THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 707

The Notre Dame Scholastic

A LITERARY—NEWS WEEKLY PUBLISHED AT THE UNIVERSITY OF NOTRE DAME

ILLUSTRATED

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VOL. LVIII. MARCH 26, 1926. No. 23 INDEX Frontispiece 708 Easter Garden (A Poem) Charles PMllvps 708 The Week _...J. A. Withey 709 Musical and Theatrical Notes —A. L. Meyers 714 The College Parade /. T. Cullinan 718 Editorial . 719 Enter Easter L. R. Mclntyre, '28 720 The Silent Warning Joseph B. Shanley, '29 721 The Splendor of That Day (A Poem) Cornelms Shea, '28 722 On Growing Up Be-i-nard Garber, '28 723 Rewards of Vengeance ._: Victor L. Zimmerman, '28 724 The Collegiate Convention John Gibbons, '26 726 Peter, the Cat Robert Caves'MS,'2?> T21 Sport News J. P. McNamara 728 The Safety Valve 736

Advertisers in Notre Dame publications deserve the patronage of Notre Dame men.

Entered as second-class ^natter at Notre Dame, Indiana. Acceptance for mailiiin at special rate of postafie. Section 1103, October S, 1017, authorized June 2.7, lOlS. 708 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

Easter Garden Here where the ivintei-'s blight too long has lain, A tomb no longer, but a gateway bright And barren frost the only floiuer to bloom, That smiling opens to life's ga/i'den fair Noiv sudden siveeps the sweet ablution, rain; Whereunto, beckoning our souls from night. . Noio, through the veiling tears tve see the tomb- Our Master passes on the breath of prayer.^ —CH. PH, THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 709

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We see by the editorial page that it's here. things, a prologue. But nobody was cheated The storm doors are gone froni the Main and comparative haniiony reigns once more. Building. Mr. Navarre may now open class­ Then there was the Monday night concert room windows without fear of being tossed which stands out as undoubtedly the best out bj'' shivering fellow students. Sheep­ ever offered on the stage of Washington skins cast longing eyes toward the cedar Hall. There was also the Passion Play at S-t. chest and the moth-balls. One hardy pioneer Mary's: we note but do not qualify. Rather has already walked around the lakes and a giddy week-end, all told. lived to tell the tale. Poetry and mud flour­ Seniors are beginning to look worried. ish side by side and the slicker has come into Some mathematical genius has figured out its own again. that, after Easter vacation, but a scant three To preserve the essential unity of this is­ weeks remain in which to do a thesis. The sue, we should chronicle here a frightful list realization of this appalling fact is distinctly of melodramatic happenings. But it is hard upsetting. Thus far the Seniors have ac­ to live up to the note struck by The Reward cepted the dictum of one who should know: of Vengeance and The Warning Something- "When you've got your proposition you're or-other. The titles sound so bloodthirsty half done." Confidence in this blithe aphor­ that we lacked courage to read further. May- ism is beginning to wane. he you don't. Anysvay there is not much On with the Easter formals! Not very of melodrama to record. many are planned for this year but those Unless 3'ou take Macbeth at the Oliver last few sound entertaining-. When one considers Saturday night. Every student who under­ that a week of Easter vacation contains but stands the English language seems to have one day which is not dedicated to something attended at least one of the Mantell per­ other than amusement, it is distinctly con­ formances. Saturday night was easily the soling to be able to look forward to a good most popular, probably because in that play dance on that one day. our local actors took the most prominent Three hundred philosophy students at­ parts of their two-day engagement. Mr. tempted to learn how to measure an atom Lemmer, we believe, enacted the sterling last Monday night. Yes, they attempted. role of Another Lord: we are not quite sure And now they can all say "So interesting^: but inany of his friends seem to have recog­ but very involved." nized his public speaking-debating-Washing- Most philosophy students prefer to read ton-Day-Oration voice in that tremendous the Juggler anyway, particularly when it has line: "All hail! the King!" Anywaj'-, a tempting Jew on the cover. Dear old Shakespeare came and went, and furnished Brownson tui-ns out for something called food for discussion in most of the English spring practice and the church clock con­ classes. And that's something. tinues to be amazingly on time. Earnest A surprising number" of entertainments professors give quarterly examinations and appeared to break the Lenten monotony. The earnest ladies of the bucket scrub vigorously Absurdities succeeded in charming both at the mud on the steps of the Main Build­ smiles and dollars from large audiences who ing. Both discover unsuspected things. came for a laugh and got, among other —J.A.W. 710 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

GROOM FOR EASTER DANCES tersch — announce "Chuck" Halweigen's or­ You've heard it—who hasn't?—^that thun­ chestra. derous thud-thud of number twelves bearing The "trous" are pressed. On with the foot- tons of he-man avoirdupois to and fro about fest! the campus. It's only the collective Notre Dame man gently flitting to and from class­ ANNOUNCE MEDALS AND PRIZES es. A certain number of medals and prizes Yes, you've heard it — but did you ever are awarded at Commencement each year on witness the collective N. D. man in his role the basis of competitive effort. The atten­ as a ballroom charmer? Iron heels discarded tion of all students who may be interested, for petite pumps and twinkling toes displac­ is called to the following list of competitive ing hammering heels. That's the son of the prizes, supplied by Father DeWulf, chairman Golden Dome at affairs like these: of the Faculty Committee on Scholarships The boys from big, bad Chicago will rattle and Prizes. Details can be learned from the unruly hoofs at a no-civies-allowed affair in heads of departments listed. All prize es­ the Grand Ball Room of the new Palmer says are due by May 1. House Tuesday, April 6. The proper atmos­ phere will be injected by Harry Denny and The Meehan medal for English is awarded his Notre Dame Collegians, and fair play will to the student in the Senior Class who writes be seen to by John McMullen, President of the most satisfactory essay on a literary the Notre Dame-Chicago Club. All visiting subject. Consult Father Carrico, head of Notre Dame men are invited to attend. the Department of English. The Barry medal for elocution is awarded Three bucks! That's the glad greeting on the basis of a contest to be held June 1. from the Toledo gang. Unlike the gentle­ Consult Professor Kelly, head of the Depart­ men from the home of the W. G. N., how­ ment of Speech and Drama. ever, thej'^ do not bar hand-me-do^vns. They call it a Spring Informal, and jubilantly an­ The Dockweiler medal for Philosophy is nounce the acquisition of Tom Howard's Co­ awarded to the Senior in the College of Arts lumbus Darkies to convert notes into noise and Letters who submits the most satisfac­ from nine till one (o'clock). They follow tory essay on a philosophical subject. Con­ the lead of the W. G. N.'s by celebrating the sult Father Miltner, head of the Department same evening, but go them one better by of Philosophy. broadcasting publicity concerning certain The Monsignor F. A. O'Brien Prize is "entertainers and novel decorative effects." awarded to the student, in any college of the Now that the season of unmentionable University, for special study and distinction weather is over, the Hoosiers come out of in a historical subject. This is a money hiding and say things about the Fort Wayne prize. Consult Father Ryan, head of the De­ Club, the Anthony Hotel, Harry Denny's Col­ partment of History. legians, and Easter Monday. Fair enough! Fifty dollars is awarded by the South Bend Tribune to the student in the School Not to be imitative, or anything like that, of Journalism who submits the most satis­ but Easter Monday is mentioned in dispatch­ factory thesis on a journalistic subject. Con­ es concerning the Grand Rapids bunch also. sult Professor Cooney, director of the School And not that they're a high-hat bunch, but of Journalism. formal dinner dance is the way they spell it, and it's to be committed in the Grill Room Announcement will be made in the near of the Morton Hotel. Four hours—from nine future of the competitive scholarships avail­ till one — will be consumed along with the able for the year 1926-27. dinner. Attendance is restricted to members of the club and one guest. The committee— Failure is the exciting force in the drama Leo Walsh, Vincent Stace, and Carl Pet- of life.—^F.j.H. THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 711

THE OPERATIC TRIO never heard better voices than these, nor a A double surprise, and one of generous more finished accompaniment than Mr. St. proportions, was served in Washington Hall Leger's. Miss Maxwell's clear bell-like so­ Monday night when the Chicago Operatic prano has an exquisite texture; the rich Trio appeared in concert. The three singers notes of Lazzari's basso showed fine spun making up the trio are all well known overtones not often heard in a bass; Mr. La- artists of the Chicago Civic Opera: Messrs. mont's tenor is colorful and highly dramatic. Virgilio Lazzari and Forrest Lamont, basso And a word about the personalities of the and tenor respectively, and Miss Margery artists. Singers and their accompanist won Maxwell, soprano; their accompanist, Mr. their audience completely by their charm and Frank St. Leger. The knowledge that the sincerity. They sang and played as if they concert was to be given by such artists, while were thoroughly enjoying themselves. And it raised the expectation of campus music- therein is to be registered surprise Number lovers, also raised a little doubt at the same Two. The group of artists faced its first time as to how such a program as they Notre Dame audience with some misgivings. might arrange would be received; for invar­ Not only were they a little dubious about the iably in college concerts the question arises degree of musical appreciation to be found as to how far the performance may go over in a "he-man's" college, but they had been the heads of their auditors—or rather, how informed that Notre Dame audiences were a far they may go without going over their bit barbarous. At the close of the concert heads. they expressed themselves enthusiastically concerning the highly developed taste, the It was here that surprise Number One alert response, and the warm-hearted good came in. Hardly ever in the history of the manners of their student audience.—CH. PH. student body has a program been more thor­ oughly enjoyed. The "balance" of the pro­ gram was perfect. Opening with a "Mad­ SCHOLARSHIPS AWARDED ame Butterfly" duet, sung by Miss Maxwell Father DeWulf, the chairman of the Fac­ and Mr. Lamont, it embraced in its operatic ulty Committee on Scholarships and Prizes, numbers the "Lament" from "Pagliacci" announces that the Roger C. Sullivan schol­ (Mr. Lamont) a duet from Mozart's "Don arships for 1925-26 are awarded as follows: Giovanni" (Lazzari and Lamont), the "Jewel To Joseph A. Navarre, Jr., of the Senior Song" from "Faust" (Miss Maxwell) and class; to Frank T. Andrews, Jr., of the Ju­ two selections, a trio and a duet, from Ver­ nior class; and to George Cyongeyer, of the di's "Sforza del Destino." In the duet from Sophomore class. These scholarships amount the last named, long a popular tour de force to $250 annually, and checks for that amount of Caruso and Scotti, Messrs, Lazzari and have been sent to each of the three success­ Lamont surprised themselves demonstrating ful candidates. Eleven men made application once more what a glorious piece of vocal to the Committee. The scholarships are music the "Destino" is. awarded to the three men, among those ap­ Besides the operatic selections, some de­ plying, having the highest scholastic aver­ lightfully humorous pieces were given. "Ould age, one award to each class. The scholar­ Doctor McGinn" and "The Little Irish Girl" ships will be again awarded in June to ap­ by Mr. Lamont found joyous response with ply on the year 1926-27. The awarding for the audience, while the Maxwell and Lazzari the current year was delayed by corres­ duet from the old Venetian brought the pondence with the donors. house down completely. Carew's "Love's a Merchant," by Miss Maxwell and a Rossini and Tosti number also were given by Laz­ A fact in the storehouse of memory is zari and as a grand finale the "Faust" finale worth two in the notebook.—W.D.C. of Gounod. Never try to gag a talkative person; he Washington Hall audiences have perhaps will only "chew the rag."—F.J.B. 712 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

