To the person that I love the most,

Thank you for always believing in me and supporting me in everything I do. I wouldn’t have accomplished as much as I have if it wasn’t for you.

Uno

The temperature in Florence was starting to drop, I fucking hated the cold. I was driving to Parco Delle Cascine, it was her favourite park here. How I missed her smile that filled me up with joy when I just saw her a few days ago, I never thought this would happen, especially not today. Not on our Anniversary. I parked up the road nearby, and went inside the park at one in the morning. I slide my hands in my jacket, walking alone in this park. I wasn’t with her this time, I wasn’t holding her hand or looking at her. I was alone. The street lights were open and there were leaves all over the walk way, I was slowly heading to the bench where me and her always sat on, where we’d look at random strangers and talk about what we thought about them. I miss her laugh. She’s in the hospital, how in the world did she end up in a comma? I laughed at myself thinking she might not even survive this. Seeing her was already painful enough. I look up to the empty park, and sighed. Bullshit. This was complete bullshit. She didn’t deserve this, it’s been 3yrs since I met her, and frankly, it was as clear as motion picture in my head. 3 years ago at the Bargello Museum. I was there cause I found a certain appreciation in art recently, I was 18. I was alone, it was summer and the temperature was so appealing to me. I was there looking around, tourists were flooding all over the place and I honestly was annoyed. Girls staring, parents talking some shit, I couldn’t find any appreciation in this right now. I just bolted through everyone, until I found a small room where no one was in. Finally. I was staring at the work, then a skinny, tan, dark-browned hair foreigner came in and I thought to myself, great. I didn’t get a good look at her face, I was just annoyed by her presence already. She was holding an old camera where you still use film, and she looked lost. When I turned around I accidentally pushed her back causing her to hit an old ass vase and break, I looked at her and smiled. She looked like she just shit bricks. “Oh crap.” She looked at me and then the broken, priceless artefact on the floor. “I’m so sorry,” I said, laughing so hard, you should’ve seen her face. She looked like she just committed a crime, I guess we did.. But I couldn’t help but laugh. There we were standing above the broken vase and I looked at her for a moment and saw her face. I caught her eye and then I stopped laughing. Out of nowhere an old man, a guard, came running toward us. “Hey you two!” I realized he was coming for us, I grabbed her hand and ran with her, she didn’t know exactly what was going on but I did. She was laughing, holding her camera, and I was running towards the way out. I was screaming for people to get out the way for a clean exit. We ran through the streets of Florence on a hot summer day and by the time I thought we were safe, I stopped. We were both out of breathe and I thought to myself that I needed to work out again. “Are you okay?” I asked her, looking at her as the sun hits her face, getting a good look at her. She was smiling completely out of breathe. “Yeah, I am. What was that?” “I don’t think you wanna get fined for a first timer here.” “Thanks.” She smiled and suddenly we were normal. The world stopped for a moment. We started walking side by side, and I didn’t realize I was still holding her hand, dumb fuck, right? So I let go, and faced her. “I’m Alfonso” I smiled, bringing out my hand waiting for her. She looked at me first and smiled back. “Claudia.” Then a wave of cold air hit me, I was reminiscing in the past right now, I was back in the park, alone. It wasn’t summer, I wasn’t with her, but I was thinking of that summer. The summer where everything changed. The summer where I met Claudia Almeida. The girl in the hospital.

