open House Dates at Barat Environmental Studies November 8, 2000 - 5:30 p.m. to ~:30 p.m. Computer Information Systems - Dec-:mber 7, 2000- 5:30p.m. to 6:30p.m. JAVA Programming . . Interdisciplinary Studies Programs Barat College be at Harper Put your transfer credits to work as you will design your own major! Nov~mber _28, 2000 - I 0 a.m. to I p.m. Students have designed programs in: • E-Marketing • E-Publishing _ RSVP for open house by calling Diane Yakapovich at 847.295.4053 or john Brezak at 847.615.5673 • Computer Graphics and Web Design Barat College 1.877.0KBARAT- www.barat.edu the paper · Page 11 October 30, 2000 Local ~usicia~ ·opens for . . a m· my n0 mI ne e fans.People have been telling Plent}'~e~::c~:n~el~:~:hyTo~~~~~ r . . ~k~m!~~;a6'h~~~t f~~~ s~t"~:;~~;~ P~f. ~~~~~.. e!b~~~al~e~ ~~~~ e~~tl:~ G · After hearing this a dozen times army brat who finally gets to stake over, she finally decided to have a her claim as the most P.OPUiar girl in By Collin Souter Not a huge deal, since Rundman and Hemingway's hus- listen to one of ''that chick's" CD's, . suburbia, thanks to her mothers'· Staff Writer Hemingway had planned on u.sing band, Randy Kirkman. Hemingway and she has been a fan of Aimee Kooi-Aid and her swimming pool in the day to prepare for her five-week spent the whole day trying to make Mann ever since. However, the backyard. · Local pop · . artist Beki tour across the country in support of sure Jonathan would be available -" Hemingway's influences range from . My mom makes the best Kool Hemingway has had some bad luck her album, "Too Much Plenty." It and that Randy had a ride from work Maria McKee to Sam Phillips to Patti Aid/Everyone is . playing in my trying to see one of her favorite would also be a good evening to to the gig. Griffin and basically, "a lot of female yard/Look at me-l'm popular singers, Juliana Hatfield, live in con- kick back and relax a bit. Then, the "I'm sorry I'm not Juliana singer-songwriters who are lesser Most of tier songs, though, stay cert. ·First, she and her friends phone rang. Juliana Hatfield had Hatfield," she said with a charming known," she says. "But I love Aimee true to love-and-relationships with drove down to the legendary been taken ill, and Harper College smile to the pleasantly surprised Mann." insight and warmth. She dedicated Cabaret Metro, only to find the show needed a.new opening act and fast! audience. "I'll be your substitute Hemingway started her career one of her songs, "Tippie Toe," to her had sold out. "It definitely threw a wrench in teacher for the evening," she joked. in a bubblegum pop band called husband. Hemingway and her hus- The· second time, Hemingway things," says Hemingway, who She proceeded to sing a song about "This Train." The band called it quits band spend time at their apartment had some difficulty staying in the refused to divulge her age. "But a stage fright entitled "All The Time." after members of the band got hired in Oak Park. Her husband's admira- • same area·as Hatfield, as they both good wrench." The trio performed 10 songs to play back-up for the late Richard tion for Aimee Mann is evident in the toured at the same time. A few It turned out to be quite a hec- and made a good impression on Mullins. "So, they all left me behind, songs he writes for his wife to per- months later, she heard that Hatfield tic day for this up-and-coming plat- their audience. Hemingway's CD and 1 said 'that's okay. I'll go on."' form. would be opening for Aimee Mann inurn blonde pop singer who sounds sold well durin€! intermission and She released a solo 6-track EP You can buy her album, Too at Harper College on October 19. as though Mann had an influence even more so after Mann's set. She cleverly titled rinse. repeat, with Much Plenty, at your local Border's Guess what? on her. Her band consists of two stood in the lobby and graciously songs dealing with love and relation- Book and Music, or order online at Sold out. people (besides herself): Jonathan signed copies for her new-found ships amongst friends. www.pastemusic.com. (***1/2) By Collin Souter staff writer · Darren Aronofsky's Requiem For A Dream seems at first like a tried and true drug addiction story consisting of two characters in love, . their un-knowing parents, and drug deals that go wrong . The film also employs halluci- nothing but grapefruit and eggs all feel like a person again. natory sequences reminiscent of day. Soon, she has hallucinations I believe this will be Burstyn's Trainspotting and The Basketball of her dead husband and her vibrat