"HOYNES NIGHT" CELEBRATED sion in public and permanent commemora­ tion of his illustrious contribution to the up­ "Hoynes Night" was celebrated by the lo­ building of the law school; and, cal College of Law Thursday, March 18. "Whereas, We believe that an annual cel­ A night has been set aside by the lawyers ebration of our admiration, affection, and to be celebrated annually in honor of CoL gratitude toward Col. Hoynes should be held, William Hoynes, the founder and dean em­ mth exercises appropriate to the occasion, at eritus of the college which bears his name. which he shall be the honored guest, and the In conjunction with the celebration an an­ faculty and students of the College of Law nouncement was made of the Hoynes Award, shall have the opportunity to meet him, and a prize of one hundred dollars donated by to show the sentiments we so profoundly en­ the Colonel, to be awarded at each com­ tertain toward him; now, mencement to the graduate in law who has "Therefore, be it resolved, by the faculty achieved highest honors in scholarship, ap­ and students of the college of law, now here plication, deportment and achievement. for the first time assembled to pay honor and The meeting was called to order by Dave reverence to Col. Hoynes, that one night Stanton, president of the Law Club. Dean each year be set apart, preferably in the Thomas F. Konop announced the Hoynes second semester, for a reception to the ven­ award. Rev. George Finnigan, Vice-Presi­ erable founder of the law school, and for dent of the University, introduced Col. such exercises as may be appropriate to be Hoynes. The Dean Emeritus responded with known as "Hojoies Night," and that such a few brief words of thanks and an interest­ amiiversary shall be observed as a perma­ ing talk on the origin and development of nent function in the life of the College of law. The j'^oung barristers greeted their Law.. benefactor with a prolonged ovation. "Further resolved; That a copy of these Col. Hoynes is a veteran of the Civil War; resolutions be furnished to Col. Hoynes, and he saw active duty at the siege of Vicks- to the Notre Dame Laivyer, as well as other burg, and was wounded in this battle. In university publications." 1912, in recognition of Catholic service, he was made a Knight of Saint Gregory by the A SCOOP FOR PAN Pope. He is the only surviving member of The April issue of Pan: Poetry and Youth, the Notre Dame post, G. A. R., which he now in press, will be unique among the founded. He was active dean of the Law year's literary publications. It wiW contain School until 1918. Since that time he has a complete series of new poems hy the fam­ remained at the' University devoting most of ous American poet, Vachel Lindsaj^ "Bab­ his time to study and writing. bit Jambouree" is the title of Mr. Lindsay's Before the meeting adjourned Lewis J. new poems, and the title alone indicates, Murphy, a senior lawyer, speaking on behalf «ven without previous acquaintance with of the faculty and students of the College Lindsay's work, that they are more or less of Law, presented the following resolution jazzy, in spite of the fact that Mr. Lindsay which was unanimously adopted: in the introduction to his recent volume dis­ "Whereas: We recognize the fact that claimed being a "jazz^ poet." Col. William J. Hoynes, the dean emeritus, According to Charles Phillips, editor-in- IS justly entitled to be considered the father chief of Pan, the Lindsay poem.-? will not be and founder of the college of law of the Uni­ published in book form until rext Septem­ versity of Notre Dame and that a proper ber, when the house of Appleton will bring sense of veneration and gratitude for his them out in a volume called "The Candle in loyal services in that behalf, his long and the Cabin." The "first appearance" of a able conduct of the affairs of the college, and poet of Lindsay's fame, who is a regular con­ the pre-eminent virtues of his character and tributor to all the "big" magazines of the career as a lawyer, teacher, patriot, and country, is a real scoop for "Pan of Notre friend of the university, should find expres­ Dame." THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 713

PHILLIPS' NOVEL TO APPEAR SOON board, meaningless at first sight, was thor­ oughly explained. A visit was made to the "Sometime in April" is the time now an­ "prop room" where everything from a canoe nounced by the publishers for the appear­ paddle to a modern parlor set was to be ance of Professor Charles Phillips' new found. The glass crash, and thunder sheet, book, "The Doctor's Wooing." As the title came in for special attention. Mr. Richard­ indicates, and as the curious on the campus son kindly showed how lightning was pro­ now pretty generally know, this new Phillips duced by the border lights. The most sur­ opus is a novel. prising revelation of the visit was the fact "Only a romance" is the author's unpre­ that the stage is about half as deep and twice tentious description of this book; but when as high as most had imagined. quizzed about it, little by little he admits that "romance" in this case means a good Queries were constantly shot at the in­ deal more than moonlight. While he says structors: "Aren't those drops too heavy that "The Doctor's Wooing" is primarily a to be let down by hand?" "How much do love story, the author admits that it has, your acts cost?" "How many men operate likewise, something over three hundred the switchboard ?" It was explained that the pages of red-blooded adventure. The scene Palace has the most modern equipment of of the story is set in the "big woods" of the any theater in this part of the country. Ev­ author's native Wisconsin. The characters ery drop is counter-weighted and can easily include a stern old Polish exile, his daughter" be let down by a child. The switchboard is (popularly known as "the song-bird of the operated by only one man, who works with pines"), a handsome scapegrace, an ugly vil­ absolute safety as the switches are all con­ lain who loves his dog, a "lumber king," a trolled by external levers and there is no gang of strike-breakers, and a young doctor, chance of a shock. The Palace spends about also handsome enough in the he-man style, five thousand dollars a bill on its vaudeville v/ho is beginning his professional career in a alone. Its pictures cost six hundred more. way that literally gives him heart-failure— This means a total weekly expenditure of that is, of the agreeable sort. from nine to twelve thousand dollars for acts, besides the orchestra and overhead. The bilUng sheets of the last few weeks STUDY PALACE STAGE were glanced through. Acts had been sent Professor Kelley's class in dramatic pro­ to many places such as New York, Chicago, duction had the privilege of studying the Fort Wayne, Cleveland, New Orleans and mechanics of the stage at the Palace The­ Toledo. All the big vaudeville houses from ater in South Bend last Monday afternoon. New York to Chicago are on Keith's circuit; Mr. George Gordon, the manager of the Pal­ those from Chicago to San Francisco on the ace, accorded the class this privilege. Orpheum circuit. The Palace is an excep­ The visit was made intensely interesting tion. It is owned by the Oi-pheum Circuit, by the elaborate explanations of Professor but plays Keith vaudeville. Evansville and Kelly and by the willing cooperation of Stage Terra Haute are the only two other houses Manager William Richardson. Mr. Kelly ex­ run in this manner. The same acts which plained the different parts of the "picture play at the Palace in New York play at the frame"—the main curtain, teaser, tormen­ Palace in South Bend. tors, fire curtain, borders, and grand drape. The class then went back stage where Mr. Richardson explained in detail the province Father Cavanaugh, C.S.C, ex-President of of every rope, switch and "prop." Several the University, returned from Cleveland, drops were let down to give the members of recently, where he participated in the wel­ the class a close view. The different kinds of lights, foot, border, flood, spot, and bunch come extended to Archbishop Mooney, Apos­ lamps, were pointed out. The large switch­ tolic Delegate to India. T •'• •[-ri-i rri'VTr''^T" TTi|-'«aa»aMM«iliiaMiifci«»iia» inr.'iT-'-Tff>ii--yr,rn'r^''