DUE

It was the first week of June, and summer had just begun for the most of us. I glance at her again, watching her take pictures of pointless things using her camera which is probably from the 60s. God, she’s such a tourist. I can never really stand foreigners, or just being around too many people. She puts her camera away and catches me staring at her. She gives me this gentle smile, almost child-like in a way, yet I can’t help but smile back. What is it about her that doesn’t make me feel so annoyed like I did when she first entered the room in the museum? “I guess we can’t go back there now, huh,” She asks while she rummages through her bag. “Yeah, I guess we can’t. Not unless you want to get fined.” “Uh, yeah I don’t think I want to on my first day here. I should probably call my parents if I could just find…..” She hastily brings all of her things out of her bag and sits on the ground. Girls. I will never understand why they bring so much. “Aha! There you are!” She takes her phone out and starts dialing. I observe her carefully this time. She has a golden sun-kissed tan, small-boned and fit for someone who lives in America, okay that was kinda racist.. Her accent was strong enough that I didn’t even need to ask where she was from. I couldn’t help but notice how long her legs looked in that navy blue dress; she was about five foot seven or eight, pretty short beside me. Typical American height. She had brown eyes which turn lighter when stricken by sunlight, along with her dark brown hair that falls below her chest. She was actually prettier than I thought. But god her voice was getting annoying. She puts the phone down and turns around to look at me. She smiles again like it’s a natural thing for her to do. She glances at the ground, murmuring something that I can’t really understand, then looks up at me and asks hesitantly, “Hey, I know we just met but uhm.. I was wondering.. If.. You’re busy? I mean, if you have somewhere else to go.” “What made you ask?” “I’ll answer if you answer.” She says in a shy tone. “Well, actually no. I don’t have any plans today. Your turn to answer.” She looks at me with a half smile, “I told my parents that I can’t go back to meet them at the museum and said to them that I’ll meet them somewhere else instead. I know it’s awkward because we just met. But do you mind going with me?” “Oh of course, I don’t mind. It would be nice to kill some time anyway. And you’re a noob here, I wouldn’t wanna be accused of a missing American, right?” I chuckled a bit. Wouldn’t mind? What the fuck was that? I’m going to have dinner with a complete stranger and her family. Don’t forget the fact she’s an American who smiles too much. Why. Yes, I totally wouldn’t mind, not one bit you cunt. “Yay, Great! That’s so kind of you. I appreciate it, really.” Her reaction to my saying yes to her made me look at her like she’s such a kid, but in a cute way. About 15 minutes later, we were already waiting in front of Ristorante la Giostra for her parents. What was I doing? We would’ve gotten here faster but we weren’t in a rush anyway. I actually think that I’ve completely lost it though. I’m going to have dinner with a girl that I just met, at one of the best restaurants in town, with her family. That doesn’t sound crazy at all. It’s almost six in the evening. Claudia and I are waiting inside the restaurant while her parents are on her way here. She braided her hair to the side and put a red headband on. I couldn’t help but notice how she looked better that way. She’s unlike the rest of the girls in my school, putting make up on like they’re some kind of clown. But I honestly don’t know what has gotten into me. Claudia’s phone rings as the waiter hands the menu to us. I look over the menu while secretly eavesdropping on the conversation of course. After a few minutes she put the phone down and looks at me with sorry eyes. “So, that was my dad. He said they couldn’t make it here because his business partner offered them dinner at last minute. Do you wanna go already or…” Phew, what a relief. Thank God for that business partner. I was actually scared of meeting this girl’s parents so soon. I said to her with a smile, “I’m kind of hungry already but this place is too pricey for me. Would you like to go somewhere else instead?” She gave me a sweet smile and nods. We walked back to the museum where my car was parked, and drove off to the nearest pizzeria. I ordered us a box of pizza and some gelato too. We managed to get to know each other more the whole afternoon we were together. Americans are actually not as bad as I thought they would be, at least some of them. I got issues with Foreigners… After some more time of conversing, we were on our way back to my car to drop her off home. She wasn’t staying far from my apartment, and I felt like that was a good thing. I never enjoyed anyone’s company as much as I enjoyed hers. Now I feel like I’m completely lost. Earlier this afternoon, I was so annoyed by everyone and now I’m actually enjoying having someone around. Fuck, I need someone to explain this to me. We were almost near to her place. She was still not finished with her gelato as I pull up the driveway. I quietly laugh about the fact that she eats so slow. I put my car on park and look at her, “Today has been very.. Unexpected.” “Yes, it has.” She looked at me and giggled. Don’t say it, Alfonso. Don’t. She’s only here for vacation and you’ll never see her again after. This is nothing. All you did was help her today. Shut your m…. “Hey Claudia?” She was still looking at me with that smile on her face. “Yeah?” Damn you, Alfonso. This is nothing, don’t do it. She’s just some chick you helped get out of trouble. “Do you wanna keep in touch or something? I don’t really have much to do this summer and…” Fuck you man.. She looks at me in shock and cuts me off, “I would love to! It’s nice to have friends around here too you know. Makes the stay less boring.” We exchanged phones and saved our numbers. I gave her phone back and smiled at her while I stepped out of the car to open her door. She grabbed her bag and walked towards her front door, then turns around to look at me. “I had a great time with you today. Thank you for saving me from trouble earlier, and for having an unexpected date with a complete stranger.” There she goes with one of her sweet smiles again. I’ve actually grown fond of that smile. “It was my pleasure. It definitely was a different experience for me too.” More than you could ever imagine. “Well I hope I get to see you soon again.” She adds before she enters her house. I gazed in her eyes and knew she meant it. “Soon.”

TRE

I hadn’t seen her in days, and it was a good thing really. I didn’t need some girl who would just go back to her country anyway; I just didn’t need that right now. I was keeping myself pre-occupied by prepping myself for college and it was working. I stayed in my apartment today, and I was just bumming around like a lazy fool, until my phone rang. I checked it out and it was a message from one of my high-school buds. “Party at the rooftop near the pier, let’s go get ‘em boy!” I looked around for a minute and sighed thinking that maybe I should ask her to go with me, she would enjoy it, but I shook my head and replied, “Pick you up at 8.” As the day crept away, I was getting ready making sure everything in my apartment was set, and ready for me to leave. I changed into a black v- neck and some denim jeans, finding my vans. By the time I got out, I drove pass her place and I thought that I should visit her, see how she is, and how she likes Florence. What are you doing? Stop bombarding yourself with some girl, she’s just a girl, get over it you ignoramus! By the time I was in the party, everything was a blur, being around a lot of people makes my head spin, I took a shot to ease the blur and my friends were already scattered across the room doing god knows what. I was staying near the edge of the roof looking at the ocean being lit by the moonlight, trying to hear the waves crash over the roaring party music, and time passed, I was left alone in my own little world. “Hey Fonso!” A girl with a familiar voice said. I turned, I thought it was her but no. “Hey Dianne.” “Dance with me!!” She said smiling looking like some kind of used chick in her skimpy black dress, and her face completely looking like a mess. “I’ll pass” I said, grinning. Being in a crowded area such as a dance floor is something I cannot take. I especially didn’t wanna dance with someone who looks like they’re about to go to work in a pole dancing club. She walked away looking at other people to dance around with and she scored my friend, I chuckled thinking of how he just wants to get some by the end of the night. He looked at me and gave me a nod and I nodded back and gave him a fast thumbs up. I was amused with this.

