A Midsummer Night’s Dreamby William Shakespeare ​ ACT I, SCENE I. SETTING: Athens. The palace of THESEUS.

Characters: • Demetrius (small role) • Egeus (medium role) • Helena (large role)

• Hermia (large role) • Hippolyta (small role) • Lysander (large role)

• Theseus (large role)

Enter THESEUS, HIPPOLYTA, THESEUS, HIPPOLYTA, PHILOSTRATE, and PHILOSTRATE, and Attendants Attendantsenter.

THESEUS THESEUS Now, fair Hippolyta, our nuptial hour Our wedding day is almost here, my beautiful Draws on apace; four happy days bring in Hippolyta. We’ll be getting married in four days, Another moon: but, O, methinks, how slow on the day of the new moon. But it seems to me This old moon wanes! that the days are passing too slowly.

HIPPOLYTA HIPPOLYTA Four days will quickly steep themselves in No, you’ll see, four days will quickly turn into night; four nights. And since we dream at night, time Four nights will quickly dream away the time. passes quickly then.

THESEUS THESEUS Hippolyta, I wooed thee with my sword, Hippolyta, I wooed you with violence, using my And won thy love, doing thee injuries; sword, and got you to fall in love with me by But I will wed thee in another key, injuring you. But I’ll marry you under different With pomp, with triumph and with revelling. circumstances—with extravagant festivals, public festivities, and celebration.

Enter EGEUS, HERMIA, LYSANDER, and EGEUS enters with his daughter HERMIA, DEMETRIUS. and LYSANDER and DEMETRIUS. ​

EGEUS EGEUS Happy be Theseus, our renowned duke! Long live Theseus, our famous an respected duke!

THESEUS THESEUS Thanks, good Egeus: what's the news with Thanks, good Egeus. What’s new with you? thee?

EGEUS EGEUS Full of vexation come I, with complaint I’m here, full of anger, to complain about my Against my child, my daughter Hermia. daughter Hermia.—Step forward, Stand forth, Demetrius. My noble lord, Demetrius.—My lord, this man, Demetrius, has This man hath my consent to marry her. my permission to marry her.—Step forward, Stand forth, Lysander: and my gracious duke, Lysander.—But this other man, Lysander, has This man hath bewitched my child; cast a magic spell over my child’s heart.—You, Thou, thou, Lysander, you, Lysander, you’ve connived to steal my With cunning hast thou filched my daughter's daughter’s heart, making her stubborn and heart, harsh instead of obedient (like she should Turned her obedience, which is due to me, be).—And, my gracious duke, if she won’t agree To stubborn harshness: and, my gracious duke, to marry Demetrius right now, I ask you to let Be it so she; will not here before your grace me exercise the right that all fathers have in Consent to marry with Demetrius, Athens. Since she belongs to me, I can do what I beg the ancient privilege of Athens, I want with her—I can either make her marry As she is mine, I may dispose of her: Demetrius—or have her killed. Which shall be either to this gentleman Or to her death.

THESEUS THESEUS What say you, Hermia? be advised fair maid: What do you have to say for yourself, Hermia? To you your father should be as a god. Think carefully, pretty girl. You should think of Demetrius is a worthy gentleman. your father as a god. Demetrius is an admirable man.

HERMIA HERMIA So is Lysander. So is Lysander.

THESEUS THESEUS In himself he is; You’re right, Lysander’s admirable too. But since But in this kind, wanting your father's voice, your father doesn’t want him to marry you, you The other must be held the worthier. have to consider Demetrius to be the better man.

HERMIA HERMIA I would my father looked but with my eyes. I wish my father could see them with my eyes.

THESEUS THESEUS Rather your eyes must with his judgment look. No, you must see them as your father sees them.

HERMIA HERMIA I do entreat your grace to pardon me. Your grace, please forgive me. I don’t know I know not by what power I am made bold, what makes me think I can say this, and I don’t Nor how it may concern my modesty, know if speaking my mind to such a powerful In such a presence here to plead my thoughts; and noble person as yourself will damage my But I beseech your grace that I may know reputation for modesty. But please, tell me the The worst that may befall me in this case, worst thing that could happen to me if I refuse If I refuse to wed Demetrius. to marry Demetrius.

THESEUS THESEUS Either to die the death or to abjure You’ll either be executed or you’ll never see Forever the society of men. another man again. So think carefully about Therefore, fair Hermia, question your desires; what you want, beautiful Hermia. Consider how Know of your youth, examine well your blood, young you are, and question your feelings. Then Whether, if you yield not to your father's choice, decide whether you could stand to be a nun, You can endure the livery of a nun, wearing a priestess’s habit and caged up in a For aye to be in shady cloister, cloister forever, living your entire life without a To live a barren sister all your life. husband or children.

HERMIA HERMIA So will I grow, so live, so die, my lord, I’d rather wither away than give up my virginity Ere I will my virgin patent up to someone I don’t love. Unto his lordship, whose unwished yoke My soul consents not to give sovereignty.

THESEUS THESEUS Take time to pause; and, by the next new Take some time to think about this. By the time moon-- of the next new moon—the day when Hippolyta The sealing-day betwixt my love and me, and I will be married—be ready either to be For everlasting bond of fellowship-- executed for disobeying your father, to marry Upon that day either prepare to die Demetrius as your father wishes, or to take a For disobedience to your father's will, vow to spend the rest of your life as a virgin. Or else to wed Demetrius, as he would; Or to protest For aye austerity and single life.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Relent, sweet Hermia: and, Lysander, yield Please give in, sweet Hermia.—And Lysander, Thy crazed title to my certain right. stop acting like she’s yours. I’ve got more of a right to her than you do.

LYSANDER LYSANDER You have her father's love, Demetrius; Her father loves you, Demetrius. So why don’t Let me have Hermia's: do you marry him. you marry him and let me have Hermia?

EGEUS EGEUS Scornful Lysander! true, he hath my love, It’s true, rude Lysander, I do love him. That’s And what is mine my love shall render him. why I’m giving him my daughter. She’s mine, And she is mine, and all my right of her and I’m giving her to Demetrius. I do estate unto Demetrius.

LYSANDER LYSANDER I am, my lord, as well derived as he, (to THESEUS) My lord, I’m just as noble and rich as ​ ​ ​ As well possessed; my love is more than his; he is. I love Hermia more than he does. My My fortunes every way as fairly ranked, prospects are as good as his, if not better. And If not with vantage, as Demetrius'; beautiful Hermia loves me—which is more And, which is more than all these boasts can important than all those other things I’m bragging be, about. Why shouldn’t I be able to marry her? I am beloved of beauteous Hermia: Demetrius—and I’ll say this to his face—courted Why should not I then prosecute my right? Helena, and made her fall in love with him. That Demetrius, I'll avouch it to his head, sweet lady, Helena, loves devoutly. She adores this Made love to Helena, horrible and unfaithful man. And won her soul; and she, sweet lady, dotes, Devoutly dotes, dotes in idolatry, Upon this spotted and inconstant man.

THESEUS THESEUS I must confess that I have heard so much, I have to admit I’ve heard something about that, And with Demetrius thought to have spoke and meant to ask Demetrius about it, but I was too thereof; busy with personal matters and it slipped my But, being over-full of self-affairs, mind.—Anyway, Demetrius and Egeus, both of you, My mind did lose it. But, Demetrius, come; come with me. I want to say a few things to you in And come, Egeus; you shall go with me, private.—As for you, beautiful Hermia, get ready to I have some private schooling for you both. do what your father wants, because otherwise the For you, fair Hermia, look you arm yourself law says that you must die or become a nun, and To fit your fancies to your father's will; there’s nothing I can do about that.— Or else the law of Athens yields you up-- To death, or to a vow of single life.

Exeunt all but LYSANDER and HERMIA. They all exit except LYSANDER and HERMIA.

LYSANDER LYSANDER How now, my love! why is your cheek so What’s going on, my love? Why are you so pale? pale? Why have your rosy cheeks faded so quickly? How chance the roses there do fade so fast?

HERMIA HERMIA Belike for want of rain, which I could well Probably because my cheeks' roses needed rain, Beteem them from the tempest of my eyes. which I could easily give them with all the tears in my eyes.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Ay me! The course of true love never did run Oh, honey! True love always faces obstacles. smooth.

HERMIA HERMIA If then true lovers have been ever crossed, If true lovers are always thwarted, then let’s try to Then let us teach our trial patience. be patient as we deal with our problem.

LYSANDER LYSANDER A good persuasion: therefore, hear me, That’s the right attitude. So, listen, Hermia. I Hermia. have an aunt who is a widow, who’s very rich I have a widow aunt, a dowager and doesn’t have any children. She lives about Of great revenue, and she hath no child: twenty miles from Athens, and she thinks of me From Athens is her house remote seven as a son. I could marry you there, gentle leagues; Hermia, where the strict laws of Athens can’t And she respects me as her only son. touch us. So here’s the plan. If you love me, There, gentle Hermia, may I marry thee; sneak out of your father’s house tomorrow night And to that place the sharp Athenian law and meet me in the forest. I’ll wait for you there. Cannot pursue us. If thou lovest me then, Steal forth thy father's house to-morrow night; And in the wood, there will I stay for thee.

HERMIA HERMIA My good Lysander! Oh, Lysander, I swear I’ll be there tomorrow. I I swear to thee, by Cupid's strongest bow, swear by Cupid’s strongest bow, I give you my To-morrow truly will I meet with thee. word, I will meet you at that spot tomorrow.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Keep promise, love. Look, here comes Helena. Keep your promise, my love. Look, here comes Helena.

Enter HELENA. HELENA enters. ​ ​ ​

HERMIA HERMIA God speed fair Helena! whither away? Hello, beautiful Helena! Where are you going?

HELENA HELENA Call you me fair? that fair again unsay. Did you just call me “beautiful”? Take it back. Demetrius loves your fair: O happy fair! You’re the beautiful one as far as Demetrius is Your eyes are stars; and your tongue's sweet concerned. Oh, you’re so lucky! Your eyes are air like stars, and your voice is more musical. More tuneable. Sickness is contagious—I wish beauty were Sickness is catching: O, were favour so, contagious too! I would catch your good looks Yours would I catch, fair Hermia, ere I go; before I left. My ear would be infected by your My ear should catch your voice, my eye your voice, my eye by your eye, and my tongue eye, would come down with a bad case of your My tongue should catch your tongue's sweet melodious speech. If the world were mine, I’d melody. give it all up—everything except Demetrius—to Were the world mine, Demetrius being bated, be you. Oh, teach me how you look the way you The rest I'd give to be to you translated. do, and which tricks you used to make O, teach me how you look, and with what art Demetrius fall in love with you. You sway the motion of Demetrius' heart.

