Compassion Changes Everything

Ello’s Paul Budnitz • Brooklyn Zen • 5 Buddhist Slogans for the Office • Buddha’s Birds

sBuddhisthambhala wisdom for our time sunjanuary 2015

If you want to be unhappy, think of yourself. If you want to be happy, think of others.

— Sakyong Mipham Rinpoche Compassion Changes Everything

5 Baby Steps to Kindness Judy Lief’s tips to develop more compassion

Everyone Is Your Guest How to be a bodhisattva

No Boundary Why love and emptiness work together

Radical Compassion 4 activists working for a better world How to Train the Heart Thupten Jinpa, the developer of Stanford Compassion Training, on proven techniques to help us deepen and expand our natural kindness.

eople usually think that compassion is something you’re born with or not. She is a caring person, he is not—it’s just who you are. But Buddhism (which recognizes no fixed identity anyway) views it differently, and Western science is Pbeginning to as well. Buddhism and cutting-edge science see compassion, empathy, and cooperation as an inherent part of who we are as human beings—maybe who we really are. And scientists are discovering something Buddhists have known for thousands of years: that with the right techniques, our natural compassion can be cultivated, deepened, and expanded. None of us has a fixed allotment of love—in fact our love is unlimited. No one has done more to promote the important truth that compassion is both natural and can be cultivated than the extraordinary Thupten Jinpa. Best known as the principal translator for His Holiness the Dalai Lama, he is a former monk with the highest philo- sophical degree in Tibetan Buddhism. As chairman of the Mind and Life Institute, he is at the center of the rich conversation between Western science and Buddhism. In association with The Center for Compassion and Altruism Research and Education (CCARE), Thupten Jinpa developed Stanford Compassion Training, an eight-week program adapt- ing traditional Buddhist techniques for the twenty-first century. It offers us all a path to a more compassionate life and world. —Melvin McLeod

What is the traditional Buddhist approach to compassion? Historically, cultivating compassion has been a major focus in the Buddhist tradition. Meditation as a mental training is common to all the Indian spiritual traditions. Where Buddhism is different is in its systematic techniques to cultivate our compassionate side. In the Metta Sutta, the Buddha beautifully tells his disciples that just as a mother feels a natural, unconditional love for her child, so should we cultivate that sentiment toward all beings without any exception, whether they are near or far, friends or enemies. That state- ment by the Buddha has served as the basis for a long tradition of cultivating compassion. / ater In Tibetan Buddhism, cultivating compassion is not done simply through closing your o shelter

“The first step is to acknowledge the compassionate side of our nature. t eyes and doing silent practice. The Tibetan tradition also uses the power of myth to It’s telling a different story about who we are as human beings.” inspire compassion. Avalokiteshvara, the thousand-armed Buddha of Compassion, per- sonifies the enlightened, perfected state of compassion. When compassion transcends all Y o © M arthanna

t boundaries, when it is effortless, when it is one’s very mode of being, that is personified by h o P o . c o m / ph M ira the Buddha of Compassion. This kind of mythology speaks powerfully to the devout.