714 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC MUSICAL AND THEATRICAL NOTES Conmiittee. The George Barrere Little Sym­ The most successful concert of the year phony will appear in concert on May 12. The was given in Washington Hall, Monday Barrere organization is probably the finest night, March 22. The program was sung by small orchestra in the world and their pro­ the Chicago Operatic trio, composed of Mar­ grams are always most interesting. gery Maxwell, soprano, Virgilio Lazzari, bass, and Forrest Lamont, tenor. The Glee Club gave a concert for the The entire evening was devoted to selec­ student body of St. Mary's in St. Angela's tions from various operas,—solos, duets and Hall on Sunday night, March 14. The reg- trios. From the opening duet from "Mad­ ular program was presented before the audi­ ame Butterflj'-," sung gorgeously by Miss ence, which was most generous in its ap­ Maxwell and Mr. Lamont, to the superb Pris­ plause. Following the concert, refreshments on Scene from "Faust," sung by the three were served. artists, the numbers were tossed off bril­ liantly by the singers, and received with en­ thusiasm bj'- the audience. On Monday night, March 29, the Stephen­ ]\Iiss Maxwell has a beautiful soprano son's will show motion pictures taken on voice, wMch has grown tremendously in their recent trip through various parts of streng-th and power in the last few years. the world. The entertainment will be given She has the personality of the true artist, in Washington Hall at 8 p. m. Following the with just enough naivete to make her seem pictures, any students so wishing can make wholly charming. She was at her best in arrangements for tours of Europe or the the "Jewel Song" from "Faust" which she Orient.—^A.L.M. sang delightfully. Mr. Lazzari has what is possibly the finest voice ever heard in Washington Hall. His LIBRARY VOLUMES MISSING tones are sonorous and well in control, The following volumes are missing from whether he is singing softly or with em­ the Reference Room of the Library: Cam­ phasis. He has poise and good reason for bridge History of English Literature, Vol­ having it. He was particularly fine in his ume VI; Modern Eloquence, Volumes, VIII, duet with Mr. Lamont, taken from "The XI and XII; Larned's History of Ready Force of Destiny." Reference, Volume IV; Baretti's English- Mr. Lamont has a ringing, clear tenor Italian Dictionary, Volume II. voice, with a slight overtone which would The absence of these volumes causes seri­ have been wholly umioticeable in a larger ous inconvenience. Those who have them hall. His is the typical operatic tenor voice are requested to return them to the Library and he displayed it with a taste which was immediately. iinimi)eachable, especially in his aria from 'Tagliacci." The final number, the trio from "Faust" FATHER CRUMLEY'S BOOK OUT was to our way of thinking, the finest num­ "Logic, Deductive and Inductive," a text­ ber of the progi-am. Others seemed to think book for classes in elementary logic, the work so too, for the singers were called back and of Rev. Thomas Crumley, C.S.C., Professor forced to repeat the song. of Philosophy in the University, has just The evening showed one thing conclusive­ been published by the M^cmillan Company, ly: that Notre Dame can and will welcome of New York. Father Crumley, in his intro­ enthusiastically great artists who have duction, states that he has followed closely something to give their audiences. the doctrines of Aristotle and the scholastic philosophers. The book is now on the shelves Another sterling attraction is announced of the Library, and may be obtained there. It for Washington Hall by the Entertainment is also on sale in the bookstore. THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 715

MAIL PLUS was wanted and to hold me until one of their officers arrived. I got out of it all right, by They were in the "caf." phoning the South Bend police." " 'Lo, Joe! D'ye mind if I sit down beside "I had a pretty good idea who it was then. you?" But I didn't tell him. I knew he was going "Um," growled the one addressed. on a trip with the basketball team the night "S'matter, Joe," asked the other, shoving of the Junior Prom. Huh! I faked his hand­ his tray on the table, "Didn't cha get any writing and wrote to his girl inviting her to mail today?" the dance. Of course I signed his name. She "Mail ?" Joe straightened in his chair and wTote a letter of acceptance, and he didn't looked fiercely. "That's just the trouble; I know what it was all about. Too bad she got too much mail. And it looks as if I'm bought a dress for the affair and couldn't go. going to keep right on getting it." I didn't figure on that." "Wadda ya mean too much mail ? Thought "Well, I didn't mind so much when I found you liked to get your letter or so a day." that someone had emptied a fire extinguisher "Why you idiot, I do." Joe was plainly on both sides of my mattress one night getting angiy. "But who wants to have a 'cause it dried the next day. . . . and any­ mountain of it to slide down' on top of him ? way I distributed some peanut shells and soft Circulars, letters, postcards, packages .... fudge under this 'smart-alec's' sheets. But Aw, what's the use? Go over to my room this mail stuff is getting on my nerves. and take a look if you think it's so funny . . . That's carrying it too far. Well, guess I'll Some half-wit, and I'm prettj'- sure I know be going. Gotta get over to that guy's room who it is, has put me on every free mailing and take the light bulbs from it. He's down­ list in the country. Must have spent a year town to a movie. Gotta get him good and a half cutting out coupons and signing though; that's a tame one. Think maybe I'll my name and address to them. Here's a send his picture in to be used as a news­ couple of samples of the latest batch to ar­ paper testimonial for a patent medicine 'ad.' rive. Here, look at this! What interest have Well—s' long, see ya later." I in becoming a fingerprint expert; or taking The listener, with a broad grin on his face a smiimer cruise to the Bahamas; or the new watched "Joe" as he stomped off. "Gosh!" Majestic Underground Garbage Receiver?" he breathed, "that boy is on the war path! "I tell you, I'm going to get even with Hope he never finds out that I did it. I won­ someone for this! I don't mind a little joke, der who that other victim is?"—W.E.CARTES. but, well, what do you think I got yesterday? A bicycle, thirty days free trial! Don't be laughing like an imbecile! This is serious. DUNNE HAS NEW WORK Today an artificial arm salesman was out to Bert V. Dunne, formerly connected with see me. I know who's at the bottom of this, the sports department of the South Bend and I'm going to get him. He'll find out that Neius-Twies, has resigned his position on T don't need any free advice on how to pre­ that paper to take up the management of vent fallen arches." the new Notre Dame Sports Publicity Bu- The other was rolling from his chair. heau. The objective of this bureau is to "Who do you think did it?" he managed to see that only authentic sports news is pub­ gasp. lished concerning the University, and that "Think? I konw who did it. When I get all are given attention and proper publicity. through with him he won't think it's so fun­ ny. Here's how it started. A couple of weeks ago I went off to HUnois on a track No one ever found the stars by looking trip. After my race I was arrested. Found at the clouds.—J.A.W. out when I reached the police station, that somebody had phoned long distance, said Give a man enough rope and he will; they were the South Bend police and said I smoke himself to death.—^P.J.B. 716 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

ANOTHER PAUSE LECTURES ON MEXICO Hang on! There are only five days more! Professor Charles Phillips of the English Most of the exams are over and the profs Department of the University received a tele­ won't work you too hard between now and gram from New York this week requesting next Wednesday noon. It is freely admitted him to attend a conference held there with that great is the temptation to "let go" un­ the Mexican Minister of Education for the til "after Easter." But who will want to discussion of the present church situation work "after Easter?" When you return in Mexico. Although unable to attend on there %\all be campus baseball, campus golf account of illness, Mr. Phillips is this week and, a little later, swimming. It would be lecturing in Chicago on the same subject, best to do that duty before you go home. and on April 11 will again give his Mexi­ While you are telling some one at home can lecture in Cincinnati under the auspices what terrible winters Indiana has and how of the alumni of St. Xavier's College. you hit your pal with a snowball that was During his sojourn in Mexico last sum­ intended for someone else, Notre Dame will mer, where he was sent as a special com­ be taking on new clothes for your return. missioner of the National Catholic Welfare Most of the trees will don leaves and with Conference, Mr. Phillips made a thorough a favorable sun, the magnolias in front of study of the grave problems which now con­ the Main Building will blossom forth to wel­ front the church in the southern republic. come you and the first day of the last lap of the year '25-'26. This return will be en­ tirely different from that of Christmas. BROWNSON LIBRARY GIVEN BOOKS While you are attending some dance in A complete set of Cardinal Newman's the town, or at some other town, the Notre works, the "Life of Newman," by Ward, Dame baseball team will be climbing into a and several of Bishop Spalding's works on Pullman somewhere south of the line estab­ education have recently been added to the lished by the Messrs. Mason and Dixon. Brownson Library in Brownsoon Hall. The And while Jim Silver is sitting in a berth books are the gift of J. H. Heinemann, an telling how a ball almost tore off his thumb, alumnus of the University. the Glee Club will be entertaining some During the seventeen years it has been in New England audience. At the same time, existence, the Brownson Library has grown other, like yourself, will be attending rapidly. Started by Brother Alphonsus, dances. Some of the dances will be those C.S.C, rector of Brownson Hall, this libra­ ^iven by Notre Dame clubs; other dances ry is a collection of the works of distinctive­ will be those given by—^well, just dances. ly Catholic authors, and aims to keep well A hundred or so will remain on the cam­ abreast of the times in the addition of re­ pus. And each of the hundred will wonder cent Catholic literature. where in the world the other ninety-nine The Brownson Library specializes in fic­ -are. The ninety-nine on the campus may tion and biography, and is distinctly useful not be able to sing or to catch curves but in research and reference work in connec­ they would willingly expose themselves to tion with Christian Doctrine and English the perils of bad singing and ungraceful classes. It is for the use of all students of catching to be away from here. When you the University, and allows users to keep two are gone, this is the deadest place in the or three books for a month at a time. The world. The local leftovers would have a patronage of the library among Notre Dame tiance. But who can get any fun out of the men is large, but a large part of this comes Palais when the rest of the fellows are from Brownson Hall men. Brother Al­ gone? phonsus invites and urges residents of other But eveiyone will manage somehow to halls and off-campus men to inspect the live through it. library and choose books for reading. THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 717

. OFFICIAL NOTICE The Culver Academy Literary Day is arousing wide-spread interest, and is spon­ Rev. John O'Hara, C. S. C, Prefect of Re- sored by such men as Meredith Nicholson, hgion, announces that the first mass next George Ade, Kin Hubbard, and other Indiana Sunday, March 28, will be at 6:30 A. M., and literary and artistic lights. Further infor­ the second, at 8:00 A. M. A special mass at mation can be obtained from any one of the 7:45 was previously announced. This ar­ editors of the SCHOLASTIC. rangement has been changed, and students are instructed to attend either the 6:30 mass, or the solemn mass at 8:00 o'clock. JUGGLER GOES INTO BUSINESS The change in time of the second mass froiii The Big Business number of the Juggler S:15 to 8:00 o'clock is for Palm Sunday only. arrived on the campus last Tuesday night to interrupt the student body in its pursuit LITERAPwY DAY ANNOUNCED of the w. k. examinations. This was the Juggler's sixth visit of the year, and it con­ With the objective of stimulating interest clusively proves that the Funny Fellow can in literature and art among the boys and be punctual as well as humorous. ^irls of Indiana, Literary Day was instituted The art work of Larry Culney and iit Culver Military Academy in 1925. So suc­ Charles Campbell is one of the outstanding cessful was this day that its continuance was features of the issue. These two men work decided upon, and the officials of the Acad­ in perfect harmony \vith the veteran McEl- emy now announce the second annual Liter­ roy, whose striking cover adds new laurels ary Day to be held Saturday, May 22, 1926. to his well filled collection. Five contests with prizes are being held be­ The Funny Fellow promises two more vis­ forehand, the winners to be announced on its before June. These are to be the Girl's Literary Day. Number and. the Commencement Number Harry McGuire, '25, of Notre Dame, won and will bring the grand total up to eight, a iirst prize in the George Ade One-Act Play standard never before attained. Contest in 1925; he was the only Notre Dame man to place. The 1926 contests are: Book Illustration Contest, for most meri­ GIVE PASSION PLAY torious illustration of a specified text select­ "The Upper Room," a drama of the Pas­ ed for the purpose of the contest. This con­ sion of Christ, written by Robert Hugh Ben­ test is open to all residents of Indiana under son, was presented by the Freshman PubHc twenty-four years of age who are not pro­ Speaking class of St. Mary's College in St. fessional artists. Angela's Hall last Sunday evening. A group One-Act Play Contest, for the best play, of Notre Dame men witnessed the perform­ •capable of production in 25 to 30 minutes ance. and not requiring lowering of curtain. Mishawaka was accorded an opportunity Short Story Contest, for short stories to see the play presented Saturday evening, from 2500 to 5000 words. Open to all un­ when the cast acted there. More than one dergraduate students of Indiana Colleges. In­ hundred girls took part in the play, which diana setting preferred. was in three acts and two tableaux. Essay Contest, for essays not over 2500 words on any topic or phase of George Rog­ Jim Crowley, the "Sleepy Jim" of the fa­ ers Clark and his capture of Vincennes as a mous Four Horsemen, the backfield of the determining factor in the history of Indiana. National Championship football team of Open to Indiana high school students. 1924, visited the campus recently and added Poetry Contest, for poems on any theme, much to the success of the 1926 Monogram not over thirty lines. Open to students of Club Absurdities by presenting special acts all Indiana high schools and undergraduate at the Friday and Saturday evening produc­ students of aU Indiana colleges. tions. 718 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