HERMIA HERMIA I frown upon him, yet he loves me still. I frown at him, but he still loves me.

HELENA HELENA O that your frowns would teach my smiles such Oh, if only my smiles could inspire love as skill! effectively as your frowns!

HERMIA HERMIA I give him curses, yet he gives me love. I curse him, but he loves me.

HELENA HELENA O that my prayers could such affection move! If only my prayers could inspire that kind of affection!

HERMIA HERMIA The more I hate, the more he follows me. The more I hate him, the more he follows me around.

HELENA HELENA The more I love, the more he hateth me. The more I love him, the more he hates me.

HERMIA HERMIA His folly, Helena, is no fault of mine. It’s not my fault he acts like that, Helena.

HELENA HELENA None, but your beauty: would that fault were That’s true, it’s your beauty’s fault. I wish I had mine! a fault like that!

HERMIA HERMIA Take comfort: he no more shall see my face; Don’t worry. He won’t see my face ever again. Lysander and myself will fly this place. Lysander and I are running away from here.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Helen, to you our minds we will unfold: Helena, we’ll tell you about our secret plan. Tomorrow night,through Athens' gates have we Tomorrow night, we plan to sneak out of Athens. devised to steal.

HERMIA HERMIA And in the wood, there my Lysander and myself (to HELENA) In the woods—that’s where ​ ​ ​ shall meet; Lysander and I will meet. From then on we’ll And thence from Athens turn away our eyes, turn our backs on Athens. We’ll look for new To seek new friends and stranger companies. friends and keep the company of strangers. Farewell, sweet playfellow: pray thou for us; Goodbye, old friend. Pray for us, and I hope you And good luck grant thee thy Demetrius! win over Demetrius!—Keep your promise, Keep word, Lysander: we must starve our sight Lysander. We need to stay away from each other From lovers' food till morrow deep midnight. until midnight tomorrow.

LYSANDER LYSANDER I will, my Hermia. I will, my Hermia.

Exit HERMIA HERMIA exits. ​ ​

LYSANDER LYSANDER Helena, adieu: Goodbye, Helena. I hope Demetrius comes to As you on him, Demetrius dote on you! love you as much as you love him!

Exit LYSANDER exits. ​ ​

HELENA HELENA How happy some o'er other some can be! It’s amazing how much happier some people are Through Athens I am thought as fair as she. than others! People throughout Athens think I’m But what of that? Demetrius thinks not so; as beautiful as Hermia. But so what? Demetrius Love looks not with the eyes, but with the doesn’t think so, and that’s all that matters. mind. When we’re in love, we don’t see with our eyes For ere Demetrius looked on Hermia's eyes, but with our minds. Before Demetrius ever saw He hailed down oaths that he was only mine; Hermia, he showered me with promises and And when this hail some heat from Hermia felt, swore he’d be mine forever. But when he got all So he dissolved, and showers of oaths did melt. hot and bothered over Hermia, his promises I will go tell him of fair Hermia's flight: melted away. I’ll go tell Demetrius that Hermia is Then to the wood will he tomorrow night running away tomorrow night. He’ll run after Pursue her; and for this intelligence her. If he’s grateful to me for this information, If I have thanks, it is a dear expense: it’ll be worth my pain in helping him pursue my But herein mean I to enrich my pain, rival Hermia. At least I’ll get to see him when he To have his sight thither and back again. goes, and then again when he comes back.

Exit HELENA exits.

A Midsummer Night’s Dreamby William Shakespeare ​ ACT II, SCENE I. SETTING: A wood near Athens.

CHARACTERS:

• Demetrius (medium role) • Fairy (small role) • Helena (medium role)

• Oberon (large role) • Puck (large role) • Titania (medium role)

Enter, from opposite sides, a Fairy, and A FAIRY and ROBINGOODFELLOW (a “puck” or PUCK mischievous spirit) meet onstage.

PUCK PUCK The king doth keep his revels here to-night: The king’s having a party here tonight. Just make Take heed the queen come not within his sure the queen doesn’t come anywhere near him, sight; because King Oberon is extremely angry. He’s For Oberon is passing fell and wrath, furious because she stole an adorable boy from an Because that she as her attendant hath Indian king. She’s never kidnapped such a darling A lovely boy, stolen from an Indian king; human child before, and Oberon’s jealous. He wants She never had so sweet a changeling; the child for himself, to accompany him on his And jealous Oberon would have the child wanderings through the wild forests. But the queen Knight of his train, to trace the forests wild; refuses to hand the boy over to Oberon. But she perforce withholds the loved boy.

Fairy FAIRY Either I mistake your shape and making Unless I’m mistaken, you’re that mischievous and quite, naughty spirit named Robin Goodfellow. Some Or else you are that shrewd and knavish people call you “Hobgoblin” and “sweet Puck,” and sprite you’re nice to them. You do their work for them and Call'd Robin Goodfellow? give them good luck. That’s you, right? Those that Hobgoblin call you and sweet Puck, You do their work, and they shall have good luck: Are not you he?

PUCK PUCK Thou speak'st aright; What you say is true. That’s me you’re talking I am that merry wanderer of the night. about, the playful wanderer of the night. I tell jokes I jest to Oberon and make him smile. to Oberon and make him smile. But step aside, fairy! But, room, fairy! here comes Oberon. Here comes Oberon.

Fairy FAIRY And here my mistress. Would that he were And here’s my mistress, Titania. I wish he’d go gone! away!

Enter, from one side, OBERON, with his OBERON, the Fairy King, and his followers train; from the other, TITANIA, with enter. On the opposite side of the stage, hers TITANIA, the Fairy Queen, and her followers enter.

OBERON OBERON Ill met by moonlight, proud Titania. How not nice to see you, Titania. ​ ​

TITANIA TITANIA What, jealous Oberon! Fairies, skip hence: What, are you jealous, Oberon?—Fairies, let’s get I have forsworn his bed and company. out of here. I’ve sworn I’ll never sleep with him or talk to him again.

OBERON OBERON Tarry, rash wanton: am not I thy lord? Wait just a minute, you brazen hussy. Aren’t you supposed to obey me, your lord and husband?

TITANIA TITANIA Then I must be thy lady: but I know If you’re my lord and husband, I must be your lady Why thou art here. and wife, so you’re supposed to be faithful to me. Forsooth, the bouncing Amazon, But I know. why you are here. That Amazon Your mistress and your warrior love, Hippolyta, your mistress and your warrior lover, is To Theseus must be wedded, and you come getting married to Theseus, and you’ve come to To give their bed joy and prosperity. celebrate their marriage.

OBERON OBERON How canst thou thus for shame, Titania, How can you stand there shamelessly talking about Glance at my credit with Hippolyta, me and Hippolyta, when you know that I know about Knowing I know thy love to Theseus? your love for Theseus?

TITANIA TITANIA These are the forgeries of jealousy. These are nothing but jealous lies.

OBERON OBERON Do you amend it then; it lies in you: Do something about it, then. You have the power to Why should Titania cross her Oberon? fix it. Why would Titania want to argue with her I do but beg a little changeling boy, Oberon? All I’m asking for is to have that little To be my henchman. human boy as part of my crew.

TITANIA TITANIA Set your heart at rest: Get over it. I won’t give up this child for all of The fairy land buys not the child of me. Fairyland. His mother was one of my worshippers. His mother was a votaress of my order. But since she was a mortal, she died giving birth to But she, being mortal, of that boy did die; that boy, and for her sake I’m raising him and will And for her sake do I rear up her boy, not give him up. And for her sake I will not part with him.

OBERON OBERON How long within this wood intend you stay? How long do you plan to stay here in this forest? TITANIA TITANIA Perchance till after Theseus' wedding-day. Maybe until after Theseus’s wedding day. If you If you will patiently dance in our round behave yourself and join us in our circle dance and And see our moonlight revels, go with us; moonlight celebrations, then you can come with us. If not, shun me, and I will spare your If not, leave me alone, and I’ll stay away from your haunts. turf.

OBERON OBERON Give me that boy, and I will go with thee. Give me that boy and I’ll come with you.

TITANIA TITANIA Not for thy fairy kingdom. Fairies, away! Not for your entire fairy kingdom.—Come, fairies, We shall chide downright, if I longer stay. let’s go. We’re going to have an out-and-out brawl if I stay any longer.

Exit TITANIA with her train. TITANIA and her FAIRIES exit. ​ ​

OBERON OBERON Well, go thy way: thou shalt not from this Well, go on your way, then. You won’t leave this grove grove until I’ve paid you back for this insult. (to ​ Till I torment thee for this injury. GOODFELLOW) My dear Puck, come here. You ​ ​ My gentle Puck, come hither. Thou remember the time when I saw—but you could remembers not—Cupid flying, with all of his arrows ready. He That very time I saw, but thou could not, took aim and he shot his arrow of love. I paid Cupid all armed: a certain aim he took attention to where Cupid’s arrow fell. It fell on a And loosed his love-shaft smartly from his little western flower. Bring me that flower. I showed bow, it to you once. If its juice is put on someone’s Marked I where the bolt of Cupid fell: eyelids while they’re asleep, that person will fall in It fell upon a little western flower. love with the next living creature he or she sees. Fetch me that flower; the herb I showed Bring me this plant, and get back here. thee once: The juice of it on sleeping eye-lids laid Will make or man or woman madly dote Upon the next live creature that it sees. Fetch me this herb; and be thou here again.

PUCK PUCK I'll round about the earth in forty minutes. I could go around the world in forty minutes.

Exit. Exits. ​

OBERON OBERON Having once this juice, When I have the juice of that flower, I’ll trickle some I'll watch Titania when she is asleep, drops of it on Titania’s eyes while she’s sleeping. And drop the liquor of it in her eyes. She’ll fall madly in love with the first thing she sees The next thing then she waking looks upon, when she wakes up—even if it’s a lion, a bear, a Be it on lion, bear, or wolf, or bull, wolf, a bull, a monkey, or an ape. And before I make On meddling monkey, or on busy ape, her normal again—I can cure her by treating her She shall pursue it with the soul of love: with another plant—I’ll make her give me that little And ere I take this charm from off her boy as my page. But who’s that coming this way? I’ll sight, make myself invisible and listen to their As I can take it with another herb, conversation. I'll make her render up her page to me. But who comes here? I am invisible; And I will overhear their conference.

Enter DEMETRIUS, HELENA, following DEMETRIUS enters, followed by HELENA. ​ ​ him.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS I love thee not, therefore pursue me not. Look, I don’t love you, so stop following me around. Where is Lysander and fair Hermia? Where are Lysander and beautiful Hermia? Lysander The one I'll slay, the other slayeth me. I want to stop, but Hermia stops my heart from Thou told me they were stolen unto this beating. You told me they escaped into this forest. wood; And here I am, going crazy in the middle of the And here am I, and wild within this wood, woods because I can’t find my Hermia. Go away, get Because I cannot meet my Hermia. out of here, and stop following me. Hence, get thee gone, and follow me no more.

