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Spiritual Abuse : When the System Becomes the Persecutor Gary R Digital Commons @ George Fox University Doctor of Ministry Seminary 1-1-2011 Spiritual abuse : when the system becomes the persecutor Gary R. Veenhuizen George Fox University This research is a product of the Doctor of Ministry (DMin) program at George Fox University. Find out more about the program. Recommended Citation Veenhuizen, Gary R., "Spiritual abuse : when the system becomes the persecutor" (2011). Doctor of Ministry. Paper 12. http://digitalcommons.georgefox.edu/dmin/12 This Dissertation is brought to you for free and open access by the Seminary at Digital Commons @ George Fox University. It has been accepted for inclusion in Doctor of Ministry by an authorized administrator of Digital Commons @ George Fox University. GEORGE FOX UNIVERSITY SPIRITUAL ABUSE: WHEN THE SYSTEM BECOMES THE PERSECUTOR A DISSERTATION SUBMITTED TO THE FACULTY OF GEORGE FOX EVANGELICAL SEMINARY IN CANDIDACY FOR THE DEGREE OF DOCTOR OF MINISTRY BY GARY R. VEENHUIZEN PORTLAND, OREGON DECEMBER, 2011 ii Copyright © 2011 by Gary R. Veenhuizen All rights reserved. Unless otherwise indicated, scripture quotations marked NLT are taken from the Holy Bible , New Living Translation, copyright 1996. Used by permission of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., Wheaton, Illinois 60189. All rights reserved. Scripture quotations marked NKJV are taken from New King James Version, copyright 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. All rights reserved. Used by permission. Scripture quotations marked KJV are taken from the King James Version and are Public Domain. iii iv CONTENTS PREFACE ………………………………………………………………………………… vii LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS ……………………………………………………………… ix ABSTRACT………………………………………………………………………………… x Chapter 1. INTRODUCTION ………………………………………………………………… 1 Current Resources Definitions of Spiritual Abuse Characteristics of Spiritual Abuse Causes of Spiritual Abuse Purpose Organizational Context Summary Statement 2. A FOUNDATION OF RELATIONAL THEOLOGY…………………………. 19 Definitions The Call to Relationship Relation-ship and Community Connectedness and Character Love Interdependence and Self Relationship to Creation 3. SPIRITUAL ABUSE IN THE SCRIPTURES……………………………….…40 Old Testament Archetypes v The Law Builds a Platform for Abusers The Law and Abuse New Testament Archetypes The Religious Authorities Early NT Church Case Study 4. SPIRITUAL ABUSE IN CHRISTIAN HISTORY…………………….….……67 Abuse in Religious Constructs Major Heresies of the Past Traits of Abuse in Heresies Some Observations about Institutional Systems The Reformation Story A Closer Look at an Abusive System The System Becomes the Persecutor 5. THE PATHWAY TO ABUSE…………………….…………………………….94 Sources of Abuse Short Survey OF Frank W. Sandford’s Life Covenant Relationship vs. Abusive Relationships 6. SYNTHESIS AND CONLUSIONS…………………………………………....120 Created for Community Principles of Relationship Covenant Grace Empowerment vi Intimacy Bringing Both Ends Together BIBLIOGRAPHY…………………………….…………………………………..138 vii PREFACE I have been asked many times by my friends and acquaintances what I intend to do with this degree. I know what they mean, of course. What career change will occur now that this is over? Well, I have some thoughts on what may happen. Several offers to use this accumulated information for the Kingdom have surfaced. But the fact is, “doing,” “being,” and “becoming” has been happening all along. This process has provoked several rabbit trails of thought over these last eight years. In sharing, listening and interacting in my own relational world, much of what I have been processing has been foisted onto my unsuspecting friends. Others, simply asking about the topic, have responded with their own stories of abusive relationships in churches. It gives me pause to wonder how, or if, these organizations we so closely attach ourselves to, could be structured or designed to eliminate the painful experiences perpetrated on Jesus’ sheep. Then I remember—these painful experiences are more often perpetrated by Jesus’ sheep. Actually, we are all broken and in need of restoration in our relationships with God, ourselves, others and creation. That is what living each day is ultimately about. Of those who told stories of their own experiences, several offered their permission to include their stories in this work. Those offers are deeply appreciated. It was not possible to do so, however, since many examples of abuse were not necessary for this paper. I do want to acknowledge their offer and state that they are exactly why this topic is so relevant. Broken, abused people are a pandemic reality. My deepest thanks for encouragement toward completing this effort belong to some good friends: Dr. Bill Vermillion, my mentor, along with Charlie Ryan, Bill Winkenbach, Bob Ward and Jeff Rasch, who when I met with them regularly they asked viii (with a friendly push) how I was progressing. These gentlemen, successful in their own careers and personal accomplishments, were able to model differentiation and while keeping me accountable to them and my own goals. Thanks guys! My wife Kathy of