“Lies! Lies! All of It, Lies!” Spring 2006 JHS Class of 1972 Thirderly Issue No. 12 On-Line Newsletter

Welcome to this, the twelfth newsletter of the Jericho High Official Propaganda Tool of Jericho High School’s Class of ’72 School class of 1972 and friends. In this issue: Save This Date! Reunion Update: Reunion in 1 3-D to be held on 10-6-07 October 2007 Catch Up With … Donna Flynn 2 Kordecki and Rich Sun Mon Tues Wed Thurs Fri Sat Kordecki

Checking In With the Classes 3 1 2 3 4 5 6 of 1971 and 1973: Jon Go to Post Friedman, Janet Rhoads Office Leslie, and Pat Franklin 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 Jung Bingo First Person Singular: 5 Benita Zahn Stulmaker 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 Wash hair And Now, for the Youngshturs: 8 Progeny of Linda Caputo 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 Friedmann and Randy San Antonio Bingo 28 29 30 31 Things-to-do list for November — Cartoons by Dan Clurman 10 inventory paperclip collection!!! Dry hair Book review thirty-five years 12 too late: The Underground Guide to the College of You Got Anything Better to Do on 10-6-07? Your Choice — How Did Your School Measure THE 35-YEAR REUNION IN 3-D, FEA- equipment rather than having it deliv- Up? turing the classes of 1972, 1973, and ered, we’re able to keep admission to 1971, will be held at Jericho’s Milleridge $110 per adult ($125 for late payers) Public Service Announcement 19 Cottage on Saturday, October 6, 2007, and $60 per child under twelve — the

Faculty Lounge: 20 beginning at 1 P.M. same as for our 30th reunion and our Mr. Herbert Kramer We’d originally set a date of Sep- communal 50th birthday party. If some- tember 29, but some young couple beat thing comes up last minute and you “Seasons”: Original fiction by 22 us to it and booked the joint for their can’t make it, you can get a full refund Arlene Brimer Mailing wedding. But the deposit has been up until two weeks before the party.

Your Back Pages: 1962–63 29 made, and the October 6 date — Colum- We’d like to welcome four newcom- bus Day Weekend — is firm. For more ers to the reunion committee: Beth

We hope that you will contribute information about the big party, you can Fischer Gemmill and Cathy Morway news about you and yours to always go to the Senior Lounge section Bloomberg, from the class of ‘73; and future issues. You can find all of our Web site. There you’ll find infor- Janet Rhoads Leslie and Lorraine Trig- issues of the newsletter on our mation on the menu, airfares, and a giani Grant, from ‘71. They join ‘72 stal- official Web site, at http://www. jhs1972.net. Best wishes to the breakdown of the price. Because we do warts Ilene Pincus, Larry Licht, Linda JHS class of 1972! much of the work ourselves, from print- Caputo, and Philip Bashe. ing the invitations to picking up Continued on page 28

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Apparently not a single memorable thing happened to even one member of the class of 1972, 1973, or 1971 the last three months. Nada, zilch, zero. Here’s hoping the next three months are more exciting No and that you’ll have some nooz for us next issue.

Catch Up With … Donna Flynn and Rich Kordecki

When we did the “Love, Jericho Style” cover story in issue No. 4 two years ago, we somehow overlooked another intra-Jericho marriage, this one between our class's Donna Flynn and Richard Kordecki from the class of 1973. The couple have been married for twenty-four years and have lived in Suntree, Florida, since 1996 with their three sons.

How They Met for Northrop Grumman as weather, because it’s so a logistics engineer on the hot sometimes. And, well, Richie and I both grew up EC2 plane, the one with it’s not New York, you in White Birch. I knew him the big radar. In the mid- know what I mean? The when we were both little 1990s, he took a job trans- schools are lousy, the kids. He was friends with fer down here; the com- medical is lousy. But it’s my brother, Richard, who pany has a big facility nice. I had a nice new also is one year younger. down here, in Melbourne. house built, and if we were We didn’t date or anything Suntree is a little area in back on Long Island, I’d like that in high school, Melbourne, right by the have to work. Here I can we just used to hang out Kennedy Space Center. stay home and raise our together. I like Florida. Richie boys. In the late 1970s, a hates it. He hates the Continued on page 28 bunch of us from Jericho rented a house together in Donna Levittown: me, my brother, and Rich Tommy Navarra [‘72], Kordecki Frankie Bovino [‘73, and and, the cousin of our class’s below, Dino Patelis], and Richie. sons We were just friends still at Mikey, that point. Then around Billy, and 1980 we started going out, A.J. and we waited a couple of Donna and Rich years to get married. have known each other from the time The Move to Florida they were little, We lived in Amityville, growing up in Bethpage, and Plainview, White Birch. then out to Suffolk County for a while. Richie works

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Your 1¢ Your 1¢ (used to be 2¢, but if you Roll Call: Checking In With (used to be 2¢, but if you factor in inflation …) factor in inflation …) The Classes of 1971 and 1973 The Class of ‘71 The Class of ‘73 Sounds Off About Since we’ll all be getting together again at next year’s joint 35-year Sounds Off About Our Joint Reunion reunion, we thought we’d reacquaint everyone by profiling several Our Joint Reunion members of the classes of 1971 and 1973 in each issue. I would be inter- We all have our own definitions of success. It could be our fami- It sounds like a ested in attending lies, our careers, or winning the award for Most Back Hair at the great idea and a lot the joint reunion in county fair. Just still being here after fifty-plus years is an accom- of fun. — Laurie September '07. plishment in itself. Everyone’s life is uniquely interesting. If you’d like Ross Schneider Thank you for your to share your story in a future issue, please get in touch; we’d love to efforts. — Leslie hear from you and about you. Great news about Glassman the reunion. Was at Jonathan those he interviews, suggesting the ’73 reunion Thanks for your Friedman that he understands that he three years ago and work on the news- writes for his readers, not his had a great time. letter. It’s fun and (‘73) subjects.” Over the years, those — Robert Kanowitz brings some blasts interview subjects have included from the past. I Journalist Jon authors John Updike and Nick Thanks for working would be interested Friedman’s ca- Hornby, musicians Graham Nash on the reunion. I in the reunion. — reer has taken and Robbie Robertson, and for- can't wait to see Laurie Bieg Miller him from USA mer New York Knicks stars Earl everyone! — Lynn Today, to Investor's Business Monroe and Walt Frazier. Balaban Chapkin Yes! I would love to Daily, to BusinessWeek, to “I jokingly asked Clyde how join this reunion. Bloomberg News, and for the his Knicks would have compared Idea for joint reun- Thanks for organiz- past seven years, the online site to the Michael Jordan–era Chi- ion among the ing this. — Lorraine Marketwatch. To categorize him cago Bulls,” he recalls. “Rather three classes is a Triggiani Grant as a business report-er, though, than laugh it off, Frazier thought great one. — Marc doesn’t do justice to the scope of for a second and said seriously, Sacks For this I would his work. Although he’s covered ‘We'd have given them a game.’ make an exception Wall Street extensively, Jon uses No wonder his competitive fire Thanks for the and traverse the the business world as a spring- led the Knicks to two titles. newsletter; I en- Belt Parkway. — board to explore everything from “The only time in my career joyed reading it! I Steven Hirschberg pop culture to his current beat, that I was ever nervous was wonder if anyone is the media. when I interviewed Robbie living in the Ra- Yes, I would be in- Jon writes three Web col- Continued on page 4 leigh, NC, area be- terested in attend- umns per week (Mondays, sides me and ing and would even Wednesdays, and Fridays) on the Michael James. It is try to get my media. No less a journalism fig- becoming the NY/ brother from the ure than Ken Auletta, the media NJ of the South. — class of ‘72 to writer for the New Yorker, Paula Doherty Cox come up from praised Jon in a profile that re- Florida to attend. — cently appeared in PR Week. Count me in. I Joe Friedlander, MD “Jon works harder than most missed the last reporters and bares none of the reunion and won’t arrogance that usually emotes I will be interested. Jon Friedman at the Magazine do that again. — — Jon Gmora from a media cop,” said Auletta. Steven Kabatsky “He has the humility to listen, yet Publishers of America Media- BASH 2005 with Sandy Drayton Cont’d on page 4 he also sometimes displays Cont’d on page 4 sharp opinions and is critical of of Entertainment Weekly.

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Class of ‘71 Sounds Checking In with the Janet Class of ‘73 Sounds Off on the Idea of Our Rhoads Off on the Idea of Classes of ‘71 and ‘73 Our Joint Reunion Joint Reunion Leslie (’71) Continued from page 3 Cont’d from page 3 Janet Rhoads Cont’d from page 3 Robertson of the Band. He could- Leslie doesn’t Sure I'd be inter- n't have been nicer, but I was so need to attend Thank you for taking ested. I attended the starstruck that I melted into an next year’s re- the lead on such a class of ‘72’s get- imitation of Saturday Night Live’s union to stay connected to fun event. together a few years Chris Farley interviewing Paul friends and teachers from Jeri- — Vicki Monaco ago and thoroughly McCartney on ‘The Chris Farley cho — though, for the record, she Robbin enjoyed myself. Show’ (’Um, remember when you plans to. In fact, she doesn’t — Doug Chandler were in ... the Beatles?’). have much choice now that she We now live in Min- “I interviewed actor Geoffrey has been conscripted into the nesota! See you in I would be inter- Rush a few weeks after Shine reunion committee. ‘07. — Meryl Gruber ested. — Scott Singer came out and told him I was sure "The friends I have from Jeri- he'd win the Oscar for Best Actor. cho are closer to me than other Thank you so-o I would love to join He was pessimistic and thought people," reflects Janet, who lives much. You guys are the rest of you guys that Tom Cruise or Woody in Mount Sinai. "Friends that you doing a wonderful job and gals at this Harrelson would get it. ‘When grew up with are different than trying to keep every- event. Let me know you win,’ I told him, ‘I want you to other friends. They knew you one together. 2007 the plans. thank your agent, your mother, when, and they know your history should be a lot of — Rick Morrison and me!’ It's a deal, he said — and all the stories. My Jericho fun!!! — Laura but he must've forgotten.” friends remind me who I truly am Sheftman Strafer I think it is great that Jon credits his Jericho pal — way down beneath the layers you are doing this and Michael Dinhofer with encourag- of life that have accumulated I had to tell you that I have remained close ing him throughout his career. since high school. They have al- just spent two hours with so many high After graduating from Northwest- ways been there for me, as I will on your amazing Web school friends. I live in ern University’s Medill School of always be for them.” site. I missed my last Florida, so keep me Journalism', he interned briefly Lorraine Triggiani Grant, her reunion, but you can posted so I can make for Buffalo’s Courier Express, best friend from high school, be damned sure I will arrangements to fly “but I was smart enough to get lives maybe three miles away in not miss the next in. Regards to all the out of town before the first Miller Place. "Not a day goes by one. Beyond the JHS people! — Sara snow.” when Lorraine and I don’t talk," creativity and won- Fletcher A confirmed Manhattanite, she says. "We’re like sisters." derful sense of hu- Jon returned to New York in the She’s also in frequent touch with mor you have I would love to party late 1970s and has lived in the Michael Rudy, Kevin Falco, Carol brought to this site, with you youngsters. city ever since. He does visit Jeri- Nache, Nancy Reale, and Mrs. you have given me a — Carole Etkin Sincic cho frequently, though, as his Karen Schwartz. reason to forget sister, Carla Friedman Karen “Mrs. Schwartz has always some sad high- Would definitely at- (JHS ‘80), lives in the family been our adopted Mom,” Janet school days and re- tend! — Kraig Libstag home on Ulster Drive in West says, laughing. “She is always member only the Birchwood. In 1992 Jon and col- ready to give advice or catch me wonderful times and I am actively trying to league John Meehan published a up on the latest Jericho gossip!” friends. — Cathy find a 2007 calendar well-received book about the Recently, her sixteen-year-old Morway Bloomberg so I can enter the American Express scandal involv- daughter, Brittany, was having a reunion date! — Janet ing financier Edmund Safra, problem with a chemistry assign- Thanks for doing this. Rhoads Leslie House of Cards. ment. "I thought, Who can I call What a great trip Want to sample some of for help? Janet got longtime Jeri- down memory lane. My vote is in! — Ken Jon’s work? Go to www.market- cho science teacher Ms. Phyllis — Connie Sapio Longo watch.com. ■ Continued on page 11 Valdez