HELENA HELENA You draw me, you hard-hearted adamant. You attract me to you, you cruel magnet!

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Do I entice you? do I speak you fair? Do I ask you to follow me? Do I speak to you kindly? Or, rather, do I not in plainest truth Don’t I tell you in the clearest terms that I do not Tell you, I do not, nor I cannot love you? and cannot love you?

HELENA HELENA And even for that do I love you the more. Yes, but that makes me love you even more. I’m I am your spaniel; and, Demetrius, your little dog, Demetrius. The more you beat me, The more you beat me, I will fawn on you: the more I’ll love you. Treat me like you would treat Use me but as your spaniel, spurn me, a dog—kick me, hit me, neglect me, try to lose me. strike me, Just let me follow behind you, even though I’m not Neglect me, lose me; only give me leave, good enough for you. Could I ask for a worse place Unworthy as I am, to follow you. in your heart than to be treated as you would treat a What worser place can I beg in your love,-- dog? And yet I would consider it an honor to be your And yet a place of high respect with me,-- dog. Than to be used as you use your dog?

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Tempt not too much the hatred of my Don’t push it. Just looking at you makes me sick. spirit; For I am sick when I do look on thee.

HELENA HELENA And I am sick when I look not on you. And I get sick when I can’t look at you.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS You do impeach your modesty too much, You’re risking your reputation by leaving the city and To leave the city and commit yourself stalking someone who doesn’t love you. Into the hands of one that loves you not.

HELENA HELENA Your virtue is my privilege. I rely on your virtue to protect me.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS I'll run from thee and hide me in the woods, I’ll run away from you and hide in the bushes, and And leave thee to the mercy of wild beasts. leave you to the mercy of wild animals.

HELENA HELENA The wildest hath not such a heart as you. The wildest animal isn’t as cruel as you are.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS I will not stay thy questions; let me go: I’m not sticking around to listen to you any longer. Or, if thou follow me, do not believe Leave me alone. Or if you follow me, you’d better But I shall do thee mischief in the wood. understand that I’ll do something bad to you in the forest.

HELENA HELENA Ay, in the temple, in the town, the field, Yes, you already hurt me in the church, in the town, You do me mischief. Fie, Demetrius! and in the fields. Shame on you, Demetrius! Your Your wrongs do set a scandal on my sex: behavior is an insult to all women. We cannot fight We cannot fight for love, as men may do; for love as men can. We should be pursued and We should be wooed and were not made to courted. We weren’t made to do the pursuing. woo.

Exit DEMETRIUS. DEMETRIUS exits. ​ ​ ​

HELENA HELENA I'll follow thee and make a heaven of hell, I’ll follow you and turn this hell I’m in into a kind of To die upon the hand I love so well. heaven. It would be heavenly to be killed by someone I love so much.

Exit. HELENA exits. ​ ​ ​

OBERON OBERON Fare thee well, nymph: ere he do leave this Goodbye, nymph. Before he leaves this part of the grove, forest, you’ll change places: you’ll be the one Thou shalt fly him and he shall seek thy running away, and he’ll be in love with you. love.

Re-enter PUCK. enters. ​ ​

OBERON OBERON Hast thou the flower there? Welcome, Do you have the flower? Welcome, traveler. wanderer.

PUCK PUCK Ay, there it is. Yes, here it is.

OBERON OBERON I pray thee, give it me. Please, give it to me. (he takes the flower from ) ​ ​ ​ I know a bank where sleeps Titania in the night, I know a place where Titania sleeps sometimes And with the juice of this I'll streak her eyes, at night. I’ll put the juice of this flower on And make her full of hateful fantasies. Titania’s eyes, and fill her with horrible delusions Take thou some of it, and seek through this and desires. (he gives part of the flower) You ​ ​ ​ ​ grove: take some of it too, and look around in this part A sweet Athenian lady is in love of the forest. A sweet Athenian lady is in love With a disdainful youth: anoint his eyes; with a young man who wants nothing to do with But do it when the next thing he espies her. Put some of this flower’s juice on his eyes, May be the lady: thou shalt know the man and make sure to do it in such a way that the By the Athenian garments he hath on. next thing he sees will be the lady. You’ll be Effect it with some care, that he may prove able to tell it’s him because he’s wearing More fond on her than she upon her love. Athenian clothes. Do it carefully, so that he’ll end up loving her more than she loves him. And then make sure to meet me before the rooster’s first crow at dawn.

PUCK PUCK Fear not, my lord, your servant shall do so. Don’t worry, sir. I’m at your service.

Exeunt. They all exit, separately. ​

A Midsummer Night’s Dreamby William Shakespeare ​ ACT II, SCENE II. SETTING: Another part of the wood.

CHARACTERS:

• Demetrius (small role) • Fairy (small role) • Fairy singers (small role)

• Helena (large role) • Hermia (medium role) • Lysander (large role)

• Oberon (medium role) • Puck (medium role) • Titania (large role)

Enter TITANIA, with her train. TITANIA, the Fairy Queen, enters with her ​ fairies.

TITANIA TITANIA Come, now. Sing me now asleep; Come. Sing me to sleep now, and then go off to do Then to your offices and let me rest. your duties and let me rest.

The Fairies sing The Fairies sing

Fairy FAIRY Hence, away! now all is well: Okay, let’s go! Everything’s fine now. One of us will One aloof stand sentinel. stay and stand guard.

Exeunt Fairies. TITANIA sleeps. TITANIA falls asleep. The FAIRIES exit. ​ ​ ​ ​ Enter OBERON and squeezes the OBERON enters and squeezes flower juice on ​ ​ flower on TITANIA's eyelids. TITANIA ’s eyelids. ​ ​

OBERON OBERON What thou seest when thou dost wake, Whatever you see first when you wake up, think of it Do it for thy true-love take, as your true love. Love him and yearn for him, even Love and languish for his sake: if he’s a lynx, a cat, a bear, a leopard, or a wild boar. Be it ounce, or cat, or bear, Whatever’s there when you wake up will be dear to Pard, or boar with bristled hair, you. Wake up when something nasty is nearby. In thy eye that shall appear When thou wakest, it is thy dear: Wake when some vile thing is near.

Exit. OBERON exits. ​ ​ Enter LYSANDER and HERMIA. LYSANDER and HERMIA enter. ​ ​ ​

LYSANDER LYSANDER Fair love, you faint with wandering in the My love, you look like you’re about to faint from wood; wandering in the woods for so long, and to tell you And to speak troth, I have forgot our way: the truth, I’ve gotten us lost. We’ll take a rest, if you We'll rest us, Hermia, if you think it good, think it’s a good idea, and wait until daylight when And tarry for the comfort of the day. things will be easier.

HERMIA HERMIA Be it so, Lysander: find you out a bed; Let’s do that, Lysander. Find something to cushion For I upon this bank will rest my head. you while you sleep. I’m going to rest my head on this little slope.

LYSANDER LYSANDER One turf shall serve as pillow for us both; We can both sleep together on the grass. We’ll have One heart, one bed, two bosoms and one one heart, one bed, two bodies, and one faithful vow. troth.

HERMIA HERMIA Nay, good Lysander; for my sake, my dear, No, Lysander. Please, for my sake, sleep a little Lie further off yet, do not lie so near. farther away. Don’t sleep so close to me.

LYSANDER LYSANDER O, take the sense, sweet, of my innocence! Oh, sweetheart, I didn’t mean anything naughty I mean, that my heart unto yours is knit when I said that. I just meant that our hearts are So that but one heart we can make of it; joined, so we can almost think of them as one heart. Two bosoms interchained with an oath; Our two bodies are linked together by the promises So then two bosoms and a single troth. we’ve made to each other, so there are two bodies Then by your side no bed-room me deny; and one faithful vow. So let me sleep next to you. If I For lying so, Hermia, I do not lie. lie next to you, I won’t lie to you—I’ll be faithful and ​ ​ ​ ​ respect you.

HERMIA HERMIA Lysander riddles very prettily. Lysander’s got a way with words. But please, darling, But, gentle friend, for love and courtesy sleep a little farther away so we can behave properly. Lie further off; in human modesty, It’s only proper for a well-behaved bachelor and a Such separation as may well be said well-behaved girl to be physically separated like this. Becomes a virtuous bachelor and a maid, Stay away for now, and good night, my sweet friend. So far be distant; and, good night, sweet I hope your love for me remains this strong for your friend: entire life! Thy love never alter till thy sweet life end!

LYSANDER LYSANDER Amen, amen, to that fair prayer, say I; Amen to that. I hope my life ends before my loyalty And then end life when I end loyalty! to you does. I’ll sleep over here. Sleep well! Here is my bed: sleep give thee all his rest!

HERMIA HERMIA With half that wish the wisher's eyes be You sleep well too. pressed!

They sleep.Enter PUCK. HERMIA and LYSANDER sleep. enters. ​ ​ ​

PUCK PUCK Through the forest have I gone. I’ve been through the entire forest, but I haven’t But Athenian found I none, found any Athenian man to use the flower on. (He ​ On whose eyes I might approve sees LYSANDER and HERMIA) Wait a second, who’s ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ This flower's force in stirring love. this? He’s wearing Athenian clothes. This must be Night and silence.—Who is here? the guy who rejected the Athenian girl. And here’s Weeds of Athens he doth wear: the girl, sleeping soundly on the damp and dirty This is he, my master said, ground. Pretty girl! She shouldn’t lie near this rude Despised the Athenian maid; and heartless man. (he puts flower juice on ​ And here the maiden, sleeping sound, LYSANDER ’s eyelids) Jerk, I throw all the power of ​ ​ On the dank and dirty ground. this magic charm on your eyes. When you wake up, Pretty soul! she durst not lie let love keep you from going back to sleep. Wake Near this lack-love, this kill-courtesy. up when I’m gone, because now I have to go to Churl, upon thy eyes I throw Oberon. All the power this charm doth owe. When thou wakest, let love forbid Sleep his seat on thy eyelid: So awake when I am gone; For I must now to Oberon.

Exit. exits. ​ Enter DEMETRIUS and HELENA, running. DEMETRIUS and HELENA enter, running. ​ ​ ​

HELENA HELENA Stay, though thou kill me, sweet Demetrius. Stop, Demetrius! Stop, even if only to kill me.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS I charge thee, hence, and do not haunt me I’m telling you, get out of here, and don’t follow me thus. around like this.

HELENA HELENA O, wilt thou darkling leave me? do not so. Oh, will you leave me alone in the dark? Don’t.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Stay, on thy peril: I alone will go. Stay here at your own risk. I’m going on alone.

