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HHH Song Book Summit Hash House Harrier Song Book With Special Thanks to Woodford:[email protected] (Flying Booger) Converted from MSWord 2 files dated January, 1994 The material assembled herein has flunked every test of political, religious, sexual, and ethnic correctness known to man. Public performance of these songs will cause persons of refinement to swoon, and every one of them is guaranteed to offend somebody (in some cases, everybody). Hashers, thankfully, don't give a damn who they offend. That's why Hashers are my kind of people. This collection was made possible by the efforts of Hashers around the world, who freely share their favorite songs. In turn, everything here is meant to be shared. You're welcome to reproduce any part, or all, of this songbook (but be careful with the Monty Python stuff, which is copyrighted but too good to leave out of a Hash songbook—ed). This is a work in progress, with plenty of room to grow. If you know good songs (or bad) you don't see here, please send them to me for inclusion in future editions. I'll be happy to give you credit. My address is in the back. Hash Hymns III is dedicated to Hash House Harriers everywhere, especially my friends of the Tampa, Other Orlando, Phoenix, Okinawa, Hong Kong (Little Sai Wan, Hong Kong, and Southside), Bangkok (Saturday and Monday), Darwin, Orange County, Long Beach, Osan Bulgogi, Seoul, Tacoma, Puget Sound, Singapore (Lion City), San Diego, Fog City, East Bay/Mt. Diablo, San Francisco City, Honolulu, Aloha, Hilo, and Hawaii Full Moon Hash House Harriers. More thanks are due to the infamous Hammersley Hash, the North Shore Hussies (Auckland), and the Rotorua Hashes, our New Zealand hosts at InterHash 1994. Special thanks also to ZiPpy, Bollox, Beaver Bam Bam Balls, Ian Cumming, Sauer Krotch, Dum B.U.F, and Mr. Ed Cray (no hash name). Yet more thanks are due to the men and women of Air Force fighter squadrons, who started me singing and taught me all the basics. Without their help this songbook wouldn't weigh nearly as much. Note to Song Masters: Hashers love to sing, but not many of them want to buy a big thick songbook just so they can learn new songs. And even when they do, they usually forget to bring it to the hash. As a song master, I've had better luck copying one or two songs from this collection every time we hash, then handing out the copies at the circle. It's a great strategy to get people singing, and probably the best way to use this songbook. On-On! Flying Booger Grand Master, Aloha Hash House Harriers Joint Master, Hawaii Full Moon Hash House Harriers Song Master at Large TABLE OF CONTENTS DOWN-DOWN DITTIES 1. BLESSING OF THE HARES 1 