Oscar clip, and deservedly so. Of Diaries. Magically, it results in a film ing, taunting refrigerator due to mal the four lost souls depicted in this as powerful and provocative as its nourishment. · tragedy, hers stands out the most. predecessors. Through her story, Aronofsky Quite a statement since the It doesn't so much tell a story makes a point about how the media movie unflinchingly takes us down so much as it created a mood and induces our addictions. into their own private hells for the atmosphere. It shows us the lives of Greedy telemarketing schemes third act. The movie's lyrical first addicts, those who have addictions and infomercials taking advantage half shows Leto and Connelly lying and those on their way to having of the sick and the old have not in bed side by side. addictions. o~en been covered in movies lately, Oddly enough, Aranofsky uses Jared Leto plays · Harry and I think Aronofsky's message a split screen, and even stranger, it Goldfarb, who has an addiction to has come at the perfect time. works wonders. We see Leto talk shooting up. When we meet the Aronofsky doesn't hold any ing about her beauty . on one half character, the addiction has only thing back as we watch Sara go while his hands lightly caress her started taking its·toll. He tries to sell from a lonely widower who just beautiful skin on the other. his mother's television, but he can wants to look good in her red dress Compare that to the fate of still walk upright and form coherent (when supposedly going before the Connelly's character when she sentences without screaming. cameras) to a raving lunatic in need arrives at a private 'sex party and Jennifer Connelly plays his girl of shock therapy. you get a powerful representation of . friend, Marion, who sees a shrink so The effects of drug-taking-be the destruction of a human spirit. I she can still get handouts from her it heroin or diet pills-has also been found it hard to decide which char parents. God forbid she gets a job. perfectly conveyed. Aronofsky uses acter I sympathized with the most. Marion Waynes makes a dra one-shot time-lapse shots to convey Requiem For A Dream will matic departure as Tyrone, Harry's the speedy lifestyle of taking speed, most likely upset some people. It drug buddy. The two arrange drug while at the same time going slo-mo certainly will not warm your heart. deals; look for ways to get money to convey how time slowly passes With its daring filmmaking, for drugs and groove to hip-hop like torture when being deprived of a rapid-fire pace, brilliant perfor trance music while doing drugs. daily habit, in this case food. mances-especially Burstyn-and But the film really belongs to We also get a repetitive edit of its insightful comment on the corre Ellyn Burstyn, who plays Harry's pills being popped, pupils dilating, lation between media and drug mother, Sara Goldfarb, the ultimate sighs of ecstasy, rolled-up bills, usu addiction, Requiem will leave those victim of addiction. Her downward ally ending with a shot of the one who decide to take the chance feel spiral starts when she accepts an thing over which anybody has any ing winded by the time the credits offer from a telemarketer who gives power: the TV' remote control. roll. Maybe even terrified. her the "You have already won!" I went back and ·forth on One thing is for certain: You . pitch . . whether or not I liked the film as it won't soon forget it. If she accepts a diet plan and progressed. I decided I liked it loses 50 lbs., she can be featured when Aronofsky stopped cutting in on her favorite TV show/infomercial. order for Burstyn to openly talk to To her, "can" means "will." She her son about her loneliness, her the paper Page 12 October 30, 2000 Minus hoe((ev "'as((s anfl ehain· saws, +hese l(ie((s wi(( s+i(( seare - - +he he(( out ol vou By Collin Souter with no gore, no fangs and hardly any Beauty. Yes, this movie has a dude din·ner and wishing his sister into car Followed by a sequel, Tetsuo 2: Body staff writer special effects. It seamlessly mixes whose head gets chopped off and toonland; the most dangerous zone of Hammer. film nair and western, abandoning the uses it to ... Well, you'll just have)o rent all. Dante's wonderfully deranged (No star rating ... too weird) (In alphabetical order) horror movie aspect altogether, mak it and see. The film came out in 1985. vision pre-dates Tim Burton by a few ing it one of the great anti-horror films. Its wicked sense of humqr and inven years. The anthology comes to a ARACHNOPHOBIA Director Frank The score by 80's icons