Exit. DEMETRIUS exits. ​ ​ ​

HELENA HELENA O, I am out of breath in this fond chase! Oh, I’m out of breath from this foolish chase. The The more my prayer, the lesser is my grace. more I pray, the less I get out of it. Hermia is Happy is Hermia, wheresoever she lies; lucky, wherever she is, because she has beautiful For she hath blessed and attractive eyes. eyes. How did her eyes get so bright? Not from How came her eyes so bright? Not with salt crying. If that’s the case, tears wash my eyes tears: more than hers. No, no, I’m as ugly as a bear, If so, my eyes are oftener washed than hers. since animals that see me run away in terror. So No, no, I am as ugly as a bear; it’s no surprise that Demetrius runs away from For beasts that meet me run away for fear: me as if I were a monster. What evil and Therefore no marvel though Demetrius deceitful mirror made me think I could rival Do, as a monster fly my presence thus. Hermia’s starry eyes? (she sees LYSANDER)But ​ ​ ​ ​ What wicked and dissembling glass of mine who’s this here? Lysander, on the ground? Is he Made me compare with Hermia's starry eyes? dead or sleeping? I don’t see any blood or But who is here? Lysander! on the ground! injuries—Lysander, if you’re alive, wake up. Dead? or asleep? I see no blood, no wound. Lysander if you live, good sir, awake.

LYSANDER LYSANDER [Awaking] And run through fire I will for thy (Waking up) I’d even run through fire if you told ​ ​ ​ sweet sake. me to. Radiant, beautiful Helena! Where is Transparent Helena! Demetrius? Oh, I’d kill that name with my sword Where is Demetrius? O, how fit a word if I could! Is that vile name to perish on my sword!

HELENA HELENA Do not say so, Lysander; say not so Don’t say that, Lysander. Don’t say that. Why do What though he love your Hermia? Lord, what you care that he loves Hermia? What does it though? matter? Hermia still loves you, so be happy. Yet Hermia still loves you: then be content.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Content with Hermia! No; I do repent Happy with Hermia? No. I regret all the boring The tedious minutes I with her have spent. time I wasted with her. I don’t love Hermia; I Not Hermia but Helena I love: love Helena. Who wouldn’t love a dove more Who will not change a raven for a dove? than a crow? A man’s desires are influenced by The will of man is by his reason swayed; his logical mind, and it’s simply logical that And reason says you are the worthier maid. you’re more worthy of love than Hermia is.

HELENA HELENA Wherefore was I to this keen mockery born? Why does everyone always make fun of me? When at your hands did I deserve this scorn? What have I done to deserve this kind of treatment from you?

Exit. HELENA exits. ​ ​ ​

LYSANDER LYSANDER She sees not Hermia. Hermia, sleep thou She doesn’t see Hermia—Hermia, keep sleeping, there: and don’t come near me ever again! I’ll use all And never mayst thou come Lysander near! my talents and efforts to serve Helen and bring And, all my powers, address your love and her honor. might To honour Helen and to be her knight!

Exit. LYSANDER exits. ​ ​ ​

HERMIA HERMIA [Awaking] Help me, Lysander, help me! (Waking up) Help me, Lysander, help me! Oh, ​ ​ ​ Ay me, for pity! what a dream was here! my God! What a terrible dream I just had! Lysander, look how I do quake with fear: Lysander, look how I’m shaking from fear. I Methought a serpent eat my heart away, thought a snake was eating my heart while you And you sat smiling at his cruel pray. sat smiling and watching. Lysander!—What, is he Lysander! what, removed? Lysander! lord! gone?—Lysander, my lord!—What, is he out of What, out of hearing? gone? no sound, no earshot? Gone? No answer, nothing? Oh, God, word? where are you? Say something if you can hear Alack, where are you speak, an if you hear; me. Say something, please! I’m almost fainting Speak, of all loves! I swoon almost with fear. with fear. Nothing? Then I guess you’re nowhere No? then I well perceive you all not nigh nearby. I’ll find you—or die—right away. Either death or you I'll find immediately.

Exit. HERMIA exits. ​ ​ ​

A Midsummer Night’s Dreamby William Shakespeare ​ ACT III, SCENE I. SETTING: The wood. TITANIA lying asleep.

CHARACTERS:

• Bottom (large role) • Cobweb (small role) • Flute (small role)

• Mustardseed (small role) • Peaseblossom (small role) • Puck (small role)

• Quince (medium role) • Snout (small role) • Starveling (small role)

• Titania (medium role)

SETTING THE SCENE: A group of actors is in a clearing in the forest near where Titania sleeps. They are rehearsing a play they will perform at the wedding of Theseus and Hippolyta. One actor, Bottom, is trying to convince the other that he should play all the parts because he will do them best. Puck enters and sees this nonsense. When Bottom steps outside the clearing, Puck follows. When they return, Bottom has unknowingly been transformed so he has the head of an ass. The other actors run away in fright.

QUINCE QUINCE O monstrous! O strange! we are haunted. Pray, Help! It’s a monster! We’re being haunted. Run, masters! fly, masters! Help! everyone, run!

Exit actors. Exit PUCK. Actors exit. PUCK exits. ​

BOTTOM BOTTOM Why do they run away? this is a knavery of Why are they running away? This is some joke them to of theirs to scare me. make me afeard.

Re-enter SNOUT. SNOUT enters. ​

SNOUT SNOUT O Bottom, thou art changed! What do I see on Oh, Bottom, you’ve changed! What’s on your thee? head?

BOTTOM BOTTOM What do you see? You see an asshead of your What do you think I’ve got on my head? You’re own, do acting like an ass, don’t you think? you?

Exit. SNOUT exits. ​

Re-enter QUINCE. QUINCE re-enters. ​

QUINCE QUINCE Bless thee, Bottom! bless thee! thou art God bless you, Bottom, God bless you. You’ve translated. been changed. Reborn.

Exit. QUINCE exits. ​

BOTTOM BOTTOM I see their knavery: this is to make an ass of I see what they’re up to. They want to make an me; ass of me, to scare me if they can. But I won’t to fright me, if they could. But I will not stir leave this spot, no matter what they do. I’ll walk from this place, do what they can: I will walk up and down and sing a song, so they’ll know up I’m not afraid. and down here, and I will sing, that they shall hear Sings I am not afraid. Sings

TITANIA TITANIA [Awaking] What angel wakes me from my (waking up) What angel is this who’s waking me ​ flowery bed? up from my bed of flowers?

BOTTOM sings to the end of his song. BOTTOMsings to the end of his song.

TITANIA TITANIA I pray thee, gentle mortal, sing again: Please sing again, sweet human. I love to listen Mine ear is much enamour'd of thy note; to your voice, and I love to look at your body. I So is mine eye enthralled to thy shape; know this is the first time I’ve ever seen you, but And thy fair virtue forces me to swear, I love you’re so wonderful that I can’t help swearing to thee. you that I love you.

BOTTOM BOTTOM Methinks, mistress, you should have little I don’t think you’ve got much of a reason to love reason me. But to tell you the truth, reason and love for that: and yet, to say the truth, reason and have very little to do with each other these days. love keep little company together now-a-days.

TITANIA TITANIA Thou art as wise as thou art beautiful. You’re as wise as you are beautiful.

BOTTOM BOTTOM Not so, neither: but if I had wit enough to get No, that’s not true. But if I were smart enough out to get out of this forest, I’d be wise enough to of this wood, I have enough to serve mine own satisfy myself. turn.

TITANIA TITANIA Out of this wood do not desire to go: Don’t bother wishing you could leave this forest, Thou shalt remain here, whether thou wilt or because you’re going to stay here whether you no. want to or not. I’m no ordinary fairy. And I love I am a spirit of no common rate. you. So come with me. I’ll give you fairies as And I do love thee: therefore, go with me; servants. And I’ll turn you into a spirit like us, so I'll give thee fairies to attend on thee, you won’t die as humans do. Fairies, take good And I will purge thy mortal grossness so care of him. Take him to my sleeping area. That thou shalt like an airy spirit go. Bring him to me in silence. Fairies, wait upon him; lead him to my bower. Tie up my love's tongue bring him silently.

Exeunt. They all exit. ​

A Midsummer Night’s Dreamby William Shakespeare ​ ACT III, SCENE II. SETTING: Another part of the wood.

CHARACTERS:

• Demetrius (medium role) • Helena (large role) • Hermia (large role)

• Lysander (medium role) • Oberon (small role) • Puck (small role)

Enter OBERON. OBERON, the Fairy King, enters. ​

OBERON OBERON I wonder if Titania be awaked; I wonder if Titania is awake yet, and if she is, I Then, what it was that next came in her eye, wonder what the first thing she saw was. Whatever Which she must dote on in extremity. it is, she must be completely in love with it now.

Enter PUCK. enters. ​ ​

OBERON OBERON Here comes my messenger. Ah, here comes my messenger.—What’s going on, How now, mad spirit! you crazy spirit? What havoc have you wreaked in What night-rule now about this haunted this part of the forest? grove?

PUCK My mistress with a monster is in love. My mistress Titania is in love with a monster. While Near to her close and consecrated bower, she was sleeping in her bed of flowers, a group of While she was in her dull and sleeping hour, bumbling idiots, got together nearby to rehearse A crew of patches, some play. I took opportunity to stick a donkey’s Were met together to rehearse a play head on the stupidest one. At that exact moment, The shallowest thick-skin of that barren sort, Titania woke up and immediately fell in love with When I did him at this advantage take, him, an ass. An asses face I fixed on his head: When in that moment, so it came to pass, Titania waked and straightway loved an ass.

OBERON OBERON This falls out better than I could devise. This is going even better than I planned. But have But hast thou yet latch'd the Athenian's eyes you put the love juice from the flower on the eyes With the love-juice, as I did bid thee do? of that Athenian, as I asked you to do?

PUCK I took him sleeping,—that is finish'd too,— Yes, I found him when he was asleep—so that’s And the Athenian woman by his side: taken care of too—and the Athenian woman was That, when he waked, of force she must be sleeping near him. When he woke up, he must eyed. have seen her.

Enter HERMIA and DEMETRIUS. DEMETRIUS and HERMIA enter. ​ ​ ​ OBERON OBERON Stand close: this is the same Athenian. (speaking so that only can hear) Step aside. Here’s ​ ​ ​ the Athenian coming now.

PUCK PUCK This is the woman, but not this the man. (speaking so that only OBERON can hear) That’s ​ ​ ​ definitely the woman I saw, but it’s not the same man.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS O, why rebuke you him that loves you so? Why are you so rude to someone who loves you so Lay breath so bitter on your bitter foe. much? Save that kind of harsh language for your worst enemy.