As the night drew on, I still wasn’t drinking hard enough to get tipsy but drinking beer all night won’t really do the trick now would it? I started drinking shots now, I started to feel the haze in my head kicking in, until. I heard giggling. The giggle that made my head kind of sting, it was a giggle that was just so familiar to me. I turned around looking from where it was coming from, there in the corner of the rooftop I found her, in a coral summer dress. Her hair fell so perfect. I saw some stranger going up against her, her face was red. Was she drunk? Maybe she was a typical.. Maybe I was wrong. I started walking away thinking of how incredibly stupid I am, after a few seconds I started hearing signs of struggles. Her giggles faded and turned into something that wasn’t so pleasant to hear. I faced back looking at this guy forcing her to go somewhere with her, obviously we know what this means. I started walking towards them and saw that she was getting hurt from the grip of his hands and I rushed. “Hey man, let her go” My hands were in my pockets and walking towards him as he stopped pushing and when she saw me I didn’t bother looking at her. “Who the fuck are you?” He said, still holding her wrists from behind her. “Just let her go you dipshit.” I raised my voice; I didn’t need this kind of bullshit right now. I wanted to get this over with. “No, now go along and leave us alone. Unless you want trouble.” I laughed. “Me? Want trouble? That’s funny.” He pushed her down to the floor, she was kneeling still looking at me, face red, and she probably felt nauseous by now from all the booze. He moved toward me face to face. “Leave.” Now. I was angry. I gave him a punch to his face, and when I saw him unbalanced I pushed him against the edge of the roof deck holding him by his neck and he was scared, looking at me with such terror. “You leave, you little fucker, now, how do you wanna leave? Through death? Or through the door?” I pushed him a little back more for the sensation of falling. She looked at me horrified, and I looked back with my eyes just filled with anger. “Get off me man let me go!” Now he was struggling by the time I heard it, I couldn’t help but grin. I let go of him and pushed him to the floor. Looking at him and gave him a kick to the stomach, and looked at her, then bolted out. I heard my name, being said out loud, but I was getting a bit dizzy from all the adrenaline, from all the rush coming through my veins. I was on the road, and there wasn’t anyone there, I opened my car and then turned around. “Alfonso!” I looked at her, I was sweating I could feel it drip down on my face and she was trembling she was scared. I felt it from the look on her face. I was about to say something until she vomited all over the road and fell into my arms like the drunkard she was. I sighed and shook my head. I carried her into my car and started driving off.

She was in my car sleeping from passing out, and I didn’t exactly know how to carry her through her door and tell her parents, she was almost raped so I saved her, Oh! And she was drunk also that’s why she passed out. Not a good first impression of someone really. I looked at her, looking at how even at night her sun-kissed skin glowed in the night, how her incredibly long legs just made me want to… What the hell. First you go off from saving her from get fined, plus you probably saved her virginity from that douchebag and now you think you’re attracted to her? You fool. She means nothing to you. I focused back on driving and trying not to hit any car while my vision was about to go double. I parked down the basement and opened the door of the back of my car, and looked at her thinking what the hell I should do. I mean I was already at home, and she looks like she won’t wake until the morning. I carried her up, like in those wedding where the groom carries his bride with his arms. Like how superman carries Lois Lane, something like that. Her head was against my chest and her arms, which I placed around my neck. She was incredibly light.. By the time I was in my floor, I didn’t know how to open my door, so I stood there for 10 minutes thinking on how I would open the door to my apartment. “Need some help?” My neighbor Elise said, she probably came back from the party early also. I nodded. “Keys in my back pocket” She got the keys and was ogling for them in my key chain. “Quite a night you had tonight.” “Everyone heard?” “Not really but word will spread, you haven’t done anything like that in years.” She got the key to my apartment holding it, looking at me with eyes so curious. I tilted my head. “What now...” “Is this the chick you saved?” She grinned at me looking at Claudia who was passed out. “Yes.” “Well well well, looks like Alfonso De Luca...” I cut her off before she could say anything. My voice rose up. “She is not my girlfriend, nor am I dating her.” She chuckled. “I didn’t say shit man!!” She was laughing, placing the key in the door and twisted it to open. “Thanks.” I got the keys and went in. I placed her in my room, in the middle of my bed, putting my silk sheets over her and turned on the AC. It was getting late. I looked at her and tucked her hair behind her ear. Leave now. I exited my room after and went to the couch just in my boxers, turned on the fan facing to me. I lied down, looking up in the white ceiling above. My phone rang on the table beside me, and I grabbed it as fast as I could. “Hello?” “Yo Fonz!” It was my friend, who invited me to the party, Nate. He sounded pretty drunk and ready to pass out also. “What?” “I heard about tonight and that was siick! I wish I saw it, you haven’t done shit like that in years man, I wish I saw you kick ass!” he sounded happy, as if I left and came back from the dead. “Yup...” “Anyways man, that girl you saved was.. How do you say it in Italian? Right! Era Bella!!” Beautiful. “I know that.” “Who is she man? You like her?” I sighed, and since he was drunk, maybe, just maybe he won’t remember this in the morning when he wakes up. And since I won’t allow myself to admit I like her. I’ll admit it to Nate. “Yeah, I actually like her..” “Yeah buddy!!” I sighed then put down the phone. How can I like this girl so easily? How can I be able to like someone I just met? How in the world can I like someone who lives somewhat a thousand miles away from me after summer? You’re weak, Alfonso. Weak. I had to find a way to stop, but her smile, her little giggles that might annoy me but I can’t get enough of, I couldn’t. She’s exactly the opposite of my type. She was too happy. The worst part is that she makes me not me. How in the world can someone do that to someone? It was ridiculous. Whatever this is, whatever feeling this was. Whatever made me ache inside when I see her, it had to stop. I hated this. I stood up and went to my room, looking at Claudia from the door, and as my fat cat ran in to sleep on her feet, I chuckled hoping she won’t kick him tonight. Then I got my glasses. And everything was perfectly clearer than without my glasses. I sit on her bedside and looked at her face. Nate was right. She was beautiful. More beautiful than any other girl I’d ever seen, and that girl is right front of me. I stood up closed my room door, and thought to myself.

This has to stop..