2. DOES A HASHER 1 3. DUMB SHIT 1 4. FT EUSTIS HASH SONGS 1 5. HASH HOUSE HARRIERS 1 6. HERE'S TO _______ 1 7. HERE'S TO BROTHER HASHER(S) 2 8. HE'S A HASHER, HE'S OKAY 2 9. INTERNATIONAL HASH HYMN 2 10. MEET THE HASHERS 2 11. PISS OFF, YA WANK 2 12. SALUTATIONS 2 13. SEXIATUS MANIA 2 14. SHORT HYMN 2 15. SOUND OF HASHERS 2 16. THERE WAS A LITTLE BIRD 3 17. THEY OUGHT TO BE PUBLICLY PISSED ON 3 18. WEDDING SONG 3 19. WE'RE HERE BECAUSE . 3 20. WHAT A WANK 3 21. WHY ARE WE WAITING? 3 22. WHY WAS HE BORN SO BEAUTIFUL? 3 23. WHY WAS SHE BORN A BITCH? 3 24. YANKEE DOODLE 3 25. YOU ARE MY HASHIT 4 26. ZICKY-ZACKY 4 27. ZULU WARRIOR 4 ANIMAL FRIENDS 28. BESTIALITY'S BEST 4 29. BITCH A DOG 5 30. BYE BYE BLACKBIRD 6 31. CATS ON THE ROOFTOPS 6 32. COCK ROBIN 7 33. COW KICKED NELLY 7 34. CUCKOO 7 35. DEAD DOG ROVER 8 36. DOGGIES' MEETING 8 37. FUCK A DUCK 8 38. GOMEZ THE CHIHUAHUA 8 39. HOG CALLING TIME IN NEBRASKA 9 40. LITTLE BROWN MOUSE 9 41. LOBSTER SONG 9 42. MOOSE SONG 9 43. OLD BROWN COW 10 45. RHODE ISLAND RED 10 46. SEXUAL LIFE OF THE CAMEL 10 47. TEDDY BEARS' PICNIC 11 48. VIRGIN STURGEON 11 49. WILD WEST SHOW 11 50. WOODPECKER SONG 13 51. YOGI BEAR SONG 13 THE SPOKEN WORD 52. ESKIMO NELL 13 53. HASH JOKES 16 54. LIMERICKS 21 55. POETRY 28 56. RECITALS 29 57. SHIT LIST 30 58. TOASTS 31 SWEET LOVIN' 59. A FEW OF MY FAVORITE THINGS 32 60. A, YOU'VE GOT ASSHOLE STAINS 32 61. ALI BOOGIE 32 62. BALL OF KERRYMUIR 33 63. BALL OF YARN 35 64. BALLAD OF THE BOBBITT HILLBILLIES 35 65. BIG BAMBOO 35 66. BIG RED ROSE 36 67. BOOM, OOOH, YAKATATA 36 68. BY THE LIGHT 36 69. CHAPPED HIDE 36 70. CUCUMBER SONG 36 71. DON'T THAT BASTARD GET ANY BIGGER? 36 72. DON'T SAY NO 37 73. ENGINEER'S DREAM 37 74. FONDLE ME WITH CARE 37 75. FURBURGER KING 38 76. GANG BANG 38 77. GIVE ME A CLONE 38 78. GONORRHEA 39 79. GREAT BIG WHEEL 39 80. GREEN GROW THE RASHES O 39 81. HARVEST OF LOVE 40 82. HELLO PENIS 40 83. HERPES FAMILY 40 84. HERPES SONG 40 85. HOT VAGINA 40 86. HOW ASHAMED I WAS 41 87. HOW TO HANDLE A DATE 41 88. I DON'T WANT TO JOIN THE ARMY 41 89. I DON'T WANT TO JOIN THE CONVENT 42 90. IF I WERE THE MARRYING KIND 42 91. I LIKE COCK 42 92. I LIKE CUNT 42 93. I'LL NEVER PISS AGAIN 42 94. I LOVE MY WIFE 43 95. INCEST IS BEST 43 96. INCEST TIME IN TEXAS 43 97. I PUT MY HAND 43 98. I PUT MY LIPS 44 99. ISN'T IT AWFULLY NICE TO HAVE A PENIS? 44 100. ISN'T IT GREAT TO HAVE A CLITORIS? 44 101. I'VE GOT A START ON A TWELVE- INCH HARD-ON 44 102. I'VE GOT THE CLAP AGAIN 44 103. KEYHOLE SONG 45 104. LET ME BALL YOU SWEETHEART 45 105. MAN TRAP 45 106. MARRIAGE A LA MODE 46 107. MASTURBATION (FORNICATION) 46 108. MASTURBATION SONG 47 109. MY LITTLE PINK PANTIES 47 110. MY ONE-SKIN 47 111. NECROPHILIA SONG (MY NAME IS JACK) 47 112. NO BALLS AT ALL 49 113. NONE IS BIGGER THAN MINE 49 114. ONE-EYED TROUSER SNAKE 49 115. PORTIONS OF A WOMAN 50 116. PREGNANCY (AND VARIATIONS) 50 117. PUBIC HAIRS! 