COMEDY FOLLICLY IMPAIRED CHINESE GLORY

BATTLE Tom Butcher asks the big questions in his St. Louis Art Museum brings brand new ex- ‘When politically correct is actually correct’ hibit ‘Power and Glory: Court Arts of China’s Flight of the Con- today. Check out Forum. Ming Dynasty’ to the Lou. See Scene today. chords vs. “SNL” digital shorts: who INSIDE will win?! PAGE 5 BACK PAGE

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Sthe independentTUDENT newspaper of Washington University in St. Louis LIFE since eighteen seventy-eight Vol. 130 No. 62 www.studlife.com Wednesday, February 25, 2009 Mr. Wash. U. Loop Lofts contract to end, not fazed by leaving residents searching “University Terrace has great lo- University cation. It’s convenient for students,” Yao said. “It just makes sense that Terrace offered as we would use property that’s part of tough economy Washington University rather than alternative something owned by an outside en- tity.” Some current Loop Lofts resi- Eliza Adelson and dents, however, are not as pleased Ben Sales with the change. News Staff “I’m a little upset about it,” said junior Regis Murayi, who heard about the apartments’ closure a month ago. Three years after opening, the “I think it’s a good place, and I like Loop Lofts apartments will no longer living there. It’s a very nice building. be available to Washington University It seems like a really well put together students after this academic year. place. The replacement they gave is The University’s contract with not comparable.” FrontDoor, LLC, the company that Others are looking forward to LUCY MOORE | STUDENT LIFE owns the apartments, ends this year. parting with the Loop Lofts, which Starting next year, the Offi ce of Residential Life will no longer offer housing at Instead of renewing the contract, the experienced fl ash fl oods in September the Loop Lofts apartments (above). University decided to open Univer- 2008. Junior Martin Gross, who lives want to deal with.” concerned some students about the sity Terrace, an apartment building in the Loop Lofts, said his experience But Yao said that the one-bedroom safety of living there, Yao said that previously used by Quadrangle hous- there was made worse by the disaster. apartments make University Terrace the University is working to make ALWYN LOH | STUDENT LIFE ing, to students searching for housing “My car was destroyed, there was an appealing choice. University Terrace more secure by Doug Horn performs in Mr. Wash. U.’s 2007 show. This year’s show will be through the Residential Life lottery. a weird ice cream drug truck parked “I think it would be pretty popular adding a fence and cameras around on Thursday, Feb. 26. University Terrace is located at across the street and I had drippy win- for students,” she said. “It’s mostly the area. 6490 Enright Ave., one block north dows which led to sediment mold,” one-bed apartments and that’s a re- Murayi, however, said that the ad- Bailey said. of the Loop. Loop Lofts residents will he said. quest we get in our offi ce. With the vantages that University Terrace pres- Rafa García Febles Mr. Wash. U. raises money for City have the option to “homestead” there Whether or not they are pleased addition of University Terrace, we’ll ents have not convinced him to live Contributing Reporter Faces, a local non-profi t organization for next year, meaning that the Offi ce with the University’s decision to close be able to accommodate them.” there and that ResLife has treated him started by Associate Professor of Ar- of Residential Life (ResLife) guaran- the buildings, some Loop Lofts resi- She added that students would unfairly by closing the Loop Lofts. chitecture Bob Hansman, who works tees them apartments there, should dents do not plan to move to Universi- enjoy University Terrace because it is “I have no idea where I’m going Although budget diffi culties have to bring art lessons and supplies to they so choose. ty Terrace, which offers only one- and next to the Loop. to live,” he said. “I’m trying to fi gure lowered expectations for Mr. Wash. children living in public housing. City Christina Yao, a ResLife housing two-bedroom residences. “When you come out of the back that out, but I don’t care for Univer- U.’s fund-raising, the show’s contes- Faces currently receives no funding offi cer, said that the University pre- “The options for more than a door of the building you see Rag-o- sity Terrace. The location is probably tants are still excited and enthusiastic from the city of St. Louis, the state of ferred to use University Terrace in single are really limited,” junior Julia Rama right behind you,” she said. “If better but at the end of the day, you about the event. Missouri or Washington University. lieu of the Lofts because of its prox- Keighley said. “They’re defi nitely of- I were an undergrad, I would love liv- drive to campus, and the difference is “It’s been fun. It’s been interest- Each contestant is tasked with imity to campus and because the Uni- fering us incentives, but it’s a little bit ing there.” insignifi cant. There’s really no ben- ing,” said freshman contestant Robert gathering at least 50 tax-deductable versity owns the property. of added stress that I don’t necessarily Although crime on the Loop has efi t.” Pino, who, along with 11 of his peers, donations, each $1 or more. Some is in the midst of rehearsing for Thurs- contestants are coming up with unusu- day’s show. “[It’s] a lot more work al ways of meeting their quotas. than I expected it to be, but it’s going Two contestants, junior Grant STRIKE UP A TUNE to pay off.” Barbosa and senior Alwyn Loh, are Pino, who like all contestants has offering to let donors decide whether been raising money for Mr. Wash. U. they will shave their heads, in an event since October, says that fund-raising tagged on Facebook as “Shave a ’fro is “the least pressured aspect” of the or Save a ’fro.” process, but the event has faced ob- Mr. Wash. U. hopefuls compete stacles in its quest to match previous in a variety of tasks to determine who fund-raising goals. will be selected as having the qualities This year, Student Union changed which most epitomize Washington the rules for the funding of char- University. A panel of pre-selected ity events, meaning that the group is judges will make the selection follow- now responsible for more of its own ing Thursday’s multipart show at the expenses. Edison Theatre at 7:30 p.m. Specifi cally, costs like paying for Contestants, who have been fund- the use of Edison Theatre, which is raising and doing other work for the no longer funded by Mr. Wash. U’s group since last semester, say that they SU allocation, could set back its even- are looking forward to the night with a tual fundraising total by more than mix of anticipation and exhaustion. $6,000. “Thursday’s going to be very ca- The rule change caught Mr. Wash. thartic,” Pino said. “It was sort of just U.’s executive committee by surprise. a stressful process—not so much the Initially, Mr. Wash. U.’s execu- fund-raising, but memorizing your tal- tives met the change with opposi- ent, the whole nature of the beast.” tion, but sophomore Tricia Bailey, Pino is excited to show what the the group’s treasurer, said that while participants have prepared. “there’s always resistance to change,” “It speaks to our enthusiasm for the current executive board is taking it it,” Pino said. “We all worked hard in stride. and we all worked together. I think “We expect everything to pretty people will be really impressed—it much remain the same,” she said. shows how much effort the exec. put In some ways, though, things are in, and how much the guys put in.” already changing. While last year saw Pino believes that attendees will a record intake of $30,000, increased enjoy tomorrow’s show. costs coupled with the current reces- “All of this work is going to come sion have resulted in lowered expecta- out. A lot of work went into this show tions. that isn’t really obvious, and I think “Because of the state of the econ- people will be really impressed. Get- EVAN WISKUP | STUDENT LIFE omy and the Edison costs, we’re ex- ting up there and proving that we’ve pecting somewhere in the range of actually learned this stuff—that’s what A live jazz band performs as part of DUC In DUC Out to celebrate Fat Tuesday. Many student groups also celebrated Fat Tuesday by tabling in the Danforth $5,000 to $12,000 [of fund-raising],” it’s about,” Pino said. University Center and selling Mardi Gras-themed baked goods and crafts. Debate over Wydown school continues

Eliza Adelson (CBC) property, now owned by Washington University moved trict’s Web site, “the bond issue, year’s bond issue could hurt the become too much of a residential Staff Reporter Washington University, would be into a residential area, they will which is estimated to raise the chances for Wydown’s bond issue property. an unsafe location for young chil- continue to expand farther,” Red- District’s debt service tax rate by passing. A letter, sent by Superinten- dren. The property is on Clayton dington said. “The fear is that they 29 cents, would result in a tax “Once we get rolling and get dent Don Senti, explained how Community tensions are run- Road across from a shopping cen- will start to purchase residential increase of approximately $275 a formal process in place, we’ll the bond money would be used to ning high in the neighborhood sur- ter and St. Mary’s Health Center. homes behind the site and then ask per year (or $5.29 per week) on a have to have a committee of com- implement the district’s new Fa- rounding Wydown Boulevard. Kristien Reddington, leader of for zoning changes, and that would $500,000 home.” munity members and we’ll have cilities Master Plan and improve a Last Wednesday, the Clayton Citizens for Clayton Schools, a take away from taxpayers and take The initiative requires the sup- to have one that feels strongly for high school and three elementary school board listened to the con- group that is supporting the school away the neighborhood feel from port of 57.1 percent of Clayton the process and those who feel schools. The letter also mentioned cerns of residents in regards to district’s proposition requesting that end of Clayton.” voters to pass. strongly against the process,” said using money from the University its proposal to swap properties $51 million to facilitate changes The School District of Clayton A separate bond issue election Chris Tennill, director of commu- to help pay for construction of a with Washington University, close to the middle school, said that Board of Education voted in fa- next year would be for rehabilitat- nications for the Clayton school new middle school at the CBC Wydown Middle School and build there is also a fear among Clayton vor of placing a $51 million bond ing or replacing Wydown Middle district. site. a new middle school at the former residents that the University will initiative on this year to improve School. Tennill said that the Clayton But Reddington doubts the Uni- Christian Brothers College High purchase residential homes for its Clayton High School, three el- A group calling itself NoSplit- School District is looking to en- versity’s intentions in the deal. School on Clayton Road. expansion. ementary schools and the Family Bond is organizing a fight against gage the community throughout “Is Wash. U.’s offer real? What Residents told the board that “I believe that legitimate con- Center. the coming bond issue. Among this process because of voiced the Christian Brother College’s cerns of the community is that if According to the school dis- the residents’ concerns is that this concerns that the University has See WYDOWN, page 3 ® One Brookings Drive #1039 Newsroom: (314) 935-5995 Editor: [email protected] Please #330 Danforth University Center Advertising: (314) 935-6713 News: [email protected] www.studlife.com St. Louis, MO 63130-4899 Fax: (314) 935-5938 Calendar: [email protected] Recycle 2 STUDENT LIFE | NEWS News Editor / Ben Sales / [email protected] WEDNESDAY | FEBRUARY 25, 2009 weatherforecast Wednesday 25 Thursday 26