Quattro

I grab my phone to check what time it is. Holy shit. Have I really slept that long? It’s 1:30 in the afternoon and I stand up to check if she’s still passed out. I feel like my head is spinning. I go to my room and the bed is fully made up, and fully cleaned. Wait a minute. I suddenly got alert and checked around the room to see if her things are still there. Gone. Where the fuck could she have went this time? This girl is seriously a pain in the arse! I put some clothes on and washed my face, grabbing the keys while heading out of the room. I probably look like a complete mess but who cares. She could be lost in Florence right now. As I head to open the door, a voice startled me and asks, “Where are you going?” “Jesus Christ!!” I accidentally burst out loud, turning around to look at her, “You fucking scared me!” She just stands there and looks all innocent, “What did I do?” I breathe deeply and I could see she was waiting for an answer. Calm down, Alfonso. Stop being so paranoid. She’s just a girl, who you will never see again after summer. You’re just confused. This is nothing. That’s right. Confused. I am confused. That’s all that it is. I put my keys on top of the drawer as I walk towards her. “Nothing, I thought you left and you might be lost around Florence. I was gonna come look for you.” “So you were worried about me?” “Me? Worried? No.. I just didn’t want to be the blame since people knew I was the last one you were with. I don’t wanna be put to jail by your parents you know..” “Mhhm..” She looks at me with that smug smile as if knowing I was lying. “Anyways, are you hungry? I made pasta. I noticed that was all you had in your pantry.” “Yeah, kind of.” I walk to the kitchen, looking down on the floor. Yeah, Alfonso. That’s how you totally not make it obvious that you’re starting to like her. I need to snap out of it. This whole thing is ridiculous. But somehow I can’t.

“This is some really good Alfredo Fettuccine.” I look at her, finishing my last bite. I’ve had about two plates already. Damn, I didn’t even know I was that hungry. “You think so? I mean you’re the Italian one... You are Italian right?” She just sits there, drinking her coffee. Now I know why she’s so skinny. She barely even had half of what I ate. “Yeah, I like it. And yes I am Italian. Well, half.” “Half what?” She puts her hand on her cheek and leans on the table, looking at me. “I’m half English.” I stand up to put the plates on the sink. She gets up to also help me put away the dishes and secretly gives some food to my cat. I doubt she’s aware that I noticed it. “I see. So… are you busy today?” she asks while handing the coffee mugs. Yes I am. I have to be. I have to lessen being around you. “No I’m not. Why? Do you want me to drive you somewhere?” Smooth move, Alfonso. She looks at me with her eyes smiling, but trying to play it cool, “I mean I don’t wanna make you my personal tourist or anything, I just don’t wanna bum around the house alone…” “Is there a specific place you wanna go to?” What the fuck are you doing. Back out now before it’s too late. “Surprise me.” I give her a smug smile, “Well, you should probably grab some clean clothes and sneakers at your place.” I was in my car waiting for her to finish up, and I thought again to myself, what have you done. Don’t regret it when shit starts to happen. You’re in this now. Fuck it. I already am in this situation, might as well go for it. The worst thing that could possibly happen is that summer will be over and she’ll move away. We’ll lose contact and forget about each other. My thoughts get broken off as she enters the car. I catch myself gazing at her again. She was wearing a white knit top over faded high-waist shorts, wearing blue vans and hair tied in a messy pony tail. She grabs her camera from her leather knapsack, it was a Polaroid this time. We reached The Campanile, often called Giotto’s Bell Tower, I could see the happiness in her eyes and how she was excited to go up to the top. I looked at her with a grin, “Are you ready?” She looks at me with excitement, “Come at me, bro!” I paid for the tickets and handed her a bottle of water. I told her to leave her bag in the car and just bring her camera because I’m sure she wouldn’t want to carry such weight with her. The Campanile had 414 steps to get to the top. Oh, and did I notice there was no elevator? As we pass the first level, I could already see hear her exhausted. “Just tell me if you’re tired, we can always rest.” I kinda feel bad for making her climb 414 steps. “Don’t worry. I will. You could’ve at least told me that we were climbing up a thousand steps.” She exhales deeply. “Chill. There are only four more levels to go.” I walk past her with a sarcastic smile, this could actually be interesting. About two more levels after, she sat on the stairs and I pause to look at her. “Tired already?” “I’m not exactly the kind who exercise you know.” She finishes off her last sip of water and throws it in the trash. I sit close to her so that I won’t block the way. I hand her my handkerchief so she could wipe off her sweat and gave her what’s left of my water bottle. “How did you manage to be so skinny if you don’t work out then?” “I have a very small appetite, and I rarely eat red meat.” I let out a big sigh and stood up, “Come on we’ve got less than halfway to go. I’ll carry you on the last level if you really can’t take it anymore.” I offer her my hand to help her get up. I didn’t even notice that neither of us let go afterwards. On the fourth level, she grabs my hand back and stops, “I really can’t walk any further.” I kneel on the floor, offering her a piggy back ride. “Come on let’s go.” “Are you sure?” “Yes.” “I’m heavy you know.” I can tell she’s being shy again. I grab her arms from behind me and wrap them around my neck to carry her. I stood up, making her feel helpless. “I carried you upstairs from the basement to my apartment. You’re not heavy. Plus I need to work out anyway.” When we got to the top level, all she could say was, “Wow.” I was still carrying her on my back. She got her camera and took a picture of the view. The sun was just right, it wasn’t too bright nor was it setting yet. I’ve been here a couple of times but never really appreciated how beautiful Florence was. She called out the guy next to us, asking him to take a picture, “Mi scusi signore! May you please take a photo of us with this beautiful view?” She hands over her camera to him. She wrapped her arms around me and places her head next to mine. I could feel her smile against my cheek, and her hair smelled like watermelon. The guy hands the camera back to her and says, “You make a great couple.” He smiles and walks away before I could say anything. “Can you put me down now? I don’t want you getting tired cause of my heavy weight.” She didn’t even comment about what the guy said about us. I just let it slide and put her down gently, “I told you you’re not heavy.” She smiles at me again, handing me the photos while she takes more. I look at them and couldn’t help but smile while looking at it. And I realize that I look like a complete fool smiling at a picture. I put them safely in my pocket so that they won’t crinkle up. She walks back towards me with a huge grin on her face “You ready?” she asks. “Going down will be fun. Come at me, bro!”

We were headed back to my car, exhausted from running down the stairs. We were sweating so much, luckily I brought extra shirts. I change before entering my car. I could see her from the side eyeing me as I take off my shirt. Even if I haven’t worked out in a while, I still managed to keep my 6- pack. I look at her for awhile, walking over to her side of the car to open the door for her, “Where to, Miss Claudia?” She lets out those cute giggles that I used to find annoying. “Anywhere.”

