May 2014 BRONX/RIVERDALE FORARTS KIDSFREE Family Where Every Child Matters
THE Mother’s Day ISSUE • 6 new surprises about moms • Moms who volunteer • How stay-at- home moms can build a circle of friends
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Features columns 6 The science of moms 10 FabuLYSS Finds Six surprising things you may not know by Lyss Stern about mothers By KiKi Bochi 18 Just Write Mom by Danielle Sullivan 8 Lessons in volunteering 14 20 Dear Dr. Karyn from mom By Dr. Karyn Gordon By Tammy Scileppi 21 Divorce & Separation 12 Circle of friends By Lee Chabin, Esq. Thirty days to a healthier social life By Christa Melnyk Hines 21 The Book Worm 14 Take note By terri schlichenmeyer How to tell when your child is ready for 26 Ask an Attorney music lessons By Alison Arden Besunder, Esq. By Leila Viss 33 Lions and Tigers and Teens 16 Three ways to nurture By myrna beth haskell creativity Ignite their imaginations with these 34 Good Sense Eating by Christine M. Palumbo, RD helpful tips By Michele Ranard 22 Safe in the water calendar Tips to help prevent drowning 28 May Events 24 The missing Renew your commitment to safety this special sections Missing Kids Awareness Month By Jamie Lober 17 Arts Directory 28 33 The Marketplace
May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 3 Letter from the publisher Mother’s Day musings
’ve been watch- emerged after an ex- that matures out of the adolescent miracle that changed our lives for- ing this wonderful hausting 13 hours. that drove you crazy and wouldn’t ever. I, for one, can honestly say that I series on PBS that Being a Mother is not listen anymore and the mutual bond it was the best thing that has every airs on Sunday nights always fun. In the early of adults who happen to be parents happened to me. with the title “Call the weeks after birth there and their children. Wishing all of you the Happy Midwife.” It takes place are the every few hours It’s an amazing miracle and Mother’s Day you most likely gener- in the east end of Lon- wake-ups, feedings and whether you’re a natural Mom or ously deserve. Enjoy all the memo- don in the 1950s and a baby sometimes cry- an adoptive Mom or a Step-Mom, ries and all the milestones, those reflects the changing ing and you don’t know the miracle is the same. To watch that have passed, and those yet to experience of birthing why. There is the frus- the development of another human come. Let someone pamper you a and parenting as the tration of the teen years being is truly awesome. To have a bit this Mother’s Day if it comes your war years dimmed into the past. and the loss of control over the child major role in that development is a way, and enjoy the best part of all, It’s one of the most socially relevant you had that is now often taller than privilege and a gift and it’s hard to the fact that there is someone in this shows I’ve ever seen about being a you and more influenced by friends imagine a role in life that could be world who calls you Mother. Mother and birthing a child and the and the media than by you. quite as satisfying, quite as fulfilling Thanks for reading. network of community. But most of it is sheer bliss. The over a lifetime. Reliving all the pregnancies and tiny infant that suddenly develops The celebration of Mother’s Day the births every week has rekindled a personality; the first steps; the offers an opportunity for our chil- my own maternal experience from first time you hear your child say dren to make us a breakfast or buy the first fluttering I felt in the bath Mama; the first day of preschool; the us a meal in a restaurant or at the one night, to the hours of labor and graduations; the growth spurts that very least to recognize our constant Susan Weiss-Voskidis, birth, to the 23 years since that make yesterdays clothes and shoes love in their lives and say thank you. Publisher/Excutive Editor moment when my daughter at last a thing of the past; the young adult For us, it’s a day to be grateful for a [email protected]
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May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 5 The science of moms Six surprising BY KIKI BOCHI others may be the things you glue that holds M many families to- gether, but no two mommies may not are alike. Still, there are some things moms do have know about in common — and at the top of that list is the huge impact they have on the lives of mothers their children. To get to the core of these very important family figures, moms are the subject of scientific studies all over the world. Here is the good news in some of the findings.
Good moms have smarter kids School-age children whose mothers nurtured them early in life have brains with a larger hippocampus, a key structure important to learn- ing, memory, and response to stress, according to re- search in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. The research, by child psychiatrists and neurosci- entists at Washington Uni- versity School of Medicine, was Being an empathetic Attentive moms help the first to show that a mother’s mom goes a long way keep kids off drugs nurturing is linked to this critical Nurturing mothers have always Through daily interactions, good region of children’s brain anatomy. garnered accolades for kissing moms help children understand “This study validates something boo-boos and soothing children healthy boundaries, learn self-con- that seems to be intuitive, which to sleep with lullabies. Now they’re trol and make good decisions. But is just how important nurturing getting credit for their offspring’s it goes beyond that. parents are to creating adaptive physical health in middle age. A strong mother-child bond in human beings,” research author Dr. In a long-term study published in childhood, especially in the first Joan L. Luby, said when the study the journal Psychological Science, three years of life, develops the was released. “I think the public psychologists found that even brain chemistry that can help health implications suggest that we among groups that would have people resist drug and alcohol ad- should pay more attention to par- higher rates of chronic illness in dition later in life. The research, ents’ nurturing, and we should do adulthood, adults who had nurtur- conducted in Australia, found that what we can as a society to foster ing mothers in childhood fared bet- some people’s lack of resilience to these skills because clearly nurtur- ter in physical health in midlife. It’s addictive behaviors may be linked ing has a very, very big impact on just more proof of the huge impact to poor development of their oxy- later development.” good moms can have. tocin systems. 6 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 “The public health implications suggest that we should pay more attention to parents’ nurturing, and we should do Best summer what we can as a society to foster these skills because clearly nurturing has a very, ever! very big impact on later development.” *VU]LUPLU[S`SVJH[LK[V[OL)YVU_ HUKSV^LY>LZ[JOLZ[LY The antidote? A loving and nur- while the stress-marking cortisol 0THNPUL¶ZVJSVZL[VOVTL turing mom, of course. washed away. The video-watching [OLYL»ZHJHTW^P[OHNYLH[ group did not experience the same Moms teach their benefits. ^H[LYMYVU[L_WLYPLUJLHUK children without T\JOTVYL;OLYL»ZL]LU even trying Sometimes, less [YHUZWVY[H[PVUH]HPSHISL Scientists have discovered that mom is more babies only hours old are able to When you plop on the floor to 4VZ[PTWVY[HU[RPKZ^PSS differentiate between sounds from play with your child, there’s more SVVRMVY^HYK[VLHJOKH`VM their native language and a foreign going on than just a game. In a Z\TTLYMVY! language. This finding indicates study that looked at the dynamics that babies begin absorbing lan- of play, researchers found that the ;LUUPZ guage while still in the womb dur- more moms tried to control the ing the last 10 weeks of pregnancy, content and pace of the game, the ZHPSPUN earlier than previously thought. more children pulled away. Chil- RH`HRPUN “The mother has first dibs on dren in the study also expressed Z^PTTPUNSLZZVUZ influencing the child’s brain,” said more negative feelings toward ^H[LYNHTLZ Patricia Kuhl, co-author and co-di- their mothers when the mothers rector of the Institute for Learning were highly directive. For example, 73<: & Brain Sciences at the University during play with her child, a highly of Washington. “The vowel sounds directive mother might make her HY[ZHUKJYHM[Z in her speech are the loudest units, toddler put the plastic cow in the ZVJJLY and the fetus locks onto them.” toy barn through the barn’s door IHZRL[IHSS Now, if we could just start training instead of through its window. them to pick up their room while in While mothers often think they [LUUPZH[[OLULHYI` the womb. are helping their children by cor- 5L^@VYR;LUUPZ*S\I recting them, they are limiting the HU\[YP[PV\ZI\MML[S\UJOL]LY`KH` Mom’s voice is as children’s creativity and taking the L_WLYPLUJLKJHYPUNJV\UZLSVYZ comforting as a hug fun out of the game, said Jean Ispa, A simple phone call from mom lead author of the study. 0[»ZHSS^HP[PUNMVY`V\YJHTWLYH[[OLILH\[PM\S can calm frayed nerves by spark- “Children flourish when they ing the release of a powerful have opportunities to make choices HJYL4HYP[PTL*VSSLNLJHTW\Z*HTWPZ^H` stress-quelling hormone, accord- about what they do, particularly in JSVZLY[OHU`V\[OPURHUKP[ÄSSZ\WMHZ[¶ZV ing to researchers. The study, at play situations,” said Ispa, and pro- JVU[HJ[\Z[VKH` the University of Wisconsin-Mad- fessor of human development and ison, looked at a group of 7- to family studies at the University of 12-year-old girls who were chal- Missouri. “Mothers who are highly Come to our Open House! lenged to answer math questions directive do not allow that kind of in front of a panel of strangers. A choice.” May 4 & May 17, 12-3PM third of the girls were comforted Moms can counter that effect by their mothers in person with a with affection, however. Call now for your appointment. hug or pat on the back, a third were “Children take in the meaning 718.239.7919 given a neutral video to watch, and of what their mothers are trying to a third were allowed to talk to their do, so if a mom is being very direc- mom on the phone. tive and is generally a very warm =PZP[^^^HK]HU[HNLJHTWZUL[ The results were dramatic: the person, I think the child feels, ‘My ,THPSWMVU[HUH'HK]HU[HNL[LUUPZJS\IZJVT children who got to interact with mom is doing this because she their mothers had virtually the cares about me, and she’s trying same positive hormonal response, to do the best for me,’ ” Ispa said. *HSS whether they interacted in person “If that warmth is missing, then the or over the phone. The girls’ lev- child might feel, ‘My mom is trying els of oxytocin, often called the to control me, and I don’t like it.’ ” “love hormone” and strongly as- KiKi Bochi is a mother of two who sociated with emotional bonding, still marvels at her power. A long- rose significantly among the girls time journalist, she writes about fam- who had contact with their moms, ily health.
May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 7 Maria Cuomo Cole (second from right) with her mother Matilda, nieces and Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand.
in her footsteps. As an active, hands-on chair of HELP USA — a leading provider of homes, jobs, and services to home- less families, veterans, and victims of domestic violence — Maria, who is also a film producer, shares with NY Parenting’s readers why the work HELP USA does for the homeless and at-risk community, nationwide, is so important. Tammy Scileppi: Why did you embrace HELP USA? Maria Cuomo Cole: When my brother, Andrew, became involved with solving homelessness in the mid-1980s, our friends were all ex- cited to be part of his important mis- sion. My father had completed his first term as governor and we were now working in the private sector, but pining for more public service. Andrew and my father’s mission in- spired me. The issue of homelessness is Photo by Don Pollard growing at an alarming rate. For Helping those less fortunate also children, homelessness can be trau- puts things in perspective: when matic at so many levels. kids are feeling down or sorry Across the top 13 major cities in Lessons in for themselves, they can appreci- the US, there was an increase of three ate what they have when they’re percent in homelessness last year, ac- exposed to someone who is truly cording to the US Conference of May- needy or homeless. ors 2013 report on homelessness. Take it from the Cuomos — one TS: Please describe a family’s or volunteering philanthropic family with volunteer- single parent’s experience, and how ism in its veins. they benefited from HELP USA’s ser- Inspiring mother-daughter duo — vices. former first lady of New York State MCC: I could name numerous fam- Matilda Cuomo and daughter Maria ilies; mothers, fathers, children, who from mom Cuomo Cole — have made a big dif- have gained a fresh living in HELP ference in the lives of many New USA’s quality and caring shelter en- BY TAMMY SCILEPPI Yorkers. vironment, and in our permanent Maria and her husband, popular housing, with an array of supportive ids learn about helping oth- fashion designer Kenneth Cole, have services. Many of our facilities have ers at home. As a mom, you three daughters: Amanda, Catie, and extensive and customized programs K have the ability to inspire Emily. Maria’s father is former Gov. for families and single mothers, in- your children through positive ac- Mario Cuomo, and she is the sister of cluding early childhood education, tions, such as volunteering in your Gov. Andrew Cuomo, CNN journalist daycare, after school programs, community. Chris Cuomo, Margaret Cuomo and mentoring, and many others. It can turn into a family activity Madeline Cuomo. Perhaps, part of the reason HELP and is a great way to get your kids Growing up, Maria learned the USA has been so effective is due and teens away from their phones value of giving back by watching her to their innovative strategies in ad- and computers. mother, a teacher. Matilda has al- dressing the alarming problem of And for kids, interacting with ways championed important causes homelessness. They address all as- other young volunteers is cool, espe- in her community and beyond. She pects of life. HELP USA offers job cially for kids and teens who would founded Mentoring USA, a leading training, employment counseling, like to make new friends or boost national, one-to-one, site-based men- and after-school care. They even their social skills. They can also toring program that provides caring, have a street soccer program. learn about a field they might be trained mentors to young people TS: How do you celebrate Moth- interested in as they head off to ages 7 through 21 — including chil- er’s Day? college, and even advance their ca- dren from foster care programs — MCC: Despite our busy schedules, reer goals while they’re in college, to enable them to realize their full we make family a main priority. We by helping out with an organization potential. try to spend the holidays together. that matches their interests and pas- Maria, who says she is still in- A second interview with Matilda sions. They may even get a job offer. spired by her mother, has followed Cuomo will be coming next month. 8 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 Are you feeling stressed? Are you at wits end? We help you provide the best for your children 1BSFOUJOHBOEHFOFSBMDPVOTFMJOHt(VJEBODFPOFòFDUJWFDIJMEEJTDJQMJOF 3FGFSSBMTUPFOUJUMFNFOUTBOETVQQPSUTFSWJDFT "EWPDBDZ Family Enrichment Program Parenting Support Services LOCATION BRONXWORKS 1130 Grand Concourse, Bronx, NY 10456 C ONTACT Jonathan Morgenstern LCSW, Director (718) 508-3160 [email protected] Bronxworks helps individuals and families improve their economic and social well-being. From toddlers to seniors, we feed, shelter, teach, and support our neighbors to build a stronger community. Funded under agreement with NYC Children’s Services
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May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 9 WOMEN Mother’s Day ideas n Mother’s Day, Sunday, May [135 W. 42nd St. between Seventh Madison Avenue on a sunny spring 11, treat the mom in your life and Sixth avenues, (212) 319–1660, char- Sunday is something all moms enjoy O to a FabULyss day in New liepalmer.com] — and need every once in a while York. Not to mention, the location seg- for all their hard work! When mom Scheduling the perfect Mother’s ues perfectly into our second Moth- picks out something special, hand Day will take some work, but with er’s Day celebration suggestion: her a card from you and the kids — our DivaMoms suggestions below, A Broadway Show! Taking the and signed by other family members Mother’s Day planning can be made special, hardworking mother in your — to go along with her new gift she FABULYSS a little easier! life — whether she be your wife and handpicked and will cherish. Brunch. Take the special mom the mother of your kids or your own Top of the Rock. Living in New FINDS in your life to a beautiful, special mom — is a treat that will inevitably York, we seldom visit tourist attrac- LYSS STERN brunch spot! Aureole on W. 42nd result in wonderful memories for tions. Taking the kids and mom to Street — the city’s famous theatre years to come. There are such Fab- the Top of the Rock is a sweet way to district — is a gorgeous and DeLys- ULyss shows out on Broadway right show her she deserves only the most scious option for a Mother’s Day now that the whole family can enjoy, beautiful things; if you haven’t seen it, brunch, and one of my personal fa- including “Matilda,” “Wicked,” “If/ the view is breathtaking! This is also vorites! Dining at the contemporary Then,” “Newsies,” “Aladdin,” “Rocky,” a great spot to snap a few family pho- Aureole is staged in two venues: or, if she is into the more unique and tos that will go in your most precious the formal dining room and more less mainstream shows, something family photo albums. Tickets are $20 casual bar room. In the dining room, like “Stomp,” “Lady Day,” or “Act for an adult, but completely worth it! terra-rich colors and golden light- One” may be something she would [30 Rockefeller plaza between W. ing combine to create a comfort- enjoy. Either way, you cannot beat 50th and W. 49th streets, (212) 698– able environment and opulent warm the quality and thoughtfulness of a 2000, www.topoftherocknyc.com] glow, reminiscent of Aureole’s origi- Broadway show on Mother’s Day! Elizabeth Arden Red Door Spa nal townhouse intimacy. The menu Shop. There isn’t a DivaMom out (or the spa of her choice!). End the is FabULyss-for American food, and there who doesn’t enjoy a day or two day by treating the hard-working even the DivaKids will be able to find out of the year shopping for little lux- mom in your life to a premium spa in something they like! The Arlington uries! If you are stuck on what to buy the city — like Elizabeth Arden Red Club, Sarabeth’s, Laconda her, make hunting for her gift part of Door, which is absolutely wonder- Verde and Gina La the fun of the day! Strolling around ful and luxurious — and hand her a Fornarina are also Barney’s, Bergdorf Goodman, or any gift certificate to use for a massage, great suggestions. of the shops on facial, or whatever her favorite treat- ment is! This will let her unwind from the day’s fun activities and let her know that her family appreciates ev- erything she does! Show her how much you love her. [663 Fifth Ave. be- tween W. 53rd and E. 52nd streets, (212) 546– 0200, reddoorspas.com] Lyss Stern is the founder of DivaLysscious Moms (www.divamoms. com).