Tangerine tive use of gore holds up beautifully thrilling climax with George Miller's PATCH ADAMS One of the most dis Marshall showed he learned a th ing or Dream add to the tension, and Bill today, rendering it a true classic. It take on the classic episode Terror at gusting and revolting horror shows of two from Jaws director Steven Paxton, in one of his earlier films, spawned a surprisingly good sequel, 50,000 Feet, starring John Lithgow as all time. I'm getting sick just thinking Spielberg. Marshall's tale of poiso showcases his comedic talents with Bride Of The Re-Animator, starring a nervous airline passenger who can't about it. Robin Williams plays a doctor nous spiders invading a small town will the immortal line, "Finger-lickin' good!" most of the same cast members. help but ·notice a slimy gremlin on the make anybody with the titular phobia (****) You'll never throw away dead tissue wing of the airplane. Treat these last cling to their can of Raid. Be sure to again. (****) · two episodes as short films before your tickle the back of your feflow viewers PARENTS My favorite David Lynch feature attraction. neck with a feather during a moment ot · film that David Lynch had nothing to do RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD First two stories: *" Last two: **** suspense. with. Randy Quaid and Mary Beth Okay, I'll . spare you the confusion. (Dante) and ***1/2 (Miller) Starring Jeff Daniels, Harley Jane Hurt star as two loving parents living in ~tay with me here. George Romero Kozak, Julien Sands and a scene a perfect 1950's suburbia who try to directed Night Of The Living Dead. It TETSUO: THE IRON MAN I don't real stealing John Goodman as the local instill good Clean moral lessons orr spawned two sequels: Dawn of the ·ly recommend this unless . you exterminptor. (***) their perpetually suspicious and fright- Dead and Day of the Dead. No more. absolutely crave experimental film This film has nothing to do with making of the highest order. I brought DEAD-ALIVE For some people, scary Romero's mostly brilliant trilogy of ter it up to prove a point. This Japanese means gory. The sight of intestines ror. Nor does its sequel, Return of the black-and-white _nightmare of a ~lm who threatens his patients with more spflling out onto the 'hardwood floor or Living Dead, Part 2 .. . or 3, 4 and 5 for tells the story {I suppose) of a guy jokes unless tl},ey start. laughing. a brain slipping out of someone's era· that matter. This funny and entertain slowly mutating into a machine. You Creepy, disturbing and just plain nium makes for a Wild cinematic roller ing take on th~ zombie genre makes a can rent it at Blockbust~r (Puss) Video. wrong. coaster ride. If this best describes good follow up to Romero's first Living Now, while Blockbuster objects to you (ZERO _STARS) your sensibilities, look no further than Dead film. Its cle}'er use of punk rock watching the unedited versions of · Peter Jackson's ode to bad taste and and talking zombies ("More brains!") Dead-Alive and Re-Animator- two the Oedipus complex. Timothy Blame makes it stand out from other punk harmless movies with good morals - plays a man who has to look after his rock/talking zombie movies. (***1/2) they seem overly delighted when ailing mother after she receives a bite you visit their store and bring from a Simian Rat Monkey at the local SOMETHING WICKED THIS WAY home with you a movie where a zoo, turning her into an even more COMES This would make a perfect · man's penis turns into a power hideous zombie. This eventually leads double feature with Lady In White. A drill .while he has sex with his to the entire town becoming zombies, mysterious carnival comes and ·grants friend. Wow! What a difference! the kind that like to fornicate on the wishes to the citizens of a small town. Thanks, dining room table and give birth to Two young boys get curious and find lockbuster! baby zombies. The final hour of this that the wishes come at a hefty price. film pushes the limits of cinematic gore From a story by Ray Bradbury, this coming up with new and inventive Shares the same atmospheric qualities ways to do away with those zombiefied of Lady, and also benefits from fine pests. Ever try mowing a few down performances from Jonathan Pryce, as with a· Black and Decker lawn mower? ened young child. Some kids walk in the foreboding ringmaster/genie and How about decapitating one and on t.heir parents having sex, some walk Jason Robards as the father of one of putting its head in a blender? This in during a heated argument .. this kid