HERMIA HERMIA Now I but chide; but I should use thee I’m only scolding you now, but I should treat you worse, much worse, because I’m afraid you’ve given me For thou, I fear, hast given me cause to good reason to curse you. If you killed Lysander curse, while he was sleeping, then kill me, too. If thou hast slain Lysander in his sleep, Then kill me too.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS So should the murdered look, and so should That’s how someone who’s been murdered should I, look, and that’s how I look. You’ve pierced me Pierced through the heart with your stern through the heart with your cruelty. cruelty.

HERMIA HERMIA What's this to my Lysander? where is he? What does that have to do with my Lysander? Ah, good Demetrius, wilt thou give him me? Where is he? Oh, good Demetrius, will you find him for me?

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS I had rather give his carcass to my hounds. I would rather feed his corpse to my dogs.

HERMIA HERMIA Out, dog! Out, cur! thou drivest me past the Get out, dog! You’ve driven me to my wit’s end. bounds Did you kill him, then? Of maiden's patience. Hast thou slain him, then?

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS You spend your passion on a misprised You’re getting all worked up over a mood: misunderstanding. I didn’t kill Lysander. ?As far as I am not guilty of Lysander's blood; I know, he’s not even dead. Nor is he dead, for aught that I can tell.

HERMIA HERMIA I pray thee, tell me then that he is well. Then please tell me he’s all right.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS And if I could, what should I get therefore? If I told you that, what would I get out of it?

HERMIA HERMIA A privilege never to see me more. The privilege of never seeing me again. And now And from thy hated presence part I so: I’m going to leave your despised company. You’ll See me no more, whether he be dead or no. never see me again, whether or not he’s dead.

Exit. HERMIA exits. ​ ​ ​

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS There is no following her in this fierce vein: I can’t go after her when she’s in a rage like this. Here therefore for a while I will remain. So I’ll stay here for a while.

Lies down and sleeps (DEMETRIUS lies down and falls asleep.) ​ ​

OBERON OBERON (to ) What have you done? You’ve made a mistake ​ ​ ​ What hast thou done? thou hast mistaken and put the love-juice on someone else, someone quite who was truly in love. And laid the love-juice on some true-love's sight.

OBERON OBERON About the wood go swifter than the wind, Go around the forest, moving faster than the wind, And Helena of Athens look thou find: and make sure you find Helena of Athens. Bring her By some illusion see thou bring her here: here with some trick or illusion, and I’ll put the I'll charm his eyes against she do appear. charm on his eyes for when she comes.

PUCK PUCK I go, I go; look how I go, I go, I go, look at me go—faster than an arrow Swifter than arrow from the Tartar's bow. from a Tartar’s bow.

Exit. Exits. ​ ​ ​

OBERON OBERON Flower of this purple dye, (putting flower juice on DEMETRIUS ’s eyelids) ​ ​ Hit with Cupid's archery, You purple flower, hit by Cupid’s arrow, sink into Sink in apple of his eye. the pupils of this man’s eyes. When he sees the girl When his love he doth espy, he should love, make her seem as bright to him as Let her shine as gloriously the evening star. Young man, when you wake up, if As the Venus of the sky. she’s nearby, beg her to cure your lovesickness. When thou wakest, if she be by, Beg of her for remedy.

Re-enter PUCK. PUCK re-enters.

PUCK PUCK Captain of our fairy band, Helena is nearby, boss. The young man who I Helena is here at hand; mistook for this one is there too, begging her to And the youth, mistook by me, love him. Should we watch this ridiculous scene? Pleading for a lover's fee. Lord, what fools these mortals are! Shall we their fond pageant see? Lord, what fools these mortals be!

OBERON OBERON Stand aside: the noise they make Step aside. The noise they’re making will wake up Will cause Demetrius to awake. Demetrius.

PUCK PUCK Then will two at once woo one; Then the two of them will both pursue one girl. That must needs be sport alone; That will be funny enough, and preposterous And those things do best please me situations are my favorite thing. That befal preposterously.

Enter LYSANDER and HELENA. LYSANDER and HELENA enter. ​ ​ ​

LYSANDER LYSANDER Why should you think that I should woo in Why do you think I’m making fun of you when I scorn? tell you I love you? People don’t cry when they’re Scorn and derision never come in tears. mocking someone.

HELENA HELENA You do advance your cunning more and You get trickier and trickier. The promises you’re more. making to me belong to Hermia. Will you abandon These vows are Hermia's: will you give her her? o'er?

LYSANDER LYSANDER I had no judgment when to her I swore. I wasn’t thinking clearly when I made those promises to her.

HELENA HELENA Nor none, in my mind, now you give her And I don’t believe you’re thinking clearly now, as over. you break those promises.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Demetrius loves her, and he loves not you. Demetrius loves her, and he doesn’t love you.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS [Awaking] O Helena, goddess, nymph, (waking up) Oh Helena, you goddess, you divine ​ perfect, divine! and perfect nymph! What can I compare your eyes To what, my love, shall I compare thine eyes? to? Crystal isn’t as clear as they are. Oh, your lips Crystal is muddy. O, how ripe in show are as ripe as a pair of tempting cherries touching Thy lips, those kissing cherries, tempting each other! Oh, let me kiss your beautiful white grow! hand. It’ll make me so happy! When thou hold'st up thy hand: O, let me kiss This princess of pure white, this seal of bliss!

HELENA HELENA O spite! O hell! I see you all are bent Damn it! I see you’re all determined to gang up on To set against me for your merriment: me for a few laughs. If you had any manners at If you were civil and knew courtesy, all, you wouldn’t treat me like this. Can’t you just You would not do me thus much injury. hate me, as I know you do? Do you have to get Can you not hate me, as I know you do, together to humiliate me too? If you were real But you must join in souls to mock me too? men, as you pretend to be, you wouldn’t treat a If you were men, as men you are in show, lady this way, making vows and promises and You would not use a gentle lady so; praising my beauty when I know you’re really both To vow, and swear, and praise my parts, disgusted by me. You’re competing for Hermia’s When I am sure you hate me with your love, and now you’re competing to see which one hearts. of you can make fun of me the most. That’s a You both are rivals, and love Hermia; great idea, a really manly thing to do—making a And now both rivals, to mock Helena: poor girl cry! No respectable person would offend A trim exploit, a manly enterprise, an innocent girl just to have some fun. To conjure tears up in a poor maid's eyes With your derision! None of noble sort Would so offend a poor soul's patience, all for sport.

LYSANDER LYSANDER You are unkind, Demetrius; be not so; Don’t be cruel, Demetrius. I know you love For you love Hermia; this you know I know: Hermia, and you know I know it. Right here, right And here, with all good will, with all my heart, now, I swear I’m giving up all my claims on her In Hermia's love I yield you up my part; and handing her to you. In exchange, give up your And yours of Helena to me bequeath, claim to love Helena, since I love her and will love Whom I do love and will do till my death. her until I die.

HELENA HELENA Never did mockers waste more idle breath. Nobody’s ever gone to so much trouble just to make fun of someone.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Lysander, keep thy Hermia; I will none: Lysander, keep your Hermia. I don’t want her. If I If ever I loved her, all that love is gone. ever loved her, all that love is gone now. Now I’ll My heart to Helen is it home returned, love Helena forever. There to remain.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Helen, it is not so. Helena, it’s not true.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Disparage not the faith thou dost not know. Don’t insult a deep love that you don’t understand. Look, where thy love comes; yonder is thy Look, here comes the woman you love. dear.

Re-enter HERMIA. HERMIA re-enters.

HERMIA HERMIA Lysander, but why unkindly didst thou leave Lysander, why did you leave me alone so me so? unkindly?

LYSANDER LYSANDER Why should he stay, whom love doth press to Why stay when love tells you to go? go?

HERMIA HERMIA What love could press Lysander from my But what love could make my Lysander leave me? side?

LYSANDER LYSANDER Lysander's love, that would not let him bide, I had to hurry to my love, beautiful Helena. Why Fair Helena. are you looking for me? Didn’t you figure out that Why seek'st thou me? could not this make I left you because I hate you? thee know, The hate I bear thee made me leave thee so?

HERMIA HERMIA You speak not as you think: it cannot be. You can’t mean what you’re saying. It’s impossible.

HELENA HELENA Lo, she is one of this confederacy! So, she’s in on this too! Now I see that all three of Now I perceive they have joined all three them have gotten together to play this cruel trick To fashion this false sport, in spite of me. on me. Hurtful Hermia, you ungrateful girl, have Injurious Hermia! Most ungrateful maid! you conspired with these two to provoke me with Have you conspired, have you with these this horrible teasing? Have you forgotten all the contrived talks we’ve had together, the vows we made to be To bait me with this foul derision? like sisters to one another, all the hours we spent Is all the counsel that we two have shared, together, our friendship in our schooldays, our The sisters' vows, the hours that we have childhood innocence? Do you want to destroy our spent, old friendship by joining these men to insult your All school-days' friendship, childhood poor friend? It’s not friendly, and it’s not ladylike. innocence? All women would be angry with you for doing it, And will you rent our ancient love asunder, even though I’m the only one who’s hurt by it. To join with men in scorning your poor friend? It is not friendly, 'tis not maidenly: Our sex, as well as I, may chide you for it, Though I alone do feel the injury.

HERMIA HERMIA I am amazed at your passionate words. I’m completely dumbfounded by what you’re I scorn you not: it seems that you scorn me. saying. I’m not insulting you. It sounds more like you’re insulting me.

HELENA HELENA Have you not set Lysander, as in scorn, Come on, confess. Didn’t you send Lysander, as To follow me and praise my eyes and face? an insult, to follow me around praising my eyes And made your other love, Demetrius, and my face? Haven’t you made your other love, To call me goddess, nymph, divine and rare, Demetrius, call me a goddess and a divine, rare, Precious, celestial? Wherefore speaks he this precious, heavenly creature? Why does he talk like To her he hates? And wherefore doth that to a girl he can’t stand? And why does Lysander Lysander deny that he loves you, when he loves Deny your love, so rich within his soul, you so deeply? Why would he show me any And tender me, forsooth, affection, affection, unless you told him to? But by your setting on, by your consent?

HERMIA HERMIA I understand not what you mean by this. I don’t know what you’re talking about.

HELENA HELENA Ay, do, persevere, counterfeit sad looks, Oh, fine. All right, go ahead, keep up your little Make mouths upon me when I turn my back; game, pretend to be sympathetic, but then nudge Wink each at other; hold the sweet jest up. each other and wink and make faces at me when I If you have any pity, grace, or manners, turn my back. Keep up your wonderful game. If You would not make me such an argument. you had any sense of pity, or manners, you But fare ye well: 'tis partly my own fault; wouldn’t pretend to fight over me like this. But Which death or absence soon shall remedy. goodbye. It’s partly my own fault, since I followed you here. Leaving—or dying—will soon take care of everything.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Stay, gentle Helena; hear my excuse: Stay, lovely Helena. Listen to my excuse. My love, My love, my life my soul, fair Helena! my life, my soul, beautiful Helena!