Partly Cloudy Rain High 58 High 59 THE FLIPSIDE Low 47 Low 33 Campus EOTO creates eventcalendar SU elections to proceed with few contested races Only one full slate has declared itself for Student Union (SU) elections on March 4 and 5. Called “Montana,” the slate features junior Jeff Nelson—the current AP prep program vice president of administration—for president, sophomore Trevor Mattea—an SU senator—for vice president of administration, sophomore class president Nate Ferguson for vice president of programming, SU Treasury Representative Courtney positive feedback in terms of interest WEDNESDAY 25 Reeves for vice president of public relations and sophomore David Cohen—SU Lauren Olens Treasury’s Budget Committee chair—for vice president of finance. The slate is Staff Reporter in the program, and we’ve had some promoting “big skies and big ideas.” applications turned in already.” Dining Forum Reva Clemens is the only candidate running against the slate, for vice president Michael Dango, a sophomore in- DUC Room 276, 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. A new branch of the Community terested in participating in EOTO AP Bon Appétit will be hosting “The of programming. Clemens serves on both SU and Congress of the South 40. Story Behind the Food.” It will include The ballot will also include votes on whether to give block funding to KWUR, Service Offi ce’s Each One Teach Prep, said he fi nds tutoring as a whole presentations featuring their founder EST and Campus Y, and constitutional changes—including executive restructuring, One program will help St. Louis high to be an excellent program. and CEO, vice president and director of which would create the Equipment Committee and Social Programming Board. school students prepare for their Ad- “Tutoring at all levels is impor- sustainability discussing what sustainable (Michelle Merlin) vanced Placement exams. tant because education is important. dining means to Bon Appétit. Several St. Louis public schools We do not live in a world in which we Assembly Series had approached the University with have equal opportunities, because the DUC Fun Room, 4 p.m. requests for a new program that education which precedes opportuni- Several Washington University students and faculty will gather to lead a conversation National would aid their students’ taking the ty is not equal, and so it is important about race and identity. Advanced Placement (AP) exams, we work together to ensure it is more which are administered at the end of so,” said Dango, who also serves as Satellite crashes down to earth each school year for high school up- CSO’s blood drive coordinator. The Orbiting Carbon Observatory, a satellite meant to monitor carbon dioxide in the earth’s atmosphere, failed to make it into orbit around the earth after being perclassmen. He said he feels that the Univer- news briefs launched early Tuesday morning. While the students will review sity will make an important impact The purpose of the satellite was to help scientists better understand the effect of the course materials in their classes, with the AP tutoring. THURSDAY 26 carbon dioxide on global warming and to create more precise climate models. Each One Teach One (EOTO) mem- “The AP [prep] program is, I think, The satellite, a NASA venture, was launched from Vandenberg Air Force Base bers will also aid the students’ test a really cool and new program,” Dan- Exploring international careers with the in California. The rocket that the satellite was launched on was a four-stage Taurus skills and make sure they are fully go said. “Students in AP classes are Career Center XL rocket. ready on test day. those who have already put a lot of DUC Room 234, 5 p.m. During the launch, each of the four rocket stages successfully deployed. The “This is about how you approach time and effort into their education. A panel discussion will feature professionals ultimate failure was due to the rocket’s nose cone not separating. The weight of the test so you go into the test feeling They are probably smart and driven, who travel abroad for their work or handle international affairs. Students should come with the nose cone stopped the rocket from accelerating to orbit. The satellite ultimately prepared, because I think a lot of the but there are still obstacles that do not questions in mind. Business casual dress is landed near Antarctica. time students go into the test taken allow them to have complete owner- recommended but not required. To fi nd out more NASA is setting up a board to investigate the failure of the $278 million off-guard,” said University sopho- ship over their education.” about guests coming to this event and to RSVP, mission. (Chloe Rosenberg) visit CAREERlink (www.careers.wustl.edu). more Amanda Meyer, student coordi- The program also helps students nator of EOTO AP Prep. gain access to resources they might Roy Zimmerman sings Because AP exams are a large part not be able to afford. Gargoyle, 10 p.m. Obama to recommend budget of a school’s accreditation, EOTO is “Most of us take things like Ka- Hosted by the College Democrats and Pride President Obama will release a budget outline on Thursday with the stated goal Alliance, Roy Zimmerman will perform of reducing the annual deficit by half or more by the end of his term, according to expected to help district high schools plan study books for granted, but humorous songs about ignorance, war and greed. administration officials. Withdrawing troops from Iraq and increasing taxes on the by improving students’ scores. Stu- imagine having to walk into an AP wealthy should provide the necessary cuts. dents will be able to participate in class having never taken a practice Obama inherited a deficit of $1.2 trillion for 2009, a number that was deflated four coaching sessions for AP Eng- test because your family couldn’t by the Bush administration. This number will rise to more than $1.5 trillion due to lish Literature and Composition and afford one,” Dango said. “These stimulus spending. A 10-year projection included in the budget shows the annual AP Calculus BC. students who have put so much into deficit falling to $533 billion in the 2013 fiscal year, or 3 percent of the gross However, Meyer also expects their education deserve to have these domestic product, a level thought to be sustainable by economists. EOTO tutors to serve as mentors and resources available to them.” The budget will present plans for health care and energy policy expenditures role models for the high school stu- As this is a pilot program, EOTO and confirms that the government will use a cap-and-trade system for controlling dents they tutor. will decide whether to continue it de- policebeat greenhouse gas emissions in order to generate revenue. (Becca Krock) “An important part of the program pending on its success and participa- is really the personal relationship tion. TAMPERING–Feb. 20, 2009, 2:32 a.m. [they] will be building,” she said. Other EOTO programs are se- Location: WOHL CENTER The Community Service Offi ce mester-long commitments, including Summary: Mail boxes at the Wohl Center were tampered with. State Dept. warns against spring break in Mexico (CSO) is recruiting tutors for the pro- Jump Start, which involves tutoring Mexico is a popular spring break destination for Washington University gram. Tutors will undergo two train- elementary school students, and Col- students. Lately there has been an escalation in drug-related violence in the towns PROPERTY DAMAGE —Feb. 22, 2009, 12:58 p.m. ing sessions from coaches before tu- lege Bound, which involves helping Location: GREGG RESIDENCE HALL along the Mexican-American border. College officials around the country have been urging students to reconsider toring St. Louis students. high school students with the college Summary: Unknown person(s) broke out a second story stairwell A large part of the program in- process. But the EOTO AP Program window from the inside. The window was located on the south side their spring break plans. volves passing on study skills and is a short-term commitment. of Gregg Residence Hall. No suspects or witnesses. The U.S. State Department has created a Web site that outlines precautions that American students should take while traveling. The State Department has also tips that the coaches have learned “This is a small commitment with LOST OR STOLEN ITEM—Feb. 23, 2009 issued a warning to all Americans entering Mexico. over the years, meaning that coaches big impact,” Durso said. “There’s Location: DANFORTH CAMPUS On the Web site, the State Department outlines the way young people should do not need to have taken AP tests. really an opportunity to do a lot of Summary: IPod left at the Village House while picking up food. conduct themselves. It discusses Mexican law, alcohol and drug laws, weaponry “We’re really looking for folks confi dence building with the high TOC Feb. 15 between 2 and 2:15 p.m. Value $290. use and more. The major tourist destinations in Mexico are also discussed and who are excited about learning,” school students and that’s what this important contacts and phone numbers are provided. It remains to be seen if this said Kate Durso, coordinator of com- is about—to give them the extra new information will affect whether Washington University students visit Mexico. munity service. “We’ve had a lot of boost.” (Chloe Rosenberg)

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www.blueelementsalon.com Open Mon-Fri: 9am-9pm Sat: 9am-7pm, Sun 10am-4pm WEDNESDAY | FEBRUARY 25, 2009 News Editor / Ben Sales / [email protected] STUDENT LIFE | NEWS 3 STUDENT LIFE One Brookings Drive #1039 #330 Danforth University Center Hillel cancels Saint Louis, MO 63130-4899 News: (314) 935-5995 Advertising: (314) 935-6713 Fax: (314) 935-5938 e-mail: [email protected] Birthright www.studlife.com Copyright 2009