Cinque

We were driving off into the sunset skies, and usual traffic was in Florence. Silence grew within us; I catch a gaze of her as I was looking left. I sighed, you little bitch, you’ve fell for her, haha, pathetic. Don’t forget about what happened last night, that still doesn’t make everything okay; she’s just like the rest. I took her to the Arno River, it took a while to drive out there but the sun was going down, and I loved the beach at night. I parked my car near the sand and opened the door for her, she came out and took off her shoes, and I smiled taking off mine, she didn’t bring her camera this time. I closed the door, and started walking ahead of her. “Hey you leaving me!” I looked back, with a smug face. “Well you’re bound to follow anyway!” I kept on walking to the water with my hands in my pockets, walking nearer to the water. She followed me running to my sound, she was so thin, and if I gave her a shove I think I’d break a bone. I was looking at the water and then lost myself; I thought I was alone again. Until I heard sudden giggling again then looked at her. “What...” She started smiling big “I’ve been trying to talk to you but you seemed too busy looking out into the ocean.” I chuckled, “I’m sorry.” When we walked far enough, where there weren’t many cars, and not much people left, I sat down near the water. She sat down beside me, looking out the ocean. The moon was making the water glow with her white light, and the water was subtle, yet the air was cold and windy. “What happened to you last night?” She looked at me, like she didn’t have anything to say. I nodded. “No, it’s not that.” My voice heightened, I hated it when people stalled. “Then what?” She shook, and bit her lip. It was definitely sexy. “I didn’t know, one minute I was with my friends and the next everything was a blur...” “What did you drink that night?” “I don’t know, I was just being handed drinks, I thought they were nothing.” I laughed, “You know better than to be handed drinks from strangers.” “Stupid right?” She said, kind of leaning on me. “I had to go save your ass again...” She smiled. “Thanks.” I laughed and said “A habit of mine now, but anyways, tell me about yourself.”

We sat in the beach for hours, talking about her and what she likes and dislikes. For one, she doesn’t like taking medicine, she loves the chocolate kinder bueno? I have never tasted that but I wasn’t about to tell her that... She used to play tennis but quit, referred to herself as a ‘nigger’ from playing under immense heat. She loves taking care of babies, can’t get enough of them and she wants to take filming as a course when she graduates next year. I looked at my watch and said, “Its 11, aren’t your parents wondering where you are?” I looked at her in her dark brown eyes; I couldn’t help myself but to stay on it. “My parents are probably still on their meetings.. Lemme check my phone..” She grabbed her phone from her pocket and I saw it, seeing how many missed calls she had and how many messages she’s received. I kind of frowned for a moment, stood up, wiping the sand off from my shorts, “Come on, rebel.” She stood up, and we were face to face, she smiled again and said, “No rush, I texted them I was coming home soon.” “You’ve been gone for more than 24hrs, they will wonder where you are.” I didn’t notice it, but I moved closer to her face, and I was so near to her small well curved lips. “Eh…” I walked one more step, making our foreheads touch, she was shorter than me so I had to bend my head down a bit, I slowly brought my hand to hold her at her neck, and the moment was perfect, she was holding on to my tee, and I was moving in. Don’t you even dare, you little fucker. Do this and you’re done for, this girl is gonna have you wrapped around her fingers. She was waiting then I backed away, hands in my pockets, looking at the sand, “Let’s go, I’m a bit tired myself…” I felt her surprise, how I backed away like that, how I was so close but I didn’t do it. I was the same old Alfonso. I looked back, and she was just staring at me, looking into my eyes, and I completely got lost in them. She nodded, and let it go, and said, “Yeah, I am too.” Smiling, she was smiling. It was a silent walk back and I was… Well I couldn’t look at her, not right now, not after what I did. When we went into the car, and when we were driving back into the city, I saw her, just looking out the window, looking at how her face puzzled me, how she wasn’t giggling or she wasn’t doing something normal. I felt guilty. You feel guilty? Poor baby you… Well you did the right thing you little ass, you know better than to get involved with another girl, and get left behind all over again. You know why you pulled yourself out of the game, and don’t forget why. I was in a constant battle with myself, telling myself to move forward, then to tell myself to go back. It’s stupid, yeah I know, but when you know what’s good for you, you’d do it. I don’t think she’s the best for me right now… But she makes me happy. Here we go again..

After a few more minutes arguing with myself, I found myself reaching for her hand and holding on to it as a drive, she looked at me and her face lit up, I was relieved. We were in her drive way, and I parked a few feet away from her front door, and looked at her. “Your stop, madam.” Then smiled. She looked at me and smiled back, “Thanks for today, and also for saving me from getting raped.” Then chuckled. “It’s not a problem, I actually like it if it means to see you..” What the fuck was that?!?!? You did not just say that out loud and also admitting to yourself that you, Alfonso De Luca likes this chick from the streets of California! Cunt. She smiled, and held her stomach, as if she was keeping butterflies in and not letting them out. I went out of my car to go to the other side and she just watched me go from my side to hers, I opened the door, and looked at her as she got her stuff and her camera too. We were standing again, face to face. Why was I always getting into this situation?! This is just stupid, really. She was silent again looking up at me, waiting for me to say something. I started to shake, I just couldn’t behave anymore. I wanted something.