the young boys. Perfect for the kids as movie will ~killfully show you the des walks in on his parents gorging on well. (***1 /2) and-don'ts of caring for your living human remains. I think we can all dead community. Take notes. - relate to that. Sample dialogue: TWILIGHT ZONE- THE MOVIE Fast IMPORTANT NOTE: Be sure you get BOY: Mom, what are we eating? forward through the first two and watch the UN-RATED version, which MOM: Leftovers. the last two stories of this 1983 anthol Blockbuster (Puss) Video does NOT BOY: What were they before they ogy film based on the log-running TV · carry. If it says A-RATED, put it back were leftovers? . _ and rent your movies from a store that MOM: Before they were leftovers, doesn't care what you watch. (***1/2) they were ... Leftovers to be. (***) LA~Y IN W/::IITE Frank LaLoggia's RE-ANIMATOR Dr. Herbert West has spooky ghost .story . makes for perfect discovered an agent used to re-ani viewing for parents looking for scary mate dead tissue. He tests it on his movies their kids can watch. Lucas roommate's cat and, low and behold, it Haas (11 -years old- here) plays works! This cult-favorite has been Frankie, a boy who gets locked in a enjoying a resurgence' of popularity school closet on Halloween and wit since Kevin Spacey and Wes Bentley nesses the murder of a little girl. .. that got stoned and spoke of it in American happened a year ago. Danny Glover has nothing to do with it th is time. This . _, atmospheric sleeper beautifully con veys the feel ing of being young at show. John Landis' story of a bigot Halloween time, with plenty of scares . who gets his just desserts has the dark along the way. In other words; this cloud of Vic Morrow's accidental movie feels like Halloween. (***1 /2) decapitation during filming hanging over it. The two kids in the kitchen had NEAR DARK Forget _those drug also been killed by the helicopter addled Corey kids. Director Kathryn crash., Steven Spielberg's Kick The Bigelow (Strange Days) brings us the Can episode overdoses on cuteness real Lost Boys with the story of a cow and bad child actors. The film kicks boy {Adrien Pasdar) who gets bitten by into gear, though, with Joe Dante's a mystery vamp (Jenny Wright). Soon, masterpiece It's A Good Life, ·about a he joins her gang of outlaw vampfres boy who can have anything he wants. who love to reminisce about their days He likes to have televisions in every in the Civil War. A brilliant vampire film corner, -potato chips and ice cream for the paper Page 13 October 30, 2000 Bedazzled: Brandau Fraser doing what he does best -Entertaining By Collin Souter sider (in this case Elliot, played by Staff Writer Brendan Fraser) who wants to win the heart of a woman he works with. The (**") Devil (this time played by a female, I had seven wishes going into Elizabeth Hurley) hears his wish, and Bedazzled and they hold true for most grants him seven wishes in exchange comedies. Harold Rlfmis' re-make of for his soul. The guy keeps making the classic Dudley Moore/ Peter Cook wishes for a perfect life and the Devil film of the same name granted some consistently takes advantage of the wishes then proceeded to take advan loopholes, thus ruining the poor bas tage of my loopholes on others. The tard's chance at eternal happiness. Devil herself would have done the When you think about it, same thing. The wishes go as follows: Bedazzled seems like an obvious 1. I wish they would stop doing choice for a remake. The Faustian leg re-makes of great movies. Instead, end holds up no matter what time or why not re-make mediocre ones? I place you tell it. While my wish for a love the original Bedazzled. It has ban on re-makes has not been grant become a cult favorite over the past ed, Ramis took advantage of my loop couple decades, and with good rea hole with an entertaining movie son. It has a satiric storyline, British nonetheless. humor, nuns on trampolines, and its 2. I wish women would get jucl aforementioned two leads. Both films er roles In comedies. Elizabeth tell the story of a nebbish, nerdish out- by Peter Cook. This casting choice speaking drug-lord with a phony mus bothered me from the get-go, but tache. If Fraser keeps up with perfor Hurley doesn't set out to re-do Cook's mances such as these, he may have a performance. She finds her own tone bright future in comedy after all. · and character, and it results in an 5. I wish there could be more assured confident performance, even if Inventiveness In comedies. Too she does evoke memories of Kelly many comedies feel fear of taking a LaBreck