10 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 WOMEN 5`SOb4cbc`Sa 97>A0/G Mother’s Day ideas AbO`b6S`S n Mother’s Day, Sunday, May [135 W. 42nd St. between Seventh Madison Avenue on a sunny spring 11, treat the mom in your life and Sixth avenues, (212) 319–1660, char- Sunday is something all moms enjoy O to a FabULyss day in New liepalmer.com] — and need every once in a while York. Not to mention, the location seg- for all their hard work! When mom Scheduling the perfect Mother’s ues perfectly into our second Moth- picks out something special, hand 0]ga5W`Za$³ Day will take some work, but with er’s Day celebration suggestion: her a card from you and the kids — our DivaMoms suggestions below, A Broadway Show! Taking the and signed by other family members 2Oga¿ZZSR %ESSY>`]U`O[8c\S! bV³/cUcab #bV FABULYSS Mother’s Day planning can be made special, hardworking mother in your — to go along with her new gift she AeW[[W\UA^]`ba3RcQObW]\OZ/QbWdWbWSa a little easier! life — whether she be your wife and handpicked and will cherish. eWbV4c\Ac\ /`ba1`OTba>S`T]`[W\U/`ba Brunch. Take the special mom the mother of your kids or your own Top of the Rock. Living in New 4O[WZg2Og1O`\WdOZ FINDS in your life to a beautiful, special mom — is a treat that will inevitably York, we seldom visit tourist attrac- @SUWabS`<]e 4WSZRB`W^ab]>O`Ya=cbR]]`/RdS\bc`Sa LYSS STERN brunch spot! Aureole on W. 42nd result in wonderful memories for tions. Taking the kids and mom to 4`WS\Ra Street — the city’s famous theatre years to come. There are such Fab- the Top of the Rock is a sweet way to /<2A=;C16;=@3 district — is a gorgeous and DeLys- ULyss shows out on Broadway right show her she deserves only the most scious option for a Mother’s Day now that the whole family can enjoy, beautiful things; if you haven’t seen it, brunch, and one of my personal fa- including “Matilda,” “Wicked,” “If/ the view is breathtaking! This is also vorites! Dining at the contemporary Then,” “Newsies,” “Aladdin,” “Rocky,” a great spot to snap a few family pho- 4`SRS`WQ@ ;O`UO`Sb1]cRS`b1ZcPV]caS :cQWZS>OZ[O`]1ZcPV]caS Aureole is staged in two venues: or, if she is into the more unique and tos that will go in your most precious '!#2` ;O`bW\:9W\U8` 0ZdR '! @O\ROZZ/dS\cS the formal dining room and more less mainstream shows, something family photo albums. Tickets are $20 casual bar room. In the dining room, like “Stomp,” “Lady Day,” or “Act for an adult, but completely worth it! 0`]\f RIVERDALE COUNTRY SCHOOL Bronx, NY 718.432.1013 www.esfcamps.com/Riverdale May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 11 Circle of friends BY CHRISTA MELNYK HINES likely to suffer from depression com- better. Arrange a time to meet with Thirty days pared to men. you and your kids for a play date at elocations, new babies, and “When there is a lack of social in- the park or the mall play area. to a healthier other life transitions can teraction and a decrease of peer-to- s 3 E N D A &ACEBOOK FRIEND REQUEST R throw a wrench in your social peer contact, there is great potential TO A MOM YOUVE MET RECENTLY )NITIAT- network, leaving you feeling discon- for depression, which is a combina- ing friendships shows you welcome social life nected and lonely. Use the adjust- tion of sadness and anger,” says Lisa new friends and boosts your self- ment period as a chance to make a Bahar, a marriage and family thera- confidence. fresh start. Carefully consider your pist and professional counselor. s 6OLUNTEER 9OUR EFFORTS WILL POSI- priorities and build connections that One day at a time, rev up your TIVELY IMPACT OTHERS AND YOULL DE- support your personal health and social engine for increased happi- rive satisfaction and joy from help- the well-being of your family. ness and satisfaction. Here are a few ing out. Women who feel a balanced sense suggestions. s 3 H A KE OUT THE WELCOME MAT of connection are healthier and s * O I N A MOTHERS GROUP 9OUR Greet your new neighbors with a more resilient to stress, anxiety, and sense of self-worth and sense of be- PLATE OF WARM COOKIES 4HEYLL AP- depression. According to a recent longing increases when part of a preciate your thoughtfulness and a Gallup poll, stay-at-home moms are group of supportive friends. friendly face in a new neighborhood. more vulnerable to depression com- s # A L L AN OLD FRIEND 2ECONNECTING s 3 T R I KE UP A CONVERSATION +IDS pared to women who work outside of helps you rebuild your confidence as ARE GREAT ICEBREAKERS %VEN A CASUAL the home, and isolation could play a you meet new moms. conversation with another mom can factor. Overall, women are twice as s % M A I L A MOM YOUD LIKE TO KNOW cheer you. 12 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 $INNER DONE KIDS SLEEP WELL AND Stay-at-home moms YOURE REWARDED WITH A QUIET EVE- NING AHEAD “ ” are more vulnerable to s #OORDINATE A GROUP OUTING AT THE ZOO OR A CHILDRENS MUSEUM NY Times depression compared "OTH YOU AND YOUR KIDS WILL AP- PRECIATE THE SOCIAL INTERACTION EX- to women who work ERCISE AND EDUCATION THESE VENUES outside of the home. 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YOUR ENERGY OTHER WOMEN badcan build a circle of Circle of friends s 3 E E K BALANCE IN YOUR YESES s 4A KE A BREAK 3CHEDULE TIME bulliesfriends FindFind usus online at www.NYParenting.com BY CHRISTA MELNYK HINES likely to suffer from depression com- better. Arrange a time to meet with 3TRESS LESS BY SAYING hNOv TO RE- ALONE TO HEAD TO A POTTERY PLACE Thirty days pared to men. you and your kids for a play date at QUESTS THAT ARENT A PRIORITY OR AND PAINT GO CLOTHES SHOPPING OR elocations, new babies, and “When there is a lack of social in- the park or the mall play area. DONT INTEREST YOU 9OUR FAMILY WILL WATCH A MOVIE to a healthier other life transitions can teraction and a decrease of peer-to- s 3 E N D A &ACEBOOK FRIEND REQUEST THANK YOU s 2EGROUP WITH YOUR KIDS 3ET R throw a wrench in your social peer contact, there is great potential TO A MOM YOUVE MET RECENTLY )NITIAT- s ' O ON A MINI ADVENTURE %X- ASIDE A RELAXING AFTERNOON TO RE- network, leaving you feeling discon- for depression, which is a combina- ing friendships shows you welcome PLORE ANOTHER PART OF TOWN DIS- CONNECT WITH YOUR KIDS (EAD TO social life nected and lonely. Use the adjust- tion of sadness and anger,” says Lisa new friends and boosts your self- COVER A LOCAL MUSEUM OR TAKE A THE PARK FOR A PICNIC LUNCH PLAY A Check us out! ment period as a chance to make a Bahar, a marriage and family thera- confidence. CLASS THAT INTERESTS YOU 3TEPPING BOARD GAME TRY ICE SKATING OR GO fresh start. Carefully consider your pist and professional counselor. s 6OLUNTEER 9OUR EFFORTS WILL POSI- OUT OF YOUR NORMAL ROUTINE JUICES BOWLING priorities and build connections that One day at a time, rev up your TIVELY IMPACT OTHERS AND YOULL DE- YOUR CREATIVITY s 4O U C H BASE WITH YOUR FAMILY s - A KE TIME TO PLAY #ARVE OUT HEAROUND T DINNER TABLE #OMMU- NYParenting.com support your personal health and social engine for increased happi- rive satisfaction and joy from help- the well-being of your family. ness and satisfaction. Here are a few ing out. OR MINUTES TO PURSUE AN ACTIV- NICATION BUILDS STRONGER FAMILIES Women who feel a balanced sense suggestions. s 3 H A KE OUT THE WELCOME MAT ITY YOU LOVE 0LAYING IS CANDY FOR 4ALK ABOUT YOUR DAYS HIGHS AND of connection are healthier and s * O I N A MOTHERS GROUP 9OUR Greet your new neighbors with a THE SOUL LOWS DISCUSS FRUSTRATIONS AND CEL- more resilient to stress, anxiety, and sense of self-worth and sense of be- PLATE OF WARM COOKIES 4HEYLL AP- s 3TART A WALKING GROUP 7ALKING EBRATE SUCCESSES depression. According to a recent longing increases when part of a preciate your thoughtfulness and a AND TALKING FOR AN HOUR IS GREAT EX- Freelance journalist Christa Melnyk Gallup poll, stay-at-home moms are group of supportive friends. friendly face in a new neighborhood. ERCISE AND LIKE FREE THERAPY Hines is the author of “Confidently more vulnerable to depression com- s # A L L AN OLD FRIEND 2ECONNECTING s 3 T R I KE UP A CONVERSATION +IDS s $ I N E AND PLAY )NVITE OTHER Connected: A Mom’s Guide to a Satis- Where every family matters and where pared to women who work outside of helps you rebuild your confidence as ARE GREAT ICEBREAKERS %VEN A CASUAL MOMS WHOSE HUSBANDS TRAVEL OR fying Social Life.” Join her in the “Con- New York parents find help, info and support. the home, and isolation could play a you meet new moms. conversation with another mom can WORK LATE FOR A TWO HOUR AFTER- fidently Connected Moms” discussion factor. Overall, women are twice as s % M A I L A MOM YOUD LIKE TO KNOW cheer you. NOON PLAY DATE AND POTLUCK DINNER group on Facebook. May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 13 Take note How to tell BY LEILA VISS ot every person is destined when your to be a concert musician, N but everyone can be a music maker, enthusiast, and supporter. child is ready Giving your child the gift of learning music on any instrument is some- for music thing to treasure, but finding the answers on how to provide this gift is not always easy. lessons You may be unaware of your youngster’s readiness for making music, but there are some signs that should help you make that as- sessment. Here are some steps toward un- locking your child’s innate musical- ity and readiness. How can I tell when my child is ready? Encourage exploration s 0 U R C H A S E A KEYBOARD INSTRU- ment (a portable digital keyboard to explore. It won’t take long for a are developed before enrolling in may do the trick, but plan to up- youngster to be drawn into these lessons. grade when lessons begin) and let magical games that also teach An ideal candidate for instru- your child explore sound before music fundamentals. mental lessons can: enrolling in lessons. s ) F THE KEYBOARD AND FAVORITE s 3 AY AND SING THE ALPHABET s / N C E THIS EXPLORATION BEGINS apps receive regular visitation, this s # O U N T AT LEAST TO notice how your potential musician is strong evidence that your future s - A TC H PITCH AND SING SONGS gravitates and experiments at the maestro is ready to engage in les- with ease. keys. sons. s ) D E N T I F Y THE LEFT FROM THE RIGHT s $ OW N L O A D SOME MUSIC GAME Prime the potential hand. APPS SUCH AS 0IANO $UST "USTER Some basic skills are involved in s # U T WITH SCISSORS The Most Addicting Sheep Game or learning any instrument, and it’s s # O L O R AND DRAW WITH MARKERS -AGIC 0IANO AND INVITE YOUR CHILD important that these fundamentals pencils, etc. 14 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 s $ A N C E AND MOVE FREELY TO SPEAKING MUSIC s 4EACHERS USUALLY USE A s #LAP AND MARCH WITH A STEADY METHOD BOOK OR SERIES TO TEACH BEAT AN INSTRUMENT ! GOOD QUESTION #ONSIDER EARLY MUSIC EDUCA- TO ASK DURING YOUR CHAT WITH A TION GROUPS WHICH ARE PERFECT FOR TEACHER IS h7HAT METHODS AND YOUNG LEARNERS TOOLS WILL YOU USE TO HELP MY CHILD PROGRESS IN HISHER MUSIC SKILLS v How do I know what instrument is right How do I balance being for my child? a supportive parent 4HE PIANO IS THE EASIEST IN- without becoming STRUMENT TO BEGIN EXPLORING AND overbearing? Digital EVENTUALLY MAKING MUSIC 4HERE- (ERE ARE A COUPLE OF TIPS TO FORE ENROLLING HELP YOU MAIN- YOUR CHILD IN PIANO TAIN A HEALTHY AT- LESSONS MAY BE A TITUDE PLACE TO BEGIN HER It’s important for 3 O M E TEACH- MUSIC EDUCATION you to determine ERS MAY REQUIRE /NCE YOUR BUD- YOU TO BE PRESENT DING MUSICIAN what your priorities AT LESSONS TO TAKE IS INTRODUCED TO NOTES SO CONSIDER CAMP OTHER INSTRUMENTS are for your child’s THIS AS A FREE LES- IN SCHOOL AROUND SON FOR YOURSELF FOURTH OR FIFTH music education. AND LEARN RIGHT GRADE A SHIFT IN IN- ALONG WITH YOUR TEREST MAY OCCUR CHILD 9OU WILL RE- ALIZE THAT BUILDING MUSICAL SKILLS How do I choose the IS A LONG TERM PROCESS WITH PEAKS right teacher? VALLEYS AND PLATEAUS 2EFERRALS FROM FRIENDS AND AC- 2EGARDLESS OF WHETHER YOU GUIDE QUAINTANCES ARE YOUR BEST BET FOR ATTEND LESSONS OR NOT IT IS IMPOR- A GOOD TEACHER )F THEY ARE HAPPY TANT FOR YOU TO REMEMBER THAT WITH A TEACHER THERES A GOOD THIS IS YOUR CHILDS ENDEAVOR AND CHANCE THAT YOU WILL BE AS WELL NOT YOURSLLOW ! YOUR BUDDING !LSO ASK TO ARRANGE AN INTERVIEW MUSICIAN TO WITH SEVERAL TEACHERS AND YOULL s ,EARN HOW TO LEARN 2014 DISCOVER THAT EACH OWNS A UNIQUE s 2EAD ALL ASSIGNMENTS STUDIO )TS IMPORTANT FOR YOU TO s 4A KE CHARGE AND ASK THE DETERMINE WHAT YOUR PRIORITIES TEACHER QUESTIONS THEMSELVES ARE FOR YOUR CHILDS MUSIC EDU- WHEN THEY FORGET A CONCEPT CATION (ERE ARE SOME THINGS TO s " E RESPONSIBLE FOR COLLECTING CONSIDER BOOKS PRIOR TO THE LESSON ETC s 3 O M E TEACHERS MAY EXCEL AT 4HE BEST SUPPORT YOU CAN PREPARING STUDENTS TO COMPETE OFFER YOUR CHILD IS PROVIDING A WHILE OTHERS MAY LEAN TOWARD STRUCTURE A MORE RELAXED APPROACH WITH s - A KE DAILY PRACTICING A PRIOR- FEWER OPPORTUNITIES TO COMPETE ITY SO IT BECOMES A HABIT BY SET- OR PERFORM FORMALLY TING UP A SCHEDULE s 3 O M E MAY REMAIN SET IN A TRA- s ) N S TE A D OF SETTING THE TIMER DITIONAL APPROACH WITH STANDARD AND DEMANDING PRACTICE ENSURE REPERTOIRE AND OTHERS MAY EM- THAT THE TEACHERS INSTRUCTIONS PHASIZE LESSONS IN CREATIVITY BE- ARE UNDERSTOOD AND COMPLETED YOND THE NDPAGE A VARIOUS STYLES DURING PRACTICE TIME BY REVIEWING OTHER THAN CLASSICAL THE ASSIGNMENT WITH YOUR MUSI- s ' R O U P LESSONS ARE A POPULAR CIAN 4HE AMOUNT OF DAILY TIME SOCIAL SETTING WHICH MAY BEST SUIT AT THE INSTRUMENT MAY VARY AS THOSE WHO ARE STILL ON THE FENCE CONSISTENT PRACTICE WILL MAKE THE ABOUT STUDYING AN INSTRUMENT ASSIGNMENT EASIER TO PLAY BY THE 0RIVATE LESSONS USUALLY ACCOMMO- END OF THE WEEK DATE SCHEDULES MORE EASILY AND s ! R R I V E PROMPTLY FOR EACH LES- OFFER ONE ON ONE INSTRUCTION SON AND BE ON TIME FOR PICK UP s - U S I C SHOULD BE SHARED SO s 3 H OW TEACHERS THE RESPECT Check it out on ASK IF THE TEACHER OFFERS ENCOUR- THEY DESERVE BY FOLLOWING ALL STU- AGEMENT AND OPPORTUNITIES TO DIO POLICIES AND SUBMITTING TIMELY PERFORM EVEN CASUALLY !LTHOUGH PAYMENTS nyparenting.com DIFFICULT PERFORMING INSTILLS DIS- -USIC LESSONS ARE A WORTHY IN- CIPLINE MOTIVATION CONFIDENCE VESTMENT TOWARD A GIFT THAT LASTS A AND GOOD EXPERIENCE FOR PUBLIC LIFETIME (APPY MUSIC MAKING May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 15 process, not productivity. Unstructured time does not mean boring or unentertaining time. Do make it fun — the process of creat- ing should be joyful, not necessarily the end product. O’Connor says to choose toys promoting creative play, such as LEGO bricks and blocks. These are superior choices to toys that only do one thing. If kids know where to find materi- als for creating, they will use them. Have an organized storage system, and teach them how to properly take care of art items. Soule recommends buying quality art supplies such as a few good quality crayons over a box full of hundreds of mediocre ones. “It’s much more satisfying to work on something when the materials you are using actually ‘work’ and assist in what you are doing, rather than hinder and slow you down.” Make basic instruments available at home (hand drums, whistles, mara- cas, harmonicas, recorders, triangles, shakers) so as Soule writes, “They’ll naturally discover and play with them Three ways to nurture as they do with their toys.” s ( E A D INTO THE KITCHEN There are so many opportunities for cre- ative cooking beyond Tollhouse cook- ies. Soule recommends “Fairy Tale Feasts” by Jane Yolen (2009), featur- ing 20 stories, each with at least one recipe (the recipe for “Very French Toast” accompanies the French folk- tale “Diamonds and Toads”). Another creativity fun option is Georgeanne Brennan’s “Green Eggs and Ham Cookbook” BY MICHELE RANARD nurturing creativity and connecting (2006) filled with silly recipes for Cat Ignite their with your child: in the Hat pudding and Moose Juice. “Creativity is a lot like looking at s - O D E L A CREATIVE LIFE Nurtur- (You’ve got to love that the pages of imaginations the world through a kaleidoscope. You ing your own creative spirit will not this cookbook are laminated!) look at a set of elements, the same only improve the quality of your own Creativity’s pay-off is huge. If im- ones everyone else sees, but then life, but according to Soule, “It will proved academic achievement and with these reassemble those floating bits and also serve as a guide and model to deeper connection were not reward pieces into an enticing new possibil- your children on finding their cre- enough, all of these nurturing expe- it y.” — Rosabeth Moss Kanter ative selves.” Many avenues exist to riences are pure fun! helpful tips explore your artistic side, but a good Michele Ranard has a husband, two he ability to see “floating bits start is an excellent read. Soule rec- sons, and a master’s degree in counsel- and pieces” comes more natu- ommends “The Starving Artist’s Way” ing. She is a creative dynamo who blogs T rally for some than others, yet (2004) by Nava Lubelski, which offers as a hobby at hellolovelystudio.com. parents play a vital role in enhancing 100 “far-out, appealing, and interest- 2ESOURCES their child’s ability to do so. ing” suggestions. For instance, have Brennan, Georgeanne and Dr. Seuss. “Green Nurturing creativity may not only you ever made felt from cat hair? Eggs and Ham Cookbook.” Random House improve your child’s achievement s 0RIORITIZE UNSTRUCTURED TIME Books for Young Readers. 2006. in academics, but as author of “The Watching television rarely helps the Lubelski, Nava. “The Starving Artist’s Way: Creative Family” Amanda Blake Soule imagination to bloom. Blogger Tracy Easy Projects for Low-Budget Living.” New explains, it creates deeper connec- O’Connor warns, “Television not only York: Three Rivers Press, 2004. tion with family members. encourages children and adults to be O’Connor, Tracy. Moneyning. http://moneyn- “You’ll make meaningful connec- passive consumers of entertainment, ing.com/kids-and-money/10-low-and-no-cost- tions with your children in large and but it can also promote materialism ways-to-nurture-your-childs-creativity/ small ways; your children will more and obesity.” Conversely, unstruc- Soule, Amanda Blake. “The Creative Family: How to Encourage Imagination and Nurture often engage in their own creative tured time allows children to engage. Family Connections.” Trumpeter, 2008. discoveries; and your family will em- Dr. Markham says, “Kids need prac- Yolen, Jane, Heidi E. Y. Stemple, and Philippe brace new ways to relax, play, and tice with unstructured time, or they Beha. “Fairy Tale Feasts: A Literary Cookbook grow together.” will never learn to manage it.” She for Young Eaters and Readers.” Interlink Pub Consider these three ideas for suggests parents focus on play and Group Inc., 2009. 16 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 Arts DA NCE SUMMER DAY CA MP DIRECTORY GREAT Belle School of music RATES! 