I looked at her in her eyes, and bit my lip. I put my hands on her waist and was holding her, pulling her body close to mine. Slowly I was moving towards her face, making her go up against my car. Then she giggled. I smiled, I moved my lips to hers. I was kissing her. Her lips were soft on mine, as she was holding my shirt, I was holding her close to me and I couldn’t get enough, she was like a poison running through my veins, she was someone I wanted so bad, but someone I just couldn’t take. I stopped, pulled away with a long kiss, and I felt her smile, and we were both out of breath, she looked at me as I backed away from her, as I was holding her hand. We were walking to her front door, and I was in peace with myself for a while. As we fronted her door she turned to look at me. “Thanks again for today. Really, I had a good time.” Suddenly the peace inside me went away just like that. You’re done for. “No problem.” I managed to show a smile. “So does this mean, I’ll be seeing you tomorrow?” She smiled, hoping for the answer she wanted. I couldn’t do it. I shook my head. “Sorry.. Plans..” Then nodded. Her smile slowly faded. “Oh.. Well…” She looked down, then back up. “It’s okay.” I nodded. She looked at me. “Well I better get inside.” Smiled, leaning toward me for a kiss. I backed away, and like that she got the message. She just looked at me, and then nodded. “Night..” I watched her as she went inside her house, I felt like I broke her, I made her feel something I didn’t want her to feel. Hell. I felt something I didn’t want to feel. I didn’t want to feel this way about someone anymore. I wanted to just graduate college and live with my cat. She closed the door when I went into my car, I drove off and I felt sorry for what I did, I felt sorry for her and me. I drove back home with an ache in my stomach, and a tighten through my chest.

I absolutely pity myself.

Sei

It’s been two weeks since I last saw her. I feel like a complete ass for purposely avoiding her, but I had no choice. I have to. Good thing the boys are in town tonight to visit me, I only get to see them twice a year ever since I’ve decided to live alone here in Italy. Of course I miss London because my family is there and so are my closest friends, but I had to leave for a reason. And that’s totally a different story.

My phone rings and I check to see who it was. It was James, the closest one to me in the group. We’re practically brothers from another mother. I got my phone and read his text, “Hey man, we just checked in at the hotel. See you in a bit.” I was slightly hopeful that it would be from her. But what the fuck am I thinking. I’m trying to not get myself involved with a girl again. I’ve been fooled once and I don’t want to be fooled the second time around. I freshen up and put on a blue v-neck, black pants, a pair of grey vans and a beanie. Tonight you’re going to stop thinking about her and enjoy time with your friends. I shake my head to clear my thoughts, but her smile pops up again. Yeah right, we’ll see about that. I grab my keys along with my phone, checking that everything is in place before I leave. When I got to my car, I made sure that I turned the music up. Anything to make me not think about her. I dropped by the liquor store first before heading to the hotel which is only around the area. I couldn’t control myself. I had to pass by her house for just a minute. I turned off my headlights right as I approach her house, thank God my car was black. It wouldn’t be so obvious. I looked at her window and there she was, she was playing her guitar and singing along. She seemed sad. I didn’t see a smile on her face this time, not even in her eyes. This is your fault, Alfonso. You shouldn’t have passed by in the first place, now what? You feel guilty. I took a deep breath. Forget it. I’m supposed to enjoy tonight, not feel bad. I drove off and went to the valet parking as soon as I got to the hotel. I gave the keys to one of the guys then went straight up to boys’ floor. I rang their doorbell and Aaron opens it, with the rest of the boys behind. They all shouted at me, “What’s up man!!” I went in and put the drinks down before they attack me and might end up wasting our drinks for tonight. We had our pre-party drinks at the hotel for some catching up before heading to the club. “So how’ve you been bro?” James asks. “Senior year was alright, pretty easy. Summer though.. Not quite sure yet.” “What do you mean not sure?” Tom butts in. I let out a big sigh, “It’s nothing guys. Forget I even mentioned it.” Gabriel sprints to us and sits down. “Woah wait up what do you mean forget it? Nah-uh dude, you mentioned it. Now you are forced to tell.” Zachary just nods and agrees with Gab. Typical stuff, of course they won’t let this one slip away. I grab the bottles of beer, opening them up and passing them to the boys one by one. I sat on the couch in front of them, taking a sip. “It’s just some girl.” “WHAT? A girl? Bro are you sure??” Tom exclaims. “No a boy, it’s about a boy. What the fuck dude yes it’s a girl. I know I told myself I would never get involve with another girl after what Caroline…” I take another sip. James just looks at me, taking a drink from his beer too. “Are you alright with talking about Caroline now? I mean, have you let go?” Yes I have let go. I wouldn’t be having troubles with someone else if I haven’t forgotten about the past. “I’ve moved on with that 2 summers ago. I just don’t want to get used again.” “So tell us about this girl, man. What’s bothering you?” The rest of the boys just listen while James asks. He’s the one who knows me the most. “I don’t know. I think I’ve gone mad. Firstly, she’s American. Well she’s half American and half Brazilian.” “Fuck dude I bet she’s so hot.” Tom adds. The “ladies” man of the group. I gave him a sarcastic look. “Are you gonna let me finish about my problem man? Don’t be all Kanye to me.”I take another big sip from my beer. “Sorry dude, continue… So what’s her name?” “Claudia. Claudia Almeida. I just don’t get it. She’s supposed to be annoying to me. Her laughs and her constant giggling are supposed to piss me off. She’s too happy I don’t fucking get it!” “What don’t you get?” Aaron asks curiously. I’m almost halfway done with my beer, taking one more sip. “I don’t get why it doesn’t annoy me. Why she’s always on my mind, and why it makes me happy when I’m around her. I’ve only known her for three weeks now.” All of them we’re just listening to me, but I knew what they were all thinking about. I, myself was just afraid to admit it too. “Don’t you think you’re in love bro? Like love at first sight thing..” James asks. “I don’t know man. I mean, every time I’m around her it just feels different. Whenever I look in her eyes or see her smile, I always want to just kiss her. Or maybe not always but I just love having her with me. It just doesn’t make sense.” “What doesn’t make sense?” “How it only took days for me to like her, and how I can’t stop thinking about her.” “I think you are in love man. Being in love isn’t about how long you’ve known each other. Sometimes you just know that she’s the one.” “But I can’t. It’s wrong. She’s only here for summer then what? She’ll go back to California and we’ll forget about each other? I don’t want to be someone’s toy. Caroline has done enough of that, thank you very much.” Zach was already on his second bottle and adds, “Is that the only thing you’re afraid of?” Actually, no. I was almost finished with my bottle and looked down at the ground. “What Caroline did to me was traumatic. She was the first girl that I liked and she was one of the popular girls, so I knew I wouldn’t have a chance with her. I was only 15 you guys, I was pretty immature and stupid. I should’ve seen that coming. Finding out that her friends only dared Caroline to go out with me then dump me for some new handbag they promised to buy her if she takes the dare, was just something I couldn’t take at that time. What kind of cruel bitch can do that to someone? That’s just it man. I don’t wanna get involved with another girl again. James looks at me, setting his beer down on the table. “But what if Claudia is different?” I know she is. She makes me feel something I’ve never felt before. I just can’t. “She is different. She’s so simple and bubbly and so innocent. I guess I’m just afraid that I don’t want what we have to last only two months.” “That’s your answer bro! Why don’t you give it a try? You might as well be happy for real after some horrendous skank ruined it. You need to enjoy and live life man. At least make your summer worthwhile.” “You’re right. I haven’t been genuinely happy for a long time. Maybe I will give it a try. Problem is, I haven’t talked to her in two weeks. I purposely avoided her…” “Why…?” “Cause I kissed her that night. And I got scared about it. I thought that maybe if I just stop all of this now then I won’t regret anything.” They all look at me puzzled. “Are you sure that you won’t regret it if you don’t do something about that one person who actually made you happy for once?” Aaron asks. I just shrugged and finished off my second bottle. Zach was probably getting bored so he gets off the couch and grabs the rests of the guys’ beers. “What you need, bro. Is a real drink. Come on let’s head over to the bar.” We all stood up and head over to Astor caffé, which is actually nearer to Claudia’s place. I had to drink this off tonight. I just couldn’t handle all this shit at once.