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First Person Singular Benita Zahn Stulmaker: Albany’s Ace Anchor She Started Out as a Biology Major, but Soon Made the Move to Radio and TV News; Now She’s a Fixture on the TV News in Albany, New York

went to college at SUNY and-white Betty Boop cartoons? Oswego in upstate New York, When he comes up with the right I where the wind from Lake On- idea, the light bulb in his thinking tario blows so hard that in the winter- cap starts flashing? Well, I had one time they put up ropes for you to of those epiphanies. Sitting there in hold onto as you walk to class, to the communications class, I realized keep you from getting blown into one that I needed to pursue a career that of the lagoons. incorporated everything I was good I got my start in radio at WRVO, a Media wasn’t even on my radar at and enjoyed. I needed the writing noncommercial FM station that’s at first. I started as a biology major, skills I clearly had honed in Jericho owned and operated by the state thinking that I’d go into immunologi- as an honors English student; I and based on the Oswego campus. cal research. While growing up, one needed to use my observational and While interning there, I learned how of my favorites books was The Dou- analytical skills, from science; and I to interview, I learned how to cut up ble Helix by James Watson. But I was needed my performance skills, from audio tape. always into theater, too. theater. My first big score was Isaac Asi- During my first two years of col- I almost left Oswego at one point, mov, the prolific science-fiction lege, things reached a point where because I had auditioned for and writer, who was in town. I interviewed whenever I was in the science lab, I been accepted at the National Thea- him in the back seat of a car driving really wanted to be in the theater. ter Institute, an enrichment program downtown with a couple of profes- Plus, while I was very good at dis- for students and young actors in sors. One of his more than five hun- secting, I had trouble killing stuff. Connecticut. Jennifer Garner at- dred books was titled The Sensuous Had a little go-in about that with one tended there, as did Chris Elliott and Dirty Old Man — and he was! Getting of my professors, who was not at all Saturday Night Live’s Rachel Dratch. the interview was easier than trying amused. But money was an issue, and I didn’t to get out of the car without getting She said to me, “Well, I do it.” go. I guess it was probably a good smooched by him. I was very disap- I replied, “That’s not good idea, though. Things kinda worked pointed, because I’d been a big Asi- enough.” out! My friend, by the way, became mov fan. But it was good training for So she gave me a D. That’s when an industrial-arts teacher, and I later on in life; I realized that no mat- I thought to myself, I need to rethink never looked back. ter how big a star you think some- this. body is, they’re just people — and A friend of mine was a runaway Benita’s very first they may not necessarily be delight- chemistry major, and she was taking ful people. an Introduction to Communications interview was with sci-fi The head of the communications class. It was one of those 9:05 lec- author — and letch — department at Oswego was this fabu- tures on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Isaac Asimov. “Getting the lous guy named Lew O’Donnell. In Fridays. She convinced me to sit in interview was easier than the fifties, sixties, and seventies, one day. “Come on, we’ll hide in the there had been a children’s TV pro- back of the room and have coffee.” It trying to get out of the car gram called The Magic Workshop. sounded good. without getting smooched Lew played “Mr. Trolley” (“the great- Remember Grampy, the eccen- by him.” est storyteller in the whole world and tric inventor from the old black- Continued on page 6

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Benita Zahn started looking for new jobs, with everybody pretty much scattering. NBC weatherman Al Roker and I had gone to Continued from page 5 college together, and he told me about an opening at WTVH in Syracuse. outer space”), a role that required him to wear a trolley- That was another pivotal point, because I wasn’t car headpiece. When I graduated college 1976, I was really sure if I was going to stay with this; I thought about offered a job in the business department at Cablevision, going into Manhattan and seeing about selling my voice which was located in Jericho. Lew urged to me take it. for voice-over work. But I got the interview in Syracuse, “Just get your foot in the door,” he advised. the news director offered me the job, and I just said yes The day I accepted the job, I found out that Cablevi- before I could say no. I went in as a producer and re- sion had its own TV studio. I started volunteering my porter, covered a ton of stuff and learned so much, be- time there, and after seven months, they hired me full- cause there were some older, very established people time to be the consumer-affairs reporter. The first time I there, and they were great to work with, while the rest of saw myself on TV — wearing long earrings and the like — us were young and learning. I thought, This isn’t good. (There’s an old I worked there for about two years, saying about someone who doesn’t look which was my game plan from the be- good on television: “great face for ra- ginning. Then I had two interviews. dio!”) A few months later, I also picked One was at a real big station in Harris- up a job doing the news at WGBB, an AM burg, WNEP, and one at WNYT, the station that broadcast from Merrick. NBC affiliate in Albany, New York. I got For the first year or so, I lived back in the job and came to Albany in 1979 my old house in Princeton Park. Then I as the assignment editor, which moved up to Sea Cliff with a guy I means that you’re in-house. You’re the worked with and a friend of his. We one who listens to all the police scan- shared a cute little place that was unbe- ners and reads all the news releases, lievably cold. It had been a summer puts together the crews, and works house, about two blocks from the water, with the producer to decide what and had never been insulated. I spent you’re going to cover every day. most of that winter wrapped in four or But I don’t sit still real well. After five layers. You’d get into your bed at about seven months of that, I went to night with a quilt and a sleeping bag, and you’d warm the news director and said, “This is the gig: Either put the spot you were on. But if you rolled over, you froze all me on the street, or I’m looking for another job.” And he over again. took me at my word. God bless my Mom’s soul: Because I was living with One of my first big stories was covering the return of two guys, she made me promise that I wouldn’t tell any- the hostages from Iran in 1981, because they flew in to body. At the time, the family was planning a surprise Stewart Air Force Base in Newburgh. That was just over- twenty-fifth wedding anniversary for my folks. One day I whelming. That taught me how to cover an event and was talking to an aunt of mine when she blurted out, not let tears get in the way. “Benita, are you living Three’s Company?” Not long after that, I began anchoring a “News at I said, “Well, actually, Aunt Carol, I am — except it’s Noon” show. After a few years, it was doing pretty well in only one girl and two guys.” the ratings, but our eleven o’clock broadcast was tank- At the station, I was already carving out niches for ing, so they canceled the noon show to put more effort myself. I bamboozled my way into the Nassau Coliseum into the eleven o’clock show. When I came here, the sta- because presidential candidate Jimmy Carter was tion was number three in our market and in a rebuilding speaking, and I wanted to see him and get a sense of phase. We’ve been number one for fifteen years now. who this guy was. I knew right then that he’d win, be- Continued on page 7 cause of his ability to electrify an audience. I also cov- ered the Republicans on election night 1976. Everyone’s Got an Interesting Story — Even You! Cablevision was having some financial issues at that How about sharing it in “First Person Singular” in a fu- time. A company called in a loan, and in order to pay it, ture issue? Interested? E-mail [email protected]. the company had to disband the newsroom. So we all

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Benita Zahn Often, there’s a local angle to national stories. For instance, I flew out to Sacramento, California, for the Continued from page 6 Unabomber trial, because Ted Kaczynski’s brother, I went from anchoring at noon to doing government David, is from our area. During the trial, I was the only reporting. To have as many jobs as I’ve had here, I reporter to get an interview with David. He trusted us. would’ve had to have worked in four or five different cit- For one thing, we’d made a conscious decision to re- ies. It’s been great. Even though we’re a local station, I spect his privacy and not stake out his front lawn, like all get to cover plenty of national stories. With the exception the other news organizations were doing. of 1988, I’ve covered a national presidential convention David imposed one condition: the interview could air every four years. What’s interesting is that you find out on our station, but we couldn’t sell the footage to any- real fast who you’re going to vote for — or not vote for — one else. I kidded with him afterward: “You ruined my politics aside, by looking at the candidates. Being up career; if I’d given this interview to the Today show, who close, shaking their hand, looking in their eyes. knows where I’d be today!” In 1981, we followed a local woman to Israel for a Because I’ve been here for more than twenty-five world gathering of holocaust survivors. That was just years and have a track record, I’m fortunate that I’m overwhelming, and the program went on to win a bronze the go-to person whenever there’s a big story. Last year award in the New York International Film Television a photographer, producer, and I drove down to New Or- Awards. leans in an RV to cover the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina. I was on the short list to go to Iraq to be embedded with the troops. I really wanted to do it. But the company that owns WNYT has another station right in their back- yard, and they sent the crew from there instead. My hus- band probably wasn’t thrilled about the prospect of my going to Iraq, but, well, Bob knows that I’m going to do what I’m going to do. We kid around about that, and I’ll say to him, “Hey, Babe — as advertised!” Continued on page 8

Anchors away! Off to Louisiana to cover Hurri- cane Katrina. (Above) Benita in New Orleans’ French Quarter interviewing a search-and- rescue worker from Los Angeles.

(Below) Benita with her two-man crew. The man in back is a former homicide detective who was assigned to them as a security guard.

(Above) Home base in Slidell, Louisiana. See the pan to Benita’s left? “We had been in the ‘Mud Zone,’ a toxic area,” she explains. “When you came back, you’d leave your boots in that pan, which was filled with a bleach solution.”

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Benita Zahn Continued from page 7 “… And Now,

A Husband Who Can Wear a Pair of Pants Is for the young- Good to Find! Shters …”

Bob is my second husband; the first guy missed a couple of important corners in his life. But Bob is just great. I met him in 1996 — on a What are some class story, as a matter of fact. There’s an annual of 1972 progeny up to? long-distance run for women up here; we do a piece about it every year, to encourage women Find out right here … to run. I was interviewing one of the previous on our page ... winners, a teacher in Saratoga. I’m a runner too, and she’s trained me. Anyway, she knew that my first husband E van Caputo Friedmann and Gian San Antonio and I had split, and before my photographer and I left, she asked me to meet her new ath- letic director at Saratoga Springs Schools. I’m thinking, Yeah, yeah, while she goes to get him. And out comes this guy who I think can wear a pair of pants! And we chat a little. He’s not wearing a wedding ring, but he seems very set- tled; I figure he’s got to have a wife and two kids tucked away somewhere. So I think nothing of it. My friend calls me a week or so later and says, “My athletic director thought you were kinda cute. Can I give him your number?” I said sure. And the rest is history. We got married in

1999. We live in Halfmoon, a suburb of Albany. It’s When Randy San when the choices one of the fastest growing communities in New Antonio, who for fraternities Continued on page 9 lives in Grape- were announced. Benita being awarded an honorary degree last vine, Texas, took Gian said that May from Albany Medical College, making her his son Gian, a Evan showed him an honorary doctor. Wonder if she accepts high-school sen- what the campus honorary patients? ior, to tour the University of was really about, forget about Arizona, they were greeted by the tour!” sophomore Evan Friedmann, Randy and Linda dated for son of Linda Caputo Fried- two years in high school. In a mann and her husband, recent conversation, the two, Eugene. According to Randy, long happily married to other when they met, Gian said to people, were fuzzy on the de- Evan, “Hey, we could have tail of who ended the relation- been brothers!” and from that ship. “The way I remembered moment on, the two got along it was that he dumped me,” as if they were. Linda reports, says Linda, “but he claims “Evan took Gian to a few frat that I dumped him. We had a parties, as it was the night good laugh.” ■