in Weird Science. So, the different approach to the way they wish in this case has been granted, the establish their theme. Here, Ramis loophole being that we have to lose the and his team come up with what has to biting wit of Peter Cook. be the most inventive opening credits 3. I wish for more "heart" in sequence of the year. It illustrates that American comedies. Well, why not? we all lie, we all cheat and we all leave Sure, I like a good dark, edgy comedy, the seat up in the bathroom. The film but I also like a positive message also comes up with its own scenarios about life. In the original, Dudley rather than just duplicate the original's. Moore's character realized he wanted One hilarious moment occurs when to try and get the girl on his own rather Elliot wishes to be President of the than resort to the Devil again. His life United States. The loophole: He did didn't seem so bad after the hell the n't,say which president. Devil put him through. Here, the mes 6. I wish there could be less ~ackV\iards qr", forwar Pay it the people of Las Vegas that they all expect any complications, In this cont'd. from pg.15 turn up at his doorstep to the tune ·of world, a111L.A. journalist thinks the "Pay "Calling All Angels," the result of which it forward" movement will be hot news. fear of repeating the other Helen Hunt brings to mind the ·final shot of J!'ield Of All cynicism aside, I do believe OCD comedy As Gopd As It Gets per Dreams and the classic 1970's Coca we need films with positive and uplift Businesses: haps?). They just see!ll to exist for the Cola commercial. _ ing messages such as this, that one sake of drama. - ln.this world, alcoholics suddenly ·person can make a difference and it The movie received its biggest decide they won't drink anymore, and has always been up to·us to remember ·Are College Students laugh from the audience when Simon that will be that. The recovery process that and put that message in action. 1· LeBon came in to play the part of does not exist in this world, and rela- . like a non-cynical movie to come Osment's estranged father. I have to tionships always have a funny way of around and express that. But, when • say, I know that this guy, Corey Hart, your· target audience? · working out. the movie just stops toward the end ' . has been trying to make it as a legit In this world, heroin addicts and decides it can't trust its audience actor, but it · doesn't work. The audi decide they don't want to shoot up to receive its message unless it resorts ence knows Daryl Hall just walked on again as soon as they see a beautiful to sentimental terrorist attacks, the scre_en and they can't take it seriously. woman about to jump off a bridge. message loses its meaning and power. Advertising Works! I know I couldn't. Poor Adrian Zmed.* They react with warmth and kindness By the end of this movie, I have Anyway, all of this could have led at the sight. They forget all about get no desire to change the real world. I to a passable two star movie, but it ting hooched up on whack. would just like to show the writers of Call us today for makes a drastically hokey wrong turn In this world, a boozed up old this movie what it would be like if they in the last 10 minutes. I'll try not to Grandma (Angie Dickenson, who lived in it for one day. And then they more information on give too much away here. You have to plays Hur:~t's mother) can be pretty can tell three Hollywood writers, and see it to believe it. Apparently, easy to find. You just have to go where so on, and so on, and so on ... Osment's character's "Pay it forward" the freight trains dock for the night. . *-I'm finding it hard to come to grips placing your own ac! in scheme (He thought of it, just so you You can also take them home during with the fact that I sat through a film know) has such a profound affect on their moment of sobriety and not featuring Jon Bon Jovi. the paper Completely • Receptionist • Customer Service Redesigned Data E,ntry • Administrative Assist· just for students! • Clerical 847.925.6460 the paper Page 15 October 30, 2000 - Call Today for Advertising Rates and Deadlines ®~ (] Q®~@JQ®~®® Admin is t rat i v eI 0 ff ice .;w E Assistant Growing [email protected] Help Wanted: Arlington Hts. · environ Part-time outside land mental consulting firm scaping work. 10-20 hrs. assistant to Part time assistant want per week during fall sea •puti ... "1'0/C'U--'·'"' [1 :rae son, possibly winter work. " "'~ek Very· flexible hours. Calli tion, light word hour. 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