1088 central park Avenue, Scarsdale 10583 283 Tarrytown Rd, White Plains 10607 $200 1537 Central Park Ave, Yonkers 10710 Program Begins PER WEEK 914- 961-5511 or www.belleschool.com June 30, 2014 The Belle School of Music, ‘where learning is fun!’ has a unique, effec- 7am–5:30pm tive and enjoyable way of learning for children (18 months and up) and Ages 6–13 yrs For Further Information adults. Under the supervision of highly qualified and dedicated staff, the Call 917-299-6052 child you love will learn to play, and develop an appreciation and love for (option for later stay available) www.tamicodancing.com music that will last a lifetime. Bring out the musical talent in your child! To schedule a FREE introductory lesson and consultation please call. Bronx House School for Performing Arts BRONX HOUSE Musical Theater Summer Program 990 Pelham Parkway South 718-792-1800 ext. 235 or www.bronxhouse.org School for Performing Arts This new program is for kids who love to sing, dance, or perform! Included are 4 hours a day of instruction in singing, dancing and acting, and classes in theater games and improv. Instructors are trained profes- Music and Dance Instruction for All Ages sionals who are also accomplished educators. Two three-week sessions Professional Faculty culminate in musical theater productions for family and friends. Also Music & Dance Recitals included is a trip to a Broadway or off-Broadway production and swim in State-of-the-Art Facilities the indoor pool. The program is open to any child with an interest in the performing arts who is entering 3rd to 8th grade in September 2014. All Free Loaner Instruments skill levels are welcome, no previous experience is necessary, however a Year Round Programming passion for the arts is required. Parents must provide daily lunch. Competitive Pricing & Financial Assistance Tamico Dancing Group Music and Dance Summer Classes 80 W. Kingsbridge Road 2nd Flr. Bronx 10468 917-299-6052 or www.tamicodancing.com Begin June 28 Artistic Director Tamiko Maldonado founded TamiCo. Dancing Inc. in Ongoing Registration for 2009 as a means for young dancers to not only thrive mentally but also hone in on their artistic abilities. Ultimately, building life-learning skills. Private Instruction TamiCo. Dancing prides itself on the fact that demographically, there is no Dance School offering similar qualities. The intention of the company is Register Now! to teach young artists to genuinely respect and love the art of dance. This 990 Pelham Parkway South Bronx, NY 10461 rewards personal fulfillment, but more importantly positivity and a lasting 718-792-1800 ext. 235 effect on the lives. Enabling students to live this type of thought process through Dance encourages limitless expression. www.bronxhouse.org TamiCo. Dancing. Teaching expression through Dance. BROOKLYN QUEENS BRONX STATEN ISLAND MANHATTAN Family Family Family Family Family NYParenting.comOnlineFREE at C hdl i re ns ’ FREE Q U E E N S FREE STATEN I Dental Health SLAND A nEight n i v Year e r s a r y High Schools y l maF i y l maF i Guide to ADVERTISE FREE www.webfamilyny.com FREE MANHATTAN BROOKLYN BRONX/RIVERDALE Talkin’ T e e n s F a m yl i F a m y l i F a m y l i Where Every Child Matters Safer Doubling up! surfing B a c k -to - Managing the cost of multiples F o r t o d a y ’ s i T e e n s school Mastering act ivit ie s Facebook S m a r t e r s o c i a l n e t w o r k i n g H e a l t h i e r Perfect match food for P i c k y o u r s u m m e r p r o g r a m n o w ! Big smiles T h e o r t h o c h e c k l i s t city kids W h e r e t o g o i n M a r c h ? C h e c k o u t o u r Right bites! W h e r e t o g o i n O c t o b e r ? C h e c k o u t o u r Going Places Eat your way to better health Obesity, Going Places children and Check out our cholesterol G o i n g P l a c e s G o i n g P l a c e s Where to go in February? Check out our WHERE TO GO IN JULY? WITH US! Check out our calendar, online and inside TO PLACE AN AD IN OUR LINE OF FAMILY PUBLICATIONS, PLEASE CALL 718.260.4554 Special Advertising Section May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE FAmILy 17 PARENTING 365 days of happy Moms owe themselves the love they give or years on Mother’s Day, It is sweet, and any of us who are tyr is the very opposite of who we many of us have enjoyed being lucky enough to enjoy such appre- want to model to our children, and F lavished with cards, gifts, and ciation should feel cherished and after a while we can’t help but feel love from our family to show their respected. Wouldn’t it be nice if we overburdened and exhausted, and gratitude to us for all we do, day in did that for ourselves — everyday? then no one is happy — not us, our JUST WRITE and day out, all year long. It is a fact that for many women, spouse, or our kids. myself included, becoming a It might be difficult, hell, it IS dif- MOM mother became synonymous with ficult. I am in the process of doing DANIELLE SULLIVAN becoming a caretaker, an unelected this right now. But I know it CAN fixer of all things, and a selfless be done because, like you, I know being. Many times it is a many women who never relinquish self-imposed sentence their vitality to the role of mother. placed on us by societal They deliver a baby and still keep demands because what is a up with friends, museum exhibi- good mother other than al- tions, parties, and hobbies that ways there for her family? And make them feel good. They delegate don’t get me wrong, I firmly be- and don’t put it upon themselves lieve that we need to attend to our to have to do everything. They children’s needs and recognize take turns with childcare with their them for the complicated indi- spouse and friends. In other words, viduals they are, but some- they treat themselves with regular where along the way (and doses of T.L.C., and that is just as preferably as soon as we vital as nutrition and vitamins for get home from the hos- good mental and physical health. pital), we need to keep I am not saying it is easy, but if ourselves in the mix. I were to mentally tack up my fe- When was the male friends, the majority of them last time you spent put themselves last behind their a whole day spouse, children, and even rela- doing exactly tives and friends. We need to ask what you liked ourselves if that is what we want doing? Or had our own daughters to do because a beauty night what they live, they will duplicate. the way you It is that age-old airplane analogy: used to when put your own oxygen mask on first you were single, so you can save your kids; but in this or simply curled case we need to put our own happi- up with a good ness first so we can foster enough of book or movie? it to share with those in our life that When was the last mean the most. So, while you are time you delegated enjoying that half-cooked breakfast one of your end- in bed and scribbled crayon cards, less responsibilities and after you thank those special to your spouse or people, try to take a minute to thank kids? When was the yourself for doing a fabulous job — last time you said right after you promise to treat your- “no” to a friend? self with all the compassion and Too many of us love you heap upon those gorgeous have become so little people that made you a mother absorbed in build- in the first place! ing a family that Danielle Sullivan, a mom of three, we have forgot- has worked as a writer and editor in the ten we owe it parenting world for more than 10 years. to ourselves to Sullivan also writes about pets and par- build a happy enting for Disney’s Babble.com. Find Sul- person from the livan on her blogs, Just Write Mom and inside out. A mar- Some Puppy To Love. 18 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 PARENTING ST. ANSELM SCHOOL Special Incentive SCHOLARSHIP (Grades 3rd & 4th) Celebrating Excellence in Education since 1908 365 days of happy T *OZN'M@@ Moms owe themselves the love they give 6IDQ@MN May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 19 PARENTING RELATIONSHIPSRELATIONSHIPS Teens and dating UnsettlingUnsettling mistakesmistakes Dear Dr. Karyn, him?” I’ve coached teens for nearly chology of music for youth, and even I have a 19-year-old son who is at- 20 years and when I see this pat- adults for that matter. We all choose HowHow misunderstandings misunderstandings can can stall stall a a divorce divorce tending university. He has decided to tern, there is often a common theme, music because we are drawn to it go back out with an old girlfriend who which comes back to self-esteem. for one reason or another. When I hehe Hacketts Hacketts were were divorced: divorced: on on is not good for him and doesn’t treat There are three different kinds of coach youth, one of the first ques- JanuaryJanuary 12, 12, 2006, 2006, the the parties parties him well. Is there anything I can do? self-esteem. There is low self-esteem, tions I ask them is, “What kind of TTsettledsettled their their divorce divorce action action or people who put themselves down, music do you listen to?” What youth andand executed executed a a written written settlement settlement Dear parent, which I call the “blind.” There is choose to listen to speaks volumes DIVORCE & agreement.agreement. DEAR The simple answer: there is noth- false self-esteem, or people who put of who they are. After all, music is an DIVORCE & ThenThen why, why, eight eight years years later, later, in in ing direct you can do. Since your son others down, which I call the “dis- expression of personal taste and val- SEPARATIONSEPARATION March,March, 2014, 2014, was was another another court court is - is- DR. KARYN is 19, you obviously cannot control guised.” And there is healthy self- ues. Therefore, putting down your suingsuing a decisiona decision and and order order related related to to DR. KARYN GORDON who he chooses to date. But you esteem, or people who treat them- son’s music is often misinterpreted LEELEE CHABIN, CHABIN, E SQ.ESQ. thethe 2006 2006 divorce divorce settlement? settlement? can be an incredible support for selves and others with respect, who as a personal attack. InIn January, January, 2008, 2008, Mr. Mr. Hackett Hackett him, which is very powerful. The I call the “lifers.” The worst thing you could do is broughtbrought an an action action “seeking “seeking to to re re- - interesting thing about dating is that The fascinating aspect of self-es- put down your son’s music, or say formform the the settlement settlement agreement agreement on on we choose who we want to date. So, teem is this attitude that we have of it’s disgusting because, chances are, thethe ground ground that that an an alleged alleged mutual mutual when I coach teens through their re- ourselves radically impacts every your son interpreted that comment mistakemistake had had resulted resulted in in the the unequal unequal lationships, I get very curious about decision we make, including the kind as you saying he was disgusting. Very divisiondivision of of the the marital marital assets.” assets.” what it is about their partner that of person we choose to date. Often, few youth can differentiate between “Mutual“Mutual mistake” mistake” refers refers to to a amis mis- - they are attracted to. the blind are attracted to the blind who they are and what choices they understandingunderstanding involving involving every every party party What does it say about your son or disguised while the lifers are often make. I’m not saying parents should (in(in this this case, case, the the spouses) spouses) in in a acon con- - that he is drawn to a girl who does not attracted to the lifers. When parents be silent on this issue. But how par- tracttract (here, (here, the the divorce divorce settlement). settlement). treat him well or who is not “good for don’t like who their son or daughter ents raise this topic is equally, if not Mr.Mr. Hackett’s Hackett’s argument argument to to the the is dating, it is often because the part- more important, than what they say. courtcourt was was that that the the 2006 2006 agreement agreement ner is the disguised or blind. My second suggestion is to use betweenbetween him him and and his his former former wife wife The real issue is that your son your son’s music as a tool to open containedcontained a a “computational “computational error.” error.” may be struggling with a self-esteem up dialogue with him. What kind WhereasWhereas the the parties parties had had intended intended issue, and until this is addressed, my of music he listens to reflects a lot thatthat each each receive receive an an equal equal share share of of concern is that he will continue to about where he is at emotionally. thethe property, property, the the former former Mrs. Mrs. Hack Hack- - tiontion of of the the marital marital estate.” estate.” yeryer and and says, says, “Tell “Tell me me what what will will choose partners that don’t treat him Many youth I’ve coached listen to ettett ended ended up up with with a awindfall windfall “in “in ex ex- - OurOur judicial judicial system system likes likes finality, finality, happenhappen in in my my case.” case.” But But the the law law is is well or who are not good for him. My angry-sounding music, because they cesscess of of $100,000.” $100,000.” butbut doesn’t doesn’t always always provide provide it. it. It Itis isa a muchmuch too too nuanced nuanced for for this. this. Litiga Litiga- - number one encouragement for you can relate to it; they also feel a lot InIn the the end, end, the the Appellate Appellate Division Division toughtough road road to to prove prove that that there there was was torstors spend spend their their professional professional lives lives is to be a safe place for him to talk. of anger inside of them. So learn to ofof the the Second Second Judicial Judicial Department Department a a mutual mutual mistake mistake and and to to set set aside aside arguingarguing about about how how the the law law should should Share with him your concerns and ask the right questions. Really seek rejectedrejected Mr. Mr. Hackett’s Hackett’s claim. claim. a a settlement settlement agreement, agreement, but but that that bebe applied applied in in one one case case after after another. another. ask him what you can do to be help- to understand where your son is OneOne factor factor that that the the court court appar appar- - doesn’tdoesn’t mean mean that that someone someone won’t won’t ManyMany would would happily happily argue argue either either ful for him through this time. If he is coming from. Ask questions such as: entlyently relied relied on on was was that, that, “The “The parties parties trytry to to get get there. there. sideside of of a matter,a matter, and and there there is isnothing nothing open, ask him if he would like to see What is it you like about this music? acknowledgedacknowledged in in open open court court that that TheThe Hackett Hackett case case is is evidence evidence of of unethicalunethical about about this. this. a counselor to help him sort through What does it mean to you? Why are theythey had had read read and and understood understood the the this.this. TheThe point point is isthat that even even judges judges can can his relationship. Relationships are you drawn to it? termsterms of of the the settlement settlement agreement, agreement, andand do do disagree disagree with with one one another another at at tough and the more help, wisdom, Third, talk about the issue of re- andand had had not not been been forced” forced” to to sign sign it. it. OtherOther mistakes: mistakes: times.times. How How then, then, can can you you as as a a (po (po- - and support we can get, the better! spect as it relates to his music, spe- TheThe court court cited cited earlier earlier case case law law HowHow long long will will it ittake? take? tential)tential) litigant, litigant, be be so so certain certain of of the the cifically content and volume. Obvi- statingstating that that “marital “marital settlement settlement TheThe Hacketts Hacketts had had already already settled settled outcome?outcome? Certain Certain that that a a judge judge will will Youth and the ously, if there is content that puts agreementsagreements are are judicially judicially favored favored backback in in 2006. 2006. They They may may have have litigated litigated agreeagree with with you? you? psychology of music down other people, I would encour- andand are are not not to to be be easily easily set set aside,” aside,” beforebefore then. then. Did Did the the wife, wife, or or even even the the EvenEven if ifthe the judge judge does does rule rule in in your your Dear Dr. Karyn, age you to not let it be played in andand that that the the mutual mutual mistake mistake must must be be husband,husband, imagine imagine at at that that time time that that favor,favor, might might the the other other party party return return I can’t stand the music my son the home. As it relates to volume, “so“so material material that that it itgoes goes to to the the foun foun- - theirtheir settlement settlement would would be be challenged, challenged, toto court? court? Might Might an an appellate appellate (“higher (“higher is listening to — it all sounds so discuss with your child what is a dationdation of of the the agreement.” agreement.” leadingleading to to more more years years of of litigation? litigation? court”)court”) judge judge decide decide against against you? you? angry. Is this just a phase? How can respectful volume he can play in his Additionally,Additionally, the the court court said said that that ManyMany parties parties hire hire litigators litigators and and TheThe only only certainty certainty is isthat that it itwill will take take I put restrictions on my son’s music room, so it doesn’t bother others. “to“to overcome overcome the the heavy heavy presump presump- - thenthen are are shocked, shocked, even even after after hearing hearing yearsyears to to find find out. out. without being too controlling? Out The key is to discuss this with him. tiontion that that a deliberatelya deliberately prepared prepared and and thethe horror horror stories, stories, to to find find that that they they NewNew York York City City and and Long Long Island-based Island-based of frustration, last week, I told him Dr. Karyn Gordon is one of North executedexecuted written written instrument instrument mani mani- - themselvesthemselves are are spending spending years years of of divorcedivorce mediator mediator and and collaborative collaborative di - di- to turn down his music, because it’s America’s leading relationship and par- festedfested the the true true intention intention of of the the par par- - theirtheir lives lives in in a legala legal battle. battle. vorcevorce lawyer lawyer Lee Lee Chabin Chabin helps helps clients clients disgusting. As you might suspect, he enting experts. She is a regular contribu- ties,ties, evidence evidence of of a verya very high high order order is is TheThe law law is isclear, clear, I amI am right, right, and and endend their their relationships relationships respectfully respectfully and and got extremely angry. I’m confused tor to “Good Morning America,” founder required.”required.” thethe judge judge will will find find in in my my favor. favor. withoutwithout going going to to court. court. Contact Contact him him at at with what my role as a parent should of dk Leadership, best-selling author of Here,Here, Mr. Mr. Hackett Hackett “failed “failed to to meet meet Basically,Basically, whenever whenever a acase case is is“re “re- - [email protected],[email protected], (718) (718) 229– 229– be in this. “Dr. Karyn’s Guide To The Teen Years” hishis high high burden burden of of proof proof of of demon demon- - versed,”versed,” it it means means that that a a judge judge (or (or 6149,6149, or or go go to to http://lc-mediate.com/. http://lc-mediate.com/. (Harper Collins), and motivational stratingstrating that, that, as as a aresult result of of a amutual mutual panelpanel of of judges) judges) disagrees disagrees with with what what FollowFollow him him on on Facebook Facebook at at www.face www.face- - Dear parent, speaker to a quarter of a million people. mistake,mistake, the the settlement settlement agreement agreement anotheranother judge judge decided decided earlier earlier about about book.com/lchabin.book.com/lchabin. I’ve got a few suggestions. First, Visit her at www.dkleadership.org and diddid not not reflect reflect the the true true intent intent of of both both thethe same same case. case. Disclaimer:Disclaimer: All Allmaterial material in thisin this column column is foris forinformational informational it’s important to understand the psy- on Twitter: @DrKarynGordon. partiesparties with with respect respect to to the the distribu distribu- - Often,Often, a a client client meets meets with with a a law law- - purposespurposes only only and and does does not not constitute constitute legal legal advice. advice. 