STATEN ISLAND Family May 2014
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May 2014 STATEN ISLAND FORARTS KIDSFREE Family Where Every Child Matters THE Mother’s Day ISSUE • 6 new surprises about moms • Moms who volunteer • How stay-at- home moms can build a circle of friends Find us online at www.NYParenting.com 7+(21/<3/$&( 72*2%2:/,1* home to staten island`s only laser maze! WE THROW THE BEST PARTY IN TOWN! 2 HOUR PARTYPARTY PACKAGES PACKAGES IN INCLUDE:CLUDE: Invitations Paper GoodGoodss Bowling or laser maze Use of Bowling Shoes Private Room or Behind Lane setup Use of Light Weight Bowling Balls Pizza Soda Bowling Pin for Birthday Child Balloon Centerpiece Bowlopolis DVD for each Guest Bowlopolis Treat Cup Extended Bowling and/or Party Time Cosmic Bowling Kiddie Cakes Ice Cream Cake Colorable Birthday T-Shirts Laser Maze Challenge #1 watch bowling <287+ destination Bowling makes for bowling for leagues scores %2:/,1* birthday the perfect livE for all! fundraiser! 352*5$06 parties! 21/,1( SPRING YOUTH S BOWLING PROGRAMS NOW FORMING! NEW!N ON-GOING Introduce your child to REGISTRATION bowling before making CALL US TODAY the commitment! FOR DETAILS! 4 week introduction program! +\ODQ%RXOHYDUG_6WDWHQ,VODQG1< _,VODQG 1< ZZZERZODWUDEVFRP STATEN ISLAND Family May 2014 16 FEATURES COLUMNS 6 The science of moms 10 FabuLYSS Finds Six surprising things you may not know BY LYss STERN about mothers BY KIKI BOCHI 18 Just Write Mom BY DANIELLE SULLIVAN 8 Lessons in volunteering 19 Divorce & Separation from mom BY LEE CHABIN, EsQ. BY TAMMY SCILEPPI 20 Dear Dr. Karyn 12 Circle of friends BY DR. KARYN GORDON Thirty days to a healthier social life BY CHRIstA MELNYK HINES 23 Parents Helping Parents 14 Take note BY SHARON C. PETERS 14 How to tell when your child is ready for 26 Ask an Attorney music lessons BY ALISON ARDEN BESUNDER, EsQ. BY LEILA VIss 34 Good Sense Eating 16 Three ways to nurture BY CHRIstINE M. PALUMBO, RD creativity Ignite their imaginations with these helpful tips CALENDAR BY MICHELE RANARD 28 May Events 22 Safe in the water Tips to help prevent drowning SPECIAL SECTIONS 24 The missing 17 Arts Directory Renew your commitment to safety this Missing Kids Awareness Month 33 The Marketplace BY JAMIE LOBER 28 May 2014 • STATEN ISLAND FAMilY 3 Letter from the publisher Mother’s Day musings ’ve been watch- emerged after an ex- that matures out of the adolescent miracle that changed our lives for- ing this wonderful hausting 13 hours. that drove you crazy and wouldn’t ever. I, for one, can honestly say that I series on PBS that Being a Mother is not listen anymore and the mutual bond it was the best thing that has every airs on Sunday nights always fun. In the early of adults who happen to be parents happened to me. with the title “Call the weeks after birth there and their children. Wishing all of you the Happy Midwife.” It takes place are the every few hours It’s an amazing miracle and Mother’s Day you most likely gener- in the east end of Lon- wake-ups, feedings and whether you’re a natural Mom or ously deserve. Enjoy all the memo- don in the 1950s and a baby sometimes cry- an adoptive Mom or a Step-Mom, ries and all the milestones, those reflects the changing ing and you don’t know the miracle is the same. To watch that have passed, and those yet to experience of birthing why. There is the frus- the development of another human come. Let someone pamper you a and parenting as the tration of the teen years being is truly awesome. To have a bit this Mother’s Day if it comes your war years dimmed into the past. and the loss of control over the child major role in that development is a way, and enjoy the best part of all, It’s one of the most socially relevant you had that is now often taller than privilege and a gift and it’s hard to the fact that there is someone in this shows I’ve ever seen about being a you and more influenced by friends imagine a role in life that could be world who calls you Mother. Mother and birthing a child and the and the media than by you. quite as satisfying, quite as fulfilling Thanks for reading. network of community. But most of it is sheer bliss. The over a lifetime. Reliving all the pregnancies and tiny infant that suddenly develops The celebration of Mother’s Day the births every week has rekindled a personality; the first steps; the offers an opportunity for our chil- my own maternal experience from first time you hear your child say dren to make us a breakfast or buy the first fluttering I felt in the bath Mama; the first day of preschool; the us a meal in a restaurant or at the one night, to the hours of labor and graduations; the growth spurts that very least to recognize our constant Susan Weiss-Voskidis, birth, to the 23 years since that make yesterdays clothes and shoes love in their lives and say thank