50 118. PUT YOUR LEFT LEG OVER MY SHOULDER 50 119. PUT YOUR LEGS ROUND MY SHOULDERS (HARRIERS) 51 120. PUT YOUR LEGS ROUND MY SHOULDERS (HARRIETTES) 51 121. RAWHIDE 51 122. RINGADANGDOO 51 123. ROLL ME OVER IN THE CLOVER 52 124. SEVEN NERVOUS DAYS 52 125. SEX IS BORING 52 126. SIT ON MY FACE (VERSION # 1) 53 127. SIT ON MY FACE (VERSION # 2) 53 128. SIT ON MY FACE AND TELL ME THAT YOU LOVE ME 53 129. SUNSTROKE, SYPHILIS, VARICOSE VEINS 53 130. SUPERCALLOUSFLAGELL- ISTICSEXPECTCUNNILINGUS 53 131. SYPHILIS 54 132. THE TRIANGLE 54 133. THESE FOOLISH THINGS 54 134. WAVES AND WAVES 55 135. WEDDING SONG 55 136. WHEN THE END OF THE MONTH ROLLS AROUND 55 137. WHO NEEDS SEX? 56 138. WILL YOU MARRY ME? 56 HASH CALISTHENICS 139. BUTTON FACTORY 56 140. DUNKIRK 56 141. FATHER ABRAHAM 57 142. HANKY PANKY 57 143. IF I HAD A HARD-ON 57 144. LION-HUNT SONG 58 145. MACDONALD'S FARM 58 146. MUSIC MAN 59 147. ONE ON THE TABLE 59 148. SINGING IN THE RAIN 59 149. TWELVE DAYS OF RAMADAN 59 FAMOUS HARRIETTES 150. AAHLAWETA (HARRIERS' VERSION) 60 151. ALL THE NICE GIRLS 60 152. CAROLINA 61 153. CLEMENTINE 61 154. DAISY, DAISY 61 155. DEAD WHORE 61 156. DINAH 62 157. DYING HARLOT 62 158. FUCKIN' HELL SHE'S UGLY 63 159. GIRL FROM BALTIMORE 63 160. HARLOT OF JERUSALEM 64 161. LADY HARDONNA 65 162. LULU 65 163. LUPE 66 164. MADELINE SCHMIDT 66 165. MARY 66 166. MARY ANNE BURNS 67 167. MARY ANN McCARTHY 67 168. MAYOR OF BAYSWATER'S DAUGHTER 67 169. M-O-T-H-E-R 68 170. MRS. PUGGY-WUGGY 69 171. MY GIRL'S A VEGETABLE 69 172. MY MOTHER-IN-LAW 69 173. MY SISTER LILY 69 174. NANCY BROWN 70 175. NELLIE DARLING 70 176. NELLIE 'AWKINS 70 177. ON TOP OF OLD SOPHIE 71 178. POOR LIL 71 179. POOR LITTLE ANGELINE 71 180. SALLY IN THE ALLEY 72 181. S & M GIRL 72 182. SEVEN OLD LADIES 73 183. SHE'S A MOST IMMORAL LADY 73 184. SHORT SONG 73 185. SUCKANYA 73 186. SWEET ANTOINETTE 74 187. WHEN LADY JANE BECAME A TART 74 188. WINNIPEG WHORE 74 189. YOU TAKE THE LEGS OFF BETTY GRABLE 74 FAMOUS HARRIERS 190. AAHLAWETTA (HARRIETTES' VERSION) 74 191. BALLS OF O'LEARY 75 192. BARNACLE BILL 75 193. BASTARD KING OF ENGLAND 75 194. CHRISTOPHER ROBIN 76 195. CLINTON'S QUEEN BERETS 76 196. COLOMBO (GOOD SHIP VENUS) 76 197. DRUNKEN SAILOR 78 198. FIREMAN'S SONG 78 199. FRIAR OF GREAT RENOWN 78 200. FUCK THE GIANT PENIS 78 201. GAY CABALLERO 79 202. HEIGH-HO SAYS ROWLEY 79 203. HE'S A CUNT 79 204. HITLER, HE ONLY HAD ONE BALL 80 205. I'M YOUR MAILMAN 80 206. INBRED MAN 80 207. INSIDE THOSE RED PLUSH BREECHES 80 208.
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