Editor in Chief: Sam Guzik Associate Editor: Indu Chandrasekhar Managing Editors: David Song, Brian Stitt, Trisha Wolf summer trip Senior News Editor: Ben Sales Senior Forum Editor: Jill Strominger Senior Sports Editor: Joshua Goldman Senior Scene Editor: Shayna Makaron Senior Cadenza Editor: Cecilia Razak Senior Photo Editor: Evan Wiskup Senior Graphics Editor: Mike Hirshon Online Editor: Scott Bressler Design Chief: Dennis Sweeney News Editors: Puneet Kollipara, Perry Stein, John Scott Assignment Editor: Sopie Adelman Forum Editors: Tess Croner, Bill Hoff- man, Aditya Sarvesh, Dennis Sweeney, Tricia Wittig Cadenza Editors: Steve Hardy, Stephanie Spera Scene Editors: Brooke Genkin, Lana Goldsmith, Paula Lauris Sports Editors: Scott Drattell, Alex Dropkin Photo Editors: Matt Lanter, Matt Mitgang, Lily Schorr Design Editors: Nicole Dankner, Brit- COURTESY OF ALEX KOPPEL tany Meyer, Zoë Scharf, Last year, young Jewish adults celebrate their trip to Israel provided free by Copy Chief: Brian Krigsher the Taglit-Birthright Israel Foundation. This year, a large donation by the Copy Editors: Puneet Kollipara, Elyse Kallen, Hannah Schwartz, Stephanie Dr. Miriam and Sheldon Adelson Family Foundation will provide 10,000 Spera, Christine Wei more free trips this summer. Designers: Mia Feitel, Evan Freedman, Susan Hall, Katrina Jongman-Sereno, number of participants in any given Laura Kornhauser, Courtney LeGates, David Messenger season.” Ashley Nault, Joe Rigodanzo, Eric Staff Reporter Prior to the recent fi nancial contri- Rosenbaum, Katie Sadow, Michael bution, there was widespread uncer- Yang, Kim Yeh tainty as to whether the organization Staff Manager: Willie Mendelson Due to recent funding cuts, the would be able to provide the same Washington University Hillel will not number of trips as in previous years. General Manager: Andrew O’Dell Advertising Manager: Sara Judd be organizing a Taglit-Birthright trip “As of a few weeks ago, we to Israel this summer. weren’t certain we would be able to Copyright 2009 Washington University Student Media, Inc. (WUSMI). Student Life is the fi nan- Chabad on Campus, however, will meet the needs of the Wash. U. com- cially and editorially independent, student-run still be sending its Mayanot Birthright munity,” said Chana Novack, Wash- newspaper serving the Washington University community. First copy of each publication is free; trip this summer. ington University coordinator for all additional copies are 50 cents. Subscriptions According to Marissa Reby, the St. Mayanot Birthright trips. “From what may be purchased for $99.00 by calling (314) 935-6713. Louis campuses and graduate school I understand, Birthright was never go- Student Life is a publication of WUSMI and does coordinator for St. Louis Hillel, any ing to cut trips, just cut back. So this not necessarily represent, in whole or in part, the university that sent a bus of students donation defi nitely impacted the num- views of the Washington University administra- tion, faculty or students. All Student Life articles, in the winter was not eligible to take ber of seats available for upcoming photos and graphics are the property of WUSMI one in the spring or summer session seasons.” and may not be reproduced or published without the express written consent of the General because of a statement issued by the Many who anticipated applying Manager. Pictures and graphics printed in Student international Hillel umbrella organi- for Birthright knew that the number of Life are available for purchase; e-mail editor@ studlife.com for more information. Student Life zation. spots available would be fewer than in reserves the right to edit all submissions for style, grammar, length and accuracy. The intent of sub- The spring session occurs in May previous years. missions will not be altered. Student Life reserves while the summer session is set for “It makes sense that it would be the right not to publish all submissions. later in the year. hard to fund an expensive program If you’d like to place an ad, please contact the “A lot of the funding has been cut if the economy is so bad,” freshman Advertising Department at (314) 935-6713. right now, and as a result a lot of the Sarah Michaels said. If you wish to report an error or request providers have not been given as a As of yesterday, approximately 90 a clarifi cation, e-mail [email protected]. large of allocations as they usually are, Washington University students had which means that we are not allowed enrolled for the Birthright trips offered to take as many students as we usually this summer through Mayanot, one of do,” Reby said. the largest trip providers in the nation. Taglit-Birthright Israel is a founda- A 10 percent increase in demand as tion that encourages national support compared to last year is expected. for a Jewish outreach program that “I have never been to Israel be- provides free 10-day trips to Israel for fore,” Michaels said. “I’ve always WYDOWN young Jews who have not traveled to been very curious about it. This seems Israel as part of an organized group. like a good opportunity to go to Israel from page 1 To date, more than 200,000 people for free, especially since it might not have participated in this experience. be available in the future.” The cutbacks to Taglit-Birthright While in Israel, University stu- are the contingencies for the swap could have been far worse, however, dents spend their time much like they of the property? In my opinion, I had the Dr. Miriam and Sheldon Adel- do while they are in Saint Louis. would like to have all of the facts son Family Foundation not made a “Wash. U. students tend to spend it on the table before being forced large donation to the Taglit-Birthright in the same proportions as they spend to vote on upgrade to the middle Israel foundation. This donation al- their time at Wash. U.,” Novack said. school when I could have the op- lowed the foundation to send 10,000 “They choose to spend their time in portunity to have a state-of-the-art young Jews from around the country deep educational discussion. They building for my students,” Red- to Israel this summer. ask questions about the politics. They dington said. Reby said that even though the choose to spend a good portion of the The University has yet to an- foundation donated more money this trip socializing and having fun.” nounce any concrete plans for the year, due to the economy, most donors Many see Birthright as an oppor- properties. contributed less money. tunity to bridge connections with Jews Jennifer Sisto, a junior and for- After it was revealed that the Ponzi from around the world. mer resident of the South 40, said scheme allegedly run by New York “The global sense of Jewish peo- that she thinks it is important that fi nancier Bernard Madoff affected ple-hood is uniquely expressed by the University and the Clayton many Jewish organizations, there were Birthright; [it] connects Jews and re- community maintain a positive re- concerns that the economic slowdown minds us that we really are one people lationship. would force Birthright to reduce the despite the external differences,” No- “I’ve heard Clayton has been number of trip spots offered. vack said. “You come in touch with strict in the past, but clearly for “Birthright was not hit by Madoff, people who could have been in your the safety of their own students. but was impacted by the economic shoes.” Wydown is very nice, and I feel slowdown,” said Chabad on Campus like we have a large amount of our Rabbi Hershey Novack. “It will never With additional reporting by Perry community in Wydown, and I think go out of business but could shrink the Stein a good working relationship would be good,” Sisto said. 4 STUDENT LIFE | FORUM Forum Editor / Jill Strominger / [email protected] WEDNESDAY | FEBRUARY 25, 2009

FORUM STAFF EDITORIAL Reform technology for the future Blame ashington Univer- function when the log-in uses the fi eld of technology. The University’s Technology Advisory Committee is sity is currently in the same information. portal system should not just be on currently accepting applications, but Charlie Bohlen two of the headiest doctrines in our process of redesigning The University must work toward the cutting edge today, it should only four “at large” students will national repertoire: market funda- Staff Columnist the online portals that a new, improved system that actu- anticipate the technologies of tomor- be selected for the committee along mentalism vs. grassroots popu- Wlink the entire Washington University ally integrates all of the functions row and ensure its relevance into the with one student appointed by each lism. Each creed demands certain community, but while in its early available on WebSTAC and Telesis. future. of Student Union, Congress of the concessions from its adherents: The stages, initial efforts have thus far There is no reason that every student, The Olin Business School cur- South 40, the North Side Associa- People are already missing wisdom of the stimulus bill, the been ineffective. The new WUSTL professor and faculty member should rently uses the Blackboard course tion and Greek Life. Given the size Bush. Or rather, they miss hat- effectiveness of tax cuts, even the Key log-in protocol, which began not be able to access shared course management system to bring together of the student body and how knowl- ing him. By the back nine of his nature of FDR’s political legacy are this semester, hopes to integrate fi les, grades, registration, payroll and class fi les, forums, contacts and edgeable Generation Y is in the presidency, rare was the citizen with not choices they allow one to make WebSTAC, WebFAC, Telesis and, all of their information from the same grades. Nationwide, the system is fi eld of technology, the University something positive to say of the individually. For those seeking the soon, other elements of the Univer- secure portal. While it may make currently utilized by kindergartners, needs to create more opportunities administration. You may have come comfort of blame in these times, sity technology experience to make sense to keep the e-mail system sepa- college students, the government and for students to voice their opinions late to the opprobrium, but I’m sure such specifi c marching orders must navigating between these sites easier. rate for security reasons, all programs many other organizations, and its on the technology that they will use you found some solace in it. It was seem enticing. But, WUSTL Key has done little that require the same username and simplicity could make Blackboard throughout their time at Wash. U. something comforting, something Plenty of people in the media to change the status quo. While the password should not be separated. a viable option for the University to For their part, students must seize you knew the words to. Plenty of seem to be demanding some sort University advertised the new log-in However, it will be insuffi cient consider. the opportunities offered by the people have “Rent” or “Mama of blame-consensus from the high- system as a means of linking all if the eventual system implemented Finally, it is important that University to assure that the chang- Mia,” but for the last three years at est opinion in the land, President three systems, individuals must still at Wash. U. only merges the above student input not be overlooked as es made to WebSTAC and Telesis least, we all had BuSchadenfreude, Obama. There’s the now notorious navigate to separate Web sites and programs without anticipating future the University creates and imple- will enable the programs to better the musical, and it proved a power- v-rant of CNBC’s Rick Santelli: click the log-in button—a redundant changes in the rapidly advancing ments a new system. The Student serve the Wash. U. community. ful social glue, a societal given, “How about this, Mr. President like the superiority of our morals or and new administration. Why the adorableness of Will Smith. By don’t you put up a Web site to have November, we all got the gratifying people vote on the internet as a sensation that we had come to some referendum to see if we really want kind of consensus, at least on the to subsidize the losers’ ‘mortgages’? ex-president’s failures if not on who Or would they like to at least buy should replace him. cars, buy a house that is in foreclo- So I’ll admit it, I miss Bush. Not sure…give it to people who might that I’d give anything to have him in have a chance to actually prosper the White House one more day (the down the road and reward people reverse is certainly true), but with that can carry the water instead of Bush, we knew where we stood, in drink the water?” a united front against an idiot sov- For counterpoint, try any recent ereign. Compared to the crushing Maureen Dowd column: “The presi- ambiguity that seems to pervade dent’s disgust at Wall Street looters every decision facing this country was good. But we need more. now, having a villain to kick around We need disgorgement.” What’s would be nice. For say what you wanting, apparently, is a proper ap- will, perhaps what you must, of preciation for catharsis, or, as Dowd his administration’s disastrous puts it, the willingness to “capture leadership, but he provided us with either the grit the moment requires something it seems we desperately or the fury it provokes.” Which is require: a scapegoat. really nothing more than asking Faced with an economic con- him to indicate which effi gy we traction that is obviously bigger should be burning. Obama, ever the than any one person, class or institu- clever centrist, has so far refused tion, a strange cyclic anti-consensus to comply. For that, he should be has begun to propagate itself in the applauded. void. For people below a certain For it seems obvious to me tax bracket, the demand for the that it matters little that this crisis economically-ineffectual but thrill- cannot be attributed to any one ingly-populist executive salary caps of us. In fact, that it might be all and director’s board shake-ups, that our faults, some symptom of our has whipped congressional Demo- culture of material excess, seems crats into a series of ill-advised rants the only honest thing you can really and post-TARP (Troubled Assets say on the subject of blame. That Relief Program) fi nger pointing, has it led to the deifi cation of men like become of paramount concern. But John Thain of Merrill Lynch, who it peters out the higher you climb. today seem painfully human, is A strange counter-revolt has been true. That it led to the irrational launched by much of the well-mon- expectation that someone without eyed minority that sets the blame at a steady source of income could the feet of over-weened homeown- afford a house must be equally true. ers and over-pensioned American If we must traffi c in blame let it rest autoworkers. These are distressing where it should: with the species. dual narratives for a mob all dressed out in pitchforks with no monster Charlie is a sophomore in Arts & Sci- to chase. ences. He can be reached via e-mail at [email protected]. GODIVA REISENBICHLER | STUDENT LIFE At the core of this divide stand There exists a country X... A change I

