The Peasant Story of Napoleon

THE PEASANT STORY OF NAPOLEON BY HONORE DE BALZAC Goguelet, an old soldier who fought under respected his head. I had proof of that—I Napoleon, tells the story of his wonderful Gen- myself—at Eylau. I see him now, as he rode eral and Emperor to a group of eager listeners up a height, took his field-glass, looked at the in the country doctor’s barn. battle, and said, ‘All goes well.’ One of those plumed busybodies, who plagued him con- You see, my friends, Napoleon was born siderably and followed him everywhere, even in Corsica, a French island, warmed by the to his meals, so they said, thought to play the sun of Italy, where it is like a furnace, and wag, and took the Emperor’s place as he rode where the people kill each other, from fa- away. Ho! In a twinkling, head and plume ther to son, all about nothing: that’s a way were off! You must understand that Napo- they have. To begin with the marvel of the leon had promised to keep the secret of his thing—his mother, who was the handsomest compact all to himself. That’s why all those woman of her time, and a knowing one, be- who followed him, even his nearest friends, thought herself of dedicating him to God, so fell like nuts—Duroc, Bessires, Lannes—all that he might escape the dangers of his child- strong as steel bars, though he could bend hood and future life; for she had dreamed them as he pleased. Besides—to prove he that the world was set on fire the day he was was the child of God, and made to be the born. And, indeed, it was a prophecy! So she father of soldiers—was he ever known to be asked God to protect him, on condition that lieutenant or captain? No, no; commander- Napoleon should restore His holy religion, in-chief from the start. He didn’t look to be which was then cast to the ground. Well, more than twenty-four years of age when he that was agreed upon, and we shall see what was an old general at the taking of Toulon, came of it. where he first began to show the others that “Follow me closely, and tell me if what they knew nothing about manoeuvring can- you hear is in the nature of man. non. “Sure and certain it is that none but “After that, down came our slip of a a man who conceived the idea of making a general to command the grand army of Italy, compact with God could have passed unhurt which hadn’t bread, nor munitions, nor through the enemy’s lines, through can- shoes, nor coats—a poor army, as naked as non-balls, and discharges of grape-shot that a worm. ‘My friends,’ said he, ‘here we are swept the rest of us off like flies, and always together. Get it into your pates that fifteen — — Created for Lit2Go on the web at fcit.usf.edu The Peasant Story of Napoleon by Honore de Balzac days from now you will be conquerors—new Now here’s the end of it. In Ventose, ‘96—in clothes, good gaiters, famous shoes, and every those times that was the month of March man with a great-coat; but, my children, to of to-day—we lay cuddled in a corner of get these things you must march to Milan, Savoie with the marmots; and yet, before that where they are.’ And we marched. France, campaign was over, we were masters of Italy, crushed as flat as a bed-bug, straightened up. just as Napoleon had predicted; and by the We were thirty thousand bare-feet against following March—in a single year and two eighty thousand Austrian bullies, all fine campaigns—he had brought us within sight men, well set-up. I see ‘em now! But Napo- of Vienna. ‘Twas a clean sweep. We devoured leon—he was then only Bonaparte—he knew their armies, one after the other, and made how to put the courage into us! We marched an end of four Austrian generals. One old fel- by night, and we marched by day; we slapped low, with white hair, was roasted like a rat in their faces at Montenotte, we thrashed them the straw at Mantua. Kings begged for mercy at Rivoli, Lodi, Arcole, Millesimo, and we on their knees! Peace was won. never let ‘em up. A soldier gets the taste of “Could a man have done that? No; God conquest. So Napoleon whirled round those helped him, to a certainty! Austrian generals, who didn’t know where to “He divided himself up like the loaves poke themselves to get out of his way, and in the Gospel, commanded the battle by day, he pelted ‘em well—nipped off ten thousand planned it by night; going and coming, for men at a blow sometimes, by getting round the sentinels saw him—never eating, never them with fifteen hundred Frenchmen, and sleeping. So, seeing these prodigies, the sol- then he gleaned as he pleased. He took their diers adopted him for their father. Forward, cannon, their supplies, their money, their march! Then those others, the rulers in Paris, munitions, in short, all they had that was seeing this, said to themselves: ‘Here’s a bold good to take. He fought them and beat them one that seems to get his orders from the on the mountains, he drove them into the skies; he’s likely to put his paw on France. We rivers and seas, he bit ‘em in the air, he de- must let him loose on Asia; we will send him voured ‘em on the ground, and he lashed ‘em to America, perhaps that will satisfy him.’ everywhere. Hey! The grand army feathered But ‘t was written above for him, as it was for itself well; for, d’ye see the Emperor, who Jesus Christ. The command went forth that was a wit, called up the inhabitants and told he should go to Egypt. See, again, his resem- them he was there to deliver them. So after blance to the Son of God. But that’s not all. that the natives lodged and cherished us; the He called together his best veterans, his fire- women too, and very judicious they were. eaters, the ones he had particularly put the — — Created for Lit2Go on the web at fcit.usf.edu The Peasant Story of Napoleon by Honore de Balzac devil into, and he said to them like this: ‘My are not to touch anything at first, for it is all friends, they have given us Egypt to chew going to be yours soon. Forward, march!’ So up, just to keep us busy, but we’ll swallow it far, so good. But all those people of Africa, whole in a couple of campaigns, as we did to whom Napoleon was foretold under the Italy. The common soldiers shall be princes name of Kébir-Bonaberdis—a word of their and have the land for their own. Forward, lingo that means ‘the sultan fires’—were march!’ ‘Forward, march!’ cried the sergeants, afraid as the devil of him. So the Grand Turk, and there we were at Toulon, road to Egypt. and Asia, and Africa had recourse to magic. At that time the English had all their ships in They sent us a demon, named the Mahdi, the sea; but when we embarked, Napoleon supposed to have descended from heaven said: ‘They won’t see us. It is just as well that on a white horse, which, like its master, was you should know from this time forth that bullet-proof; and both of them lived on air, your general has got his star in the sky, which without food to support them. There are guides and protects us.’ What was said was some that say they saw them; but I can’t give done. Passing over the sea, we took Malta like you any reasons to make you certain about an orange, just to quench his thirst for vic- that. The rulers of Arabia and the Mamelukes tory; for he was a man who couldn’t live and tried to make their troopers believe that the do nothing. Mahdi could keep them from perishing in “So here we are in Egypt. Good. Once battle; and they pretended he was an angel here, other orders. The Egyptians, d’ye see, sent from heaven to fight Napoleon and get are men who, ever since the earth was, have back Solomon’s seal. Solomon’s seal was part had giants for sovereigns, and armies as of their paraphernalia which they vowed our numerous as ants; for, you must understand, general had stolen. You must understand that that’s the land of genii and crocodiles, where we’d given ‘em a good many wry faces, in they’ve built pyramids as big as our moun- spite of what he had said to us. tains, and buried their kings under them to “Now, tell me how they knew that Na- keep them fresh—an idea that pleased ‘em poleon had a pact with God? Was that natu- mightily. So then, after we disembarked, the ral, d’ye think? Little Corporal said to us: ‘My children, the “They held to it in their minds that Na- country you are going to conquer has a lot of poleon commanded the genii, and could pass gods that you must respect; because French- hither and thither in the twinkling of an eye, men ought to be friends with everybody, like a bird.

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