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Benita Zahn women face age discrimination in a well. Since health has always been way that their male colleagues don’t. an interest of mine, I jumped on it. I Continued from page 6 But that hasn’t been the case for love it, because the impact that you me. I think it’s because Baby Boom- can have on people’s lives is unbe- York state. It’s great up here. First of ers have never been comfortable lievable. I hardly walk around believ- all, I like being outdoors. The sum- being relegated to the back of the ing any of my press, good, bad, or mers in Saratoga are unbelievably bus. We have, as a group, always indifferent, but when you get a letter gorgeous. Skiing is just forty-five min- demanded to be front and center. from somebody that says, “Because utes away. What I also like is our And while there are plenty of you did such-and-such a story, it proximity to New York City — just two pretty young gals on TV, by and large, saved my mother’s life,” that’s not and a half hours away. (My youngest boomers still are in charge of the bad at the end of the day. brother, Jeffrey, is an anesthesiolo- remote control. And I think they want I’m also in my third year with a gist at Mount Sinai Medical Center in to see “themselves” on TV. In gen- program called Healthlink on Al- Manhattan, and Alan, the middle eral, these are serious times, and bany’s PBS affiliate, WMHT. To have guy, owns a real-estate company in because of that, people are looking a half-hour forum every week, where Ithaca. So they’re not too far away.) for familiarity. So if you have a ma- we can bring in people with a particu- From Albany, you can be in Boston in lar medical condition and give them three hours. Montreal isn’t far, ei- a voice is just great. The goal is to ther. It’s really the best of everything. help people become their own best Plus, there are so many downstate health advocates. New Yorkers up here. It seems like One of my favorite stories in- everybody has a weekend place in volved a thirty-two-year-old man who Hudson these days. was awaiting a heart transplant. I At times, I had thought about flew with his transplant team down leaving for a bigger city. But our sta- to Huntington Hospital on Long Is- tion has all the toys; for example, we land, where’s they’d harvested the were one of the first stations on the donor heart, then came back into the East Coast to go live. We’ve never operating room here. I watched as acted like a fiftieth-market station, the doctors put in the new heart. we’ve always operated more like a There’s a moment when the new twenty-fifth-market station. Besides, Do blondes have more fun? heart should start beating, and you up here you can have a life. It’s very Looks that way: Benita at our must have fifteen, twenty people in easy to be overbooked doing speak- thirtieth reunion. the OR, nobody saying a word, and ing engagements, MC’ing, and then: voila! We’ve had the opportu- there’s always some good cause out ture TV anchor who’s been there for nity follow the fellow for a couple of there that somebody hits you up for. a while and inspires confidence, peo- years now, and he’s doing great. Doing that in a bigger city, on top of ple stay with them. everything else, would probably be For the last twenty years, in addi- So Tell Us: When Did You Decide to untenable. I have a nice backyard, tion to anchoring the five o’clock and Go Blonde? and I like to play golf. five-thirty news, my beat has been What can I tell you? You make consumer health, which allows me to When I started to go gray! Probably choices that you think are right, and utilize my science background. I kind in my thirties. I took a perm one day sometimes you get lucky and they of fell into it. The station wanted to when I was about thirty-one. We went are. This was clearly the place I was feature me and another gal, Chris to the beach a few days later. Two, supposed to stay. What’s also great Jansing, who you’ve probably seen three days after that, I was blow- is that after you’ve been a broad- on MSNBC. Research showed that drying my hair and I looked in the caster in the same market for a long viewers were most interested in mirror and said, “What the heck hap- time, people come to trust you. money matters and health. pened here?!” It had oxidized and It’s funny, because twenty years They happened to call me in first gotten kind of red. Red doesn’t look ago, I figured that by the time I was to offer me my choice of beats. Well, great on TV, though, so I’ve been a forty, it would all be over. TV news- I don’t balance my checkbook real blonde ever since. ■

JHS Class of 1972 Thirderly On-Line Newsletter • Spring 2006 Page 10 T O O N S C A R T O O N S C A R T O O T O O N S C A R T O O N S C A R T By Dan Clurman

About Dan: “I have been a coach and edu- cator for the last twenty years, deliver- ing training and classes in non-profits, uni- versities, and corpora- tions.

“I assist professionals, business people, couples, and students to more skill- fully navigate life transi- tions, as well as improve their communication and presentations. I also have a small practice as a Fel- denkrais® practitioner, a movement-based form of education.

“I've cowritten a few books, Money Disagree- ments: How to Talk About Them and Conversations With Critical Thinkers, as well as a book of poems and drawings, Floating Upstream. The book these toons are part of, You've Got to Draw the Line Somewhere, will be pub- lished shortly.”

To purchase Floating Up- stream, send $15 (plus $2 postage) to Dan Clurman, 396 61st Street, Oakland, CA 94618. For Money Disagreements, send $10 to the same address.

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Checking In with the each took some extra time to show Disneyland Paris, Notre Dame Cathe- Classes of ‘71 and ‘73 they cared about me and my future. dral, and St. Mark’s Basilica.” Mean- "My daughter is going through while, the search for colleges has Continued from page 4 high school now, and it just seems begun in earnest. Mandell on the phone. Problem so different. I keep wondering, Were Janet’s own college search didn’t solved. kids as mean back then as they are take long at all, thanks to a January Not too surprisingly, Janet has now? I really didn’t have that experi- snowfall. While visiting different fond memories of growing up in the ence. I feel badly that Brittany is not state colleges, she pulled into Gene- Oakwood section of Jericho. "I loved going to have as positive a high- seo, nestled smack between Syra- it," she says. "It was an unusual school experience or feel tied to her cuse and Buffalo. "It looked exactly place to grow up, though we probably community like I did." like Peyton Place," she says, laugh- didn’t realize it at the time. I made ing. "A beautiful little town with white friends for life, and was given an ex- houses with wraparound porches. I cellent education and a desire to just fell in love with it. I got out the learn. school’s catalog to look at what its “We had the freedom to move majors were. Speech pathology was about the town, to create, to develop one. And that’s how I picked out independence. I could walk to Mid- what I was going to do for the rest of Island Plaza to take the bus to the my life!" beach, ride a bike on the overpass to Janet returned to Long Island for get to Cantiaque Park, work at the an internship and earned her mas- Milleridge Inn shops, participate in ter’s degree at Hofstra. She worked recreation at the gym on Friday in a rehabilitation center and made nights and Saturday mornings, and home visits to develop the communi- walk home along route 106/107. cation skills of head-injured children “The teachers were very suppor- and stroke patients. Janet worked as tive,” she continues. “I remember a speech-language pathologist within going to several teachers’ homes. It the Sachem School District’s special- was like having an extended family. “ ed department for twenty years. She and Michael Rudy used to play Janet Rhoads Leslie: “My Jericho She now works privately with pre- with Larry and Shari Schwartz and friends remind me who I truly am — schoolers in their homes, which she attend Larry’s football games. She way down beneath the layers of life loves. "We laugh together all the and Nancy babysat for Herr Marwill, that have accumulated since high time," she says. "I think that’s what reading Grimm’s Fairytales in Ger- school.” makes kids special. They still get ex- man at bedtime! cited every time you come: ‘Miss Other memories: Mr. Obstfeld Brittany, an aspiring actress, Janet’s here!’ Plus, at age three or and his wife throwing a party for his "takes up most of my time," says four, they make such progress so students at their home. In fact, Janet Janet. "I do a lot of driving." The teen- fast. It’s really wonderful to see, and purchased her first car from him: a ager just starred as the Cat in the the parents are there to share in powder-blue 1967 Mustang converti- Hat in her high school’s production their growth." ble. Miss Helen DeCollibus and her of Seussical and has already ap- Meeting her husband, Don Les- new fiancé came to a football cele- peared in Evita, A Chorus Line, The lie, wasn’t as uncomplicated as bration at the Rudys. Sound of Music, and The Jungle choosing a college. "We met because “There were many other teachers Book at local playhouses like the Air- my first husband and Don’s first wife who had a positive impact on my life port Playhouse, Theater Three, and were cousins. Got that? We’d both and values — not only for the curricu- Gateway. married into the same large Italian lum they taught, but for their sincer- "She was recently invited into the family, and there were a lot of family ity and commitment to their stu- Sound of America, an honor chorus," gatherings. dents: Mrs. Reff, Mr. Tobin, Mr. Bry- Janet explains. “This July the group "Years went by, and I got di- ant, Dr. Krahm, Mr. Pogany-Powers, will be performing in a variety of vorced. Then more time went by, and Miss DeCollibus. In different ways, places throughout Europe, including Continued on page 18

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It’s 1971: ? ? Perhaps you’re thinking about which college to attend. If so, author Susan Berman has just the book for you: The Underground Guide to the College of Your Choice

Warning: Some Adult-ish Content

Published by Signet in May 1971, The Underground Guide rated col- leges, but using a radically different yardstick. Sample categories in- cluded “Academic Bullshit,” “Bread” (tuition), “Brothers and Sisters” — including the ratio of “cats” to “chicks,” and general impressions of the latter’s promiscuity — the going price for weed, and so on. If your cam- pus reeked of marijuana, tie-dyed shirts were everywhere, student pro- tests inevitably ended with at least one building burned to the ground, and the infirmary dispensed birth-control pills like Pez, it no doubt earned the acerbic Guide’s highest accolades.

how did your school stack up? The Underground Guide on SUNY Stony Brook: Long Island “A freaky campus where New York City the dorms are like C. W. Post College Barnard College (women only) “Plastic hip commuters. ‘We have a lot of brothels.” Yep, sounds “Chicks can take courses at Columbia, and boneheads here who just take the easy about right. they usually plot their schedules to do it so courses.’ Geography is one of them and that they can meet guys. There’s a whole therefore considered groovy by these quiz barrage of types of chicks. First, there’s the kids. Dr. Lathstein’s philosophy course is SUNY at Stony Brook Fifth Avenue type: stylish, long Pucci scarf, one of the only ones that’s popular be- “This campus is the hippest and most intel- Gucci shoes, tailored double-knit sweater cause it’s interesting rather than easy. lectual of the SUNY campuses. Every- from Lord & Taylor, thick gold hoop ear- Everyone has a car, and parking is for shit. body is hip and freaky, for the most part. It rings and an expensive watch. The Jewish Chicks are the plastic-hip types who say is one of the freakiest and most casual liberal: navy-blue mini with expensive knit they love balling but have done it once. campuses in the East. Chicks are liber- sweaters or a matching leather vest, long Some cats and chicks are into the ‘rich-hip ated; there’s always a chick spending the hair, and thick-heeled shoes. The freaks look, but many have just casual threads. night. Dates are super casual; a big date wear jeans, T-shirts, crocheted belts and The biggest hang is the Commuter Cafete- consists of going into New York to the Fill- sandals. The chicks, on the whole, are ria. Eat at the Rathskellar or Burger King. more East. The drug scene is very heavy sedate and passive. They complain they Frats still exist but have been weakened by — the campus is literally flooded with can’t meet anyone, but there’s plenty of dope. Students are rich and apathetic; they grass and mescaline. Acid goes for $2.50 part-time cohabitation. Dates start when a go to class and go home, blithely on their a tab. The biggest political action was after cat calls and tells a chick to ‘come on merry little ways. Grass is very big here; a drug bust in 1969; students set fire to over.’ They smoke and screw, and the next most everyone smokes. The Post Pioneer trucks and stoned buildings. In the student morning, the chick is lucky if she gets is a conservative, boring paper that em- union, there’s a groovy craft shop where breakfast. ‘Around junior year, everyone phasizes sports coverage. People are tie-dying, pottery, and jewelry-making are starts looking for a husband.’ Vacations at reading The Godfather and Abbie Hoff- taught.. The biggest creative bag is music. home or skiing at Stowe.” man’s books.” Many students play the guitar or piano.” Continued on page 13

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Underground Was Your College Like This ...? Guide to Colleges Good ol’ Dean Continued from page 12 Panty raids! Ice cream social! What’shisname! Columbia University (men only) “Urban, alienated, Ivy League assembly- line education. ‘The approach to learning is more scholarly than enthusiastic.’ The campus is so sterile that they had to form a Warmth Committee. Columbia College has fun-city intellectuals, messy and slightly odorous on summer days, dressed in jeans and ugly shirts with a full head of hair. Boots, wingtips, and Weejuns exist. Co- lumbia cats ‘get it on’ for Barnard chicks and other sister-school counterparts. Dates consist of rapping, smoking, and going either to the Thalia to see an old Bogart flick or for a ride on the Staten Island ferry. The Columbia Spectator is political and excellent. Dope is prevalent. People are reading Do It! by Jerry Rubin and Eros and Civilization by Marcuse.” A gathering by “I promise to study Go team, go! the old oak tree! harder next time!” New York University “NYU is a large impersonal factory. You arty kids have that expensive plastic-hip State Park. The People’s Park in Ithaca is are on your own in Greenwich Village to look, and the real freaks wear overall work two sidewalk blocks of Eddy Street. After survive and learn. ‘Film and drama are pants and tie-dyed shirts. The commuters 11 P.M. every night you see freaks there. It incredible.’ Olympia Dukakis (an actress) are for the most part Catholic and virtuous; has its own mayor who sometimes negoti- ‘teaches a fine acting course.’ Chicks garb the freaks dig screwing and cohabiting. ates with the mayor of Ithaca.” themselves in lots of vinyl and plastic — The Spectrum is considered the second the hip synthetics — heavy eye makeup best college paper within the U.S., consid- University of Rochester and lipstick. Cats wear bell-bottoms, carry ered fairly radical by some. Buffalo is the “Rich Long Island pseudo-hippies. The briefcases, and trim their moustaches … second windiest city in the nation. ‘The generalized undergrad student is loaded Everyone complains that it’s hard to meet nicest time of year in Buffalo is when with bread, can’t piss off his parents no people here. Rallies are the spot to meet you’re away.’ Nice days in Buffalo are ‘two matter what he does because they love and greet. Fraternities are dying out. Most days in spring and 1 1/2 days in the fall.’” him so much, does things that he think are action takes place ‘in his apartment.’ Lids fun because he was conditioned to think go for $25, tabs for $5, easy to score in the Cornell University they were fun. The professional-type stu- Village. The campus is brutally urban. The “Probably has the most beautiful campus dent (in physics, optics, or chemistry) is the Commerce building looks like a mauso- in the United States. Charlie Ackerman of one who asks the professor the exact leum. Most people want to get learning, get the sociology department is by far the most question he wants to be asked, wears married, and get a job. They find politics popular professor. He teaches a course ironed clothes, carries a briefcase, and too confusing. Ecology hasn’t made it on called ‘Deviants,’ which is other-wise wants to start off earning $14,500 a year. campus; they’re too weak from the air pol- known as ‘Nuns and Sluts.’ Freshmen Then there’s the intellectual — not really lution to protest.” males never get a date; they can’t even an intellectual, but think he is. Wears his buy one. They don’t have cars, and chicks hair long and sports a beard, spends lots New York State only like upperclassmen. Most chicks are of money on cheap clothes (twenty-five liberated; they get superiority complexes pairs of Levis?), goes to all the SDS rallies SUNY at Buffalo because so many guys want to date them. and fights for the microphone. When he The largest and most diverse of the SUNY Not much grass around to buy — mostly gets it, he doesn’t know what to say, so he campuses. The campus is divided into hash. Dopers hang out at Dunkin’ Donuts repeats what the previous person just said. three types: the commuters (from Buffalo) on Meadow Street. Head in any direction My favorite building is Rhees Library — It’s tend to be conservative, the New York City for an escape, especially Taughannock Continued on page 14