Bill Hoffman leaders of X were able to keep the “You’re just a hateful partisan backward (whatever that means). Staff Columnist fact that they committed C a secret. who wants to criminalize policy Perhaps we should treat all could believe in Eventually, however, evidence that differences. We should be looking crimes this way. If your intentions C had been committed began to leak forward instead of dwelling on past are good, then you’re off the hook. here exists a country X. into the public. The leaders of X mistakes,” their critics would say. If a lawyer tells you it’s not illegal, would alter the country in some On many occasions in were able to defl ect criticism from “Our leaders meant well and only then you can’t be held responsible. Nick Wilbar deeper, more ambitious way. Early the past, the leaders of X themselves for a while, claiming ordered that C be committed in or- We shouldn’t get caught up over Staff Columnist on, however, this appeared to be have pushed aggressively that these acts of C were isolated der to protect us!” they would add. who killed whom. It’s in the past. very much in question. Tto have the leaders of many other incidents committed by a few sick It should be fairly obvious Just make sure it doesn’t happen In mid-November, reports countries, including Y and Z, pros- individuals rather than the outcome where I’m going with this by now. again, mmkay? wanted “change we [or, more began to emerge indicating that ecuted in court for C, a particularly of their own adopted policies and Substitute “United States” for “X,” But what, if not the fear of going precisely, I] could believe Obama would appoint Hillary heinous crime. The leaders of coun- orders. and “torture” for “C,” and you have to prison, will prevent government in.” I was ideologically op- Clinton as his secretary of state. tries Y and Z vigorously protested As time went on, however, an exact description of what has leaders from abusing their power posed to the Bush adminis- This was to be a disconcert- their prosecution, arguing in their this excuse became increasingly happened in this country during the in the future? Relying on the honor tration’s I status quo and afraid that ing appointment. While Hillary defense that lawyers whom they had implausible, as even the national last eight years. system of following laws is just a McCain administration would Clinton would be nominally dif- appointed had personally assured legislature of X released a report The Bush administration has as ridiculous when applied to our tug the party line until it blindly ferent, and to a liberal disposition them of the legality of C and that that documented how the leaders of had many suspected—let me repeat political elites as it is when applied provided more of the same. I— perhaps a moderate upgrade from their committing C was necessary X had been responsible for ordering that, suspected—terrorists tortured to the average citizen. and, as it turns out, the majority Condoleezza Rice, she was not for national security. Nevertheless, the acts of C committed by their during its tenure. Torture is illegal Instead of offering these absurd of the American voting public— being swept into appointment on X insisted that neither of these ex- subordinates. under United States law, and the platitudes, those who believe that wanted leadership that would the winds of some far-reaching cuses was adequate and proceeded Unsurprisingly, many people United States, as a signatory to the our president should be free to provide something different, reform in American public policy. to fi nd the leaders of these countries began to put two and two together U.N. Convention against Torture, is break the law and that the U.S. need hopefully something better. Along The style of Hillary Clinton’s guilty of C, with many then impris- and argued that the leaders of X obligated to prosecute those of its not honor the treaties to which it is with almost 69 million other appointment hardly appeared to oned for life or executed. should be prosecuted for commit- leaders who order acts of torture. a signatory should come right out Americans, I voted for Obama. be a move toward the “change we In fact, the leaders of X were ting C. After all, when the leaders From this, it follows quite plainly and say so. This would at least save Change is what we wanted, and need.” Rather, it plainly seemed as so eager to criminalize C and make of other nations had committed C in that members of the Bush admin- our political leaders the trouble of change is what we got. Or so we if Obama was looking for an easy their opposition to it manifest that the past, X led the charge to convict istration should be prosecuted for pretending that their actions are initially believed. way to placate what had become they signed a binding international them. C was illegal according to X’s ordering torture. legal. When then-candidate Obama an intense, and potentially divi- treaty that not only prohibited the own laws. And X was a signatory to For some reason, though, this We can choose to be a nation mentioned change, I optimistically sive, personal rivalry. As far as leaders of X from committing C but an international treaty that required conclusion upsets people. And so that is ruled by laws or a nation assumed he was making reference political strategy is concerned this actually obligated X to prosecute it to prosecute its leaders if they we hear them offering the non- subject to the whims of powerful to something grander than a mere was in no way original and dis- them if they do. commit C. It seemed reasonable sensical arguments I listed above. elites. I know which I prefer. swapping-out of our nation’s ad- couragingly distant from any type In spite of this, the leaders of enough. Bush meant well. His lawyers told ministrators. I thought—or, more of transformation for the better. X eventually found themselves Those who made the preceding him it wasn’t illegal. You’re just Bill is a senior in Arts & Sciences. He can accurately, hoped—that he would As an appointee to the apex unable to resist committing C when argument, however, were bizarrely criminalizing “policy differences.” be reached via e-mail at william.howard. bring about something more fun- it seemed expedient. At fi rst, the subjected to ridicule and abuse. We should look forward instead of [email protected]. damental in nature, something that See WILBAR, page 5

YOUR VOICE: LETTERS AND GUEST COLUMNS OUR VOICE: EDITORIAL BOARD OUR WEB POLICY

Student Life welcomes letters to the editor and op-ed submissions from Editorials are written by the Forum editors and refl ect the consensus of Once an article has been published on www.studlife.com, readers. the editorial board. The editorial board operates independently of the our Web site, it will remain there permanently. We do not newsroom. remove articles from the site, nor do we remove authors’ Letters to the Editor News: (314) 935-5995 names from articles already published on the Web, unless an One Brookings Drive #1039 Fax: (314) 935-5938 agreement was reached prior to July 1, 2005. St. Louis, MO 63130-4899 e-mail: [email protected] Editor in Chief: Sam Guzik Senior Scene Editor: Shayna Makaron Why do we do this? Because Google and other search en- All submissions must include the writer’s name, class, address and phone Associate Editor: Indu Chandrasekhar Senior Cadenza Editor: Cecilia Razak gines cache our Web site on a regular basis. Our thought is number for verifi cation. Student Life reserves the right to edit all letters for Managing Editors: David Song, Brian Senior Forum Editor: Jill Strominger style, length, libel considerations and grammar. Letters should be no longer this: once an article has been published online, it’s too late to than 350 words in length. Readers may also submit longer articles of up to Stitt, Trisha Wolf Forum Editors: Tess Croner, Bill Hoff- take back. It is irrevocably part of the public sphere. As such, 750 words as guest columns. Student Life reserves the right to print any Senior Photo Editor: Evan Wiskup man, Aditya Sarvesh, Dennis Sweeney, removing an article from our site would serve no purpose. submission as a letter or guest column. Senior Sports Editor: Josh Goldman Tricia Wittig WEDNESDAY | FEBRUARY 25, 2009 Forum Editor / Jill Strominger / [email protected] STUDENT LIFE | FORUM 5 When politically correct is actually correct

Tom Butcher or feminine-empowerment or any Staff Columnist other reason, the tradition of only using the pronoun “she” in a specifi c manner, that is to say, with someone who has been previously identifi ed, olitical correctness, in pulls the reader out of the text. general, tends to leave an The real problem is that English unpleasant sensation in our doesn’t have a gender-neutral pro- ears. Our noses wrinkle noun. “He” and “she” imply male slightly, P our shoulders begin to and female genders respectively, and bunch up and tiny, almost impercep- “it” implies the absence of gender tible tremors run down our spines. altogether—and with it, the absence Although some people tend to em- of personhood. This is where politi- brace political correctness (includ- cal correctness has traditionally tried ing new phraseologies) with open to even things out. arms, most of the rest of us will just If only the PC turns of phrase end up sighing away as the chunky, weren’t so ugly! You can only see clunky new language seems to chip “him or her” strung together once unyieldingly against the succinct or twice in a paragraph without words of old. wanting to tear your hair out. At the same time, though, I do Other approximations, like the believe that many of us, even those distinctly post-modernist “s/he,” who most stridently oppose the become awkward through intra- new PC-lingo, can sympathize with word punctuation and the lack of some of its goals. That is to say, the a certain pronunciation. The use problem isn’t so much the ideology, of the singular “they” has become but rather the methodology. And common in recent years, particularly although political correctness is in oral communication (as in the often lambasted for its proclivity for sentence “Anyone can do whatever obscuring the truth—replacing the they want to do”), but the grammati- word “bald” with “follicly-impared” cal implications of such phrasings seems to be the standard joke—PC are usually too much for any sort of language can also be much more ac- formal writing. Though much more curate than the traditional variant. accurate than the standard universal It is in the case of gendered “he,” the clunkiness of these phrases pronouns that this is seen most dooms them to the outskirts of the clearly. By now, it has become English language. fairly clear to nearly every person What we need, then, is an of modest education that the use of entirely new pronoun, a word which the pronoun “he” as a universal or only tells us that we are speaking of indefi nite-gender signifi er causes a person, and nothing else. Gender many problems. At best, it is simply would be left up in the air. I humbly an inaccurate phrase, as the “he” in submit this new word: “ze.” The question may well be a “she,” and benefi ts of this word are many: the there isn’t any way to be certain. sound is a near-blend of “he” and Sentences like “Is he a boy or a “she,” and it can easily be worked girl?” spring immediately to mind. into our everyday language without At worst, the phrasing of the sen- the need to pause and refl ect. At tence reveals a subliminal chauvin- only two letters long, it avoids the ism in our grammar, which assumes cluttered sense of extraneousness anyone of note (and therefore worth which so many politically-correct speaking about) to be male, unless phrases foster. And it can be used identifi ed specifi cally otherwise. multiple times in a row, if neces- But how to fi x this problem? sary; like “he” and “she,” “ze” has The forces of both tradition and a much higher threshold for overuse simplicity are strongly against all than most other words. efforts at reform. Although there’s Perhaps there’s a better solution no real reason why a universal “she” out there, but I haven’t heard of BECKY ZHAO | STUDENT LIFE couldn’t be used in just the same too many. I’ll readily admit that been precipitated by the backlash its aims so strong that we become case, a new pronoun would be both help that unpleasant sensation in my manner, it’s still just as potentially the parts of my mind which ap- against politically-correct language. blinded when political correctness more egalitarian and more ratio- ears to fi nally go away… inaccurate as the universal “he.” preciate tradition fi nd the notion of Certainly much of the PC language offers (or at least approaches) genu- nal—that is, more accurate—and And when authors do attempt to creating a new pronoun somewhat is almost blatantly ridiculous and ine improvements? when it doesn’t present any massive Tom is a junior in Arts & Sciences. He make use of a universal “she,” abhorrent. But part of me wonders only serves to obscure the truth, but We must be careful to evaluate shift in usage, then it seems a pretty can be reached via e-mail at tmbutch- whether out of a sense of equality, to what extent this feeling has is our objection to such misuses of everything on its own terms. In this good idea to me. Maybe this will [email protected].

