Time Out: 1. Boom Baby Boom 2. Jessie Street
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AUSTRALIAN LEFT REVIEW 37 BOOM Baby BOOM What is making so many feminists in their thirties turn to motherhood? Julie McCrossin, alias Dr Mary Hartman, psychoanalyses. Dear Patient, * And she was waving to her man as relentless ticking of your biological My name is Dr. Mary Hartman. I he drove off to work. She picked up the clock. run a chain of highly lucrative private morning paper, turned and walked into If you don’t have a baby soon, will (of course) clinics for people just like the house. it be TOO LATE? And so, before too you: people who suffer from profound Suddenly she realised that she was long, you present at my clinic with the psycho-sexual malfunction. utterly alone with a tiny person whose tell-tale swelling of the belly. It may interest you to know that a entire conversational range consisted of Patient this is just one example. As recent survey has shown that readers of "Goo goo" and "Gar gar". you know, people of all ages are having the Australian Left Review are made up In terror she tried to make the baby children these days. of a statistical majority of psycho-sexual discuss the frontpage story in the Finan All ages and all sexual preferences. cripples. cial Review. Animal, vegetable, and mineral. And so it was with particular The child farted and fell asleep. Lesbian separatist women who pleasure that I agreed to take this oppor My feminist patient looked in the haven ’t even let a man inside their tunity to tell you about a new threat to mirror and screamed. house for years are suddenly running > your psycho-sexual health. She had entered the Twilight Zone around with an empty vegemite jar in Patient, a plague is sweeping this of BABY BOOM PSYCHOSIS! one hand, and a turkey baster in the nation. Patient, I know what some of you other. A plague that is changing the very are thinking. I don’t want to sound like And they spend their weekends lis fabric of daily life. a white-coated professional know-it-all. tening to "wimmin’s" programs on You look all around you and what But I do. You’re reading this and, public radio, and poking tiny tadpoles do you see? in a deep, dark comer of your mind, into their innermost regions in a Babies!! you’re wondering "do I want a baby?" desperate bid to conceive. Every second person seems to be You know the family is a reaction THIS IS A BABY BOOM IN having one. ary organ of the state: but do you want DEED! And everyone else is thinking a baby? You think to yourself: And we all know a couple who are about having one. "But I’ve got so many other things "trying" to have a baby. Or helping someone else to have to do. And they insist on telling you about one. My job is fulfilling. it. Or regretting not having had one al My union activity is important You get a picture in your mind of ready. I enjoy my friends and my social two people constantly in coitus - 24 Or even, God help them, planning life." hours day. a second. But this voice inside your head A classic symptom of the "trying Everywhere you look, it’s babies, keeps saying, quietly, insistently: "Do I couple" is the obsessive urge to keep the babies, babies. And you don’t know want a baby?" sperm in the love pocket for as long as what to do. And in the distance you can hear a possible. I had one young patient who I had a patient in the clinic just the ticking, ticking, ticking sound. One insisted on standing on her head for an other day who’d been an active feminist morning you look in the mirror and you hour after intercourse so that not a single for years. She’d had a high priority job see your first grey hairs. And still you drop of the precious seminal fluid could in the law and a government hear this ticking, ticking, ticking. slip down her leg into barren oblivion. bureaucracy. A little later you notice you’ve got Another lassie rigged up an She’d set her goals, planned her crows’ feet. And the bags under your elaborate system of ropes and pulleys so ' Path and made it to the top! eyes never seem to disappear complete that she could continue her household One morning she woke up and ly any more. And still this ticking, tick duties, like vacuuming and washing up, found herself standing at the front door ing, ticking, is nagging in the comer of all the time remaining upside down - of her house in her nightdress. your mind. secure in the knowledge that her love She was barefoot, a baby on the WHAT IS THAT SOUND? pouch was full. breast. And suddenly you realise - it’s the Clearly, the question must be 38 AUSTRALIAN LEFT REVIEW asked: why do these patients want a permanently four years old and always nightly bedtime battle, that she’d baby so much? asking questions. Questions they long to retreated into a full combat fantasy. From my clinical experience you try to answer. Late each afternoon, as the child can divide the would-be parents into Like: where do clouds come from? played innocently in the backyard out two main groups: the Sensualists and Who makes the wind? Why is the sky side, mother was in her bedroom chang the Pedagogues. blue? You can become a gum with just ing into jungle greens. The Sensualists want a child so one little follower. Your child will be a At exactly 1700 hours mother they can love a little person uncondi blank sheet of paper, and the pen is in blackened her face, pulled on her com tionally. your hand. You can create your dream. bat boots and armed herself with a set of They imagine picking up the child Of course, both groups of potential the child’s pyjamas. Then she crawled from pre-school. parents are in for a dreadful shock once on her belly down the hall of her house, A little child in tiny shoes with an the baby actually arrives. out the back door and across the lawn itty-bitty school bag. As you approach Even a Spielberg movie can’t towards the unsuspecting child. the school you see your child playing in prepare you for the full horror of what’s She had become RAMBO a crowd of kids. inside that bucket of Napisan, left un MOTHER. Your child spots you. touched for eight days. IT’S BEDTIME. Her face lights up. AND THERE’S NO TURNING Her little body quivers with And who but a parent can com BACK!!! pleasure just because it’s you. prehend the terrible nagging tiredness Patient, if you have identified with She throws open her little arms and of disrupted sleep, disrupted sleep for any of these symptoms, I look forward runs towards you. months. Your head rolls forward, your to seeing you at one of my clinics. You can’t help yourself, you start eyes roll back. And half the people at miming too. work think you’ve become a heroin ad Yours sincerely, And as you rush into each other’s dict on the nod. Dr. Mary Hartman. arms, New Age Music starts playing But it’s the question of discipline from beneath the pavement that really sends most of my patients This is the Sensualists. into full-blown psychosis. And the Pedagogues - they always I had a mother come to me recent JULIE McCROSSIN Is a freelance Jour imagine their potential child as being ly, who’d been driven so mad by the nalist and comedy performer. AUSTRALIAN LEFT REVIEW 3* JESSIE STREET - FEMINIST EXTRAORDINARY supporter of justice for minorities, a leader of campaigns for the ending of discrimination against Australian Aborigines. From 1929, when she was a co founder of the United Associations of Women, whose watchword was "Freedom, Equality of Status and Op portunity", what she said, wrote and did were reported in the press. She was a controversial figure because she worked vigorously for causes unpopular with in fluential sections of the community: wages for wives and mothers, equal pay for equal work in peace and wartime, equal opportunity and status in all he areas where women were barred be cause they were women. Her support for the Australian-Russian friendship movement was tolerated during the war, as was her welcoming of communist women into the United Associations of Women. From 1946 she was the subject of attacks from conservative individuals and organisations; in 1948 she left the Labor Party rather than turn her back on the Australia-Russia Society. What made Jessie Street the more controversial was that, by birth, economic circumstances, education and marriage,she belonged in the upper echelons of Australian society. Her radi cal views set her apart from the class to which, in other ways, she belonged, sTR ALM though there were many other women like her, articulate, university trained, i Street at the Status of Women Commission of the United Nations 1948. with the financial independence and leisure that enabled them to work with 7his year marks the centenary of there were no women in federal par her in their commitment to feminism. Jessie Street’s birth. Winifred liament, she stood as a Labor Party But their social standing and their candidate in the Liberal stronghold of educational abilities also set them apart Mitchell remembers the Wentworth electorate, almost from the labour movement, including defeating the sitting member; she was trade unionists.