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Underground … Or Perhaps More Like This? Guide to Colleges Methamphetamine Good ol’ Dean Continued from page 13 Police raids! social! What’shisname! called ‘The Nipple of Knowledge,’ because it has a shining red light on top of it at night.”

Syracuse University

“Tremendously vast, uninspiring, fraternity- controlled place. Cheap records at the S.O.S. Record Shop. Syracuse students are made up of those who were rejected from the Ivy League schools. They are upper-middle-class, suburban, and drive Corvettes. About half are hip and half are straight. The “toads” are the intellectual, stay-at-home nonpolitical types. They have short hair, wear white socks, baggy pants, and penny loafers. The forestry people are called “stumpies” — they are usually very nice and wear tight dungarees, lumberjack A gathering by the “I promise to study harder jackets, and stumpy boots. Greeks died in Go team, go! ROTC! next time! Now leggo!” 1970. ‘People are embarrassed to admit that they are in a house’ — lots of anti- Greek sentiment on campus. There is no of Maryland students burned him in effigy Rutgers University (all men) student union, although the Jabberwocky after his speech about the Cambodian “Most cats are lukewarm hip. They look at the bottom of Kimmel Dining Hall s a invasion. The official school paper is Con- casual, have sloppy hair, and wear jeans. pseudo student union. About 70% of the cordiences — their articles suck. There’s a Cats date chicks from Douglass, who people have tried drugs; 25% are regular stuffed whale’s penis in the in the presi- aren’t that liberated. Hangs include the users. Most students are unable to grasp dent’s office.” student center, whch is usuallyt filled with the essence of political ideas: ’They’ll drive high-school freaks. Lots of people smoke to the revolution in their Corvettes.’” Out of State in the dorms, and lids go for $15. Sore at the student center, but there are narcs all Union College New Jersey over. Most students are liberal by Phil “Of Union, Skidmore says, ‘The close but Princeton University (mostly men) Ochs’s definition: ‘10% to the left of center gross school.’ Union finally went coed in “Times are changing for this former bastion in good times, 10% to the right of center if 1970 after a long struggle. The campus of the conservative upper-class aristoc- it affects them personally.’ People talk looks straight, generally. Levi Sta-prest, racy. Princeton offers an excellent educa- about the war and read Soul on Ice.” jeans, and T-shirts. The jocks casual. The tion and is rated in the top three Ivy freshmen look hipper than the rest of the League schools. The Princeton man starts Connecticut campus. The engineering students are out being conceited because because he University of Connecticut at Storrs super straight. The social life is primarily got in. And the fact that most girls at “Ninety percent of both sexes are straight. through the fraternities with other colleges schools in the East are dying to go out with The first thing they do when they arrive is (Albany, Skidmore). Horniness runs ram- a Princeton man doesn’t help much. Some go immediately to the book store and buy a pant here. The Beta turtling team is associ- men belong to eating clubs, which are the blue windbreaker with an official U Conn ated with the Beta fraternity — they have a same as fraternities, for all practical pur- insignia. In the winter, people wear huge tendency to gross out people, and their poses. They select and reject, traumatizing Arctic-type fur coats; in the summer, chicks favorite trick is dry-humping on the floor in the freshmen. Forced celibacy is the rule sunbathe, and the cats walk by to check one big pile. Hangs are the Rathskellar (a during the week, unless you can grab a them out. The fraternities do the dating campus snack bar), the Library Plaza, and chick from one of the local high schools. thing (parties and beer), but they are dying. Diamonte’s and the Union Inn. Nixon’s On the weekends, chicks from Vassar, People go to the A’s (the airport restau- comments about ‘bums’ was made after he Wellesley, and Smith flock onto the cam- rant) and the Rock Garden, a vicious pick- heard that Union College and University pus in search of a man.” Continued on page 15

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Underground long, and there are few freaks or Brooks ties, and no electric hair freaks. Modera- Brothers suits types. Lots of dating, and tion is the word. School politics are ac- Guide to Colleges sexual activity is on the rise. Local hangs tively liberal. Dow demonstrations in include the Charles River, the Union, the 1967. In 1969 blacks took over Ford Hall Continued from page 14 Dug-Out (straight bar), and Harvard for eleven days with ten nonnegotiable

Square. There are lots of women in Bos- demands, such as an Afro-American up place. There are three types of chick ton. BU males complain, however, that department, more blacks on campus, here: the first group are free and liberated, most chicks desire a Harvard or MIT male. and an Afro-American lounge. Campus is the second group are virgins, and the third But, fortunately for BU males, there aren’t described ‘a medieval castle; an Ameri- are in the great middle ground that can be enough of those gems to go around. A big, can Jewish historical tomb.’” moved. There’s an excellent chance to drab urban campus in downtown Boston. pick up, get laid, and get the clap. The Escapes include skiing, New York, and Emerson College worst thing about the campus is the wind home.” “Emerson people are preparing for pro- — it’s freezing.” fessional jobs, so they can take their

Brandeis University place in society. There are two types: the Wesleyan University “Superintellectual heads, liberal politics, collegiate straight and the new hippie. “Students are fragmented into political bagel bodies, and Jewish ethnic personali- But all are basically middle-class in their trips, drug trips, and academic trips. ties. Brandeis is a very intellectually ori- ideals and aspirations. People hang Wesleyan just went coed, and Wesleyan ented, high-pressure place. The majority of around in groups. Sexual activity is good males are reveling in the change. Most students are lukewarm hip and wear blue and generally friendly rather than overin- action happens on the weekends. Guys jeans, work shirts, and boots. The nice tellectual or serious. Girls aren’t really bring the girls in in droves, ball them, send Jewish boy become a nice Jewish hippie liberated but aren’t hung up either. them home for the rest of the week, and here. Chicks are tidy-looking, natural, and Hangs are the low stone wall next to the forget about them till next week. Kinda like ‘Jewish liberated.’ ’The Jewish mother sidewalk on campus, the Smoker a male chauvinist cattle drive. The usual lurks behind the pretty coed!’ No suits and Continued on page 16 date is a party and a joint. On rainy days, couples go belly-sliding down Foss Hill. The infirmary has very bad services as far The Strange, Sad Saga of Susan Berman as drugs are concerned. Don’t go there for After publishing The Underground under mysterious circumstances in VD or bum trips. Guide, Susan Berman went on 1957,when Susan was twelve; her

write eight more books, as well as mother committed suicide a year Massachusetts Amherst College (mostly men) several screenplays. The book that later. Guide is dedicated to her par- “Education is excellent, classes are small, garnered the most attention was ents, “who never had the opportu- and the faculty is very distinguished. Ratio 1981's Easy Street, which re- nity to go to college.” of cats to chicks: 45:1. Cats are gener- counted her childhood growing up On Christmas Eve 2000, Susan ally lukewarm hip and have that ‘Amherst with a mobster for a father. Berman was murdered in her Los Cowboy’ look, complete with jeans, lumber David Berman part- Angeles home, shot jackets, work boots, and moustaches. Little nered with notorious once in the head exe- educational discussion, more about who gangster Ben “Bugsy” cution style. Friends screwed who. Almost zero freaks except Siegel to open Las Ve- believe it was because for a few Darien, Connecticut, refugees. gas’s Flamingo Hotel in she was about to speak Dating is the mode. Crappy pattern of 1946. The following to investigators about game playing, name dropping, and screw- year, Siegel was gunned her college friend ing. It’s hard for the Amherst male to over- come his country-club background and talk down in a hail of bullets in his Holly- Robert Durst, the ne’er-do-well heir real talk to chicks. The average date is wood bungalow, after which Ber- to the Durst family fortune, who going out with a Smith or Holyoke girl and man continued running the Fla- remains the prime suspect in the drinking beer at a frat — hopefully followed mingo. mysterious disappearance of his by Instant Karma and bed. ’No one goes In Easy Street and a subse- first wife, Kathleen, in 1982. At the anywhere on weekends; we stay here and quent book, Lady Las Vegas, Susan time, Berman had acted as an in- hustle female counterparts.’” wrote of being surrounded by the formal spokeswoman for Durst. Mafia elite as a child. She jokingly Like the Kathleen Durst case, Boston University referred to herself as the Jewish Susan Berman’s murder remains “A big social school. There’s a cross- Mafia Princess. David Berman died unsolved. ■ section of everything. Hair is generally