‘I don’t have prejudices!’ WILBAR from page 4

’ve found that on a campus where the distinction between explicit and your mind processes differences is to of United States diplomacy, Hil- distinctly domestic phenomena. people think themselves very conscious prejudice, and implicit and alert you to the fact that you do indeed lary’s résumé was by no measure America’s situation within the liberal-minded and egalitarian, subconscious prejudice. Few of us will have prejudices and that you need to spectacular. Nor was it par- international political landscape certain people think of themselves assert that someone of, say, a different actively combat them. (In my experi- ticularly lacking. It wasn’t her offered little more reason for as I having reached the apogee of that ethnicity is an inferior human being. ence, you will be quite surprised with credentials, or lack thereof, that confidence. The “war on terror” ideal: a perfection without prejudice. A But while liberal and free-thinking yourself once you start to do this.) A tarnished her as Obama’s choice remained on shaky ground; po- few too many times in the last couple intellectually, it seems to me that many second function is to really facilitate for secretary of state. Instead, it tential sanctions for Russian ag- of years, I have heard people assuming of us are quite “conservative” at heart. that active combat, such that when you was the underlying motives on gression in the Caucuses seemed that they do indeed treat everyone That is, many of us carry implicit recognize that you are going to be less which her appointment seemed to to be on the precipice of fruition; equally; that they are “color-blind;” prejudices of which we are not aware. comfortable around a person because be based. Clinton’s appointment and, most unsettlingly, the United and that it is they who should bring the Though we will not make that overt of some visual or assumed aspect of appeared to have been informed States’ foreign relations were gift of universal acceptance to others. discriminatory assertion, we will react their being, you make an extra effort to by the very political culture from reeling on the basis of Wall I think it is lovely that people are without realizing it more positively defeat that personal gap in understand- which Obama was hoped to be Street’s failings. America needed enthusiastic about this ideal, and it is to a white person serving us our food ing. a departure. And given the utter an international political fix, and always positive to hear people crafting at Bear’s Den than a black person, The problem with the statement lack of contrasting evidence, it it seemed unlikely then—as it positive self-images around the way Dennis Sweeney more cheerily to a person with an “I don’t have prejudice” is that it was by this culture that I assumed does now—that this would come they treat other people. But I want to Forum Editor easily pronounceable American name displays no self-awareness whatso- her tenure would be defi ned. from the further development assert today that while most of us are than someone whose name we have ever; the problem with the statement If Clinton’s recent tour of of an already sound relationship past the point of overtly and conscious- to ask how to pronounce and perhaps “I’m color-blind” is that you are not, Asia is allowed to serve as any with Western Europe. Secretary ly discriminating against people based more directly caused by the mind’s with more interest toward a person and the things your mind does will be indicator, however, my as- of State Clinton looks to both on their name, their ethnicity, their patterns. We like to be able to attribute of Jewish faith rather than someone especially injurious to other people sumption may be widely askew. recognize and comprehend this religion, etc., we’ve far from reached lots of things to someone just by see- of Muslim faith. These are examples, if you are ignorant of them. We have Forgoing a long-standing trend reality. the next point at which we can totally ing them because it allows us to more of course, that may or may not ring a quite a few prejudices, each of us. It among incoming secretaries of Obama’s election was absolve ourselves from accusations of immediately understand the world bell for you personally. But I fi nd that is impossible to totally discard the state, Clinton opted to spend founded on the deeply resonant prejudice. around us. Vis-à-vis your social psych objectionable, as is the idea that we are pattern-making habit of the mind, or her first trip strengthening the promise of change. And though First of all, “prejudices” are a textbook, though, that mental habit going to act differently toward people else the world would be impossible to nation’s ties across the Pacific Secretary Clinton’s appointment function of the way the mind works. contemporaneously and necessarily based on their ethnicity, name or understand. But we can limit them and as opposed to those across the was spoiled by the much-com- Your social psychology book will tell de-individualizes human beings with religion without really being aware of their injurious effect on other people if Atlantic. And regardless of the promised status quo, if her early you that stereotypes are a result of the whom we are not familiar if it is not it; this is profoundly the case once we we only take a critical eye toward our- trip’s particulars, this warrants departure from the diplomatic mind’s desire to categorize and fi nd held in check. start to pay attention to ourselves. selves and admit that, perhaps, we are optimism. norm comes to be the standard, it similarities in order to aid percep- Second of all, even if you are Accordingly, the essential solution not so magnanimous as we imagine. As the full weight of the eco- may end up that change is what tion (and then it will tell you, oddly close to being “without prejudices,” to to all this implicit prejudice—these nomic crisis began to come into we get after all. for a textbook, but correctly, because believe that you are of a totally egali- quite “natural” assumptions about light, the predicament on the eve that’s what I’m telling you, that it is tarian mindset is the fi rst step back and reactions toward other human Dennis is a junior in Arts & Sciences and of Obama’s election called very Nick is a sophomore in Arts & Sciences. our job to fi ght this mental habit). down the very slippery slope up which beings—is an extreme self-awareness. a Forum Editor. He can be reached via clearly for some kind of change. He can be reached via e-mail at nswil- Prejudices—stereotypes lite—are even you just came. Again, I must make A fi rst function of being aware of how e-mail at [email protected]. This need was not, however, a [email protected]. Israel’s search for peace

1948. It also would have included and handed the greenhouses over to negotiations about control of the Golan callously, “There is no solution to the and economic development, stating Eve Samborn & Donna Iken major dismantling of Israeli settle- the Palestinians on a silver platter. Heights in hopes of securing a lasting Palestinian problem except by Jihad.” that, “We intend to interlace them with Op-Ed Submission ments in Gaza and the West Bank, with These greenhouses were a centerpiece Israeli-Syrian peace treaty. These Even after accepting ceasefi res, economic development, rapid eco- territorial exchanges to compensate in the infrastructure and rebuilding of negotiations are proof that Israel is still Hamas continues to perpetrate vio- nomic development for the Palestinians for the small amount of land outside of the Palestinian economy in Gaza, but willing to make sacrifi ces for peace as lence. As a Hamas spokesman, Abu and regional cooperation.” espite 61 years of constant Israel’s pre-1967 borders that would be instead of using them, they were looted long as it has a willing partner. Israel is Youssef Said, recommitted his organi- Israel has given up so much in the threats and warfare, retained for security purposes. and destroyed as Palestinian police even willing to work with Fatah, which zation to the destruction of Israel and name of peace and has shown time and Israel continues to make It was by far the most generous watched, and in some cases, assisted in is a potential partner for peace. to rearmament, he said, “A unilateral again that it is ready for peace. How- an enduring commitment proposal the Israelis had to offer. the literal breakdown of the economy. Hamas, however, will never sign a ceasefi re is nothing to do with us...and ever, a lasting peace is not unilateral. to D peace. Yasser Arafat turned it down, prefer- Rather than use the opportunity of lasting peace treaty with Israel. we will continue to bear arms.” Unfor- Instead, real peace is achieved only In 2001, then-Israeli Prime Minister ring to launch the second intifada rather Israeli disengagement to develop the The Hamas Charter states plainly tunately, these are not simply infl am- when both sides make compromises. Ehud Barak offered the Palestinian than accept anything less than the total infrastructure of statehood, however, that the organization will accept noth- matory and offensive words; they are Israel is ready, but it cannot negotiate Authority full sovereignty over all of destruction of the Jewish state. Palestinians, led primarily by Hamas, ing less than the full destruction of reality and were proven by the constant with an entity that refuses to recognize the Gaza Strip, 95 percent of the West In 2005, Israel withdrew from turned the area into a launching pad the state of Israel. Article 13 states, barrage of rockets that continued even its very existence. Bank and even all of East Jerusalem, the Gaza Strip, forcing thousands of for unending rocket attacks directed “[Peace] initiatives, the so-called after Hamas paid lip service to the idea With every rocket attack, Hamas including control of the Temple Mount, Israeli citizens to leave their homes at Israeli civilians. Within Israel, the peaceful solutions, and the inter- of accepting a ceasefi re. Even now, pushes the prospect of peace further which has huge religious signifi cance in the hopes of peace. Not only was once-promising policy of unilateral national conferences to resolve the rocket attacks continue. away. for Jewish Israelis. The plan included the land left for the Palestinians, but disengagement was soon judged as a Palestinian problem, are all contrary Even in the face of constant attack, a generous compromise on the issue American Jewish organizations as well foolish mistake that created an unac- to the beliefs of the Islamic Resistance Israel has not completely given up Donna and Eve are sophomores in of Palestinian refugees, offering $30 as independent members of the World ceptable security risk for Israel. Movement. For renouncing any part of hope. The prime minister designate Arts & Sciences and can be reached billion dollars in compensation for Bank bought the incredibly profi table Most recently, Israel has met with Palestine means renouncing part of the Benjamin Netanyahu has vowed to via e-mail at [email protected] and Palestinians who had fl ed Israel in greenhouses from the Israeli citizens Syrian offi cials to conduct serious religion...” The article goes on to claim work for peace by focusing on security [email protected], respectively. 6 STUDENTCADEN LIFE | CADENZA Cadenza Editor / Cecilia Razak / [email protected] Z WEDNESDAYA | FEBRUARY 25, 2009 FLIGHT OF THE vs. SNL DIGITAL CONCHORDS SHORTS