20 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 PARENTING RELATIONSHIPSRELATIONSHIPS Teens and dating UnsettlingUnsettling mistakesmistakes Dear Dr. Karyn, him?” I’ve coached teens for nearly chology of music for youth, and even I have a 19-year-old son who is at- 20 years and when I see this pat- adults for that matter. We all choose HowHow misunderstandings misunderstandings can can stall stall a a divorce divorce tending university. He has decided to tern, there is often a common theme, music because we are drawn to it go back out with an old girlfriend who which comes back to self-esteem. for one reason or another. When I hehe Hacketts Hacketts were were divorced: divorced: on on is not good for him and doesn’t treat There are three different kinds of coach youth, one of the first ques- JanuaryJanuary 12, 12, 2006, 2006, the the parties parties him well. Is there anything I can do? self-esteem. There is low self-esteem, tions I ask them is, “What kind of TTsettledsettled their their divorce divorce action action or people who put themselves down, music do you listen to?” What youth andand executed executed a a written written settlement settlement Dear parent, which I call the “blind.” There is choose to listen to speaks volumes DIVORCE & agreement.agreement. DEAR The simple answer: there is noth- false self-esteem, or people who put of who they are. After all, music is an DIVORCE & ThenThen why, why, eight eight years years later, later, in in ing direct you can do. Since your son others down, which I call the “dis- expression of personal taste and val- SEPARATIONSEPARATION March,March, 2014, 2014, was was another another court court is - is- DR. KARYN is 19, you obviously cannot control guised.” And there is healthy self- ues. Therefore, putting down your suingsuing a decisiona decision and and order order related related to to DR. KARYN GORDON who he chooses to date. But you esteem, or people who treat them- son’s music is often misinterpreted LEELEE CHABIN, CHABIN, E SQ.ESQ. thethe 2006 2006 divorce divorce settlement? settlement? can be an incredible support for selves and others with respect, who as a personal attack. InIn January, January, 2008, 2008, Mr. Mr. Hackett Hackett him, which is very powerful. The I call the “lifers.” The worst thing you could do is broughtbrought an an action action “seeking “seeking to to re re- - interesting thing about dating is that The fascinating aspect of self-es- put down your son’s music, or say formform the the settlement settlement agreement agreement on on we choose who we want to date. So, teem is this attitude that we have of it’s disgusting because, chances are, thethe ground ground that that an an alleged alleged mutual mutual when I coach teens through their re- ourselves radically impacts every your son interpreted that comment mistakemistake had had resulted resulted in in the the unequal unequal lationships, I get very curious about decision we make, including the kind as you saying he was disgusting. Very divisiondivision of of the the marital marital assets.” assets.” what it is about their partner that of person we choose to date. Often, few youth can differentiate between “Mutual“Mutual mistake” mistake” refers refers to to a amis mis- - they are attracted to. the blind are attracted to the blind who they are and what choices they understandingunderstanding involving involving every every party party What does it say about your son or disguised while the lifers are often make. I’m not saying parents should (in(in this this case, case, the the spouses) spouses) in in a acon con- - that he is drawn to a girl who does not attracted to the lifers. When parents be silent on this issue. But how par- tracttract (here, (here, the the divorce divorce settlement). settlement). treat him well or who is not “good for don’t like who their son or daughter ents raise this topic is equally, if not Mr.Mr. Hackett’s Hackett’s argument argument to to the the is dating, it is often because the part- more important, than what they say. courtcourt was was that that the the 2006 2006 agreement agreement ner is the disguised or blind. My second suggestion is to use betweenbetween him him and and his his former former wife wife The real issue is that your son your son’s music as a tool to open containedcontained a a “computational “computational error.” error.” may be struggling with a self-esteem up dialogue with him. What kind WhereasWhereas the the parties parties had had intended intended issue, and until this is addressed, my of music he listens to reflects a lot thatthat each each receive receive an an equal equal share share of of concern is that he will continue to about where he is at emotionally. thethe property, property, the the former former Mrs. Mrs. Hack Hack- - tiontion of of the the marital marital estate.” estate.” yeryer and and says, says, “Tell “Tell me me what what will will choose partners that don’t treat him Many youth I’ve coached listen to ettett ended ended up up with with a awindfall windfall “in “in ex ex- - OurOur judicial judicial system system likes likes finality, finality, happenhappen in in my my case.” case.” But But the the law law is is well or who are not good for him. My angry-sounding music, because they cesscess of of $100,000.” $100,000.” butbut doesn’t doesn’t always always provide provide it. it. It Itis isa a muchmuch too too nuanced nuanced for for this. this. Litiga Litiga- - number one encouragement for you can relate to it; they also feel a lot InIn the the end, end, the the Appellate Appellate Division Division toughtough road road to to prove prove that that there there was was torstors spend spend their their professional professional lives lives is to be a safe place for him to talk. of anger inside of them. So learn to ofof the the Second Second Judicial Judicial Department Department a a mutual mutual mistake mistake and and to to set set aside aside arguingarguing about about how how the the law law should should Share with him your concerns and ask the right questions. Really seek rejectedrejected Mr. Mr. Hackett’s Hackett’s claim. claim. a a settlement settlement agreement, agreement, but but that that bebe applied applied in in one one case case after after another. another. ask him what you can do to be help- to understand where your son is OneOne factor factor that that the the court court appar appar- - doesn’tdoesn’t mean mean that that someone someone won’t won’t ManyMany would would happily happily argue argue either either ful for him through this time. If he is coming from. Ask questions such as: entlyently relied relied on on was was that, that, “The “The parties parties trytry to to get get there. there. sideside of of a matter,a matter, and and there there is isnothing nothing open, ask him if he would like to see What is it you like about this music? acknowledgedacknowledged in in open open court court that that TheThe Hackett Hackett case case is is evidence evidence of of unethicalunethical about about this. this. a counselor to help him sort through What does it mean to you? Why are theythey had had read read and and understood understood the the this.this. TheThe point point is isthat that even even judges judges can can his relationship. Relationships are you drawn to it? termsterms of of the the settlement settlement agreement, agreement, andand do do disagree disagree with with one one another another at at tough and the more help, wisdom, Third, talk about the issue of re- andand had had not not been been forced” forced” to to sign sign it. it. OtherOther mistakes: mistakes: times.times. How How then, then, can can you you as as a a (po (po- - and support we can get, the better! spect as it relates to his music, spe- TheThe court court cited cited earlier earlier case case law law HowHow long long will will it ittake? take? tential)tential) litigant, litigant, be be so so certain certain of of the the cifically content and volume. Obvi- statingstating that that “marital “marital settlement settlement TheThe Hacketts Hacketts had had already already settled settled outcome?outcome? Certain Certain that that a a judge judge will will Youth and the ously, if there is content that puts agreementsagreements are are judicially judicially favored favored backback in in 2006. 2006. They They may may have have litigated litigated agreeagree with with you? you? psychology of music down other people, I would encour- andand are are not not to to be be easily easily set set aside,” aside,” beforebefore then. then. Did Did the the wife, wife, or or even even the the EvenEven if ifthe the judge judge does does rule rule in in your your Dear Dr. Karyn, age you to not let it be played in andand that that the the mutual mutual mistake mistake must must be be husband,husband, imagine imagine at at that that time time that that favor,favor, might might the the other other party party return return I can’t stand the music my son the home. As it relates to volume, “so“so material material that that it itgoes goes to to the the foun foun- - theirtheir settlement settlement would would be be challenged, challenged, toto court? court? Might Might an an appellate appellate (“higher (“higher is listening to — it all sounds so discuss with your child what is a dationdation of of the the agreement.” agreement.” leadingleading to to more more years years of of litigation? litigation? court”)court”) judge judge decide decide against against you? you? angry. Is this just a phase? How can respectful volume he can play in his Additionally,Additionally, the the court court said said that that ManyMany parties parties hire hire litigators litigators and and TheThe only only certainty certainty is isthat that it itwill will take take I put restrictions on my son’s music room, so it doesn’t bother others. “to“to overcome overcome the the heavy heavy presump presump- - thenthen are are shocked, shocked, even even after after hearing hearing yearsyears to to find find out. out. without being too controlling? Out The key is to discuss this with him. tiontion that that a deliberatelya deliberately prepared prepared and and thethe horror horror stories, stories, to to find find that that they they NewNew York York City City and and Long Long Island-based Island-based of frustration, last week, I told him Dr. Karyn Gordon is one of North executedexecuted written written instrument instrument mani mani- - themselvesthemselves are are spending spending years years of of divorcedivorce mediator mediator and and collaborative collaborative di - di- to turn down his music, because it’s America’s leading relationship and par- festedfested the the true true intention intention of of the the par par- - theirtheir lives lives in in a legala legal battle. battle. vorcevorce lawyer lawyer Lee Lee Chabin Chabin helps helps clients clients disgusting. As you might suspect, he enting experts. She is a regular contribu- ties,ties, evidence evidence of of a verya very high high order order is is TheThe law law is isclear, clear, I amI am right, right, and and endend their their relationships relationships respectfully respectfully and and got extremely angry. I’m confused tor to “Good Morning America,” founder required.”required.” thethe judge judge will will find find in in my my favor. favor. withoutwithout going going to to court. court. Contact Contact him him at at with what my role as a parent should of dk Leadership, best-selling author of Here,Here, Mr. Mr. Hackett Hackett “failed “failed to to meet meet Basically,Basically, whenever whenever a acase case is is“re “re- - [email protected],[email protected], (718) (718) 229– 229– be in this. “Dr. Karyn’s Guide To The Teen Years” hishis high high burden burden of of proof proof of of demon demon- - versed,”versed,” it it means means that that a a judge judge (or (or 6149,6149, or or go go to to http://lc-mediate.com/. http://lc-mediate.com/. (Harper Collins), and motivational stratingstrating that, that, as as a aresult result of of a amutual mutual panelpanel of of judges) judges) disagrees disagrees with with what what FollowFollow him him on on Facebook Facebook at at www.face www.face- - Dear parent, speaker to a quarter of a million people. mistake,mistake, the the settlement settlement agreement agreement anotheranother judge judge decided decided earlier earlier about about book.com/lchabin.book.com/lchabin. I’ve got a few suggestions. First, Visit her at www.dkleadership.org and diddid not not reflect reflect the the true true intent intent of of both both thethe same same case. case. Disclaimer:Disclaimer: All Allmaterial material in thisin this column column is foris forinformational informational it’s important to understand the psy- on Twitter: @DrKarynGordon. partiesparties with with respect respect to to the the distribu distribu- - Often,Often, a a client client meets meets with with a a law law- - purposespurposes only only and and does does not not constitute constitute legal legal advice. advice. May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 21 BOOKS Kentucky Derby from A to Z o you’ve got a couple of horse grass have a bluish tint. lovers around, but they want Those powerful horses need S different things from the books people to care for them, so G is for they read. And that’s why you’ll love Groom, which is the person who giving them “D is for Derby,” by brushes the horse, works with Helen L. Wilbur, illustrated by Jaime him, gives him baths, and makes Corum. sure he’s “happy, healthy, hand- Just two minutes. some, and ready to race.” Of course, tant part of the day: the That’s about how long it takes for no horse can race without a jockey in race. The horses line up, their own- the Kentucky Derby, from opening the saddle, so J is for Jockey. ers hoping for the Triple Crown: P THE BOOK gate to finish. You probably can’t Long before the horses get to is for Preakness, and together with think of a quicker sport, because the opening gate, there’s a great the Derby and the Belmont Stakes, it WORM there probably isn’t one. And in this celebration in Louisville. D is for could mean a big win! TERRI SCHLICHENMEYER book, the very first letter of the Derby Festival, which includes Author Helen L. Wilbur wrote this alphabet stands for the very first boats, parades, fireworks, and con- book to appeal to two age groups on Kentucky Derby winner, Aristides, certs. Everyone’s excited and on the same page: children who enjoy a thoroughbred horse ridden by an race day they gather by the spires. a good picture book and need the African-American jockey. When Aris- The Derby attracts celebrities and basics, and older readers who want tides raced in 1875, most jockeys royalty; even Queen Elizabeth and solid information and a chance to were black, in fact. Prince Philip have attended, which really understand horse racing. Add You might wonder why Kentucky is why Q is for Queen. And wouldn’t in amazingly life-like illustrations by is the “horse capital” of the world. you know that H is for hat because Jaime Corum (my favorite part!) and It’s because the state’s “limestone- wearing wild, colorful hats is a you’ve got something that kids will rich soil” grows grass that gives the Derby tradition for women, just as enjoy and that adults won’t mind horses good bones and strong mus- wearing splashy ties and flashy reading, too. cles: B is for Bluegrass, clothing is tradition for men who “D is for Derby: A Kentucky Derby which is what it’s called attend the festivities. Alphabet,” by Helen L. Wilbur [32 pages, because the buds of the But then comes the most impor- 2014, $16.95]. Big book of vehicles for little drivers Safe in the water ou call your ing the one in this book. He’ll also out of this world, check out the last son your lit- see what happens when recycling page of this book. It’s going to send US SWIM SCHOOL enrolling children in swimming dren to open their eyes under water; Y tle back-seat trucks and garbage trucks pick up him over the moon! Tips to help ASSOCIATION lessons, knowing CPR, and having if they fall in, they can find the side of driver. their big loads. So you say you’ve got a wheel- pool fences and barriers installed. the pool or a step and get out safely. That’s because Or maybe he’s a fan of farms. wild youngster in the house — one prevent rowning is one of the lead- In addition to these vital steps, here s &O R VERY YOUNG CHILDREN PRAC- he likes to sit in the Does he love tractors and combines? who can’t get enough of big ma- ing causes of death in the is a list of tips parents can use to tice having them put their entire back in your car, and Then he’ll like the ones in this book, chines that go? Then you’re going D United States. On average, build extra layers of protection for face under water in the bathtub and keep an eye out for because he’ll see how the insides of to want to go find “The Ultimate drowning 3,533 people die as a result of drown- their children around water from blow bubbles to build their comfort anything he might some machines work. Book of Vehicles From Around the ing each year, and most of those Sue Mackie, executive director of with water. like to drive someday. Does your child and his grandfa- World.” deaths are children under the age of the United States Swim School As- s # R E A TE A WATER SAFETY PLAN FOR Or haul. Or dig. Or float, run, ther share a love of trains? Then he’ll There’s more! May is Water Safety Month 4, who drown in backyard swimming sociation. your family and have water emer- lift, pump, and tow. Anything with want to show grandpa what’s here: On just about every page, there pools. The tragedy of these statistics gency drills with your kids — cov- wheels, that’s what he notices. two big pages of trains complete are tabs to pull and flaps to lift. is that nearly all drowning deaths Drowning prevention ering how to recognize the signs He can’t wait until he grows up. with a chance to peek inside to see Your kids can deliver cargo, roll a are preventable. and water safety tips of someone struggling in water and But, if he has “The Ultimate Book of what they haul. cement mixer, raise a scissor truck, To help educate children, par- s # R E A TE A VERBAL CUE FOR YOUR TOD- what to do in this type of emer- Vehicles From Around the World” by There are even more big trucks dump garbage, make hay, feed their ents, families and swim instructors dler or child that must be given by gency. Anne-Sophie Baumann and Didier inside this book. Your child will neighbors, douse a fire, and captain on preventive measures to avoid a you before he can enter the pool. s - A KE SURE YOUR GUESTS AND KIDS Balicevic by his side, he can pretend see ambulances and fire trucks a ship. drowning incident, US Swim School s .EVER ALLOW YOUR BABY OR TODDLER friends know your pool rules before to drive, dig, or haul right now. and a fire lift so he can help save And what 3-to-5-year-old wouldn’t Association, the preeminent swim in the pool without a swim diaper. they go outside and get in the pool. Let’s say he loves construction someone’s life. He can look inside love all of the above? “The Ulti- school organization in the country, s # R E A TE A PROCESS THE CHILD MUST s 3TART SWIM LESSONS AT MONTHS OF equipment. Big trucks that haul a great big freight ship, a luxury mate Book of Vehicles From Around has compiled the latest life-saving go through before entering a pool, age and continue them year-round. and dump. Gigantic machines that cruise ship, a medium-sized fishing the World,” by Anne-Sophie Baumann water safety and swim instruction such as putting on a swim diaper, a s ! L W AY S MAKE SURE YOUR CHILDREN bust up buildings and dig holes in boat, and a fancy yacht. If he wants and Didier Balicevic [23 pages, 2014, tips for National Water Safety Month swimsuit, and applying sunscreen. wear life jackets on boats, personal the ground. Machines that move to be an airplane pilot someday, $19.99]. in May. s .EVER USE FLOTATION DEVICES OR watercraft, and in open bodies of dirt — that’s what he loves and then he’ll like seeing the inside of Terri Schlichenmeyer has been read- There are several standard water water wings when swimming or water. he’ll find them all on the first pages a jumbo jet, a cargo plane, and a ing since she was 3 years old, and safety precautions recommended when teaching kids to swim. For more information on US Swim of this book. Have he ever seen a glider. Be sure to spin the helicop- she never goes anywhere without a to parents including: keeping chil- s #HILDREN SHOULD LEARN TO SWIM School Association, visit: http://www. scissors lift? If he hasn’t, he’ll get ter propeller! book. She lives on a hill with two dogs dren under constant supervision, without goggles. Teach your chil- usswimschool.org. an idea of what it’s like by mov- And finally, if his need for speed is and 12,000 books. 