The boys and I had quite a number of drinks at the bar. It was already 5 am and I was drunk as fuck. We all were. I could hardly remember what was even happening. I was walking out of the bar already, thinking that the boys were following along. I just kept walking and walking. I didn’t even know where I was going to this time. My vision was too hazy and I could hardly walk right. I feel like I’m going to pass out any time. “Alfonso?” I hear a familiar voice but I couldn’t see anything. “Hey Alfonso are you alright?” I sat on the sidewalk, bowing my head on my knees. “Alfonso what happened to you? Are you drunk or something?” The voice asks again. I felt someone helping me up, bringing me inside of a car. “Alfonso, what happened?” “Stop asking questions… are you like a broken record.” “I’ll stop asking if you actually answer,” “I went out with my friends from London to have a drink.” “Well, are you that problematic that you had to be this drunk?” “Me? Problematic? Noooooooo. There’s only one thing I’m having a problem with.” “What is it?” “Some girl. Claudia.” “Uhm.. What about her?” “How can someone be so mean! It’s not fair making someone you’ve just met fall for you in just days.” “How is that mean….?” “Okay well I guess it’s not mean… I just didn’t wanna fall for her because I didn’t want it to just last two months.” I could feel myself drifting to sleep. The next thing I knew, I was back in my bed at my apartment. I could feel someone sitting on the bedside, taking my shirt off and wiping my body with a warm towel. I feel someone touching my cheek gently. Then that voice again, I don’t know why it sounds so familiar. “I thought I was annoying you that’s why you’ve been avoiding me for the past two weeks.. Now I know why.”

I felt a soft light kiss on my lips, and yet again, it too was familiar.

Sette

I woke up, and my head was throbbing, I couldn’t even open my eyes because I feel like I would be blinded by the light. I was in my room, I don’t even remember how I got in here, but thank god, I tried opening my eyes for the peak of the time, 10am. I sat down eyes still closed, slowly opening them. Oh fuck the light is burning me. I rubbed my eyes and was finally able to see. I heard laughing in my living room, and I stood up, just in my boxers, my dark brown hair all messy. “Fonz! Finally you’re awake!!” Aaron said, screaming, and I twitched because his loud voice made my head sting even more. “Come over here baby sit beside me,” Zach says, patting the empty seat beside him, saying it like he was gay. They were all eating in my apartment, how did they even get in here if I didn’t open the door for them? Who even made this breakfast? I stare aimlessly at everything and forced myself to speak. “Who made breakfast…?” My voice was cracking. “Your girlfriend honey.” James said, looking at me grinning. “Bro, what the fuck you talking about..?” I said, and then put my head in my hands, my head was hurting more. “Claudia?” Tom says. I look up probably looking like a confused motherfucker. “She gave us some pills to take away the hang-over, made this beautiful breakfast and let us in while you were sleeping, lovely.” Gab said, looking at me with a kiss face. “I’m gonna throw up..” “Not on the food man!” Aaron said. “Where is she..?” I said, putting my head down back to my hands. “Taking a shower, she said, she’ll be back.” James said. “She is fine.” Tom says. “I told you guys she was hot!!” The door opened, I looked up and saw her, she was in a red long skirt, and a black tank top, her hair ever fell so beautifully and her smile… It was back. “Who’s hot?” She says coming in. I stutter. “Me – Megan Fox.” “Well yeah she is very.” She still smiles and I couldn’t look away. Aaron nudges me and I look at him, he gave me a nod, then I nudged him back. She came to me holding a pill and orange juice. “It’ll make you feel better.” She says. I took it and ate breakfast with everyone, my hangover was gone, I could speak well, and Claudia was in front of me. She was getting along with all my friends and they all seemed to like her. She made the best scrambled eggs and the perfect mix of OJ. I stood up and went to my room to shower after though, leaving everyone behind, I freshened up into white clean v-neck and some surfing trunks. I came out and looked at my phone and I had a message from James. “Have fun my baby boo!” I went out of my room and went to ask James what was his message about and they were all gone. I heard running water in my kitchen, and Claudia was there cleaning dishes. “You don’t need to do that..” She looked back at me and smiled. “Are you sure?” I nodded. “You’re my guest, I’ll do it later, promise.” She was still looking at me, drying her hands. “Your friends are… interesting.” “They seem to like you.” “They do?” Then her face brightened up more. I nodded and smiled. “Doing anything today?” “Not a thing..” “Wanna hang out maybe?” She nodded. “For a month..?” She laughed. “What are you trying to say?” I moved closer to her. “You’re in Europe, one of the best places to be during summer, and you’re stuck in Florence?” “Yeah? What’s so bad about that?” she looked up at me. “I’m trying to say..” I held her face, looking her in the eyes. “Take an adventure with me…” “How..?” She bit her lip. “Let’s take trains, ferries or planes. I don’t care. Let’s go all around Europe..” She smiles, as her face brightens up. “Please? Don’t make me beg…” I was lost in the sea of her beautiful eyes. “I want to… but…” “Parents huh?” She steps back, “Aaand I’m not of legal age yet..” “But I am..” “My mom will obviously need to know…” This was my longest conversation with her, without my head throbbing, I felt normal for once. “I’ll meet them then…” She paused, and then looked at the ground, then back to me, and nodded.