Percy Olsen don’t know where to start. It’s concept and stick with it. There Stephanie Spera costumes (made mostly from tinfoil), of the Conchords.” But if you have TV Editor probably easiest to begin with was one song about how rappers Movie Editor props (stuffed animal cats) and crazy- just three minutes you can enjoy the basics. Flight of the Con- can have their feelings hurt, like bad special effects, Michaels often Samberg, Schaffer and T.Pain’s chords has such a wide variety anybody else, and there was no dismisses it, and we the audience get legitimately good rap song, “I’m On of songs. I realize this is almost way that song could have turned Don’t get me wrong, Perc, I enjoy to see why. A Boat.” Proving that it doesn’t mat- When you explain Flight of an intangible aspect of the duo, out poorly because its conception “Flight of the Conchords” as much Who can forget “Dick in a Box?” ter what you are singing about– as the Conchords, you have to start but the variety, which only grows was so strong. Two guys rapping as the next pretentious television Not only does it include the musical long as you have a banging beat, a with how they describe them- with each new episode, is most on their way to “Narnia” this is critic; I know all of the words to genius that is Justin Timberlake, but music video that involves a yacht and selves: “formerly New Zealand’s impressive. not. “Bret You’ve Got It Goin’ On” and it also provides guys with an idea T.Pain—swim trunks, fl ippy fl op- fourth most popular guitar-based I’ve been to your side, Spera. Last, I just want to say that even fi nd the way Bret and Jermaine for a thoughtful, inexpensive gift pys and nautical-themed pashmina digi-bongo a cappella-rap-funk- I’ve drunk your punch, and I’ve I don’t hate The Lonely Island. say the word ‘kabob’ endearing. But for every occasion. And how many afghans can be just as baller as Apple comedy folk duo,” and anything seen enough to know that Andy I think they’re great. Back in Andy Samberg and Co. provide their Creative Arts Emmys for Outstand- Bottom jeans. further just writes itself. There’s Samberg can rap but he can’t my junior year of high school, audience with more than just weird ing Original Music and Lyrics has And unlike “Flight of the Con- Jermaine Clement, the bassist croon. The Conchords can really I would spend entire afternoons folk songs about the “Lord of the Flight of the Conchords won? Oh chords,” I don’t need cable to check who, appropriately, has the drier sing, man, in tune, and with vigor watching “Just 2 Guyz.” But Rings” and not gettin’ any. yeah, zero. out Samberg’s goofy smile and lus- sense of humor, and there’s Bret if the time is right. Oh, and my now that I’ve experienced the The perfect balance of genius and You have to invest time in “Flight cious locks. McKenzie, the skinnier and more guys can rap, too. Hiphopopota- Flight of the Conchords, there’s stupidity, “SNL’s” digital shorts have peculiar of the two. They spend mus and Rhymenoceros, one. The no turning back. They’re more something for everyone. their time singing songs about Lonely Island, zero. consistently good than The If you’re in the mood for an the year 2000’s Robotic Upris- As for the most important Lonely Island (I’m still trying emotional love ballad dedicated to ing and David Bowie’s pointy- issue, I think that the Conchords’ to forget that fiasco that was Mahmoud Ahmadinejad featuring the nipple antennae. Oh, and I almost songs are truly funnier than those “The Space Olympics”), and in vocal stylings of Adam Levine, check forgot: on “SNL.” Again, I think it’s a the end, Lonely Island’s songs out “Iran So Far.” Need to squeeze Flight of the Conchords is matter of range. A lot of “SNL” don’t dependably keep the good in a quick, low-impact workout? better than The Lonely Island. digital shorts salvage their times rolling. Plus, I’ve always Exercise along with Desiree (Drew I mean, like, leagues better. crummy starting points with bits preferred Bret’s cut of curly hair Barrymore) in “Body Fuzion.” How Seriously, there’s such a wealth of random humor, but Clement to Samberg’s obnoxious locks. about a spoof with such hilariously of evidence in my favor I almost and McKenzie start with a funny It’s a length issue. accurate facial expressions it makes you actually want to sit through an episode of “The O.C.”? Hit up “Dear Sister.” And let’s talk output: Andy Samberg and fellow Lonely Island members Akiva Schaffer and Jorma Taccone usually produce the entire short in fewer than fi ve days. Flight of the Conchords took two years to create their second season. So forgive my guys for one bad sketch every now and then because for every “Space Olympics,” there is a sketch in which Natalie Portman raps about receiving cunnilingus while driving recklessly on an expressway. The Lonely Island can also be self-deprecating. The Laser Cats se- ries, i.e. “Laser Cats!”, “Laser Cats! 2”, “Laser Cats! 3D” and “Laser Cats 4-Ever!” (executive produced by Steve Martin), proves that they know just how ridiculous some of their sketches are. All Andy Samberg and fellow “SNL” cast member Bill Hader want is for Lorne Michaels to allow them to show “Laser Cats” on “SNL”, yet because of the sets (random offi ces in “30 Rock”), MCT CAMPUS MCT CAMPUS Andy Samberg

TELEVISION REVIEW In Defense of...... the silent protagonist (because he can’t defend himself) Dollhouse Brian Stitt Craig Ostrin the only one who has read this Managing Editor Video Game Editor article in this way. Such is the beauty of the silent protagonist in video Oh, hello there. How are you? games. You are Gordon Free- Joss Whedon promised his fans he You’re well? Good to hear it. How’s man in “Half-Life,” the best- would never return to the network that class?...Yes, I’m enjoying the semester selling fi rst-person shooter brutally maimed and then pulled the too. Would you like to continue read- series. There’s no pesky plug on “Firefl y.” But never say never ing? “personality” to get in the way again, Joss, because he’s back on Fox > Yes. of you imprinting yourself on with a brand new show, “Dollhouse.” > No. the character you’re playing. Maybe he came back because of the I’m glad you’re still with me! Now, They are completely empty foxy lead character (I’m not even I know what you’re thinking, but that shells for you to fi ll with your sorry about that pun) played by Whe- wasn’t condescension. It was reader imagination. don alum Eliza Dushku. agency! Don’t you feel immersed? Sure, you can’t actually She is Echo; Echo is an active. Ac- Like you’re actually navigating and in- continue to play “The Legend tives are human blank slates, beautiful FOX | MCT teracting with this article in your own of Zelda: Ocarina of Time” bodies with no personality or memory. on missions to make sure she’s safe unique way? I assure you, you most if you don’t agree when the They can take on any humanly-at- and that customers don’t try to get certainly are The Reader, and you are princess asks, “Yes or no, tainable skill or attribute through more than what has been contractually would you like to help me computer-to-brain downloads. They agreed. As Echo inevitably becomes spy on the big evil-looking live at the Dollhouse, a super-exclu- more self-aware (she has to, in order guy in the throne room over sive provider of diffi cult-to-acquire for the show to work), their father/ there who may or may not be personalities. Need a spy to break into daughter back-and-forth should take trying to take over the world?” a rival corporation and leave no trace? over as the main character dynamic on But these not-really-a-choice Want a totally compatible date for the program. choices keep you absorbed in your birthday weekend? You just need The format at least does lend itself the game. They’re great ways to have a lot of money in the bank to an interesting variety: Each week for developers to make you to cover the check you’ll be writing; Echo will presumably have a new feel like you have some power actives don’t come cheap. mission and persona, à la “Quantum over the story without going If all this seems geeky and Leap” (the gold standard of episodic through all of the hard work of confusing, well, it is. But the premiere light sci-fi ). actually giving you that power. episode shows off Whedon’s unparal- In the fi rst episode, Echo is given What’s that you say? You leled skills at defi ning complicated the experience of several hostage want to play as a real character mythology quickly and naturally. negotiators to facilitate a ransom and not just a creepy, silent Unfortunately, the compelling, well- payment. Many of the peculiarities of observer? You want the hero drawn character well seems to have the imprinting process are explained of the story to have, well, a run dry because “Dollhouse” doesn’t when one of Echo’s persona models hero’s personality? You want feature any. recognizes one of the kidnappers, me to stop pretending you’re Echo is understandably fl at as she which triggers her asthma. So she gets talking to me? But that would has no personality, and Olivia Wil- strengths and weaknesses. That could break the immersion! Never liams (“Rushmore”) is perfect as the be interesting in the future, but it felt mind that it might make a cold, all-business ranking offi cial at gimmicky and overly coincidental whole lot of sense within the the Dollhouse. She is willing to send this time. world of “Half-Life 2” for Echo anywhere as long is the price The second episode was not much Gordon to warn his partner, is right and she is only interested in higher in quality than the fi rst, but at Alyx, when a tripodal machine Echo’s safety as a cost issue. Franz least it showed that Whedon is willing of death and destruction Kranz as the software designer and to get ridiculous with his plots. Echo creeps up behind her, he’d be resident geek is mostly obnoxious, heads to the woods to be a million- shouting with someone else’s which is unfortunate since he seems to aire’s wilderness guide/sexual toy for voice instead of yours and that be the sole provider of comic relief. the weekend, only to have the tables would just kill the experience The character relationships turned on her when he turns it into (so kill Alyx instead!). haven’t had much time to grow, but a strangely sexual version of “The Besides, haven’t you it’s not looking good so far. The only Most Dangerous Game.” Is it possibly always wanted to play as a one I can see going anywhere is that sexist and offensive? Ludicrous and mute, homicidal maniac? between Echo and her handler, Boyd, indicative of low-quality television? played by Harry J. Lennix. He’s the Yes. Will I be watching next week? guy who follows her from a distance Absolutely. WEDNESDAY | FEBRUARY 25, 2009 Sports Editor / Josh Goldman / [email protected] STUDENT LIFE | SPORTS 7