22 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 BOOKSBOOKS KentuckyKentucky Derby Derby from from A Ato to Z Z o you’veo you’ve got agot couple a couple of horse of horse grass grass have have a bluish a bluish tint. tint. loverslovers around, around, but but they they want want ThoseThose powerful powerful horses horses need need SSdifferentdifferent things things from from the booksthe books people people to care to care for them, for them, so G so is Gfor is for theythey read. read. And And that’s that’s why why you’ll you’ll love love Groom, Groom, which which is the is personthe person who who givinggiving them them “D is“D for is forDerby,” Derby,” by bybrushes brushes the the horse, horse, works works with with HelenHelen L. Wilbur, L. Wilbur, illustrated illustrated by Jaime by Jaime him, him, gives gives him himbaths, baths, and andmakes makes Corum.Corum. suresure he’s he’s “happy, “happy, healthy, healthy, hand- hand- Just Justtwo twominutes. minutes. some,some, and andready ready to race.” to race.” Of course, Of course, tant tant part part of the of the day: day: the the That’sThat’s about about how how long long it takes it takes for forno horseno horse can canrace race without without a jockey a jockey in inrace. race. The Thehorses horses line lineup, theirup, their own- own- the the Kentucky Kentucky Derby, Derby, from from opening opening the saddle,the saddle, so J sois forJ is Jockey. for Jockey. ers ers hoping hoping for thefor the Triple Triple Crown: Crown: P P THETHE BOOK BOOK gategate to finish. to finish. You You probably probably can’t can’t LongLong before before the the horses horses get get to tois foris Preakness, for Preakness, and and together together with with thinkthink of a of quicker a quicker sport, sport, because because the the opening opening gate, gate, there’s there’s a great a great the Derbythe Derby and andthe Belmontthe Belmont Stakes, Stakes, it it WORMWORM therethere probably probably isn’t isn’t one. one. And And in this in thiscelebration celebration in Louisville. in Louisville. D is D for is forcould could mean mean a big a win!big win! TERRITERRI SCHLICHENMEYER SCHLICHENMEYER book,book, the the very very first first letter letter of the of theDerby Derby Festival, Festival, which which includes includes AuthorAuthor Helen Helen L. Wilbur L. Wilbur wrote wrote this this alphabetalphabet stands stands for forthe the very very first firstboats, boats, parades, parades, fireworks, fireworks, and andcon- con-bookbook to appeal to appeal to two to twoage groupsage groups on on KentuckyKentucky Derby Derby winner, winner, Aristides, Aristides, certs. certs. Everyone’s Everyone’s excited excited and and on onthe the same same page: page: children children who who enjoy enjoy a thoroughbreda thoroughbred horse horse ridden ridden by an by anrace race day daythey they gather gather by the by thespires. spires. a gooda good picture picture book book and and need need the the African-AmericanAfrican-American jockey. jockey. When When Aris- Aris-The TheDerby Derby attracts attracts celebrities celebrities and andbasics, basics, and andolder older readers readers who who want want tidestides raced raced in 1875, in 1875, most most jockeys jockeys royalty; royalty; even even Queen Queen Elizabeth Elizabeth and andsolid solid information information and and a chance a chance to to werewere black, black, in fact. in fact. PrincePrince Philip Philip have have attended, attended, which which really really understand understand horse horse racing. racing. Add Add You Youmight might wonder wonder why why Kentucky Kentucky is whyis why Q is Qfor is Queen. for Queen. And And wouldn’t wouldn’t in amazinglyin amazingly life-like life-like illustrations illustrations by by is theis the “horse “horse capital” capital” of the of the world. world. you youknow know that that H is Hfor is hatfor becausehat because Jaime Jaime Corum Corum (my (myfavorite favorite part!) part!) and and It’s becauseIt’s because the the state’s state’s “limestone- “limestone-wearingwearing wild, wild, colorful colorful hats hats is a is ayou’ve you’ve got gotsomething something that that kids kids will will richrich soil” soil” grows grows grass grass that that gives gives the theDerby Derby tradition tradition for women,for women, just justas asenjoy enjoy and and that that adults adults won’t won’t mind mind horseshorses good good bones bones and andstrong strong mus- mus-wearingwearing splashy splashy ties ties and and flashy flashy reading, reading, too. too. cles:cles: B is B for is forBluegrass, Bluegrass, clothing clothing is tradition is tradition for menfor men who who “D is“D for is Derby: for Derby: A Kentucky A Kentucky Derby Derby whichwhich is what is what it’s calledit’s called attend attend the festivities.the festivities. Alphabet,”Alphabet,” by Helen by Helen L. Wilbur L. Wilbur [32 pages, [32 pages, becausebecause the thebuds buds of the of the But But then then comes comes the themost most impor- impor-2014,2014, $16.95]. $16.95]. BigBig book book of of vehicles vehicles for for little little drivers drivers Safe in the water ou ou call call your your ing theing theone onein this in thisbook. book. He’ll He’ll also also out outof this of thisworld, world, check check out outthe lastthe last son son your your lit- lit-see see what what happens happens when when recycling recycling page page of this of thisbook. book. It’s goingIt’s going to send to send US SWIM SCHOOL enrolling children in swimming dren to open their eyes under water; YYtle tle back-seat back-seat trucks trucks and andgarbage garbage trucks trucks pick pick up uphim himover over the moon!the moon! Tips to help ASSOCIATION lessons, knowing CPR, and having if they fall in, they can find the side of driver.driver. theirtheir big loads.big loads. So youSo you say say you’ve you’ve got got a wheel- a wheel- pool fences and barriers installed. the pool or a step and get out safely. That’sThat’s because because Or maybeOr maybe he’s he’s a fan a fan of farms. of farms. wild wild youngster youngster in the in thehouse house — one — one prevent rowning is one of the lead- In addition to these vital steps, here s &O R VERY YOUNG CHILDREN PRAC- he likeshe likes to sit to in sit the in theDoes Does he love he love tractors tractors and andcombines? combines? who who can’t can’t get get enough enough of big of big ma- ma- ing causes of death in the is a list of tips parents can use to tice having them put their entire backback in your in your car, car,and andThen Then he’ll he’ll like likethe onesthe ones in this in thisbook, book, chines chines that that go? go? Then Then you’re you’re going going D United States. On average, build extra layers of protection for face under water in the bathtub and keepkeep an eye an eye out outfor forbecause because he’ll he’ll see seehow how the insidesthe insides of ofto wantto want to go to find go find “The “The Ultimate Ultimate drowning 3,533 people die as a result of drown- their children around water from blow bubbles to build their comfort anythinganything he mighthe might some some machines machines work. work. BookBook of Vehicles of Vehicles From From Around Around the the ing each year, and most of those Sue Mackie, executive director of with water. like like to drive to drive someday. someday. DoesDoes your your child child and and his grandfa-his grandfa-World.”World.” deaths are children under the age of the United States Swim School As- s # R E A TE A WATER SAFETY PLAN FOR Or haul.Or haul. Or dig. Or dig. Or float, Or float, run, run,ther ther share share a love a love of trains? of trains? Then Then he’ll he’ll There’sThere’s more! more! May is Water Safety Month 4, who drown in backyard swimming sociation. your family and have water emer- lift, lift, pump, pump, and and tow. tow. Anything Anything with with want want to show to show grandpa grandpa what’s what’s here: here: On justOn just about about every every page, page, there there pools. The tragedy of these statistics gency drills with your kids — cov- wheels,wheels, that’s that’s what what he notices. he notices. two two big big pages pages of trains of trains complete complete are are tabs tabs to pull to pull and and flaps flaps to lift. to lift. is that nearly all drowning deaths Drowning prevention ering how to recognize the signs He can’tHe can’t wait wait until until he grows he grows up. up.with with a chance a chance to peek to peek inside inside to see to seeYour Your kids kids can can deliver deliver cargo, cargo, roll roll a a are preventable. and water safety tips of someone struggling in water and But, But,if he if has he has“The “The Ultimate Ultimate Book Book of ofwhat what they they haul. haul. cementcement mixer, mixer, raise raise a scissor a scissor truck, truck, To help educate children, par- s # R E A TE A VERBAL CUE FOR YOUR TOD- what to do in this type of emer- VehiclesVehicles From From Around Around the World”the World” by by ThereThere are areeven even more more big trucksbig trucks dump dump garbage, garbage, make make hay, hay, feed feed their their ents, families and swim instructors dler or child that must be given by gency. Anne-SophieAnne-Sophie Baumann Baumann and and Didier Didier inside inside this this book. book. Your Your child child will willneighbors, neighbors, douse douse a fire, a fire,and andcaptain captain on preventive measures to avoid a you before he can enter the pool. s - A KE SURE YOUR GUESTS AND KIDS BalicevicBalicevic by his by side,his side, he can he canpretend pretend see see ambulances ambulances and and fire fire trucks trucks a ship.a ship. drowning incident, US Swim School s .EVER ALLOW YOUR BABY OR TODDLER friends know your pool rules before to drive,to drive, dig, dig,or haul or haul right right now. now. and and a fire a fire lift so lift he so can he can help help save save AndAnd what what 3-to-5-year-old 3-to-5-year-old wouldn’t wouldn’t Association, the preeminent swim in the pool without a swim diaper. they go outside and get in the pool. Let’sLet’s say say he loves he loves construction construction someone’s someone’s life. life. He can He can look look inside inside love love all ofall the of the above? above? “The “The Ulti- Ulti- school organization in the country, s # R E A TE A PROCESS THE CHILD MUST s 3TART SWIM LESSONS AT MONTHS OF equipment.equipment. Big Big trucks trucks that that haul haul a greata great big big freight freight ship, ship, a luxury a luxury mate mate Book Book of Vehicles of Vehicles From From Around Around has compiled the latest life-saving go through before entering a pool, age and continue them year-round. and anddump. dump. Gigantic Gigantic machines machines that that cruise cruise ship, ship, a medium-sized a medium-sized fishing fishing the World,”the World,” by Anne-Sophie by Anne-Sophie Baumann Baumann water safety and swim instruction such as putting on a swim diaper, a s ! L W AY S MAKE SURE YOUR CHILDREN bustbust up buildingsup buildings and anddig holesdig holes in inboat, boat, and anda fancy a fancy yacht. yacht. If he If wants he wants and and Didier Didier Balicevic Balicevic [23 [23pages, pages, 2014, 2014, tips for National Water Safety Month swimsuit, and applying sunscreen. wear life jackets on boats, personal the the ground. ground. Machines Machines that that move move to beto an be airplane an airplane pilot pilot someday, someday, $19.99]. $19.99]. in May. s .EVER USE FLOTATION DEVICES OR watercraft, and in open bodies of dirt dirt — that’s — that’s what what he loveshe loves and andthen then he’ll he’ll like like seeing seeing the the inside inside of of TerriTerri Schlichenmeyer Schlichenmeyer has beenhas been read- read- There are several standard water water wings when swimming or water. he’llhe’ll find findthem them all on all the on firstthe first pages pages a jumboa jumbo jet, jet,a cargo a cargo plane, plane, and and a aing ing since since she she was was 3 years 3 years old, old, and and safety precautions recommended when teaching kids to swim. For more information on US Swim of thisof this book. book. Have Have he ever he ever seen seen a aglider. glider. Be sureBe sure to spin to spin the thehelicop- helicop-she she never never goes goes anywhere anywhere without without a a to parents including: keeping chil- s #HILDREN SHOULD LEARN TO SWIM School Association, visit: http://www. scissorsscissors lift? lift? If he If hasn’t, he hasn’t, he’ll he’ll get getter propeller!ter propeller! book.book. She Shelives lives on a on hill a withhill withtwo twodogs dogs dren under constant supervision, without goggles. Teach your chil- usswimschool.org. an ideaan idea of what of what it’s it’slike like by mov- by mov- AndAnd finally, finally, if his if need his need for speed for speed is isand and12,000 12,000 books. books. May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 23 or bike helmet when you are rid- ing your bike,’ ” said Weaver. One of the most It can complicate things that valuable safety rules kids are trusting. “They might think it is okay to you can instill in your get in the car with a teacher or child is to always coach because they know them, The missing but the reality is that they should take a friend with not get in the car with someone BY JAMIE LOBER even if they know them unless the Renew your you because there is adult in charge of them says it is s May is Missing Kids okay,” said Weaver. commitment Awareness Month, safety in numbers. Runaways are a huge issue in A this is the prime time our state. to safety this to renew your commitment as “Sometimes kids run away be- a family to safety. younger children usually are su- cause home does not feel like This past year the num- pervised,” said Weaver. a safe place or they are being Missing Kids ber of kids reported miss- Teaching the concept of victimized, parents have drug or ing in New York State in- stranger danger in the schools has alcohol issues, an adult coming Awareness creased slightly, from 21,390 become a thing of the past since into the household that might be to 21,656. It is a very real kids are at greater risk of being touching them inappropriately or Month issue in our community, and abducted or sexually abused by just because they do not like the many families are surprised someone they know. rules,” said Weaver. to learn that all missing kids “Ninety percent of sexual It is a good idea for kids to cannot be lumped into one abuse occurs by someone the reach out to an adult that can category. child knows,” said Weaver. There help them. “There are family abduc- are a few basic ground rules you “Often times once they are out tions, non-family abductions can set with your child. “The in the community the people that which include stranger ab- first rule is to check first, which befriend them may take advan- ductions, runaways, throw- means that children should al- tage of them or get them involved aways and the issue of lost ways check with a grown-up that in prostitution, pornography or or missing children for short is in charge of them before they selling drugs,” said Weaver. periods of time,” said Pam go anywhere,” said Weaver. This Online relationships are an- Weaver, director of commu- applies to anyone who stops them other reason that kids may run nity education with the Na- or tries to get them to go in the away and that is particularly con- tional Center for Missing and car. “The second rule is to take a cerning because the person on the Exploited Children, New York friend if they are riding a bike or other end of the computer could Regional Office. playing and if they are real young, be an online predator. Speak up. The predators are not al- it should be a grown-up friend Parents need to monitor what ways who you may think. like mom, dad or a teacher,” said their kids are doing online and “It is important for people Weaver. see if they are talking to strangers to understand that children One of the hardest things for or making poor choices. are more at risk of being kids to do can be to say no but “If you are having issues with abducted by a family mem- they must figure out how. your child, quarrels or your child ber or someone they know “If anyone is making them does not want to obey the rules, instead of a stranger,” said scared, uncomfortable or trying you may want to reach out and Weaver. to take their hand to take them get some help from school,” said There are about four times somewhere and they know that Weaver. “It is really about par- as many family abductions is not the person they should be ent communication and talking to as non-family abductions. with, they should yell no,” said kids about safety in the real world “A child is usually taken Weaver. and online world as well.” because of custody issues or The final rule is for kids to If your child were to go miss- issues with divorce or hurt always tell a grown-up what has ing, the first thing you should do feelings between people, but happened if they ever feel uncom- is call 911. it is not always in the best fortable so the grown-up knows “There is no waiting period if interest of the child,” said about the potential danger. a child is missing,” said Weaver. Weaver. A parent may be You can talk about the fact It is also wise to call the National able to rationalize his choice that some kids wind up missing Center at 1-800-THE-LOST as they to take the child away, but in our community at an age-ap- can help with the investigation as that does not mean that there are dren that are by themselves walk- to and from school or school activi- propriate level with your child, well. “It is important that parents no consequences. “Even if a child is ing or playing outside are more at ties,” said Weaver. but it can be more constructive to always have a current, updated, taken by a family member they still risk because it is a crime of oppor- Kids who are unaccompanied empower them with safety skills close-up picture of their child’s could be unfortunately a victim tunity,” said Weaver. are logical targets because they rather than fear tactics. face,” said Weaver. of physical, emotional or sexual One of the most valuable safety are more vulnerable and look like “Instead of saying, ‘Look at all Jamie Lober, author of Pink Power abuse in the hands of the parent rules you can instill in your child is easy prey. these bad people in the world,’ (www.getpinkpower.com), is dedicated who takes them,” said Weaver. to always take a friend with you be- “Usually it is children between instead, say that ‘mom and dad to providing information on women’s There is no stereotypical child cause there is safety in numbers. the ages of 10 and 14 that are more love you and want to make sure and pediatric health topics. She can be that predators approach. “There are more attempts of ab- likely to be abducted in those situ- you are safe just like you wear a reached at [email protected]. “Research is telling us that chil- ductions when children are going ations because the reality is that seat belt when you are in the car © 2014 Jamie Lober 24 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 or bike helmet when you are rid- ing your bike,’ ” said Weaver. One of the most It can complicate things that valuable safety rules kids are trusting. “They might think it is okay to you can instill in your get in the car with a teacher or child is to always coach because they know them, The missing but the reality is that they should take a friend with not get in the car with someone BY JAMIE LOBER even if they know them unless the Renew your you because there is adult in charge of them says it is s May is Missing Kids okay,” said Weaver. commitment Awareness Month, safety in numbers. Runaways are a huge issue in A this is the prime time our state. to safety this to renew your commitment as “Sometimes kids run away be- a family to safety. younger children usually are su- cause home does not feel like This past year the num- pervised,” said Weaver. a safe place or they are being Missing Kids ber of kids reported miss- Teaching the concept of victimized, parents have drug or ing in New York State in- stranger danger in the schools has alcohol issues, an adult coming Awareness creased slightly, from 21,390 become a thing of the past since into the household that might be to 21,656. It is a very real kids are at greater risk of being touching them inappropriately or Month issue in our community, and abducted or sexually abused by just because they do not like the many families are surprised someone they know. rules,” said Weaver. to learn that all missing kids “Ninety percent of sexual It is a good idea for kids to cannot be lumped into one abuse occurs by someone the reach out to an adult that can category. child knows,” said Weaver. There help them. “There are family abduc- are a few basic ground rules you “Often times once they are out tions, non-family abductions can set with your child. “The in the community the people that which include stranger ab- first rule is to check first, which befriend them may take advan- ductions, runaways, throw- means that children should al- tage of them or get them involved aways and the issue of lost ways check with a grown-up that in prostitution, pornography or or missing children for short is in charge of them before they selling drugs,” said Weaver. periods of time,” said Pam go anywhere,” said Weaver. This Online relationships are an- Weaver, director of commu- applies to anyone who stops them other reason that kids may run nity education with the Na- or tries to get them to go in the away and