THE COLLEGE PARADE formally the things that concern you most? Ten girls at Mills College (Calif.) are ex­ "They have not heard of enforced attend­ perimenting with a plan of self-education. ance. Quizzing and threats of expulsion are During the past five weeks they have been beyond the pale of consideration. Prerequi­ m.eeting without faculty supervision, with­ sites would be their idea of perfect absurdi- out credit, without exams, without every­ lJ^" So writes Frederick H. Lumley from thing but a few self-imposed rules. The the University of Munich, Germany, where group meets twice a month and discusses he is studying on one of the nine scholar­ for an hour under the guidance of two of ships from the American Council of Educa­ its members. Comparative Literature is the tion. Lumlej'^ fomierly attended Ohio State subject. All the girls are expected to do University. "When a student comes to a outside reading for a background but no de­ German school to take chemistry, he takes finite list of books is prescribed. Advice of only chemistry and the allied sciences. Eco­ interested professors was sought in getting nomics or political science would be only the group under way, but the course is main­ an avocation and would not count toward a ly the result of undergraduate initiative. degree. And the degree is measured by knowledge and not by the number of credit hours. The professors are ari§tocrats. When University alumni who have had a few one enters a room the students stamp their j'^ear's experience in business and profession­ feet in wild jubilation," he continued. After al life possess more "social intelligence" a student is once enrolled he receives an than univ€rsity students. This logical con­ identification tag that he must have with clusion seems to be substantiated by a test him at all times, so that his correct name given to alumni by Dr. F. A. Moss, profes­ can be ascertained in case of arrest. sor of psychology at George Washington University. Last fall. Professor Moss de­ Commenting on the appointment of Tom vised a "social intelligence" test designed to Lieb as first assistant football coach, the ascertain one's general amount of social Wisconsin Cardinal says, "Lieb comes to knowledge and ability to mix with others. Wisconsin as a full time coach and adds to The test was given to students of George the department one of the finest young Washington University and it was reported coaches in America. His three years at No­ that Freshmen made a general average of tre Dame have been a series of plugging ninety points out of a possible 160 and that and hard work. While coaching and as first Sophomores, Juniors, and Seniors averaged assistant, he attended school and made his 110. One of the graduates tested made a master's degree. At the same time he taught score of 145, the highest that has been re­ classes in .the agricultural school. Rockne corded in any of the tests. The former high in a statement about Lieb said, 'He is one grade, 138, was made by the son of a United of the most loyal, efficient, and hardworking- States senator. types of young men in the game today. I would like very much to keep him at Notre Dame but the position offered to him at But all is not darkness. Some colleges are Wisconsin has greater possibilities and al­ building up instead of tearing down. Wit­ though we cannot replace him for a couple ness the statements of Mr. Fred Norcross, of years at least, we will not stand in the President of the Greeley, Colorado, Cham­ way of his advancement.' Surely a fine ber of Commerce. "Every business man in tribute from a master coach such as Knute this town ought to get out and root for all Rockne." he's worth for Teacher's College teams. The college is a town's greatest asset; it has done more to put business on a sound, stable If classroom learning is not satisfying basis in Greeley than any other factor." why not meet with a select group of con­ And that, we think, is that! South Bend genial and interested friends and discuss in- has learned this lesson of life.—J.T.C. THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 719

EASTER for the birth of a new life, and not for the The time to cast aside the sackcloth and passing of an irksoome period. to dust off the ashes of the penitential sea­ The lesson, we think, is plain enough for son is at hand. What are we to do about all to read. Discard the sackcloth and ashes, it? but discard them for raiment as purposeful. That question should be pertinent to every Get in tune with Nature, with the freshness, college man. Escape from it it is impossible. the revitalized energy of things that are joy­ He should turn to Nature and to Nature's ously reaching toward heaven. But above God for his answer. all get in tune with God. For in Nature we have, as usual, a paral­ lel to our own case. It is the end of Na­ WELCOME TO SPRING ture's season of penance, too. The birds iire flying North, the grass is showing ten­ We like to think of Spring as a season derly green, the buds are timidly emerging, when the trees push forth timid emerald the sap is flowing in the trees. The iron- buds while around their roots one sees the bound rigidity of Winter is past. Gentle delicate purple of shy pansies and violets. rain takes the place of swirling snow. The music of robins and chickadees and chaf­ Glorious sunshine instead of frosty brilliance finches assails the ear in riotous melody. floods the land. Nature is awakening; the Beautiful maidens in Grecian costume revel vital upward urge is re-emplanted in her o'er the greensward and Editor Denny children; all things are striving for expres­ O'Neill installs two new boxes at the Notre sion. Dame post office to accommodate the Shel- That is Nature's Easter. But Nature's leyan effusions that flow into Pan. God provides us with a better one. What But in this dull age of realism such dreams can be more truly symbolic of the spirit of will fool no one. We, therefore, feel much the time than the Resurrection, "in a burst safer in laying 5 to 1 odds that it will snow- of dazzling light," after the dark and gloomy Sunday. We know full well that it will rain days which preceeded? With Christ's re­ at least three days during the coming week. surrection came a renewal of faith, a dissi­ It is almost metaphysically certain that pation of harassing doubt, a calmness and 10,000 maledictions will be laid on the steadiness of purpose. Rejoicing there was, weather between March 27 and March 31. but it was gladness for the allaying of fear. But it is Spring. All hail! 720 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

Enter Easter! L. R. McINTYRE, '28

F ALL the seasons in the j'^ear, Spring cranny. is the most welcome. It is in the Spring Enter Easter! Enter into the world, our O when soft, hazy clouds promenade on world! Flash upon the screen of life the the azure sky-avenue; when the birds are picture of the struggle triumphant of Him clui*ping; when the grass starts, ya\ATis, and who died and, toppling over the great boul­ emerges from its long ^wnter sleep; when ders that held Him a prisoner,—a perpetual the trees and flowers begin to purchase rai­ one thought the wiseacres of Jerusalem,— ment at nature's department store. The rose again from the dead. Easter, you are the flowers, the new green grass, the twittering telegram He sends us once a year to cheer birds, and the renewed vigor of the trees, it us, to strengthen us in our combat ^^dth the is true, are all very beautiful to behold. But potent forces of life. Easter, you are the what is the real significance of these pre- annual portent from Him who says that like sagers of Spring? Their real significance Ues the proverbial Phoenix, we shall, in the here­ in the fact that they are the advance agents after, rise again from the ashes of our earth­ of Easter. They are the stage hands, the men ly bodies. Enter Easter! Fill our world with behind the scenes, who dress up the stage celestial happiness, though it be only for a for the debut of the main actor; they are, in day! Give us the golden sunshine,—an in­ fact, the heralds who clarion in shrill tones herent part of every Easter, — that melts the approach of Easter. gloom, from a gigantic glacier, to an infinites­ When the harbingers of Spring are viewed imal drop of water in the mighty ocean. Give through our windows we know with certi­ us temporary repose from the constant din tude that Easter is softly rapping at our of this workaday world; the kind of repose doors. that one enjoys while ensconced in a gondola Enter Easter! Enter into our hearts! Stroke listening to the soft swish, swish of the pad­ them with that magic paint-brush of yours dles as they lazily rise and fall, and the that both cleans and covers; the paint that gentle ripplings of the water as the boat oozes from its pliant bristles colors highly, glides through it. Tiptoe, Easter, into the tones down: it radiates the exterior and pen­ sordid tenements of the cities; feed the etrates the interior of our hearts like nitric starved inmates of these tenements \vith the acid through muslin cloth to inundate them life-prolonging foods,—^faith and hope. Steal wdth love, tender love. The magic paint­ past the liveried footmen of cold mansions; brush sketches with the skill of an Angelo, pierce the mansion owners' hearts of ada­ flowers, — tall, \\dllowy, multi-colored, that mant with the poniard of charity. Ascend encompass our hearts; they waft to the nos­ in hotel elevators; place under the door of trils of the heart enthralling, bhssful odors each room of every floor the solution to the of the breath of God. secret of how to remain interested in life. Enter Easter! Enter into our minds! Bat­ Finally, flash your eifulgent rays of faith ter down the gates of grouchiness and des­ through the windows of hospitals and phys­ pair with your reverent, exhilarating music ical and mental sanitariums. of newborn life and newborn joy. Strew the Enter Easter! Enter into our university hardworn streets of our minds with the clean clurricula! Pass your wand of rejuvenation fresh palms of inspiration. Dust out of our over strained eyes, dulled brains, numbed brain-houses the cobwebs,—^permitted to ac­ fingers, threadbare trousers. And let your cumulate and to disfigure during the drab, representative, the Easter Bunny, present confining \vinter,—so that God's omnipotence many things to the nostalgic, perturbed cha­ may occupy without disgust every nook and ser of culture besides the dismissal slip! THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 721