MLB PREVIEWSPORTS TRACK & FIELD America’s pastime resumes School record falls

Josh Goldman is the Yankees’ to lose. Ibañez filling the hole Burrell made in left field when he signed with Senior Sports Edtor at Wartburg Invite AL Central: the Rays, the Phillies are still the Division Winner: Detroit Tigers team to beat in the NL. With a solid (barely) pitching staff and a small stadium Josh Goldman With the Grapefruit League and The AL Central houses a few that lets All-Stars Ryan Howard, Senior Sports Edtor Cactus League beginning exhibi- teams with star power that did not Chase Utley and Jimmy Rollins tion play today, it is time to pre- live up to their potentials. After show their power, the Phillies will The Washington University track view the pennant races of Amer- winning the 2006 pennant, the Ti- yet again vanquish the Mets. and fi eld team saw one school record ica’s pastime. Let me start off by gers have bordered on mediocrity For their part, New York has broken and three runners post NCAA noting that I am a die-hard Yankee despite adding superstars Miguel improved for the 2009 season. National Indoor Championships provi- fan who believes that the Yankees Cabrera and Dontrelle Willis to New closer Francisco Rodriguez sional qualifying times on Saturday at are the best team in baseball. That their team last season. After the and setup man J.J. Putz have the Wartburg Invitational. being said, this article attempts to team’s abysmal start to the 2008 strengthened the previously frail Freshman Elizabeth Phillips shat- analyze all 30 teams as objectively season in which the entire pitch- bullpen, but Johan Santana can- tered the school record and submitted as possible. ing staff was either ineffective not start every game for the team. a provisionally-qualifying time in the or injured, look for the Tigers to Look for the Mets to finish second mile run with a time of 4:57.86, break- AL East: rebound in 2009. Ace Justin Ver- in the division and just take the NL ing the old time by 2.92 seconds. She Division Winner: New York lander should rebound from a poor Wild Card. also placed fi rst in the event by 0.09 Yankees or Boston Red Sox 2008, as should Willis, and the While much improved, the seconds. AL Wild Card: Boston Red Sox team’s addition of fire-baller Ed- Atlanta Braves are still closer in Senior Danielle Wadlington, who or New York Yankees win Jackson from the Rays will ability to the perennial disappoint- has already provisionally qualifi ed for Once again, the American help the rotation stay competitive. ments that are the Florida Marlins NCAAs in both the triple jump and League East will likely see four of Look for the rotation to pitch just and Washington Nationals, but in the 55-meter hurdles, improved on her five teams finish the season with well enough for a powerful offense keeping with past trends, the Mar- triple jump with a fi rst place fi nish and a winning record and three teams to take the division. lins will win the World Series in personal best mark of 11.54 meters. battle for two playoff spots. The The Minnesota Twins, com- 2010. She also submitted a qualifying time of 2008 AL East Division Champion ing off another division title, have 8.51 seconds in the 55-meter hurdles in and AL Pennant-winning Tampa many questions regarding their NL Central: a second place fi nish. Bay Rays begin the season with pitching staff, which has guided Division Winner: Chicago “It was a very good precursor to virtually the same team as last sea- the offensively feeble team to Cubs conference because not just us but the son, and with the addition of out- its recent success. Ace Francisco The Cincinnati Reds have a po- [other] teams there posted provisional fielder Pat Burrell from the Phila- Liriano battled through an injury- tentially great, young pitching staff times as well. I think that because ev- delphia Phillies, the Rays will once filled season, and with the Twins’ and the Cardinals are relatively eryone competed really, really well last DAVID HARTSTEIN | STUDENT LIFE ARCHIVES again be competitive. Pitching and best starter winning just 12 games solid all around, but the Chicago weekend, we will compete really, really defense brought the Rays to the last season, look for a decent team Cubs are still by far the best team well next weekend,” Wadlington said. Senior Caitlin Molloy competes in the hurdles in a March 2008 meet. World Series last year, but their to fall just short of the postseason. in the division. While the Cubs The heptathletes and pole vaulters before heading to New York for the ally supportive and people have really offense could not contend with Catcher Joe Mauer, first baseman lost the versatile Mark DeRosa and competed at Illinois College, where UAA Indoor Championships, hosted fallen into the program,” Coghill said. the powerful Phillies, and with the Justin Morneau and third baseman closer Kerry Wood to the Cleve- nine of 10 athletes added personal or by New York University on March 6 With the UAA featuring some of Yankees and Red Sox stockpiling Joe Crede do not have enough fire- land Indians, no other team in the season bests. Freshman Katie Hered and 7. The women have won the In- the best sprinters in D-III, the team will pitching, fielding and hitting tal- power to lead the Twins to victory. division can match the team’s four also improved her provisional pole door title eight of the past nine years. be looking to use the conference meet ent, look for the Rays to miss the The Chicago White Sox are elite starters: Carlos Zambrano, vault height. “It would be great to win one out to gain experience. postseason this year despite having very talented on paper, but the Ted Lilly, Ryan Dempster and Rich For the men, senior Pierre Hoppe- of 10 years. I think that our conference “For Nationals caliber people, it an excellent pitching staff that can older team will not have enough Harden. Outfielder Alfonso Soria- not won the 55-meter dash, sophomore has gotten a lot stronger, and it will be creates kind of a stepping stone...other shut down any opponent. offense, defense or pitching to no, first baseman Derrek Lee and Chris Brennan placed second in the tougher to win. We just have to put our than that, it has become a great place to The division will once again be make the playoffs. Slow on the catcher Geovany Soto will provide 400-meter run, freshman Dan Davis best performances forward,” Wadling- set personal records…and it’s become a battle between the Boston Red bases and prone to strikeouts, the enough offense to subdue Albert won the 55-meter hurdles and senior ton added. a great stepping stone for outdoors, Sox and New York Yankees, with ChiSox offense will not be able to Pujols and the rival Cardinals, but Tanner Coghill won the triple jump. “I’m actually impressed at how which is our main focus,” Coghill the losing team still making the help a decent pitching staff make the Cubs will still find a way to Senior Nick Silverman, junior Alden prepared they are. We came under added. playoffs as the AL Wild Card. The the postseason. choke in the playoffs and lose in Black, sophomore Zach Bahor and a new coach, kind of a new training The indoor season will then end Sox are led by reigning AL MVP the first round to either the Phillies freshman Tucker Hartley also fi nished philosophy altogether, and you were at the NCAA Indoor Championships Dustin Pedroia and Silver Slugger AL West: or Mets. second through fi fth in the 3,000-meter worried about a gap between when that the following weekend, which will be Kevin Youkilis, but the team has Division Winner: Los Angeles run. could actually translate into good per- hosted by the Rose-Hulman Institute of also bolstered its starting pitching Angels of Anaheim NL West: The team will have a weekend off formances, but the coach has been re- Technology. by adding veterans Brad Penny and Despite losing Teixeira to the Division Winner: Los Angeles John Smoltz to a rotation that al- Yankees and longtime outfielder Dodgers or Arizona Diamond- ready includes aces Josh Beckett, Garret Anderson to the Atlanta backs e Gallery on Washington While it will not matter who Daisuke Matsuzaka, John Lester Braves, the Halos will have no 4140 Washington Ave. and the crafty knuckleballer Tim problem winning the West yet wins the NL West, since the en- Efficiency through Large 1 bedrooms. From $550-$850 per month. Wakefield. Seven of nine position again. Free agent outfielder Bobby tire division is terrible, I am fairly Free Prize for playing Sodoku and Crossword Puzzle valued at $50!! players for the Sox (including DH Abreu, who hit .296 with 100 RBI certain that either the Dodgers or Send code # 8516 to [email protected] David Ortiz) have made All-Star for the Yankees last season, will D-Backs will prevail. Arizona has CALL us at 314.534.1323 www.stlapartmentsforyou.com appearances, so the 2008 AL Wild more than fill in for Anderson, and the best starting pitching and over- Card winner is bound to make an- despite having to play the unprov- all offense in the division, but the other playoff run. en Kendry Morales at first base, young team will likely meet its Barring any injuries, however, the Angels’ pitching and offense kryptonite in the form of Manny 2009 should be the Yankees’ year are above and beyond the best in Ramirez. It is only a matter of time to retake the division. After miss- the West. before the best hitter in the game ing the playoffs for the first time While the Oakland Athletics re-signs with the Dodgers, and un- in 15 seasons, the Yankees’ front have added free agents Matt Hol- der his and Manager Joe Torre’s office flexed its muscle in the free liday and Jason Giambi to the mix, leadership, the Dodgers will find agent market by spending $440 they do not have enough offense a way to win the division even af- million on the three top players on or pitching to contend for the divi- ter losing their top starting pitch- the market. With a pitching rotation sion. Neither do the Mariners, who ers, Derek Lowe and Brad Penny. that now includes All-Stars CC Sa- have signed Ken Griffey, Jr. to be Look for the Dodgers to lose in bathia, A.J. Burnett, Chien-Ming their designated hitter and have the NLDS to either the Mets or the Wang and Andy Pettitte as well two aces in Felix Hernandez and Phillies. as the sensational youngster Joba Erik Bedard. The Texas Rangers For all fans of the Padres, Rock- Chamberlain, the Bronx Bombers have the offense to contend with ies and Giants, better luck next have shown their division rivals the Angels, but their terrible pitch- season, although the Giants will that they can pitch with the rest of ing will land them second or third make the biggest news in the NL the league. By adding Gold Glove- in the division. West when Randy Johnson wins winning slugger Mark Teixeira his 300th game. and getting rid of Jason Giambi NL East: and Carl Pavano, the Yankees now Division Winner: Philadelphia Playoffs: have an All-Star at seven of nine Phillies ALDS : Yankees over Tigers, positions. Outfielders Xavier Nady, NL Wild Card: New York Mets Red Sox over Angels (again) who hit .305 with 25 home runs last The Mets spent more money NLDS : Phillies over Dodgers, season, and rookie Brett Gardner, than any other team aside from Mets over Cubs who can steal bases at will, will their crosstown rivals during the ALCS : Too close to call help the All-Star-studded Yankees offseason, but the Phillies are NLCS : Phillies over Mets reach even higher levels. Barring still the better team and will win World Series: Yankees/Red Sox any injuries, the 2009 World Series the division. With slugger Raul over Phillies

Sudoku By The Mepham Group

Level: 1 2 3 4 Complete the grid so each row, column and 3-by-3 box (in bold borders) contains every digit 1 to 9. For strategies on how to solve Sudoku, visit www.sudoku.org.uk. Solution to Monday’s puzzle

© 2009 The Mepham Group. Distributed by Tribune Media Services. All rights reserved. 2/25/09 8 STUDENT LIFE | SCENE SCENEScene Editor / Shayna Makaron / [email protected] WEDNESDAY | FEBRUARY 25, 2009 Sing it loud and sing it proud Visiting the karaoke bars in St. Louis