that is particularly con- tional Center for Missing and car. “The second rule is to take a cerning because the person on the Exploited Children, New York friend if they are riding a bike or other end of the computer could Regional Office. playing and if they are real young, be an online predator. Speak up. The predators are not al- it should be a grown-up friend Parents need to monitor what ways who you may think. like mom, dad or a teacher,” said their kids are doing online and “It is important for people Weaver. see if they are talking to strangers to understand that children One of the hardest things for or making poor choices. are more at risk of being kids to do can be to say no but “If you are having issues with abducted by a family mem- they must figure out how. your child, quarrels or your child ber or someone they know “If anyone is making them does not want to obey the rules, instead of a stranger,” said scared, uncomfortable or trying you may want to reach out and “A delight for both Weaver. to take their hand to take them get some help from school,” said There are about four times somewhere and they know that Weaver. “It is really about par- kids and adults as many family abductions is not the person they should be ent communication and talking to as non-family abductions. with, they should yell no,” said kids about safety in the real world AMAZING!” “A child is usually taken Weaver. and online world as well.” because of custody issues or The final rule is for kids to If your child were to go miss- Stage and Cinema issues with divorce or hurt always tell a grown-up what has ing, the first thing you should do feelings between people, but happened if they ever feel uncom- is call 911. it is not always in the best fortable so the grown-up knows “There is no waiting period if “JAW DROPPING!” interest of the child,” said about the potential danger. a child is missing,” said Weaver. Weaver. A parent may be You can talk about the fact It is also wise to call the National Time Out NY Kids able to rationalize his choice that some kids wind up missing Center at 1-800-THE-LOST as they to take the child away, but in our community at an age-ap- can help with the investigation as “Move over Blue Man Group & Stomp, that does not mean that there are dren that are by themselves walk- to and from school or school activi- propriate level with your child, well. “It is important that parents no consequences. “Even if a child is ing or playing outside are more at ties,” said Weaver. but it can be more constructive to always have a current, updated, taken by a family member they still risk because it is a crime of oppor- Kids who are unaccompanied empower them with safety skills close-up picture of their child’s iLUMINATE is in the house!” could be unfortunately a victim tunity,” said Weaver. are logical targets because they rather than fear tactics. face,” said Weaver. Times Square Chronicles of physical, emotional or sexual One of the most valuable safety are more vulnerable and look like “Instead of saying, ‘Look at all Jamie Lober, author of Pink Power abuse in the hands of the parent rules you can instill in your child is easy prey. these bad people in the world,’ (www.getpinkpower.com), is dedicated NOW LIVE in the heart of BROADWAY! who takes them,” said Weaver. to always take a friend with you be- “Usually it is children between instead, say that ‘mom and dad to providing information on women’s There is no stereotypical child cause there is safety in numbers. the ages of 10 and 14 that are more love you and want to make sure and pediatric health topics. She can be Telecharge.com 212-239-6200 iLuminate.com that predators approach. “There are more attempts of ab- likely to be abducted in those situ- you are safe just like you wear a reached at [email protected]. New World Stages, 340 W 50th St. “Research is telling us that chil- ductions when children are going ations because the reality is that seat belt when you are in the car © 2014 Jamie Lober May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 25 ADVICE Changes to tax laws I have heard reports that the new to the next generation, because it the overall exemption, but claws state budget includes changes to the would have had to be sold to pay back lifetime gifts into the gross tax- estate tax laws. How does this affect estate taxes. able estate. Now, the gross estate of my planning? Do I need to redo my On the positive side: New York a New Yorker will include any tax- will? will allow a higher estate tax exemp- able gifts made on or after April 1, tion, raising it immediately from $1 2014 but before Jan. 1, 2019 if they ou heard correctly. Gov. million (the third lowest exemption were made within three years of ASK AN Cuomo commissioned a task in the nation) to $2,062,500. Start- death, and made while the donor Y force to examine the impact ing April 1, 2015, the exemption will was a New York resident. of taxes on New Yorkers and to pro- annually increase by $1.0625 million Taxes on trusts: The law closes ATTORNEY pose reform. The Commission con- through Jan. 1, 2019, until it reaches loopholes on trusts that were previ- ALISON ARDEN BESUNDER, cluded in December 2013 that many the original federal exemption of ously not subject to New York tax. ESQ. New Yorkers were fleeing the state to $5.25 million on Jan. 1, 2019. At that First, distributions of accumulated places like Florida that do not have point, the exemption will be annually income on or after June 1, 2014 to an estate tax. Until recently, New adjusted for inflation as is the federal New York beneficiaries of non-tax- York imposed an estate (or “death”) exemption. able New York resident trusts are tax on assets in a decedent’s estate However, “grave” dangers lurk. now taxable. This does not change exceeding $1 million. The tax was Cliff-hangers and phaseouts: De- to income accumulated before Jan. imposed only on the excess. New cedents have a narrow window to es- 1, 2014 or to non-resident trusts cre- York also did not impose a gift tax on cape, pushing the entire estate off a ated by a non-New Yorker. Second, lifetime transfers and has not done tax “cliff” into an abyss. Before April the law targets Incomplete Non- so since 1999. After a flurry of ac- 1, a New Yorker’s estate paid tax Grantor Trusts. These are trusts es- tivity, the powers that be in Albany only on assets above the $1 million tablished in another jurisdiction by included estate tax reform in the threshold, not on the entire taxable a New Yorker who is the grantor Executive Budget, which was passed estate. Under the new law, if an es- and remains a beneficiary. The law at 11 pm on March 31, effective April tate exceeds the exemption amount now treats these trusts as “grantor 1. Among other provisions (pre-K by less than five percent, the tax is trusts” for New York income tax funding!) the estate tax reform will between 6.5 percent and eight per- purposes, taxing all income to the exempt almost 90 percent of all New cent on the excess above the thresh- grantor. York estates from estate tax. This old. Once the taxable estate exceeds In addition, New York still lacks will provide relief to those whose es- the five percent, the full value of the “portability,” allowing spouses to tate value is largely made up of their estate is subject to the tax, not just automatically pass exemptions be- homes, or for the nearly 2,800 farms the amount exceeding the exemp- tween each other. in downstate and upstate New York, tion. The tax is then computed on The reform is expected to save many of which would otherwise not a sliding scale from 3.06 percent to New Yorkers $380 million over three have been able to be passed down as high as 16 percent for estates ex- years. Yet, the state expects overall ceeding $10 million. state tax revenues to increase by This translates into what is being $1.4 billion this year based on ex- referred to as the “marginal 164 per- pected economic growth. cent tax.” For example, in June 2017, It is always important to review a decedent with a New York taxable your estate plan every year to en- estate of $5,512,500 (five percent sure that it continues to meet your more than the then-$5.25 million ex- needs in light of changes to the tax emption) would pay New York estate laws, as well as changes to your fam- tax of $430,050. That is effectively a ily or assets. tax of $430,050 on the extra $262,500 Alison Arden Besunder is the found- in the decedent’s estate, as opposed ing attorney of the law firm of Arden to the roughly $26,250 that would be Besunder P.C., where she assists new due if the tax was imposed solely on and not-so-new parents with their estate the amount exceeding the exemp- planning needs. Her firm assists clients tion. This can pose serious problems in Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, Nas- for New Yorkers with assets exceed- sau, and Suffolk Counties. You can find ing five percent of the exemption, Alison Besunder on Twitter @estatetrust- inclusive of any gifts. plan and on her website at www.besun- Gift tax: The new law increases derlaw.com. Disclaimer: This column is provided by the Law Offices of Alison Arden Besunder P.C. and New York Parenting Media as a public service to inform readers of legal issues. It is not intended to advise. Since legal issues vary with an individual’s situation and needs, one should consult with an attorney. It is impossible to cover all aspects of the law in an article. Please be advised that the laws are constantly changing. The content in this article reflects the current law. Nothing contained in this article is intended as advice and does not create an attorney-client relationship between the reader and the firm. Individual consultation with an attorney is required to determine the specific facts and circumstances of any particular situ- ation. A written retainer agreement between you and the firm is required before any attorney-client relationship may be created. Circular 230 Disclosure Notice: To ensure compliance with Treasury Department rules governing tax practice, we inform you that any advice contained herein (including in any attachment) (1) was not written and is not intended to be used, and cannot be used, for the purpose of avoiding any federal tax penalty that may be imposed on the taxpayer, and (2) may not be used in connection with promoting, marketing or recommending to another person any transaction or matter addressed herein. 26 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 ADVICE THE RHYTHM OF NEW YORK Changes to tax laws I have heard reports that the new to the next generation, because it the overall exemption, but claws state budget includes changes to the would have had to be sold to pay back lifetime gifts into the gross tax- estate tax laws. How does this affect estate taxes. able estate. Now, the gross estate of my planning? Do I need to redo my On the positive side: New York a New Yorker will include any tax- will? will allow a higher estate tax exemp- able gifts made on or after April 1, tion, raising it immediately from $1 2014 but before Jan. 1, 2019 if they ou heard correctly. Gov. million (the third lowest exemption were made within three years of ASK AN Cuomo commissioned a task in the nation) to $2,062,500. Start- death, and made while the donor Y force to examine the impact ing April 1, 2015, the exemption will was a New York resident. of taxes on New Yorkers and to pro- annually increase by $1.0625 million Taxes on trusts: The law closes ATTORNEY pose reform. The Commission con- through Jan. 1, 2019, until it reaches loopholes on trusts that were previ- ALISON ARDEN BESUNDER, cluded in December 2013 that many the original federal exemption of ously not subject to New York tax. ESQ. New Yorkers were fleeing the state to $5.25 million on Jan. 1, 2019. At that First, distributions of accumulated places like Florida that do not have point, the exemption will be annually income on or after June 1, 2014 to an estate tax. Until recently, New adjusted for inflation as is the federal New York beneficiaries of non-tax- York imposed an estate (or “death”) exemption. able New York resident trusts are tax on assets in a decedent’s estate However, “grave” dangers lurk. now taxable. This does not change exceeding $1 million. The tax was Cliff-hangers and phaseouts: De- to income accumulated before Jan. imposed only on the excess. New cedents have a narrow window to es- 1, 2014 or to non-resident trusts cre- York also did not impose a gift tax on cape, pushing the entire estate off a ated by a non-New Yorker. Second, lifetime transfers and has not done tax “cliff” into an abyss. Before April the law targets Incomplete Non- Second Avenue at 8th Street (800) 982-2787 so since 1999. After a flurry of ac- 1, a New Yorker’s estate paid tax Grantor Trusts. These are trusts es- tivity, the powers that be in Albany only on assets above the $1 million tablished in another jurisdiction by www.stomponline.com Connect with us: included estate tax reform in the threshold, not on the entire taxable a New Yorker who is the grantor Executive Budget, which was passed estate. Under the new law, if an es- and remains a beneficiary. The law at 11 pm on March 31, effective April tate exceeds the exemption amount now treats these trusts as “grantor 1. Among other provisions (pre-K by less than five percent, the tax is trusts” for New York income tax funding!) the estate tax reform will between 6.5 percent and eight per- purposes, taxing all income to the exempt almost 90 percent of all New cent on the excess above the thresh- grantor. York estates from estate tax. This old. Once the taxable estate exceeds In addition, New York still lacks will provide relief to those whose es- the five percent, the full value of the “portability,” allowing spouses to tate value is largely made up of their estate is subject to the tax, not just automatically pass exemptions be- homes, or for the nearly 2,800 farms the amount exceeding the exemp- tween each other. in downstate and upstate New York, tion. The tax is then computed on The reform is expected to save many of which would otherwise not a sliding scale from 3.06 percent to New Yorkers $380 million over three have been able to be passed down as high as 16 percent for estates ex- years. Yet, the state expects overall ceeding $10 million. state tax revenues to increase by This translates into what is being $1.4 billion this year based on ex- referred to as the “marginal 164 per- pected economic growth. cent tax.” For example, in June 2017, It is always important to review a decedent with a New York taxable your estate plan every year to en- estate of $5,512,500 (five percent sure that it continues to meet your more than the then-$5.25 million ex- needs in light of changes to the tax emption) would pay New York estate laws, as well as changes to your fam- tax of $430,050. That is effectively a ily or assets. tax of $430,050 on the extra $262,500 Alison Arden Besunder is the found- in the decedent’s estate, as opposed ing attorney of the law firm of Arden to the roughly $26,250 that would be Besunder P.C., where she assists new due if the tax was imposed solely on and not-so-new parents with their estate the amount exceeding the exemp- planning needs. Her firm assists clients tion. This can pose serious problems in Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, Nas- for New Yorkers with assets exceed- sau, and Suffolk Counties. You can find ing five percent of the exemption, Alison Besunder on Twitter @estatetrust- inclusive of any gifts. plan and on her website at www.besun- Gift tax: The new law increases derlaw.com. Disclaimer: This column is provided by the Law Offices of Alison Arden Besunder P.C. and New York Parenting Media as a public service to inform readers of legal issues. It is not intended to advise. Since legal issues vary with an individual’s situation and needs, one should consult with an attorney. It is impossible to cover all aspects of the law in an article. Please be advised that the laws are constantly changing. The content in this article reflects the current law. Nothing contained in this article is intended as advice and does not create an attorney-client relationship between the reader and the firm. Individual consultation with an attorney is required to determine the specific facts and circumstances of any particular situ- ation. A written retainer agreement between you and the firm is required before any attorney-client relationship may be created. Circular 230 Disclosure Notice: To ensure compliance with Treasury Department rules governing tax practice, we inform you that any advice contained herein (including in any attachment) (1) was not written and is not intended to be used, and cannot be used, for the purpose of avoiding any federal tax penalty that may be imposed on the taxpayer, and (2) may not be used in connection with promoting, marketing or recommending to another person any transaction or matter addressed herein. May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 27 CalendarMay Shadow Box Theatre. Celebrate Mother Earth in this its delicate balance of harmony, flowing tapestry of song, dance, tolerance, and peace. Children and puppetry — “The Earth and “The Earth and Me,” on May 6, Me” at Hostos Center for the Arts 7, and 8, at 10 and 11:30 am. Tick- and Culture on May 6, 7, and 8. ets are $10 in advance and $15 at celebrate The beautifully presented pup- the door. pet play by Shadow Box Theater Hostos Center for the Arts & Culture inspires children with hope and [450 Grand Concourse at 149th Street, Mother Earth empowerment. The children learn (212) 724–0677; www.shadowboxthe- how to help protect our Earth and atre.org] 28 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Calendar Submit a listing This calendar is dedicated to bringing our readers the most comprehensive list of events in your area. But to do so, we need your help! Send your listing request to BRONX/RIVERDALEcalendar@ cnglocal.com — and we’ll take care of the rest. Please e-mail requests more than three weeks prior to the event to ensure we have enough time to get it in. And best of all, it’s FREE! Thurs, May 1 In The Bronx Learning time: Parkchester Library, 1985 Westchester Ave. at Pugsley Avenue; (718) 829–7830; 11 am; Free. Bartow-Pell Mansion Museum Children from birth to 5 years old can enjoy interactive stories, finger- play, and action songs. Clang, clang, goes the trolly Toddler time: Kingsbridge Library ime seems to stand still On May 2, tour the mansion, the evening air. Center, 310 E. Kingsbridge Rd. at Briggs Ave.; (718) 579–4244; www. at the Bartow-Pell Mansion stroll the garden, savor light re- First Friday! May 2 from 5:30 to nypl.org; noon; Free. TMuseum. And now that it’s freshments, and hop on the free 8:30 pm. Tickets $10, $8 seniors Children 18 to 36 months with par- officially spring, you can take a Bronx Seaside Trolley for a ride and students. ent or caregiver play games. trolley back to the past at the to City Island. Bartow-Pell Mansion Museum [895 Shore Rd. near Orchard Beach Road Movie day: Parkchester Library, beautiful Pelham Bay Park space You can further enjoy the 1985 Westchester Ave. at Pugsley as its First Friday! excursions are magic of the mansion at night in Pelham Bay Park, (718) 885–1461; Avenue; (718) 829–7830; 3:30–5 pm; back in business. with the help of music and savor www.bartowpellmansionmuseum.org]. Free. Teens and tweens enjoy an age-ap- propriate flick. org; Noon–4 pm; Free with museum Whale book making: Kingsbridge Sat, May 3 Sun, May 4 admission. Library Center, 310 E. Kingsbridge Rd. In The Bronx In The Bronx at Briggs Ave.; (718) 579–4244; www. Citizen Science Series introduces au- Family Art project: Wave Hill, W. diences to a range of science projects. nypl.org; 4 pm; Free. Family Art project: 10 am–1 pm. 249th Street and Independence Ave.; Children 7 to 12 years old use a va- Meet the author/illustrator: (718) 549–3200; www.wavehill.org; Wave Hill. See Saturday, May 3. riety of skills for hands-on projects. New York Transit Museum, Boerum 10 am–1 pm; Free with admission to Limited to 30 children. Place at Schermerhorn Street, Study zone: Kingsbridge Library the grounds. Brooklyn; (718) 694–1600; www.mta. Center, 310 E. Kingsbridge Rd. at Visitors to join with sculptor Matt Fri, May 2 info/mta/museum; 1:30 pm; Free with Briggs Ave.; (718) 579–4244; www. Bua and make a small outdoor dwell- museum admission. ing inspired by Mark Twain. nypl.org; noon; Free. In The Bronx Brian Biggs shares his colorful char- Game on: Parkchester Library, 1985 ComicCon 6: Kingsbridge Library acters. For children 3 years and older. Children in grades three to six can Center, 310 E. Kingsbridge Rd. at enjoy a quiet place to study, type a Westchester Ave. at Pugsley Avenue; Picture book time: New York (718) 829–7830; 3:30–4:30 pm; Free. Briggs Ave.; (718) 579–4244; www. paper or just relax. nypl.org; 11 am–7 pm; Free. Transit Museum, Boerum Place at Bring a friend and take the Xbox Schermerhorn Street, Brooklyn; (718) Children enjoy a day of comics, May Open House: Bronx Museum 360 challenge. 