you. Publisher/Excutive Editor moment when my daughter at last a thing of the past; the young adult For us, it’s a day to be grateful for a [email protected] STAFF CONTACT INFORMATION PUBLISHER / EXECUTIVE EDITOR: ADVERTISING: WEB OR PRINT ADDRESS Susan Weiss (718) 260-4554 New York Parenting Media/CNG PUBLISHER / BUSINESS MANAGER: [email protected] or 1 Metrotech Center North Clifford Luster [email protected] 10th Floor Brooklyn, NY 11201 SALES MANAGER / ADVERTISING: CIRCULATION Sharon Noble (718) 260-8336 [email protected] OPERATIONS ASSOCIATE: www.NYParenting.com Tina Felicetti EDITORIAL (718) 260-4554 SALES REPS: Alexis Benson, Lori Falco, [email protected] Sharon Leverett, Shanika Stewart ART DIRECTOR: Leah Mitch CALENDAR (718) 260-2523 PRODUCTION DIRECTOR: On Man Tse LAYOUT MANAGER: Yvonne Farley The acceptance of advertising by New York Parent- New York Parenting Media has been recognized WEB DESIGNER: Sylvan Migdal ing Media does not constitute an endorsement of for editorial and design excellence by PMA. GRAPHIC DESIGNERS: Arthur Arutyunov, the products, services or information being adver- New York Parenting Media is published monthly tised. We do not knowingly present any products or Mauro Deluca, Earl Ferrer, Cheryl Seligman by New York Parenting Media/CNG. Subscription services that are fraudu lent or misleading in nature. rate is $35 annually. Reproduction of New York Editorial inquiries, calendar information, advertising Parenting Media in whole or part without writ- rates and schedules and subscription requests may be ten permission from the publisher is prohibited. MANAGING EDITOR: Vince DiMiceli addressed to New York Parenting Media, One Metro- All rights reserved. Copyright©2014 Readership: th ASSISTANT EDITOR: Courtney Donahue tech Center North, 10 Floor, Brooklyn, N.Y. 11201. 220,000. 2012 circulation audits by CAC & CVC. New York Parenting Media can also be reached by COPY EDITOR: Lisa J. Curtis calling (718) 260-4554, emailing family@cnglocal. CALENDAR EDITORS: Joanna Del Buono, com or by visiting our website, NYParenting.com. Jesseca Stenson Join the conversation on Facebook. 4 STATEN ISLAND FAMilY • May 2014 Mathnasium has two convenient locations: Dongan Hills Pleasant Plains 1781 Richmond Road, Staten Island, NY 10306 6390 Amboy Road, Staten Island, NY 10309 www.mathnasium.com/statenislandeast www.mathnasium.com/statenislandsouth (718) 987-MATH (6284) (718) 227-MATH (6284) May 2014 • STATEN ISLAND FAMilY 5 The science of moms Six surprising BY KIKI BOCHI others may be the things you glue that holds M many families to- gether, but no two mommies may not are alike. Still, there are some things moms do have know about in common — and at the top of that list is the huge impact they have on the lives of mothers their children. To get to the core of these very important family figures, moms are the subject of scientific studies all over the world. Here is the good news in some of the findings. Good moms have smarter kids School-age children whose mothers nurtured them early in life have brains with a larger hippocampus, a key structure important to learn- ing, memory, and response to stress, according to re- search in the Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences. The research, by child psychiatrists and neurosci- entists at Washington Uni- versity School of Medicine, was Being an empathetic Attentive moms help the first to show that a mother’s mom goes a long way keep kids off drugs nurturing is linked to this critical Nurturing mothers have always Through daily interactions, good region of children’s brain anatomy. garnered accolades for kissing moms help children understand “This study validates something boo-boos and soothing children healthy boundaries, learn self-con- that seems to be intuitive, which to sleep with lullabies. Now they’re trol and make good decisions. But is just how important nurturing getting credit for their offspring’s it goes beyond that. parents are to creating adaptive physical health in middle age. A strong mother-child bond in human beings,” research author Dr. In a long-term study published in childhood, especially in the first Joan L. Luby, said when the study the journal Psychological Science, three years of life, develops the was released. “I think the public psychologists found that even brain chemistry that can help health implications suggest that we among groups that would have people resist drug and alcohol ad- should pay more attention to par- higher rates of chronic illness in dition later in life. The research, ents’ nurturing, and we should do adulthood, adults who had nurtur- conducted in Australia, found that what we can as a society to foster ing mothers in childhood fared bet- some people’s lack of resilience to these skills because clearly nurtur- ter in physical health in midlife.