Meredith Plumley minimal cost. Open at 7 p.m., Scene Reporter the music starts at 9 p.m. but doesn’t really get going until later in the night. While it can be Sure, everyone loves to sing a little hard to spot, don’t let the in the shower, especially when neighborhood deter you. There you think no one is listening. You are large signs next to the door turn up the music from your iPod and plenty of parking within close speakers (safely positioned on the distance. While it is 21 and over, dry bathroom counter) and croon UR MOM’s can be rented out for away, even if your roommates events to give the under 21 crowd aren’t so thrilled. a chance to rock out, too. SNOW POWERS | STUDENT LIFE For those of us who might Maybe you just want the typi- want a slightly larger audience cal karaoke experience in a neigh- but don’t have the pipes to join borhood bar, with the chance to an a cappella group, it can be sing and perhaps embarrass your- difficult to find the right singing self on stage. In this case, head opportunity. While singing at frats over to Tom’s Bar and Grill in the Get tested can be fun, they don’t always play Central West End. With no cover the best sing-a-long tunes. Other and free songs, it’s hard to get a times, a self-proclaimed DJ will better deal to sing your heart out. Protecting yourself and your hook-ups get music-ADD and move to the The crowd can range from college next song before you can even kids to 80-year-olds, so you never realize it—and then you’re stuck know who you are going to run singing the chorus alone and out into. Open from 9 p.m. to 1 a.m., loud for everyone to hear. the bar is limited to those over 21. Brooke Genkin health regimen, much like taking If you are looking for a chance “The atmosphere is very Scene Online Editor vitamins or getting exercise. The risks to sing loud and proud and not friendly, like a local pub. [For of unattended infections are horrify- worry about standing out, then karaoke,] it’s an eclectic group,” ing, yet so few people are willing to head over to The Loading Zone general manager Stephen Fisher get tests done. Maybe it is the fear of on Tuesday nights. This gay bar in said. With karaoke available Safety First fi nding out something you don’t want

the Central West End has a theme PHOTO COURTESY OF MEREDITH PLUMLEY Friday and Saturday, a night at In a recent issue of Cosmopolitan to know. Maybe it is the cost of the for every night of the week, Tom’s can be the perfect weekend magazine, Cosmo editors asked Dr. testing. Maybe it is the test itself. But and Tuesday nights they feature Sophomores Tyler Bertroche, Su-Yeon Koo and Kelly Kilgallon sing karaoke evening out. Ian Kerner for his 10 “fi rst-time” no matter what the reason, it really is “Show Tunes.” People are encour- at UR MOM’s Bar, a 21-and-over bar in Soulard that can also be rented out With several different venues sex commandments. The very fi rst better to know than not to know. aged to sing along as movie clips for underage events. and types of karaoke out there for commandment was “safety fi rst.” A disturbing fact: About 15 play on monitors all around the you to choose from, you’re sure He warned that there is no such percent of all sore throats seen by bar. Featuring the songs of every 9:30 p.m., The Loading Zone is to choose from, you can get on to find one that fits your prefer- thing as 100 percent safe sex but that Student Health Services on campus musical from Oklahoma to Rent only for adults 21 and over. stage and rock out with the house ence. You can even try them all we should try to make it as safe as are actually throat infections from (with a few comedy clips thrown For those seeking the thrill of band Solstace or chill on the and find out what your style of possible by discussing our sexual his- STIs, not cold or fl u related. Wouldn’t in there as well), there is a wide the spotlight, search no further couches and let others have the singing really is. So the next time tories beforehand and using condoms you want to know if you had gonor- musical selection and enthusiastic than UR MOM’s Bar, where you glory. you are singing in the shower, as a precaution. rhea growing in the back of your participation from the crowd. can realize your dream and be the “You get the benefit of a good think of it as a warm-up for a Kerner isn’t the only one doling throat? More importantly, isn’t it your “It’s very jovial. People get lead singer of a band. Featuring backup band and the feel of a night out on the town, whether out this advice—health experts responsibility and your partner’s right up and dance on the bar and sing the only live-band karaoke in St. rock concert,” manager Scott you are in a group, rocking out everywhere are screaming for safer to be aware of what you have or don’t loudly,” bartender Michael Mul- Louis, the bar in Soulard is open Crosby said. “You’re on a real solo on stage or just enjoying the sex. This applies especially to St. have? len said. On most Tuesdays, the every Thursday and Saturday stage with the band, and the stage neighborhood feel. Louis, where the sexually transmitted If it’s price that’s keeping you crowd is diverse with a relatively night for the typical crowd of col- lights are on you.” disease (STD) rates are traditionally from the clinic, now you have no ex- equal gay to straight ratio and lege students and young profes- With an unlimited amount of high. Our city is also the country’s cuses: Student Health Services does many college kids and young cou- sionals to come unwind and sing songs for just a $5 cover charge, leader in rates of chlamydia and free HIV testing. Low-cost/no-cost ples partaking in the fun. Open at some tunes. With about 100 songs you can croon the night away for gonorrhea. STI testing is available at the follow- One of the easiest ways to prevent ing sites in St. Louis: MetroAIDS, the spread of infection is to know Planned Parenthood, Family Care about the health of yourself and your Health Centers, People’s Health partner before you engage in sexual Centers and the St. Louis County De- activity, which means getting tested partment of Health. More information and being honest about your sexual on their locations and phone numbers histories. is available on the Student Health Services Web site: http://shs.wustl. STI vs. STD edu/medicalServices/std.htm. All St. Art museum brings Power and Although sexually transmit- Louis clinics take walk-in clients, ted infection (STI) and sexually with no appointment necessary. transmitted disease are terms that are As for the testing itself, the sometimes used interchangeably, they procedures are relatively noninvasive, are not one and the same. According contrary to popular belief. Most tests Glory of ancient China to St. Louis to Student Health Services, STIs and include a urine test and a blood test, STDs are differentiated by the fact and more invasive procedures are re- that “disease” implies that the patient served for situations when the patient is experiencing clear symptoms and is, in fact, infected. signs. Infections are different in that It wouldn’t be reasonable to say they do not have visible signs or that one-night stands don’t happen or symptoms in affected people. This that you will have time to get tested means you could be carrying an before every sexual encounter you STI right now and be completely have. However, everyone should get unaware that you are a host for a tested for themselves, if only once as sexually transmitted virus or bacterial a baseline. If you have been hooking infection. up with someone continuously for Some of you may be wondering even a few weeks, it is perfectly ac- how it would be possible to have an ceptable for you to ask if he/she has STI and not know—to that, I would been tested and recommend that your tell you that a good friend of mine partner do so if he/she hasn’t yet. The recently found out she had the human two of you can even do it together papilloma virus, otherwise known as if that would make things more HPV, even though none of the guys comfortable. she had been with had any idea they Not sure how to bring it up? Say had it. Still, she got it from someone, you read a “Health Beat” article that so one of her previous partners must recommended you go and get tested. have been a carrier. Whether you’re dating, friends with benefi ts or hooking up, no relation- Getting tested ship is too stable or too impermanent Getting tested regularly for STIs to ask your partner to get tested and to and STDs should be part of your do the same for them.

COURTESY OF THE ASIAN ART MUSEUM ers and the artifacts. ings in white or green jade with From the tomb of Lady Chen, wife of Tong Bonian, in Dengfushan outside Alongside these massive pho- gold accents. of the Zhonghua gate, Nanjing: two dragons encircle a heart-shaped amber, tos are images of old China, in Everything in the collec- buried between 1647 and 1658. Made of amber and ruby; gold with repoussé the form of painted scrolls. These tion is accompanied by a short and fi ligree designs. paintings are mostly black-and- written explanation that includes white with gradations of gray and the artist, materials used and ap- Palace Museum in Beijing, the are almost all landscape paint- proximate date of creation. But Hana Schuster Nanjing Municipal Museum and ings, in accordance with tradi- if visitors are looking for a more Scene Reporter the Shanghai Museum. tional customs of Chinese high comprehensive discussion of the The display showcases more art. They feature strong towering significance of each piece, they than 125 works from the Ming mountains that fade into mist with may want to consider paying $3 The Saint Louis Art Museum Dynasty court, including paint- COURTESY OF ST. LOUIS ART MUSEUM intricate depictions of a village or extra for the iPod tour, which is currently featuring a truly ings, lacquerware, garments, hand The ‘Portrait of Prince Zhu Youyan in Ceremonial Uniform’ (1521-1524), an riverbank below. Upon closer in- offers in-depth explanations of remarkable exhibit called “Power scrolls, weaponry and various ornate scroll, hangs at the entrance of the exhibit. spection, viewers will also notice about 20 featured works, accom- and Glory: Court Arts of China’s decorative ornaments. All of the the inclusion of very small figures panied by tranquilizing traditional Ming Dynasty.” The exhibit artifacts were crafted by impe- intimately interacting with one Chinese music. opened Sunday, Feb. 22 and will rial manufacturers, court officials materials used are breathtaking. beautifully-colored and richly- another; these nearly-invisible However you decide to ex- remain on display until May 17 in and sometimes by the emperors Many of the decorative objects detailed silk hanging scroll that men and women are meant to plore the exhibit—whether alone the main exhibition gallery on the themselves. consist of beautiful gold moldings measures nearly 8 feet long. The counter the vast landscapes and or with friends, with or without first floor of the museum. What were once objects of and intricate carvings of jade or Prince’s pose is one of power and colossal mountains. the iPod—you are sure to leave “Power and Glory” is the first everyday courtly life now double amber inlaid with precious stones majesty, which sets the tone for In contrast to these huge with a deeper understanding of exhibition of its kind to focus on as magnificent works of art and metals, embodying the beauty the rest of the exhibit. pictures and painted scrolls, small the fascinating Ming Dynasty art from China’s Ming dynasty throughout the exhibition. The and opulence of the Ming court. As visitors wander through the standing cases throughout the and an appreciation for its art and (1368-1644). This collection craftsmanship of each piece is Upon entering, visitors first various rooms, they will notice exhibition house jewelry, artifacts culture. also marks the first collabora- extraordinary; the remarkable encounter the Portrait of Prince large photos of contemporary and ornaments. Many of the tion between three of China’s attention paid to minute details is Zhu Youyuan in Ceremonial China adorning entire walls, ornaments, some as small as two most prestigious institutions: the apparent in each artifact, and the Uniform, (1521-1524). This is a which culturally situate the view- inches, feature high-relief carv-