694–1600; www.mta.info/mta/ meeting creators, and show off their of the Arts, 1040 Grand Concourse; Game Day: Kingsbridge Library work. museum; 2–4 pm; Free with museum Center, 310 E. Kingsbridge Rd. at admission. (718) 681–6000; www.bronxmuseum. Briggs Ave.; (718) 579–4244; www. Story time en Espanol: Barnes & Educator James Giovan leads a tour org; 2–5 pm; Free. nypl.org; 4 pm; Free. Noble Bay Plaza, 290 Baychester Ave.; of Borough Hall. Suggested for chil- Help the staff open up for the sum- (718) 862–3945; barnesandnoble. Children 5 to 12 enjoy games. dren 9 years and older. Pre-registraton mer season with a performance by com; 12:30 pm; Free. required. First Fridays: Bartow-Pell “Bienvenidos!” Features Te Lo Re- Moebius, dance by Sally Silvers and Mansion Museum, 895 Shore galo, with practice of Spanish words Family walk: Brooklyn Botanic sound designed by Bruce Andrews. Rd.; (718) 885–1461; www. and stories. Garden, 1000 Washington Ave., at bartowpellmansionmuseum.org; Eastern Parkway, Brooklyn; (718) 623– Further Afield 5:30–8:30 pm; $10 ($8 seniors and Further Afield 7220; www.bbg.org; 3–4 pm; Free Meet the author/illustrator: students; Free members). Citizen Science Series: New York with admission to the gardens. Take the trolly to the mansion, enjoy Hall of Science, 47-01 111th St., at Celebrate 100 years of the children’s 1:30 pm. New York Transit Museum. concerts, take a tour of the mansion, Avenue of Science, Queens; (718) garden with an interactive walk and See Saturday, May 3. and savor light refreshments. 699–0005 X 353; www.nyscience. hands-on activities. Continued on page 30 May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 29 Calendar Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Continued from page 29 Avenue; (718) 829–7830; 3:30 pm; traditional Chinese dancers in authen- Bristly Bots: 3:30 pm. Parkchester Mon, May 5 Free. tic costumes. on -stage demos and Library. See Thursday, May 8. Students create their own robots audience interaction. Stick figures: Kingsbridge Library In The Bronx and learn about live creatures. Lim- Picture book time: 2–4 pm. New Center, 310 E. Kingsbridge Rd. at ited to 15 participants. Preregistration Presley and Melody: Parkchester York Transit Museum. See Saturday, Briggs Ave.; (718) 579–4244; www. required. Library, 1985 Westchester Ave. at May 3. nypl.org; 4 pm; Free. Pugsley Avenue; (718) 829–7830; 4 Computer basics: Poe Park Visitor Children 7 to 12 years old use a va- Family walk: 3–4 pm. Brooklyn pm; Free. Center, 2640 Grand Concourse; (718) riety of skills for hands-on projects. Botanic Garden. See Saturday, May 3. The singing duo performs for chil- 365–5516; www.nycgovparks.org; 4 Limited to 30 children. dren 18 moths to 12 years old with pm; Free. songs and fun. For children 7 to 12. Pre-registration Sun, May 11 Further Afield required. Thursday night: Brooklyn In The Bronx Tues, May 6 Children’s Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. Family Art project: 10 am–1 pm. at St. Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) In The Bronx Fri, May 9 Wave Hill. See Saturday, May 10. 735–4400; www.brooklynkids.org; 3 In The Bronx pm; Free. The Earth and Me: Hostos Center Mother’s Day brunch: Wave Hill, Enjoy the museum after hours and for the Arts & Culture, 450 Grand Game on: 3:30–4:30 pm. W. 249th Street and Independence have fun exploring. Concourse at 149th Street; (212) Parkchester Library. See Friday, May 2. Ave.; (718) 549–3200; www.wavehill. 724–0677; www.shadowboxtheatre. Game Day: 4 pm. Kingsbridge org; 11 and 11:30 am; $40 ($45 non- org; 10 am and 11:30 am; $10 ($15 at members. Fri, May 16 the door). Library Center. See Friday, May 2. Treat mom to a classic breakfast and In The Bronx A child celebrates the Earth through lunch event. Payments must be made dance, music, and puppetry. Sat, May 10 in advance, no later than May 8. Res- Game on: 3:30–4:30 pm. Parkchester Library. See Friday, May 2. Toddler time: Riverdale Library, In The Bronx ervations required. 5540 Mosholu Ave. at W. 256th Family Art project: Wave Hill, W. Study zone: noon. Kingsbridge Game Day: 4 pm. Kingsbridge Street; (718) 549–1212; www.nypl. 249th Street and Independence Ave.; Library Center. See Sunday, May 4. Library Center. See Friday, May 2. org; 11:30am – noon. (718) 549–3200; www.wavehill.org; 10 Children walking age to 36 months am–1 pm; Free with admission to the Further Afield Sat, May 17 with parent or caregiver sing, play and grounds. Block Party: 11:30 am. Brooklyn listen to stories. Honor mom with paper flowers, sa- Children’s Museum. See Saturday, In The Bronx Unplugged: Parkchester Library, chets and flowery gifts. Make a fragrant May 10. Family Art project: Wave Hill, W. 1985 Westchester Ave. at Pugsley sachet filled with lavender and tied with 249th Street and Independence Ave.; I love mommy: Brooklyn Children’s Avenue; (718) 829–7830; 3:30 pm; love for your mom. (718) 549–3200; www.wavehill.org; Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. at St. Free. 10 am–1 pm; Free with admission to Mother’s day: Barnes & Noble Bay Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) 735– Teens learn how to have fun with- Plaza, 290 Baychester Ave.; (718) 862– the grounds. 4400; www.brooklynkids.org; 2:30 Make your own puppet and its own out electronics. Bring a friend and play 3945; barnesandnoble.com; 11 am; Free. pm; Free with museum admission. board games. little home. Join in for a special Mother’s Day Children celebrate moms for Moth- story featuring “Oh, the Things My er’s Day. Summer adventure: Barnes & Wed, May 7 Mom Will Do,” then make a card for Noble Bay Plaza, 290 Baychester Ave.; mom to take home. (718) 862–3945; barnesandnoble. In The Bronx Tues, May 13 Family time: Kingsbridge Library com; 11 am; Free. The Earth and Me: 10 am and Center, 310 E. Kingsbridge Rd. at Briggs In The Bronx Oh, the places you will go is the 11:30 am. Hostos Center for the Arts theme this storytime. Ave.; (718) 579–4244; www.nypl.org; 4 11:30 am–noon. & Culture. See Tuesday, May 6. Toddler time: pm; Free. Riverdale Library. See Tuesday, May 6. Further Afield Parents with children 3 to 6 years old E-book discussion: Kingsbridge Math Mania: Brooklyn Children’s are invited to attend a reading aloud Tech time: Parkchester Library, 1985 Library Center, 310 E. Kingsbridge Rd. Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. at St. and craft event. Pre-registration re- Westchester Ave. at Pugsley Avenue; at Briggs Ave.; (718) 579–4244; www. Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) 735– nypl.org; 4 pm; Free. quired. Limited to 25 participants. (718) 829–7830; 4:30 pm; Free. Need an extra computer? Use library 4400; www.brooklynkids.org; 11:30 Children 8 to 12 years old use iPads Jose Feliciano: Lehman Center for laptops for help. For children 13 to 18 am; Free with museum admission. for book discussion group. Workshops the Performing Arts, 250 Bedford Park years old. Pre-school tots learn counting and are limited to 12 children. Pre-registra- Boulevard West; (718) 960–8833; www. discovering how much fun shapes are. tion required. LehmanCenter.org; 8 pm; $25, $40, $45 ($10 children any seat). Wed, May 14 Concert: Brooklyn Children’s Mix of soft rock and Latin pop. Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. at St. Thurs, May 8 In The Bronx Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) 735– In The Bronx Further Afield E-book discussion: 4 pm. 4400; www.brooklynkids.org; 1 pm; Free with museum admission. The Earth and Me: 10 am and Block Party: Brooklyn Children’s Kingsbridge Library Center. See MetLife Early Learner Performance 11:30 am. Hostos Center for the Arts Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. at St. Wednesday, May 7. presents a Force Majeure Quintet & Culture. See Tuesday, May 6. Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) 735– 4400; www.brooklynkids.org; 11:30 Family concert. learn all about wind Learning time: 11 am. Parkchester am; Free with museum admission. Thurs, May 15 instruments. Library. See Thursday, May 1. Children enjoy erecting new build- In The Bronx Family walk: 3–4 pm. Brooklyn Toddler time: noon. Kingsbridge ings with an assortment of blocks. Learning time: 11 am. Parkchester Botanic Garden. See Saturday, May 3. Library Center. See Thursday, May 1. Cultural connections: Brooklyn Library. See Thursday, May 1. Children’s Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. Movie day: 3:30–5 pm. Parkchester Toddler time: noon. Kingsbridge Sun, May 18 at St. Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) Library. See Thursday, May 1. Library Center. See Thursday, May 1. 735–4400; www.brooklynkids.org; 1 In The Bronx Bristly Bots: Parkchester Library, pm; Free with museum admission. Movie day: 3:30–5 pm. Parkchester Family Art project: 10 am–1 pm. 1985 Westchester Ave. at Pugsley Children of all ages view a dance of Library. See Thursday, May 1. Wave Hill. See Saturday, May 17. 30 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Calendar Study zone: noon. Kingsbridge Further Afield Kingsbridge Library Center. See The ride runs through the zoo and has Wednesday, May 7. fully animatronic dinosaurs as they Library Center. See Sunday, May 4. Circle secrets: Brooklyn Children’s move and snarl. The 40 foot T-Rex is Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. at St. Carnegie kids: Kingsbridge Library joined by deinonychus, prodohadros, Center, 310 E. Kingsbridge Rd. at Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) 735– Thurs, May 29 4400; www.brooklynkids.org; 11:30 stegosaurus and edmontonia. Briggs Ave.; (718) 579–4244; www. In The Bronx nypl.org; 2 pm; Free. am; Free with museum admission. Learn to draw: Poe Park Visitor Learning time: 11 am. Parkchester Rani Arbo and Daisy Mayhem per- What makes a circle unique? Dis- Center, 2640 Grand Concourse; (718) Library. See Thursday, May 1. 365–5516; www.nycgovparks.org; form a mix of fiddle, guitar and bass. cover the structure of the amazing Thursdays, 2–3:30 pm,; Free. shape. Toddler time: noon. Kingsbridge Further Afield Flip books: New York Transit Library Center. See Thursday, May 1. Children 10 years and older learn Math Mania: 11:30 am. Brooklyn Museum, Boerum Place at the basics of still life pencil drawing, Movie day: 3:30–5 pm. Parkchester Children’s Museum. See Saturday, Schermerhorn Street, Brooklyn; (718) including volume, tone, value, and Library. See Thursday, May 1. sketching. May 17. 694–1600; www.mta.info/mta/ museum; 1:30 pm; Free with museum Bristly Bots: 3:30 pm. Parkchester Seasonal crafts: Poe Park Visitor admission. Library. See Thursday, May 8. Center, 2640 Grand Concourse; (718) Tues, May 20 All sorts of books are on the 365–5516; www.nycgovparks.org; In The Bronx agenda for children 4 years and older. Fri, May 30 Fridays, 2–3:30 pm,; Free. Toddler time: 11:30 am–noon. NYC Atlas: New York Transit Make holiday arts and crafts. In The Bronx Riverdale Library. See Tuesday, May 6. Museum, Boerum Place at Paper Arts & Crafts: Poe Park Schermerhorn Street, Brooklyn; (718) Game on: 3:30–4:30 pm. Visitor Center, 2640 Grand Concourse; Book chat: Parkchester Library, 1985 694–1600; www.mta.info/mta/ Parkchester Library. See Friday, May 2. (718) 365–5516; www.nycgovparks. Westchester Ave. at Pugsley Avenue; museum; 2–4 pm; Free with museum Game Day: 4 pm. Kingsbridge org; Wednesdays, 1–3 pm,; Free. (718) 829–7830; 4 pm; Free. admission. Library Center. See Friday, May 2. Children have fun creating collages Teens share their favorite books. For Children 5 years and older learn using decoupage, origami, kirigami 13 to 18 year olds. about maps, then make a map of their and more. own. Sat, May 31 Story time: Barnes & Noble Bay Wed, May 21 In The Bronx Plaza, 290 Baychester Ave.; (718) In The Bronx Sun, May 25 Family Art project: Wave Hill, W. 862–3945; barnesandnoble.com; In The Bronx 249th Street and Independence Ave.; Wednesdays, 6 pm, Now – Wed, June E-book discussion: 4 pm. (718) 549–3200; www.wavehill.org; 4; Free. Family Art project: 10 am–1 pm. Kingsbridge Library Center. See 10 am–1 pm; Free with admission to Join in for a weekly sesion of fun Wave Hill. See Saturday, May 24. Wednesday, May 7. the grounds. reading and activities. Further Afield Visiting artist Virva Hinnemo creates Bronx week: Bartow-Pell a child-sized forest with movable parts Thurs, May 22 Circle secrets: 11:30 am. Brooklyn Mansion Museum, 895 Shore made out of cardboard and tempera Children’s Museum. See Saturday, Rd.; (718) 885–1461; www. In The Bronx paint. May 24. bartowpellmansionmuseum.org; Learning time: 11 am. Parkchester Further Afield Sunday, May 11, 12 pm; Monday, May Library. See Thursday, May 1. Flip books: 1:30 pm. New York 12, 12 pm; Tuesday, May 13, 12 pm; Meet the authors: New York Transit Museum. See Saturday, May Wednesday, May 14, 12 pm; Thursday, Toddler time: noon. Kingsbridge Transit Museum, Boerum Place at 24. May 15, 12 pm; Friday, May 16, 12 Library Center. See Thursday, May 1. Schermerhorn Street, Brooklyn; (718) pm; Saturday, May 17, 12 pm; Sunday, NYC Atlas: 2–4 pm. New York 694–1600; www.mta.info/mta/ Movie day: 3:30–5 pm. Parkchester May 18, 12 pm; Free. Transit Museum. See Saturday, May museum; 1:30 pm; Free with museum Library. See Thursday, May 1. 24. admission. Celebrate beauty in the borough with a guided tours. Bristly Bots: 3:30 pm. Parkchester Poets Paul Dubois Jacobs and Jen- Library. See Thursday, May 8. Mon, May 26 nifer Swender share their prose with Further Afield children 3 years and older. In The Bronx Science Playground: New York Family walk: 3–4 pm. Brooklyn Hall of Science, 47-01 111th St., at Fri, May 23 Memorial Day: Wave Hill, W. 249th Botanic Garden. See Saturday, May 3. Avenue of Science, Queens; (718) Street and Independence Ave.; (718) In The Bronx 699–0005 X 353; www.nyscience. 549–3200; www.wavehill.org; 10 org; Weekdays, 9:30 am–5 pm, Game on: 3:30–4:30 pm. am–5 pm; Free with admission to the Sun, June 1 Saturdays and Sundays, 10 am–6 pm,; Parkchester Library. See Friday, May 2. grounds. In The Bronx $4, plus museum admission. The grounds are open all day — Game Day: 4 pm. Kingsbridge Children are encouraged to explore come visit for a special guided garden Family Art project: 10 am–1 pm. Library Center. See Friday, May 2. science through slides, seesaws, climb- walk or browse through the gallery. Wave Hill. See Saturday, May 31. ing webs, a water play area, sand Sat, May 24 boxes, and more, weather permitting. Tues, May 27 Long-running In The Bronx Rocket Park Mini Golf: New York In The Bronx In The Bronx Hall of Science, 47-01 111th St., at Family Art project: Wave Hill, W. Toddler time: 11:30 am–noon. Dinosaur Safari: Bronx Zoo, 2300 Avenue of Science, Queens; (718) 249th Street and Independence Ave.; Riverdale Library. See Tuesday, May 6. Southern Blvd. at Boston Road; (718) 699–0005 X 353; www.nyscience. (718) 549–3200; www.wavehill.org; 220–5103; www.bronxzoo.com; org; Weekdays, 9:30 am–5 pm, 10 am–1 pm; Free with admission to Tech time: 4:30 pm. Parkchester Weekdays, 10 am–5 pm, Saturdays Saturdays and Sundays, 10 am–6 pm,; the grounds. Library. See Tuesday, May 13. and Sundays, 10 am–5:30 pm,; $6 (adults,) $5 (children and seniors,) Visiting artist Em Rooney helps you $20.95 ($16.95 children; Free for plus museum admission. create an environment for the great Wed, May 28 children under 3; $18.95 seniors). Golfers of all ages can learn about outdoors. Make a patio take home Mysteries Revealed features more key science concepts such as propul- fossil of an imprint of leaves and other In The Bronx than 30 dinosaur species and how sci- sion, gravity, escape velocity, launch natural objects. E-book discussion: 4 pm. entists reconstruct the fossil pieces. Continued on page 32 May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 31 PARENTING Calendar Our online calendar is updated daily at www.NYParenting.com/calendar Continued from page 31 Wednesdays and Fridays, 10:30 am–11 want the little ones to experience the Children learn all about shapes, tri- window, gravitational assist, and am, Now – Fri, May 2; Free. game. Coaches of little league and angles, squares. more! Look, listen, and have fun with pic- softball leagues throughout the bor- Urban gardening: Brooklyn Be the ‘cool’ parent ture books - for children 18 months to oughs can nominate one player their The Butterfl y Conservatory: Children’s Museum, 145 Brooklyn team to be named Little Kids, Big American Museum of Natural History, 3 years old. Ave. at St. Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; Central Park West at 79th Street, Storytime: Nolen Library, The Stars of the week. For boys and girls (718) 735–4400; www.brooklynkids. Advice for staying connected with your teen Manhattan; (212) 769–5200; www. Metropolitan Museum of Art, Fifth between the ages of 5 and 14 years org; Saturdays and Sundays, 1:30 pm, amnh.org; Daily, 10 am–5:45 pm; Now Avenue at E. 81st Street, Manhattan; old. The child should have a passion Now – Sun, June 1; Free with museum ave you watched “Mean – Mon, May 26; $27, $16 (children). (212) 570–3788; www.metmuseum. for baseball/softball, serve as a leader admission. his current circle of friends and his to the team and be helpful to the This annual favorite features up to org; Sundays – Wednesdays and Children 4 years and older learn Girls” with your teen daugh- social activities. Allow your teen to 500 live, free-flying tropical butterflies Fridays, 10:30 am–11 am, Now – Sun, coaches. The winners will receive an about seeds, planting, and how to H ter? There is a memorable have friends over regularly, so you from Central, South, and North Amer- May 4; Free. invitation to a baseball clinic with the make a garden more efficient. line in the movie when Mrs. George can get to know them on a more per- Cyclones a chance to throw out a first ica, Africa, and Asia. Look, listen, and have fun with pic- Arty facts: Brooklyn Museum, 200 states, “I’m not like a regular mom. sonal basis. Take your teen on regular ture books - Children 3 to 7 years old pitch and a commemorative T-shirt. LIONS AND “Bessie’s Big Shot”: Swedish Eastern Pkwy. at Washington Avenue, I’m a COOL mom.” Of course, Mrs. outings doing something he loves. start with a book and then explore the Cottage Marionette Theater, 79th & Touch tank: Brooklyn Children’s Brooklyn; (718) 638–5000; www. George is a caricature of a mom try- museum on a self-guided gallery hunt. TIGERS AND West Dr, Manhattan; (212) 988–9093; Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. at brooklynmuseum.org; Sundays, 11 am ing too hard to be “one of the girls.” What’s the buzz? Tuesdays – Fridays, 10:30 am & Noon, Art Kid: Brooklyn Children’s St. Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) and 1:30 pm, Now – Sun, May 18; $10 She makes mocktails for “happy Teens don’t always talk to their Saturdays and Sundays, 1 pm, Now – Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. at St. 735–4400; www.brooklynkids.org; materials fee plus museum admission. TEENS hour,” wears skimpy clothing, and parents about what is going on, but Wednesdays, Saturdays and Sundays, Sun, June 29; $10, $7 (children under Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) 735– Children 4 to 7 years old explore the MYRNA BETH HASKELL allows her daughter to occupy the parents must keep trying to break 11:30 am–12:30 pm and 2:30–3:30 12). 4400; www.brooklynkids.org; Fridays, galleries, enjoy an activity and take an master bedroom suite. that barrier. It’s a bird, it’s a plane, no — it’s 11:30 am, Now – Fri, May 30; Free pm, Now – Sun, June 1; Free with art class. with museum admission. museum admission. Are “cool parents” more in tune Malonai, recommends, “Listen to Bessie the cow! Based on the Pup- Bug out!: Brooklyn Children’s Children of all ages touch a starfish, with their teens? What does it really your teen with all that you have, and petMobile show of the same name, Children 5 years and older explore a Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. at a horseshoe crab, or a sea snail. mean to be a cool parent? make sure you are available when this popular production is making its new style each week. St. Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) the time is right.” She also advises debut at the Swedish Cottage Mari- Little Kids, Big Stars: MCU The Art of math: Brooklyn 735–4400; www.brooklynkids.org; onette Theatre. Park, 1904 Surf Ave. at W. 17th St., Children’s Museum, 145 Brooklyn Ave. Tuesdays, 11:30 am–12:30 pm and Cool parents are parents to show interest in their Toddler Storytime: Nolen Brooklyn; (718) 37-BKLYN; info@ at St. Marks Avenue, Brooklyn; (718) 2:30–3:30 pm, Now – Tues, May 6; truly connected those with whom you interact.” teen’s feelings without using accusa- Library, The Metropolitan Museum brooklyncyclones.com; www. 735–4400; www.brooklynkids.org; Free with museum admission. A cool parent is someone who can Dr. Christina G. Hibbert, a clini- tory language. For instance, a parent of Art, Fifth Avenue at E. 81st brooklyncyclones.com; Saturday, April Saturdays and Sundays, 12:30 pm, Children of all ages meet grasshop- relate to teens, but still establishes cal psychologist, mother of six, and might say, “The words in that song Street, Manhattan; (212) 570–3788; 12 – Saturday, June 7; Free. Sat, May 3 – Sun, June 1; Free with pers, worms, and Madagascar hissing a position of respect and authority. author of “This is How We Grow” tell a sad story, yet you are smiling. www.metmuseum.org; Mondays – Baseball is back and the Cyclones museum admission. cockroaches. Cool parents know that the key to (Oracle Folio Books, 2013), points out, This makes me curious.” staying on the same page as their “One of the worst things parents can Being a cool parent shouldn’t teenagers is to stay involved and in- do is try to be their teen’s friend. They means that you haven’t forgotten terested in their dreams and goals. have plenty of ‘cool’ friends. Instead what it is like to be carefree, and you theMarketplace Dr. Ilene Val-Essen, author of of trying to be like your teen, focus on can still find your sense of humor. Un- “Bring Out the Best in Your Child and being open to your teen. Do activities derstand your teen is changing and Your Self: Creating a Family Based on with them that they enjoy. Make time desires more independence, but still FAMILY LAW MODELING PARTY PLANNING Mutual Respect” (Quality Parenting, to listen whenever they need you.” insist that he follows your rules and 2010) and creator of the “Quality Par- Dr. Grace Malonai, a psychothera- expectations. enting Program” (www.qualitypar- pist specializing in parenting and >ÜÊ"vvViÃÊvÊ KIDS FOR enting.com), believes that teens want family relationships, explains, “It is Tips and tales >Û`Ê Ûi MODELING & ACTING to stay connected with their parents. common for people to think that in “I try to remind my son that I was WE NEED NEW FACES “Respect is the link,” she explains. order to connect with their teens, his age once and have ‘been there’ Family Law tChild Support BABIES, KIDS AND TEENS FOR ANIMAL WORKSHOP “Respect yourself, your children, and they need to get down on a teen’s — even though it was during the age tChild Custody tContested Divorce Fashion Print Ads, Catalogues, Party with us — level by wearing similar clothing or of the dinosaurs!” tUncontested tChild Visitation Magazines and TV Commercials Divorce tModifications of we come to you. talking the lingo. However, parents Lori Ann Jones, Salt Point, NY tProperty/Asset Custody and Support Ages: 6 months–17 years old ‘Cool parent’ dos are older and different than their “To stay connected with my teen Division tDomestic Violence Tel: 646-428-8522 !GES TO s /VER 0ARTY 4HEMES and don’ts teens, and trying to look and sound daughter, I get up to take her to the tAlimony/ & Child Abuse/ 347 W36th Street, Ste 803, 8th Fl 3TARTING AT PER CHILD like them may seem fake. Parents bus. It’s when we talk without inter- Maintenance Neglect btw 8th and 9th Aves. Here are some more tips for can connect with teens by being au- ruptions from siblings, pets or the Take Train: A, C, E to 34th Street. Call 347-210-0823 1 Riverdale Ave., Ste 3, Bronx, NY 10463 t 718-725-9600 t www.blivenlaw.net being a “cool” parent. thentic and empathetic.” phone.” s $ O DON A h7ALKING Val-Essen describes, “Cool par- Lynda Radano, Berlin, NJ PARTY PLANNING PARTY PLANNING PARTY PLANNING Dead” costume for Hal- ents are parents teens can be proud loween. of. Parents engaged in meaningful Share your ideas Top s $ O N T DRINK ALCOHOL activities — those that keep them Upcoming topic: Tips to encour- in front of your teen and alive and passionate about life — are age your teen to have healthy sleep Best Clowns Tips his friends. cool parents teens admire.” habits. Clowns s Costume Characters s $ O TRY WATERSKIING Parents should be aware of the Please send your full name, address, Princess Parties s Magicians with your teen. latest teen trends. Educate yourself and brief comments to myrnahaskell@ 1:=EViÊ*>Ì}ÊUÊ >ÊÀÌÊUÊ >}VÊUÊ>ià ter on social networking sites. music, movies, as well as anything com. Myrna Beth Haskell is a feature Cotton Candy & More ÌÌÊ >`ÞÊUÊ*«VÀ s $ O HOST A PARTY FOR YOUR illicit or unhealthy teens might be ex- writer, columnist and author of “Lions 1-800-75-CLOWN or 212-614-0988 NEW PARTY ROOM AVAILABLE teen and her friends at your posed to. You can’t advise your teen And Tigers And Teens: Expert Advice Bi-Lingual Performers Available Private & Corporate Events Call (917) 579-0867 to book your party today! house, but don’t leave the if you don’t know what is going on. and Support for the Conscientious Par- ConfettiClowns.com /ConfettiClowns All Boros, L.I. & Westchester 3190 Westchester Ave., Bronx, New York 10461 premises. Staying connected with your teen ent Just Like You” (Unlimited Publishing www.bestclownsnyc.com also means that you are familiar with LLC, 2012). 32 BRONX/RIVERDALE FAmILy • May 2014 PARENTINGPARENTING BeBe the the ‘cool’ ‘cool’ parent parent AdviceAdvice for for staying staying connected connected with with your your teen teen ave ave you you watched watched “Mean “Mean his currenthis current circle circle of friends of friends and his and his Girls”Girls” with withyour yourteen teendaugh daugh- - socialsocial activities. activities. Allow Allow your your teen teen to to HHter? Thereter? There is a is memorable a memorable have have friends friends over over regularly, regularly, so you so you line inline the in movie the movie when when Mrs. Mrs.George George can getcan to get know to know them them on a moreon a more per- per- states,states, “I’m not“I’m like not a like regular a regular mom. mom. sonalsonal basis. basis. Take Takeyour teenyour onteen regular on regular LIONSLIONS AND AND I’m aI’m COOL a COOL mom.” mom.” Of course, Of course, Mrs. Mrs. outingsoutings doing doing something something he loves. he loves. GeorgeGeorge is a caricature is a caricature of a momof a mom try- try- TIGERSTIGERS AND AND ing tooing hard too hardto be to “one be “oneof the of girls.” the girls.” What’sWhat’s the thebuzz? buzz? TEENS She She makes makes mocktails mocktails for “happy for “happy TeensTeens don’t don’t always always talk totalk their to their TEENS hour,”hour,” wears wears skimpy skimpy clothing, clothing, and and parentsparents about about what whatis going is going on, but on, but MYRNAMYRNA BETH BETH HASKELL HASKELL allowsallows her daughter her daughter to occupy to occupy the the parentsparents must must keep keep trying trying to break to break mastermaster bedroom bedroom suite. suite. that barrier.that barrier. Are “coolAre “cool parents” parents” more more in tune in tune Malonai,Malonai, recommends, recommends, “Listen “Listen to to with withtheir theirteens? teens? What What does doesit really it really your yourteen withteen allwith that all youthat have, you have, and and meanmean to be to a coolbe a parent?cool parent? makemake sure sure you areyou available are available when when the timethe time is right.” is right.” She also She alsoadvises advises CoolCool parents parents are are parentsparents to show to show interest interest in their in their trulytruly connected connected thosethose with withwhom whom you interact.” you interact.” teen’steen’s feelings feelings without without using using accusa accusa- - A coolA parentcool parent is someone is someone who canwho can Dr. ChristinaDr. Christina G. Hibbert, G. Hibbert, a clini a - clinitory- language.tory language. For instance, For instance, a parent a parent relaterelate to teens, to teens, but still but establishes still establishes cal psychologist,cal psychologist, mother mother of six, of and six, andmight might say, “The say, “The words words in that in songthat song a positiona position of respect of respect and authority. and authority. author author of “This of “This is How is How We Grow” We Grow” tell a tellsad a story,sad story, yet you yet areyou smiling. are smiling. Cool Cool parents parents know know that thatthe key the to key to(Oracle (Oracle Folio FolioBooks, Books, 2013), 2013), points points out, out,This Thismakes makes me curious.” me curious.” stayingstaying on the on same the same page page as their as their“One “Oneof the of worst the worst things things parents parents can can BeingBeing a cool a cool parent parent shouldn’t shouldn’t teenagersteenagers is to isstay to involvedstay involved and inand- indo- is dotry isto try be totheir be theirteen’s teen’s friend. friend. They They means means that that you youhaven’t haven’t forgotten forgotten terestedterested in their in theirdreams dreams and goals. and goals.have have plenty plenty of ‘cool’ of ‘cool’ friends. friends. Instead Instead what whatit is like it is to like be to carefree, be carefree, and you and you Dr. IleneDr. Ilene Val-Essen, Val-Essen, author author of of tryingof trying to be tolike be your like yourteen, teen,focus focus on oncan stillcan find still your find yoursense sense of humor. of humor. Un- Un- “Bring“Bring Out the Out Best the inBest Your in YourChild Child and andbeing being open opento your to yourteen. teen.Do activities Do activities derstand derstand your your teen teenis changing is changing and and Your YourSelf: CreatingSelf: Creating a Family a Family Based Based on onwith themwith them that theythat enjoy.they enjoy. Make Make time timedesires desires more more independence, independence, but still but still MutualMutual Respect” Respect” (Quality (Quality Parenting, Parenting, to listento listen whenever whenever they needthey needyou.” you.” insistinsist that hethat follows he follows your yourrules rulesand and 2010)2010) and creator and creator of the of “Quality the “Quality Par- Par- Dr. GraceDr. Grace Malonai, Malonai, a psychothera- a psychothera-expectations.expectations. entingenting Program” Program” (www.qualitypar (www.qualitypar- pist- pist specializing specializing in parenting in parenting and and enting.com),enting.com), believes believes that teens that teens want wantfamily family relationships, relationships, explains, explains, “It is “It Tips is Tips and and tales tales to stayto connectedstay connected with theirwith theirparents. parents. common common for people for people to think to think that inthat in “I try“I to try remind to remind my son my that son Ithat was I was “Respect“Respect is the is link,” the link,” she explains. she explains. order order to connect to connect with with their their teens, teens, his agehis once age once and have and have ‘been ‘been there’ there’ “Respect“Respect yourself, yourself, your yourchildren, children, and andthey they need need to get to down get down on a on teen’s a teen’s — even — eventhough though it was it duringwas during the age the age level level by wearing by wearing similar similar clothing clothing or orof theof dinosaurs!” the dinosaurs!” talkingtalking the lingo. the lingo. However, However, parents parents Lori AnnLori Jones,Ann Jones, Salt Point, Salt Point, NY NY ‘Cool‘Cool parent’ parent’ dos dos are olderare older and anddifferent different than than their their “To stay“To connectedstay connected with withmy teen my teen andand don’ts don’ts teens,teens, and tryingand trying to look to lookand soundand sound daughter, daughter, I get Iup get to up take to hertake to her the to the like themlike them may may seem seem fake. fake. Parents Parents bus. bus.It’s when It’s when we talk we withouttalk without inter -inter- Here Hereare some are some more more tips for tips for can connectcan connect with withteens teens by being by being au- auruptions- ruptions from from siblings, siblings, pets pets or the or the beingbeing a “cool” a “cool” parent. parent. thenticthentic and empathetic.” and empathetic.” phone.”phone.” s $ O s $DON O DON A h7ALKING A h7ALKING Val-EssenVal-Essen describes, describes, “Cool “Cool par- par- LyndaLynda Radano, Radano, Berlin, Berlin, NJ NJ Dead”Dead” costume costume for Hal- for Hal- ents areents parents are parents teens teens can be can proud be proud loween.loween. of. Parentsof. Parents engaged engaged in meaningful in meaningful Share Share your your ideas ideas TopTop s $ O Ns T $ DRINK O N T DRINK ALCOHOL ALCOHOL activitiesactivities — those — those that thatkeep keep them them UpcomingUpcoming topic: topic: Tips Tips to encour to encour- - in frontin frontof your of yourteen andteen and alive aliveand passionate and passionate about about life — life are — areage yourage yourteen teento have to havehealthy healthy sleep sleep TipsTipshis friends.his friends. cool parentscool parents teens teens admire.” admire.” habits.habits. s $ O sTRY $ O WATERSKIINGTRY WATERSKIING ParentsParents should should be aware be aware of the of the PleasePlease send yoursend fullyour name, full name, address, address, with withyour yourteen. teen. latestlatest teen teen trends. trends. Educate Educate yourself yourself and briefand briefcomments comments to myrnahaskell@ to myrnahaskell@ s $ O Ns T $ MIMIC O N T MIMIC TEENAGER TEENAGER BAN- BAN- aboutabout new newsocial social networking networking sites, sites,gmail.com gmail.com or visit or www.myrnahaskell.visit www.myrnahaskell. ter onter social on social networking networking sites. sites. music,music, movies, movies, as well as aswell anything as anything com. com. Myrna Myrna Beth Beth Haskell Haskell is a feature is a feature s $ O sHOST $ O HOST A PARTY A PARTY FOR YOUR FOR YOUR illicit illicitor unhealthy or unhealthy teens teens might might be ex be- exwriter,- writer, columnist columnist and author and author of “Lions of “Lions teen teen and her and friends her friends at your at your posedposed to. You to. can’tYou can’tadvise advise your yourteen teenAnd TigersAnd Tigers And Teens:And Teens: Expert Expert Advice Advice house,house, but don’tbut don’t leave leave the the if youif don’t you don’t know know what whatis going is going on. on.and Supportand Support for the for Conscientious the Conscientious Par- Par- premises.premises. StayingStaying connected connected with withyour yourteen teenent Justent Like Just You”Like (UnlimitedYou” (Unlimited Publishing Publishing also meansalso means that youthat are you familiar are familiar with withLLC, 2012).LLC, 2012). May 2014 • BRONX/RIVERDALE Family 33 HEALTHY EATING Taste the rainbow fter the darkness of this year’s brutal winter, we A welcome the first bright burst of spring and look forward to adding color back to our ward- robes. It’s also a good time to col- orize our diets. But how exactly is that done GOOD SENSE without breaking the bank and spending loads of time on cook- EATING ing? What are the myths about CHRISTINE M. PALUMBO, RD eating the colors of the rainbow? And how do you appeal to your picky eaters? ‘White foods aren’t good for you’ and other myths For years we’ve heard the mes- sage to eat the colors of the rain- bow. But where does that leave white and brown foods? “While it’s true that deeply pigmented produce is especially healthy, there are plenty of foods onions and mushrooms also hold Isn’t it time consuming to cook that aren’t colorful in the tradi- incredible nutritional power. healthy? Not necessarily. Large- tional sense that are still incred- You can still add color to your man-Roth suggests making a ibly good for you,” advises regis- family’s diet while staying on a bud- weekly date with your kitchen. tered dietitian nutritionist Frances get. Don’t forget frozen fruits and “If you’re ready with ingredients Largeman-Roth, author of “Eating vegetables are picked at the peak of and have blocked out time in your in Color: Delicious, Healthy Reci- freshness with a nutritional value calendar, you’ll find that you can pes for You and Your Family.” just as good as fresh. Largeman- prep enough food for three to four She points to black and tan in- Roth, a mother of two (with one meals plus snacks,” she says. gredients “like chia, hemp and flax on the way), recommends Commu- seeds, as well as barley, coconut nity Supported Agriculture shares Picky, picky, picky and chocolate,” as being healthful. to obtain lower-cost, high-quality, Playing up the fun factor of col- White foods such as cauliflower, local fresh produce. orful and nutrient-packed foods can help kids with even the most discerning palates dig into what’s Salad in a Jar DIRECTIONS: In a medium bowl, good for them. Serves 4 whisk together the oil, cranberry Even picky eaters (kids and INGREDIENTS: juice, mustard, agave nectar, vin- adults, alike) can be tantalized egar, salt, and pepper. Place the ¼ cup walnut oil with beautiful-looking food. And beans in the bowl with the dressing, don’t be afraid to serve veggies ¼ cup cranberry juice stir to coat, and set aside. Place ¼ with cheese on top or with a dip. 1 tablespoon Dijon mustard cup of the bean mixture in the bot- A little bit of extra flavor can go a 1 teaspoon agave nectar (light or tom of a tall mason jar. Follow with long way toward encouraging little dark) 2 tablespoons feta, 1 tablespoon ones to try new things. 2 teaspoons red wine vinegar cranberries, one-quarter of the radic- Vibrantly colored foods found ¹⁄8 teaspoon salt chio, and one-quarter of the red leaf in nature can be healthful and lettuce. Repeat with the remaining ¹⁄8 teaspoon freshly ground black taste yummy, too. So add a pop of jars. pepper spring color not only to your ward- robe this month, but also to your 1-15 ounce can garbanzo beans, NUTRITION FACTS: 330 calories, family’s meals. rinsed and drained 32 g carbohydrates, 5 grams fiber, 7 Christine Palumbo is a Naperville- ½ cup crumbled feta cheese grams sugar, 9 g protein, 18 g fat (4 g sat fat), 17 mg cholesterol, 428 mg registered dietitian nutritionist who is a ¼ cup dried cranberries sodium new Fellow of the American Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics. Follow her 1 head radicchio, sliced crosswise Used with permission from Eating in Color: into ribbons Delicious, Healthy Recipes for You and Your on Twitter @PalumboRD, Facebook at ½ head red leaf lettuce, chopped Family, Stewart, Tabori & Chang, 2014 Christine Palumbo Nutrition, or Chris@ ChristinePalumbo.com. 34 BRONX/RIVERDALE Family • May 2014 NEW YORK SPECIAL CHILD Summer/Early Fall 2011 LONG ISLAND SPECIAL CHILD NEW YORK FREE SPECIAL CHILD Trusted since 2008 www.NYParenting.com 5 myths Fall/Winter 2011–2012 RoutinesNEW YORK aboutFREE bringSPECIAL CHILDfitness benefitswww.NYParenting.com & autism Celebrating Informing & Enriching Five Y e a r s “Special Needs” in print Positive Families throughout behavior support NYC & Long Island Cultivating winningOptimistic attitudesparenting The power of music For more information about distribution or Summer/Early Fall 2011 LONG ISLAND FREE how to get your free copy, please Fall/Winter 2010/2011 LONG SPECIALISLAND CHILDFREE www.webfamilyny.com e-mail us at [email protected]. SPECIAL CHILD5 myths w w w .NYParenting Routines.com about bring fitness Visit us online at benefits & autism WWW.90ARENTINGCOM Tips to ,IKE US ON OUR &ACEBOOK PAGE .90ARENTING organize 8 your child OR FOLLOW US ON 4WITTER Take charge Creating an IEP Cultivating winning attitudes To advertise your business and or services School blues Overcoming anxiety CONTACT US AT OR E MAIL US AT FAMILY CNGLOCALCOM Family Publications New York/CNG -ETRO4ECH #ENTER .ORTH TH &L s "ROOKLYN .9 s FAMILY CNGLOCALCOM $ 1 9 . $& % & !'( ) &"--/ 0"! 1*'$ $%! &'( ! ! 234 . 526 7 8 ! , ! ! " # - $. , ) ) , 26334 . $% &' ! (%% ) # ! ! " # "#! $%! &'( ")*"+$ " ! # ! $ ! % $ : 3 $ $7 ) ! 6 3 $ $7 ) ! 3 6 ; $ ; +( 6 ! """#$ %