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Underground Tufts University dals, T-shirts, and have medium-length “Tufts people are friendly and open. Very hair. Lots of semi-shacking up on week- Guide to Colleges few fancy clothes or freaks. Cats have ends, when parents won’t find out. Most of Continued from page 15 moderately long hair and are neat. Subur- the chicks are liberated, and screwing is ban types — don’t blow their noses on common. Politically, Penn students ‘don’t (campus snack bar), and Ken’s, a Boylston their sleeves. Courteous liberals. A relaxed have it in for capitalism. We like capital- Street deli. The drug scene is light; about dating pattern. A few live together; the ism.’ If you like to study and enjoy what the one-third smoke. Not many heavy drugs.” freshmen are the hippest and were city of Philadelphia has to offer, you can weaned on the pill. Everyone hangs on survive. Penn doesn’t much sense of com- Massachusetts Institute of Technology campus — ‘like high school; it’s close-knit.’ munity, so you have to make your own “At MIT, they have a humanities require- The campus newspaper is The Observer, entertainment.” ments. The foremost scientific institution in an appropriate description of a Tufts un- the United States. Dr. Strangelove types dergrad.” University of Pittsburgh may apply. Tech men wear gray pants and Good academically, bad for your lungs. red socks and act like Giles’ Goat Boy. No Pennsylvania These city dwellers have the lukewarm-hip spiffy dressers or freaks. ‘Most hardly ever Lehigh University look, while the straights look like Sears screw and seldom date. Most freshman “The most exciting thing here is the wres- circa 1960. Fraternities are still alive and have never had a date in their lives.’ tling matches; they really pack ’em in. Le- into their own thing (blackballing). Most of Chicks are very, very ugly. Grass is getting high is known for its engineering school. the community is apathetic politically. You very popular, and it’s very easy to get at The facilities and teachers are excellent. have to search to find the radical leaders. $20 a lid.” Students dress in comfortable threads; The Black Action Society is powerful but is they all look respectably grubby. The girl more of a cultural organization. The cam- University of Massachusetts situation is drastic (50:1 cat-to-chick ratio). pus is located in an industrial urban area. “If you’ve been rejected from Ivy League Most cats go out with someone from their Escapes? None near. Make your own eco- schools and want that kind of education, hometown or date chicks from Cedar Crest system out of what you can in Pittsburgh.” U. of Mass. Is a good choice. These stu- College. Frat rats like to go into town and dents are rather dull middle-class conser- pick up a ‘scruff’ (town chick) for a one- District of Columbia vatives and Boston’s suburbia hips. Drag- night stand. Bethlehem is a steel town; American University ass types, few freaks and few dress-ups. obnoxious weather and environment. Sur- “American University supports the flag. It Compared to Berkeley, most people put vival is hard with so few girls.” trains people best to be future politicians, you to sleep. Dating is the thing — little diplomats, or hard hats. This campus is living together, and not too many chicks Penn State hip, but in-the-structure hip. Over half the are liberated or concerned about it. Beer “Still the play school of PA. This school is campus are longhairs, and most students and parties or flicks are the average dates. so large that there is an abundance of wear jeans and T-shirts. Yet many are People read best-seller. Politically, the every type. Sex is a big thing here what- aspiring to government jobs and won’t be school is ’a hotbed of apathy.’” ever faction you’re in. Freaky chicks are so anxious to join the revolution (what, and liberated while others are not, ‘but on aver- waste all of those contacts?!). The campus Northeastern University age, it’s pretty hot here.’ What with fifty-six is into drugs and it’s estimated that 80% “The campus is is in the heart of Boston. fraternities and twenty-six sororities, they smoke grass. In 1969, narcs busted stu- Plenty of air and noise pollution. All cam- are influential. It still has elements of the dents in the dorms at 5 A.M., and future pus buildings are grayish-white high rises, rah-rah school it used to be. Most fat boys busts are always possible. American stu- efficient sterile containers with no lawns to smoke grass now instead of drinking dents are really into health food. Many are alleviate what looks like a hospital com- booze. People hang at the Hub (Hetzel honey and wheat-germ freaks, and there’s plex. Most people use public transporta- Union Building), the Wall (where people sit a groovy health-food store ten minutes tion. Most students are middle-class and and smoke), the Jawbone coffeehouse, away in Bethesda, Maryland. The infirmary lower middle-class, and don’t have costly and the bar My O My. No one travels dur- is ‘run by witch-doctors with rattles and threads. Every type of city dweller with a ing the fall term because the school is a masks.’” full range of hair, from ex-Marines to big social-action place.” freaks. Clothes are casual and functional. George Washington University Dating is straight arrow — night people are University of Pennsylvania “This campus is hip. Lots of freaky chicks heavily married. Chicks aren’t really liber- “Penn is academically excellent, and Penn go braless, and cats have beards and ated and are husband hunting. All drugs students are serious. They are more intel- moustaches. Chicks are liberated, and are available, lids for $20. Northeastern is lectual than the Temple U. plodders but there is lots of cohabitation by twos and in a diploma mill. People don’t care about less intellectual than Harvard or Berkeley communes. Dating is super casual. People politics.” people. Most are hip and wear jeans, san- Continued on page 17

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Underground McGregor Hall. Professors are liberated, friendly brothers. Common practice is for a secretaries are liberated, everyone is liber- chick to offer herself free of charge to a Guide to Colleges ated. College president James Payson cat in exchange for room and board Continued from page 16 Dixon (chairman of Dick Gregory’s new (slavery!). Dorm rats look like whoever political party) is a good man. Antioch has they are emulating this month. Sin City rap and smoke and screw. The big hang is supported the peace moratoriums by clos- straights have sporty shirts, sunglasses, the university center, which has bowling, ing down the school and giving the staff a and good tans. One-fourth of the campus billiards, and a rathskellar. Straights go to paid vacation. Even the workers on cam- is married and another one-fourth lives the Tom Foolery bar or to Quigley’s sand- pus are aligned with the students.” together. Sex is free, and plenty of chicks wich shop. The drug scene is very heavy are liberated. Straights meet at Sin City — nearly everyone smokes, and lids run Miami University Lounge, Thirsty Gator, Dubs, or around the $20 an ounce. Mescaline is also on the “Quiet academic life is the rule at Miami. pools in the apartment complexes. Hips Upsurge. There is no campus to speak of; Away from it all in Oxford, Ohio, about the meet at Anthony’s or at the Union dances. the school is in the middle of a semicom- only things to do are to get drunk at the frat They hold ‘come-togethers’ on the plaza merical area. Thurston Hall, the girls’ dorm, house and study for tests. No smoking in every weekend.” is referred to as ‘The Zoo. Washington, class and in the dining halls. Cats have to DC, is polluted by drunk politicians who wear a coat and tie on Sundays. Greeks University of Miami may breathe on you.” used to be big, but are declining. Miami “Sun-tan city. The main party school in the University is known as the ’Mother of Fra- country has for a long time between trying Georgetown University ternities’ and the ‘Cradle of Coaches’ to raise its level of academics, and a few “The campus is still, unfortunately, straight. (Miami does the football thing). People are departments are good. The School of Ma- Chicks wear dresses or pantsuits. Cats still getting pinned; it’s staid and stuffy.” rine Biology is tops in the country. wear new jeans or slacks. Only about one- ‘Everyone here has money to burn. They fourth of the campus is hip — they wear Oberlin College are always dressed fashionable rich hip.’ rags. But things are progressing, as three “Students dress casually. The straightest Most chicks go braless or swing often. years ago some cats wore sports coats people on campus go into the music con- People are very concerned with suntans and ties to class. Local hangs include servatory. Quite a sizable freak population. and beach parties. As for sex, ‘every guy is 1789, a jock bar; Walsh lobby; the Cellar Lots of intense one-to-one relationships, expected to get his chick every other Door on M Street; and the Charlie Weis- and mosty chicks are liberated. It’s night.’ People are reading Woodstock Na- muller deli. The Hoya is a conservative groupie-type functions in the freshman tion and Playboy.” student newspaper. Students read the year (people rinm in packs), and pairing off Quick-Silver Times, a good underground becomes prevalent in the sophomore year. Illinois rag. Entertainment is parties, dope, and sex.” Northwestern University “There is no intellectual community as Ohio New Hampshire such, and the departments are dependent Antioch College Dartmouth College on the professors as to whether or not they “Antioch, one of the oldest bohemian lib- “Dartmouth offers fine educational facili- are good. The German, theater, and jour- eral schools in the U.S., is a way of life. ties, if that’s what you dig. Dartmouth cats nalism departments are popular with stu- Five intense, full, active years of learning. are fairly individualistic in their appearance, dents. A Free U called ‘the Experimental A real sense of community in the college. in a pseudo-hip way. Frat rats spend their College’ teaches classes on wine tasting So many interesting courses: ceramics, time going on ‘road trips’: getting a car and and guerilla warfare. Freaks here are defi- ‘Modern German Literature on the Left,’ driving to one of the girls’ schools such as nitely in the minority; the upper-class ‘Independent Study in Rock Music,’ ‘The Colby, Smith, Radcliffe, or Skidmore. Or slightly hip WASP from the Midwest pre- Chicago Conspiracy Trial,’ and millions of else they have these things called mixers. vails. There’s a lot of loose dating. Most others. There are no grades — only a sys- Then there’s Green Key Weekend, where chicks are sexually liberated but not intel- tem of a professor granting credit or no three thousand chicks come up and get it lectually liberated; they’re out to grab a credit. Tons of freedom in classes; no on with the guys. The chicks in the schools quick husband. The climate is shitting: ‘It’s structure, no meaningless formalities. An- that visit Dartmouth refer to them as ani- cold and freezing and affects your head. tioch students are the essence of hip in the mals. People escape to Union Village Dam It’s like “death point” — all you want to do ‘50s Bohemian way, sort of as you might to swim in the nude.” is stay inside.’” imagine Ginsberg and Ferlinghetti were in their twenties. No dating, just grouping: Florida Michigan ‘Hey, I’m going down to the Little Theatre, University of Florida Michigan State University does anyone want to come?’ Flicks are Fun in the sun. Students can scrounge. “The most perfect expression for this popular, and so is the 6:30 news in Some live in the hip ghetto and sponge off Continued on page 18

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Underground Whole Earth Catalog, Quotations from Checking In with the Mao, and something about Marxism.” Guide to Colleges Classes of ‘71 and ‘73 Continued from page 11 Continued from page 17 University of California at Los Angeles “UCLA is the school of clean hippies. Eve- school is bullshit. A party school, still in the ryone wants to be cool, and they try, but he got divorced. Then one Christmas 1950s. This school is the most pretentious their clothes are the newest hip, and their we exchanged cards, we started see- that we’ve come across. They talk about minds are the plastic hip. When they visit ing each other, and one thing led to their high standards and lofty programs, Berkeley, they are afraid of picking up another." The couple married in when in fact they have neither. This cam- germs. Dudes range from the business- 1987. pus is completely apathetic — it’s amazing, executive majors, who wear wingtips "Don’t make it sound too juicy, considering that University of Michigan, a (loafers without socks in the summer) to though," Janet adds with a laugh. radical center, is so close. ‘As long as you the blatant Hollywood hippie, with wide- make your girl, get your bottle of Ripple, collar shirts from expensive boutiques on "There was really nothing going on and do something “groovy” on the week- Sunset Strip. Chicks come in all different when we were cousins-in-law." end, it’s cool.’ Everyone wears MSU shirts kinds: theater-arts majors wearing tight Although she keeps in touch with or football jerseys with the number 69 on bell-bottoms and expensive boots, sorority quite a few friends, Janet is thrilled them. How daring! Survival here? Chances girls with pantyhose and scarves, colle- to be heading toward another reun- are all right if you don’t think.” giate plain-janes with training bras, and ion. “I find it so uplifting to look back barefoot hippie types. Hips meet at the at my 1971 yearbook and note how Colorado Gypsy Wagon on campus, and squares many people appreciated my hard University of Colorado hang at Mom’s beer joint. ‘There are still work, mentioned my smile, or compli- “The Berkeley of Colorado. The ideal place more here that aren’t with it than are, but mented me on being a true friend,” for students who dig nature, the relaxed things are looking up.’” she reflects. life, dope, sex, and other students. There “They noticed my efforts and are Greeks here, but for the most part it University of Southern California looks like Berkeley: heavy hip types, “USC is a private professionally oriented sent me out into the world with val- mostly freaks. Lots and lots of hair and school with wealthy students and a con- ues and expectations of the kind of beards and fringed leather jackets and old cerned, responsive faculty. Greek Week person I wanted to be. “Mid-life and jeans; chicks without bras wearing all kinds and Song Fests among fraternities and all its challenges — raising teenag- of good stuff. Entertainment is screwing: football games are still big (TGIF). But ers, divorce, illnesses, loss of family ’Your place or mine?’ Boulder is cool, and there’s hope — things are changing. Pres- members — has hit us all, and some- survival is easy. Plenty of drugs, cohabita- sures of conformity to date-and-mate life- times the view of the road ahead tion, heath-food stores, and smiles.” style are great. It’s that L.A. plastic look: appears a little unclear. In order to semi-starlet. Matching threads for the know where you are going, you have California chicks who are pretty straight. The hips to know where you have been.” ■ University of California at Berkeley even wear expensive tailored jeans and Continued on page 19 “Berkeley is a campus community located have had their teeth and eyes fixed. Cats ten miles from San Francisco. It is the have super-short hair, wear slacks with heaviest politically of the UC campuses. shirts tucked in, socks and shoes. USC Revolution is happening everywhere. Sex students think of themselves as represent- JHS CLASS OF and drugs are a way of life, cats and chicks ing the average American. God help us.” are natural looking and wrapped in old 1972 ON THE clothes. People generally prefer to look as Stanford University unprosperous as possible and spend their “The Harvard of the West. Stanford has WORLD WIDE bread on stereo equipment and books. The seen a radical change in recent years from WEB most relevant education can be imbibed a frat-party environment to one of in- just from living in Berkeley. It is a very creased radicalization. The school has a freaky place. The sexual activity is heavy. lot of hip intellectuals. The hip hangout is Be Sure to Visit and Meeting people is easy: at supermarkets, Rozottis, a far-out bar where you can lie in Bookmark Our Official in class, in political organizations, and the back and rap. Straights hang at the laundromats. The Gay Liberation Front is Oasis Bar. Students are sort of rational Class Web Site at active. BC pills and diaphragms are given revolutionaries. They react to issues, like http://www.jhs1972.net out at Planned Parenthood near campus. getting ROTC off campus. Few rock throw- Before you arrive, read Zap Comics, the ers.” ■