thirty-eight years and my four children, Jennifer, Melissa, Julie Ann and Scott are also owed a huge debt of gratitude. They gently urged me to “get with it” even though other activities of life called for my immediate attention. Thank you, my family; you are truly my richest treasure and joy in this life. Now all glory to God, who is able to keep you from falling away and will bring you with great joy into his glorious presence without a single fault. All glory to him who alone is God, our Savior through Jesus Christ our Lord. All glory, majesty, power, and authority are his before all time, and in the present, and beyond all time! Amen. Jude 1:24-25 -NLT Gary Veenhuizen September 6, 2011 ix ILLUSTRATIONS FIGURE 1: Types of Commitment in Family Relationships……………………...115 x ABSTRACT Title: RECOGNIZING SPIRITUAL ABUSE IN A CHURCH SYSTEM Author: Gary R. Veenhuizen Degree: Doctor of Ministry Year: 2011 Institution: George Fox Evangelical Seminary Spiritual abuse is an extremely subtle issue in its early stages. Often one doesn’t recognize when they are a subject of abuse, or how they have been influenced in ways that are controlling and involve manipulation of behavior and thought. It should be understood that all institutional systems are vulnerable to manipulation by leadership, tradition or culture of the system or organization. I am proposing that it is possible that a system itself can be an abuser, inflicting spiritual control and manipulation on the organization, the leadership and members for future generations. I want to examine the earmarks of unhealthy leadership style, authoritarian behavior or tradition methodology that may incubate and contribute to an environment that could spawn the type of abuse to which I refer. There are many types of abuse, of course. When individuals or people groups allow themselves to be manipulated they are subject to control by others. Often, the subject is not even aware of the manipulation at first because it is usually balanced and legitimized with meeting some real or perceived need the subject may have. However, even these “needs” may be guilt instilled within the subject by the perpetrator. For example, the leader may preach that certain activities may be sin and xi even the gateway to hell unless these activities are avoided. If the subject avoids the activity, they are accepted and held up as examples of piety but if they partake of the offending activity, they are shunned. Most people have a need for community acceptance and in this environment they believe they are loved if they meet certain conditions. This paper will focus on abuse that occurs in mainstream religious groups and institutions. I will identify factors more ambiguous than the obviously irrational David Koreshes and Jim Joneses of the world. There are seemingly ordinary leaders who use their positions for inappropriate control. Traditions also exist that have evolved over time to become unhealthy systems that add implicitly or even explicitly to Jesus’ message. I will examine one of these systems from its historical beginnings to present day as a case study. The extent and scope of spiritual abuse is not known. It will be imperative to define what is meant by “Spiritual Abuse” and the potential level of destruction that may be experienced by the abused. In order to so, several questions must be answered. How and when is spiritual abuse manifest? What are the warning signs? How does an abusive and persecutory system present itself? What happens to leaders and followers who experience such abuse? Is there an early warning system, or even clues for alerting potential victims? Can one arm him/herself to avoid being seduced by institutional systems into codependency? These types of questions can be summarized in three overarching questions: What are the signs of institutional systemic abuse? Is it possible for a church system to become an abusive persecutor? xii What are some principles to guide an institutional system to return from or prevent abuse? In order to address the problem of spiritual abuse, I will propose a set of principles based on a covenant model. This covenant is designed to provide organizational guidance for leaders to move away from systemic abuse toward a healthy covenant relationship model that inspires renewal and growth. Chapter 1 provides an introduction of the problem. This chapter will examine definitions of spiritual abuse and related terms, relate an interview, present systemic abuse in context with historical data, include a synopsis of the basic development of that system along with the organizational structure and demographics. Some of the relevant symbolism used in the system that contributes to the issue will also be identified. In Chapter 2, I have constructed a Foundation of Relational Theology. There, I will describe God’s call to relationship, including a definition of sin, the deception that predicated humanity’s need for reconciliation to God. I will also explore the concept of relationships and community and how individual character plays a role in the context of community. We will see how love, the greatest of all virtues, informs and motivates behavior in community.
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