The Silent Warning JOSEPH B. SHANLEY, '29

0 YOU suppose that you and Tony it was half full of water, but he sure is a can work Sunday, Tom? We want glutton for punishment. How much powder "Dt o clear our Novick's room in the did you get, Tony?" fourth west so that we can run the pumps "Four boxes, enough to last till noon." in there and take care of the water he "I hope we don't strike another water line struck. It's a bad hole but we will pay you or we will be swamped. The super had twen- for fifty cars apiece no matter how many tj cars sent up, that ought to keep us busy you get out." for awhile." "I don't know, Charlie. I hate to work in Tony was drilling into the sides of the that hole but I need the money right now; chamber to get a hole for the powder. Tom my wife has been sick and I think Tony was loading the loose rock, lying around the would like a little overtime this next pay floor, into a car. The room they were work­ himself. I'll see what he has to say and if ing in was about twenty feet long and fifteen he wants to work, why I'll stay too. Will wide. The floor was covered with four or the motors run?" five inches of water. The glare of their car­ "No, but the pump crew will be on and bide lights caused grotesque figm-es to form the track boss is going to repair seventh on the wall as they moved about. The silence west." was interrupted by the sound of water drip­ Tom Prescott went back to the place ping from the roof. Occasionally, a mine where his partner, Tony Cavacci, was put­ rat, as large as a small cat, would scamper ting powder into his fifth hole for the next across the room and try to get in their din­ shot. He waited until Tony had attached ner buckets. the fuse and then he asked. A match flared, Tony lighted a cigarette, "Hey, Tony, wanta make a little extra this then resumed his tamping as he finished the pay? The boss just stopped me and wanted sixth hole. to know if we would work Novick's room "The drilling is good in here, Tom, the Sunday. Fifty cars apiece if we do." rock is soft and it's easy to get a hole. Two "Sure, I'll work, but we won't be able to more and we'll blow 'em." get out over thirty ton with all that water "Take your time, we're not on piece work to put out the fuse and wet the powder." now, you know. There's n;o use killing your­ "Yes, but there is only eight inches in self." there now and the room is five foot high so "Let's prop up the left side over there, it won't be so bad and I want those fifty Tom'. I'm afraid it will fall in when we blast. cars." It's sagging a lot now." Sunday morning at six o'clock, Tom met "Where does Novick keep the props? I Tony in the mine office and after they had hope I don't have to go back to the foot for rang in, they started for Novick's room and one. I found one, Tony." the fifty cars. A half hour later and Tony had finished "Dominic had some dance last night, didn't his tenth hole and was ready to blast. • He he, Tony? I hear the gang was pretty well told Tom to get behind a pillar and then he stewed. Were you with them?" removed his carbide lamp from his hat and, "I was there for an hour or so but moving raipdly from one hole to another, he I went home early to get some sleep for to­ ignited the fuses, then hurried to shelter. day. The bunch left about four o'clock." A few seconds later and, boom! the dull "This is a terrible hole. I don't see how sound of powder exploding was heard Novick stands it in here. When he first throughout the room. Smoke filled the room started, the roof was only four feet high and until it was choking the two men working 722 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC there; but the mine fans soon caused the up but as he lifted, his head felt as though smoke to drift away. When it had cleared, it would burst, and he had a queer choking the miners stepped from behind their shel­ sensation in his throat. He realized that it ter and viewed the result. was impossible for him to carry Tony out, "That was a good bunch you drilled that because he was rapidly losing his strength; time. Tony. There must be about five ton but he struck doggedly at the task, knowing loose." that at any minute he might lose conscious­ "Yea, we'll soon have this place big enough ness himself and all chance for aid would to put the whole pump in. It's only eight be shattered. He fought to retain conscious­ o'clock now." ness, but finally fell over, overcome by the They steadily shoveled the broken rock fumes. into nearby cars and having loaded three "Where am I?" Tom asked as he regained went back to eat some lunch. When they consciousness. He was in a white bed and had finished eating and had rested a few several white-costumed figures ewre stand­ minutes, thej'^ returned to work. Tony was ing around him. One of them stepped for­ in the far end of the room, drilling; Tom was ward. near the track shoveling, when he noticed "You are in the General Hospital, and in- a dead mine rat. a few days you will be all right again. Now "Hey, Tony, here is a dead rat; you don't drink this medicine and go back to sleep." suppose you hit a gas pocket, do you?" "How did I get out of the room? Where "Naw, I can't smell anything; probably is Tony?" drowTied or starved to death." "Some of the men repairing the track Tom presently left for some more props at nearby smelled the gas and knowing you the foot and when he returned he noticed were working up there, got the gas masks Tony Ijdng near his drill. As he ran up to and found you right where you had fallen. see what the trouble was, he smelled an odor, They found Tony there too. His lungs are familiar to him, that of escaping gas, the badly burned but he will come around all terror of all miners. right. If you had ben left five minutes more, He stopped down to try to revive Tony but you would have both died." it was impossible. He attempted to pick him

THE SPLENDOR OF THAT DAY Down athwart the chasm of the tomb Lay the softened fingers of a cross; Lilies lay across the lawn in bloom; Fresh from out the ancient bosomed moss. Soldiers played at dice against the dawn, Cursing softly in that hallowed place— When an angel moved across the lawn Softly moved the stone and mused a space. When a glory shone from out the tomb Like to fires burning in the gloom Cutting through the softness of the night Softly in its rush of golden light, Smiling from the tomb He went His way. Glorious was the splendor of that day. —CORNELIUS SHEA, '28 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 72a

On Growing Up BERNARD CAREER, '28

HE story of "Jack and the Beanstalk" that I would be needed that aftemon to help meant only one thing to me when I was with the work. "Really?" she rephed. "Well T little, or more precisely, young; and don't drop the sugar-bowl." I was insulted; that was, "Be a bean-stalk." When four my task was most important—^it was to years old I longed to be eight feet tall; and lead our dog to the new home; and I did 1 have clung to that ambition, in some vague lead him there, although he and I detoured form, all my life. By applying a little fifteen or twenty blocks, chased two cats, psycho-analysis, I have discovered that, at investigated all the alleys, tore my coat, and some, forgotten point in my childhood I failed scratched my face. to see a circus parade on account of the When I entered high school I determined crowd that towered above me; and that that my life would have no more such inci­ failure has left a deep wound in my sub­ dents, for I was surely grown-up. But the conscious mind. Now to coiTect this con­ first week left me a httle doubtful; our dition—or is it a complex?—I need only to doctor, who had vaccinated me a few weeks see a circus parade without peeking under previously, sent a certificate to the high the elbows of some vociferous woman who school with my age stated as seven years— has three children and a dog to hold back I was immediately "the seven-year-old from "them tm'rible monsteers." But I am freshman." In my senior year I became edi­ doomed, doubtless, to remain a neurasthenic, tor of the school paper—to me, an immense for what Zaccheus ever saw a circus parade leap forwai'd—yet I became known to the under any other conditions? faculty as the V. P. E., or vest pocket editor. I was hopeful—children are always hope­ The chmax came at graduation time. I was ful or they would not pull oflf the legs of called ui)on at our banquet for a short talk, fiies and then try to stick them' back on gave it, and received fine aplause. Later again—and since nature seemed slower in I overheard a girl say: "Wasn't that the increasing my stature than college pro­ cutest thing you ever heard ? He looked just fessors are in raising grades, I turned to like a little man." To give me a life-long mechanics for aid. I brought down from the souvenir one teacher wrote in my year-book: attic an old "cobwebby" carpet-stretcher, an "How do you get that way—^ninety-eight instrument surviving the carpet-bagger pe­ pounds with your overcoat on?" riod; I sprawled out on the floor and the Now I am a college "man." Last Sep­ machine was attached to my feet by my tember, when making out my schedule, I little sister. The stretcher gripped the floor asked for all morning classes, saying that and the lever was pulled. But I wouldn't I wished to get a job for the afternoons, and stretch! My head should have been fastened I received a spontaneous "haw-haw!" Jovial to the floor, but the tacks were not long friends at home ask what position I play on enough. the Notre Dame football team; and when After I had entered that century-long 1 enter pool-rooms, the house-men look at me period of life known as grammar-school days, with suspicion, some even muttering, "No 1 felt that I was at last becoming a figure kids allowed!" of some importance. While in the fourth "Be a bean-stalk!' In my case the stalk grade, I proudly announced to the Sister one shows little or no promise, and sometimes morning that my family was moving and I doubt the "bean." 724 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