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Public Service Announcement Checking In with the Still Like to Rock & Roll? Classes of ‘71 and ‘73 Continued from page 18 Then You’re Gonna Luv This Pat Franklin Jung Do you put on the Allman Broth- chased Graham’s archives and (‘73) ers while doing the ironing? Like and airs them at random. Hear an to secretly play air guitar to Led eclectic array of artists, such as Some people’s path in life Zeppelin II when no one’s watch- Cream, Doors, Jimi, Janis, Stevie resembles a zigzag pat- ing? (By the way, don’t bother Wonder, James Taylor, Broooce!, tern, while others’ is more locking the bedroom door any- Led Zep, Airplane, Miles Davis, of a straight line. Pat more: your spouse and kids have Elvis Costello, Allmans, CSN&Y, Franklin Jung, one of only seen you, and they laugh at you Dylan, Elton, Aretha, Sex Pistols, three teachers of deaf-blind children in the behind your back.) Then you Van Morrison, Floyd, Neil Young, state of Arizona, knew she wanted to work might be interested in Vault Ra- Zappa, and U2. The recordings, with special-needs kids from the time she dio, a new free online “radio sta- made through the sound board, was a teenager. She went charging after tion” of all-live vintage music that are of exceptional quality. Unless her goal as soon as she left Jericho for the was performed at the Fillmores you were there, you haven't heard University of Northern Colorado, earning a East and West, S.F.’s Winterland these performances before. degree in deaf education, only to take a Auditorium, and other venues run Remember, this was back drastic detour in her thirties, then return by the late concert promoter Bill when the stage was where musi- to her first love. Graham. cians honed their talents. Players Pat, who grew up on Saratoga Drive in From 1966 through the could play and singers could sing West Birchwood and now lives in Scotts- 1980s, Graham taped thousands — no lip-synching, no “guide vo- dale, serves children up to age twenty-two of shows. The Web site www. cal” cover-ups, just pure soul, as part of the state’s Deaf-Blind Project. wolfgangsvault.com has pur- musicality, and creativity. ■ "We work with their families, we work in (Below left) Fillmore East schedule in early 1969; (right) poster for a the home, we work in the schools, we train 1968 Jimi Hendrix-John Mayall-Albert King concert teachers and case managers, we train anybody who wants to learn how to work with deaf-blind people. "Because it’s not just deafness, it’s not just blindness, it’s not one plus one equals two. When you've lost both of your learning senses, the defi- cits are multiplied." Asked what she likes best about her work, Pat says, "It’s challenging and differ- ent every day, even if you’re with the same child. You’re constantly having to think. That’s what keeps me going. Plus, I know I do something that few people do." There are only two educators in all of Arizona with a master’s degree in deaf-blind edu- cation. Pat is one of them, having earned her degree (along with four others; the word overachiever springs to mind here) from Michigan State University. After graduating from U. of M. in 1982, Pat decided to move to Phoenix, where her parents had bought a winter home Continued on page 26

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Wanna learn what some of your former teachers are up to? through it, we had our first child, Ste- ven. Then the next year, she got Then drop in, pull up a chair, set a spell, but most of all — pregnant with our daughter, Kim, NO TALKING ! — at the ... and never went back. By 1973, I’d been teaching in the high school for about five years. Al- Fa c u l t y though Jericho was a high-paying district, I felt that I wouldn’t be able to give my children the same educa- Lounge tion that I’d had. I figured I needed to do something else besides teach. Other guys would coach in the after- noon; I decided to become a lawyer. When I applied to St. John’s law school, I requested an interview, which was not the normal course of events. But I was able to get an inter- view with the dean of education. I wanted to explain my track record and the fact that in college at C. W. Post I had been a science major, This Issue: which I thought was harder than a lot of other areas. Mr. Herbert Kramer The dean asked me, “Did you take organic chemistry?” Yes I did. Talk about multitasking. A year after we graduated, science teacher Mr. Her- “What’d you get?” bert Kramer decided to become a lawyer. So he attended law school at St. I explained that there were two John’s University at night — while continuing to teach in Jericho during the semesters. I got an A in one and a B day. Then in 1977, he joined a law firm — while continuing to teach in Jeri- in the other. “Well,” he said, “any- cho. In all, he taught at Jericho from 1963 through 1997, when he finally body who can get an A in organic retired at the age of fifty-five and began practicing law full-time. He is a part- chemistry can certainly finish law ner in the Hauppauge, Long Island, law firm Feldman, Kramer & Monaco. As school. You’re in.” you might suspect, given his thirty-five years in the district, Mr. Kramer thor- Continued on page 21 oughly enjoyed teaching in Jericho (“couldn’t have taught in a better high school anywhere,” he says), starting with his very first day there.

JERICHO WAS MY FIRST TEACHING Ganz, the new music and chorus job. In fact, it was the first job of my teacher. I thought, I’m gonna like adult working life. I began in the jun- teaching here! ior high school. The day before the We started going out and got school year was to start, we had an married in 1965. At the time, we orientation meeting for new teachers were living in a nice garden apart- in what was then the high-school li- ment in Glen Cove, with a big living brary. Later it became the junior-high room for Joan’s piano. The first three library, opposite the auditorium. years we were married, we lived on About sixty or seventy new teachers one of our salaries and banked the were there, because at that time Jeri- other, so that we were able to buy in cho’s population was just going house in St. James. through the roof. In 1970, Joan was fortunate I sat down at one of the tables, enough to obtain a sabbatical, to and sitting across from me was Joan study classical music. Midway

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Mr. Herbert Kramer And the last two years, he’s the most way!” One day a limo takes her to the Continued from page 20 productive lawyer in the office, out- White House. earning everybody. He’s married and Afterward she told me, “It was St. John’s was commutable. So I just built a house on a creek in Matti- dynamite. I’m standing in the Oval would teach during the day, then tuck, on the north fork. Office, the president is about to tape study for a couple of hours and at- Kim is also a lawyer, for the Envi- his Saturday morning radio speech, tend law-school classes from about ronmental Protection Agency. She’s and the subject of the speech is the six-thirty to eight-thirty. Get home by doing a great job there. Of course, project that I was in charge of.” She nine-thirty, say hello to my wife, look I’m talking as a proud father. She’s was standing around with half a in on the kids sleeping, and start all got a master’s in economics, a dozen other people when President over again. bachelor’s in biochemistry, and a law Clinton walked in. Even after I passed the bar exam degree. Just one year into the job, “Dad,” she said, “the man is gor- in 1977, I continued to teach. I was her boss gave her a three-year pro- geous, he sucks all the energy out of lucky to be transferred back to the ject. She finished it in three months. the room, he could have had me junior high school, so I could leave The project was to find a way right then!” That was more informa- an hour earlier. Usually, I’d be done make corporations pay for water. But tion than I really needed to know! with my obligations by around one- it had to be politically correct, be- thirty and be at my office by two. At cause you can’t sock it to the corpo- Trading Up, Not Down first I did mainly real-estate transac- rations. Her idea was to say to the tions. But then the senior partner corporations, You can have all the About six years ago, most of our and I obtained a contract to do legal friends our age were selling their work for members of the teacher’s houses and downsizing to condos union. All teachers in the State of and co-ops. We found a beautiful New York have access to the legal home on two acres on the water in equivalent of Blue Cross/Blue Shield. East Moriches. We got really lucky. Instead of an HMO, it’s like an LMO -- We’d invested well in the stock mar- a legal maintenance organization. ket, and the house was priced right before the real-estate market on Is There a Lawyer in the House? Long Island went nutzoid. I pulled a Three, Actually chunk of money out of the market, just before it went down the tubes, Since practicing law full-time, I do and bought the house, just as the estate planning and elder law: wills housing market went the other way. and trusts, estate tax, Medicaid, So we hit a home run by sheer luck. nursing-home–stuff. It’s an area of This winter was the first we spent the law where you do good things in Florida, in Boca Raton. Joan has Mr. and Mrs. Herbert and Joan and help people. It’s rewarding. My never been a fan of cold weather, (Ganz) Kramer at our thirtieth son, who’s also an attorney, does although she was a phenomenal reunion. Mrs. Kramer still teaches that as well, for my firm. When he got skier; the two of us used to love or- piano privately. out of law school (St. John’s), I asked ganizing ski trips with the kids in Jeri- him what he wanted to do, and he free water you want. But you have to cho. We decided to rent a small said, “I want to replace you.” put back what you took out, drop for condo down there and see if we like I said, “Oh, you want to come to drop. And it has to be put back drink- it. Joan was in Florida all of January, the firm?” I didn’t think it was fair to ing pure, whether you found it filthy February, and March, except for my partners to have him join us with- or not. That’s the cost of doing busi- about three days that she came out any experience. So I set him up ness. Kind of cool, I thought. home to stay in touch with her piano in the city with an outstanding elder- The next thing she knows, she students. law firm. I told him, “Put in three or gets a phone call saying that Presi- I went back and forth, flying four years, and when you know your dent Bill Clinton would like to meet down on Thursday nights and going stuff, we’ll see.” He’s been working her. I jokingly warned her, “If he back Monday mornings. So I guess with us for the past four years now. takes out a cigar, you go the other Continued on page 27

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Original Fiction All About Arlene

S e a s o n s In 1972 I stepped into the teacher’s lounge to have Mr. John Pogany sign my yearbook and got into a what-are- By Arlene Brimer Mailing you-doing-with-your-life? conversation. When Mrs. Broadwin overheard, I stood back to listen to two favor- ite teachers disagree about whether I should follow a math/technical career or a writing/creative one. I’m still deciding. I started out with a statistics de- gree from Cornell University, followed by an MBA from Baruch College. I worked in systems sales at AT&T, then entry copywriting at JCPenney, back to sales forecasting (Lever Brothers) and on to a subsidiary of Brooklyn Un- ion Gas, where I became systems director. All the while, I pined to write fiction. I met my husband, Chris Mailing, in 1984 in the New York Cycle Club. Chris was a button-down banker with wingtips. But he’d been racing bikes since he was fifteen and rode fast. We married in 1986. Two years ago, Chris left the financial world and bought an Evans- ton, Illinois, bike shop called Turin Bicycle. He’s loving it. Back to history: I left Brooklyn Union in 1990 to start TechEase, Inc., my one-person systems company, think- ing I’d have the flexibility to write in between servicing clients. My in-between-clients time increased when we Whatever you do, trample down abuses, and love those moved to Utah to follow Chris’s career. For a while, I who love you. — Voltaire kept New York clients long distance, but I’m not good at

sales, and without a local reputation, it was hard. So I PROLOGUE took a deep breath, let in the beauty of the mountains, 3:30 P.M., Thanksgiving Eve, 1965 and learned to write by writing.

We moved to Chicago in 1995, and I started pub- ovember in New York City isn't fun. Manhat- lishing a few essays, a few articles, then a children’s tan, where I go to art school, or Queens, story in Cricket Magazine. For income, I wrote/edited where I live, it doesn't matter. The sky is the catalogs but was also a resident at an artist’s retreat color of soot, and clumps of dry leaves called Ragdale three times and won an Illinois Arts crackleN on trees when the wind blows, and north, south, Council Fellowship for my fiction in 2000. A month later east, or west, it's always blowing. Sometimes, if I'm not I found out I was pregnant. Our daughter, Hope, now in too much of a rush between my classes and home five, amazes me every day. My writing slowed, but it and my part-time job at McNally's Drug Store, I jump hardly mattered. Anything worth doing is more fun doing high, both hands jabbing my portfolio at the leaves to with her. knock them down, put them out of their misery. New When I was asked to submit something creative to York is no life for elms and oaks. Their trunks vanish the newsletter, I was terrified. Strangers reading my through metal grates, and I feel for their roots, thin and work is one thing, but all of you — you are my history! hairy, blindly stretching for sustenance beneath con- But then I reread the always honest, brave stories of crete and potholes and rumbling tires. your lives in the newsletters and decided to send this But mostly in November, I feel sorry for myself. No prologue from a novel I wrote. It takes place in 1965, matter how tight I wrap my warmest scarf, the pink mo- twenty-eight years before the rest of the story. Although hair one Mrs. Miller knit for me when I was seven, the I wrote it last, it tied up the book for me. I'm mentioning wind finds its way under it to bite my neck. Chin to my this because in fiction, as in life, the past illuminates the chest, my black portfolio, one of those oversized, art- present. We're all writing our lives for ourselves, making student, 24 x 36 inch numbers, tight to my side, I'm al - the best choices we can, counting our blessings. Continued on page 23