HELENA HELENA O excellent! That’s a good one.

HERMIA HERMIA Sweet, do not scorn her so. (to LYSANDER) Don’t insult her like that, Lysander ​ ​ ​ darling.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS If she cannot entreat, I can compel. (to LYSANDER) If Hermia's begging can't make ​ ​ ​ you stop insulting Helena, I can force you to do so.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Thou canst compel no more than she entreat: You can’t force me any more than Hermia can beg Thy threats have no more strength than her me. Your threats are no stronger than her weak prayers. whining.—Helena, I love you. I swear I do. I’ll give Helen, I love thee; by my life, I do: my life for you, just to prove this guy wrong when I swear by that which I will lose for thee, he says I don’t love you. To prove him false that says I love thee not.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS I say I love thee more than he can do. I say that I love you more than he does.

LYSANDER LYSANDER If thou say so, withdraw, and prove it too. If that’s what you say, go fight a duel with me and prove it.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Quick, come! You’re on. Let’s do it.

HERMIA HERMIA Lysander, whereto tends all this? Lysander, where are you going with all this?

(Holds LYSANDER back.) (She holds LYSANDER back)

LYSANDER LYSANDER Away, you! (to HERMIA) Get away, you! ​ ​ ​

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS No, no; he'll seem to break loose. (to HERMIA) No, no. He’ll act like he’s going to ​ ​ ​ Take on as you would follow, break free from you, Hermia. But yet come not: you are a tame man, go! (to LYSANDER) Pretend like you’re going to follow ​ ​ ​ me, but then don’t come. You’re a coward, get out of here!

L YSANDER LYSANDER Hang off, thou cat, thou burr! Vile thing, let (to HERMIA) Stop hanging on me, you cat, you ​ ​ ​ loose, thorn. Let go of me, or I’ll shake you off like a Or I will shake thee from me like a serpent! snake.

HERMIA HERMIA Why are you grown so rude? what change is Why have you gotten so rude? What’s happened this? to you, my darling? Sweet love—

LYSANDER LYSANDER Thy love! Out, tawny Tartar, out! Your darling? Get out, you gypsy! Get out, you Out, loathed medicine! Hated potion, hence! horrible poison. Get out!

HERMIA HERMIA Do you not jest? Are you joking?

HELENA HELENA Yes, sooth; and so do you. Of course he is, and so are you.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Demetrius, I will keep my word with thee. Demetrius, I’m ready to fight you as promised.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS I would I had your bond, for I perceive I wish we had a signed legal contract. I can see A weak bond holds you: I'll not trust your you don’t keep your promises very well. I don’t word. trust you.

LYSANDER LYSANDER What, should I hurt her, strike her, kill her What? Do you want me to hit Hermia, hurt her, kill dead? her? Sure, I hate her, but I wouldn’t hurt her. Although I hate her, I'll not harm her so.

HERMIA HERMIA What, can you do me greater harm than (to LYSANDER) Can you hurt me any more than ​ ​ ​ hate? by saying you hate me? Hate me? Why? What’s Hate me! wherefore? O me! what news, my happened to you, my love? Am I not Hermia? love! Aren’t you Lysander? Am not I Hermia? are not you Lysander?

LYSANDER LYSANDER Be out of hope, of question, of doubt; It’s no joke. I hate you and love Helena. Be certain, nothing truer; 'tis no jest That I do hate thee and love Helena.

HERMIA HERMIA O me! you juggler! you canker-blossom! Oh, no! (to HELENA) You trickster, you snake! You ​ ​ ​ ​ You thief of love! what, have you come by thief! What, did you sneak in at night and steal my night love’s heart from him? And stolen my love's heart from him?

HELENA HELENA Fine, in faith! Oh, that’s very nice! You ought to be ashamed of Have you no modesty, no maiden shame, yourself! You’re going to make me mad enough to No touch of bashfulness? What, will you tear answer you? Damn you, you faker, you puppet! Impatient answers from my gentle tongue? Fie, fie! you counterfeit, you puppet, you!

HERMIA HERMIA Puppet? Why so? Ay, that way goes the “Puppet”? Why “puppet”?—Oh, I see where this is game. going. She’s talking about our difference in height. Now I perceive that she hath made compare She’s paraded in front of him to show off how tall Between our statures; she hath urged her she is. She won him over with her height.—Does height; he have such a high opinion of you because I’m so And with her personage, her tall personage, short? Is that it? So how short am I, you painted Her height, forsooth, she hath prevailed with barber pole? Tell me. How short am I? I’m not too him. short to gouge your eyes out with my fingernails. And are you grown so high in his esteem; Because I am so dwarfish and so low? How low am I, thou painted maypole? Speak; How low am I? I am not yet so low But that my nails can reach unto thine eyes.

HELENA HELENA I pray you, though you mock me, gentlemen, (to LYSANDER and DEMETRIUS) Please don’t let ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ Let her not hurt me: I was never cursed; her hurt me, gentlemen, however much you want I have no gift at all in shrewishness; to tease me. I never was much good with insults. I am a right maid for my cowardice: I’m not mean and catty like her. I’m a nice shy Let her not strike me. You perhaps may think, girl. Please don’t let her hit me. Maybe you think Because she is something lower than myself, that because she’s shorter than me I can take her. That I can match her.

HERMIA HERMIA Lower! Hark, again. “Shorter!” See, she’s doing it again!

HELENA HELENA Good Hermia, do not be so bitter with me. Good Hermia, please don’t act so bitter toward I evermore did love you, Hermia, me. I always loved you, Hermia, and gave you Did ever keep your counsels, never wrong'd advice. I never did anything to hurt you—except you; once, when I told Demetrius that you planned to Save that, in love unto Demetrius, sneak off into this forest. And I only did that I told him of your stealth unto this wood. because I loved Demetrius so much. He followed He followed you; for love I followed him; you. And I followed him because I loved him. But But he hath chid me hence and threatened he told me to get lost and threatened to hit me, me kick me—even kill me. Now just let me go quietly To strike me, spurn me, nay, to kill me too: back to Athens. I’ll carry my mistakes back with And now, so you will let me quiet go, me. I won’t follow you anymore. Please let me go. To Athens will I bear my folly back You see how naïve and foolish I’ve been. And follow you no further: let me go: You see how simple and how fond I am.

HERMIA HERMIA Why, get you gone: who is it that hinders Well, get out of here then! What’s keeping you? you?

HELENA HELENA A foolish heart, that I leave here behind. My stupid heart, which I’m leaving behind here.

HERMIA HERMIA What, with Lysander? What, you’re leaving it with Lysander?

HELENA HELENA With Demetrius. No, with Demetrius.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Be not afraid; she shall not harm thee, Don’t be afraid. She can’t hurt you, Helena. Helena.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS No, sir, she shall not, though you take her (to LYSANDER) That’s right, Hermia won’t hurt ​ ​ ​ part. Helena even if you try to help her.

HELENA HELENA O, when she's angry, she is keen and shrewd! Oh, when you get her angry, she’s a good fighter, She was a vixen when she went to school; and vicious too. She was a hellcat in school. And And though she be but little, she is fierce. even though she’s little, she is fierce.

HERMIA HERMIA 'Little' again! nothing but 'low' and 'little'! “Little” again? Nothing but “little” and “short”!— Why will you suffer her to flout me thus? Why are you letting her insult me like this? Let me Let me come to her. at her!.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Get you gone, you dwarf; (to HERMIA) Get lost, you dwarf, you tiny little ​ ​ ​ You minimus, of hindering knot-grass made; weed, you scrap, you acorn! You bead, you acorn.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS You are too officious You’re doing too much to defend a woman who In her behalf that scorns your services. wants nothing to do with you. Leave Hermia Let her alone: speak not of Helena; alone. Don’t talk about Helena. Don’t take Take not her part. Helena’s side.

LYSANDER LYSANDER Now she holds me not; Hermia’s not holding onto me anymore. Follow me Now follow, if thou darest, to try whose right, if you’re brave enough, and we’ll fight over Of thine or mine, is most in Helena. Helena.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Follow! nay, I'll go with thee, cheek by jowl. “Follow”? No, I’ll walk right next to you, side by side.

Exeunt LYSANDER and DEMETRIUS. DEMETRIUS and LYSANDER exit.

HERMIA HERMIA All this coil is 'long of you. Nay, go not back. All this fighting is because of you. Stay where you are.

HELENA HELENA I will not trust you, nor longer stay. I’m not sticking around here any more. I don’t Your hands than mine are quicker for a fray, trust you. You might be a better fighter than I am, My legs are longer though, to run away. but my legs are longer and I can run away faster.

Exit. HELENA exits. ​ ​ ​

HERMIA HERMIA I am amazed, and know not what to say. I just can’t believe any of this. I don’t know what to say.

Exit. HERMIA exits. ​

A Midsummer Night’s Dreamby William Shakespeare ​ ACT III, SCENE II CONTINUED. SETTING: In the wood.

CHARACTERS:

• Demetrius (small role) • Helena (small role) • Hermia (small role)

• Lysander (small role) • Oberon (medium role) • Puck (medium role)

OBERON OBERON This is thy negligence: still thou mistakest, (to ) This is all your fault. You make mistakes ​ ​ ​ Or else committest thy knaveries willfully. constantly, or else you cause this kind of trouble on purpose.

PUCK PUCK Believe me, king of shadows, I mistook. Believe me, King of Illusions, I made a mistake. Did not you tell me I should know the man Didn’t you tell me that I’d be able to recognize By the Athenian garment be had on? the man by the Athenian clothes he was wearing? And so far blameless proves my enterprise, So far I’ve done exactly what I was supposed to That I have annointed an Athenian's eyes; do—I put the love potion on an Athenian’s eyes. And so far am I glad it so did sort And so far I’m pleased with the way things have As this their jangling I esteem a sport. turned out, since I find all of this commotion very entertaining.