Rewards of Vengeance

VICTOR L. ZIMMERMAN, '28

BANANA plantation in Central or The next morning another guide started South America is a scene that every out with the party, and Jenssen remained A visitor to these parts makes it a point with Reed. They left him in a happy mood. to see. Some offer merely a. dirty, disorderly "It sure is good to talk to men again," he group of frail native huts, a sight very re­ thought after they had left, "I believe I pulsive to a person reared in a modern city could enjoy life if I had a few good friends with its cleanliness and conveniences. Oth­ out here with me—" ers are neat, clean, and colorful and have His musing was interrupted by a dull an attraction peculiar to themselves. A back­ boom. He started—all attention. The sound ground of beautiful tropical jungle makes was repeated several times in quick succes­ them especially alluring. sion. Such was the plantation of a great Amer­ "Those natives fightin' each other again. ican fruit company near a small coastal town They can't never agree; no government '11 in Honduras. The only thing to disturb the suit 'em all." peacefulness of the scene was a man of mas­ While Reed sat there comfortably smok­ sive build, his face and hair unkempt, his ing a black cigar, little did he suspect that once white pants and shirt a dirty brown, gathered in a little hut, not a quarter of a who stood swearing and cursing a group of mile from him, five big natives were gibber­ sullen but resigned natives. One could not ing in their own tongue. Their talk was cen­ help but pity them. tered upon him—he was the object of their "He's the manager of the farm," the guide hate! But why shouldn't he be? Had he answered the inquiry of one of a party of not once whipped them in a fit of anger? tourists. "He's been here almost three Did he not kick and curse them every day? months now and there's gonna be trouble Yes, their life was becoming unbearable; with the natives if he stays much longer." something had to be done and now their The guide seemed interested and continued: chance had come. "He was third mate on a tramp and General Custado with his army of rebels worked hard to get promoted to captain, but was within ten miles of the farm. The fed­ somehow the company couldn't see it; erals were retreating—surely he would be thought him too hard and hot-headed for glad to rid them of this master, especially the job. So Reed quit the sea and got this as there was plunder to be had. A train- job. He can't stand the natives and anyhow load of fruit had left the farm the day before his place ain't on land. Some spick '11 knife so there would be no train from the coast him soon, but he seems to have 'em pretty for at least five days. Reed and Jenssen well scared now." would be the only white men in the vicinity. That night the party were guests of the They did not fear the guide or wish him manager. They found him crude and rough, harm, but he should not stand in their way. but hospitable. The farm was so far inland They reasoned thus, and correctly. that few tourists undertook the difficult jour­ "So," concluded Zobo, the giant native. ney necessary to reach it, and Reed was glad "tomorrow I myself will go to him and speak of their company. He told them of many to him. He will come. You keep Reed in wild and interesting adventures he had had the camp and in two more days we will be during his years at sea, and how he lived rid of him, then if they punish us we join here with the dissatisfied natives, alone, save Custado. Tomorrow night I will return with when Jenssen, his guide, spent a week or so soldiers." with him. The next morning Reed set out to make THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 725

the rounds of the farm. As he left the house path for which he was searching—^followed he was accosted by half a dozen natives, it for some distance and emerged on the their evil-looking machetes in hand and a track some quarter of a mile from the farm. deadly light in their eyes. There was no There he found the cai-, started it and was mistaking their intention. off. As he sped along the seemingly endless To say that Reed was surprised would be track he had little hope of ever seeing his putting it mildly. But he was calm. His friend again, alive. hand went to his belt and produced his auto­ Red locked all the doors and windows, pro­ matic. He was safe for the moment at least cured another revolver, and settled himself for he knew they had no fireanns and for in a comfortable chair to await nightfall. The this reason he could keep them at a safe dis­ hours dragged. Never had an afternoon tance. He cursed them and ordered them to seemed so long. He was unafraid but never­ their work, but they refused and started to­ theless his mind didn't stray very far from ward him. He fired, and as the foremost the present situation. As he sat there the native fell, the others withdrew to a safe thought suddenly struck him: "Zobo," he distance. thought, "that big lazy good-for-nothing, Reed had made a fatal mistake, and he must have put them up to this!" knew it. He stood there for a moment curs­ The more he considered it, the more con­ ing himself silently, and then returned to the vinced he became of it. Yes, Zobo had many house. grievances against him and undoubtedly "Jenssen," he called as he entered. hated him. Yes, it was he who had aroused "Comin'." them to make this attempt upon his life. A f eAv minutes later Jenssen appeared, on "That Zobo," he said aloud, "I'll get him his face a question. for this if it's the last thing I ever do." "I'm afraid I'm in for a little excitement," It was dark. Reed was growing restless. Reed explained, "I just killed one of them "What 're they waitin' fer? I'll show them good-for-nothing Indians. They're sure gon­ yeller worms—" na tiy an' get me now—it's wi'itten all over He stopped short and Ustened. He had their maps. But I'm safe here for awhile." heard the sound for which he had ben wait­ "Well you kin hardly blame 'em, Reed, ing. It was very faint but he was thankful you brought it on yourself and—" for that—the natives wouldn't notice it (he "What's that got to do with it now, eh? hoped) until it was too late. Tell you what, they probably won't pay He went into an adjoining room and threw much atention to you; go down to the first in the switch controlling the four small Ughts switch and get that motor-car, it's on the that marked the landing field. (They could track and the only one here. When you get not be noticed from the gi'ound.) to T , tell 'em to send a plane here for The moon had risen and cast a faint sil­ me. I'll be waitin' at the field. It should very light over the jungle. He slid out of get here about 10 o'clock tonight. Now get a side window and crept away from the goin'." house—^he knew the exact location of the Jenssen went. Somehow he liked Reed field and headed straight for it. and hated to see the natives get him. He He had not gone fifty yards when his eye knew that it would be futile for Reed to try caught the gleam of a machete behind a to reach the car—^they would cut him down bush. A quick shot was followed by a howl if he dared attempt it. of pain. The knife fell to the ground. Jenssen left through a rear door. Half a As Reed ran along the path he heard the dozen natives were watching him. When he shouts of excited natives. He knew that spoke to them he got only sullen answers. they had not only heard the shot but also He watched his chance, slipped unobserved the roar of the plane, now cii'cling for a into the jungle and picked his way through landing. At last the natives sensed his plan it \Aath difficulty. Finally he came upon the and stalled out in pursuit. 726 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC The plane had already landed when he ar­ obtained a position aboard a steamer and rived at the field. The pilot, hearing the sailed—determined to return in a year or so, j'^ells of the natives, had grasped the situa­ when he would have been forgotten, and tion and was ready to start as soon as Reed even up the score with Zobo. reached the plane. Two years he lived for the moment of his "Close enough," he shouted to Reed who revenge. Finally his ship touched at New was still puffing considerably from his long- Orleans and then headed for Honduras. His run. time was almost at hand. The thought half The soldiers arrived about 15 minutes later. crazed him—^but lo! the pleasure was one he Zobo could not control himself — he raved was never to experience. about the camp for hours — when told of Three days out the ship was caught in a Reed's escape. To the soldiers, however, it violent tropical stomi, A mighty wave en­ made little difference, so long as they got gulfed Reed and carried him into the sea. enough plunder to repay them for their long He had not been satisfied to escape mth his march. life. ... He wanted vengeance. ... He had The next morning Reed left the town. He wanted too much!

The Collegiate Convention JOHN GIBBONS, '26

HOULD we of the twentieth century greeted him was, "Don't try to high hat us." scorn the poor Victorians enmeshed in For all John knew to the contrary a con­ S conventions ? vention was a place where the Democratic Let us consider the not altogether imag­ party assembled for its quadrennial riot. inary case of John and Thomas who entered But John did have sense enough to buy him­ a Western university'- in the year our Lord self a pair of trousers, cuffs 20 inches, three 1924. Thomas was slightly more literate loud neckties, and a year's subscripiton to than the run of college freshmen. He had College Humor. He missed never a bill at read enough boks to know that Aristophanes the local vaudeville house and diligently in- was not a Roman general nor Havelock Ellis coiporated every "gag" into his own conver­ a British premier. Withal he was an affable sation. An unusually retentive memory for youth who took pains not to display his stale vaudeville jokes soon brought him the learning too ostentatiously. Reading of mod­ reputation of being witty. ern magazines and novels had convinced him John in due time became so much like two that, since conventions had been buried with thousand other "Joe Colleges" that you could Queen Victoria, man was free to dress, talk, have sworn they were brothers, or at least and conduct himself pretty much as he cousins. And his popularity was a matter pleased as long as he kept within the bonds of envy for the entire freshman class. Thom­ of common decency. The lad, being gullible, as, although he used Listerine twice a day, acted accordingly. He was, therefore, at a became almost a pariah. And the insidious loss to explain the guffaws that greeted him thing about it was that not even his dearest when he mentioned Bagehot in a casual con­ friends would tell him that he had broken versation at his boarding house. When he the most rigid of all social codes—^the col­ once accomplished a iitot that T^'Tiistler would legiate convention. have been proud of, the response which THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 727

Peter, The Cat ROBERT CAPESIUS, '28.

EOPLE have often heard of "The Lost in the dairy. Honors however must be given Chord," but probably very seldom of to Peter for he used to let a dainty lady-cat P "The Lost Cat," because cats general­ obtain her food before he'd attend to the ly are disliked, especially by men. Yet this first law of nature. Thus life went on article treats solely of a cat that was lost merrily until— once upon a time and found again, under It was a few days before a basketball game unusual circumstances. He is an extraor­ at the University when suddenly Peter, the dinary cat with an above-average cat intel­ cat, was missed. Anxious faces were search­ ligence. To comprehend the value of this ing and inquiring. Rumors were going about animal we have to know of his life-history that the cat had been stolen. Some one had and of the part it played in what made him seen two university students drive up in a famous. Pierce-Arrow. They had stopped and had The cat of which we speak was born, let's begun to pet the beautiful angora which had say about two years ago, at a well-known come their way. It was only presumption girl's school under a desk in the employment that Peter, like most girls do, had fallen for office. His residence at the time was a rather the immaculate white knickers and the golf large wastebasket which contained a copy of sweaters of the two students. Perhaps it the school magazine and the comic section of had been the honeyed words of the college the world's greatest newspaper. If we adopt m^en that had attracted the cat, perhaps just the theory of sociologists and maintain that mere curiosity. As it was, the cat had his- environment influences the character of an appeared and those dear to the animal began offspring, that cat certainly will hold his taking fingerprints and employing private own in life. He grew in beauty as in age or detectives. They even went as far as think­ \dce-versa and was chi-istened "Peter." He, ing of giving a reward—a sum of money— "Peter," also grew up to be smart. As soon mind you, but merely thinking. as his mother had taught him how to keep Not that it is crime to steal a cat; it's his equilibrium at moderate speed, he left the sometimes a favor; but in this particular case employment office and went to the near No­ college boys who would stoop that low and vitiate where his presence was tolerated for kidnap such an animal from a peaceful com­ about six months. If you want to know of munity, were considered the basest members kindness and caressing, ask Peter, for he of society. knows. On festive occasions he would ap­ One week had passed and \sith it particu­ pear, his long hair brushed and brilliant vnth. lar events—a basketball game at the Univer­ the school colors adorning his neck. He even sity and an initiation of the new members of wore the Blue and Gold of the University the Monogram Club. Peter, the Cat, returned close by on the day of the Homecoming —came home to his friends. Tired, sleepy game. On St. Patrick's Day he commem- and nervous was what was left of the cat. orized the Saint, by wearing a large ribbon Collegiate diet certainly does not agree with or green, much to he chagrin of the alien the lower animals as was seen on the cat tramp cats around the place. Whether the that played a part in inter-institutional and easy life was growing dull and tasteless or "monogramatic" acti\ities. A cat's memory v/hether he detested living in company with may be as limited as that of a chemistry stu­ some hundred women, we know not, but Pe­ dent but try to catch the beautiful angora ter left the house that had welcomed him if you are wearing knickers and a mono­ and went to the barn for a crack at a mouse. gram sweatei'. As unpleasant memo­ Success must not have been his for he ap­ ries always remain so in this case Peter, peared for his semi-daily dish of fresh milk the cat, has his "Idea of a University." 728 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