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Fiction: “Seasons” to hold an umbrella, so my wool coat It's Mrs. Willis, but her name Continued from page 22 is going to smell like a wet sheep, doesn't matter, because when I Mrs. Miller's scarf, too. I don't make called back, she didn't pick up to ways bracing for a blast of wind at many friends on the subway as is, hear my frantic plea to reschedule, the next corner. I'm only 5'2", so my not with my portfolio goosing them. must have gone home early for the portfolio can turn into a mighty sail if People see it, and head for the next holiday weekend. And I want to work the wind catches it right. door when the train comes. Except for Conner Advertising so bad. Every- Of course, the wind blows in De- it's 3:45, and the RR isn't coming, one at school says that Bryce Conner cember, too, but at least December and I've got to be at 57th and Eighth is the best boss. He pays students offers some glitter, some smiles, a by 4:15 P.M. for the most important well, explains not too much, not too jangling Salvation Army bell, and the interview of my life. I might as well little either, treats you like you have smell of pine in places. Most Novem- sprout wings. something to offer, and has lots of bers don't even have snow. Not that That stupid woman in Student freelance layout work all the time, getting around the city in the snow is Employment called the last minute scheduling around classes and fi- a joy, but if you're outside right when with an appointment for today. Every- nals. it stops, before the slush happens, Now it's 3:55. The first fat, icy the wind is quiet, and the city smells drops are falling. Everyone's backing good, like a snow cone before the up, crowding under the overhang, so syrup. I can't pace anymore. A lady, rocking But here it is the day before a stroller is inching away from me. Thanksgiving — a whole week of No- She should only know about portfo- vember left — and I'm pacing the lios, how I'm dreading the Manhattan platform of the RR train at Hoyt Ave- wind. It's especially bad when a nue in Astoria, wincing at the sky in short, say, ten story building, maybe the direction of LaGuardia. I know from the turn-of-the-century with ro- that sky, having lived the other side coco cornices, sits between two fifty - of Grand Central Parkway from the or sixty-floor buildings. Then I have to airport all eighteen years of my life, hold tight to my portfolio. And I'm not and there's a storm brewing in the even sure I tossed in my best work east. It's roiling in from the ocean. as I was dialing Mrs. Willis. I am sure New Yorkers don't talk about how I didn’t have time to comb my tan- close we are to the Atlantic, maybe gled mess of curls. No one wants to they forget, but these anthracite hire a slob; I’d be better off going clouds obscuring the usual soot color one's got a plane to catch, a train home, burrowing under my blanket, of the sky are streaked with irides- that won't wait, or a turkey that and sleeping until Charcoals, my first cent white and under lit by quinacri- needs basting. And she gave me less class Monday morning. I'd do well to done gold. Mr. Hasdale would have than an hour and a half to get to miss Mother's Thanksgiving table. my head for painting a sky like what Conner Advertising after my shift It'd save me from cooking, and, be- I'm seeing. He'd rap the leg of my ends at McNally's Drug Store. I’ve sides, ever since Spencer an- stool with the wood of the number already spent twenty-five minutes of nounced that he's bringing a boy- 20 brush that he's always twirling. it on the bus getting to the el. She friend this year, Mother's been rant- “Miss Kate, you've got to learn the had my work schedule. You'd think ing that unless my brother goes rules before you break them. Those she lived on Mars, didn't know rush straight, Father will pull his college colors are fake. Fake. Fake. Fake.” hour from Russia. Plus, she leaves finances, forcing him into the draft. Just goes to show that some the message with Mother. It's in my Except that Spence is going to de- teachers are clueless. But I don't file, to please not leave any impor- sign school on scholarship, so need Mr. Hasdale to teach me about tant news with anyone but me. I'm Mother's full of hot air. But, boy, can these clouds. Swelled with fury, lucky that Mother bothered to men- her spouting ruin a meal. they're going to spit rain, harder and tion as I walked in, bleary from ring- An RR train screeches into the colder than snow, at my face. With ing the cash register at McNally’s, station. I lift my free hand to cover at my portfolio at my hip, there's no way that a Mrs. Williams had phoned. Continued on page 24

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Fiction: “Seasons” onds to figure out that my back isn't ette back to the corner. I waste a Continued from page 23 broken, and my kidneys aren't sev- long time on that corner. Many peo- ered. I gather myself, climb to the ple pass me, dive into the street. least one ear and am swept inside street, and hugging my work, huddle Some wait, including a woman, who with the crowd. I’m shoved to the into the wind, wishing I’d had the appears next to me carrying a little center of the car, and the front edge cash to splurge on the waterproof girl, who’s maybe six. The child’s got of my portfolio presses into a seated artist case that guaranteed total dry- her face buried in her mother’s neck. man. I start to apologize but see that ness inside. Over the car horns and the rain and he's wearing two knit hats, one or- I'm soaked before I can figure wind, I hear the kid crying. I don’t ange, one red, both filthy, and his out which side of Seventh Avenue think. I step off the curb and lead. eyes are shut. Smelling like a dead That girl needs to get out of the rain. skunk, he's smiling as my black slab Mother and daughter make a of vinyl presses between his legs. I right, head up Seventh Avenue. I go try backing up. That lasts until the straight. The wind is coming off the next stop. At 30th Avenue and every Hudson, and 57th Street is a tunnel. stop after, I get more and more In another ten yards, I turn around, pushed over him, until a platform full try walking backward. It's like I'm of people crowd on at Queensboro standing still. The rain isn't just un- Plaza, so that I’m dangling from the der my scarf; it's under my skin, icing metal loop above him, trying not to my spine. I'm wondering if I'm going breathe his aroma. to make it another block and a half That’s when the train stops. by five, the time Conner Advertising We're under the East River, and the probably closes. I wonder if I'm going lights go out. No one in my car both- to make it all. ers to groan. The train jerks to life, I turn forward, push to the other only to stop in another hundred feet. side of Broadway, saying my thanks This goes on about thirty times. It's that there's no thunder in this storm. one of those rides that's a test of I hate thunder. Nose to my chest, I your mettle. If you get out the other know I'm making progress when I end, you’re stronger for the journey. I've come up on. It's dark already, pass the display outside The Art Stu- I'm not a superstitious person, but and the street might as well be un- dent's League building. The League's there's got to be something good for der water. The rain ripping into my been around since 1875. Its school me at the end of this Wednesday face hurts, so, eyes down, I follow has a stellar reputation. before Thanksgiving. Something someone, gender unknown, wearing So I'm struggling forward, trying grand. short, black rubber boots to 57th to figure out why Bryce Conner is I do get out the other side at Street. A New Yorker in sensible foot- bothering to interview me with the 57th Street — at 4:50! I fly out of the wear will forge a good path. Me, I pick of Manhattan's best a block car, bound up the stairs, and the have on my interview pumps, my away, when the wind changes direc- wind nails my portfolio. A gust whips soaked, good, black leather, inter- tion, gets behind me, and I fly the me 180 degrees and slams me into view pumps. rest of the way, braking with every- the banister. My back hits the hand- This tack lasts until the corner; thing I've got so as not to pass the rail hard. The portfolio? It's sailing smart-shoes is going south, crossing building. into a man behind me in cashmere. to Carnegie Hall. I'm continuing west I'm on the elevator, panting, floor He gets it in his chest. into the wind, but there’s a major 20 is pressed. I don't remember the “This yours?” he asks, shoving it traffic jam, horns blasting, and I’m lobby; only that it was nondescript at me. terrified to zigzag between stopped and deserted, no doorman, no guard, I can't answer. I have no breath. cars, their windshield wipers flapping with just a bank of elevators. It takes Rain is pelting my face, and I'm not faster than helicopter propellers and ten floors for me to trust that I'm out even on the street yet. I've got five their fat tires shiny wet with grime. of the rain and mop water from my steps left to climb, but it takes Coward I am, I get as far as a blue eyes, not that my wet wool sleeve maybe twenty more precious sec- Dart, slap its rear fender and pirou- Continue on page 25

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Fiction: “Seasons” lower to the floor, sit cross-legged. gives me a key for the lady's room, Continued from page 24 My wet, frozen fingers cover my face. suggests I use the hand dryer. "I'll tell I'm shaking. Bryce you're here. Don't come out does much. But that's what I'm doing Next thing I know, the lady has until you're dry." when the door slides open on 20. returned and draped a towel on my The bathroom is black marble I step out. To the right is a wall, head and is blotting my hair. "We and chrome. There's a window out to so I turn left. There's another wall, always have towels," she's saying. 57th Street. I'm shivering, watching this one of glass. You know there's a "At least once a day, Bryce spills cof- the angry sky; the heat from the door in it because of the black rec- fee or turpentine or something." hand dryer on my sleeve is pointless. tangles that are handles and be- She's tugging off my wet wool coat, It'll be all over once Mr. Conner finds cause Conner Advertising, Inc. in getting me to my feet, leading me to out I'm not business savvy either. Optima italic is etched, also in black, the white leather, insisting a cow's About fifteen minutes later, the on it. hide can stand a little water. lady comes in with another stack of I learned about Optima in my "Bryce didn't listen," she says. "I towels and a pair of shoes. "I'm size typeface class: how in 1950 its de- told him the forecast was bad, told eight. Think these might fit you?" signer, Hermann Zapf, didn't have him to see you next week." She She holds up a pair of moccasins, paper with him, so he sketched let- wraps two towels around my shoul- beaded with turquoise across the ters from grave plates in Florence ders, lays another across my lap. fringes, and I remember the full de- onto a 1,000 lire note. Didn't have "Look at you, Kate. I'm sorry." scription of the Optima typeface that paper. I loved it. I'm clutching the lady's towels, I crammed for my midterm: clear, Behind Conner's Optima logo, a my cloak of ermine. "You don't have simple, and elegant, yet warmly hu- lady at a reception desk notices me. to do this," I say. man. She stands. Her eyes widen. She's "Nonsense." "You're very nice," I say, my eyes maybe late thirties, with auburn hair "Why," I ask, "doesn't he hire an to the mosaic floor, a rose pattern of swept into a twist. I want to hide in Art Student's League grad?" I release black, white, and gray. Zapf's graveyard in Florence, be any- the tip of one finger from the towels "You're very wet," she says. "I feel where but here. Even through the and point toward 215 West 57th. responsible." glass, I can see this woman doesn't "It's right there." That's when I start apologizing have a hair out of place. And she's "No practical training," she says. for being so late, keeping them there dry. Hands on her desk, she "They're not business savvy." She Continued on page 26 stretches across it to better see me. She's angled at the same slant as Author Arlene with husband the Italic letters etched on the glass Chris Mailing , daughter Hope, door. With her slender neck craned and cat Sylvie and her chin and strong jaw in pro- file, she's an Optima P. What a strange thought, but I memorized Optima's attributes for my midterm: clear, simple, and elegant. On the wall behind the simple and elegant lady, a clock two feet across with black enamel Optima numbers reads, 5:15. An hour late! The lady is charging around her desk, passing white leather chairs. She swings open the glass door. “Kate Stromley? Don't move.” As if I could. My chin is dripping, but I can't lift my hand to wipe it. My arms can't even hold my portfolio. It slips to the gray carpet. So do I. I