60 SHAMBHALA SUN january 2015 SHAMBHALA SUN january 2015 61 aware of the power of kindness and compassion in our every- In the second week, we begin the actual compassion day lives is really the first step. Then you begin to appreciate the training. In the traditional sequence, we start with The Charter for Compassion value of compassion at a visceral level, not just intellectually. compassion for ourselves, and then extend that out to Karen Armstrong’s inspiring call for Once that kind of perspective arises, you can start working loved ones, and then to strangers, and enemies, and so with yourself. Sometimes people coming from the Buddhist on. But in this training, we begin by focusing on our a more compassionate global community side tend to see meditation as the answer for everything, but loved ones. One of the things that I have been quite silent sitting practice is just one part of what one could call a surprised by is how challenging self-compassion is for The principle of compassion lies at the heart of all contemplative approach to life. There is the other part, in which people in the West. So we switched the sequence and religious, ethical, and spiritual traditions, calling us always to you bring this awareness into your day-to-day interaction with start with compassion for a loved one, because people treat all others as we wish to be treated ourselves. Compassion others and begin to reframe the way you relate to the world. find that easier than compassion for themselves. impels us to work tirelessly to alleviate the For example, if you normally relate to someone in a negative The idea is that we all experience a natural feeling suffering of our fellow creatures, to way, you try to see how you can reframe your relationship in of affection for our loved ones—our children, our dethrone ourselves from the center of our a compassionate way. Normally, compassion arises only as a spouse, our friends, our aging parents, and even world and put another there, and to ph o sentiment in reaction to a situation—the sight of suffering, of strangers who are in pain. We are all capable of that, honor the inviolable sanctity of every sin- t someone in pain or crying. What the Buddhist tradition sug- o by christ because we are naturally empathetic creatures. The gle human being, treating everybody, gests is that you could actually make compassion your stand- practice here is to pay conscious attention to this without exception, with absolute justice, point, the perspective from which you relate to the world. Com- feeling, to evoke it, so it reminds us that this is a equity, and respect. passion becomes part of your intention of being in the world, o pher michel natural quality we possess. This is the second week. It is also necessary in both public and and in this way you start making it real. In the third and fourth weeks, we focus on self- private life to refrain consistently and compassion. We felt we needed to devote two full Karen Armstrong empathically from inflicting pain. To act Tell us about the compassion training program you have de- weeks of the program to this. The first part focuses or speak violently out of spite, chauvin- veloped at Stanford, which makes these principles available on self-acceptance, self-forgiveness, and being at ease Thupten Jinpa: Buddhist scholar, translator for the Dalai Lama, and scientist ism, or self-interest, to impoverish, exploit or deny basic of the heart and mind. to everyone who wants more compassion in their lives, not with oneself—those kinds of things. In the second rights to anybody, and to incite hatred by denigrating just Buddhists. week of self-compassion practice, we focus on learning others—even our enemies—is a denial of our common The basic premise of Stanford Compassion Training is fairly to be comfortable with the aspiration for one’s own humanity. We acknowledge that we have failed to live com- That is the ideal. How, step by step, do we get there? simple. It is based on the premise that compassion is an impor- happiness, because a lot of people in the West have a passionately and that some have even increased the sum of The first step is to have a deep conviction that compassion is a tant part of our fundamental nature. Then, by becoming more problem with this. They don’t seem to be able to dis- human misery in the name of religion. very important part of our nature. This is particularly important aware of and connecting with our inherent compassion, we can tinguish between genuine self-concern and narcissistic We therefore call upon all men and women to restore for people in the West today, who are conditioned to believe that learn to relate to ourselves, others, and the world around us self-absorption, and this is a very critical distinction. compassion to the center of morality and religion; to return the ultimate motivation driving all of our behavior is self-interest. from that side of our nature. In subsequent weeks, we expand our compassion to the ancient principle that any interpretation of scripture to include more and more people, and ultimately all that breeds violence, hatred, or disdain is illegitimate; to Which is in fact celebrated in this culture. Which is basically the Buddhist approach you just described. beings. We recognize the interdependence of self and ensure that youth are given accurate and respectful infor- Exactly. In the West we’re kind of going against the current Exactly. Then the question was, how do we design a program others and see how much our happiness is dependent mation about other traditions, religions, and cultures; to when we talk about compassion. But on the other hand, science that it is truly universal, that does not presuppose a Buddhist on others—how many people contributed so we encourage a positive appreciation of cultural and religious is increasingly telling us that while the pursuit of self-interest is metaphysic or cultural assumptions. That was the challenge. could enjoy a simple meal. We extend our compassion diversity; and to cultivate an informed empathy with the suf- a powerful drive, the instinct for nurturing, caring, and connec- What we came up with was an eight-week program with six to all of them. fering of all human beings—even those regarded as enemies. tion is equally powerful. From both a Buddhist and scientific steps. In the first week, we focus on the basic skills of calming Finally, the participants train in what we call active We urgently need to make compassion a clear, luminous, point of view, we are complex creatures who have both of these the mind and learning to focus, because any form of contem- compassion. This is drawn from the Buddhist practice and dynamic force in our polarized world. Rooted in a powerful drives. plative practice requires the ability to calm, focus, and apply the of tonglen, in which we mentally take in others’ suf- principled determination to transcend selfishness, compas- So the first step is to acknowledge and embrace the caring and mind. We want people to develop some ability to gather their fering and offer them our happiness. We are trying to sion can break down political, dogmatic, ideological, and compassionate part of our nature, and to celebrate it. Basically, thoughts, calm themselves down, deregulate from whatever prime ourselves so the sentiments we have cultivated religious boundaries. Born of our deep interdependence, the first step is telling a different story about who we are as hu- emotional states they are experiencing, and learn to apply their can actually manifest in action. man beings. mind to a chosen topic. Then, throughout the eight-week program, the stu- compassion is essential to human relationships and to a ful- Once you have changed your perspective in this way, you begin An important part of the practice at this initial stage is becom- dents do a number of what we call informal practices. filled humanity. It is the path to enlightenment, and indis- to notice a lot more things that express the compassionate side ing more aware of our intention. How can we bring conscious These are drawn from the mind training principle that pensable to the creation of a just economy and a peaceful ♦ of our nature. You begin to see how often people are sponta- intention into our life? This is taken from the Tibetan lojong, or whatever you encounter in life, you can bring it into global community. neously kind, even toward strangers. You see how the sight of mind training, tradition. We check our altruistic intention or your practice. So whatever the focus happens to be for To join the more than 100,000 people who have signed the Charter for Com- someone else doing a kind act inspires and elevates you. motivation at the beginning, and dedicate the benefit to others that particular week, we encourage the participants to passion, go to www.charterforcompassion.org. Normally we don’t notice these things, and so becoming more at the end. These can frame our session, our day, or our life. use their everyday experience to bring it out. ♦

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