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TRULY, TRULY OUTRAGEOUS SINCE 1992 IMAGES COURTESY OF "OUT OF TIME" ART SHOW AT DOWNTOWN CONTEMPORARY GALLERY VOLUME 24 | ISSUE 11 | MARCH 12-18, 2015 | FREE [2] MARCH 12-18 , 2015 WEEKLY ALIBI WEEKLY ALIBI MARCH 12-18 , 2015 [3] CRIB NOTES BY AUGUST MARCH alibi Crib Notes: March 12, 2015 VOLUME 24 | ISSUE 11 | MARCH 12-18 , 2015 1 Students at an Albuquerque high school have decided on a theme for this EDITORIAL MANAGING EDITOR/MUSIC EDITOR: year’s prom. It’s all about _______________. Samantha Anne Carrillo (ext. 243) [email protected] a) The glory of high school sports FILM EDITOR: b) Marijuana legalization Devin D. O’Leary (ext. 230) [email protected] FOOD EDITOR/FEATURES EDITOR : c) Communism Ty Bannerman (ext. 260) [email protected] d) Obeying one’s parents and becoming ARTS & LIT EDITOR/ WEB EDITOR : Lisa Barrow (ext. 267) [email protected] a cog in America’s corporate CALENDARS EDITOR/COPY EDITOR: machinery Mark Lopez (ext. 239) [email protected] CONTRIBUTING WRITERS: Cecil Adams, Steven Robert Allen, Captain America, Last week, a Duke City woman was Gustavo Arellano, Rob Brezsny, Shawna Brown, 2 Suzanne Buck, Eric Castillo, David Correia, Mark charged with aggravated assault after Fischer, Erik Gamlem, Gail Guengerich, Nora Hickey, she attacked _________________. Kristi D. Lawrence, Ari LeVaux, Mark Lopez, August March, Genevieve Mueller, Amelia Olson, Geoffrey a) A pair of repo men trying to Plant, Benjamin Radford, Jeremy Shattuck, Mike Smith, M. Brianna Stallings, M.J. Wilde, Holly von repossess her BMW Winckel b) Two emissaries from the 53rd PRODUCTION dimension ART DIRECTOR: c) The NMSU Aggies basketball team Jesse Schulz (ext. 229) [email protected] PRODUCTION MANAGER : d) A local blogger whose latest entry Archie Archuleta (ext. 240) [email protected] was way too long to read EDITORIAL DESIGNER/ GRAPHIC DESIGNER : Tasha Lujan (ext. 254) [email protected] ILLUSTRATOR/GRAPHIC DESIGNER : 3 A veteran Santa Fe police officer was Robert Maestas (ext.254) [email protected] recently charged with ________________ in STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER: state district court. Eric Williams [email protected] CONTRIBUTING ARTISTS: Ben Adams, Eva Avenue, Cutty Bage, Max Cannon, a) Eating too many donuts Michael Ellis, Adam Hansen, Jodie Herrera, KAZ, b) Sleeping on the job Jack Larson, Tom Nayder, Ryan North c) Harassing motorists SALES d)Time card fraud SALES DIRECTOR: Sarah Bonneau (ext. 235) [email protected] SENIOR DISPLAY ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE: Which Nob Hill restaurant is the latest John Hankinson (ext. 265) [email protected] 4 ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES: to go out of business here in Burque? Valerie Hollingsworth (ext. 263) [email protected] Laura Liccardi (ext. 264) [email protected] a) Cosmo Tapas Dawn Lytle (ext. 258) [email protected] Sasha Perrin (ext. 241) [email protected] b) Martini Grille ADMINISTRATION c) Nu Asia Vegan CONTROLLER: d) Milton’s Molly Lindsay (ext. 257) [email protected] ACCOUNTS RECEIVABLE : Courtney Foster (ext. 233) [email protected] 5 What new food and drink outlet FRONT DESK: recently opened in the Northeast Constance Moss (ext. 221) [email protected] Renee Chavez (ext. 221) [email protected] Heights? EDITOR AND PUBLISHER: Carl Petersen (ext. 228) [email protected] a) Seagull Street SYSTEMS MANAGER: Kyle Silfer (ext. 242) [email protected] b) Garduño’s WEB MONKEY: c) Yesterdave’s John Millington (ext. 238) [email protected] d) Piñon Coffee House OWNERS, PUBLISHERS EMERITI: Christopher Johnson and Daniel Scott CIRCULATION CIRCULATION MANAGER : Geoffrey Plant (ext. 252) [email protected] Answers: INFORMATION 1) C. After an online poll of students, charter school PRINTER: Cottonwood Classical Preparatory School will have The Santa Fe New Mexican a communism-themed prom this year. IN LOVING MEMORY: Doug Albin, Martin Candelaria, Michael Henningsen, 2) A. Cassandra Gore allegedly attacked the men Eric Johnson, Greg Medara, Mina Yamashita INTERNET SERVICE PROVIDER: assigned to reclaim her fancy German automobile. Southwest Cyberport (232-7992) [email protected] She sped away in the car afterwards and faced a NATIONAL ADVERTISING: VMG Advertising (888) 278-9866 judge this past Saturday. www.vmgadvertising.com 3) D. Lieutenant Jason Wagner has worked for the NUCITY PUBLICATIONS, INC. Santa Fe Police Department for more than a 413 Central NW, Albuquerque, New Mexico 87102 BUSINESS HOURS: 10AM–5PM MON–FRI decade. Wagner pled not guilty to four counts of PHONE: (505) 346-0660 FAX: (505) 256-9651 time card fraud. Alibi (ISSN 1088-0496) is published weekly 52 times per year. The content of this issue is Copyright © 2014 by NuCity Publications, Inc., and may not 4) C. The vegan noodle house recently closed its be reprinted in part or in whole without written consent of the publisher. All rights are reserved. One copy of each edition of Alibi is available free to county doors after about a year in business. The site was residents and visitors each week. Anyone caught removing papers in bulk will be prosecuted on theft charges to the fullest extent of the law. Yearly subscription formerly the home of the legendary Martini Grille $100, back issues are $3, Best of Burque is $5. Queries and manuscripts should include a self-addressed stamped envelope; Alibi assumes no and later, Cosmo Tapas. responsibility for unsolicited material. 