I changed into some denim board shorts, and I was nervous, I fucking hate meeting parents. I hate being asked so many questions. I hated it. Hated it. I was fixing my hair, and then went out, I grabbed Claudia’s hand, and we just walked back to her home, hand in hand, walking through the sunny, clear day of Florence. When we walked in front of her house, something inside me kicked, it was a bright sunny Sunday, and her parents were home. I wanted to puke. She opened the door, led me into the living room, looked at me and said, “Wait here, I’ll call them okay?” I nodded. I was fucking nervous. I heard all three of them coming downstairs and then they all stopped as they saw me. I nodded, walking towards them and let my hand out for her mom. “Good morning Mrs. Almeida, I’m Alfonso De Luca.” She shook my hand. “Morning to you also Alfonso, pleasure to meet you.” She smiled. I nodded, looked at her father and did the same thing. “It’s nice to see my daughter has friends here.” He said. I chuckled. “I actually came here to ask your permission on something.” I sound like I’m gonna ask for her hand in marriage. Jesus Christ. “What is it darling?” Her mother asked. “You see, it’s summer. I and a bunch of friends always tour around Europe, since Claudia has nothing to do, we were wondering if we could bring her along?” I looked at her father. He looked at his wife, as they glared at each other, I looked at Claudia in the side, and she was biting her nails, nervously waiting. “Only if…” I shook, and I looked at Claudia, she looked like as if she was about to scream and shout. “If we always know where she is, texts us, and we need updates on her whereabouts.” She screamed “Ohmigad, Mom, Dad, really?!?!?” She hugged both of them at the same time. Her mom replied. “Darling, you have nothing to do here, and I’d hate to see you left out with your friends, have fun!” She shrieked, “I love you both so much!!” She ran up the stars and said “I’m packing!” Then slammed her door shut. Her father looked at me. “Alfonso, let me just call my friend to get her a slip to let the authorities know you’re permitted to care for my daughter, just in case, okay?” I nodded. “Thank you.” I smiled horribly. I lied, it was only me and her going on that trip, and they actually bought me. God. Her mother stepped closer to me and said “When will you be leaving?” “Tonight.”

It was almost nightfall, we had everything set to leave, my cat and apartment would be left in the hands of my neighbor, Claudia had all the money, papers, and things she needed, and I was just packing. I would meet her in the train station, we didn’t know where we were going, not a clue where we wanted to go yet. The guys were the ones dropping me off to the station and they were all happy for me. “Yeah man! Finally, he’s back!” James shoved me as we were in the station. I laughed. And I couldn’t help myself. “You better visit us in London man!” Aaron screamed. “Fucker you, make sure of that! I’m gonna fucking miss you!” Gab said. “Yeah yeah, relax guys, I’ll visit!” “Hey don’t forget to tap that!!” Tom said. We all fell silent. “What a way to ruin the moment dipshit!” Zach said, tickled Tom and he shrieked like a pussy. We laughed, and greeted everyone good bye, and went into the station.

I waited for her, I was sitting and my luggage was in front of me, just patiently waiting for her to come. I was looking around, anxious to see her, I wanted her now. I stood up, trying to get my phone in my pocket. “Hey stranger!” I looked back and smiled, I hugged Claudia tight, and said. “I was starting to think you wouldn’t come…” “I wouldn’t miss this…” She hugged me back tightly. Then again, we started walking hand in hand, we had 2 luggage’s and they weren’t so big, we were sort of back packing really, no plan, no destination, just going somewhere wherever the wind took us. We went to the ticket counter, and I bought the next ticket out of Florence. It was cheesy, yes, like in those movies, next flight or train out of here, that kind of shit. I honestly didn’t know where we were going, and me and her didn’t wanna look at the ticket so it would be a surprise. We were waiting in the terminal gate of the train, it was right about to come. We were still holding hands, and I was happy. Like floating in heaven a bit.

When we were inside the train, the ticket that the girl gave us was a first class ticket. She said it was the only one available and wouldn’t tell me any further details since I told her we wanted it to be a surprise. There were barely people traveling that night. I held her hand looking for an empty spot and grabbed the seat at the very back. Good thing we were alone. I put my arm around her as she leaned on me. You little cunt.. You know where this might go, you know there are consequences to what you’re doing, you prick, I hope you have a good time, cause I promise you, I will be here to say, I told you so. I looked at her and kissed her head. I looked out the window, we slowly started moving, and we were leaving Florence. “Where do you think we’re going?” She asked with that small smile I hear in her voice, because I knew she was smiling. I looked at her, and kissed her once, softly, long, and making her yearn for more. When I released she bit her lip looking at me. “I have no idea..”