1«u^\ss<^\9^^ SPORT NEWS

\mi;ii^ifS?&s

It's all very well to be able to philosophize to pass up many a promising bit of cage ma­ that the interniural games were brighter terial without mention. and better than ever this year—until some­ In the old days of the dirt floor play an one gets the job of selecting the mythical all- interhall player rated with stunt flyers and campus selections. No one can complain that saxaphone players as insurance risks, but there is a dearth of material from which to the use of the new floor did away with a make the pickings; in fact, the converse is great deal of this and the resultant playing- quite emphatically the truth. was truly the best enjoyed here in many a Scintillating floor play, iron-clad defense, year. Interest in the hall fives was keen and classy coordination marked the weekly per­ they enjoyed some of the response of popu­ formance of the various hall knights in their larity that followed in the wake of the West­ sallies onto the slippery surface. There ern Champions. were forwards who specialized in long shots, In picking these teams no attempt was and those who made under-the-basket addi­ made to pass the plums around the table. tions seem ridiculously easy. There were The positions were given to those who centers, — long anghng centers, short stub­ seemed to be the most constant and efficient by centers — and guards, of all sizes and men in the- league and the fact that they shapes, that covered the floor like water cov­ were from this or that hall was a secondary ers the campus and made the leather bounc­ matter. ing off the backboards as safe as a govern­ There is bound to be some sort of differ­ ment bond. There was, over all, a zip and ence of opinion in regard to these selections. dash that makes the picking of an honor That is merely the aftermath of a great team a ticklish operation. season, and connotes a real interest in When everything is taken into considera­ the inter-mural games. Coaches, players, tion, however, we come across a few who rectors, and fans have been interviewed on stand a little higher than the usual run. The the matter. A thousand and one considera­ galaxy of .flashy performers makes the hon­ tions have entered into the task. The hall or of being selected on any of the quintets quintets have been given over to close scru­ a great one and at the same time forces us tiny in an effort, to ferret" out the best ma- THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 729

terial. It will be noticed that the first team is an aggressive, well balanced machine. It should For the "be a scoring combination. Beyond a doubt, McGary and Nolan were the premier for­ real dope wards of the season. Andrews comes into the center post by virtue of his stellar work. on sporting He was the main spring in the champion­ ship play at all times and stands well to the events read fore in the pivot post. The guards, Mc- BERT V. DUNNE'S Kinney and Buccholz are everj'i;hing that could be asked of a pair of offense smother- articles •ers and have the ability to urge the leather "through the iron doughnut on their own ac­ every day count with startling regularity. In many respects the second team is al­ and Sunday most as good as the first. Not because they in were not good; but rather that the others were just a bit better is true of this assort­ The ment of basketeers. At the forward berth we have two promising satelHtes in the per­ SOUTH BEND sons of Hamilton and Bov. The former is ? great shot and was the leading scorer in the interhall league this season. We have NEWS-TIMES taken the privilege of moving Smith of Preshman to the tip-off post because his 3^ play throughout the j^'ear warrants his selec­ tion on the second team and because he could fill this position as effectively as that of for­ ward. Smith was the one bright spot in the meiv'siJKoes frosh lineup. In regard to Smith we'd like INCOKPOSATEO <—' RSG.CS.rAT. Ot>F. to say: Just watch him. Kirwan and Plum- mer are the choice guards and present a $9 formidable appearance. Both are good per- fomiers and round out the team in fine On Display by- shape. A game between this and the first •combine would be a mighty tight affair and Mr. R. E. McDermond well worth walking a mile to see even if there weren't any Camels at the other end. Varsity Supply Store The caliber of players in interhall play MARCH 3i "this year was a bit above par. Interest in every game was keen and the games were worth watching. To differentiate between the $7 merits of the players has been a hard task. But here they are, folks. The fifteen greatest! i».en:55Koes INCORFOn-ATBO . > RZG.n:S.PAr.OFF. A hundred-dollar bill is like a rare vase: Stores in New York, Brooklyn, Newark and Philadelphia <^ Address for Mail T^reak it and it is gone.—^w.c.D. Orders, iqi Hudson ^, New York City • The highroad to success is not paved; so "be prepared for a puncture.—^W.J.M. 730 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

OUTDOOR TRACK IN OFFING bon from an able field. His brilliant show­ ing indoors leads track critics to predict that A pretentious outdoor track campaign Harrington's work in the spring relay meets which will not be concluded until the early will eclipse many existing records for the weeks of June will be undertaken by the event. Irish cinder knights starting this afternoon. The one mile relay team composed of Jim The first outdoor appearance of the 1926 Stack, Bernie Coughlin, Chet McDonald and season is due to be made this afternoon in Red Lahey will probably run at several of Houston, Texas, when the crack two-mile the relays as will the two mile and medley relay team enters a stiff field of competition relay squads. Feature events will also find at the annual Texas Relays. Tomorrow the Irish athletes trying for honors. same team will run the two-mile event in Definite announcement of the outdoor the Rice Relays which are to be held at schedule has not been made although it is. Austin, Texas. assured that Ohio Wesleyan and Illinois will The Notre Dame two-mile team left early oppose the Irish on Cartier Field in the 1926 Wednesday for the Texas event. Frank opener. May 1. A week later the fleet Iowa Masterson, Scrap Young, Doc Dolmage and scant-clad squad will be at Cartier field. Joe Nulty will carry the Irish colors. After Iowa won the Big Ten indoor championship running at Houston this afternoon they are and has a team that may threaten national lo make the jump to Austin for Saturday's honors. A meet with Michigan State and test. The Irish distance men are rated a the annual Indiana State Meet are also on good chance to cop the two-mile at both car­ the bill although dates have not been set. nivals. Outdoor practice has been delayed pend­ This week's program is only the first of a ing arrival of decent weather conditions but stiff schedule which will be undertaken on Coach Rockne will have his squad out for spring track carnivals, dual and triangular hard work as soon as possible. meets and collegiate championships. On April 17 the Kansas and Ohio Relays SPRING FOOTBALL UNDER WAY will hold the limelight and the Irish will When the first robin club gets in its dead­ have representatives at both meets where ly work, when the campus becomes a fit sub­ they will meet the cream of eastern and ject for the consideration of the Committee western track teams. Coach Rockne will on Canals and Drainage, it's usually as­ divide his entries in the April 17 meets, sumed that Spring is just in the offing; but sending balanced teams to both Lawrence when the call "All Up!" rings out and the and Columbus for the events. formal gardens in front of Sophomore and A week later the celebrated Penn Relays Freshman get their annual massage of are to be held at Franklin Field in Philadel­ cleats, it's a sure sign that Spring has really phia and the Drake Relays will hold the arrived at Notre Dame. ground at Des Moines. These relays have For the- past few days the football as­ attracted such crack entry lists in the past pirants have been plowing up the turf to the few years that they are now recognized as north of the Gym in the opening heat of the the leaders in spring relay events. annual spring practice in which places have Although no definite placing of Irish been made and lost in the past. The Notre tracksters has been yet made it is probable Dame system stresses the early period work­ that Captain Paul Harrington, holder of the out to a greater extent than in most places. world's intercollegiate indoor vaulting title, Learning the fundamentals in the six-week mil compete at the Ohio and Pennsylvania spring session so that the fall practices can events. be spent in perfecting the machine, has been Last year Harrington tied with Norton of a potent factoor in the building of the co­ Georgetown for the Ohio Relays vaulting ordinated attack that has become famous honors at 12 feet six inches and a week from coast to coast as characteristically later he copped the Pennsylvania blue r'b- Notre Dame's. THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 731

A Hickey-Freeman Suit looks newer than it is, and costlier than it was. MAX ADLER COMPANY ON THE CORNER MICHIGAN AND WASHINGTON A Notre Dame Store for Notre Dame Men 732 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

BALL TOSSERS OFF TO DIXIE oppose the squad at Atlanta; then a two- game series with Georgia University at Ath* Next Tuesday, Coaches Walsh and Keo- ens, on Monday and Tuesday. At Macon, gan will take their squad of diamond pas- Mercer will furnish the opposition on the timers to southern climes. The first stop on two succeeding days. The Army will be met the road to Dixie will be made at Bowling at Fort Benning, in the final two games of Green, Kentucky, where Notre Dame meets the trip on Friday and Saturday, April 9' Western Kentucky Normal, April 1. No and 10. doubt Notre Dame will use its best bet in The squad has been somewhat handicap­ the opening game in the pitcher's box, and if ped by the fact that the practice sessions the Normal boys are looking for an easy vic­ have been indoors. The Georgia, teams have tory they are due for a real April fooling. been working out-of-doors now for several Friday and Saturday Georgia Tech will months. The men making up the squad will be definitely selected next Monday. Some of the positions are practically cinched how­ ever. Captain James Silver and "Red" Smith will undoubtedly be on the receiving end of the staff.