5) D. Piñon Coffee House, an offshoot of the New Mexico Piñon Coffee Co., specializes in New Association of Alternative Mexican flavors. a Newsmedia [4] MARCH 12-18, 2015 WEEKLY ALIBI unnamed driver around 9pm on Saturday, Feb. 28. During a routine search of the vehicle, a ODDS deputy located a plastic, 16-ounce sour cream container. Despite the fact that the container was clearly labeled “Not Weed,” officers opened D it and found 11.4 grams of marijuana. The man N admitted the drug was his and was cited. A ENDS Dateline: Pennsylvania WEIRD NEWS Better late than never. Authorities in Duncansville say 33-year-old motorist Michael Dateline: Canada Traveny called an insurance company from a Former Toronto Mayor Rob Ford put the tie he crash scene to buy auto insurance and filed a wore when he admitted to smoking crack up for claim the next day. The Altoona Mirror reports auction on eBay. The NFL logo tie was worn by that the Pennsylvania State Attorney General’s Ford during a Nov. 5, 2013 press conference in Office has filed charges against Traveny for which he admitted to smoking crack cocaine insurance fraud. Traveny is accused of crashing while in office. In all, the tie garnered 111 bids. into the back of another car at a red light on The high bidder on the tie took it home for Aug. 21. Investigators claim that Traveny $12,997. Ford, who is now a Toronto city handed his auto insurance card over to the councilor, placed the tie and several other other driver, who noted that the policy was pieces of “memorabilia” on the auction site. expired. Traveny then allegedly used his cell Ford said 10 percent of the proceeds from the phone to call Safe Auto Insurance from the auction will got to Toronto’s Mount Sinai scene of the accident and purchased a new Hospital. policy. Traveny called the company back the next day and told them he had just gotten in an Dateline: Utah accident. The cost of the claim was $3,902.40. Utah’s state senate is considering passing a bill Traveny is free on a $50,000 bond and will face that would allow medical marijuana edibles in felony theft and misdemeanor insurance fraud the state. The DEA evidently thinks that’s a counts as well as felony theft by deception bad idea—for bunny rabbits. Matt Fairbanks, an charges when he goes to court on March 17. agent with the Drug Enforcement Administration’s “marijuana eradication” team, Dateline: New Jersey testified in front of a state panel late last month. A New Jersey appellate court has ruled that a Among the reasons Fairbanks laid out for man cannot sue for damages after burning his banning medical marijuana is that rabbits could head while praying over a sizzling steak fajita get addicted to pot, causing them to lose their skillet at a Burlington County Applebee’s. natural instincts and sit around all day Hiram Jimenez filed suit against the casual munching marijuana. According to the dining restaurant, claiming a waitress did not Washington Post , Fairbanks claimed that pot warn him that the “sizzling steak fajita skillet” farms could have negative environmental was hot. Jimenez says he bowed his head to pray consequences, and said he’d seen weed-addicted over the food and felt a “burning sensation” in bunnies at illegal grow sites. “I deal in facts. I his left eye and on his face. The man says he deal in science,” Fairbanks told the panel. As then panicked and knocked the food onto his Washington Post reporter Christopher Ingraham lap, causing further damage. None of the burns points out in his article, however, “I don’t know left scars, however. The incident occurred in that the occasional high rabbit constitutes March 2010 at an Applebee’s restaurant in grounds for keeping marijuana prohibition in Westampton. A lower court dismissed the place, any more than drunk squirrels are an lawsuit, saying the sizzling skillet posed an argument for outlawing alcohol. And don’t “open and obvious” danger. Nonetheless, even get me started on the nationwide Jimenez appealed. Earlier this month the epidemic of catnip abuse.” appellate court upheld the lower court’s decision. In their ruling the appellate judges Dateline: Nebraska noted that Jimenez himself described the On the other hand, no one’s arguing that sizzling skillet as “real hot” and visibly smoking. marijuana makes its users geniuses. According Therefore, they said, the danger was self- to the Lincoln Journal Star , a 21-year-old evident.
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