OBERON OBERON Thou sees these lovers seek a place to fight: As you can see, these lovers are looking for a Hurry therefore, Robin, overcast the night; place to fight. Hurry up, Robin, and make the And lead these testy rivals so astray night dark. And get these overeager rivals so As one come not within another's way. completely lost in the woods that they can’t run Like to Lysander sometime frame thy tongue, into each other. Imitate Lysander’s voice and egg Then stir Demetrius up with bitter wrong; Demetrius on with insults. Then rant for a while And sometime rail thou like Demetrius; in Demetrius’s voice, and egg Lysander on. That And from each other look thou lead them thus, way you’ll get them away from each other until Till over their brows death-counterfeiting sleep. they’re so exhausted that they’ll sleep like the Then crush this herb into Lysander's eye; dead. ( OBERON gives a new flower to )When ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ Whose liquor hath this virtuous property, they’re asleep, crush some of this flower’s juice To take from thence all error with his might, into Lysander’s eyes. The flower’s juice has the And make his eyeballs roll with wonted sight. power to erase all the damage that’s been done When they next wake, all this derision to his eyes, and to make him see normally, the Shall seem a dream and fruitless vision, way he used to. When they wake up, all this And back to Athens shall the lovers wend, trouble and conflict will seem like a dream or a With league whose date till death shall never meaningless vision. Then the lovers will go back end. to Athens, united together until death. While Whiles I in this affair do thee employ, you’re busy with that, I’ll go see Queen Titania I'll to my queen and beg her Indian boy; and ask her once again for the Indian boy. And And then I will her charmed eye release then I’ll undo the spell that I cast over her, so From monster's view, and all things shall be she won’t be in love with that monster anymore. peace. Then everything will be peaceful again.

PUCK PUCK My fairy lord, this must be done with haste. We’ve got to act fast, my lord of the fairies.

OBERON OBERON Haste; make no delay: Don’t delay. We still have time to get all of this We may effect this business yet ere day. done before daybreak.

Exit. OBERON exits. ​

PUCK PUCK Up and down, up and down, Up and down, up and down, I will lead them up and down: I will lead them up and down. I am feared in field and town: The people fear me in the country and the town. Goblin, lead them up and down. Goblin, lead them up and down. Here comes one. Here comes one of them now.

Enter LYSANDER. LYSANDER enters. ​ ​ ​

LYSANDER LYSANDER Where art thou, proud Demetrius? speak thou Where are you, Demetrius, you arrogant bastard? now. Say something.

PUCK PUCK Here, villain; drawn and ready. Where art (in DEMETRIUS’s voice) I’m over here, you villain, ​ ​ ​ thou? with my sword out and ready to fight. Where are you?

LYSANDER LYSANDER I will be with thee straight. I’m coming.

PUCK PUCK Follow me, then, (in DEMETRIUS’s voice) Let’s go to a flatter area ​ ​ ​ To plainer ground. where we can fight more easily.

Exit LYSANDER, as following the voice. LYSANDER exits. ​ ​ Re-enter DEMETRIUS. DEMETRIUS enters. ​ ​ ​

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Lysander! speak again: Lysander, say something! You coward, did you run Thou runaway, thou coward, art thou fled? away from me? Say something! Are you behind Speak! In some bush? Where dost thou hide some bush? Where are you hiding? thy head?

PUCK PUCK Come, thou child; (in LYSANDER’s voice) Come here, you coward! ​ ​ ​ I'll whip thee with a rod: he is defiled Come here, you child! I’ll beat you with a stick. It That draws a sword on thee. would be shameful to fight you with a sword, the way I would fight with a real man.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Yea, art thou there? Are you there?

PUCK PUCK Follow my voice: we'll try no manhood here. (in LYSANDER’s voice) Follow my voice. This isn’t a ​ ​ ​ good place to fight.

Exeunt. They exit. Re-enter LYSANDER. LYSANDER enters. ​ ​ ​

LYSANDER LYSANDER He’s walking ahead of me, and he keeps daring me He goes before me and still dares me on: to follow him. When I reach the place he’s calling When I come where he calls, then he is gone. from, he disappears. I’ll rest here. Here will rest me. (He lies down.) Lies down. I hope the pleasant daytime comes soon! As soon Come, thou gentle day! as the gray light of early morning appears, I’ll find For if but once thou show me thy grey light, Demetrius and get my revenge for this insult. I'll find Demetrius and revenge this spite.

LYSANDER sleeps. LYSANDER lies down and falls asleep. and ​ ​ Re-enter PUCK and DEMETRIUS. DEMETRIUS enter.

PUCK PUCK Ho, ho, ho! Coward, why comest thou not? (in LYSANDER’s voice) Ha, ha, ha! Hey, You ​ ​ ​ coward, why aren’t you coming?

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Abide me, if thou darest. Where art thou Wait for me, if you’re not too scared! Where are now? you now?

PUCK PUCK Come hither: I am here. (in LYSANDER’s voice) Come here. I’m over here. ​ ​ ​

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Nay, then, thou mockest me. Thou shalt buy No, you’re just taunting me. You’ll pay for this if I this dear, ever see you face-to-face in the daylight. Go If ever I thy face by daylight see: wherever you want. I’m exhausted; I need to lie Now, go thy way. Faintness constraineth me down and sleep on this cold ground. But watch To measure out my length on this cold bed. out. I’ll find you at dawn. By day's approach look to be visited. (DEMETRIUS lies down and sleeps) ​ ​ DEMETRIUS lies down and sleeps.

Re-enter HELENA. HELENA re-enters.

HELENA HELENA O weary night, O long and tedious night, Oh, what a long, tedious, exhausting night! I Abate thy hour! wish it would end.

HELENA lies down and sleeps (HELENA lies down and sleeps) ​ ​

PUCK PUCK Yet but three? Come one more; Only three so far? We’re still waiting for one Two of both kinds make up four. more. Two of both kinds makes four.

Enter HERMIA. HERMIA enters.

HERMIA HERMIA Never so weary, never so in woe, I’ve never been more exhausted or upset. I I can no further crawl, no further go; can’t crawl any farther. I just can’t go on. My My legs can keep no pace with my desires. legs can’t hold themselves up. I’ll sleep here Here will I rest me till the break of day. until morning. If they do fight, I hope Lysander Heavens shield Lysander, if they mean a fray! is safe!

HERMIA lies down and sleeps (HERMIA lies down and sleeps) ​ ​

PUCK PUCK On the ground Sleep well there on the ground. I’ll cure you, Sleep sound: gentle lover, by putting this medicine on your I'll apply eyes. (Puts the nectar of the flower on ​ ​ ​ To your eye, LYSANDER’s eyelids.)When you wake you will be ​ ​ Gentle lover, remedy. truly delighted to see the woman you once loved. Squeezing the juice on LYSANDER's eyes

When thou wakest, Thou takest True delight In the sight Of thy former lady's eye:

Exit PUCK. PUCK exits.

A Midsummer Night’s Dreamby William Shakespeare ​ ACT IV, SCENE I. SETTING: The same wood. LYSANDER, DEMETRIUS, HELENA, and HERMIA lying asleep. Enter TITANIA and BOTTOM; PEASEBLOSSOM, COBWEB, MOTH, MUSTARDSEED, and other Fairies attending; OBERON behind unseen

CHARACTERS:

• Bottom (large role) • Cobweb (small role) • Mustardseed (small role)

• Oberon (large role) • Peaseblossom (small role) • Puck (small role)

• Titania (medium role)

TITANIA TITANIA Come, sit thee down upon this flowery bed, (to BOTTOM) Come over here and sit down on this ​ ​ ​ While I thy amiable cheeks do coy, flowery bed while I caress those lovable cheeks. I’ll And kiss thy fair large ears, my gentle joy. kiss your big, beautiful ears, my gentle darling.

BOTTOM BOTTOM Where's Mounsieur Mustardseed? Where’s Sir Mustardseed?

MUSTARDSEED MUSTARDSEED What's your will? What would you like me to do?

BOTTOM BOTTOM Nothing, good mounsieur, but to help to Nothing, good sir, except to help scratch my head. I scratch. I must to the barber's, monsieur; should go to the barber’s, sir, because I think I’m formethinks I am marvellous hairy about getting really hairy around the face. And I’m such a the face; and I am such a tender ass, if my sensitive ass that if my hair tickles me a little, I hair do but tickle me, I must scratch. need to scratch.

TITANIA TITANIA Say, sweet love, what thou desirest to eat. Tell me, my sweet love, what you’d like to eat.

BOTTOM BOTTOM Truly, a peck of provender: I could munch Actually, I’d like a few pounds of grass. I’d like to your good munch on some good dry oats. Or a bundle of hay. dry oats. Methinks I have a great desire to a There’s nothing like good hay, really sweet hay. bottle of hay: good hay, sweet hay, hath no fellow.

TITANIA TITANIA I have a venturous fairy that shall seek I have an adventurous fairy who’ll go seek out the The squirrel's hoard, and fetch thee new squirrel’s secret stash and get you some fresh nuts. nuts.

BOTTOM BOTTOM I had rather have a handful or two of dried I’d rather have a handful or two of dried peas. But peas. please don’t let any of your people wake me up. I But, I pray you, let none of your people stir really want to sleep now. me: I have an exposition of sleep come upon me.

TITANIA TITANIA Sleep thou, and I will wind thee in my arms. Go to sleep, and I will wrap my arms around you. Fairies, begone, and be all ways away. Fairies, go away. Run off in all directions.

Exeunt fairies. The FAIRIES exit. TITANIA TITANIA Oh, how I love you! I’m so crazy about you! O, how I love thee! how I dote on thee! They sleep.

Enter PUCK. BOTTOM and TITANIA sleep. enters. ​ ​ ​

OBERON OBERON [Advancing] Welcome, good Robin. Welcome, good Robin. Do you see this sweet sight? ​ ​ See thou this sweet sight? Now I’m starting to pity Titania for being so Her dotage now I do begin to pity: infatuated. I ran into her recently at the edge of the For, meeting her of late behind the wood, forest, looking for sweet presents for this hateful Seeking sweet favours from this hateful idiot, and I scolded her and argued with her. When I fool, had taunted her as much as I wanted to, and she I did upbraid her and fall out with her; begged me very nicely to leave her alone, I asked When I had at my pleasure taunted her her for the stolen Indian child. She said yes right And she in mild terms begged my patience, away, and sent a fairy to bring him to my home in I then did ask of her the changeling child; Fairyland. And now that I have the boy, I’ll undo the Which straight she gave me, and her fairy spell that makes her vision so disgustingly wrong. sent And, gentle Puck, take this transformed ass’s head To bear him to my bower in fairy land. off of the head of that Athenian man, so that when And now I have the boy, I will undo he wakes up at the same time as the rest of them This hateful imperfection of her eyes: do, they can all go back to Athens. They’ll only And, gentle Puck, take this transformed remember the events of tonight as a very scalp unpleasant dream. But first I’ll release the fairy From off the head of this Athenian swain; queen from the spell. That, he awaking when the other do, May all to Athens back again repair And think no more of this night's accidents But as the fierce vexation of a dream. But first I will release the fairy queen. (OBERON squeezes the juice from the second ​ ​ (squeezing flower juice into TITANIA’s flower into TITANIA’s eyes) ​ ​ ​ ​ eyes) Be like you used to be, and see like you used to see. Be as thou wast wont to be; Now, Titania, wake up, my sweet queen. See as thou wast wont to see: Now, my Titania; wake you, my sweet queen.