K r\

.«r^^^^urope'^36. 5 EVER before haa there been sach a N grreattravel "buy" as thisi Imagine a S6-day "all-expense" tour to England. Hol­ land. Belgrium and France at a cost of only ten dollars a dayl Instead of iustanordlnary vacation at the mountains or sea-shore this summer, why not join our congenial party of college stu­ dents, instructors, alumni and their friends •who willtour Europe? Weekly sailingsfrom j^ontreal, on Canadian Pacific steamships. Free side trip (via Toronto) to Niagara Falls. Opportunity to see eastern Canada. romantJcMontrealandpicturesqueQuebec. Comfortable accommodations and appe- Look tizing meals on board the famous "M" fleet of the Canadian Pacific An American col­ it on the lege dance band with each party. Plenty of deck space for dancing, rest, recreation, dealer's deck games, sports, dramatics. Two-day voyage down the beautiful St. Lawrence. counter Only four daya open sea'to Euroiie. Landing at Liverpool, we visit' Chester and Leamington. By motor to famed English castles, the Shakespeare coantiT. rural Encland.OxfordUnivcrBity.Fourdays in London, visit theHague.Amsterdam and Scheveningen fn Ilolland; Brussels, Bruges. Zeebrugge, Ostend and other points in Belgium. By train through the batUeflelds to Paris, where we spend a week, with trips to Versailles and the American battla sector. Ample time for individaal sight-see­ ing and Bhoppinff. Return sailing from Cherbourg. Shorter tours if desired, S260 and $330. Extensions to Switzer­ land, Germany and Italy at moderate cost. Tour management arranges all details and personally conducts party. WRIGLEYiS CRAPisGtnrD CdOe^ra ntxns i

Vi= THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 733

.• 8

r»

Caber Checks—the lively style college men like

rPHEY'RE glen plaids-a lot like Glenn Urquharts; full of lively Highland color­ ings; rich Scotch shadings. Every suit is tailored in the finest way—got all the newest style ideas, the look and taste of London. $50 and others $35 to $65 Sam'l Spiro & Co. The Home of Hart ScJiaffner & Marx Stylish Clothes. 734 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

NYIKOS NAMED CAGE PILOT Johnny Nyikos, star center on the 1925-26 Miller-Mueller Irish cage outfit, was named captain of next Oliver Hotel Shop year's five at the annual basketball banquet 103 North Main St. which was held last Sun­ day night. Nyikos will succeed Vince McNally, skipper of the Spring Suits and Topcoats victorious quintet which Custom tailored in every detail won 19 games out of a from the newest woolens twenty-game schedule. Mc­ Nally and Nyikos were $48 to $65 nominated for the post but Made-to-measure suits and topcoats McNally declined and the honor was accorded to the $55 to $90 popular center unanimous­ NYIKOS ly. The banquet was the last official act of Ben Wade l^ipes the greatest cage quintet that has represent­ ed Notre Dame and the outstanding basket­ ball team of the middle west during the sea­ Imported and Domestic son which just closed. Men's Wear Members of the varsity squad, coaches, officers of the University and members of the freshman squad, were present at the festivities. Speeches, which always creep into cele­ $5.50 COMMUTATION ^^QQ brations of this nature, were on the bill. TICKETS ^l^sB^ik^lKa^ S Following these, the election of Nyikos to the captaincy took place. Of the regular squad only three will be D n D lost through graduation. These are Clem Crowe, Mike Nyikos, and Ted Ley. McNal­ Tickets bought at the Cafeteria ly, Nyikos, Conroy and Dahman, all regu­ lar members of this year's five are to return are good at any of the down­ in addition to a crack reserve team and town locations many promising Freshmen.

D D n COMPLETE LINE OF Bill Doak's Gloves FOR RIGHT OR LEFT HAND O. A. Clark Lunch Rooms U2 W. WASHINGTON AVENUE IM-IN N. mCmGAN STREET Sisler First Baseman Mitt 221 SOUTH MICHIGAN STREET FOR RIGHT OR LEFT HAND 237 SOUTH UCHIGAH STREET »»-Ul W. JEFFERSON BLVH) 1*7 E. WASHINGTON AVENUE Berman's Sporting Store 221 WEST SOUTH STREET 126 NORTH MICHIGAN STREET THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 735

1001 Lyons Hall, bunch even though all of you aren't as old March 26, 1926. as Tex Rickard. I don't know what to think about the hefty DEAR FOOTBALLERS: Ime that's in prospect. It might turn out The papers say that you are out for work to be a tissue paper event after all. When and after looking over the rough turf of the diplodocusses like Joe Boland, Frank Mayer Wise Fool Quadrangle it seems that for and John Polisky can make a place on it, it once the papers didn't make a mistake. must be a pink tea circle. Why, any of you After hearing some of the words that flew that went over to Washington Hall the other about Father Stack's commons last Friday night could see that they are a bunch of it seems that about a hundred of you wish­ would-be athletes who are trying to star on ed that you hadn't wasted so much shoe the boards. Imagine a bunch of supposed leather in following that w. k. slogan "I'd hard guys kicking their ankles over the foot walk a mile for a Camel" but it comes once lights and dropping their eastern "r's" and in eveiy lifetime so you ought to be satisfied. making all their sentences end in poetry. It All kidding aside, it's good to see you isn't doing right by little Nell to let those huskies out there chasing the apple around fellows make a football team. Someone and by the time May 1 rolls around another ought to do something about it. champion should have been started well on Sincerely, its way up the path. You look like a tough TOM CAMPUS. TOWER'S COLLEGE COATS SNAPPYSERVICEABLE WATERPROOFS Gil the^o yyith Colle>^e men o

(YELLOW OR OLIVE) Sport Coats ^YELLOW OR OLIve>

AJ-TOWEROD. BOSTON a ivi A s s a 3as 736 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

THE SAFETY VALVE Send Your Laundry Home Dear E. S. B.: Last Aveek blossomed out that artistic triumph, IN A the "Absurdities of 1926" by the Monogram Club. And so on Saturday night as t. d. was about to gi-apple with ideas President Matthew Walsh, and "KWIK-PAK" Eev. J. Hugh O'Donnell, of the Department of Wel­ LAUNDRY CASE fare, asked, "Are you going to the show?" We were not. Well, after they razzed some about not appreciating the boys' absurdities of 1926, t. d. went and sat near the rear door with Mr. Phillips, Light canvas covered laundry cases and naturally there followed some precurtain talk v^rhich can be sent, inexpensively, by on world literature, Mr. Ward Leahy's thesis and Dante. Parcel Post, A treasure for the stu­ On with the show. Some show, as they say. dent who likes his clothes home- And we had our modest doubts which number we liked best until Father Thomas A. Lahey came washed and home-mended. along and formed our conscience for us. "The Monogram Opening Chorus was the most signifi­ cant," he said, just like one who has discovered a $1.95 to $2.25 new planet. Father Lahey is the sole author of DAYLIGHT BASEMENT LUGGAGE SHOP "The Morals of Newspaper Making," it should be said here. However, to be fair to everybody, as they say, t. d. rather favored Mr. John McManmon's "Put­ GEORGE WYMAN ting it Over." Mr. John is a whale for perseverance, and beats the Ancient Mariner at his own game & COMPANY Mr. Joseph Boland made a big bid for first honors defending N. D. a Lacu against her defamers and quite won the hearts of the law and order ele­ /T ments. We saw our good friend Mr. Joe Prelli do his bit with Mr. O'Boyle, but didn't hear him sing Two good places to eat—at home "White Rose" having ijreviously listened to his can- tation of "La Paloma." Enough is plenty. Petite and at Miss McNally seemed to have had all kinds of trouble keeping her skirts over her knees, which is not so surprising in these daring days when Smith's Cafeteria brevity is the soul of mdth. Miss Johanna Mc- MuUen was a noble squaw,—^large and wholesome and well able to take care of all the little papooses. The House of Quality "The Ballet of the Buns" featuring Miss Violet Ray Dahman as the chief offender found a respon­ 111 EAST JEFFERSON BLVD. sive echo in every heart, as they say. The brashy way in which Miss Violet tossed out perfectly good buns to the bun-eaters was a caution. The local Breakfast, lunch or dinner—come any meal­ time and you will find foods cooked and served bakery department must have turned jjale at the in such a manner that even the most discrimin­ v\ald and rhythmic distribution. It should be ob­ ating taste is satisfied. We buy foods of the served in perfect frankness that Miss Violet Ray finest quality; then get the best available chefs made no attempt to cover her knees, as the same —each one a specialist in some branch of cookery—^to bake or broil or prepare salads. would have been as useless as turning a garden That's why all our foods are good .... hose on Vesuvius. Miss Violet's limbs are legs. There's no tedious waiting here, always a We cannot, of course, give honorable mention to table in congenial surroundings. every person in the cast who expects it, and will be gnashing his teeth that he doesn't get it. We No Charge for a Second Cup oj have tried to pick out what probably escaped the crowd who went to laugh and not to be instructed Tea or Coffee and improved. "The Absurdities" is a grand Lenten We Do All Our Own Baking show. It tones one's temper, or tempers one's tone. Or which is it? THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC 787

ONE MAN TELLS ANOTHER'

When a ACooc/l uie; Feminine Gift is in Order

Just step inside Wyman's south door and ask for a pair of Jo-don Hosiery—silk-to-the- top chiffon. The saleswomen will advise you as to color, and each pair is packed in an at­ tractive box, all ready to give. §2 pair. (That's simplified shopjnng!)

GEORGE WYMAN & COMPANY

SMART STYLED CLOTHES FOR CDUECE niH /7= $550 COMMUTATION ^^QQ A "good line" will go farther TICKETS than ever if you wear D D D Braebums. —the most st\^lish clothes that Tickets bought at the Cafeteria are made especially for are good at any of the down­ the college man. town locations PRICE $a7.50 ana 37 O. A. Clark Lunch Rooms r.lLBERT'S m W. WASHINGTON AVENUE 104-lM N. BOCHIGAN STREET ^^-*" MEN'S OUTFITTERS ^^ 222 SOUTH MICHIGAN STREET S37 SOUTH MICHIGAN STREET 813 SOUTH MICHIGAN STREET 119-121 W. JEFFERSON BLVD 107 E. WASHINGTON AVENUE 321 WEST SOUTH STREET OPEN EVENINGS 738 THE NOTRE DAME SCHOLASTIC

Hickey-Freeman Customized Clothes The Sports Suit Hickey-Freeman sports clothes this season are in beautiful soft fabrics. They are tailored to give the strength so necessary, the freedom of movement so desired, and the easy comfort so important to the enjoyment of sports clothes. Practically all of them are in imported fabrics. Any one of the Hickey-Freeman Sports Suits we are showing today will make a fine addition to your wardrobe. MAX ADLER COM P A N Y ON THE CORNER : MICHIGAN AND WASHINGTON