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Fiction: “Seasons” Checking In with the Continued from page 25 Classes of ‘71 and ‘73 the night before a long holiday. “Not Continued from page 19 allowed," she says, shaking her head. She has a dancer's neck, slow with the intention of eventually retir- and strong. "Bryce will be here an- ing there. She started the first pre- other three hours. Minimum." school class for deaf-blind children in "And you?" Phoenix, at the Foundation for Blind "If he's here," she whispers, "I am Children. too." Now here comes the zig and the She's in love with him. It's in her zag part. hands, the way she just bent the "Out of the blue, in 1984 I de- wrists, showing me her palms, as if cided to open a restaurant! I’d just in willing submission. Her fingers are had it, not with teaching but with the long, the nails tapered. politics of education "So quit your worrying," she says. in this state. I was just fried. So I "You're kind," I say, noticing that just decided to beat myself up and her eyes are a clear Paynes gray. open up a restaurant. It was a New Pat Franklin Jung with husband "Get used to it," she says and York-style Jewish Deli called Tradition Brian and daughter Michelle. laughs. Restaurant. We made everything I'm confused; don't like being from scratch; we flew in our fish from ketball in France for several years laughed at. New York; we had our corned beef before returning to Arizona (he’s "You left your portfolio out there," and pastrami made here locally. We originally from Tucson) and going she says. "I peeked. I know Bryce; had bagels made locally by a New into business. The couple married in he'll like it." York-style bagel place. But everything 1999. I wear five and a halves, so I fol- else we made on the premises." "We had a lot in common," Pat low her back to the lobby, my inter- Eight years into what was a highly says. "He’d never been married, I’d view shoes squeaking. She's at least successful run, "I realized that I had never been married. We both like to a head taller than me. She points to no life outside the restaurant. I hiking, travel, and keep in shape. We another white leather chair. "That worked every single day, probably decided that we wanted to have chil- one's dry." seventy hours a week. The only days dren, and three years ago we I sit on the edge of the plush we were closed was for two Jewish adopted a daughter, Michelle, at leather and when I look up, she's holidays. It was just exhausting. I birth, locally. standing over me, offering me what knew I wanted to back to education." “Obviously there are benefits and looks like pale tea in a mug that says Pat sold the restaurant in 1992. some hazards to having a child late Conner Advertising on it in black Op- "Once I left the restaurant business, I in life," she reflects, "but I think the tima. knew I needed to find a life for my- best part is, you’ve had a chance to "It's from my garden, mostly self, and I joined a couple of singles do so much that you know you want chamomile this year," she says and groups, like a hiking club, a tennis to have a child; you know what steps back. league, and a gourmet restaurant you’re ready for." I smell the steam, take a sip. I'm club." That’s where she met her hus- Not that Pat is totally done with drinking perfumed apples. It's the band, Brian Jung, in 1996. what she calls "all the crazy stuff." perfect temperature, and she lets Brian stood out in the crowd. Really "It was always a long-standing me drink another sip before handing really stood out. He’s 6'11" and a goal of mine to climb Mount Kiliman- me a glossy volume. former basketball star for Northwest- jaro by the time I was fifty. Michelle "The other artists waiting for in- ern University. The Boston Celtics was only two last year, so it wasn’t terviews love this," she says and drafted him in 1980 along with Kevin the right time." But this summer walks through an inner door to what McHale. "Unfortunately," Pat says, she’ll be off to Kenya for a few must be the offices, leaving me to laughing, "he was up against a guy weeks, "as a belated fiftieth birthday Continued on page 27 named Larry Bird." Brian played bas- present to myself." ■

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Fiction: “Seasons” pleasant, I can see it in his smile, but I walk to Mr. Conner and can see Continued from page 26 it's surface. He's a lady's man, inside to where he’s spread my sam- smooth, and when he reaches me to ple ads on a round table. Turning finish the tea and leaf through a shake my hand, I smell his cologne. back to the reception area, I stare at book of nineteenth-century Salon It's woodsy, nice, but strong. the lady's feet. Her size eight pumps paintings, liking how she called me "Hi, Kate," he says, "heard you're aren't too different from my soaked an artist, but not believing she knows a trouper. Come in; we'll talk for a interview shoes. How do you thank a her boss's taste well enough for me few minutes, then get you a taxi person for being nice, for making you to think he'll hire me. home." He returns to the door, opens feel welcome? "I'm sorry," I say. "I I stop turning pages at an 1880 it. don't know your name." oil on canvas by Pierre Auguste Cot, I bring the mug and the book of "You don't!" she says, getting up. The Storm. He called that a storm? I Salon paintings to the lady's desk. In two steps, she’s reached Bryce ease into the chair to study the "Thanks. Chamomile, you said?" Conner and me and with lean, strong young couple fleeing a sun shower, a "They're a tiny, daisylike flower." fingers, takes my hand. Her hand is billowy cloak over their heads, when She holds her thumb and forefinger warm, and I see that her Paynes gray the inner door opens. about a quarter inch apart. "I dry eyes are outlined with a fine brush in A man with silver in his side- them." ivory black. burns, wearing a shiny, Italian-cut I nod. I know nothing about gar- "I'm sorry, Kate. How rude of suit, holds the door for the lady, who dening. me." I see the laugh lines deepen goes to her reception desk. He "Stuff newspaper in your shoes around her eyes. watches her sit, then grins at me. when you get home," she says. "So "My name is Selma," she says. "I She shouldn't love this guy. He's the leather won't shrink." hope you get the job." ■

Mr. Herbert Kramer want to take marine biology, and Locating the Class of ‘72 Continued from page 21 you’re willing to teach it, fine. That was Jericho. It was innova- that makes her a snowbird and me a tive, they would take a shot at new We’ve found all class members snowflake. I can take a 7:00 AM things, and it was a good learning except for these seventeen folks. flight from Florida and be at my desk environment. But the main reason If you have any idea where they by 9:45. that Jericho was always a top-notch or their family might be, or any school was the kids. Great kids, with other relevant information, Attention: Don’t Get a Swelled Head a lot on the ball and fun to be please let us know. around. I always used to say it was In the late sixties and early seven- due to good genetics. And if a kid Georgene Borgess ties, I think that Jericho was the best wasn’t succeeding, Mom and Pop Grainger Cole public school in the world and was as were in there trying to find out how Juliet Cucco good as any private school. I always they could help, but not in adversar- Joseph Esposito had very small classes. I think the ial way. Olivia Fairfield Steven Gross maximum class size I ever had was I remember those years with tre- Randy Haas twenty-four kids. I probably averaged mendous fondness and pride. I’ll tell Billy Hartley seventeen, eighteen kids in a sec- you: A lot of friends of mine taught in Judy Lubitz tion. I had classes of five and six, other districts. Levittown, Wantagh, Bea Mari because there was interest in elect- Huntington. They didn’t even come David Meadow ives, and they said, Sure, if six kids close to Jericho. In my years there, I James Rorer know that kids would come out of Ayda Saydan Jericho and apply to the Harvards Laurie Siegel and the Yales, and I always thought “The main reason Jericho Barbara Simpson was always a top-notch that they had an advantage. Those Emma Snow school was the kids.” colleges knew that Jericho was Sam Turetsky different. ■

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Donna Flynn Kordecki Fan Mail and Reunion in 3-D Continued from page 1 Continued from page 2 Threatening My Three Sons Letters Your Reunion Committee “We Sweat School Spirit!” We have a fifteen-year-old, Billy; and

the twins, Mikey and A.J., who are Our apologies for having only these current snapshots of the thirteen. They’re fraternal twins, not “Comments? committee — couldn’t find their identical. Billy and A.J. are really into Feedback? yearbook photos anywhere. those online video games. I’ll tell Fan mail you: It’s a sickness. And Mikey is a from some typical boy; he loves to run around flounder?” and play basketball, paintball, all that kind of stuff. Before I become a mom, I had Back in Town some interesting jobs. I did human resources at Creedmoor Psychiatric Thanks for your work on the newsletter. Center, in Queens, which I loved. It’s fun reading about some of my Then, for a short time in 1980, I was "younger" friends. Funny how one one of the few women working on year back then was such a big deal. Beth Cathy the Long Island Railroad as a train- Now we are all over fifty anyway!!! man. You have to be a trainman for — Elaine Zetlin Lotfi (1971) five years before you become a con- Jericho, NY

ductor. And that was horrible. For the [email protected] first year, they put you on call, which means getting calls at two o’clock in P.S.: Yeah, I moved back and put my the morning telling you the run you’ll kids through the same shit! be on, like ‘Jamaica to Dix Hills,’ or wherever. I used to wind up working in the middle of the night. I can re- been friends since seventh grade. Ilene Janet member sitting outside in Wyan- She also lives in Florida, but on the danch at 2:00 a.m., all by myself, West Coast. My brother, Richard, waiting for the train. And I’m carrying lives in Maryland, right outside of money, because all the ticket booths Washington, and my two sisters, are closed at that hour. I lasted Ellen and Marianne, are still in New three days. York. My parents live there in the I also waitressed for a while at summertime, on the Long Island one of Brent Gindel’s [1973] restau- Sound, then spend the winters near rants. It was called the Peculiar Pen- us, in Satellite Beach. Larry Linda guin (!), on Jericho Turnpike, and a After we moved to Florida, we lot of people from Jericho worked used to go back to Long Island to there, like Scott Friedman from the visit. But for all five of us to fly up class of ‘73. Oh, God, that place was there and rent a car, then spend the wild! We used to have a ball there. whole time running around like nuts, trying to visit everyone — it’s not a Connections vacation to me. It’s ... horrible! We are coming up in May, though, be- I keep in touch with Scott, Tommy, cause we have a wedding to go to. and Frankie, Scott and Pam Singer, But this time we’re going to combine Mitchell Sugarman, and, of course, it with a trip out to Montauk. At least Lorraine Phil Monica Wood; Monica and I have now it’s a vacation. ■

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Your Back Pages “I was so much older then, I’m younger than that now.” — Bob Dylan You wish!

The World Around You • Third Grade, 1962─63

♦ The big news from third grade was that we all came this close to ending up as piles of cinders. On Monday, October, 22, 1962, President John F. Kennedy went on TV at 7 PM to inform the country of a recently discovered Russian military buildup in Cuba — including the installation of offensive nuclear missiles. In response, the United States Navy would block and turn back any Soviet ship found to contain military equipment bound for Cuba. Kennedy had rejected the more provocative action of a surgical air strike against the bases. Among the president’s remarks: “It shall be the policy of JFK addresses the nation. this nation to regard any nuclear missile launched from Cuba against any nation in the Western Hemisphere as an attack by the Soviet Union on the United States, requiring a full retaliatory response upon the Soviet Union … I call upon Chairman Khrushchev to halt and eliminate this clandestine, reckless and provocative threat to world peace and to stable relations between our two nations. I call upon him fur- ther to abandon this course of world domination, and to join in an historic effort to end the perilous arms race and to transform the history of man. He has an opportunity now to move the world back from the abyss of destruction.” Fortunately, the So- viet Union did back down and quickly dismantled its missile sites, which were just ninety miles southeast of Florida. Map showing range of Soviet ♦ The Long Island Expressway reaches the Suffolk County line missiles. Yikes! ten years after construction began near the Queens-Midtown Tunnel. Developer Robert Moses originally estimated that the “Central Motor Expressway,” as it was to be called, would be completed by 1958. In fact, it took until June 1972 before the last exit, at Riverhead, was built. The entire project cost $280 million and resulted in 10,000 homes being relocated or demolished. ♦ In November, Pat Brown defeats Richard Nixon for the governorship of California, leading Nixon to remark bitterly to the press, “You won’t have Richard Nixon to kick around anymore.” If only. ♦ A first-class postage stamp sets you back four cents. Continued on next page

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Your Back Pages The World Around You • Third Grade, 1962─63

Continued from previous page

On the Radio: Four Seasons, “Big Girls Don’t Cry” • Tornadoes, “Telstar” • Rooftop Singers, “Walk Right In” • Paul and Paula, “Hey Paula” • Chiffons, “He’s So Fine” • Leslie Gore, “It’s My Party” • Little Peggy March, “I Will Follow Him” • Crystals, “He’s a Rebel” • Bobby “Boris” Pickett, “Monster Mash” • Ruby and the Romantics, “Our Day Will Come” • Kyu Sakamoto, “Sukiyaki”

On the BIG SCREEN: Lawrence of Arabia • Dr. No • The Jersey boys: the Four Seasons Longest Day • Days of Wine and Roses • The Manchurian Candidate • What Ever Happened to Baby Jane? • The Birds • Cleopatra

On the tube: Johnny Carson replaces Jack Paar as host of the “The Tonight Show” • “The French Chef with Julia Child” debuts on educational television • Top shows include “Hazel,” “The Defenders,” “The Andy Griffith Show,” “Ben Casey,” and “The Andy Williams Show.”

In Sports: ♦ Despite .120 and .174 batting marks from Mickey Mantle and Roger Maris, the New York Yankees fend off the San Francisco Giants four games to three in a hard-fought World Series. Twenty-three-game-winner Ralph Terry notches a 1–0 shutout in game seven and survives a heart-pounding bottom- of-the-ninth threat: With Matty Alou on third and Willie Mays on second, and two down, Willie McCovey launches a vicious line drive toward right, but sec- ond baseman Bobby Richardson calmly snares the ball. It’s the Yanks’ nine- teenth World Championship — but their last until 1977. ♦ The Green Bay Packers beat the New York Giants 16─7 for the NFL cham- pionship. Jints’ stars include Y. A. Tittle, Frank Gifford, Del Shofner, Rosey Grier, Sam Huff, and Andy Robustelli. In the AFL, it’s an all-Texas champion- ship game, as the Dallas Texans squeak by the Houston Oilers, 20─17. The Series MVP Ralph Terry gets hoisted Texans move to Kansas City the following season and become the Chiefs. aloft after shutting ♦ Boston Celtics’ star Bob Cousy retires on a high note, pacing his team to out the Giants in a the National Basketball Association title. thrilling game seven. ♦ In hockey, the Chicago Black Hawks skate to the Stanley Cup by beating the Detroit Red Wings in six games.