TITANIA TITANIA My Oberon! what visions have I seen! (waking up) Oberon, I’ve had such a strange dream! ​ Methought I was enamoured of an ass. I dreamed I was in love with an ass.

OBERON OBERON There lies your love. There’s your boyfriend, sleeping right over there.

TITANIA TITANIA How came these things to pass? How did this happen? Oh, I hate looking at his face O, how mine eyes do loathe his visage now! now!

OBERON OBERON Silence awhile. Robin, take off this head. Be quiet for a while.—Robin, take off his donkey Titania, music call; and strike more dead head.—Titania, get the fairies to play some music, Than common sleep of all these five the and make these five people sleep soundly. sense.

TITANIA TITANIA Music, ho! music, such as charmeth sleep! Music! Play the kind of music that puts people to sleep.

Music, still. The music plays. ​

PUCK PUCK Now, when thou wakest, with thine (removing the ass’s head from BOTTOM) When you ​ ​ ​ own fool's eyes peep. wake up, see things with your own foolish eyes again.

OBERON OBERON Sound, music! Come, my queen, take hands Play the music.—Take my hands, my queen, and with me, we’ll lull these people to sleep with our soft dancing. And rock the ground whereon these (he dances with TITANIA) Now that you and I are ​ ​ ​ sleepers be. friends again, we can dance for Duke Theseus Now thou and I are new in amity, tomorrow at midnight, and bless his marriage and And will tomorrow midnight solemnly his marriage bed. These other lovers will get Dance in Duke Theseus' house married alongside him, and they’ll all be in high triumphantly, spirits. My queen, let’s travel silently and solemnly And bless it to all fair prosperity: across the globe to where it’s still night. There shall the pairs of faithful lovers be Wedded, with Theseus, all in jollity. My queen, in silence sad, Trip we after the night's shade.

TITANIA TITANIA Come, my lord, and in our flight While we’re walking, you can tell me how I ended up Tell me how it came this night sleeping on the ground with these humans last That I sleeping here was found night. With these mortals on the ground.

Exeunt. OBERON, TITANIA, and exit. Horns winded within. A hunting horn blows. THESEUS enters with his Enter THESEUS, HIPPOLYTA, EGEUS, servants, EGEUS and HIPPOLYTA. and train. ​

A Midsummer Night’s Dreamby William Shakespeare ​ ACT IV, SCENE I CONTINUED. SETTING: The same wood—Theseus, Hippolyta, Egeus and others are on a hunting trip. LYSANDER, DEMETRIUS, HELENA, and HERMIA lying asleep. Enter THESUS, EGEUS, HIPPOLYTA and attendants.

CHARACTERS:

• Bottom (small role) • Demetrius (small role) • Egeus (small role)

• Helena (small role) • Hermia (small role) • Lysander (medium role)

• Theseus (medium role)

THESEUS THESEUS We will, fair queen, up to the mountain's top, My beautiful queen, we’ll go up the mountain and And mark the musical confusion listen to the hounds as their barking echoes in the Of hounds and echo in conjunction. cliffs and sounds like music. My dogs are bred My hounds are bred out of the Spartan kind, from Spartan hounds. They’re not very fast in the Slow in pursuit, but matched in mouth like chase, but their barking sounds like bells ringing. bells, Each bark is perfectly in tune with the others, like Each under each. A cry more tuneable notes on a scale. No one, anywhere, has ever Was never heard, nor cheered with horn. gone hunting with a more musical pack of dogs. Judge when you hear. But, soft! what nymphs Judge for yourself when you hear them.(he sees ​ are these? the four lovers sleeping) But wait a minute! Who ​ are these women?

EGEUS EGEUS My lord, this is my daughter here asleep; My lord, that’s my daughter asleep on the ground And this, Lysander; this Demetrius is; over there, and this is Lysander here, and this is This Helena, Demetrius, and this is Helena. I don’t understand I wonder of their being here together. why they’re all here together.

THESEUS THESEUS No doubt they rose up early to observe the They probably woke up early to celebrate the day. day. But tell me, Egeus. Isn’t today the day when But speak, Egeus; is not this the day Hermia has to tell us her whether she’ll marry That Hermia should give answer of her Demetrius? choice?

EGEUS EGEUS It is, my lord. It is, my lord.

THESEUS THESEUS Go, bid the huntsmen wake them with their Go tell the hunters to blow their horns and wake horns. them up.

Exit one of the train. A servant exits.

Horns and shout within. LYSANDER, Someone shouts offstage. Horns are DEMETRIUS, HELENA, and HERMIA wake blown.LYSANDER, DEMETRIUS, HELENA, and and start up. HERMIA, wake up.

THESEUS THESEUS Good morrow, friends. Good morning, my friends.

LYSANDER, DEMETRIUS, HELENA, and LYSANDER, DEMETRIUS, HELENA, and HERMIA kneel. HERMIA all kneel. ​

LYSANDER LYSANDER Pardon, my lord. Forgive us, my lord.

THESEUS THESEUS I pray you all, stand up. Please, all of you, stand up.

LYSANDER, DEMETRIUS, HELENA, and LYSANDER, DEMETRIUS, HELENA, and HERMIA stand. HERMIA get up. ​

THESEUS THESEUS (to LYSANDER and DEMETRIUS) ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ ​ I know you two are rival enemies: I know you two are enemies. Has the world really How comes this gentle concord in the world, become so gentle and peaceful that people who That hatred is so far from jealousy, hate each other have started to trust each other To sleep by hate, and fear no enmity? and sleep beside each other without being afraid?

LYSANDER LYSANDER My lord, I shall reply amazedly, My lord, what I say may be a little confused, since Half sleep, half waking: but as yet, I swear, I’m half asleep and half awake. I swear, at the I cannot truly say how I came here; moment I really couldn’t tell you how I ended up But, as I think, here. But I think I came here with Hermia. We I came with Hermia hither: our intent were planning to leave Athens to escape the Was to be gone from Athens, where we Athenian law. might, Without the peril of the Athenian law.

EGEUS EGEUS Enough, enough, my lord; you have enough: (to THESEUS) Enough, enough, my lord. You’ve ​ ​ ​ I beg the law, the law, upon his head. heard enough evidence! I insist that the law They would have stolen away; they would, punish him—They were going to run away, Demetrius, Demetrius, they were running away to defeat us, Thereby to have defeated you and me, robbing you of your wife and me of my fatherly You of your wife and me of my consent, right to decide who my son-in-law will be. Of my consent that she should be your wife.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS My lord, fair Helen told me of their stealth, (to THESEUS) My lord, the beautiful Helena told me ​ ​ ​ Of this their purpose hither to this wood; about their secret plan to escape into this forest. I And I in fury hither followed them, was furious and followed them here, and the lovely Fair Helena in fancy following me. Helena was so in love with me that she followed But, my good lord, I know not by what me. I’m not sure how it happened—but somehow, power,— something made my love for Hermia melt away like But by some power it is,—my love to snow. Now the only person I love, and believe in, Hermia, and want to look at, is Helena. I was engaged to Melted as the snow. her before I ever met Hermia. Now I want Helena, I And all the faith, the virtue of my heart, love her, I long for her, and I will always be true to The object and the pleasure of mine eye, her. Is only Helena. To her, my lord, Was I betrothed ere I saw Hermia. Now I do wish her, love her, long for her, And will for evermore be true to her.

THESEUS THESEUS Fair lovers, you are fortunately met. You pretty lovers are lucky you met me here. Egeus, I will overbear your will; Egeus, I’m overriding your wishes. These couples For in the temple by and by with us will be married along with me and Hippolyta in the These couples shall eternally be knit. temple later today.

Exeunt THESEUS, HIPPOLYTA, EGEUS, THESEUS, HIPPOLYTA, and EGEUS exit with and train. their followers. ​

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS These things seem small and What exactly just happened? The events of last undistinguishable, night seem small and hard to see clearly.

HERMIA HERMIA Methinks I see these things with parted eye, Yes, it’s like my eyes are out of focus, and I’m When every thing seems double. seeing everything double.

HELENA HELENA So methinks: Me too. I won Demetrius so easily, as if he were a And I have found Demetrius like a jewel, precious diamond I just found lying around. It’s Mine own, and not mine own. mine because I found it, but I feel like someone else could easily come and claim it was hers.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Are you sure Are you sure we’re awake? It seems to me like That we are awake? It seems to me we’re still sleeping, still dreaming. Do you That yet we sleep, we dream. Do not you remember seeing the duke here? Did he tell us to think follow him? The duke was here, and bid us follow him?

HERMIA HERMIA Yea; and my father. Yes, he did. And my father was here too.

LYSANDER LYSANDER And he did bid us follow to the temple. And he told us to follow him to the temple.

DEMETRIUS DEMETRIUS Why, then, we are awake: let's follow him Well, then, we’re awake. Let’s follow him. We can And by the way let us recount our dreams. tell one another our dreams along the way.

Exeunt. LYSANDER, DEMETRIUS, HELENA, and HERMIA ​ exit.

BOTTOM BOTTOM [Awaking] God's my life, stolenhence, and (Waking up) My God, they’ve all run away and left ​ ​ ​ left me asleep! I have had a most rare me sleeping here? What a weird dream I had.—You vision. I have had a dream. Methought I can’t even describe such a weird dream. I’ll write was—there is no man can tell what. I will this dream down as a ballad. I’ll call it “Bottom’s write a ballad of this dream: it shall be called Dream” because it’s so deep that it has no bottom. Bottom's Dream,because it hath no bottom; And I’ll sing it for the duke in the later part of the and I will sing it in the play. latter end of a play, before the duke.

Exit. BOTTOM exits. ​ ​ ​

Enter PUCK. PUCK enters.

PUCK PUCK If we shadows have offended, If we actors have offended you, just think of it this Think but this, and all is mended, way and everything will be all right—you were That you have but slumbered here asleep when you saw these visions, and this silly While these visions did appear. and pathetic story was no more real than a dream. And this weak and idle theme, Ladies and gentlemen, don’t get upset with me. If No more yielding but a dream, you forgive us, we’ll make everything all right. I’m Gentles, do not reprehend: an honest Puck, and I swear that if we’re lucky if you pardon, we will mend: enough not to get hissed at, we’ll make it up to you And, as I am an honest Puck, soon. If not, then I’m a liar. So good night to If we have unearned luck everyone. Give me some applause, if we’re friends, Now to escape the serpent's tongue, and Robin will make everything up to you. We will make amends ere long; Else the Puck a liar call; So, good night unto you all. Give me your hands, if we be friends, And Robin shall restore amends.